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1
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The following programme
contains strong language,
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00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:06,160
scenes of a sexual nature
and adult themes.
3
00:00:15,720 --> 00:00:17,760
That's it.
4
00:00:20,560 --> 00:00:22,360
Oh, shit!
5
00:00:22,360 --> 00:00:24,400
Who dropped him?
6
00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:28,000
Sort of both of us.
7
00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:30,560
Sort of one of you pick him up.
Yes, my lady.
8
00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:34,000
Oh. Hello.
9
00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:37,280
Aren't you a lovely boy? There.
10
00:00:44,320 --> 00:00:46,840
No. Here.
11
00:00:50,080 --> 00:00:53,720
Before I cut you free...
what shall I call you?
12
00:00:56,880 --> 00:00:58,760
Do I even bother?
13
00:00:58,760 --> 00:01:02,080
Perhaps I should have left you
on the floor to rot.
14
00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:06,440
Do you know why?
15
00:01:07,800 --> 00:01:09,800
You are my second son.
16
00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:13,960
And you will inherit nothing
of any human value.
17
00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:19,640
What use are you to anybody?
18
00:01:28,440 --> 00:01:30,480
Leave him attached for now.
19
00:01:32,440 --> 00:01:35,880
And go, before I avenge
the dropping business.
20
00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:42,520
What of his name, my lady?
21
00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:48,920
He is my George.
22
00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:41,040
Good morning, George.
23
00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:54,760
Maybe you apply it?
24
00:03:57,760 --> 00:04:00,360
Is it sore, brother?
Course it's fucking sore.
25
00:04:00,360 --> 00:04:01,840
Could have ripped his head off.
26
00:04:01,840 --> 00:04:04,360
Now he's on his deathbed
like poor Daddy.
27
00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:06,600
Kit!
Yes, Kit. You and your sister, go.
28
00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:09,720
But why can John stay, Mother?
Because he's the eldest.
29
00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:12,200
And I prefer him.
By quite the margin.
30
00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:18,960
I want to be scarred forever.
31
00:04:18,960 --> 00:04:21,840
Perhaps go, Miss Ashcattle?
And take that one with you.
32
00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:25,560
I told you
to put a cork up it, Jenny.
33
00:04:25,560 --> 00:04:28,880
He's just so... pretty.
34
00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:32,880
What did you do?
I don't want to go.
35
00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:35,000
All I want is Jenny.
36
00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:37,240
I love her.
She's a servant.
37
00:04:37,240 --> 00:04:39,000
Not in my heart.
That's not how it works.
38
00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:41,640
That's not how a single thing
- fucking works.
- Well, it should be.
39
00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:43,760
Are you five?! No.
40
00:04:43,760 --> 00:04:46,440
You will go to France, George.
If you make me go,
41
00:04:46,440 --> 00:04:49,840
I will kill myself,
but this time I will make sure-
42
00:04:49,840 --> 00:04:51,600
Fall in a way that breaks your neck?
43
00:04:51,600 --> 00:04:54,080
So that's why you left me to hang?
44
00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,160
I left you because it was staged,
you were play acting.
45
00:04:57,160 --> 00:04:59,000
It was real, I promise you.
46
00:04:59,000 --> 00:05:00,640
You just want
to send me off to France
47
00:05:00,640 --> 00:05:03,000
to learn the ways of refinement.
48
00:05:03,000 --> 00:05:05,560
And then return to marry
some awful rich wife
49
00:05:05,560 --> 00:05:08,840
and milk her fat fucking dowry.
It's about more than that.
50
00:05:08,840 --> 00:05:11,000
No, it's not.
I never beat you.
51
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:13,320
- Perhaps I'll begin.
- Father has enough
times. Why don't you?
52
00:05:13,320 --> 00:05:14,920
Mother, don't hurt him.
53
00:05:14,920 --> 00:05:16,800
I won't.
54
00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:19,360
Think of John. Eldest and heir,
55
00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:21,400
who will marry him?
56
00:05:21,400 --> 00:05:25,240
How can we build and pass on anything
unless we use your gifts.
57
00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:27,600
What gifts?
If I were a man
58
00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:31,160
and I looked like you,
I'd rule the fucking planet.
59
00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:33,920
I don't want to rule
the fucking planet.
60
00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:38,520
Then it will rule you. Second sons
offer nothing. Inherit nothing.
61
00:05:38,520 --> 00:05:41,720
Raise yourself,
or you will be nothing.
62
00:05:41,720 --> 00:05:43,960
If you make me go...
63
00:05:43,960 --> 00:05:46,400
I will slit my wrists.
I will make sure this time-
64
00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:49,400
Oh, darling, you don't have the will.
65
00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:52,120
Are you scared? Is that it?
66
00:05:52,120 --> 00:05:54,000
To leave me?
67
00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:59,160
Father was always against me going.
68
00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:03,000
And while he still draws breath,
his word means something.
69
00:06:11,000 --> 00:06:15,440
Any final words... from anyone?
70
00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:17,280
Better pack quick, prick.
71
00:06:17,280 --> 00:06:19,040
Apart from those?
72
00:06:26,280 --> 00:06:28,280
Uh...
73
00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:36,200
At least he won't walk out on you.
74
00:06:41,880 --> 00:06:44,200
Get rid of him.
75
00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:46,680
He reeks.
76
00:07:00,480 --> 00:07:03,680
'What were you before
77
00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:06,600
'Sir George Villiers,
Knight of the Shire,
78
00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:09,160
'dragged you from obscurity?
79
00:07:10,640 --> 00:07:13,240
'A serving girl worth nothing.'
80
00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:19,320
And like a fool, I paid off
the Beaumonts so they would lie
81
00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:23,760
and pretend you were one of theirs,
so we might marry.
82
00:07:23,760 --> 00:07:25,600
I gave you the Villiers name,
83
00:07:25,600 --> 00:07:28,800
held by great men for 500 years.
84
00:07:28,800 --> 00:07:30,960
Two hundred, at most.
85
00:07:36,640 --> 00:07:38,560
And what did you give me...
86
00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:40,680
to carry on the Villiers name?
87
00:07:42,120 --> 00:07:46,760
A hollow boy.
All I built dies with your John.
88
00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:57,080
You built nothing but regret,
and syphilis scars.
89
00:07:57,080 --> 00:07:59,960
You think you're funny, bitch?
None of this is. None.
90
00:07:59,960 --> 00:08:02,800
What about that second boy,
why give him my name?
91
00:08:02,800 --> 00:08:04,280
As a warning.
Oh. Of what?
92
00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:06,440
Of what he might become
if I fail him.
93
00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:08,000
More wit.
94
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:10,600
And you'd use my money to send
that little tart to France?
95
00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:12,640
I will.
I won't throw good money after bad.
96
00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:14,440
My George, will go to France
97
00:08:14,440 --> 00:08:16,840
and learn a better way than yours.
98
00:08:16,840 --> 00:08:19,520
All of you can fucking burn.
99
00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:33,280
Anymore to share?
100
00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:45,240
Fuck...
101
00:08:45,240 --> 00:08:47,040
Nor I...
102
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,800
I see you looking
at all the stable lads.
103
00:09:40,800 --> 00:09:42,600
Do you like boys too, or what?
104
00:09:43,480 --> 00:09:45,840
Shut up, Jenny.
105
00:09:46,760 --> 00:09:50,320
I just want you forever.
106
00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:52,640
I'm sorry
about your husband's death,
107
00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:55,120
but I am afraid
I have more bad news.
108
00:09:55,120 --> 00:09:57,320
I know you have little time
for bookkeepers, even-
109
00:09:57,320 --> 00:10:00,760
Assume I have less. I want my
second boy to travel overseas.
110
00:10:00,760 --> 00:10:02,400
There's money for that, surely?
111
00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:06,200
So, I only have the house?
112
00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:09,120
Your husband signed over your house
to one of his cousins.
113
00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:11,120
I think to insulate it
from his debt.
114
00:10:11,120 --> 00:10:13,080
Fuck. Will the cousin sell?
115
00:10:13,080 --> 00:10:15,320
No. You can stay, for a fixed rent.
116
00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:17,440
I have to pay
to live in my own house?
117
00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:20,160
It's not yours, that's the crux-
And-And what do I pay with, vapour?
118
00:10:20,160 --> 00:10:22,160
Money.
119
00:10:25,280 --> 00:10:27,880
There is also this...
120
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:37,560
Payments made, on your behalf,
a long time ago.
121
00:10:37,560 --> 00:10:39,440
To the Beaumont family.
122
00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:43,040
The reason for payment
is specified there.
123
00:10:43,040 --> 00:10:45,360
If this became known,
your position in society
124
00:10:45,360 --> 00:10:47,040
would become untenable.
125
00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:56,560
Never tell anyone of this.
Understand?
126
00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:06,840
But tell me...
127
00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:08,760
what do I do for capital?
128
00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:10,840
There's only one option.
129
00:11:11,960 --> 00:11:14,240
Marry again?
130
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:16,920
Is there any worse Hell
than a woman's?
131
00:11:16,920 --> 00:11:18,640
I could suggest suitable bachelors?
132
00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:21,600
Though you would have to wait
to not seem too unseemly.
133
00:11:21,600 --> 00:11:24,040
How many weeks?
Four at least.
134
00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:25,680
Six if you care for...
135
00:11:51,400 --> 00:11:54,800
Sir Thomas Compton?
Afraid so. You?
136
00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:57,120
Your next wife.
137
00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:59,120
Sorry, love?
Don't be.
138
00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:01,400
What is this? Really?
139
00:12:01,400 --> 00:12:03,360
A proposal. Really.
140
00:12:03,360 --> 00:12:05,200
To what, marry you?
141
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:07,640
I'm way past
all that shit and noise.
142
00:12:07,640 --> 00:12:09,680
Are you? You've had enough wives?
143
00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:11,720
For two lifetimes. Three.
144
00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:14,320
Why not live one more time?
145
00:12:16,080 --> 00:12:19,520
Well, the cost, for a start.
All living costs until we're free.
146
00:12:19,520 --> 00:12:22,240
Mm. Well, until that day,
why encourage more expense
147
00:12:22,240 --> 00:12:26,040
and more pain?
Companionship, no? Closeness?
148
00:12:26,040 --> 00:12:28,080
Well, that's something I've missed.
149
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:31,760
As have I. And no,
I know you are self-made.
150
00:12:31,760 --> 00:12:35,120
I want none of your fortune.
No rights of acquisition,
151
00:12:35,120 --> 00:12:39,880
or inheritance. Nothing, except...
Except...?
152
00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:44,360
Except before we are wed: a small
stipend to cover my son's education.
153
00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:47,400
Ah-ha!
First, you talk like a courtesan
154
00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,600
and now, just like a bookkeeper?
Front and back of the same shop.
155
00:12:50,600 --> 00:12:52,680
Fuck me down.
156
00:12:52,680 --> 00:12:56,080
You are forward.
I have been held back far too long.
157
00:12:56,080 --> 00:12:58,480
Seems to me like nothing
holds you back, like you're used
158
00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:00,480
to getting what you want?
Oh, quite the opposite.
159
00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:04,240
Why I'm presenting
such favourable terms.
160
00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:07,760
Come. Let us live.
161
00:13:07,760 --> 00:13:11,080
You really value your son's
education enough to endure me?
162
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:14,320
You seem entirely
endurable, Sir Thomas.
163
00:13:15,720 --> 00:13:18,240
And, you should know...
I am Mary.
164
00:13:26,760 --> 00:13:29,200
You're just spitting in it.
165
00:13:30,440 --> 00:13:33,560
Just take your time.
Like I showed you.
166
00:13:34,880 --> 00:13:37,520
I am to marry again.
167
00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:40,720
Who? Father's barely in the ground.
168
00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:43,000
It won't affect you,
you'll be in France.
169
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:44,800
You leave in a few days.
It's all arranged.
170
00:13:44,800 --> 00:13:46,200
I don't want to go.
171
00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:48,320
Your want is irrelevant.
Can the music play?
172
00:13:49,720 --> 00:13:52,480
I miss the music.
All I want... is Jenny.
173
00:13:52,480 --> 00:13:54,240
Do you know of Jenny's family?
174
00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:57,880
Her father? Her brothers?
Brutes, all.
175
00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:01,160
And if you stay in England, I'll have
no choice but to send her home.
176
00:14:01,160 --> 00:14:04,240
She's terrified of them.
I know, isn't it awful?
177
00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:05,600
You wouldn't.
178
00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:11,280
You cannot sacrifice her to them.
Please.
179
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:18,400
I hate you.
180
00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:20,600
Only because you know I'm right.
181
00:15:08,840 --> 00:15:10,880
Whoa!
182
00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:15,720
Oh, he's fainted?
183
00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:18,560
Or he's choking?
184
00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:27,640
I've never left England before.
I've never been out to sea.
185
00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:29,560
My French...
186
00:15:29,560 --> 00:15:33,880
is so 'sans', I'll-I'll never-
You have nothing to fear in France.
187
00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:41,240
What if I go later? When I'm older?
188
00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:42,440
You could.
189
00:15:42,440 --> 00:15:44,800
But if you miss this chance,
you will fail us all.
190
00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:48,760
And live, like your father,
smeared in the unwashable excrement
191
00:15:48,760 --> 00:15:51,160
of eternal shame.
192
00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:53,200
Bon voyage.
193
00:16:31,800 --> 00:16:35,120
Monsieur.
I am Jean. How was your journey?
194
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:45,240
Right.
195
00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:47,840
That good?
196
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:49,880
Come.
197
00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:14,240
How were you hurt, friend?
198
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:18,040
Oh, uh... I took a tumble.
So, you didn't try to hang yourself?
199
00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:21,560
No.
200
00:17:22,440 --> 00:17:25,600
Where did you hear that?
Your mother.
201
00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:27,760
Told me in her letters.
202
00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:30,360
It's private.
She's paying me to help you.
203
00:17:30,360 --> 00:17:33,000
Like I help all the English boys
who come here.
204
00:17:34,600 --> 00:17:36,680
And how can I help you
if I don't know who you are?
205
00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:40,560
So please, do not lie to me again.
206
00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:43,440
Or how will you become a gentleman?
207
00:18:06,400 --> 00:18:08,400
'Nous voila'.
208
00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:17,360
Why-Why is there no-one here
to greet me?
209
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:20,440
In England, its customary
for the household-They're busy.
210
00:18:21,480 --> 00:18:23,520
Doing what?
211
00:18:52,760 --> 00:18:54,840
Ah...
Oh, I...I apologise, sir.
212
00:18:57,160 --> 00:18:59,200
Thank... No, thank you.
213
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:05,800
Did you take me through there
on purpose...
214
00:19:05,800 --> 00:19:07,600
to humiliate me?
215
00:19:17,360 --> 00:19:19,360
The other...
216
00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:33,120
Where are we?
217
00:19:33,120 --> 00:19:34,560
France.
218
00:19:45,080 --> 00:19:46,960
Come on.
219
00:19:46,960 --> 00:19:49,160
Purchased the place
after I made real money.
220
00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:51,520
When we still had young children.
221
00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:54,360
Perhaps it's ill-advised, rattling
around here, alone in my cage,
222
00:19:54,360 --> 00:19:56,600
all these years?
There are worse cages.
223
00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:58,960
So, you won't mind living here?
224
00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:12,200
What's wrong?
Do know, Mary,
225
00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:14,080
I'll not risk all this.
226
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:17,480
A contract must signed.
Don't worry. I know just the man.
227
00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:09,800
My God, George. What is that?
228
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:14,560
It was a gift.
A gift?
229
00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:18,560
A gift? Who from, a child?
230
00:21:23,280 --> 00:21:25,600
Why would you do that?
231
00:21:28,480 --> 00:21:30,400
Follow me, Mr Piper.
232
00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:32,720
That was a present.
Oh, you want to be known
233
00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:34,720
as the son of a knight
who falls in love with stupid
234
00:21:34,720 --> 00:21:37,160
little serving girls and also plays
a shitty pauper's flute?
235
00:21:37,160 --> 00:21:39,840
So, you know about that, too?
I know everything.
236
00:21:41,320 --> 00:21:44,200
Your poor older brother.
237
00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:46,240
Your violent father.
238
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:49,400
How he beat you...
239
00:21:50,640 --> 00:21:52,560
...daily.
240
00:21:52,560 --> 00:21:54,600
And you never fought back.
241
00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:57,840
You just...
242
00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:01,240
...took it.
243
00:22:02,120 --> 00:22:04,400
Mm.
What was I supposed to do?
244
00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:07,920
Defend yourself.
245
00:22:11,560 --> 00:22:13,480
Like a man.
246
00:22:13,480 --> 00:22:15,520
Not shiver and cry, like a lost boy.
247
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:31,200
Voila.
248
00:22:34,960 --> 00:22:37,000
Own your body.
249
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,040
Your territory.
250
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:41,800
In France,
251
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:45,400
and even in your wet, sad excuse
of a little fucking country,
252
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:49,760
it counts for who you are, George.
253
00:22:51,320 --> 00:22:53,320
Yes?
254
00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:57,440
There are rules for those who rule.
255
00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:59,480
Codes.
256
00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:04,840
Honour.
257
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:11,960
Also...
258
00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:15,560
...from now on...
259
00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:18,320
no more English. It is like um...
260
00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:24,160
...disease of the tongue,
it debases the mind.
261
00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:27,520
So, from now on...
262
00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:41,440
There.
263
00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:12,400
Ah...
264
00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:13,680
Ooh!
265
00:25:26,600 --> 00:25:29,480
There are 15 rooms that
are being decorated at the moment.
266
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:34,600
OK. I'll report that two or three
months' time would have been fine.
267
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:37,080
Thank you.
Yes.
268
00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:51,000
Who was that?
You don't wanna know.
269
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:52,960
How's your fetching lad
doing in France?
270
00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:55,360
He turned full frog yet?
No. Tell me, who was it?
271
00:25:55,360 --> 00:25:57,960
Him?
The parasite's parasite.
272
00:25:59,040 --> 00:26:01,080
Advance party.
Scouting for the King.
273
00:26:01,080 --> 00:26:03,360
His Majesty's summer travels
bring him our way.
274
00:26:03,360 --> 00:26:05,160
He must be housed and fed,
watered and wiped.
275
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:07,200
The King will be staying here?
Oh, God, fucking no.
276
00:26:07,200 --> 00:26:09,480
Our renovations
won't be finished in time.
277
00:26:09,480 --> 00:26:11,560
What renovations?
I thought you were the bright one
278
00:26:11,560 --> 00:26:14,200
- of your brood, Mary.
- Why would
you lie about having renovations?
279
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:17,320
I put King James up once before
and the big buggering goatfucker
280
00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:21,520
nearly bankrupted me ten times over.
- More.
- Is it not worth the price?
281
00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:24,400
How provincial are you, girl?
I have never met the King.
282
00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:26,760
I should like to.
283
00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:28,840
For once in my life.
284
00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:30,960
I understand your instinct.
I do, really.
285
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:33,400
But, honestly,
it is a fucking nightmare.
286
00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:36,520
The Expense. Paperwork. The mess.
287
00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:38,800
Or...
288
00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:41,040
do you think you can seduce
His Maj how you did me?
289
00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:43,640
- I could try.
- Well, I fear
you've got one too few penises
290
00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:46,280
and two too many tits.
Well, I know about the King's tastes.
291
00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:50,120
But still, I'd enjoy the privilege.
Time with him.
292
00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:53,000
Conversation.
Conversation?!
293
00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:56,160
He won't give you a second fucking
- glance, woman.
- A first is fine.
294
00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:58,760
Look, I-I admit, I am provincial.
295
00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:00,840
My husband barely let
our family leave the house.
296
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:03,520
I've been shuttered away
in the dark for so long,
297
00:27:03,520 --> 00:27:07,640
I want to emerge into the light.
Let me meet His Majesty, please.
298
00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:09,720
I promise you, love.
299
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:13,080
The King is a dead-eyed,
horny-handed horror
300
00:27:13,080 --> 00:27:15,680
who surrounds himself with many
deceitful, well-hung beauties
301
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:17,040
unlike anything you know.
302
00:27:17,040 --> 00:27:19,480
Indulge me, husband.
303
00:27:19,480 --> 00:27:22,320
What's the worst
a well-hung beauty can do?
304
00:27:22,320 --> 00:27:24,160
You'll find out.
305
00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:57,840
Whoa, there!
306
00:27:59,320 --> 00:28:03,080
Sir David Graham. Only Englishman
on the King's staff.
307
00:28:03,080 --> 00:28:05,520
A shineless turd of a man,
but I feel for him.
308
00:28:05,520 --> 00:28:08,120
Why, if he's a turd?
Because he has to deal with them.
309
00:28:08,120 --> 00:28:11,280
The Well-Hung Crew.
The men of the King's bedchamber.
310
00:28:11,280 --> 00:28:13,320
All Scots.
311
00:28:13,320 --> 00:28:15,760
And he, most hung:
312
00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:17,640
Earl of Somerset.
313
00:28:17,640 --> 00:28:20,440
The King's...
well, every-fucking-thing.
314
00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:25,760
All of you inside!
315
00:28:27,160 --> 00:28:30,320
King James is tired,
does not want to see anyone.
316
00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:48,560
King James will not be
ready to see anyone until dinner.
317
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:49,920
Is this normal?
318
00:28:49,920 --> 00:28:52,240
Nothing's normal with these cunts.
319
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:20,920
Hm.
320
00:29:38,720 --> 00:29:40,360
Any news, my lord?
321
00:29:42,160 --> 00:29:45,280
Oh, the King is...
more tired than we thought.
322
00:29:45,280 --> 00:29:48,000
He may, in fact, be very ill.
323
00:29:48,000 --> 00:29:50,480
As such, he does not want to dine.
324
00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:54,720
Or anyone else to, either,
325
00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:57,640
in case the sound
of your collective masticating
326
00:29:57,640 --> 00:30:00,520
echoes through
to his very modest rooms
327
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:03,560
and disturbs
his fragile peace yet further.
328
00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:07,320
If King James is not himself,
then of course none of us shall eat.
329
00:30:07,320 --> 00:30:12,080
But may you stay a while with us
and we converse with you, my lord?
330
00:30:12,080 --> 00:30:14,120
No.
331
00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:26,520
Go.
332
00:30:33,480 --> 00:30:36,080
What is wrong with the King?
You may never know.
333
00:30:37,240 --> 00:30:40,520
He is prone to illness,
but also moods, tempers, hangovers.
334
00:30:40,520 --> 00:30:43,720
And then you have Somerset
who lies as often as he defecates.
335
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:47,120
So... forget him,
336
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:49,160
come to bed.
337
00:30:51,040 --> 00:30:55,320
Or are you gonna stalk the halls all
night trying to get a wee glimpse?
338
00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:19,040
Why do this here?
Fucking relax!
339
00:31:19,040 --> 00:31:22,720
You mean accept less than I deserve?
No, I mean... No! Robert!
340
00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:24,760
Where are you going?
341
00:31:28,560 --> 00:31:31,520
What are you doing? Are you a spy?
342
00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:34,080
It is my house, my Lord.
No. No. No. No.
343
00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:38,520
I am Lord Chamberlain,
privy councillor.
344
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:42,560
Wherever I am is my property
for the King's business.
345
00:31:46,280 --> 00:31:48,440
What? What is it?
346
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:51,400
You are so handsome.
347
00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:55,640
But you must be terrified, no?
348
00:31:55,640 --> 00:31:59,120
His head will turn one day
for another more beautiful?
349
00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:01,760
Well, luckily, there is no such man.
350
00:32:01,760 --> 00:32:03,800
If there is we'll have to meet him.
351
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:07,960
You really want to meet some-
It was a wee joke, for fuck's sake!
352
00:32:07,960 --> 00:32:09,840
Your Majesty.
353
00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:12,920
Now, where were we
before all those rash, silly words?
354
00:32:14,360 --> 00:32:16,360
Must we fight like cats?
355
00:32:17,480 --> 00:32:19,480
We should play.
356
00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:23,040
We should play like pups.
357
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:45,000
To the kennels.
358
00:32:51,200 --> 00:32:53,440
For a thousand years,
since the Romans, since Hadrian,
359
00:32:53,440 --> 00:32:55,840
we kept the Scottish hordes at bay.
360
00:32:55,840 --> 00:32:58,520
Not much more than a decade
of James' rule
361
00:32:58,520 --> 00:33:00,680
and we're over-run here at home.
362
00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:03,560
The King is Scottish.
You don't want a new monarch?
363
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:06,440
That's treason.
No, I like the King.
364
00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:09,520
Even pity him. He's a...
he a different kind of Celt.
365
00:33:09,520 --> 00:33:14,160
I mean that surly sodomite Somerset
and his Scottish semen-guzzlers.
366
00:33:14,160 --> 00:33:17,920
So, you'd prefer we were ruled by
our own plucky, homegrown sodomites?
367
00:33:19,280 --> 00:33:21,160
It would be better.
368
00:33:23,280 --> 00:33:25,280
Why? Do you know any?
369
00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:28,240
I may.
370
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:31,760
Jean...
371
00:34:56,840 --> 00:34:58,040
George...
372
00:35:39,720 --> 00:35:41,280
Ah...
373
00:36:04,640 --> 00:36:06,640
Mm.
374
00:36:25,960 --> 00:36:27,680
I don't understand.
375
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:30,840
You said there were rules.
376
00:36:32,240 --> 00:36:34,720
Rules about how one should act...
377
00:36:34,720 --> 00:36:36,480
about honour.
No, no, no.
378
00:38:52,640 --> 00:38:54,560
I like giraffes.
379
00:38:54,560 --> 00:38:57,000
Good. Me too.
380
00:38:57,000 --> 00:38:58,920
Such long necks.
381
00:38:58,920 --> 00:39:00,920
Colours of dawn and day.
Mm.
382
00:39:00,920 --> 00:39:02,960
Yah!
383
00:39:05,160 --> 00:39:07,160
Whoa!
384
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:27,520
Who's this stranger?
It's me, Mother.
385
00:39:27,520 --> 00:39:29,560
My son's not due back
for another week.
386
00:39:31,240 --> 00:39:33,000
Did you miss me?
387
00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:37,880
Is it George?!
Welcome home.
388
00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:39,720
Whoever you are.
389
00:39:41,800 --> 00:39:44,000
Oh!
390
00:39:46,120 --> 00:39:48,600
Your new inclination...
always in you, I think.
391
00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:53,320
They're more than that.
They're currency.
392
00:39:53,320 --> 00:39:55,280
You married well.
393
00:39:56,600 --> 00:39:58,760
And I hear the King visits you here?
It's impressive.
394
00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:01,720
Once. Briefly. Unimpressive.
395
00:40:01,720 --> 00:40:03,840
What's he like? James?
396
00:40:03,840 --> 00:40:06,080
So, cock-struck it's like a curse.
397
00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:08,880
Yes, the French say that. And laugh.
Well, it's not funny to him.
398
00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:12,120
They also say how weary he is?
Of Somerset?
399
00:40:12,120 --> 00:40:15,360
They argue like man
- and wife.
- What about mine?
400
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:19,400
Have you found me a wife? I'm sure
you have just the girl in mind?
401
00:40:19,400 --> 00:40:21,200
Hmm. I think we aim higher.
402
00:40:22,440 --> 00:40:27,280
James dines soon at Apethorpe with
his brother-in-law, the Danish King.
403
00:40:27,280 --> 00:40:30,960
And a new friend tells me
there are openings for cupbearers.
404
00:40:30,960 --> 00:40:34,240
You want me to hold a man's cup
while he swallows?
405
00:40:34,240 --> 00:40:37,240
I'll leave the specifics to you,
but it's not a man.
406
00:40:37,240 --> 00:40:38,600
It's a King.
407
00:40:39,920 --> 00:40:42,720
So, are you ready
for His Majesty or not?
408
00:40:50,760 --> 00:40:54,280
Now, now... this tray of delights
is fit for His Majesty.
409
00:40:54,280 --> 00:40:56,320
Well, two of their Majesties.
410
00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:59,920
The Danes' they love their meat,
they do. So, what are you gonna do?
411
00:40:59,920 --> 00:41:02,440
I thought I was supposed
to be serving drinks?
412
00:41:02,440 --> 00:41:04,360
You were. To be.
413
00:41:04,360 --> 00:41:06,800
Our darling lad little Laurence
here was meant to be serving
414
00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:09,640
the two-king table their meat
tonight, but some Devil...
415
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:14,760
...pulled their Devil strings
and instead, it's the Devil you.
416
00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:18,080
Do be careful.
417
00:41:18,080 --> 00:41:20,000
Heavy load, that.
418
00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:22,480
Yeah...
419
00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:25,760
Thank you, chef.
420
00:43:04,080 --> 00:43:06,720
Calm yourself.
Do you know the customary punishment
421
00:43:06,720 --> 00:43:09,040
for starting a physical assault
in your monarch's presence?
422
00:43:09,040 --> 00:43:11,080
You lose a hand.
423
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:16,120
As there are two kings here:
it's both.
424
00:43:16,120 --> 00:43:20,480
Stop resisting my husband.
He tripped me deliberately!
425
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:23,280
Don't you dare talk back
to the woman who shares my bed!
426
00:43:23,280 --> 00:43:25,840
You will be silent and still,
427
00:43:25,840 --> 00:43:27,680
or it will be a massacre.
428
00:43:32,160 --> 00:43:35,600
The other boy did trip him.
Sought his own justice.
429
00:43:35,600 --> 00:43:38,280
There's no need to implement more.
- All is done.
- Your Majesty, I-
430
00:43:38,280 --> 00:43:41,000
Ah, ah... Does King Christian agree?
431
00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:44,640
I enjoyed the fight,
but I'm here for the ale.
432
00:43:44,640 --> 00:43:48,360
And what is Queen Anne's decree?
433
00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:53,520
Same as my king's.
434
00:43:54,640 --> 00:43:57,680
Let the boy keep both wrists.
You saw what you saw.
435
00:44:03,400 --> 00:44:05,320
Back to work lad.
436
00:44:06,360 --> 00:44:07,920
Music.
437
00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:50,440
Apethorpe went well, then?
438
00:45:52,280 --> 00:45:53,720
When you were young...
439
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:57,040
...did you ever disgrace your family?
440
00:45:58,840 --> 00:46:01,480
I barely knew them.
441
00:46:01,480 --> 00:46:03,360
Who raised you?
442
00:46:03,360 --> 00:46:05,360
Myself.
443
00:46:05,360 --> 00:46:07,400
I raised myself.
444
00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:11,840
No...
445
00:46:14,960 --> 00:46:16,960
...like this.
446
00:46:22,560 --> 00:46:24,560
Do you know why you couldn't?
447
00:46:25,480 --> 00:46:27,480
Pride.
448
00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:31,520
I have none.
Oh, of course you do.
449
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:33,560
Now, tell me what happened.
450
00:46:34,440 --> 00:46:36,440
Leave nothing out.
451
00:46:37,960 --> 00:46:39,960
We face the world together.
452
00:46:42,880 --> 00:46:44,880
My first child died inside me.
453
00:46:46,600 --> 00:46:48,600
My second was John.
454
00:46:50,080 --> 00:46:52,080
And then, there was you.
455
00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:55,600
Second sons are usually
a waste of life
456
00:46:55,600 --> 00:46:59,840
and yet I knew, as I held you
with your grace and light,
457
00:46:59,840 --> 00:47:01,880
I might raise you up.
458
00:47:06,360 --> 00:47:08,360
I'm sorry.
Why?
459
00:47:12,440 --> 00:47:14,880
I ruined everything-
Self-pity is so ugly,
460
00:47:14,880 --> 00:47:16,920
leave it for the ugly.
461
00:47:17,880 --> 00:47:21,320
But beauty is fragile.
It does not last.
462
00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:23,880
So, we must act quickly.
463
00:47:23,880 --> 00:47:26,360
But how?
Kings do not pardon men
464
00:47:26,360 --> 00:47:29,280
for crimes done in their sight
against their lover's say.
465
00:47:29,280 --> 00:47:31,320
Unless they yearn for the new.
466
00:47:32,920 --> 00:47:34,960
He saw you.
467
00:47:34,960 --> 00:47:38,200
And he will think of you tonight
as he sleeps...
468
00:47:38,200 --> 00:47:40,840
wakes... defecates.
469
00:47:40,840 --> 00:47:44,680
Pleasures himself. All we need to do
is get you back in his sight.
470
00:47:48,840 --> 00:47:50,840
Are you pleased with me?
471
00:47:52,760 --> 00:47:55,440
As the snake
as Eve ate her dark fruit.
472
00:47:56,760 --> 00:48:00,200
If we tread right, George,
he'll be yours.
473
00:48:00,200 --> 00:48:02,200
Mine.
474
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:04,240
Ours.
475
00:48:11,800 --> 00:48:13,800
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