Original subtitles

[Vernon] In the Amish world,

we abstain from electricity, we abstain from cars.

[woman] We don't wear makeup or jewelry.

[Allen] We work the fields, we go to church.

[Vernon speaking foreign language]

[in English] Our youth are leaving in record numbers.

[James] Dating in the community is hard.

If I look around, I'm related, I'm related.

[Vernon] Our population is shrinking.

So I will be inviting people in from the outside

in hopes of repopulating the church.

[Kendra] Modern life is exhausting.

Having a chance to live a simpler life like the Amish...

hell yeah.

I want to be Amish 'cause I love that lifestyle,

I love the traditional sense.

[Judah] I don't like that I wake up,

the first thing I do is get on Instagram.

I feel like it would be better for me, like, spiritually to become Amish.

I ain't never seen no cornfield up in person.

You'll need to integrate into the Amish community.

In our Amish house, there is no electricity, no AC.

This is our outhouse.

[Billie Jo] You've got to be lying.

[Esmeralda] Women do the laundry.

Oh, no. Ew.

[Sarah speaking]

-[Billie Jo] Oh, like period pads? -[Sarah] Yes.

[sighs] Oh, my gosh.

We left a completely different world.

This is a huge culture shock to me.

They're not gonna make it.

[Kendra] Real change only happens

when you're willing to get out of your comfort zone.

I'm so used to living a certain way

that I'm coming here and it's completely different.

You don't feel like you owe all of us an apology for how you both acted?

[Esmeralda] Giving, like, mean girl energy

like, a gaslighting situation.

-[sniffles] -Wait. What?

-Are you kidding me right now? -[squeals]

I just felt the need just to yell it out!

[James] I'm escorting you off the property. Go!

They're going to want to go back to their easy life.

Do we or don't we accept these applicants to continue finding their way here?

My life completely changes after today.

[Kendra sobbing]

[Vernon] You are willing to conform,

you are willing to submit.

[sobbing]

[congregation singing] ♪ Amazing grace ♪

♪ How sweet the sound ♪

♪ That saved a wretch ♪

♪ Like me ♪

My name is Vernon Coblentz,

and I am the bishop of this community.

Primarily, bishops make the rules.

In the Amish way of saying it, it's called Ordnung.

If you're disrespectful to theOrdnung of your own church,

that's just a no-no.

To be Amish is like a culture, faith and lifestyle all in one.

We have our own language,

which is a German dialect.

[speaking foreign language]

[in English] In the Amish world,

we abstain from electricity and from cars.

Amish means no tattoos.

Amish means no jewelry and definitely no makeup.

Your clothes are homemade.

Men will always wear hats.

Women will always wear coverings.

This simplicity,

along with our need to keep technology out of our community,

allows us to draw closer to God

and the nature around us.

[Emma] ♪ Thank you for the valley ♪

♪ I walk through today ♪

♪ The darker the valley ♪

♪ The more I learn to pray ♪

♪ I found you where the lilies Were blowing by the way ♪

I love that I got to grow up Amish.

I love to hang out outdoors and just live off of the land.

It's so peaceful.

It's like heaven on earth.

[John speaking]

Hey!

This is my cousin John.

For us Amish, community is everything.

If somebody comes and asks for help,

like, we'll just go help them, you know.

We'll come together whatever the project is.

Everybody raises produce during the summer.

This is what they do for a living.

[gasps] Strawberries!

I'm glad I grew up Amish,

but I'm just really concerned

the world that I love will disappear.

I got some duck [bleep] on my finger now. Gross.

You don't know what duck [bleep] smells like?

I guess you didn't grow up on a farm.

[laughing]

I got you there.

I want to show you a couple of stuff

that I have hidden away here.

Of course, you're not allowed to see this ever.

Like, you tell the bishop, you will have me on your ass.

I keep getting into trouble.

Like, I am the "black sheep" of the community.

This is probably my favorite.

Chambord.

Oh, that's good.

Actually, I'm thirsty right now.

I realize I broke the rules,

but I still take my culture and community very seriously.

I do not have a good standing in my community right now.

I am shunned.

Being shunned is kind of considered

the ultimate punishment.

I was shunned for owning and using a cell phone.

As a shunned person, you'll feel like an outcast,

like an outsider, kind of outside looking in.

You can't partake in Communion.

You can't eat with your family.

You can't do business with them.

There's a lot of shame involved in being shunned.

You no longer feel like you're part of the community,

which is your whole identity because you grew up in it.

It is the whole goal of shunning

is to make somebody feel bad about themselves.

I moved to Lancaster

because I'm hoping to start a new life.

I love being Amish,

but dating in my community is a little different

than where you guys do dating. [laughs]

For one, I am related to almost everybody.

I go to the youth group, I look around...

I'm related, I'm related. [laughs]

Third cousin once removed.

[Emma] Lot of Amish communities,

they populate so fast.

It only takes 15 years,

and they look around and they're, like,

"Everybody's related."

So youth end up leaving the Amish

because they have no options.

There are some communities that are very inbred.

It's just like that you work with cattle, right?

I know that I can't take brothers and sisters and cousins

and breed them to each other

and expect to have a good calf.

That's just not the way it works.

[Vernon] Not having new people in a community

sadly causes infants to be born with mental and physical challenges.

But another reason people are leaving our community

is simply because of the technology.

It's hard to keep it out.

And it changes the young people.

[music playing on earphones]

My plan to fix this is an unconventional one.

I will be inviting English people into our community

in hopes of repopulating the church.

As Amish, we're forbidden to use smartphones and computers.

So I've asked an English friend

to be the go-between

to spread the word about this opportunity.

I realize not all my brothers would agree

with integrating people from the outside,

mostly because they're afraid of sin and temptation

coming into our Amish circles.

This is not something I can do on my own.

[James] The bishop approached me and asked me

if I would help take care of the English

that wanted to actually join the Amish,

and I agreed to it.

[Vernon] By helping me,

I'm offering James a chance at redemption.

I'm going to have to have a woman help...

So I'll have my cousin Emma help me.

It is a risky endeavor for all of us,

and there's always the chance that these English might destroy the community.

They could cause enough disharmony to the point

it topples the church.

[Emma singing]

[Vernon] I believe that God would be pleased

to open the doors and embrace new people in the community.

Bringing people in from the outside is always a risk.

It can be a good thing, and it can be a disaster.

♪ He'll carry you through ♪

My name is Kendra Bates.

I'm 32 years old and I am from Milwaukee, Wisconsin,

living in Los Angeles, California.

LA is so dirty and it's stinky,

and there's literally poop everywhere.

People are always yelling.

And if you're walking past someone on the sidewalk, no one says hi.

No one says, "How are you doing?"

I feel like when I first moved here,

I was just trying to get to know people

and having that, like, Wisconsin mindset, I went to a party

and this girl literally told me she could not be friends with me

'cause I didn't have enough followers.

[hip-hop music playing]

I am a dancer.

I'm constantly trying to train,

constantly trying to network,

meet new people, go to auditions.

A lot of people misunderstand my appearance versus my personality.

My faith is really important.

[people cheering]

Me getting baptized was the hugest thing.

Like, I've completely given myself to Christ.

And then that's where I get scrutinized is because people are like,

"Well, you say you're a Christian,

but then you're posting all of this, like,

sexy stuff on your Instagram."

Guys see my Instagram

and they automatically think I'm a hookup girl.

And so, it's like this weird, like, counterbalance.

Before I got baptized,

I was, like, at the lowest point,

and I did decide to do OnlyFans,

and at that time, I was like, "I don't care.

"Like, I really don't care who sees me."

And it stemmed from me

really not having any love for myself.

I really, like...

Sorry, um...

I really did, like, hate myself so much.

And I felt so dirty about myself.

And, like, I just, I wasn't respecting myself.

I was giving myself to other men

who, like, really did not respect me.

I don't know, you just feel so gross about yourself.

Even though it's been five years since I've done it,

even though I go to church,

even though I, like, barely drink,

I don't sleep with people,

like, I live a completely different lifestyle, like,

forgiving myself for that is the hardest thing.

I feel like there's something more that I want to be living for,

something more that I want to be doing.

I first found out about this opportunity on social media.

I was like a chance to live with the Amish? Like, "Absolutely."

I actually fell for an Amish boy in the past.

Basically, my friend grew up next to an Amish community and she was like,

"Hey, they're all in..." Rahmspringer?

Is it Rahmspringer or Rumspringa or something like that.

And she was like, "They're having a party. You wanna go?"

And I was like, "With Amish? Yes."

And I saw a boy across the way who was Amish,

and I thought he was the cutest thing I've ever seen.

And when I left, I was like, "I'm in love."

I was, like, "I want to be with him."

But unfortunately, he was, like, very tied into his Amish roots.

And so we just, like, couldn't keep it going.

I feel like God is giving me this opportunity

to become Amish.

Being in a community that is more pure and God-centered,

I'm hoping it'll help, like, release the pain

and the image that I view of myself.

I'm Judah. I'm 22 years old.

Growing up, we didn't have much, for real.

Money was tight. We had to boil water to get hot water.

People died every single day. My best friend died,

you know, from a senseless act of violence.

It's hard out here.

We don't even call it Kansas City.

It's really called Killer City.

I've always been ridiculed for who I was

as far as the way I dress, the way I act,

caring about my appearance.

I like to get a haircut pretty much every two weeks.

Manicure, pedicure at least once a month.

I've never really felt, like, a sense of belonging in our community, for real.

In the Black community, where I grew up, at least,

a lot of that stuff, like, depression and anxiety,

it's like, "Oh, boy, you don't got that."

Like, you just...

We don't really talk about mental health, for real, in my community.

Recently, I've been thinking about how it is to live off the grid,

like, really connect with nature.

And then, the next day I seen this posting

of people looking for people to join the Amish community,

and I started to enquire about it.

But I felt like it was God, because at that point,

I'd never heard of the Amish community.

I didn't know what they was or who they were.

And so after that, I started doing my research

and looking into it,

and I just felt like it was just, like, "Ah!" a moment.

It's me and Mom.

Okay.

A whale.

[laughter]

My mama knows my fascination with the Amish community

and how I want to slow things down.

And now that I'm actually about to do it,

and have the conversation with her,

I'm a little nervous

because I know she's gonna be caught off guard.

I have a few different phobias.

She knows I don't like to do the farm stuff.

So I don't know how it's gonna go.

I know she thinks I'm crazy.

I hope the Amish don't play like y'all 'cause y'all be cheating.

Basically, I'm gonna be going to the Amish community for some time.

I'm sick.

Literally nauseous, my stomach. [chuckles]

The little that I know about the Amish

is they live off the grid.

Off the grid means bugs, I'm sure farms,

and some other things that Judah is just not accustomed to.

You just can't say, "I'm going to be Amish."

You don't just say it like that to your family.

-It's a way to tell us... -Introduce.

Yeah, to introduce it,

and then you need to know 'cause you are Muslim.

So are you okay? Who are you living with? Who are you going with?

Like, those are the questions that I have.

And are you gonna be okay?

[Judah] Everything I've been through

I feel like is leading me up to this moment.

All roads right now is leading to the Amish lifestyle.

I feel like it'll be better for me, like, spiritually.

I got to ask the hard question.

I'm not being racist,

but are there Black Amish people?

Because I don't know.

I'm doing things that my heart feels.

I feel like God has blessed me with a good discernment

to realize where I need to go, where I shouldn't go.

I don't know how many Black people are gonna be there with me.

I don't know if they're gonna accept, like, me and my lifestyle,

the things that I do,

so I'm a little nervous about that.

There's something about me that the Amish might accept

or they might not.

They're either gonna accept me and work with me,

or they're gonna throw me away.

[Vernon] God has chosen the six outsiders

that he wants in our community,

and he's chosen me to watch over them

to see that they're properly integrated

into the community,

Which is why I have to be careful

who I choose to help the English.

And for this reason, I've chosen my brother, Allen, and his wife, Sarah.

They have adopted children from the English world,

and they have learned not to fall prey to temptation.

I've also asked James.

James is already shunned from his community.

I believe he is highly motivated to be unshunned,

therefore he will be on his best behavior in my community.

-Have a seat. -[Allen] Thank you.

[all speaking foreign language]

[James] Mm-hmm.

[Allen] Mm-hmm.

[in English] The bishop and his brother Allen

are from a more liberal church.

I figured it would be easier to become unshunned here

in the Lancaster community than my own,

which is more strict.

What is it that makes you good candidates for people coming in?

Well, obviously,

we've fostered several children.

[speaking foreign language]

[Vernon] Mm.

[in English] We have four adopted children...

and our youngest son passed away in November of last year.

He was out late one night and had an accident,

and he didn't make it.

[Vernon speaking foreign language]

[Allen in English] I want to help my brother

bring in new people into the community.

I think it will be a benefit to the community

and give somebody an opportunity

to live a more simple life.

We all have a void that needs to be filled.

[Vernon] My plan is to give them one month to prove themselves,

which means your job is to prepare them

for the day of reckoning.

At the end of the month,

we will have a day of reckoning

to see how well they have integrated into the community

and whether they can continue pursuing membership.

It will be your jobs to integrate them, to teach them,

to disciple them, to embrace the Amish life.

[James] I have seen plenty of people from society

try to join the Amish Church.

Once they see how tough it actually is and actually experience it,

it's way harder than they think.

I don't expect these English to last more than a couple days.

They're going to want to go back to their easy life.

My name is Esmeralda Podaka. I am 27.

I think I do put a lot of pride in the way I look and I present myself

just 'cause I always grew up that way.

My mom will not leave the house without makeup on.

My mom's the one that raised me.

She always worked full time to, you know, support me.

I grew up in El Paso, so it's like a border city.

Very Mexican culture. Spanish Catholic.

Since I didn't grow up with, like, siblings

and, you know, it was just me and my mom,

I didn't have that, like, traditional Mexican family, I feel like, growing up.

I was very much, you know, an only child, basically, and kind of grew up alone.

So I never got that big sense of family around me.

My dad wasn't around,

so we aren't really close at all.

It just felt alone,

and it felt like I wanted someone to be there for me

and, like, I don't know, just have that, like, role of just a man in the house.

I want to be Amish 'cause I love that lifestyle.

I love the traditional sense of, you know,

they're really strict about divorce

and, you know, the way that they are very traditional in the marriages.

I love the man providing,

I like the woman taking care of the house, taking care of the kids.

Like, I love traditional roles.

Even though I didn't grow up like that,

I feel like that's always something I wanted for myself.

I'm not like someone that's, like, super, like, career-driven

and, like, wants to work and be like a girl boss.

That's just, like, not ever something I wanted.

Like, the Amish way of doing things,

it kind of just makes more sense to me.

I don't have to, you know, have to find out what I have to wear for tomorrow

and have to go out and buy a freaking outfit for every single thing.

I'm always weighing myself.

Like, that's, like, the first thing that,

like, I wake up in the morning and I weigh myself.

I, like, go to the bathroom, like, weigh myself.

I'm constantly comparing myself to other people.

So I feel like maybe going into Amish culture,

like, everyone kind of looks the same,

so I feel like it might make me feel less pressured to care about my appearance.

That's why I really think I need to go Amish.

I feel like it'll kind of give me that sense of

being part of something bigger than me.

But, my God, I'm nervous, I'm ready,

but I don't know if I can really do this.

I am Aaron Noble. I am 42 years old.

In my life, I try to really fit in,

to be like everybody else.

That's a lot of pressure. That's exhausting.

But my spirituality and integrity

will always be what I pursue.

I've not really dated a lot of people.

I've just never really been interested.

When I was 11, I went to a little conference.

Speaker's like, "Yeah, save yourself for marriage."

But when I was growing up,

I felt this overwhelming pressure from the whole world doing it.

And then...

I lost my virginity at 32.

Unfortunately,

it was kind of a forced situation on her behalf.

So, yeah.

Correct.

I kept my virginity

because I wanted to wait till I got married.

You know, I wanted that to be really sacred.

My dad was a pastor and an evangelist.

My dad was very good friends with the Amish people,

and I think that that's what intrigued me

in the first place with the culture.

He one day just gave one a ride,

and then his name got around,

and so he became an Amish driver from there.

That is really where my relationships with the Amish came.

I'm really excited coming in.

If I'm accepted into the community, I'll feel like I have peace.

And I'll feel like I have a place where I belong.

I mean, I understand why you want to join that environment

and that kind of lifestyle.

-But it is a sacrifice. -[Aaron] Yeah.

And they do it because they feel like

it will keep them from being tempted

to go into the things of the world.

But it's really hard.

To be honest, I have a disability,

and I hope that the Amish are willing to be understanding.

I think that unless I take that risk

and take that journey for myself,

that I'm never gonna know.

Currently boarding.

[Judah] Oh, my gosh, this is crazy.

[Vernon speaking German]

♪ Baby, I'm a beast I'm a monster ♪

♪ I always do it proper ♪

♪ Make sure you keep me On the roster ♪

♪ I'm the only one of me ♪

♪ Everybody else imposter ♪

♪ A beast, I'm a monster I always do it proper ♪

I ain't never seen no cornfield up in person.

-[driver speaking] -Yeah, I've never.

Like, I've never done anything like this.

I want to be able to get more immersed in nature

and learn more skills.

Like, to even be able to communicate with a horse.

Like, that's just so dope within itself.

[Judah] I think it's such a beautiful thing.

I guess this is my stop.

-Okay. -Thank you for the ride.

-I appreciate you. -You're welcome.

Oh, my gosh.

I cannot believe I'm here right now.

-[Kendra laughing] Hey! -[Judah] What's up!

How are you?

-Kendra. -Kendra. I'm Judah.

-Nice to meet you. -Judah? Nice to meet you.

-Oh, my God. -You smell good.

Not for long.

I feel like we're about to get real stank up in here.

[Judah] Hi.

-[Billie Jo] Hi. -I'm Kendra.

Hi, Kendra. I'm Billie Jo.

-Billie Jo! Nice to meet you. -It's so nice to meet you.

[Billie Jo] Oh, how exciting.

[Kendra] Are you Amish?

-Already? -I wanna be.

I've been obsessed for a very long time.

Yeah.

♪ When I was Just a little girl ♪

♪ My momma lent me a bunch of sunshine ♪

My name is Billie Jo Hefferin, I'm 46 years old,

and I live in Berkshire, New York.

Hi there. How are you?

I discovered that I wanted to be Amish probably 20 years ago

when I rode on a horse and buggy for the first time.

So the more I learn,

the more I really want to be Amish.

I have been dressing Amish for over ten years.

Now, Billie Jo, you said that you did not grow up Amish.

Do you think they have a problem with you wearing Amish clothes?

Do you think that's offensive to them?

I don't think of it like that.

I think, if anything, I respect their clothing.

Because of my love for the Amish,

I collect so many things and I put them in this room.

I have a collection of dolls.

None of the dolls have faces.

A true Amish doll should never have faces.

You love getting your bonnet on and matching Mommy.

That is such a good girl.

But let's get this part on too.

I'm so proud. You look so pretty.

I think I'm longing for a more peaceful life,

another era, another time.

People call me a poser for dressing this way.

So now it's time for me to walk that walk.

Brixton's bougie.

And I'm Amish.

I've gone by BJ too.

-[Kendra] BJ? -Yeah.

[Kendra] It's all good. My last name is Bates,

so people called me Master Bates and, like, at school.

And I was so, like, pure. So I was like, "What is that?"

And then I, like, figured out what it was.

Kendra had her, uh, chachis out and proud,

which I was kind of cringing for her.

Of all the things that you could wear

to go and live the Amish life,

you chose, like, the kind of smutty cheerleader dress.

Oh, wait, there's another person.

What's up?

-How are you? -What's your name?

-Matt. -Judah.

-Nice to meet you. -I'm Kendra.

-Hi. Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you.

Are you from Texas?

-I am from Texas. -See, I knew it.

[Kendra] My first impression of Matt is he's cute.

I'm just, like, "Sir."

That is my type to a T. Like, "Sir."[laughs]

Very cute.

My name is Matthew Martin. I am 35 years old.

I grew up doing rodeo.

My dad is a world champion calf roper.

Rodeo wasn't really my thing.

It was my dad's thing.

So I, at some point,

started doing what I wanted to do.

I'm the father of twin boys from my previous marriage.

They are seven years old,

and they're the coolest kids around, so.

But I am nowhere

where I thought I would be in life at 35.

I thought I'd feel more settled and grounded in life than I do.

I feel lost.

But I don't think everything's[bleep] until you're dead.

I think there's always a chance to fix things

and course correct your life.

I'm in this big kind of transitional thing in my life

where I'm trying to figure everything out,

and I've always been interested in the Amish community,

and I saw this opportunity.

I feel like the modern world is really fast paced.

I want a simpler life for me and my kids.

Hopefully, the Amish community

is that lifestyle I'm looking for.

What's up?

-Hi! -[Esmeralda laughs]

Oh, my God, this is such a struggle.

I'm gonna go help her.

[Esmeralda] Hi. Nice to meet you. Esmeralda.

[Judah] What up?

I'm Aaron.

I'm Kendra. I'm a hugger.

-Sorry. Nice to meet you. -Okay, what's up, hugger?

-Hi. Esmeralda. -Aaron.

-Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you all.

[Vernon] Gather round.

[Billie Jo] By the way the bishop's looking at us,

I can tell that he's so disappointed.

So, a couple do's and don'ts

before we're dispersing you into the community.

You'll need to integrate into the spiritual aspect of the Amish community,

mimic the culture

in dress, in actions, in your talk, et cetera.

The Amish community is built on trust.

If you break that trust,

it takes a while to rebuild that.

You're just outsiders. You're coming in.

You need to earn that trust.

And Kendra, would you step inside,

and I'd like to ask you several questions.

[laughing] I don't even know what's happening right now.

Hi.

-Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you. Welcome.

Ooh, Bishop Vernon, dark and scary.

Um... [chuckles]

[Vernon] You can have a seat.

[Kendra] I'm looking at him in the barn.

Like, death stare, I felt. I felt it was a little dark.

I'm like, "What are we about to get into?"

And so, what is the motivator

that causes you to dress the way you dress?

Uh...

[Vernon] Seeing Kendra's dress was alarming to me.

I don't know why someone would dress that way

to coming to the Amish community.

-I'm a dancer. -Okay.

And we book our jobs based off of our body.

-Yup. Mm-hmm. -Like, when we go to auditions,

it's literally all skin, like, bra and small shorts.

The Amish would see it as lust.

Lust would be the issue with the immodest dress

or skin showing,

and we would see that

as evidence of a lack of something.

In other words, I don't want to see a display of your body.

We would take scripture to be just written in stone.

-It's just the way it is. -Yeah.

It's good for a man not to touch a woman.

We would take that literally.

Our wives would kick you out of the house

because they're not going to accept any competition

from any female for their husband's affection.

Our wives are very, very jealous about our affection.

My wife would be very, very jealous

of not just my purity, but her son's purity.

Oh.

-Very, very jealous about, what is their son seeing? -Yeah.

My wife might say,

"Nathan, I don't think I want you to look at that girl

as a potential suitor, as a potential partner.

"Her heart's not in the right place."

I hope you find what you're looking for.

[Billie Jo gasps and whispers]

[Judah] Kendra.

[sobs] I, like, want to cry right now.

[sniffles]

Oh, okay. Sorry.

-[Judah] No! -[Aaron] Uh-oh.

I wasn't expecting it to be that hard.

Um...

-I'm sorry. -Can I hug you, honey-bunches?

I'm so sorry.

-It's okay. -[sniffles]

Like, I've had to deal with, like, slut-shaming my whole life,

and, like...

like, I don't know, I feel like I don't act like a ho,

like, not anymore, you know what I mean?

But like, the first thing he talks about is like,

you know, what are you wearing?

And then, like, asking me, like, why I dress this way.

And it's just, like, hard

'cause him talking about, like, you know,

you would never be, like, accepted.

Like, you couldn't even stay with us

'cause my wife wouldn't want you around.

I wouldn't have, like, my son want you.

And I'm just like,

I've heard this my whole life and I'm like,

"This is what I'm trying to get away from."

I do feel judged

because I hate, like, having the conversations about my past.

I hate getting that reaction.

I hate, like, having to constantly defend myself.

Jesus, actually... didn't He help a prostitute?

So why wouldn't He help you?

This girl is in tears,

and I think you just called her a prostitute.

"Welcome to the group. We love prostitutes."

I feel like I'm gonna have a really hard time here.

Yeah.

[Vernon] We're gonna gather this way.

Oh. Are we taking our bags?

[Vernon] So sending you off

into the homes you'll be staying in.

So Aaron, Judah and Esmeralda, you will be with the Troyers.

They are two blocks that way.

The other group is Matt, Billie Jo and Kendra,

and you will be with the Coblentzes,

and you will be just around the corner from the Troyers

in the other direction.

[Kendra] I don't even know what I'm getting into.

Even though I felt like he slut-shamed me

and judged me pretty harshly,

this is what I want, and so I'm not leaving.

[Esmeralda] I'm nervous after seeing Kendra come out

and, you know, have that emotional response.

It's gonna be a challenge for me,

and it is gonna be different.

[Vernon] You're excused.

[Judah] All right. I'll see you guys.

[Aaron] Kendra was sobbing,

but she's wearing a sweater dress with cleavage and everything.

And it's just like, why?

Like, you're literally trying to be Amish.

[Billie Jo] I am a little shook.

Yeah, that was definitely intimidating for sure.

It was a wake-up call.

[Matt grunts]

I got it.

[Kendra] Do they have doorbells?

[Billie Jo] I guess we'll find out.

Oh, God, I see them. Oh, my God.

Obviously, how I dress is not how they dress.

I'm nervous they're gonna think I'm a ho.

And I know first impressions are a big thing.

-What if they don't let me in the house? -[laughs]

-[Billie Jo] We'll make them. -Yeah.

I'm like, actually, afraid they're gonna be like,

"You two can stay. You sleep in the barn."

Oh, [bleep].

-Hello. -Hi.

-How are you? -Good. How about you?

-I'm Billie Jo. -I'm Allen.

Allen. Nice to meet you.

Hi, I'm Kendra.

-Hi, I'm Matt. -Matt.

-Nice to meet you. -[Billie Jo] Hi.

My first impression of Kendra,

seeing the clothes that she was wearing

was like, "Well, wait a minute. She can't be serious."

Come on in, and we will get further acquainted.

Here we go. It's a whole new world.

[James] Me and Emma are sitting there looking at these worldly people.

Dressed that way,

are they trying to join the Amish, actually, really?

-[Judah] Hello there. -Hello. How are you guys?

We've been looking forward to seeing you guys.

-I'm Aaron. -James. Pleasure to meet you.

-Nice to meet you. Aaron. -Emma.

Hi. Esmeralda. Nice to meet you.

-Hi. -Hi. Esmeralda.

-I'm Judah. -Okay.

-Pleasure to meet you. James. -Nice to meet you, too, James.

We come bearing gifts.

I'm not sure if you like root beer, but...

-Thank you. -You're welcome.

So we'll be leaving all the worldly possessions on the porch, please.

[Judah] Okay.

That way we're not contaminating the house with worldly things.

Welcome, welcome.

Did you guys want water?

[Judah] I'm okay. Thank you, though.

-Okay. Water? -Sure, I'll get some water.

-Water? -Yeah. I'll take one, please.

-All right. -Thank you.

[Judah] James and Emma,

I'm guessing they are husband and wife.

I'm walking in the house

and they're offering me a glass of water

out of, like, a mason jar,

and I'm like, perhaps not.

Let's keep it to bottles.

[Esmeralda] Walking in, you know, there is a flytrap.

Just everything looks so old and dusty.

[Judah] The house ain't got no furniture.

Where y'all couch? Where is y'all oven?

Like, where is y'all stove? Where is...

I can't even sit down. They got wooden chairs.

I'm like, I'm from the ghetto,

but this is a little too ghetto for me.

Y'all ain't hot?

-It's warm. It's warm. -I'm a little warm.

-[Emma] There's no AC. -No AC?

-[Emma] Yeah. -Wow.

I don't think I have any regrets being here yet,

but I feel like,

there's no AC, it's hot as[bleep],

and I'm not as excited as I was before. [chuckles]

[Kendra] I don't think you can carry both of them.

[Sarah] I can take one of them.

[Allen] You're over here.

They're bouncy.

[Billie Jo] Allen, I have to go to the bathroom.

I will take, like, a pig trough.

When you have to poop, you have to poop.

There's no waiting.

I have to go, and I have to go now.

Okay, so this is our restroom, outhouse.

Oh, no.

You've got to be lying, Allen.

I'm not a lion.

Um, these newspapers,

we can pick 'em up free at the gas stations.

They're old ones.

So we use this instead of toilet paper.

[Billie Jo] Oh, my goodness.

I guess what's a daily routine for us Amish

is kind of challenging for the English people.

It may be a hard knock to reality, I don't know.

-Oh, my goodness. -[Allen clears throat]

I don't know how sanitary this is, honestly.

[Allen] There's lids on there, so you just pick up the lid.

[Billie Jo] All right, all right, I gotta go,

and this is just bad, so let's get it done.

Oh, my gosh.

How bad do I really want this?

[sighs]

Oh, my God.

I should have asked is the square number one and the circle number two

or doesn't it matter?

[Allen] It doesn't matter.

I probably shouldn't have sat on the square one.

I think I have a pretty bad splinter.

I'm gonna see if Kendra will help me with that.

[Billie Jo exhales]

I'm obviously here to to help them experience our way of living,

the Amish way of living and a simple, simple life.

But I definitely didn't expect to show them how to use a toilet.

[James] Okay, Judah. Are you ready?

[Esmeralda chuckles]

[James] Okay.

[Esmeralda] Good luck.

[James] We're going through their bags

to make sure they're not trying to sneak in

some worldly things into our house.

We can't have them corrupt the Amish.

All right, the pants, already no. They are ripped.

Oh, no ripped jeans in the Amish?

[James] No.

[Emma] We're looking for phones.

There's things like bright colored clothing.

If you're Amish,

the dress code just goes with it.

It's part of the religion, really.

This is kind of flashy, right?

-[Judah] It's dark. -No. I'm not hanging that on my laundry line.

If someone was to see Judah's flashy clothes on my clothesline,

it would probably start rumors.

People would wonder why.

It's literally your reputation on the line.

I think James low-key liked my boots.

If they had the chance, they would wear these boots.

-Aaron, are you ready? -I'm ready.

Is that where all the goodies are?

-That's where the goodies aren't. -Okay.

[sighs] Where are the juicy goods?

It's a tell-tale sign.

That bad boy, I got to figure it out, is for my hearing aids.

People see fun-loving Aaron, but I do have a secret.

I have a hearing disability.

The first time that I really recognized it was in sixth grade.

I came down with the flu

and had my left ear perforated.

It's just one of those things where it's gotten worse,

and I just feel like it's just continued as I'm getting older.

When I don't have my hearing aids in,

it's kind of like being underwater.

A lot of things are muffled.

It's emotionally and it's physically draining.

I'm just concerned that you have a device somewhere

-you're going to slip in and try to charge with it. -I do.

My phone is actually connected to the hearing aids.

And so, without the device,

the hearing aids are Bluetooth,

-they don't work. -Okay.

You're connecting it to your phone.

[Aaron] They go hand in hand.

You're going to have a hard time finding a community anywhere

that will allow you to continue using your phone.

The Amish believe in medical devices if needed.

He can have hearing aids, but not some that are connected to a phone.

Of all the things Aaron has,

having his phone is probably the worst one.

I mean, there's temptation.

I don't know why he even wants to be Amish

if he wants to keep his phone.

Your phone, let's put it in the box...

and see if we can find you

some other hearing aids fairly quick.

Listen, I can't let you have access to your phone.

[Aaron] What James doesn't get

is that if he takes my hearing aids away,

that messes with my head,

so I can't be present and I can't be in the moment

if I don't have them.

[Judah] Anything you're worried about them finding?

[Esmeralda] I don't know. Maybe.

I don't know what's allowed or not.

[laughing]

[Emma] Do you have any lotion in here?

Oh, no, no. But yeah, this is all lotion.

Like, lotion. Skincare.

-That looks like makeup. -No, I swear it's not.

It's, like, for your eyes.

[Emma] We wouldn't use makeup,

so we kind of expect them to do the same.

You do see people get so wrapped up in their self-image

that they get Botox shots

enough to the point they look a little bit like fish.

I see you're wearing fake nails and eyelashes.

[Emma] We have a rule that we're not allowed to have the lashes and the nails.

That's not how the Amish culture does.

We'll have to take it.

[Esmeralda] No.

Looks like we have a situation here.

We can't have these English defying our rules on day one.

I mean, they are here to fit in.

So I am left with no choice

except to bring Sarah and Allen in

to see if they can work with Esmeralda.

[Allen] If you want to milk a cow,

you're gonna have to take those off your nails.

Well, then, I guess I won't be milking any cows.

You wanted to join the Amish culture,

but yet you don't want to give up your nails and eyelashes.

[Esmeralda] No.

You already took our makeup. You already took our clothes.

You're just, like, yanking everything from us at once,

and it's, like, so hard to, like, just deal with everything.

I already feel like not secure in myself already.

Growing up, like, my mom, she also grew up like that.

Like she's always ready.

She doesn't go, like, anywhere without makeup,

so I feel like I just grew up, like, thinking, like,

that's the only way, um, I guess, to feel pretty.

I don't know.

We want you to be able to feel secure in how God made you.

Our rules and guidelines

is not to use jewelry or makeup

or anything to make us stand out and look prettier

to catch attention.

I was kind of astounded with Esmeralda.

If you're going into some place,

you have no right to ask them to conform to your way of thinking.

You want to fit in or not?

It's, like, the last thing that I'm kind of allowed to have,

so I think I'm just gonna stand on, like, I'm not.

I'm not doing it.

If the lashes are that big of a deal, then I don't know,

maybe it's just not gonna work out. Yeah.

[James] You're leaving tonight?

Maybe.

[James] Esmeralda is fighting me

like a spoiled little brat over eyelashes.

She's definitely not cut out to be Amish.

[Esmeralda] I'm done. I don't want to do this anymore.

[James] Then, just leave already.

Okay.

[Judah] This season on Suddenly Amish...

[Vernon] They're trying to integrate into our world.

This is my saw virginity.

This might be harder than I expected.

-[pigs squealing] -[bleep] It's out! No!

Wow, look at that nice Amish farmer we got here.

I think there's something going on with Kendra and Matt.

If the opportunity presents itself, maybe.

-Are you Billie Jo? -I am.

[laughing] No! Oh, wow, you really do.

Welcome to the Amish.

[Vernon] Luke, chapter four.

He has been sent to heal the brokenhearted.

[sobbing]

There's just so much judgment and what you can and can't do.

-[Emma speaking] -Uh, ow.

I'm really struggling.

I feel like I'm losing every part of me.

[Judah] I'm gonna just keep my little secrets to myself.

It was more [bleep] drama.

How do you sleep at night?

I don't give a [bleep] if the cameras are watching me.

[James] I am escorting you off the property.

He's chasing me with a [bleep] ax.

[James] Go!

[Judah] I feel like James is playing a cold game right now.

I don't know what he got up his sleeve.

[James] Kendra, I don't want you to run off on us.

This life is not for everyone.

None of it makes sense.

What the [bleep] am I doing here?

[Judah] Harley, wait!

I'm braking!

It is our responsibility

to teach them what's right and what's wrong.

[thunder rumbling]

Joining the Amish, it's a decision for life.

[James] Do you want the Amish life or not?