Original subtitles

D-E-L-T-A! Delta, Delta, Delta Tri!

Will you be one 'til you die?

Delta is the one for me!

Anyone you wanna be!

So I just have a couple of thoughts

regarding this supposed HBO Max documentary on Bama Rush.

Okay, you guys, we have more tea coming through

about is someone filming Rush this year?

I have gotten a couple of reports...

They haven't went up against this college yet

and I'm telling you

you don't want to go up against the University of Alabama.

Not to be dramatic

but this HBO special could be

the end of Greek life as we know it.

- Hey, y'all. - Hey, y'all.

Hey, welcome to day one of Rush Week.

We're getting ready to rush.

Like, look at the people already starting to line up.

Love it!

Is anybody else way too old and has too many kids

to be this invested in Bama Rush TikTok?

Like, if Katie does not get the Delta Zeta bid

she is going to be devastated.

I've never smoked crystal meth

but this is how I would imagine one would feel

on a 72-hour crystal meth binge.

This is officially becoming a problem.

This is me, two days after watching Bama Rush Tok.

Bama Rush sisterhood day one, OOTD.

Jewelry is from Vivienne Westwood, Tiffany.

You know the vibes.

Blouse is from...

We did it. We did it, Joe.

I have been picking my outfits since January. January.

And my shoes are Dolce Vita.

- These earrings from... - Amazon.

I think I'm gonna be different than everyone else.

Wish us luck. Roll Tide.

I'm gonna ask for y'all to pray for me.

They are doing the Lord's work.

I'm losing it!

Roll Tide.

Hi!

Got my little finger on it

and I think it's my acceptance thing but I don't really know.

Or acceptance or decline or whatever it is.

Really scared.

I'm shaking really bad.

Pretty emotional day there when we got that, so...

Oh, my gosh!

Stops here.

Those are all my Alabama T-shirts

so the obsession is real.

Gotta love it.

I've had these since, some of them, like, freshman year.

I'm not even a hundred percent sure how she found it

but once she found it, she was in a hundred percent.

She knew it's where she wanted to be.

She's our first person in the family to do a full four-year college

so excited for her for that, too.

I can tell a million people

that I'll be going to the University of Alabama

and they'll be like, "You're totally meant to go there.

She's so bubbly and outgoing, like

she definitely needs to be in a sorority."

Alabama hair ties.

Three people, three different people

decided to give me these for Christmas

'cause they know.

Probably the part of my life that I am most proud of

is my adoption story.

So I was adopted at four days old

and I started a nonprofit organization

called Fostering Hope

where I help foster children and foster families

in the state of Illinois

and that's something that I'm super proud of

but that's just a little bit about me.

Let's be honest

I probably would not be going to the University of Alabama

if it did not blow up on TikTok.

Just because I saw it so much, I looked into the school.

Being in a sorority

will kind of help me figure out who I want to be.

Help me be surrounded by people that will always have my back

no matter what.

I've always needed a thing to be a part of

like, as part of my identity.

It's been really hard for me to find

like, a sense of, like, you know, self-worth

or, like, pride in something because I feel like

I don't really know who I am, you know?

I don't like this.

I remember doing a tequila shot with this DILF.

You had a fuckin' hard hat on.

Ally?

Yes?

I'm so sorry for whatever I did last night.

- You actually weren't that bad. - Was I not?

Okay, I actually want to be president.

So I'm gonna, like, work my way up in the governmental system.

I think I'm gonna be, like, a governmental lawyer

like, something on that track.

I'm not, like, a hundred percent sure what I do to get there yet.

Can you tell us how many jobs you're working right now?

I work at a nutrition shop, so, like, Herbalife

and then I also work at a tanning salon.

Oh, my therapist also called me a workaholic.

I was like, "Whatever, girl. At least I work."

"Hayley..." or for like, Miss USA

if I, like, won Miss Alabama

I'd be like, "Hayley Holliday, Miss Alabama."

I did pageants like at 18 months old.

Walking on the stage is the best feeling in the whole wide world.

I get a high off of winning.

We're walking to our retreat.

Oh, my gosh.

Look at our retreat.

I got into my sorority. Like, I was living the dream.

This was, like, everything I've ever wanted.

Like, I was, like, in the sorority with my, like, sisters

and I had friends.

And then I wore the wrong sorority sticker

and got dropped.

- For wearing a sticker? - Yes.

For wearing another sorority sticker.

Like, I would rather a guy tell me that I was ugly

than get dropped by a sorority.

I was so humbled.

I thought those people were my very best friends.

Like, this was my home, this was where I belonged.

And it does scare me going into, like, next year's Rush.

What's up?

Oh, probably 9:30 would be better.

What time are we waking up?

I don't know.

I've actually been going to class this week.

I'm actually in a really good mood today.

Very rare for me.

I feel like I didn't rush freshman year

because I need to find my place here.

When I first moved here, like, it was just all, like, too much.

But I do regret not rushing. I did feel really left out.

When did you know you wanted to be in criminal justice?

Well, when I was in high school

I really wanted to be a coroner.

I was very weird.

I got interested in criminal justice

'cause my dad was a police officer.

I was 13 when my dad passed away so I was in seventh grade.

Yeah.

He would be glad I'm here, but I don't know about rushing.

He just always wanted to keep me in a little bubble

and protect me.

Sororities really started

along with co-education.

In 1883, a professor at Harvard

wrote a book called Sex in Education.

The basis of his argument is that if women studied

then the blood would go to their brains and not their ovaries

and that they would shrivel up and...

and the women would die.

Imagine it's in this environment

that these women are going to college

and in the face of that

they're coming together

to form these early sororities.

The emphasis was very much on showing

that women could succeed in higher education.

They were feminists in many ways before that was a word.

And into the early 1910s

more and more women

are coming to campus.

The first generation has proven that they're successful.

In the second generation

the sororities become

more focused on parties

on socializing and on showing that

they are the best representatives

of true womanhood on campus.

The whole notion of Rush came

because they were rushing

to show themselves

as the best sororities on campus

to attract the best members.

They would meet the trains

that the new students

were taking to get to campus

literally whisking them off

and trying to woo and win over

the best members of the new class.

So this is my Rush binder

because I have OCD.

So it's just going to be organized

by each sorority

with each recruitment letter

and then I'm probably gonna have a mock-up

of my recruitment letter of how I'll send it out

to each person in here as well.

I'm definitely going to do Google slides of my outfits

and I'm gonna have them pre-planned and packed

in a separate bag

so that way, if I still need to unpack some stuff

after my parents leave or while I'm rushing

like, at night time, I can unpack that

but I want to have all my Rush stuff ready to go.

When did you know you wanted to be in a sorority at Alabama?

Yes, so I started watching Gracie O'Connor, who's on YouTube.

It made me want to go there even more.

She was like, so adorable and fun

and I was like, that looks like so much fun and I want that.

Here it is. It's my final look.

Got these super-cute tassel earrings

bracelets, and the necklace.

When Bama Rush Tok blew up

you know, I had plenty of people commenting

"Don't forget the OG

Gracie O'Connor."

And I'm like, me?

At the University of Alabama

Rush consists of four

highly competitive rounds

that give sororities and potential new members

the chance to make the best possible impression on one another.

And during these rounds

the sororities vote on their top PNMs

and the PNMs vote on their top sororities.

They're trying to find the perfect match.

Basically what happens is there's multiple girls

that gets to talk to one PNM.

That amount of girls

will get to vote on her.

If she gets high enough votes

or if we like her

then she'll come back.

Over the course of the week

the girls return to fewer and fewer sororities

whether they were dropped or chose to drop

certain sororities along the way.

Active members are looking for girls

that we can see futures in

and that are going to, like

literally uphold our chapter

and make us better in all aspects

whether that be grades or

like, how we present ourselves to the universe.

If you're not meeting a certain criteria

you'll kind of just be dropped.

After the final round, PNMs choose their top sorority

and the sororities select their new pledge class.

It comes down to, like, crunch time

and no one wants to make any decisions on anybody's girl

but someone has to.

And so we're just, like

crying through the process.

Like, it's never easy.

That part sucks.

It's way more dramatic than you're thinking it is.

Like, it's way...

And I'm not going to tell you how hard it is.

I'm so sorry. I can't.

This all leads up to Bid Day.

The PNMs meet at Bryant-Denny Stadium

and open envelopes containing the name of the sorority

that they've been invited to join

and hopefully, it's their top choice.

After the PNMs open their invitations

they run back to their forever home

with the new sisters in their pledge class.

Rush has gotten so competitive

over the past decade

that I really saw a need

for our services

and what we do to help

prepare girls to go through Rush

and hopefully get them into the house of their dreams.

I remember when we were going through recruitment at Georgia

we would all be looking at what Alabama was doing.

Yeah, they're just the trendsetters.

And I think that's why

so many out-of-state girls

decide to go to the University

of Alabama and Rush.

It's just this beast

because Greek life is everything at Alabama.

The University of Alabama is the top sorority recruitment

in all of the country

and it's a huge school with tons of money rolling into it

for their football program.

The girls are, like, glammed to the gods.

It sucks you in.

Rush at the University of Alabama

traditionally has kind of a bad rap.

It's kind of a cutthroat process.

It's just uniquely, uniquely Alabama

which doesn't really make much sense, but...

I'm still holding out that we're gonna be able

to get into those houses.

What do you think?

Probably not.

Getting inside those houses is like, absolutely not.

They're very protective of it, and rightfully so

because of the misconceptions that people want to expose

like, these sorority secrets.

Hey, who are you filming for?

Okay, ma'am, I'm going to have to ask you to, like, leave.

Tell me more about what you hope to get out of being in a sorority.

I've had a really hard time

finding someone

that can love me no matter what.

I have, like

my friends from school

who love the, like, crazy fun, sneaking into school at midnight

and jumping-in-the-pool kind of girl.

And then there's my family, who loves the sweet and caring

and, you know, really involved person.

And I feel like no one knows me fully and loves me fully.

And I feel like that's really something

I want with these girls.

You know what? Let's just go.

Weird? Why you being weird to me?

You said you wanted to get married.

When I say that...

I have a serious question for, like, everyone

and everyone has to answer this.

If you were a fruit

what kind of fruit would you be and why?

I would be a strawberry.

Why a strawberry?

I don't know. I just...

Everybody loves strawberries

and I just, like, want to be loved by everybody

because I, low-key, like, see...

like, I don't like when people don't like me.

Makalya, what about you?

A watermelon.

Why?

Because I act hard on the outside

but I'm soft on the inside.

'Cause, I mean, I moved out at 16

so as soon as my dad died, I hit the hay.

I think that's why we also bond, too

because we're missing our dads.

Trauma bond!

This hill!

Dang!

There's some fresh bodies over here.

Why are we seeing my dad's grave on Halloween?

Why?

Oh, my gosh. Your dad's grave is so pretty.

My dad loved his job so much.

Everyone talks about how he was the best police.

My dad would even give my mom tickets.

He was serious about the ticket. He liked to mess with her a lot.

My dad was such a jokester.

Like, yeah, so he was, like...

It just is exhausting having to hold everything in.

- You don't have to. - That's how I was raised.

I know. I was raised the same way.

But me and Abby are always here for you.

Yeah, but...

I'm just a very, like, to-myself person

about this kind of stuff.

My God...

Hey, y'all. Alabama recruitment day three.

Outfit of the day.

Shirt is a personal gift from Jeff Bezos.

Jeans are from an internment camp in San Francisco.

Earrings are a gift from my grandma from beyond the grave.

Bracelets are from Applebee's and shoes are from Target.

You know, something

that's ingrained in us early on

is that, yeah, you're a person

but you're a Sigma Kappa first.

You're a woman

but you're a Sigma Kappa woman first

and that's a lot of what being in a sorority is.

It's branding.

That's, you know, every single Greek organization.

That's kind of one of the things that we sign on to when we join one.

Should I put on lip gloss?

- Yeah. - Okay, ready?

- Does it look bad on camera? - No, it looks pretty.

Oh, no, I lost my pen.

With social media, with recruitment

people, like, literally look at you

like you are in college

majoring in sorority.

Almost like a little doll

in your fake University of Alabama world

in your little sorority doing your, you know, tiny little tasks.

Everyone's putting their best out on social media.

I'm not going to post a

"Oh, I... You know, I got a C on my chem test

even though I studied for 12 hours. Boo."

Should we hang it over the balcony right here?

- That's what I was thinking. - That's funny.

- Like this. - Yeah, look at her.

- Three... - I can't see the phone.

I lost something once.

That's good. That's so funny.

I lost something once.

- It's so perfect! - I lost my pen.

People assume what you're gonna be like

- as a woman in a sorority. - Yeah.

"Oh, why are you trying so hard?

Like, you should just get a husband."

I'm not only a sorority girl.

I'm a woman in a sorority.

- Yeah. - And it's not the same thing.

Honestly, what makes me mad is that in our sorority

like, we're so understanding

and it's the people that like, hate on us, and they stereotype us

I'm like, y'all are the mean ones, not us.

Like, we don't do anything. What do we do?

Sit there and eat our chicken sandwiches together?

Like, what? We don't do anything.

We put a lot... a lot of pressure on ourselves.

Example, right here of my sweet little girls.

- Are you editing us? - Yep.

- So, like, let's just say... - Let me look at that.

we want to make Lauren's arm smaller.

We can go like this.

We can make it smaller, we can make it smaller.

Let's whiten her teeth a little bit.

And then let's make Kaiya's head big for fun

just so you guys can see.

- Like, just so you can see. - You want to do me dirty?

- Like, a child could do this. - It's so easy.

If you want to make your waist thinner

to make yourself feel better about posting it online

I understand, but the problem is

is that these women with millions of followers...

Fourteen-year-old girls are gonna look at that and be like

- "Why don't I look that way?" - post that

and act like it's real.

The things that I say to myself and think to myself about my body

I would never say that to someone else.

You know, when you're living with other women

and, like, you're around other women all the time

that, you know, I think are very beautiful girls...

You know, I would kill to look like any of my friends.

You know, it's hard to be like

"That's okay that I don't look like them."

Everyone has, like, their important qualities

that aren't affected by how pretty you think your friends are

or, like, how you want your hair to look like her hair.

It doesn't change who you are and who...

like, what people really value you for.

Okay, great. So there's just a few more questions

- and we can, like, go through... - Well.

- Interim question... - Yes.

that has nothing to do with this

- but just out of curiosity... - Yes?

Nobody in my family is even, like, bald

from just being an older man.

Do you put sunscreen on your head?

- Yes! - Yes, right?

- That's what I thought. Yeah. - So much.

So much, because, like

I could never get skin cancer on my head.

- Yeah, what would you do? - This is my whole thing.

Right. That's terrible.

It's actually stressful at the beach.

I can... Right? You must have to do a hat, right?

With summer, yeah, I do hats and I do turbans.

Mm-hmm.

Okay, I think I know where I'm going with this.

Between Katie, this smart, beautiful girl

telling me that she wishes she looked like her friends

or she compares herself to other women

and the endless scrolling of these OOTDs

it hit me.

I feel like I rushed, too.

And just stay with me on this.

In these OOTDs, these girls are showing us their earrings

their necklaces, their outfits that they put on

to look like they belong in a sorority.

And I feel like I rushed because I have alopecia

and I wore a wig for 14 years.

I wore a different wig every year.

I wore a mullet, a bowl cut, a blunt cut, a body wave, a perm.

I wore a layered look.

My Rush looked different.

I was trying to get into

the sorority of all of the girls in the world who have hair

and it felt like an impossible sorority to get into.

I was going to compete for my position

and my wig was a secret.

If you found out that I wore a wig

if you even questioned that I wore a wig

it would shatter me.

So I know it's not exactly like the Alabama Rush

but it's like, not that different.

I think the competition

mostly comes from

the rankings of sororities.

Trying to get in one of those top or middle-tier houses

and not getting into a bottom house.

I visited the University of Alabama

observing the sorority Rush parties.

I probably saw five or six houses.

Rush is a social stratification ritual bar none.

Stratification in the sense

of organizing people

and groups of people

into tiers of power

of status, of prestige.

It's a proving ground

of competitive femininity

and the contemporary performance

of the Southern belle.

- Hey, y'all. - Hey, y'all.

Hey, y'all.

Do you think I would get into a top-tier house?

You wouldn't get in with those shoes.

Gotta have cute shoes.

Who determines the rankings?

I have no idea, to be honest.

Actually, I'm going to give you my potential thoughts on it.

I think a lot of the times people like to rank...

And by people, I usually mean fraternity boys

or boys in general. I feel like they're like

"Oh, this house has the hottest girls

so they're a top house."

Like, "These freshmen are the hottest freshmen

so they're going to be considered a top house."

The potential new members are trying to get in

but also, these sororities are trying to get

like, the best girls.

- For sure. - What does that even mean?

Yeah, so, the ranking system

I truly believe

it's based on the fraternities.

So essentially, they have

a social calendar

and they get to mix with certain sororities

but it's only a limited amount

and the fraternities want to be

mixing with the hottest sororities

of course, 'cause, you know

they're 20-year-old males.

So that's kind of where

the ranking system comes from.

They want to make sure the girls who are wearing their letters

are up to their standards.

The hierarchy of sororities that exist here

really determines how your experience

in the Greek system is going to be.

There are a lot of things

that you're entitled to

when you're in a top-tier sorority.

You're entitled to test banks

that are gonna help you

on your exams.

You're entitled to people

in your sorority

that have better connections

whether their parents are richer or more connected.

You're entitled to a male gaze

that might be

a little bit more beneficial to you.

And so, you know, being in a bottom-tier sorority

I have to understand that at some point

there's nothing that I can do to change institutionalized rankings.

You know, Sigma Kappa, we've done all the right things

but we'll never be anything but bottom-tier

for at least the next 20, 30 years

because that's just how it works here.

You guys, as far as we have heard

are considered like

a top-tier sorority.

I mean, I'm not gonna lie.

Like, whenever I tell someone

what sorority I'm in

and they're like, "Oh, wow."

- That's flattering, but... - I think it's hard.

We kind of have to tiptoe around this question

because we would be naive to deny

that lots of people recognize us

as a top-tier... "top-tier" house.

But do I think there are other great sororities?

- Absolutely. - Absolutely.

So this is basically the Shelby Taj Mahal.

That's what my family calls it.

But these are awards from dance competitions.

I volunteer with children with special needs and we race

and the girl that I raced with got first place.

Look, I got the Super Style award in fifth grade.

I think Rush is a week-long adrenaline rush like no other.

The Olympics, that's what we should call it from now on.

I definitely think it's a sport. Definitely.

So this is my pageant binder.

This is my life when I competed in pageants

so it's kind of why I wanted to do

the sorority Rush binder for myself.

I will have kind of similar things in here for Rush.

I'll definitely have a motivation tab of just...

a ton of quotes and stuff for me to look at.

I like the paper copy because I like to be able to feel it

and really look at it

'cause sometimes when you're in the moment

and you're stressed out and you're worried

you forget all the things that you've been taught.

I feel like I fit in perfectly with the way that they dress.

Not because I've chosen to be that way

but just because, like, that's who I am.

I don't think you want to wear anything that's too scandalous

or as we call it, scandy.

You don't want to, like, have a bad reputation for yourself.

You want to keep it the three C's...

classy, calm, and cool.

The biggest thing is that

because it started so early on

like, maybe 1800s... 1898.

Zeta Tau Alpha was established in 1898.

There's kind of like

those really old-timey

strict rules of what the group is.

You have a lot of rules you have to follow

which, some of them I really agree with.

Some of them are like

"Oh, are you kidding me right now?"

We are not allowed to drink

in our letters whatsoever.

I don't think in any of the sorority houses

you can have alcohol.

Why is that, do you know?

It must be a Panhellenic rule

because fraternities are always allowed

and the amount of alcohol

in that house is disgusting.

Another rule that I just thought

was really dumb...

No wet hair in the house on the first floor.

I know there was one house

that my roommate was in freshman year.

She told me that they literally could not leave the dorm

unless they had two out of three done

which was either you had to have your hair done

makeup done, or outfit on.

All it takes is one person to know what chapter you're in

and like, to reach out to somebody

and you can be in trouble the next day.

Like, as far as our rules

we have just the longest COC

in the entire universe...

our code of conduct.

The ones I usually get in trouble for

are like, disrespecting a sister

which is such a subjective thing

and really makes our standards process

kind of a joke sometimes.

So essentially, what happens is you go to the standards meeting.

There are six girls that like to play judge

and they like to reiterate that

you're innocent until proven guilty

but you're... you're guilty until you prove yourself innocent.

Is that my standards?

"Specify the issue or concern.

Member had a video of her wearing her Sigma Kappa letters misspelled.

The video seemed to put Sigma Kappa

and Greek life in a negative light."

And since coming here

I've changed in ways that I don't fucking like.

Roll Tide, though.

Did I lie... did I lie? I didn't lie.

I wasn't talking shit about Sigma Kappa

or like, the Greek life.

I was saying that, like, the culture at Alabama

is fucking weird.

And you know what? It is. So die mad.

Are you serious?

They're literally wearing someone else's sticker.

And I got in trouble for wearing another sticker?

Are you kidding me right now?

I just felt like they were looking

for a reason to drop me.

Other girls went upstairs in fraternity houses.

Other girls slept at fraternity houses

and they're still in the sorority.

I know who tattled on me. I'm not going to say.

And it's fine. Like, you know

I just wish nothing but happiness for her

and I hope she's having, like, the best life in DZ as she can.

I've been meeting every week with a sorority consultant.

Her name's Sloan, and she's the best.

I love her, and I feel like

I would be absolutely lost without her.

You have to remember who's recruiting you.

Nineteen-year-olds, 20-year-olds, and 21-year-olds.

- Yeah. - Do they...

Are they looking for you

to talk about a specific topic?

No. No, they're not.

So what they are looking for you

is just to stay away from five topics.

And they're called the five B's, and that...

I don't know who came up with that

but it's just a great way for you to, like, kind of remember.

So, Boys.

It just means fraternity boys and talking about like

swaps or mixers or anything like that.

But if they bring it up, it's okay to talk about it

just you don't want to, like, initiate that conversation

and be like, "What fraternities do you guys hang out with?"

The next one is Booze. Just don't talk about alcohol.

Bible.

All they mean is like, asking about their religion

what church they go to or anything like that

puts someone in a corner.

The next one is Bucks, so, money.

So you don't want to be like

"Does your dad own a yacht off of the South of France?"

or anything like that.

Or you don't want to bring that stuff up as well.

And the last one is Biden

is what they're probably referring to now

and all it means is politics.

And again, you're more than welcome to talk about diversity

and Black Lives Matter and if you're, you know

a political science major or anything like that

going to law school, Elle Woods, whatever.

But you just don't want to ask them specific questions

about their political affiliation.

So, "What are your thoughts on inflation?

What are your thoughts on Biden?

Do you think Donald Trump should have won the election?"

It just puts people in a corner and it makes them uncomfortable.

- Yeah. - That's all it is.

So my experience was pretty typical

and I definitely had my ups and downs.

I got dropped by a sorority I loved on Pref

and I was really devastated.

I was literally crying

in the Miller Learning Center

at Georgia

and I wiped the mascara from under my eyes and said

okay, I'm going to give these two sororities one more chance

and Pref completely changed my mind

on the sorority I ended up joining.

I met this incredible woman, and she was just so fun.

Like, it was the first time during sorority recruitment

where I didn't put pressure on myself

and I was just able to open up and talk to her

and she was so fun.

Luckily, they liked me enough

to make sure that I was on the Bid Day list.

What's giving me anxiety is my anxiety.

'Cause I'm like, what if I, like, break down?

Like, what if I have a panic attack?

What if I start to get really nervous or I mess something up

and, like, it causes me to, like, totally

you know, spiral?

So I'm on medication and stuff, but just

do you have any tips to make me, like, less anxious?

And I think the main thing that will cause like, anxiety

is if like, I think I messed up or if I say the wrong thing

and I get really like...

you know, just, like, nervous and have a panic attack.

Do you have any, like, tips on how to, like, not freak out?

Great question. So we'll have a ton of practice.

- Okay. Yeah. - We'll figure out your answers

and practice your conversations

so you will be hitting your points.

- Yeah. - Good.

But also, the members are there to reassure you.

You'll know if you had a good conversation.

- Uh-huh. Yeah. - Also, I'm a phone call away.

I have always been, like, an anxious person.

I would be so anxious

that I would cry myself to sleep every night.

I always kind of struggled, like, with my body

and, like, with feeling confident.

These girls would make fun of me

every single day in the locker room like, about my body

and make comments while I'm changing.

You know, comments about, like

not eating, like, I shouldn't eat or if I, you know...

wear this, then I look fat, or stuff like that.

And it sent me

into a really bad relationship with food.

So for like a full year

I was living with, like, an eating disorder.

And I hope by the time I'm in college

I will be in a lot better place, mentally.

Isabelle reminded me that the locker room

is a terrifying place for a girl.

In the summer between fifth grade and sixth grade

at day camp, this girl...

let's call her Sally Steinberg...

cornered me in the locker room

and she said, "I know you're wearing a wig."

And I said, "No, I'm not."

And then she said, "Yes, you are."

And it was devastating, and it was frightening.

I was mortified.

It felt like she was saying

"You're not one of us, and you'll never be

and I know."

So I, like...

So you know how I was talking about my eating disorder?

- Yeah. - For years... If I can ask...

- Can I ask you a question? - Sure.

Okay, so for years, did you, like

stand in the mirror for, like, hours and just, like

look at yourself and like... I do that all the...

And like, even if I pass a mirror now, I'm like...

And I, like, have cellulite on my legs now

from working out and stretch marks, and I'm like...

But, like, they're so beautiful because it shows, like

I'm overcoming something and growing.

I'm just jealous of your hip flexors.

It's like, my quads and stuff are bigger now

'cause like, they've got like, all the muscles

flowing into them.

I'll show you the before and after.

Yeah, show us.

Okay, that was a bad video, but it's fine.

How much do you think it has to do with looks?

Great question.

This is something I have thought about for years

to be completely honest, how much looks matters

during sorority recruitment.

And I think it matters to a certain extent.

Again, you have to be "pretty enough" to get in.

I would say they only really

truly matter at round one.

Just from talking to women

all over the country

I have realized there's four main steps

that really help women stand out.

First one is all about getting your name out there

because you want people talking about you

before sorority recruitment starts.

The second step I always take my clients through is mindset

because sorority recruitment

is an emotional journey.

You immediately get in your head.

What happened?

Am I not pretty enough? Am I not cool enough?

Like, why did these sororities drop me?

The third step is

the most important one, I believe

is small talk.

We figure out your answers to the questions through a formula

because there really just is a simple formula.

And the last step is optimization strategy

which is just playing the game.

Sorority recruitment's a game.

You have to know how to play it

to keep sororities interested in you.

If you're getting an average score

you're not getting invited back.

Some girls get their second choice.

Some girls have been dropped

so much in the process

and they just settled.

And some girls, they get calls

right before Bid Day, like, saying

"You've been dropped from sorority recruitment."

Which is hard.

Do I look Southern?

Definitely there

they don't like girls who look "too Northern."

I look very Northern.

Like, that's not gonna change that much.

Okay, I saved this one for last

because, oh, it is so unique

and I love to be unique

and this is definitely just a great, unique dress.

Tomorrow I'm gonna go pick up

my sorority dress for my sorority

and I'm rushing my sorority.

What sorority do you want to be in?

The sorority I want to be in is to not...

to not be discussed, because that brings bad luck

if I tell you guys.

Those boys are fine.

That one... not the one with the long things, but...

the mixed one with the curly hair.

- No, bro. - What?

When we rush, it's gonna be like real crazy.

Hey. Hey! Hey, hey! Hey!

If you thought Alabama Rush was crazy

just wait until you hear about The Machine.

Burglary, cross-burning, vandalism.

You are deep into it

if you have found out about The Machine.

Congratulations.

Have you guys heard of this thing, "The Machine"?

Do you know about that?

For... for sororities?

No, it's like, for all Greek life in Alabama

and it's on the Internet, and I was like, what is this?

I don't think I know.

Like, I don't think it's an actual thing.

We always get asked this.

People ask us this all the...

Because it is on social media.

All my friends from home think...

- They're like, ooh. - Yeah.

What's the deal with The Machine?

- No, I can't talk about that. - Yeah, no.

- Can't talk about it. - Yeah.

It'd ruin, like, a lot of stuff for us.

Even our life, honestly.

- Yeah. Yeah... yeah. - It's deep.

Mm-um.

We would never get into a sorority again.

- No. Danger. - Okay, yeah, you're probably right.

I'm John Archibald.

I've been a journalist

in Alabama for...

God... 36 years now

and I got my start

at the University of Alabama

because of The Machine.

It's a secret society.

I believe that the phrase was

"little is known, and what is known is secret."

Something very similar to that.

So The Machine is the Greek system.

They go synonymous, they're hand in hand.

It's the exact same thing.

They control everything on this campus.

So if there's an election

The Machine's rigging it.

If there's a homecoming queen

it's The Machine candidate.

You're going to look at awards and different jobs and networks

it's all going to The Machine kids that run their own thing.

Even the most trivial things like football seats

it's going to The Machine kids.

Every Greek house that's a member of The Machine

each have Machine representatives.

These representatives form a council

that meets in fraternity basements

to discuss student politics

and then they report back to their house

and their student politicians within those houses

and tell them how to vote.

You know, I wish that I could say that I had never gotten involved

with The Machine in the first place, but like, I did.

I really did try to be a good Machine senator

But at the end of the day

something just felt really dark and ugly about it.

We slowly make our way over to the Kappa Alpha house

and we go downstairs

into the basement

and I kind of peer in

and can see

this circle of people

standing around

in this kind of like dingy, smelly fraternity basement.

I'm asking myself, "What have I got myself into?"

Because I'm like, number one, why are we meeting in a basement?

Number two, why are we meeting at, you know

10.00, 11.00 at night on a Tuesday?

What are we hiding?

The individual leading the meeting

he was like, "This is just an opportunity for you

to see each other's faces.

This is, like, the group of people

you're going to be working with."

Up until that point, I didn't understand

that I was essentially

going to be a figurehead

that was going to do

what my Machine rep told me to do.

And, you know, every time I did something

that she wanted me to do

I always received positive feedback.

I always received praise.

In that moment, I felt like I was doing something good

but I really wasn't doing anything at all

except, you know, being a puppet.

I think it's ridiculous that sororities

require you to send a screenshot

of your voting receipt, right?

Others want the e-mail of your voting receipt, like

and if you don't send that in, some sororities fine you.

My sorority reacted very negatively to the article

because The Machine is the Greek system.

I think it was perceived as me going against my own sisterhood

and my own sorority.

Only a handful

of independent candidates

have successfully gone against

The Machine and beat them.

The university actually had to shut down

the Student Government Association

from 1993 until 1996

because of The Machine's

alleged activities.

The Machine systematically

made sure that a minority group

on campus of "elite people"

who got special treatment

who lived in special homes

who came from the most affluent and powerful families

got an advantage on everyone else.

It's a way better teacher

of how to do

nefarious things for power

than you could ever get in a political science class.

But I think it's a threat to people's hopes and dreams

that they may not be able

to fit into the crowd

in maybe the tax bracket

they want to fit into.

I think the danger is not belonging.

It's not being one of the chosen people.

Okay.

Little update for you guys.

I'm so excited.

We are 139 days

from me attending the University of Alabama and rushing.

It is so nice to see, like, an actual copy

in my hand of my sorority résumé.

I've had three different people proof it.

I need to tweak a few things.

I'm going to bring this light pink down.

And then I also have my headshot.

I probably look my best in this photo.

It's honestly been really therapeutic doing this résumé

and just creating this.

I've been super stressed out with school

and just life in general and my anxiety has been really bad

so honestly, what's been pushing me through each day

is reminding myself that I get to go to the school

that I've wanted to go to since my freshman year

and I also get to rush

and meet a bunch of new people.

On the days when I feel super lonely at home

that's what I think about constantly

is how I get to go to a new school and meet new people.

So if you're feeling down right now

just think of the future and think of the positive

'cause that's what I've been doing.

Just an update for y'all.

So why do you think you need a Rush consultant?

Just 'cause I didn't have anyone in my family

that's been through the Rush process

so going to her would help, like, get all my stuff in order.

So when I walk in the house

you know, like in

the open house or whatever

and you meet them

and like, I'm talking, having a conversation

and then they run out of

like, things to say

and I'm just staring back at them, like

what am I supposed to do?

I can help you be prepared for that awkwardness

and so you're not gonna have it.

Somebody else can be awkward. You're not gonna be awkward.

Just sayin'.

So does that answer your question?

That make you feel a little bit better?

- Yeah. - So we do résumé and pictures

and then we start working on your recommendations.

I used to be a professional photographer

so I can shoot a few pictures of you today if you want.

Look up at me.

I really want to do one with you

laying with your feet crossed behind you.

Hold on.

I've lived one of their worst nightmares.

I can still smell the smells of the dorm room.

I remember this girl was sitting

leaning against the wall, reading a book, like

while she was waiting to find out.

And I was like

"How can anybody be that confident

that they're getting in the sorority?"

This girl got into a sorority and I didn't

and I was just weeping for hours.

I was embarrassed. What did I do? Am I ugly?

What is it about me that I can't be getting ready

to go to a social tonight?

I went back through Rush my sophomore year

and got my first choice

but it has made me uniquely understand

the feelings that these girls are having.

I can recall that feeling just like it was yesterday.

From that experience, that's why I started this business.

Now do, like, a really big smile.

God, you are so perfect for this.

Hold on, one second.

Everyone here thinks I'm everything but black.

Like, I'm white and black. They think I'm everything.

Like, this one guy thought... like, he was...

he swore that I was just white and just really, really tan.

- Tan. - Yeah.

I was like, can you not tell, like, I'm mixed?

Everyone here just looks at you if you have any color in you.

It's just, like, really awkward, I guess.

I feel like a black sheep.

If I'm too white, I'm whitewashed

but if I act too black

then I'm not white enough.

Like, what am I supposed to be?

'Cause I'm both races. Why can't I just act myself?

I'm not acting a race. You can't act a race.

I'm just split in two, my whole life.

I'm just gonna be split. Society's dumb.

So at the University of Alabama

the Panhellenic sorority

are historically like, white

and the Divine 9 here

is historically a black sorority.

What's the difference between

black sororities and the white sororities?

I don't really know much about the black sororities

that much

because I haven't actually looked into it

because I just wanted to be in the other one.

To be in a D9 sorority

I feel like there is a tie to history that you need to have.

Even had I become more comfortable

with who I was in a racial sense

I still feel like I wouldn't fit in there

because I was raised by white people.

I think that they would have accepted me

but I wouldn't have accepted myself enough

to get the sorority experience

that I would have been happy with.

So in my sorority

I haven't had any overt racist experiences

but I have had some weird things

that people feel empowered to say to me.

I was at chapter for formal chapter.

So we have to be, you know, in business casual, essentially

and I... there were a group of girls

and there was one girl in my sorority that

she is...

she wants so badly to be progressive

and to be like "woke" or whatever.

She goes, "Oh, my God, Rian, your hair is curly."

I'm like, "Yeah, yeah, I haven't... I didn't straighten it."

She goes, "Did your relaxer wash out?"

I'm like, "Oh, my God. Oh, my God."

Like, what does that even mean? Like, what...?

It's that she, like, wants to, like, flex

that she, like, has an understanding of black culture

and she, like, knows what a relaxer is

but, like, bestie girl.

What?

The same girl, probably every time

that I, like sit down and I talk to her, she's like

"Remind me. Which one of your parents is white?"

I'm like, "It's still my mom. It is still my mom.

Every single time that you will ask me

it's still my mom."

She's not getting any darker. Like what?

So I attended the University of Alabama

from the fall of 1983 through the spring of 1987.

I started law school in '87

and graduated in '90

so I was there for two tours.

So you would think that progress

would be made more quickly.

That it wouldn't take until the year 2013

to integrate the sororities.

But when you think about the history of the sororities themselves

and the history of the state of Alabama

and just the undercurrent of racism

that has been so prominent in our history

it really doesn't surprise me that it took that long.

I didn't necessarily see it as an option or a choice

to rush Panhellenic.

I didn't see any women

that look like me

in those organizations.

It's a busy time at Alabama.

It's time for sorority Rush.

Girls brimming with excitement

at the thought of being chosen

to move to Magnolia Drive.

But there's another group moving in...

the Alpha Kappa Alphas.

We were the first African-American sorority

on Sorority Row.

We integrated Sorority Row.

three, four A-L-P-H-A K-A-P-P-A A-L-P-H-A

Alpha Kappa Alpha's on their way.

A-L-P-H-A K-A-P-P-A A-L-P-H-A

Alpha Kappa Alpha's on their way.

One night after we were at a...

at a fraternity party, we were driving by

and we noticed a smoldering cross on the front lawn.

We were terrified.

And anger crept in later

after we got beyond the shock and the dismay

of the entire situation.

Now, I grew up in Alabama

so hearing that crosses were being burned

is something that I grew up hearing about

but I had never personally seen a cross being burned.

And once you see that, you can't unsee it

and it sticks with you for a lifetime.

I have come to know and love the people in my sorority

and to know that they wouldn't have loved or trusted me

40, 50 years ago, it makes me feel upset.

And I... I honestly, for my own self-preservation

don't really like to think about it.

Little bit more?

Just a little bit more.

On Bid Day, we sat outside

and we could hear, like, all the screams

coming from the stadium

whenever they opened their bids.

- And it was just crazy. - Oh, my gosh.

My friend sent me a snap, and he was like

- "The ground just rumbled." - Literally.

I'm gonna rush in the fall.

I'm rushing in the fall, for sure.

- And then what about Abby? - I'm not planning on it.

It just... it's a lot of money

and a lot of time commitment

and just a lot of work it seems like.

So there's like, almost

250 calories in my bowl

'cause of the meat and seasoning and everything.

How do you know that?

'Cause that's why I count out the chips

so there's exactly 10 chips in my bowl.

Wait, I didn't even see you do that, though.

'Cause I... when I was shaking it, I counted it out.

I just have this image in my head that I need to be like, tiny

- I guess, 'cause... - You are tiny.

Well, I don't... I really don't see myself.

Like, when I look at myself, I see myself, like, as fat.

Like, I know you guys say I'm not

but, like, I see myself as that and I can't help it.

I feel like I would never have had an eating disorder

or anything if the boys growing up

didn't say what they said to me.

Yeah, it is... it really is the men.

I feel like women are like...

like, you grow up to, like, cater to men

and it's sad.

Have the three of you ever gotten in a fight?

- No. - I don't think so.

We... like, last night, okay

I get overstimulated sometimes really easily

and, like, I just break, like, I'm just like

"Oh, my God, Stop. Like, everything just needs to stop."

And so last night, I got a little overstimulated

and I yelled at Makalya, and then she was like, "We're good."

It was bad, but we're good.

Yeah, I wasn't listening to her when she was yelling at me, either.

Hardcore Southern Baptist.

Wait, we're all Baptist? I didn't know that.

I think when you're raised in Alabama you're kind of forced to be.

I don't know, there's a lot of people in my town

that are, like, Presbyterian and stuff.

What's your relationship with God like?

I really think He's just the anchor in my life

that I need to, like, keep

'cause life be getting real difficult sometimes.

And the fact that He risked His life...

Like, He died for us

and, like, just for our sins.

I don't know, that's just really comforting

to know that someone would do that for you.

- Can I just take a look? - Hold up.

Like, if I could do anything ever again, it would be Rush Week.

- The experience is worth it. - Yeah.

Like, 'cause everyone talks about how, like, cool it is.

I just want to do it.

Feet are, like, on the wall?

Well, that's the thing... Makalya does that all the time.

- I'm like... - You don't think it'd be weird?

I don't mean it to be stretchy.

Like

I did that too well, though.

Yeah, you did. You've gone that way before.

- I'm like... - No!

No, me and Makalya were like...

- We were like, "Hey." - "Hey."

Makalya was like, "George Bush!"

Did I tell you she did that to me?

We got roofied at a bar.

So, this guy ordered us shots.

One of the bartenders was telling us how, like

when they went back in the video footage

he, like, slipped it into all of them.

So it's nice. We love that for us.

The last thing I remember is looking at Makalya, and I was gone

and my, like, friend found me in the woods.

We took Makalya to the hospital

and she had, like, drugs in her system

and we don't do drugs, like, at all.

And I was with her the whole night.

But they did find him

and he did get beat up really bad.

Do you think he'll get, like, criminal charges?

If we... If anybody pressed any, but I'm not.

I don't know, I just don't...

Honestly, I don't want to go through the whole court case

'cause I've only been through that court case.

I don't want to go through it again. It's annoying.

- Have you been roofied before? - Mm-hmm.

Like, three times before.

Oh, I could give you the pageant walk, but...

It's so, like, fierce, though.

It's hard to be a perfectionist

because you want everything to go in order

and sometimes it doesn't.

And when there's multiple things

that just don't go right

it really stresses me out.

And my adoption

like, it triggers some of my depression and my anxiety.

When people are, like, going distant

it really makes me nervous

because I have trust issues with people

and I get nervous that people are gonna leave me.

I accidentally found out about me being adopted.

I'm really close with my grandparents

and my grandpa had handed me a paper, and he was like

"Do you think your parents still want this paper?"

And I was like, "I don't think so. Like, let me just read it, though."

I was more concerned about my homework

and I'd read it after

and it had talked about me being adopted

and I was like... I thought they were joking

and, like, I thought it was a joke.

So I was waiting for, like, the laughing

and there was no laughing.

Like, he was just focused on doing his own thing.

He didn't even know that it said that.

So it... it turned my world upside down.

Basically, I thought I knew who I was

and then it completely changed.

I've been in therapy since I was 13, and then last year

I started doing some trauma treatments

for just trauma that I didn't even realize that I could have

but it was making my anxiety and my depression so high.

I used to be able to not even take a test in class

without almost passing out.

So I'm really hoping that when I get to Alabama, like

I can just always have an open heart and an open mind

and just let myself be me

and not let my triggers, like, affect me

and take over my life there.

Just like Shelby

I was really looking forward to freshman year of college.

It's a new beginning.

My big plan was that I was going to take the wig off.

But when I got to college, I was too scared.

I couldn't do it.

I couldn't even tell my freshman-year roommate that I wore a wig.

So I slept in my wig every single night that year.

I was convinced that if you knew I was bald

you wouldn't want to be my friend.

I don't know. I always said

I was never gonna dye my hair.

And then I started, like, I got highlights

and now, I just can't stop.

Like, every time

I love to just go lighter and lighter.

Every time she asks what I want, I just say, "Okay, blonder."

- Which one of the dates? August? - Yeah.

We have Open House

and then Philanthropy.

And then there's

Sisterhood Preference Day

and then there's Bid Day.

I had a whole spiritual awakening while you were gone.

You don't even understand.

During finals, I definitely had, like, a blinding revelation.

Like, I sat myself down in front of a mirror

and was like, "How you've been acting lately

is not you, that's out of character

and you need to pull it together."

The stuff I've been doing, like, going out how I have been

you know, I shouldn't be doing that on a Wednesday.

I need to be focusing on my studies.

Like, I'm there to build my career, make money

and build an empire.

I'm not there to see who can drink the most.

Like, that's just not me. I just need to grow up.

I'm not trying to force anything anymore.

Hey, what are you doing?

Driving.

Are you okay?

Oh, I just wanted to talk to you.

I got a text last night

and someone was telling me

about how you and Kirsten were just, like, trashing me

and talking, like, really bad about me

and I just want to talk to you about that

because I don't really understand...

Who said that?

- Who said that? - Emma.

If I was in your position

I would be like, who am I to believe Makalya?

'Cause she could just be saying that

and she is actually just doing that.

Well...

Kirsten literally told Emma

that you said I was psycho and clingy.

And I just had one of Emma's friends that was with her last night

confirm that Kirsten said that you said that.

This is...

this is so annoying.

I just want to be out of the drama.

I don't know who to believe anymore

'cause I feel like everyone just lies.

All she does is hang out with Kappas

and so she just ignores me now.

It's just a sorority she wants to be in.

Well, I'm upset about it, but, like, I...

I hate emotions.

I do. I'm so emotionally unavailable.

It's so sad.

I was leaving a place

and I, like, stopped 'cause I heard my name.

Like, tell me how many people on this campus

have the name Holliday? Yeah, zero.

So I was eavesdropping. I'll be honest.

I was being nosy. I was eavesdropping.

I hear these girls and they're like

"Is that Holliday girl gonna rush, do you know?"

And then this other girl goes, "Well, I hope not

since she's blacklisted from every sorority."

And I was like, "All right, that's cool."

Like, I'm not gonna waste my time and money.

Like, if that is like... you know

people are going to blow smoke out their butt

but like, if that is true, I'm not gonna waste my money.

Like, there's no point.

I just, like, don't think, mentally

it would be best for me to rush again

like, and going through that.

Like, 'cause I didn't realize, I guess

until my therapist pointed out

like, how much of a mental, like, stress it put on me.

And I don't need that

because when they say, like, your freshman year is a very humbling

and, like, growing-up experience

they truly mean that.

There's been a few nights where I couldn't sleep at night.

Oh, seriously?

'Cause you were scared of what I was gonna...

Not really afraid of what you're...

It's just how we're gonna be perceived.

The world we live in right now is, like

- very much cancel culture. - Judgmental, yeah.

People are going to feel how they're going to feel

and I have to keep on trucking along.

Yeah.

I just don't want people to, like, hate us.

Or, like, hate me. I don't want them to hate me.

- Or us. - And, yeah.

But you're likable!

So, with Instagram and all social media

we first do a pre-screen.

So once you register

they have your name. And if they have your name

they have the ability to find you anywhere.

And these girls are like...

Should be in the FBI, creating fake accounts

and, like, making sure they find you.

So they'll figure it out.

So we just want to make sure your tagged photos

aren't anything that would be labeled

as "a standard concern."

And I'm not seeing anything.

So what they'll do is they will come sit right in front of you

and just start talking to you.

Okay, so we'll start with the first question.

What made you pick the University of Alabama?

So I'm going into advertising as my major, actually.

They have an amazing advertising program

like, one of the best in the country.

I think the biggest thing is going to be the conversations.

Isabelle, you know, is really good at small talk.

The only thing that I'm worried about

is that lead of getting to that next part

and, like, her thinking one step ahead

and that just comes from practice.

- Do you dye it? - Yeah.

Like, all that is, like, blonde now.

And... But we're only doing a little bit lighter at a time

so it don't fall out.

There is a look

that is well put together and showing confidence

and you have to blend in without crazy sticking out.

You don't have to be like everybody else

but you just need to not stick out.

Not trying to follow the crowd or the trend

but while also fitting into

a certain kind of mold just for Rush.

You don't want to give sorority a reason to cut you.

What if you just naturally stick out?

I'm thinking about myself, because I have no hair.

- Right. - But, like

how would you approach a situation like that

with somebody who just automatically stood out?

There, how I would approach someone who automatically stands out

and especially

in a place like Alabama...

we have a lot of clients who stand out for whatever reason

but I make sure that they're willing to listen

and they have to trust me.

They have to trust that I am not gonna steer them wrong.

If you own it, I think you're... you're great.

This girl is not owning it.

This is me, freshman year, in my wig.

The only time I took my wig off that year

would be in the privacy of the shower stall

in the bathroom.

I would take my wig off and let the water pour over my head

and then I'd put my wig back on and I would wash it...

and I would go into my bedroom at the dorm

like nothing had happened, like everything was normal.

Eventually, my sophomore year

the pain of not being myself

became greater than my need to fit in.

I finally took my wig off. It was just a simple action.

Just like...

But I felt like a thousand-pound helmet

and it was the hardest thing

I have ever done in my entire life.

And I did it

and I took my wig off

and I never put it back on.

And I owned it.

'Cause I'm a bald girl.

That's it.

Hi, guys.

I'm rushing at the University of Alabama this fall

and I'm gonna show you guys what is in my Rush bag.

Static Guard, scissors

tweezers, Tide-To-Go pen, a first-aid kit, mints

breath strips, sunglasses, portable charger

and then a yoga mat.

And I didn't cut it in case anybody else needs a seat.

I wanted to be able to share with them, so I didn't cut it.

And that is everything in my Rush bag, so...

This is the kind of woman that you want to marry.

This one right here, okay?

She is more prepared to take my three children...

This girl is the equivalent of a CVS receipt.

I want to be stuck with this girl

if we're all going down.

Because of this girl

I'm inspired to, now, dive deep into sorority TikTok.

Now, here is a hard copy

of your résumé with that picture.

Do you like that picture?

That's the one you sent me.

Yes.

And that's the one that you want to use for that?

Do you think we should change it?

- Mm-hmm. - Yeah.

I think we should change it.

Super important that you look friendly, engaging

and really excited to be doing this video.

Smiling

the entire time you're talking.

It's a necessary evil, so...

Hi. My name is Makalya Miller.

I'm going through recruitment as a sophomore.

Authenticity is my number-one core value.

In a sorority, like in life

connecting and finding true sisterhood

can only be done by being authentic.

Respect is also a key value.

I think sisterhood involves...

sisterhood involves respecting your sisters

in all they do.

I look forward to meeting y'all, and Roll Tide.

More? Really?

Oh, we're going to do a few more.

I don't know if this is a little too va-va-voom

but that's an option.

So, do you have a different dress for each round?

- I mean, each day of Sisterhood? - Mm-hmm.

I don't have all of them yet

but I have, like, ones

that I've been looking at all summer.

I just don't want to look like everyone else either.

Because I know I'm gonna show up

wearing the same thing as someone else.

I do not want that.

I don't know about this place.

It seems like a store my mom would like, though.

She now sort of looks like a Disney princess.

A Disney princess!

But taking it and wrapping it

so you get some tension and, like...

Tension and keeping it straight.

That's pretty comfortable, isn't it?

- Yeah. - It's not bad.

You could sleep with that and not look too crazy.

Beautiful.

I need to empty this out.

Hey, guys. I am hoping you're having a great day.

Not a good day. A great day.

It's about damn time. Rush is back, bitches!

Here we go. Bama Rush, Season 2.

Much like everyone else in America this week

I will not be doing any work at my corporate job

and instead, I will be allocating every thought

and conversation I have to Bama Rush.

Oh, this is my little chair. This actually goes here.

Everyone made fun of me for this, but it's nice

because we sit on my carpet

so, like, if my friends are sitting on my carpet

I can sit on the pink chair.

I'm really big on crystals.

It's a little piece of home

but there's like, a lot of bad energy being carried on these.

Like, when I first got all these, I felt really happy

and then just a lot of bad things happened

and I just feel like I need a recharge.

Two weeks before I came to the University of Alabama

I was sexually assaulted.

When it happened, like, I blamed myself

and blamed myself and blamed myself.

But I was, like, you know

like, that was the moment I realized

I was like, I need to become my biggest protector.

And, you know, I feel like I'm a very trusting person.

And I was like, it is good to be trusting

and it is good to look for the best in people

and it's good to love others

but, like, you need to protect yourself

because at the end of the day, like

I'm the only one that was there for myself at, like, all times.

And, you know, I know the person that I am

and the way that people saw me was not the way I was.

And they treated me how they thought I was

and they treated me like I was trash.

And...

I was really, really hurt.

And it was really hard.

I had a really hard few weeks before I came here

because I didn't feel like myself.

And I would look in the mirror every day

and I would just see the things that had been done to me.

I hate being emotional, but it's just like

I feel like it was really weird, just, like, coming here

because, like, literally, like, a weight was, like

lifted off my shoulders, because I was free from, like

all the, like, ideas about me that I had once.

And I saw who, like, I truly was

and that, like, God showed me like, who I really, truly could be.

I can, like, rewrite my story. My story can start here.

I've been placed with a lot of just really amazing female mentors.

My therapist, she is one of them.

My mom is one of them

and my church leaders are some of them.

All these women, like, have really just like

just shown me, like, the person, like, I want to be

which is exactly what Greek life is about.

Every single girl in all of these houses

has gone through some amount of struggle in their life.

These are really strong women

who want to get involved in their school

and who are passionate about building each other up.

Like, it is a sisterhood, and that's why I want to rush.

I'm "nervited"...

Which is, like, nervous and excited.

What's the thing on TikTok...

Have you ever watched the one that's like...

I wanna go to Zeta...

I wanna go to...

I wanna go to Delta Zeta...

It was something like that.

- Zeta Tau Alpha. - Yep. They're huge.

And that's Sigma Kappa.

I shoulda did this last night.

Rachel, what's the triangle mean?

The triangle is Delta and the Alpha...

Gamma Delta.

Yeah. AGD.

We're gonna need, like, a whole alphabet.

I'm gonna carry it around with me.

I found it.

Yes, Zaya. This one goes with that.

There's a grand piano. Like, right?

Yeah. So, like, the stairs are going up on either side.

It's actually really pretty.

So I just have a couple of thoughts

regarding this supposed HBO Max documentary

on Bama Rush that's...

Hulu or HBO Max, whatever it is, like, TV shows.

Okay, you guys, we have more tea coming through

about is someone filming Rush this year?

So, Bama Rush update.

I guess we'll address the elephant in the room real quick.

So I've got to bring it to you guys

but I have gotten a couple of reports

going back to potential people

or a handful of PNMs being mic'ed up.

Not to be dramatic, but this HBO special

could be the end of Greek life as we know it.

The rumor on TikTok

is that they were wearing

microphones in bracelets.

Okay.

All the rumors are flying around here at Bama

about HBO or Netflix.

Supposedly, it's HBO that has about 20 girls they're paying

and the girls will be mic'ed up going through Rush.

I don't understand.

They're just going to have audio, if this is true.

They're not gonna have any visual recordings.

I don't get it. I'm quite puzzled.

What do they think they're going to gain

by recording girls going through Rush?

They haven't went up against this college yet

and I'm telling you

you don't want to go up against the University of Alabama.

I am not... I'm here working. I'm a fraternity mom.

I wouldn't go up against the University of Alabama.

No way.

They call them The Machine for a reason.

I wouldn't go up against the University of Alabama.

No way.

They call them The Machine for a reason.

This is a rumor that started on social media

that has led to an article in The New York Times

that my film that you are watching right now

mic'ed 20 potential new members

to record what goes on inside the walls of a sorority house.

Anyone who makes a movie... I'm going to wait for sound.

See, the air conditioner, for example

is going to interfere with our sound.

So we're gonna hold.

If an air conditioner is going to interrupt

the quality of sound for this film

putting microphones on girls

in houses where they're all screaming to hear each other

is also not gonna work.

Just...

This is what we're dealing with.

And not only is there a New York Times article

about this idea

later in the day, we received a letter

from the president of the University of Alabama

and he CC'd me and basically the Feds.

But who started the rumor? That's what I'm curious about.

These accounts don't even look real.

Another rumor that goes along with all of this

is that a PNM has already been disqualified.

It's not buttoning

so I kept tucking it, because...

This girl was rushing.

They caught her with a black hair tie tied around her T-shirt.

She got kicked out of Rush

because they thought it was a microphone.

We've never met this girl, ever.

When the execs pulled me over, I immediately knew

that that could be the reason that they pulled me.

So I immediately showed them

and they said that they weren't "at liberty to check me"

or they weren't "at liberty" to look at anything.

So they said basically this was a final decision made

before I even had any chance to say anything.

And I called the dean of students

and I called the... Ambassador of Panhellenic

and they basically said there was nothing I could do

and that it was a final decision.

They saw a black thing, so I kept tucking it because...

You haven't lived until you are waiting for a text message

from an 18-year-old girl.

We lost Shelby.

It strikes me as being very Southern

because we have

a long history of silence.

What's the first rule

of The Machine?

"What is known is kept secret."

No talking to the media.

I could probably reach too deep

and say that you probably represent the carpetbaggers

coming down to teach us what's right and wrong.

I think they believe that I'm trying to ruin their tradition.

And I think there's, like, really good things

about your traditions here

and I think there's really toxic things

about your traditions here

and really confusing things about the traditions here.

But I came into this like, literally, Roll Tide.

Now that this New York Times article has named me

I'm really paranoid.

Like, everywhere I go, I'm looking over my shoulder.

Our producers are requiring that we hire a security detail

to be with the film's crew at all times

because they're actually concerned

for our physical safety at this point.

Because if you Google "Rachel Fleit"

the first image that comes up is of a bald girl

and I haven't seen another bald girl in Tuscaloosa

since I started filming here a year ago.

And if I'm gonna keep filming with my subjects

I don't know what to do.

Do I need more curls?

"This is insane. This literally can't be real.

Stop feeding into it."

What do you feel like when you see that?

I don't know why they are...

so obsessed with it.

The mic... well, if we have mics in there

that would pick up nothing.

Plus, the conversations, for the most part

really are, like, not that interesting.

What I'm looking most for is, like

not all, like, the TikTok stuff.

And at the end of the day

I want best friends, and I want to have fun

like, literally helping the community

which is what people don't see

like, people don't see all of the good that sororities do.

It's not just Instagram posts or, like, pretty girls.

Seven houses tomorrow

and then I have two houses on the next day after that

and then I have one house today.

So I got ten houses back.

Everyone has, like, told me about how extra the girls are

like, in the door song and stuff.

And when I saw that, I was like, what in the world?

Like, I was sitting there, like, laughing.

I was like...

Boom, boom! I wanna go Pi Beta Phi

Boom, boom! And honey, that ain't no lie!

Boom, boom! I wanna go Pi Beta Phi

Don't you?

I was like... I was like, dude, can I really do that?

'Cause I was like, I don't know.

I was talking at both houses and my lips would get stuck

like, to my teeth because there is no spit in my mouth

'cause I was talking so much.

'Cause they give you, like, these little water bottles

and I heard if you drink them

that it'll, like, give you bad luck

for the rest of the, like, time

so you might get dropped or something bad will happen.

So I just suffered.

I really think you're gonna get your top seven...

- Okay. - I really think.

And then Pref, it all depends

on, like, what they're thinking.

I realize that, since being a sophomore now

you don't have to be in a sorority to enjoy your life.

It's just me, personally, I don't think I can do it

but I know other girls that love it.

And when I withdrew yesterday

with my Rho Chi

she was so, like, supportive.

She just kept telling me

how she was so proud

that I had, like, an open mindset.

In Atlanta, all the dresses looked so boring.

- It wasn't your style. - Yeah.

It felt like I was being, like, forced to like them, too.

It was annoying.

Did you tell Trisha yet?

- Yeah. - What'd she say?

Well, she just texted and said

"Okay, I'm here if you need me. I'm always in your corner."

Yeah.

I don't really care about disappointing anyone.

Highlight of my day was going to AD Pi

and we're just talking about making genuine conversations

with people and genuine friends.

Throughout this, like, journey, like, I've changed so much.

I really have, like, been finding myself as a person.

This feels more at home than I've ever felt in a long time.

You can still feel pain and you can still be angry or sad

at what's been done to you

and that doesn't have to go away

but knowing that there's, like, a hope

and there's a plan

and that all of the power is within you

and God, like, really just has given me

so much, like, will to live.

Rush is about being yourself in these houses

and I think that whatever house I choose

I might not realize why I chose it in the moment

or I might not realize

the reason for everything right away

but one day, it will all click.

Ten, nine, eight, seven...

six, five, four, three...

two, one...

On Bid Day, all I could think about was home.

So I was just freaking out and crying

and going back to like

a place of self-hatred and, like, not knowing who I am.

And then...

this sounds so, like, weird and fake and stupid

but, like, I... literally all I could think about was AD Pi

and the girl, McKenna

that is now, like, she was my Bid Day Big.

Like, she was all I could think about

and I just...

she brought me this sense of hope

and the sense that I could

like, be myself

and that I finally have not just a home

but a place where I belong.

But now I'm here, and it's so freeing.

And I feel just so, like, not only at peace

but, like, hopeful for the future.

I worry about the...

the reception of all of this by my sorority sisters

because I think a lot of them

are going to understand it as like a betrayal.

It's like, no.

But I also want these organizations

to be less concerned with tradition

and more concerned with the well-being

and the individuality of their members.

I would like to join an alumna chapter

if they'll have me after this.

I would like to.

Like, the people that I met in my sorority experience

are just the best people I've met in my entire life.

It's good to be back.

How do you think you've changed since we've met?

Everything about me has changed.

Like, my outlook on life

my outlook on this school, on Greek life.

Like, everything. I've grown up for sure.

My mom used to have this photo of me

and I was like, throwing up a sorority sign.

I was like, "This is the sorority I'm gonna be in."

When I was younger, that's, like, all I wanted to do.

But I just want to be my own person.

And I feel like they all try to mold us to be, like, one person.

What do you think now

being on the other side of Rush?

Well, I think it...

Like, when you're born

you automatically are wanting to belong

'cause you're just sitting there, crying.

You're wanting, like, comfort

like, when you just got out of this womb

to this scary life.

So what else are you supposed to do?

You're always gonna need to want something.

You're just gonna sit there.

Seriously, we're making a memory.

This is a... this is a core memory.

- Core? - Yeah, core.