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1
00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:17,680
Don't touch your face.
2
00:00:18,400 --> 00:00:20,560
It feels like a piece of ham.
3
00:00:20,640 --> 00:00:23,440
Okay, I have got
room temperature soup,
4
00:00:23,520 --> 00:00:26,840
some ice cream,
and a little smoothie but no straw
5
00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:28,880
because I've done some reading
on dry socket
6
00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:31,640
and it's really fucked up and
there's no way my girl's getting it.
7
00:00:32,240 --> 00:00:33,800
You're the one for me.
8
00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:35,120
Do you reckon?
9
00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:37,640
Like, how often does this shit happen?
10
00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:41,040
It's cosmic shit, like,
I didn't even know you,
11
00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:45,120
boom, I love you and we've got a dog.
12
00:00:45,200 --> 00:00:47,680
- I know, I know.
- I always wanted a dog.
13
00:00:47,760 --> 00:00:49,120
It's amazing, isn't it?
14
00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:51,000
- He's so great.
- Yeah.
15
00:00:52,040 --> 00:00:53,320
Not Mum, I don't want her.
16
00:00:53,400 --> 00:00:55,040
- Meggles?
- Meggles, yeah.
17
00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:57,600
- Hey! It's my best girl.
18
00:00:57,600 --> 00:01:00,000
- "It's my best girl"?
Oh, look at you.
19
00:01:00,000 --> 00:01:00,200
- "It's my best girl"?
Oh, look at you.
20
00:01:00,280 --> 00:01:04,239
A man stole my wisdom teeth
and I paid him for it.
21
00:01:04,320 --> 00:01:07,120
I hope you're not
too high for this,
22
00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:09,400
but, um, I want to ask you something.
23
00:01:09,480 --> 00:01:10,880
Oh, shit.
24
00:01:10,960 --> 00:01:13,200
Ashley Marie Molden,
25
00:01:13,280 --> 00:01:16,080
will you be my maid of honour?
26
00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:18,560
You got engaged!
27
00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:20,200
Rumi asked me last night
28
00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:22,080
after we saw
her friend's one-woman show.
29
00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:23,640
Oh, sounds awful.
30
00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:26,840
Hey, hey, Meggles, congratulations,
that's huge.
31
00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:29,560
- This is Gordon.
- Thank you, Gordy.
32
00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:32,000
I mean, obviously,
you don't like her, but...
33
00:01:32,080 --> 00:01:35,320
Hey, hey, come on, I like her.
If you like her, I like her.
34
00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:37,040
- God, you've got good hair.
- There you go.
35
00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:39,320
Well, I love her, so it's happening.
36
00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:42,120
Whoa, speedy Susans.
37
00:01:42,200 --> 00:01:44,720
Well, that brings me
to my next question.
38
00:01:44,800 --> 00:01:49,240
Um, will you be my maid of honour
this weekend?
39
00:01:49,320 --> 00:01:51,840
- What?
- Rumi's parents own a restaurant,
40
00:01:51,920 --> 00:01:55,680
so we thought, fuck it,
pop-up wedding, let's go.
41
00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:58,120
But my big face.
42
00:01:58,200 --> 00:02:00,000
It's five days away,
you'll be fine.
43
00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:00,080
It's five days away,
you'll be fine.
44
00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:02,720
No, Meggles, I'm not going to be fine.
45
00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:06,400
Okay, hopefully, when you come down,
you'll just be happy for us.
46
00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:09,039
- Huh?
- Okay, I'll talk to you later. Bye.
47
00:02:10,520 --> 00:02:12,000
- She's gone.
- Oh.
48
00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:12,800
- She's mad at me.
49
00:02:12,880 --> 00:02:14,440
- Oh, well,
she'll be all right.
50
00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:17,000
- Who's getting married?
- Not sure.
51
00:02:17,080 --> 00:02:18,560
You can touch your face, eh?
52
00:02:18,640 --> 00:02:20,800
Yeah, I can touch my...
You can touch my face.
53
00:02:21,760 --> 00:02:22,880
- Gentle.
- Yeah.
54
00:02:23,920 --> 00:02:24,840
- Oh.
- Don't touch... I know
55
00:02:24,920 --> 00:02:26,520
you want to touch it,
but you can't touch it.
56
00:02:26,600 --> 00:02:27,880
- I ain't touching it.
- Don't touch it.
57
00:02:27,960 --> 00:02:29,760
- Touch your face. Touch your face.
- Touch his... Yeah.
58
00:02:29,840 --> 00:02:30,760
- Now this one.
- Don't touch it!
59
00:02:30,840 --> 00:02:32,280
- All right.
60
00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:59,960
Nuptu-ale was a stroke
of genius on Brett's behalf.
61
00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:02,960
Although, maybe leave the,
um, graphic design to me,
62
00:03:03,040 --> 00:03:05,240
because it's a little bit scissory.
63
00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:07,440
Okay, this is looking good.
I think our bar's going to slap.
64
00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:09,640
And, Bretty, you came up
on my Tinder this morning.
65
00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:11,280
And I love you,
but your profile's dog shit.
66
00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:12,800
Oh. What are you talking about?
67
00:03:12,880 --> 00:03:14,520
You have Year 12 rugby photos on there
68
00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:16,640
and one with sunglasses
on the back of your head.
69
00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:17,840
Actually, give it to me.
70
00:03:18,640 --> 00:03:20,480
Why is Colin in all your photos?
71
00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:22,240
Oh, chicks love wheelchair dogs.
72
00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:23,440
Use what you've got, Brett.
73
00:03:23,840 --> 00:03:26,120
- I'm homeless.
- No, you're not. You're a seafarer.
74
00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:28,320
- Talk about water views.
- Just say
75
00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:30,760
that you're chief executive officer
of a microbrewery.
76
00:03:30,840 --> 00:03:32,120
- For real?
- But that's you.
77
00:03:32,720 --> 00:03:35,760
Just say you're chief operations
officer of a microbrewery.
78
00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:37,320
- Sweet!
- But I am. That's what I am.
79
00:03:37,400 --> 00:03:38,440
- Are you?
- Yes.
80
00:03:38,520 --> 00:03:40,560
Okay, you're chief fucking...
81
00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:43,080
- executive brewer.
- Am I, though?
82
00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:44,160
Of course you are, mate!
83
00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:46,360
Yeah, we're firing on
all cylinders again.
84
00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:48,440
Daddy's taking care of all his babies.
85
00:03:48,520 --> 00:03:50,200
- Thanks, Daddy.
- Okay, stop saying "daddy".
86
00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:51,840
- I am your daddy!
- I'm your daddy.
87
00:03:51,920 --> 00:03:53,160
- Okay, just a wee...
88
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:54,160
heart starter, I think.
89
00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:56,280
Now, don't forget you're working,
Crappster.
90
00:03:56,360 --> 00:03:58,040
No, you're working, Crappster.
91
00:03:58,120 --> 00:03:59,640
I'm basically in the bridal party.
92
00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:00,000
Hey, listen, could you two
do me a favour today
93
00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:01,640
Hey, listen, could you two
do me a favour today
94
00:04:01,720 --> 00:04:04,320
and just make a bit of a big show
of how pretty Ash is?
95
00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:05,720
She's always pretty.
96
00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:08,040
- Yeah, beautiful girl.
- Yeah, good, good. Say that.
97
00:04:09,440 --> 00:04:10,520
How do I look?
98
00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:12,840
You look... good.
99
00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:14,160
You look good.
100
00:04:14,240 --> 00:04:15,600
- Is the tan too much?
- Nup.
101
00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:18,800
Yeah, because I said two-hour regular
but she sold me on the two-hour dark
102
00:04:18,880 --> 00:04:21,040
because there's probably going
to be flash photography.
103
00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:22,480
Why did you get a tan, though?
104
00:04:23,080 --> 00:04:25,400
Just because my face was all puffy
from the wizzys,
105
00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:27,760
so then I cut my own fringe,
106
00:04:27,840 --> 00:04:29,760
thinking that it would give my face
a bit more structure,
107
00:04:29,840 --> 00:04:32,520
but it made me look fat, so then
I got the spray tan to look skinny.
108
00:04:32,600 --> 00:04:34,720
But is it too much?
She said it would still look natural.
109
00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,160
- It does.
- Yeah, cool.
110
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:38,960
Yeah, but, like, we can't have
three brides today, so I just,
111
00:04:39,040 --> 00:04:40,800
I need you to chill out, okay?
112
00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:45,080
Oh, totally. I'm just trying
to look good for you.
113
00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:48,040
Oh, I feel sick.
114
00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:50,040
Hey, hey, listen to me.
115
00:04:50,120 --> 00:04:52,080
Meggles, you know,
you don't have to do this
116
00:04:52,160 --> 00:04:54,800
because we can just say that you've
got a stomach bug or something,
117
00:04:54,880 --> 00:04:56,400
and I can get you out of here,
118
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:58,280
get a hotel room in the city
on Mum's points,
119
00:04:58,360 --> 00:05:00,000
and we can just wait it out
until this whole thing blows over.
120
00:05:00,000 --> 00:05:01,320
and we can just wait it out
until this whole thing blows over.
121
00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:03,600
No, I want to get married.
122
00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:06,280
Good! See? That was a test.
123
00:05:06,360 --> 00:05:07,440
Look, I know
you don't like her.
124
00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:08,840
Oh, I like her.
125
00:05:08,920 --> 00:05:09,920
- Ash.
- Yeah?
126
00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:11,280
- Come on.
- No!
127
00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:13,600
I don't know what you mean, dog.
She's, hmm...
128
00:05:14,840 --> 00:05:16,440
- I know she's a lot.
- Mm.
129
00:05:16,520 --> 00:05:17,800
But when I'm with her...
130
00:05:18,840 --> 00:05:19,840
I feel like me.
131
00:05:20,680 --> 00:05:23,160
And I've been looking for that
for a while.
132
00:05:24,160 --> 00:05:25,480
And you know what that's like.
133
00:05:26,760 --> 00:05:28,160
- With Gordy?
- Yeah.
134
00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:32,920
Yeah. But I'm not marrying him
today.
135
00:05:33,520 --> 00:05:35,720
- What... Would you ever?
- Well, maybe.
136
00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:38,320
Have to be a pretty killer proposal.
137
00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:42,160
- Wow, you just got really basic.
- I know. I felt that.
138
00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:44,880
- I really am basic.
- Yeah, look at you.
139
00:05:44,960 --> 00:05:47,280
- Darling, could...
- Hi, Dad!
140
00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:50,600
Oh! My little girl. Look at you.
141
00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:56,920
- Mum would have been so proud.
- Oh, I think so too.
142
00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:59,400
She would have been
backing you all the way.
143
00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:00,000
Oh my God. She would have loved it.
144
00:06:00,000 --> 00:06:01,960
Oh my God. She would have loved it.
145
00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:03,360
Ooh! Hello?
146
00:06:03,440 --> 00:06:04,520
- Oh.
147
00:06:04,600 --> 00:06:05,840
Hi, Bernie.
148
00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:08,160
Hello... you?
149
00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:09,880
It's Ash.
150
00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:13,280
Of course it is! Sorry, Ash.
151
00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:15,120
I like your, um...
152
00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:18,200
Megs, I'm ravenous.
What's there to eat?
153
00:06:18,280 --> 00:06:20,120
Oh, sorry. Food's not here till three.
154
00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:21,400
Three.
155
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:23,880
- What are you eating, Ash?
- Nothing.
156
00:06:26,000 --> 00:06:27,680
Oh, I do beg your pardon. Um...
157
00:06:28,280 --> 00:06:29,280
I'll... go get...
158
00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:32,920
- Does it look like I'm eating?
159
00:06:39,560 --> 00:06:41,960
- To life. To love.
160
00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:45,360
- Uh-oh. Don't leave that up here.
- So sorry to interrupt.
161
00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:48,240
I'm just looking for a... a spot
to put these. Just be a sec.
162
00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,520
- Hi, Rumi.
- Hi.
163
00:06:56,400 --> 00:06:58,000
Do you have a sec? Could I grab you?
164
00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:11,600
What can I do for you, good sire?
165
00:07:12,440 --> 00:07:14,360
Thanks for asking,
my liege.
166
00:07:14,440 --> 00:07:16,040
No, seriously, I wanted to just
167
00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:18,880
apologize in person
for dinner the other night,
168
00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:21,160
and I wanted to also thank you
for trusting us
169
00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:22,720
with your alcohol service today,
170
00:07:22,800 --> 00:07:25,200
and we just want you
to have a very special day.
171
00:07:25,280 --> 00:07:27,040
Sounds like it was written by AI.
172
00:07:27,120 --> 00:07:28,520
It wasn't.
173
00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:30,280
- Did Ash tell you to say that?
- She did.
174
00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:32,400
- Yeah.
- Yep, yep, yep.
175
00:07:32,480 --> 00:07:33,640
Do you need a hand with that?
176
00:07:35,840 --> 00:07:36,720
- Okay, mate. It's just
177
00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:38,200
they're hard to do,
and I know how to do it. That's all.
178
00:07:38,280 --> 00:07:41,240
Oh, I know.
I've just been sitting here.
179
00:07:41,320 --> 00:07:43,440
I don't know how to do it.
I'm so helpless.
180
00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:44,760
Thank heaven you came in.
181
00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:46,560
Okay, mate. Nice hat, by the way.
182
00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:47,520
You can go now.
183
00:07:47,600 --> 00:07:48,880
- Fuck me.
- I will not.
184
00:07:49,840 --> 00:07:51,320
- There you are.
- Hey, yes, I am!
185
00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:53,840
And I'm just leaving
this particular room, though.
186
00:07:57,000 --> 00:07:58,560
- Hello!
- Hi.
187
00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:00,000
Oh, um, crew, this is
M's maid of honour, Ash.
188
00:08:00,000 --> 00:08:02,600
Oh, um, crew, this is
M's maid of honour, Ash.
189
00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:06,360
Who's M? Oh, M.
Yeah, that's cute.
190
00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:07,760
Yeah, it's me. I'm the maid of honour.
191
00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:10,120
I had my wisdom teeth out.
Probably can't tell.
192
00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:14,680
Oh, yeah, a bit old-fashioned,
but, yeah, nice. Nice tradition.
193
00:08:14,760 --> 00:08:16,680
It's nice to be asked, but, yeah.
194
00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:19,320
Not a maid. Wink, wink.
195
00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:21,280
I'm Rumi's maid of honour, Hayley.
196
00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:24,280
- Oh, really?
- What?
197
00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:27,000
I... I just thought, um,
198
00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:30,280
well, there's only one
maid of honour, normally,
199
00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:32,400
and I thought that that was me.
200
00:08:32,480 --> 00:08:33,440
Normally?
201
00:08:33,520 --> 00:08:34,799
Well, originally.
202
00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:36,039
Right.
203
00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:37,760
Well, I mean, if you prefer,
you could be,
204
00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:38,919
you know, person of honour.
205
00:08:39,400 --> 00:08:41,200
No, I want to be
Rumi's maid of honour.
206
00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:43,560
It's just that
I'm the maid of honour.
207
00:08:43,640 --> 00:08:44,880
Sorry, I'm the maid of honour.
208
00:08:44,960 --> 00:08:48,720
I'm... I'm wearing the dress,
so I guess I'm the maid.
209
00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:50,280
Well, you just said
you weren't a maid.
210
00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:53,440
Yeah, as a joke,
because I'm not a virgin, you know?
211
00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:54,520
Are you a virgin?
212
00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:55,560
None of your business.
213
00:08:55,640 --> 00:08:57,360
No, it's none of my business.
214
00:08:57,440 --> 00:09:00,000
Ah! Guests arrive in 20 minutes.
215
00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:00,200
Ah! Guests arrive in 20 minutes.
216
00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:02,160
The ceremony starts
at 4:00 p.m. sharp.
217
00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:05,840
Please use the #suddenlycashmere,
and #bouquetsandbuttonholes
218
00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:08,560
can be picked up from me at 3:45,
because I am the maid of honour.
219
00:09:08,640 --> 00:09:09,640
Okay.
220
00:09:12,040 --> 00:09:13,640
Look, I actually do
need help with this.
221
00:09:15,360 --> 00:09:16,920
- Hi.
- Hi, welcome.
222
00:09:17,000 --> 00:09:18,760
- Uh, Beer, Echo Park Brewery.
- Thank you.
223
00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:19,760
- Champagne's fine too.
- Thanks.
224
00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:23,200
Echo Park Brewery. Like us on
Facebook, TikTok, and Instagram.
225
00:09:23,280 --> 00:09:24,480
Echo Park Beer?
226
00:09:24,560 --> 00:09:26,880
Yeah, please help yourself.
Artisanally crafted for the event.
227
00:09:26,960 --> 00:09:28,640
- What's he doing here?
- Who?
228
00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:29,600
It's Lee.
229
00:09:29,680 --> 00:09:32,120
- Oh my God! Thank you.
- It's so awkward.
230
00:09:32,200 --> 00:09:34,000
I told Mum not to bring him.
231
00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:35,000
- I'm sorry. Oh,
Gordon, Gordon, Gordon!
232
00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:35,880
- Um.
233
00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:38,640
- Hey, hey.
- Um, you have to kick Lee out.
234
00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:40,120
Oh! What?
235
00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:41,200
No, why?
236
00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:44,200
Because... because Meggles and Rumi
don't want him here.
237
00:09:44,280 --> 00:09:45,440
- Okay.
- You know, he makes
238
00:09:45,520 --> 00:09:46,920
- people uncomfortable.
- Yeah.
239
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:48,520
- Not the right vibe.
240
00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:49,960
- Mm-mm!
- Okay, yep, got it.
241
00:09:50,040 --> 00:09:51,360
- Yep, yep.
- Okay, Trish.
242
00:09:51,440 --> 00:09:52,880
- Well, I'll see you
on the dance floor.
243
00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:54,000
- See you there.
244
00:09:55,040 --> 00:09:57,840
My God! She's had some bad work done.
245
00:09:57,920 --> 00:10:00,000
- Hey, guys. Hey.
- Oh, Gordon.
246
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:00,360
- Hey, guys. Hey.
- Oh, Gordon.
247
00:10:00,440 --> 00:10:03,240
- Oh! My boy.
- Oh, hey! Hey, Lynelle, how are you?
248
00:10:03,320 --> 00:10:06,680
Isn't this wonderful?
What a marvellous day to celebrate
249
00:10:06,760 --> 00:10:09,040
the love between
two beautiful young women.
250
00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:12,440
Yeah, yeah, yeah, about that.
This is, I'm afraid,
251
00:10:12,520 --> 00:10:14,520
it's a pop-up wedding,
so for that reason,
252
00:10:14,600 --> 00:10:16,720
there are no plus ones. I'm so sorry.
253
00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:18,480
What about Joni and Walter?
254
00:10:18,560 --> 00:10:19,840
I... I don't know who they are,
255
00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:22,600
but, yeah, there's set meals
is the thing, so, yeah.
256
00:10:22,680 --> 00:10:24,720
Oh, well, Lee won't eat much.
257
00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:26,360
- I'm fasting.
- Oh, really?
258
00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:27,520
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, that's... that's cool,
259
00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:30,000
but... but the other thing is,
it's... it's assigned seating,
260
00:10:30,080 --> 00:10:32,160
- so, yeah, there's no...
- Oh, no, he doesn't need a chair.
261
00:10:32,240 --> 00:10:35,160
- I'll squat. Utkatasana.
- Oh, come on, man.
262
00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:37,120
- I... I... I...
- He's my wedding gift!
263
00:10:37,200 --> 00:10:38,240
Yes, it is true.
264
00:10:38,320 --> 00:10:41,400
I plan to capture the sirens
in celluloid forever.
265
00:10:41,480 --> 00:10:43,320
Right, I think they've
got a photographer, probably, so...
266
00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:45,400
Yeah, listen, I guarantee you,
that photographer
267
00:10:45,480 --> 00:10:46,720
is off somewhere right now,
268
00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:48,720
taking a close-up of someone's shoes,
269
00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:50,280
which no one will look at ever.
270
00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:52,240
- Well, be that as it may, I...
- You see, I'm setting up
271
00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:54,080
a locked-off camera for the ceremony.
272
00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:56,000
I've got GoPros for the dance floor.
273
00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:58,240
I have a drone in the car for sunset,
274
00:10:58,320 --> 00:11:00,000
and some fun little cameras
for the toilets.
275
00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:00,520
and some fun little cameras
for the toilets.
276
00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:02,800
- What's that?
- Just some Polaroids
277
00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:04,880
while people freshen up.
278
00:11:04,960 --> 00:11:06,360
Keepsakes.
279
00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:07,680
- It's actually pretty good.
- Mm-hmm.
280
00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:08,920
I've put a lot of thought into it.
281
00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:12,040
I wish you'd put a bit more thought
into what you were wearing.
282
00:11:12,120 --> 00:11:14,400
Well, I'm just getting into
the spirit of things.
283
00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:18,360
- It's revolting.
- Um... I...
284
00:11:26,560 --> 00:11:28,680
- Oh! Perfect.
- Oh!
285
00:11:30,480 --> 00:11:35,000
All right now,
ladies and germs, a bit of hush.
286
00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:37,520
That's right now.
287
00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:43,080
Yep, phones away and pages,
beepers, all away now.
288
00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:46,080
Let's just be with our brides.
289
00:11:46,160 --> 00:11:49,440
Hmm? Uncle Tony, I see you made it.
290
00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:51,640
Very impressive.
291
00:11:51,720 --> 00:11:54,160
What an honour it is
292
00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:56,320
for me to be here today
293
00:11:56,400 --> 00:12:00,000
at the wedding of my gorgeous
niece Renee.
294
00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:00,160
at the wedding of my gorgeous
niece Renee.
295
00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:03,360
Oh, sorry, Rumi.
296
00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:06,960
Odd, I used to change
her nappy as a baby.
297
00:12:07,040 --> 00:12:09,520
- Remember Uncle Tony?
298
00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:13,840
Oh, she had the most beautiful skin
you've ever seen.
299
00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:18,440
I babysat her
and I used to inspect her feet
300
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:23,400
because she had the most exquisite
feet you've ever seen on a child.
301
00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:24,840
Truly!
302
00:12:24,920 --> 00:12:26,680
I watched you grow
303
00:12:26,760 --> 00:12:31,400
into the fully formed woman
that you are today.
304
00:12:32,120 --> 00:12:35,360
And even though you won't let me
near your feet anymore...
305
00:12:36,720 --> 00:12:38,800
I think you're just fantastic.
306
00:12:39,440 --> 00:12:40,960
Thank you. Thank you, Aunty Peta.
307
00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:44,600
- And those feet led you to Megan...
- Yes!
308
00:12:44,680 --> 00:12:47,840
- Who's, oh well! She's lovely too.
309
00:12:47,920 --> 00:12:53,480
So, a poem for the happy couple
by Pablo Neruda.
310
00:12:55,280 --> 00:12:57,480
When I cannot look at your face
311
00:12:58,360 --> 00:12:59,400
I look at your feet
312
00:13:00,440 --> 00:13:02,680
Your feet of arched bone
313
00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:04,520
Your hard little feet
314
00:13:05,640 --> 00:13:07,960
I know that they support you
315
00:13:08,040 --> 00:13:11,360
And that your sweet weight
Rises upon them
316
00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:14,480
Your waist and your breasts
317
00:13:15,280 --> 00:13:18,600
The doubled, purple of your nipples
318
00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:22,240
Your wide fruit mouth...
319
00:13:22,320 --> 00:13:23,800
Is it weird being here for you?
320
00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:28,720
Well, I left my husband of 17 years,
for a girl I'd known for four minutes,
321
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:31,040
and a month later,
I'm working at her wedding.
322
00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:32,520
Yeah, it's pretty fucked up.
323
00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:35,160
Look at my Tinder though.
324
00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:38,680
Okay, last time I was single,
I was having sex with guys this age.
325
00:13:39,160 --> 00:13:41,400
I've gone off, I've had a whole life.
I made three humans.
326
00:13:41,480 --> 00:13:43,840
I've come back, and I can
still have sex with guys this age,
327
00:13:43,920 --> 00:13:45,640
except, like, as a hot,
experienced woman.
328
00:13:45,720 --> 00:13:47,080
Hey, get your phone out.
Let's have a look at yours.
329
00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:48,160
Oh, yeah!
330
00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:51,360
Got my eye
on that little tadpole, Mr Pink.
331
00:13:51,440 --> 00:13:53,160
- Hmm, sexy.
- Yeah.
332
00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:54,760
Oh, shit, okay, quickly,
it's nearly over.
333
00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:55,720
Grab the... grab the champagne.
334
00:13:55,800 --> 00:13:59,640
I now pronounce you wife and wife.
335
00:13:59,720 --> 00:14:00,000
And you may kiss the bride.
336
00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:02,080
And you may kiss the bride.
337
00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:08,040
Yeah, okay,
okay, that's enough.
338
00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:10,520
- All right,
that... that'll do.
339
00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:13,480
-
- I mean, it's not Love Island, is it?
340
00:14:13,560 --> 00:14:14,800
No.
341
00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:19,800
All right, we're going to sort out
the tattooed wedding rings now.
342
00:14:19,880 --> 00:14:23,080
Other than that,
I'll see you on the V floor.
343
00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:26,360
- Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
344
00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:27,880
Bit of housekeeping.
345
00:14:27,960 --> 00:14:29,960
Don't use... there's
two toilets down the end.
346
00:14:30,040 --> 00:14:32,960
Don't use the second one.
That's out of order.
347
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:34,680
I found out the hard way.
348
00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:36,920
But enjoy your night,
349
00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:40,360
and I'll go and touch base
with Tammy.
350
00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:58,520
It's called Men of Men.
351
00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:00,000
And... and this is an app, or...?
352
00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:00,160
And... and this is an app, or...?
353
00:15:00,240 --> 00:15:01,560
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, it will be.
- Uh-huh.
354
00:15:01,640 --> 00:15:05,400
So, basically, you're a part
of a dwindling monarchy,
355
00:15:05,480 --> 00:15:07,800
- and the chalice has been...
- Mm-hmm.
356
00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:09,720
- In the family for generations.
- Right.
357
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:12,640
But the person who drank the poison
doesn't know until the end.
358
00:15:12,720 --> 00:15:14,840
- Right.
- There's also a village idiot...
359
00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:16,440
- Uh-huh.
- Who can hand out these idiot cards.
360
00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:18,000
Now, if you get one of those,
you've got to forget
361
00:15:18,080 --> 00:15:20,320
- every armoury card you ever had.
- Oh, wow!
362
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:22,560
So, you've got the silversmith,
363
00:15:22,640 --> 00:15:24,760
- the blacksmith, the goldsmith.
- Mm-hmm. A lot of smiths.
364
00:15:26,200 --> 00:15:28,000
♪If you don't give up ♪
365
00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:31,680
- ♪You can get it done ♪
366
00:15:31,760 --> 00:15:35,120
- ♪If you don't give up ♪
367
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:36,960
- Hey.
- Hi.
368
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:40,680
You like to dance, Lynelle?
369
00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:42,400
- I love to dance.
- Hmm.
370
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:47,080
- Could have gone professional.
- Oh, I bet you could. Hmm!
371
00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:51,800
I thought you were absolutely
fantastic, uh, the other day at the...
372
00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:54,280
Oh, thank you!
Well, it's for a good cause.
373
00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:58,360
Well, I don't know about that,
but you were... you were tops.
374
00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:00,000
What do you mean?
375
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:00,200
What do you mean?
376
00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:02,640
Well, about the cause.
What, it's Lee's cause?
377
00:16:02,720 --> 00:16:05,920
Well, no, it's
Women Against Women Against...
378
00:16:06,000 --> 00:16:07,400
Sorry, I know what it is, but we...
379
00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:09,360
we are at a lesbian wedding,
so I wouldn't...
380
00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:11,680
Oh, lesbians can be against women.
381
00:16:11,760 --> 00:16:14,520
Well, I... I think they prefer to be,
don't they?
382
00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:17,080
- Oh!
383
00:16:17,160 --> 00:16:18,160
Probably shouldn't joke about that.
384
00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:20,720
Oh! You can't joke
about anything anymore.
385
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:22,720
Hmm.
386
00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:27,840
- ♪If you don't give up ♪
387
00:16:27,920 --> 00:16:30,080
♪You can get it done ♪
388
00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:31,160
Hi.
389
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:33,680
- Having fun there?
390
00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:35,960
You know, these people...
391
00:16:36,960 --> 00:16:38,680
are so beautiful and free.
392
00:16:39,640 --> 00:16:42,000
But I don't think
that they really want me here,
393
00:16:42,080 --> 00:16:43,760
so I'm just wall-flowering.
394
00:16:44,640 --> 00:16:47,240
- I'm sure they want you here.
- No, no, they don't.
395
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,920
They're all about acceptance,
but they don't accept me.
396
00:16:52,440 --> 00:16:56,400
The world is a harsh place
for a straight, white, older gent.
397
00:16:59,920 --> 00:17:00,000
What I'm, somewhat clumsily reaching
for here, Lynelle,
398
00:17:00,000 --> 00:17:03,440
What I'm, somewhat clumsily reaching
for here, Lynelle,
399
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:06,440
is that I think you're a very
vivacious, very attractive woman.
400
00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:09,599
- Oh, thank you.
- You're welcome.
401
00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:12,319
And I've always really enjoyed
our, you know,
402
00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:14,920
our Farmville games
and our Facebook banter.
403
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:18,400
- So have I.
- Your Wordle streak is exceptional.
404
00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:20,400
- It is!
- Yes.
405
00:17:20,480 --> 00:17:21,560
So, um...
406
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:25,079
Yeah, I just want you to know,
that if you ever,
407
00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:28,079
fancy being treated
like the queen that you are,
408
00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:30,240
my door is always open.
409
00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:35,520
- ♪If you don't give up ♪
410
00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:37,520
♪You can get it done ♪
411
00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:43,760
Message received, Bernie.
412
00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:51,320
I... I think the key
with all of this stuff is,
413
00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:53,360
from my experience anyway,
is just listening to...
414
00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:56,320
I mean, no one even asked me,
my pronouns.
415
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:57,520
Not one.
416
00:17:58,120 --> 00:17:59,720
Well, they don't ask me either, mate.
417
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:04,920
But if someone would just ask,
instead of assuming.
418
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:08,600
Okay. What are your pronouns, Lee?
419
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:11,880
He.
420
00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:13,960
It.
421
00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:15,800
Oh. That fits.
422
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:19,760
- Would it like a drink?
- Yes, yes, it would.
423
00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:23,800
You know, in my... in
my day, you didn't get to choose.
424
00:18:23,880 --> 00:18:27,960
You're either A or B, and most of us
just chose A just to fit in.
425
00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:32,600
But if I'm to be terribly honest,
there's plenty of B in me.
426
00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:36,280
I mean, we've all sucked
a cock or two, haven't we?
427
00:18:37,360 --> 00:18:39,240
- Have we?
- Of course we have.
428
00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:47,320
Hey. How's the fringe?
429
00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:49,160
Does it look like I
got it done proper,
430
00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:52,240
or that I cut it myself
high on opioids?
431
00:18:53,680 --> 00:18:55,040
You look beautiful, Ash.
432
00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:57,200
Stop.
433
00:18:58,360 --> 00:18:59,840
What about these ones?
You think they're gonna make it?
434
00:18:59,920 --> 00:19:00,000
Oh, I... I couldn't tell you.
435
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:01,240
Oh, I... I couldn't tell you.
436
00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:03,320
You know what? Fuck it!
They could outlast us all.
437
00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:05,720
- Not us. No. Yeah.
- No, no, not us. Not us.
438
00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:11,560
Come here.
439
00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:16,920
Yeah?
440
00:19:18,520 --> 00:19:21,280
- I love you, Ashley.
- Ooh!
441
00:19:21,840 --> 00:19:24,040
- First time you've said that!
- I know.
442
00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:26,600
- Am I cool about it?
- Pretty cool.
443
00:19:26,680 --> 00:19:28,880
You've left me hanging.
444
00:19:28,960 --> 00:19:31,000
I have thrown it out there
a couple of times.
445
00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:33,200
- Have you?
- Yeah, and I've died.
446
00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:35,480
I'm sorry. I'm a bit slow.
447
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:38,640
I love you too.
448
00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:39,840
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
449
00:19:45,040 --> 00:19:47,120
- Why do you smell funny?
- Oh, is it my mouth?
450
00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:48,640
No, no, it's... Oh, it's...
451
00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:50,880
- Oh!
- Oh, it's the tan.
452
00:19:51,640 --> 00:19:53,840
- It... Oh! It smells
like a mix of... No.
453
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:54,800
- Don't, don't!
454
00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:57,360
It's... it's like...
it's like an apartment.
455
00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:59,240
- Mm-hmm.
- But...
456
00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:00,000
it's had a high turnover of...
457
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:00,960
it's had a high turnover of...
458
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:02,520
- Tenancies.
- Yes.
459
00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:03,840
- Yeah.
- With some low-level
460
00:20:03,920 --> 00:20:05,760
- drug crime in there.
- Yeah, look.
461
00:20:05,840 --> 00:20:09,240
- These walls have seen a lot.
- Hmm. I'm into it.
462
00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:30,400
Bretty, can you get
rid of these, mate?
463
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:35,600
- Gordonza!
- Ah, Jimmy Dean!
464
00:20:36,480 --> 00:20:37,800
- How you going, brother?
- How are you, man?
465
00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:39,560
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, good, man.
- Yeah, good?
466
00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:41,320
- Having a good time?
- Yeah.
467
00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:44,880
Yeah, yeah. Yeah!
468
00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:51,800
Hey, we're all good, eh?
469
00:20:51,880 --> 00:20:54,560
No hard feelings?
You got the girl, all good.
470
00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:56,160
- Yeah, thanks, man.
I appreciate that.
471
00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:56,520
- Hmm.
472
00:20:57,920 --> 00:21:00,000
Yeah. Yeah. All right.
473
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:00,400
Yeah. Yeah. All right.
474
00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:03,560
Yeah, we texted for a little
at the start of your thing.
475
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:06,880
But then I realized, yeah, I'd lost
her, and I... I want to respect that.
476
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:08,800
Thanks, man.
477
00:21:09,440 --> 00:21:10,440
That's cool.
478
00:21:13,680 --> 00:21:15,400
- You all right?
- Yeah, man, I'm...
479
00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:18,200
- I'm knee-deep in poon so I'm good.
- Ah, yeah.
480
00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:22,360
But if I could do it all again,
I'd probably do it differently.
481
00:21:23,040 --> 00:21:24,920
She'll probably always be
the one that got away.
482
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:30,320
Hey, cheers anyway, man.
483
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:31,800
- Hmm.
484
00:21:31,880 --> 00:21:33,040
- Yeah.
- Yeah, yeah.
485
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:38,160
Yeah. It's probably
enough hugs anyway. Cool.
486
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:42,360
Sorry to hear about your old man.
487
00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:45,280
Thanks, man.
488
00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:49,560
- Life only goes in one direction, eh?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's it.
489
00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:50,920
Did he get to meet Ashy?
490
00:21:52,080 --> 00:21:53,320
Yeah, he did, yeah, yeah.
491
00:21:55,080 --> 00:21:56,800
- That's special.
- Yeah.
492
00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:00,000
Yeah.
493
00:22:00,000 --> 00:22:00,560
Yeah.
494
00:22:08,120 --> 00:22:10,640
♪You set my body on fire ♪
495
00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:21,960
♪You set my body on fire ♪
496
00:22:23,280 --> 00:22:24,680
♪Move in a closer ♪
497
00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:28,320
♪Let me see you kissing ♪
498
00:22:30,800 --> 00:22:32,240
♪Wanna see you work it ♪
499
00:23:21,760 --> 00:23:25,400
♪Hey, I got a lot of faith in you ♪
500
00:23:25,480 --> 00:23:26,480
Oh my God! Look!
501
00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:30,240
Ashy?
502
00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:32,320
- Gordon, what are you doing?
- You and I are the best.
503
00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:35,440
We're just the best, and it makes
so much sense to me.
504
00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:38,240
And I want you to marry me.
505
00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:45,440
Will you marry me, Ash?
506
00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:49,800
Gordon, will you please get up?
507
00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:52,840
This is... It's...
508
00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:55,560
This is not our night.
509
00:23:57,840 --> 00:24:00,000
- You're embarrassing him, darling.
- It's okay. It's okay.
510
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:01,040
- You're embarrassing him, darling.
- It's okay. It's okay.
511
00:24:01,120 --> 00:24:02,440
Please, just get up.
512
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:05,160
Really?
513
00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:07,440
Because we can...
514
00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:10,480
we can talk about this later.
515
00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:15,840
- Gor...
- Ta-da!
516
00:24:15,920 --> 00:24:20,600
It's a joke. It was a joke.
It was... it was a full joke.
517
00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:23,200
- Do you guys not get jokes?
518
00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:25,400
Come on, fucking hell.
It was... it was...
519
00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:27,840
Yeah, yeah, yeah, keep filming.
Oh, must film it.
520
00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:30,000
Don't watch with your eyes
and remember with your brain.
521
00:24:30,080 --> 00:24:33,200
- Must be filming at all times.
- She said no.
522
00:24:33,280 --> 00:24:36,520
No, she didn't say no,
because it wasn't a real...
523
00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:41,040
You know what, your generation
does not get humour at all.
524
00:24:41,120 --> 00:24:42,360
Sorry, but it's been said.
525
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:45,120
Freddy, come on. Music, brother.
526
00:24:48,360 --> 00:24:50,160
You're killing the vibe, man.
What's happening?
527
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:51,840
- Sorry, I unplugged
my phone to film it.
528
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:52,760
- Fuck's sake, dude.
529
00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:57,360
Thank you!
530
00:25:00,120 --> 00:25:01,520
♪My, my ♪
531
00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:06,200
♪At Waterloo
Napoleon did surrender ♪
532
00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:07,600
♪Oh, yeah ♪
533
00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:14,040
♪And I have met my destiny
In quite a similar way ♪
534
00:25:14,800 --> 00:25:17,880
♪The history book on the shelf ♪
535
00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:23,240
♪Is always repeating itself ♪
536
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:24,600
♪Waterloo ♪
537
00:25:25,120 --> 00:25:28,080
♪I was defeated, you won the war ♪
538
00:25:30,000 --> 00:25:31,000
♪Waterloo ♪
539
00:25:31,600 --> 00:25:34,400
♪Promise to love you forevermore ♪
540
00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:37,600
♪Waterloo ♪
541
00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:40,840
♪Couldn't escape if I wanted to ♪
542
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:43,880
♪Waterloo ♪
543
00:25:44,520 --> 00:25:47,320
♪Knowing my fate is to be with you ♪
544
00:25:47,760 --> 00:25:50,320
♪Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Waterloo ♪
545
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:53,640
♪Finally facing my Waterloo ♪
546
00:25:54,120 --> 00:25:56,760
♪Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Waterloo ♪
547
00:25:57,440 --> 00:26:00,000
♪Finally facing my Waterloo ♪
548
00:26:00,000 --> 00:26:00,160
♪Finally facing my Waterloo ♪
549
00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:03,800
♪Waterloo ♪
550
00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:06,680
♪Knowing my fate is to be with you ♪
551
00:26:07,120 --> 00:26:09,800
♪Wa-Wa-Wa-Wa-Waterloo ♪
552
00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:11,360
♪Finally... ♪
41341
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