Original subtitles

Hey Jamaal.

Randy man, maestro of Vanilla Icetro.

What's happening my friend?

Hey Judy.

Judy on duty.

High priestess of the ball and bat.

Hi Randy, hi Jamaal.

You want to come over?

I'll come by later after practice.

Cool.

See ya.

Later home plater.

That girl is hot.

Did the all seeing eyes of the Jamaalster

sense some certain love vibrations in the air?

Me and Judy?

No way man, we're just friends.

Come on, let's roll.

Come here Mason, I want to talk to you.

Follow me, Randy.

Jamaal, what are you doing?

You're dead.

Come back here, Mason.

It's showdown by the great Jamaal.

They cracking the beat,

but they put the brain by variance.

Are you crazy, Jamaal?

He could have creamed you.

Elementary Jamaalics, man.

Physics and psychology.

He's bigger but I'm coming at him

full momentum.

We collide.

It's gonna hurt him a lot more than it hurts me.

See you, Jamaal.

Later Randy.

Randy.

I'm glad you got here in time for me to say goodbye.

Hi dad.

Here you go.

Thanks.

I'll be gone three or four days max, okay.

Here you go, thank you.

Have a good trip.

Thanks.

Take care of mom, okay.

I'll call you later tonight.

I love you son.

Airport please.

Hi sweetheart, I'm sorry.

I've got to work a little late.

They want us to finish this ad campaign today, so

I should be back by seven.

There's some brown rice and veggies in the fridge.

Just nuke them in the microwave when you get hungry.

See you later sweetheart.

Thanks, Gunter.

Recycle that, geekster.

Ms. Puerto Vallarta, Tiffany Anne,

relaxing here on the fabulous jet set playground--

The Fajitas twins gave us a wonderful opportunity

to enjoy,

the scent of food miles away.

Ms. Chihuahua, a nuclear physics major from Harvard--

They're on the go in the know.

Our Ivy league girls of the bikini network.

And in the next

phase of this trial,

we will aggressively--

money on--

This young professor from--

Two weeks.

Our sermon today, brothers and sisters,

is a story of David and Goliath.

Hallelujah,

brother Milo.

Praise the lord.

Cut it out Mason.

What the?

You're gonna pay for that, Mason.

Easy, Bluedo.

We won't hurt you boy.

Whoa, he looks like a mutant or something.

Turkey dogs.

You sure no workmen come around here anymore?

Positive.

My mom knows Ms. Williams, the real estate lady.

Oh, I know her.

She's weird.

Come on.

This is the coolest hideout.

You haven't told anyone, have you?

What do I look like?

A dweeb?

No.

Well, shouldn't we do what we came up here to do?

Sure.

What happened?

I wiped out. Have to go down and turn my car over.

Well let me see if I can help you out.

You're incredible Randy.

I've been modifying the controls

to give it more aerobatic capabilities.

You're funny Randy.

What did you do that for?

I don't know.

I felt like it.

My plane.

The end of the street, about 300 yards

is the range limit for the radio signal.

We almost lost control.

Yeah.

We sure did.

Anybody home?

Three men suspected of robbing a local

convenience store

are still at large tonight

somewhere in the Southland.

Though no one was injured

in what is being described as

a bumbled robbery attempt,

police warn that the three should be considered

armed and dangerous.

♪ This time of season

♪ I'm always happy for no reason ♪

♪ The bigger sun shining down on me ♪

♪ The sweet little melody

Hallelujah, brother Milo.

Praise the lord.

Hi doll.

Hey mom.

Whatcha been doing?

Nothing.

How was school today?

Okay.

Did your dad get off alright?

Yeah.

Any messages?

Nope.

Randy, you are definitely the strong silent type.

And if anyone every tries to say you're not,

just

don't say anything.

Your old mom's got some good news.

The new ad campaign finally made it

up to the creative director.

Did he like your drawings?

Loved them.

Way to go, mom.

That's not all.

They liked it so much they promoted me

to associate art director.

What's that mean?

It means more money, Randy.

It means you're never gonna have to fix

that rattle trap bike of yours again

because your father and I are buying you a new one

this weekend.

And that old Volkswagen out there,

history.

Maybe we'll buy a

Porsche or something.

No, no, no, no.

A jeep.

Oh, that'll be your dad.

Hello.

Hi honey.

Good news.

Well, the new ad campaign finally made it up

to the creative director.

Loved it.

No, liked it so much they promoted me

to associate art director.

Featuring the Southland's number one anchorman,

Wally White.

Good evening.

Witnesses at the scene of today's bungled robbery

of a local convenience store

described the hold up

as a comedy of errors.

Which the robbers appeared confused and poorly organized.

The suspects are still at large tonight,

and should be considered armed and dangerous.

Payback time, butt head.

My zero.

Quiet.

You're zero's history.

Thanks for leaving your window open, Mason.

You got to learn not to be so trusting.

Here's the deal,

I want to borrow this baby for a couple days.

Give me the remote control.

I don't have it.

Bull.

Really, my mom keeps them locked up.

Well go get it, butt head.

I can't.

My mom's in there.

Then bring it to school tomorrow.

I can't bring a model to school.

Okay, lameo, I'm bringing the model.

You're just bringing the control.

And make sure the batteries are good too.

Listen, Ben,

it took me four months to build that plane.

It's really delicate.

Ever seen plastic melt?

I have.

Makes a real stinky black smoke.

It looks real great, you know.

As the wings wrinkle up,

and the nose melts down to a flaming puddle.

Hey, I'll show you right now over in my yard.

Randy?

Who are you,

Ben.

What are you doing here?

Good evening Mrs. Mason.

Randy's being real nice,

helping me with my homework.

That's my Randy.

Well, I'll leave you two boys to it then.

I think he's the cutest guy.

Let me be the one to fly it.

I'll teach you how.

Don't worry, man.

I know what I'm doing.

Now class,

Jamaal has been working on his project

for quite some time now.

And today he's going to be demonstrating

some of the properties of inertia.

So please welcome Jamaal,

excuse me,

the Jamaalster.

Inertia, what is it?

What does it do?

And what's in it for us?

We all know that objects in motion

tend to remain in motion.

And objects at rest tend to remain at rest.

Now comes the latest development

in the science of technology,

the inertia mobile.

Now Newton's first law of motion

tells us that an object in motion

tends to move in a--

Now the MC of relativity himself says

that E equals M C squared.

And Newton's third law says

that for every action,

there's an equal and opposite reaction.

The inertia mobile's carefully constructed system

of springs

allows us to see the principles of

Tony and McAnns--

Mr. Mason, what seems to be the problem?

E equals M C squared.

Mr. Mason,

please return to your seat.

What the.

Mr. Mason, I need your attention.

Please remain.

Everyone stay under your desks.

Jamaal, look out.

Oh no.

Everybody don't panic.

Don't panic.

The trio of would be robbers

who have alluded authorities

since yesterday's bungled convenience store robbery.

The suspects were last seen

driving a stolen white minivan.

Randy, are you there?

The school called.

I understand you crashed a plane

into Jamaal's science project.

Needless to say, I'm a little upset here.

When I get home young man,

I'm going to confiscate every model in the house.

It's time we established some new rules.

Hi, you've reached the home of Brent, Marti,

and Randy Mason.

Leave a message at the tone.

Randy, are you home yet?

Call me at the office right away.

I've never known anyone who got expelled before.

Hey, whatcha doing?

My mom's threatening to confiscate

every model in the house.

So I'm taking them to the hideout

until things cool down.

Why don't you just tell the truth.

I mean it wasn't your fault.

It was Ben's.

I know.

But if I tell on him,

he'll just make my life more miserable.

And plus, it was sort of my fault.

Just help me get them there, will ya?

Okay.

But you know,

you're just making it worse.

I helped you get them here.

I gotta go now.

Don't you want to come up?

I got a game tonight.

Are you coming?

Yeah.

I almost forgot.

Judy, you're not mad at me are you?

No.

But I do think you're acting like a five year old.

Hey, Del,

where you going?

This is a dead end here.

Shut up.

I'm hungry. I thought we was stopping for donuts.

No donuts, Lewis.

Cops hang out at donut stands.

Shut up.

Model home,

opening soon.

Like our own personal chalet in the Alps.

Wow, this is a real pretty house.

Good doggy, good doggy.

good dog.

Del, help.

Give him the candy bar.

But, it's mine.

Do it Louis.

That's bad luck, the ladder bad luck.

Maybe we can get in through here.

Ritchie, break this window pane.

You know what, Del,

you're really starting to bug me.

You are way too bossy.

What about the burglar alarm, huh Del?

Just shut up, will you Louis. I know about burglar alarms.

I just got to check out where the sensors are.

Now do it Ritchie.

Do it Louis.

Oh, okay.

Get the ladder, bean head.

Well, well, well,

looks like we're moving up in the world.

Don't touch anything

until I check out the alarm.

That looks good.

Hey, it's glued down.

Yo, Del,

everything's fake.

The whole joint's fake.

Water works.

- Hey, Ritchie, look out. - Yeah, bring it on in.

I got it.

Hey Louis,

why don't you help yourself to some cake there pal.

It's fake Ritchie.

Don't touch anything.

Oh, I live this

cooking island.

Come on, big guy, let's go.

Oh, nice living room.

Yeah, it's not bad.

No, no.

What, what?

There's alarm pads under this carpet.

We'll use the ladder for a bridge.

Come through here.

No, no, no, through here.

Ritchie, open the garage door

and bring the van in.

You want me to close the door after?

Yeah, I want you to close the door after.

Jesus, do I have to spell everything out for you guys?

You know wouldn't do much good anyways

for Ritchie here cause he can't spell.

That's not true.

I can too.

- You cannot. - Shut up and do it.

You know, this I the first time

I'm ever building a bridge Del.

Although I have crossed a couple.

Shut up.

Hey Del, why don't you shut that off?

I had a cellmate who installed these systems.

Once it's on, you can't shut it off

without a combination okay.

Okay.

Give me the cigarettes.

Here you go.

What are you doing?

You can feel the sensors under the carpet.

I'm gonna mark the spots where it's safe to walk.

Oh this is fun.

Careful Del.

I know what I'm doing.

It takes at least 30 pounds to set one of these babies off.

Oh, nice bathroom too.

Ritchie do this.

Ritchie do that. Next time I'm gonna get my own gang.

No Del.

No Louis.

Just nobody.

This whole carpet

is crisscrossed with sensors.

Just step on the cigarette packs

and we'll be cool.

That's it.

We're okay now.

You know, it's not so bad here.

I think I'm just gonna stay.

Come on down big guy.

Just step on the packs.

Trust me.

Okay.

Oh this is fun.

This is like a palace.

Oh man, no food.

Oh, a cookbook.

Hey, Del.

How long we got to hold up here?

I don't know,

til the cops give up on the roadblocks.

- Three or four days maybe. - Three or four days?

You know, I wish I never met you Del.

Hey, the feeling's mutual.

If you hadn't left the money

at the comic book rack,

we would have been rich by now.

It was a new issue of D Man,

I was just checking it out.

We're robbing the store.

You could have stole it.

Don't yell at him.

That's my cousin.

Shut up.

I'm hungry.

Eat a candy bar.

I ate them all.

Alright, I'll go to the supermarket.

Do me good to get away from you boneheads for a minute.

Give me some money.

Hey, can you get me some ice cream?

That fudge ripple?

Get the new peanut butter crunch.

I love that.

I'm walking.

It'll melt.

Oh yeah.

Okay, if I'm not back in an hour,

you guys are on your own.

Hey Del, you wouldn't ditch us, would you?

Just don't do anything stupid, okay.

Him?

Don't turn on any lights.

Don't look out the window.

I'll be back.

What if someone finds us?

Take them hostage.

I can't believe you hooked us up with that sleazeball.

Easy Louis, easy.

Tiptoe my friend.

Tiptoe.

I'm gonna own a house like this some day.

In your dreams, homeboy.

I'm gonna take a shower, Louis.

Louis' house.

House of Louis.

Casa de Louis.

Hi, Mr. Gorman.

Mrs. Williams here at Milton Kraft Realty.

You're canceling the appointment?

Well, what seems to be the problem?

Not even the model home?

I could show you that and you'd see how cheery

and comfy.

Well, alright.

Maybe next time.

Bye.

Dammit.

Hi, Karen, how's the office?

Do I have any more appointments?

Good.

Listen Karen,

that nut client canceled on Valley View.

Honestly Karen, I don't know why I bother

to come out here anymore.

No, I don't have to check for vandalism.

That's what West tech is for.

Listen, I'll see you at the office.

You won't see Eva McKinley Williams around here again

for a long, long time.

Come back Huey.

I almost lost you there.

Ladies and gentlemen,

boys and girls,

for one night only, it's Ritchie Marinelli.

♪ She wore a tight skirt

♪ Oh ew oh ew blonde hair beauty ♪

♪ I love her, Louis

Thank you.

♪ Oh Yankee doodle went to town ♪

♪ His name was Frankieni

♪ He wanted some fun really bad ♪

♪ So he had some tortellini

♪ Yankee doodle blah blah blah

♪ Yankee doodle doobie doo

♪ Yankee doodle

♪ Cracked a smile

Thank you very much.

Oh man,

that towel was glued to the towel racks.

What are you doing?

Yodeling in your sleep?

Yes.

Watch the alarms.

I'm watching the alarms.

What's happening?

I don't know, but it hurts.

It hurts.

Look out.

Here, get to the couch.

Get off me.

A tack?

What is this?

Your idea of a joke?

No, you were right the first time. That's a tack.

Hey, I'm home.

Give me my gun.

Say please.

Give me my gun.

Here you go.

Oh boy, food.

Oh, chiffon.

Paper plates, oh, that's class, Del.

Styrofoam.

That's not recyclable.

Well, we're not gonna eat it.

Hey Del,

- why'd you buy the bike for? - I didn't buy the bike, stud.

I found it outside.

There must be a kid around here.

Well you don't think the kid saw us?

How am I supposed to know?

Hey Del, mellow out

would you look at this thing.

It's a piece of junk.

Don't worry, somebody dumped it.

Yeah, well let's everybody keep an eye out.

You see somebody, let's grab them.

Flame kissed sirloin

by chef Louis,

the specialty of the house.

Hey Louis,

you want some of this

gourmet blend French mocha stuff?

No, just hot cocoa for me please, Ritchie.

You got it.

This one's for Del.

Ritchie, you kill me.

Oh boy.

Del,

dinner time.

Yo, Del, let's go.

It's time to eat.

Del.

Come on Del, we're starving.

Del.

Manhunt continues in the Southland.

You're listening to Radio 980.

Del, din din's ready.

Let's go Del,

the food's getting cold in there.

Quiet.

Our top story this hour.

The three bumbling robbers

who left the cash behind

remain at large this evening

despite roadblocks throughout the city.

Police have identified one of the suspects

as Delbert Macoy of Pacoima.

Delbert.

You're real name's Delbert.

Shut up.

Man, I feel sorry for you.

Here I been thinking the whole time that you was named

after Del Shannon,

the rock and roll star,

but no, you--

My name's Del.

It's Del.

Don't ever call me Bert.

lighten up

and lay off the shirt.

Hey come on you two.

Can't we just have a nice dinner for once?

Sorry Louis.

Thank you Ritchie.

Hey Del,

no hard feelings alright.

I apologize, okay.

Yeah, okay.

You guys go on in. I'll be in there in a minute.

Right, you got it.

Del.

Delbert, what a stupid name.

Yeah me too.

Well I'm not waiting for him. I'm eating right now.

I can't wait.

Oh, Twinkies.

Hey, hey, what's the deal here.

Ow, you fart face.

Who you calling fart face?

- You swiped my steak or what? - You hit me in the head

with a freaking beans.

I did not.

You did too.

I did not.

You got bean juice all over my shirt.

I did not.

You did too.

You could have cracked my head open, Louis.

I swear I didn't.

I got you Louis,

I got you Louis.

What are you losers doing?

It's not me, Del.

It's him.

It's his fault.

- It is not. - It is too.

It is not.

What's the problem?

That my steak, it disappeared, Del.

Get over there.

It was right there on my plate.

You ate that steak, didn't you Louis.

No.

Don't you lie to me.

You got a big piece of meat stuck in your tooth there.

Well, I just had one bite

just to see if it was done.

Yeah right.

Well what about the beans, then, huh Ritchie?

Just free bean me with them.

- I did not. - You did too.

- Did not. - Did too.

Well you ain't gonna get any of mine.

Mine neither.

Don't just stand there,

clean up this mess.

Hi, you've reached the home

of Brent, Marti, and Randy Mason.

Leave a message at the tone.

Randy,

I'm at the game.

Where are you?

Randy?

Thursday night.

You're at the Jay's game.

Randy, are you there?

The school called.

Randy, are you home yet?

Randy, you home yet honey?

Listen,

I was a little angry--

Hi gang, me here.

Sorry honey.

Randy,

I'm at the game.

Where are you?

Randy?

Hi, you've reached the Riley's.

If you have a message for Jim, Wendy,

Judy or Heather, speak now.

Hi guys, it's Marti.

Listen, I'm kind of worried about Randy.

Call me as soon as you get home.

Would you please?

Thanks.

♪ I'm a walking blah blah blah

♪ Blah blah blah

♪ Shoobey doo

♪ Blah blah shoobey dooby

♪ Dooby

Shut up.

What are you doing?

I'm singing to myself.

Why don't you mind your own business?

Yeah, well somebody might hear you.

Oh yeah, right.

Look at this, look at this.

This is so beautiful.

I want to have some place like this.

Eh, too much fresh air

gives me a headache.

Place like this

makes a man feel like

he's king of his castle.

See that kickboxing match the other night?

Good match though.

It's a good match.

It's a good sport.

Should get into it.

I got some friends, kick box.

I'm a kick boxer.

I'd like to do it some day.

It's not like Randy at all.

He's a great kid.

I mean

was I too hard on him?

Do I seem like a terrible mother?

Try to stay calm, Mrs. Mason.

We'll find him.

Sometimes pressures build up

and kids just have to express it somehow.

Pressures?

What pressures?

What do you mean pressures?

Well, with his father gone.

He's not gone.

He's working.

And the trouble at school.

It's just not like him at all.

Best thing for you to do is stay here

by the phone.

We'll keep in touch.

Okay.

Thank you officers.

Is everything alright, Marti?

Well,

actually,

Ben,

have you seen Randy lately?

Not since he crashed his plane

into Jamaal's inertia mobile

and got expelled, Mrs. Mason.

You lying to her?

You better be telling the truth.

It's the truth, ma.

I threatened to take his models away.

I was so mad.

Do you think I was too hard on him?

If my Ben had done what your boy did,

I'd have whooped I'm upside the head.

If he knows anything,

I'll get it out of him Marti.

Alright, butt head,

what's going on?

Strike three, you're out.

Great game sweetheart.

I've never seen a little league game

go so many extra innings.

I'm exhausted.

Come on gang, let's go.

No post game pizza tonight.

Come on sweetie.

Come on you guys.

You got to help me.

Here's your wake up.

It's your turn to watch.

Oh man.

I was dreaming about,

now I can't remember.

Let's just leave the kitchen til morning.

Excellent idea

I just want to go to bed.

Del.

Del.

There's a patrol car coming.

He's stopping, what do we do?

What's he doing?

Looks like he's radioing somebody.

Oh man.

Oh man.

Ritchie.

He's eating a donut.

Donuts sounds good now.

Shut up.

Hi you guys, it's Marti.

Listen, I'm kind of worried about Randy.

Call me as soon as you get home,

would you please?

Hello?

Marti.

Judy.

Is Randy with you?

No.

What's wrong?

Where did you see him last?

At school.

Judy,

where else might he be?

Sweetheart this is serious.

He could be hurt or

god knows what.

Oh my gosh, there's the police.

Judy, hang on a minute.

Did you find him?

Not yet ma'am.

Any word here?

I've got his friend Judy on the phone.

Judy,

Judy.

She hung up.

Del.

Del, come quick.

Someone's coming.

Don't you ever yell at me like that when I'm peeing.

Yeah, but someone's coming Del.

Look, she's coming this way.

What if she finds us?

Get out of my way.

Hey Louis, let's go.

Randy?

Randy?

Randy can you hear me?

Don't worry kid, we're not gonna hurt you.

I'm warning you,

I'm the number one home run hitter

three years in a row.

Hey, you're those guys the police are looking for.

No, no, no.

We're just carpenters doing some finishing work.

Oh no, Del, look, they got the army after us.

Yeah, we're busted big time. Let's get out of here.

That's not the army, that's a toy model.

Randy?

Ow, stop it.

Put in the van.

Come on, let's go.

Open the door, Louis.

Come on kid, get in here. We're not gonna hurt you.

Just mellow out.

Stop it.

Put her in the car.

Hey, were you really the home run hitter

- for three years in a row? - Let me go.

Alright, I believe you, get in.

Come on kid,

put the seatbelt on.

Put your seatbelt on kid.

Let's go Louis, let's go.

Open the garage.

I know, I know.

Uh oh, Ritchie something's wrong.

Oh, for crud's sakes.

Come on kid, let's go.

Open up kid.

Open up kid.

Open up.

I'm coming.

I'm coming kid.

The kid's here.

I'm gonna get you.

Hey, get the van out here.

It's not our fault, Del.

The door got stuck.

I'm coming.

I'm coming kid.

Here I am.

Hey, you okay?

Del?

No, I'm not okay.

There's a door to the attic I the back hall.

Bust it open and grab that kid.

No.

Right Del.

What do we need those kids for anyway?

To get through the roadblocks, idiot.

For bargaining chips.

You know, I got bargain chips

at the discount supermarket once.

They weren't near as good as Lays.

You know, they say it's a bargain,

but it really isn't.

Shut up.

Do it.

Come on kid.

Unlock the door.

My name's Louis.

I won't hurt you.

I'm a nice guy.

Come on kid.

Don't make me work so hard.

Come on kid.

You got to be pretty smart

to get away from Louis, kid.

Ah, Ritchie.

Come on with your hands up, kid.

We got your surrounded.

Randy, get away.

Ritchie, get the ladder

and get him down from there.

What are you crazy

after what happened to you?

Do it yourself.

I'm the leader of the gang now,

you do what I tell you.

- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. - Excuse me for saying so, but

you have bad taste in partners.

Come on kid, let's get out of here.

Get out of here.

Let me go.

Oh, oh, oh no.

Hey, don't do that to Del. Don't kick Del.

He's a nice guy.

Gee, Del,

you okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

Hey, break it up you two.

Get off of me dog.

Let go of me.

Del.

Louis.

Help.

Let me out of here.

Let me out.

Del.

Del, help me.

- Let me go, you big dummy. - Don't call me that.

Alright, kid, this is your last chance.

That's a very close shave, Del.

You.

No.

Okay.

Give me the gun little girl.

Give me the gun now honey.

Come on.

I was also the number one pitcher

three years in a row.

That's it,

I've had it up to here with you kids.

That was incredible, Randy.

Yeah, it was.

You didn't tell did you?

No.

I'm in big trouble aren't I?

You're either that or a hero.

Randy.

What is going on here young man?

Randy.

Are you alright?

Yeah.

I'm okay.

What's going on here folks?

A $110 a month

we pay for your service,

and I'm the first to arrive on the scene.

What is your badge number sir?

Everyone just calm down, please.

I'll take over here sir.

Okay, now what's going on here folks?

Bluedo.

Bad boy.

I've been looking all over for you.

Where have you been?

Shame on you running away from mommy like that.

Son, we've got two suspects here.

Do you know anything,

anything at all about the third?

Louis.

I give up.

I give up.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Hold it right there sir.

Get in the car.

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Get your hands up.

Put them over your head.

Come on, keep moving.

Keep moving.

Keep moving.

Keep moving

keep moving.

Right straight towards that car.

Come on, get in the car.

Alright, get on with it.

There goes our secret hide out.

Yeah.

That's okay, we'll find a new one.