Original subtitles

I done told you once.

A hundred times.

Every man's got a price.

Not every man, they don't.

You wanna know mine?

- Hell no.

Well, it's a hell of a lot cheaper

than it should be, I can tell you that.

- Well, no one to blame but yourself.

I ain't makin' excuses.

You know, if ifs and buts were candy and nuts,

we'd all have a merry Christmas, right?

And if I had it over, I probably wouldn't

change nothin', truth be known.

See, a man can want bad.

You ever hear the one about the grave?

- The grave?

Yeah, about that old grave

up in Hoke County.

No, never heard that one.

Hell man, that's the first

one they tell.

It's guaranteed to chill your shit.

I don't care if you're John D. Rockefeller

or Jed fuckin' Clampett, it ain't never enough.

I don't know about them big cities,

but down here, where nobody got nothin',

you get your ass whooped over a fistful of dirt.

Now, this here is the story of a bunch of folks.

Starts off with two youngins, no-count upbringin'.

One of 'em's name was King,

and the other one they called Tyn.

And these boys, they had ripped off some old goat

and gone joyridin' in his fancy Cadillac.

A buddy of theirs squeaked on 'em,

and before you knew it, they was busted

and sittin' in the hot seat in front of the judge.

Damn if both of 'em didn't get maxed out, 20 years a piece.

- King.

Which they would've done

if they hadn't been approached one mornin'

with a business proposition.

-This is the real deal, you know.

- I'm listenin'. Go on and say it.

- All right.

I can give you a tip on the crime of the century.

- Crime of the century?

That's right, bitch. Crime of the century.

- What's that, bumpin' off Quick E Stops?

- Look, you wanna hear it or not, man?

I mean, you know.

Fuck no.

- Yeah, well, I do.

- All right.

You know that old bastard Matheson Hoke?

- What about him?

- That old coot buried himself with the key

to the family jewels, man.

All of it. Took it all with him.

Come on now, Lou.

- He buried it?

- Honest to God Almighty man, millions,

billions, maybe more, man.

There ain't no way of tellin' for certain, man.

- Shit.

- Yeah, I mean this is the chance of a goddamn lifetime.

It's the fuckin' lottery in the goddamn ground, you know.

Matheson didn't have no heirs, didn't leave a will,

man, and to this day nobody knows

what he did with all that stash, man.

- Except you, right?

Except me, man.

All right, Wex, what's the catch?

- Don't cost y'all a dime to take care of Lemonjello.

Goddamn rump ranger.

I'm tellin' you, man, the guy's on my ass

all day, every day.

He's fuckin' everywhere, man.

I piss, he's in the fuckin' john right next to me, man.

- Sounds to me like the boy's got a crush on you.

- Yeah, sounds like puppy love to me.

- Shit, I don't care what it is, man.

I can't take it much more, man.

I don't get no sleep!

I ain't tellin' you what I dream about,

you know what I'm sayin'?

- Hey, Wex, you like apples?

- What's that got to do with anything?

- Well, maybe old Lemonjello come over tonight

and fuck you up the ass.

How do you like them apples?

- Aw shit, man. That ain't funny, man.

You know I hate that shit.

Fuckin' assholes and dicks.

- Hey, hey, cool out, cool out, cool out.

Cole's watchin'.

No man, fuck that silly little bitch.

Now look, this tip is cash money, man.

I mean, if you don't want it,

I got others that do, you know.

I mean, I'll take my business elsewhere, man.

- So, where is it?

- Here, we got a deal?

- Hey, you all get back to work, boys!

Fuck that, man.

- How much you say is in that vault?

- Buttloads, man.

Take your wildest and multiply it by 10.

- Crime of the century, huh?

- You're the dumb-ass of the century.

Now, a lotta folks might cast a cold eye

on wild-ass stories of buried treasure,

but King wasn't one of 'em.

It's easy to get bit by the gold bug

when the only distraction you got is countin' ceiling tiles,

and King, he got swallowed whole.

Shut up!

Mm, mm, mm.

Gullible. Shit oughta be stamped on your forehead.

- Don't cost nothin' to talk about it, do it?

- Wait, wait, wait, hold on a minute.

I remember that one.

Yeah, that's usually what you say

about 30 minutes before I end up flat on my ass

with a blue light in my face,

legs spread, lickin' pavement, right?

- What are you gonna live on when you get out, huh?

Food stamps?

- Cool down, dick boy.

Step at a time.

Hey wipe-ass!

This ain't no disco. Get back to work!

- Yeah, well, how you ever got laid is a mystery to me.

- No, the mystery, right, is why I listen

to your shit in the first place

when I oughta give your ass the walkin' papers.

- Well, let me tell you somethin', boy.

We're gonna make it.

We got it all worked out.

I even took care of old Lemonjello.

- What the fuck kinda name is that anyway?

- Boy's mama loved gelatin.

Got a sister named Orangello.

Pass me one of them smokes.

- You got him to back down?

- Uh-huh.

Told 'em old Wex had dick rot.

- How'd he take it?

- Cried like a baby.

So, what do ya say?

- Well, I'll hold off on them walkin' papers.

- Yeah!

- Just don't go get to shootin' off about that grave.

Now, you might as well

tell a dog not to bark.

See, King is young, full of piss and vinegar.

So, of course he ran his mouth braggin' to his friends.

- Stash in a grave somewhere.

But he kept preppin' to bust out,

'cause him and Tyn both knew there ain't nothin'

you can't get in the joint,

long as you got the patience and the cash.

- Come on, now.

Come on, little baby, come to your daddy.

Oh, yeah.

So he took out a little insurance policy

for the trip ahead.

- Thank you.

And next, he done the obvious thing.

Like I told you, every man's got a price.

Only question is... in what currency?

- Come on.

Mm.

Get the scripts?

- Yeah, but these here you don't get 'til after.

-There might not be an after.

Oh, there's gonna be an after, a happily ever.

- Well, when you hit that yard, you're on your own.

Guards'll be shootin' to kill.

- Yeah, just as long as you ain't.

- I ain't decide yet.

- Well, I know that Tyn for one

would sure appreciate you holdin' off.

- Well.

Hold your hand out.

- Why?

- You want out or not?

- Son of a bitch!

What the hell you doin'? - Here ya go.

What the hell is this for?

- Rabbit's foot. It's for luck.

- This is it.

Been a long time since

I been out in the open like this.

What you talkin' about?

You work these fields every day.

Now, it ain't the same, though, is it?

No, you're right. Bigger.

You're damn right it is.

Hey, I wonder what old Travis is gonna think.

I couldn't give a rat's.

Ain't gonna like it, us out, is he?

Would you?

Knowin' what he done?

Liable to think we're gonna lynch his ass.

They say no one ever escaped from Rutledge before.

- Yeah, that's what they say.

- Now them boys knew

that when things got goin' too good,

the smart money was on a blowup.

Tyn in particular was tighter

than a hawk's ass in a nosedive.

Fortunately, King still had an ace in the hole.

Got two comin' your way, Billy!

Got nowhere to run, boys!

Fuck, if I go down, it's gon' be standin' up.

- You better stop runnin'

'cause I'm gonna beat the livin' shit outta you

for draggin' my ass out here.

"Hey look, we can do it, man.

I'm the fuckin' King, right? I'm the King."

Oh, goddamn, where the hell

did you get that?

Shit, gimme that thing.

So, King's little surprise

got him out of a jam and into the swamp.

Even a blind hog can find a acorn every now and then.

- You ever run?

Thought about runnin'?

Ain't nobody not thought about it.

No, I suppose not.

Problem with runnin' is,

you don't ever stop.

Once you get up in years a bit,

you realize you don't have anywhere to run to.

Which way you think we oughta head?

South. Mexico.

Mexico?

Don't no one go to Mexico no more.

- What, they close Mexico or somethin'?

- Atlanta, maybe.

- Found in two seconds there.

-Well, what the hell we gonna do in Mexico?

- What they always do in Mexico.

- Drink beer and tequila.

- Yep.

- You speak any Spanish?

- Not a word.

- Well, guess we could learn.

- Yep. - Learned English.

- Damned if we didn't.

- Man, I mean shit.

- What?

- Goddamn jailbreak.

- It was pretty good, wasn't it?

You son of a bitch.

- What?

-The hell'd you get that?

- Don't you worry about it.

- Well, give me a bite.

- You didn't bring your own vittles?

Okay, okay.

Here ya go.

- You're a greedy bastard.

There ya go.

So, what you gon' do with yours?

- You know what?

We ain't even out the swamp yet.

You know, you oughta spend some time thinkin'

about that than spendin' money you ain't got.

- What in the hell crawled up your butt?

- Not a goddamn thing.

- I think you'd be a little more pleasant

since you got your ass rescued.

- All I'm sayin', peckerhead, is I ain't gon'

go around blowin' sunshine when I got two days' swamp

in every direction, plus bein' wanted.

So don't be gettin' satisfied on me.

Because life will drop a rock on your head

when you ain't lookin', guaranteed.

You wanna know what I'd do with mine?

Car. Piece of land, maybe.

- Piece of land?

You heard me.

- What about a piece of ass?

- Now, you know I ain't never been a shit-talker like you.

A shit-talker?

Mm-hmm.

- Why, just because I appreciate the finer things,

the romance in life? - King, shut up.

Ow, bitch. Come on!

You wanna hear somethin' funny?

Mm-hmm.

- It's about Jordan.

- Please. Girl's about as funny as a cavity search.

- You know her and I, we used to go at it some.

Damn if every time we done it,

she didn't hoist her legs up over my shoulders.

Her feet would be about six, seven inches

from my face every time we done it,

and I'd just turn my head a little bit

and her toes'd be starin' me right in the face.

And I could always tell when I hit her sweet spot,

'cause her toes would kinda crinkle up

and double over one another and shit, you know,

like, she just couldn't stand it?

- Obsessin' a girl's toes.

You believe that one?

- Why don't you just stick your little dick

in a fire and call it even, huh?

- One of these days, you're gonna figure it out

that a good woman, she ain't easy to find,

and when you find 'em, you keep 'em.

- You know what my idea of a good woman is?

What?

- Be about three feet tall,

toothless, with a six-inch tongue,

flat head to put a beer on.

- Yeah, I can see why that might draw ya in.

Oh, Tyn.

- I seen it.

- Yeah, we musta been away a long time,

'cause that sure do look good to me.

- Damn straight.

They got all fuckin' women's clothes.

- No, I see some unisex.

Come on.

- Hey, King, check it out.

Lord have mercy.

- Hey, you remember Stephanie Maybank?

- Oh yeah, she was a lotta woman.

She was kinda sweet on you, wasn't she?

I never understood that. Woman like her.

- Well, she was rode hard and put up wet.

No wonder she liked you.

Tyn!

- Fuck! I've been shot!

God, this shit hurts!

Damn!

You are one stupid motherfucker, man.

You shoulda had your balls blown off.

- Yeah, well, thinkin' never was my strong suit, was it?

Is it bad?

- Don't freak out on me, man.

That shit makes me laugh.

- I'm not freakin' out.

You all right? - It hurts to laugh, man.

- All right, I ain't gonna make you laugh.

- How's it look?

- Looks like you've been shot.

- Fuck, we ain't gonna make it from here, man.

Come on.

- Just don't be a butthole, and you'll be fine.

Now, when Tyn woke up that mornin',

there's no way he coulda figured he'd be out

three pints of blood by lunch.

Sure, he might have had a premonition,

dreamed hisself naked and singin'

the "Star-Spangled Banner" at the Elk's Lodge fish fry,

but I doubt it.

Like most things in this world,

both good and bad, he came from nowhere

and went back the same way.

- So, I picked her damn yap dog up off the floor,

'cause I figured she wouldn't shoot me

if I was holdin' her shih tzu.

Well, the goddamn dog can tell I'm scared to shit

'cause, I mean, this girl was certifiable,

and I knew it wouldn't take much

for her to squeeze one off.

So, I said, "Marlene, ain't no sense in this!"

And she says, "You put down my Licky," she says.

I say, "I'll put down your Licky,

you put down that goddamn gun."

Standoff.

But the dog is goin' crazy, yappin',

tinklin' all down my leg.

And the phone rings. Ring, ring.

The dog starts barkin' louder.

Yip, yip, yip, yip, yip, yip.

So, the bitch shoots the phone

across the room, hits the thing

right dead center on the five.

So, I take the dog and I hold him over my crotch,

which was a mistake.

I think I got the damn thing aroused.

So now, I'm gettin' nervous, so I say,

"All right, Marlene, somebody's gonna get hurt here.

I'm walkin'.

You'll thank me for this later."

So, I go to put the dog down real nice, you know,

and Licky starts to hump my leg.

I ain't kiddin', man, the dog is goin' nuts.

- Jesus.

- So, there I am, headin' for the door,

this thing flappin' off my trousers,

ya know, I'm kinda high-steppin' it

'cause I figure that's the only way

it would let go, you know.

Well, about three steps from my door,

my foot comes down right on Licky's head.

Cracked his skull like a damn pecan.

- Fuck me.

- And bang! That's when she shoots me.

Hit me in the hip, shattered the goddamn bone.

I got a plate in there the size of your head.

I can't pass a metal detector for shit.

So don't let gettin' shot get ya down, kid!

You'll be all right.

At least you didn't kill no dog.

- Yeah.Yeah, I'm back here countin' my blessings.

- Ain't that a funny thing?

Everybody thinks they got it the hardest.

- I ain't said that.

- Didn't have to.

It's wrote all over your damn face.

Mm-hmm.

You boys gotta play the hand that was dealt to you.

Now, those cops might get you. They might not.

You just gotta resist that temptation

to get back on the wrong side.

Now, I didn't learn that 'til it was too late,

but y'all got plenty of time.

- Be all right.

- All right, you boys take my car.

-You gotta be kiddin' me.

- Go ahead. You need it more than I do.

The insurance'll pay out, so don't think

I'm doin' you no big favor or nothin'.

I'll wait a couple of days before I report it,

give you boys some lead time.

Well, I don't know what in the hell to say.

- Ain't nothin' to say.

Just help a fugitive if you ever get the chance, all right?

- Oh, yeah.

And we ain't never gonna forget this.

- All right.

Son of Licky.

- Cass, you better get your ass in this house.

Them fish sticks gon' be cold as ice.

- Hang on, Marlene, I'll be there directly.

Somethin' about a woman that shoots to kill,

I just can't seem to quit her.

Y'all drive careful.

Get on.

Now, you might wonder where King

could take an escaped con for medical attention.

Well, truth is, they didn't have any doctors

in their personal acquaintance.

They didn't know anyone who could tend

to a livin', breathin' person.

They did know someone, however,

who could tend to a dead one.

- All right, ladies, five card gut.

Deuces and suicide. Kings are wild.

Boo.

Boo, you ain't anted.

- I didn't get me cards yet.

You hear about, Boo,

the fuckin' Arab aerial terrorist, man?

You know my uncle the crop duster?

One from Henderson?

-Yeah, the Para Quad Express.

He took us up one afternoon, man,

and me and Boo were just fuckin' hangin' out the doors.

Brought my 12-gauge, you know,

and we were just lookin' for movement.

Took us right over the trees,

like 200 feet up, tops, right?

So, we come over this clearing and I see

a fuckin' bunch of whitetail, ya know,

about six or seven three-point bucks.

Ya know, I thought I'd fuckin' died and gone to heaven, man.

Hey.

- Am I tellin' the fuckin' story or what?

Fuckin' terrorist.

So, I fuckin' dive on them on crosshairs, man.

I pop one off clean.

Fuckin' Boo, I scoot over and give him the 12-gauge.

Now, I'm like, okay man, I'll give him a shot, right?

So, he gets it ready to go, he's ready to squeeze one off

and we hit this fuckin' turbulence.

As he fires, like, the plane goes like that.

So, I'm lookin' down on the ground for, like, a wounded deer

or somethin' like that, and I notice the fuckin' tire

underneath the plane, man.

Boo shot the fuckin' landing gear.

- He had shot out the tire.

I didn't shoot out the tire.

I fuckin' hit the deer, man!

-What the hell?

- I didn't hit the fuckin' tire.

- Boo, get that.

I didn't hit the fuckin' tire.

This fuckin' Polack-ass dick motherfuckin' tire shooter.

- All right, let's see 'em.

I got three of a kind.

- Ah, full.

Where?

- I said one eyes are wild, son.

- That's a goddamn bald face, Travis.

You said suicide.

- Easy, now, easy.

Percell.

- Well, if it ain't the Bobbsey Twins.

Fresh from the joint.

- Yeah, well, got us into a little scrape,

and as you can see, Tyn here took one.

- What the hell you want from me?

You know where the hospital's at.

- Yeah, but the hospitals don't exactly

roll out the welcome mat for folks like us,

now do they, Travis?

- Well, King, y'all is wanted.

And I can't be violatin' probation

to be harborin' no fugitives.

- Let me tell you somethin'.

My boy here, he done time for you and so did I.

- Look, King, I got legit business here.

This ain't no rest stop for petty criminals.

- Now you listen here, faggot.

Now, I already got a low opinion of your ass.

Don't make me act on it.

- Well, it wasn't a hollow-point, I'll tell you that much,

'cause you'd be dead, son.

Lotta people don't know that.

Look at the entry wound. Not a lotta blood.

Hollow-point blood comes from the exit wound.

- Don't touch the damn thing.

You'll get him infected.

- Well, goddamn, he's bleedin' on the velvet deluxe.

Bring him in here.

Come on, I got ya.

- Lotta people don't know that.

- What?

-The hollow-point.

- They were lookin' for you.

On the news.

Said y'all might be headin' south, Mexico maybe.

- You see that? We made the TV.

- They have pictures and everything.

Said you guys were dangerous, armed and dangerous.

- Oh shit, King couldn't hit the ground layin' down.

Cops were around the other day.

Thought that y'all might be headin' back up here.

Shoot, son, you got lit up.

- Well, don't just stand there.

Ya stitch him up or whatever.

- Well, I think we should stop the bleedin'.

If it got one of the vitals, we're shit outta luck.

I ain't a fuckin' surgeon.

Well, ain't you got nothin'

for the pain?

- Goddammit!

Here ya go, boy.

How's that?

- Bottle.

I'm gonna need the bottle. Gimme the bottle.

- Just slow down. Slow down, son.

One step at a time, like you always tell me.

- Take it easy, kid, just let the pain flow.

- And get the hell outta here with that.

- Excuse me.

- King, the police, man.

They're gon' come back here.

And Travis, he might be able to hold 'em off for a while,

but it don't make no sense for them to get both of us.

- Hey, don't you worry about the police, okay?

We're gon' be just fine.

Long as we ain't got us no rats in here.

- We ain't joined at the hip, for God's sakes.

- You just shush, okay?

You're talkin' with the pain.

- Now, you listen to me, goddamn it.

I always watched your back,

even when I knew you were bein' an idiot.

This ain't got nothin' to do with hangin' in.

So I ain't askin', I ain't suggestin'. I'm tellin'.

You get in that goddamn car

and you get the hell outta here.

- I'm gon' take care of that little piece of business

we talked about, and I'ma set us both up,

and then I'm gonna come back here with the ill-gotten.

You can bank on that, okay?

You boys, you take good care of him, ya hear?

- Okie doke.

- I'm gonna be back in about two days

and it'll be to your benefit to keep him breathin'.

- I'll do my best, but this ain't Marcus Welby.

- Yeah, this ain't Marcus Welby.

He ain't Marcus Welby.

- Hey, King.

- Adios.

- Adios.

He shouldn't have split.

You'd have done the same, I guarantee.

Chips go down, you don't leave your man.

Ain't but one reason to leave your man.

That's for a woman.

Hi.

Did you miss me?

- Like a cramp.

- You ain't seen me in three years

and here I am in the black of night.

- What do you want me to say?

- Well, how about, "Hello, you handsome devil."

That'd be just fine.

- It's over, King. A while back.

- Tyn got shot.

- Is he dead?

- No, I don't think so.

-This ain't none of my business.

- Jordan, I got nowhere else to go.

I know you still got it for me somewhere, don't you?

Now, don't you?

I'm a dog without a home.

Tell me somethin'.

Like what?

- Well, say somethin' for God sakes.

Tell me about your job.

- Ain't nothin' to it much, embalmin'.

Just drain the blood.

You drain it.

Just stick a big, old metal thing in the carotid artery

and just like a keg pump, out it comes.

- Ain't you feel weird messin' with dead folks all the time?

- It's like anything, Tyn.

You get used to it.

- It's interestin'.

I take pictures, sometimes.

- Of dead folks?

— Yep.

- You're a sick bastard.

- Ain't nobody to say what's sick and what ain't.

- Why would you wanna photograph all them people you embalm?

Now that shit's goddamn degradin'.

- You could tell a lot about someone from the way they died.

Like what?

Like what kinda folks they was.

What kinda folks was he?

- That's a tricky one.

He does look a little flushed.

Neck ain't hangin' right.

- Boy got his chain yanked.

- Jumped into the shallow end.

Broke his neck and drowned.

- I'll be damned.

Well, kid was careless.

Wasn't that way, it woulda been another.

- You're a keeper, you know that?

- Don't even try it, King.

This show's one night only.

-Well, you are.

- I ain't sayin' I've been all that good to you, but...

- Good, 'cause you'd be lyin'.

- I don't know why I did all them things I did,

but then, with Tyn gettin' shot and seein' you again,

see, now I realize what a shithead I've been.

I do.

- Keep on. I ain't stoppin' you.

- I'm gonna make it up to you.

'Cause I got me a plan that's gonna change everything.

Tomorrow at this time, I'm gonna come back here

and I'm gonna put us on easy street.

- You gonna rob a bank?

- Well, you wouldn't believe me if I told ya.

But I'm headed for the bigger and the better

and I'm takin' you along.

That's a promise.

- I ain't never got what I been promised.

You get me fixed up.

I'm gone at first light.

-You need a hospital, Tyn.

You ain't got long.

- I ain't goin' back.

-Well, you're gonna die.

- Travis, man, give me somethin' else.

- Tyn, what was King sayin' about that money?

Tell me.

-Travis, please, man.

Man, I'm soberin' up, man.

- Well, you lost a lotta blood.

- Don't leave me, man.

- Ain't much I can do.

- A man shouldn't go alone, you know?

- Yeah, well, you come in alone,

I reckon that's how you're goin' out.

- Wait.

- For what?

- The grave.

- What grave?

- Matheson Hoke.

Supposed to be some loot buried in his grave.

I just ain't ready to leave yet.

That's all.

I ain't ready to leave yet.

I wish you could see what it's like.

- What's like?

- Man, you call this easy money?

I ain't used to no menial labor.

Cletus, you lazy son of a bitch.

- Man, I don't see you on nobody's payroll.

- Just shut the hell up!

Y'all be thankin' me when you're sippin'

one of them liquor drinks on one of them islands

you seen on the cable.

I ain't gonna be thankin' you

for shit if we get caught.

We ain't gonna get caught.

That's easy for you to say.

You ain't still on probation.

Who ain't?

— Boo.

That's 'cause Boo didn't get caught

lightin' a joint in a damn Stuckey's.

Man, how the fuck was I supposed

to know that dick was a cop?

Just shut the hell up.

That was the sheriff.

Same diff.

- "Good friend for Jesus' sake forbear,

to dig the dust enclosed here.

Blessed be the man that spare these stones,

and cursed be him that move my bones."

William Shakespeare.

- Shakespeare?

- Hey, check it out.

How come Ophelia got a smaller one?

Well, that's what they do

when there wasn't no body.

- Boo, you're on guard duty.

- I don't know man, I got the heebie-jeebies.

- Well, it's just meat.

- It ain't just meat.

- It is too, Clete.

- That's Matheson damn Hoke, man,

he owned the whole fuckin' town.

He was a crazy sum' bitch. Wasn't just meat.

- Well, it don't matter what you was.

- It do matter what you was.

- Yeah, well dead, is dead, is dead.

- That's the stupidest fuckin' thing I ever heard.

- Well, don't go gettin' mental on me now, Clete, okay?

Now, he may have been somethin' when he was living.

Now, tell that to the maggots

that's lappin' up his innards, okay?

Them worms eatin' his eyes.

I swear, you're gonna make me sick.

- Okay, when you eat a burger, Clete,

you thinkin' about the cattle, huh?

Huh? Hell no, right?

You're thinkin' about dinner.

In a similar fashion, that's how we gotta think

about our friend, Matheson Hoke.

Dinner, okay?

So, save yourself a heap of guilt

and get on the right of mind perspective, son, okay?

Perception.

- I swear you're gonna make me barf

you keep talkin' like that.

- Yeah, well, just meat and bone Clete, like you.

- Burger.

Shit.

I gotta quit smokin', man.

Hey, Trav, that curse on the gravestone

about the dude who moves his bones?

You think that stuff's serious, man?

I mean, you think the baby Jesus is

lookin' down on us in judgment?

I mean, Hoke was a sinner, right?

I mean, it's all right.

- Come on now, Clete.

Come on down here. It won't be long now, boy.

- Forgive us, Lord, we know not what we do.

- Crowbar.

- Crowbar.

Hey careful, man! Don't wreck it.

- Who gives a duke?

Moment of truth, son.

There she blows.

- Jesus Christ.

There's no goddamn gold.

Fuck are you doin'?

Don't see no jewelry, neither.

- Check the pockets.

- That's a weekend in Myrtle Beach, right there.

We got damn company.

Cletus, get down here, quick. Come on.

Damn, what the fuck was Boo doin' up there?

- We gotta fuckin' make a run for it, man.

Wait for my mark.

- Shh, shh.

- Boo.

- Cletus!

- That boy's smarter than he looks.

- What? - Hey! Boys!

- Smack that boy upside his head.

Come on.

Oh, shit.

Oh shit, it's King.

- Oh no, man.

- Oh, holy Jesus.

What the hell'd ya hit him so damn hard for, Boo?

- Thought he was a cop.

- A cop? Tell that to the hangin' judge.

- How the hell was I supposed to know that he was...

- Shut up, Boo, you idiot!

- Okay, now feel his pulse, come on.

- Oh, nothin'.

Man, you ain't doin' right.

- Well, you do it.

- Look, look, you gotta slap

his face around a little bit, okay?

Put some pressure on his head, stop the bleedin'.

- Oh, shit.

Hell of an idea, Travis, and good job, Boo.

Goddamn grave robbin'. Fuck!

- Hey, I didn't force y'all to do nothin'.

- Travis, you said nothing funny

was gonna , you know.

Oh, Jesus Christ, man.

He's bleedin' pretty bad.

I'm gonna go get the car.

All right.

What the hell for?

- Take him to the hospital.

Hospital?

- Yeah man, you can't just leave him lyin' like that.

The car is two miles from here.

- Two miles, you hear that?

- Well, do somethin' to him, man!

Bang on him and plug his nose up or somethin'!

- Well, if you know so goddamn much,

why the hell don't you do it?

- Well, I don't know how to do it neither,

but I know that that's how you're supposed to do it!

Well, he ain't got no pulse, man.

Check his neck.

Nothin'. Like a log.

- Ain't got no pulse? You sure?

- Yeah, I'm sure. I'm sure Boo fuckin' killed him.

- I beat my dog harder than I beat him.

I didn't kill him.

- Goddamn it, Trav. This ain't no yodelay-hee-hoo!

- Now just pipe down, okay?

Now look, this ain't the end of the world.

- What the fuck you talkin about, Travis?

- Man, we are fucked!

We are goin' up the river.

We don't have a snowball's chance in Hell!

We're gonna fry like bananas!

- Cletus, shut the fuck up.

Okay? You ain't helpin' nothin', for Christ's sake.

Now listen, we got a jam here.

It ain't a little jam, okay.

It's a major fuckin' pickle, right?

And we gotta think through this thing.

We can't get excited, right?

That's how people always fuck up.

They get excited and then they do somethin' stupid, right?

Now, here's the facts.

A). King's dead.

Two, we're fucked as shit.

And C). We gotta get outta here

before someone else comes, right?

- Goddamn it, I knew I shouldn't come

because I ain't never gettin' off probation.

- Clete, stop cryin', okay?

Now, we gotta take the body.

There ain't no choice.

- Where you gonna take him?

It's almost dawn.

You're gonna drag the body for two miles?

- No, Boo, I ain't, okay.

But no body and there's no crime.

- All right, home slice.

So what's the idea, man?

'Cause I just don't see it.

- Look, someone finds the body, Clete,

you, me, and Boo are gone for good.

We gotta put him somewhere.

- Wait a minute, man. Travis, uh-uh.

No. No chance, man.

Nuh-uh, uh-uh. - What?

Look, look, look, Clete, we didn't do nothin' wrong, okay?

It's goddamn bad luck, right?

You wanna get put away for this shit, huh?

Be my fuckin' guest.

Now, where's the last place anybody would look

for a dead body, huh, huh?

A fuckin' grave, right?

- You're a cracker.

Goddamn it.

Jesus.

- Son of a bitch teefed some wheels.

- You gonna take King's wheels?

You're damn right.

Fuck, fuck, fuck me!

- Be gentle! Be gentle, man!

He's dead, Clete.

Whatever you do, just hurry up.

- Look, Trav, man. I'm not sure if this shit is me.

- Yeah, Travis, I'm not sure this shit is me, either.

- Don't give me that cold feet bullshit, okay?

Now, y'all dropped the tab.

Y'all gonna take the trip.

- You should stomp on that.

- Oh, really, Boo?

Come on down, then.

- Wait, wait, wait. Hold on a second, man.

Wait, hey. Shouldn't someone say somethin'?

- Let's just get it done.

- You reckon he was solo?

Can't take any chances.

Who the hell's gonna know him up here?

- Oh, you gonna risk it?

- This ain't happenin'.

This ain't happenin', man!

- Shut up!

- Boo, take the keys.

Lose the car and no BS, no screwin' around.

I don't want you stoppin' for a corn fritter

and a milkshake, you hear me?

- I ain't hungry.

- Where are we gonna meet?

- You know my Uncle Eddie's land?

- Um. - Huh?

- Yeah.

- Hay barn, southwest corner.

Get back there as soon as you can.

- Mind you, Boo, don't mess up like you always do.

- Hey, that ain't his nature.

You need to be more supportive of that boy.

What the hell could be keepin' him?

- I had me a great uncle once. Shot a man.

- Maybe he's lost and his girlfriend's drunk.

That boy could fuck up a wet dream.

- He went a-runnin' back into the swamp.

Didn't think anyone'd come after him

'cause it's hard to track in the bogs, but they did.

They come after him and they got him, too.

Spent the rest of his life in jail.

They always get you, don't they, Trav? Always.

- No, they don't. Not always.

Didn't get Jesse James.

- He wasn't real, 'cause if he was, they'd a got him, too.

Now, Clete

was an expert at worryin'.

Boy could out-worry a cat in a room full of rockin' chairs.

But for once, he was justified.

They had a man bearin' down on them

that was meaner than a redheaded stepchild.

No one is past savin'.

This one went past savin'

and went straight on to hopeless.

'Cause there's devil dogs born,

and devil dogs bred, and when they die,

they'll be devil dogs dead.

You are a tough cookie, you are.

Get in there, you. Now.

Okay, alley-oop. Alley-oop, here.

There ya go.

Whoa, stand up there, now.

How you doin'?

You all right?

Lean up on that just for a second, will ya?

There we go. Come here.

Listen.

Thick noggin, you know that?

- Long as we hock the spoils,

we'll be in the short rows.

- Ain't you feel even a pang of guilt

after all you done to that boy?

- Guilt's for little people, Clete.

I ain't done it. Boo's the one that whacked him.

- Yeah, but you crossed him. Him and Tyn.

It's like when they had to go do time at the joint,

and you stole that goddamn car.

- I can't change that.

They had my papers.

You'd have told him, too.

Damn, you cut the finger off?

Hell yeah.

- Yeah, take it easy, kid.

Now, choice number one.

You hold onto what you got, you keep lyin'.

Upside is, you don't betray anyone.

They'll remember you fondly.

Downside is, it's a quick tide.

They say drownin' is a particularly cruel way to die.

At first, you can hold your breath.

There's a glimmer of hope.

But it starts to hurt.

The CO2 is backin' up the pipes,

so you wait and you wait.

Eventually, those lungs, they hit that panic button

and start suckin' wind regardless of air quality.

It's the water in the lungs that sets off the terror.

Look at me.

Terror.

And this makes for a final, desperate attempt

to reach the surface.

Which, of course, you realize, is gonna be useless.

- It's just a finger, Clete.

- Ain't nothin' past you, Trav.

Let me see it.

- Damn, it's old.

It's got some of that code writin'.

- Gimme that. Gimme that thing.

- I just wanted to look at it, faggot.

- It's foreign.

- Well, it ain't English,

'Cause I woulda done recognized that.

- Choice number two.

You roll.

Lose a few friends.

But you live.

Mixed reviews on that one.

Now, the third choice, that's a tough one.

But there's no death, no dishonor, just to live.

You know, a wolf caught in a trap,

he don't think twice about chewin' off his foot.

You know that?

Wolf wants to live.

You lop it off, I'll let you go.

Some things I'm gonna pay to see.

Here ya go.

- What guarantee I got?

- You're gonna die if you don't, I guarantee that.

- I ain't tellin' you nothin'!

- That's your choice.

It's the critical moments that make the man.

There ya go.

Fuck!

- Smarts, I reckon, huh?

- Nothin', not a word.

Just the police doin' their usual bullshit.

- They ain't on to us.

How the hell you know that?

- 'Cause Boo's loyal. He ain't no rat.

He never ratted out in all the years we knowed him.

- It was Cletus! Cletus!

Cletus!

They was the ones that got broke outta jail

to get that gold!

Oh, shit, my knife.

Yeah, well, Boo got the hind tit

on that one.

Back at the farm, Travis and Clete waited

long enough to get disgusted,

then figured Boo went on a bender.

But the truth is, they was more interested

in what was on that ring than wonderin'

if Boo would show up at the trailer park in a day or three.

Where'd y'all get this, Travis?

I found it in my old man's closet.

Ain't no need to lie, sugar.

Or to pester.

- Well, it's liable to have been stolt.

- As liable as to have plopped out a monkey's ass,

but don't reckon it matters, does it?

- Nothin' against you, Travis.

I just don't want whoever owns it

to come looking for it and blame me.

- Is it valuable?

- Yeah. It's an engagement ring.

See the stone settings?

There's a monogram.

There's a Hoke monogram.

- Is that right?

- Killed his wife.

Whacked her into itty bitty pieces, didn't find 'em neither.

Think she was like his second cousin or somethin' like that.

- Ophelia was just a gold digger.

She married Matheson at 16, with him bein' over 70.

- So, she couldn't satisfy her youthful urges, huh?

- The old man was firin' blanks, huh?

- No, that ain't it.

Story goes that Matheson demanded that she give him an heir

or he's gonna cut her outta the will.

Ophelia found out was she was barren,

couldn't have a child, so she bought one.

- Whoa, wait, she bought one?

- Pretty much anything for sale.

- Matheson never knew the kid wasn't his?

- Kept it a secret.

Wouldn't see him 'til she came to term.

Rumor is he found out.

- Sum' bitch iced her.

- Goddamn.

- Nobody knows for sure.

Now, these rings, they usually come in pairs.

That's right yeah, usually come in pairs.

- Yeah, we ain't got the other one.

- Oh, it ain't in your old man's closet?

- I could check, but, uh...

- Well, by itself, it ain't worth so much.

Not with just one.

Now, with two, then you'd have somethin'.

Huh.

- Yeah, we done seen that.

You speak foreign?

- I was figurin' it was Spanish, maybe.

- It's Latin.

But I can't read it.

Not with just one.

- Well, what's the fee for translatin'?

I mean, if I was to get the other one?

- Life ain't all about money, sugar.

Can you get 'em both?

Man, I thought we fleeced old Hoke.

I musta missed the other ring

in all the excitement.

Come on, Trav, it's Shark Week, man.

Let's forget about them rings.

- Them rings, brainiac, is the key to Matheson's stash.

You watchin'?

- Ain't nobody up here but us.

-This gon' be it, Clete, the big one.

- Betcha he's rotten.

- Probably.

- Face half gone. Don't believe I can stomach it.

- Well, dead is dead.

We've been over this.

Black gold.

- Texas tea.

Do you hear that?

That sound. That damn sound.

That damn scratchin' sound.

- Impossible.

He's been there more than a day.

- Oh, Jesus Christ!

King! Lord have mercy.

What the fuck, Travis?!

- Hush up, Clete.

I gotta think for a minute.

- But it's a fuckin' miracle, man!

- It ain't a miracle.

Boo just didn't kill him.

- We can't just let him die!

Are you crazy? - Do I look crazy?

Now, take a second to buy a vowel.

Man, you ain't in your right mind.

Oh, God, King. Come here, man.

Anybody got any aspirins?

- Just take a few deep breaths.

That's it, buddy. You're all right.

- Yeah, come on, buddy.

- My head is throbbin'.

- Yeah, it's swelled up big like a melon.

Water.

Can't somebody get me some water?

- Hear that? The poor bastard's thirsty.

Needs some fuckin' water, man.

- He needs more than water.

Boy cashed his last check.

- He ain't cashed nothin'.

- Boy don't know his ass from a hole in the ground.

- Travis, what in the hell happened?

- Oh, King, we was wonderin' the same thing.

- Well, I feel like I been mule kicked.

All I remember is I was walkin' along, and then bang!

Stars went out.

- Uh-huh, that is bushwhacked.

Bushwhacked?

- Uh-huh.

- By who?

- Well, that's a good question.

That's a damn good question.

- Well, what are you boys doin' out here?

- Well, Tyn had a hunch that somethin' was up

when you didn't show.

- Oh,Tyn? - Mm-hmm.

Is he all right?

- Oh, yeah, yeah.

Well, I guess you could say he's in stable condition.

Yeah. Right.

- Yeah, boy, he's tougher than a goat titty.

- Two goat tits!

- Look man, why don't we just tell him?

- What, that by accident we shoveled

six feet of dirt on his ass?

- Man, it's gonna be worse if he figures it...

- Hey. - What?

- Why ain't we headed back to the funeral parlor?

- Uh, the fuzz, son.

We got more cops up here than at a damn gun show.

- Mm-hmm.

- We goin' to see Tyn?

- Yeah, just sit tight, beevo.

- Yeah, just sit tight, beevo.

Just... - Now, you just, ow!

- Now, look. Look here.

Best case scenario, he doesn't figure shit.

Okay, he thinks we saved him

and he's proud to share the booty.

- Man, he ain't gon' buy that.

- Now Clete, just imagine spendin' 36 hours

in six square feet of room, okay?

You ain't gonna pop out whistlin' Dixie.

Ain't gonna look too kindly on the sick motherfuckers

that done it to him.

Now, I know King.

He will kill whoever done it.

So, just go on and play out your long hand.

Meditate, whatever the hell you gotta do.

- Man, it ain't gonna work.

- Look, Clete, if you tell him you might as well

blow your own damn nuts off, okay?

- But I'll tell ya one damn thing,

I ain't in the nut-blowin' business.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Trav.

You ain't gonna whack him?

- Well, we killed him one time.

Be a cinch next time.

Now, I respect a man that's willin'

to finish what he starts,

whether it's a killin' or the Sunday crosswords.

With bloodlettin', you got to strike while the iron is hot.

- In the heat of the moment?

Yeah.

If a man stands on the end of a divin' board too long,

he's gonna lose the will to jump.

Can't let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy.

You get a man to start thinkin', most likely he'll back off.

But when it come to Travis and Clete,

thinkin' in general was a risky proposition.

- So, let me get one thing straight.

Now, Tyn told y'all that I might need some backup?

- Yep.

- So, y'all went out to the grave,

and didn't find me, so by process of elimination

you just figured I was in with old Hoke?

- Well, some folks might put that in the miracle category.

- Hell, we're just glad to see you back, brother.

- Yeah, I bet you are.

What if I was to tell you boys,

I thought you were a couple of lyin' sons of bitches?

- I'd say prove it, you damn ingrate.

We didn't have to pull your ass up out of that shit.

- Ooh, look at you gettin' all squirrely.

- No, I just don't like them that

bite the hand that feeds.

- Well, I just got a feelin' that you wasn't out there

outta kindness for your fellow man.

- Well, I just got a feelin' you oughta

stick your headstone up your ass.

- Yeah, you wouldn't piss on your own mama was she on fire,

and the only reason you ever let go of any nickel

was to get a better grip.

You was after the loot, wasn't you?

- Yeah, fuck you, bitch.

- Why don't you just track down the truth for a change?

What happened to Tyn?

- Tyn?

- You heard me.

- That's a negative.

That sum' bitch took a dirt nap.

- Hey, hey!

Now, you guys just stop that right now!

Stop!

- Son of a bitch!

King, Jesus fuckin' Christ!

Oh, goddamn.

Man, I done told you we shoulda told him the truth.

- You killed him, didn't you?

- We didn't kill nothin'.

Wasn't even us who whomped you.

It was fuckin' Boo. Boo done it.

- Boo wouldn't whack a spider off his own dick.

- I swear to you, he didn't mean to.

It was an accident.

- Oh, shit.

- You know, Boo can get a little squee-wampish about things.

- Oh? And he put me in the ground?

- Okay, all right, we're not exactly...

I guess we all done that.

But old man Boo whacked you pretty good.

At that point, we pretty much figured you was G-O-N.

- You didn't have no pulse.

- Jesus, man, we'd never put you in the ground

if we thought you wasn't already dead.

Goddamn it, brother, I swear.

If the situation was reversed,

I'd hope you'd do the same for me.

Hell, I'm just glad everything worked out.

- Ain't shit worked out.

I oughta kill you motherfuckers.

- Oh, motherfuckers, huh?

You're the one who brought Tyn to us, okay?

Shot and half dead.

It ain't our fault he kicked it, okay?

Fuck, listenin' to you's what killed his ass.

- It's true, King.

I mean, that boy was bad off.

Wasn't much we could do.

- And he told you about the grave?

Yep.

- So? Where is it?

- Don't know.

We're on the hunt, though.

- We? I don't see no we.

- Well, maybe you should have your fuckin' vision checked.

- There ain't no need to get yourself all in a wad.

I wasn't all that late.

- I don't wanna hear it.

- Look, I got a good excuse, okay?

- I'm sure you do, from the looks of y'all.

- No shit, Jordan, I mean, it's a pretty fuckin' good one.

- Honey, I told you that I was gonna come back here

and I was gonna buy you your own corner lot

in Margaritaville, didn't I?

Well, here I am.

- Back off, King. I need to finish this.

- Well, y'all can keep the lovers' quarrels to yourselves.

If you don't mind, we got business to do.

- Yeah, well somethin' you boys need to understand,

being businessmen and all, supply and demand.

Now, y'all got the demand to know what's on these rings

and I got the supply to give you the answer.

So, then, the question is price.

- Why don't you give us an invoice or somethin'?

- Yeah, we ain't exactly liquid at the moment.

- I don't give credit.

- Look, honey, I got you covered, okay?

- You got me covered?

- Oh, chill, Miss Dow fuckin' Jones, okay?

Now, your boy here's tryin' to give you a kickback.

Why don't you try trust for a change?

- I'm just gonna keep these rings 'til you get back.

Down payment.

- Only if you got somethin' to tell us.

You wanna back up a hair there, padre, huh?

- "As thou dinst love, but only covet,

all the gold to thee, my beloved."

- Shit, brain teaser.

- Think again. It's plain as day.

Looks like Ophelia shoulda been more careful

about what she wished for.

You wish on a star long enough

you're bound to feel the world owes ya

a few twinkles for the trouble.

Just like old Ophelia,

them boys thought they had somethin' coming.

I'll be damned if they weren't right.

- You don't think she was yankin' us on this one?

- Hell no. It makes perfect sense to me.

- Then I say we get the booty, give her the shaft.

- I say you better shut up before I beat your ass again.

- Hey, hey, hey, hey, here.

You got the crowbars, you got the burlaps,

I got the lantern.

We ready to go?

- We're locked and loaded man.

- Ain't nothin' to it but to do it.

Home again, home again.

Let's pop the hood.

- All right.

On three, let's put a hurtin' on it.

One, two, three.

Come on, bitch. Come on, come on.

Shit.

Damnation.

Oh, shit. There's stairs.

- I elect Travis to go first.

- Shit, it's dark as fuck.

- Like the inside of a dog.

Gimme that damn thing.

Step outta the way, pussies.

Only one way to find out.

- Only one way to find out.

Shit.

- You look a little spooked.

- You don't look too good, neither.

- Neither of y'all gonna win any beauty contests.

Hey!

What?

- Remember that story about that psycho

with a hook for a hand?

- You mean the one that gigged folks in the eyeball?

- Yeah, yeah.

Remember there was this young couple

out smoochin' in the woods one night,

and the girl heard a scratchin' sound.

She was like, "What's that?"

And the guy's like, "Don't worry about it."

Went back to smoochin' on her,

and then she heard the scratchin' sound again.

And then they went home, next mornin' when they woke up,

there was a hook caught in their car door.

- Cletus? - Yeah?

- Shut up.

- True story, man.

Oh, shit, looks deep.

- Yeah, was this in the message?

Cletus, quit crowdin' me

like a goddamn dingleberry back there.

- You two oughta get married, you know that?

- What damn good is gold and whatnot

doin' for anybody down here?

- If it is here.

- Well, if it ain't, it's missin' one hell of a chance.

- All I know is, there better be a damn stack

of Ben Franklins high as my ass.

- This way.

- Let's see.

Holy shit!

Hold this.

- Open her up. Open her up.

- It's show time, boys.

That was easy.

- Come on, open her up, open her up.

- Come on, man.

- Okay, listen. No bullshit, okay?

The past is the past, right?

From here on in, we're on the level.

- All for that.

- That a deal?

That a deal? - Deal!

Steam on!

- Come on. Open her up.

- Yippies.

- Okay, let's get it, boys.

That damn thing.

- Holy shit.

Killed his wife.

Chopped her up into itty, bitty pieces.

- Ophelia.

Cletus.

Cletus.

- Is it real?

- Real as oatmeal.

We're rich as bitches.

- This is it, boys.

Call in the dogs and piss on the fire!

- Party time!

- We're rich!

Beautiful!

More damn money than you can spend in a lifetime!

- More than 50 lifetimes!

- I knew it! I fuckin' knew it!

- Damn thing's locked!

Sum' bitch.

- We're trapped!

We're trapped like rats in a death cage!

Cletus, get the fuck outta my way.

- Back off, man!

Help us! Somebody!

Help! Help!

Help! Help!

Come fix this!

Help us!

As thou dinst love, but only covet,

all the gold to thee, my beloved.

I never got what I been promised.

Ophelia found out she was barren, couldn't have a child,

so she bought one.

A daughter.

A daughter.

- Hi, Jordan.

Those'll kill ya, ya know.

- Gotta die of somethin'.

- That's true.

Sounds like quite a soiree down there.

- I don't hear nothin'.

- Really?

Sounded like your boy, King.

- He ain't my boy.

- Oh, well, that's too bad.

I thought y'all cut such a fine figure together.

- I take it you ain't the gravedigger.

Yeah.

I'm gonna give it to ya this way, sugar.

This is the real skinny.

You're circlin' the drain.

Fixin' to meet your reward.

I hate to tell ya I told ya so, but I told ya so.

No, no, no, no. Don't try to talk.

This is where the road forks.

Me to live, and you to die.

Only time will tell, though, who got the goldmine

and who got the shaft.

- You.

Last cigarette.

- It's almost dawn.

Dawn already?

- Yes.

Well, we're gettin' towards done.

Like it says, "Good friend for Jesus sake forbear

to dig the dust enclosed here.

Blessed be the man that spares these stones,

and cursed be he that moves my bones."

And old Travis, Cletus, and King,

hell, nobody ever found 'em.

That's how they went out, buried alive in gold.

Just missin' persons, like old Ophelia Hoke.

A mystery.

'Course, they found her and Cole laid out by the grave.

He was already gone, her |yin' there

with a gun in her hand.

All the jury seen was a dead cop

and didn't nobody give a flyin' fuck that he was crooked.

Jury deliberated 22 minutes. That's all it took.

Now, I'm gonna give you a little pearl of wisdom.

Don't matter how you squirm or fight,

or spend yourself tryin' to get upstream.

At the end of the day, every man gets what he deserves.

Me, you, every man.

- I have one question.

The child.

What happened to Matheson and Ophelia's child?

Their daughter?

Ain't no tellin'.

- I'll pray for ya.

- Don't wait up.