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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:15,641 --> 00:00:18,725 [man] Think about it. Right on the beach, 2 00:00:18,894 --> 00:00:22,393 ocean breezes, blue skies, seagulls. 3 00:00:22,564 --> 00:00:26,063 - All yours for the taking. - [woman] It's a timeshare. 4 00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:29,354 [man] Well, it's called a timeshare, 5 00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:32,613 but the truth is, for the two weeks you're at the condo, 6 00:00:32,782 --> 00:00:34,442 you're not sharing anything. 7 00:00:34,618 --> 00:00:38,236 You're not sharing the bathroom, not sharing the toaster, nothing. 8 00:00:38,413 --> 00:00:40,655 Nada. Zip. 9 00:00:40,832 --> 00:00:45,079 You are the mistress of all you survey. [chuckles] 10 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:49,123 My nephew looked up the neighbourhood on the computer. 11 00:00:50,091 --> 00:00:51,419 Your nephew? 12 00:00:54,178 --> 00:00:55,293 Mrs. Darby. 13 00:00:55,471 --> 00:00:59,089 He said the condo was in a bad neighbourhood. 14 00:00:59,267 --> 00:01:00,512 [whispers] Blacks. 15 00:01:05,231 --> 00:01:09,643 You're right. You're right. 16 00:01:09,819 --> 00:01:13,234 The condo is in a rather poor majority black neighbourhood. 17 00:01:13,405 --> 00:01:16,691 And you know what? I'm glad you brought it up. 18 00:01:16,867 --> 00:01:18,741 Seriously. 19 00:01:18,911 --> 00:01:23,739 Otherwise, I might have done something that I'd be ashamed of later. 20 00:01:23,916 --> 00:01:28,542 And that would be to sell you that timeshare. 21 00:01:28,712 --> 00:01:31,962 - You would not feel safe there. - No, I wouldn't. 22 00:01:32,132 --> 00:01:36,794 Of course you wouldn't. How could you? 23 00:01:36,970 --> 00:01:38,630 We all know, 24 00:01:38,805 --> 00:01:43,266 and I say this at the risk of sounding a little racist, 25 00:01:43,435 --> 00:01:47,682 black dudes love white women. 26 00:01:47,856 --> 00:01:51,806 Love 'em. I don't know if it's genetic or if it's society. 27 00:01:51,985 --> 00:01:55,817 We can argue nature versus nurture all day, but it's a scientific fact 28 00:01:55,989 --> 00:01:59,689 that black men can't get enough of white women. 29 00:01:59,868 --> 00:02:03,201 Don't think a woman of your age would be safe from their advances. 30 00:02:03,371 --> 00:02:04,913 No, ma'am. 31 00:02:05,081 --> 00:02:08,497 These big black bucks don't care whether you're young or old, 32 00:02:08,668 --> 00:02:09,996 skinny or fat, 33 00:02:10,169 --> 00:02:14,630 walking or with two wrinkled stumps right below the knees. 34 00:02:14,799 --> 00:02:18,666 They want your white flesh. They want it bad. 35 00:02:18,845 --> 00:02:22,925 Truth be told, I'm part black myself. 36 00:02:23,099 --> 00:02:26,384 And if it wasn't for my wife, I'd be bending you over the desk 37 00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:28,304 doing you doggy-style right now. 38 00:02:29,772 --> 00:02:34,517 I can just imagine you there, all alone in that big condo, 39 00:02:34,693 --> 00:02:38,228 awash in a sea of Negro cock. 40 00:02:38,405 --> 00:02:40,314 I'll... I'll take it. 41 00:02:40,491 --> 00:02:43,492 Smart move. Sign your Jane Hancock on the dotted line. 42 00:02:43,660 --> 00:02:46,578 - You can't go in there. - Here you go. 43 00:02:46,747 --> 00:02:49,072 - Stan Minton. - I'll be with you in a second. 44 00:02:49,249 --> 00:02:50,280 Go on. Sign it. 45 00:02:50,459 --> 00:02:52,831 Stan Minton, you're under arrest for fraud. 46 00:02:53,003 --> 00:02:55,624 Anything you say will be used against you in a court. 47 00:02:55,797 --> 00:02:58,371 It's just a little mix-up. Go on, sign it. 48 00:02:58,550 --> 00:03:00,756 - You white Jezebel! - [woman] I'll call Mal! 49 00:03:00,927 --> 00:03:04,545 [Stan] You're gonna regret this! Call my attorney! 50 00:03:07,976 --> 00:03:10,645 Madam Foreman, have you reached a verdict? 51 00:03:10,812 --> 00:03:13,848 - We have, Your Honour. - Please hand it to the bailiff. 52 00:03:16,526 --> 00:03:19,729 [judge] Will the defendant please rise? 53 00:03:19,904 --> 00:03:22,193 Madam Foreman, how do you find the defendant? 54 00:03:22,365 --> 00:03:26,315 [woman] We, the jury, find the defendant guilty. 55 00:03:27,287 --> 00:03:29,991 - What? - [judge] Thank you, Madam Foreman. 56 00:03:30,164 --> 00:03:32,738 - That bitch! - Stanley, please, quiet. 57 00:03:32,917 --> 00:03:35,918 Sentencing will be tomorrow at 10am. 58 00:03:38,214 --> 00:03:41,547 - What the fuck just happened in there? - You lost, Stanley. 59 00:03:41,717 --> 00:03:44,208 I didn't lose. You're the lawyer, you lost. 60 00:03:44,387 --> 00:03:46,047 I'm truly sorry. 61 00:03:46,222 --> 00:03:48,677 Damn it, man! I'm rich! 62 00:03:48,849 --> 00:03:50,806 I wanted some of that O.J. justice. 63 00:03:50,976 --> 00:03:52,933 Maybe the judge will give probation. 64 00:03:53,103 --> 00:03:56,638 No. In this state, first-degree fraud 65 00:03:56,815 --> 00:03:59,389 carries a minimum of three to five years. 66 00:03:59,568 --> 00:04:01,395 I got it! 67 00:04:01,570 --> 00:04:04,322 - We bribe the judge. - I'm not gonna bribe the judge. 68 00:04:04,490 --> 00:04:06,566 - Bribe him. - I'm not gonna bribe him. 69 00:04:06,742 --> 00:04:08,236 - Bribe him! - Oh, please. 70 00:04:08,410 --> 00:04:10,070 - Bribe him! - No! 71 00:04:10,245 --> 00:04:12,914 I don't practise that kind of law, and I never will. 72 00:04:13,081 --> 00:04:15,370 You wanna bribe the judge? Be my guest. 73 00:04:15,542 --> 00:04:19,955 I'm sure any shyster on the street will be happy to do it for you. 74 00:04:29,264 --> 00:04:33,048 [Stan] Mal? You're fired. 75 00:04:34,686 --> 00:04:37,722 [judge] Mr. Popper, is your client ready for sentencing? 76 00:04:37,897 --> 00:04:40,056 He is, Your Honour. 77 00:04:40,233 --> 00:04:43,851 [judge] Anything you'd like to say before the court passes sentence? 78 00:04:44,028 --> 00:04:47,860 Your Honour, my client has been convicted 79 00:04:48,032 --> 00:04:50,321 of fraud in the first degree. 80 00:04:50,493 --> 00:04:53,909 A crime of which he is innocent. 81 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,496 But even if he were guilty 82 00:04:57,667 --> 00:05:00,418 and his customers were defrauded, 83 00:05:00,586 --> 00:05:04,963 isn't it better that Mr. Minton, as a resident of Los Angeles, 84 00:05:05,132 --> 00:05:08,667 receive the money, thereby keeping it in the community, 85 00:05:08,844 --> 00:05:12,545 as opposed to some gypsies or travelling Mexicans, 86 00:05:12,723 --> 00:05:16,851 who would have taken the money out of the community? 87 00:05:18,812 --> 00:05:21,564 Please take that into consideration. 88 00:05:22,900 --> 00:05:28,439 Mr. Minton, you are hereby sentenced to serve a term of no less than three years 89 00:05:28,614 --> 00:05:31,365 at the Verlaine State Correctional Facility. 90 00:05:31,533 --> 00:05:34,653 Normally, your sentence would begin immediately. 91 00:05:34,828 --> 00:05:39,656 However, I'm going to delay your incarceration for six months 92 00:05:39,833 --> 00:05:44,162 so that you may... reorganise the charity 93 00:05:44,337 --> 00:05:48,549 that you've established to teach music to retarded children. 94 00:05:49,968 --> 00:05:53,467 Thank you, judge. 95 00:05:54,597 --> 00:05:55,878 Court is adjourned. 96 00:05:57,016 --> 00:06:01,061 - Teach music to retarded children? - It sounded good at the time. 97 00:06:01,229 --> 00:06:03,435 - I thought you were gonna bribe him. - I did. 98 00:06:03,606 --> 00:06:06,311 Hundred grand in Krugerrand doesn't go too far now. 99 00:06:06,484 --> 00:06:08,227 - Did we win? - No. I don't get it. 100 00:06:08,403 --> 00:06:10,525 You bribe the judge and I get three years? 101 00:06:10,696 --> 00:06:12,736 Mandatory. The judge couldn't fix that. 102 00:06:12,907 --> 00:06:15,480 Now you got six months to set your affairs in order. 103 00:06:15,660 --> 00:06:17,320 My affairs are already in order. 104 00:06:18,663 --> 00:06:23,953 My legal opinion is that you take a Brazilian vacation. Permanently. 105 00:06:24,126 --> 00:06:26,415 Sounds like fun. [laughs] 106 00:06:26,587 --> 00:06:28,165 I can't do that. 107 00:06:28,339 --> 00:06:30,912 Those Krugerrands were the last liquid asset I had. 108 00:06:31,091 --> 00:06:33,214 The rest of my money is frozen in the bank. 109 00:06:33,385 --> 00:06:35,959 I'm not gonna run and leave seven million behind. 110 00:06:36,138 --> 00:06:39,174 Well, Stan, my old man had a saying: 111 00:06:39,349 --> 00:06:43,050 "You walk through a locker room, you're gonna see some dick." 112 00:06:44,188 --> 00:06:48,600 - What's that supposed to mean? - It means you rip off enough people, 113 00:06:48,775 --> 00:06:50,768 eventually you're gonna go to jail. 114 00:06:50,944 --> 00:06:52,735 Thanks, that's really comforting. 115 00:06:52,904 --> 00:06:57,365 Hey, I'm a crooked lawyer. I know I'm going to jail someday. 116 00:06:57,534 --> 00:07:00,903 You don't see me crying about it. [laughs] 117 00:07:11,714 --> 00:07:14,585 Stan, slow down. You're gonna choke. 118 00:07:14,759 --> 00:07:18,128 I gotta eat now. I hear that prison food is real crap. 119 00:07:18,805 --> 00:07:22,423 I'm real glad we have six months together before you have to go to... 120 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:24,474 - You know. - Tell me about it. 121 00:07:24,644 --> 00:07:27,977 I could be in jail right now. Popper's one hell of a lawyer. 122 00:07:29,690 --> 00:07:32,312 I'm gonna be awfully lonely while you're gone. 123 00:07:32,485 --> 00:07:36,613 I know, sweetheart. But I think I get conjugal visits. 124 00:07:36,781 --> 00:07:39,782 I can probably stick it to you once a month or so. Pretty good. 125 00:07:39,950 --> 00:07:41,990 Oh, sure, that's great. 126 00:07:42,161 --> 00:07:43,869 - But I was thinking... - Mm-hm. 127 00:07:44,038 --> 00:07:49,280 ...maybe we could do something now so I wouldn't be so lonely later. 128 00:07:49,460 --> 00:07:51,251 Like what? 129 00:07:51,420 --> 00:07:55,998 Like maybe we could make a baby. 130 00:07:59,136 --> 00:08:00,678 Mindy, are you crazy? 131 00:08:00,846 --> 00:08:03,004 - I just... - I'm gonna be gone three years. 132 00:08:03,181 --> 00:08:06,432 Five at the max. What are we gonna do with the kid when I get out? 133 00:08:06,602 --> 00:08:08,594 Give it up for adoption? That's cruel. 134 00:08:08,770 --> 00:08:11,807 I thought maybe we could keep it. 135 00:08:11,982 --> 00:08:14,105 Mindy, how many times have we gone over this? 136 00:08:14,276 --> 00:08:16,648 It's selfish to bring a child into this world. 137 00:08:16,820 --> 00:08:19,655 A world full of suffering and hunger and war. 138 00:08:19,823 --> 00:08:22,574 - It's just... selfish! - I know. 139 00:08:22,742 --> 00:08:25,529 Plus, a kid would totally cramp our lifestyle. 140 00:08:25,704 --> 00:08:29,748 We couldn't go on vacation when we wanted, they break stuff, they cry. 141 00:08:29,916 --> 00:08:32,454 You'd get stretch marks. 142 00:08:32,627 --> 00:08:35,296 That's right. Stretch marks. 143 00:08:35,463 --> 00:08:36,578 Scary stuff, huh? 144 00:08:36,756 --> 00:08:39,959 [sobbing] I just let you walk all over me. 145 00:08:41,427 --> 00:08:43,420 - Oh, Mindy, come on. - [sobbing] 146 00:08:43,596 --> 00:08:45,885 OK, Mindy, you can get a dog. 147 00:08:46,057 --> 00:08:48,974 After I leave! 148 00:08:49,143 --> 00:08:51,052 Your other steak, sir. 149 00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:05,067 [thunder rumbles] 150 00:09:15,377 --> 00:09:17,619 [rock music playing] 151 00:09:22,134 --> 00:09:25,337 - What do you want, doll? - Put some Scotch in this. 152 00:09:26,555 --> 00:09:31,015 - We got whiskey. - Not as good, but it'll have to do. 153 00:09:31,184 --> 00:09:35,052 All right. That'll be 75 cents. 154 00:09:36,648 --> 00:09:37,811 Good deal. 155 00:09:39,150 --> 00:09:43,065 - Keep the change. - Ooh! [laughs] Well... 156 00:09:45,281 --> 00:09:47,073 Ah! Give me another one, honey. 157 00:10:01,255 --> 00:10:02,666 Do you got a problem? 158 00:10:04,592 --> 00:10:06,335 No. No, I... 159 00:10:06,511 --> 00:10:10,508 I was just wondering... you've been to prison, right? 160 00:10:10,681 --> 00:10:12,473 You do have a problem. 161 00:10:12,642 --> 00:10:15,845 No, I... I'm going to prison. 162 00:10:16,020 --> 00:10:19,140 But I've never been there before and I was just thinking maybe 163 00:10:19,315 --> 00:10:20,975 you could give me some pointers. 164 00:10:22,276 --> 00:10:26,274 - I'll pay you 100 bucks. - Just for talking? 165 00:10:28,490 --> 00:10:31,610 - How much time did you get? - Three to five. 166 00:10:31,785 --> 00:10:34,157 - Where at? - Verlaine. 167 00:10:34,329 --> 00:10:39,371 Verlaine? That's fucked, Stan. Guards just don't give a damn. 168 00:10:39,543 --> 00:10:43,161 They let the cons beat the shit out of one another all day. 169 00:10:43,338 --> 00:10:44,880 How am I gonna do in there? 170 00:10:45,048 --> 00:10:48,500 I mean, if you saw me, would you beat the shit out of me? 171 00:10:50,011 --> 00:10:51,470 I'd probably rape ya. 172 00:10:53,181 --> 00:10:55,589 - You'd rape me? - Yeah. 173 00:10:57,060 --> 00:11:00,808 So it's true, huh? A lot of guys turn gay in prison? 174 00:11:00,980 --> 00:11:04,681 I'm always gay. I only rape people in prison. 175 00:11:04,859 --> 00:11:08,394 - You're gay? - Yeah. This is a gay bar. 176 00:11:08,571 --> 00:11:11,276 Whoo! 177 00:11:11,449 --> 00:11:13,109 [man] Let's do this thing. 178 00:11:16,079 --> 00:11:17,110 Whoo! 179 00:11:17,288 --> 00:11:21,831 Look, rape isn't an act of sex. Rape is an act of violence. 180 00:11:22,001 --> 00:11:25,168 And in prison society, it's all about violence. 181 00:11:25,338 --> 00:11:27,663 You're judged by how bad other cons fear you. 182 00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:30,924 Raping a dude is the ultimate way of beating him down. 183 00:11:31,093 --> 00:11:33,169 It means you're one bad motherfucker. 184 00:11:33,346 --> 00:11:36,465 So you rape people? 185 00:11:36,640 --> 00:11:39,677 Well, now that's something I'm not real proud of. 186 00:11:39,852 --> 00:11:43,684 I don't condone the practise, to be honest. But I do it some. 187 00:11:43,856 --> 00:11:47,106 Just to keep up with the Joneses. You know what I mean. 188 00:11:47,276 --> 00:11:51,108 Little dude like you, be an easy mark. 189 00:11:51,280 --> 00:11:55,443 Oh, Jesus! Isn't there anything I could do? 190 00:11:55,617 --> 00:11:57,526 You could join a gang. 191 00:11:57,703 --> 00:12:00,241 - Are you a racist? - Not really. 192 00:12:00,414 --> 00:12:02,655 That leaves out the Nazis. 193 00:12:02,833 --> 00:12:05,502 - Got any Mob connections? - No. 194 00:12:05,669 --> 00:12:08,207 - Wouldn't happen to be Latino? - Uh-uh. 195 00:12:08,380 --> 00:12:11,049 Looks like everybody's gonna rape you. 196 00:12:12,342 --> 00:12:16,256 OK. OK, I... I bet I can be a racist for three to five years. 197 00:12:16,429 --> 00:12:19,216 - A real racist. Hardcore. - Well, good. 198 00:12:19,391 --> 00:12:21,716 - Then you can join the Nazis. - Excellent. 199 00:12:21,893 --> 00:12:23,850 You'll only be raped by other Nazis. 200 00:12:24,020 --> 00:12:27,685 Raped by Nazis? No way! 201 00:12:27,857 --> 00:12:29,102 Anything else I can do? 202 00:12:29,275 --> 00:12:32,276 Isn't there some way I can cultivate some outlaw image? 203 00:12:32,445 --> 00:12:35,814 - You have to kill a dude. - Without killing a dude? 204 00:12:35,990 --> 00:12:39,324 In your case, it'd be a real long shot, Stan. 205 00:12:39,494 --> 00:12:42,530 - Wouldn't happen to have any tats? - Tats? 206 00:12:42,705 --> 00:12:44,413 Ink. 207 00:12:44,582 --> 00:12:48,580 Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't grow up with my mom. So I... 208 00:12:48,753 --> 00:12:51,670 When I was 18, I got a tattoo. 209 00:12:55,092 --> 00:12:56,337 "Mommy". 210 00:12:56,510 --> 00:13:00,045 You might as well buy a welcome mat, strap it to your asshole. 211 00:13:00,222 --> 00:13:02,014 Say, "I'm open for business." 212 00:13:04,435 --> 00:13:07,270 [laughs] 213 00:13:07,438 --> 00:13:10,273 [thunder crashes] 214 00:13:10,441 --> 00:13:13,014 - [doorbell rings] - Whoo! 215 00:13:15,529 --> 00:13:18,613 - Stan? - [sobbing] I'm gonna get raped! 216 00:13:20,283 --> 00:13:22,406 [Mindy] Stanny! 217 00:13:22,577 --> 00:13:26,242 Stan, honey. You wanna wake up? 218 00:13:26,414 --> 00:13:29,415 It's 2:00. 219 00:13:30,835 --> 00:13:33,373 - Good morning, dear. - Good afternoon, Stan. 220 00:13:33,546 --> 00:13:36,464 I got you some orange juice. 221 00:13:36,633 --> 00:13:38,709 [slurping] 222 00:13:40,303 --> 00:13:42,759 It was all a bad dream. 223 00:13:42,931 --> 00:13:46,181 - Just a horrible dream. - What was your dream, baby? 224 00:13:46,351 --> 00:13:47,845 It was awful! 225 00:13:48,019 --> 00:13:52,562 I was gonna go to prison and big men were gonna rape me. 226 00:13:53,775 --> 00:13:57,274 But here I am, safe in my bed. 227 00:13:57,445 --> 00:13:59,105 It was all a bad dream. 228 00:13:59,280 --> 00:14:01,818 But you are gonna be going to prison, right? 229 00:14:01,991 --> 00:14:05,324 - Huh? - You're going to prison in six months. 230 00:14:06,954 --> 00:14:09,410 No! [sobbing] 231 00:14:11,751 --> 00:14:13,873 Oh! Oh! 232 00:14:14,044 --> 00:14:17,496 Honey, it's OK. A lot can happen in six months. 233 00:14:17,673 --> 00:14:21,884 What's gonna happen, Mindy? Is my anus gonna grow teeth? 234 00:14:22,970 --> 00:14:27,679 No, silly! You'll find a way. You always do. 235 00:14:27,850 --> 00:14:29,344 What'd you just say? 236 00:14:29,518 --> 00:14:32,009 You always find a way. 237 00:14:33,814 --> 00:14:36,352 That's right. I always do. 238 00:14:36,942 --> 00:14:39,018 My baby ready to eat breakfast? 239 00:14:40,946 --> 00:14:42,144 Mindy... 240 00:14:44,241 --> 00:14:46,992 ...did I have a lot growing up? 241 00:14:47,160 --> 00:14:51,240 No, I did not. I had nothing growing up. 242 00:14:51,414 --> 00:14:54,997 I had a drunk father who was emotionally unavailable to me. 243 00:14:55,168 --> 00:14:57,493 I had a summer job at Dairy Queen. 244 00:14:57,670 --> 00:15:00,208 I had tomato soup for dinner. 245 00:15:00,381 --> 00:15:02,374 Nobody ever gave me anything. 246 00:15:02,550 --> 00:15:06,714 Truly, mine was a hardscrabble existence. 247 00:15:06,888 --> 00:15:08,715 Yet look at me today. 248 00:15:08,890 --> 00:15:10,929 I own a palatial estate, 249 00:15:11,100 --> 00:15:12,808 I drive a Lamborghini, 250 00:15:12,977 --> 00:15:14,804 I have a summer house on the lake, 251 00:15:14,979 --> 00:15:18,229 a complete Bang & Olufsen home theatre system, 252 00:15:18,399 --> 00:15:21,068 - a beautiful wife. - [giggles] 253 00:15:21,235 --> 00:15:24,770 And whom do I have to thank for all this stuff? 254 00:15:24,947 --> 00:15:27,782 Me. Nobody else. 255 00:15:27,950 --> 00:15:31,401 Me. I am a winner. 256 00:15:31,579 --> 00:15:35,493 I set my mind to do something, and I do it. 257 00:15:37,334 --> 00:15:42,329 And so when I say to you that I will make myself un-rapeable, 258 00:15:42,506 --> 00:15:46,041 I will be un-rapeable! 259 00:15:46,802 --> 00:15:48,213 Yay! 260 00:15:48,387 --> 00:15:50,047 [♪ Joe Esposito: You're the Best ♪] 261 00:15:50,222 --> 00:15:53,258 ♪ You're the best around Nothing's gonna ever keep you down ♪ 262 00:15:53,433 --> 00:15:58,391 ♪ You're the best around Nothing's gonna ever keep you down ♪ 263 00:15:58,563 --> 00:16:00,473 - ♪ You're the best around ♪ - Ow! 264 00:16:01,483 --> 00:16:05,646 ♪ Nothing's gonna ever keep you down ♪ 265 00:16:13,578 --> 00:16:17,445 I got a couple of things in mind. But first I got kind of a weird question. 266 00:16:17,624 --> 00:16:20,660 Do you have anything you could tattoo around my sphincter 267 00:16:20,835 --> 00:16:22,329 to make it less attractive? 268 00:16:24,505 --> 00:16:26,961 Fourteen, 15... 269 00:16:27,133 --> 00:16:31,213 - Stanny, come to bed. - Not... Not now, Mindy. 270 00:16:31,387 --> 00:16:33,296 Nineteen, 25. 271 00:16:33,473 --> 00:16:36,888 [grunts] There. You see new definition? 272 00:16:37,059 --> 00:16:39,218 My forearm. I think I see a new vein. 273 00:16:39,395 --> 00:16:41,103 I see a very sexy man. 274 00:16:42,523 --> 00:16:44,065 - You do? - [giggles] 275 00:16:44,233 --> 00:16:46,522 Well, I wonder what he's gonna do next. 276 00:16:52,950 --> 00:16:55,156 Take me, darling. 277 00:16:55,953 --> 00:16:59,653 Mindy, I'm gonna go to prison in a few months. 278 00:16:59,832 --> 00:17:01,326 Not now, honey. 279 00:17:04,002 --> 00:17:07,087 And while I'm there, men are gonna try to take advantage of me. 280 00:17:07,256 --> 00:17:10,043 - I don't wanna hear about this. - This is important. 281 00:17:10,217 --> 00:17:12,256 - [sighs] - I'm doing everything I can 282 00:17:12,427 --> 00:17:14,586 to make sure that doesn't happen. 283 00:17:14,763 --> 00:17:17,468 But if it does happen, and I do get violated... 284 00:17:17,641 --> 00:17:18,803 Stan! 285 00:17:20,393 --> 00:17:23,015 ...I want the first time... 286 00:17:23,188 --> 00:17:24,730 ...to be by someone I love. 287 00:17:31,404 --> 00:17:32,946 Oh! 288 00:17:34,741 --> 00:17:35,820 Oh. 289 00:17:37,535 --> 00:17:40,821 Stan, I couldn't. 290 00:17:40,997 --> 00:17:44,164 Please, Min, for me. 291 00:17:47,462 --> 00:17:51,044 Well... OK. 292 00:17:53,634 --> 00:17:55,093 Great. 293 00:18:08,149 --> 00:18:11,268 [Stan screaming] Oh, the horror! 294 00:18:11,527 --> 00:18:13,484 - [shouting] - Two! 295 00:18:13,654 --> 00:18:15,646 Three! Four! 296 00:18:15,823 --> 00:18:18,396 Five! Six! 297 00:18:18,575 --> 00:18:21,660 Seven! Eight! 298 00:18:21,829 --> 00:18:24,533 You must concentrate, Stanley. Concentrate! 299 00:18:24,706 --> 00:18:28,075 - How can I concentrate when I'm bored? - If you're bored, leave. 300 00:18:28,252 --> 00:18:29,662 Oh, come on, Cho. 301 00:18:30,796 --> 00:18:33,915 - Master Cho! - Master Cho. 302 00:18:34,091 --> 00:18:37,257 I've been coming here for a week and I'm still doing baby stuff. 303 00:18:37,427 --> 00:18:39,503 When am I gonna learn to kick some ass? 304 00:18:39,679 --> 00:18:43,179 I'm a yellow belt. Nobody's afraid of a yellow belt. 305 00:18:43,350 --> 00:18:45,556 You think you're ready to move up in rank? 306 00:18:46,561 --> 00:18:47,592 Yeah, that's right. 307 00:18:47,771 --> 00:18:50,309 [laughs] Fine. You'll have your chance. 308 00:18:50,482 --> 00:18:54,266 - Hey, Seymour! Come on. - All right. 309 00:18:54,444 --> 00:18:57,279 Seymour. 310 00:18:57,447 --> 00:19:00,068 You'll fight Seymour for honour of green belt. 311 00:19:02,910 --> 00:19:06,114 - Want me to fight this little guy? - [growling] 312 00:19:06,289 --> 00:19:08,744 - All right. - Fighting stance! 313 00:19:08,916 --> 00:19:11,242 All right, Seymour. See what you got. 314 00:19:11,419 --> 00:19:12,996 - [grunts] - [grunts] 315 00:19:13,629 --> 00:19:15,005 Ah! Ah! 316 00:19:15,172 --> 00:19:16,667 Oof! 317 00:19:19,885 --> 00:19:22,376 - [chuckling] - [grunting] 318 00:19:23,889 --> 00:19:26,760 - How do you like that, huh, Seymour? - Stanley! 319 00:19:32,439 --> 00:19:34,017 [grunts] 320 00:19:35,234 --> 00:19:37,772 - Uh! - You can forget about your refund! 321 00:19:37,945 --> 00:19:39,653 [both grunt] 322 00:19:42,533 --> 00:19:43,943 Is that all you got? 323 00:19:46,620 --> 00:19:48,114 Ah! 324 00:19:54,544 --> 00:19:56,122 Pussy. 325 00:20:07,057 --> 00:20:08,385 [groaning] 326 00:20:17,442 --> 00:20:19,767 That's some technique you got. 327 00:20:28,077 --> 00:20:29,702 [cat yowls] 328 00:20:29,871 --> 00:20:35,078 You couldn't knock a shit out of a paper bag full of shit. 329 00:20:36,419 --> 00:20:38,910 Oh, and you could do better? 330 00:20:54,311 --> 00:20:56,185 Any questions? 331 00:21:00,651 --> 00:21:02,774 - [Stan] Mindy! - Dinner's almost ready! 332 00:21:02,945 --> 00:21:05,021 - I got great news! - What happened to you? 333 00:21:05,197 --> 00:21:07,818 Never mind that. I just met the best guy. Guess what? 334 00:21:07,991 --> 00:21:11,277 - He's agreed to be my trainer. - Really? What's his name? 335 00:21:12,329 --> 00:21:13,443 The Master. 336 00:21:16,708 --> 00:21:19,662 - How do you do... - The Master. 337 00:21:20,587 --> 00:21:22,378 He's gonna live with us and train me. 338 00:21:22,547 --> 00:21:25,003 I have to pay him when my accounts get unfrozen. 339 00:21:25,175 --> 00:21:26,835 - Oh. - [The Master] Ahem. 340 00:21:27,010 --> 00:21:28,670 And the contract. 341 00:21:28,845 --> 00:21:31,170 Yeah, I'll write it up right now. 342 00:21:36,686 --> 00:21:41,063 I'm so sorry, The Master, but there's no smoking in the house. 343 00:21:44,152 --> 00:21:45,694 Yes, there is. 344 00:21:49,115 --> 00:21:51,688 I better heat up another Lean Cuisine. 345 00:21:51,867 --> 00:21:55,735 Honey, you've done it again. You heated it just perfect. 346 00:21:56,789 --> 00:21:58,912 [Mindy] So... 347 00:21:59,083 --> 00:22:02,167 ...The Master, where are you from? 348 00:22:02,336 --> 00:22:04,163 Hell. 349 00:22:05,631 --> 00:22:10,044 Oh! What brought you to LA? A job? 350 00:22:11,095 --> 00:22:15,424 I travel where the wind takes me. 351 00:22:16,850 --> 00:22:19,721 - Isn't he great? - [laughs] 352 00:22:19,895 --> 00:22:23,062 Well, how long have you been teaching the art of self-defence? 353 00:22:25,776 --> 00:22:29,773 Young lady, what I teach is not art. 354 00:22:29,946 --> 00:22:31,904 It is science. 355 00:22:32,073 --> 00:22:37,115 A careful amalgam of the most deadly parts of karate, kung fu, 356 00:22:37,287 --> 00:22:41,783 Wing Chun, Krav Maga, Muay Thai, 357 00:22:41,958 --> 00:22:45,908 savate and Filipino Kali. 358 00:22:46,087 --> 00:22:47,332 My favourite. 359 00:22:47,505 --> 00:22:50,079 Ooh! [laughs] Wow! 360 00:22:50,842 --> 00:22:53,594 I find weakness 361 00:22:53,761 --> 00:22:56,431 and turn it into strength. 362 00:22:56,597 --> 00:22:59,598 I find fat and turn it into muscle. 363 00:22:59,767 --> 00:23:04,476 I find blisters and turn them into canker sores. 364 00:23:04,647 --> 00:23:09,225 I find doubt and I turn it into will. 365 00:23:09,402 --> 00:23:11,643 You can stop doing that now. 366 00:23:11,821 --> 00:23:14,193 - Doing what? - Your hand. 367 00:23:16,033 --> 00:23:19,698 Oh. I forgot it was there. 368 00:23:23,290 --> 00:23:25,199 I'm gonna take a shit. 369 00:23:28,003 --> 00:23:30,577 - Enjoy yourself. - Mm. 370 00:23:32,174 --> 00:23:36,172 Stan, honey, does he really have to live here? 371 00:23:36,345 --> 00:23:38,633 - The Master? - He scares me. 372 00:23:38,805 --> 00:23:42,673 I know. He scares me too. That's exactly why he's the perfect guy to teach me. 373 00:23:42,851 --> 00:23:45,556 - But, Stan... - Look, want me to survive in prison? 374 00:23:45,729 --> 00:23:48,896 - Of course I do. - Then don't argue with me about this. 375 00:23:49,065 --> 00:23:50,608 You'll see, he'll grow on you. 376 00:24:01,411 --> 00:24:03,818 Wake up, weakling. 377 00:24:03,997 --> 00:24:07,330 - [both scream] - What the hell you doing in here? 378 00:24:07,500 --> 00:24:10,834 It's time to begin your training. 379 00:24:11,004 --> 00:24:13,292 - But it's five in the morning. - [The Master growls] 380 00:24:13,464 --> 00:24:16,382 - Is that liver? - It's your breakfast. 381 00:24:16,551 --> 00:24:21,793 And every moment you delay, I squeeze out more of its vital juices. 382 00:24:21,973 --> 00:24:24,298 Trust me, you'll need them later. 383 00:24:24,475 --> 00:24:27,844 - OK, I'm up. - [The Master] But are you ready? 384 00:24:28,020 --> 00:24:30,690 Look what I found beside your bed. 385 00:24:30,856 --> 00:24:34,106 This is weakness. 386 00:24:34,276 --> 00:24:37,645 This is defeatism. 387 00:24:37,822 --> 00:24:40,443 Actually, we were kind of enjoying that. 388 00:24:40,616 --> 00:24:42,609 Eat this. 389 00:24:43,744 --> 00:24:45,902 And follow me. 390 00:24:52,419 --> 00:24:53,796 [The Master] Punch! All right, now kick. 391 00:24:53,796 --> 00:24:56,037 [The Master] Punch! All right, now kick. 392 00:24:56,215 --> 00:24:58,503 - Kick! - [blender whirring] 393 00:24:59,551 --> 00:25:00,926 Kick like you mean it! 394 00:25:01,553 --> 00:25:03,047 [glass shatters] 395 00:25:03,221 --> 00:25:06,756 - Oh! - I blended that gross stuff you wanted. 396 00:25:06,933 --> 00:25:10,598 I got it all in Koreatown. I didn't even know there was a Koreatown. 397 00:25:10,770 --> 00:25:12,597 [sniffing] 398 00:25:14,274 --> 00:25:16,231 Too many eggs. 399 00:25:16,401 --> 00:25:19,852 The fish oil is nice. Ox pancreas is good. 400 00:25:21,239 --> 00:25:24,074 - Next time, use more tongue. - That's what she said. 401 00:25:24,242 --> 00:25:25,985 - Ooh! - Oh, Stan! 402 00:25:26,161 --> 00:25:28,034 - I'm all right. - Get away from him! 403 00:25:28,204 --> 00:25:32,581 - I'm OK. - Rise and drink your lunch. 404 00:25:37,088 --> 00:25:38,915 [slurping] 405 00:25:41,092 --> 00:25:43,380 Don't I get to eat anything that tastes good? 406 00:25:46,681 --> 00:25:50,630 - You like hot dogs? - Yeah, sure. 407 00:25:50,810 --> 00:25:53,135 If you don't drink that, 408 00:25:53,312 --> 00:25:55,684 the boys in prison will feed you... 409 00:25:57,024 --> 00:25:59,313 ...many hot dogs. 410 00:26:08,786 --> 00:26:11,952 I can kick your ass so fast you wouldn't even feel it. 411 00:26:12,122 --> 00:26:15,621 - I'd like to see that. - [whooshing] 412 00:26:15,792 --> 00:26:18,996 You didn't kick me in the ass. I didn't feel anything. 413 00:26:19,171 --> 00:26:20,962 [sighs] 414 00:26:24,009 --> 00:26:26,001 [sniffs] 415 00:26:27,554 --> 00:26:29,677 [Stan] Ow! Ow! 416 00:26:29,848 --> 00:26:32,303 Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! 417 00:26:32,475 --> 00:26:34,349 Ow! Ow! Ow! 418 00:26:34,519 --> 00:26:35,978 Oh! Ow! Ooh! 419 00:26:36,146 --> 00:26:38,637 - [The Master] Pain is interpretation. - OK. 420 00:26:38,815 --> 00:26:43,393 I'm gonna call a time-out here. You're beating my husband with a flaming stick. 421 00:26:43,570 --> 00:26:46,654 Isn't there some kind of role-playing exercise you can do? 422 00:26:46,823 --> 00:26:49,314 Run along, honey. This is man stuff here. 423 00:26:49,492 --> 00:26:51,235 Go ahead, Master. 424 00:26:51,411 --> 00:26:53,652 Ow! Ow! Ow! 425 00:26:53,830 --> 00:26:57,364 Ow! Ah! Oh! 426 00:26:57,542 --> 00:26:59,665 Ow! Ah! 427 00:26:59,836 --> 00:27:02,505 [grunting] 428 00:27:04,632 --> 00:27:08,464 No disrespect, I realise this is strengthening my nipples. 429 00:27:08,636 --> 00:27:11,471 And believe me, I can feel the burn. 430 00:27:11,639 --> 00:27:15,683 I was wondering, just how important are strong nipples? 431 00:27:15,851 --> 00:27:18,473 - Someday these nipples... - Ah! 432 00:27:18,646 --> 00:27:21,516 ...may save your life. - Ah! 433 00:27:22,858 --> 00:27:26,357 You are what you eat. 434 00:27:26,528 --> 00:27:29,814 [Mindy] Um, are you sure that's Eastern mysticism? 435 00:27:29,990 --> 00:27:32,991 Because I learned that in health class in third grade. 436 00:27:33,160 --> 00:27:34,784 Silence, woman. 437 00:27:34,953 --> 00:27:38,903 I mean, all that stuff about pain and illusion sounds totally mystical. 438 00:27:39,082 --> 00:27:42,368 But "you are what you eat"? Even I know that. And I am from Omaha. 439 00:27:45,172 --> 00:27:47,413 What part of Omaha? 440 00:27:47,591 --> 00:27:50,212 - Oh! - Dundee. 441 00:27:51,303 --> 00:27:52,880 Happy Hollow. 442 00:27:53,972 --> 00:27:55,383 You're Oscar? 443 00:27:55,557 --> 00:27:58,130 I should have known. 444 00:27:58,309 --> 00:28:02,141 Those womanly, childbearing hips 445 00:28:02,313 --> 00:28:07,355 could not be a product of this perfidious coast. 446 00:28:07,527 --> 00:28:10,812 Uh, do you mind? I'm trying to eat scorpion here. 447 00:28:10,988 --> 00:28:13,111 Insolent fool! 448 00:28:13,616 --> 00:28:16,487 - [Mindy screams] - You have lost the right 449 00:28:16,661 --> 00:28:19,199 to eat scorpion. 450 00:28:22,500 --> 00:28:26,284 - [sighs] - Great. There goes my lunch. 451 00:28:26,462 --> 00:28:28,086 - Thanks. - This is not working. 452 00:28:28,255 --> 00:28:29,999 - Master says... - Master's a jerk. 453 00:28:30,174 --> 00:28:31,668 - Shh! - He is! 454 00:28:31,842 --> 00:28:36,421 And he is a creep. The house smells. Does he have to smoke in every room? 455 00:28:36,597 --> 00:28:40,429 The only time I see you alone is in bed and you're too tired to... 456 00:28:40,601 --> 00:28:43,970 Hey! I got five months, and then it's prison. I gotta stay focused. 457 00:28:44,146 --> 00:28:48,607 I gotta think, eat, breathe prison. I don't have time for anything else. 458 00:28:48,775 --> 00:28:51,776 Not even time for me? 459 00:28:51,945 --> 00:28:54,152 [sighs] 460 00:28:54,323 --> 00:28:55,651 Tell you what. 461 00:28:55,824 --> 00:28:59,193 After I'm done working out with The Master, I'll rent some movies, 462 00:28:59,369 --> 00:29:02,738 and we'll cuddle around the TV like old times, OK? 463 00:29:02,914 --> 00:29:04,706 Really? 464 00:29:12,924 --> 00:29:14,039 - Mindy! - [gasps] 465 00:29:14,217 --> 00:29:17,052 Some men broke into the house! They wanna rape you! 466 00:29:17,220 --> 00:29:19,426 - What? - Big men! 467 00:29:19,597 --> 00:29:22,717 - They wanna rape you! Repeatedly! - What about The Master? 468 00:29:22,892 --> 00:29:26,391 They have guns! They killed him! There's nothing we can do! 469 00:29:26,562 --> 00:29:29,480 - You're gonna get raped! Raped! - Oh, my God! 470 00:29:29,649 --> 00:29:32,318 - Raped! - [sobbing] 471 00:29:32,485 --> 00:29:34,442 Rape! 472 00:29:36,656 --> 00:29:38,114 There. 473 00:29:40,618 --> 00:29:43,738 - Now you know how I feel. - What? 474 00:29:43,913 --> 00:29:47,495 Fear of rape. That's what I'm gonna have to live with for three years. 475 00:29:47,666 --> 00:29:51,249 [whimpering] Nobody broke into the house? 476 00:29:51,420 --> 00:29:52,618 That's right. 477 00:29:52,796 --> 00:29:55,833 Now maybe you'll be supportive of what I'm going through. 478 00:29:56,008 --> 00:29:59,626 [gasping] You son of a bitch! 479 00:30:01,221 --> 00:30:03,510 - OK, you're upset. - You son of a bitch! 480 00:30:03,682 --> 00:30:06,469 - You don't have to call names. Mindy! - Son of a bitch! 481 00:30:06,643 --> 00:30:11,222 - Bitch, bitch, bitch! You bastard! - Mindy. Mindy! 482 00:30:11,398 --> 00:30:14,683 - [screaming] - Oh! Mindy. 483 00:30:14,860 --> 00:30:17,529 - What are you doing? - What's it look like? Leaving. 484 00:30:17,696 --> 00:30:20,946 Why? Because I pull one little prank, which when you calm down... 485 00:30:21,116 --> 00:30:23,867 It's not just one prank! You only think about yourself! 486 00:30:24,035 --> 00:30:26,953 You're the most selfish man who ever lived, ever! Ever! 487 00:30:27,122 --> 00:30:30,538 Whoa! Excuse me? Selfish? I find that funny! I really do! 488 00:30:30,709 --> 00:30:33,081 I've given you everything you've ever wanted! 489 00:30:33,253 --> 00:30:34,830 - You're crazy! - This house! 490 00:30:35,004 --> 00:30:36,962 - It's in your name. - Those boobs! 491 00:30:37,132 --> 00:30:40,216 - You wanted these. - You said the Lamborghini's too small, 492 00:30:40,385 --> 00:30:44,299 - I got a second car. - A 1955 Porsche Speedster! 493 00:30:44,472 --> 00:30:47,473 - It has a back seat! - Oh! 494 00:30:48,476 --> 00:30:52,521 - What do you want? I'll do anything. - I want a baby, you asshole! 495 00:30:52,688 --> 00:30:55,606 That again? Fine. OK. You win. 496 00:30:55,775 --> 00:30:58,266 - We'll have a baby. - Really? 497 00:30:58,444 --> 00:31:01,279 No, not really, but we can visit people who have kids. 498 00:31:01,447 --> 00:31:04,234 - [groans] - [starts engine] 499 00:31:04,408 --> 00:31:06,235 [Mindy] Goodbye! 500 00:31:07,953 --> 00:31:10,444 Good, leave! I don't need you! 501 00:31:10,623 --> 00:31:12,414 I don't need anybody! 502 00:31:12,583 --> 00:31:15,121 - [woman moaning on TV] God! - [knock on door] 503 00:31:15,294 --> 00:31:19,374 Uh, one moment. I'm... meditating. 504 00:31:23,927 --> 00:31:26,299 - [sighs] - [woman on TV] It's so big! Oh, God! 505 00:31:26,471 --> 00:31:28,096 Mindy left. 506 00:31:28,515 --> 00:31:30,887 - [woman on TV] Yes, yes, yes! - Good. 507 00:31:31,059 --> 00:31:34,060 Oh, God! [screaming] 508 00:31:34,229 --> 00:31:37,847 Now, the real training can begin. 509 00:31:40,277 --> 00:31:44,321 We do not have time to teach you the five fingers of death. 510 00:31:44,489 --> 00:31:47,609 We have only time for one finger. 511 00:31:48,159 --> 00:31:49,654 Pick one. 512 00:31:50,662 --> 00:31:53,698 All right. Wait. This one. 513 00:31:57,794 --> 00:31:59,252 Hold this. 514 00:32:08,888 --> 00:32:10,086 Your turn. 515 00:32:20,149 --> 00:32:21,976 - [grunts] - [cracking] 516 00:32:24,028 --> 00:32:27,646 Ah! Ow! 517 00:32:27,823 --> 00:32:31,655 Ah! Ah! 518 00:32:31,827 --> 00:32:34,365 - [cracking] - [screaming] 519 00:32:34,538 --> 00:32:39,034 [♪ The Briggs: Harder to Stand] 520 00:32:47,342 --> 00:32:49,169 Ah! 521 00:32:49,344 --> 00:32:51,633 [screaming] 522 00:32:59,938 --> 00:33:03,722 ♪ You don't know what to do, you're sitting there and you're all alone 523 00:33:03,900 --> 00:33:06,308 Don't look at what you're doing. 524 00:33:06,486 --> 00:33:09,522 Just feel. Feel. 525 00:33:09,697 --> 00:33:13,232 ♪ You've got no place to call your home 526 00:33:13,409 --> 00:33:16,743 I felt. It felt bad. 527 00:33:19,082 --> 00:33:20,706 Oh! 528 00:33:23,002 --> 00:33:27,664 You must learn to feel your opponent. Know his intentions. 529 00:33:30,301 --> 00:33:34,714 If he is good at a distance, then you must be close. 530 00:33:38,559 --> 00:33:44,063 If he is good close, then you must fight him at a distance. 531 00:33:50,237 --> 00:33:54,235 What if your opponent is good close and from a distance? 532 00:33:54,408 --> 00:33:56,447 Then you are up to your eyeballs in shit. 533 00:33:56,618 --> 00:33:59,156 Watch your mouth. You are nobody. 534 00:34:01,623 --> 00:34:02,655 Ow! 535 00:34:03,959 --> 00:34:06,628 - Hey, what are those? - A little something I picked up 536 00:34:06,795 --> 00:34:09,749 - at the Shaolin temple. - What do you use them for? 537 00:34:09,923 --> 00:34:11,334 Oh! 538 00:34:12,092 --> 00:34:13,551 Oh! Ow! 539 00:34:13,718 --> 00:34:15,510 Oh! Ah! 540 00:34:16,304 --> 00:34:18,261 Your lunch. 541 00:34:50,588 --> 00:34:52,830 [coughing] 542 00:35:11,025 --> 00:35:13,516 Yeah. 543 00:35:13,694 --> 00:35:16,019 [Stan chuckles] 544 00:35:17,990 --> 00:35:20,278 - Whoo-hoo! - All right, that's close enough. 545 00:35:24,079 --> 00:35:25,110 Whoo-hoo! 546 00:35:26,331 --> 00:35:28,324 [cackles] Hoo-hoo! 547 00:35:30,001 --> 00:35:32,623 Ah! [grunts] 548 00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:37,046 Never celebrate too early. 549 00:35:37,217 --> 00:35:38,794 I'll remember that. 550 00:35:47,143 --> 00:35:48,341 Yes. 551 00:35:52,023 --> 00:35:54,431 Mississippi five, Mississippi six, 552 00:35:54,609 --> 00:35:56,934 Mississippi seven, Mississippi eight, 553 00:35:57,111 --> 00:36:00,196 Mississippi nine... 554 00:36:00,364 --> 00:36:02,606 My God! That is amazing! 555 00:36:02,784 --> 00:36:04,776 Oh, that's nothing. You should see him. 556 00:36:04,952 --> 00:36:09,365 It's easy for me. Cigarettes have ruined my circulation so much 557 00:36:09,540 --> 00:36:12,209 I can't even feel my hands anymore. 558 00:36:12,376 --> 00:36:14,285 So that's your trick. 559 00:36:14,462 --> 00:36:16,004 Mm-hm. 560 00:36:16,589 --> 00:36:21,215 Here's to Stan Minton, my second finest student. 561 00:36:21,385 --> 00:36:23,710 Second finest? 562 00:36:23,888 --> 00:36:25,595 Who's number one? 563 00:36:25,764 --> 00:36:28,765 I hope you never have to find that out. 564 00:36:28,934 --> 00:36:32,552 He used what I taught him, not for his own protection, 565 00:36:32,730 --> 00:36:34,971 but for evil. 566 00:36:39,820 --> 00:36:43,687 Well, fuck that guy. Here's to number two. 567 00:36:43,865 --> 00:36:49,239 Now, drink up. Stan has one final test. 568 00:36:50,580 --> 00:36:51,956 Tonight. 569 00:36:54,834 --> 00:36:57,835 I do? OK. 570 00:36:58,004 --> 00:36:59,629 Let's go for it. 571 00:37:16,981 --> 00:37:18,689 Hello, Cho. 572 00:37:18,858 --> 00:37:21,610 It's Master Cho to you. 573 00:37:21,778 --> 00:37:25,989 Master Cho? Or Masturbator Cho? 574 00:37:26,157 --> 00:37:30,285 - Excuse me? - You heard me... punk. 575 00:37:34,498 --> 00:37:37,333 Looking for a beat-down, mister? 576 00:37:37,501 --> 00:37:40,870 What are you looking for? To beat off? 577 00:37:41,046 --> 00:37:42,790 That's it. 578 00:37:44,842 --> 00:37:46,633 [grunting] 579 00:37:54,852 --> 00:37:55,931 Ooh! 580 00:38:00,899 --> 00:38:02,144 [Stan chuckles] 581 00:38:03,568 --> 00:38:06,024 [grunting] 582 00:38:11,826 --> 00:38:14,400 [clapping] 583 00:38:16,581 --> 00:38:18,325 [The Master] Very good, Stan. 584 00:38:18,500 --> 00:38:20,623 You mind walking me to my car? 585 00:38:20,794 --> 00:38:23,285 - All right. - [laughing] 586 00:38:23,463 --> 00:38:27,876 I don't feel too comfortable here. I don't think the Asian people like me. 587 00:38:28,051 --> 00:38:30,672 [♪ C-Bo: What You Want Nigga] 588 00:38:33,306 --> 00:38:35,133 [music stops] 589 00:38:41,397 --> 00:38:46,225 All right, you just go up those steps, turn yourself in for processing. 590 00:38:46,402 --> 00:38:48,774 By the way, slight change of plans. 591 00:38:48,946 --> 00:38:51,817 The Bureau of Prisons called me yesterday. 592 00:38:51,991 --> 00:38:55,075 They're sending you to Oaksburg, not Verlaine. 593 00:38:55,244 --> 00:38:59,111 - Why? - Who knows? Bureaucracy. 594 00:38:59,290 --> 00:39:02,409 It makes no difference. 595 00:39:03,961 --> 00:39:06,748 Go on. You'll do great. 596 00:39:06,922 --> 00:39:09,793 - Yeah? - Yeah. 597 00:39:13,387 --> 00:39:16,803 Uh, did Mindy or her lawyer call about the divorce? 598 00:39:19,559 --> 00:39:22,845 It's not like I care anyway. All right. 599 00:39:23,021 --> 00:39:24,930 See you guys in three years. 600 00:39:30,654 --> 00:39:35,031 - What do you think? - I think you should walk away quickly. 601 00:39:39,037 --> 00:39:41,658 [coughing] 602 00:39:43,541 --> 00:39:46,542 - Ah! Filthy pig! - I need a beer. 603 00:39:46,711 --> 00:39:48,039 Oh! 604 00:39:48,212 --> 00:39:50,917 Don't get in the car! 605 00:39:51,090 --> 00:39:53,842 [continues muttering] 606 00:39:54,010 --> 00:39:57,758 [sobbing, sniffling] 607 00:40:12,111 --> 00:40:14,103 This your first time? 608 00:40:16,532 --> 00:40:19,948 Hey, sweetie, ain't you got a name? 609 00:40:20,119 --> 00:40:22,242 Ah! 610 00:40:22,413 --> 00:40:25,746 Talk to me again, I'll twist your whole damn titty off. 611 00:40:25,916 --> 00:40:29,166 - Ooh, my mama, ooh, my mama. - Hey, man, I'm scared too. 612 00:40:29,336 --> 00:40:31,827 But it can't be as bad as they say it is. 613 00:40:32,005 --> 00:40:36,169 It's just as bad as they say. The sooner you realise that, the better. 614 00:40:36,343 --> 00:40:40,672 - Tell 'em. - You'll find out, soon enough. 615 00:40:42,516 --> 00:40:44,888 What'd I say about talking to me? 616 00:40:46,353 --> 00:40:47,681 Damn, man! 617 00:41:10,710 --> 00:41:13,415 [man] Welcome to Oaksburg Penitentiary. 618 00:41:13,588 --> 00:41:16,672 For reasons beyond what I care to imagine, 619 00:41:16,841 --> 00:41:20,589 you gentlemen have found yourselves under my stewardship. 620 00:41:20,761 --> 00:41:24,973 My name is Warden Francis Gasque. 621 00:41:25,141 --> 00:41:27,548 But you can just call me Boss. 622 00:41:27,727 --> 00:41:31,475 We only got one rule here at Oaksburg: 623 00:41:31,647 --> 00:41:37,234 Don't fuck with the Boss. That means you leave me and my men alone. 624 00:41:37,403 --> 00:41:42,111 What you animals do to each other, that's your business. 625 00:41:42,282 --> 00:41:46,031 And right behind you is the warden's garden. 626 00:41:46,203 --> 00:41:51,363 Anybody caught pissing on that will have his penis removed. 627 00:41:53,001 --> 00:41:56,702 Sergeant Bullard will lead you to the medical office where you'll strip 628 00:41:56,880 --> 00:42:00,960 and have your cavities searched. You're gonna enjoy that. 629 00:42:01,134 --> 00:42:05,428 Now, gentlemen! Single file. Come on! Get up there. 630 00:42:05,597 --> 00:42:06,628 Pecker to butt hole. 631 00:42:11,144 --> 00:42:14,430 All right, assume the position. 632 00:42:20,153 --> 00:42:23,901 - [screams] - Why you screaming like a little girl?! 633 00:42:24,073 --> 00:42:27,110 Sarge, look. 634 00:42:27,285 --> 00:42:29,076 Sweet Jesus! 635 00:42:31,664 --> 00:42:36,041 It's like an alien staring into my soul. 636 00:42:36,294 --> 00:42:37,954 [door buzzes] 637 00:42:38,129 --> 00:42:42,541 Welcome home. New luxury condos, compliments of the state. 638 00:42:42,717 --> 00:42:44,425 Step it up, boys. 639 00:42:45,761 --> 00:42:50,257 - [blues plays] - [men shouting] 640 00:42:50,432 --> 00:42:53,433 - Come on, sweet meat! - [yelling] 641 00:43:01,693 --> 00:43:06,320 Hello there, young fella. I guess we're cellmates. 642 00:43:07,783 --> 00:43:11,827 My name's Larry. But you can call me Shorts. 643 00:43:11,995 --> 00:43:14,533 Shorts, you're in my bunk. 644 00:43:14,706 --> 00:43:18,620 - What? - That's my bunk. Get out. 645 00:43:18,794 --> 00:43:22,127 [laughing] You hold on there just a second. 646 00:43:22,297 --> 00:43:25,666 This is my bunk. What gives you the right to... 647 00:43:25,842 --> 00:43:27,420 Ow! 648 00:43:29,054 --> 00:43:34,392 - I said that's my bunk. - Yeah, I guess it is. 649 00:43:34,559 --> 00:43:35,757 Whoo! 650 00:43:42,150 --> 00:43:45,519 Uh, you might wanna change the sheets. 651 00:43:47,447 --> 00:43:50,364 I'm kind of a compulsive masturbator. 652 00:43:55,329 --> 00:43:56,871 Shorts, that's your bunk. 653 00:43:57,039 --> 00:44:00,242 - Really? - Absolutely. 654 00:44:00,418 --> 00:44:04,332 Thanks, buddy. I think we're gonna get along just fine. 655 00:44:04,505 --> 00:44:05,785 Hey, put her here. 656 00:44:08,134 --> 00:44:11,716 - I don't shake hands. - Well, whatever. 657 00:44:11,887 --> 00:44:15,636 [grunts, sighs] 658 00:44:15,808 --> 00:44:18,215 Ah, good to be back. 659 00:44:20,354 --> 00:44:23,105 Tell me, Shorts, who's the toughest guy here? 660 00:44:23,273 --> 00:44:25,515 Who's the biggest bad-ass in the cell block? 661 00:44:25,692 --> 00:44:28,942 Biggest bad-ass... There's a lot of contenders. 662 00:44:29,112 --> 00:44:33,062 There's Cleon. He's leader of the Diamond Kings, the black gang. 663 00:44:33,241 --> 00:44:38,034 - I seen him kill a man with his fist. - That's right! Yeah! 664 00:44:38,205 --> 00:44:42,582 Then there's Juanito. He's head of the Mexican gang. 665 00:44:42,751 --> 00:44:44,743 Hey, get back. Hey! 666 00:44:44,920 --> 00:44:48,585 And whatever you do, don't go near those guys. 667 00:44:48,757 --> 00:44:53,917 - The goal is to express ourselves... - They're Scientologists. 668 00:44:54,095 --> 00:44:57,630 - They don't look so tough. - Yeah. They'll talk your ear off 669 00:44:57,807 --> 00:45:00,298 - and then sue your ass. ...distinguish fear. 670 00:45:00,476 --> 00:45:04,426 Then there's the Nazis. None of them are too tough. 671 00:45:04,605 --> 00:45:08,685 They don't fight fair and don't fight alone. They always gang up on you. 672 00:45:08,860 --> 00:45:11,777 Their leader, Patterson, he's a real bastard. 673 00:45:11,946 --> 00:45:15,397 His uncle's the head of the Aryan Nation. 674 00:45:15,575 --> 00:45:17,401 Let me clarify my question, Shorts. 675 00:45:17,576 --> 00:45:20,246 Who's the most dangerous sexual predator? 676 00:45:20,413 --> 00:45:22,370 Oh, that's easy. 677 00:45:22,540 --> 00:45:25,706 It's Big Raymond. Absolutely insatiable. 678 00:45:25,876 --> 00:45:28,877 Crazy. The other black guys don't go near him. 679 00:45:29,046 --> 00:45:32,711 But they'd back him up if it came to a fight. 680 00:45:32,883 --> 00:45:35,125 Big Raymond it is. 681 00:45:35,302 --> 00:45:37,176 - Can I borrow that? - Yeah. 682 00:45:37,346 --> 00:45:38,840 Thanks. 683 00:45:40,557 --> 00:45:43,262 Hey, Stan. Stan, where you going? 684 00:45:43,435 --> 00:45:46,306 You think that cigarette was free? Is that what you think? 685 00:45:46,480 --> 00:45:49,149 I'll pay you back, man. I don't have any money. 686 00:45:49,316 --> 00:45:51,771 You think I want money? 687 00:45:52,986 --> 00:45:54,149 Mmm... 688 00:45:54,321 --> 00:45:57,903 - Excuse me. - Bug off, bitch! 689 00:45:58,074 --> 00:46:00,482 I'll get to you later. 690 00:46:00,660 --> 00:46:02,534 Did you just call me bitch? 691 00:46:03,997 --> 00:46:05,954 Yeah, I said it. 692 00:46:09,794 --> 00:46:11,917 Hey, everybody! Did you hear that? 693 00:46:12,088 --> 00:46:15,291 Big Raymond, for no reason, just called me bitch! 694 00:46:15,466 --> 00:46:17,174 Now, was that nice? 695 00:46:17,343 --> 00:46:20,095 - [muttering] - It's not like I called him fat. 696 00:46:21,389 --> 00:46:24,509 It's not like I said I seen pig shit prettier than he is. 697 00:46:27,103 --> 00:46:30,803 It's not like I said his mother's pussy smells like egg salad. 698 00:46:31,899 --> 00:46:33,524 Which it does. 699 00:46:40,199 --> 00:46:41,777 [men shouting] 700 00:46:41,951 --> 00:46:45,070 [man] Oh, hell nah! Ohhh, hell nah! 701 00:46:45,246 --> 00:46:48,449 Hell nah! Oh, hell nah! 702 00:46:48,624 --> 00:46:50,498 Ho-ho! Yeah! 703 00:46:50,668 --> 00:46:53,075 [shouting] 704 00:46:59,218 --> 00:47:01,791 [cracking] 705 00:47:02,429 --> 00:47:04,220 [screaming] 706 00:47:04,389 --> 00:47:07,805 - [snapping] - Ah! Ah! 707 00:47:07,976 --> 00:47:10,597 Ahhh! 708 00:47:10,771 --> 00:47:12,644 [screaming] 709 00:47:12,814 --> 00:47:14,439 Who's the bitch now, bitch? 710 00:47:14,608 --> 00:47:16,150 [continues screaming] 711 00:47:16,318 --> 00:47:17,646 [all] Ooh! 712 00:47:17,819 --> 00:47:20,737 I told you Raymond was gonna get his ass beat. I told you! 713 00:47:20,905 --> 00:47:24,156 [cheering] 714 00:47:24,326 --> 00:47:27,113 [laughing] My cracker! 715 00:47:27,287 --> 00:47:29,742 Laying the boot to the big nigga. Give it up! 716 00:47:29,914 --> 00:47:32,785 Don't use that word around me. It's ugly and racist. 717 00:47:34,294 --> 00:47:38,042 - [all laugh] - [man] Yeah, dawg! 718 00:47:39,465 --> 00:47:41,339 He's funny too, man. 719 00:47:41,509 --> 00:47:44,344 All right, listen here, player. All right? 720 00:47:44,512 --> 00:47:48,130 We want you to join up with us, nah mean? Them niggas is gonna tear... 721 00:47:48,307 --> 00:47:50,430 [man] Ooh! 722 00:47:50,601 --> 00:47:52,475 I said don't talk that way around me. 723 00:47:52,645 --> 00:47:54,020 Let me get some of that! 724 00:47:54,188 --> 00:47:57,272 - [man] Let's kill him. - No, I got it, I got it. I got it! 725 00:47:58,109 --> 00:47:59,982 Handle your business, Cleon. 726 00:48:03,572 --> 00:48:07,273 Oh, come on. Don't tell me you're gonna stick up for that fat son of a bitch. 727 00:48:07,451 --> 00:48:10,785 You happen to see the colour of that fat son of a bitch's skin? 728 00:48:10,954 --> 00:48:13,161 Hey, aren't we over that? 729 00:48:13,332 --> 00:48:16,119 Didn't you see that Nova episode? Huh, you guys? 730 00:48:16,293 --> 00:48:18,333 They did that DNA test. 731 00:48:18,504 --> 00:48:20,959 - We all come from Africa. - [man] Kick his ass. 732 00:48:21,131 --> 00:48:25,378 It's a proven fact. Under the skin, I'm just as black as you are. 733 00:48:25,552 --> 00:48:27,011 - [man] Fuck that. - Get him! 734 00:48:27,179 --> 00:48:30,879 - [man] Get him, man! Get him! Get him! - Motherfucker! 735 00:48:31,057 --> 00:48:33,928 [grunting] 736 00:48:37,314 --> 00:48:39,271 - Get him! - Ah! 737 00:48:43,486 --> 00:48:45,693 [shouting] 738 00:48:50,493 --> 00:48:52,201 Man, get that fool! 739 00:49:05,049 --> 00:49:06,294 Dumb bitch! 740 00:49:10,596 --> 00:49:12,388 Hold on. See what happens. 741 00:49:12,556 --> 00:49:15,760 - [shouting] - [grunts] 742 00:49:19,230 --> 00:49:21,353 - Oh! - Ah! 743 00:49:38,457 --> 00:49:40,663 [all] Oh! 744 00:49:47,340 --> 00:49:50,128 - [man] Take the stick! - [man 2] No, don't take it! 745 00:49:56,933 --> 00:49:59,851 - [man 3] Take the stick! - [man 2] No, don't take it! 746 00:50:01,604 --> 00:50:03,478 Oh, he did it again. 747 00:50:09,028 --> 00:50:11,235 - [man] Take the stick! Take it! - Mm-hm? 748 00:50:11,406 --> 00:50:14,075 - [all shouting] - [man 2] No, no, don't take it! 749 00:50:18,704 --> 00:50:20,364 Whoo! 750 00:50:22,792 --> 00:50:25,081 [man 2] I told him not to take that stick. 751 00:50:33,052 --> 00:50:35,009 [man] Even the Asian! 752 00:50:35,596 --> 00:50:37,589 Where the hell did that guy come from? 753 00:50:37,765 --> 00:50:39,639 - Whoo! - [man] Damn! 754 00:50:39,808 --> 00:50:42,015 - [man 2] That guy's good. - [man 3] All right. 755 00:50:42,186 --> 00:50:44,060 [man 4] Come on, Cleon. 756 00:50:44,229 --> 00:50:46,899 [man 5] It's your time, baby. Don't be scared. 757 00:50:47,066 --> 00:50:49,272 [man 6] It's your time to shine, Cleon. 758 00:50:50,235 --> 00:50:51,516 [all] Ooh! 759 00:50:54,490 --> 00:50:56,529 [Stan] Cleon. 760 00:50:56,700 --> 00:51:00,828 If you wanna fight me, you're gonna have to fight me. 761 00:51:00,996 --> 00:51:04,116 - I understand. - Pick up your gold teeth. 762 00:51:04,291 --> 00:51:07,790 I'm gonna let you keep them this time. 763 00:51:07,961 --> 00:51:10,001 But if you come at me again... 764 00:51:10,630 --> 00:51:13,038 ...I'm gonna hang onto them like a Swiss banker. 765 00:51:28,481 --> 00:51:30,937 [Cleon] Ya'll ain't gonna help me? 766 00:51:31,109 --> 00:51:33,778 I'm missing a bicuspid. 767 00:51:35,238 --> 00:51:37,645 We should have killed him. 768 00:51:37,824 --> 00:51:41,773 [sobbing] Somebody, call an orthodontist. 769 00:51:46,415 --> 00:51:49,950 Hm. I see Mr. Minton has acquainted himself 770 00:51:50,127 --> 00:51:52,334 with his new surroundings. 771 00:51:53,380 --> 00:51:56,334 I believe it's time I had my little chat with him. 772 00:52:01,430 --> 00:52:02,889 Ow! 773 00:52:05,017 --> 00:52:08,635 - [indistinct chatter] - Whoa, whoa, look out. 774 00:52:08,812 --> 00:52:10,852 Beat it. All of you. 775 00:52:21,158 --> 00:52:25,451 Oh, man, this stuff's good. I don't know what everybody's complaining about. 776 00:52:25,620 --> 00:52:27,412 You're kidding me. 777 00:52:27,581 --> 00:52:30,665 Hey, man. I just wanna say thanks. 778 00:52:31,960 --> 00:52:32,991 For what? 779 00:52:34,838 --> 00:52:37,673 You know, for helping me before. 780 00:52:37,841 --> 00:52:39,039 With Big Raymond. 781 00:52:39,217 --> 00:52:42,088 I wasn't helping you. I was helping me. 782 00:52:42,971 --> 00:52:46,968 I had to beat up the biggest shithead. He happened to be talking to you. 783 00:52:47,892 --> 00:52:49,434 OK. 784 00:52:50,561 --> 00:52:53,728 But, you know, I... I mean, I... 785 00:52:53,898 --> 00:52:55,891 I think that guy wanted to fuck me. 786 00:52:59,737 --> 00:53:03,735 Trust me, in your case, I was just putting off the inevitable. 787 00:53:05,201 --> 00:53:09,495 [speaking Spanish] 788 00:53:09,663 --> 00:53:12,949 - [man makes kissing sound] - Yeah. 789 00:53:13,125 --> 00:53:14,536 Well, thanks anyway. 790 00:53:16,378 --> 00:53:19,830 [man] What's your name, girl? Don't be shy, just say hi. 791 00:53:20,716 --> 00:53:23,124 Come here. Kick back, baby girl! 792 00:53:23,302 --> 00:53:26,303 Little hard on the kid, weren't you? 793 00:53:26,472 --> 00:53:29,757 That's got nothing to do with me. And I'm gonna keep it that way. 794 00:53:29,933 --> 00:53:32,175 - You got that? - Mm-hm. 795 00:53:48,201 --> 00:53:50,408 [Bullard] One-one-five! 796 00:53:53,248 --> 00:53:56,664 Minton, warden wants to see you. Get up. 797 00:53:56,835 --> 00:53:59,207 - Me? - Now! Walk! 798 00:54:00,421 --> 00:54:02,129 Put your hands behind your back. 799 00:54:05,635 --> 00:54:08,802 - [knocking on door] - Come in. 800 00:54:13,351 --> 00:54:15,723 Minton, I'm glad you could make it. 801 00:54:15,895 --> 00:54:19,264 - You can take the cuffs off him. - Sure you wanna do that, Boss? 802 00:54:19,440 --> 00:54:21,516 I said take 'em off. 803 00:54:21,692 --> 00:54:24,266 It's all right. 804 00:54:24,445 --> 00:54:25,725 I already got 'em. 805 00:54:27,782 --> 00:54:29,821 It's a matter of dislocating the wrists. 806 00:54:29,992 --> 00:54:31,652 [snaps] 807 00:54:32,745 --> 00:54:34,572 [cracks] 808 00:54:34,747 --> 00:54:38,614 Ew! Ew, that is creepy! 809 00:54:38,792 --> 00:54:42,042 - You can wait outside. - [shudders] 810 00:54:43,088 --> 00:54:44,203 Have a seat. 811 00:54:50,012 --> 00:54:52,847 Warden, if this is about me fighting in the yard, it... 812 00:54:53,015 --> 00:54:54,509 Cigar? 813 00:54:56,309 --> 00:54:57,768 Thank you. 814 00:55:01,523 --> 00:55:02,721 Brandy? 815 00:55:04,442 --> 00:55:06,649 Sure. 816 00:55:16,538 --> 00:55:18,577 You know, you wardens should complain. 817 00:55:18,748 --> 00:55:22,960 'Cause in the movies, they always make you look like assholes. 818 00:55:23,127 --> 00:55:28,204 [laughs] Well, I don't plan on being a warden forever. 819 00:55:28,383 --> 00:55:31,004 - Is that right? - Tell me, Minton. 820 00:55:31,177 --> 00:55:33,549 What do you think of this place? 821 00:55:35,014 --> 00:55:37,422 It's OK, for a prison. 822 00:55:37,600 --> 00:55:41,811 Not the prison. The land. 823 00:55:45,316 --> 00:55:50,191 It's a nice sized property. Great views of the foothills and city. Level grade. 824 00:55:50,362 --> 00:55:53,696 I'm assuming there's bedrock beneath us. 825 00:55:53,866 --> 00:55:58,611 Easy access to downtown. I see some nice development potential. 826 00:55:58,787 --> 00:56:01,954 - Too bad you got a prison on it. - Exactly. 827 00:56:02,124 --> 00:56:06,453 You know, it's no accident you came to Oaksburg. 828 00:56:06,628 --> 00:56:09,499 I pulled a few strings to get you here. 829 00:56:12,592 --> 00:56:14,252 What made you wanna do that? 830 00:56:16,638 --> 00:56:18,097 Come here. 831 00:56:21,977 --> 00:56:25,096 Oaksburg Estates. 832 00:56:25,272 --> 00:56:29,684 I'm a silent partner, so to speak, with some private investors 833 00:56:29,859 --> 00:56:35,150 who would like to develop this land into timeshare condominiums. 834 00:56:35,323 --> 00:56:39,190 I believe that's your field of expertise. 835 00:56:39,369 --> 00:56:42,785 - True. - 'Course, all this is only possible 836 00:56:42,956 --> 00:56:45,743 in the event the prison ever closes down. 837 00:56:45,917 --> 00:56:49,582 - Makes sense. - You know, I'm in the prison business. 838 00:56:49,754 --> 00:56:52,423 I know how to break a man's will, crush his spirit. 839 00:56:52,590 --> 00:56:56,801 But them real estate contracts, those things put a real hurt on you. 840 00:56:56,969 --> 00:56:58,511 That's where you come in. 841 00:57:03,267 --> 00:57:06,221 - What's in it for me? - How would you like to be out of here 842 00:57:06,395 --> 00:57:07,426 in a year? 843 00:57:09,648 --> 00:57:13,978 - But I've got a mandatory minimum. - Wardens have great discretion 844 00:57:14,153 --> 00:57:18,980 getting early parole, especially to non-violent, first-time offenders. 845 00:57:19,158 --> 00:57:23,819 - Prisons are crowded, you know. - The system is corrupt. 846 00:57:23,996 --> 00:57:25,241 Me likey. 847 00:57:25,414 --> 00:57:28,996 But you gotta move the luxury units closer to the lagoon. 848 00:57:29,167 --> 00:57:31,837 That'll double rents. Parking goes underground. 849 00:57:32,004 --> 00:57:35,419 Wasting space. Eight extra units. Whoever designed this is a moron. 850 00:57:35,590 --> 00:57:38,591 - How will you get rid of the prison? - Let me worry about that. 851 00:57:38,760 --> 00:57:41,085 Tell me more about them parking spaces. 852 00:57:46,434 --> 00:57:50,728 [Stan singing in Spanish] 853 00:58:06,662 --> 00:58:09,035 You strapped? 854 00:58:09,207 --> 00:58:11,579 He ain't gonna know what hit him, nah mean? 855 00:58:24,013 --> 00:58:25,044 Ah! 856 00:58:27,933 --> 00:58:30,258 That's gonna scar, you psycho. 857 00:58:35,357 --> 00:58:37,397 - Whoo! - [grunts] 858 00:58:48,161 --> 00:58:50,119 You want that shiv, don't you? 859 00:58:51,790 --> 00:58:54,660 You made that with a melted toothbrush and a razorblade? 860 00:58:54,835 --> 00:58:56,578 - That's very creative. - Ah! 861 00:59:02,759 --> 00:59:06,009 Look what I made with three bars of soap and a shoelace. 862 00:59:07,263 --> 00:59:09,173 [chuckles] Cracker, please. 863 00:59:09,349 --> 00:59:12,800 Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! 864 00:59:16,522 --> 00:59:18,182 [high-pitched warbling] 865 00:59:19,984 --> 00:59:22,143 [high-pitched warbling] 866 00:59:26,908 --> 00:59:28,900 Come on, race traitor. 867 00:59:31,579 --> 00:59:33,737 - Ah! - Ooh! 868 00:59:35,958 --> 00:59:38,330 [high-pitched warbling] 869 00:59:40,337 --> 00:59:41,962 Oh! 870 00:59:42,673 --> 00:59:45,378 - [neck cracks] - Ha! 871 00:59:45,551 --> 00:59:47,709 Hee-yah! 872 00:59:49,680 --> 00:59:51,304 He's all yours. 873 00:59:53,267 --> 00:59:54,891 This gonna be fun. 874 00:59:55,144 --> 00:59:57,432 [all shouting] 875 01:00:04,695 --> 01:00:08,562 Hey, Stan. What'd you do to Patterson? 876 01:00:08,740 --> 01:00:11,112 I just roughed him up a little bit. 877 01:00:11,284 --> 01:00:15,033 - Why? - Somebody took a shiv to his ass. 878 01:00:15,205 --> 01:00:19,914 They say he'll be shitting sideways for a month. [laughs] 879 01:00:20,085 --> 01:00:22,920 Now I know what schadenfreude feels like. 880 01:00:23,088 --> 01:00:24,961 - What? - Schadenfreude. 881 01:00:25,131 --> 01:00:28,880 It's German for when you feel good because your enemy's anus is violated. 882 01:00:29,052 --> 01:00:31,009 Oh. 883 01:00:35,099 --> 01:00:36,891 You know you're getting that on me. 884 01:00:40,897 --> 01:00:43,814 [Stan on phone] I'm doing great. You guys are pussies. 885 01:00:43,983 --> 01:00:48,444 That's terrific. Hey, listen, pal. I need your help. 886 01:00:48,613 --> 01:00:51,863 I can't get Mindy's lawyer to return my call. 887 01:00:52,033 --> 01:00:54,440 If we wanna go through with this divorce, 888 01:00:54,618 --> 01:00:57,987 you're going to have to contact her personally. 889 01:00:58,914 --> 01:01:00,195 Stan. 890 01:01:00,374 --> 01:01:02,034 Yeah. I'll get right on that. 891 01:01:02,209 --> 01:01:05,625 - How's the appeal coming? - [laughs] 892 01:01:05,796 --> 01:01:10,754 Believe it or not, I'm looking at the Madam Foreman right now. 893 01:01:10,926 --> 01:01:12,717 - [laughs] - That's great. 894 01:01:12,886 --> 01:01:18,307 [stammering] I gotta go now. You know, duty calls. 895 01:01:18,475 --> 01:01:20,764 All right. Thanks, Lew. I'll talk to you soon. 896 01:01:23,188 --> 01:01:25,809 [grunting, farting] 897 01:01:29,611 --> 01:01:32,980 Ain't you Charlize Theron? 898 01:01:34,491 --> 01:01:37,575 Oh, look what fell out there. 899 01:01:43,833 --> 01:01:47,368 [laughing] So I had them exchange the beef for horse meat. 900 01:01:47,545 --> 01:01:50,582 - Clever. - That's Stan. 901 01:01:50,757 --> 01:01:53,164 Minton, I'd like for you to meet Mr. Dang. 902 01:01:53,343 --> 01:01:55,382 He's on the prison's board of governors. 903 01:01:55,553 --> 01:01:59,598 They let Vietnamese mafia on the prison board of governors? 904 01:02:01,392 --> 01:02:02,555 Your finger tats. 905 01:02:03,936 --> 01:02:09,560 [laughs] Like you say, Stan, the system is corrupt. 906 01:02:09,734 --> 01:02:13,897 Mr. Dang's family happens to be my partners in Oaksburg Estates. 907 01:02:14,071 --> 01:02:16,823 Oh, good, 'cause I was just going over the contracts. 908 01:02:16,991 --> 01:02:20,110 The language gets rather vague on gross versus net liability. 909 01:02:20,286 --> 01:02:23,785 I'm sure it's unintentional, but that could screw you in the long run. 910 01:02:23,956 --> 01:02:28,950 Could it? I'll have my lawyers correct that immediately. 911 01:02:29,128 --> 01:02:32,579 I got an excellent lawyer for that. He specialises in it. Lew Popper. 912 01:02:32,756 --> 01:02:36,207 Popper? I'll be sure to contact him. 913 01:02:36,385 --> 01:02:40,252 [laughs] Come on, Dang, let's check out the floor show. 914 01:02:44,142 --> 01:02:45,850 [shouting] 915 01:02:46,019 --> 01:02:49,554 It looks like the savages are ready for the inspection. 916 01:02:49,731 --> 01:02:54,440 [Gasque] Well, give me a few more weeks. I'll even have 'em readier. 917 01:02:54,611 --> 01:02:56,568 [Dang] I'm counting on that. 918 01:02:58,031 --> 01:03:00,237 Would you like a strawberry? 919 01:03:01,576 --> 01:03:04,779 - I grew them in my own garden. - Thank you. 920 01:03:04,954 --> 01:03:07,445 Minton? Strawberry? 921 01:03:08,541 --> 01:03:09,656 No, I'm good. 922 01:03:15,548 --> 01:03:18,668 [Gasque] Maybe I picked 'em a little too soon. 923 01:03:20,636 --> 01:03:22,593 I don't think that's it. 924 01:03:24,015 --> 01:03:26,588 [Stan on phone] People are scared shitless of me. 925 01:03:26,767 --> 01:03:28,096 Very good, Stan. 926 01:03:28,269 --> 01:03:30,558 Is there anyone there who can challenge you? 927 01:03:30,730 --> 01:03:33,434 Nah. I got it all under control. 928 01:03:33,607 --> 01:03:35,766 What's the matter, Stan? 929 01:03:35,943 --> 01:03:39,146 You sound... distant. 930 01:03:39,321 --> 01:03:41,029 I don't know. It's just... 931 01:03:41,198 --> 01:03:44,899 Don't you ever find yourself feeling sorry for anybody? 932 01:03:45,077 --> 01:03:48,742 You might as well ask me if I feel sorry for the maggots 933 01:03:48,914 --> 01:03:50,788 I grind into my morning coffee. 934 01:03:50,958 --> 01:03:54,492 [laughs] That's how I feel too. Listen, I gotta go. 935 01:03:54,670 --> 01:03:57,540 Make me proud, Stan. 936 01:03:57,714 --> 01:04:00,384 [woman] Come on, baby! Do it to me! 937 01:04:00,550 --> 01:04:02,876 - [Popper] Oh, yeah! - [woman] Are you using me? 938 01:04:03,053 --> 01:04:05,259 - [Popper] No! - [woman] Don't you love me? 939 01:04:05,430 --> 01:04:07,506 - [Popper] Yeah! - [woman] Show me! 940 01:04:07,682 --> 01:04:11,051 - [phone rings] - [shouting] 941 01:04:14,731 --> 01:04:17,767 - Do you love me? - Yeah. Hello. Hey! 942 01:04:17,942 --> 01:04:20,860 Excuse me. Excuse me. Yeah. 943 01:04:21,029 --> 01:04:23,864 Hi, Stan. Yeah. I think I have good news. 944 01:04:24,032 --> 01:04:27,981 - [woman] Do you love me? - Yeah. I think the... I think the... 945 01:04:28,161 --> 01:04:33,582 The Madam Foreman is just one orgasm away from giving you your appeal. 946 01:04:33,750 --> 01:04:36,537 [Stan] That's great, Lew. And gross. 947 01:04:36,711 --> 01:04:38,750 Heard from Mindy or her attorney? 948 01:04:38,921 --> 01:04:40,997 Uh, no. 949 01:04:41,174 --> 01:04:45,005 But don't say I don't earn my money. [laughs] 950 01:04:50,558 --> 01:04:54,390 Hi, fellas. I don't believe I ordered Chinese. 951 01:04:57,940 --> 01:05:01,558 I guess I could go for a little pot-sticker. 952 01:05:06,448 --> 01:05:08,240 [Shorts] Who are you writing to? 953 01:05:08,409 --> 01:05:10,734 No one special. 954 01:05:12,037 --> 01:05:15,371 You've been sitting there for a while writing to no one special. 955 01:05:17,584 --> 01:05:22,626 You know, Stan, I've been here for a long time. I can handle a lot of things. 956 01:05:22,798 --> 01:05:26,498 Like having to spend the rest of my life in this shithole. 957 01:05:26,676 --> 01:05:29,926 But there's one thing I do regret. 958 01:05:30,096 --> 01:05:33,596 I could never make it work with Miyoshi. 959 01:05:33,767 --> 01:05:39,769 Oh, she was the only person who ever loved me for me. 960 01:05:41,733 --> 01:05:44,817 I was too pigheaded to realise it. 961 01:05:44,986 --> 01:05:50,325 [sighs] I'd give anything to change the way I behaved. 962 01:05:51,159 --> 01:05:52,950 How did you behave? 963 01:05:54,078 --> 01:05:55,241 I killed her. 964 01:05:56,914 --> 01:05:58,243 Oh. 965 01:05:58,416 --> 01:06:03,243 Alcohol wasn't something that always brought out the best in me, Stan. 966 01:06:23,399 --> 01:06:27,479 [Stan] Dear Mindy, I've been thinking a lot about you lately. 967 01:06:27,653 --> 01:06:29,444 About us. 968 01:06:29,613 --> 01:06:31,771 I realise now that you were right. 969 01:06:31,949 --> 01:06:35,318 I was pigheaded and selfish. 970 01:06:35,494 --> 01:06:39,076 Leaving me was probably the best thing for you. 971 01:06:39,247 --> 01:06:41,240 And I'm truly sorry. 972 01:06:41,416 --> 01:06:44,121 I never should have hurt you. 973 01:06:44,294 --> 01:06:47,330 I know now why you wanted to have a baby with me. 974 01:06:47,505 --> 01:06:49,794 It's just another way for us to love each other 975 01:06:49,966 --> 01:06:52,718 even more deeply. 976 01:06:52,886 --> 01:06:56,420 I hope, someday, you'll be able to forgive me. 977 01:06:56,598 --> 01:06:59,515 Love always, Stan. 978 01:07:04,939 --> 01:07:06,647 [The Master] Hey, baby. 979 01:07:15,366 --> 01:07:19,364 Now, I know all of you want to get back to your weightlifting and basketball 980 01:07:19,537 --> 01:07:22,988 and masturbating, so I'm gonna try to keep this short. All right? 981 01:07:23,165 --> 01:07:28,670 I am throwing away all of these violent video games and movies. 982 01:07:28,838 --> 01:07:30,462 [all groaning] 983 01:07:30,631 --> 01:07:33,087 Don't do that! No! Come on, man! 984 01:07:33,259 --> 01:07:36,793 From now on, I want you guys watching more wholesome entertainment. 985 01:07:36,971 --> 01:07:40,470 And frankly, a lot of the rap music you brothers listen to 986 01:07:40,641 --> 01:07:43,096 - was too hateful towards women. - [all laughing] 987 01:07:43,268 --> 01:07:46,353 What is up with that? You like women, right? 988 01:07:46,522 --> 01:07:47,720 [all] Yeah! 989 01:07:47,898 --> 01:07:49,641 Now, on the other hand, 990 01:07:49,816 --> 01:07:53,020 the Mexicans are onto something with mariachi and salsa music. 991 01:07:53,195 --> 01:07:55,401 [cheering] 992 01:07:56,948 --> 01:08:00,282 It's positive, easy to dance to and you never get tired of it. 993 01:08:00,452 --> 01:08:03,322 - Shorts, give us a taste. - Here we go. 994 01:08:03,497 --> 01:08:08,289 [salsa music plays] 995 01:08:08,460 --> 01:08:10,536 [man singing in Spanish] 996 01:08:12,839 --> 01:08:14,630 [cheering, whistling] 997 01:08:18,470 --> 01:08:19,964 [cheering] 998 01:08:38,948 --> 01:08:40,572 Holy shit. 999 01:08:42,743 --> 01:08:45,744 - All right. All right, all right. - [music stops] 1000 01:08:45,913 --> 01:08:49,448 That's Afro-Cuban. I asked for mariachi. But you get the point. 1001 01:08:49,625 --> 01:08:52,828 All right? Now, lastly, and most importantly, 1002 01:08:53,003 --> 01:08:55,921 from now on, there will be no more rape at this prison. 1003 01:08:56,090 --> 01:08:58,628 - [all shouting] - No, no! 1004 01:08:58,801 --> 01:09:02,170 That's right. Anyone who rapes another inmate 1005 01:09:02,346 --> 01:09:05,216 - will have to answer to me. - [man] Boo! 1006 01:09:05,390 --> 01:09:07,098 [Stan] I will not be kind. 1007 01:09:07,267 --> 01:09:10,138 - Excuse me, Big Stan. - Yes, Juanito. 1008 01:09:10,312 --> 01:09:12,767 Why you putting your nose where it don't belong? 1009 01:09:12,939 --> 01:09:15,181 My men are aggressive and hard. 1010 01:09:15,359 --> 01:09:19,226 Sometimes they need a way to work off that excess energy. What's it to you? 1011 01:09:19,404 --> 01:09:22,405 - OK. Well, first off, good question. - Thank you. 1012 01:09:22,574 --> 01:09:26,785 What is it to me? Well, frankly, I just don't like it. 1013 01:09:26,953 --> 01:09:30,821 And let me show you why. Robbie, come up here. 1014 01:09:30,999 --> 01:09:32,873 You, Robbie the hippie. Come up here. 1015 01:09:33,042 --> 01:09:35,368 [all whistling] 1016 01:09:37,755 --> 01:09:41,670 All right, all right. Robbie, how long is your sentence here at Oaksburg? 1017 01:09:41,843 --> 01:09:45,757 - Five to ten. - Five to ten years. 1018 01:09:45,930 --> 01:09:48,801 What exactly did you do to earn that sentence? 1019 01:09:48,975 --> 01:09:52,474 - I sold marijuana. - [laughter] 1020 01:09:52,645 --> 01:09:56,310 - A shitload of marijuana. - [cheering] 1021 01:09:58,526 --> 01:10:00,684 Thanks, Robbie. Go sit down. 1022 01:10:00,861 --> 01:10:04,396 He sold marijuana. He was a marijuana dealer. 1023 01:10:04,573 --> 01:10:08,488 I'm not here to argue about drug policy. I don't think they're tough enough. 1024 01:10:08,661 --> 01:10:12,361 - [protesting] - Whatever. 1025 01:10:12,539 --> 01:10:15,908 But just because Robbie was guilty of selling dope 1026 01:10:16,085 --> 01:10:21,079 doesn't mean he deserves to get raped up the ass every day for ten years. 1027 01:10:21,256 --> 01:10:23,498 I just don't think that's fair. 1028 01:10:23,675 --> 01:10:26,712 - [murmuring] - Some of you are here 1029 01:10:26,887 --> 01:10:32,842 because you're habitual drunk drivers. Some of you have a fondness for crack. 1030 01:10:33,018 --> 01:10:36,184 - [laughing, murmuring] - Some of you robbed a bank. 1031 01:10:36,354 --> 01:10:40,019 - I'm talking to you, Lee Otis. - [laughing] 1032 01:10:42,360 --> 01:10:46,192 But that doesn't mean you should get raped. It's just not fair. 1033 01:10:47,866 --> 01:10:51,365 - Yes, Carnahan. - What about guys convicted of rape? 1034 01:10:51,536 --> 01:10:54,869 - Can we rape them? - [all] Yeah! 1035 01:10:55,039 --> 01:10:57,115 Rape the rapists. Seems appropriate. 1036 01:10:57,292 --> 01:10:59,830 Punishment fitting the crime and all. Go ahead. 1037 01:11:00,003 --> 01:11:02,873 - [cheering] - [man] That's what I'm talkin' about. 1038 01:11:03,047 --> 01:11:07,626 - How about them child molesters? - [all] Yeah! 1039 01:11:07,802 --> 01:11:10,174 Yeah, them too. Good point. Anyone else? 1040 01:11:10,346 --> 01:11:12,837 [cheering] 1041 01:11:15,518 --> 01:11:16,716 [Big Raymond] Big Stan! 1042 01:11:16,894 --> 01:11:21,223 - What about the counterfeiters? - [all] What? 1043 01:11:21,399 --> 01:11:25,728 Counterfeiters? Big Raymond, you're the only counterfeiter here. 1044 01:11:25,903 --> 01:11:28,738 [man] Yeah! 1045 01:11:28,906 --> 01:11:32,073 Wait a minute. Do you just want somebody to... 1046 01:11:32,242 --> 01:11:34,615 [all] Aw! 1047 01:11:34,787 --> 01:11:36,945 OK, here's another thing we gotta clear up. 1048 01:11:37,122 --> 01:11:40,242 There's a difference between homosexual sex and rape. 1049 01:11:40,417 --> 01:11:44,000 - Now, Big Raymond. - Hm? 1050 01:11:44,171 --> 01:11:47,006 There's someone here who wants to have sex with you. 1051 01:11:47,174 --> 01:11:49,665 - [man] Not me! - OK? How about it, anyone? 1052 01:11:51,678 --> 01:11:54,762 Yeah. Yeah. 1053 01:11:54,931 --> 01:11:57,339 [laughter] 1054 01:11:59,186 --> 01:12:01,095 Tyler! 1055 01:12:01,271 --> 01:12:05,814 - Great! - Man! [giggles] 1056 01:12:15,326 --> 01:12:18,446 You two have fun. But wear protection. 1057 01:12:18,621 --> 01:12:20,614 - [cheering] - [Big Raymond] OK. 1058 01:12:20,790 --> 01:12:25,499 All right, grow up. Look, if you've got a problem with that, then that's... 1059 01:12:25,670 --> 01:12:27,995 [farting, groaning] 1060 01:12:29,423 --> 01:12:30,882 Nurse! 1061 01:12:32,301 --> 01:12:33,961 [farts] 1062 01:12:35,972 --> 01:12:37,003 [farts] 1063 01:12:37,181 --> 01:12:41,048 Now, those two are about to have consensual homosexual sex. 1064 01:12:41,227 --> 01:12:44,228 A beautiful, beautiful thing. The total opposite of rape, 1065 01:12:44,396 --> 01:12:47,600 - which is not allowed. - Except for rapists and molesters? 1066 01:12:47,775 --> 01:12:49,981 - We can still rape them. - No, you can't. 1067 01:12:50,152 --> 01:12:53,568 - [all] What? - I changed my mind. 1068 01:12:53,739 --> 01:12:55,316 Bad habit. Quit cold turkey. 1069 01:12:55,491 --> 01:12:58,906 - [all yelling] - If you're not happy with it, 1070 01:12:59,077 --> 01:13:02,826 - you're welcome to fight me. - [groaning] 1071 01:13:03,749 --> 01:13:06,322 I didn't think so. All right, you're dismissed. 1072 01:13:06,501 --> 01:13:08,708 Beat it. 1073 01:13:10,130 --> 01:13:12,621 - Good speech. - You think? 1074 01:13:12,799 --> 01:13:15,717 - I should have opened with a joke. - No, it was good. 1075 01:13:15,886 --> 01:13:19,171 - Yeah? - Yeah. Sorry about the mariachi. 1076 01:13:19,347 --> 01:13:20,545 Let it go. 1077 01:13:22,559 --> 01:13:26,971 Hey, Big Stan. Check out the lovebirds. 1078 01:13:29,566 --> 01:13:32,483 - One for you! - [giggles] 1079 01:13:32,652 --> 01:13:35,569 Mm! One for you. 1080 01:13:36,739 --> 01:13:37,937 Good for them. 1081 01:13:39,575 --> 01:13:41,817 I have something important to show you. 1082 01:13:41,994 --> 01:13:43,157 Let me eat, will you? 1083 01:13:43,329 --> 01:13:44,574 Hey, Big Stan. 1084 01:13:46,624 --> 01:13:50,040 - Can we talk? - Make it quick. 1085 01:13:50,211 --> 01:13:52,417 I wanna thank you for what you did out there. 1086 01:13:52,588 --> 01:13:55,957 - I didn't do anything... - Don't say you didn't do it for me. 1087 01:13:56,133 --> 01:13:59,300 Because you did, didn't you? 1088 01:14:00,638 --> 01:14:03,841 - A little. - Well, thanks. 1089 01:14:04,016 --> 01:14:07,432 - Yeah. Thanks, man. - [Juanito] Julio! 1090 01:14:07,603 --> 01:14:10,308 Get back here! What's up with you? [speaks Spanish] 1091 01:14:10,481 --> 01:14:11,595 Shut up! 1092 01:14:13,025 --> 01:14:14,602 [speaking Spanish] 1093 01:14:14,777 --> 01:14:17,861 Hey, Big Stan. I like what you said. 1094 01:14:18,030 --> 01:14:19,440 I wanna join your gang. 1095 01:14:21,450 --> 01:14:25,150 - I don't have a gang. - Yes, you do. 1096 01:14:29,583 --> 01:14:30,781 OK, you're in. 1097 01:14:33,211 --> 01:14:36,829 [man clears throat] Me too? 1098 01:14:41,845 --> 01:14:46,341 - Yeah, you too. - [giggling] 1099 01:14:49,060 --> 01:14:51,931 - All of you. - Thanks. 1100 01:14:53,189 --> 01:14:56,523 - [laughing] - Yeah! Ow! 1101 01:14:56,693 --> 01:14:59,100 All right, can I eat now? 1102 01:15:01,697 --> 01:15:04,901 - [Big Raymond] Yes, you did! - He's gotta eat. 1103 01:15:08,704 --> 01:15:11,374 I told you I had something important to show you. 1104 01:15:17,713 --> 01:15:18,828 From Mindy. 1105 01:15:28,057 --> 01:15:29,467 She wants to see me. 1106 01:15:33,353 --> 01:15:35,560 [laughs] 1107 01:15:37,065 --> 01:15:38,809 Hoo-hoo-hoo! 1108 01:15:38,984 --> 01:15:41,356 [♪ Los Niños de Sara: La Cubanita] 1109 01:15:48,410 --> 01:15:52,075 [shouting, laughing] 1110 01:15:53,164 --> 01:15:54,659 Shake hands. 1111 01:15:58,169 --> 01:16:00,245 Try to get along, huh? 1112 01:16:04,300 --> 01:16:07,669 [speaking Spanish] 1113 01:16:08,513 --> 01:16:09,972 Thanks. 1114 01:16:22,318 --> 01:16:25,438 - Excuse me, man. - No, that was my bad. 1115 01:16:25,613 --> 01:16:28,234 No, really. It was my fault. 1116 01:16:28,407 --> 01:16:31,574 There's a pickup game of hoops later, if you wanna play. 1117 01:16:31,744 --> 01:16:32,823 I'd like that. 1118 01:16:36,373 --> 01:16:38,366 [cheering] 1119 01:17:13,743 --> 01:17:17,408 - Happy birthday. - Ah! Thank you! 1120 01:17:17,580 --> 01:17:20,332 - Oh, look, a shiv! - Yeah! 1121 01:17:20,500 --> 01:17:21,994 - Hey, homes. - Mm! Mm! 1122 01:17:22,168 --> 01:17:24,659 - Hey. - Hey! 1123 01:17:35,556 --> 01:17:37,216 [horn squawks] 1124 01:17:55,910 --> 01:17:58,033 Stanley! Honey bear! 1125 01:17:58,204 --> 01:18:00,492 I loved your letter! 1126 01:18:00,664 --> 01:18:03,499 - [Mindy laughs] - I missed you so much. 1127 01:18:03,667 --> 01:18:07,712 Before we go any further, there's three little words I need to hear. 1128 01:18:07,880 --> 01:18:10,834 - I was wrong? - Good boy! 1129 01:18:13,760 --> 01:18:16,761 It looks like a nursery school picnic out there. 1130 01:18:16,930 --> 01:18:18,472 It's Minton. 1131 01:18:19,683 --> 01:18:23,894 - What do you mean, it's Minton? - Well, first he banned rape. 1132 01:18:24,062 --> 01:18:26,351 It's to the point that anybody gets beat up, 1133 01:18:26,523 --> 01:18:29,773 they run and join Minton's gang and Minton beats up the bad guy. 1134 01:18:29,943 --> 01:18:33,146 The truth, he's got them too scared to look at each other funny. 1135 01:18:33,321 --> 01:18:37,070 - We ain't had a fight in three days. - I thought I saw Ingleberg fight 1136 01:18:37,242 --> 01:18:40,361 that big Mexican yesterday, Jesus. 1137 01:18:40,537 --> 01:18:44,321 Oh, no, that was more in the nature of a lovers' quarrel. 1138 01:18:44,499 --> 01:18:46,906 Ingleberg forgot their two-week anniversary. 1139 01:18:47,085 --> 01:18:49,789 That wasn't very nice of him, was it? 1140 01:18:49,963 --> 01:18:54,043 Well, they made up. You should have seen the cake Ingleberg made. 1141 01:18:54,217 --> 01:18:56,708 - It was special... - You get out of here right now 1142 01:18:56,886 --> 01:19:00,504 and get Minton up here! You understand me? I mean right now! 1143 01:19:00,681 --> 01:19:03,848 - Now hurry! - [door closes] 1144 01:19:05,478 --> 01:19:09,345 I'm not just saying this, but I think that was the most amazing sex 1145 01:19:09,523 --> 01:19:12,275 - we've ever had. - [giggles] 1146 01:19:12,443 --> 01:19:15,194 I guess being away from me this long made you crazy. 1147 01:19:15,362 --> 01:19:19,490 Well, yes, I guess. The Master's opened my eyes, sexually. 1148 01:19:19,658 --> 01:19:23,027 He showed me all these different positions in the Kama Sutra. 1149 01:19:23,203 --> 01:19:26,655 - The Master? You been seeing him? - Yeah, he's staying at the house. 1150 01:19:26,832 --> 01:19:29,952 I've learned about massage and strengthening my Kegels. 1151 01:19:30,127 --> 01:19:33,293 - [knocking on door] - That sleazy son of a bitch! 1152 01:19:33,463 --> 01:19:35,789 - [Bullard] Minton, time's up. - But Stan, I... 1153 01:19:35,966 --> 01:19:39,833 - Warden wants to see you now! - Wait. I don't want you to see him. 1154 01:19:40,011 --> 01:19:44,424 You tell Master Dickface I'm gonna get out of here soon and kick his ass! 1155 01:19:44,599 --> 01:19:46,971 Don't tell him. You're not allowed to see him. 1156 01:19:47,143 --> 01:19:49,266 I said now, convict! 1157 01:19:49,437 --> 01:19:51,145 - Minton! - Not allowed to see him! 1158 01:19:51,314 --> 01:19:53,521 - I love you, sweetie-cakes! - Let's go. 1159 01:19:53,692 --> 01:19:55,316 Cocksucker! 1160 01:20:04,827 --> 01:20:07,532 [Gasque] I'll bet you didn't know I was part psychic. 1161 01:20:09,582 --> 01:20:14,043 That's right. I'm able to see into the future. 1162 01:20:15,671 --> 01:20:18,756 - I didn't realise. - Let me tell you what's going to happen 1163 01:20:18,925 --> 01:20:21,166 one week from today. 1164 01:20:24,096 --> 01:20:27,430 The board of governors is gonna come to inspect the prison. 1165 01:20:27,600 --> 01:20:31,728 And something awful happens. 1166 01:20:31,896 --> 01:20:36,308 Some prisoners find a way to smuggle weapons into the yard. 1167 01:20:36,483 --> 01:20:39,105 And a full-scale riot breaks out. 1168 01:20:39,278 --> 01:20:43,441 And as the prison board watches in absolute horror, 1169 01:20:43,615 --> 01:20:47,743 my men are forced to shoot into the yard in order 1170 01:20:47,911 --> 01:20:50,912 to end the melee. 1171 01:20:51,081 --> 01:20:56,158 In the ensuing scandal, the Board chooses to sell the property 1172 01:20:56,336 --> 01:20:59,752 to a Vietnamese family 1173 01:20:59,923 --> 01:21:02,675 based in San Pedro. 1174 01:21:02,843 --> 01:21:06,128 And everybody lives happily ever after. 1175 01:21:07,222 --> 01:21:08,882 Especially me. 1176 01:21:09,057 --> 01:21:13,351 Now, if the events that I foretold 1177 01:21:13,520 --> 01:21:15,975 do not come to fruition... 1178 01:21:17,732 --> 01:21:21,018 ...I will be very disappointed. 1179 01:21:28,493 --> 01:21:30,569 And when I get disappointed, 1180 01:21:30,745 --> 01:21:32,951 Mr. Deng over there 1181 01:21:33,122 --> 01:21:37,867 likes to stomp on men's spines like they was bubble wrap. 1182 01:21:51,807 --> 01:21:56,386 I spent 35 years of my life 1183 01:21:56,562 --> 01:22:00,096 in this stinking cesspool. 1184 01:22:00,274 --> 01:22:04,852 And I will not walk away without something to show for it. 1185 01:22:06,155 --> 01:22:09,191 Your little prison reform ends right now. 1186 01:22:10,158 --> 01:22:14,452 You play ball, you might get yourself a parole hearing. 1187 01:22:14,621 --> 01:22:17,326 How many will get killed? 1188 01:22:17,499 --> 01:22:22,493 Who cares? They're all animals. 1189 01:22:24,631 --> 01:22:26,042 Bullard! 1190 01:22:28,385 --> 01:22:32,881 - Escort Mr. Minton back to his cell. - Yes, sir. Come on, Minton. 1191 01:22:38,520 --> 01:22:41,770 Stan, you ever have two Asian men pounding your balls 1192 01:22:41,940 --> 01:22:44,810 after sex with a questionably attractive older woman? 1193 01:22:44,984 --> 01:22:47,309 No, I can't say I have, Lew. 1194 01:22:47,487 --> 01:22:51,354 Madam Foreman won't return any of my calls. 1195 01:22:51,532 --> 01:22:54,652 You better go for that deal the warden offered you. 1196 01:22:54,827 --> 01:22:59,619 - So there's nothing else I can do? - I'm sorry, pal. It's over. 1197 01:22:59,790 --> 01:23:02,079 You're in real danger. 1198 01:23:02,251 --> 01:23:05,003 Get yourself out of there as soon as you can. 1199 01:23:14,305 --> 01:23:16,546 [giggling] 1200 01:23:24,898 --> 01:23:27,436 [gasps] 1201 01:23:32,906 --> 01:23:34,614 Bullard. 1202 01:23:35,992 --> 01:23:37,819 Tell the warden I'll take his deal. 1203 01:23:39,371 --> 01:23:40,948 I want out of here. 1204 01:23:44,709 --> 01:23:48,577 - [salsa music plays] - [shouting] 1205 01:23:48,755 --> 01:23:52,420 Hey, Stan. The Nazis were saying the Virgin Mary tortilla's a fake. 1206 01:23:52,592 --> 01:23:55,593 - That's not cool, homes. - Hey, the Nazis were saying 1207 01:23:55,762 --> 01:23:57,422 the Virgin Mary has no power. 1208 01:23:57,597 --> 01:24:00,717 Constantine was pacifying the Byzantine priest by giving him 1209 01:24:00,892 --> 01:24:04,592 a goddess to pray to. They've been watching the History Channel. 1210 01:24:04,771 --> 01:24:08,056 - What? - What are you gonna do about it? 1211 01:24:08,232 --> 01:24:10,984 I'm not gonna do anything about it. 1212 01:24:13,404 --> 01:24:14,732 What's up with him, man? 1213 01:24:14,905 --> 01:24:17,906 Hey, Stan. Stan! 1214 01:24:18,492 --> 01:24:22,027 The Brazilians won't stop calling Farib an Arab. 1215 01:24:22,204 --> 01:24:25,075 I'm not an Arab! I'm Persian. 1216 01:24:25,249 --> 01:24:28,452 What do I care? You look like an Arab. 1217 01:24:29,503 --> 01:24:32,255 Hey, listen up! All of you! 1218 01:24:33,841 --> 01:24:36,877 You're all on your own! You hear me? 1219 01:24:37,052 --> 01:24:39,543 I don't care what any of you do to each other! 1220 01:24:39,721 --> 01:24:42,295 Hey, you guys! 1221 01:24:43,767 --> 01:24:45,392 An interracial book club. 1222 01:24:47,396 --> 01:24:50,599 You guys all hate each other. So stop pretending you don't. 1223 01:24:50,774 --> 01:24:54,439 - You don't know about Macbeth. - Fuck you, motherfucker! 1224 01:24:54,611 --> 01:24:56,817 [shouting] 1225 01:25:17,050 --> 01:25:20,419 Yeah, that's more like it. Yes, sir. 1226 01:25:37,987 --> 01:25:39,398 Big Stan? 1227 01:25:41,907 --> 01:25:43,449 We need to talk. 1228 01:26:00,425 --> 01:26:02,133 I thought you cared about us. 1229 01:26:04,471 --> 01:26:05,846 Well, I don't. 1230 01:26:13,355 --> 01:26:15,893 [Patterson] Hey, little cracker. 1231 01:26:17,442 --> 01:26:21,226 Why don't you sit over here, my little white brother. 1232 01:26:35,460 --> 01:26:37,251 Here, have mine. 1233 01:26:38,254 --> 01:26:40,460 I'm gonna need to shave your head. 1234 01:26:40,631 --> 01:26:44,296 Put a couple little tattoos on your forehead, huh? 1235 01:26:45,303 --> 01:26:46,713 Come on, eat up. 1236 01:26:50,600 --> 01:26:52,888 I was wrong about you. 1237 01:26:53,060 --> 01:26:54,969 We all were. 1238 01:26:56,647 --> 01:27:00,063 Stay out of the yard tomorrow. You hear me? 1239 01:27:06,782 --> 01:27:10,614 D-block houses some of our most hardened offenders. 1240 01:27:10,786 --> 01:27:15,412 But here, we have Oaksburg's greatest rehabilitation story. 1241 01:27:15,582 --> 01:27:20,244 Stan Minton. Stan, I'd like for you to meet the board of governors. 1242 01:27:21,630 --> 01:27:24,251 Not going in the yard today, Stan? 1243 01:27:24,424 --> 01:27:27,710 - I don't feel well, warden. - Maybe this will make you feel better. 1244 01:27:27,886 --> 01:27:31,800 Due to Stan's exemplary behaviour, the parole board has agreed 1245 01:27:31,973 --> 01:27:34,381 to meet with him today. 1246 01:27:35,143 --> 01:27:37,716 Well, we better be moving along. 1247 01:27:43,193 --> 01:27:46,277 The shit goes down at 12.30. 1248 01:27:46,446 --> 01:27:50,823 At 12.35, I'm in the real estate business. 1249 01:28:00,460 --> 01:28:04,125 [muted dialogue] 1250 01:28:16,642 --> 01:28:19,133 [laughter] 1251 01:28:23,816 --> 01:28:25,974 Stan! Honey! 1252 01:28:29,446 --> 01:28:31,403 - I'll deal with you in a minute. - Everything OK? 1253 01:28:31,573 --> 01:28:33,068 Both of you. 1254 01:28:37,454 --> 01:28:40,408 [woman] Next up is prisoner 5824. 1255 01:28:41,124 --> 01:28:43,876 In the matter of Stanley Minton. You have your files. 1256 01:28:47,547 --> 01:28:51,497 [woman] In his time here, Minton has accrued an exemplary record. 1257 01:28:51,676 --> 01:28:55,176 And let it be noted, he's a first-time non-violent offender. 1258 01:28:59,100 --> 01:29:01,009 [ticking] 1259 01:29:01,186 --> 01:29:03,593 Hold up! 1260 01:29:03,772 --> 01:29:07,022 Before we vote, Mr. Minton, is there anything you'd like to add? 1261 01:29:07,192 --> 01:29:10,442 I'd just like to say, um... [clears throat] 1262 01:29:10,612 --> 01:29:12,734 ...I've really learned a lot. 1263 01:29:12,905 --> 01:29:15,361 And I'm ready to get back to work. 1264 01:29:17,035 --> 01:29:19,193 [woman] Good, we like to hear that. 1265 01:29:20,538 --> 01:29:23,788 Here's the yard where the prisoners come to exercise. 1266 01:29:23,958 --> 01:29:27,541 That's where Charlie the Fly tried to fly over the wall. [laughs] 1267 01:29:27,712 --> 01:29:30,997 Well, in light of Warden Gasque's recommendation, 1268 01:29:31,173 --> 01:29:34,673 I think we have a pretty clear-cut case for parole. 1269 01:29:37,263 --> 01:29:39,551 Mr. Minton? 1270 01:29:42,059 --> 01:29:45,309 How would you feel about getting out of here today? 1271 01:29:49,608 --> 01:29:51,268 Mr. Minton? 1272 01:29:55,447 --> 01:29:57,190 Did I mention I'm in real estate? 1273 01:29:58,408 --> 01:30:01,991 [laughs] I got my eye on some property real close by here 1274 01:30:02,162 --> 01:30:06,373 - I can't wait to develop. - Hm. That's commendable. 1275 01:30:06,541 --> 01:30:10,159 You know, while I was in here, also, I joined a biker gang. 1276 01:30:10,337 --> 01:30:13,172 Satan's Paedophiles. 1277 01:30:13,340 --> 01:30:15,416 Anyway, they said when I get out, 1278 01:30:15,592 --> 01:30:18,546 they'd love to camp next to the grammar school near here. 1279 01:30:18,720 --> 01:30:20,131 I hope that's not a problem. 1280 01:30:20,305 --> 01:30:24,801 They're pretty cool guys, except when they drink and do crystal meth. 1281 01:30:24,976 --> 01:30:26,554 Which is almost every weekend. 1282 01:30:26,728 --> 01:30:31,520 But most of the people I sell to, they don't need to know about that. 1283 01:30:31,691 --> 01:30:35,819 'Cause, uh, they're old ladies, mostly. Not too good with fine print, 1284 01:30:35,987 --> 01:30:37,101 if you get my drift. 1285 01:30:38,781 --> 01:30:42,530 Tell me, is your grandma still alive? I bet I could make her a sweet deal. 1286 01:30:42,702 --> 01:30:44,778 By the time I'm through with her, 1287 01:30:44,954 --> 01:30:49,746 she'll give hand jobs behind the pharmacy to pay for arthritis medication. 1288 01:30:51,544 --> 01:30:54,580 Two at a time, you know? Stuff you see in pornos. 1289 01:30:56,715 --> 01:31:00,760 Anyway, that's a nice top you have on. Seriously. 1290 01:31:00,928 --> 01:31:03,633 Mind lowering it? I'd love to see some boobage. 1291 01:31:04,848 --> 01:31:07,849 Let me see that, woman. That's sexy. Let me see that. 1292 01:31:08,018 --> 01:31:11,304 Let me touch one of them. Let me touch one of them. Can I? Please? 1293 01:31:11,480 --> 01:31:14,101 Parole denied! Take him back to his cell! 1294 01:31:14,274 --> 01:31:18,106 What colour are your nipples? I bet they're pink! Light brown? 1295 01:31:18,278 --> 01:31:19,772 Dollar size or quarter? 1296 01:31:22,449 --> 01:31:24,821 Stan, did we win? 1297 01:31:24,993 --> 01:31:26,820 Let go of me. I'm in a hurry. 1298 01:31:26,995 --> 01:31:28,370 Have no fear, Stanley. 1299 01:31:28,538 --> 01:31:32,239 I will continue to take care of your wife while you're gone. 1300 01:31:32,417 --> 01:31:35,038 - Thanks a lot, pal. - No thanks needed. 1301 01:31:35,211 --> 01:31:37,998 I cherish Mindy's company. 1302 01:31:38,173 --> 01:31:42,087 Since my addiction to cigarettes made me impotent, 1303 01:31:42,260 --> 01:31:45,296 I've had very little contact with the fair sex. 1304 01:31:46,264 --> 01:31:47,675 Impotent? 1305 01:31:47,849 --> 01:31:50,091 I used to think smoking was cool, 1306 01:31:50,268 --> 01:31:56,021 but a limp dick spells nerd in any language. 1307 01:31:56,190 --> 01:31:59,227 - You're impotent. That's great! - Not really. 1308 01:32:00,111 --> 01:32:02,684 Baby, I love you. I'll write to you as soon as I can. 1309 01:32:02,863 --> 01:32:04,655 OK. 1310 01:32:06,117 --> 01:32:07,694 [Mindy screams] 1311 01:32:07,868 --> 01:32:09,991 That's my boy. 1312 01:32:10,663 --> 01:32:12,121 Love you, baby! 1313 01:32:13,499 --> 01:32:16,204 - He's running! - Code red! 1314 01:32:16,377 --> 01:32:18,749 Watch the prisoners file in. 1315 01:32:21,340 --> 01:32:22,834 [phone rings] 1316 01:32:53,913 --> 01:32:55,787 The Master has taught you well. 1317 01:32:55,957 --> 01:32:59,492 Don't tell me. You studied with The Master too? 1318 01:32:59,669 --> 01:33:04,378 - I am his number one. - [scoffs] I didn't see that coming. 1319 01:33:04,549 --> 01:33:07,503 There are many things you will not see coming. 1320 01:33:07,677 --> 01:33:10,250 Oh, really? Like what? 1321 01:33:19,772 --> 01:33:20,851 Hmm. 1322 01:33:21,023 --> 01:33:22,517 [grunts] 1323 01:33:24,985 --> 01:33:29,861 - Whoa. Take it easy. - I have been taking it easy. 1324 01:33:30,032 --> 01:33:31,657 [both grunting] 1325 01:33:38,248 --> 01:33:40,822 [man] I wanna break me off some chocolate. 1326 01:33:41,001 --> 01:33:42,875 [man 2] Come on, hold the line. 1327 01:33:44,797 --> 01:33:47,632 - Top you up here? - Thank you very much. 1328 01:33:48,467 --> 01:33:50,625 - How are you doing? - [indistinct chatter] 1329 01:33:50,802 --> 01:33:51,834 Yeah, good. 1330 01:34:07,193 --> 01:34:11,820 I don't think The Master prepares you for this. 1331 01:34:16,911 --> 01:34:19,402 Here comes the eagle. 1332 01:34:28,548 --> 01:34:30,208 [screaming] 1333 01:34:33,094 --> 01:34:35,881 [indistinct chatter, laughter] 1334 01:34:36,055 --> 01:34:38,593 [grunting] 1335 01:34:45,689 --> 01:34:48,856 [all shouting] 1336 01:34:51,070 --> 01:34:52,813 Are those weapons? 1337 01:35:00,746 --> 01:35:02,537 Hoo, hoo, hoo! 1338 01:35:03,707 --> 01:35:05,415 Ah! 1339 01:35:07,211 --> 01:35:09,203 [groaning] 1340 01:35:09,379 --> 01:35:12,250 Somebody didn't strengthen their titties. 1341 01:35:14,926 --> 01:35:16,337 Whoo! 1342 01:35:20,307 --> 01:35:22,798 [shouting] 1343 01:35:22,976 --> 01:35:24,554 It looks like a riot. 1344 01:35:29,441 --> 01:35:32,441 - [panting] - [grunting] 1345 01:35:45,581 --> 01:35:47,574 [shouting] 1346 01:35:47,750 --> 01:35:49,577 Whoo! 1347 01:35:53,047 --> 01:35:55,503 - I celebrated too early! - Ah! 1348 01:36:08,020 --> 01:36:10,855 Warden, can't you do anything to stop this? 1349 01:36:11,023 --> 01:36:15,186 - Bullard, prepare to fire. - [cocks gun] 1350 01:36:37,674 --> 01:36:40,343 [shouting] 1351 01:36:46,433 --> 01:36:47,891 Whoo! 1352 01:36:48,059 --> 01:36:50,764 Whoo! Whoo! 1353 01:36:54,190 --> 01:36:55,471 Whoo! 1354 01:36:56,359 --> 01:36:57,937 Finger of death. 1355 01:37:00,947 --> 01:37:02,738 [sniffs] 1356 01:37:05,159 --> 01:37:06,570 That's you. 1357 01:37:08,079 --> 01:37:09,739 [high-pitched warbling] 1358 01:37:12,625 --> 01:37:15,875 I don't know if The Master prepared you for this. 1359 01:37:22,218 --> 01:37:23,961 Hoo! 1360 01:37:28,432 --> 01:37:29,381 [all shouting] 1361 01:37:29,558 --> 01:37:33,141 - Ready to dance, motherfuckers? - Handle your shit, bitch! 1362 01:37:33,312 --> 01:37:34,510 Fire at will. 1363 01:37:36,398 --> 01:37:37,561 Don't fight! 1364 01:37:42,696 --> 01:37:45,448 [salsa music plays] 1365 01:38:25,113 --> 01:38:26,772 [laughing] 1366 01:38:30,076 --> 01:38:31,451 Why aren't you firing? 1367 01:38:39,585 --> 01:38:42,705 - Fire that weapon. - I can't do it, boss. 1368 01:38:45,257 --> 01:38:47,416 Well, why the hell not? 1369 01:38:47,593 --> 01:38:50,084 They're just dancing. 1370 01:38:59,479 --> 01:39:01,472 Give me that rifle. 1371 01:39:07,112 --> 01:39:08,736 What the hell are you doing? 1372 01:39:09,865 --> 01:39:11,359 [Gasque] Restoring order. 1373 01:39:12,534 --> 01:39:15,072 They've clearly lost their minds. 1374 01:39:15,245 --> 01:39:17,072 Warden, it's over. 1375 01:39:19,457 --> 01:39:21,082 Look at all these witnesses. 1376 01:39:21,251 --> 01:39:23,623 It's over, warden. 1377 01:39:27,924 --> 01:39:29,751 You did this to me. 1378 01:39:47,401 --> 01:39:50,402 - Where did that come from? - What do you think I've been doing 1379 01:39:50,571 --> 01:39:52,813 with The Master for the last six months? 1380 01:39:52,990 --> 01:39:54,947 [sighs] Thank God. 1381 01:39:55,117 --> 01:39:56,861 You did good with Dang. 1382 01:39:57,036 --> 01:39:59,823 But you're still my number two student. 1383 01:39:59,997 --> 01:40:03,615 - Number two? - She'll kick your ass. 1384 01:40:06,128 --> 01:40:08,168 I might like that. 1385 01:40:09,798 --> 01:40:12,124 Ready position! 1386 01:40:12,301 --> 01:40:14,293 Focus! 1387 01:40:14,470 --> 01:40:16,213 Lock! Punch! 1388 01:40:16,388 --> 01:40:18,760 - Kick! Double punch! - [all] Yah! 1389 01:40:18,932 --> 01:40:21,684 Ready position! 1390 01:40:21,852 --> 01:40:23,809 Lock! Punch! 1391 01:40:23,979 --> 01:40:26,766 - Kick! Double punch! - [all] Yah! 1392 01:40:26,940 --> 01:40:29,609 - It's time, Minton. - Just a minute, warden. 1393 01:40:29,776 --> 01:40:32,528 Looks great, guys. Thanks, Robbie. 1394 01:40:32,696 --> 01:40:35,862 OK, everybody, I gotta go now. 1395 01:40:36,032 --> 01:40:39,947 - [all groaning] - I'll miss you too. 1396 01:40:40,120 --> 01:40:43,654 I want you guys to be especially nice to our newest inmate 1397 01:40:43,832 --> 01:40:47,366 and best disbarred lawyer in the world, Lew Popper. 1398 01:40:47,544 --> 01:40:50,379 - Welcome aboard! - Lew! 1399 01:40:50,547 --> 01:40:54,876 - Is the ban on rape still in effect? - I'm pretty sure. 1400 01:40:55,051 --> 01:40:57,340 - [chuckles] - [Shorts] Hey! 1401 01:40:57,512 --> 01:41:02,055 Permission to give Big Stan a group hug. 1402 01:41:02,225 --> 01:41:04,217 - Permission granted. - Come on, gang! 1403 01:41:04,393 --> 01:41:07,228 [all shouting] 1404 01:41:12,318 --> 01:41:16,150 Hey, little homey, thanks for giving me my teeth back. 1405 01:41:16,322 --> 01:41:19,738 - My pleasure. - [speaks Spanish] 1406 01:41:19,909 --> 01:41:21,617 [speaks Spanish] 1407 01:41:24,538 --> 01:41:27,243 - Where you going, cracker? - I'm going home, man. 1408 01:41:27,416 --> 01:41:31,283 - I think Big Stan is staying here. - Oh, yeah? 1409 01:41:34,423 --> 01:41:35,537 Oh, shit! 1410 01:41:35,716 --> 01:41:38,385 [♪ Los Niños de Sara: Vagabundo] 1411 01:41:38,552 --> 01:41:41,257 [Patterson] I'm Big Stan. No more rape. [laughs] 1412 01:41:41,430 --> 01:41:43,256 Aw, very creepy. 1413 01:41:44,558 --> 01:41:45,637 My cracker. 1414 01:41:47,018 --> 01:41:48,299 Be good, huh? 1415 01:41:49,855 --> 01:41:52,013 Bye, Stan! 1416 01:41:52,816 --> 01:41:54,855 [Big Raymond] Hey. Hey. 1417 01:41:57,988 --> 01:41:59,019 Whoo! 1418 01:41:59,197 --> 01:42:02,732 - Big man. - Bye, Big Stan. 1419 01:42:02,909 --> 01:42:04,487 Say bye. 1420 01:42:10,667 --> 01:42:11,746 Stan! 1421 01:42:14,295 --> 01:42:16,667 Sweetie. 1422 01:42:16,839 --> 01:42:18,796 Hey, handsome. 1423 01:42:18,966 --> 01:42:21,173 - Where's Mindy Junior? - In the car. 1424 01:42:21,344 --> 01:42:24,428 - She's being kind of a brat. - Isn't the nanny helping? 1425 01:42:24,597 --> 01:42:27,302 Yeah. I think he still sneaks cigarettes. 1426 01:42:27,475 --> 01:42:30,179 Yeah? I'll talk to him. 1427 01:42:31,437 --> 01:42:33,097 [coughing] 1428 01:42:35,733 --> 01:42:38,484 Hi, precious. Hi, The Master. 1429 01:42:38,652 --> 01:42:41,274 - Say hello to your father, child. - Hi. 1430 01:42:41,447 --> 01:42:44,816 - Rumour is you're sneaking smokes. - Shh. 1431 01:42:45,659 --> 01:42:49,194 - How's her technique? - She stinks. 1432 01:42:49,371 --> 01:42:51,115 But so did you at first. 1433 01:42:51,290 --> 01:42:54,160 You sure? I don't remember that. 1434 01:42:54,334 --> 01:42:56,208 - [Mindy] Stan! - OK, baby. 1435 01:42:56,378 --> 01:42:58,252 [Mindy] Let's go, sweetie! 1436 01:43:03,802 --> 01:43:06,174 [Mindy] Whoo-hoo! 108772