Original subtitles

Dear Simon,

I know it's been a minute since I've reached out,

and you were probably thinking, "Wow!

I bet Victor finally has his shit together."

But Simon, my shit is not together.

My shit is...

Well, it's shit.

Benji wants to take a break from us.

We've been far from perfect lately,

but I thought we were strong enough to get through anything.

And now, I'm not so sure.

So, I told off a priest.

Well, "telling off" might be a bit strong.

Nobody had to hold my earrings,

but I did tell Father Lawrence that we're quitting the church.

Cool.

And I found another congregation in Five Points.

Their website says all are welcome,

which is Catholic for less homophobic.

Victor...

- Is everything okay? - Not really.

Well, is it something you want to talk about?

No.

If you're wondering how he gets his hair that perfect,

there isn't a pomade in the world that can do that for you.

Should we shave his head in his sleep and make a wig?

We could share it.

Okay, that was funny. Are you okay?

Benji and I are taking a break. It was his choice.

- What? Why? - I don't know. A lot of things.

I mean, he wasn't too thrilled that I told you that he was in AA.

- Oh, no! I, I didn't tell anyone, I swear. - No, no, no.

I know, and it's, it's not your fault.

I shouldn't have told you.

But it's not just that. We've been fighting about everything lately.

He says he needs some time to figure out if we still make sense.

And now I just have to sit next to him in pre-calc

and pretend like I'm not dying inside.

How are you supposed to learn complex math

while having gay relationship drama?

Yeah, high school is demented.

Hey, what do you say we get out of here?

What do you mean? Like, skip school?

Scandalous, I know, but it kind of works out for me, too.

I have this test in third period,

and I did not finish Lord of the Flies.

Who knew a bunch of hot British boys getting stranded on an island

could be so boring?

You're right. Let's get out of here.

But let's be stealthy about it. I don't want to get in trouble.

Then fix your face and unclench your butt cheeks,

'cause you look like you just murdered your family,

embezzled your inheritance,

and started over in Boca Raton.

I watch a lot of true crime.

Ah, not that way.

That's where Mrs. Potemkin goes to chain smoke

and cry about her dead marriage.

I should teach a master class on skipping school.

Although, I'd probably skip that, too.

So, wait, how do you not get in trouble?

Doesn't the school call your parents?

Nope. I just email the school office

saying it's some made up Muslim holiday.

None of those old ladies in admin

want to go down for religious perse-cush.

Yeah, you see, I don't think "Muslim holiday" is gonna work for me.

What are you doing?

Hi, this is Victah Salazah's mothah, Isabel?

Why are you pretending to be my mom and not my dad?

Um, I don't know what your dad sounds like.

- Well, neither do they! - Okay, well, it's too late to switch now.

Ah, yeah, sorry about that. Um,

look, Victah's not gonna be able to come in today.

Yeah, he'd kill me for telling you this,

but he got into some bad chimichangas last night,

and let's just say he got it comin' out of both ends.

Yeah... Aw, thank you so much.

Aw, that's so sweet. Adios!

She said to feel better and to drink lots of fluids.

I hate you so much right now.

I never would have pegged you as the "cutting class" type.

Hey. Don't judge a book by it's extremely chic cover.

It's just sometimes I feel like

all these Creekwood kids are living in their happy little bubbles,

and I'm not like any of them.

Sometimes I feel outside of it all.

And when that happens, I need to get out from under

the tragic fluorescent lighting and breathe.

But today's your day to breathe. So, what do you want to do?

I don't know.

I can't stop thinking about Benji.

I mean, we were supposed to go to Mia's dad's wedding this weekend,

- and now... - Okay, so we just have to get your mind off of Benji.

But everywhere reminds me of him.

Okay, then we'll go somewhere you and Benji have never been before.

A Benji memory-free zone.

I know just the place.

- Here you go. Enjoy. - Thanks.

Okay, what am I eating, and why haven't I had it before?

It's Tahchin. A crispy rice cake, with chicken.

Anytime I'm in my feels, I have to have that.

It kind of reminds me of my mom's arroz con pollo.

She used to make it every Sunday after church.

Used to?

Well, now that she and my dad are separated...

Oh, yeah. How are things going with that, by the way?

I don't know. It's on the long list of things that we don't talk about.

What about you? How are things with your parents?

Actually...

Remember when I told you

I didn't finish Lord of the Flies last night?

It's 'cause I was coming out to my parents.

What? Rahim! Why didn't you tell me before?

I don't know. You were so bummed about Benji,

and I didn't want to make today about me.

So, how did you do it?

This is humiliating,

but I wrote everything I wanted to say on a notecard,

because I knew once I took it out, I wouldn't be able to bail.

And I didn't. I, I read it to them,

and they sat there for what felt like six years,

and my, my dad said, "I'm really happy you finally told us."

Wait. They were glad that you "finally" told them?

Okay, so apparently, my mom had discovered

my internet search history when I was twelve,

and saw that I had been Googling "Tom Holland" plus "penis."

No!

- Tom Holland? - I know.

Anyway, thank you.

For helping me be brave.

No. Rahim, you did that all on your own.

I'm... I'm really proud of you.

Is something going on?

No. Sorry.

Victor?

Dad?

Victor, why aren't you in school?

That, that would be my fault, Mr. Salazar.

I had to miss school today for the

Muslim Festival of a Thousand Pistachios.

Very sacred.

Uh, Victor had a free period,

and he was kind enough to bring me my homework

so I wouldn't fall behind.

- I'm Rahim, by the way. - Hi.

Oh, uh, sorry. Uh, Victor, this is, uh, my friend Shelby.

So nice to meet you, Victor.

Your dad talks about you all the time.

He does? When?

PFLAG. Shelby and I, we know each other from the meetings.

Uh, Victor, can we talk for a second?

Happy holidays. I just love pistachios.

- Are you on a date right now? - Shelby and I...

Yes, we're seeing each other.

It's very new. It's too new to tell you about, but here we are.

- Does Mom know? - She does.

So, that's it?

You guys are never getting back together? You're just giving up on her?

Victor, I'm not giving up on anything.

You're dating other people. You're not even trying anymore.

Look, I think that this is a much bigger conversation.

And maybe me catching you skipping school

is not the best time to have it.

Your friend over there, he's pretty smooth,

but I wasn't born yesterday.

Are you gonna tell Mom?

If you head back to class now, maybe I'll forget to mention it.

I can't believe my dad got a girlfriend.

God. How could he do this to my mom?

- Can I ask you a personal question? - Mmm.

Do you think your parents should get back together?

Like, do you think that they're right for each other?

I don't know. I mean, last year, they were constantly fighting.

And sometimes I just wished they'd get the hell away from each other

and give us all a break.

Before that...

They were pretty magic together.

I mean, they were our age when they started dating.

But maybe that's part of the problem. You know, like...

what are the odds that the first person you date is the person

you're supposed to end up with?

Okay, I don't care what your dad says. We're not going back to school.

It's time to turn the self-care up to an eleven.

You know, I've never actually had a pedicure before.

You're acting like this is news, but those hooves are rough.

Linda, Michelle, the number 4 special, please.

"Oh oh aubergine" for me,

and "clear" for my very wild friend over here.

Okay.

Okay, why do you keep grinning at your phone like that?

- Did Tom Holland slide into your DMs? - No!

Okay? It's just this guy Charlie

I've been talking to on one of those apps.

- You know which one. - Well, let me see.

Wait. Are all these headless torsos in Atlanta?

This is just guys nearby.

Turns out there's a ton of gay fish in the online sea.

And all the fish claim to have 9-inch dicks.

Yeah, all the fish kind of lie.

Like when Charlie and I started talking,

we both said we were twenty-two.

But turns out he's a senior at Thadwick Academy.

- Thadwick? - Mm-hmm.

Damn. Your boyfriend's bougie.

He's not my boyfriend, okay? We, we haven't even met.

We just text a lot.

And send the occasional mildly scandalous pic.

You should ask him if he wants to meet up.

What, like now?

You said I get to pick what we do today, and this is what I pick.

I can't believe I'm actually gonna do this.

I feel a pimple starting on my chin,

and this isn't even one of my top-tier outfits.

Well, lucky for you, we're in a spa.

Linda, Michelle, give him the works.

I have $17 in my wallet.

- Give him $17 worth of works. - There we go.

Okay, you sure you don't mind being here?

No. Benji's not working today.

And plus, I know where we keep the pepper spray

in case Charlie turns out to be a sixty-year-old murderer

whose kink is decapitating high school students with a box cutter.

Do you think you're the only person that watches true crime?

Oh, my God. I think that's him.

Okay, I would so let him decapitate me.

- Maybe don't start with that. - Right.

Go.

Charlie. Hi-yee!

I don't know why I just said "hi" like that. I'm nervous.

- It's fine. Nice to meet you. - Yeah.

You look just like your pics, thank God.

A lot of people use those ring light things

that make their pores disappear,

and they end up looking like hideous monsters in real life,

but you don't. So, drop that skincare routine, sis!

Thanks. Thank you.

What's good here?

Ah, well, the chili mocha latte is my personal obsesh.

She's serving spicy, she's serving sweet.

You need her in your life.

"Her" as in the, the coffee?

Uh, why don't you order, and I'll grab us a table?

Hey, um...

Sorry. Uh...

You're, you're just different from how I pictured.

- What do you mean? - No, I just... Like the...

The way you talk.

And like, the way you... are.

Sorry, I...

I tend to go for guys who are a bit more masculine?

No offense.

Oh.

Yeah. It's just my preference.

Yeah. No, if you're not into it, you're not into it.

I kind of wish he'd decapitated me instead.

I'm so embarrassed.

I can't believe you just saw that.

No, he should be embarrassed. What a dick.

No. I, I get it. If he's into "masc" guys or whatever,

I'm never gonna be that.

I'm wearing lavender suede.

Okay, first off, that jacket is fire, and you know it.

And secondly, don't let one stupid boy ruin what's great about you.

Except it's not just one stupid boy.

You know, a lot of people see me as just this funny, fruity beanpole,

- and nothing else. - All right, that's bullshit.

You're tall, you're smart, you're super handsome...

Super handsome?

Stop. I'm just saying that objectively,

you're a very good looking guy.

Okay. Okay, this is the content I signed up for.

Can you start an OnlyFans where it's just you complimenting me?

Maybe in an ASMR whisper voice?

I'm trying to tell you something.

You're a catch, Rahim.

And, uh,

if we went to a gay bar, you would totally clean up.

Well. I'm pretty sure you would clean up at a gay bar, too.

If you were single. Which you're not.

Because things are gonna work out between you and Benji.

Maybe. Or maybe not.

It's just my mom.

Oh. Sorry.

You know what? Why don't we go to a gay bar?

Really? I don't have, like, an ID or anything.

So? I went to one in New York, and they never even checked.

Ugh, no...

Okay, we can do this. Just act confident,

and try to make yourself look older, like, like, beaten down by life.

Right.

- No. It's not gonna work. - God, we're never gonna get in.

Screw it. Come on.

Remember this morning, when you wouldn't even skip school?

Well, I guess you're a bad influence.

♪ Oh, I usually ♪

♪ Wanna keep what's mine ♪

♪ In my private life ♪

♪ But I could let your eyes ♪

♪ Take a peek inside ♪

♪ In my private life ♪

Rahim?

Sorry. This is amazing.

I think if you keep staring, you gotta tip him.

No, I, I mean... all of this.

Everyone's...

This is the first time in my life where I feel like...

I know.

Just give him a dollar.

♪ All I know is when you talk like that ♪

♪ When you talk like that, I don't get tired ♪

♪ Your proximity to me has got me up and wired ♪

♪ Thought I was high... ♪

Go.

♪ Keep it going ♪

♪ Dance till I ♪

♪ Lose my mind ♪

♪ In my private life ♪

♪ Keep it going, keep it going ♪

♪ Dance till I ♪

♪ Lose my mind ♪

♪ In my private life ♪

♪ Keep it going ♪

You are so full of shit!

Your number one hottest thing about a guy is his brain?

Yes! Like if a guy hits me up and he says, "You're handsome,"

but spells it Y-O-U-R?

Immediate block.

Okay, so number one is smart.

- You big liar. Then what? - Then...

- A great smile. - Um...

Symmetrical eyebrows.

I wouldn't be mad at a cute hockey butt.

So, you're into athletes.

Their bodies, yes.

Their personalities, not so much.

What about you? What's your type?

Uh, Benji?

Your type is Benji?

Well, he was the first guy that I ever kissed,

the first guy that I ever dated...

I, I wasn't even sure I was gay until I met him.

I mean, did I have a recurring dream

where Charlie Puth and I were trapped in a jail cell? Sure.

Been there, dreamed that.

But Benji was the only real life guy

that I ever considered going for.

Then you went for it.

And he went for you back.

That's more than a lot of us can say.

Listen, that guy at Brasstown was a total asshole.

Yes, he was, but...

What I meant was...

I've never had what you and Benji have.

- I've never even kissed a guy before. - Oh.

You will.

Hey, it's karaoke time!

The first one of the night is Victor and Rahim!

What did you do?

Sorry, not sorry. Come on.

♪ I hear a lot about sinners ♪

♪ Don't think that I'll be a saint ♪

♪ But I might go down to the river ♪

♪ 'Cause the way that the sky opens up when we touch ♪

- ♪ Yeah, it's makin' me say ♪ - Okay...

♪ That the way you hold me, hold me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪

♪ Feels so holy, holy, holy, holy, holy ♪

♪ On God, runnin' to the altar like a track star ♪

♪ Can't wait another second ♪

♪ 'Cause the way you hold me, hold me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪

♪ Feels so holy ♪

♪ They say we're too young and ♪

♪ The pimps and the players say, "Don't go crushin'" ♪

♪ Wise men say, "Fools rush in" ♪

- ♪ But I don't know ♪ - ♪ Ah-ah, ah, ah ♪

♪ They say we're too young and ♪

♪ The pimps and the players say, "Don't go crushin'" ♪

♪ Wise men say, "Fools rush in" ♪

♪ But I don't know ♪

♪ The way you hold me, hold me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪

♪ Feels so holy, holy, holy, holy, holy ♪

♪ On God, runnin' to the altar like a track star ♪

♪ Can't wait another second ♪

♪ On God, runnin' to the altar like a track star ♪

♪ Can't wait another second ♪

♪ On God, runnin' to the altar like a track star ♪

♪ Can't wait another second ♪

♪ 'Cause the way you hold me, hold me, hold me, hold me, hold me ♪

♪ Feels so ho-o-o-oly ♪

Victor Salazar!

Oh, shit...

We are so sorry, Mrs. Salazar.

But can I just say, vermilion is totally your color.

How did you even find us?

A very worried woman called me from your school,

asking if you were feeling any better

from the poisoned chimichangas that I served you!

We're not even Mexican!

And then I used my motherly instincts to track you down.

Your brother showed me how to do "find my iPhone."

Rahim, can you give us a minute, please?

You're playing hooky now? Hanging out at bars?

- When I tell Papi about this... - He knows already.

About the skipping school part, anyways.

We bumped into him at lunch,

and he was with some woman that he's seeing.

Oh.

Yeah, so much for you and Dad being the loves of each other's lives.

So, is this why you're acting out?

- Are you upset about me and Papi? - No! I mean...

I mean, maybe that's part of it, but...

I think Benji's breaking up with me.

What? When did that happen?

Last night. We got into a huge fight, and now he's not talking to me.

Mijo. Why didn't you tell me about Benji?

Because I thought you might be... happy.

Happy?

Victor...

I need you to hear this.

Your happiness is my happiness.

If your heart is broken, so is mine.

And I know you said that Papi is the love of my life.

That's only sort of true.

You kids are the love of my life.

There is nothing in this world that is more precious to me.

And I know...

that I didn't make you feel that way this year.

I'll never forgive myself for that, but...

I accept you, Victor.

I, I... love every single part of you.

And I will spend the rest of my life

to make sure that you know that. Okay?

And if things with Benji are really over,

I know you'll find another wonderful person.

I... Not "person."

Another young man, who is just right for you.

Why do I keep having these life changing

moments outside of gay bars?

What?

How many gay bars have you been to?

I said "outside of gay bars."

Victor!

Super cool of your mom to give me a ride, by the way.

I don't smell like alcohol, do I?

My mom doesn't even keep mouthwash in the house,

'cause it's a slippery slope.

You smell normal.

Uh, hey...

Um, I just wanted to, uh...

thank you for cutting with me today.

- I had a lot of fun. - Me, too.

Best fake Muslim holiday ever.

I should probably go inside and finish Lord of the Flies.

Here's hoping they get rescued. Or at least find some soap.

Goodnight, Rahim.

Goodnight.

Hey.

It's Benji.

Take the call, honey. I'm not here. Just...

Hey.

Yeah, it, it was weird not talking all day.

I missed you, too.

Uh, I, I, I don't want to rush back into things either but...

No, yeah. I understand.

All right. Bye.

He doesn't want to go with me to Harold and Veronica's wedding.

Yeah. He says, that, uh,

we need some more time to figure stuff out.

I'm sorry, mijo.

But maybe a little more time will be a good thing?

Maybe.

Can we go home?

- Yeah. - Thank you.

- Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com -