Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
2
00:02:59,048 --> 00:03:00,842
Goddamn bugs.
3
00:03:20,945 --> 00:03:22,572
Oh, shit!
4
00:03:27,410 --> 00:03:28,953
Oh, crap.
5
00:03:41,215 --> 00:03:43,551
Well, Nick the Dick.
What a surprise.
6
00:03:43,801 --> 00:03:45,261
Where you coming from?
7
00:03:45,970 --> 00:03:47,847
Fishing in Cuernavaca.
8
00:03:48,097 --> 00:03:50,391
Sure. Let's take a look
at your catch.
9
00:03:51,726 --> 00:03:52,894
Come on.
10
00:04:00,484 --> 00:04:02,236
I would've thrown them back.
11
00:04:08,826 --> 00:04:11,495
What do you get?
100 bucks a head? 200?
12
00:04:11,871 --> 00:04:15,333
Hope you saved it all for your lawyer.
You'll need it.
13
00:04:20,171 --> 00:04:21,255
We'll take it from here.
14
00:04:21,714 --> 00:04:22,882
Who the hell are you?
15
00:04:23,132 --> 00:04:24,425
INS, Division 6.
16
00:04:24,675 --> 00:04:27,011
Division 6?
I never heard of Division 6.
17
00:04:27,261 --> 00:04:28,304
Really?
18
00:04:29,305 --> 00:04:30,431
Who you betting on?
19
00:04:31,265 --> 00:04:32,600
Tough call, Kay.
20
00:04:33,809 --> 00:04:36,062
What's up, how are you?
21
00:04:36,312 --> 00:04:37,772
Good, good.
22
00:04:38,606 --> 00:04:40,524
Grandma, don't worry.
23
00:04:40,775 --> 00:04:43,194
Welcome to the United States.
24
00:04:43,819 --> 00:04:45,988
Where are you going, Nogales?
25
00:04:46,363 --> 00:04:48,032
Looking for work?
26
00:04:48,491 --> 00:04:49,992
And you, the same?
27
00:04:50,326 --> 00:04:51,702
And you?
28
00:04:52,119 --> 00:04:53,662
Pleasure seeing you here.
29
00:04:54,205 --> 00:04:55,789
And you?
30
00:04:56,707 --> 00:04:59,251
What if I break your face?
31
00:05:01,629 --> 00:05:03,881
You're very ugly, no?
32
00:05:05,799 --> 00:05:07,801
You don't speak a word of Spanish.
33
00:05:09,136 --> 00:05:10,429
We've got a winner here.
34
00:05:10,679 --> 00:05:12,097
Oh, I know.
35
00:05:12,556 --> 00:05:14,725
The rest of you can leave.
36
00:05:14,975 --> 00:05:16,477
Don't move!
37
00:05:16,727 --> 00:05:18,812
Get in the truck and leave.
38
00:05:19,230 --> 00:05:20,064
Sir, you can't...
39
00:05:20,272 --> 00:05:21,857
Don't "sir" me, young man.
40
00:05:22,066 --> 00:05:24,860
You have no idea
who you're dealing with.
41
00:05:26,570 --> 00:05:29,406
Get in the truck right now!
42
00:05:30,866 --> 00:05:33,285
We'll chat with our friend.
You hit the road.
43
00:05:34,870 --> 00:05:38,415
Keep on protecting us from
the dangerous aliens.
44
00:05:42,753 --> 00:05:44,672
You ever hear of Division 6?
45
00:05:44,922 --> 00:05:46,674
There is no Division 6.
46
00:05:46,924 --> 00:05:48,008
This is bullshit.
47
00:05:48,258 --> 00:05:49,385
Hell, yeah.
48
00:05:50,844 --> 00:05:54,014
Looks like you fell off the bus
in the wrong part of town.
49
00:05:54,264 --> 00:05:57,101
I'll bet you're not
from anywhere near here.
50
00:06:01,063 --> 00:06:02,397
Mikey?
51
00:06:09,655 --> 00:06:11,698
Mikey, when they let you out of jail?
52
00:06:13,242 --> 00:06:14,409
Political refugee.
53
00:06:14,660 --> 00:06:17,538
You know how many treaties
you just violated?
54
00:06:18,247 --> 00:06:20,040
- One?
- Try seven.
55
00:06:23,085 --> 00:06:24,753
You hand me that head.
56
00:06:30,425 --> 00:06:31,969
Put up your arms and flippers.
57
00:06:43,939 --> 00:06:44,856
Shit!
58
00:06:49,319 --> 00:06:50,696
Shoot him!
59
00:07:21,435 --> 00:07:22,978
- "That."
- That...
60
00:07:25,439 --> 00:07:28,984
Was not human. I know.
You got some entrails on you.
61
00:07:30,318 --> 00:07:31,278
What the hell?
62
00:07:31,528 --> 00:07:33,029
The situation's under control.
63
00:07:33,321 --> 00:07:35,448
Give me your attention for a moment.
64
00:07:35,949 --> 00:07:37,617
I'll tell you what happened.
65
00:07:46,459 --> 00:07:51,047
This is called a neuralizer. It's
a gift from friends from out of town.
66
00:07:51,298 --> 00:07:53,133
This red eye isolates...
67
00:07:53,383 --> 00:07:56,428
...the brain's impulses,
specifically the ones for memory.
68
00:07:57,012 --> 00:07:59,222
Give me a splay burn on
the perimeter...
69
00:07:59,472 --> 00:08:01,641
...with holes at 40, 60,
and 80 metres...
70
00:08:02,017 --> 00:08:04,019
...from right here.
Thank you.
71
00:08:09,733 --> 00:08:10,567
That's good.
72
00:08:11,318 --> 00:08:12,569
What's going on?
73
00:08:12,861 --> 00:08:14,279
Excellent question.
74
00:08:14,529 --> 00:08:17,157
The answer you're looking for
lies right here.
75
00:08:20,243 --> 00:08:22,078
Who are you, really?
76
00:08:22,329 --> 00:08:23,163
Really?
77
00:08:24,247 --> 00:08:27,375
I am just a figment
of your imagination.
78
00:08:31,671 --> 00:08:33,715
Damn, what a gullible breed.
79
00:08:34,924 --> 00:08:38,428
I'm serious. You're lucky
to be alive after that blast.
80
00:08:38,678 --> 00:08:39,512
What blast?
81
00:08:39,721 --> 00:08:41,264
The underground gas main.
82
00:08:41,514 --> 00:08:43,725
You should exercise caution
before firing...
83
00:08:43,975 --> 00:08:46,394
...l'll tell you that now.
Especially you.
84
00:08:47,937 --> 00:08:50,857
Have yourself checked out with EMS
before you leave.
85
00:09:03,703 --> 00:09:05,288
I'm sorry about back there.
86
00:09:05,538 --> 00:09:06,789
It happens.
87
00:09:07,040 --> 00:09:08,541
Didn't used to.
88
00:09:10,585 --> 00:09:12,921
The spirit's willing, Kay...
89
00:09:14,255 --> 00:09:16,049
...but the rest of me...
90
00:09:18,968 --> 00:09:20,929
They're beautiful, aren't they?
91
00:09:21,721 --> 00:09:23,264
The stars.
92
00:09:24,390 --> 00:09:26,434
We never just look anymore.
93
00:09:32,065 --> 00:09:33,733
I'll tell you, Kay...
94
00:09:34,609 --> 00:09:36,778
...I will miss the chase.
95
00:09:42,075 --> 00:09:42,950
No, Dee...
96
00:09:44,118 --> 00:09:45,286
...you won't.
97
00:09:47,121 --> 00:09:48,581
Freeze!
98
00:09:48,790 --> 00:09:50,958
NYPD! Freeze!
99
00:09:52,418 --> 00:09:53,753
All yours, Edwards.
100
00:09:55,755 --> 00:09:57,340
Freeze means stop!
101
00:10:03,971 --> 00:10:05,473
What the hell?!
102
00:10:13,981 --> 00:10:16,818
It just be raining black people
in New York.
103
00:10:42,009 --> 00:10:43,552
Do you see this?
104
00:10:43,803 --> 00:10:45,763
N-Y-P-D!
105
00:10:45,972 --> 00:10:48,557
Means I will knock your punk-ass down!
106
00:10:48,808 --> 00:10:50,142
He's coming!
107
00:10:50,393 --> 00:10:53,187
Yeah, and when he gets here,
I'll arrest his ass too.
108
00:10:57,066 --> 00:10:59,360
You trying to catch a beat-down?
109
00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:07,928
What's up?
110
00:12:09,638 --> 00:12:10,931
He's coming.
111
00:12:11,223 --> 00:12:14,018
He's coming because I failed.
Now he'll kill me.
112
00:12:14,268 --> 00:12:16,562
You pissing everybody off today, huh?
113
00:12:18,397 --> 00:12:20,065
You don't understand.
114
00:12:20,315 --> 00:12:22,484
Your world's gonna end.
115
00:12:25,571 --> 00:12:26,739
What are you?
116
00:12:32,745 --> 00:12:35,038
Watch that ledge. Watch the ledge.
117
00:12:35,289 --> 00:12:38,584
Come on down. We'll get those
eyes fixed, don't worry.
118
00:12:38,834 --> 00:12:41,003
Wait a minute.
Let me talk to you!
119
00:12:48,635 --> 00:12:50,679
I work my butt off to make a living.
120
00:12:50,929 --> 00:12:54,224
All I want is to come home to
a fat steak on the table...
121
00:12:54,475 --> 00:12:56,727
...but instead I get this.
It looks like poison.
122
00:12:57,102 --> 00:13:01,231
Don't take that away! I'm eating that!
It is poison, isn't it?
123
00:13:01,481 --> 00:13:04,067
I swear, I wouldn't
be surprised if it was...
124
00:13:04,318 --> 00:13:07,905
...the way you skulk like a dog
been hit too much, or not enough!
125
00:13:08,155 --> 00:13:09,406
I can't decide.
126
00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:11,283
You're useless, Beatrice.
127
00:13:11,533 --> 00:13:15,662
The only thing that pulls its weight
around here is my goddamn truck!
128
00:13:25,881 --> 00:13:27,299
Figures.
129
00:13:36,350 --> 00:13:37,893
What the heck is it?
130
00:13:39,186 --> 00:13:41,313
Get your big butt back in the house.
131
00:13:53,909 --> 00:13:57,287
Place projectile weapon on the ground.
132
00:13:57,537 --> 00:13:59,247
You can have my gun...
133
00:13:59,456 --> 00:14:01,625
...when you pry it
from my dead fingers.
134
00:14:01,875 --> 00:14:04,211
Your proposal is acceptable.
135
00:14:46,544 --> 00:14:48,296
Edgar, what on earth was that?
136
00:14:48,546 --> 00:14:49,714
Sugar.
137
00:14:50,090 --> 00:14:52,425
I've never seen sugar do that.
138
00:14:53,593 --> 00:14:55,762
Give me sugar.
139
00:15:00,475 --> 00:15:01,768
In water.
140
00:15:08,233 --> 00:15:09,401
More.
141
00:15:12,987 --> 00:15:14,114
More.
142
00:15:28,670 --> 00:15:30,755
Your skin is hanging off your bones.
143
00:15:42,517 --> 00:15:43,560
Is that better?
144
00:16:13,006 --> 00:16:15,633
"The perpetrator blinked
two sets of eyelids."
145
00:16:15,883 --> 00:16:17,593
Blinked with both eyes?
146
00:16:17,802 --> 00:16:20,888
He blinked one set,
then a completely different set.
147
00:16:21,139 --> 00:16:23,641
You know, like high beams
and low beams.
148
00:16:24,809 --> 00:16:28,604
Was that before or after he drew
the weapon that you claim...
149
00:16:28,855 --> 00:16:30,982
...evaporated into a million pieces?
150
00:16:31,232 --> 00:16:32,859
After, sir.
151
00:16:33,735 --> 00:16:37,447
Why is it that no other officers saw
either of these events?
152
00:16:37,697 --> 00:16:40,283
Some of them are
soggy around the midsection.
153
00:16:40,533 --> 00:16:42,118
They weren't able to keep up.
154
00:16:42,326 --> 00:16:44,370
If you were half the man I am...
155
00:16:44,704 --> 00:16:47,165
I am half the man that you are.
156
00:16:47,415 --> 00:16:49,041
What is your problem?
157
00:16:49,292 --> 00:16:50,418
You're in my face.
158
00:16:50,668 --> 00:16:53,171
- I think he threw him off the roof.
- You next.
159
00:16:53,379 --> 00:16:54,422
I wanna talk to you.
160
00:16:54,630 --> 00:16:57,341
Ten minutes,
you take your best shot, tough guy.
161
00:16:58,259 --> 00:17:01,929
Take 10 minutes on a StairMaster,
you pudgy bastard!
162
00:17:07,184 --> 00:17:09,687
I believe you. Laurel Weaver.
Deputy Medical Examiner.
163
00:17:09,937 --> 00:17:12,023
Find me at the morgue. I'll show you.
164
00:17:12,231 --> 00:17:13,065
Wait.
165
00:17:13,399 --> 00:17:14,358
Wait a minute!
166
00:17:15,401 --> 00:17:19,614
You're Dr. Weaver with the coroner's
office working on the John Doe?
167
00:17:19,822 --> 00:17:22,366
- That's right.
- Will you look at this, please?
168
00:17:29,582 --> 00:17:31,042
Some night, huh?
169
00:17:31,375 --> 00:17:32,209
Some night.
170
00:17:32,418 --> 00:17:34,378
They were gills, not eyelids.
171
00:17:35,796 --> 00:17:37,757
Gills. He was out of breath.
172
00:17:38,591 --> 00:17:39,717
Who are you?
173
00:17:39,967 --> 00:17:41,635
Did he say anything to you?
174
00:17:41,886 --> 00:17:43,846
He said the world was
coming to an end.
175
00:17:44,930 --> 00:17:46,307
Did he say when?
176
00:17:52,396 --> 00:17:55,149
Would you recognize his weapon
if you saw it again?
177
00:17:55,399 --> 00:17:56,776
Absolutely.
178
00:17:58,402 --> 00:18:00,070
Come on, let's take a ride.
179
00:18:00,321 --> 00:18:03,073
Wait a minute. Look, I got
tons of paperwork...
180
00:18:03,324 --> 00:18:04,200
It's all done.
181
00:18:04,450 --> 00:18:05,326
Good work.
182
00:18:05,576 --> 00:18:08,496
You really ran this dude down on foot?
That's tough.
183
00:18:08,746 --> 00:18:10,289
That's double tough.
184
00:18:20,216 --> 00:18:20,633
So who exactly are you with?
185
00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:22,426
So who exactly are you with?
186
00:18:22,676 --> 00:18:24,845
FBI? NSA?
187
00:18:25,095 --> 00:18:29,642
I'm part of a bureau that licenses,
monitors and polices aliens on Earth.
188
00:18:29,892 --> 00:18:31,185
Yeah, whatever.
189
00:18:31,393 --> 00:18:32,645
We're here.
190
00:18:34,605 --> 00:18:36,315
This is where we're going?
191
00:18:37,066 --> 00:18:38,484
This is Jack Jeebs' spot.
192
00:18:38,692 --> 00:18:41,028
He buys from chain-snatchers.
Doesn't sell guns.
193
00:18:41,278 --> 00:18:42,321
Really?
194
00:18:42,947 --> 00:18:43,906
All right, look.
195
00:18:44,114 --> 00:18:48,243
I'm gonna go in and put my thing down,
but when I come out, I want answers.
196
00:18:48,494 --> 00:18:50,162
Okay, go put your thing down.
197
00:18:56,210 --> 00:18:57,670
Officer Eduardo!
198
00:18:57,920 --> 00:19:00,756
How did these get here?
I thought I turned them in.
199
00:19:01,006 --> 00:19:04,343
I hear you're into something hotter
than stolen Rolexes.
200
00:19:04,551 --> 00:19:07,304
I deal crack, but I still work here.
I love the hours.
201
00:19:07,763 --> 00:19:10,682
I'm talking about guns, smart-ass!
Weird ones.
202
00:19:11,308 --> 00:19:14,103
Come on!
What you see is what I got.
203
00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:18,023
Show him the imports, Jeebs.
204
00:19:19,149 --> 00:19:20,776
Hey, Kay. How are you?
205
00:19:21,026 --> 00:19:24,071
- Show him the imports.
- I got out of that business.
206
00:19:24,321 --> 00:19:25,823
Why do you lie to me?
207
00:19:26,323 --> 00:19:27,533
Hold on a second.
208
00:19:27,866 --> 00:19:28,951
I'll count to three.
209
00:19:29,201 --> 00:19:32,120
He'll do it, Jeebs.
That man does not look stable.
210
00:19:32,329 --> 00:19:34,998
You know what? He's crazy
when he's like this.
211
00:19:35,249 --> 00:19:37,209
He's always crazy.
Get a massage.
212
00:19:37,459 --> 00:19:38,335
Take a cruise...
213
00:19:39,127 --> 00:19:41,421
- Drop the weapon.
- I warned him.
214
00:19:41,672 --> 00:19:42,506
Drop the weapon!
215
00:19:42,714 --> 00:19:44,007
- You warned him.
- I'll kill you.
216
00:19:44,258 --> 00:19:47,386
You insensitive jerk!
217
00:19:51,181 --> 00:19:53,558
Do you have any idea
how much that stings?
218
00:19:53,934 --> 00:19:56,311
Show us the merchandise,
or you'll lose another head.
219
00:20:09,157 --> 00:20:09,992
Mr. Edwards...
220
00:20:15,455 --> 00:20:17,416
There, the one in the middle.
221
00:20:20,585 --> 00:20:24,172
You sold a reverberating carbonizer
with mutate capacity...
222
00:20:24,423 --> 00:20:26,842
...to an unlicensed cephalopoid!
You piece of...
223
00:20:27,300 --> 00:20:28,593
He looked okay to me.
224
00:20:28,802 --> 00:20:30,720
It was for an assassination.
The target?
225
00:20:30,971 --> 00:20:31,888
I don't know.
226
00:20:32,097 --> 00:20:33,974
- Goddamn it!
- I don't know!
227
00:20:35,434 --> 00:20:36,768
All that's confiscated.
228
00:20:37,018 --> 00:20:41,106
Be on the next transport off this rock,
or I shoot where it don't grow back.
229
00:20:45,193 --> 00:20:48,238
And I'm gonna be back
to talk about them Rolexes.
230
00:21:10,885 --> 00:21:13,054
Searching for a handle on the moment?
231
00:21:14,764 --> 00:21:16,266
I can't help you.
232
00:21:17,225 --> 00:21:18,810
The only comfort I can offer...
233
00:21:19,060 --> 00:21:22,397
...is my promise that tomorrow
you won't remember a thing.
234
00:21:22,939 --> 00:21:25,567
That's not exactly
some shit you forget.
235
00:21:25,817 --> 00:21:27,277
Ever seen one of these?
236
00:21:30,822 --> 00:21:33,241
She looks over to her husband...
237
00:21:33,491 --> 00:21:36,578
...then sets it down in her lap
and says:
238
00:21:36,786 --> 00:21:39,998
" Honey, this one's eating my popcorn."
239
00:21:43,293 --> 00:21:44,335
Get it?
240
00:21:44,586 --> 00:21:45,920
This one's eating...
241
00:21:48,298 --> 00:21:50,425
Gotta go.
Thanks for the egg rolls.
242
00:21:50,675 --> 00:21:51,968
Wait a minute.
243
00:21:52,260 --> 00:21:53,094
Who are you?
244
00:21:53,344 --> 00:21:55,930
See what I mean about tequila?
You're very bright.
245
00:21:56,181 --> 00:21:57,932
But you need to lay off the sauce.
246
00:21:58,183 --> 00:22:00,435
I'll see you bright and early, 9:00.
247
00:22:00,685 --> 00:22:01,519
Be there...
248
00:22:02,312 --> 00:22:03,855
...or be square.
249
00:22:25,084 --> 00:22:26,628
Well, well, well.
250
00:22:26,878 --> 00:22:30,173
Moving right in, are we?
Think we own the place?
251
00:22:30,381 --> 00:22:32,300
I got an eviction notice for you.
252
00:22:32,550 --> 00:22:35,345
Just what exactly
do you think you're doing here?
253
00:22:35,595 --> 00:22:37,639
Taking care of your pest problem.
254
00:22:37,889 --> 00:22:39,223
Pest problem?
255
00:22:40,099 --> 00:22:41,309
Pest?
256
00:22:41,517 --> 00:22:43,519
You got a hell of an infestation.
257
00:22:43,728 --> 00:22:46,564
You know, I've noticed
an infestation here.
258
00:22:46,773 --> 00:22:49,567
Everywhere I look, nothing but
undeveloped, unevolved...
259
00:22:49,817 --> 00:22:52,320
...barely conscious pond scum...
260
00:22:52,528 --> 00:22:55,198
...totally convinced
of their own superiority...
261
00:22:55,448 --> 00:22:57,533
...as they scurry about their short...
262
00:22:57,784 --> 00:22:59,535
...pointless lives.
263
00:23:02,538 --> 00:23:04,374
Don't you wanna get rid of them?
264
00:23:04,624 --> 00:23:06,334
In the worst way.
265
00:23:42,161 --> 00:23:43,579
Help you?
266
00:23:43,955 --> 00:23:45,873
This dude gave me this card...
267
00:23:46,123 --> 00:23:47,416
Elevator.
268
00:24:12,149 --> 00:24:14,402
You're late. Sit down.
269
00:24:21,409 --> 00:24:22,868
My name is Zed.
270
00:24:23,285 --> 00:24:25,913
You're all here
because you're the best.
271
00:24:26,122 --> 00:24:30,709
Marines, Air Force, Navy SEALs,
Army Rangers, NYPD.
272
00:24:31,085 --> 00:24:32,253
We want one of you.
273
00:24:32,795 --> 00:24:33,921
Just one.
274
00:24:34,171 --> 00:24:36,924
What will follow is
a series of simple tests...
275
00:24:37,174 --> 00:24:40,719
...for motor skills,
concentration, stamina.
276
00:24:41,470 --> 00:24:42,888
I see we have a question.
277
00:24:43,139 --> 00:24:46,725
I'm sorry, maybe you
already answered this but...
278
00:24:46,976 --> 00:24:48,394
...why are we here?
279
00:24:48,644 --> 00:24:49,645
Son.
280
00:24:50,145 --> 00:24:53,065
Lieutenant Jensen.
West Point graduate with honours.
281
00:24:53,315 --> 00:24:56,944
We're here because you want
the best of the best of the best, sir!
282
00:25:02,533 --> 00:25:04,368
What's so funny, Edwards?
283
00:25:04,743 --> 00:25:06,829
Your boy, Captain America, here.
284
00:25:07,454 --> 00:25:09,999
"The best of the best
of the best, sir!"
285
00:25:10,332 --> 00:25:11,166
"With honours."
286
00:25:12,001 --> 00:25:13,627
He's just really excited...
287
00:25:13,836 --> 00:25:15,921
...and has no clue why we're here.
288
00:25:16,171 --> 00:25:18,590
That's just very funny to me.
289
00:25:20,009 --> 00:25:21,677
Y'all ain't laughing, though.
290
00:25:29,518 --> 00:25:31,437
Okay, let's get going.
291
00:26:56,063 --> 00:26:57,314
Wanna get down on this?
292
00:27:23,256 --> 00:27:24,925
Edwards, what happened?
293
00:27:25,967 --> 00:27:26,801
Hesitated.
294
00:27:29,638 --> 00:27:33,350
May I ask why you felt
little Tiffany deserved to die?
295
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:35,977
She was the only one
that seemed dangerous.
296
00:27:36,186 --> 00:27:37,604
How'd you figure that?
297
00:27:37,812 --> 00:27:40,523
I was gonna pop this guy
hanging from the light...
298
00:27:40,774 --> 00:27:42,359
...but he's just working out.
299
00:27:42,651 --> 00:27:46,321
How'd I feel if somebody bust
my ass while I'm on the treadmill?
300
00:27:46,571 --> 00:27:48,448
Then I saw this snarling beast.
301
00:27:48,698 --> 00:27:51,743
I noticed he had a tissue
in his hand and realized...
302
00:27:51,993 --> 00:27:54,037
...he's not snarling,
he's sneezing.
303
00:27:54,287 --> 00:27:55,622
Ain't no threat there.
304
00:27:55,872 --> 00:27:56,957
Then I saw Tiffany.
305
00:27:57,207 --> 00:28:00,126
8-year-old white girl,
middle of the ghetto...
306
00:28:00,377 --> 00:28:03,213
...bunch of monsters at night
with quantum physics books?
307
00:28:03,505 --> 00:28:05,298
She about to start some shit.
308
00:28:05,507 --> 00:28:08,051
Those books are
way too advanced for her.
309
00:28:08,301 --> 00:28:10,679
If you ask me, she's up to something.
310
00:28:10,970 --> 00:28:13,682
I'd appreciate it if you
eased up about it.
311
00:28:17,852 --> 00:28:19,854
Or do I owe her an apology?
312
00:28:27,487 --> 00:28:28,905
Good shot, though, right?
313
00:28:34,452 --> 00:28:36,371
He has a problem with authority.
314
00:28:36,621 --> 00:28:37,914
So do I.
315
00:28:38,206 --> 00:28:41,376
But this kid ran down
a cephalopoid on foot, boss.
316
00:28:41,626 --> 00:28:43,461
That's gotta be tough enough.
317
00:28:44,587 --> 00:28:46,798
Let's hope you know what you're doing.
318
00:28:55,223 --> 00:28:57,392
Gentlemen, congratulations.
319
00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:01,145
You're everything we expect
from years of government training.
320
00:29:01,354 --> 00:29:04,983
If you'll just follow me,
we have one more test to administer.
321
00:29:05,191 --> 00:29:06,859
An eye exam.
322
00:29:19,789 --> 00:29:21,082
Where are you going?
323
00:29:22,917 --> 00:29:24,419
What the hell is all this?
324
00:29:24,669 --> 00:29:27,797
In the 1950s, the government
started an underfunded agency...
325
00:29:28,047 --> 00:29:30,800
...with the laughable purpose
of establishing contact...
326
00:29:31,009 --> 00:29:32,802
...with a race not of this planet.
327
00:29:33,011 --> 00:29:35,179
Look at the end of this device.
328
00:29:35,513 --> 00:29:38,433
Everyone thought the agency
was a joke, except the aliens...
329
00:29:38,683 --> 00:29:41,769
...who made contact on March 2, 1961
outside New York.
330
00:29:42,019 --> 00:29:46,065
There were nine of us the first night.
Seven agents, one astronomer...
331
00:29:46,274 --> 00:29:48,443
...and a dumb kid who'd gotten lost.
332
00:29:48,693 --> 00:29:51,529
You brought that tall man some flowers.
333
00:29:52,155 --> 00:29:53,322
This way.
334
00:29:54,449 --> 00:29:56,784
They were a group
of intergalactic refugees.
335
00:29:57,034 --> 00:30:00,663
Wanted Earth as an apolitical zone
for creatures without a planet.
336
00:30:00,913 --> 00:30:02,456
You ever see Casablanca?
337
00:30:02,707 --> 00:30:04,375
Same thing, except no Nazis.
338
00:30:04,584 --> 00:30:07,920
We agreed and concealed
all evidence of their landing.
339
00:30:08,880 --> 00:30:13,009
So these are real flying saucers
and the World's Fair was a cover-up?
340
00:30:13,301 --> 00:30:14,427
Why hold it in Queens?
341
00:30:14,677 --> 00:30:17,597
More nonhumans arrive every year
and live among us in secret.
342
00:30:17,847 --> 00:30:22,602
Not to change the subject, but when
was the last time you got a CAT scan?
343
00:30:22,852 --> 00:30:26,522
- Six months ago. It's company policy.
- Make another appointment.
344
00:30:26,772 --> 00:30:29,984
Tell your boy Zed I had
an absolutely wonderful time...
345
00:30:30,234 --> 00:30:33,279
...and thank you for everything,
but show me the door.
346
00:30:33,529 --> 00:30:36,616
All right. I'm getting some coffee.
You want some?
347
00:30:36,866 --> 00:30:38,659
No, thank you, I'm fine.
348
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:45,082
How you doing?
349
00:30:45,333 --> 00:30:46,500
Hi, Kay.
350
00:30:47,710 --> 00:30:50,212
- That's not decaf, is it?
- Viennese cinnamon.
351
00:30:50,629 --> 00:30:54,550
Don't tell me we only got powdered
stuff for cream. I hate it.
352
00:30:56,510 --> 00:30:58,721
Well, that's good. Good. Good.
353
00:30:59,597 --> 00:31:01,307
You guys getting along all right?
354
00:31:02,933 --> 00:31:04,435
Don't work too hard.
355
00:31:08,272 --> 00:31:10,274
Sure you don't want some coffee?
356
00:31:16,739 --> 00:31:18,240
Here's the deal.
357
00:31:18,491 --> 00:31:21,827
At any given time, there are
around 1500 aliens on the planet.
358
00:31:22,077 --> 00:31:24,038
Most of them here in Manhattan.
359
00:31:24,288 --> 00:31:27,166
Most of them are decent.
Just trying to make a living.
360
00:31:27,416 --> 00:31:29,877
- Cab drivers?
- Not as many as you'd think.
361
00:31:30,377 --> 00:31:33,505
Humans, for the most part,
don't have a clue. Don't want one.
362
00:31:33,756 --> 00:31:38,219
They're happy. They think
they have a good bead on things.
363
00:31:39,094 --> 00:31:41,597
People are smart.
They can handle it.
364
00:31:41,931 --> 00:31:42,973
A person is smart.
365
00:31:43,307 --> 00:31:47,061
People are dumb, panicky,
dangerous animals, and you know it.
366
00:31:47,436 --> 00:31:50,564
1500 years ago, everybody knew
the Earth was...
367
00:31:50,814 --> 00:31:52,524
...the centre of the universe.
368
00:31:52,775 --> 00:31:56,111
500 years ago, everybody knew
the Earth was flat.
369
00:31:56,362 --> 00:32:00,407
And 15 minutes ago, you knew that
people were alone on this planet.
370
00:32:02,493 --> 00:32:04,536
Imagine what you'll know...
371
00:32:04,745 --> 00:32:05,913
...tomorrow.
372
00:32:08,332 --> 00:32:10,542
- What's the catch?
- The catch?
373
00:32:11,126 --> 00:32:13,629
The catch is, you will sever
all human contact.
374
00:32:13,879 --> 00:32:16,965
Nobody will ever know
you exist anywhere...
375
00:32:18,884 --> 00:32:19,927
...ever.
376
00:32:23,263 --> 00:32:25,766
I'll give you to sunrise
to think it over.
377
00:32:30,896 --> 00:32:32,231
Is it worth it?
378
00:32:32,481 --> 00:32:33,857
Yeah, it's worth it.
379
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:37,986
If you're strong enough.
380
00:33:38,213 --> 00:33:39,589
What's up, pops?
381
00:33:50,183 --> 00:33:51,143
I'm in...
382
00:33:51,351 --> 00:33:54,688
...because there's some
next-level shit going on here.
383
00:33:54,896 --> 00:33:58,150
Before y'all beam me up,
there's a few things to understand.
384
00:33:58,400 --> 00:34:02,154
First off, you chose me,
so you recognize the skills.
385
00:34:02,404 --> 00:34:06,032
I don't want nobody calling me
"son" or " kid" or "sport." Cool?
386
00:34:06,283 --> 00:34:07,534
Cool. Whatever, slick.
387
00:34:07,742 --> 00:34:10,996
But I need to tell you something
about all your skills.
388
00:34:12,289 --> 00:34:13,206
As of right now,
they mean precisely...
389
00:34:13,206 --> 00:34:15,542
As of right now,
they mean precisely...
390
00:34:15,959 --> 00:34:17,252
...dick.
391
00:34:30,473 --> 00:34:32,976
- Purpose of trip?
- Diplomatic mission.
392
00:34:33,226 --> 00:34:34,144
Duration of stay?
393
00:34:34,394 --> 00:34:35,687
Lunch.
394
00:34:35,937 --> 00:34:37,772
Any fruits or vegetables?
395
00:34:50,285 --> 00:34:52,746
You wanna stay away from that guy.
396
00:34:53,955 --> 00:34:55,373
He's grouchy.
397
00:34:55,790 --> 00:34:58,752
Three hours in customs
after a 17-trillion-mile trip...
398
00:34:58,960 --> 00:35:00,462
...will make anyone cranky.
399
00:35:00,670 --> 00:35:02,589
What government branch
do we report to?
400
00:35:02,839 --> 00:35:05,425
- None. They ask too many questions.
- Who pays for this?
401
00:35:05,633 --> 00:35:10,096
We hold patents on a few gadgets we
confiscated from out-of-state visitors.
402
00:35:10,346 --> 00:35:12,515
Velcro, microwave ovens, liposuction.
403
00:35:12,724 --> 00:35:14,601
This is a fascinating gadget.
404
00:35:15,143 --> 00:35:18,688
It'll replace CDs soon. I'll have to
buy the White Album again.
405
00:35:18,938 --> 00:35:23,067
That's fun. A universal translator.
We're not even supposed to have it.
406
00:35:23,318 --> 00:35:25,904
Human thought is so primitive.
It's looked upon...
407
00:35:26,154 --> 00:35:28,698
...as an infectious disease
in some galaxies.
408
00:35:28,948 --> 00:35:30,783
That kind of makes you proud.
409
00:35:31,034 --> 00:35:32,118
What's this?
410
00:35:35,955 --> 00:35:37,207
Just be calm!
411
00:35:37,457 --> 00:35:38,499
Relax!
412
00:35:39,208 --> 00:35:40,543
Watch your head!
413
00:35:41,044 --> 00:35:42,754
Someone get him some ice!
414
00:35:43,588 --> 00:35:46,716
Look out! Move! Just move
when it's coming at you!
415
00:35:52,930 --> 00:35:53,765
Damn!
416
00:35:54,515 --> 00:35:56,100
I'll pay for that!
417
00:36:07,403 --> 00:36:10,531
This thing caused
the 1977 New York blackout.
418
00:36:11,491 --> 00:36:13,618
Practical joke
by the Great Attractor.
419
00:36:13,868 --> 00:36:15,495
He thought it was funny.
420
00:36:16,871 --> 00:36:18,164
Sorry, y'all.
421
00:36:18,831 --> 00:36:20,958
It was a accident. Sorry.
422
00:36:21,501 --> 00:36:23,586
Observation,
the heart of our endeavour.
423
00:36:23,836 --> 00:36:26,005
Meet the twins, Blblup and Bob.
424
00:36:26,255 --> 00:36:29,592
This map shows the location
of every alien on Earth.
425
00:36:29,842 --> 00:36:31,844
Some are under constant surveillance.
426
00:36:32,220 --> 00:36:34,305
Everyone on those screens is an alien.
427
00:36:34,555 --> 00:36:37,433
In public, they're as normal
as you are, but in private...
428
00:36:38,017 --> 00:36:39,018
You'll get the idea.
429
00:36:40,228 --> 00:36:41,604
Oh, man.
430
00:36:42,063 --> 00:36:43,689
Doesn't make any sense, right?
431
00:36:44,899 --> 00:36:47,568
Well, no, it makes perfect sense.
432
00:36:48,110 --> 00:36:51,405
In third grade, everyone said
I was crazy, but I knew our teacher...
433
00:36:51,614 --> 00:36:53,866
...had to be from Venus or something.
434
00:36:54,075 --> 00:36:56,827
Ms. Edelson. Jupiter, actually.
Well, one of the moons.
435
00:36:58,246 --> 00:36:59,121
...revolve.
436
00:36:59,372 --> 00:37:00,706
Class...
437
00:37:01,165 --> 00:37:03,542
...be quiet and pay attention!
438
00:37:04,502 --> 00:37:06,128
If I have to tell you...
439
00:37:06,337 --> 00:37:08,714
...one more time...
440
00:37:10,424 --> 00:37:11,634
Let's put it on.
441
00:37:12,468 --> 00:37:13,302
Put what on?
442
00:37:13,928 --> 00:37:16,430
The last suit you'll ever wear.
443
00:37:28,943 --> 00:37:31,654
You will dress only in attire
specially sanctioned...
444
00:37:31,904 --> 00:37:33,906
... by MiB Special Services.
445
00:37:34,407 --> 00:37:37,201
You'll conform to
the identity we give you...
446
00:37:37,451 --> 00:37:40,246
... eat where we tell you,
live where we tell you.
447
00:37:40,871 --> 00:37:41,831
From now on...
448
00:37:42,081 --> 00:37:44,583
... you'll have no identifying
marks of any kind.
449
00:37:44,834 --> 00:37:47,461
You will not stand out in any way.
450
00:37:47,878 --> 00:37:49,755
Your entire image is crafted...
451
00:37:50,005 --> 00:37:52,925
... to leave no lasting memory
with anyone you meet.
452
00:37:53,259 --> 00:37:55,678
You are a rumour,
recognizable only as...
453
00:37:55,886 --> 00:37:58,764
... déjà vu and dismissed
just as quickly.
454
00:37:59,014 --> 00:38:01,350
You don't exist.
You were never born.
455
00:38:04,103 --> 00:38:06,063
Anonymity is your name.
456
00:38:06,313 --> 00:38:08,190
Silence, your native tongue.
457
00:38:08,983 --> 00:38:11,277
You're no longer part of the system.
458
00:38:11,485 --> 00:38:13,654
You are above the system. Over it.
459
00:38:14,154 --> 00:38:15,698
Beyond it.
460
00:38:16,865 --> 00:38:19,034
We're "them. " We're "they. "
461
00:38:19,410 --> 00:38:21,870
We are the Men in Black.
462
00:38:29,211 --> 00:38:32,298
You know what the difference is
between you and me?
463
00:38:34,842 --> 00:38:36,802
I make this look good.
464
00:38:38,971 --> 00:38:40,931
We're gonna go for a little ride.
465
00:38:41,348 --> 00:38:45,019
I'll put you down here for a minute,
and Daddy will be right back.
466
00:39:16,467 --> 00:39:19,344
Okay, now we're ready to go
for a little ride.
467
00:39:19,595 --> 00:39:23,182
We'll meet one of Daddy's friends,
and you'll like him.
468
00:39:26,226 --> 00:39:28,187
Okay, let's see.
469
00:39:28,854 --> 00:39:32,316
Bee, we got the deposed sur-prefect
of Singalee...
470
00:39:32,566 --> 00:39:35,485
...touching down in the forest
outside Portland tonight.
471
00:39:35,736 --> 00:39:38,363
-Humanoid?
- You wish. Bring a sponge.
472
00:39:39,573 --> 00:39:41,658
Here. Red letter from last night.
473
00:39:42,367 --> 00:39:45,329
We had an unauthorized landing
in upstate New York.
474
00:39:45,579 --> 00:39:47,581
Keep your ears open
on this one.
475
00:39:47,789 --> 00:39:51,209
We're not hosting an
intergalactic kegger down here.
476
00:39:53,086 --> 00:39:54,546
We got a skimmer.
477
00:39:54,921 --> 00:39:56,840
Landed alien out of zone.
Who is it?
478
00:39:57,090 --> 00:39:58,133
Redgick.
479
00:39:58,383 --> 00:40:01,386
He's not cleared to leave Manhattan,
but he's out of town...
480
00:40:01,636 --> 00:40:03,680
...stuck on the New Jersey turnpike.
481
00:40:03,930 --> 00:40:05,640
Take junior with you.
482
00:40:05,891 --> 00:40:08,685
This is a good one
for him to warm up on.
483
00:40:09,269 --> 00:40:10,270
Go get him, tiger.
484
00:40:17,235 --> 00:40:19,905
"We're not hosting
an intergalactic kegger."
485
00:40:21,239 --> 00:40:22,449
Zed...
486
00:40:23,408 --> 00:40:24,576
He just...
487
00:40:26,161 --> 00:40:30,123
Unlimited technology from the
whole universe, and we cruise around...
488
00:40:30,332 --> 00:40:31,792
...in a Ford POS.
489
00:40:34,336 --> 00:40:36,171
Fasten your seat belt.
490
00:40:36,421 --> 00:40:38,256
We gotta work on your people skills.
491
00:40:38,507 --> 00:40:41,218
You'd get a better reaction
if you were polite.
492
00:40:41,468 --> 00:40:43,094
Fasten your seat belt, please.
493
00:40:43,303 --> 00:40:44,930
Good. Did you hurt yourself?
494
00:40:48,767 --> 00:40:52,437
The red button there, kid.
Don't ever touch the red button.
495
00:41:02,447 --> 00:41:05,116
All right, pop,
that'll be $72 there.
496
00:41:05,742 --> 00:41:08,954
Okay, sweetie, let me pay
the impolite driver.
497
00:41:38,733 --> 00:41:42,987
Sorry I'm late. The cab drivers
on this planet are terrible.
498
00:41:43,238 --> 00:41:45,615
Your Majesty,
you are in grave danger.
499
00:41:45,865 --> 00:41:48,868
Yeah, and they overcharge
you every time.
500
00:41:49,119 --> 00:41:52,956
Sir, a bug landed here.
We must get you off the planet.
501
00:41:53,206 --> 00:41:55,416
A bug? He must know
why I'm here.
502
00:41:55,667 --> 00:41:57,168
We think he does.
503
00:41:58,711 --> 00:42:00,463
Is that what I think it is?
504
00:42:00,713 --> 00:42:03,216
No, just some diamonds
for your children.
505
00:42:03,466 --> 00:42:04,676
Do we have time to eat?
506
00:42:05,468 --> 00:42:08,846
Sure. I ordered you
some Pirogi.
507
00:42:12,058 --> 00:42:13,560
Six is up!
508
00:42:14,894 --> 00:42:15,937
Where is lvan?
509
00:42:16,187 --> 00:42:17,689
Gave him a break.
510
00:42:28,366 --> 00:42:31,411
To the continued reign of
the Arquillian Empire.
511
00:42:31,661 --> 00:42:33,621
To the safety of the Galaxy.
512
00:42:40,920 --> 00:42:43,965
You can kill us both,
but you will not find the Galaxy.
513
00:42:44,924 --> 00:42:47,093
You're right about one thing.
514
00:43:01,482 --> 00:43:03,109
You're not going anywhere.
515
00:43:20,126 --> 00:43:22,295
Your licence and registration, please.
516
00:43:26,007 --> 00:43:29,135
Like to see your other licence
and registration, please.
517
00:43:36,142 --> 00:43:39,979
You're restricted to Manhattan.
Where are you going, Redgie?
518
00:43:40,771 --> 00:43:43,316
It's my wife. She's...
Well, look.
519
00:43:48,112 --> 00:43:49,280
No big deal.
520
00:43:49,530 --> 00:43:51,657
Okay, you come with me, Redge.
521
00:43:53,826 --> 00:43:55,911
And you handle this.
522
00:43:56,162 --> 00:43:57,038
What?! Me?
523
00:43:57,788 --> 00:44:00,166
- You just catch.
- Does he know what he's doing?
524
00:44:00,374 --> 00:44:02,460
He does it all the time.
Let him work.
525
00:44:11,177 --> 00:44:12,928
Damn, man!
526
00:44:13,763 --> 00:44:16,432
Something's peeking!
527
00:44:16,682 --> 00:44:18,642
You're headed out of town.
528
00:44:18,893 --> 00:44:21,187
- We're meeting someone.
- Who?
529
00:44:21,437 --> 00:44:24,440
- It's a ship.
- I saw no departure clearance.
530
00:44:24,690 --> 00:44:25,566
You didn't?
531
00:44:25,816 --> 00:44:28,068
It's an emergency.
532
00:44:28,652 --> 00:44:29,987
You're doing fine!
533
00:44:30,196 --> 00:44:34,325
What kind of emergency?
What's the rush to get off the planet?
534
00:44:34,658 --> 00:44:36,827
We don't like
the neighbourhood anymore.
535
00:44:37,077 --> 00:44:38,913
Some of the new arrivals...
536
00:44:39,163 --> 00:44:42,500
New arrivals? Have anything to do
with the crasher last night?
537
00:44:42,708 --> 00:44:44,084
Excuse me, miss!
538
00:44:47,755 --> 00:44:49,215
Oh, man.
539
00:44:49,798 --> 00:44:51,508
Oh, man!
540
00:44:53,552 --> 00:44:54,470
Look.
541
00:44:54,720 --> 00:44:56,513
Oh, man!
542
00:44:58,057 --> 00:45:00,225
Congratulations, Redge.
It's a...
543
00:45:01,101 --> 00:45:02,478
...squid.
544
00:45:05,856 --> 00:45:06,774
You know, it's...
545
00:45:07,775 --> 00:45:09,693
...actually kind of...
546
00:45:16,033 --> 00:45:17,201
...cute.
547
00:45:25,084 --> 00:45:27,252
Anything about that seem unusual?
548
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:31,465
What would scare Redgick so badly...
549
00:45:31,715 --> 00:45:34,176
...that he'd risk a warp jump
with a newborn?
550
00:45:34,635 --> 00:45:36,553
We'll check the hot sheets.
551
00:45:42,184 --> 00:45:43,393
These are " hot sheets"?
552
00:45:43,602 --> 00:45:45,646
Best investigative reporting on Earth.
553
00:45:45,896 --> 00:45:48,982
Read The New York Times if you want.
They get lucky sometimes.
554
00:45:49,358 --> 00:45:53,070
Cannot believe you're looking for tips
in the supermarket tabloids.
555
00:45:54,571 --> 00:45:56,073
Not " looking for."
556
00:45:56,949 --> 00:45:59,618
Found.
557
00:46:12,339 --> 00:46:14,716
- Wait a minute, slow down.
- Why?
558
00:46:14,967 --> 00:46:18,178
Give her time to get the wrong
impression. Makes it smoother.
559
00:46:19,304 --> 00:46:20,722
Can I help you?
560
00:46:20,973 --> 00:46:24,268
Yes, ma'am. I'm Agent Manheim,
this is Agent Black, FBI.
561
00:46:24,518 --> 00:46:26,228
We'd like to talk about your visitor.
562
00:46:26,478 --> 00:46:27,896
Gonna make fun of me too?
563
00:46:28,146 --> 00:46:32,234
No, we do not have a sense of humour
we're aware of. May we come in?
564
00:46:33,986 --> 00:46:34,861
Sure.
565
00:46:35,320 --> 00:46:36,530
- Thank you.
- Lemonade?
566
00:46:36,780 --> 00:46:38,198
Oh, yes, please.
567
00:46:42,828 --> 00:46:45,247
The chief of police came
to the house...
568
00:46:45,497 --> 00:46:47,457
...and did an investigation.
569
00:46:47,958 --> 00:46:51,086
Took a police report and writ down
everything I said...
570
00:46:51,336 --> 00:46:53,130
...not believing one thing I said.
571
00:46:53,380 --> 00:46:55,090
Sort of poking fun at me.
572
00:46:55,340 --> 00:46:57,426
He asked me, " If he was murdered...
573
00:46:57,676 --> 00:47:00,095
...how was he able to walk
back in the house?"
574
00:47:00,345 --> 00:47:03,181
I gotta admit to you that
that one got me stumped.
575
00:47:03,598 --> 00:47:06,143
I tell you, I know Edgar,
and that wasn't Edgar.
576
00:47:07,686 --> 00:47:10,647
It was like something was
wearing Edgar.
577
00:47:12,649 --> 00:47:13,900
Like a suit...
578
00:47:14,526 --> 00:47:15,944
...an Edgar suit.
579
00:47:23,535 --> 00:47:26,246
Dude was that ugly
before he was an alien.
580
00:47:29,165 --> 00:47:31,001
I'm sorry.
581
00:47:31,376 --> 00:47:32,419
Go on.
582
00:47:33,420 --> 00:47:34,588
Anyway...
583
00:47:34,838 --> 00:47:36,881
...I come to and he's gone.
584
00:47:37,924 --> 00:47:38,883
He say anything?
585
00:47:39,217 --> 00:47:42,053
Yes. He asked me for some water.
586
00:47:42,679 --> 00:47:44,514
Some sugar water.
587
00:47:44,889 --> 00:47:45,974
Sugar water?
588
00:47:46,224 --> 00:47:49,227
I remember that right.
I thought that that was odd...
589
00:47:49,602 --> 00:47:53,690
...that he asked me for sugar water
and not lemonade or ice water...
590
00:47:54,107 --> 00:47:55,358
...or regular water...
591
00:47:55,608 --> 00:47:56,860
...tap water.
592
00:47:57,944 --> 00:48:00,613
All right, Beatrice.
There was no alien.
593
00:48:00,864 --> 00:48:03,158
The flash of light was not a U.F.O.
594
00:48:03,408 --> 00:48:07,704
Gas was trapped in a thermal pocket
and refracted the light from Venus.
595
00:48:07,954 --> 00:48:09,205
Wait a minute.
596
00:48:09,456 --> 00:48:12,876
That thing erases her memory,
and you just make up a new one?
597
00:48:13,126 --> 00:48:14,753
A standard-issue neuralizer.
598
00:48:15,003 --> 00:48:17,714
That weak-ass story is
the best you came up with?
599
00:48:18,047 --> 00:48:20,592
All right. On a more personal note...
600
00:48:20,842 --> 00:48:24,846
...Edgar ran off with an old girlfriend.
You'll stay with your mama...
601
00:48:25,096 --> 00:48:26,473
...and decide you're better off.
602
00:48:26,723 --> 00:48:30,393
Yeah, because he never
appreciated you anyway.
603
00:48:30,977 --> 00:48:32,896
In fact, you know what?
604
00:48:33,146 --> 00:48:35,857
You kicked him out.
And now that he's gone...
605
00:48:36,107 --> 00:48:39,235
...you'll go in town,
find yourself some nice dresses.
606
00:48:39,485 --> 00:48:43,531
Get yourself some shoes.
Find somewhere you could get a facial.
607
00:48:45,116 --> 00:48:48,411
And hire a decorator to come
in here quick because... damn!
608
00:48:56,544 --> 00:48:58,338
When do I get my own flashy...
609
00:48:58,588 --> 00:48:59,964
...memory messer-upper?
610
00:49:00,214 --> 00:49:01,215
When you grow up.
611
00:49:05,345 --> 00:49:06,304
Please. Not green.
612
00:49:07,805 --> 00:49:08,765
Oh, damn!
613
00:49:10,516 --> 00:49:13,353
Do you know which alien leaves
a green spectral trail...
614
00:49:13,603 --> 00:49:14,937
...and craves sugar water?
615
00:49:15,938 --> 00:49:19,776
That was on Jeopardy last night.
Damn, Alex said it was...
616
00:49:20,026 --> 00:49:21,861
Zed, we have a bug.
617
00:49:22,570 --> 00:49:25,323
So...
What? We don't like bugs?
618
00:49:25,573 --> 00:49:27,742
Bugs thrive on carnage, tiger.
619
00:49:28,201 --> 00:49:32,538
They consume, infest, destroy,
live off the death of other species.
620
00:49:32,789 --> 00:49:34,832
You were stung as a child, right?
621
00:49:35,458 --> 00:49:39,087
Imagine a giant cockroach
with unlimited strength...
622
00:49:39,337 --> 00:49:42,924
...a massive inferiority complex,
and a real short temper...
623
00:49:43,132 --> 00:49:46,427
...is terrorizing Manhattan Island
in a new Edgar suit.
624
00:49:47,595 --> 00:49:48,721
That sound like fun?
625
00:49:51,140 --> 00:49:52,225
What's the move?
626
00:49:53,392 --> 00:49:55,853
With a bug in town,
we'll watch the morgues.
627
00:50:08,199 --> 00:50:10,034
Where do you want
contestant number 3?
628
00:50:10,243 --> 00:50:11,744
Just leave it there.
629
00:50:11,994 --> 00:50:13,079
What's with the cat?
630
00:50:13,329 --> 00:50:16,374
There's a problem with the cat.
Sign here.
631
00:50:16,624 --> 00:50:19,418
- What's the problem with the cat?
- It's your problem.
632
00:50:22,755 --> 00:50:24,298
I hate the living.
633
00:50:26,300 --> 00:50:27,677
Shall we?
634
00:50:57,331 --> 00:50:59,208
Oh, my God!
635
00:51:03,295 --> 00:51:05,297
Buddy, what are you?
636
00:51:13,681 --> 00:51:16,934
Subject was approximately 112 degrees
at time of autopsy...
637
00:51:17,184 --> 00:51:19,353
...indicating a temperature increase.
638
00:51:19,603 --> 00:51:23,732
Examiner tried to verify this rectally,
but the subject had no rectum.
639
00:51:23,983 --> 00:51:25,401
Which is really...
640
00:51:25,651 --> 00:51:26,527
Weird.
641
00:51:27,403 --> 00:51:31,574
I'm Dr. Leo Manville, Department
of Public Health. This is Dr. White.
642
00:51:32,616 --> 00:51:34,660
You must not have a home life.
643
00:51:34,868 --> 00:51:38,122
We watch the morgues carefully.
You have something unusual?
644
00:51:38,372 --> 00:51:40,666
I'd say so. Triple homicide.
645
00:51:40,916 --> 00:51:42,793
The first body was normal,
except he was broken in half.
646
00:51:42,793 --> 00:51:44,086
The first body was normal,
except he was broken in half.
647
00:51:44,336 --> 00:51:46,839
But when I opened up
the other two, well...
648
00:51:47,089 --> 00:51:48,048
Let me show you.
649
00:51:54,972 --> 00:51:58,100
There's a skeletal structure
unlike anything I've seen.
650
00:51:58,350 --> 00:51:59,810
I'll have a look at it.
651
00:52:00,019 --> 00:52:02,229
You and Dr. Weaver
check the other body.
652
00:52:02,438 --> 00:52:03,814
This way, doctor.
653
00:52:04,523 --> 00:52:06,400
This one's even stranger.
654
00:52:07,317 --> 00:52:09,987
I did a laparotomy.
I started with the stomach.
655
00:52:10,237 --> 00:52:13,699
But we can start with the
gastroesophageal junction.
656
00:52:14,825 --> 00:52:17,745
Let's start wherever you started at.
657
00:52:18,203 --> 00:52:19,538
Okey-dokey.
658
00:52:28,255 --> 00:52:29,840
- Is this your cat?
- It is now.
659
00:52:30,048 --> 00:52:32,426
It came in with the body.
Dive right in.
660
00:52:32,634 --> 00:52:34,344
I'm sure he won't mind.
661
00:52:37,973 --> 00:52:39,850
You have really pretty eyes.
662
00:52:40,851 --> 00:52:41,852
Thank you.
663
00:52:45,689 --> 00:52:46,607
Feel that?
664
00:52:46,815 --> 00:52:49,860
Where the pyloric junction would be?
Push it aside.
665
00:52:50,360 --> 00:52:53,363
Notice anything strange?
Stomach, liver, lungs...
666
00:52:53,780 --> 00:52:55,657
Nope, all fine.
667
00:52:55,908 --> 00:52:57,409
They're all missing.
668
00:52:58,160 --> 00:52:59,036
Of course.
669
00:52:59,286 --> 00:53:02,247
That's obviously
the first thing I noticed.
670
00:53:02,789 --> 00:53:05,792
What I was pointing out
is the fact that there are no...
671
00:53:06,960 --> 00:53:08,295
...pieces...
672
00:53:08,545 --> 00:53:10,047
...of them left.
673
00:53:10,297 --> 00:53:13,342
You know, so they're intact...
674
00:53:13,800 --> 00:53:16,928
...wherever they are whole.
That we can be sure of.
675
00:53:17,137 --> 00:53:18,555
Have we met before?
676
00:53:19,389 --> 00:53:21,475
I'm having a feeling of déjà vu.
677
00:53:22,976 --> 00:53:25,312
- Yeah, me too.
- Really?
678
00:53:26,104 --> 00:53:28,565
Wanna know what I think?
Don't tell him.
679
00:53:28,815 --> 00:53:32,152
He's under enough stress.
I don't think it's a real body.
680
00:53:32,402 --> 00:53:35,739
I think it's some kind of
transport unit for something else.
681
00:53:35,989 --> 00:53:37,824
The question is, what?
682
00:53:38,700 --> 00:53:40,243
Is this freaking you out?
683
00:53:43,246 --> 00:53:44,456
No, girl.
684
00:53:46,041 --> 00:53:49,002
You know what I like to do sometimes
when it's late?
685
00:53:53,340 --> 00:53:54,674
Dr. White.
686
00:53:56,426 --> 00:53:57,761
Excuse me.
687
00:54:02,474 --> 00:54:03,642
What do you think?
688
00:54:04,184 --> 00:54:07,395
Interesting. She got
a "Queen of the Undead" thing going...
689
00:54:07,646 --> 00:54:08,939
Of the body.
690
00:54:09,147 --> 00:54:09,981
Great body.
691
00:54:10,190 --> 00:54:11,900
The dead body.
692
00:54:12,692 --> 00:54:14,653
You have to look at that thing.
693
00:54:14,986 --> 00:54:16,404
You recognize him?
694
00:54:17,113 --> 00:54:20,617
He looks like the big guy I saw
at headquarters, only deader.
695
00:54:20,867 --> 00:54:22,202
What killed him?
696
00:54:23,495 --> 00:54:24,454
A bug?
697
00:54:25,330 --> 00:54:26,623
You're up, slugger.
698
00:54:30,669 --> 00:54:31,878
Look at this.
699
00:54:33,672 --> 00:54:35,090
What the hell is that?
700
00:54:53,650 --> 00:54:55,068
Must...
701
00:54:56,736 --> 00:54:58,696
To prevent...
702
00:55:01,157 --> 00:55:03,076
...contest.
703
00:55:04,119 --> 00:55:05,578
What are you saying?
704
00:55:05,829 --> 00:55:07,247
To prevent...
705
00:55:07,497 --> 00:55:08,998
To prevent...
706
00:55:09,290 --> 00:55:10,333
...struggle?
707
00:55:12,752 --> 00:55:13,795
To prevent...
708
00:55:14,337 --> 00:55:15,255
War?
709
00:55:15,630 --> 00:55:16,840
War.
710
00:55:19,425 --> 00:55:20,969
The Galaxy...
711
00:55:22,345 --> 00:55:24,097
...is on...
712
00:55:24,514 --> 00:55:26,432
...Orion's...
713
00:55:28,935 --> 00:55:29,769
...be...
714
00:55:32,689 --> 00:55:34,148
What is word?
715
00:55:34,774 --> 00:55:36,109
The bed?
716
00:55:36,609 --> 00:55:38,611
Belt? Orion's belt?
717
00:55:58,881 --> 00:56:02,260
"To prevent war, the Galaxy
is on Orion's belt."
718
00:56:02,510 --> 00:56:04,429
What the hell does that mean?
719
00:56:07,890 --> 00:56:09,392
Doctor...
720
00:56:09,600 --> 00:56:10,935
...whatever, come here.
721
00:56:11,185 --> 00:56:15,189
Dr. Whatever? You guys aren't really
from the Department of Health.
722
00:56:15,481 --> 00:56:17,316
Rosenberg. Damn!
723
00:56:17,567 --> 00:56:21,904
The Arquillians won't like this.
He was one of the royal family.
724
00:56:22,196 --> 00:56:23,406
This is an alien...
725
00:56:23,614 --> 00:56:26,951
...and you're from a government agency
keeping it under wraps.
726
00:56:27,160 --> 00:56:30,413
He said, "To prevent war,
the Galaxy is on Orion's belt."
727
00:56:30,663 --> 00:56:32,874
How else do you explain New York?
728
00:56:33,082 --> 00:56:35,459
I was in this cab, and this guy was...
729
00:56:37,336 --> 00:56:39,463
"Galaxy on Orion's belt"
makes no sense.
730
00:56:39,672 --> 00:56:43,634
That's what the little dude inside
the big dude's head said, right?
731
00:56:43,843 --> 00:56:46,804
Damn, man!
You did the flashy thing already.
732
00:56:47,054 --> 00:56:49,640
Whoever you are,
you'll have to show me I.D.
733
00:56:49,891 --> 00:56:52,935
Of course, young lady.
Look at this for me, please.
734
00:56:53,185 --> 00:56:55,021
- Would you stop that?
- What?
735
00:56:55,229 --> 00:56:57,356
That thing will give her brain cancer.
736
00:56:57,607 --> 00:56:59,859
Never hurt her before.
Close the doors.
737
00:57:00,109 --> 00:57:01,902
Special Services will be here.
738
00:57:02,153 --> 00:57:05,031
How many times have you
flashy-thinged that woman?
739
00:57:05,281 --> 00:57:06,115
Couple.
740
00:57:06,365 --> 00:57:09,618
- Don't you worry about long-term damage?
- A little.
741
00:57:09,869 --> 00:57:11,787
- Have you flashy-thinged me?
- No.
742
00:57:12,038 --> 00:57:14,498
I ain't playing with you! Have you?
743
00:57:24,133 --> 00:57:27,178
I think I should be in charge
of the flashy thing.
744
00:57:27,428 --> 00:57:28,846
Not while I'm around.
745
00:57:29,096 --> 00:57:31,307
You'll fricassee someone's brain.
746
00:57:31,557 --> 00:57:35,561
We got two dead aliens and
a medical examiner needs a new memory.
747
00:57:38,147 --> 00:57:40,483
Make it a happy memory.
748
00:58:13,724 --> 00:58:15,809
Where is it?!
749
00:58:59,603 --> 00:59:01,063
Hey, Zed.
750
00:59:01,605 --> 00:59:04,399
Doesn't anybody ever get
any sleep around here?
751
00:59:04,650 --> 00:59:08,570
The twins keep us on Centurian time.
It's a 37-hour day.
752
00:59:08,779 --> 00:59:11,031
Give it a few months.
You'll get used to it.
753
00:59:11,281 --> 00:59:12,908
Or have a psychotic episode.
754
00:59:13,408 --> 00:59:14,535
Here's Orion.
755
00:59:14,743 --> 00:59:17,746
It's a grouping of the brightest stars
in the northern sky.
756
00:59:17,996 --> 00:59:20,582
- Here's Orion's belt.
- The little guy said:
757
00:59:20,832 --> 00:59:24,169
"To prevent war, the Galaxy
is on Orion's belt."
758
00:59:24,419 --> 00:59:26,672
There are no galaxies
on Orion's belt.
759
00:59:26,922 --> 00:59:30,634
The belt is just these three stars.
Galaxies are huge.
760
00:59:30,842 --> 00:59:34,972
They're made up of billions of stars.
You heard wrong.
761
00:59:35,847 --> 00:59:38,308
Look, whatever, I know what I heard.
762
01:00:15,429 --> 01:00:16,763
Pretty lady.
763
01:00:23,228 --> 01:00:27,816
That grumpy guy's story's starting to
come into focus a little bit here.
764
01:00:28,525 --> 01:00:31,736
So you were the guy in that picture
with the flowers?
765
01:00:32,696 --> 01:00:36,032
And, I take it,
she never got those flowers.
766
01:00:36,741 --> 01:00:39,619
So, what, she ever get married
or anything?
767
01:00:40,829 --> 01:00:43,748
They say it's better to have
loved and lost...
768
01:00:43,957 --> 01:00:46,084
...than never to have loved at all.
769
01:00:46,334 --> 01:00:47,419
Try it.
770
01:00:53,091 --> 01:00:54,217
Look at this.
771
01:00:54,467 --> 01:00:55,927
They're all leaving.
772
01:00:56,177 --> 01:01:00,098
We've had 12 jumps in the last hour.
Redgick was just the first.
773
01:01:00,974 --> 01:01:02,767
What do they know that we don't?
774
01:01:03,018 --> 01:01:04,561
Why does a rat desert a ship?
775
01:01:04,769 --> 01:01:08,606
Give me Lem Sat 4, please,
with a proton induction thermoscan.
776
01:01:10,442 --> 01:01:12,694
Thank you. Okay. Lem Sat 18.
777
01:01:14,821 --> 01:01:16,031
All right, 4000.
778
01:01:20,410 --> 01:01:21,870
An Arquillian battle cruiser.
779
01:01:22,120 --> 01:01:24,789
And we've got
a dead Arquillian prince.
780
01:01:26,583 --> 01:01:28,084
Speak of the devil.
781
01:01:29,127 --> 01:01:30,044
They sound pissed.
782
01:01:30,295 --> 01:01:31,755
Translate that. Step on it.
783
01:01:32,130 --> 01:01:35,633
Go to Rosenberg's jewellery store,
and see what you can turn up.
784
01:01:41,598 --> 01:01:42,849
Give the kid a weapon.
785
01:01:52,692 --> 01:01:55,945
- Series 4 De-atomizer.
- That's what I'm talking about.
786
01:01:56,154 --> 01:01:57,822
Noisy Cricket.
787
01:01:59,949 --> 01:02:01,951
Kay, no, no, come on, man.
788
01:02:02,202 --> 01:02:04,662
You get a Series 4 De-atomizer...
789
01:02:04,913 --> 01:02:06,789
...I get a little midget Cricket?
790
01:02:10,793 --> 01:02:12,712
Feel like I'm gonna break it.
791
01:02:57,131 --> 01:02:59,425
Hey, this is my truck!
792
01:03:00,510 --> 01:03:03,638
Make sure you tell them that
down at the impound.
793
01:03:10,978 --> 01:03:12,939
Please.
794
01:03:22,365 --> 01:03:24,825
Who breaks into a jewellery store
and leaves the jewels?
795
01:03:25,076 --> 01:03:27,245
Somebody not looking for jewellery.
796
01:03:29,497 --> 01:03:31,958
This guy had a serious crush
on his cat.
797
01:03:34,585 --> 01:03:35,503
Get down!
798
01:03:40,841 --> 01:03:41,884
Man!
799
01:03:43,761 --> 01:03:45,680
That's him. That's the bug!
800
01:03:45,888 --> 01:03:47,264
In the Edgar suit!
801
01:04:08,953 --> 01:04:11,705
We do not discharge our weapons
in view of the public!
802
01:04:11,956 --> 01:04:13,916
We ain't got time for this bullshit!
803
01:04:14,166 --> 01:04:16,544
There's a alien battle cruiser
about to...
804
01:04:16,794 --> 01:04:19,672
There's always an alien battle
cruiser or a death ray...
805
01:04:19,922 --> 01:04:22,758
...or an intergalactic plague
about to wipe out life on Earth.
806
01:04:23,008 --> 01:04:25,928
The only way people get on
with their happy lives...
807
01:04:26,136 --> 01:04:28,848
...is they do not know about it!
808
01:04:33,602 --> 01:04:35,521
And don't worry about the bug.
809
01:04:35,813 --> 01:04:38,190
He's not leaving town.
We got his ship.
810
01:04:46,031 --> 01:04:48,033
We need a containment crew...
811
01:04:48,242 --> 01:04:49,910
... on MacDougal Street.
812
01:04:50,744 --> 01:04:54,373
Containment may be a moot point.
The exodus continues.
813
01:04:54,623 --> 01:04:58,460
The party's over, and the last one
to leave gets stuck with the check.
814
01:04:58,711 --> 01:05:01,171
You sorry little ingrates!
815
01:05:09,263 --> 01:05:10,931
What about the Arquillians?
816
01:05:11,181 --> 01:05:14,601
We've translated part of the message:
" Deliver the Galaxy."
817
01:05:14,852 --> 01:05:18,063
-They don't want much, do they?
- Oh, it gets better.
818
01:05:18,313 --> 01:05:19,773
They hold us responsible.
819
01:05:28,741 --> 01:05:30,742
Where do you keep your dead?
820
01:05:30,951 --> 01:05:32,744
I don't have any dead.
821
01:05:33,287 --> 01:05:34,371
Where?
822
01:05:34,621 --> 01:05:35,956
I don't know.
823
01:05:36,457 --> 01:05:38,459
The city morgue?
824
01:05:48,468 --> 01:05:50,888
That's three for a dollar, sir!
825
01:05:51,471 --> 01:05:54,433
It was some light
that refracted off of Venus...
826
01:05:54,683 --> 01:05:56,143
...into some swamp gas...
827
01:05:56,393 --> 01:05:57,895
...and that's what made the...
828
01:05:58,145 --> 01:05:59,563
All right, kid!
829
01:06:00,355 --> 01:06:01,773
Excuse me.
What's up?
830
01:06:02,024 --> 01:06:04,693
The Arquillians want the Galaxy,
whatever that means.
831
01:06:04,902 --> 01:06:06,737
We need help, a professional...
832
01:06:06,987 --> 01:06:10,157
...with years of experience
in intergalactic politics.
833
01:06:10,407 --> 01:06:13,076
I hope the little twerp
hasn't skipped town.
834
01:06:15,454 --> 01:06:17,289
If you'll gather over here...
835
01:06:17,539 --> 01:06:20,917
That's right, move in closer.
That's good. Thanks.
836
01:06:21,168 --> 01:06:24,629
If you look right here,
I'd appreciate it. Thank you.
837
01:06:37,684 --> 01:06:40,437
The worst disguise ever.
He's definitely an alien.
838
01:06:40,687 --> 01:06:43,482
You don't like it,
you can kiss my furry butt.
839
01:06:44,149 --> 01:06:45,025
Busy, Frank?
840
01:06:45,275 --> 01:06:47,402
Can't talk now.
My flight's leaving in...
841
01:06:47,652 --> 01:06:48,695
Get your paws off!
842
01:06:48,904 --> 01:06:50,113
Call the pound!
843
01:06:50,363 --> 01:06:52,449
The dog owes my friend money.
844
01:06:52,699 --> 01:06:54,284
Arquillians and bugs,
what do you know?
845
01:06:54,534 --> 01:06:55,786
- Nothing.
- Not a thing?
846
01:06:58,705 --> 01:07:01,249
Stop, stop, stop it!
Okay, okay!
847
01:07:01,625 --> 01:07:03,793
Rosenberg wasn't a two-bit Arquillian.
848
01:07:04,002 --> 01:07:07,339
He was the guardian of the Galaxy.
He thought he'd be safe on Earth.
849
01:07:07,589 --> 01:07:08,548
The bug had other plans.
850
01:07:08,757 --> 01:07:12,636
The Galaxy is the best source
for subatomic energy in the universe.
851
01:07:12,886 --> 01:07:15,639
If the bugs get it,
kiss the Arquillians goodbye.
852
01:07:15,889 --> 01:07:16,932
Ask about the belt.
853
01:07:17,182 --> 01:07:19,851
Rosenberg mentioned Orion's belt.
What did he mean?
854
01:07:20,101 --> 01:07:21,895
- Beats me.
- Beats you?
855
01:07:22,687 --> 01:07:23,855
Not around.
856
01:07:26,775 --> 01:07:28,818
It's a ventriloquist act.
857
01:07:29,069 --> 01:07:30,946
The Galaxy is here!
858
01:07:31,780 --> 01:07:32,614
Here?
859
01:07:32,822 --> 01:07:35,408
A galaxy's millions of stars
and planets.
860
01:07:35,659 --> 01:07:38,161
When will you learn
that size doesn't matter?
861
01:07:38,620 --> 01:07:41,665
If something's important,
it doesn't mean it's not small.
862
01:07:41,998 --> 01:07:42,999
How small?
863
01:07:43,208 --> 01:07:45,293
The size of a marble or a jewel.
864
01:07:45,794 --> 01:07:48,463
Excuse me. I gotta be walked
before my flight.
865
01:07:48,713 --> 01:07:49,589
Get out of here.
866
01:07:52,133 --> 01:07:55,512
If the Galaxy's here,
it's not on Orion's belt.
867
01:08:15,782 --> 01:08:17,826
When you want attention...
868
01:08:19,285 --> 01:08:20,119
Orion.
869
01:08:20,328 --> 01:08:22,080
That's a pretty name.
870
01:08:22,622 --> 01:08:24,165
What's this?
871
01:09:18,636 --> 01:09:20,763
Yes, good, thank you.
872
01:09:21,013 --> 01:09:24,100
Thank you for making sure
the bell works.
873
01:09:26,811 --> 01:09:28,521
What's up, Farmer John?
874
01:09:30,064 --> 01:09:32,650
A man came in here earlier.
875
01:09:33,234 --> 01:09:34,068
A dead man.
876
01:09:34,318 --> 01:09:36,279
And that means what to me?
877
01:09:38,322 --> 01:09:41,200
It was a very dear friend of mine.
878
01:09:41,909 --> 01:09:43,995
I believe he had an animal with him.
879
01:09:44,245 --> 01:09:46,789
It was a gift I gave him. A pet cat.
880
01:09:47,039 --> 01:09:48,666
It means worlds to me.
881
01:09:48,916 --> 01:09:50,668
I'd like to have it back.
882
01:09:50,918 --> 01:09:54,380
I'll need picture I.D.,
proof of ownership of the cat...
883
01:09:54,630 --> 01:09:58,134
...notarized proof of kinship
with the deceased.
884
01:09:59,093 --> 01:10:00,511
Don't do that.
885
01:10:02,263 --> 01:10:03,347
Do what?
886
01:10:04,515 --> 01:10:06,017
Don't do it.
887
01:10:08,603 --> 01:10:09,979
Oh, man.
888
01:10:25,661 --> 01:10:27,913
Look, Kay, let me handle this one.
889
01:10:28,164 --> 01:10:30,875
All we gotta do is get a cat.
It's not that hard.
890
01:10:31,125 --> 01:10:35,421
But if you go in there, you'll start
flashing your brain ray in her face.
891
01:10:35,629 --> 01:10:37,298
She'll wind up with leukemia.
892
01:10:37,548 --> 01:10:41,385
The doctor don't need you flashing away
her med-school classes. Five minutes.
893
01:10:41,635 --> 01:10:42,970
Two minutes.
894
01:10:45,473 --> 01:10:46,515
Where's the animal?
895
01:10:46,766 --> 01:10:48,225
I said I don't know.
896
01:10:48,434 --> 01:10:50,728
Well, let's see if we can find it.
897
01:10:56,150 --> 01:10:57,276
Hello!
898
01:11:06,535 --> 01:11:07,661
Hello!
899
01:11:12,082 --> 01:11:13,626
- How you doing?
- Hello.
900
01:11:13,876 --> 01:11:16,795
I'm Sergeant Friday
from the 26th Precinct.
901
01:11:17,046 --> 01:11:19,632
A cat came in with a corpse
the other day.
902
01:11:19,882 --> 01:11:21,967
- "Orion" on the nametag?
- Right.
903
01:11:22,801 --> 01:11:25,763
Well, this cat is a witness...
904
01:11:26,013 --> 01:11:28,474
...in a murder case.
I'll need to take him.
905
01:11:28,724 --> 01:11:30,309
I don't know where the cat is.
906
01:11:30,559 --> 01:11:31,852
You don't?
907
01:11:32,394 --> 01:11:35,105
No, but maybe you could take me
with you instead.
908
01:11:37,107 --> 01:11:40,110
Damn, you do start fast,
don't you?
909
01:11:40,319 --> 01:11:42,112
I'd really like to go with you...
910
01:11:42,446 --> 01:11:43,447
...now.
911
01:11:44,406 --> 01:11:46,784
And exactly why is that?
912
01:11:54,083 --> 01:11:56,085
I need to show you something.
913
01:11:56,668 --> 01:11:57,628
Slow down.
914
01:11:57,878 --> 01:12:01,131
- Girl, don't hit the gas like that!
- You don't understand.
915
01:12:01,381 --> 01:12:03,634
You really need to see this.
916
01:12:03,884 --> 01:12:08,472
I will. One thing. I gotta drive.
It's not some macho trip.
917
01:12:08,680 --> 01:12:11,100
That's just the way I get down.
918
01:12:22,236 --> 01:12:24,863
Look, stud, you're
really not getting this.
919
01:12:25,072 --> 01:12:28,200
There's something I need you
to help me with.
920
01:12:39,127 --> 01:12:40,212
Freeze it!
921
01:12:40,462 --> 01:12:41,505
You are thick!
922
01:12:41,755 --> 01:12:42,881
How could I know?
923
01:12:43,090 --> 01:12:44,341
Did I have to sing it?
924
01:12:44,591 --> 01:12:46,134
You were like a drunk prom date.
925
01:12:46,385 --> 01:12:50,264
Typical. Anytime a woman shows
even a hint of sexual independence...
926
01:12:50,472 --> 01:12:51,306
Shut up!
927
01:12:51,515 --> 01:12:52,349
Let her go!
928
01:12:52,557 --> 01:12:54,351
Listen, monkey-boy...
929
01:12:54,601 --> 01:12:57,813
...l'm on the top rung
of the evolutionary ladder.
930
01:12:58,063 --> 01:12:59,147
So can it.
931
01:12:59,398 --> 01:13:01,900
Show me your face,
and I'll cure your ills.
932
01:13:02,192 --> 01:13:05,570
Ever pull wings off a fly?
Care to see the fly get even?
933
01:13:05,779 --> 01:13:07,197
What about your ship?
934
01:13:07,447 --> 01:13:10,367
If that's what you call
that trash we got locked up.
935
01:13:10,617 --> 01:13:12,994
- Put your weapons down!
- Won't happen.
936
01:13:13,245 --> 01:13:14,079
It's okay.
937
01:13:14,371 --> 01:13:15,914
How is it okay?
938
01:13:16,164 --> 01:13:18,250
I'm saying it's gonna be okay.
939
01:13:18,500 --> 01:13:20,419
Don't bet on it, meat sack.
940
01:13:30,178 --> 01:13:31,721
Let me go!
941
01:13:42,691 --> 01:13:43,942
Go on!
942
01:13:47,946 --> 01:13:49,239
Take me here.
943
01:13:49,489 --> 01:13:50,323
No way.
944
01:13:51,783 --> 01:13:52,617
Take me!
945
01:14:10,677 --> 01:14:11,511
He's in a cab!
946
01:14:33,992 --> 01:14:36,369
Don't move! Don't move!
Don't move!
947
01:14:36,911 --> 01:14:38,371
Hey, man, what?
948
01:14:49,632 --> 01:14:52,469
He's not leaving the planet in a cab.
Let's go.
949
01:14:57,432 --> 01:15:00,101
Put up a bionet
all the way around Manhattan.
950
01:15:00,351 --> 01:15:02,645
If it's not human, it doesn't leave.
951
01:15:04,022 --> 01:15:05,607
What do we hear from upstairs?
952
01:15:05,857 --> 01:15:07,066
" Deliver the Galaxy."
953
01:15:07,317 --> 01:15:10,320
The bug's got the Galaxy,
but we got his ship.
954
01:15:13,489 --> 01:15:15,825
Warning:
Plutonic fusion detection.
955
01:15:16,910 --> 01:15:19,287
Warning:
Plutonic fusion detection.
956
01:15:23,958 --> 01:15:26,502
- Why are they shooting at us?
- Battle rules.
957
01:15:26,753 --> 01:15:31,007
We get an ultimatum, a warning shot,
then a galactic week to respond.
958
01:15:31,591 --> 01:15:34,135
A galactic week?
How the hell long is that?
959
01:15:34,385 --> 01:15:35,470
One hour.
960
01:15:35,845 --> 01:15:37,013
One hour?
961
01:15:37,555 --> 01:15:38,640
Then what?
962
01:15:43,978 --> 01:15:45,188
That's bullshit!
963
01:15:45,396 --> 01:15:49,359
To keep the bugs from getting it,
Arquillians will destroy that galaxy.
964
01:15:49,609 --> 01:15:52,111
And whatever planet it's on.
965
01:15:53,237 --> 01:15:54,697
You're talking about us.
966
01:15:54,947 --> 01:15:56,365
Sucks, huh?
967
01:15:58,951 --> 01:16:01,704
I'll get the location
of every interstellar vehicle.
968
01:16:01,954 --> 01:16:04,123
I already did.
Frank took the last ship.
969
01:16:04,373 --> 01:16:06,542
- Sneden's Landing and Throg's Neck.
- Gone.
970
01:16:06,793 --> 01:16:08,586
- What about Atlantic City?
- Gone.
971
01:16:08,836 --> 01:16:10,254
- Bayonne?
- Gone.
972
01:16:10,505 --> 01:16:13,049
- There's Three Mile Island.
- Gone.
973
01:16:13,299 --> 01:16:15,384
- Staten Island?
- Gone, thank God.
974
01:16:15,802 --> 01:16:19,680
We're running out of time. If that
bug gets off Earth, we're bug food.
975
01:16:19,931 --> 01:16:21,015
Hey, old guys!
976
01:16:26,103 --> 01:16:27,980
Do those still work?
977
01:16:43,204 --> 01:16:45,248
- You're coming with me.
- What?
978
01:16:45,790 --> 01:16:47,667
It's a long trip.
I'll need a snack.
979
01:16:47,667 --> 01:16:48,668
It's a long trip.
I'll need a snack.
980
01:16:54,674 --> 01:16:55,633
The tunnel?
981
01:16:55,883 --> 01:16:58,761
- You know a better way to Queens?
- It'll be packed!
982
01:17:12,191 --> 01:17:13,484
Remember the red button?
983
01:17:14,110 --> 01:17:15,778
Push the red button.
984
01:17:16,570 --> 01:17:17,905
Put on a seat belt.
985
01:17:30,459 --> 01:17:33,087
You're much too tense.
You're young. Relax.
986
01:17:33,337 --> 01:17:35,089
Take some joy in your work.
987
01:17:35,339 --> 01:17:36,507
Do you like music?
988
01:17:40,678 --> 01:17:41,720
That's better.
989
01:17:41,929 --> 01:17:45,391
... in Norfolk, Virginia
California on my mind
990
01:17:45,850 --> 01:17:48,519
I straddled that Greyhound
And rode him into Raleigh
991
01:17:48,727 --> 01:17:50,521
And on across Caroline
992
01:17:50,938 --> 01:17:53,899
Somebody help me
Get out of Louisiana
993
01:17:55,859 --> 01:17:58,237
There are people there
Who care a little 'bout me
994
01:17:58,445 --> 01:18:01,824
-And won't let the poor boy down
- All right, now!
995
01:18:13,377 --> 01:18:14,962
You do know Elvis is dead?
996
01:18:15,212 --> 01:18:17,756
No, Elvis is not dead.
He just went home.
997
01:18:33,105 --> 01:18:34,648
You don't wanna eat me.
998
01:18:34,898 --> 01:18:37,693
I'm an important person on my planet.
Like a queen!
999
01:18:37,901 --> 01:18:40,738
A goddess, even.
There are those who worship me.
1000
01:18:40,988 --> 01:18:42,739
I'm not trying to impress you.
1001
01:18:42,990 --> 01:18:45,033
I'm just saying it could start a war!
1002
01:18:45,284 --> 01:18:47,828
Good, war. That means
more food for my family.
1003
01:18:48,078 --> 01:18:51,457
All 78 million of them.
That's a lot of mouths to feed.
1004
01:18:51,665 --> 01:18:54,293
You're a wonderful dad,
but I'm staying here!
1005
01:19:15,939 --> 01:19:18,066
Now, that's what I'm talking about.
1006
01:19:19,359 --> 01:19:21,194
Roaches check in.
1007
01:19:23,238 --> 01:19:24,489
They don't check out.
1008
01:19:29,286 --> 01:19:33,332
Warning: E ight minutes
to the destruction of Earth.
1009
01:19:35,125 --> 01:19:36,418
E ight minutes...
1010
01:19:36,668 --> 01:19:37,919
... to destruction.
1011
01:20:23,131 --> 01:20:25,967
We'll use pulsar level five
with an implosion factor.
1012
01:20:26,218 --> 01:20:27,052
What?!
1013
01:20:27,260 --> 01:20:30,472
Just shoot the damn thing
on the count of three. One...
1014
01:20:30,722 --> 01:20:31,932
...two, three!
1015
01:21:32,659 --> 01:21:34,244
You idiots!
1016
01:21:35,495 --> 01:21:37,288
You don't get it!
1017
01:21:37,539 --> 01:21:38,414
I've won.
1018
01:21:39,249 --> 01:21:39,457
It's over.
1019
01:21:39,457 --> 01:21:41,042
It's over.
1020
01:21:41,501 --> 01:21:43,419
You're milk-suckers!
1021
01:21:44,045 --> 01:21:45,713
You don't matter.
1022
01:21:46,005 --> 01:21:48,466
In a few seconds,
you won't even be matter.
1023
01:21:48,716 --> 01:21:51,427
You're under arrest
for violating the Tycho Treaty.
1024
01:21:51,678 --> 01:21:54,430
So hand over whatever galaxy
you might be carrying...
1025
01:21:54,681 --> 01:21:57,392
...and put your hands on your head.
1026
01:22:02,397 --> 01:22:04,232
I'll put my hands...
1027
01:22:06,734 --> 01:22:07,986
...on my head.
1028
01:22:12,407 --> 01:22:13,408
Like this?
1029
01:22:42,728 --> 01:22:44,814
That did not go the way I planned.
1030
01:22:45,064 --> 01:22:46,732
Don't let him on the second ship.
1031
01:22:46,983 --> 01:22:49,902
- What are you talking about?
- Keep him on this planet.
1032
01:22:50,153 --> 01:22:52,113
Where are you going?
1033
01:22:52,738 --> 01:22:54,615
I'm gonna get my gun back.
1034
01:22:57,410 --> 01:22:58,244
Hey, bug!
1035
01:22:58,494 --> 01:23:01,414
You know how many of your kind
I've swatted with a paper?
1036
01:23:01,664 --> 01:23:04,166
You're just a smear
on the sports page...
1037
01:23:04,417 --> 01:23:07,336
...you slimy, gut-sucking,
intestinal parasite!
1038
01:23:07,837 --> 01:23:09,255
Eat me!
1039
01:23:09,463 --> 01:23:10,798
Eat me!
1040
01:23:29,108 --> 01:23:30,026
What's up?
1041
01:23:30,609 --> 01:23:33,821
You just gonna eat and run?
What about dessert?
1042
01:23:39,785 --> 01:23:41,203
That's it?
1043
01:23:41,620 --> 01:23:45,082
Where you going?
This party's just getting started.
1044
01:23:45,833 --> 01:23:47,168
Where you going?
1045
01:23:48,169 --> 01:23:49,879
Where you going?
1046
01:23:51,047 --> 01:23:52,131
Let me tell you.
1047
01:23:52,381 --> 01:23:55,843
There's only one way off this planet,
and that's through me.
1048
01:24:39,386 --> 01:24:40,846
Where you going?
1049
01:24:41,722 --> 01:24:43,223
Why you running, huh?
1050
01:24:43,682 --> 01:24:45,392
I'm still standing.
1051
01:24:46,060 --> 01:24:48,062
Come on, bring it. Bring it!
1052
01:25:07,915 --> 01:25:10,376
I'm sorry.
Was that your auntie?
1053
01:25:12,586 --> 01:25:14,421
That means that's your uncle.
1054
01:25:17,424 --> 01:25:18,675
You all look alike.
1055
01:25:27,059 --> 01:25:28,852
Well, well.
1056
01:25:29,102 --> 01:25:32,606
Big, bad bug got
a bit of a soft spot, huh?
1057
01:25:36,276 --> 01:25:38,362
I can't understand why you gotta...
1058
01:25:38,612 --> 01:25:41,073
...come down here
bringing all this ruckus...
1059
01:25:41,323 --> 01:25:44,076
...snatching up galaxies
and everything.
1060
01:25:44,284 --> 01:25:48,413
My attitude is, don't start nothing,
won't be nothing.
1061
01:25:54,670 --> 01:25:58,340
Ease up out of my face before
something bad happens to you.
1062
01:26:00,425 --> 01:26:01,510
Too late.
1063
01:26:31,206 --> 01:26:33,625
Tell the Arquillians
we have the Galaxy.
1064
01:26:33,875 --> 01:26:35,669
You got it, friend.
1065
01:26:37,337 --> 01:26:39,464
Going to get your gun back, huh?
1066
01:26:39,714 --> 01:26:41,174
I like this gun.
1067
01:26:41,925 --> 01:26:46,138
While you was in there playing around,
I was doing all the work.
1068
01:26:46,388 --> 01:26:49,349
I had to bean him in the head
with this big rock.
1069
01:26:49,599 --> 01:26:51,518
I was gonna hit him with a 2-by-4.
1070
01:26:51,768 --> 01:26:53,353
He kicked me. It hurt.
1071
01:26:53,603 --> 01:26:56,356
But then I got to the fire.
I was like that with it.
1072
01:26:56,606 --> 01:26:59,025
Not bad for your second
day of work, is it?
1073
01:26:59,860 --> 01:27:03,196
This definitely rates a 9.0
on my weird-shit-o-metre.
1074
01:27:03,613 --> 01:27:07,367
Should've been here for
the Zeronion migration in 1968.
1075
01:27:09,995 --> 01:27:12,622
I guess you weren't even alive in '68.
1076
01:27:18,295 --> 01:27:20,922
Interesting job you guys have.
1077
01:27:37,063 --> 01:27:38,898
I know we got these rules...
1078
01:27:39,149 --> 01:27:41,401
...but she did help us bust that bug.
1079
01:27:41,651 --> 01:27:44,320
Maybe we didn't have to
flashy-thing her.
1080
01:27:45,989 --> 01:27:49,200
Come on. Who will she tell?
She hang out with dead people.
1081
01:27:49,451 --> 01:27:51,077
It's not for her.
1082
01:27:51,327 --> 01:27:52,620
It's for me.
1083
01:27:54,330 --> 01:27:55,665
What?
1084
01:27:57,876 --> 01:27:59,085
Aren't they beautiful?
1085
01:28:00,879 --> 01:28:01,713
Stars.
1086
01:28:02,338 --> 01:28:05,383
I never look at them anymore,
but they actually are...
1087
01:28:08,136 --> 01:28:09,512
...beautiful.
1088
01:28:14,184 --> 01:28:16,561
Kay, you're frightening your partner.
1089
01:28:16,811 --> 01:28:19,939
I've been training a replacement,
not a partner.
1090
01:28:20,982 --> 01:28:22,609
Wait a minute, Kay.
1091
01:28:23,109 --> 01:28:25,361
I cannot do this job by myself.
1092
01:28:25,612 --> 01:28:28,281
Guys, my apartment isn't
anywhere near here.
1093
01:28:28,489 --> 01:28:30,450
It's not even on the same island.
1094
01:28:32,035 --> 01:28:33,036
Days...
1095
01:28:33,244 --> 01:28:34,454
...months...
1096
01:28:34,704 --> 01:28:35,872
...years.
1097
01:28:36,205 --> 01:28:37,874
Always face it forward.
1098
01:28:47,550 --> 01:28:50,219
I was in an interstellar
cockroach's gullet.
1099
01:28:50,470 --> 01:28:52,889
That's one of 100 memories
I don't want.
1100
01:29:09,989 --> 01:29:11,324
See you around.
1101
01:29:17,580 --> 01:29:18,748
No...
1102
01:29:19,540 --> 01:29:20,833
...you won't.
1103
01:29:56,744 --> 01:29:58,955
The high consulate
from Solaxium 9...
1104
01:29:59,163 --> 01:30:01,082
...wants seats for the Bulls game.
1105
01:30:01,332 --> 01:30:03,918
Call Dennis Rodman.
He's from that planet.
1106
01:30:06,170 --> 01:30:07,797
Rodman? You're kidding.
1107
01:30:08,089 --> 01:30:09,131
Nope.
1108
01:30:09,715 --> 01:30:11,759
Not much of a disguise.
1109
01:37:55,346 --> 01:37:56,305
Subtitles : Filou ;-)
80381
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.