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Belly up, belly up to the bar, boys Better loosen your belts

Only drink when you're all alone Or with somebody else

Belly up, belly up to the bar, boys Let your money be seen

Only drink by day or night Or somewheres in between

Belly up, belly up to the bar, boys While the weather is clear

If it isn't rain and rain you'll know It's rainin' ale and beer

Belly up, belly up to the bar, boys If it isn't your day

A quart and pint mixed up just right

Will cure you right away

Away

Away

Come in and sit a while, Murphy.

We'll open the jug and toss a few. Bring in the feed, Mol.

Jam, Joe, get her! Get her, Jam!

Jam, don't let her get away. Get her!

Joe, come on!

There she goes.

Don't let her get away!

You're not gonna get me!

Here we go!

Never! Never! Never!

Let me go! Get off of me!

Holler uncle!

Molly, holler uncle!

I ain't never hollering uncle to you or nobody! I ain't never down.

And even if I was, you'd sure never hear it from me.

Holler uncle, Molly!

You're tuckered. Why don't you quit?

Sure, I'm tuckered.

And I might give out, but I won't give in.

How could anybody say I'm down? Look, I'm blinking.

And I'm also thinking how to break through. Maybe here!

Maybe here!

Maybe no place, but there'll come a time...

...because nothing nor nobody wants me down like I wants me up!

Up where the people are. Up where the talking is.

Up where the joke's going on.

Now, look here. I am important to me.

I ain't no bottom to no pile.

I mean much more to me than I mean to anybody I ever knew!

Certainly more than any siwash yazzyhampers like you guys.

Go ahead, break my arm.

Me say uncle? Ha!

Doesn't make a difference for you to tell me I'm down...

...till I say so too.

Ever try stepping on a chigger bug? Well, there's one now! Jump him!

You thinking you got him? You thinking he's quick?

He don't think so. There he goes!

And you can be positive sure...

...I'm as good as any chigger bug ever lived!

I hate that word "down."

But I love the word "up"...

...because "up" means hope.

And that's just what I got. Hope...

...for someplace better, someplace, I don't know...

...that's cleaner and shinier and...

Hell, if I gotta eat catfish heads all my life...

...can't I have them off a plate once?

In a red silk dress.

When there's girl enough on me

To wear one

And then someday

With all my might and all my main

I'm gonna learn to read and write

I'm gonna see what there is to see

So if you go from nowhere On the road to somewhere

And you meet anyone you know It's me

I'm gonna move from place to place

And find a house with a golden stair

And if that house is red

And has a big brass bed

I'm livin' there

Well, now.

Who do you think you are?

I could be anybody. Even a queen if I wanted to be.

We'd just been wrestlin' With a queen, if you please

Who'd recognize her With all that dirt on her knees

And with her mophead And all them toes

And that contraption She calls her nose

A queen can never be queen Without any throne

So here's the fanciest throne That you'll ever own

Here is your scepter Here is your crown

Now won't you please sit down

Howdy there, partner.

Look at me! I'm a bird! I can fly!

To show that you know

You gotta show you know You know

I'm gonna learn to read and write

I'm gonna see what there is to see

So if you go from nowhere On the road to somewhere

And you meet anyone you know It's me

I'm gonna move from place to place

And find a house with a golden stair

And if that house is red

And has a big brass bed

I'm livin' there

Why, I ought to...

This place could sure use a woman.

I got Molly.

Of course, she can't cook worth a damn...

...and devil a bit of talent she's got for housekeeping.

But she does her share.

Does most of the hunting and fishing.

Ain't it time somebody told that motherless lass she's a girl?

She hunts and fishes, whistles like a calliope.

And my boys tell me she swears like a bargeman.

Been doing that since she was 3.

She's reached the age for getting into trouble.

Time to marry her off, Shamus.

Marry? Who'd marry Molly?

Well, there must be somebody who doesn't know her.

Whatever happened to that Johnson boy who hung around here a while back?

He tried to show her his pa's hayloft.

She tied a can to his tail and sent him rattling down the road.

That's been the only one.

There's your boys.

Molly, honey! I love you, baby!

You leaving home, Molly?

It's time, Pa.

I've thought it through.

There's nothing for me here.

Here, you're just born...

...and you live and you die.

What more is there, Molly?

Somewhere there's just got to be things to see...

...and do more than what there is here.

I'm gonna marry me a rich man like IKatie Spinner did.

Be careful about the love of money.

Oh, it ain't the money I love, Pa.

It's the not having it I hate.

Somehow I'll get me to Denver, and I'm gonna find me a man...

...with means to put a real roof over our heads...

...a roof that don't leak rain and cold.

I'm leaving at sunup, Pa.

I'll miss you.

I'll miss you too, Pa.

It's time I thanked you for pulling me out of the flood...

...and raising me like your own.

I guess I didn't know much about raising a girl.

Could be I done it wrong.

You done fine.

Nobody could've done better.

I'll send for you, Pa. I promise that.

You'll have your own room...

...where you can stay in bed all day with a jug of the best liquor.

I do that now.

Let me give you a word of advice, Molly-girl.

Learn to serve God and a hot breakfast.

And in your search for that roof that don't leak rain...

...beware of men that offer you a roof...

...and forget to mention marriage.

Find yourself a good man...

...a good Irish Catholic...

...and settle down.

The man I marry's got to be more than just Irish Catholic.

What more can a man be?

Well, if he's gonna crawl in next to me...

...he's gonna have to be the richest Irish Catholic next to the Pope!

Howdy!

Howdy, Colorado!

Colorado, my home sweet home

Hear yourself laugh And you laugh a lot more

Gives a man confidence To holler in the mountains

Hey there, Rio

Hey there, Rio Grande

Where else, Rio

Did you learn to roar

Well, I'll tell you

Let me tell you, Rio

Like me, you would be

Only a smalltime trickle

Without the mountains of Colorado

My home sweet home

A sky full of Rockies For my roof up there

A great golden meadow For my rockin' chair

A claim and a cabin And some breathin' air

Colorado, my home

And here till the Judgment I will stay

Here till the ponderosa walks away

Here where I'm proudest When I hear me say

Colorado, my home

Here's where the silver finds you

Together with the gold That will stick on your shoe

Missouri mules and plain damn fools May leave us for a little

But they'll all come back...

... someday

There ain't Seven Wonders

Only three

The mountains and meadows

Far as a man can see

And somewhere a Rocky Mountain gal For me

Colorado, my home

Colorado...

... my...

... home

How long you been there?

Long enough.

A nice pastime for a grown man.

- Go away. - This here is my land.

You're trespassing.

What're you doing here?

Washing off the dust of the road.

My feet hurt. I been walking for three days.

- Alone? - Why not?

How far is it to Leadville?

Long ways. Maybe 10 miles.

- Where'd you sleep last night? - Under a tree.

You're welcome to spend the night in my cabin.

I am, am I?

If you think you're reading my mind, you're wrong.

I ain't that needy.

Besides, you ain't that much, you know.

You're no prize.

Back home where I come from, we drown runts of the litter like you.

When'd you eat last?

Yesterday morning.

I got a pot on the stove.

You can sleep under a tree, if you're that mistrustful.

You'd better stoke up on some stew.

Come on. Let's eat.

That's real kind of you, Mr?

Brown. John J. Brown.

Come on in, set. Rest your feet.

It sure smells good.

What are you gonna do in Leadville?

It's just a stopping-off place for me to get some money.

The place I'm really heading for is Denver.

What's in Denver?

Beautiful people. Rich people.

I'm gonna get me a fine man. A rich man. A millionaire.

It sounds like me.

I'm gonna learn to read and write.

Can you read?

Sure.

Schooling till I was 9.

Read me what this says.

"Best regards from...

...IKatie Spinner."

- What's that mean? - What does what mean?

Regards.

It means not just regards...

...but best regards.

I see.

Best regards.

Whatever the hell that means.

And this one.

"Christmas greetings from IKatie Spinner."

That must've been at Christmastime.

It must've been.

Ain't that beautiful?

Look at them big buildings.

What's the printing say?

That's " Pennsylvania Avenue...

...Denver, Colorado."

Pennsylvania Avenue.

That's where the rich folks live.

That's where I'm gonna live.

Before or after you hook the millionaire?

- After. - What're you gonna use for bait?

Chickapen, I'm sorry.

You got a real nice face.

I'm probably the only man in 20 miles who knows you're...

...a woman.

With a capital W and two O's.

Let's eat. I gotta get going.

Plenty of time. Leadville's just over the hill.

"Just over the hill"?

Maybe a mile.

You said it was a "long ways." You said, "Maybe 10 miles."

Welcome to spend the night in your cabin.

You scabby he-goat!

My pa warned me about this. But you're a smooth one.

Flimflam and sweet-talk, and here I am under that roof!

What's the roof?

I'm getting out of here!

You double-tongued, low-minded, sneaky, scheming polecat!

Oh, I knew I was gonna...

Howdy, Christmas. How's business?

There ain't any.

They all been over at the Nugget since yesterday.

They got entertainment. You ain't got no entertainment.

Yeah, I know.

I hear tell they got a gal over there that sings.

Her sister plays the piano.

And every once in a while, the singing one...

...she bends over to turn the pages for the one playing the piano.

It's a great show.

You taken to doing the sweeping yourself now?

Well, Henry left. I gotta find me another helper.

I'm a helper.

It's a job for a man.

Oh, I can do it. I can do anything.

You're new in town.

I just got here. I need a place to sleep and something to eat...

...and I'll work hard because...

...I got no money.

All right.

All right!

I'll give you a try. Come on.

Hey, Christmas, maybe she can sing.

Something smells real good.

Got a ham cooking in the kitchen.

Say, can you sing?

I can sing the hogs out of the hills.

Get you a fancy dress and fix your hair up.

You'll look as good as them hens across the way.

You sure you can sing?

Oh, sure. Sure.

What's the matter?

I feel kind of funny.

I guess I'm awful hungry.

Oh, we'll get you something to eat.

- Can you handle a box? - A box?

A piano. Can you play it?

A piano.

Oh, sure. Sure.

If you can play the piano and you can sing, you got yourself a job.

I'll get you a fancy dress and fix your...

Belly, belly

Belly up

Belly up to the bar, boys Belly up to the bar, boys

Where'd you go?

Belly up, belly up to the bar, boys Better loosen your belts

Only drink when you're all alone Or with somebody else

Belly up, belly up to the bar, boys Better have a few more

I never whirl with a three-toed girl Or a discontented...

Horrible example

Like the girl whose name was Carrie

She carried her charms To everybody else

Her I had to marry Or die, die, die

Had to marry Carrie Or die, die, die

Belly up, belly up to the bar, boys Let your money be seen

Only drink by day or night Or somewheres in between

Belly up, belly up to the bar, boys Very good for your mind

Both feet on the rails Will make you fall on your be...

Hidle-deedle-didle-didle

I call her Fazelda She giggles at me and everybody else

Had to marry zelda Or die, die, die

Got to wed Fazelda Or die, die, die

Thank you, Mr. Brown.

You left it in my cabin.

Thought you might want it.

Oh, yes.

I wouldn't wanna lose them picture post cards of Denver.

Don't know what's the use of them if you can't read them.

Oh, but I'm gonna learn to read.

Who's gonna teach you?

You?

"The cat sees the rat.

The rat sees the cat.

The cat runs...

...after the rat.

This is my hat.

It is a red hat."

What happened to the rat?

The cat ate it.

"The little girl's name is Mary. The little boy's name is Tom.

This is the barn.

Mary and Tom are in the hayloft.

This is Mary's mother. She is baking a pie."

She better stop baking and go take a look in the barn.

"My name is Molly Tobin.

My teacher is Johnny Brown."

That's real nice.

Thank you.

I guess you'll be leaving real soon. I hear the money's rolling in.

I had to buy some new clothes. I got $50. It ain't enough.

What'd be enough, Molly?

Enough so's me and my pa could have a roof over our heads...

...that don't leak rain and cold.

Go on, chickapen. I got to know.

Enough so's I could have stoves for heating and cooking.

Enough so's I could have my own brass bed.

Enough so's I could have saucers that match the cups.

Enough so's my pa could stay in bed all day with a jug...

...if he had a hankering to.

And enough so's folks'd call me a lady.

That'd take a lot more than $50.

That's why I gotta find me a miner with a rich claim.

I got a claim. The side of Hippo Mountain.

Plenty of silver in it.

No fooling. A gentleman from New York's been trying to buy it.

I ain't got much use for money, but I do all right.

If the Hippo Mountain claim runs out, I'll find me another.

Find you another? Just like that?

Sure, it's easy because I got a talent for it. Gold and silver...

...they just holler out to me.

Well, hell's fire! Why don't you listen?

I'll take all I need out of it.

And I got my other piece of land with a cabin on it.

That's real pretty land. The stream and all. Remember?

But it needs a woman.

Get yourself one.

A gal could be happy there, Molly.

Why won't you settle for happiness?

I'll never say no...

... to you

Whatever you say or do

If you ask me to wait...

... for a lifetime

You know I'll gladly wait

For a lifetime or two

Just to look at you

I'll smile when you say, "Be glad"

I'll weep if you want me sad

Today is tomorrow

If you want it so

I'll stay or I'll go

But I'll never...

... say no

I'd never even think twice. I'd never even blink twice.

Ask me! Ask me anything you want!

I want a house with a looking-out window.

One looking-out window for the lady!

I'll never say no to you

- I want a red silk dress. - Yes.

- I wanna go see Denver. - Yes.

- I want my own brass bed. - Yes!

- Oh, go jump in the lake. - Yes!

No, Johnny!

I'll never say no

Never say no

No! You stay away from me, Johnny Brown!

You got a danger sign on you big as a house!

And I swore I'd get me a rich husband in Denver!

A rich husband? Love or no love?

That's right!

I left home to get away from a scrawly life...

...and the only way is to marry the right man.

What makes you think I ain't the right man?

Because you don't care. You and that mine, you don't work.

So just stay away from me, Johnny Brown, because...

...because...

...because I can't lie.

I do have a feeling for you.

I'll smile...

... if you say, "Be glad"

I'll weep...

... if you want me sad

Today is tomorrow

If you want it so

I'll stay...

... or I'll go

But I'll never...

... say no

Let me go!

Let me go!

Let me!

You let me go. Let me go.

Nobody's gonna stop me.

Nothing's gonna get me down!

I'll never say no...

... to you

Whatever you say...

... or do

And if you tell me you want me To wait for a lifetime

You know I'm gladly gonna wait

For a lifetime or two

Just to look at you

I'm gonna break right out laughin'

If you tell me that you want me To be glad

I'm gonna cry like a babe

If you say that you want me to be sad

I'll laugh or cry I'll sob or sigh

I'll stay or I'll go

But I'll never

Never ever

I'll never ever say no

Howdy.

My, the way you're prettied up, you'd think we was going to church...

...instead of showing me a mine.

Didn't say I'd show you a mine.

You said you'd show me what you been working on.

That's right.

Johnny Brown, I know this place.

You're taking me to the little ol' cabin of yours.

You know better!

Now, hold your britches. I ain't taking you to my "little ol' cabin."

It's my big, new cabin.

Well, dip me and fry me!

Wait till you see what I got to show you.

This here's the porch. Two rockers for setting out on summer nights.

My, how nice!

This here is the main room.

I got a stove for heating.

And a stove for cooking.

And cups with saucers that match.

You sure do remember things, Johnny Brown.

Things you say, chickapen.

Come on. Come on.

There's a room for your pa.

You built a room for Pa.

And a jug on the table just waiting for him.

Come on.

You got yourself a bed.

I'll say that for you, Johnny Brown.

You like it, Molly?

It's the most beautiful thing...

...I ever seen.

Look here.

You can do your bathing inside the house.

Golly, ain't that something!

It sure is pretty.

Oh, that bed.

It's so soft.

But real strong.

It come all the way from Denver.

You done all this for me.

Nobody never done nothing special for me before...

...just for me...

...in my whole life.

We're getting married today.

It's against all the things I ever dreamed of.

But it'd be against nature for me to say no.

Besides, I sure couldn't stand anybody else sleeping in that...

...beautiful brass bed, with the stars shining...

Ready?

Ready for what?

Here comes the bride

Here comes the bride

You look so lovely, my dear.

Congratulations, Molly-doll.

Hurry up, Father, before she changes her mind.

Now, go on, get started.

You got the ring?

- The ring. - Oh, the ring. Yeah, I got the ring.

The ring.

The ring?

- I forgot the ring! - It's all right.

This'll do for now.

Oh, I forgot. You!

Come on, it's your wedding.

Christmas, it's that way.

Good night.

Good night.

Good night, Polak.

The most beautiful wedding I ever saw.

Something wrong, Mrs. Brown?

A paper ring.

And no wedding dress.

And you're sozzled!

So's everybody. It was a fine wedding.

Not for me.

Not for me!

What have I gone and done?

I've gone and married me a drunken...

...good-for-nothing miner who don't even work at mining!

What's the use of cups and saucers if you don't care?

I let myself be bamboozled...

...by a brass bed and a cooking stove...

...and a room for Pa...

...and a lot of fine talking.

In my heart, it went "waboom" when you touched me.

What have I gone and done?

It's me, chickapen.

Are you all right?

Are you all right?

Sure, darlin'.

That's good!

And now I'm getting out!

- What for? - What for?

Leaving me alone here for three days, worrying my heart out.

- Don't you wanna know where I been? - I can guess.

No, you got it all wrong. Now here, look. Look here.

$300,000! Sold my claim to that gentleman from New York.

It took a while to sign the papers and get the cash.

But now I'm back home. You ain't mad at me, are you?

I thought you was mad at me for carrying on so after the wedding.

I thought you didn't want me.

Oh, chickapen.

Calm down, girl.

I been traveling for three days...

...and I ain't fit for a bride and a fine brass bed.

Well, I better go get washed up.

What're you gonna buy with all that money?

My, I don't know.

First, we'll send for Pa...

...and then we'll get you a fine gold watch.

And you'll have a real gold wedding ring.

And a red dress.

And a "go to hell" hat!

Is that you, Johnny?

It's me, darlin'. Just having a little drink to warm myself up.

That water sure is icy.

Your hair is real wet.

I'm shaking with the cold.

I'm fine now.

My backside's hot as a griddle.

I was warming it by the fire.

Fire?

Fire?

What fire?

The stove.

Molly-girl, what is it?

What's the matter? Have you gone crazy?

I hid the money in the stove!

Water! Water!

Molly, you'll burn yourself. Get away from there!

It's too late, Molly!

My ring's on fire! My ring! Look, it's ashes.

Oh, the money and my ring. Everything's gone.

Now, listen.

Now, look. No, listen!

It's only money! I can get us some more.

Listen to me. Darlin', darlin'!

Darlin'!

Are you gonna wallop me?

What for? It's me who lit the fire.

You ain't mad at me?

Of course not.

What was you chasing me around the room for?

You was running. I thought you was out of your skull.

What was you running for?

I was just scared. That's all.

What?

I was just...

...scared.

Of me?

I thought...

I thought you was gonna wallop me.

I will wallop you if you don't come on back to bed.

Oh, now, now.

You don't wanna keep that sobbing up all night.

I just can't seem to stop.

I don't want you crying over the money.

I ain't.

It's you being so forgiving and...

Now we'll never get to Denver!

Well, if you're gonna keep up that weeping and wailing...

...might as well go out right now and find me another mine.

Come back!

Talk to me, gold and silver!

Holler loud, because I got a gal that burns money up!

Come back!

You gonna stop that crying?

Yes, yes.

Oh, yes! Johnny, yes!

Say you love me.

I love you, Johnny.

That's better.

Ladies and gentlemen...

...we are now entering Pennsylvania Avenue.

Up and down this beautiful avenue are...

...the homes of the Sacred 36.

The cr�me de la cr�me of Denver.

The house on your left...

...is the home of Mrs. McGraw...

...the acknowledged leader of Denver society.

And this is the new show place of Pennsylvania Avenue.

It has just been remodeled by Mr. And Mrs. J.J. Brown...

...owner of the Little Johnny Mine...

...the richest gold strike in the history of Colorado.

This mine has already produced $ 10 million.

Fourteen million! And plenty more where that come from.

Goodbye, folks!

Have yourself a nice ride!

Don't believe everything that fellow tells you.

Pa, I told you, you mustn't do that every day now. It ain't elegant.

I got nothing else to do.

Leave it lay. How many times must I tell you?

I like a lived-in feeling in one room of this fancy house.

All right, Pa.

And tell Hotchkiss to fetch me a fresh jug.

- Sure, Pa. - Thank you, darlin'.

Hotchkiss!

Yes, madam.

Get my pa another jug.

Yes, madam.

What's that?

Present.

What is it?

A new wedding ring.

What's wrong with this one?

That ain't the one you was married with. I got another.

More fitting.

Now.

Make sure you never ever take it off unless I tell you to, chickapen.

Promise me.

I promise.

A cigar band!

Indian head and all!

And rubies and sapphires and diamonds!

The man said there ain't another like it in the whole world.

Oh, it's real beautiful, Johnny.

Thank you.

I'm glad you like it.

What do you wanna do today?

I don't know.

Wanna go and buy something?

We done that yesterday.

Wanna go for a walk?

Let's play another game of blackjack.

Excuse me. Mr. Cartwright from the bank is downstairs.

You tell him we'll be right there.

Thank you, madam.

Johnny, you go down and talk to him. I gotta find my shoes.

Hurry up.

I'll be right down!

Howdy, Mr. Cartwright.

- Nice to see you. - Good afternoon, Mrs. Brown.

- How's things at the bank? - Fine.

- Have a seat. - Thank you.

- Nice weather we've been having. - Sit here.

This one's a good chair. Cost a pot of money.

Thank you.

It's a pleasure to be seeing one of Denver's Sacred 36 in our home.

Sit, sit.

It gets lonesome around here.

It's a fine idea for you to come here instead of us running to the bank.

I understand. I have the money here.

That's fine. Now, you just set a while.

No, I must get back to the bank.

Hotchkiss!

Hotchkiss, where's me jug?

Pa, say hello to Mr. Cartwright!

Mr. Cartwright, say hello to my pa.

Howdy, Mr. Cartwright.

Nice to see a new face. It gets lonesome around here.

You'd think with a place crawling with flunkies...

...a thirsty man could get a jug now and then.

- Don't you wanna count it? - I guess you've done that.

Here.

How about some fudge?

Not right now, thank you.

Oh, you keep that.

Thank you, no.

I must get back to the bank.

Well, drop in and see us again sometime, Mr. Cartwright.

Bring your friends.

Oh, bring Mrs. Cartwright. We're always here.

Good heavens!

I've never seen anything like that.

It's solid gold!

Yep. That's what it is.

I presume the "B" stands for Brown?

Well, it don't stand for backhouse.

Mr. Cartwright, you come back real soon.

Thanks again.

- You're welcome. - You come and see us real soon.

What's going on over there?

It's the caterer delivering things for Mrs. McGraw's party.

Party? What party?

Mrs. McGraw gives a party every year when her roses bloom. Goodbye.

Ain't that wonderful?

What?

She gives a party when her roses bloom.

Good evening, Father. I believe you all know Monsignor Ryan.

You've been fortunate in the weather. The garden is most attractive.

Oh, thank you.

I haven't been here since the house next door was remodeled.

Oh, yes. Dreadful, isn't it?

But at least the noise of the remodeling is over.

I've seen Mrs. Brown on the avenue. She's a little strange.

They overpay their servants.

The entire economy of Pennsylvania Avenue has been affected.

I'm told they drive up and down the avenue...

...while she shouts greetings to passersby.

Well, perhaps they're lonely.

Have you called on them to welcome them? Mrs. McGraw?

Mrs. Fitzgerald?

Monsignor, have you seen the roses?

Evening, folks. Molly Brown's the name.

This here's Johnny Brown, owner of the Little Johnny.

Richest mine in the United States.

There you be, neighbor!

Howdy.

Brown's the name.

We're the ones from that little shack next door.

How do you do, Mrs. Brown?

Great!

To tell you the truth, the Denver water's a little hard on the kidneys...

...but we love it here.

Mr. Brown!

- Say hello to Mrs. McGraw. - Sure. Howdy.

We was out for a walk and saw your lights was on...

...so we just thought we'd drop in.

May I present Monsignor Ryan.

Well, hello there, Monsignor.

Glad to make your acquaintance.

- Mr. Brown. - Howdy.

I read about your school fund in the paper.

Here's $5000, and good luck.

Well, I hardly know what to say.

God bless you, Mrs. Brown.

What you standing there for?

Match my 5000. Or be high-class and double it.

Sure. Glad to. Here you are, Father.

One, two, three...

Took a few million out of God's earth.

Guess He deserves a little kickback.

That should see them into heaven.

Well, maybe it'll grease the gates a little.

Ten thousand.

I'm sorry it's all in ones.

God bless you both.

Fifteen thousand dollars!

Think nothing of it.

Once took 20 times that just to warm J.J.'s backside.

Besides, this here is our home now...

...and we wanna belong.

Gotta keep up with Mrs. McGraw.

How much did you?

How much did you kick in, Gladys?

Well, as a matter of fact, I...

I haven't made my contribution yet.

- You haven't? - No.

What's the matter with you, Gladys? You got plenty, I hear.

Now, Roberts!

Dinner is served, madam.

Thank you. Shall we?

Mrs. McGraw regrets that there isn't room at the table for two more.

She hopes you will excuse her.

Well, we just popped in.

Tell her it was great meeting her...

...and not to give the Browns a second thought.

Yes, madam.

I'm sorry you aren't staying, but I assume you had other plans.

Oh, yes.

We're pretty busy.

You go on inside before your supper gets cold.

Good night, and may God go with you.

See you in church.

- Come on. - Wait.

Wait. Oh, I just gotta see how they do.

Come on.

Ain't that pretty?

Why, there's plenty of room at that table.

It sure smells good, Gladys.

Eat hearty, folks!

Come on, Molly. Come on.

Wasn't that fine?

All them beautiful people.

Everything trimmed so gorgeous...

...and the people is trimmed too.

The good Lord outdid Hisself on Pennsylvania Avenue...

...and we're right smack in the middle of it.

Did you have a good time?

Had more fun in Leadville by accident than they have on purpose.

They're cold fish.

Oh, no, that's dignity, Mr. Brown. Dignity.

And we're gonna get us some.

They could've made room for us.

Well, howdy.

Howdy, Shamus.

- Howdy, folks! - She knows my name.

I know plenty.

Come in. Come in, you pretty thing.

- Evening. - Evening.

We're having a bite to eat. Come in.

Thank you, kindly.

How about a dish of stew?

I'd rather have a beer.

That was sure a dreary party, wasn't it?

Was you there?

No, but I was watching. I'm Mrs. McGraw's ma.

Howdy, Mrs. McGraw.

Not Mrs. McGraw. Grogan.

Me daughter, Gladys, married a McGraw...

...but I'm Mrs. Grogan. Buttercup Grogan.

How come you ain't at the party?

Ain't never invited to Gladys' parties. She keeps me hid upstairs.

- Hid? - When she's company.

She's the leader of Denver society.

That ain't a nice way to treat you.

I don't mind. Them friends of hers with their pinkies up...

...ain't my kind of folks.

Well, it's sure good to be here.

Took me a little time to get up the nerve to come.

What are you going to do about it?

About what?

About Gladys and the way she gave you the brushoff.

It wasn't neighborly, and that's a fact.

There wasn't any room at the table.

Bull sugar!

Gladys is giving you the treatment. Don't you let her.

Mol doesn't need Mrs. McGraw.

Yes, she does. You're living here. You've got to belong.

But Denver's giving you the go-by.

'Tis true. We get pretty lonesome around here.

Hold your tongue. We're doing fine.

We ain't doing fine.

You ain't going about it right.

You can't just yell "hello" to folks in the street.

You must invite them formal to your house, with printed invitations.

A party!

With invitations printed in gold!

That's the ticket!

We'll give the biggest hellbender of a party Pennsylvania Avenue ever seen!

A flaming toot!

A randy Dan!

With a band playing music, like at Mrs. McGraw's, only bigger and louder!

Come on back, chickapen.

If anybody wants to come, they'd know for sure this is where the Browns live.

Hell, you got it writ on everything...

...from the weathervane to the hitching post.

Now, come on.

It's after 10:00.

I'm sorry it turned out like this, Molly.

I bet you it was Gladys what gave you the axe.

I should've known.

I'm walking Buttercup home, Mol.

Good night, Buttercup.

- Good night, Molly. - Thanks for coming.

I'm sorry there ain't no party, Monsignor.

Sit down a minute, Molly, Johnny.

I guess the Sacred 36 just don't want no part of us.

This is not New York or Paris.

Denver society is only in its second generation.

The veneer is thin.

Now, true aristocrats might accept you...

...but here, you're a painful reminder of where they came from.

You're unschooled, and you're full of unharnessed enthusiasm.

Denver isn't sophisticated enough to appreciate that.

We should've stayed in the hills where we belong.

May I make a suggestion?

- Shoot, Father. - Take a trip.

A nice, long tour of Europe.

You'll enjoy it, and you'll acquire a little polish.

Polish?

Like what?

Learn something about art and music.

Learn manners.

Get a smattering of languages.

All that just to show Mrs. McGraw?

Go ahead, Father.

I'm learning already.

I've said enough. I think you understand.

I'll say good night now.

Thanks for the advice.

You're right. We sure are ignorant.

But we're gonna get schooled...

...and harnessed and be second-generation if it kills us.

It won't. Good night, Molly.

Good night.

Thanks again.

Look at it.

Ain't it beautiful?

Pennsylvania Avenue...

...I'll admit, you gave me a nosefull of splinters...

...but it's all good wood from the very best doors.

Come on, Mol.

- Now we're going back to Leadville. - Never.

We ain't staying where we're not wanted.

Johnny, I can't go back to Leadville.

We gotta go one way or the other. Ahead is better than back.

I know what's back there. Ahead is something new.

Maybe better, maybe not. But I gotta find out.

We don't belong in Europe.

They'll split their satin britches laughing at us!

I'll never say no to you

I mean it, Mol.

Whatever you say or do

We ain't going.

Today is tomorrow

If you want it so

We're going back where we belong.

I'll stay or I'll go

But I'll never say...

We'll go down to hell and back if you like.

I love you, Johnny.

Now, Mr. Brown.

We're gonna learn to read and write

In French!

We're gonna see what there is to see

In French!

For every one step backward We'll go two steps forward

Till we stake us a claim on dignity

In French!

You hear that, Mrs. McGraw?

The Browns are having a party!

And we ain't down yet!

We got a new friend.

Guess what? He's a real live prince.

Oh, ain't that something! Because look what I got.

And she's a grand duchess.

Howdy.

Howdy?

- Well, howdy. - Howdy, madame.

You two know each other.

Ain't that nice?

Molly, dear, you are funny.

Here, I'm funny. In Denver, I'm vulgar.

I guess it's like...

...here, you eat snails. At home, we step on them.

She has finally learned to eat snails.

With this sauce, you could eat erasers.

Thank you.

I can't find words.

And you know that's unusual for me.

I want you to know...

...I appreciate how sweet you've been to I and J.J.

J.J. And me.

Me and J. J?

Well, anyway, as we say, merci beaucoup!

The candles, Molly.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Many happy returns, Molly.

You Frenchies sure are a kissy bunch of bananas!

It's because we love you.

You've been a breath of fresh air in our world.

I'm a bag of wind, all right.

No, darling, it's true. You're a stimulant to all of us.

You like everybody and everything.

I'm interested in everything because I don't know nothing.

That's not true, Molly.

But I'm learning. I'm really learning.

I can sit through the opera without going to sleep.

Here you are.

And I can paint a bowl of fruit that'll draw flies.

And I can say "hello" and "how much" in 10 different languages.

Hell, I'm just a hog for knowledge.

Molly, what did Johnny give you for your birthday?

Something real sweet.

With a lot of sentiment attached.

$300,000 in cash and a box of matches.

He told us how you burnt the money in your little stove.

Belly up, belly up to the bar, boys

Better loosen your belts

Only drink when you're all alone

Or with somebody else

Somebody else

It wasn't nice to stay away from my birthday party.

You went without me.

I left early with the grand duchess to arrange the place cards.

You said you'd join us.

I didn't think I'd be missed, not with the prince there.

In case you don't know it, and I think you do, he's gone on you.

So what if he is?

That's the way in Europe.

You're in a mood.

I am.

You've been in a mood for days.

I sure have. I'm going plumb crazy.

It ain't the prince. I know that ain't serious.

It's just that I've had culture up to here.

Drunk tea till my eyes are bubbly and wine till I'm woozy.

I can't get the hang of their lingo and their manners.

- I'm homesick. - Do I get to talk?

All the time! I got something to...

Ladies first, Mr. Brown.

I just wanted you to know I thought it was time we went home.

Well, that's what I was gonna say.

You ain't fooling me?

Colorado! Home!

I'll get tickets tomorrow.

You'd better get about 10 of them.

Ten of them?

I invited the crowned heads of Europe to be our guests.

I promised the grand duchess and the prince we'd show them Denver.

They have to bring along their friends.

Because royalty don't even go to the shed unescorted.

You showing off Denver to the crowned heads...

...or the crowned heads off to Denver and Mrs. McGraw?

Mrs. McGraw?

I wouldn't give a widow's wart for Mrs. McGraw.

Molly Brown, you're either Iying to me or to yourself.

When will you stop trying to be her? You ain't got it in you.

I could be anything I want.

Maybe.

I like the old Molly best.

Well, that's too bad, J.J.

Because the old me ain't...

- isn't no more.

I've had a grand time putting the new me together.

I'm sorry you don't take to us because you paid the bills.

And I'm gonna keep right on paying them, chickapen.

I love you with a heart and a half.

We got dignity and culture We can parler fran�ais

We've spent a million dollars On the rue de la Paix

But none of that'll matter Once we're on our way to

Colorado, our home

Colorado

Our...

... home

Howdy, everybody.

Welcome. Glad to see you're here at last.

- Good evening. - Good evening, Mrs. Brown.

- How do you do? - How do you do?

- Thank you for coming. - I'm happy to be here, dear.

Good evening, Father.

- You look beautiful. - Thank you.

They're all here this evening.

Good evening, I...

Good heavens, look at this place.

It's frightening. What period would you call it?

I'd call it the "Reign of Terror."

A touch of red might help.

She likes red.

- Good evening, Roberts. - Good evening.

I figured I needed him more than you did.

- Welcome, Gladys. - Thank you.

You know Mr. Broderick, of course.

I don't know as I do.

Then let me introduce you to one of your guests.

This is Mr. Malcolm Broderick of the Denver Record.

- How do you do, Mr. Broderick? - How do you do?

You're the society writer.

I used to read your society talk every day.

Thank you, Mrs. Brown. I hope you found it interesting.

No, but it was good practice for my reading.

I see.

And how do you find Denver after being away so long?

I don't know, mon ami, but I'm going to find out.

One thing's for damn sure...

...we ain't putting up with no Rocky Mountain rudeness.

We're second-generation now.

May I quote you?

Bet your bottom. Write it all down.

And talk about your Sacred 36.

Wait till you take a look at my royal flush!

Now, Roberts.

Shall we?

His Highness, Prince Louis de Lani�re!

The Count and Countess Ferranti!

How do you do?

Baron IKarl Ludwig von Ettenburg!

What a beautiful painting.

Is it one of yours, my dear?

Yes, Herr Baron.

I have one of Mrs. Brown's paintings hanging in my Schloss.

That's his castle on the Rhine.

- How do you do, Mrs. McGraw? - How do you do?

Do you paint, my dear?

What a pity.

Her Royal Highness...

...the Grand Duchess Elise Lupovinova!

You're supposed to curtsy, Gladys. She's a royal highness.

Molly, dear, I've been admiring your magnificent piano.

I hope you'll play us some Chopin later on.

Do you play, Mrs. McGraw?

No, Duchess...

Your Highness...

Your Royal...

Sorry.

What a pity.

Mrs. Buttercup Grogan!

Hello, Gladys.

Surprise, surprise!

Ladies and gentlemen...

...these are our amis from Leadville.

Amis, hell. These are our friends!

Standing here is Christmas Morgan Sings in the choir and pumps the organ

If I should yell, "I'm a-drownin', Morgan!"

He'd come chargin' in

He's my friend And he'll stay my friend

Doesn't matter what The other people say

He's my friend To the bitter end

Even though the bitter end's A million years away

Call him Tobin or call him Shamus

Beat him in a fight And you'll be famous

If I should yell, "They got me, Shamus!"

He'd come chargin' in

He's my friend And he'll stay my friend

Doesn't matter what The other people say

He's my friend To the bitter end

Even though the bitter end's A million years away

This lass is my good friend Buttercup Makes me heart go flip and flutter up

Talk behind my back to Buttercup She'll come chargin' in

She's my friend And she'll stay my friend

Doesn't matter what The other people say

She's my friend To the bitter end

Even though the bitter end's A million years away

Denver ladies next to a duchess Sashay like they're walkin' on crutches

If anyone bothers this here duchess I'll come chargin' in

She's my friend And she'll stay my friend

Doesn't matter what The other people say

She's my friend To the bitter end

Even though the bitter end's A million years away

The most extraordinary thing in town

Is the perfectly charming Molly Brown

And if anyone dares to presume To display a disparaging frown

They'll have me to reckon with

And me

And me

And me

She's my friend And she'll stay my friend

Doesn't matter what The other people say

She's my friend To the bitter end

Even though the bitter end's A million years away

Shocking!

It's a dance for a bawdyhouse.

My dear, that's the way she earned her living in Leadville.

- Mother! - Shut up, Gladys!

Timber!

Please stop!

Well, at last this place looks lived in.

- Good morning, Mr. Tobin. - Morning.

Molly sure knowed what she was doing when she made this place red.

The blood don't show.

You're a better man than I thought, Mr. Roberts.

You did fine last night.

Thank you very much, sir.

It's dreadful! Simply dreadful!

Your Mr. Broderick isn't a reporter. He's an ignorant, spiteful barbarian.

But it's lies. All lies.

Everybody knows the Merry Christmas Saloon ain't no fancy-house.

The things he quotes me saying.

All those blanks that stand for bad words.

Well, I guess I did let a couple go.

"'One thing's for blank sure,' said Mrs. Brown.

'We ain't putting up with no blank-blank Rocky Mountain rudeness.'"

And worst of all, it ain't even on the society page.

It's on the sports page!

It isn't only Broderick, Molly. It's all of your Sacred 36.

They've sent flowers and invitations to Louis, to me and to the others...

...but nothing for you and Johnny.

I've never known such uncivilized behavior.

Things were pretty uncivilized here last night.

But it wasn't your fault.

Louis and I think we should go home as soon as possible.

- Yes. - All of us.

You've outgrown Denver. You cannot exist here, my darling.

The air is much too thin.

Sail with us on the next boat.

You are not the same here, ch�rie. You were free and happy in Europe.

Come back.

Let me make a happy world for you again.

Louis...

...let us tell the others.

You all read in this morning's paper about a free-for-all battle...

...that took place last night in this million-dollar pile of rock.

At a party given by an overnight millionaire...

...named Johnny Brown...

...the guests were attacked by drunken miners.

It is known that although Mrs. Brown now buys her jewels by the bushel...

...only a short while ago, she was a bargirl in a mining town saloon.

Get out of here before I load up again!

Get out of here, you Iying, stinking polecats!

Are you out of your skull?

They came sightseeing. I'll give them something to see!

They ain't turning us into no sideshow!

Looks like you're making it a three-ring circus...

...firing out like a liquored-up redskin.

Liquored up? You're a fine one to be bellowing about liquored up.

You and your Leadville friends!

I wish we'd kept at it till we had this whole house tore clear to shreds!

I hate this place!

Good! Because we're leaving. We're going home to Europe.

We're going home to Leadville.

No, we are not. I ain't living in Colorado.

The air is much too thin!

Learn to breathe it because we're living in Leadville.

I'm living in Europe.

You're my wife. You live under the roof I give you!

And it's gonna be in Leadville.

Don't talk so bossy, Johnny Brown.

I got only one life to live, and I ain't living it in Leadville.

Europe's been good to me. I learned a lot.

And if you're too plumb stubborn or too plumb lazy...

...or too plumb stupid to learn, then the devil with you!

Maybe we're mismatched, Mr. Brown.

What you and me want out of this life sure is different.

You don't know what you want. You got rich too quick.

You're all mixed up.

I'm asking you for the last time.

You coming with me?

All right. You go to Europe with your prince.

I'm not going.

I'm saying no to you at last.

No.

Molly, what happened to us?

I'll never say no

I'll never say no

Damn you!

Damn you, Molly Brown!

I just got one favor to ask you, Molly.

We said goodbye, didn't we?

All right.

Now, just stay away. Don't you never come back.

When you say goodbye, mean goodbye!

Remember...

...I said goodbye at Leadville once.

Well, I meant it. Didn't I?

Said goodbye

And walked away

Walked away from all I know

From the sky and the trees

And the snowcapped mountains

Said goodbye and left forever

Because I loved you

Oh, I could say goodbye

To many things

Deep inside my heart

I could easy take that heart

And tear it free

From every kind of memory

And I could say goodbye someday

To life itself

No matter when

Would you stay away, Molly? Just stay away!

For I could never say

Goodbye to you

Again

I ordered a Nebuchadnezzar of champagne.

Good thing he's a prince. I sure couldn't afford a king.

With Molly, I am a king...

...because she is a queen.

Well, a toast.

To our own Queen Molly. International Molly, queen of the world.

Hail, hail.

Queen of the world.

At last.

Queen of the world.

Here is my scepter.

Here is my crown.

I'm queen of the world, so bow.

I'm Molly Tobin, queen of the lard pail.

Bow.

Curtsy.

Drop my drawers.

It's Gladys McGraw.

Aren't you going to curtsy?

No, I guess you aren't.

And why should you?

I'm a vulgar, extravagant, ignorant...

...nouveau riche American expatriate...

...clowning for a bunch of people I don't know and don't care about.

Just a figure of fun.

Nice to see you, Gladys.

And this is what I've become.

I guess, last of all, comes something you can't buy with money.

Last of all, it's just living with yourself.

Maybe I'm getting there.

Maybe that's where I'm getting.

Johnny used to say:

"Why don't you settle for happiness?"

But I thought happiness was all the things I was doing.

It was what I wanted.

It was what I dreamed of.

I don't know.

I don't know.

Seem to be saying that pretty often, nowadays.

I don't know. I don't know.

A letter from Johnny.

"Dear Mrs. Brown:

The time has come.

You can take the ring off now.

Sincerely...

...J.J. Brown."

He can't even spell "sincerely."

But he was the one taught me to read.

Oh, uncle!

Uncle.

Uncle?

It's an old American expression...

...for when you're down.

And I'm down.

I'm down real low.

You and I, Louis...

...we're just fooling ourselves.

Forgive me.

I know it's been rough on you.

I have tried...

...but it's against my nature.

Love is funny.

It's a lot harder to mine than gold or silver.

I had a rich claim.

I wasn't working it.

So I lost it.

Do you really believe he no longer means...

...what he wrote inside this ring?

Inside the ring?

The inscription.

Didn't know there was an inscription.

Never had it off since the day he put it on.

He made me promise not to.

"Always remember two things:

That I love you...

...and the name of the bank."

Maybe I...

...ain't down yet.

Oh, my God. George!

- We're all going to die! - Stop it!

Stop it! Sit down!

Sit down! You're rocking the boat! Stop yelling!

We're gonna die. We're gonna die.

No, we ain't! I ain't ready to die!

Hell, I'm just learning how to live!

There you are, honey. Now, you keep warm.

Now, stop crying.

Crying ain't gonna help.

Here, take these.

Now, you hold on real tight.

I don't wanna die. I don't wanna die!

Oh, God!

What are we gonna do?

Ladies and gent...

...did I ever tell you about the time I was a bargirl in a saloon?

I sang a song that I'm gonna teach you now.

And you'll learn all the words.

- I'll try. - You too.

We'll never make it. We're going to sink!

Not with Molly Brown onboard.

That ship may be down, but not me.

I'm unsinkable!

I survived the Colorado floods when I was 6 months old, so this is nothing!

So we're gonna be all right if we keep our heads. Now let's sing!

"Denver's heroine, our own Mrs. J.J. Brown...

...who is known throughout the world as the Unsinkable Molly Brown...

...returns to Denver today.

When interviewed during her triumphant week in New York...

...she made light of her heroism...

...despite the glowing reports from her fellow passengers.

She said, 'I sure as blank...

...wasn't ready for a blank-blank watery grave.

So I just blank, well, took the others along with me.'

On her last day in New York, the Unsinkable Mrs. Brown...

...was decorated by the British government for her courage.

When asked about the medal, she said:

'A girl can always use another piece of jewelry.'"

She's here. She's here now.

Thank you. Thank you.

Oh, my goodness. Pa!

Oh, Buttercup!

Christmas!

Polak!

Hello, Father.

- Johnny not here? - Hey, Mol, look who's coming!

Welcome home, Molly.

Thank you, Gladys.

It's very nice of you to come over.

- Come on, tell her! - Yes. Mother and I...

We're throwing a party for you to celebrate your homecoming.

The Sacred 36 is ready and waiting for you.

Now, get out of them traveling clothes, and get into a party dress.

Hurry! Hurry!

Yes, I'll join you as soon as I can.

Thank you, Gladys.

You're a good sport.

Molly, you're quite a woman.

Hurry up, now.

Molly, darlin', you should see all the telegrams, flowers, letters and all.

- Any letter from Johnny? - No.

But he wasn't much for writing letters.

Shamus!

- Go on. - Coming! Hurry up, darlin'.

- Hello, Roberts. - Welcome home, Mrs. Brown.

Thank you.

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