All language subtitles for Woman.Of.The.Hour.2023.1080p.BluRay.x264-VETO.SDH

[birdsong]

[birdsong]

[birdsong]

- [woman] Right here?
- [man] Yep.

Okay.

[woman]
I've never done this before.

What do I do?

[man laughs] Just be yourself.

Try and forget that
there's a camera here.

[woman] Okay.

[man] Tell me about yourself.

Where are you from?

[woman] Texas.

Texas, really?

What brings you to Wyoming?

My boyfriend and I
wanted to, uh--

well, ex-boyfriend...

we wanted to see all 50 states,

like, to say that we had seen
all of the states, before, um...

[sighs] Um...

Shit.

I'm so sorry.

Hey...

...you don't need
to apologize.

[woman] It's so embarrassing.

No, it's not.

Hey, look at me.

You're beautiful, okay?

It's fine.

Just... keep talking, okay?

So, yeah, we...

we wanted to have
this big adventure...

before the baby came.

So... that was the plan.

[laughing]

Um...

then he just left.

And, uh, I-- I...

And I don't know if it was me,
or if he just...

...he just didn't
wanna be a dad.

Have you told your family?

No.

No, my mom...

she never liked him, and I...

I don't wanna hear
"I told you so."

I... I'm terrified.

Like, I knew he was risky.

But, like... fuck it.

Everyone's risky.

I don't know.

I'm so sorry.

I'm just... blah, you know?

I just-- I haven't
really had a chance

to talk to anyone
about it yet, and I, um...

I really needed that.

Thank you.

What the fuck?

[crying out]

[screaming]

[gasping and coughing]

[woman falls silent]

[man panting]

[panting]

[coughing]

[whimpering]

[screaming]

It's just not quite right.

Yeah, I don't--
I don't feel sorry for her.

I just-- she's not sympathetic.

'Cause she seems angry.

That's it, she seems angry.

Mm-hmm. What about her look?

It's okay.

She kinda looks like
that one girl in that thing.

From the, uh--

The movie about the junkies
in Central Park.

Yes! I hated it.
Did you like it?

- No.
- Bad. It's bad.

It's horrible.

Did you want me
to try it again, or--?

No, that was great.

It says here that you did
your BFA in Acting at Columbia.

Yeah.

Yeah, I have a friend
who went through that program.

It's a great program, yeah.

What year did you graduate?

Hmm?

You might know each other.

I might. What's his name?

Hmm. Kevin Wetmore.

Mm... he might have been
before me.

Mm-hmm.

How do you know
he wasn't after you?

Hmm.

- Mm-hmm.
- Mm.

And... you're okay
with nudity, right?

Uh, no.
Um, it's just not for me.

Oh. No, I...

I'm sure they're fine.

All right, well...

Mm-hmm.

- We'll be in touch.
- Mm-hmm.

Okay. Um... well, great.

Yes.

Thank you guys so much.

Thank you.

Um, just...

Have a great rest of your day.

Always nice to see you.

Like-- as well.

Yeah, you too.

Yes.

Okay... Cheryl!

Yeah?

No. Uh...

Oh! Janet?

- Janet!
- Janet.

[???]

...and I really appreciate

that you keep
inviting me to audition.

I would just love it so much

if you could look up
from the table

when I'm reading the scene.

That would just...
just really make my day.

["I Don't Mind Doin' It"
by Jackie Lavant playing]

?...Climb a mountain high ?

? When I got to
my destination ?

[screaming]

? You wasn't on
the other side ?

[turning engine off]

Okay.

[Terry] It's sort of a big deal.

Network execs don't always
give actors direct notes,

but that's, like,
the best part.

This one pulls me over,
what does he say?

He says, "Your face.
Something about your face

has a lot of character."
Which is great.

Which means if I test well,

they'll make me
a recurring cast member.

You know,
not every single episode,

but, you know, it-- it's--

Hey!

- How's it going?
- Hi!

How-- how'd it-- how'd it go?

Um... yeah, not-- I don't...

Not that great, I don't think.

What? You're kidding!

Yeah.

- [phone ringing]
- I know. I know.

I made you run all those lines
with me again for nothing.

Okay, but no, acting
is never a waste of time.

I was acting. You were acting.
Actors act.

- [phone ringing]
- Well, that's very sweet, Terry.

No, I... I'm being real.

All right, I--
I'm not being sweet,

I'm being sincere.

That choice you made,
when you started whispering

when you were talking
about your mom?

- [phone ringing]
- It gave me goosebumps.

It sounds like your thing
went well, huh?

Well, I don't wanna talk--
Yes! I mean, it went very well.

Well, I-- I wanna
hear all about it.

[Terry] You're just so good,

I don't know how
you're not booking anything.

[phone ringing]

Hello?

Hi, Cheryl.
I have Helen for you.

Terry. I just need one second.

Oh yeah, no problem.

Hey! Sorry I missed your call.

I had a client walk off set.

The director fired a gun.
It's just chaos.

Oh, wow, that's, um...

Yeah, that sounds crazy.

Um, no, I just
walked in the door.

Did they call already?

They loved you.

No, I really
don't think they did, actually.

Well, they thought you weren't
quite right for this one.

So good. So good.

They said you seemed
a little too worldly--

Yeah, I'm-- I'm auditioning
in a couple weeks, I think.

They just weren't sure you were
passionate about the project.

I mean, I am trying,
but, sure, yeah...

I feel like we've been getting
that feedback a lot lately.

Are you still working
with that acting coach?

Can we find you a--

Um... look, Helen.

Yeah, yeah.

Um, I think I can maybe
just beat you to the punch

a little bit here.

Yeah, I'm rambling.
You go ahead.

Mm-hmm. I'm working really hard,

and I'm accomplishing
very little. So...

I'm not really sure
what I'm doing in L.A. anymore.

Oh, lots of people
go through that.

Right. Helen, I can barely
afford my rent.

Hold that thought.

Robin, hand me that. Thank you.

Cheryl, honey...

- Yeah?
- Okay, sweetie.

You know the ABC Studios where
they shoot all those, um--

- Mm-hmm.
- You know the one.

- The stages in the Valley.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Well, I booked you
a guest spot on a TV show!

Wait, really?

Yeah. Yeah, you bet. Friday.

Right. But I didn't audition.

You didn't have to.

I sent them your resume.
They think you're perfect.

Um...

what's the show?

Bachelor #3, if I were
an ice cream sundae,

what flavor
would you want me to be,

and how would you eat me?

Well, if you were my ex-wife,
I'd have to say rocky road.

[laughter]

Um... I need a drink.

I'm a vanilla man myself.

You know, I didn't think
I'd come out here and be famous.

I just... I thought
if I was disciplined...

And I have been.

Yeah! You're locked in your
apartment, running lines.

I can hear you,
most of the time.

I have notes.

[laughing] I have a few notes.

And I haven't even been
on a date in two years,

'cause I didn't want
the distraction.

And now th--

I don't know, Helen...

Helen says it's good
because it'll get me seen,

and Sally Field
was on the show, so...

she's not totally wrong.

But still, it just feels...

Beneath you?

You think I'm being a brat.

No!

It's beneath you, but I still
think it's a good thing.

The show?

No shit.

Why?

Because you're gonna meet
some cheeseball guy,

who you'll spend
all of two minutes with,

and you'll hate,

and then you'll be back here,
right here at the bar,

laughing about it with me.

Why will I hate him?

'Cause he's gonna be a dork!

And you'd rather
be hanging out with me.

- Yes, obviously.
- Obviously.

I mean, you're basically
my only friend out here.

Well... and that's good.

All right, shall we? Another?

Uh, no, I probably shouldn't.

I, you know, got my big break
coming up, so...

I don't wanna look
like garbage for that.

You could never
look like garbage.

You always look beautiful.

That's sweet.

Oh! Oh, my god! Sorry.

[laughing]

That just took me by surprise.

Um, no, that just
tickled for a...

Um...

That just took me by surprise.

Sorry, I'm-- I...
I think I'm a little jumpy.

I had a weird...
pretty weird day.

Yeah, no, I... I get it.

Okay, great.

Do you wanna leave?

No. Um...

No, we should have another one.

[man] Wake up!

Can't stay here.

Let's pack it up.
- Yeah, okay.

Let's keep it moving.

[sports radio playing]

[song playing on radio
while dryers run]

[man] Hey!

We need to keep
this aisle clear.

You can't just sleep here.

Unbelievable.

["Lonely Women"
by Laura Nyro plays]

? Walls that tell you
where you've been ?

? And you've been
to the hollow ?

Oh! Shit, shit, shit, shit.

[man] Hey!

Hey, come back here!

? Whoa, bitter tears ?

? Whoa
bitter tears ?

? Uptight downpour ?

? Don't got no children
to be grandmother for ?

Fucking bitch.

? To be grandmother for ?

? She don't believe no more ?

? She don't believe ?

? No one hurries home ?

? To call you baby ?

[camera shutter snaps]

[shutter snaps]

Can I help you
with something, buddy?

I'm-- I'm sorry.
I-- I didn't mean to...

It... I-- I just saw you
sitting there,

and the light is perfect.

You're beautiful.

What? Did I say something?

Dude, I look pretty fucking
far from beautiful right now.

What are you talking about?

You're gorgeous.

You got this, uh-- like a...

Linda Manz thing going on.

I don't know who that is.

She was in that movie,
uh, Days Of Heaven.

Well, consider me
fucking swooned.

So, you ever done
any modeling before?

Dude, I'm broke as shit.

So whatever you're
trying to sell me--

I'm not trying
to sell you anything.

I'm serious.

There's this photo contest
that I wanna enter,

and I've been looking
for a subject.

I think you'd be perfect for it.

Hold that pose.

What pose?

That pose.

[camera snapping]

Now look over
your left shoulder.

That's your right.
Your other left!

[laughing]

There you go. Now look

right into the lens,
right here,

and give me that look
you just gave me.

Come on. There she is!

[laughs]

Look at you. One more.

You know, Farrah Fawcett,
she's got nothing on you.

So, what do you say?

Lisa?

- Cheryl!
- Hi!

I'm so sorry I'm late.

No, it's fine.

There was an accident
on the 101, and...

You're fine.
You're totally fine.

Do you need anything?
I can get you coffee, water.

Uh, no, thank you.

Have you eaten?
I can get you a bagel?

No, really, I'm fine.

Helen tells me
you're from Pennsylvania.

Um, Allentown, yeah.

Oh, I went to Penn State.

Oh, uh... go, Lady Lions.

Can I get you a water?

Oh, you--
you asked me that already.

Ah. Right through here.

- Great.
- Great.

So, you excited about this?
How you feeling?

Um, good.

Yeah, I think it'll be fun.

[Lisa]
It'll be so fun, I promise.

We're gonna get you through
hair and makeup.

I saw your bachelors
backstage.

You got a good batch.

Oh, really? What are they like?

- They're idiots. All of them.
- [music playing]

I don't know
where they get 'em from.

- From under a rock.
- Right?

Do you remember that one guy
we had on the show?

Um... filmmaker.
- Oh, Jesus Christ!

Oh, my god, he was beautiful.

But I'm telling you,
the IQ of a lug nut.

Oh, it was really too bad.

- You want some?
- No, I'm fine.

So, he shows up with
his identical twin brother,

and he says,
"Oh, I'm making a movie.

We're both acting in it.

I'm the star, but he's playing
my best friend."

[laughing]

His identical twin brother
is playing his best friend!

Like, what the hell
is that about?

- Brilliant!
- I love it!

Oh, god! Is it possible
to get a guy in this town

that isn't a maniac?

[Gretchen] Or a total moron?

Hello? Hey!
How's everybody doing?

Whoa! A room full
of beautiful women.

Hey, let's put
that skunkweed away.

You're gonna get me in trouble.

What's up, Marilyn?
So, this is Cheryl?

Yeah. Hi!

They told me
that you went to Juilliard.

[Cheryl] No.

Well, that's fantastic.

I guess you're a real music
freak, huh?

Do you like this?
You like the sound of this?

[Cheryl] Yeah. It's cool.

[Ed] There you go. See?

Women love that Black sound.

Come on.

Whatever happened
to Tony Bennett?

What happened to Bing Crosby?

I mean, if you want soul,

listen to Perry Como
singing "Moonglow."

Hey, can you do me a favor?

Yeah.

Okay.
You're an intelligent girl.

Anyone can see that.

But when you get
on that stage, though,

I don't want you
to play so smart.

All right?

The guys are getting
intimidated.

You know boys, they're babies.

- Right.
- So-- so just-- that's right.

I just need you to laugh
and smile just over and over.

Can you do that for me?

- Oh. Yeah. Sure. Of course.
- I'd appreciate it.

There you go.
You have a beautiful smile.

Mr. Burke?
Your wife's on the phone.

Okay, thanks. Is this, uh...

is this-- is this the dress
you're wearing?

Yeah! Yeah.

[Ed] Hey, Bruce?

Hey, Bruce, can you hear me?

[Bruce] Yeah.

[Ed] Yeah. Um, can we get her
in something

just a little more flattering?

I mean, she's got the body,
so let's use it.

All right, thank you so much.

[Gretchen] Looks perfect.

[Lisa]
The audience is filling up.

Everyone's getting excited!

Great.

[Gretchen] Looks great.
Um, actually, you know what?

I think we should try the updo.

Yeah, whatever you want.

- I like it down.
- You like it down?

Okay, let's do... let's do down.

Great.

Nice and flowing. Fabulous.

Careful! Smooth it out.
Watch the car.

[Ken] Relax, Mom. It's fine.

This is it?

It doesn't look
like a television studio.

Mom, how would you know?
You've never seen one.

[Laura] Hey, don't talk back
to your mother.

It just looks so drab.

What you see on TV,
all these lights and stages.

[Ken] There's lights inside.
I promise you.

Doesn't it look drab to you?

Should we grab the umbrellas?
I think it's gonna rain.

It's gonna rain?
Come on, let's hurry it up!

[chuckling]

How you holding up?

I don't know.

I'm feeling a little... drab.

You know, on TV,

they have all those
big lights and stages.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So, what do you think?

It's great.

Awesome.

We're ready for you.

Okay.

All right, everybody!
Let's get started.

Fine to start
without the live feed.

[audience applauds]

Yeah, it's fine. Good to go.

Okay, they're ready backstage.

Live from
the Chuck Barris stages

in Hollywood, California,

it's The Dating Game!

And now, your host, Ed Burke!

[cheering]

Oh, thank you so much.

Thank you so much.
You're too kind.

Welcome back
to The Dating Game.

I'm your host, Ed Burke,

and we're absolutely thrilled
you're all joining us tonight.

And who knows?

Will today be the day
that sparks fly?

All right, Ed's
just doing his intro now.

As soon as he's done, we--

[Cheryl] Wait, he's...
he's on right now?

- Mm-hmm.
- Okay.

Oh! Just watch
your step here, be careful...

[Ed] Now, this is a program
which brings together...

[Lisa] Over here now.
Stop, stop, stop.

[Ed]
...and one very pretty girl.

- [applause]
- Okay.

[Ed]...we give her a chance
to question the gentlemen...

Okay, now,
you're just around here.

- Okay.
- Up these steps.

Great. And then what?
I'm just on?

Mm-hmm. You okay?

Uh-huh.

Great! Have fun!

[Ed]...how we play the game.
Come with me!

Now, before we meet
our three eligible bachelors,

I think we should meet
our lovely bachelorette.

I had the chance
to meet her backstage,

and let me tell you,
she is ready for a connection.

Sally Field.
Sally Field. Sally Field.

Ladies and gentlemen,
welcome the woman of the hour...

Cheryl!

Shit!

[theme music playing]

[applause]

[Cheryl panting]

[woman] I gotta get out of here.

Somewhere I can see the sky.

I can't wait.

No, the place is great!

It's coming together.

I'm still seeing you
this weekend, right?

[chuckling] Yeah, well,

you'd better, 'cause
you're in the dog house now.

[laughing]

Shit!

[humming]

[door buzzer ringing]

[door buzzer ringing]

[door buzzer ringing]

[truck door closes]

Shit!

Sorry! Coming!

Coming!

Hey, hey!

Hey, is this for 2A?

[man] It is.

Okay, great! I'll let you in.

We've been ringing the apartment
for ten minutes!

Sorry, I was in the shower.
I didn't hear it.

Tommy, let's go!

What?

You're just gonna
leave it all out here?

[man] Wish we could help,
but we have a schedule to keep.

[engine starting]

Hey, Ansel Adams!

It's, like, the last thing.

[man] Yeah? It better be.

[woman] Yeah. I think it is.

Okay...

Almost.

Okay.

You want a beer?

You've never heard
of Roman Polanski?

He's the doorman
at the Ice Palace, right?

No, no, no, no! No.

Big guy with the tattoos?

No, no, he's a short guy

who directed Repulsion
and Rosemary's Baby...

Are those movies, or--?

What do you mean?
You're killing me!

I'm trying to name-drop here.
- Drop away, man!

No, because you don't know
who I'm talking about,

so it's not as impressive.

[laughing]

You're fucking with me.

Have I seen Rosemary's Baby?

Come on!

What? I-- I don't know.

Maybe-- maybe you don't like
scary movies.

I don't like scary movies,

but I've seen
Rosemary's fucking Baby!

Okay. So, I took a class
with him at NYU. All right?

With Roman Polanski, I mean.

And... and that's... that's it.
That's all I wanted to say.

Very impressive.

Do you feel better now?

Uh, you still go there?

I just graduated.

Congratulations!

That's amazing!

Uh, so what now?

I'm off to, uh,
New Hampshire, actually.

Yeah.

I'm gonna be teaching kids
photography.

[woman] Very cool.

Yeah.

You know, it's crazy.

It's my last day here...

and-- and I meet you.

Like, it's so hard
to meet people, you know,

that you can connect with,

so when I do, I just...

I like to savor
the moment, you know?

Yeah.

Yeah, no, I'm...
I'm the same way.

Hey, so, I should probably
get this shit together.

I mean, this place is a mess.

I have to get unpacking.

It's, like such a disaster.

I don't know where anything
is gonna go.

It's, I don't know, insane,

but thank you so much
for your help.

It's very...
very, very useful, so...

So, you said
you were a stewardess?

Uh, yeah.

What's that like?

Well, I get to get groped
by sweaty businessmen

while putting things
in the overhead,

so what's not to love?

[laughs] But it--
but, no, it is great.

I mean, I get to see the world
and travel for free, and...

I mean, I get to go
to Egypt next week.

I've always wanted
to go to Egypt,

so I'm very excited.

I think at first,

I was afraid
that I was gonna get lonely,

being away from home,

but my airline is amazing--

Can I take your picture?

[yelling, glass breaking]

[panting and screaming]

[head thumping the floor]

[coughing]

[coughing]

[gasping]

[applause]

[Ed] There she is.

What a beauty.
Come on down here, darling.

Come on down.

There we go. You can
stand right there for me.

Cheryl is an aspiring actress
from Scranton, Pennsylvania.

She used to work massaging feet,

but quit when her boss
asked her to work her way up.

She moved here from L.A.
after graduating college,

and now is hoping
to find a Romeo

to compliment her Juliet.

My goodness, you are a beauty.
What a knockout.

How are you doing, Cheryl?

Uh, doing well.

Okay, fantastic. Are you ready
to get this party started?

Yeah!

Okay, well, let the games begin.

[applause]

All right. Now, the rules
of the game are simple.

There are three bachelors
behind this partition.

You can ask them
whatever you'd like,

except their name, age,
or occupation.

When this game is over,
you simply pick which one

you'd like to go out with.
Sound good?

Great!

Eight camera,
get ready for snap zoom.

Hi, Cheryl.

Pleased to make
your, uh, pleasure.

Uh, no, I mean, I... uh,
pleasure to meet your, um...

[Ed] Save that talk
for the date.

[Bachelor] Pleasure
to make your acquaintance.

There we go.
Third time's a charm.

Bachelor #2?

Hello, Cheryl!

Hello, hello, hello.

If you wanna groove,
pick number two.

[Cheryl] Oh, my god,
is he stuck like that?

[Ed] We'll have to find out.

And would you please say hello
to Cheryl, Bachelor #3?

Lights up on number three.

We're gonna have a great time
together, Cheryl.

[Ed] Oh, he's confident.

Well, now that you know
what they sound like,

are you ready to take it
to the next step?

I think I am!

- Do you have your question set?
- Sure do!

All right, let's take a seat
and make yourself comfortable,

and here we go!

[applause]

[director] Jesus, Ed.
Okay, kill the "applause" sign.

[applause]

[applause fades]

Bachelor #1,
we're in a drama class,

and it's the big audition.

You're a nerdy school boy
asking me out on a date.

Take it away!

Uh...

Hey.

]

I'm a...

You know, I'm a--
I'm a nerdy school boy.

Do you wanna go on a date?

Is that it?

[Bachelor] Yeah.

[Ed] Well, we got a genius.

[director] Pan to number two.

[Cheryl] Simple.
I like it, Bachelor #1.

Um, Bachelor #2, you're the
captain of the football team.

Go.

[Bachelor] Hey there, Peggy Sue.

Hey, you okay?

Yeah, I'm fine.

[Bachelor] I was thinking
if you weren't doing nothing,

maybe we could play
a game of touch football.

I'd be shirts, you'd be skins.

[Cheryl] I don't know,
that sounds awfully rough.

[Bachelor] Rough and rowdy.
That's the way I like it, babe.

[applause]

Bachelor #3, you're
the accomplished professor.

Go for it.

Young lady, I'm gonna need you
to stay after class

and have a word with me.

Oh! Do you need
to teach me a lesson?

Yes. Yes, I do.

In fact, you're gonna have
to bend over...

backwards with dedication.

[laughter]

[applause]

[Cheryl]
Okay... um, Bachelor #1.

If I served you for dinner,
what would you be?

[Bachelor] Uh, I am the buffet.

[laughter]

I gotta get out of here.

Right now?
It's the middle of the show.

I gotta go to the bathroom.

Is everything okay?

- Stop.
- Let me go.

[Cheryl] Uh, Bachelor #2?

[Bachelor] Oh, I'm the big old
green salad,

with the vinaigrette
on the side,

because I like things undressed.

[laughter]

Uh, that's funny.

Bachelor #1...

[tripping]

[crashing]

Oh! What was that?

Jesus, what the fuck was that?

Guys, what was that?

Was that part of the show?

What do we do? Just--?

Somebody down there
get Ed's attention.

Ed. Ed!

Ed! Say something!

Uh, well, ladies and gentlemen,

that is the end of round one,

and I think we're
going to hear from our sponsors.

We'll be right back.

Go to commercial.
Go to two! Go to two!

What the fuck was that?

Okay, everyone,
we're re-setting!

Someone clean that up!

So, baby, you're doing amazing.

Just knocking it
out of the park, seriously.

Oh, great.

Hey, the magic
of television, huh?

While we got some time,

who's here
from out of town, huh?

Hollywood? First time? Oh!

Bet you didn't think
it was gonna be that exciting.

[laughter]

[man] Just clean this up.

[Lisa] That's not my job.

It's okay, I'm your boss.

Okay. Fine.

[gasping]

[whimpering]

Dammit!

[screaming]

They want to make an adjustment.

I don't think
that's gonna work for you.

Um, do you know where--

He's probably somewhere upstairs
holding court.

[Rodney] Yeah, I met her at, uh,
Warren Beatty's house.

[man] "Warren Beatty's house."
Listen to this fucking guy.

[laughter]

Hey, uh, Rodney?

Uh, this is the new guy, uh--
Mario, right?

Yeah. Yeah.

And her parents
let you take this?

Let me? They paid me.

No.

I can see it. Your big break.
That's how the industry works.

Yeah, I know how it works.

Usually for drugs.

Oh... oh, what, you think
they hold them down?

They force-feed them
more drugs?

He did rape a kid.

Oh, Joe says he would.

Everyone would do drugs.

She's 13!

Yeah, but-- I mean, come on.

Girls these days...

[Rodney] You know, I...

I took that one in Malibu
a few weeks ago.

Yeah, it's nice.

I was just thinking maybe
going there later today.

I usually find my subject
on the beach,

but I feel like you'd look great
in that light,

so, you know,
if you're around...

Yeah. Yeah.

I mean, I'm not-- I'm not busy.

You're not busy.

I'm free whenever.

[woman] What was she doing there
in the first place?

Rod. Rod!

Yeah?

Some people
are here to see you.

Yeah? Who? Warren Beatty?
[laughter]

It's the police.

Oh, yeah, no, um... my place--

it was jacked last week, so...

You know, some of
the camera equipment was lost.

They're probably just following
up on that, you know?

All right,
I'll see you guys later.

Party's over.

Yeah, okay. Okay, good night.

[chuckling]

[laughter]

Yeah. Uh...

Yeah, you know, we always gotta
check these things out.

Hey, you're just
doing your job.

Sorry for the misunderstanding.

It's okay. Thank you guys, yeah?

Appreciate it.

[whispers] Were you here
a couple months ago?

The police thought he did it.

There's always been something
wrong with that guy.

I don't want to say this,
but I-- I--

[slamming counter] Fuck!

[turning water on]

[thump]

Hey.

Uh, so-- um... later...

I can't, 'cause they actually
want me to stay late,

because I... I...
there's, like, nobody here.

Short on staff.

Um...

Another time?

Yeah.

I'll find someone else.

Okay.

Uh... sorry.

[door opens and closes]

[breathing hard]

Allison! [knocking]

Al, are you in there?

Hey, Al, I've been calling
for a while,

and I'm-- I'm just a little
worried about you.

Okay, I'm-- I'm going to get
the spare now.

I'm coming in, okay?

If you're in there,
I'm coming in.

No, it's all good!
It's all good.

Excuse me!

We're working here.

What'd I tell ya? Lug nuts.

How am I doing?

You're great. Fabulous.

What is it?

What's the matter?

Oh, nothing. Nothing. Um...

I'm trying to do what Ed said.

Just feels a little weird,
that's all.

Oh, fuck Ed.

I mean, no disrespect,
but fuck him.

This isn't a sitcom.

You're not coming back
next week.

Oh, Omaha! Love that place.

What's Ed gonna do?

Fire you? [laughing]

You're supposed
to be having fun.

That's the whole point.

So just be yourself.

Say whatever you want.

Um, do either of you have a pen?

- Yeah. Here you go.
- Gretchen does.

Thank you.

She looks fine.

She's gorgeous. Yeah.

Ugh, look at those guys.

Thank you.

Don't mind if I do.

No, thanks.

[sighing] Too small.

Seriously, anything
under a C cup...

can't do it.

What about her?

What about her?

You haven't seen her yet.

What if she's petite?

I'll let her blow me.

[laughs]

No, you won't.

I won't?

And why's that?

Because I always get the girl.

Guys all set down there?

Check in with Matthew
and see how close we are?

He says he just needs
30 seconds.

Okay, camera, come on.

We're up and running.

In place, everyone!

Ladies,
stop messing with her hair.

I know
you're barely touching her.

We're ready for you,
Mr. Burke.

Okay, don't let that
throw you. You got this.

Okay, Mr. Burke.

Okay, you guys good?
You need anything? Okay, great!

We're on.

Laura! Are you okay?

Hey.

[Laura] I know Bachelor #3.

Oh.

Did you date him or something?

No, I didn't date him. He...

Do you
remember my friend, Allison?

The one who was--

Oh, yeah.

I remember
you talking about her.

[Laura] And there was
that guy at the beach, and...

I... shouldn't
have left her there. I...

I told her to be careful,

and I knew that there was
something wrong.

I knew something was off
about that guy.

You gave his description
to the police.

Yeah. That's the guy.

Bachelor #3?

Um...

How-- how sure are you?

I'm pretty sure.

Pretty sure?

Like, 90%.

But you're not positive.

I'm just saying this guy might
look really similar, right?

I'm not saying that I don't
believe you, Laura.

I'm just...

I mean, if this guy
did what you're implying,

then wouldn't he be in jail
and not on a TV show?

I don't know. I, um--

I mean, it's a big TV show.

You don't think
they vet their contestants?

]

Maybe it is the guy, right?

And maybe the police,
they looked into him,

and they cleared him.

Look, I love you.

And I'm really sorry
that you lost your friend.

It must feel like
he's around every corner.

I can't even imagine. But...

I'm just not sure
what you want me to do--

Get out.

What?

Get out.

- Laura--
- Now!

Okay, everyone!
Here we go! Look alive!

We're back into it in five...

four... three...

two...

[applause]

[Ed] All right. Welcome back
to The Dating Game.

Thank you for bearing through
that, uh, technical difficulty,

but let's get back to the show.

Cheryl, the floor is yours.

Take it away.

Bachelor #1.

Einstein said that sitting
on a hot stove for a minute

feels like an hour,

but sitting next to a nice girl
for an hour

feels like a minute.

That was his theory
of special relativity.

What's yours?

Um...

what?

I'll come back to you on that.

Wait, hold on. Was that
the actual question?

Bachelor #2, when you invite
a girl out for dinner,

what do you expect in return?

[audience oohing]

Uh, I guess that depends
on the meal.

Are we talking
filet mignon, or what?

That's a good question. Are we?

Yeah, sure. I'm a generous guy.

Good to know.

Are these the scripted
questions?

And since I'm spending
an arm and a leg on dinner,

I'd like to think that she could
at least provide the dessert.

Oh, and what would you
order for dessert?

Oh, you know...

No, I don't. Tell me.

[laughter]

[Bachelor] Something hot.

Like cherries flambé?

Yeah! Yeah, with lots
of whipped cream.

Sorry, I'm on a diet.

Bachelor #1, how's that theory
of special relativity

coming along?
- Hmm?

Groovy. Keep at it.

Bachelor #3,
what's the difference

between a boy and a man?

A boy thinks
that buying a woman dinner

means she owes him something.

[gasping]

Okay. And what does a man think?

Well, for starters,

he knows better than
to start talking about dessert

before he's made it
through dinner.

[applause]

[Cheryl] That's not bad.

Bachelor #1, any luck?

Keep up, she's going back
to the genius thing.

I... I can't.

[Ed] Okay, should I--

should I be taking notes,
teacher? Or...?

[Cheryl] Oh! It will be
on the final exam, Ed.

- [audience laughs]
- That's good.

Bachelor #3,
your buddy's drawing a blank.

Do you wanna help him out?

With his theory
of special relativity?

Yeah.

Whether it's for a minute
or for an hour,

I like to sit relatively close
to a special girl

whenever I get the chance.

How's that?

That's pretty good.

That's not bad.
- [applause]

[door closing]

[applause]

Bachelor #1, I threw you
a curve ball last time.

I'll say.

I didn't know I, uh,

I needed to be an astrologer
to be on this show.

Do you mean an astronomer?

Is there a difference?

Do you want there to be?

Um... no?

By the way,
Einstein was a physicist,

not an astronomer.
It doesn't matter.

Are you gonna ask me
a question?

I just asked you two, but sure.

Bachelor #1, in "The Groundwork
of the Metaphysics of Morals,"

Immanuel Kant argues--

She's gonna give him
a heart attack.

I don't...

I'm kidding.
Bachelor #1, I'm kidding!

I'm just having fun with you.

Bachelor #1,
this is nice and easy.

What are girls for?

Uh, what do you mean?

Just what I said,
what are girls for?

Geez, you're getting edgy
with this one.

Oh! Do you wanna go back
to Immanuel Kant?

No, no, no. I can do this.

Good to hear it.
I believe in you, Bachelor #1.

Thank you.

Uh...

girls are for...

guys... and, you know,
having fun with.

Well, Gloria Steinem
would be proud.

Being a little hard on
the boys, aren't you, Cheryl?

Oh, I think
we're all having fun.

Oh, of course we are.

- Aren't we having fun?
- [applause]

[Cheryl laughs]

See? We're having so much fun.

Bachelor #2.

What are girls for?

Uh, why does this
feel like a trap?

I don't know. Why does it?

Well, because if I say girls
are for wining and dining,

then I sound like a jerk.

And if I say they're for,
respecting or whatever,

then I just sound like a schmuck
looking to get laid.

Okay. Bachelor #2, I think
you answered my question.

Ah, hey, wait. No.

I-- I didn't mean it like that.

[Cheryl] Moving on!

Bachelor #3.

I'm counting on you.

What are girls for?

[man] I, no.

No, I-- I...

No one's beating Ali twice.

I don't think so.

Uh, Jim, gimme a second.

Can I help you with something?

Um, I need to speak with
someone on The Dating Game.

If you want tickets
to the show,

you need to go
to Guest Relations.

Go back down the same hallway
you came, take a right.

Yeah, I don't wanna
see the show.

I just came from there.

I need to speak with someone
who works on it,

like a producer or something.

What for?

There's someone on the show
right now

who shouldn't be there.

Who shouldn't be there.
Your boyfriend?

No.

Husband?

Last year, a friend of mine
was raped and murdered,

and the police never...

I think
that the guy that killed her

is up on that stage right now,

Bachelor #3,

and this is
a very dangerous man,

so can you just
call someone for me?

Please?

Hey, Jim, I'm gonna have
to call you back.

Yeah.

[Rodney] What are girls for?

[Cheryl] Yeah, that's right.

I guess I'd have to say
that that's up to the girl.

[applause]

That's a very good answer.

Oh, yeah, we love that.

[applause]

Um...

Bachelor #3, I have
a follow-up question.

Shoot.

Well, you've been with
the other bachelors

for a while now.

Uh, we-- we've talked
for a bit, yeah.

Okay.

Tell me, what's
the most disgusting thing

Bachelors 1 and 2 have said
or done backstage?

Besides coming on this show,
of course.

- [audience laughs]
- That's good.

[Rodney] Oh, gosh. Um...

Uh, that's a tough one.

If I'm being honest,

um, Bachelor #1 didn't really
say anything disgusting.

That's, uh--
that's true, I didn't.

And what about Bachelor #2?

Um...

I can't repeat it
word for word,

as how we're on television
and all, but...

[Ed chuckles]

...he had some thoughts
about bra sizes

being a prerequisite
for a meaningful relationship.

Oh, is that right?

Aw, darn it.

That signals
the end of our game.

Well, Cheryl, it's time
to make a decision.

- [Bachelor #2 protesting]
- Throw to commercial.

[Ed]...analyze what you heard,

and while Cheryl
makes her decision,

we're gonna take a little time

for you to make a decision about
the very fine products--

I'll have you wait
in the office here,

and someone
will be with you shortly.

[Laura] Uh, who?

George Elliott,
the series producer.

You can have a seat
if you like.

He'll be able to help you.

Good luck.

Thank you.

Really.

[door opening]

And we'll be right back.

And we're out.

[bell ringing]

Once this show is over,
I want this cunt out of here.

I never wanna see
her fucking face again.

[Lisa]
I know. I'm so sorry, sir.

[Marilyn]
So, who you gonna pick?

Mm.

[Gretchen] Oh, knock it off.

What? I'm just asking.

Do you think I went too far?

I think he thinks
you went to far.

[Gretchen] He thinks
everything is too far.

Yeah, but do you, though?

Honey, I've been on this show
since 1968,

and I've seen more idiots
flirting back and forth

than I can count.

The one thing I've learned is,

no matter what words they use,

the question beneath
the question remains the same.

All right...

what's the question?

"Which one of you
will hurt me?"

You just asked it
clearer than most.

Hey, man. What the fuck?

Why would you tell her that?

She asked.

Fuck you.

You know what?
Soon as this show's over,

you and me,
we're gonna have words.

Is that right?

Well, what if I don't show?

You gonna hire somebody
to track me down?

Fucking pussy.

You know what?
I have a better idea.

Why don't we swap
contact information

so we know where
to find each other?

Hmm.

Okay. Yeah.

Stocker Street, Glendale.

Yeah, I know where that is.

Here.

Oh, Jesus!
What the fuck is that, man?

It's fake.

Fucking weirdo.

Yeah?

[door opening]

All right, folks!
Everyone in place!

[bell ringing]

[Ed] That's enough.
Come on, let's get out of here.

Let's move this chair.
Get up. Get up, Cheryl.

We've had an entire commercial
break to get rid of this.

Come on. Go, go, go.
Here, you. You're right there.

- And five... four...
- Go. Go.

- Three... two...
- Boys are babies, right?

[chuckling]

Welcome back to
The Dating Game.

Cheryl, you have played
this game beautifully,

but now it is time
to make a decision.

Our bachelors were cool,
candid, sharp,

and, uh, patient,

but only one of them
can get the date.

Will it be Bachelor #1,

Bachelor #2, or Bachelor #3?

Cheryl, who is the lucky guy?

Number three!

Number three! My, my, my!

Let me ask you, Cheryl,

what about number three
appealed to you the most?

He knows what girls are for.

[Ed] He knows
what girls are for.

Now, before
we meet Bachelor #3,

let me introduce you to
Bachelor #1 from Sherman Oaks.

He is a medical intern,

and desires
to own his own practice.

His hobbies include
reading and golf.

Please welcome Josh Young.

- Hi. It's nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.

A wonderful job. Marvelous job.

Bachelor #2 is a furniture
designer from Glendale

who enjoys Frisbee and dancing.

Cheryl, please meet Arnie Aslan.

[Arnie]
Careful with that asshole.

All right. Thank you, gentlemen.

We have some very fine
parting gifts for you

right out this way.

Now it is time
to come face to face

with the bachelor
you did choose,

but first, I'd like to tell you
a little bit about him.

Bachelor #3 hails
from the great state of Texas.

He's a skydiver,
into motorcycling,

and is a fine photographer.

Please welcome Rodney Alcala!

[applause]

- Hi, how are you?
- Nice to meet you.

Nice to meet you.

It's so nice to meet you.

[Ed] Well, you did it, Rod.

You offered some great answers
to some very tricky questions,

and you got the girl.

Thanks, Ed.

Rodney and Cheryl,
pack your bags,

because you're going on
an all-expense-paid trip

to Carmel, California!

Thank you for joining us,

and we'll see you next time
on The Dating Game.

And we're out!

[Lisa] Cheryl, sweetie!
This way.

Oh! Watch your step here.

Just through this door, okay.

[vacuum running]

Excuse me?

[turning vacuum off]

Hi. I'm sorry to bother you.

Um...

I'm supposed to meet with
someone named George Elliott.

He's a producer.

I beg your pardon?

George Elliott.

He's an executive producer
on The Dating Game.

Do you know
where I could find him?

It's very important
that I speak with him.

I doubt that very much.

Why?

Because I'm George Elliott.

What?

Lemme guess...

the security guard out front,
he set this up, yeah?

He is a real asshole, all right.

Excuse me.

If there's something I can do,
I'd be happy to try and--

[door closing]

[Lisa] Thank you so much again.
Did you have fun?

- Um... yeah, I had a lot of--
- Oh, good, right this way.

- This way? Okay. Got it.
- Yeah. Out here. Okay.

[Cheryl] I thought
it went really well.

[Lisa] I think so too.

All right. Now, safe travels.

We'll be in touch.

Thank you so much.

[door slams]

[Rodney] Cheryl?

Hi! Hey...

I lost you back there.

Yeah! I looked for you
after I changed,

but... that was crazy.

The whole thing
was crazy.

[laughing]

They showed me on stage,

the lights went on,
and... here we go.

Yeah!

Yeah.

It was kinda fun.

I mean, it was
evil and soul-crushing,

but... I had a little fun.

Yeah.

But, yeah.

Uh... I guess
I'll see you in Carmel.

[laughing]

I mean... do you wanna
go somewhere now?

[Amy] No fucking way.
This is beautiful.

Hey! [exhaling]

You want some?

Hell, yeah.

Man, who woulda thought

that I'd find the love
of my life today, huh?

[coughing]

Don't make me fucking laugh,
you asshole.

Take it easy.

[coughing]

Is that your stuff?

Yeah. That's some of my work.

Let's see
what I'm working with.

Wow.

These are, um...

I won $500 with that one.

No shit?

Yep.

All right, well,
enough of this crap.

Why don't you spill it out?

Where you from?

Why do you wanna know?

Why are you not telling me?

Maybe because I didn't
fucking like it there.

Ah, okay.

So you're a runaway.

Oh, my god.

You make me sound like
I'm Oliver fucking Twist.

[laughing]

I'm independent.

Your folks...
they must be worried.

Pammy's too loaded
to worry about anything.

What about your dad?
Where's he at?

Who knows?

He took off when I was a kid.

That must have been tough.

You know, growing up
without him.

Oh, please.

When did your dad
walk out on you?

Did you make it
to eighth grade?

Did you ever try to find him?

[quiet laugh] No.

I'm afraid I'd kill him.

It's amazing
how one selfish asshole

can fuck up your entire life.

Here.

What is this?

It's chocolate.

What's it for?

It's Valentine's Day.

You're my Valentine.

That looks pretty far.

[Rodney] It's not,
it's just up that hill.

Hill?

Wearing comfortable shoes?

Yeah.

Good! 'Cause you'll need 'em.

You ready?

- Yeah.
- All right. Follow me.

[Rodney] Almost there.

Sun's going down.

[Amy]
Where do you want me to stand?

[Rodney] Just keep going.

Over by the rock.

[Amy] This one?

[Rodney] Just keep going.

Yeah, right by the edge.

Yeah, that's nice.

[camera snapping]

Now turn around
and face the light.

Yeah, that's beautiful.

You're a natural.

All right, just one more.

Now look up
straight to the sky.

Did you get the shot?

Rodney?

[glass breaking]

Oh, my god. Where are we?

What is this place?

I don't know, but you know
this is what happens

when a pretty girl like yourself

tells me to duck into
the first place I find.

Oh, my god.

I thought it looked normal
from the outside.

What are you reading?

Oh, uh... uh, Cowboy Mouth.

It's this play.

Sam Shepard. Patti Smith.
Yeah. Hmm.

I saw the, uh--
the original run.

- Really?
- Mm-hmm.

So you lived in New York?

Yeah. NYU.

Columbia!

Mm.

I probably passed you
on the subway.

Mm... I think
I would remember you.

Um...

"Sometimes it's necessary to go
a long distance out of the way

in order to come back
a short distance correctly."

Is that Cowboy Mouth? Or...?

Oh, no. The Zoo Story.

Ah! That's right.

Oh, my god.

It's such a...
a beautiful piece.

- Oh, you know it?
- Yeah, yeah.

Yeah!

Yeah, Albee's
an incredible writer.

He is. He's, um...
he's a genius.

You know, he's actually--
he's one of my favorites.

Wow, you know your stuff.

Um... anyway, there's a...

a production of Cowboy Mouth
that's going up at The Odyssey,

so I'm auditioning
in-- in, like, a week.

- [other patrons leaving]
- Cool.

Well, I can't wait
to see you in that.

Yeah, I don't have the part yet.

Nah, it's in the bag.

Oh, yeah? You think so?

Yeah, for sure!
I mean, you have this, like...

Patti Smith
vibration thing going on.

[laughs]

That's sweet.
I could not have less

of a Patti Smith
vibration going on.

I'm not talking
about this.

I'm talking about... soul.

You know?

[laughing] Okay.

That's very far out.

[laughing]

I mean, it's...

I think that's good.

That's good. I'm into that.

[he puts his glass down hard]

I'm probably making this
harder than it has to be.

I don't date much.

I don't date at all, actually.

But you decided to go
to The Dating Game.

Yeah, that's funny. Um...

My agent said
it would get me seen.

"It's good exposure.
It'll get you seen."

Did you feel seen?

I felt looked at.

And how do you feel right now?

Fine.

Fine.

You know, most people
don't like to be seen.

They're afraid.

Because you have to be
comfortable with yourself.

You have to stop performing.

Mm.

I never hide who I am.

Excuse me, ma'am?

Can you give us another round?

We had the Mai Tais.

Sorry, you missed last call.

We're just closing up.

That's a shame.

Well, I guess, uh, we'll have
to get out of here then, huh?

[chuckling]

You park back at the lot?

Yeah.

I'll walk with you.

What's your number?

I figure we have to connect
before we go to Carmel, so...

Oh, yeah. That makes sense.

Something wrong?

No.

Thanks.

Good night.

Hey!

Can you tell me your number?

- I just gave it to you.
- I know. I know.

I just... wanna make sure
I have the right one.

You know, sometimes, the 4s,
they kinda look like 9s.

Right.

Um...

yeah, just...
...just let me see it, and I--

You can't repeat it from memory?

So I guess this means

we're not really meeting up
in Carmel anymore?

Yeah, I'm not going
anywhere with you.

All right.

Fair enough.

Maybe I'll see you around.

Yeah, maybe.

You're gonna get
your fucking head bashed in.

What?

[her breathing quickens]

Fuck.

[keys jingle]

Okay. Fuck.

Fuck.

Get your fucking hand
off my car.

[door rumbling]

[conversations spill out]

[gasping]

[panting]

[starting her car]

[driving]

Fuck.

[children laughing]

So great. Uh, Sara!
Can you save that for later?

Thanks.

Really good.

Really good. Try one more.

[unlocking door]

Hi.

[sighs]

You ready?

Uh, yeah, I did...

I did file a report,
in December of last year,

and I don't know
what else to tell--

This man, he was on
national television--

Look, I don't know who you
spoke with. All right?

I don't know
who I spoke with either!

How many ti--

forget it.

Do your fucking job!

Fuck!

[woman] Uh, ma'am...

Sorry. I'm go-- I'm going.

Cheryl, sweetie, I think
you're making a mistake.

Well, I can
appreciate that, Helen.

Right now, MGM is looking
for an unknown brunette

for this big thriller
they've got,

and they do wanna
see a swimsuit photo

before you can audition--

Yeah, I'm not gonna do that.

Well, see if they
can make an exception.

No, not just this audition,
just all of it.

Cheryl, don't be the girl
who's on one stupid TV show

and was never seen again.

You're better than that.

[laughing] Yeah, I-- I know.

Uh, listen, I'm really sorry
that it didn't work out,

and I appreciate everything,
I really do.

Um...

Bye, Helen.

I just, um...

Okay.

[Cheryl] Uh, this is everything,
so we're good to go.

[Rodney crying]

Look what I did.

[sobbing]

[Rodney sobbing]

Hey.

Hey, are you okay?

I guess things got
pretty crazy last night.

Do you think that
you could do me a favor?

Do you think that you could not
tell anyone about this?

Please?

I would just be
so fucking embarrassed.

You know how judgmental
people can be.

Thank you.

So... do you wanna
go back to your place?

Okay.

Cool.

Can you help me with these?

Someone knows
how to tie a knot.

Something tells me
you were a boy scout.

[her car door closing]

Hey, um...

I just wanted to say, um...

I'm sorry if I was rough
with you back there.

It's okay, baby.

Everything's okay.

[starting the car]

[turning the engine off]

I'm gonna take a leak.

You want something?

I'm okay.

Okay.

[turning water on]

[sirens approaching]

[sirens approaching]

[police cars stopping]

[police yelling]

[police and Rodney screaming]

[handcuffing him]

Tony, call for backup!

Get the cuffs on him.
- Get your hands off of me!

Hold his legs down!
Stop resisting!

- Don't do this!
- Stop resisting!

We're at marker 112.
We need assistance.

I got him, I got him!

Okay, take a breath!

He's... he's done.

[gasping]

[???]