Original subtitles

[MUSIC PLAYING]

YANNA: Gork, do you really think we should have left Xena alone?

What if she gets into some trouble?

Don't worry, Yanna.

Everything will be fine.

Besides, what kind of trouble could she possibly get into?

I trust her explicitly.

Now more than ever since she dumped that geekazoid, Gonad.

Yeah, you're right.

But I still can't help worrying.

You know the old saying, it's a mother's prerogative.

Yeah. How could I forget?

[INAUDIBLE] Yanna, my little nebula of love,

we got three whole days without having

to listen to teenage gossip on the telatransmitor.

And not having to wait in line to use the fecal matter

neutralizer.

And, oh, I want to stop off at this way station 36.

to get some of the special fuel additive for the t-bird ship.

When you've got a beauty like my t-bird ship

you want it to run with maximum performance.

Hell, you never even drive it.

Yanna, you know that's not true.

Just yesterday I took it for a spin

and used nearly a full tank of fuel.

That's why I need the additive.

YANNA: You think more about that ship than you think about me.

GORK: It's just that I've spent so much time

restoring the ship I want it to run right, MY

little ring of Saturn.

That does it.

This the last time I'll ever marry a man 30 years

younger than I am.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Don't mind us.

We want to borrow some of your stuff.

You make the best garments.

Yeah, very chic for the fashionable Desquizian

teenager of today.

I'm so flattered.

If you sold these in stores you'd be rich.

I'd have money, but no boyfriend.

No boyfriend is better than Gonad.

Believe me.

Yeah, he's a mega-space degree geekazoid.

And he probably has a small cranial capacity.

Cheer up.

Boys are like from another planet, anyways.

Who understand them?

Yeah, can't live with them, can't disintegrate

them with a gamma death ray.

Yeah, I know.

Guess I just need to forget about him.

I need to meet someone new. - I'm bored.

Let's do something.

Like go to Astro-burger?

Boring.

What about Alpha miniature golf.

You've got to be kidding.

Hey, we could cruise Delta Alpha 43 solar system.

Isn't that where planet Beta 45 is?

No way, guys.

That's off limits to everybody.

Know what would happen if we got caught there?

We'd be in big trouble.

Are there boys there?

I don't know.

Besides, we don't even have a ship to cruise in.

No, you can't be serious.

Your parental units are away for three whole days.

Absolutely not.

They'll never know if you use their ship.

They're parents.

They're telepathic about these things.

- Whoa. - Hey, keep out of there.

This is a rare vintage model.

Wow, a t-bird ship.

With black-hole compressor nanoplasm drive,

delta-enriched fueled carbs, four on the floor,

and the greatest stereo this side of Arcticus.

Xena, does your dad take you for rides in this?

He never takes us anywhere.

We'd have every guy in the galaxy checking us out.

Yeah, to check out the ship.

- Can we take a ride? - No.

Ah, come on. Please?

Nothing's going to happen.

I promise.

I don't even have the magnetic starter strip.

OK.

Just to Beta-45 and straight back.

Five, four, three, two, one.

[INAUDIBLE]

Slow down.

You worry too much.

So what do you think these Betonian boys look like?

If there are any there.

What I want them to look like is, lots of muscles,

piercing eyes, hairless, cheekbones,

and a big cranial capacity.

What about you, Luna?

He's got to be smart, a scientist,

concerned with the environment.

He's gotta be handsome, trimmed, and have a--

A big cranial capacity.

What about you, Xena?

Well, he's got to be artistic, sensitive, passionate.

He's got his [INAUDIBLE].

Definitely has to be well traveled.

Most important, he's got to be very down to Vasquez nature.

LUNA: And his cranial capacity?

Is that all you ever think about?

Well, yeah, most of the time.

How far away do you think we are?

About five light years, I think.

That's all?

It's practically right around the corner.

Oh, no.

I think my dad forgot to fill up the auxiliary fuel points.

You didn't check?

And here's Beta 45.

This is not a good place to [INAUDIBLE]..

Right. Lock your windows.

You never know who will come crawling around.

Dave, I'm really glad you let me come out with you, man.

You're my best buddy.

Who else would I come with?

Wow.

California.

I can't believe we're almost there.

Yes.

Now you're sure it's OK to stay with your uncle?

Yeah, Uncle Ben is the coolest.

I hope I run into that big kahunas guy.

He's a hero to me.

He's a man amongst men, a legend.

His legacy has guided me on my journey to manhood.

What journey?

You're 18 years old.

You barely know what life is about.

And you made this crazy decision about your life

based on some mythical guy.

A guy can dream, can't he?

What's happening?

[SCREAMING]

LUNA: What are we going to do?

Hold on, guys.

Did you see that?

What?

That light?

It was probably a plane or something, man.

- It's not a plane. - Dave, no.

Do not start with that UFO stuff again, man.

It's too kooky.

That was a UFO.

Yeah, I'd like to be abducted by alien space babies

and have close encounters of the 69th kind.

You've got a total preoccupation with sex.

My achy back.

Hey, I offered to drive, Dave, man.

Thanks.

I wanted to get here in one piece.

[KNOCKING]

Uncle Bud?

Hey, Uncle Bud?

Dave, he's probably asleep.

Let's go check out the beach.

Come on.

Wow. It's the pacific ocean.

It looks just as big as Lake Michigan.

Yeah.

That's Uncle Bud.

Come on.

Hey.

Davey!

Bud.

All right.

You finally made it, huh? - Yeah.

- OK. - Hey, this is Jerry.

Hey.

Mr. Elrick, how you doing?

Don't call him Mr. Elrick.

And don't call me late for lunch.

Uncle Bud. - Uncle Bud.

Oh, wow.

You surf?

Hell yeah.

I still get out now and again.

But now I'm more into cosmic surfing.

Well, you know, meditating, jogging on the beach,

living a healthy life, eating good food, chasing a girl

every now and then.

You see, the trick is positive thinking, yeah?

Positive thinking.

You just don't worry about anything.

I mean, it's not worth it.

I'm worrying about going to college.

About college, about jobs, about making the car payment.

I mean, people don't realize how happy

they can be with so little.

I mean, they're into--

their int0 what?

Big houses, and big cars, and expensive wardrobe.

It doesn't mean anything.

People are funny.

He's pretty cool for being your uncle.

Hey, thanks.

You fellow's hungry?

Yeah, we're starved.

Well, all right.

Come on.

Come on in.

XENA: Oh, man.

Are you guys OK?

Yeah.

Yeah.

XENA: Oh, my parents are going to ship me

to the Death Star for this one.

LUNA: You should have checked the fuel before we left.

What I should have done is not listen to you.

SOLA: Girls, girls.

Let's not argue about this.

Let's just figure a way out of here.

You're right.

Great. Communicator's out.

Let's check out Beta-45.

I mean, we're here.

The Earth's supposed to be safe,

but let's check to be sure.

Oxygen, nitrogen, some hydrocarbons, sulfur.

It's a little polluted, but we can breath.

Come on. Let's go.

I made this lifestyle choice a long time ago.

Used to be I felt terrible.

I'd do that-- I'd do that red mean.

I'd do dairy products.

I'd surf in nasty beaches.

Now I have changed my life.

I'll probably live to be 100.

Got another eviction notice for you, Bud.

Ooh, Hassler.

Just put it in the circular bin with the rest of them,

will you?

Who are these two?

This is my nephew, David.

And this is his friend Jerry.

This is Hassler.

Welcome to California.

That's nothing to worry about, right?

Exactly.

Look, why don't you fellas go down to the beach

down there, will you?

I got a little business I got to take care of.

Is there anything we can do to help?

There is.

You can go down to that water.

You can enjoy yourself, have a good time, chase some girls.

Enjoy California, OK?

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Jerry, man, be cool.

It's like you haven't seen a girl before.

Pinch me and tell me I'm dreaming.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

What are you doing?

I don't want to get sunburned.

If you're smart you'd put some on.

No, I don't need no stinking lotion, man.

You know, that girl over there is going to eat her heart out,

buddy. - OK, Mr. Sun God.

No, sir.

That's Apollo to you.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey.

Hey, you were right, man. The chicks dig you.

Thanks.

Man, this place is incredible.

While you were sleeping this girl

walked by and winked at me.

No, she probably had something in her eye, Dave.

Anyway, I'm thirsty.

Let's get something to drink.

This place is really hot. - Sure.

DR. VEG: Here you go, sweetheart.

Thank you.

How can I help you guys? - Hey.

Yeah, can I get a Coke and a cheeseburger?

We don't serve animal products or raw sugar here.

Listen, I'm allergic to anything with vegetables in it.

Pizza?

I could make you one with soy cheese on ciabatta.

I'll have one of those.

And how about a glass of water?

You got it.

Could I get one of those, too, please?

- You got it. - Thank you.

I'll have the usual.

One teriyaki tofu burrito coming up.

Food for the soul, man.

Yeah, whatever.

There you go boys.

Hey, thanks, man.

Put it on my tab, OK?

Do you want this on this year's tab or last year's tab?

Whatever, man.

Dr. Veg is a genius.

He was a full professor at MIT in Physics.

We used his propulsion system in the space shuttle.

Where you guys staying?

My Uncle Bud's, down the beach.

Wow.

You're Bud's nephew?

Why didn't you say so?

Yeah, Bud, he's a heavy dude for an old guy.

Thanks, Zig.

Bud and I are the same age.

Old guy, I've never been called that before.

Who are you looking at?

Who are those people with Bud down there?

You didn't know that Bud's nephew

came into town for the summer?

It's too bad he won't have any place to stay after I

get done with his uncle.

You know, I just don't think you're serious about getting

that dead beat off the beach.

Let me do it my way and we'll have him in jail.

Let's do it legally.

I've known him for a long time.

He's a neighbor.

Well, that takes forever.

The contest is in three days.

Well, if Sun Bun likes your designs

and invests in your company, uses their Marketing Cloud.

Well, the sky is the limit.

But if you don't win, you could go under.

Unfortunately, you're right.

Of course I am.

Would you mind if I sat in on your catalog photo session?

[MUSIC PLAYING]

This is a swimsuit catalog shoot, not hustler.

I am just capturing their essential essence.

I'm making a statement here about saving the ocean,

the rural ecosystem, and--

Jack, just shoot what I tell you to shoot.

Say, do you have a list of their phone numbers?

What for?

They might need some representation,

some counseling, maybe some guidance.

Hassler, on your own time.

Oh, you-- oh, that's good.

Yeah.

Up with your chest. Up.

Stomach's in.

Love the camera.

I'm beat.

Let's walk around those rocks over there.

Maybe we'll run into some Betonians.

I hope they haven't all died or something.

What I wouldn't give for a drink right now.

What you do it with Gonad for a drink?

You're sick.

What are you going to do if we run into Betonians?

Run like hell.

I heard if they catch you, they cook you and eat you.

Stop it. Why?

Are you scared?

No.

Don't they say when your vehicle breaks down you're

supposed to stay with it?

It's a little late for that.

Babes out here are easy to figure out, man.

It's like, you just ignore them.

Don't even try to understand them.

It's like they're from another planet.

What do you mean?

You see, out here, they're all amazing looking.

I mean, all of them.

They're a dime a dozen.

It's all in your attitude.

Is there, like, a walk or something?

Something like this.

[LAUGHTER]

Kind of like that?

It's cool.

You guys will get it.

These are very interesting specimens, the Betonians.

What are they doing?

Ingesting nutrients and doing some sort of mating rituals.

They're not the most graceful bunch.

[LAUGHTER]

Did you hear something?

It must be the Santa Ana winds.

They're kind of cute.

I wonder if they eat?

I'd hate to be lunch.

I think we should talk to them.

Sola.

What if they take us captive?

So anyway, you guys be cool.

You'll get some girls.

Hi, beta boys.

Whoa.

Be still my beating heart.

I'm with my friends and our vehicle ran out of fuel.

And we got a little lost.

I'll say.

Is your vehicle a submarine?

No, it's a spaceship.

Shut up.

California is a great place.

DAVEY: You guys want to hang out with us?

I mean, my uncle has a place here.

Sure.

Having a place on the beach will do it every time.

They're kind of cute for beta's.

Is your settlement that way?

You could call it that.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Why is your skin so red?

Well, like I was on this wave the size of a house.

I crashed right through the tube and I hit it really hard.

I thought I was going to die.

These tattoos are an ancient Sumarian symbol of manhood.

That's very exciting.

So where are you girls from?

You got some kind of accent.

We're exchange students.

Yeah, it's like-- it's like Swedish or something.

Yeah, that's it.

We're Swedish. - Cool.

Om.

What's he doing?

Meditating.

It's clearing away bad vibes and distractions.

Hey, Davey.

Well, look at you.

First day in California and you're looking like a native.

Xena, Sola, Luna, this is Uncle Bud.

- Hi. - Hi, Uncle Bud.

Are we having them for dinner.

They looks pretty tasty, don't they?

Well we've got plenty of soy burgers.

- Can you say? - Well, we--

We love dinner on any planet.

That's my kind of woman, an intergalactic gidget.

We have to go back. Don't you remember?

Well, look, while we're here, this could make

a great social studies project. - Or biology.

Well, I guess until we find the fuel

we really have no choice.

We'd love to.

All right. All right.

Got your brewskis here.

Got your brewskiS.

Thanks.

OK.

All right.

And last but not least.

Now ladies, gentlemen, toast to new friends.

To new friends.

To new friends.

What do you call this drink?

It's beer.

I'd like some more.

Oh, my God.

Ouch.

Oh, Jesus. Ow.

Ah.

Must be radiation poisoning.

Hang on, partner.

I got something just for you.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

[HUMMING]

Uncle Bud's sunburn cure, suntan lotion,

and, uh, barbecue sauce.

Here you better do that.

You're a little more cuter than I am.

DAVE: That stuff really works.

Yeah, it does.

All right, ladies.

I have for you dessert.

Uncle Bud's soy milk shake with honey.

Tell me what you think.

Oh, wow.

This stuff's strong.

I feel warm all over.

Yeah, I'm getting a contact buzz, man.

It's like a chain reaction.

I'm getting warm because she's getting warm.

Luna.

Oh, yeah.

XENA: Luna, I-- I didn't know you were like this.

I'm not.

Yeah, well, I'm going to take a little walk.

I'm not normally like this either.

DAVE: You want to go for a walk?

Sure.

And I'm going to show you the [INAUDIBLE]..

I'm normally not like this.

This is a great experience.

I must collect data.

God, I love California.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

What the hell are you trying to do to me?

I mean, after all that we used to mean to each other.

Bud, you got to grow up someday.

And what is that?

Making more money?

Buying more things, huh?

Is that your idea of growing up?

Bud, you're just being difficult.

I'm being difficult?

You know, I have been making headway in therapy.

And, yeah, I realize that I am angry at you

for not marrying me.

What?

That's ten years ago?

You should have been over that by now.

Your place is going to be condemned by the state

anyway if you don't make those improvements.

I think you're just being passive aggressive.

I mean, don't you still have any feelings for me?

Bye, Sally.

Bud, you know, I could help you.

I could help you market your sunburn suntan lotion.

I could change your life.

You wouldn't be living like this.

Sally, I like living like this.

I like my place the way it is.

And I'd like to keep it like that until I want to change it.

OK?

Bud? Bud?

Hassler.

Hyman.

Hi, babes.

What's up?

The names Sally.

Not babes.

Sorry.

Well, Bud was just here.

Hey, that's what you wanted, right?

Yes, but he's not cooperating.

You pay me to be a hatchet man.

I'm a lawyer, remember?

I'm scum.

It's what's expected of me.

Hey, did you ever think that maybe as a girlfriend

or just plain not interested?

No, I didn't consider that.

Why don't you try some flowers?

A romantic dinner?

Maybe a nice bottle of wine?

I'm sure that'd be more of an aphrodisiac

than condemning the guy's house.

Maybe you're right.

Yeah, well, I won't bill you for the reality check.

Thanks.

So where were we?

We were going to get through your briefs?

Oh, yeah.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

[SCREAMING]

DAVE: It's so clear out.

Feels like I could just reach out

and grab one of those stars.

Yeah.

This part of the galaxy has such a beautiful sky.

Yeah.

You know, I really want to kiss you.

But I'm afraid if I do--

I want you to.

There's just some things you don't know about me yet.

Some things I don't know about you.

You know?

Like you've got a terminal disease?

Or a boyfriend with a glandular problem

that could crush my head like a grape?

You're from another planet?

You're really a man?

Now what could be so bad?

You're the sweetest boy I've ever met, Dave.

Well, gosh, ma'am.

It weren't nothing.

Just some things I can't tell you right now.

Just hold me.

I feel like I can trust you.

I don't really have anywhere else to turn.

You're still on taking a chance.

Hey, boy scouts honor.

What could be so terrible?

I'm not from Sweden.

I'm from the planet Vasquez.

You know that UFO you said you saw?

Yeah.

That was me, Sola, and Luna crash landing.

See, we took my parent's ship out.

What?

I live a few light years away from here.

You're telling me you're an alien?

You said you believed in UFO's.

Yeah, but aliens are green and have big heads, and bad breath,

and ten eyes.

I knew you wouldn't believe me.

No, it's-- it's just that people make fun of me when

I tell them I believe in UFO's.

I guess I'm going to have to prove it to you.

Oh, my gosh.

Holy shit.

You're a space babe.

Can I go inside?

Sure.

You got to be careful.

It's my father's pride and joy here.

This is really cool.

What-- what's this do?

No, no, no, no.

That's a gamma death ray.

We use that to destroy asteroids in the galaxy.

Let's see.

We've got the windshield wipers over here.

Air conditioning, heater.

Hi-Fi stereo. Ooh.

Horn right here.

Basic cup holder.

A real UFO.

Sure is.

Promise to keep this a secret.

Who am I going to tell?

Geraldo?

I mean, what happened?

How did you get here?

Well, my parents went on vacation.

Sola convinced me to come here.

We ran out of fuel, and here we are.

That's a tough break.

Can I help?

Well, we need a special fuel to get back.

Hey, maybe that Dr. Veg guy can help.

Hey.

Good morning, Dave.

Can I fix some breakfast for you and your friend?

I was wondering--

I mean, I heard you used to be an astro-scientist and all.

And I was just wondering if maybe with all your skills

and expertise you could replicate this special fuel

additive from the van.

Maybe five gallons?

I could probably whip up a batch.

But to tell you the truth, I'm not in that line of business

anymore.

Unless it's for peaceful purposes.

You know, ever since they used the space

shuttle for military missions, well, I bailed.

Where did you find this chick? - Well--

I don't want to know about it.

If the CIA finds out it's big trouble.

Thanks for the advice.

Hey, no problem.

I'm a sucker for a pretty face.

No matter where she's from.

- Thanks, doc. - See you later.

All right.

Surf's up, guys.

Last one in is a geek.

Let's go.

[CHEERING]

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Where did you get that swimsuit?

It's so cool.

Oh, thanks. I made it myself.

Wow.

Bikini contest.

First place winner, $30,000. - Woe.

Sponsored by Sun Bun tanning lotion.

Wow.

Xena you should enter.

You think?

Oh, yeah.

Bud, listen, I'm sorry, man.

Sally started the ball rolling, and it rolled over you.

Look, It's not your fault. I mean, it's my fault.

I should have had some of these things taken care of, I guess.

Now the only way to fix is is to do the work.

Listen, if I could show the city that you have money in the bank

to fix, uh, everything.

Everything?

Everything.

No problem.

I'll let you stay until Monday, OK?

Yeah. Yeah.

Thanks.

We'll, uh-- we'll think of something, OK?

I'm sure you will.

Uh, kids, look, I got to run an errand.

I'll be back.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

What's wrong?

Well, looks like this time I'm really going to lose the place.

Unless I can fix it up.

How much is that going to cost?

About $30,000.

Xena, why don't you enter the contest?

If we win we can give the money to bud.

That's a great idea.

Beta money means nothing to us.

XENA: I know. - Sure.

We'll all model.

- Not me. - Wait a minute.

Come on, kids.

You don't have to do this for me.

I mean, what the heck?

Maybe Sally's right.

Maybe I need to grow up, to get a job.

DAVE: Don't do that, Uncle Bud.

If you like your life the way it is now, don't change.

We'll help you.

How much of a chance do you think we have of winning?

You told me that nothing is worth worrying about,

and keep a positive attitude.

Yeah, You got to see the donut.

Not just the whole.

Right.

Well then that settles it.

Let's get started right away.

Mr. Bun, come on in.

Are you ready for the bikini preview?

Well, I'm not sure what good it will do, but go ahead.

We're going to judge every design on its own merit.

Mr. Bun, my attorney says that if I win this could be

very lucrative for both of us.

Tell me, Sally, you've lived out here for a while.

Are you friendly with this guy, the big cahones?

I don't even know if he's alive.

Um, mhm.

Yes, sure, Bud.

I'd like to take some surfing lessons from him.

I'm a big fan of his.

Sure.

So are we ready? Girls.

Yeah, well, Mr. Bun, I'm hoping that we do a lot of business

together.

Oh, my God.

And I know you're one of the judges,

and I don't want to temp you or anything.

Miss Mallow, this is totally inappropriate.

I-- I'm sorry--

I didn't.

I'm sorry.

I'll pretend this didn't happen.

Men, come on.

God, I hope I didn't fuck that up.

Your uncle is the Big Kahunas?

David, why didn't you tell me this?

I didn't know.

No wonder he has all those trophies and surf

stuff at his house.

Hey, Xena.

Uh, look, I just wanted to thank you for all the help

that you're trying to give me.

Oh, anything for you, Uncle Bud.

Who is that girl?

Bu, you betrayed me.

You didn't tell me you had another girlfriend.

Oh, Doc.

Are you OK?

Man, you have one tough icicle up there.

But I think I got it.

All I have to do is strain it through some heavy water

and pop it in the oven until tomorrow.

And I think that should be it. - All right.

Thanks, doc.

You're a champ. - Yeah.

Yeah.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

He's got a whole harem in there.

He could have at least told me.

Those are really nice suits.

They're going to win the contest.

Damn it.

What's wrong?

Hi.

Oh, I'm trying to put together these suits

and I don't have all the stuff I need.

It's driving me crazy.

For sewing?

Well, I've got that stuff at my house.

I've even got a sewing machine.

You do?

SALLY: Who are you?

XENA: Xena crock.

What do you want with me?

Your bathing suit designs.

And I'm not going to let you have Bud.

Bud?

I don't want Bud.

Dave's my boyfriend.

You young chicks are all alike.

Going after a man that's old enough to be your father.

What's going on here?

A way to get Bud off the beach.

This is his girlfriend.

Sally, are you disturbed?

You've kidnapped her.

I'm not a criminal defense lawyer.

Don't worry.

I know how much you love Bud, but this

is not the way to win him back.

I'm not his girlfriend.

I'm only trying to help him out right.

This is ridiculous.

I don't want to be a part of it.

First you still her designs, and now this.

I'm out of here.

- Wait. - Girls.

Everyone was right.

Betonians are [INAUDIBLE] and dangerous.

Sir, I'm looking for this chick, man.

She's got blond hair, and she's sort of spacey, you know?

She's totally hot.

Have you seen her?

Take a look around, man.

You just described half the girls on this beach.

Xena?

Xena?

Hey, Xena?

Hey.

Wow.

Excuse me.

Xena?

Xena?

[SCREAMING]

Pervert.

Jerk.

You pervert.

- Hey, Doc. - Hey.

Have you seen Xena?

That girl I've been hanging out with.

Yeah, she took off with Sally.

You know, I got to tell you, that Sally

is always up to no good.

I'd watch out for her.

Maybe she's off thinking.

I mean, she just broke up with her boyfriend

and now she likes Dave.

That could be.

Her last boyfriend was such a jerk.

You know, this looks just a little bit loose.

Ouch. Not so tight.

Oh, you're hurting my arm. Ouch.

She's at Sally's mansion.

So what?

Get her back here, man.

There's work to do.

It's not so simple.

I should have listened to my parents.

To money.

To power.

- To fashion. - To lust.

To therapy.

I'm sorry I have to do this.

I hope you don't mind.

I'll let you go after the contest.

Sleep well.

Dude, this-- this Sally chick really gives me the creeps.

I mean, I'm starting to get, like, a really bad vibe.

I think I'm going to stay here and keep watch.

OK. Good idea.

Wish us luck.

Hey, guys, good luck.

[KNOCKING ON WINDOW]

Dave.

[DOORKNOB JIGGLING]

- Are you OK? - Yeah.

She stole my bathing suits.

She's going to try to claim credit for them tomorrow.

OK, let's get them.

She's locked them in the closet.

She's got the keys upstairs with her.

All right. I'll be back.

[SNORING]

Bud.

Bud, I love you.

I didn't mean to hurt you.

Take me, Bud.

Oh, Bud, you're so hot.

You're so stinking hot.

Oh, take me, you big kahunas.

DAVE: Here's the keys.

Dude, this is where Sally keeps all of her suits.

No, man, we'll win fair and square.

Why?

Come on, Jerry.

All right.

Guys, hold on a minute.

Let me fix Sally's suits for her.

What are you going to do?

You'll see at the contest.

We saved her.

And I got the suits.

- Oh, that's great. - Oh, great.

Dave?

You saved me.

And I got the fuel for your ship.

What's wrong?

Isn't that what I was supposed to do?

Yeah, of course.

That means I have to go back.

I have to leave you.

And once I get there I'll be grounded

for the rest of my life.

Probably never get to leave Vasquez ever again.

Hey, we'll figure out a way.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Come on. Everyone come over here.

Hey, we're going to win this, right?

That's right.

Let's do this.

[CHEERING]

ANNOUNCER: Welcome, I'd like to thank

you all for coming out to the first annual Sun

Bun bikini open.

First prize is $30,000.

So let the contest begin.

[MUSIC PLAYING AND CHEERING]

WOMAN: Oh, wow.

Did you see [INAUDIBLE]. Wow.

These are awesome.

Like, I've never seen anything like it.

[CHEERING]

ALL: Boo!

ANNOUNCER: The judges have changed their minds.

Sally Mallow's bikinis did not hold up.

One of the contest rules, the bikini's

have to hold everything up.

So Xena [INAUDIBLE] is the winner.

She wins $30,000. Yeah.

Thank you, everybody.

Thank you so much.

I especially like to thank Dave, and Uncle Bud,

and Ziggy, and Jerry, and Sola And Luna,

my two best friends in the whole world,

and my parents for making me possible,

all the little people on the planet of [INAUDIBLE]..

Thank you, everybody.

Thank you so much.

[CHEERING]

What happened?

I put this chemical on their bikinis

that turned into an acid when they [INAUDIBLE]..

[MUSIC PLAYING]

Om.

Uncle Bud!

We won.

Now you can fix your place up.

You won!

Whoa!

Yeah, this is-- this is what I meditated for.

This-- this is gnarly.

Oh, but now I feel sorry for Sally.

You know, she and I, well, we used to go out together.

You should have told me.

We were going to get married, but I was young.

I didn't want to be tied down.

Now I'm kind of having second thoughts.

You still care about her?

Yeah.

I mean, yeah, I guess.

Well, I know she cares about you.

She doesn't want to change you or anything.

Nothing like that.

She loves you just the way you are.

It's kind of hard living out on your own on the edge

all the time.

I think you should talk to her.

Yeah, don't you-- don't you get tired living out

here on the beach by yourself?

Well, sure.

Every year the kids get younger and younger,

and I get older and older.

I feel like Rip Van Winkle.

I wake up 20 years later and everything's changed.

There's nothing wrong with getting older.

Man, Why not?

I'll give it a chance.

What do I got to lose?

Hey, thanks.

Thank you.

OK.

Hey, wish me luck, kids, OK?

Hi.

Hi.

Mind if I join you?

If you want.

Now that I've made a total fool of myself.

I'm, uh--

I'm sorry that you thought I was going out with Xena.

She is just a little bit too young for me.

Sorry.

- The things we do for love. - Really.

So, you know, I--

I've been thinking.

Maybe we ought to get back together again.

You really think we should?

Well, yeah. Sure.

I mean, what the heck.

We were good together.

Yeah, you're right.

Yeah.

All right.

Hi.

Are you going to introduce me?

Oh, sure.

This is a Bud, big khans, Elrick.

And this is Mr. Sun Bun.

Been a fan of yours for years.

I just thought I'd come over and say hi.

Oh, it's nice to meet you.

Oh, Mr. Bun, Bud here has this sunburn relief

formula that's incredible.

I mean, it's going to revolutionize

sunburn relief ointments.

I think you should market it.

Could we name it after you?

Big Kahunas sunburn relief ointment?

I'd be a brand name?

You'd be a consultant and you'd make appearances.

This will take the tanning world by storm.

I'm stunned.

I don't know what to say.

Tell me that you're lawyer and my lawyer will be in touch.

You bet.

Oh, we'll see you later, boss.

That'd be great.

Bud, I am so proud of you.

Hey, Davy, look, Sally and I, we--

we decided to tried it again.

- Really? - Yeah.

We came to a new understanding.

Thanks to you and Xena.

Well, that's great, Uncle Bud.

Congratulations.

So, anyway, look--

we're going up to Sally's tonight.

So you kids be careful and we'll see you in the morning, huh?

Have fun.

OK.

[INAUDIBLE]

Hang loose.

You know, that is seriously cool.

People at that age willing to give it another shot.

I know, man.

I don't know how my parents do it.

XENA: Yeah. Well, mine our-- oh shit.

What?

My parents.

GORK: Yanna, did you have to buy every souvenir

in the gift shop?

We can barely move around in here.

YANNA: Why is it every young man I marry ends up being so cheap.

GORK: You know, you were right.

This trip was exactly what I needed to clear my head

and to recharge my space probe.

Recharge it you did, didn't you?

You know, but I'm still a little worried about not

being able to reach Xena.

Yanna you worry too much.

She probably spent the weekend at Sola's or Luna's.

Besides, she's a big [INAUDIBLE]..

What kind of trouble could she have possibly gotten into?

Thanks, Dr. Veg.

Yeah, thanks.

Good luck.

Wherever you're going.

It's a spaceship.

Told you.

Whoa, dude.

You mean, you're a beach babe from beyond?

Bet your ass, dude.

Oh, wow.

Luna, I mean, what do I say?

Don't say anything. We'll be back.

This has been great.

I'm so glad I met you.

I have to go.

I can't ask for your phone number or your address?

I'll find you. Don't worry.

[MUSIC PLAYING]