Original subtitles

- In other news on this Halloween day,

convicted killer, John Louis Barker, is being returned

back to the federal facility

for the criminally insane tonight.

Earlier today, Judge Andrew Sykes declared a mistrial

of the case of the psycho killer,

and tonight authorities are transporting Barker

out-of-state to the federal facility

for the criminally insane.

A hard freeze last night in the Reno Grande Valley

has claimed about 25 percent of the cash citrus crop

of Reno Visual.

Texas farmers say this October

has brought the coldest weather in recent years.

- Hey, tell Scooter to get his butt in here,

I need a hand. - All right, all right.

- You fellas remember who to vote for on Tuesday.

- These things oughta knock 'em dead

once I get Fez to splay 'em pins up.

- Shh.

- I went to every dang

place in the county, - Here, appreciate your

vote this comin' Tuesday. - Before I could find a store

that, - Dammit!

- Oh no, here, lemme see.

Lemme see, lemme see.

Ah, you'll live.

Here, have a beer.

- Fire marshal check this place out?

This stuff's as warm going' in as it is comin' out.

- It's rodeo cold!

- Here, appreciate your vote on Tuesday.

- Don't mind that one. - Thanks anyway.

- Never go anywhere without a beer in my hand.

- I'm working better now anyway.

One thing for sure.

This year, they're gonna get more than their money's worth.

- Whaddya think?

All the sheriffs're wearin' 'em.

You know, Jerry,

this brings back

the old spirit of Halloween.

All 'cause of a few crazies, kids can't go door to door

like we use to.

They need something like this.

- Well,

it's kinda much for some of the little ones.

- Yeah, speaking of little ones,

I got to get back to town,

kiss a few more rug-rats.

Now you make sure all them things get handed out, now.

- You just make sure you kick Kirkland's ass.

- Cross my heart and hope to die.

- Brad, please.

Let's just go.

- Ugh, get a grip, please!

Geez!

Talk about a chest fest!

Ho's love this kinda thing.

They hang all over ya.

Come on, let's find Shelley and what's her face.

- You made it.

Well, whaddya think?

- Well, uh, that's,

it's beautiful.

Wonderful.

Let's pollinate.

- Come on up, folks, come on all the way up.

- Bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh, bleh.

- Whooh!

Weren't sure you were gonna show up.

- Well, you know what they say,

incredible things come to those who wait.

Oh!

This is, uh,

Warren, Warren Kilpatrick.

- Hi, I'm Shelley.

Are my antennas straight?

- Well, they seem to be okay to me.

- Oh, Warren, here's

Barbara.

- Cute!

Sorry, forgot my glasses.

- Oh, you wear glasses.

My mother wears

wears glasses.

- Dude.

- Fascinating.

- Barbara, Brad, Brad, Barbara.

- Hi, glad to meet you.

And, um, my mother doesn't wear glasses.

- You always make that sound

when you suck on things?

More rum where that came from.

Warren, keys please!

Ah, what a guy, what a bro, what the, aw, C'mon.

- So, uh, you work somewhere?

- Yeah, at a movie theater.

It's really...

- Come on up, folks.

Come on all the way up, folks, don't be scared.

Come on.

Yeah, cutie, come on all the way up.

No reason to be scared, cutie.

- So, uh, you're real talkative tonight.

- Heh.

Uh.

Uh, that's, uh,

that's quite a costume.

- Thanks.

I'm a virgin goddess.

Need a salt shaker?

I make it a rule,

never leave a restaurant without taking something.

You know, get that five finger discount.

And me, a Capricorn.

That's the weird part.

For emergencies.

Eat!

You got a problem or something?

- Sorry.

Just had a really bad day.

- Give me your hand.

Give me your hand.

This is interesting.

I've never seen this before.

If we follow this line,

it leads us to

ooh.

- What?

What is it?

Bad luck?

♪ You wonder where the yeller went ♪

♪ When you brush your teeth with Pepperdent ♪

♪ Oh yeah, you wonder, wonder?

♪ Where that crappy ol' yeller went ♪

♪ When you ♪

There you are, gal!

- You make me want to crap green onions.

- Oh no!

- Well, whaddya know.

C'mon, we'll give you cuts.

- Thanks, but no thanks.

- Come on, you're going in with us.

- No, J.J., I said no.

No.

- I guess she doesn't wanna go.

- If I wanted to hear from an asshole,

I'd fart.

- Better watch out, J.J., he'll beat you up.

- Yeah, don't make me use my karate.

Hah!

- You think you're a real comedian, don't you, pal?

I don't like comedians.

- Oh, you're so macho, playing with knives.

- Stay out of it, Barbara.

This is between me

and the comedian.

- What's going on here?

What's going on?

- Party's over, pal.

- Later days!

- What's, what's going on?

- I have to go to the bathroom.

You should have seen,

- This is Briggs again.

Check on that EMS unit.

- It's no use sheriff.

He still can't talk.

His tongue and teeth are half gone.

- You fellas finding anything?

- Nope!

Now, nothing yet.

- Hold on.

We're not ready for you yet.

- Gotcha.

- Dammit, we need that EMS.

- Might be under the van.

- Yeah.

Now, Marvin, w...

- Sure bet you it moved under there.

- Ah, Marvin, what we gotta do real quick...

- There's one way to find out.

I could have that thing outta there in under 10 minutes.

- We'll get to it when we're ready.

- Now, Marvin,

hot dammit, what the hell was I gonna say?

- I'd try to get 'em outta here tonight, Sheriff,

before the clock strikes November one.

- Well, you just let me know when you're ready.

- Yeah.

- Some lawyers tryin' to get him out on acquittal.

- Hell, he ain't gonna make that deadline.

- That's for sure.

- Got somethin' for you, Pat.

- Patrick.

That's a rabbit foot.

- Good luck.

For the campaign.

- Yeah.

Now, Basil, what time you come up on this?

- Doggone.

Can't say, Pat.

Don't wear no watch no more.

- Hey Sheriff, I found your straitjacket.

- Oh boy.

I'm going to drive over to that haunted chicken shack thing,

kinda check around.

Dammit, I need every deputy I can get.

Basil, I need somebody to warn drivers

not to pick up hitchhikers tonight,

you think you can handle that?

- Mmm hmm.

- Marvin, get them roadblocks up fast,

we got some huntin' to do.

- Already in motion, sir.

Captain Donaghy himself's comin' down

with a whole lot of backup.

Seems the disappearance of John Louis Barker

sort of got their attention.

- Base to Taylor.

Copy, base, this is Taylor,

go ahead.

What's the situation on Barker?

- Ah, nothin'.

Better notify the FBI that John Louis Barker

has still not been apprehended.

- 10-4.

We'll keep our APB out on Barker.

- Remember,

he's a real dangerous man.

- That's a 10-4, sir,

good attention, sir, clear.

- Brad, there's a cop car, a sheriffs car,

right over there, and you know what I heard?

I heard them say that John Louis Barker escaped.

- Psycho killer escaped on Halloween night.

Yeah, right.

- I'm scared, J.J., hold my hand.

- I'll break your hand.

- Hey, watch the spurs, that

is new.

- Haw, haw, I'm impressed.

- Come on up, folks, come on all the way up,

don't be scared.

- Listen, I'm not kidding.

I heard the Sherifs radio, they said Barker escaped.

Really, I think that w,

but I don't smoke.

- It's easy, Warren, similar to sucking an exhaust pipe.

- Oh, don't listen to her, Warren,

she doesn't know what she's talking about.

- Come on all the way up, folks,

come on.

- Now, can't no bunch be no bigger'n six.

Now we,

we got, we got, hold on.

- She couldn't hack it.

- Dad, you Sc, scared me!

- You little fart britches.

This is, what?

Third time I've caught you in here.

- Aw, come on, Jerr',

kid's just tryin' to have some fun.

- Eddie, ain't no place for him to be runnin' around.

Hmm? - I was

just tryin' to find ya, daddy,

'cause I - Jerr'.

- Need more money, - Mmm hmm.

- Jerr', another group's comin'.

- Spent it all, on, you know.

- Billy,

last warnin'.

Now hit that back door.

Wait a minute.

Don't forget your woof-woof.

- Woof-woof.

When I was a kid, I wouldn't be caught dead carryin' a doll.

- Aha!

Lower lumbar, needs an adjustment.

How about a little

neck therapy, eh?

Yeah!

- One, two,

- Seven!

- You lose!

- Brad!

- Hey!

Are you gonna get a ticket?

Or are you going to get a ticket?

- Thank you.

- Earth to Warren.

Earth to Warren.

Earth is a planet, Warren,

in the Milky Way galaxy.

You are currently on it.

- Geez, easy, Warren!

You'd best shoot up some freon and refrigerate, dude!

- This is so exciting, Warren.

Halloween night.

The most thrilling holiday.

Christmas is too expensive.

Thanksgiving's for turkeys.

Easter's for anyone who believes rabbits lay eggs.

But Halloween,

creatures of the dark

reign supreme.

Demons,

ghouls,

monsters.

- Excellent.

- Guys, look, what a cute bed.

- Well, I know!

- Hmm. - Terrible.

- That's a nice job, - That's good, yeah.

- With the scythe. - Look at the floor.

- Uh, I like the lungs in the hand,

I give it a five. - Three.

Three from the Russian judge.

- Brad,

I just had a strange thought.

I mean,

about Barker, I mean,

wouldn't it be, like, something, if,

what?

- Come on up, folks, come on all the way up.

Yes, you, come on all the way.

Come on up.

Come on all the way up, don't be scared.

Come on up.

- How's the chainsaw room?

Pretty scary?

- I don't know.

Don't think there is no chainsaw room.

- Heh.

- You're not gonna take advantage of me in there, are you?

- All right, now listen up.

We got some rules, and they're very important.

Can't no bunch be bigger'n six.

Now, we got,

we got four.

All right, now,

you gotta stick together.

I bid y'all to please enter

my Charmin' home.

Good luck.

- This is so exciting, Warren.

- Is Mr. Excitement back there?

Huh?

Speaking of which,

You guys are wussies!

Wussies!

- Hey Jerry, you know what time it is.

- Huh uh.

- It's beer-thirty.

- Mmm, think we got time before the next invasion?

Okay, I'll go scare us up a couple of 'em.

♪ Bom, bom, bom-bom-bom, bom-bom-bom ♪

♪ Buh-buh-bom, buh-buh-bom, bom ♪

Jerr'!

Hey, Jerr', a group's comin'!

- Jerr', get your butt in here!

Jerr', I need your help, help, help me!

Oh, help me, please, help me, I'm in such pain!

Please, please, kill me!

Please!

Help me, help me, please, why did he make me suffer so!

Oh, oh no, oh, oh, it's him!

Save yourselves, save yourselves!

Oh, help me, please, I've suffered,

I can't stand it any longer!

Oh, help me, help me!

- You should be offered an Academy award.

- Oh, help me, please, help me,

I'm in such pain!

Oh, help me, kill me, help me!

Kill me now, I can't take the pain, kill me, please!

- Stop him! - Oh, help me!

I can't take it!

Jerr'?

- Oh!

- Can I get some gravy with that?

- Oh, chop him, mate!

Rip his guts out! - Help him!

- And roll them around the room!

- Come on! - Ah, that guy looks like

Danny Cooseman, dude.

- Had some good lunch. - J.J., come on.

That was great, J.J.

- I've seen better. - Oh yeah, you've seen better?

- Otto!

Watch it with that blade!

- Then stop waving your arms around like that

when I'm swingin'.

- Where's Jerr'?

- Ah, up front, they needed him up front.

Looks like you are getting low

on your blood supply.

Not bad!

- Having fun yet, Warren?

Great, glad to hear it.

- Leave him alone Brad, you're mean.

- God, what is this, PMS room, or what?

Ouch.

Brad.

You guys?

Hello?

- Oh look, it's Captain Fart! - Oh, come on,

you wuss, you're really scared!

- No one would've found him. - Ha ha!

- All right, come on! - Ha, hey, watch it!

The shirt!

C'mon, guy, I'm serious, let go!

- You mean, the John Louis Barker?

- Don't talk so loud.

One thing I don't want to do

is cause hysteria and whatnot.

And what a time for this to happen,

the election and all.

- Aw.

Well, I don't know,

you catch this guy, you could be a hero.

You think about that?

- Mr. Grossman.

- I'll talk atcha later, Jerry.

- Yes, ma'am.

- Dammit.

- I don't want my children seeing all that disgusting

blood 'n guts and stuff in there.

- In the barn, daddy,

I, I saw, - Billy!

I'm real busy, go play somewhere, go on!

Go one, now.

- Halloween is supposed to be for children.

You know, ghosts and goblins,

and pumpkins and candy! - Oh, mom!

- Lady, you got a buncha blood

smeared all over your dress.

- Oh god! - It's not blood.

It's tomato sauce.

- Well, ah, that'll come off in a jiffy.

- Are you sure that's tomato sauce?

- Well, whatever it is, just don't wash it in hot water.

Just watch your rinse cycle and presoak.

Attention shoppers,

today we got the blue light special on

that is the

rounds him up, and heads him out!

- Later days, folks!

- Brad.

Help, somebody, please!

I'm not joking!

- Hello?

- Wouldn't happen to be one of them

troublemakers been jackin' with our equipment?

- No, no, sir, I must've taken a wrong turn, or, or, or,

- Dang right, you took a wrong turn,

"or, or, or."

You got no business bein' back here all alone.

Now turn around and go back where you came from.

- Really not feeling very well.

Oh no.

- It's a Corning Halloween night,

and we've had no reports this year of poison candy

or razor blades buried in fruit.

There's some truly giving people who work in, and support,

this house of horrors.

For just a few dollars,

this place offers more than a few thrills.

And from what they tell me,

you won't come out the same.

Ouch!

- The house is open until midnight, the witching hour.

For Batson's Beat,

this is Suzanne Batson,

KB, KVB, KVDB TV.

Shit, that sucked.

Are we still rolling, Kim?

- Everybody run!

Run!

- Hey, hey, hey! - No!

No, let go! - Whatcha doin'?

The psycho!

He's after me!

You gotta believe me, John Louis Barker, in this house!

- Every Dang year something's gotta happen,

people going in, not coming out, no matter what the hell I...

- Jerry!

Get them house lights up quick.

We got a hell of a problem.

- Better fit him up with a straitjacket.

- Y'all just keep moving.

Kid, I'm gonna have to take you outta here.

- Yes, that's what I want.

- Was he wearin' a hockey mask?

- No, he, he, he was like, kinda, and he, he,

- Attention folks.

Lemme have your attention.

I have an important announcement.

Somethin's happened.

Everybody,

workers too, everybody,

get to the nearest exit and get out.

- I told you. - Everybody.

- I told you!

- Go on, get out!

Right now!

- Hey, hey, come back here, come back here, wait!

This way, this way!

- Dammit.

- But don't run!

Come on, move it along!

Come on, get out!

Let's go, come on! - Oh my God!

- Let's go! - What happened.

- You thinking what I'm thinking, Roy?

Let's go get us

a mental patient.

- Okay, let me pass, let me pass!

- Help me.

- Come on, honey, come on.

- Wait.

- Shit.

Yeoh!

Heh?

- Officer.

Officer, we need help.

We heard that there's this guy at the...

- Yeah, we heard there's some serious shit

going on in there, man, we're worried about this guy,

- It's our friend, Warren, and,

and he got lost. - Hey, lady,

I ain't a cop.

Sorry.

- I knew that!

- Hey Mister!

Will this help?

- No, wait.

- Come on!

It's okay, I know the way.

My daddy works here.

- Hey kid!

- Wait.

- Boo!

- Huh!

- Come on.

- What's the matter?

It's only pretend.

- Y,

Yeah.

Pretend.

Come on.

Wait.

- Hey, watch it, kid, where are you?

Where'd you go?

Help!

Come here!

What, wait, where are you?

Help!

Help!

Help me!

Ahhhh!

Come on!

Please!

Oops.

Ah.

Aaaahhhhh!

Ugh.

Oh.

Ow!

Oh!

Ahoy!

Over here!

Help!

Please!

Over here!

Over here!

Somebody help!

Help!

Help!

Over here!

Over here!

Help!

- I said get the hell back!

- Help!

John Louis Barker!

We know you're in there!

Mr. Barker,

listen up.

Come out!

Raise your hands.

If you do not resist,

nobody's going to get hurt.

- Hold your fire.

Hold your fire.

- Barker shoot at you, son?

Did you shoot?

You shot Barker?

This way.

Be all right.

- Y'all get on back.

Get outta the way.

- Step back. - Get back outta the way.

- Let's get back outta here. - Warren, what happened, man?

- Get back outta the way, stay outta the way.

- I shot him.

- He gonna be okay?

- He kept coming.

He just kept coming.

I cut his hand off.

- Wait a minute.

- Okay.

- Who's got the hand?

We got the ice.

Holt, you got that?

Come on, c'mon, c'mon.

- There ya go.

- Take it easy, Otto.

Barker do this?

- Tried to catch,

catch some kid.

Troublemaker.

I just wanted kick him out.

- We found him inside, unconscious,

bleedin' real bad 'n I thought,

Marvin, what the hell's goin' on here, anyway?

- Yeah, we're sure.

It's Barker, all right.

Found him about a quarter mile

East of Prince's gas station.

Taylor?

Hey Taylor.

Are you there?

- Hey, shine that light over here.

The sheriff.

- He's been shot.

Somebody better go tell Taylor.

- I couldn't get out.

He just kept coming.

- Do you even understand?

You didn't shoot Barker.

You shot Briggs.

Sheriff Pat Briggs.

- Mr. Patrick.

- Barker wasn't even near this place.

He sure as hell wasn't in there.

- He just kept coming

and coming.

And coming.

- I'm arrestin' you for involuntary manslaughter.

- That's okay. - You have the right

to remain silent and not make any statement whatsoever.

But if you do, anything you say can and will be used

against you in a court of law.

- Ah. - You have the right

to an attorney.

If you can't afford one, one'll be afforded for ya.

D'ya understand your rights, as I read 'em to ya?

- Thank you.

- This is so exciting, Warren.

The most thrilling holiday.

Halloween night.