Original subtitles

Dr. Bickman would like to see me in two weeks.

Certainly, Mrs. Rosen. Two weeks, two weeks...

Tuesday the 23rd at 3:30. Would that be all right?

Tuesday, yes, that'll be all right.

I feel terrible.

Thank you, Mrs. Rosen.

Dr. Bickman will see you now.

-Hello, Jackie. -Hello, Dr. Bickman.

I'll be right with you.

Oh, thanks.

Ah, that's a very pretty dress you're wearing.

-Thank you. -Very becoming.

-Here you are. -Thank you.

You're in the best of health?

I am. Thank you.

You have very beautiful skin.

You know, you really ought to be complimented

on the way that you take good care of your skin.

Thank you.

Do you have an appointment?

No.

Well... Well, I'm sorry. Dr. Bickman's schedule is rather full.

That's okay. You see, I had a filling in here

that fell out, you know?

Would you like to make an appointment?

-No. -Dr. Bickman is with a patient.

That's okay. Thank you.

Hey, how you doing?

Just who are you and what are you doing in here?

I'm Mr. Keneely and this here is Mr. Farrel.

-How do you do? -What's the matter with you?

Coming in, barging in here like this?

We'd like to talk to you for a minute.

Don't you see I have a patient?

How you doing? Would you like a stick of gum?

We'd like to talk to you about a girl named Jackie.

Jackie's liable to get you written up in all the dental journals.

There's another office where we can talk.

It's right this way.

-I'll be right back, Mrs. Storch.

You might even get your face on the cover.

Take it easy, Mrs. Storch.

Did you really do it in the chair?

-I don't know what you're talking about.

Look, doctor, please, now wait a minute.

Before we bullshit each other into the middle of next week,

there's a couple of things you gotta know.

First of all, we know who she is.

Jackie? We know why she comes here every Tuesday

and we know what she does when she's here.

-In the chair. -Oh, no, no, no.

How would you know anything about her or me, for that matter?

We've had a tap on her phone for over a month.

Honest.

That's illegal.

I knew we shouldn't have done it.

You got a wastebasket, I can throw my gum in?

Yeah, there's one right over there.

-Doctor? -Yeah.

Listen, we don't wanna make any trouble for you, really.

All we wanna do is get the girl.

Personally, I don't blame you, 'cause she's a knockout.

I'm in love with her, but we do have to nail her.

I think I don't want to answer any of your questions.

Well, look, I'm gonna make a date with her.

I'm gonna tell her I'm a friend of yours.

You're no friend of mine.

Well, I certainly would like to be.

Anyway, she's gonna be calling you up to check me out,

like any smart hooker would, right?

And you're gonna tell her that everything's cool, got it?

I'm not gonna do any such thing.

Listen, do you have a warrant?

-You got a warrant? -I don't have a warrant.

-Do you have a warrant? -No, we don't got a warrant.

Well, then, I think you better get out of here.

Well, we can't do that.

We don't have enough evidence if we leave now for a conviction.

It would be embarrassing if we went

in front of the grand jury without any evidence.

Embarrassing for me, for him,

embarrassing for you, doctor.

Pictures, televisions will all be contacting you.

All right, get out of here.

-No. -Wait a minute.

-I think Dr. Bickman, here, is right. -Huh?

I think we ought to leave and perhaps discuss it

some other time at a more comfortable place.

I think you're quite right.

-Thank you. -You're quite welcome.

Where would we feel more comfortable?

Oh, I don't know.

Maybe the doctor's home with the doctor's wife and children.

Beautiful idea. The man's got class.

Wait. Wait.

All right, all right.

I think you men are despicable.

Oh, and you're a Cub Scout, right?

What time you got?

5:45.

Okay, I'll open the door at 5:55.

You got it.

Nah, make it 6:00. She's sort of cute.

Terrific.

Have a wonderful time.

I'm gonna sit right down here and protect. It's very dangerous work.

How about if I come back tomorrow morning?

Hello, there.

Hey, how you doing?

Hi. Are you Mike?

Uh-huh.

-Come in. -Okay.

Would you, uh, like a drink?

No. No, thanks.

This is quite a place you got here.

Thank you.

Where do you know Dr. Bickman from?

-Leo? -Mmm-hmm.

Oh, we were in the army together.

-Oh. And where are you from? -Chicago.

Oh, Chicago's a nice city.

Yeah, if you can stand the weather.

Where in Chicago?

What do you mean, "Where in Chicago?" Chicago.

There's the North Side, the South Side.

-The Near North. -The North Side.

Oh. Do you know where Division Street is?

What are you asking me all these questions for?

'Cause I think you're a Vice cop.

Vice cop? What, is there a cop around here? Look, I don't want no trouble.

-Take it easy. -Maybe I'll come back some other time.

-There are no cops here. -If I thought there was cops...

Look, I knew I shouldn't have come here.

-I told you don't worry. -Look, I'm a respected man.

-No, it's all right. -Maybe I'll come back some other time.

-I don't want any... -Look, don't worry.

Now, what do you want?

What do I want?

Well, you said 100 bucks.

Well, 100 is for a standard job.

If you want something a little bit more special,

then that'll cost a little bit more.

Oh, yeah? How much?

That all depends on what you want.

What, you got a catalogue?

I'll take the standard job this time.

Do you want me to take your clothes off?

No, no, I can just handle that myself.

Oh.

Is anything the matter?

Oh, no, nothing's the matter.

No?

I don't know how to tell you this, but you're under arrest.

Oh, shit. Are you kidding me?

No. I wish I was.

It's after 6:00. Everything okay?

Do you know where Division Street is?

Division Street, uh, is in Chicago.

Oh, yeah, what part of Chicago?

What the hell do I know. Is everything okay?

-What's the matter? -Yeah, everything's okay.

I was just asking a couple of questions.

Jackie, Farrel. Farrel, Jackie.

How do you do?

Just fine, thank you. I think your partner's a prick.

-Thank you. -So do I.

You better get dressed.

Oh, where's your trick book, honey?

I don't know what you're talking about.

She don't know what we're talking about.

I'll find the trick book.

It ain't there anyplace.

-It ain't there. -Oh.

Just what the hell do you think you're doing?

Oh, I don't know what you're talking about.

It's in that cushion on the sofa.

Right.

I knew you'd find it.

Well, let's get going, huh?

I have another appointment at 9:00.

That little trick kept the rating

of everybody in her book.

How very efficient. How'd the dentist do?

-"Stinkaroo. Tapioca time."

I don't have it down here. What time did we bust her?

-You said after 6:00. -Okay.

She's got some lollapaloozas in here, let me tell you.

Yeah, who have you got?

Gelbart. The guy from the D.A.'s office.

Yeah? How did he...

$250. That's how he did.

-Man, she was a robber. -Overcharged. Overcharged.

He should've called a cop.

You bet he should've called a cop.

It says his specialty was getting dressed in her under-clothes.

For $250 he can wear my underwear.

-Boy, I didn't write down nothing. -Oh.

What time did we start surveillance?

-Oh, about 4:00. -Okay.

You won't believe this.

Belinki and Newman made the book.

Those guys from the day shift? How'd they do?

Good.

Terrific. I wouldn't want the department to get a bad name.

Farrel, Vice Squad.

You sure?

Yeah. Okay.

Sergeant wants to see us.

Oh, good, goody, goody, goody, goody.

Would you like to sit down, Keneely?

-It's okay. -Sit down, Keneely.

Would you like a cigar?

-Farrel? -No, thanks, boss.

Would you like a light?

No, no, I don't smoke.

Then what you got that thing in your mouth for?

I don't know. I...

These cigars are for shit. I just got a whole box of them.

Sent away for them in a mail order thing.

It said they were Havanas. You know, if that's a Havana,

Castro can keep the whole stinking country.

-It's a shame. -Mmm.

Now, I gotta smoke that whole stinking box of cigars.

It's a shame.

About that hooker you busted, what's her name?

The one just brought in?

-Jackie. -Jackie. Yeah, yeah, Jackie.

Well, what about her?

Someone made a phone call.

Keneely, are you sure there was no entrapment involved?

Yeah, I'm sure. What kind of phone call?

The phone call doesn't matter.

It's just that this girl has some friend someplace.

Oh, yeah? Where?

It doesn't matter.

You talking about Rizzo?

You sure there's no chance that you never heard her specifically say

what she was gonna do for the money?

It's Rizzo.

It's the kind of mistake any cop could make.

Nobody'd be pissed. Happens all the time.

Judge would be delighted to throw the case out in the morning.

You know how overcrowded the courts are.

All you have to do is tell the judge

that you never heard her specifically state

what she was gonna do for the money.

Then there's not enough evidence for a conviction.

Hey, what's so special about this hooker?

Sure you don't want a cigar?

Well, I'm glad that's settled.

Now, about tonight. We've had a complaint about that...

Sit down.

About that fruit bar The Cavern.

They got a live show going after hours.

They lock the doors at 2:00 and then they put it on.

You guys go in around 1:30,

and we'll have five cars and a wagon there at show time.

As soon as you're ready to make the bust, you open the door.

That'll be our signal. Okay?

Okay.

You're sure you don't want a cigar?

No.

Hey, you know, this isn't a picnic for me either.

Hey, how you doing, ladies?

Shove it.

Hey, look at the Electra.

Rizzo's place is really smoking tonight.

He's got a broad in there

who does a trick with a cigarette.

Hard to believe.

I wish we could bust that place.

We couldn't even keep one of his hookers in jail.

Big, tough cops.

Hey, would you like a light?

No, no, I don't smoke.

Just a nervous habit. Very nervous.

No, thanks.

No, thanks.

Mmm-hmm.

Hello, there.

Hello, there.

My name is Stephen.

Hello, Stephen.

What's your name?

Pat. Patrick.

Are you alone?

Pat's with me.

Her loss.

Come on, Patricia, let's dance.

Hey, Scheherazade, I think we better dance.

Are you kidding me?

Come on, you wanna stand around here for another half hour?

With your badge on your forehead?

This place isn't even gonna close up.

-I'll lead. -Oh, yeah? Come on.

You wanna dance, I'll lead.

You wanna dance, I'll lead.

Hey, did you do that?

Do what?

Somebody pinched my ass.

Are you shitting me?

You smell pretty sweet. What kind of cologne you use?

I wish 2:00 would get here. I'm starting to like this.

Would you wanna do one of those dips?

Mind if I cut in?

Yeah.

Well, why don't you ask if Pat minds.

-Do you mind? -I mind.

Pat minds. Hey, now look, sweetheart, him and me are very tight.

We're gonna pick out drapes next week.

I don't think I like you.

You're holding my wrist.

-I don't think I like you. -You said that already.

We don't want any trouble.

Oh, she's so strong.

Why don't you just leave us alone, okay?

I like it when they're strong.

Why don't you put that away, okay?

Oh, are you gonna hurt me, lover?

Hey, what's your problem?

Take it easy, chickadee.

Oh, what's the matter, lover?

Aren't you gonna hurt me?

This is getting out of hand. Let's get going.

No, you aren't going anywhere!

-You get the door. -Okay, okay, okay.

Everybody cool it.

Cool it, we're police. Cops here.

-Cool it, we're cops. -Now there's just no trouble here.

-Ow!

That creepy faggot took a hunk out of my leg.

Geez. What's it all coming to, man?

What's it coming to?

Are you okay?

Yeah, yeah.

And that's what I call a nightmare.

-Ugly. Ugly. -You guys okay?

Oh, yeah, yeah, I thought we lost these.

Hey, you better have a doctor look at that.

Oh, yeah, thanks a lot.

Boy, those kooks are something.

I think I'm gonna fart.

"Dear Mom and Dad. How are you?

"I am swell. A fag ate my leg.

-"Your son, Michael."

Oh, boy.

Checking out.

Right.

Hey, they're giving the Rams six points Sunday.

Take it. Vegas is giving five.

Is that so?

Look, there's a trick book, the hooker's name is Jackie.

-Can I see it? -Sure, sure.

Only giving five in Vegas, huh?

Maybe you're right.

Think I'll bet it.

Don't bet too much.

Hey, this isn't the... Look, the pages are empty.

It's not the book I brought in.

It looks like a book to me.

Yeah, well, it is a book,

but it's not the book I brought in.

Can I have the one I brought in?

It says here, "One black loose-leaf notebook."

That's not it.

All I know is what it says here.

Look, will you cut the shit?

-Well, what do you want from me? -I want the book, damn it!

-He don't know. -He knows, everybody knows.

Come on, let's go.

What's your name?

Magenta.

-Magenta?

-Is that your name? -Yes.

It's your legal name?

No.

Do you mind telling me what your legal name is?

Connors. Harold Connors.

Harold? Harold, do you always like to dress up like that?

You know you're in a fair amount of trouble, don't you, Harold?

Do you know what they did to me last night?

No, Harold.

What did they do to you last night?

Put me in a cell with a whole bunch of animals.

From what I hear, Harold,

you and your friends can take pretty good care of yourselves.

You. What's your name? Your legal name?

Philip Lampson.

Harold? Harold?

Do you have to hold Philip's hand in my court?

Now, do you two people have attorneys?

I am representing them, Your Honor.

Oh, Mr. Crosby, it's nice to see you again.

Thank you, Your Honor.

Do your clients know their rights?

Yes, they do, Your Honor.

And they know that they have been violated.

Really, Mr. Crosby?

They have been subjected to harassment and brutality by the police.

They have been beaten, humiliated...

I'm sure they have, Mr. Crosby. Do they have bail?

Yes, they have, Your Honor. I would like to say...

I'm sure you would, Mr. Crosby.

The defendants are released on $250 bail.

There will be a preliminary hearing two weeks from today.

-Your Honor, I would like... -I said, two weeks.

Apparently, you didn't hear me, Mr. Crosby.

I have a full calendar here.

I would like to get through it before the day is over.

You may leave now.

Oh, and tell your clients not to break their high heels

on the way out of here.

The City of Los Angeles versus Jacqueline Faraday.

Are you Miss Faraday?

Yes, Your Honor.

Mr. Weldman, are you representing Miss Faraday?

I am, Your Honor.

Are you the arresting officer?

Yes, Your Honor.

Uh, Kennedy?

Keneely.

Your Honor, I realize it's a bit unusual

to hold a preliminary hearing this quickly.

However, I feel my client need not have these charges

hanging over her head any longer than is necessary.

I would like to thank the court for expediting the matter.

Certainly.

Your Honor, there is a point of ambivalence in this case.

Rather than have Detective Keneely read his entire report,

to save time, I suggest we address ourselves to that point.

Detective Keneely, do you have any objection to Mr. Weldman's suggestion?

No.

I'm sorry, I can't hear you. Could you speak up?

No, no, no, no.

Would you please step forward and take the stand?

Detective,

did you specifically hear Miss Faraday

make an indecent proposition to you?

I'm not sure.

I'm sorry, I can't hear you.

Could you speak louder please?

I'm not sure.

Did Miss Faraday specifically state

that she would perform an act of a sexual nature

for a specified amount of money?

-No. -Louder please.

No.

Thank you, Detective.

Your Honor, there's clearly insufficient grounds here.

I ask the case be dismissed.

The request is granted.

And I would like to know why with so little evidence

this case was brought before me?

I don't know.

"I pledge allegiance to the flag

of the United States of America.

"And to the Republic for which it stands.

"One nation, under God,

"with liberty and justice for all. Amen."

Get out of here, man. Take a walk, take a walk.

-Get out of here. -What the fuck this is, man?

Go on down the road, man.

Okay, he is here.

I have arrived.

Oh, cover that up.

Fifty cents deposit if you wanna look at the books.

It's refundable toward a purchase.

You talking to me?

Got 50 cents right here. Tails again.

I was interested in one of your massages.

Have you got a bad back?

Well, it wasn't my back I was thinking about getting massaged.

Will you look at that? Some dudes need

all the help they can get, huh?

Massage costs $20.

Twenty bucks? Must be pretty good for 20 bucks.

We've had no complaints.

-Got some pictures? -Oh, I certainly do.

Here. Take a look.

Hey, come on. Don't dirty it.

Well, this one here looks pretty cute.

-What's her name? -Doris.

Doris. Well, she must be pretty good for 20 bucks.

-The best. -Okay.

Point me out to ol' Doris, I will make history tonight.

Which way? Do I go in the back?

Usually the back. Which way? Which way? Come on.

-The room back there. -The room back there.

Okay, if you hear an explosion, you know it's me.

Hi.

How are you, Doris?

Hello.

Well, you're even prettier than your picture.

You can hang your clothes on the hangers.

Thank you.

What kind of massage did you say I'd get for 20 bucks?

You get a regular massage, nothing more.

Look at my nose.

Huh?

It's a terrific nose.

Wear it in good health.

It can smell the Vice cop at 100 feet.

What are you talking about?

I just came in here to buy a book.

Aw, what are you doing here?

You know you're not supposed to come around here.

I came to buy a book.

All right, pick anything you want, it's on the house.

Thanks.

Don't take your time.

Listen, honey, if I just wanted a regular massage, you know,

I would've gone to a gym. You know what I mean?

If you want something special, the price is different.

Hey, sugar, just because I'm a dude from out of town,

don't go treating me like no yokel, you hear?

How much more do you have in mind?

A hand job is an extra 10.

Straight lay is 25.

Twenty-five, huh?

Well, I got me another 25 and, uh...

Hey, Doris, honey.

Yes?

Sorry to have to tell you this, but, uh, you're under arrest.

I'll trick for you if you'll let me go.

Well, maybe in some other life.

Where you getting the stuff from?

These are old marks. I kicked it two years ago.

Sure you did.

Hey, Farrel!

Get out of here, honey.

Keneely!

The girl's a junkie and she said cutie pie here is the supplier.

Where's the stuff, Marvin?

-I haven't told him anything. -Hey, don't be dumb.

Where's the stuff, Marvin?

The broad's full of shit. I never gave her anything.

-Get out of here. -Come on, he won't hurt you.

Come on. It's okay.

If the girl's telling the truth,

you're in a lot of trouble, Marvin.

Yeah, you're gonna be in a lot of trouble.

Mr. Rizzo don't like people bothering his places.

Oh, yeah?

I got a right to make a phone call.

You don't got a right to breathe.

You lay a finger on me, I'll sue your ass.

I'm laying more than one finger on you.

There's no stuff here.

Oh, yeah? Well, we'll find it, won't we, Marvin?

Yeah, I need a warrant.

That creep back there has got a lot of dope in his house.

How do you know?

How do I know? How do I know? I know.

Do you know what time it is?

It's 1:00, Sarge. Why?

Do you think I'm gonna wake Judge Morrison for a warrant

at 1:00 in the morning

because you think some guy's got drugs in his apartment?

Hey, we need a warrant.

And if I wake Morrison and ask him for a warrant

and it turns out that you guys can't find anything,

I'd get creamed.

We need a warrant.

The girl in there has got tracks on both her arms.

And that fat tub is holding a ton of dope.

-You think? -I know.

Not for sure.

What do you want, Sarge?

Reasonable cause.

I want more than your goddamn hunch before I wake up Judge Morrison!

Look for the shit in the morning.

We can get the warrant in the morning.

In the morning that guy will be on the streets

before the court house opens,

and he'll clean up and it'll be your fault.

I'm sorry.

I am not gonna wake Judge Morrison

at 1:00 in the morning, period!

Judge Morrison, period.

I wouldn't wake up a judge for the world.

What's that?

Baby powder.

That's your actual jackpot, partner.

Okay, everybody, you just... Just cool it.

Get down, everybody! Just stay sown.

We're police officers. Get down.

Stay down.

Get down. Get down, everybody.

Stay down.

Yada, yada!

Right there!

Hold it!

I'll blow her damn head off.

-What do you got? -Come on, they're up here.

-Come on, let's get them. -No, hold it, hold it.

We got them. Let me get help.

We got them. Just sit tight. I'll make a call.

I'll make a call.

Where the hell's everybody else?

They're back at the market. What the hell happened?

A whole bunch.

The bastards responsible for it are up there.

-Where are they? -I don't know. There're three storeys.

Any way out the back?

Yeah, my partner's on the fire escape.

Okay, you two take the back, we'll go up the front.

All right, now give me a minute.

There's two of them, they're both armed.

-What happened? -There's no one up there.

What are you talking about "no one up there"?

The place is clean.

Well, we saw them go into the building.

Well, you may have seen them go in,

but I guess you just didn't see them go out.

Nobody came out of the building.

Let's check some of these other buildings.

Look, man, they're in the building.

Okay, look, you guys just stay here, right?

And pay attention, we're gonna go back out front and double check.

-That's a waste of time. -Hey, while we're farting around

an empty building, they'll have time

-to get out of the area. -You just stay right there

and fart around for another five minutes.

Now watch it.

Thinks it's a waste of time.

Hey, get out of here.

Hey, rummy, don't shoot me.

Okay, down there, it's a wrap. I checked it.

-Are you all right?

Any lights in here?

At least got one of them.

Hmm.

I think the mayor brothers should've got the other guy.

Are you guys all right?

Sure, yeah, yeah, where's the white dude?

-Where's the guy who ran out? -He got away.

He got away? What do you mean?

How could he get away?

You guys were standing right there.

He had to go right by you.

I don't know. We fired at him.

I guess we just missed him.

Just missed him? What, are you guys playing with yourselves?

Why didn't you run after him? Why aren't you pursuing him?

We heard shooting, thought you needed help,

so we went around the front.

-You guys let him get away. -Come on.

-This is crazy. -These puppets over here let him get away.

What do you mean "it's crazy"?

Why didn't you see them in the first place?

Look, I went through every room and I didn't see nobody.

You're pigs, man.

What, are you a scared of getting shot or something?

Hey, hey, calm down, will you?

-I ought to shoot you in the head. -You don't know nothing.

Cool it, they don't know nothing.

Come on, we were trying to help.

-Easy, easy, easy. -Trying to help me. We almost got killed.

-You pigs.

Get out of here, you...

Will you get the hell out of here!

Come on, Keneely, let's go, man. It's all right.

They don't know nothing.

Come on, let's go. Atta boy.

Cool down, man, cool down. They don't know nothing.

You guys had a busy night.

Look, I know how much guts it took to go after those guys.

You know who I've been on the phone with all morning?

The commissioner. The goddamn commissioner.

I got my ass reamed for half an hour.

For Christ's sake, the middle of the goddamn market.

Do you know how many people could have been killed?

Look, if I'm not mistaken, there were three guys

-shooting their guns at us! -Yeah, he's right, Sarge.

I was there. I saw it all.

What happened to that junkie girl and Marvin?

They were out on bail an hour after you brought them in.

-Who sprung them? -Weldman.

He was there with his $300 dollar suit

and enough bail money to empty every jail in California.

Anybody search the joint?

We got a warrant in the morning,

which is more than you guys did.

The place was clean.

How come Carletti and Hyatt aren't in here now?

They weren't shooting at people

in the middle of the goddamn market.

Oh, yeah, they were just letting the guys

who were doing the shooting get away.

-I didn't hear that. -I said, they were just

-letting the guys get... -I didn't hear that!

Now, we've been getting some complaints

about some perverts in the men's room at the park.

-What? -Why don't you guys,

take a few days and check it out.

Aren't you gonna offer us a cigar now?

Look, wise-ass, you are not the only cop in the world!

Yeah, you know everything and everybody's a shit except you.

Well, let me tell you something.

I am not a king, see.

I don't control everything that goes on around here, understand?

I know some things stink.

Well, what do you want me to do about it?

I got a goddamn phone on my desk and it goes upstairs.

And when it rings I answer it and say, "Yes, sir." Period!

The, uh... The captain wanted me to tell you guys that

as soon as things calm down a little,

he's putting you guys up for a citation.

Along with Carletti and Hyatt.

Why'd you guys go in that massage parlor in the first place?

You knew you shouldn't been in there.

Yeah, we didn't know when we went in,

so you can give our deepest apologies to Mr. Rizzo,

and you can give him a kiss on the butt.

Hey, sucker.

Hello, Mr. Sink.

Mr. Soap. Hello, urinals. How you doing, Kilroy?

Ah, a bunch of toilet seats.

Looks like my office.

Mr. President.

Yoo-hoo.

Sweetheart, if you're a sex maniac, I'd cool it.

The place is crawling with cops.

My goodness.

You wanna hear something funny?

When I first became a cop, right,

my mother used to, uh, wash my uniform shirts by hand.

So I used to tell her, "Hey, Lucy, you're crazy.

"I can send them to a laundry."

And she said, "No, no, no, no, no.

"It gives me pleasure."

She loved doing them.

Crazy lady.

So, my first beat,

they had me checking locks on the West Side.

All night long, checking dumb locks

on warehouses nobody wanted to break into in the first place.

You know, I checked every fucking lock three times.

Once wasn't good enough.

Every fucking lock three times.

Then they had me, uh, standing in front of

the Museum of Natural History, 16 hours a day.

Never sat down once. Uh-uh.

Nobody ever stole that museum when Keneely was standing in front of it.

I did everything they asked, man.

Never complained.

Didn't care what it was.

Did it better than anybody else. And I loved it. I really did.

You see, now I come home at night, right?

Thinking, "Hey, you did the best job of checking locks

"and standing in front of a building out of anybody in the world."

And I'd find a fresh pile of clean shirts my mother had ironed for me.

I don't know, maybe we should quit.

I think you're right.

We could be good bad guys, you know?

Pays better. Better hours. More cooperation from the police.

Well, the sarge said it.

It's Rizzo, man.

He owns the massage parlor, Marvin works for Rizzo.

That hooker, what's her name?

-Jackie. -Yeah.

Her lawyer is Weldman. Marvin's lawyer is Weldman.

Weldman works for Rizzo.

There's a white guy running around the streets

with a load of dope in his apartment.

Nobody wants to bust him.

And here we are in a shitter.

Why? Because Rizzo makes a phone call and puts the heat on.

Tell me something, how come Rizzo's out there running around

getting rich and you and me we're in the toilet, huh?

You know, fact of the matter is,

we, uh, get off here at 5:30,

and can't nobody complain if we just happen

to drift around the streets together.

Hey, how many Z's in Rizzo, one or two?

Two.

You know, he belongs in here, not me.

Yeah, well, that's the way the tickets fall, partner.

We're gonna nail that guy.

We gotta be cool, though.

The captain wants us off the streets.

Yeah, well, we'll just have to stay on the sidewalk.

Champ, how you doing?

Excuse me.

How you doing there, Mr. Rizzo?

-My name's Farrel. That's Keneely. -So what?

Don't you wanna know what we're doing here?

I've got a feeling you're gonna tell me even if I'm not interested.

You figure right. We're the Vice cops.

No, really?

Hey, you know, we're tired of working in the toilets.

Well, nobody starts at the top.

Tell me, you always get this excitable?

Well, my doctor tells me to take it easy.

I, uh, carry too much weight.

Besides, I think I pay enough.

I don't have to worry about two hungry cops out for themselves.

Don't you wish it was that easy, pal.

You can't buy us, and you know it.

-Oh, I'm all choked up! -You sound it.

Two of your boys got snuffed the other night

and you're looking at the cowboys who planted them.

Only, one of them got away, didn't he?

Yeah? My boys, huh?

-Yeah. They buy your dope for you. -I don't sell dope.

What, do you give it away?

I figure we busted up a score for you

and you know what else I'm betting?

I'm betting you gotta score again, big and fast.

Bad bet.

And we're gonna be there when you do, fat boy.

Good for you.

When was it that I made this alleged drug connection?

-Three days ago. -Three days ago,

I was in the hospital. I have a heart condition.

-You can check on that. -Okay, I will.

You guys been watching too many moving picture films.

Does that kid belong to you?

He belongs to me.

You really think you're hot stuff, don't you?

At least I'm not small-time.

What do you tell your kids you do for a living?

Oh, come on, stop it, huh?

My kids are well-fed and they're happy.

They live in a big, big house.

They get everything they want.

What do you guys have, huh?

You want me to feel ashamed? Because of what?

'Cause some broad takes off her top in a club?

I don't see my customers

hiding their eyes in their hands, huh?

Why? Because some John wants to spend

a few nice minutes with a trick in his hotel room?

What's so bad about that, huh?

What are you saving yourself for, your wedding night?

You guys sit in your public toilet,

you got it all figured out, right?

I got where I am by having punks like you for breakfast.

I'll tell you something.

There's one big difference between you and us.

That's a relief.

Yeah, and you know what it is?

You're greedy, man. You want it all.

And all we want is you.

Come and get me.

We sure made mince meat out of him.

You know, that grease-ball's acting too confident.

He's not Fred Astaire.

He's just not that smooth, you know?

We gotta flush him out.

Please, do not use the word "flush," in these premises.

He's gonna make a move soon, I know it.

Well, let's hassle him a little bit.

We gotta bust the Electra. He'd choke if we busted the Electra.

Yeah, so would the captain.

Yeah, well, that's her problem.

That's funny. I thought it was our problem.

Is that the one that does the trick with the cigarette?

That's the one.

Whew! Dynamite talent.

-Sensitive girl. -Who? Do you know her?

I can't forget her.

Oh. Hey, she got a friend?

Oh, here he is now.

How you doing?

What's the Vice doing in here?

What do you mean? We just come in here to get a little culture.

And watch the girl with the big jugs.

Give these guys a couple of drinks on the house.

No, let me say this about that.

Uh, we like to, uh, pay for our own drinks.

Thank you very much.

You're not even supposed to be here.

Oh. He says we're not supposed to be here.

Then what are we supposed to do?

We supposed to sit right here and watch the girl

with the big jugs do the trick with the cigarette.

That's a good idea.

-Thank you very much. -You're welcome.

Uh, sir? We're gonna stay.

You know you're not supposed to be here.

What do you mean by that? Just because, we're Vice Squad,

I mean, just 'cause we're, you know, Vice,

don't mean that we can't come in here

and get some good entertainment.

Say, officer, are you aware that that young lady

has her mammary glands exposed to this entire congregation?

Is that legal, sir?

-Is it? -Where's your cabaret license?

-Just knock this shit off. -Where's your cabaret license?

It's on the wall.

Why isn't it over the bar where it's supposed to be?

Ah, these freakos, man. These freakos.

It's too dark up there, I need a little light.

-Hey, partner, light, light. -Flying in light.

Can't see it. Long chair to see it.

Uh, sir, we're from the Vice Squad

and my friend wants to read what's going on up there,

to see if it's legal for that lady

to be doing what's she's doing in front of all these people.

-What do we got? -We got a cabaret license in this bar.

Wrong again.

Everything seems to be in order, my friend.

So it's okay.

You tell Mr. Rizzo that the Smith brothers say hi.

Hey, how you doing?

I haven't seen you since we busted the place downtown.

Uh, Miss. Miss, uh, there ain't nobody here.

Wonder what the asshole's doing coming home so early?

It's just 8:00.

Maybe he don't wanna miss Gomer Pyle.

Guess we ought to hang around to see if he gets any visitors.

And the referee looking the other way,

he said, "No, Willis, you hooked him with an arm."

Willis is still yelling at Jack. Pass at the other end.

The Lakers down by 15.

It is 7:00 a.m. Eastern Time on a beautiful, sunny California morning,

as we check the freeway. We got a wrong way driver on the Ventura.

Wait a minute, that's cleared up.

The Hollywood a little bit of slowing

around five minutes as you go through the pass in the highlands.

And moving right on into town very quick.

And we checked the Ventura as it moves eastbound from the San Diego,

a stalled truck over on the right hand side,

not creating any problem around Van Nuys Boulevard.

We're presently on the San Diego just about Mulhouland

and it's gonna be slow going from what we can witness here.

There are no obstructions as far as we can see.

Wake up, dear.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life.

The Hollywood a little bit of slowing,

around five minutes as you go through the pass.

A stalled truck over on the right hand side,

but not creating any problems.

There are no obstructions for as far as we can see.

We'll see if the Panther ready to go out on the west end

Hey, uh, you recognize Rizzo's girlfriend over there?

Yeah, he looks familiar. Who is he?

Imagine you're in the middle of a bunch of fruit and vegetables

and somebody's shooting at you.

That's it.

He must be getting ready to score for sure.

We gotta do it soon.

-That's very good. Very good. -Thank you.

You're quite welcome.

Hey, how you doing?

Hey, see you two guys climbed out of urinals for a couple hours, huh?

-Hey, you enjoying the fight? -Yeah, I got good seats.

Hey, we stopped by your place yesterday.

What place is that?

The Electra. A dynamite house.

-Glad you liked it. -And saw your friend.

I got a lot of friends.

Yeah, this is the guy who buys your dope.

We saw you chatting with him downstairs.

Yeah, you're gonna score soon, big, huh?

Score?

You guys use a lot of grown-up words.

Rizzo, we're gonna close you down.

We're gonna stick to you like your underwear.

You got my permission to try.

Good, 'cause we wouldn't wanna

do nothing without your permission.

I don't blame you.

You guys wanna take regular seats and enjoy the fight?

No, thanks.

-You could learn something. -Yeah, like what?

I don't know. It's an interesting game.

You know, you gotta know what you're doing,

otherwise you get your head busted playing in there.

-You nervous? -I don't get nervous.

I've been working at it too long.

We all know that.

You know what's funny?

What's really funny is that you two guys

really think you're doing something.

I mean, you go around busting $10 hookers,

beating up on faggots. For what?

For $200 bucks a week, right?

And you act like Captain Marvel or somebody.

Do you really think you can sneak around and get Rizzo?

Huh? Is that what you think?

Take a look down there.

You see those little people all paid to get in?

You see those little two monkeys in there,

beating their brains out inside the ring?

You think I got where I am by letting punks like you get to me?

-You're playing with yourselves. -It's gonna happen, Spanky.

We're gonna bust your ass.

Captain Marvel, saving the world by busting $10 hookers.

Watch out for your cape, Captain.

Make sure it doesn't get caught in places it shouldn't be.

-It's gonna happen. -Shazam.

Two, three, four...

The man's gonna have to be making a purchase real soon.

We're gonna be there when he does.

What if he spooks and gets somebody to make it for him?

-Where are we then? -Look, you're putting out that kind of bread,

I don't care who you are,

you're gonna be there to do the tasting or smelling.

We're gonna press that guy till he falls.

He's gonna wash his face, we're gonna give him the soap.

I'm with you, brother, I'm with you.

I'm also hungry. You want a burger?

-No, get me a pack of gum. -Yeah.

Hello, honey, you looking for a good time?

Hey, how you doing, Mama?

-Fifty. -Fifty, huh?

For a good time?

Well, I got $20 for that.

You sure are a cheap honky.

I know that.

-Thirty-five. -Thirty-five bucks, huh?

Well, I don't want to negotiate with you, I got $27.50.

-Can you afford a cab? -You bet.

Hey, honey, put that in a bag for me, will you?

-Coming? -Here.

Thank you, keep the change.

Oh, it's a spiffy place you got here.

Yeah, ain't it?

So, what do I get for $27.50?

You get a good time, honey.

Oh, yeah? Well, I sure could use a good time.

Why don't you, uh, lie down and make yourself comfortable?

Okay, I think I'll just lie down and make myself comfortable.

-Oh, yeah, that's great. -I know, honey.

-Oh, that's terrific. -I know, honey.

Turn over, honey.

-Hello, Keneely.

Do you know what, Keneely?

I've got a message for you.

From a friend.

He said...

Shazam.

That's all.

Shazam.

Can you dig it?

Hey, Farrel.

Hey, partner, I got spiked.

Hey, you, cop you,

I just got raped, you mother, I just...

Going to sleep on me now, huh?

Part of a steel building just fell on my head.

Hey, come on, don't go to sleep on me.

Oh, God.

I gotta get to a hospital, man.

Oh, no, it's my fault it happened, man.

We don't even know who we are, man.

Listen...

We just gotta stay alive, man, just gotta stay alive.

The captain was very worried about you guys.

He said he was more concerned for safety of his men

than with anything else.

And, uh, he said that you two were carrying your dedication

to the point where you were endangering your own safety.

Well, we can take care of ourselves.

Yeah? Look in the mirror and tell me that, huh?

The captain thinks it's best if you two were split up.

You know, you are each experienced Vice officers

and you could really be helping two newer men.

Then we'd have two good teams instead of just one.

Well, what do you want from me?

I'm in the middle and you know it.

What the hell can I do?

You had to bust Rizzo's place, right?

You had to follow him around, right?

Hell, you're good guys, you really are.

I know how you feel.

Maybe I'd do the same myself, I don't know.

But you gotta see where I am in this.

Do you know what they wanted to do with you?

You wanna know, huh? Bust you, that's what.

Well, I stopped them and it wasn't easy.

Now my ass is in a sling if you guys step out of line again.

Now, please, cool it for a while, huh?

You can pick up your new partners in the squad room.

I understand that vitamin E will clear this up

almost overnight.

-Thank you. -You're welcome.

Well, you think I ought to have maybe like

Uh, you drive wonderfully, you just really...

-Well... -Don't get no ticket.

I'll see you later.

Have a good weekend.

You have a good time.

Mmm-hmm.

-How you feeling? -Oh, just terrific.

I'm really getting tired of eating my lunch through a straw,

if you know what I mean.

You know, everybody got somebody at the other end of a phone.

The sarge's got the captain.

The captain's got Rizzo, Rizzo got somebody else.

We're so fucking alone in this thing, it ain't even a joke.

Ain't nobody gonna help us,

-you know that, don't you? -Yup, I know that.

Well, what you wanna do this weekend?

Sounds like a good idea.

"Then was Jesus led up of the Spirit into the wilderness

"to be tempted by the devil.

"And when he had fasted 40 days and 40 nights,

"he was afterward hungry.

"And when the tempter came to him he said,

"'If thou be the Son of God,

"'command that these stones be made bread.'

"But he answered and said, 'It is written,

"'Man shall not live by bread alone but by every word that

"'proceeds out of the mouth of God.'

"Then the devil taketh Him up into the Holy City

"and setteth him on a pinnacle of the temple.

"And said unto Him,

"'If thou be the Son of God, cast Thyself down.

"'For it is written,

'He shall give, His angels a charge concerning Thee.'

"'And in their hands they shall bear thee up

lest any time...'"

He'll miss the part where they killed the goat.

"Jesus said unto him, 'It is...'"

Wouldn't you think the man

would at least have had the decency to stay for the sermon?

The Lord gonna smote his ass.

With lightning.

Come on, Anthony, down here.

Come on, you sit by your mother.

-I want chocolate chip. -I want a double scoop.

One chocolate and one strawberry.

I want chocolate chip.

You can have ice cream after you finish your lunch.

I don't want lunch, I want ice cream.

Me, too.

You do like your mother told you, all right?

What are you looking at?

What are you so quiet for now?

Relax.

Waitress.

-Anything yet, man? -No, not yet.

I'm starving.

-Piece of gum? -Terrific.

-Here. -You got any ketchup?

Oh, here she comes.

Mr. Rizzo, sir. Good to see you.

Good evening, Mr. Dynamite. Very nice to see you.

-May we clean the car for you? -Check the oil for you?

Service with a smile.

Happy birthday.

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow

♪ Which nobody can deny Which nobody can deny

♪ Which nobody can deny

Happy birthday.

Aw, isn't that wonderful?

What a touching scene.

He's crying. It's his birthday.

Cut this cake.

I'm gonna give him a present.

No, let's don't embarrass him.

There we go. This one's for you, honey.

Hey, watch it, watch it. It cost a lot of money.

-Who paid of it? You? -Of course.

Okay, keep it going. Pass it down.

What the...

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow

♪ Which nobody can deny

♪ And nobody can deny

♪ And nobody can deny For he's a jolly good fellow

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow

♪ For he's a jolly good fellow

♪ Which nobody...

Hey, Rizzo, close your eyes and make a wish.

He's gotta make his buy, now. Man, he's got to.

Yeah, but somebody should tell him that.

Hey, how you doing?

Two gentlemen, Mr. Weldman.

You miserable bastards!

You think you're gonna get away with this? Well, you're wrong!

You're so goddammed wrong!

You knew he had a heart condition.

What are you talking about?

You know, it's gonna be a pleasure suing you two

for everything you have or ever will have.

I'll tell you one thing,

you better pray for his complete recovery.

That's what you better do.

Pray for his complete recovery.

He had to suspend you.

What the hell did you think he'd do?

Uh, you guys want a peanut?

No, I can't chew. I need some...

The commissioner is just thrilled.

Oh, he is delirious!

You know, Rizzo's a heavy contributor to the Saint Agnes Orphanage

and he's also a member of the Directors of the Civic Opera.

Oh, it's just beautiful.

He had to have a heart attack right now, huh?

Smart guy. Made it convenient, huh?

We were gonna nail him, man.

He was getting ready to score, I know it.

I hope he dies.

You know I did everything I could.

Say, why don't you guys come in out of the rain, huh?

What rain? That creep Weldman, right?

That guy's a poser acting like some lawyer.

He's trying sell to us that Rizzo's got

a case history of having a heart condition.

-He ain't got no heart. -Hey, didn't he go to hospital once?

-Rizzo told us he went to the hospital, right?

-Sure. -When was it?

It was after the shoot-out, right?

-Yeah. -It was during the shoot-out.

-That, that was his alibi. -Hey, what is that?

A guy goes to the hospital every time he's gonna score?

-You getting any message? -Getting a lot of messages.

-We're dumb, that's it. -I'm not hearing any of this.

We're dumb.

You know, this isn't a kid's game anymore.

You guys can get killed! You're crazy! You know it?

May I help you?

Yes, I'm looking for Mr. Rizzo's room.

Mr. Rizzo's in 5B1.

Oh, yeah, where's that?

I'm sorry you can't go in there.

He's under private care. There are no visitors allowed.

Gotcha. Let's stick around.

Dr. Berretto.

Doctor Janice Spring, please call the first floor.

Who's that?

More flowers.

Well, I'm getting tired.

Hey, what if we're not right?

I don't even wanna think about that.

-You want some coffee? -No.

Boy, you know, that guy gets an awful lot of flowers.

Even, uh, for being on the board of the opera.

Think so?

Yeah. You notice what kind of flowers they are?

-Flowers are flowers. -No, no, they're all in pots.

Deep pots. Something else funny.

People go visit him and they walk out with a pot of flowers.

He could give away an awful lot of flowers,

nobody know what's going on.

Uh, excuse me. I gotta call my mother.

It's very important. Thank you.

Hello, can you give me the, uh,

flower shop downstairs, please?

Thank you.

Uh, hello, you guys. This is Mr. Rizzo in 5B1.

Uh, yeah, hey, you guys, just sent up a couple of pots of flowers

and, uh... No, they're terrific.

I love them, but one of the pots is cracked,

the water's leaking, you know? It's very messy.

You what?

You didn't send no flowers today to Mr. Rizzo?

Thank you very much.

You? How can you come in here?

How you doing? How's he getting along?

Get out of here! Leave my husband alone.

Excuse me, Mrs. Rizzo, we just gotta check something

and we'll be gone in just a minute.

Did you ring, Mrs. Rizzo?

-These men! -Oh, I'm sorry, you'll have to leave.

No one's allowed here except the immediate family.

Well, that's not immediate family. That's a creep.

Please get them out of here.

Look, I'm sorry, but you'll have to leave.

As soon as we check something out, we'll be gone in a minute.

Boy, boy, you got a lot of nice flowers here, Spanky.

-Take it easy.

Watch out!

Take another step, you got a dead nurse.

Get out. Leave her here. Get out!

Rizzo!

Rizzo! Run for it! Go ahead.

Come on, you run for it, you fat...

Come on, run for it. Come on, get up and run!

Congratulations, Captain, I give up.

You got Rizzo, huh?

So, what the hell do you think you got?

What do you think the charge is gonna be?

Having narcotics in a hospital room?

They're not my narcotics. I didn't bring them there.

Prove I did. So what next, huh?

I get a year. Maybe.

A year. So I change my business address for a year.

Then I'm back. Meantime, you two slobs

are hanging out in your sewer making peanuts and I got a vacation.

I can use a vacation.

Go on. Pull the trigger, go on.

Complete the job.

Last name?

-Keneely. -Is that E-L-E or E-E-L?

E-E-L.

-First name? -Michael.

-Married or single? -Single.

-Previous employer? -The, uh, L.A. Police Department.

-Length of employment? -Eleven years.

Reasons for termination of employment?

-Huh? -Uh, why'd you leave?

Oh, I don't know.

I'm sorry, could you please be more specific?

Yeah, uh, more specific, uh...

Oh, I needed a change, you know? Change.

Take these, if you could, Mr. Keneely,

to the personnel department. It's down the hall.

It's the third door on your left.

Third door on the left. Gotcha.