Original subtitles

[ Dog barks in distance ]

The door unlocked a few minutes ago.

[ Gasps ]

Mwah! We'll miss you, Nancy!

We know your restaurant will be a big success.

You've come a long way in your pasta-making.

[ Whirring ]

Oh.

Okay, so let's break down the Straight-Up Italy car.

I thought we agreed to call it the Mediterranean Republic Car.

There were at least two things that happened in there

that correspond to what we did in Corginia.

We helped someone -- Nancy.

And we fought someone, the mean grandmother

stealing coins from the fountain.

But there was no change to my number!

See, if you look at the logic tree that I've drawn...

Ooh, I like that you use circles on your "I's" instead of dots.

Hmm.

[ Lock clicks ]

Whoa.

Wow!

Anyway, my number...

May I suggest you give yourself more moments of repose

in solving the mystery of your number.

Perhaps if you sleep on it, the answer will come to you.

I can crack this!

I just have to go about it using the Scientific Method.

Interesting bit of Tulip-trivia,

I competed in North-Middle Branch Area

Middle School's Scientific Odyssey Trials.

My team even took home the award for

Best Hypothetically-Proven Hypothesis.

At the very least, give One-One a break from it.

Your logic trees have him more skittish

than a squirrel at a Corgi sock hop.

Ah!

I deserved that.

All right.

I'll put the notebook away -- for now!

Until later, my love.

[ Chittering, barking ]

[ Birds calling ]

Ew! Oh, cool!

Anyone see a door?

Maybe it's like one of those where we have to push a knot,

like a secret passageway?

Because my admittedly petite,

but noble legs keep me close to the ground,

I have often found that if there is not

an answer in front of you, one may come from above.

Right again!

If anyone's keeping track,

I think I'm winning at being right about things.

I've been keeping track and you are!

Maybe we should try building a ladder.

[ Growls, barks ]

Oh! Hi!

Do you know how we can get to the door up there?

[ Grunts ]

Ah, great!

Would you mind telling us how?

[ Clinking ]

[ Gasps ] It can't speak, just like Atticus.

-Huh? -Ugh, man.

This is gonna take awhile.

And then the steps that lead to the door were stolen

by a...giant spider...

made of metal?

-Huh? -Oh!

Like my spindly friend in Corginia.

One-One, that thing wasn't your friend.

Goodness! Was it my mum?

It was trying to hurt us.

The question stands.

[ Stomping ]

[ Clinking ]

A new stairway can emerge

but only if we put our paws on this crystal.

And...

Eat some air! Eating air makes me burpy.

I don't think you can breathe.

You never take my psychosomatic conditions seriously.

Oh! Do we have to sing?

Hmm. Big heart?

Very emotional perhaps or important?

My people have a song about a folk-hero of ours --

"The Ballad of Mustard and Stink Tail!"

It's got drama, pathos, and a bit of bawdy humor.

[ Howling ]

Mnh-mnh.

The crystal doesn't recognize howling?

But it's the ancient language of my people!

Ooh, ooh, me, now! Me, now!

Ahem. Do-do-do-doot.

[ Dial-up modem sound ]

Connection failed.

Don't worry, guys!

I know a super emotional song to try.

High, low

Wherever we go

I just know that our souls twine as one

[ Humming ]

Mmm.

But that song is super emotional!

It's from this movie about a couple

who fall in love on a zeppelin,

and the guy dies when the zeppelin blows up!

Mmm.

Okay. My world has a billion songs.

I'll find one that works.

Get ready, car, because I'm about to blow your heart's mind!

[ High-pitched voice ] I cleave thee

To mine heart

Girl, you know it's so true

That I'm in love with you

And even my pickup misses your face

Ugh!

I hope you choke

On her perfect cookie-cutter world

I can see our future children

When I look into your eyes

Ugh!

I like the ones about unrequited love the most.

It's like, real, you know?

Perhaps if we sleep on it, the right song will come to you.

You know, you suggest we "sleep on things" a lot.

-I am a dog. -Oh, right.

Well, maybe if we just build a ladder.

I'm sorry, but your weird song thing isn't working.

Now, are you guys gonna help me build a ladder, or what?

Ugh! No thumbs!

[ Sighs ] Lot of help everyone is in this car.

Since I couldn't sing it,

this provides the perfect opportunity to tell you

the "Ballad of Mustard and Stink Tail."

Ahem.

Once, a mighty Corgi emerged from the Blue River.

He towered at a gargantuan 2 1/2 feet tall. [ Grunting ]

The shrewd Stink Tail stole all the bully sticks,

and when the pups awoke for the Spring Festival of Plenty,

not even a kibble lay by the hearth.

At a stalemate, Mustard and Stink Tail began trading,

shall I say, some rather salty jibes.

And from that day on, when one saw Mustard the Shiny,

they also saw Stink Tail -- best friends to the end.

To the end of what?

Well, their lives.

-Nice. -Guys, I'm done.

Man, that story is really, really long.

Mustard's story cannot be abridged.

Grump all you want, but this is gonna work.

[ Grunts ] Yes! No more emotional songs. [ Grunts ]

Sorry, buddy, sometimes you've just got to go logical.

Oh, no.

No, no, no, no! It's locked!

[ Grunts ]

No! That makes no sense!

I tried out every possible emotional theme

to find one that would work.

Break-ups, celebrities singing to draw attention

to important social issues,

even songs about going after your dreams.

Like my dream of getting to Game Design Camp,

which is probably over, like, forever ago.

I don't even know how time works on this dumb train!

Hmm.

My heart, me singing.

Not your heart, not you singing.

I thought I was supposed to find a song

that made the crystal feel something.

It has to be a song that's emotional for me?

I've already liked a bunch of the songs I've tried.

How would I know which song I really connect to most?

Hmm.

I thought of "The Ballad of Mustard and Stink Tail"

immediately.

So it could just be the first song I think of?

That's too arbitrary!

Seems worth a try.

Okay.

But if this were the Scientific Odyssey Trials,

this would not win an award --

not even for "Best Last Ditch Effort."

And, yes, that is a real thing.

And, yes, I petitioned to remove the category.

And, no, they didn't.

Fine! I'm singing!

[ Sighs ]

La-la-la-la

What do I care about? Uh?

Programming is cool and...

I like my friends, and, um...

onions, and...

the first three bites of pancakes, and...

Oh, I like getting new textbooks at the beginning of the year

before I'm sick of school again, and road trips, and...

Huh. Road trips.

Heh. Huh?

What?! Oh!

That's embarrassing, let me pick a different one.

[ "Word Up" by Cameo playing ]

That doesn't make sense!

Doesn't seem to matter if it makes sense.

I can't believe this is happening.

It's the music of your heart.

But it isn't emotional at all.

It's just some song my family used to sing on road trips.

It's about dancing or something.

-Gross. -Don't listen to him.

Just sing.

[ Groans ]

Yo, pretty ladies, around the world

Got a weird thing to show you

So tell all the boys and girls

Tell your brother, your sister

And your mama, too

Your heart is fun, Miss Tulip! 'Cause they're about to throw down

And you'll know just what to do

Wave your hands in the air like you don't care

Glide by the people as they stop to look and stare

Do your dance, do your dance

Do your dance, quick, Mama

Come on, baby, tell me what's the word

A-word up!

[ Thud ] -Huh?

[ Stomping ]

Uh...

[ Clinks ]

Ah, oh.

[ Door unlocks ] -Whoa!

Huh.