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00:00:05,205 --> 00:00:07,374
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COMEDY CENTRAL
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00:00:08,241 --> 00:00:09,542
♪ I'M GOING DOWN
TO SOUTH PARK ♪
3
00:00:09,542 --> 00:00:11,277
♪ GONNA HAVE
MYSELF A TIME ♪
4
00:00:11,711 --> 00:00:13,013
♪ FRIENDLY FACES
EVERYWHERE ♪
5
00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:14,748
♪ HUMBLE FOLKS
WITHOUT TEMPTATION ♪
6
00:00:14,748 --> 00:00:16,049
♪ GOING DOWN
TO SOUTH PARK ♪
7
00:00:16,049 --> 00:00:17,784
♪ GONNA LEAVE MY
WOES BEHIND ♪
8
00:00:18,218 --> 00:00:19,519
♪ AMPLE PARKING
DAY OR NIGHT ♪
9
00:00:19,519 --> 00:00:21,254
♪ PEOPLE SPOUTING
"HOWDY NEIGHBOR" ♪
10
00:00:21,254 --> 00:00:22,555
♪ HEADIN' ON UP
TO SOUTH PARK ♪
11
00:00:22,555 --> 00:00:24,724
♪ GONNA SEE
IF I CAN'T UNWIND ♪
12
00:00:24,724 --> 00:00:27,761
♪ ( muffled mumble
muffled mumble ) ♪
13
00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:29,496
♪ SO COME ON DOWN
TO SOUTH PARK ♪
14
00:00:29,496 --> 00:00:31,231
♪ AND MEET SOME
FRIENDS OF MINE ♪♪
15
00:00:34,067 --> 00:00:34,934
♪ SCHOOL DAYS
SCHOOL DAYS ♪
16
00:00:35,368 --> 00:00:36,236
♪ TEACHER'S
GOLDEN RULE DAYS ♪
17
00:00:36,236 --> 00:00:37,537
AW, DAMMIT !
WHAT ?
18
00:00:37,971 --> 00:00:39,706
MY GOD DAMN BROTHER IS TRYING
TO FOLLOW ME TO SCHOOL AGAIN !
19
00:00:39,706 --> 00:00:41,007
SUCK MY BALLS.
20
00:00:41,441 --> 00:00:43,176
NO, IKE, YOU CAN'T COME
TO SCHOOL WITH ME !
21
00:00:43,176 --> 00:00:44,477
YEAH, GO HOME,
YOU LITTLE DILDO !
22
00:00:44,477 --> 00:00:46,646
DUDE, FOR THE LAST TIME,
DON'T CALL MY BROTHER A DILDO !
23
00:00:46,646 --> 00:00:49,249
ALRIGHT, GO HOME YOU LITTLE
SEMEN-PUKING, ASSHOLE DICKHEAD.
24
00:00:49,682 --> 00:00:50,550
OW !
25
00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:52,285
DUDE, SWEET !
26
00:00:52,285 --> 00:00:53,586
YEAH, CHECK IT OUT.
27
00:00:53,586 --> 00:00:55,321
READY, IKE ?
KICK THE BABY !
28
00:00:55,321 --> 00:00:57,924
DON'T KICK
THE GOD DAMN BABY.
29
00:00:57,924 --> 00:00:59,659
WAH-- AH !
30
00:01:00,093 --> 00:01:00,960
WOAH, CARTMAN,
31
00:01:01,394 --> 00:01:02,695
LOOKS LIKE YOU DIDN'T
GET MUCH SLEEP LAST NIGHT.
32
00:01:03,129 --> 00:01:03,997
THAT'S BECAUSE
I WAS HAVING THESE
33
00:01:03,997 --> 00:01:05,732
BOGUS NIGHTMARES
ALL NIGHT LONG.
34
00:01:05,732 --> 00:01:07,033
REALLY ?
WHAT ABOUT ?
35
00:01:07,033 --> 00:01:09,636
WELL, I DREAMT THAT I WAS
LYING IN MY BED, IN THE DARK...
36
00:01:09,636 --> 00:01:13,106
WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THIS BRIGHT
BLUE LIGHT FILLED THE ROOM.
37
00:01:13,106 --> 00:01:15,708
AND SLOWLY, MY BEDROOM DOOR
BEGAN TO OPEN.
38
00:01:15,708 --> 00:01:17,010
AND THEN THE NEXT THING
I REMEMBER
39
00:01:17,444 --> 00:01:18,745
I WAS BEING DRUG
THROUGH A HALLWAY !
40
00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:20,046
WEEEE !
41
00:01:20,046 --> 00:01:22,215
THEN THESE SCARY ALIENS
WANTED TO OPERATE ON ME !
42
00:01:22,649 --> 00:01:25,251
THEY HAD BIG HEADS
AND BIG BLACK EYES--
43
00:01:25,251 --> 00:01:26,553
DUDE, VISITORS !
TOTALLY !
44
00:01:26,553 --> 00:01:27,854
WHAT ?
45
00:01:27,854 --> 00:01:29,155
THAT WASN'T A DREAM, CARTMAN,
THOSE WERE VISITORS !
46
00:01:29,155 --> 00:01:30,457
NO, IT WAS JUST A DREAM,
MY MOM SAID SO.
47
00:01:30,890 --> 00:01:32,192
VISITORS ARE REAL !
THEY--
48
00:01:32,192 --> 00:01:35,228
WAIT A MINUTE, THIS HAS
ALL HAPPENED BEFORE.
49
00:01:35,228 --> 00:01:36,963
YEAH. THIS DOES SEEM
REALLY FAMILIAR.
50
00:01:37,397 --> 00:01:39,132
WHAT THEFUNK AND WAGNALLS
ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ?
51
00:01:39,132 --> 00:01:41,734
CARTMAN, DON'T YOU REMEMBER THE
LAST TIME YOU HAD THIS DREAM ?
52
00:01:41,734 --> 00:01:43,903
SHUT UP YOU GUYS, YOU'RE JUST
TRYING TO SCARE ME.
53
00:01:43,903 --> 00:01:45,638
NO, DUDE,
THIS HAPPENED BEFORE !
54
00:01:45,638 --> 00:01:46,940
ALIENS PUT SOME DEVICE IN YOU,
55
00:01:46,940 --> 00:01:48,675
AND THEN WE TIED YOU TO A TREE
AND YOU WENT UP ON THEIR SHIP.
56
00:01:48,675 --> 00:01:49,542
YOU DON'T REMEMBER THAT ?
57
00:01:49,542 --> 00:01:50,844
NO, I DON'T
REMEMBER THAT !
58
00:01:51,277 --> 00:01:52,145
YOU DON'T ?
59
00:01:52,145 --> 00:01:53,446
NO, BECAUSE THE ALIENS
ERASED MY MEMORY !
60
00:01:53,880 --> 00:01:55,615
I REMEMBER THIS WHOLE THING.
61
00:01:55,615 --> 00:01:57,350
IKE TRIED TO FOLLOW YOU
TO SCHOOL, YOU KICKED HIM,
62
00:01:57,350 --> 00:01:59,085
THEN CARTMAN TOLD US
ABOUT HIS ALIEN DREAM.
63
00:01:59,519 --> 00:02:01,688
YEAH, AND THEN CHEF
PULLED UP IN HIS CAR.
64
00:02:03,423 --> 00:02:04,290
HELLO THERE, CHILDREN !
65
00:02:04,724 --> 00:02:07,327
AND THEN YOU SAID--
66
00:02:07,327 --> 00:02:09,496
WHAT'S GONNA BE FOR
LUNCH TODAY, CHEF ?
67
00:02:09,496 --> 00:02:12,098
WELL, TODAY IT'S SALISBURY STEAK
WITH HOT BUTTERED NOODLES
68
00:02:12,098 --> 00:02:13,399
( all )
AND A CHOICE OF
GREEN BEAN SALAD
69
00:02:13,399 --> 00:02:15,135
OR VEGETABLE MEDLEY.
70
00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:16,002
WEIRD.
71
00:02:16,002 --> 00:02:17,303
SAY, DID ANY OF YOU
CHILDREN--
72
00:02:17,303 --> 00:02:18,605
SEE THE ALIEN SPACESHIP
LAST NIGHT ?
73
00:02:19,038 --> 00:02:20,340
WHAT THE-- ?
74
00:02:20,340 --> 00:02:22,509
CHEF, WE'RE
IN A REPEAT !
75
00:02:22,509 --> 00:02:23,376
A REPEAT ?
76
00:02:23,376 --> 00:02:25,111
CARTMAN WAS VISITED BY
ALIENS AGAIN LAST NIGHT.
77
00:02:25,111 --> 00:02:27,714
AND NOW IT'S LIKE WE'RE LIVING
A REPEAT OF A PREVIOUS DAY.
78
00:02:27,714 --> 00:02:29,015
OH, DUDE, I HATE REPEATS.
79
00:02:29,449 --> 00:02:31,618
I'VE BEEN FEELING DEJA VU
ALL MORNING, CHILDREN.
80
00:02:31,618 --> 00:02:33,786
I KNEW SOMETHING STRANGE
WAS GOING ON.
81
00:02:33,786 --> 00:02:35,522
IT ALL STARTED WHEN CARTMAN
GOT AN ANAL PROBE.
82
00:02:35,522 --> 00:02:38,992
WE HAVE TO GET ERIC TO A
PROCTOLOGIST RIGHT AWAY.
83
00:02:41,594 --> 00:02:43,329
WHAT IS A
PROC-TOLOGIST, CHEF ?
84
00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:45,932
HE'S A DOCTOR THAT SPECIALIZES
IN YOUR ASSHOLE, CHILDREN.
85
00:02:46,366 --> 00:02:47,667
YOU MEAN AT SOME POINT
IN THIS DOCTOR'S LIFE
86
00:02:47,667 --> 00:02:49,402
HE DECIDED HE WANTED TO
WORK ON PEOPLE'S BUTTHOLES ?
87
00:02:49,836 --> 00:02:50,703
THAT'S RIGHT.
88
00:02:50,703 --> 00:02:52,005
WHAT A DICK.
89
00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:53,306
HELLO, EVERYONE.
90
00:02:53,306 --> 00:02:54,607
HELLO, DOCTOR.
91
00:02:54,607 --> 00:02:55,909
THANKS FOR SEEING ERIC
ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE.
92
00:02:55,909 --> 00:02:57,210
WHAT SEEMS TO BE
THE PROBLEM ?
93
00:02:57,210 --> 00:02:58,511
WE JUST WANT YOU
TO TAKE A LOOK
94
00:02:58,511 --> 00:03:00,246
AND TELL US IF YOU SEE
ANYTHING ABNORMAL.
95
00:03:00,246 --> 00:03:01,548
OTHER THAN ITS
MONSTROUS SIZE.
96
00:03:01,981 --> 00:03:04,584
SHUT UP ! SHUT YOUR
GOD DAMN MOUTH !!
97
00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:06,753
ALRIGHT, LET'S SEE HERE...
98
00:03:06,753 --> 00:03:08,488
OH MY GOD !
99
00:03:08,488 --> 00:03:09,789
WHAT ?
100
00:03:09,789 --> 00:03:11,524
WHY THERE'S A HUGE CRACK GOING
RIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE !
101
00:03:11,524 --> 00:03:14,561
HA, HA, VERY FUNNY.
102
00:03:14,561 --> 00:03:16,729
LIKE WE HAVEN'T HEARD
THAT ONE A ZILLION TIMES.
103
00:03:16,729 --> 00:03:18,898
ALRIGHT,
LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
104
00:03:19,332 --> 00:03:20,633
HEY !
105
00:03:20,633 --> 00:03:22,368
JUST WHAT THE HELL DO YOU
THINK YOU'RE DOING ?
106
00:03:22,368 --> 00:03:24,971
ERIC, THE DOCTOR HAS TO FEEL
INSIDE YOUR RECTUM.
107
00:03:24,971 --> 00:03:25,838
AND AFTERWARDS,
108
00:03:25,838 --> 00:03:27,574
HE'LL PROBABLY HAVE TO
BURN HIS HAND AND BURY IT.
109
00:03:27,574 --> 00:03:29,309
KYLE, I SWEAR IF I DIDN'T
HAVE A GUY'S HAND UP
MY ASS RIGHT NOW,
110
00:03:29,309 --> 00:03:31,477
I'D LEAP ACROSS THE ROOM
AND KICK YOU IN THE NUTS.
111
00:03:31,477 --> 00:03:34,948
EGH, EH-- OOH.
112
00:03:34,948 --> 00:03:36,683
THE PROSTATE
SEEMS TO BE NORMAL...
113
00:03:37,116 --> 00:03:38,418
NO SWELLING OF
THE HERMODAL GLAND...
114
00:03:38,851 --> 00:03:40,587
WAIT, WHAT'S THIS ?
115
00:03:40,587 --> 00:03:41,888
AAAGH !
116
00:03:45,358 --> 00:03:46,226
ARE YOU OKAY ?
117
00:03:46,659 --> 00:03:47,527
DUDE...
118
00:03:47,961 --> 00:03:50,129
YOU KNOW THAT FEELING
WHEN YOU TAKE A HUGE DUMP ?
119
00:03:50,129 --> 00:03:50,997
AWESOME.
120
00:03:50,997 --> 00:03:52,298
WELL, DOCTOR ?
121
00:03:52,298 --> 00:03:54,467
I'VE NEVER QUITE
SEEN THIS BEFORE.
122
00:03:54,467 --> 00:03:57,070
PERHAPS HE JUST NEEDS
SOME HEMORRHOID CREAM.
123
00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:59,672
AAAGH !
124
00:03:59,672 --> 00:04:00,974
YOU ALRIGHT ?
125
00:04:00,974 --> 00:04:02,709
YOU KNOW THAT FEELING WHEN
THE HUGE DUMP YOU JUST TOOK
126
00:04:03,142 --> 00:04:04,444
SHOOTS BACK UP
INSIDE YOUR ASS ?
127
00:04:04,444 --> 00:04:05,745
NO, I'M NOT ALRIGHT !!
128
00:04:05,745 --> 00:04:07,914
I'VE NEVER SEEN
A HEMORRHOID
REACT THIS WAY.
129
00:04:07,914 --> 00:04:10,950
THAT WASN'T NO HEMORRHOID,
IT WAS A ALIEN HOOP-A-JOO !
130
00:04:10,950 --> 00:04:13,987
COME ON, CHILDREN, WE'VE GOT TO
GET ERIC TO SOME REAL HELP !
131
00:04:13,987 --> 00:04:15,288
WHERE TO NOW, CHEF ?
132
00:04:15,288 --> 00:04:16,155
THAT THING INSIDE
ERIC'S ASSHOLE
133
00:04:16,589 --> 00:04:17,890
LOOKED LIKE SOME KIND OF
ALIEN SATELLITE DISH.
134
00:04:18,324 --> 00:04:21,361
WE NEED TO SEE MY FRIEND DOWN
AT THE SPACE CENTER, NOW !
135
00:04:30,903 --> 00:04:32,205
AND YOU'RE THE ONLY PERSON
I COULD THINK OF
136
00:04:32,205 --> 00:04:33,940
WHO MIGHT BE ABLE
TO HELP US, JEFF.
137
00:04:33,940 --> 00:04:35,675
HOW DO WE, UH,
MAKE IT COME OUT ?
138
00:04:36,109 --> 00:04:37,844
SOMEONE JUST HAS TO ACTIVATE IT
LIKE THE PROCTOLOGIST DID.
139
00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:39,145
OH, NO, NO, NO, NO !
140
00:04:39,145 --> 00:04:41,748
NOBODY IS PUTTING THEIR
FINGER IN MY ASS AGAIN !
141
00:04:42,181 --> 00:04:43,483
UNLESS IT'S KYLE.
142
00:04:43,483 --> 00:04:45,218
WHAT ?
NO WAY !
143
00:04:45,218 --> 00:04:46,085
YOU DO IT, KENNY.
144
00:04:46,085 --> 00:04:47,387
NOPE, IT HAS TO
BE KYLE.
145
00:04:47,820 --> 00:04:48,688
GO ON.
146
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:49,989
I'M NOT PUTTING MY FINGER
UP CARTMAN'S BUTT !
147
00:04:49,989 --> 00:04:53,026
KYLE, THE FATE OF THE WORLD
MAY BE AT STAKE.
148
00:04:53,026 --> 00:04:55,628
COME, KYLE,
DO HURRY.
149
00:04:59,532 --> 00:05:01,267
GO AHEAD,
IT WON'T BITE.
150
00:05:01,267 --> 00:05:02,568
( farts )
151
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:05,171
GOD DAMN IT, CARTMAN !
152
00:05:05,605 --> 00:05:08,207
I COULDN'T RESIST,
I'M SORRY.
153
00:05:08,207 --> 00:05:09,075
( farts )
154
00:05:09,509 --> 00:05:11,244
STOP IT, CARTMAN !
155
00:05:11,244 --> 00:05:12,979
OKAY, OKAY.
156
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:14,280
( farts )
157
00:05:14,280 --> 00:05:16,449
GOD DAMMIT !
158
00:05:16,449 --> 00:05:19,052
MAN, THAT WAS GREAT.
159
00:05:19,485 --> 00:05:21,654
OKAY, GO AHEAD,
I'M ALL OUT OF FARTS NOW.
160
00:05:21,654 --> 00:05:22,955
( farts )
161
00:05:23,389 --> 00:05:24,691
DURRRR !
162
00:05:25,124 --> 00:05:28,594
OKAY, OKAY,
IT'S NOT FUNNY ANYMORE.
163
00:05:28,594 --> 00:05:29,896
( farts )
164
00:05:29,896 --> 00:05:32,065
OH, YES IT IS !
165
00:05:32,065 --> 00:05:33,366
ERIC, THAT'S ENOUGH !
166
00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:35,968
OKAY, OKAY.
167
00:05:36,402 --> 00:05:37,270
( farts )
168
00:05:37,270 --> 00:05:39,005
OH, DOUBLE PSYCHE !
169
00:05:39,439 --> 00:05:40,740
THAT'S IT !
170
00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:42,475
I DON'T CARE ABOUT
THE FATE OF THE WORLD.
171
00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:43,343
SCREW IT !
172
00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:44,644
OH, NICE GOING,
CARTMAN !
173
00:05:44,644 --> 00:05:45,511
ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT,
I'M SORRY.
174
00:05:45,945 --> 00:05:46,813
GO AHEAD, KYLE.
175
00:05:46,813 --> 00:05:47,680
NO !
176
00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:48,548
NO, GO AHEAD,
I'M DRY.
177
00:05:48,548 --> 00:05:49,415
YOU'RE LYING !
178
00:05:49,849 --> 00:05:51,150
IT STOPPED BEING FUNNY
40 SECONDS AGO, BOYS.
179
00:05:51,150 --> 00:05:52,452
LET'S JUST GET THIS
OVER WITH.
180
00:05:52,885 --> 00:05:54,620
BUT ITWASONE OF THE
BEST TIMES I'VE EVER HAD.
181
00:05:54,620 --> 00:05:56,356
CAN I SEE THIS THING,
PLEASE ?
182
00:05:56,356 --> 00:05:58,091
OKAY.
183
00:05:58,091 --> 00:06:00,259
( farts )
184
00:06:00,693 --> 00:06:02,862
OKAY, NOW IT'S
FUNNY AGAIN.
185
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:04,163
THIS IS SO AWESOME !
186
00:06:04,163 --> 00:06:05,465
I DON'T THINK I MADE IT
187
00:06:05,465 --> 00:06:06,332
OUT OF THAT PROCTOLOGIST'S'S
OFFICE, GUYS,
188
00:06:06,332 --> 00:06:07,633
I THINK I DIED
AND WENT TO HEAVEN !
189
00:06:07,633 --> 00:06:08,501
THAT DOES IT !
190
00:06:08,501 --> 00:06:09,369
CHARRRGE !
191
00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:10,670
( fart )
192
00:06:10,670 --> 00:06:11,537
AAGH !
193
00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:17,176
WHAT'S IT DOING ?
194
00:06:17,176 --> 00:06:19,779
IT'S SENDING A TRANSMISSION
OF SOME KIND.
195
00:06:21,514 --> 00:06:23,249
GOT IT.
196
00:06:23,249 --> 00:06:26,719
IT'S JUST SENDING IMAGES OF
CITIES AND PEOPLE AND STUFF.
197
00:06:26,719 --> 00:06:28,454
WHERE IS THE SIGNAL
BEING SENT TO ?
198
00:06:28,454 --> 00:06:31,491
UGH, AGH !
199
00:06:31,924 --> 00:06:35,395
I DON'T WANNA PLAY
ANYMORE, YOU GUYS.
200
00:06:35,395 --> 00:06:37,563
WE WENT THROUGH ALL THAT JUST
FOR SOME GAY VIDEO OF EARTH ?
201
00:06:37,563 --> 00:06:39,732
WE WANTED TO SEE AN ALIEN
PLANET OR SOMETHING !
202
00:06:39,732 --> 00:06:41,901
WHOEVER THEY ARE, IF THEY'RE
RECEIVING MESSAGES
203
00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:44,070
THEY MIGHT BE
SENDING THEM TOO.
204
00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:45,805
WAIT A MINUTE.
C-CANDY BARS !
205
00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,540
CANDY BARS ?
206
00:06:47,540 --> 00:06:50,143
Y'KNOW, CANDY BARS, THEY
USUALLY COME IN A WRAPPER,
207
00:06:50,576 --> 00:06:52,311
JUST LIKE YOU WRAP
A CHRISTMAS PRESENT.
208
00:06:52,745 --> 00:06:54,046
CHRISTMAS HAPPENS
WHEN IT'S COLD.
209
00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:55,782
COLD AS IN ALASKA.
210
00:06:55,782 --> 00:06:58,384
THAT'S POLAR BEARS,
POLAR BEARS...
211
00:06:58,384 --> 00:07:00,119
POLARITY !
212
00:07:00,119 --> 00:07:02,288
I CAN SWITCH THE POLARITY
TO SEE WHAT TRANSMISSIONS
213
00:07:02,288 --> 00:07:05,758
ARE COMING FROM THE LOCATION
THIS ONE IS BEING SENT TO !
214
00:07:09,228 --> 00:07:10,963
WHAT THE HECK ?
215
00:07:16,169 --> 00:07:17,904
THEY'RE COMING IN !
216
00:07:23,543 --> 00:07:24,844
WHAT DO WE DO ?
217
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:26,145
IT'S THAT GUY YOU WANT !
218
00:07:26,145 --> 00:07:27,880
HE'S TRYING TO REVERSE
YOUR POLARITIES !
219
00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:29,182
WHAT ?
220
00:07:29,182 --> 00:07:31,350
RUN !
221
00:07:31,350 --> 00:07:33,519
GET IN THE CAR, CHILDREN,
GET IN THE CAR !
222
00:07:36,989 --> 00:07:38,724
( honking )
223
00:07:38,724 --> 00:07:39,592
WHAT IS THAT ?
224
00:07:39,592 --> 00:07:41,327
CAN YOU SEE ANYTHING,
CHILDREN ?
225
00:07:41,327 --> 00:07:43,930
THE ALIENS
ARE CHASING US !
226
00:07:50,002 --> 00:07:51,737
GOD DAMN ALIENS !
227
00:07:53,906 --> 00:07:55,641
CHEF, END OF THE ROAD !
228
00:07:56,509 --> 00:07:59,111
HOLD ON, CHILDREN !
WE HAVE TO DITCH THEM !
229
00:07:59,545 --> 00:08:00,847
WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAN ?
230
00:08:02,582 --> 00:08:04,750
( "Dukes" narrator )
LOOKS LIKE THEM BOYS ARE
GETTING A LITTLE FRESH AIR.
231
00:08:05,184 --> 00:08:09,088
( country music )
232
00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:14,293
I THINK WE DITCHED 'EM.
233
00:08:14,293 --> 00:08:16,896
I DON'T THINK WE'RE
OUT OF THE WOODS YET.
234
00:08:20,366 --> 00:08:21,234
COOP COOP !
235
00:08:21,234 --> 00:08:22,535
IT'S THE POLICE !
236
00:08:22,535 --> 00:08:24,270
THAT AIN'T NO POLICE !
237
00:08:29,475 --> 00:08:31,644
WHEN DO WE GET TO EAT ?
I'M HUNGRY.
238
00:08:32,078 --> 00:08:33,379
CHEF !
239
00:08:33,379 --> 00:08:35,548
OHH !
240
00:08:35,548 --> 00:08:38,150
( "General Lee" horn )
241
00:08:45,525 --> 00:08:47,260
HA ! GOD DAMN ALIENS !
242
00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:48,561
I BEAT YOU !
243
00:08:48,561 --> 00:08:50,730
WHERE'D YOU LEARN
TO DRIVE, ALIENS ?
244
00:08:50,730 --> 00:08:52,465
CHINESE AUTO SCHOOL ?
245
00:08:52,899 --> 00:08:54,200
CHEF !
CHEF, HELP !
246
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:55,501
YOU'RE LUCKY I DIDN'T
JUST TURN AROUND
247
00:08:55,935 --> 00:08:58,538
AND BEAT YOUR WHITE
SKINNY ALIEN ASSES ANYWAY !
248
00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:01,140
MAYBE NEXT TIME
YOU'LL REMEMBER TO-- HUH ?
249
00:09:03,309 --> 00:09:04,176
AW, CRAP !
250
00:09:04,176 --> 00:09:05,478
CHILDREN !
251
00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:07,647
( all )
CHEFFFF !
252
00:09:07,647 --> 00:09:09,382
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE THE BOYS
ARE IN MORE TROUBLE
253
00:09:09,382 --> 00:09:10,683
THAN A JUNE BUG
IN MOLASSES.
254
00:09:11,117 --> 00:09:12,418
AND IT'S PRETTY THICK
MOLASSES, TOO.
255
00:09:18,024 --> 00:09:19,325
UH...
256
00:09:19,759 --> 00:09:21,494
YOU GUYS,
WAKE UP !
257
00:09:21,928 --> 00:09:24,096
WHAT THE--
WHERE ARE WE ?
258
00:09:24,530 --> 00:09:26,699
WE'RE IN THE
ALIEN SHIP.
259
00:09:26,699 --> 00:09:28,000
AH, AH !
260
00:09:28,434 --> 00:09:29,735
UGH, I'M TRAPPED INSIDE
HELEN HUNT'S ASS !
261
00:09:30,169 --> 00:09:31,037
OH GOD, HELP ME,
YOU GUYS !
262
00:09:31,037 --> 00:09:32,338
IT'S NOT
HELEN HUNT'S ASS !
263
00:09:32,338 --> 00:09:33,639
IT'S AN ALIEN SPACESHIP.
264
00:09:33,639 --> 00:09:37,109
OH, THANK GOD !
OH THANK, THANK YOU LORD.
265
00:09:37,109 --> 00:09:39,278
YOU GUYS, LOOK.
266
00:09:40,580 --> 00:09:41,881
WOW.
WOW.
267
00:09:45,785 --> 00:09:47,520
MY GOD,
DO YOU GUYS REALIZE ?
268
00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:50,122
THIS IS ONLY THE SECOND TIME
WE'VE EVER BEEN IN OUTER SPACE.
269
00:09:50,122 --> 00:09:50,990
YEAH.
270
00:09:51,424 --> 00:09:52,725
AWESOME.
271
00:09:52,725 --> 00:09:54,894
THIS IS LIKE
MY FIFTH TIME.
272
00:09:59,231 --> 00:10:00,099
UH-OH.
273
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:01,400
THIS MUST BE
THE HEAD ALIEN GUY.
274
00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:03,135
OH, NO !
275
00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:05,738
HELLO, BOYS.
276
00:10:06,172 --> 00:10:07,039
DAD ?
277
00:10:07,473 --> 00:10:09,208
NO, NOT REALLY.
278
00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:10,509
I JUST READ YOUR MIND
AND THOUGHT THIS FORM
279
00:10:10,943 --> 00:10:13,112
MIGHT BE MORE
PLEASING TO YOU.
280
00:10:13,112 --> 00:10:14,847
OH DUDE, DON'T DO THAT,
THAT'S GAY.
281
00:10:15,281 --> 00:10:16,148
YEAH, THAT'S LIKE THAT
STUPID MOVIE "CONTACT".
282
00:10:16,582 --> 00:10:17,883
OH GOD, THAT MOVIE
PISSED ME OFF.
283
00:10:17,883 --> 00:10:21,354
VERY WELL, I SHALL
SHOW MY TRUE FORM--
284
00:10:21,354 --> 00:10:22,655
BLARGH, BLARGH,
BLARGH !
285
00:10:22,655 --> 00:10:24,390
OKAY, OKAY, TAKE THE FORM
OF SOMETHING ELSE !
286
00:10:24,390 --> 00:10:26,125
HOW'S THIS ?
287
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:27,860
SANTA !
288
00:10:27,860 --> 00:10:29,161
NO, THAT'S STUPID TOO.
289
00:10:29,161 --> 00:10:30,896
HOW ABOUT THIS ?
290
00:10:30,896 --> 00:10:32,632
( all )
NO.
291
00:10:33,933 --> 00:10:35,234
NO.
292
00:10:36,535 --> 00:10:37,837
OOH, VERY NICE.
293
00:10:37,837 --> 00:10:39,138
NO.
294
00:10:39,138 --> 00:10:40,873
NO.
295
00:10:40,873 --> 00:10:43,042
DY-NO-MITE !
296
00:10:43,042 --> 00:10:44,343
( all )
NO !
297
00:10:46,512 --> 00:10:47,813
JEFF !
298
00:10:47,813 --> 00:10:49,548
THE ALIENS TOOK THE CHILDREN
UP ON THEIR SHIP !
299
00:10:49,548 --> 00:10:50,416
OH, NO !
300
00:10:50,850 --> 00:10:52,151
DID YOU FIND OUT WHAT
THE ALIENS ARE UP TO ?
301
00:10:52,151 --> 00:10:53,452
WHEN I REVERSED THE POLARITIES
I FOUND THIS--
302
00:10:53,452 --> 00:10:57,356
IT'S A MESSAGE THAT
THE ALIENS ARE BROADCASTING
303
00:10:57,356 --> 00:10:58,658
THROUGHOUT THE
ENTIRE UNIVERSE.
304
00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:00,393
BUT I HAVE NO IDEA
WHAT IT SAYS.
305
00:11:00,826 --> 00:11:01,694
THEY TOOK THE CHILDREN, JEFF !
306
00:11:02,128 --> 00:11:03,863
I HAVE TO KNOW WHAT
THOSE ALIENS ARE UP TO !
307
00:11:03,863 --> 00:11:06,465
WAIT A MINUTE--
BUTT SEX.
308
00:11:06,465 --> 00:11:07,767
BUTT SEX ?
309
00:11:07,767 --> 00:11:09,935
BUTT SEX REQUIRES A LOT OF
LUBRICATION, RIGHT ?
310
00:11:09,935 --> 00:11:13,406
LUBRICATION...
LUBRA, CHUPA...
311
00:11:13,406 --> 00:11:16,008
CHUPACABRAS, THE GOAT
KILLER OF MEXICAN FOLKLORE.
312
00:11:16,008 --> 00:11:18,177
FOLKLORE IS STORIES
FROM THE PAST
313
00:11:18,177 --> 00:11:19,912
THAT ARE OFTEN
FICTIONALIZED,
314
00:11:19,912 --> 00:11:22,515
FICTIONALIZED TO HEIGHTEN
DRAMA, DRAMA STUDENT !
315
00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:24,250
STUDENTS AT COLLEGES
USUALLY HAVE BICYCLES.
316
00:11:24,250 --> 00:11:26,852
BI, BI-BINARY !
IT'S BINARY CODE !
317
00:11:27,286 --> 00:11:29,021
WHO'S HAVING BUTT SEX ?
318
00:11:29,021 --> 00:11:32,058
♪ HELLO MY HONEY
HELLO MY BABY ♪
319
00:11:32,058 --> 00:11:34,226
♪ HELLO MY
RAG TIME GAL ♪
320
00:11:34,226 --> 00:11:35,528
NO !
321
00:11:35,961 --> 00:11:39,865
♪ LET ME SEARCH IT
GONNA WORK IT... ♪
322
00:11:39,865 --> 00:11:41,167
NO !
323
00:11:41,167 --> 00:11:43,769
♪ DON'T PISS ON
THE MOON, BABE ♪
324
00:11:43,769 --> 00:11:45,071
NO !
325
00:11:45,071 --> 00:11:48,541
ALRIGHT, EARTHLINGS, WHAT FORM
DO YOU WANT ME TO TAKE ?
326
00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:51,577
HOW ABOUT A TACO--
THAT CRAPS ICE CREAM ?
327
00:11:56,348 --> 00:11:57,650
GUYS ?
328
00:11:57,650 --> 00:11:58,517
I LIKE IT.
329
00:11:58,517 --> 00:12:00,252
ME TOO.
330
00:12:00,252 --> 00:12:02,421
ALRIGHT, THEN WE CAN
GET BACK TO BUSINESS.
331
00:12:02,421 --> 00:12:04,590
FOLLOW ME THIS WAY,
EARTHLINGS.
332
00:12:07,193 --> 00:12:08,928
I WANT TO APOLOGIZE
TO YOU BOYS
333
00:12:08,928 --> 00:12:10,663
FOR ALL THE SPOOKY,
SCARY STUFF.
334
00:12:10,663 --> 00:12:13,265
WE JUST NEEDED TO GET TO THE
MALFUNCTIONING UPLINK RELAY.
335
00:12:13,265 --> 00:12:14,567
YOU MEAN THE THING
IN CARTMAN'S ASS ?
336
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:15,868
THAT'S RIGHT.
337
00:12:15,868 --> 00:12:18,037
SEE, THERE ARE DISHES IN OVER
50,000 EARTHLINGS' RECTUMS,
338
00:12:18,037 --> 00:12:19,772
YOUR FRIEND'S
HAS BEEN MALFUNCTIONING.
339
00:12:19,772 --> 00:12:21,073
WHY DO YOU PUT THEM
INTO PEOPLE'S ASSES ?
340
00:12:21,507 --> 00:12:23,242
ARE YOU PLANNING SOME
KIND OF ALIEN TAKE OVER ?
341
00:12:23,242 --> 00:12:24,543
OH, HEAVEN'S NO !
342
00:12:24,543 --> 00:12:25,845
WE'RE A PRODUCTION COMPANY.
343
00:12:25,845 --> 00:12:27,580
WE MAKE INTERGALACTIC
TELEVISION PROGRAMS
344
00:12:28,013 --> 00:12:29,749
THAT THE WHOLE
UNIVERSE WATCHES.
345
00:12:29,749 --> 00:12:31,917
TELEVISION ?
346
00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:34,520
WE AT NERZOD PRODUCTIONS
STARTED 20 BILLION YEARS AGO
347
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:35,821
WITH ONE PHILOSOPHY:
348
00:12:35,821 --> 00:12:38,858
THE BEST UNIVERSAL TELEVISION
ISN'T SCRIPTED, IT'S REAL !
349
00:12:38,858 --> 00:12:40,593
WE STARTED WITH
GREAT SHOWS LIKE
350
00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:42,328
"WHO WANTS TO
MARRY A GELGAMEK ?"
351
00:12:42,328 --> 00:12:44,063
AND "ANTARES 6
MILLIONAIRE".
352
00:12:44,063 --> 00:12:45,364
AND THEN WE HAD
A BIG HIT WITH
353
00:12:45,364 --> 00:12:47,099
"GET ME OUTTA HERE,
I'M A KLIGNANIAN".
354
00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:49,268
BUT THEN, OF COURSE,
THERE'S OUR SIGNATURE SHOW,
355
00:12:49,702 --> 00:12:52,738
THE GREATEST UNIVERSAL
REALITY SHOW OF ALL TIME.
356
00:12:57,510 --> 00:12:58,811
EARTH ?
357
00:12:58,811 --> 00:13:00,546
A FEW BILLION YEARS AGO
WE REALIZED--
358
00:13:00,980 --> 00:13:03,149
WHAT IF WE TOOK SPECIES
FROM ALL DIFFERENT PLANETS
IN THE UNIVERSE
359
00:13:03,582 --> 00:13:06,185
AND PUT THEM TOGETHER
ON THE SAME PLANET ?
360
00:13:06,185 --> 00:13:07,486
GREAT TV, RIGHT ?
361
00:13:07,486 --> 00:13:10,089
ASIANS, BEARS, DUCKS,
JEWS, DEER AND HISPANICS
362
00:13:10,089 --> 00:13:12,258
ALL TRYING TO LIVE
SIDE BY SIDE ON ONE PLANET !
363
00:13:12,258 --> 00:13:13,559
IT'S GREAT !
364
00:13:13,559 --> 00:13:16,595
OUR PLANET IS JUST
A REALITY TV SHOW ?
365
00:13:16,595 --> 00:13:17,897
WELL, YOU DON'T THINK
THE WHOLE UNIVERSE
366
00:13:17,897 --> 00:13:19,632
WORKS THE WAY EARTH
DOES, DO YOU ?
367
00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:21,367
NO ! ONE SPECIES,
ONE PLANET.
368
00:13:21,367 --> 00:13:23,969
THERE'S A PLANET OF DEER,
A PLANET OF ASIANS AND SO ON.
369
00:13:23,969 --> 00:13:25,704
WE PUT THEM ALL TOGETHER
ON EARTH
370
00:13:25,704 --> 00:13:27,439
AND THE WHOLE UNIVERSE
TUNES IN TO WATCH THE FUN !
371
00:13:27,439 --> 00:13:30,910
YOU MEAN THAT YOU ALIENS
ACTUALLY ENJOY SITTING AROUND
372
00:13:30,910 --> 00:13:32,645
AND WATCHING US FIGHT
AND KILL WITH EACH OTHER ?
373
00:13:32,645 --> 00:13:33,946
DUDE, THAT'S MESSED UP.
374
00:13:33,946 --> 00:13:35,247
WHY ?
375
00:13:35,247 --> 00:13:36,549
WHY ! BECAUSE YOU'RE PLAYING
WITH PEOPLE'S LIVES !
376
00:13:36,982 --> 00:13:38,284
YOU'RE TURNING PEOPLE'S PROBLEMS
INTO ENTERTAINMENT !
377
00:13:38,717 --> 00:13:41,320
YEAH, WE'D NEVER
DO THAT ON EARTH !
378
00:13:43,923 --> 00:13:45,224
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
379
00:13:45,224 --> 00:13:47,393
WE HAVE RECENTLY COME ACROSS
AN ALIEN TRANSMISSION
380
00:13:47,393 --> 00:13:50,429
THAT IS BEING BEAMED THROUGHOUT
THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE.
381
00:13:50,429 --> 00:13:52,598
( audience murmuring )
382
00:13:52,598 --> 00:13:55,201
WHEN DECODED,
IT LOOKS LIKE THIS.
383
00:14:07,346 --> 00:14:08,647
WHAT DOES IT MEAN ?
384
00:14:08,647 --> 00:14:09,949
IT'S SIMPLE
MATHEMATICAL LANGUAGE
385
00:14:09,949 --> 00:14:12,117
THAT CAN BE UNDERSTOOD
THROUGHOUT THE SOLAR SYSTEM.
386
00:14:12,117 --> 00:14:15,588
TRANSLATED INTO OUR LANGUAGE,
IT LOOKS LIKE THIS.
387
00:14:16,021 --> 00:14:17,756
( announcer )
This Janamon at 8:00
388
00:14:17,756 --> 00:14:19,491
it's everyone's
favorite show--
389
00:14:19,491 --> 00:14:20,793
Earth !
390
00:14:21,227 --> 00:14:23,395
It's been 100 galgamars
since we first took species
391
00:14:23,395 --> 00:14:24,697
from 17 different planets
392
00:14:25,130 --> 00:14:27,299
and put them all together
on the same planet !
393
00:14:27,733 --> 00:14:31,203
They've fought
and fallen in love.
394
00:14:31,203 --> 00:14:32,938
What will happen
this galgamar ?
395
00:14:32,938 --> 00:14:34,673
Tune in Janamon at eight
to find out !
396
00:14:35,107 --> 00:14:38,143
It's Earth, onFOGNL !
397
00:14:40,312 --> 00:14:44,216
I'M AFRAID THAT EARTH,
ALL OF EARTH,
398
00:14:44,216 --> 00:14:49,421
IS NOTHING BUT AN INTERGALACTIC
REALITY TV SHOW.
399
00:14:50,289 --> 00:14:51,590
MY GOD.
400
00:14:52,024 --> 00:14:52,892
WE'RE FAMOUS !
401
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:55,494
( cheering )
402
00:14:56,362 --> 00:14:57,663
WAIT, YOU DON'T
UNDERSTAND.
403
00:14:57,663 --> 00:14:59,398
I'M ON TV !
I'M ON TV !
404
00:14:59,398 --> 00:15:02,001
OH, THIS IS SO AWESOME !
405
00:15:08,507 --> 00:15:10,676
THAT SHOULD GET THE RELAY
WORKING AGAIN.
406
00:15:10,676 --> 00:15:12,411
ALRIGHT, EARTHLINGS,
IF YOU'LL STEP OVER THIS WAY
407
00:15:12,411 --> 00:15:15,014
WE'LL ERASE YOUR MEMORIES
AND GET YOU BACK TO EARTH.
408
00:15:15,014 --> 00:15:16,749
( phone rings )
OH, EXCUSE ME.
409
00:15:16,749 --> 00:15:18,050
THIS IS NAJIX.
410
00:15:18,050 --> 00:15:19,351
UH-HUH.
411
00:15:19,351 --> 00:15:21,086
OH, NO.
412
00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:22,821
OH, NO, REALLY ?
413
00:15:23,255 --> 00:15:25,424
IT'S FOR SURE ?
414
00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:27,593
ALRIGHT, I'LL BREAK
THE NEWS TO EVERYONE.
415
00:15:27,593 --> 00:15:30,195
NO, NO, I UNDERSTAND,
THANKS.
416
00:15:30,195 --> 00:15:32,364
WELL, YOU KIDS CAN GO
BACK TO EARTH IF YOU WANT
417
00:15:32,364 --> 00:15:34,099
BUT I'M AFRAID IT WON'T
BE THERE FOR LONG.
418
00:15:34,099 --> 00:15:35,401
THE SHOW'S BEEN CANCELED.
419
00:15:35,834 --> 00:15:37,136
WHAT ?
WHO CANCELED US ?
420
00:15:37,136 --> 00:15:38,437
THE UNIVERSAL
NETWORK HEADS.
421
00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:39,738
THEY SAY THE EARTHLINGS HAVE
BECOME AWARE OF THE SHOW
422
00:15:39,738 --> 00:15:41,907
SO IT WON'T BE
FUNNY ANYMORE.
423
00:15:41,907 --> 00:15:43,208
OH ( bleep ),
DID WE DO THAT ?
424
00:15:43,208 --> 00:15:44,944
EVERYONE, CAN I HAVE YOUR
ATTENTION REAL QUICK ?
425
00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:46,679
UH, LOOK, I JUST GOT A CALL
FROM THE NETWORK
426
00:15:46,679 --> 00:15:48,847
AND I'M AFRAID EARTH
HAS BEEN CANCELED.
427
00:15:48,847 --> 00:15:50,149
( all )
AWW...
428
00:15:50,149 --> 00:15:51,884
NOW, NOW,
IT WAS A GREAT RUN
429
00:15:51,884 --> 00:15:54,486
AND I THINK WE SHOULD ALL
BE REALLY PROUD.
430
00:15:54,486 --> 00:15:56,655
( slight applause )
431
00:15:56,655 --> 00:15:57,523
LET'S CALL IN
THE DEMOLITION CREW
432
00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:59,258
TO STRIKE THE EARTH
FOR RESOURCES.
433
00:15:59,258 --> 00:16:00,559
WAIT, WAIT !
THEY CAN'T DO THIS !
434
00:16:00,559 --> 00:16:01,860
LET US TALK TO
THE NETWORK HEADS !
435
00:16:02,294 --> 00:16:03,162
WOULDN'T DO ANY GOOD.
436
00:16:03,162 --> 00:16:04,463
DUDE, WE HAVE TO TRY !
437
00:16:04,463 --> 00:16:06,198
PLEASE TAKE US TO THEM,
PLEASE !
438
00:16:06,198 --> 00:16:08,367
ALRIGHT, KIDS, WE'LL TAKE YOU
TO THE NETWORK HEADS,
439
00:16:08,367 --> 00:16:10,536
BUT I WARN YOU,
NOBODY HAS EVER GOTTEN
440
00:16:10,536 --> 00:16:12,705
THE EXECUTIVES
TO UN-CANCEL A SHOW
441
00:16:12,705 --> 00:16:14,006
ONCE THE CALL
HAS BEEN MADE.
442
00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:15,741
NOBODY.
443
00:16:24,950 --> 00:16:27,553
( beeping )
444
00:16:39,264 --> 00:16:41,867
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT ?
445
00:16:41,867 --> 00:16:43,168
THERE'S A HUGE SHIP OF SOME KIND
IN EARTH'S ORBIT.
446
00:16:43,168 --> 00:16:45,337
BUT WHY ?
447
00:16:45,337 --> 00:16:47,072
WAIT A MINUTE--
CHAOS THEORY !
448
00:16:47,072 --> 00:16:48,374
CHAOS THEORY ?
449
00:16:48,374 --> 00:16:50,542
CHAOS THEORY, IT WAS FIRST
THOUGHT OF IN THE '60s, 60.
450
00:16:50,542 --> 00:16:54,013
THAT'S THE NUMBER OF EPISODES
THEY MADE OF "PUNKY BREWSTER"
451
00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:56,181
BEFORE IT WAS CANCELED.
CANCELED ?
452
00:16:56,181 --> 00:16:57,049
HUH ?
453
00:16:57,483 --> 00:16:59,218
DON'T YOU SEE ?
THE SHOW IS OVER.
454
00:16:59,218 --> 00:17:00,953
THE ALIENS ARE
CANCELING EARTH !
455
00:17:01,387 --> 00:17:02,254
OH MY GOD.
456
00:17:02,254 --> 00:17:04,857
WE HAVE TO STOP THEM !
457
00:17:05,290 --> 00:17:08,327
( announcer )
Welcome to planet Fognl,
home of the Joozians,
458
00:17:08,761 --> 00:17:12,664
who control all media
in the universe !
459
00:17:12,664 --> 00:17:16,135
CAN I HELP YOU ?
460
00:17:16,568 --> 00:17:19,171
OH, UH, WE HAVE A 3:00 MEETING
WITH THE NETWORK HEADS.
461
00:17:19,605 --> 00:17:21,340
WHERE ARE YOU
VISITING FROM ?
462
00:17:21,340 --> 00:17:22,207
UH, EARTH.
463
00:17:22,207 --> 00:17:23,509
OOH !
464
00:17:23,509 --> 00:17:24,810
I WATCH THAT SHOW
ALL THE TIME !
465
00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:26,111
( laughing )
466
00:17:26,111 --> 00:17:27,413
OH SURE, COME ON IN,
EARTHLINGS !
467
00:17:27,846 --> 00:17:29,148
WE'RE JUST CHECKING
OUR NEW SHOW.
468
00:17:29,148 --> 00:17:31,750
WE TOOK 100 BEINGS FROM
THE PLANET MARKLAR
469
00:17:31,750 --> 00:17:33,919
AND PUT THEM ON AN ASTEROID
WITH SENTIENT BEINGS
470
00:17:33,919 --> 00:17:35,220
FROM THE HORSEHEAD NEBULA.
471
00:17:35,220 --> 00:17:36,522
IT'S A RIOT !
472
00:17:36,522 --> 00:17:38,690
THEY HATE EACH OTHER !
473
00:17:40,859 --> 00:17:43,028
MIGHTY, POWERFUL
NETWORK EXECUTIVES.
474
00:17:43,462 --> 00:17:45,197
WE HAVE COME A GREAT
DISTANCE IN ORDER TO--
475
00:17:45,197 --> 00:17:47,366
I'M STARVING, YOU EARTHLINGS
HAVE HAGLAR YET ?
476
00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:48,667
OH YEAH, LET'S DO HAGLAR.
477
00:17:49,101 --> 00:17:49,968
WHERE DO YOU
WANT TO GO,MORONIS?
478
00:17:50,402 --> 00:17:51,703
NOT ON A FLECKMAR,
TOO CROWDED.
479
00:17:51,703 --> 00:17:53,439
OOH !
BLACH-GA-FELCH !
480
00:17:53,872 --> 00:17:55,174
OH, BLACH-GA-FELCH,
PERFECT !
481
00:17:55,174 --> 00:17:58,644
THIS PLACE IS FANTASTIC.
482
00:17:58,644 --> 00:18:00,379
LOOK, WE JUST WANT TO TALK
TO YOU ABOUT THE SHOW.
483
00:18:00,379 --> 00:18:02,548
PLEASE DON'T CANCEL US,
PLEASE.
484
00:18:02,548 --> 00:18:04,283
I'M SORRY, EARTHLINGS,
485
00:18:04,283 --> 00:18:06,885
BUT YOU HAVE TO REALIZE
THE UNIVERSE IS A BUSINESS.
486
00:18:06,885 --> 00:18:09,054
YOU MADE IT TO 100 EPISODES,
YOU SHOULD BE PROUD.
487
00:18:09,054 --> 00:18:11,657
YEAH, A SHOW SHOULD NEVER
GO PAST 100 EPISODES
488
00:18:11,657 --> 00:18:13,392
OR ELSE IT STARTS TO GET STALE
489
00:18:13,392 --> 00:18:15,994
WITH RIDICULOUSLY STUPID
PLOT LINES AND SETTINGS.
490
00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:19,898
HERE'S YOU ORDER OF GLAGAPLATZL
FOR GNAKLEBERG !
491
00:18:19,898 --> 00:18:23,802
BUT, SIRS, WE THINK OUR SHOW
IS JUST GETTING GOOD.
492
00:18:23,802 --> 00:18:25,971
I MEAN, WE'RE JUST NOW
STARTING TO SEE PEOPLE
493
00:18:25,971 --> 00:18:27,706
GETTING REALLY PISSED OFF
AT EACH OTHER.
494
00:18:27,706 --> 00:18:29,441
OH MY GOD,
THIS IS GREAT !
495
00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:31,176
YOU MUST HAVE SOME
JOOZIAN ANCESTRY.
496
00:18:31,610 --> 00:18:32,478
TELL US ABOUT IT.
497
00:18:32,478 --> 00:18:34,213
LOOK, THERE'S FIVE BILLION
PEOPLE ON OUR SHOW,
498
00:18:34,213 --> 00:18:35,514
YOU CAN'T JUST UP AND
CANCEL ON US.
499
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:38,984
OH MY GOD, WILL YOU LOOK AT THE
HEKMAS ON THAT JOOZIMAK ?
500
00:18:38,984 --> 00:18:40,285
DUDE, WE'RE TRYING TO
SAVE OUR PLANET HERE !
501
00:18:40,285 --> 00:18:42,020
LET'S TAKE THE EARTHLINGS
TO A HEKMA BAR !
502
00:18:42,454 --> 00:18:44,623
OH, YEAH !
503
00:18:47,226 --> 00:18:49,394
OH YEAH, LET'S SEE
THOSE HEKMAS !
504
00:18:49,394 --> 00:18:50,696
SIRS, IF YOU'LL--
505
00:18:50,696 --> 00:18:53,298
OH, MAN,
I AM SO WASTED.
506
00:18:53,298 --> 00:18:55,901
HEY, YOU EARTHLINGS WANNA
TRY A LITTLE BLANCGH ?
507
00:18:56,335 --> 00:18:58,504
( snorting )
508
00:19:00,672 --> 00:19:01,974
OH, YEAH !
509
00:19:02,407 --> 00:19:03,709
OH, GLUCK YEAH !
510
00:19:03,709 --> 00:19:05,444
KENNY !
511
00:19:05,444 --> 00:19:07,179
MAN, SCREW THIS PLACE !
512
00:19:07,179 --> 00:19:08,914
LET'S GO GET A HOTEL ROOM
AND A HOOKER !
513
00:19:08,914 --> 00:19:10,215
OH, YEAH !
514
00:19:12,818 --> 00:19:14,987
WE HAVE TO FIND A WAY
TO STOP THOSE ALIENS !
515
00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:17,156
THEIR SHIP IS MASSIVE,
THERE'S NO WAY TO STOP IT !
516
00:19:17,156 --> 00:19:18,457
WAIT A MINUTE--
JACKETS !
517
00:19:18,457 --> 00:19:19,758
OH, NO.
518
00:19:19,758 --> 00:19:21,493
IF PEOPLE DON'T WEAR JACKETS
THEY COULD GET COLD !
519
00:19:21,493 --> 00:19:24,963
A COLD IS CAUSED BY A VIRUS,
A VIRUS, A COMPUTER VIRUS !
520
00:19:24,963 --> 00:19:26,698
WE COULD MAKE
A COMPUTER VIRUS
521
00:19:26,698 --> 00:19:28,867
AND SEND IT TO THEIR SHIP
TO DISABLE THEIR COMPUTERS !
522
00:19:29,301 --> 00:19:33,205
THAT DOESN'T MAKE
ANY GODDAMN SENSE !
523
00:19:33,205 --> 00:19:36,241
OH YEAH, HOOKER,
OH YEAH !
524
00:19:36,241 --> 00:19:37,976
YEAH, WOO, YEAH !
525
00:19:38,410 --> 00:19:41,880
BOY, EARTHLINGS, IS THIS
A PARTY OR WHAT ?
526
00:19:42,314 --> 00:19:45,784
THAT'S IT, BABY, YOU'RE
GETTING MY JAGGON HARD !
527
00:19:46,218 --> 00:19:49,254
YEAH, LET'S PARTY !
528
00:19:49,254 --> 00:19:50,556
YEAH, SUCK MY JAGGON !
529
00:19:50,989 --> 00:19:53,592
YEAH, NOW YOU
SUCK ON MY JAGGON.
530
00:19:53,592 --> 00:19:54,459
OH, YEAH !
531
00:19:54,459 --> 00:19:56,195
STICK YOUR FINGER
IN MY THRUSHER !
532
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:58,797
OH YEAH, SUCK IT,
SUCK THAT JAGGON !
533
00:19:58,797 --> 00:20:00,966
DUDE, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT
WE'RE SEEING RIGHT NOW,
534
00:20:00,966 --> 00:20:03,569
BUT I HAVE A FEELING
IT'S REALLY, REALLY WRONG.
535
00:20:03,569 --> 00:20:05,304
OH YEAH !
OH YEAH, YEAH !
536
00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:12,244
OH, GOD...
MY HEAD.
537
00:20:12,244 --> 00:20:13,545
WHAT DID WE DO ?
538
00:20:13,979 --> 00:20:17,015
OH, MAN, I CAN'T BELIEVE
I SUCKED YOUR JAGGON.
539
00:20:17,015 --> 00:20:19,184
OH GOD, WE DID SUCK
EACH OTHER'S JAGGONS !
540
00:20:19,184 --> 00:20:21,353
YOU KIDS WON'T TELL ANYBODY
ABOUT THIS, RIGHT ?
541
00:20:21,353 --> 00:20:22,654
NO.
542
00:20:22,654 --> 00:20:24,389
NO, WAIT--
WE WON'T TELL ANYBODY
543
00:20:24,389 --> 00:20:26,124
IF YOU DON'T
CANCEL OUR SHOW.
544
00:20:26,124 --> 00:20:27,859
OOH, I KNEW
THAT WAS COMING.
545
00:20:27,859 --> 00:20:29,595
THEY'VE REALLY GOT US
BY THE NEZMINS.
546
00:20:29,595 --> 00:20:31,330
THE EARTH SHOW
CAN STILL BE GOOD.
547
00:20:31,330 --> 00:20:33,498
JUST ERASE EVERYONE'S MEMORY
SO WE DON'T KNOW WE'RE A SHOW !
548
00:20:33,498 --> 00:20:35,667
I'M SURE YOU'LL SEE THAT IF
YOU GIVE OUR WORLD TIME
549
00:20:35,667 --> 00:20:37,836
IT WILL BECOME EVEN MORE
OUTRAGEOUS AND VIOLENT.
550
00:20:37,836 --> 00:20:40,005
THERE'S EVEN WORLD WAR III
TO LOOK FORWARD TO !
551
00:20:40,005 --> 00:20:41,740
AND THEN WE WON'T HAVE TO
SHOW ANYBODY THE PICTURE
552
00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:43,041
KENNY HAS OF YOU GUYS SUCKING
EACH OTHER'S JAGGONS.
553
00:20:43,475 --> 00:20:44,776
ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT,
EARTHLINGS !
554
00:20:45,210 --> 00:20:46,511
YOU WIN.
555
00:20:46,511 --> 00:20:47,379
THE SHOW CAN STAY ON.
556
00:20:47,813 --> 00:20:48,680
ALRIGHT ! ALRIGHT !
557
00:20:49,114 --> 00:20:51,283
JUST BE SURE TO KEEP UP
THE WARS AND VIOLENCE.
558
00:20:51,283 --> 00:20:53,452
WELL, WE'VE GOT A 5:00
WITH THE YERKA PRODUCERS.
559
00:20:53,452 --> 00:20:54,753
NICE MEETING YOU,
EARTHLINGS.
560
00:20:54,753 --> 00:20:56,922
BYE !
561
00:20:58,657 --> 00:21:00,392
WHOA, CARTMAN LOOKS LIKE
YOU DIDN'T GET MUCH
SLEEP LAST NIGHT.
562
00:21:00,392 --> 00:21:01,693
THAT'S CAUSE
I WAS HAVING THESE
563
00:21:02,127 --> 00:21:03,862
BOGUS NIGHTMARES
ALL NIGHT LONG.
564
00:21:03,862 --> 00:21:04,730
HEY YOU GUYS, LOOK !
565
00:21:04,730 --> 00:21:06,031
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT ?
566
00:21:06,031 --> 00:21:07,766
I DON'T KNOW.
567
00:21:07,766 --> 00:21:08,634
HELLO THERE, CHILDREN !
568
00:21:09,067 --> 00:21:09,935
( all )
HEY, CHEF.
569
00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:11,236
CHEF, KENNY HAS A PICTURE
OF TWO GREEN THINGS
570
00:21:11,236 --> 00:21:13,405
SUCKING EACH OTHER'S
SHOULDERS.
571
00:21:13,405 --> 00:21:15,574
WHAT IS IT, CHEF ?
572
00:21:15,574 --> 00:21:16,875
I DON'T KNOW,
573
00:21:16,875 --> 00:21:18,176
BUT SOMETHING TELLS ME
THIS PICTURE MIGHT BE
574
00:21:18,176 --> 00:21:19,478
VERY IMPORTANT, CHILDREN.
575
00:21:19,478 --> 00:21:22,514
YOU SHOULD
HANG ON TO IT.
576
00:21:22,514 --> 00:21:23,382
( announcer )
ATTENTION UNIVERSE !
577
00:21:23,382 --> 00:21:24,683
BE SURE TO TUNE IN
NEXT WEEK
578
00:21:25,117 --> 00:21:26,852
FOR ANOTHER EXCITING
EPISODE OFEARTH!
579
00:21:26,852 --> 00:21:29,454
THE ASIANS ARE REALLY STEWED
AT THE RUSSIANS.
580
00:21:29,454 --> 00:21:31,623
THE ZEBRAS TRY TO GET ALONG
WITH THE BUFFALO.
581
00:21:31,623 --> 00:21:35,093
AND AMERICANS AND IRAQIS
HAVE AN ALL-OUT BRAWL !
582
00:21:35,093 --> 00:21:36,828
IT'S OUTRAGEOUS FUN
AND IT'S ALL NEW !
583
00:21:36,828 --> 00:21:38,997
EARTH !
ON FOGNL !
584
00:21:41,166 --> 00:21:42,467
Captioning made possible by
COMEDY CENTRAL
585
00:21:43,769 --> 00:21:45,504
Captioned by
Soundwriters™
586
00:21:55,047 --> 00:21:58,517
♪ LET ME SEARCH IT
GONNA WORK IT... ♪♪
38781
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