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1
00:00:31,953 --> 00:00:33,872
[BALL BOUNCING]
2
00:00:58,314 --> 00:00:59,633
Michael?
3
00:01:02,714 --> 00:01:05,593
What are you doing out here, son?
It's after midnight.
4
00:01:05,754 --> 00:01:07,193
MICHAEL:
Couldn't sleep, Pops.
5
00:01:07,354 --> 00:01:10,193
Well, neither can we,
with all that noise you're making.
6
00:01:10,354 --> 00:01:11,514
Come on, let's go inside.
7
00:01:12,114 --> 00:01:13,994
Just one more shot?
8
00:01:14,154 --> 00:01:15,553
[CHUCKLES]
9
00:01:15,714 --> 00:01:17,834
All right. Just one.
10
00:01:17,994 --> 00:01:19,434
Yeah.
11
00:01:20,634 --> 00:01:21,634
[JAMES CHUCKLES]
12
00:01:21,795 --> 00:01:24,194
That's good. Shoot it again.
13
00:01:27,755 --> 00:01:31,114
Getting pretty good, son.
Go ahead, shoot till you miss.
14
00:01:31,275 --> 00:01:33,514
You think if I can get good enough,
I can go to college?
15
00:01:33,675 --> 00:01:34,674
Hey...
16
00:01:36,595 --> 00:01:40,074
...if you get good enough,
you can do anything you want to, Michael.
17
00:01:40,835 --> 00:01:43,154
I want to play at North Carolina.
18
00:01:44,915 --> 00:01:46,954
That's a real fine school.
Real fine school.
19
00:01:47,115 --> 00:01:49,195
You can get a first-class education there.
20
00:01:49,356 --> 00:01:51,715
I want to play on a championship team.
21
00:01:52,636 --> 00:01:55,154
Then I want to play in the NBA.
22
00:01:57,516 --> 00:01:59,915
[CHUCKLING]
All right, let's slow down, son.
23
00:02:00,076 --> 00:02:02,235
Don't you think you ought
to get a little sleep first?
24
00:02:02,396 --> 00:02:04,115
- And once I've done all that...
- Uh-huh.
25
00:02:04,276 --> 00:02:06,435
...I want to play baseball,
just like you, Dad.
26
00:02:06,596 --> 00:02:09,396
Baseball. Now, that's a sport.
27
00:02:09,556 --> 00:02:13,356
And when you're finished with that,
I suppose you're gonna fly, huh?
28
00:02:35,997 --> 00:02:37,676
[CROWD CHEERING]
29
00:05:37,683 --> 00:05:39,442
MICHAEL:
I just feel at this particular time...
30
00:05:39,603 --> 00:05:43,282
...that I reached the, uh, pinnacle of
my basketball career and I must retire.
31
00:05:43,443 --> 00:05:44,402
[MURMURING]
32
00:05:44,563 --> 00:05:47,883
The one good thing that comes out of this
is that my father had the opportunity...
33
00:05:48,043 --> 00:05:51,563
...to see me play my last basketball game,
and that means a lot to me.
34
00:05:51,724 --> 00:05:53,363
MALE REPORTER:
What are you gonna do now?
35
00:05:53,523 --> 00:05:57,562
Well, I've never really told anybody this,
except for one person, and, uh...
36
00:05:57,724 --> 00:05:59,683
But I think I'm gonna go play
professional baseball.
37
00:05:59,843 --> 00:06:00,842
[MURMURING]
38
00:06:01,004 --> 00:06:04,323
- What position will you play?
- I don't know. As a kid, I was a pitcher.
39
00:06:04,484 --> 00:06:08,563
I think that would be kind of hard for me
to pitch, so I'm gonna play the outfield.
40
00:06:51,005 --> 00:06:52,724
[SCREAMING]
41
00:06:55,125 --> 00:06:56,725
KID:
Woo-hoo!
42
00:06:58,646 --> 00:07:00,685
Let's get out of here, Dad. This stinks.
43
00:07:00,846 --> 00:07:02,725
Don't bring me here anymore, all right?
44
00:07:02,886 --> 00:07:06,045
- Don't bring me here anymore, all right?
SWACKHAMMER: Are you listening?
45
00:07:06,205 --> 00:07:10,805
Did you hear him? Did you hear him?
That little brat is right.
46
00:07:10,966 --> 00:07:13,204
I've told you, if I've told you once...
47
00:07:13,366 --> 00:07:17,445
...I told you a thousand, thousand,
thousand, thousand times.
48
00:07:17,606 --> 00:07:19,525
We need new attractions.
49
00:07:19,926 --> 00:07:20,885
- Right.
- New ones.
50
00:07:21,046 --> 00:07:22,045
Uh-huh.
51
00:07:22,206 --> 00:07:24,286
- Get it?
- Big, shiny new things, yeah.
52
00:07:24,446 --> 00:07:27,046
- Absolutely, sir.
- Look at me. Look at me and listen.
53
00:07:27,766 --> 00:07:28,966
The customer is always right.
54
00:07:29,126 --> 00:07:30,125
[SCREAMS]
55
00:07:30,286 --> 00:07:33,085
BOTH: Right.
- The customer is always right.
56
00:07:33,246 --> 00:07:34,686
BUPKUS:
Exactly.
57
00:07:34,847 --> 00:07:36,326
Always.
58
00:07:36,487 --> 00:07:37,485
[GROANS]
59
00:07:37,646 --> 00:07:38,646
ALL:
Right.
60
00:07:38,807 --> 00:07:41,286
- Okay, we need something...
NAWT: My bad.
61
00:07:41,447 --> 00:07:42,646
We need something...
62
00:07:42,807 --> 00:07:43,805
[YELLS]
63
00:07:44,247 --> 00:07:46,286
...nutty.
- Nutty.
64
00:07:46,447 --> 00:07:48,486
- Something wacky.
NAWT: Wacky.
65
00:07:48,647 --> 00:07:51,126
We need something, something...
Something... We need something...
66
00:07:51,287 --> 00:07:52,886
Looney? Oops.
67
00:07:53,047 --> 00:07:54,166
Looney. Thank you.
68
00:07:54,327 --> 00:07:55,567
Looney?
69
00:07:57,847 --> 00:08:00,166
I'm an elk. Shoot me.
70
00:08:04,527 --> 00:08:06,487
Yes. Looney. Yes.
71
00:08:06,648 --> 00:08:10,167
Now you're talking.
Looney. Looney. That's it.
72
00:08:10,328 --> 00:08:12,726
That's the word I was looking for.
Looney.
73
00:08:12,887 --> 00:08:15,047
- Get the Looney Tunes.
- Looney Tunes!
74
00:08:15,207 --> 00:08:18,807
- Bring them here.
BLANKO: Sir. Just noticing, sir.
75
00:08:18,968 --> 00:08:21,767
They're from Earth.
What if they can't come?
76
00:08:22,288 --> 00:08:25,487
What did you say?
What if they can't come?
77
00:08:26,848 --> 00:08:28,767
- Make them.
- Cool.
78
00:08:29,288 --> 00:08:30,727
Make them. Ha-ha-ha.
79
00:08:30,888 --> 00:08:34,447
CREATURES:
We're gonna go get them. Yeah. All right.
80
00:08:42,648 --> 00:08:44,208
UMPIRE:
Strike!
81
00:08:47,329 --> 00:08:48,608
Looks good in that uniform.
82
00:08:48,769 --> 00:08:50,968
Looks great. Can't teach that.
83
00:08:51,128 --> 00:08:52,088
Can't teach it.
84
00:08:52,249 --> 00:08:55,288
Thanks for autographing that basketball
for my kid. I'm a hero now.
85
00:08:55,449 --> 00:08:56,928
No problem. Happy to do it, man.
86
00:08:57,089 --> 00:08:58,649
Let's go!
87
00:09:02,009 --> 00:09:04,409
Curve ball. Don't swing.
88
00:09:05,370 --> 00:09:07,289
Don't swing.
89
00:09:14,329 --> 00:09:15,769
UMPIRE:
Ball!
90
00:09:19,330 --> 00:09:21,649
Fastball, outside corner. Swing.
91
00:09:26,570 --> 00:09:28,609
Strike!
92
00:09:28,770 --> 00:09:29,889
CATCHER:
That was your pitch.
93
00:09:30,050 --> 00:09:31,290
I know, I missed it.
94
00:09:31,890 --> 00:09:34,290
Don't worry. I'll get you another one.
95
00:09:37,051 --> 00:09:39,449
Podolak. Podolak, come here.
96
00:09:39,610 --> 00:09:40,730
Sorry, I didn't mean to...
97
00:09:40,891 --> 00:09:43,409
- Come here.
- Yes, sir?
98
00:09:43,570 --> 00:09:47,489
Make sure nobody bothers Michael. I want
him to be the happiest player in the world.
99
00:09:47,650 --> 00:09:48,729
The happiest.
100
00:09:49,811 --> 00:09:52,050
Slider. Don't swing.
101
00:09:56,891 --> 00:09:58,210
Strike three!
102
00:09:58,371 --> 00:09:59,450
I told you not to swing.
103
00:09:59,611 --> 00:10:00,690
I couldn't help it.
104
00:10:00,851 --> 00:10:02,930
I understand. Hey, nice talking to you.
105
00:10:03,091 --> 00:10:04,770
[ORGAN PLAYING "CHARGE"]
106
00:10:10,611 --> 00:10:12,411
We're not worried. We're not worried.
107
00:10:15,852 --> 00:10:18,250
PLAYER 1: Good job, Mike.
PLAYER 2: Good hustle.
108
00:10:18,412 --> 00:10:19,730
Good cut, Michael. Good cut.
109
00:10:19,891 --> 00:10:22,651
That was a strikeout, Mike?
Good-looking strikeout. Real good.
110
00:10:22,812 --> 00:10:25,851
You look good when you strike out.
When I strike out, it looks nasty, man.
111
00:10:26,012 --> 00:10:28,251
At least you look good, man.
Good-looking.
112
00:10:28,412 --> 00:10:29,411
[GRUNTING]
113
00:10:29,572 --> 00:10:30,971
Hi, Mr. Jordan.
114
00:10:31,772 --> 00:10:33,611
Mr. Jordan, I'm Stan Podolak...
115
00:10:33,772 --> 00:10:35,091
[YELLS]
116
00:10:35,652 --> 00:10:37,211
[STAN GROANING]
117
00:10:37,653 --> 00:10:40,171
Oh, jeez.
118
00:10:43,172 --> 00:10:46,812
- You all right? That was a nasty fall.
- Yeah.
119
00:10:46,973 --> 00:10:51,092
Oh. I'm Stan Podolak, Mr. Jordan.
I'm the Barons' new publicist.
120
00:10:52,213 --> 00:10:55,452
I'm here to make your life easier.
Want me to drive you somewhere?
121
00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:58,852
Want me to pick up your laundry,
babysit your kids? I will do it.
122
00:10:59,013 --> 00:11:04,413
I am here to personally guarantee
that no one will ever bother you.
123
00:11:05,853 --> 00:11:07,693
[CROWD GASPING AND MURMURING]
124
00:11:13,294 --> 00:11:14,293
What was that?
125
00:11:19,454 --> 00:11:20,453
Hang on.
126
00:11:20,613 --> 00:11:23,492
- Hanging on.
- Hanging on.
127
00:11:23,653 --> 00:11:25,613
BLANKO:
Are we there yet?
128
00:11:28,014 --> 00:11:29,093
[YELLING]
129
00:11:33,534 --> 00:11:34,973
- Bombastic.
- Cool.
130
00:11:44,414 --> 00:11:45,654
[GUNSHOTS]
131
00:11:45,815 --> 00:11:47,734
ELMER:
All right, you irascible bunny.
132
00:11:47,895 --> 00:11:50,013
Come back here, you screwy rodent.
133
00:11:50,175 --> 00:11:54,493
I'll, uh, be with you in a second, folks,
after I finish with nature boy here.
134
00:11:54,654 --> 00:11:58,174
All right, you pesky rabbit.
I've got you now.
135
00:12:00,095 --> 00:12:01,614
Ouch!
136
00:12:02,175 --> 00:12:03,174
Hmm.
137
00:12:05,695 --> 00:12:08,814
One small step for moi...
138
00:12:08,975 --> 00:12:11,694
One giant leap for Moron Mountain.
139
00:12:11,855 --> 00:12:13,014
[SCREAMS]
140
00:12:13,855 --> 00:12:16,135
And one whopper headache for
Elmer Fudd.
141
00:12:20,575 --> 00:12:22,494
Diminutive, ain't they?
142
00:12:22,655 --> 00:12:25,415
- We seek the one they call Bugs Bunny.
- Yeah, Bugs Bunny.
143
00:12:25,576 --> 00:12:27,335
- Have you seen him?
- Where is this guy?
144
00:12:27,496 --> 00:12:29,215
BLANKO:
Is he around?
145
00:12:29,376 --> 00:12:32,655
Hmm. Bugs Bunny, Bugs Bunny.
146
00:12:32,816 --> 00:12:35,695
Say, does he have, uh,
great big long ears?
147
00:12:35,856 --> 00:12:38,175
- Like this?
- Yeah. Yeah.
148
00:12:38,336 --> 00:12:41,295
And does he hop around like this?
149
00:12:44,657 --> 00:12:46,176
- Yeah.
- Well, uh...
150
00:12:46,336 --> 00:12:48,496
...does he say, "What's up, doc?"
Like this:
151
00:12:50,616 --> 00:12:53,656
- Eh, what's up, doc?
- Yeah!
152
00:12:53,817 --> 00:12:55,736
Nope. Never heard of him.
153
00:12:56,177 --> 00:12:57,656
[ALL SIGHS]
154
00:12:58,296 --> 00:13:03,335
You know, maybe there is no intelligent life
out there in the universe after all.
155
00:13:04,097 --> 00:13:05,696
[HUMMING]
156
00:13:06,857 --> 00:13:09,896
POUND:
Hold on there, Mr. Looney Tune.
157
00:13:10,057 --> 00:13:12,216
BANG:
Hey, what do you think we are, stupid?
158
00:13:12,378 --> 00:13:14,776
Don't move a muscle.
159
00:13:15,457 --> 00:13:19,097
Okay, bunny, gather up your Tune pals.
160
00:13:19,257 --> 00:13:22,057
- We're taking you for a ride. Ha, ha.
NAWT: Move it, mister.
161
00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:25,576
Totally. All right.
So, like, where are we going?
162
00:13:29,378 --> 00:13:31,297
Are we there yet?
163
00:13:31,578 --> 00:13:33,537
STAN: Sorry it took so long.
MICHAEL: Don't worry.
164
00:13:33,698 --> 00:13:36,737
STAN: That exit wasn't clearly marked.
MICHAEL: Hold up, right here.
165
00:13:36,898 --> 00:13:38,297
STAN: What, here?
MICHAEL: Yes.
166
00:13:43,018 --> 00:13:44,857
Thanks for the ride, Sherm.
Appreciate it.
167
00:13:45,019 --> 00:13:46,737
- It's Stan, Mike.
- Sorry.
168
00:13:46,898 --> 00:13:50,177
But you can call me Sherm if you want to.
I've followed your whole career.
169
00:13:50,339 --> 00:13:53,098
- You're the greatest athlete that's ever lived.
- Stan, Stan, Stan.
170
00:13:54,378 --> 00:13:56,258
How do I get out?
The door doesn't work.
171
00:13:56,418 --> 00:13:59,297
- I'm sorry. I forgot... It's a classic.
- Oh, yeah.
172
00:13:59,458 --> 00:14:02,978
It's a classic, but it's got a few
peccadilloes. Hold on just a second.
173
00:14:03,138 --> 00:14:06,178
A few, huh? It's smoking, too, man.
You need to get that checked.
174
00:14:06,339 --> 00:14:08,058
[GROWLING]
175
00:14:08,219 --> 00:14:09,698
Thanks for the ride.
176
00:14:09,859 --> 00:14:11,298
Oh.
177
00:14:11,619 --> 00:14:14,338
Oh, this is nice. This is a nice house.
178
00:14:14,499 --> 00:14:16,498
That is a beauty. What is that, Colonial?
179
00:14:16,659 --> 00:14:17,858
It's a nice house.
180
00:14:18,019 --> 00:14:20,259
If you need anything done
around the house, I'd be happy...
181
00:14:20,419 --> 00:14:22,459
- Oh, no, I'm fine, thanks.
- Anything you need.
182
00:14:22,619 --> 00:14:24,538
- You gave me a ride. I appreciate it.
- Sure.
183
00:14:24,699 --> 00:14:27,099
Tomorrow I'm gonna drive, okay?
So I don't need the ride.
184
00:14:28,099 --> 00:14:29,539
But thanks, though.
185
00:14:29,700 --> 00:14:30,779
Too conspicuous?
186
00:14:32,140 --> 00:14:33,219
Yeah.
187
00:14:33,380 --> 00:14:34,698
[CHUCKLES]
188
00:14:34,860 --> 00:14:37,899
- All right. All right.
- Thanks, though.
189
00:14:38,060 --> 00:14:40,259
- Tomorrow.
- See you tomorrow.
190
00:14:42,060 --> 00:14:43,539
[BARKS]
191
00:14:48,101 --> 00:14:49,859
Come on, dog. No, not today.
192
00:14:50,021 --> 00:14:51,019
[GRUNTS]
193
00:14:51,180 --> 00:14:52,779
Dog, get off me. Your breath.
194
00:14:52,940 --> 00:14:54,820
- Mr. Jordan, are you okay?
- Get off of me!
195
00:14:54,980 --> 00:14:56,139
Get off of him, Charles.
196
00:14:56,301 --> 00:14:58,299
- Bad dog. Git.
- Get off of him.
197
00:14:58,460 --> 00:15:01,060
- Get off me, Charles.
- Get off of him before I cook you.
198
00:15:01,221 --> 00:15:03,820
Come on, come on.
Come on, baby. Come on.
199
00:15:06,261 --> 00:15:08,019
[CHATTERING AND CHEERING]
200
00:15:10,340 --> 00:15:11,820
Get out of the car!
201
00:15:14,381 --> 00:15:15,980
Good game.
202
00:15:16,741 --> 00:15:18,300
Hey, Jeff, you okay?
203
00:15:24,341 --> 00:15:26,180
- How was your game?
JEFF: I don't want to talk.
204
00:15:26,342 --> 00:15:27,940
- Hi, Dad.
JASMINE: Hey, hey.
205
00:15:28,101 --> 00:15:30,461
PASSENGERS:
Michael!
206
00:15:32,102 --> 00:15:34,340
- Daddy, Daddy!
- How you doing?
207
00:15:34,501 --> 00:15:36,741
JUANITA: Hey.
MICHAEL: Hey.
208
00:15:37,501 --> 00:15:40,461
- Ooh. You're all covered with drool, baby.
- That's your dog.
209
00:15:40,622 --> 00:15:42,821
- What's wrong with Jeff?
- He went two for five...
210
00:15:42,981 --> 00:15:45,021
...lost 32 points in his average.
- Is that all?
211
00:15:45,182 --> 00:15:48,261
Yeah, so that puts him at like a.685
or something.
212
00:15:48,422 --> 00:15:50,021
He's batting what?
213
00:15:50,382 --> 00:15:53,181
Mm.
Smells good in here. What you cooking?
214
00:15:53,342 --> 00:15:56,102
HOUSEKEEPER: Chicken.
- Chicken and what?
215
00:15:56,263 --> 00:15:58,982
- Chicken and collard greens.
- Good. I'm gonna need a good meal tonight.
216
00:15:59,143 --> 00:16:00,902
[HOUSEKEEPER CHUCKLES]
217
00:16:02,342 --> 00:16:03,461
Is everything okay?
218
00:16:03,822 --> 00:16:07,022
I stunk up the place.
I hope this baseball thing was a good idea.
219
00:16:07,183 --> 00:16:10,262
It was another career day for Michael Jordan
at Barons Field this afternoon.
220
00:16:10,422 --> 00:16:11,622
Let's face it. This baseball...
221
00:16:11,782 --> 00:16:13,622
What are you guys watching?
222
00:16:13,783 --> 00:16:16,542
- Today he had three strikeouts.
- Is this the only thing on TV?
223
00:16:16,703 --> 00:16:19,382
- That brings his batting average down...
- What's up with this?
224
00:16:19,543 --> 00:16:21,662
...to an anemic.214,
which is also his weight.
225
00:16:21,823 --> 00:16:25,422
Baseball bat?
Get this guy a tennis racquet.
226
00:16:25,583 --> 00:16:27,422
Did everyone get mad at you?
227
00:16:28,543 --> 00:16:31,503
No. Worse.
Everyone was real nice about it.
228
00:16:31,663 --> 00:16:35,063
Michael, I know golf is your sport,
but not here.
229
00:16:35,224 --> 00:16:37,343
I think you should open up
your stance a little.
230
00:16:37,504 --> 00:16:39,663
It might make you more aggressive
at the plate.
231
00:16:39,824 --> 00:16:44,063
- You think so? I'll try to remember that.
- Watching this hurts me more than you.
232
00:16:44,224 --> 00:16:47,983
What are you guys doing
watching this stuff? It's bad for you.
233
00:16:53,704 --> 00:16:58,104
There you go. Road Runner. Beep, beep.
234
00:17:01,984 --> 00:17:03,464
[ROAD RUNNER BEEPS]
235
00:17:03,904 --> 00:17:06,584
Oh. Stop this cartoon.
236
00:17:06,745 --> 00:17:08,344
[PORKY PANTING]
237
00:17:08,505 --> 00:17:13,864
We've got an emergency
Cartoon Character Union Meeting to go to.
238
00:17:14,785 --> 00:17:18,664
Hey, wait for me. Hold your horses.
239
00:17:24,785 --> 00:17:26,584
Dang. Where'd they go?
240
00:17:33,265 --> 00:17:35,984
- Stop the music. Top duck coming through.
FOGHORN: Hey!
241
00:17:36,145 --> 00:17:39,945
Jeez. It's getting so a guy can't even
get himself wet around here.
242
00:17:40,105 --> 00:17:42,304
So, what's the big emergency?
243
00:17:42,626 --> 00:17:46,265
Uh, these little guys would like to make
an announcement. Here you go, shorty.
244
00:17:46,425 --> 00:17:48,705
- Go.
- All right, all right.
245
00:17:48,866 --> 00:17:49,945
[CLEARS THROAT]
246
00:17:50,106 --> 00:17:54,505
You, all of you, are now our prisoners.
247
00:17:55,786 --> 00:17:57,865
[LAUGHING]
248
00:17:58,066 --> 00:18:01,066
TUNE:
We're in big trouble now.
249
00:18:01,906 --> 00:18:04,906
We are taking you to our theme park
in outer space.
250
00:18:05,066 --> 00:18:07,466
- No fooling.
- Where you'll be our slaves.
251
00:18:07,627 --> 00:18:10,985
And placed on display for the amusement
of our paying customers.
252
00:18:11,146 --> 00:18:13,865
Oh, fear clutches my breast.
253
00:18:14,027 --> 00:18:15,546
[LAUGHING]
254
00:18:15,707 --> 00:18:19,706
We ain't going nowheres.
255
00:18:25,347 --> 00:18:27,586
Eh, not so fast, doc.
256
00:18:27,747 --> 00:18:30,706
You just can't turn us into slaves.
That would be bad.
257
00:18:30,867 --> 00:18:33,066
You've gotta give us a chance
to defend ourselves.
258
00:18:33,227 --> 00:18:35,747
- Oh, yeah? Who says?
NAWT: Says who?
259
00:18:35,908 --> 00:18:37,026
BUPKUS: Why?
- Just a sec.
260
00:18:37,747 --> 00:18:40,626
- There. Read them and weep.
- What's this?
261
00:18:40,788 --> 00:18:44,026
"Give them a chance
to defend themselves."
262
00:18:44,187 --> 00:18:45,827
Aw. Do we have to?
263
00:18:45,988 --> 00:18:47,347
- It's in the rule book.
- It is.
264
00:18:47,508 --> 00:18:49,587
Okay. It is in the rule book.
265
00:18:49,748 --> 00:18:50,787
[SPEAKS IN SPANISH]
266
00:18:50,948 --> 00:18:53,067
We have to confer.
267
00:18:55,468 --> 00:19:00,747
All right, troops. It is for us to choose
a battlefield that affords us...
268
00:19:00,908 --> 00:19:02,467
Oh, I got it.
269
00:19:02,628 --> 00:19:05,027
Yes, Private Porkster?
270
00:19:05,188 --> 00:19:07,947
How about we challenge them to a...
271
00:19:08,908 --> 00:19:10,548
...spelling bee?
- Say...
272
00:19:10,709 --> 00:19:12,748
...we could have a bowling tournament.
273
00:19:12,909 --> 00:19:13,907
[CHUCKLES]
274
00:19:14,068 --> 00:19:15,948
Suffering succotash.
275
00:19:16,108 --> 00:19:17,868
What's wrong with all of you?
276
00:19:18,028 --> 00:19:19,468
I say we get a ladder...
277
00:19:19,629 --> 00:19:21,828
...wait till the old lady's out of the room...
278
00:19:21,989 --> 00:19:24,748
...then grab that little bird.
279
00:19:24,909 --> 00:19:28,148
Whoa, whoa, take a deep breath, Sly.
280
00:19:28,309 --> 00:19:31,828
Okay, let's analyze the competition.
281
00:19:32,309 --> 00:19:37,708
Now, uh, what are we looking at here?
We got a small race of invading aliens.
282
00:19:37,870 --> 00:19:40,988
Small arms. Short legs.
283
00:19:41,150 --> 00:19:42,669
Not very fast.
284
00:19:42,830 --> 00:19:44,508
Tiny little guys.
285
00:19:44,669 --> 00:19:46,949
Can't jump high.
286
00:19:47,150 --> 00:19:48,949
ALL:
Ah.
287
00:19:51,430 --> 00:19:54,909
We challenge you to a basketball game.
288
00:19:55,070 --> 00:19:57,029
All right. Basketball it is.
289
00:19:57,190 --> 00:19:58,829
- Basketball.
- Basketball.
290
00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:01,149
- Boy, oh, boy.
- All right.
291
00:20:01,310 --> 00:20:02,310
What is basketball?
292
00:20:02,470 --> 00:20:03,469
- What's that?
- Beats me.
293
00:20:03,630 --> 00:20:05,069
We didn't have that in school.
294
00:20:05,230 --> 00:20:07,790
- Lights.
FOGHORN: Pardon me. Sorry.
295
00:20:07,950 --> 00:20:09,869
Hey! Down in front.
296
00:20:10,030 --> 00:20:12,069
NARRATOR:
An exhilarating team sport...
297
00:20:12,230 --> 00:20:16,629
...currently growing rapidly in popularity
is basketball.
298
00:20:16,791 --> 00:20:21,389
Unlike football and baseball,
only five men can play on a team.
299
00:20:21,550 --> 00:20:26,030
It's a fast-paced, razzle-dazzle game
that requires quick wits...
300
00:20:26,190 --> 00:20:28,430
...and even faster reflexes.
301
00:20:28,951 --> 00:20:31,310
Here's how it's done
in the professional ranks...
302
00:20:31,471 --> 00:20:36,750
...the National Basketball Association,
featuring the best players in the world.
303
00:20:36,911 --> 00:20:40,470
- The best players in the world.
- The best.
304
00:20:40,751 --> 00:20:42,591
[HORNS HONKING]
305
00:20:56,472 --> 00:20:58,191
[CROWD BOOS]
306
00:20:59,511 --> 00:21:01,591
POUND:
Excuse me. Oh, so sorry.
307
00:21:01,752 --> 00:21:03,151
NAWT:
Excuse me.
308
00:21:03,992 --> 00:21:05,551
BUPKUS:
Ow. Get your feet out of my nose.
309
00:21:05,712 --> 00:21:07,631
BANG:
Quiet, they're looking.
310
00:21:07,792 --> 00:21:10,992
NAWT:
Hey, it's basketball.
311
00:21:11,153 --> 00:21:13,431
BANG: Where?
BLANKO: Whoa. Now what?
312
00:21:15,752 --> 00:21:17,111
[CROWD CHEERS]
313
00:21:17,272 --> 00:21:18,311
NAWT: Hey, hey!
POUND: What?
314
00:21:18,472 --> 00:21:20,231
NAWT: She's looking again.
BUPKUS: Close it up.
315
00:21:20,392 --> 00:21:21,751
- Tightly.
- Aah.
316
00:21:21,912 --> 00:21:23,391
POUND:
You poked me again.
317
00:21:23,873 --> 00:21:24,911
[NERDLUCKS GRUNTING]
318
00:21:25,073 --> 00:21:26,112
- Sweetheart?
- What?
319
00:21:26,272 --> 00:21:29,232
- I thought you'd get better seats.
- This is as good as I could get.
320
00:21:29,393 --> 00:21:32,512
This guy next to me is doing something
very weird in his raincoat.
321
00:21:32,673 --> 00:21:35,592
Honey, will you just let me watch the game?
Barkley's killing us.
322
00:21:35,953 --> 00:21:38,072
Hey, someone's killing someone.
323
00:21:38,233 --> 00:21:39,872
No. Seriously?
324
00:21:40,234 --> 00:21:42,472
POUND: Wow, a killer.
BANG: Let me see.
325
00:21:44,594 --> 00:21:46,233
There. That's him, the killer.
326
00:21:48,154 --> 00:21:49,273
He's big.
327
00:21:49,433 --> 00:21:51,112
He's good.
328
00:21:51,273 --> 00:21:52,433
He's mine.
329
00:21:52,593 --> 00:21:54,873
NAWT: Okay, go get him.
POUND: Yeah.
330
00:22:07,634 --> 00:22:11,673
Get back on defense.
Let's go. Get back on defense, man.
331
00:22:13,155 --> 00:22:14,833
[CROWD CHEERS]
332
00:22:16,674 --> 00:22:18,594
What are you doing?
333
00:22:26,074 --> 00:22:27,713
Time out. Call time out.
334
00:22:27,875 --> 00:22:28,874
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
335
00:22:29,035 --> 00:22:31,474
What's wrong with you, man?
You're killing us.
336
00:22:31,635 --> 00:22:34,194
- Let him in. Open up.
- Open.
337
00:22:34,355 --> 00:22:36,954
BUPKUS:
Wow. He did it.
338
00:22:37,115 --> 00:22:39,594
I got it. I got his talent.
339
00:22:39,755 --> 00:22:40,954
- All right.
- Super.
340
00:22:41,115 --> 00:22:43,914
- Sit down, Chuck.
- Man, I'm fine. I am fine.
341
00:22:44,075 --> 00:22:45,795
No, no. I played you too many minutes.
342
00:22:45,955 --> 00:22:48,635
- But I'm not tired.
- Go get the doctor.
343
00:22:57,396 --> 00:22:59,075
- What's up, man? You all right?
- Yeah.
344
00:22:59,236 --> 00:23:00,875
You sure?
345
00:23:01,636 --> 00:23:04,955
Come on, we're okay.
You're okay. Come on, let's go.
346
00:23:10,476 --> 00:23:12,595
Come on, Patrick. It's showtime.
347
00:23:13,796 --> 00:23:15,115
MAN:
What's wrong with him?
348
00:23:21,796 --> 00:23:23,155
Popcorn...
349
00:23:23,436 --> 00:23:24,676
In a shocking development...
350
00:23:24,837 --> 00:23:28,436
...five NBA players have been placed
on the disabled list in the last 24 hours...
351
00:23:28,596 --> 00:23:30,795
...all suffering from the same
mysterious ailment.
352
00:23:30,956 --> 00:23:32,476
- Yeah? Hmm.
- Whatever this mystery is...
353
00:23:32,637 --> 00:23:36,076
...it affects the player's coordination.
- I'll be home in a couple days.
354
00:23:36,237 --> 00:23:38,396
- Watch Patrick Ewing.
- Put your mom on the phone.
355
00:23:39,957 --> 00:23:42,676
- It wasn't just in New York.
- Hey, baby. How you doing?
356
00:23:42,837 --> 00:23:46,436
- Check out the highlights.
- You watching TV?
357
00:23:48,357 --> 00:23:49,716
What the hell is going on?
358
00:23:49,877 --> 00:23:54,436
- You gonna be all right?
- I'm ready, coach. All right.
359
00:23:55,038 --> 00:23:56,957
Looks like I retired just in time.
360
00:23:57,117 --> 00:23:58,677
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
361
00:23:58,838 --> 00:24:03,316
All right, baby, gotta go.
I'll call you later, okay? Love you. Bye.
362
00:24:03,478 --> 00:24:04,477
It's open!
363
00:24:04,957 --> 00:24:07,917
Come on, it's game time.
Get your Hanes on. Lace up your Nikes.
364
00:24:08,078 --> 00:24:11,397
Grab your Wheaties and your Gatorade
and we'll pick up a Big Mac on the way.
365
00:24:11,558 --> 00:24:13,838
Now we take you live
to the Forum in Los Angeles...
366
00:24:13,998 --> 00:24:16,237
...where the Lakers are refusing
to take the court.
367
00:24:16,398 --> 00:24:18,078
[CHATTERING]
368
00:24:18,958 --> 00:24:19,998
Guys, we gotta get dressed.
369
00:24:20,158 --> 00:24:23,797
We got a game in five minutes.
I mean, we're talking about a huge fine here.
370
00:24:23,959 --> 00:24:25,957
- No, we can't go in the locker room.
- Oh, man.
371
00:24:26,118 --> 00:24:29,198
You heard what happened to Barkley
and Ewing. There's germs in there.
372
00:24:29,358 --> 00:24:32,358
Cedric, that was in New York,
3000 miles away.
373
00:24:32,518 --> 00:24:35,038
Bacteria can travel faster
than the speed of light.
374
00:24:35,199 --> 00:24:38,198
- It could be Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
PLAYER: Yeah, could be.
375
00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:40,638
All right. Dress in the hallway.
376
00:24:40,919 --> 00:24:43,078
PLAYERS:
Okay.
377
00:24:45,679 --> 00:24:50,558
Okay, okay, now, which one of you maroons
has ever played basketball before?
378
00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:54,959
I have, coach. And there's an important
strategic question I need to ask you.
379
00:24:55,120 --> 00:24:56,278
Yes, yes?
380
00:24:59,880 --> 00:25:03,159
What do you think? I'm kind of partial
to purple and gold, myself.
381
00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:05,718
It goes better with my coloring.
A one, two, three, four.
382
00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:08,239
Guys? Nice outfit, Daffy.
383
00:25:08,400 --> 00:25:12,919
The little aliens say it's their turn
to, uh, use the court.
384
00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:16,199
Sure, let the little pipsqueaks
knock themselves out.
385
00:25:16,360 --> 00:25:19,159
Too bad you can't practice
getting taller, boys.
386
00:25:19,320 --> 00:25:20,679
[TUNES LAUGHING]
387
00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:22,000
[THUNDER CRASHES]
388
00:25:26,641 --> 00:25:28,599
BUPKUS: Whoa!
NAWT: Ah!
389
00:25:41,281 --> 00:25:42,280
[YELLS]
390
00:25:47,761 --> 00:25:49,680
[GROWLS AND CHUCKLES]
391
00:25:50,401 --> 00:25:51,520
[ROARS]
392
00:25:56,402 --> 00:25:57,680
[CHUCKLING]
393
00:25:57,841 --> 00:25:59,040
Hey, little pig.
394
00:26:00,122 --> 00:26:02,001
- Boo.
- Aah!
395
00:26:03,321 --> 00:26:05,161
I wet myself.
396
00:26:05,322 --> 00:26:07,000
[MONSTARS CHUCKLING]
397
00:26:08,042 --> 00:26:10,961
Time to play a little basketball.
398
00:26:15,162 --> 00:26:17,921
Those little pipsqueaks
just turned into superstars.
399
00:26:18,082 --> 00:26:20,601
They're monsters.
400
00:26:20,762 --> 00:26:22,561
Suffering succotash.
401
00:26:22,722 --> 00:26:24,721
They're Monstars.
402
00:26:26,682 --> 00:26:28,762
Bye-bye.
403
00:26:31,162 --> 00:26:34,082
Eh,
I think we might need a little bit of help.
404
00:26:34,363 --> 00:26:35,362
[BILL SIGHS]
405
00:26:35,522 --> 00:26:37,402
BILL:
A hundred and seventy-five yards.
406
00:26:37,563 --> 00:26:41,561
Okay, little fella.
You my friend or are you my enemy?
407
00:26:41,722 --> 00:26:44,202
You are my friend, right?
You are my ally.
408
00:26:45,163 --> 00:26:47,802
You are my associate,
my personal assistant.
409
00:26:47,963 --> 00:26:51,122
You are my weapon. You are leaving.
410
00:26:52,524 --> 00:26:55,362
- Great shot.
- Nice shot, Mr. Murray.
411
00:27:00,204 --> 00:27:01,922
MICHAEL:
You can stop posing now.
412
00:27:02,084 --> 00:27:03,402
[CHUCKLES]
413
00:27:04,564 --> 00:27:06,363
- Good try.
- Not bad, not bad.
414
00:27:06,523 --> 00:27:08,523
BILL: Something for you to shoot at.
- Hit it good.
415
00:27:08,684 --> 00:27:10,483
Do my best.
416
00:27:11,804 --> 00:27:13,403
It was a good shot.
417
00:27:13,564 --> 00:27:15,363
Yeah, I know.
418
00:27:15,524 --> 00:27:16,923
Mike, I gotta ask you something.
419
00:27:17,083 --> 00:27:18,643
The NBA has to face reality.
420
00:27:18,804 --> 00:27:20,843
What's happening to these players
is serious.
421
00:27:21,004 --> 00:27:23,563
They're gonna need new players
with talent.
422
00:27:23,724 --> 00:27:27,643
Guys who are skilled, but never really
thought about a professional career before.
423
00:27:29,164 --> 00:27:30,683
You think I got a shot?
424
00:27:32,604 --> 00:27:33,963
- Come on, really?
- No.
425
00:27:34,124 --> 00:27:37,484
- Don't kid me.
- Listen. It's a man's game.
426
00:27:37,844 --> 00:27:39,843
- You can't play.
- What if I tried really hard?
427
00:27:40,004 --> 00:27:41,964
Keep it down. I'm trying to hit this ball.
428
00:27:42,245 --> 00:27:43,924
It's because I'm white, isn't it?
429
00:27:44,085 --> 00:27:46,163
No. Larry's white. So what?
430
00:27:46,325 --> 00:27:49,723
Larry's not white. Larry's clear.
431
00:27:51,045 --> 00:27:52,604
- Good shot, Larry.
STAN: That's nice.
432
00:27:52,765 --> 00:27:54,564
Get inside his ball.
433
00:27:54,845 --> 00:27:55,885
STAN:
Whoa.
434
00:27:56,045 --> 00:27:57,604
LARRY:
You clowns can't beat that.
435
00:27:57,765 --> 00:27:59,764
- My best shot ever.
- You haven't played long.
436
00:27:59,925 --> 00:28:00,924
A Hall-of-Fame shot.
437
00:28:01,086 --> 00:28:03,244
- Really nice shot, Mr. Bird.
LARRY: Larry, please.
438
00:28:03,406 --> 00:28:05,564
- Nice shot, Mr. Larry.
- Nice shot, Larry.
439
00:28:05,726 --> 00:28:07,405
You can do this.
440
00:28:07,565 --> 00:28:09,725
Don't be nervous. You can do this.
441
00:28:09,885 --> 00:28:12,565
Larry, you feel that the NBA
has to face reality, don't you?
442
00:28:12,726 --> 00:28:15,924
Gotta look for more dominant players
in places they never looked before.
443
00:28:16,085 --> 00:28:18,725
Just look at the ball.
Visualize where you want it to go.
444
00:28:18,886 --> 00:28:21,885
- Right, right, right.
- Be the ball. Be the ball.
445
00:28:22,046 --> 00:28:23,245
Get off the tee.
446
00:28:23,406 --> 00:28:25,125
You can't jump.
447
00:28:26,566 --> 00:28:27,925
I... Yeah, go on.
448
00:28:28,606 --> 00:28:30,965
- Close to the pin?
BILL: Close to the pin? For dinner?
449
00:28:31,127 --> 00:28:33,326
LARRY: Sounds good.
BILL: I'll go close to the pin.
450
00:28:33,486 --> 00:28:35,486
- Okay, cool.
- I'll take some of that.
451
00:28:37,847 --> 00:28:38,965
BILL:
That's not bad.
452
00:28:39,607 --> 00:28:40,765
LARRY:
Good shot.
453
00:28:40,926 --> 00:28:42,606
Get down.
454
00:28:43,486 --> 00:28:45,565
MICHAEL:
Look at that. Look at that spin.
455
00:28:56,167 --> 00:28:57,406
Come on.
456
00:28:59,687 --> 00:29:00,887
It is alive.
457
00:29:03,807 --> 00:29:08,486
Yes! Yes! My first hole in one. Yes!
458
00:29:08,968 --> 00:29:09,966
BILL:
Oh.
459
00:29:10,127 --> 00:29:12,527
LARRY: Don't say it.
STAN: Never seen one of these before.
460
00:29:12,688 --> 00:29:16,527
Larry, nothing but the bottom of the cup.
461
00:29:16,687 --> 00:29:19,247
BILL: That's his ball too.
- Yeah, yeah, it's my ball. Sorry.
462
00:29:19,408 --> 00:29:21,167
- Let me get a picture.
- You guys are jealous.
463
00:29:21,328 --> 00:29:25,607
All right, here we go. Now, you gotta smile.
Reach in for the ball and then smile, okay?
464
00:29:25,768 --> 00:29:27,407
- Yes.
- And you think, "This is good."
465
00:29:27,568 --> 00:29:28,967
MICHAEL: Just take the picture.
- Okay.
466
00:29:38,688 --> 00:29:40,287
- What kind of camera is that?
- Just...
467
00:29:40,448 --> 00:29:42,288
Don't point it at me. Close the lens cap.
468
00:29:42,449 --> 00:29:44,328
- I didn't do anything.
- Where did he go?
469
00:29:44,489 --> 00:29:46,327
[YELLING]
470
00:29:48,889 --> 00:29:50,328
Hey!
471
00:29:50,889 --> 00:29:53,488
No, no, no!
472
00:30:02,729 --> 00:30:04,408
[BIRDS TWITTERING]
473
00:30:04,930 --> 00:30:08,288
Oh, uh, look out for that first step,
doc, it's a real lulu.
474
00:30:08,890 --> 00:30:09,888
Bugs Bunny?
475
00:30:10,049 --> 00:30:12,088
Eh, you were expecting
maybe the Easter Bunny?
476
00:30:12,730 --> 00:30:15,049
- You're a cartoon. You're not real.
- Not real, eh?
477
00:30:15,210 --> 00:30:17,409
If I weren't real, could I do this?
478
00:30:20,329 --> 00:30:21,688
Ugh.
479
00:30:21,849 --> 00:30:23,409
Oh, look. Is that Michael?
480
00:30:23,570 --> 00:30:25,169
It's Michael.
481
00:30:25,330 --> 00:30:26,689
GRANNY:
It's Air Jordan.
482
00:30:27,650 --> 00:30:29,369
Basketball.
483
00:30:29,530 --> 00:30:31,489
Ooh. I tought I taw...
484
00:30:31,890 --> 00:30:35,049
I did. I did see Michael Jordan.
485
00:30:35,210 --> 00:30:39,129
Pardon me, Mr. Jordan.
Uh, can I have your auto...?
486
00:30:39,290 --> 00:30:40,609
Your John Hancock, please?
487
00:30:40,770 --> 00:30:42,809
Back off. Let the doctor take a look.
488
00:30:45,651 --> 00:30:47,570
- A little high.
- No.
489
00:30:47,731 --> 00:30:48,849
Going down.
490
00:30:49,010 --> 00:30:50,690
No!
491
00:30:53,411 --> 00:30:55,289
[CHATTERING]
492
00:30:55,690 --> 00:30:58,690
So, what do you say we go
for a little spin?
493
00:31:01,411 --> 00:31:04,490
Hmm.
Now, let's see what we got inside here.
494
00:31:04,651 --> 00:31:06,610
[YODELS]
495
00:31:06,771 --> 00:31:08,370
DAFFY:
Say "ah."
496
00:31:10,212 --> 00:31:12,651
All right. He's okay.
497
00:31:14,091 --> 00:31:17,611
- What's going on here?
- Why, Michael, I thought you'd never ask.
498
00:31:18,091 --> 00:31:21,930
These aliens from outer space want
to make us slaves in their theme park.
499
00:31:22,092 --> 00:31:23,491
What do we care? They're little.
500
00:31:23,652 --> 00:31:25,771
So we challenged them
to a basketball game.
501
00:31:25,932 --> 00:31:28,731
But then they show up
and they ain't so little. They're huge.
502
00:31:28,891 --> 00:31:32,051
We need to beat these guys,
because they're talking about slavery.
503
00:31:32,212 --> 00:31:35,931
They'll make us do stand-up comedy,
the same jokes every night for all eternity.
504
00:31:36,092 --> 00:31:39,331
We'll be locked up like wild animals
and then trotted out to perform...
505
00:31:39,492 --> 00:31:43,451
...for a bunch of lowbrow, bug-eyed,
fat-headed, humor-challenged aliens.
506
00:31:43,612 --> 00:31:46,132
Uh, what I'm trying to say is...
507
00:31:46,293 --> 00:31:48,491
...we need your help!
508
00:31:49,212 --> 00:31:50,851
Yeah, but I'm a baseball player now.
509
00:31:51,012 --> 00:31:55,091
Right. And I'm a Shakespearean actor.
510
00:31:58,173 --> 00:32:02,772
Mike? Michael? It's Stan. Stan Podolak.
511
00:32:02,933 --> 00:32:05,492
Uh, look,
I need you to come out now, okay?
512
00:32:05,653 --> 00:32:07,692
Because you got a baseball game
tomorrow.
513
00:32:07,853 --> 00:32:11,492
And I'd look pretty stupid
if you don't show up.
514
00:32:11,654 --> 00:32:14,212
Think Michael's all right?
I hate to leave him like this.
515
00:32:14,373 --> 00:32:18,333
I'm sure he's fine. I think he just had to
get away from that Stan character.
516
00:32:18,494 --> 00:32:20,533
- God, he's pathetic, isn't he?
- Yeah.
517
00:32:20,694 --> 00:32:22,453
I'm gonna give us both twos back there.
518
00:32:22,614 --> 00:32:24,773
We weren't in any kind of
emotional state to putt.
519
00:32:24,934 --> 00:32:26,613
- I think that's fair.
- Yeah.
520
00:32:26,773 --> 00:32:31,012
Now, if Mike is gone,
the NBA is gonna need some new people.
521
00:32:31,174 --> 00:32:32,413
There's room at the top.
522
00:32:32,574 --> 00:32:35,253
An exciting guy who could maybe
even perform at half-time.
523
00:32:35,414 --> 00:32:38,093
You still tight with David Stern?
A phone call from you...
524
00:32:38,374 --> 00:32:42,013
Look, I want to help, but I haven't
played basketball in a long time.
525
00:32:42,174 --> 00:32:44,453
- My timing's all off.
- Eh, we'll fix your timing.
526
00:32:44,934 --> 00:32:46,533
Look at our facilities.
527
00:32:46,694 --> 00:32:48,934
We've got hoops.
528
00:32:49,095 --> 00:32:50,693
ELMER:
We got weights.
529
00:32:51,174 --> 00:32:53,813
We've got balls. Whoa!
530
00:32:53,974 --> 00:32:56,054
You sure do. This place is a mess.
531
00:32:56,215 --> 00:32:58,613
Mess?
You're worried about a little mess?
532
00:32:58,775 --> 00:33:01,894
There's nothing here
a little spit shine wouldn't fix.
533
00:33:02,055 --> 00:33:04,214
- Spit shine!
- Spit shine!
534
00:33:22,296 --> 00:33:23,854
Lemony-fresh.
535
00:33:24,015 --> 00:33:25,655
You guys are nuts.
536
00:33:25,816 --> 00:33:28,735
Correction: We're Looney Tunes.
537
00:33:28,895 --> 00:33:34,374
And as such are the exclusive property
and trademark of Warner Bros. Inc.
538
00:33:35,016 --> 00:33:36,695
[RUMBLING]
539
00:33:38,856 --> 00:33:40,735
[GROWLING]
540
00:33:42,376 --> 00:33:44,135
I'm here.
541
00:33:44,896 --> 00:33:46,815
Me too.
542
00:33:47,536 --> 00:33:49,016
That hurt.
543
00:33:49,177 --> 00:33:51,056
[GROWLING]
544
00:33:51,376 --> 00:33:52,375
Who are these guys?
545
00:33:52,536 --> 00:33:56,976
Well, uh, remember the tiny aliens
I told you about?
546
00:33:57,136 --> 00:33:58,296
Oh.
547
00:33:58,457 --> 00:34:02,136
You heard of the Dream Team?
Well, we're the Mean Team, wussy-man.
548
00:34:02,297 --> 00:34:04,135
- Wussy-man.
- Wussy-man?
549
00:34:04,296 --> 00:34:07,456
We're the Monstars. M-O-N... Um...
550
00:34:07,617 --> 00:34:10,056
Let's see what you got, chump.
551
00:34:11,137 --> 00:34:12,696
I don't play basketball anymore.
552
00:34:12,857 --> 00:34:15,216
"I don't play basketball anymore."
553
00:34:15,377 --> 00:34:16,376
[LAUGHING]
554
00:34:16,537 --> 00:34:18,377
Maybe you're chicken.
555
00:34:18,537 --> 00:34:19,776
[MIMICS CHICKEN]
556
00:34:19,937 --> 00:34:22,497
I say, I resemble that remark.
557
00:34:22,657 --> 00:34:23,656
You calling me chicken?
558
00:34:23,817 --> 00:34:25,377
Hey. Come here.
559
00:34:29,417 --> 00:34:31,217
Here you go. Take him.
560
00:34:31,737 --> 00:34:34,657
Watch the footwork. Can you believe it?
561
00:34:35,817 --> 00:34:38,696
Get out of the way.
562
00:34:38,858 --> 00:34:40,417
[YELLING]
563
00:34:41,978 --> 00:34:45,657
POUND:
Hey, everybody. Look at your hero now.
564
00:34:45,818 --> 00:34:47,497
[MONSTARS LAUGHING]
565
00:34:49,738 --> 00:34:51,418
You guys are making a big mistake.
566
00:34:51,579 --> 00:34:54,737
You're all washed up, baldy.
567
00:34:54,898 --> 00:34:55,977
Baldy?
568
00:34:56,138 --> 00:34:57,458
He is not washed up.
569
00:34:57,618 --> 00:34:59,338
- Michael's the greatest ever.
- Shut up.
570
00:34:59,619 --> 00:35:01,178
Ooh.
571
00:35:01,338 --> 00:35:02,697
[TWEETY WHIMPERING]
572
00:35:03,899 --> 00:35:05,938
TWEETY:
My poor little cranium.
573
00:35:06,099 --> 00:35:09,378
- You okay?
- Yeah, are you okay?
574
00:35:09,539 --> 00:35:10,538
Whoops.
575
00:35:10,699 --> 00:35:14,258
You're not scared of them,
are you, Michael?
576
00:35:23,260 --> 00:35:25,419
- Let's play some basketball.
TUNES: Yeah.
577
00:35:28,700 --> 00:35:31,619
PLAYER:
Yeah, serve her! Come on! Rebound!
578
00:35:46,460 --> 00:35:49,259
You're...
You're Charles Barkley.
579
00:35:50,900 --> 00:35:53,739
Girls. Come on over. Hurry up. Hurry.
580
00:35:53,900 --> 00:35:56,020
Look. It's Charles Barkley.
581
00:35:56,180 --> 00:35:57,179
Hey, can I play?
582
00:35:57,340 --> 00:35:58,859
[GIRLS CHATTERING]
583
00:36:22,661 --> 00:36:24,380
You're not Charles Barkley.
584
00:36:24,541 --> 00:36:26,461
Just a wannabe who looks like him.
585
00:36:27,461 --> 00:36:29,820
Sorry. Break out.
586
00:36:29,981 --> 00:36:32,381
You shouldn't even be here. Be gone.
587
00:36:33,101 --> 00:36:34,981
Wannabe. Be gone.
588
00:36:35,222 --> 00:36:36,901
DOCTOR:
Just a few more tests, gentlemen.
589
00:36:37,061 --> 00:36:41,421
Electrolyte levels, glucose,
CBCs, RBCs, etcetera.
590
00:36:41,581 --> 00:36:43,701
And we've scheduled a 12-lead
stress test...
591
00:36:43,862 --> 00:36:47,421
...and neurological battery
to include EEG, reflex tests...
592
00:36:47,902 --> 00:36:52,861
And this girl, 5-feet-nothing,
blocked my shot.
593
00:36:53,022 --> 00:36:55,422
When did you first start having
this dream?
594
00:36:55,582 --> 00:36:58,142
It wasn't a dream. It really happened.
595
00:36:58,862 --> 00:37:00,222
[BEEPING]
596
00:37:00,702 --> 00:37:04,941
And it climbed up my back
and into my brain.
597
00:37:05,102 --> 00:37:08,862
Are there any other areas
besides basketball...
598
00:37:09,022 --> 00:37:13,862
...where you find yourself
unable to perform?
599
00:37:16,263 --> 00:37:18,422
- No.
- Just asking.
600
00:37:21,303 --> 00:37:25,302
I've been MRI'd, EKG'd,
x-rayed, laser beamed...
601
00:37:25,463 --> 00:37:27,542
I promise I'll never swear again.
602
00:37:27,703 --> 00:37:29,582
I'll never get another technical.
603
00:37:29,743 --> 00:37:30,862
I'll never trash-talk.
604
00:37:31,023 --> 00:37:32,182
I've got other skills.
605
00:37:32,343 --> 00:37:34,783
- I could go back and work on the farm.
- Really?
606
00:37:34,943 --> 00:37:38,262
Or maybe I could go back to the jungle
and be a missionary again.
607
00:37:38,424 --> 00:37:41,303
What are you saying?
That I'm trying to disobey my mama?
608
00:37:41,464 --> 00:37:43,182
I didn't say that. You did, Muggsy.
609
00:37:43,344 --> 00:37:44,422
But I love my mama.
610
00:37:44,584 --> 00:37:46,543
Still can't find anything wrong with us.
611
00:37:46,704 --> 00:37:48,303
Hey, maybe nothing's wrong with us.
612
00:37:48,464 --> 00:37:50,623
That's right, Muggs.
Maybe it's just in our head.
613
00:37:50,784 --> 00:37:53,223
We're fine.
It's just some psychosomatic deal.
614
00:37:53,384 --> 00:37:55,943
Or something to do with the moon,
or the alignment of the planet.
615
00:37:57,344 --> 00:37:59,023
I'll never go out with Madonna again.
616
00:37:59,264 --> 00:38:01,023
[GRUNTING AND PANTING]
617
00:38:03,425 --> 00:38:04,863
What are you doing?
618
00:38:05,024 --> 00:38:08,143
- I'm, uh... I'm fixing a divot.
- Oh.
619
00:38:09,944 --> 00:38:12,263
He's fixing a divot!
620
00:38:25,225 --> 00:38:33,065
[BEEPS]
621
00:38:40,866 --> 00:38:43,104
Has anyone here ever played basketball?
622
00:38:43,265 --> 00:38:45,265
Um, I have.
623
00:38:46,066 --> 00:38:47,624
I'd like to try out for the team.
624
00:38:48,626 --> 00:38:51,464
- Hey.
- Hi. My name is Lola Bunny.
625
00:38:51,626 --> 00:38:54,305
- Lola?
- Ha, ha. Yes.
626
00:38:54,466 --> 00:38:58,065
Hello. Eh, my name is Bugs.
627
00:38:58,226 --> 00:39:00,626
Ahem. You want to play a little
one-on-one, doll?
628
00:39:01,146 --> 00:39:02,665
- "Doll"?
- Uh-huh.
629
00:39:02,827 --> 00:39:07,105
- On the court, Bugs.
- Sure.
630
00:39:07,266 --> 00:39:08,306
Ooh. She's hot.
631
00:39:08,466 --> 00:39:09,465
[SIZZLES]
632
00:39:09,626 --> 00:39:11,385
There she goes.
633
00:39:11,546 --> 00:39:14,306
- Ready?
- Yes.
634
00:39:15,346 --> 00:39:17,146
I got it. I got it.
635
00:39:19,827 --> 00:39:21,225
That girl's got some skills.
636
00:39:23,027 --> 00:39:24,386
Yes?
637
00:39:27,107 --> 00:39:30,506
Don't ever call me "doll."
638
00:39:31,347 --> 00:39:32,906
Check.
639
00:39:34,867 --> 00:39:37,186
Hey, nice playing with you.
640
00:39:37,347 --> 00:39:38,347
Very smooth.
641
00:39:38,507 --> 00:39:41,386
Ah, she's obviously nuts about me.
642
00:39:41,547 --> 00:39:42,547
Obviously.
643
00:39:42,708 --> 00:39:43,706
[SPEAKS IN FRENCH]
644
00:39:43,867 --> 00:39:45,427
MICHAEL:
Okay. Where's the ball?
645
00:39:46,988 --> 00:39:48,227
Let's do some drills.
646
00:39:48,387 --> 00:39:49,827
[TUNES CHATTERING]
647
00:39:53,747 --> 00:39:55,707
Can anyone lend me a pair of sneakers?
648
00:39:55,868 --> 00:39:58,067
Uh, sneakers?
649
00:40:01,748 --> 00:40:03,547
- Sorry.
- Someone has to go to my house...
650
00:40:03,708 --> 00:40:06,507
...and pick up my basketball gear.
- To your house?
651
00:40:06,668 --> 00:40:08,388
- In 3-D land?
MICHAEL: Yeah.
652
00:40:08,548 --> 00:40:10,548
Whatever you do...
653
00:40:10,709 --> 00:40:12,628
...don't forget my North Carolina shorts.
654
00:40:12,788 --> 00:40:15,348
Your shorts? From college?
655
00:40:15,509 --> 00:40:18,228
I wore them under my Chicago Bulls
uniform every game.
656
00:40:19,548 --> 00:40:21,587
Hey. I washed them after every game.
657
00:40:21,749 --> 00:40:22,868
- Yeah.
- Sure.
658
00:40:23,029 --> 00:40:24,348
- I did.
- Gross.
659
00:40:25,909 --> 00:40:28,468
DAFFY:
The view back here stinks.
660
00:40:28,629 --> 00:40:30,108
BUGS: Whoa.
DAFFY: What?
661
00:40:30,269 --> 00:40:32,188
BUGS:
We're right in front of Michael's house.
662
00:40:32,349 --> 00:40:33,748
DAFFY:
I knew that.
663
00:40:33,909 --> 00:40:36,508
BUGS:
Shh. Okay, let's go in this way.
664
00:40:36,669 --> 00:40:39,068
DAFFY:
I say, let's go in that way.
665
00:40:40,149 --> 00:40:42,949
BUGS:
He just never learns.
666
00:40:44,469 --> 00:40:46,069
DAFFY:
Now, let me see.
667
00:40:46,230 --> 00:40:50,469
I must be very, very close.
668
00:40:51,150 --> 00:40:52,389
[GROWLS]
669
00:40:52,550 --> 00:40:53,668
Mother.
670
00:40:53,829 --> 00:40:55,708
[DOG BARKING AND DAFFY YELLING]
671
00:40:55,869 --> 00:40:57,749
[BUGS HUMMING]
672
00:40:59,310 --> 00:41:01,149
Nice digs.
673
00:41:01,310 --> 00:41:02,789
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
674
00:41:03,550 --> 00:41:07,309
Well, well. I wonder who that could be.
675
00:41:08,910 --> 00:41:11,870
Twinkle, twinkle, little star.
676
00:41:12,030 --> 00:41:14,909
Shh. Everyone's sleeping.
677
00:41:15,070 --> 00:41:16,989
- I knew that.
- Come on, come on.
678
00:41:17,150 --> 00:41:19,230
We gotta find Michael's basketball stuff.
679
00:41:20,830 --> 00:41:23,190
Nope. Nothing in here.
680
00:41:23,870 --> 00:41:27,190
Nope. Ah, but a very nice dinette set.
681
00:41:27,351 --> 00:41:29,790
Uh-uh. Not here.
682
00:41:29,951 --> 00:41:31,310
Let's look upstairs.
683
00:41:31,471 --> 00:41:33,510
Yes, oh, fearless leader.
684
00:41:34,311 --> 00:41:37,630
So he needs his special underwear.
685
00:41:37,791 --> 00:41:39,350
Oh. Shh.
686
00:41:39,511 --> 00:41:42,270
Sorry.
You think she's got enough toys?
687
00:41:42,431 --> 00:41:46,311
BUGS: Speaking of toys, you know all
those mugs and t-shirts and lunch boxes...
688
00:41:46,471 --> 00:41:48,430
...with our pictures on them?
- Yeah.
689
00:41:48,591 --> 00:41:50,630
BUGS: You, uh, ever see any money
from all that stuff?
690
00:41:50,792 --> 00:41:53,350
DAFFY: Ha. Not a cent.
BUGS: Hmm. Me neither.
691
00:41:53,512 --> 00:41:54,631
DAFFY:
It's a crying shame.
692
00:41:54,792 --> 00:41:57,791
We gotta get new agents.
We're getting screwed.
693
00:41:57,952 --> 00:41:59,431
BUGS:
We have found the trophy room.
694
00:41:59,592 --> 00:42:01,431
Now spread out and search the place.
695
00:42:01,592 --> 00:42:04,631
Yes, sahib. Oh, brother.
696
00:42:04,792 --> 00:42:07,871
Here I am, in the peak of my form
playing second banana...
697
00:42:08,032 --> 00:42:10,551
...to some sort of a harebrain.
- Yap, yap, yap. Hmm.
698
00:42:10,712 --> 00:42:13,192
This could be useful. Aha.
699
00:42:13,593 --> 00:42:15,071
If this were a union job, I...
700
00:42:15,832 --> 00:42:17,032
That's very nice.
701
00:42:18,113 --> 00:42:19,951
Oh, one of his shoes.
702
00:42:24,953 --> 00:42:26,391
Where is that other shoe?
703
00:42:28,193 --> 00:42:29,992
Where are you?
704
00:42:30,793 --> 00:42:32,152
Eureka!
705
00:42:33,113 --> 00:42:34,632
Come to Papa.
706
00:42:34,793 --> 00:42:36,472
[BUGS GRUNTING]
707
00:42:37,513 --> 00:42:40,712
- Oops.
- What a fuzz-foot. You are so clumsy.
708
00:42:42,073 --> 00:42:44,352
- Catch, feather head.
- Thanks.
709
00:42:47,993 --> 00:42:52,072
- Well, time to go.
- Did we get everything?
710
00:42:52,234 --> 00:42:54,433
- The shorts.
- The shorts.
711
00:42:54,594 --> 00:42:56,473
BUGS:
In there?
712
00:42:56,634 --> 00:42:58,472
Okay, I'll check.
713
00:42:59,833 --> 00:43:01,193
[GROWLS]
714
00:43:02,554 --> 00:43:04,513
I found the shorts.
715
00:43:05,274 --> 00:43:06,793
[DAFFY YELLS]
716
00:43:08,594 --> 00:43:10,833
The pain.
717
00:43:11,194 --> 00:43:14,273
- I'm right behind you, pal.
- Uh, that's none too reassuring.
718
00:43:14,434 --> 00:43:16,753
Nice puppy. How's about a bone?
719
00:43:17,714 --> 00:43:20,833
- No dice.
- What about a nice holiday ham?
720
00:43:20,994 --> 00:43:23,833
- He ain't buying it. Can't we talk this over?
- Down, Beethoven.
721
00:43:23,994 --> 00:43:26,353
Ooh. The kids are here.
722
00:43:28,755 --> 00:43:30,954
Give it to me, Charles.
723
00:43:33,915 --> 00:43:36,194
- Here you go, Bugs.
- Thanks, kid.
724
00:43:36,475 --> 00:43:37,474
Shoo. Shoo.
725
00:43:37,635 --> 00:43:38,634
[WHIMPERS]
726
00:43:38,795 --> 00:43:44,314
Bad dog. That is the last time
I'm ever working with dogs or children.
727
00:43:44,475 --> 00:43:46,674
- Bye-bye.
- Hey, where you going?
728
00:43:46,835 --> 00:43:50,234
Well, uh, you see, the Looney Tunes have
a big basketball game coming up...
729
00:43:50,395 --> 00:43:53,715
...and, uh, your dad's gonna play.
- All right.
730
00:43:53,875 --> 00:43:56,035
Yeah. But don't tell anybody.
731
00:43:57,035 --> 00:43:58,274
[DOOR CLOSES]
732
00:43:58,555 --> 00:44:00,155
[PSYCHIC HUMMING]
733
00:44:12,156 --> 00:44:14,075
I see aliens.
734
00:44:14,236 --> 00:44:17,475
Little aliens from outer space.
735
00:44:17,636 --> 00:44:20,555
They forced their way inside your bodies.
736
00:44:20,716 --> 00:44:25,916
They need your talent
to win a basketball game against...
737
00:44:26,077 --> 00:44:27,875
...Bugs Bunny.
PATRICK [WHISPERS]: Bugs Bunny?
738
00:44:28,036 --> 00:44:34,036
I also see Michael Jordan
being sucked down a golf hole...
739
00:44:34,196 --> 00:44:35,636
...by furry creatures.
740
00:44:35,797 --> 00:44:38,876
- That's it. We're out of here.
- We're leaving now.
741
00:44:39,037 --> 00:44:41,956
- Let's try some acupuncture.
- Good idea. Bye.
742
00:44:42,237 --> 00:44:44,796
STAN:
This is it. This is it.
743
00:44:44,957 --> 00:44:47,636
I don't know where you are, Michael,
but wherever you are...
744
00:44:47,797 --> 00:44:51,196
...you obviously enjoy being there
more than spending time with me.
745
00:44:51,357 --> 00:44:54,717
You better hope this Jordan character
still know how to play hoops.
746
00:44:54,878 --> 00:44:56,637
BUGS:
You and me both, brother.
747
00:44:56,798 --> 00:44:59,716
DAFFY:
Listen, how is this for a new team name:
748
00:44:59,877 --> 00:45:02,196
- The Ducks.
BUGS: Please.
749
00:45:02,357 --> 00:45:05,917
What kind of Mickey Mouse organization
would name their team the Ducks?
750
00:45:06,078 --> 00:45:08,797
DAFFY:
So sue me. It's just a suggestion.
751
00:45:08,958 --> 00:45:10,557
[BUGS HUMMING]
752
00:45:13,398 --> 00:45:14,717
You're doing it.
753
00:45:14,878 --> 00:45:15,997
You're becoming mighty.
754
00:45:16,158 --> 00:45:18,757
- Go!
PORKY: Come on, guys. No pain, no gain.
755
00:45:18,918 --> 00:45:20,997
I don't hear it. What is it?
756
00:45:21,558 --> 00:45:23,637
FOGHORN: Come on.
- Come on.
757
00:45:24,598 --> 00:45:26,997
- Eh, guys?
ALL: Yes?
758
00:45:27,158 --> 00:45:30,477
Look who's finally ready to play.
759
00:45:36,878 --> 00:45:38,638
Let's see if I remember how to do this.
760
00:45:45,399 --> 00:45:46,638
Nice.
761
00:46:05,240 --> 00:46:06,518
[CLAPPING]
762
00:46:06,679 --> 00:46:08,158
[CHUCKLES]
763
00:46:08,640 --> 00:46:09,719
Michael!
764
00:46:11,920 --> 00:46:14,998
Is it really you? Oh!
765
00:46:15,160 --> 00:46:20,199
Thank God you're all right.
Oh! I was so worried.
766
00:46:20,360 --> 00:46:22,879
Come on, Stan. Don't hug me, please.
767
00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:24,440
- Sorry.
- What are you doing here?
768
00:46:24,600 --> 00:46:26,760
I gotta take you back.
You got baseball practice.
769
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:30,359
I can't. I'm helping my friends
in their basketball game.
770
00:46:34,200 --> 00:46:36,880
Michael, you know that your friends
are cartoon characters?
771
00:46:38,360 --> 00:46:40,239
Yeah. So?
772
00:46:40,400 --> 00:46:44,720
Doesn't bother you, it doesn't bother me.
Let me help. Let me help. I can help.
773
00:46:44,881 --> 00:46:46,800
- What can you do?
- Well, you know, I mean...
774
00:46:46,960 --> 00:46:50,000
...I may not be very tall, but I'm slow.
775
00:46:50,161 --> 00:46:52,760
- And large.
- And a dork.
776
00:46:52,921 --> 00:46:54,920
I'll do anything, Michael. Anything.
777
00:46:55,081 --> 00:46:57,600
- Anything?
- Anything.
778
00:46:58,722 --> 00:47:01,360
Come here. Come here for a second.
779
00:47:01,921 --> 00:47:03,641
- Sit right here.
- Okay.
780
00:47:03,802 --> 00:47:05,520
- Okay?
- Okay. No problem.
781
00:47:05,682 --> 00:47:07,520
All right. All right, let's go, team.
782
00:47:07,681 --> 00:47:09,121
[CHUCKLES]
783
00:47:09,282 --> 00:47:11,761
If somebody gets injured,
we could see a lot of minutes.
784
00:47:11,921 --> 00:47:14,561
I'm a cheerleader.
785
00:47:15,522 --> 00:47:17,321
[SIRENS WAILING]
786
00:47:30,882 --> 00:47:31,841
[CHATTERING]
787
00:47:32,002 --> 00:47:34,762
FOREMAN: Mr. Commissioner,
we've got the place sealed off.
788
00:47:35,082 --> 00:47:39,682
Quiet!
Ladies and gentlemen, please, quiet!
789
00:47:39,843 --> 00:47:43,282
Listen. After meeting with team owners,
I have decided...
790
00:47:43,443 --> 00:47:47,522
...that until we can guarantee the health
and safety of our NBA players...
791
00:47:47,683 --> 00:47:50,762
...there will be no more basketball
this season.
792
00:47:50,923 --> 00:47:52,762
[SHOUTING]
793
00:47:55,443 --> 00:47:57,362
[HORNS HONKING]
794
00:48:01,603 --> 00:48:03,482
[CROWD CHEERING]
795
00:48:11,883 --> 00:48:12,883
Yes.
796
00:48:18,443 --> 00:48:20,163
[GROWLING]
797
00:48:28,364 --> 00:48:30,843
Just get out of my way.
798
00:48:37,205 --> 00:48:38,723
- Ready?
ALL: Yes!
799
00:48:39,245 --> 00:48:40,484
Let's go.
800
00:48:46,164 --> 00:48:47,564
Are these the best seats?
801
00:48:47,725 --> 00:48:49,563
Like them. Yes.
802
00:48:49,724 --> 00:48:53,123
Can see everything from here.
Very good.
803
00:48:54,285 --> 00:48:55,924
[SNORING]
804
00:48:59,925 --> 00:49:03,324
- Ready to go?
- Yeah, yeah, sure, sure. Riot.
805
00:49:03,485 --> 00:49:04,885
[CLEARS THROAT]
806
00:49:05,245 --> 00:49:08,325
[IN DEEP VOICE]
Ladies and gentlemen...
807
00:49:08,485 --> 00:49:12,764
...the starting lineup for the Tune Squad.
808
00:49:12,925 --> 00:49:14,605
[CHEERING]
809
00:49:14,766 --> 00:49:19,884
Standing 2-foot-4,
The Wonder From Down Under...
810
00:49:20,046 --> 00:49:23,325
...the Tazmanian Devil.
811
00:49:26,806 --> 00:49:32,445
At small forward,
standing a scintillating 3-foot-2...
812
00:49:32,606 --> 00:49:37,686
...The Heartthrob of the Hoops,
Lola Bunny.
813
00:49:40,446 --> 00:49:46,085
At power forward,
The Quackster of the Courts, Daffy Duck.
814
00:49:46,246 --> 00:49:48,086
DAFFY:
Thank you. Thank you.
815
00:49:48,247 --> 00:49:49,406
[CRICKETS CHIRPING]
816
00:49:49,567 --> 00:49:50,725
[MAN COUGHS]
817
00:49:50,886 --> 00:49:54,406
Very funny. Let's all laugh at the duck.
818
00:49:54,566 --> 00:50:00,446
And at point guard, standing 3-foot-3,
4 feet if you include the ears...
819
00:50:00,607 --> 00:50:04,366
...co-captain of the Tune Squad...
820
00:50:04,527 --> 00:50:07,526
...The Doctor of Delight, Bugs Bunny.
821
00:50:07,687 --> 00:50:09,286
Thank you. Thank you.
822
00:50:11,727 --> 00:50:16,087
And now,
the player-coach of the Tune Squad...
823
00:50:16,687 --> 00:50:19,727
...at 6-foot-6, from North Carolina...
824
00:50:19,888 --> 00:50:26,207
...His Royal Airness, Michael Jordan.
825
00:50:29,288 --> 00:50:31,607
Who? Is he a Looney Tune?
826
00:50:31,768 --> 00:50:33,767
Uh... Uh, well, perhaps.
827
00:50:37,128 --> 00:50:39,567
- You guys ready?
- I'm set to take it to the rack, Jack.
828
00:50:39,728 --> 00:50:42,008
Those Monstars
will wish they'd never been born.
829
00:50:42,168 --> 00:50:44,888
- Guys, let's just go out and have fun.
ALL: Yeah!
830
00:50:45,048 --> 00:50:48,327
ANNOUNCER:
The challengers for the Ultimate Game...
831
00:50:48,488 --> 00:50:51,927
...all the way from Moron Mountain:
832
00:50:52,089 --> 00:50:57,647
The Monstars.
833
00:51:00,408 --> 00:51:03,168
Go Monstars! Go Monstars!
Go Monstars!
834
00:51:03,969 --> 00:51:05,688
[CROWD BOOING]
835
00:51:07,089 --> 00:51:08,808
[GROWLS]
836
00:51:11,049 --> 00:51:13,129
What are you looking at?
837
00:51:13,289 --> 00:51:14,408
[GROWLS]
838
00:51:19,130 --> 00:51:20,328
[BLANKO CHUCKLES]
839
00:51:20,490 --> 00:51:22,129
Cool shoes.
840
00:51:24,009 --> 00:51:25,528
Uh...
841
00:51:26,170 --> 00:51:27,529
Ready?
842
00:51:28,010 --> 00:51:29,809
[HORN BLARES]
843
00:51:32,730 --> 00:51:35,049
I got it, I got it, I got it.
I got the ball. I got the ball.
844
00:51:35,210 --> 00:51:36,649
Yipe!
845
00:51:37,130 --> 00:51:38,129
Ooh.
846
00:51:43,490 --> 00:51:46,290
Way to go, boys.
Did you see the moves on that one?
847
00:51:47,050 --> 00:51:50,410
BANG: Come on, show me something.
Come on, show me something.
848
00:51:53,451 --> 00:51:55,129
- Whoops.
- The duck.
849
00:51:55,290 --> 00:51:57,410
BUPKUS:
Yeah, beat up on the duck.
850
00:52:02,411 --> 00:52:03,770
Oh, my.
851
00:52:03,931 --> 00:52:05,930
She was wide open.
852
00:52:06,731 --> 00:52:08,370
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
853
00:52:16,371 --> 00:52:18,570
NAWT: Watch it, coming your way.
Watch out, watch out.
854
00:52:19,851 --> 00:52:20,851
BANG:
Get him.
855
00:52:25,611 --> 00:52:27,490
How did he do that?
856
00:52:28,731 --> 00:52:31,531
- Nice shot, Mr. J.
- Hey, hey, come on. Get back on defense.
857
00:52:33,251 --> 00:52:34,731
Way to go!
858
00:52:34,891 --> 00:52:36,091
Air J! Air J!
859
00:52:37,292 --> 00:52:38,291
[BELL RINGING]
860
00:52:38,451 --> 00:52:39,451
MONSTARS:
Red light.
861
00:52:39,612 --> 00:52:43,372
- Feed me. Feed me.
- Feed you? Feed me.
862
00:52:46,732 --> 00:52:49,091
- Bad old putty tat.
POUND: I'll take that, thank you.
863
00:52:50,172 --> 00:52:52,651
Don't try this at home.
864
00:52:53,692 --> 00:52:55,771
[SINGING]
I wish I was in the land of cott...
865
00:52:55,932 --> 00:52:57,531
You going somewhere?
866
00:52:57,692 --> 00:53:02,092
May I remind you, sir, that physical
violence is patently against the rules.
867
00:53:02,253 --> 00:53:07,572
Yeow! Did you order Original Recipe
or Extra Crispy?
868
00:53:07,733 --> 00:53:09,412
[HORN BLARES]
869
00:53:11,133 --> 00:53:12,852
- Let's go.
- Me?
870
00:53:13,013 --> 00:53:16,252
- Oh, boy. I'm ready. I can do this.
- The mouse? You picked the mouse?
871
00:53:16,413 --> 00:53:18,613
- I love basketball. I always have. Do you?
- Uh-huh.
872
00:53:18,773 --> 00:53:20,813
- You're big. I bet you're good.
- Right.
873
00:53:20,973 --> 00:53:22,532
I'm small, but I'll try hard to be good.
874
00:53:22,693 --> 00:53:25,092
- Okay. Yeah.
- Really, I will. I always try hard.
875
00:53:25,253 --> 00:53:27,493
My mom says,
"Try your best at everything you do..."
876
00:53:27,654 --> 00:53:29,212
CROWD:
Oh!
877
00:53:30,613 --> 00:53:32,693
Try to get by me, doll.
878
00:53:32,854 --> 00:53:34,453
"Doll"?
879
00:53:38,933 --> 00:53:41,613
Don't ever call me "doll."
880
00:53:41,774 --> 00:53:43,373
- Nice shot.
- Thanks, Bugs.
881
00:53:43,534 --> 00:53:44,653
Hmm?
882
00:53:44,814 --> 00:53:47,653
Where's the defense, boy?
I got you right here.
883
00:53:48,454 --> 00:53:50,533
911.
884
00:53:50,694 --> 00:53:53,693
Piece of pie? Pork chop?
Some sorbet, perhaps?
885
00:54:05,775 --> 00:54:07,214
[YELLS]
886
00:54:09,534 --> 00:54:10,534
Half-time.
887
00:54:10,695 --> 00:54:12,174
[HORN BLARES]
888
00:54:12,895 --> 00:54:14,214
Holy putty tat.
889
00:54:15,895 --> 00:54:18,174
BUPKUS: Yeah, man, we got it going on.
One more half.
890
00:54:18,335 --> 00:54:19,974
POUND:
Right, man. We got them.
891
00:54:20,135 --> 00:54:22,214
Moron Mountain, here we come.
892
00:54:22,375 --> 00:54:24,295
We're gonna be slaves.
893
00:54:24,456 --> 00:54:27,534
Come on, guys, keep your head up.
Got a whole other half to play.
894
00:54:29,455 --> 00:54:30,615
[CHATTERING]
895
00:54:34,416 --> 00:54:36,095
[GRUNTING]
896
00:54:40,935 --> 00:54:43,015
It's the boss.
897
00:54:43,176 --> 00:54:45,695
ALL:
Hello, Mr. Swackhammer.
898
00:54:45,856 --> 00:54:47,295
All right.
899
00:54:47,456 --> 00:54:50,735
Not bad for the first half,
but we gotta keep this up.
900
00:54:50,896 --> 00:54:52,016
No problem. We stole...
901
00:54:52,176 --> 00:54:54,375
We stole talent from the best players
in the NBA.
902
00:54:54,536 --> 00:54:56,575
From the NBA.
903
00:54:56,736 --> 00:54:58,215
[BLABBERING]
904
00:54:58,376 --> 00:54:59,696
Shut up.
905
00:54:59,856 --> 00:55:00,855
[SNIFFS]
906
00:55:01,016 --> 00:55:02,895
I smell something.
907
00:55:03,056 --> 00:55:04,176
[SNIFFS]
908
00:55:04,337 --> 00:55:06,376
Uh, we have been playing really hard.
909
00:55:06,537 --> 00:55:08,775
- Yeah.
- Not you, you idiot.
910
00:55:10,817 --> 00:55:13,136
It's coming from over here.
911
00:55:13,296 --> 00:55:14,296
POUND:
That locker.
912
00:55:17,377 --> 00:55:18,936
- Look.
- Aah!
913
00:55:19,097 --> 00:55:22,057
- It's the chubby boy.
- Ah.
914
00:55:22,217 --> 00:55:25,856
It smells like a spy.
915
00:55:26,018 --> 00:55:27,496
[CHUCKLING]
916
00:55:28,218 --> 00:55:31,536
You guys need a publicist?
I can make you big. Ha, ha.
917
00:55:31,817 --> 00:55:33,857
- I know we're down.
DAFFY: Yeah. Let's hear the story.
918
00:55:34,017 --> 00:55:36,137
But I've been in this situation
many times before.
919
00:55:36,298 --> 00:55:39,496
We can still win this thing.
It's not over with. We gotta come together.
920
00:55:39,657 --> 00:55:41,617
We gotta believe in ourselves.
We can win this game.
921
00:55:41,778 --> 00:55:43,297
DAFFY:
Yeah, right. That's gonna help us.
922
00:55:43,458 --> 00:55:44,457
[KNOCKING]
923
00:55:45,458 --> 00:55:46,577
[MOANING]
924
00:55:46,738 --> 00:55:49,777
Looks like Stan just had
a close encounter with a bug-zapper.
925
00:55:50,898 --> 00:55:53,817
Monstars. The Monstars.
926
00:55:57,538 --> 00:56:00,097
DAFFY: Ooh. That's gotta hurt.
- You all right, Stan?
927
00:56:00,258 --> 00:56:01,938
The Monst...
928
00:56:02,379 --> 00:56:06,458
The Monstars stole the talent
from the NBA players.
929
00:56:06,619 --> 00:56:07,978
[ALL GASP]
930
00:56:08,139 --> 00:56:09,257
[ALL GROAN]
931
00:56:09,938 --> 00:56:11,857
So that's what happened to those guys.
932
00:56:12,018 --> 00:56:15,618
I think we should qui... Forfeit.
933
00:56:15,779 --> 00:56:17,578
ALL: Yeah.
- I didn't get dragged down here...
934
00:56:17,739 --> 00:56:20,338
...just to get my butt whipped
by a bunch of ugly Monstars.
935
00:56:20,499 --> 00:56:23,258
I ain't going out like that.
We're letting them push us around.
936
00:56:23,419 --> 00:56:24,538
[BUGS HUMMING]
937
00:56:24,699 --> 00:56:28,338
We gotta fight them back. We gotta take it
to them. We gotta get right in their faces.
938
00:56:29,739 --> 00:56:31,378
What do you say?
939
00:56:31,939 --> 00:56:33,899
Are you with me or not?
940
00:56:34,060 --> 00:56:35,819
[SNORING]
941
00:56:39,059 --> 00:56:42,099
Finished? Great speech and all, doc.
You had them riveted.
942
00:56:42,260 --> 00:56:45,099
- But, uh, didn't you forget something?
- What?
943
00:56:45,780 --> 00:56:47,658
Your secret stuff.
944
00:56:47,820 --> 00:56:49,139
[GULPING]
945
00:56:54,940 --> 00:56:56,019
Wow.
946
00:56:56,340 --> 00:56:58,219
Whoa, nice deltoids.
947
00:56:58,380 --> 00:57:00,019
Play along.
948
00:57:01,221 --> 00:57:04,019
Uh, stop hogging it, Mike.
We're your teammates.
949
00:57:04,180 --> 00:57:06,739
Secret stuff?
950
00:57:06,900 --> 00:57:10,500
DAFFY: Secret stuff?
- You wouldn't hold out on us, would you?
951
00:57:10,661 --> 00:57:12,660
No, I mean,
I didn't think you guys really needed it.
952
00:57:12,821 --> 00:57:15,660
I mean, you're so tough.
You're competitive.
953
00:57:15,821 --> 00:57:19,700
We're also chicken, son. We need it bad.
- Hey.
954
00:57:19,861 --> 00:57:22,140
- Uh, I'd like some of that.
LOLA: Could I have a sip, please?
955
00:57:22,301 --> 00:57:25,860
You know, this goes against everything
they taught me in health class.
956
00:57:26,581 --> 00:57:27,740
Do you want to win or not?
957
00:57:27,901 --> 00:57:29,820
Bottoms up.
958
00:57:31,581 --> 00:57:32,580
- Yummy.
- All right.
959
00:57:32,742 --> 00:57:35,380
How about we go out
and kick some alien butt, huh? Let's go.
960
00:57:35,541 --> 00:57:38,741
- How about it? Ready?
TUNES: Yeah!
961
00:57:47,461 --> 00:57:49,541
[GROWLING]
962
00:57:59,982 --> 00:58:01,621
BUGS:
Coming through.
963
00:58:03,702 --> 00:58:04,901
Bugs.
964
00:58:06,102 --> 00:58:07,101
Special delivery.
965
00:58:08,742 --> 00:58:10,582
[CROWD CHEERS]
966
00:58:11,782 --> 00:58:12,782
Boo!
967
00:58:18,742 --> 00:58:21,741
Eh, nice kaboom, Wile E.
968
00:58:36,664 --> 00:58:38,942
Let's teach them a lesson.
969
00:58:43,863 --> 00:58:45,222
Nice butt.
970
00:58:53,344 --> 00:58:55,143
PORKY: Going up.
POUND: You're mine, fool.
971
00:58:57,184 --> 00:58:58,623
Slammy.
972
00:59:00,544 --> 00:59:03,023
Hello.
A little surprise for you, my friends.
973
00:59:03,184 --> 00:59:04,183
[CHUCKLES]
974
00:59:08,984 --> 00:59:10,104
Two points.
975
00:59:19,185 --> 00:59:21,744
Ooh. This will be good.
976
00:59:22,545 --> 00:59:24,104
[LAUGHING]
977
00:59:26,185 --> 00:59:27,624
[GROWLS]
978
00:59:29,265 --> 00:59:30,584
[YELLS]
979
00:59:33,505 --> 00:59:35,144
- Okay, birdie.
- Uh-oh.
980
00:59:36,225 --> 00:59:37,944
[YELLS]
981
00:59:51,305 --> 00:59:53,224
MICHAEL: Yes!
- Time out!
982
00:59:53,385 --> 00:59:54,825
[HORN BLARES]
983
00:59:55,226 --> 00:59:56,985
[WHISTLE BLOWS]
984
00:59:57,346 --> 00:59:59,945
Shut up, you little bug.
Get away from me. Powwow.
985
01:00:00,106 --> 01:00:03,705
All right. We're right back in this game.
Come on, now. Let's play tough defense.
986
01:00:03,866 --> 01:00:05,225
Why didn't you get this guy?
987
01:00:05,786 --> 01:00:08,625
POUND: He's a baseball player.
- Yeah, boss, a baseball player.
988
01:00:08,786 --> 01:00:11,105
Looks like a basketball player to me.
989
01:00:11,266 --> 01:00:12,946
Yeah, me too.
990
01:00:13,106 --> 01:00:16,506
- He's the one I want for Moron Mountain.
- Hey.
991
01:00:18,306 --> 01:00:20,265
Are you talking to me?
992
01:00:20,427 --> 01:00:23,506
Yeah, I'm talking to you.
You want a piece of me? Come and get it.
993
01:00:23,666 --> 01:00:24,905
[CHUCKLES]
994
01:00:25,066 --> 01:00:26,386
BLANKO:
Uh-oh.
995
01:00:27,267 --> 01:00:28,786
What did you have in mind?
996
01:00:29,987 --> 01:00:32,066
Hat about we raise the stakes
a little bit?
997
01:00:32,227 --> 01:00:33,626
Hmm.
998
01:00:34,027 --> 01:00:35,546
Interesting.
999
01:00:35,707 --> 01:00:38,706
If we win, you give the NBA
players their talent back.
1000
01:00:38,868 --> 01:00:40,746
But what if we win?
1001
01:00:42,107 --> 01:00:43,746
- If you win?
- Uh-huh.
1002
01:00:44,348 --> 01:00:45,307
You get me.
1003
01:00:45,467 --> 01:00:46,507
Good deal, boss.
1004
01:00:46,987 --> 01:00:48,906
Doc, you think that's a good ide...?
1005
01:00:52,108 --> 01:00:54,266
SWACKHAMMER:
You'll be our star attraction.
1006
01:00:55,548 --> 01:00:58,027
You'll sign autographs all day long.
1007
01:00:59,388 --> 01:01:01,907
And play one-on-one
with the paying customers.
1008
01:01:03,308 --> 01:01:04,307
[LAUGHS]
1009
01:01:04,668 --> 01:01:07,307
And you'll always lose.
1010
01:01:08,909 --> 01:01:11,067
Do we have a deal?
1011
01:01:14,428 --> 01:01:16,028
Deal.
1012
01:01:16,188 --> 01:01:17,187
NAWT:
All right.
1013
01:01:17,348 --> 01:01:18,908
[CROWD MURMURING]
1014
01:01:21,828 --> 01:01:24,228
I don't think you should have
done that, doc.
1015
01:01:24,389 --> 01:01:25,988
I have faith in my team.
1016
01:01:27,949 --> 01:01:28,947
Crush them.
1017
01:01:30,829 --> 01:01:32,507
POUND:
Feeding time, boys.
1018
01:01:36,949 --> 01:01:39,108
[BABBLES THEN YELLS]
1019
01:01:39,509 --> 01:01:40,668
POUND:
Goodbye.
1020
01:01:42,749 --> 01:01:43,869
[MICHAEL GRUNTS]
1021
01:01:47,869 --> 01:01:48,868
Fore.
1022
01:01:49,029 --> 01:01:50,508
[YELLS]
1023
01:01:54,430 --> 01:01:57,628
But, Mommy,
I don't want to go to school today.
1024
01:01:58,670 --> 01:02:03,228
I want to stay home
and bake cookies with you.
1025
01:02:04,270 --> 01:02:05,269
[POUND CHUCKLES]
1026
01:02:05,429 --> 01:02:07,749
LOLA: I'm open, I'm open.
- Lola, Lola, heads up.
1027
01:02:08,230 --> 01:02:10,309
LOLA: Oh!
POUND: Belly flop.
1028
01:02:11,990 --> 01:02:13,029
[GASPS]
1029
01:02:13,190 --> 01:02:14,669
LOLA:
Oh, my. Bugs!
1030
01:02:15,510 --> 01:02:17,629
- Bugs!
- Is this your man?
1031
01:02:17,790 --> 01:02:19,230
[POUND CHUCKLES]
1032
01:02:19,391 --> 01:02:20,750
Are you okay?
1033
01:02:20,911 --> 01:02:23,029
Me? Oh, yeah. I'm fine.
1034
01:02:23,191 --> 01:02:24,789
Are you okay?
1035
01:02:24,950 --> 01:02:27,070
Oh, Bugs. Thank you.
1036
01:02:27,230 --> 01:02:28,909
Aw, it was nothing.
1037
01:02:29,590 --> 01:02:33,470
That was the nicest thing anyone's
ever done for me.
1038
01:02:37,751 --> 01:02:38,750
Time out.
1039
01:02:38,911 --> 01:02:40,350
[WHISTLE BLOWS AND HORN BLARES]
1040
01:02:40,511 --> 01:02:42,031
[GROANING]
1041
01:02:42,271 --> 01:02:44,990
PLAYER:
I could have been a contender.
1042
01:02:45,151 --> 01:02:46,831
The Monstars. The Monstars.
1043
01:02:46,991 --> 01:02:49,590
PLAYER: I could have had a...
- Clear!
1044
01:03:03,832 --> 01:03:05,151
Okay.
1045
01:03:06,591 --> 01:03:09,311
- We need a fifth player.
- Hey, coach, listen.
1046
01:03:09,471 --> 01:03:12,551
You got any more secret stuff?
I think it's starting to wear off.
1047
01:03:12,712 --> 01:03:14,991
It didn't wear off. It was just water.
1048
01:03:15,152 --> 01:03:17,751
You guys had the special stuff
inside of you all along.
1049
01:03:18,552 --> 01:03:20,991
Yeah, yeah, I knew that.
But listen, you got any more?
1050
01:03:21,233 --> 01:03:24,591
LOLA: I'll take some.
PORKY: Yeah, uh, can I have some too?
1051
01:03:25,913 --> 01:03:27,232
- Stan?
- Me?
1052
01:03:28,753 --> 01:03:30,392
You're in at center.
1053
01:03:30,553 --> 01:03:31,872
Just guard the big guy, okay?
1054
01:03:32,033 --> 01:03:34,272
Guard him? Guard him? I'll smother him.
1055
01:03:34,432 --> 01:03:38,432
I'll be all over him like a cheap suit.
I'll be on him like stink on rice.
1056
01:03:38,593 --> 01:03:39,832
I tell you, he's going down.
1057
01:03:46,433 --> 01:03:49,312
Michael, over here. Over here.
Over here, I'm open.
1058
01:03:57,673 --> 01:03:58,913
Yes!
1059
01:04:00,874 --> 01:04:02,393
Ha, ha. Nice sho...!
1060
01:04:02,553 --> 01:04:05,273
BANG:
Big man pancake.
1061
01:04:06,514 --> 01:04:07,632
ALL:
Ooh.
1062
01:04:08,713 --> 01:04:10,073
[SIREN WAILING]
1063
01:04:10,233 --> 01:04:12,353
Let's get him out of here.
1064
01:04:31,715 --> 01:04:33,394
Eew.
1065
01:04:34,435 --> 01:04:35,834
Oh, my.
1066
01:04:38,634 --> 01:04:40,354
[CROWD CLAPPING]
1067
01:04:42,594 --> 01:04:43,754
How'd he do that?
1068
01:04:43,915 --> 01:04:46,594
Aw, anybody could do that, doc.
Even you.
1069
01:04:46,755 --> 01:04:48,834
Watch this.
1070
01:04:49,195 --> 01:04:51,994
No sweat. This is Looney Tune Land.
1071
01:04:55,395 --> 01:04:58,554
Ten seconds to go?
Thanks for telling me, doc.
1072
01:04:58,715 --> 01:05:01,954
I hate to be the bearer of bad news,
Your Airness...
1073
01:05:02,115 --> 01:05:06,474
...but if you don't find a fifth player,
your team will forfeit the game.
1074
01:05:06,635 --> 01:05:09,155
- Forfeit?
- Precisely, Sir Altitude.
1075
01:05:09,516 --> 01:05:11,274
No way. We'll find someone.
1076
01:05:11,436 --> 01:05:13,555
[HUMS FANFARE]
1077
01:05:16,116 --> 01:05:17,155
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
1078
01:05:17,316 --> 01:05:19,435
I didn't know Dan Aykroyd
was in this picture.
1079
01:05:19,956 --> 01:05:21,315
Hey.
1080
01:05:21,956 --> 01:05:24,435
Perhaps I could be of some assistance.
1081
01:05:25,357 --> 01:05:27,075
That's our fifth guy.
1082
01:05:27,236 --> 01:05:29,876
Thanks, Bill.
Now you get to live your dream. Let's go.
1083
01:05:30,037 --> 01:05:31,755
- All right.
- All right.
1084
01:05:31,917 --> 01:05:34,155
- We need to score two points...
- Here's how I see it.
1085
01:05:34,316 --> 01:05:35,356
- Duck.
- Yes.
1086
01:05:35,517 --> 01:05:38,275
- Kick it to the girl bunny down in the post.
LOLA: Yeah?
1087
01:05:38,436 --> 01:05:40,355
- You dish it back to the guy bunny.
- Got it.
1088
01:05:40,517 --> 01:05:42,916
- You swing it to Mike. You go to the hole.
- Bill.
1089
01:05:43,076 --> 01:05:44,995
- And dominate.
- We're on defense.
1090
01:05:45,157 --> 01:05:48,436
- Oh, yeah.
- Whoa. I don't play defense.
1091
01:05:48,597 --> 01:05:50,716
- Typical.
- Gonna have to listen to Mike on this.
1092
01:05:50,877 --> 01:05:55,356
Okay. Somebody steal the ball, get it to me
and I'll score before the time runs out.
1093
01:05:56,157 --> 01:05:57,916
Don't lose that confidence. Okay.
1094
01:05:58,077 --> 01:06:00,516
- Paws and wings in here. Okay.
ALL: Yes!
1095
01:06:02,118 --> 01:06:03,836
[CHEERING]
1096
01:06:06,317 --> 01:06:08,237
This is why I was born.
1097
01:06:08,398 --> 01:06:10,157
I thrive on pressure.
1098
01:06:10,318 --> 01:06:13,717
- Excuse me, uh, sorry.
- Yo, yo, easy on the trousers, Daf. Easy.
1099
01:06:13,878 --> 01:06:17,157
Pardon me. Mr. Murray,
something's really been bugging me.
1100
01:06:17,318 --> 01:06:19,957
- Yeah?
- Just how did you get here anyway?
1101
01:06:21,318 --> 01:06:24,237
Producer's a friend of mine.
Just had a teamster come and drop me off.
1102
01:06:24,398 --> 01:06:25,957
Uh-huh.
1103
01:06:26,118 --> 01:06:27,237
Well, that's how it goes.
1104
01:06:27,958 --> 01:06:30,358
Hey, you see this, uh, kind of chunky
fellow over here?
1105
01:06:30,519 --> 01:06:31,557
[POUND CHUCKLES]
1106
01:06:32,038 --> 01:06:33,437
Uh-huh.
1107
01:06:33,598 --> 01:06:35,197
[WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY]
1108
01:06:35,598 --> 01:06:38,878
- Oh. Oh, that's good. Oh, yes.
- Let's do it. You the duck.
1109
01:06:39,119 --> 01:06:41,917
Now, let's all play fair. Here.
1110
01:06:42,078 --> 01:06:43,918
Yo, spaceman. Don't choke now.
Come on.
1111
01:06:44,079 --> 01:06:46,157
It's gut-check time.
1112
01:06:49,759 --> 01:06:51,998
BILL:
This must be mine. Woo-hoo!
1113
01:06:52,159 --> 01:06:55,158
This belongs to me.
I'm going this way. I'm going left.
1114
01:06:55,319 --> 01:06:57,838
Whoa! Don't ever trust an Earthling.
1115
01:07:00,879 --> 01:07:01,878
LOLA:
Mike!
1116
01:07:03,000 --> 01:07:05,319
POUND:
Get the rabbit. Get the girl.
1117
01:07:05,480 --> 01:07:06,959
Come on, come on. I'm open.
1118
01:07:07,559 --> 01:07:08,518
I'm op...!
1119
01:07:09,119 --> 01:07:10,878
- That's mine.
- Not today.
1120
01:07:11,360 --> 01:07:13,719
BUPKUS: Hey.
BLANKO: Bring it on, dude.
1121
01:07:13,879 --> 01:07:16,198
BILL:
Whoopsie-daisy.
1122
01:07:17,280 --> 01:07:18,879
You're mine.
1123
01:07:26,960 --> 01:07:28,239
Mike, I'm open!
1124
01:07:30,560 --> 01:07:31,680
Never mind.
1125
01:07:35,361 --> 01:07:37,160
[GROWLING]
1126
01:07:55,881 --> 01:07:57,000
[HORN BLARES]
1127
01:07:57,161 --> 01:07:58,160
[CHEERING]
1128
01:07:58,441 --> 01:07:59,440
[YELLS]
1129
01:08:01,241 --> 01:08:02,320
[LAUGHING]
1130
01:08:05,562 --> 01:08:07,280
The Tunes win!
1131
01:08:12,441 --> 01:08:13,601
That was a nice pass, man.
1132
01:08:13,762 --> 01:08:15,801
That was a great stretch
for the basket too.
1133
01:08:15,962 --> 01:08:19,560
You know, you really got some skills.
You might be able to play in the NBA.
1134
01:08:20,241 --> 01:08:22,841
Thanks, Mike.
I'll probably quote you on that.
1135
01:08:23,001 --> 01:08:25,961
But I'm gonna take this opportunity
to retire from the game.
1136
01:08:26,122 --> 01:08:27,681
- No, come on.
- No.
1137
01:08:27,842 --> 01:08:30,001
No, I'm gonna retire right now.
That's all there is to it.
1138
01:08:30,162 --> 01:08:32,681
I'm gonna go out on top,
undefeated and untied.
1139
01:08:32,842 --> 01:08:34,201
That's the way it's gonna be.
1140
01:08:34,363 --> 01:08:36,761
- You go celebrate with your team.
- Come help us, man.
1141
01:08:36,922 --> 01:08:41,561
I'd like to, but I have to ice down my knees
right away, okay? They're starting to go.
1142
01:08:41,723 --> 01:08:44,322
- All right. Goodbye, man.
- All right, see you.
1143
01:08:45,802 --> 01:08:49,321
- Are you sure?
- Yes. Definitely sure. Definitely.
1144
01:08:50,243 --> 01:08:51,682
- Losers.
MONSTARS: Sorry.
1145
01:08:51,843 --> 01:08:53,402
- Choke artists.
- Sorry again.
1146
01:08:53,563 --> 01:08:56,321
Wait till I get you back
on Moron Mountain.
1147
01:08:56,483 --> 01:08:57,482
[YELLS]
1148
01:08:57,643 --> 01:09:00,762
All right. The party's over.
Get in the spaceship.
1149
01:09:00,923 --> 01:09:02,442
Why do you take it from this guy?
1150
01:09:02,603 --> 01:09:04,842
Because he's bigger.
1151
01:09:05,003 --> 01:09:06,242
He's bigger?
1152
01:09:06,403 --> 01:09:08,842
Than we used to be.
1153
01:09:10,123 --> 01:09:11,482
What are you doing?
1154
01:09:12,403 --> 01:09:14,882
- Wait. What are you doing? Wait.
POUND: Come here.
1155
01:09:18,204 --> 01:09:19,203
[MONSTARS LAUGHING]
1156
01:09:24,124 --> 01:09:25,643
[YELLS]
1157
01:09:30,323 --> 01:09:32,243
Had it in you all the time, didn't you?
1158
01:09:34,284 --> 01:09:36,923
One thing, though.
Pass me the ball, Bugs.
1159
01:09:37,084 --> 01:09:38,763
You gotta give my friends
their talent back.
1160
01:09:39,564 --> 01:09:41,363
Do we have to?
1161
01:09:41,524 --> 01:09:44,004
Yeah, it's part of the deal.
Touch the ball.
1162
01:09:45,805 --> 01:09:48,004
Oh, okay.
1163
01:09:48,164 --> 01:09:50,884
BLANKO: Fair is fair.
- There you go. Touch it.
1164
01:09:57,645 --> 01:09:59,244
That was so much fun.
1165
01:09:59,404 --> 01:10:01,884
I feel so insignificant.
1166
01:10:02,045 --> 01:10:03,724
My clothes don't fit.
1167
01:10:03,885 --> 01:10:06,204
- What a trip.
- Ha, ha. I'm up for another one.
1168
01:10:06,365 --> 01:10:08,764
Can we ask you a favor, Mr. Bunny?
1169
01:10:08,925 --> 01:10:11,004
We don't want to go back
to Moron Mountain.
1170
01:10:11,166 --> 01:10:14,084
- We hate it up there.
- It stinks.
1171
01:10:14,245 --> 01:10:17,244
Um, I was thinking,
could we stay here with you?
1172
01:10:17,405 --> 01:10:19,005
ALL:
Please.
1173
01:10:19,165 --> 01:10:20,564
Oh, brother.
1174
01:10:20,726 --> 01:10:23,004
Eh, I don't know if you guys
are looney enough.
1175
01:10:23,165 --> 01:10:24,524
Looney enough?
1176
01:10:24,686 --> 01:10:26,805
[HUMMING "LOONEY TUNES" THEME]
1177
01:10:31,365 --> 01:10:33,045
Michael, do you know what time it is?
1178
01:10:33,206 --> 01:10:36,325
Seven-fift... Seven-fift... Quarter past 7.
1179
01:10:36,486 --> 01:10:39,085
Exactly. You've got a baseball game
in five minutes.
1180
01:10:39,246 --> 01:10:41,045
Okay. Take this.
1181
01:10:42,126 --> 01:10:44,646
- Is it safe?
- Yeah, put it in my bag.
1182
01:10:44,806 --> 01:10:47,125
Okay. Let's go.
1183
01:10:47,286 --> 01:10:49,085
I really enjoyed playing with you guys.
1184
01:10:49,246 --> 01:10:50,766
You guys got a lot of, uh...
1185
01:10:51,887 --> 01:10:53,366
- A lot of, uh...
TUNES: Yes?
1186
01:10:53,527 --> 01:10:55,606
Well, whatever it is, you got a lot of it.
1187
01:10:55,766 --> 01:10:57,486
[CHATTERING AND CHUCKLING]
1188
01:10:58,207 --> 01:11:00,046
All right. Gotta go.
1189
01:11:00,566 --> 01:11:02,126
- Bugs.
- Eh, Mike.
1190
01:11:02,287 --> 01:11:05,686
- Stay out of trouble.
- You know I will.
1191
01:11:05,847 --> 01:11:07,566
Come here.
1192
01:11:09,487 --> 01:11:10,926
Woo-hoo!
1193
01:11:11,287 --> 01:11:13,727
CROWD [CHANTING]:
We want Michael! We want Michael!
1194
01:11:14,367 --> 01:11:17,527
The delay is killing us. Where's Michael?
1195
01:11:17,688 --> 01:11:19,246
Where is Michael?
1196
01:11:19,407 --> 01:11:21,326
Oh, he's not back from his other game.
1197
01:11:21,487 --> 01:11:23,206
- What other game?
- Shh.
1198
01:11:23,887 --> 01:11:25,207
Uh-uh. What other game?
1199
01:11:57,969 --> 01:12:00,087
Ladies and gentlemen...
1200
01:12:02,929 --> 01:12:04,568
...Michael Jordan.
1201
01:12:04,729 --> 01:12:06,448
[CROWD CHEERING]
1202
01:12:21,450 --> 01:12:24,169
Guys, we suck.
1203
01:12:24,330 --> 01:12:26,848
Yeah, man.
My grandmother plays better than I do.
1204
01:12:27,009 --> 01:12:30,568
At least you guys are still tall.
I'm nothing now. Just another short guy.
1205
01:12:30,730 --> 01:12:33,968
- You got that right.
- That's the only thing you got right.
1206
01:12:37,330 --> 01:12:38,369
- Who's that?
- Who's that?
1207
01:12:38,530 --> 01:12:41,089
SHAWN: I don't know.
- Been getting your butts kicked?
1208
01:12:41,250 --> 01:12:42,449
MUGGSY: Who's that?
- It's Mike.
1209
01:12:42,610 --> 01:12:43,889
- What's up?
- Why are you here?
1210
01:12:44,050 --> 01:12:47,409
Don't be embarrassed. Just face it.
1211
01:12:47,570 --> 01:12:48,529
You guys stink.
1212
01:12:48,690 --> 01:12:51,370
- Come on, Mike. Lighten up.
- I know, man.
1213
01:12:51,530 --> 01:12:54,409
You want your games back, huh?
What little games you had to begin with.
1214
01:12:54,810 --> 01:12:57,289
- It's hard enough as it is, Mike.
- Give us a break.
1215
01:12:58,211 --> 01:12:59,929
I'm gonna regret this.
1216
01:13:01,130 --> 01:13:02,929
Stan, give me the ball.
1217
01:13:05,331 --> 01:13:06,690
ALL:
Oh.
1218
01:13:07,051 --> 01:13:08,570
Look at that.
1219
01:13:08,731 --> 01:13:10,770
Looks like something from Star Trek.
1220
01:13:11,731 --> 01:13:14,570
- Touch it.
- No way, Jose.
1221
01:13:14,731 --> 01:13:18,210
Pat, you want your talent back?
You don't have any choice. Just touch it.
1222
01:13:19,051 --> 01:13:20,610
- I don't know.
- Don't touch it.
1223
01:13:20,771 --> 01:13:23,851
You're gonna walk around with a bad game
for the rest of your career.
1224
01:13:24,012 --> 01:13:25,610
Touch the ball.
1225
01:13:26,371 --> 01:13:28,251
Careful, Pat.
1226
01:13:29,931 --> 01:13:31,330
We've tried everything else.
1227
01:13:42,131 --> 01:13:44,851
Come on, Charles. Touch it.
1228
01:13:45,012 --> 01:13:47,491
The rest of you guys. Just touch it.
1229
01:13:53,372 --> 01:13:55,851
- What was that?
- I liked that, Mike.
1230
01:13:56,012 --> 01:13:57,852
Hey, I caught it.
1231
01:13:58,293 --> 01:14:00,612
SHAWN: Look at Muggsy handle the rock.
LARRY: Handle it, baby.
1232
01:14:00,773 --> 01:14:03,772
- I can handle that rock again.
LARRY: That's the old Muggs I know.
1233
01:14:03,932 --> 01:14:06,011
PATRICK:
Yeah, get height now.
1234
01:14:06,253 --> 01:14:08,372
It gave me my powers back.
1235
01:14:08,533 --> 01:14:11,092
That wasn't bad.
Let me show you something.
1236
01:14:12,452 --> 01:14:15,212
- The Round Mound is back.
- Want to see something?
1237
01:14:16,853 --> 01:14:19,572
PATRICK:
Oh, man. That felt good.
1238
01:14:21,733 --> 01:14:23,533
SHAWN: I got it.
MUGGSY: You got it. Yeah, baby.
1239
01:14:23,693 --> 01:14:27,452
Hey, Michael. Why don't you stay,
play some three-on-three with us?
1240
01:14:27,613 --> 01:14:29,852
No, I don't think so.
1241
01:14:30,013 --> 01:14:31,893
You gonna work on that baseball swing?
1242
01:14:32,053 --> 01:14:35,892
Leave the baseball player alone.
He doesn't play basketball anymore.
1243
01:14:36,053 --> 01:14:38,133
He probably doesn't even
have it anymore, guys.
1244
01:14:38,294 --> 01:14:40,012
Michael, do you hear them?
1245
01:14:40,173 --> 01:14:42,892
They don't think
you can play the game anymore.
1246
01:14:46,334 --> 01:14:47,973
There's only one way to find out.
1247
01:14:52,214 --> 01:14:55,413
ANNOUNCER:
The Chicago Bulls welcome back...
1248
01:14:55,574 --> 01:15:00,453
...Michael Jordan!
1249
01:15:11,535 --> 01:15:13,654
What's the matter, Bill?
1250
01:15:15,655 --> 01:15:17,774
Larry, that could have been me.
1251
01:15:17,935 --> 01:15:22,614
Will you get off that kick?
It's over. It's done with. You can't play.
1252
01:15:25,535 --> 01:15:26,934
Okay.
1253
01:15:27,815 --> 01:15:30,094
Let's go, Bulls.
1254
01:23:18,030 --> 01:23:20,229
Well, that's all, folks.
1255
01:23:20,390 --> 01:23:22,510
That's my line.
1256
01:23:22,670 --> 01:23:25,670
Step aside, babe. Let a star do this.
1257
01:23:25,830 --> 01:23:27,269
That's all...
1258
01:23:27,431 --> 01:23:29,829
That's all, folks.
1259
01:23:30,790 --> 01:23:32,869
Can I go home now?
1260
01:23:38,511 --> 01:23:40,430
[English - US - SDH]
92133
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