All language subtitles for Here.To.Climb.2024.720p.WEBRip.x264.AAC-YIFY

[TV static drones]

[bright tone]

[crunching footsteps]

[feet scraping]

[suspenseful orchestral music]

♪ ♪

Climbing's always
been my first love.

[hyperventilating and giggling]

Sasha showing some finesse.
[cheers and applause]

Since I was 16, I've been
in the limelight of climbing.

No question, the best
female climber in our country.

I love the winning.

First place,
Sasha DiGiulian.

People were like,
Sasha DiGiulian,

this little kid
that's crushing everything.

Every time I climb, it's like
you fall, you fall, you fall.

Slam into the wall,
and it hurts.

Kinda frustrated.

♪ ♪

I learned in order
to capitalize

on your achievements,
you need to capture them.

[upbeat music]

Social media changed the game.

This is Sasha DiGiulian
tuning in.

It's like a level of intimacy

that never existed
in climbing before.

She changed
the face of climbing.

[camera shutter clicking]

The fact that
I'm marketable...

Is my hair okay?

Kind of not, but.

Enables me to do what I do
and make a living off of it.

Once you share yourself
with the world,

people are going to have
a problem with you.

But if you have haters,

that's how you know
you made it.

Her definition of success
is that she gets to the top.

You have such
an incredible career.

[cheers and applause]

She's so polarizing.

I don't know how much of Sasha
is a crafted public persona.

[Sasha groans]

She doesn't
look like a climber.

Some people say, "Why are
you sexualizing the sport?"

People criticize her and
call her dumb and anorexic.

Sasha's story is amazing.

That's why it's so frustrating

when Sasha overhypes
some ascents.

If you omit certain details,

people are going
to be suspicious.

It's bullshit.

I just play the game.

Okay, don't mess this up.

You know what to do.

[cheers and applause]

Right, left, pull, foot up,

push, push, push.

Make it up there,
make it up there.

[suspenseful ambient music]

♪ ♪

[birds singing]

♪ ♪

Very good.

Whoo.

Yes, summit.

Our anchor.

- Yeah.
- Nice.

[both imitate explosion]

And it's not dark.

It's not dark.
Yeah.

Only almost.
- Almost.

No, we got time.
- Yeah.

All right,
so I'm going to tie you in.

Lynn started out as my idol,

the woman that I grew up
with a poster of on my wall

in my childhood bedroom.

Yes, with one direction.
Here's the X, see?

Then she became a friend...

That's how I'm going
to tie in.

And a mentor.

- Tying to the end here.
- Yeah.

As long as
we trust that one sling.

We can have a backup, though.
- Yeah.

Lynn did this epic feat

of climbing the Nose
on El Cap.

And the Nose had
never been done

by a man or a woman before.

She did it over four days.

Then the next year,
she came back

and did it in a single day.

And then she made
this famous quip...

Good setup.

♪ ♪

And I saw that as just--

I want to do something
like that one day.

- Hasta la vista.
- Whoo-hoo.

It's going to be
an exciting rappel.

Lynn comes from this

traditional climbing background,

grew up really
in the outdoor environment.

And I grew up
climbing in a gym.

I started climbing when
I was six years old.

My brother had
a birthday party

at a climbing gym
called Sportrock

in Alexandria, Virginia.

What I remember was
walking in,

the gym smelling, like,
musty, dirty feet

and a slight tinge of pizza.

I really liked it.

I kept going back in line
to have another turn.

Sasha quickly progressed
from being

a child who liked to climb
to being a competitor.

What's your strategy today?

Two things: to win

and to climb as many races
I can so I get 1,000 bucks.

She loved
the gym competitions.

She excelled in them.

It became obvious that

she wanted to be serious
about that.

[indistinct PA announcement]

[cheers and applause]

- I loved winning.
- Yeah!

Winning my first
continental championships,

winning my first nationals,

it was, like,
the greatest feeling.

I met Sasha when
she was, I think,

like 14 or 15 years old.

We both lived in D.C.

and were climbing
in the same climbing gym.

And she was the little squirt

that was warming up
on my projects.

[chuckles]

Yeah, she definitely stood out.

When Sasha was
building her career,

she was a young, attractive,
blonde, blue-eyed girl

doing some really cool things.

She loves climbing,

but she uses it
to make a living.

It's impressive.

- I want to see that logo.
- Oh, yeah.

It's just bunched
on this side.

So maybe just pull your
jacket down and fold it.

Just curl it up or something.
- Oh, okay.

Since I had achieved
at that point

what I wanted to achieve
in indoor climbing

and I started
using my winter breaks

and summer breaks
to be outside on rock.

[suspenseful music]

I never kind of ventured into
this new world unknown before.

[energetic ambient music]

♪ ♪

The following summer,
I did my first big wall

with Edu Marin, who is a
professional Spanish climber.

Bella Vista was classified

as the hardest big wall
achieved by a woman.

It was my first female ascent
of a big wall,

proving to myself that
anything was possible.

♪ ♪

It's a serious endeavor
to climb a big wall,

and it requires a lot
of technical knowledge

and mental fortitude and then,
of course, the strength.

Sport climbing is a very
individualistic pursuit.

Big wall climbing
is about teamwork

and about partnership.

So it was a big transition
for Sasha

because you can't do it
all by yourself anymore.

And the list of things
that could go wrong...

[chuckling]
Is pretty much infinite.

[wind whistling]

My next climb was the Eiger.

The route that
I wanted to do was

one of the hardest
established routes

on the north face
of the Eiger,

and it had never been done
by a woman before.

[tense music]

That was exciting to me.

I wanted to do something
that was record-breaking.

♪ ♪

And I told my sponsors
about it

and they were instantly
really excited

and put in the resources to
filming and making it happen.

♪ ♪

I saw the climb that
I wanted to do

on the north face of the Eiger

as something that was
under the grade level

that I climbed.

I thought, like,
"What's the big deal?"

There's a lot
to big wall climbing

that you don't know
until you're out there.

And all of it I was learning
while literally there.

♪ ♪

My climbing partner
was Carlo Traversi,

and we were going
through these pockets

of really bad weather,
running out of time,

so we changed routes
to something easier.

And it was still
a first female ascent.

I was like, adjust course,
secure a summit.

[suspenseful orchestral music]

♪ ♪

So all of a sudden,
I come back home

and there's so much hype.

Sasha DiGiulian
has just become

the first woman to free-climb
the north face of the Eiger.

The first woman ever
to scale the Murder Wall.

Just days before
starting her senior year

at Columbia University,
DiGiulian reached the summit.

My proudest achievement
in my career yet.

It's the hardest route
on the 5,000-foot north face,

and DiGiulian has made
the first female ascent.

My main focus in climbing--

When you're trying to
make a living off your sport

and getting media attention,
you're not going to say no.

I've proven to myself that

something that I didn't know
was possible was possible.

Yes.

Whoo!

It makes your career grow.

But the climbing community
was basically like,

"What the fuck?"

[suspenseful music]

I feel like
every big thing she's done,

there's always
the weird asterisk,

always weird rumors,
and maybe that's people hating.

Maybe that's people
being sexist.

The toughest thing for me
about the criticism

that I got from the Eiger
was that

it was actually
more grounded in fact.

It wasn't that big of a feat.

Carlo Traversi,
my climbing partner,

was never mentioned
in the press.

I was like this outsider
coming into this world

that was highly protected

and all of a sudden,
getting a lot of attention

for something
that felt overhyped.

So all of this critique

made me want to just
keep making a bigger splash.

I just saw the negative
as like, watch me.

I'll keep going.

[dramatic percussive music]

♪ ♪

[camera shutter clicking]

[birds singing]

Hello.

How do you feel?

Not bad.

[wondrous ambient music]

I'm really competitive.

Little bit sandy.

And I also love
feeling in control.

♪ ♪

What I love about climbing
is in many ways,

I've always been in control
of my own success.

Like, what I get out of it
is up to me.

I was racking up first ascents
and first female ascents

with male
professional climbers.

And that's how
I've kind of grown

and expanded in my skill set.

[panting]

We would push each other
really hard,

pushing my comfort zone.

♪ ♪

The spring of 2018, I set
out on this crazy objective

of climbing three
of Canada's hardest big walls.

But I broke up
with my climbing partner.

Ah.

And I ended up doing
it on my own

with the support of Blairs.

♪ ♪

Whoo!

After that, I was like,
"Whoa, I feel limitless."

We did it!

Yeah!

I'd put to bed these whispers

of me needing
a male climbing partner

to help get up these walls.

Oh, my God.

Way to go, team!

- Whoo-hoo!
- Whoo!

It was very empowering
in the sense

that I knew I had the skills
and the capacity

to lead an all-female team
on an expedition.

[birds singing]

I guess, yeah.

It was really cool to see

Sash coming off
of the trilogy,

and she really wanted
her next big expedition

to be an all-female team.

Tricams that Lynn gave me.

Sash wants to prove

that she's one of
the most successful

female climbers in the world
and one of the most successful

big wall female climbers
in the world,

which is an even more rarefied
group of individuals.

Okay.

This is the climb
that we're trying.

It's Leve Leve
by the Pou brothers.

[soft upbeat percussive music]

This is all super-vegetated
terrain.

And the rock,
it's hard to tell

how it is
since it's so overgrown.

♪ ♪

I decided
to self-fund the expedition.

♪ ♪

[indistinct chatter]

♪ ♪

The goal is to be
the first woman

to climb a route up
Pico Cao Grande,

which was the largest
volcanic plug in the world.

♪ ♪

I just wanted to go there
with a climbing partner

that I felt comfortable with
and trusted.

Oh, man.

Holy epic-ness.

And you're literally
entrusting your lives

into each other's hands,

and you're all working
together towards this goal.

Oh, my God.
Like, it's like--it's there.

It's so crazy.
- It's there. We're here.

Like, we're looking
at this thing at a picture

in my house, and, like--

When I got the call
from Sasha to go to Africa,

I was over the moon.

When I first saw
Pico Cao Grande,

I was floored.
It was beautiful.

[ethereal ambient music]

♪ ♪

I met Angela on the
Upper Peninsula of Michigan

on an ice climbing trip.

I was pretty green
to ice climbing,

and Angela really mentored me.

The rock.

Oh, I'm so pumped.

God.

♪ ♪

And then--oh, dude!

There's the bolt. First bolt.
- Where?

After that crack system.

- Is that the face?
- Yeah.

That way.

[indistinct chatter]

My thoughts were that
Angela and I would swap leads,

and essentially I would lead
the harder-graded climbs,

and she would lead more
of the adventure terrain.

Oh, the rock.

Jungle.

♪ ♪

I'm spider-webby.
- It's really gravelly.

I fought a lot of spiders
coming up.

You're a little dirty.

Sharp rock.

And it's pouring rain,
and I'm getting a little--

- Yeah, we're getting misted.
- Breeze.

Niagara Falls over here.

♪ ♪

From the moment
we touched down on the ground,

it was just rain.

[suspenseful music]

♪ ♪

[grunts]

♪ ♪

When it rains,

the likelihood of rockfall
goes way up.

♪ ♪

That's a whole
different level of risk

that I never accounted for.

♪ ♪

Not normal protocol
to climb in the rain.

Oh.

My fucking feet won't even
stay on the holds.

Like, this is like
such mossy bullshit.

I'm not sure how wet
this climb is going to be.

It feels like it's
one of the only options.

Right now.

[rain pattering]

You got that.

Oh, everything's so wet.
Holy smokes.

Sasha is one of the most
driven people I've ever met.

♪ ♪

It helps her achieve the goals
that she sets for herself.

And I do believe that
she finds self-worth

and self-value in those goals
that she creates.

Oh, no!
Fucker!

On the grasp!

No fucking way!

Ah!

[stirring orchestral music]

♪ ♪

[softly]
Yes.

♪ ♪

Yes.

Whoo!

Ow, ow, ow, ow!

Sighs]
First pitch.

But, man, that was a fight
through the mud.

♪ ♪

I just don't know if we're
going to get a weather window.

Well, then I'm probably
not going to go to the top

if we don't get
a weather window.

Yeah, I mean,
it is shitty to be, like,

the only one trying
to, like, push our,

like, momentum forward.

Like I said,
I'm super willing

to go up there with you.

I just, like,
want you to be doing it

for the right reasons, girl.

Like, I want you to--

I'm, like, perfectly aware
of my--my, like, risk-taking.

I just, like, if I feel
like something's sketchy,

I come down.

And my only point is that

we don't know
until we check it out.

[rain pattering]

[thunder rumbling softly]

[insects droning]

[tense ambient music]

♪ ♪

Rock!

You guys okay?

[words echoing]

♪ ♪

Angela!

[Sasha panting]

I'm okay.

A TV-sized block
coming off is, like,

not cool.

There was rockfall that almost
killed our photographer.

And that was a very
high point of tension

because Sasha didn't think
anything had gone wrong

because nobody was hurt.

My life partner of many years

went on an expedition
to Pakistan.

And he never came home.

That dramatically
changed the way

that I see the world
of climbing.

I was bold,
and that's how I got my name.

And now I'm very far
from bold.

[somber music]

I just don't really
want anyone to die.

So no one dies on this route,

it's going to be
a sweet summit.

Somebody dies,
I'm going to be super-bummed.

That's kind of where I'm at.

If you feel like
you going up there

is like you dying,

then of course,
I can't push you.

I just have confidence
that we can reach the top

and that
we can mitigate the risk.

I mean, I don't know what
you want me to say.

[insects droning]

At the end of that evening,
Sasha went into her tent

and uploaded the GoPro footage
to Instagram.

[tense music]

Rock!

♪ ♪

You guys okay?

♪ ♪

Angela!

Last night, my ego
was getting in the way

of making a clear decision.

I woke up this morning feeling
like this is against my ethic

and not the example
I want to set.

What hurts right now is
I feel like

all of the preparation I did,

and as much as
I wanted something,

it's just not possible.

And this is the first--

this is the first mission
of mine,

the first big wall
that I've gone on

on a trip that
I haven't succeeded on.

[engine chugging]

[metallic tapping]

[mechanical whirring]

I was at fault
for the failed expedition

because I was supposed to be

keeping everyone
in good spirit.

I wasn't empathetic
to their feelings.

I wasn't the expedition leader
that they needed me to be.

All right!

We put six bolts in today.

All right, let's try.
Let's go down one more.

It was the first trip that
someone was telling me no,

and, like, I didn't like that.

All right, I'll come down.

Growing up, I wanted
to do everything by myself.

[dramatic energetic music]

I wasn't naturally
that much of a team player.

♪ ♪

For instance,
my mom learned how to belay

so that I could
maximize my time climbing

and do laps.

I was just game to help out
in any way I could.

And that turned into
belaying Sasha

so that she didn't take time
belaying another climber.

She didn't really climb
with anyone else.

It was just her mom.

And so all she did was climb.

Usually when you're climbing,
you have your partner

and you take your breaks,
you know, and you rest.

But for Sasha,
it was just like up and down,

up and down, up and down.

Go, Sasha!

Elite athletes have
to have drive.

You have to be selfish.

Like, you have to be thinking
about how to elevate yourself.

♪ ♪

My mom,
she loved being a part of it.

But my dad,
he was busy working.

Didn't come
to my climbing competitions.

He didn't really
understand climbing.

He was scared that
I would go off

and become a dirtbag
and not go to college.

I wanted to prove to him

that climbing was
a legitimate sport

like tennis and hockey
and that I could make a living

off of this sport
that I loved.

What my dad did connect
with was me winning.

♪ ♪

I could say,
"Here's my gold medal."

And he would beam
with a sense of pride.

Our little tradition was

my dad would bring me
to the airport.

We'd talk about things

that have nothing to do
with climbing.

[soft upbeat music]

And whenever
he dropped me off,

he'd say, "Have fun, be safe,
and do your best."

[audience exclaim]

[applause]

♪ ♪

[wind whooshing]

It's such
a beautiful formation.

For Sasha and I
to do a new route here

would be a great achievement
for us,

but also a gift
to the climbers.

Once we've got it all bolted,
the fun part starts.

That's why I wanted Sasha
to be a part of this,

because we can do something
for the community of Boulder

and all the climbers that are
looking for new routes

about that level of difficulty.

Sasha is a young woman who's
still figuring it out.

My feet are actually
still warm.

We share similar goals when
it comes to climbing.

- We're in climbing shoes.
- Yeah.

Once you decide
to do something,

there's no backing down.

That's just part
of our character,

and it's part of what
makes us good climbers.

But we come from a
completely different culture.

The world is
a lot different today

than it was when
I was her age.

[dreamy upbeat rock music]

Back in the days when I
was climbing the big walls

of Yosemite as, like,
an 18-, 19-year-old,

I met this group of climbers

that are now known
as the Stonemasters.

They were pushing the level
of free climbing in America

and finding the routes
that were harder

than what had already
been done.

It was a very inclusive group,

people from different walks
of life.

And where we were bonded was
in our love for climbing.

My first female
climbing partner,

Mari Gingery, she and I were
pretty much the only women

in this group of men.

♪ ♪

It took a while
for people to understand

that climbing
is actually a sport

and that women can do it.

We do what we think
we're capable of.

So we're
telling ourselves stories,

and the story you tell yourself
is the most important one.

♪ ♪

I was just enjoying
being out there

and hanging out with these
people that like to have fun

and just do crazy things.

It was a really beautiful time
in my life

where I felt free
and on the edge of something

that nobody else really cared,
but we cared.

[rowdy rock music]

Then I was part of the first
generation of climbers

that got to
experience competition.

[audience cheering]

And that was very
controversial at first.

Some climbers on one side
that would say

climbing is not
a competitive sport

and how would we judge who's
the best climber anyway?

The only way I was really
making money was prize money.

When I asked the organizers
if the men and women

were getting paid the same
for prize money,

they just said, "Well,
women will get paid the same

if they climb
without their tops on."

When I retired
from competitions,

I decided to do
one last big climb,

the first free ascent
of the most famous route

in the middle of El Capitan
called the Nose.

People said
it couldn't be done.

And when people say
it can't be done,

that's when
I get most motivated.

Oh, really?
It can't be done?

Who would ever say that?

Why would you ever say
something can't be done?

It's just a matter
of finding the way to do it.

Lynn Hill is a legend
amongst climbers.

This morning, a woman
adventure writer Jon Krakauer

called, quote,
"Not just one of the best

female climbers, but one
of the all-time greats."

The first part says,

"Someday, some guy is going
to free the Nose."

Yeah

And at the bottom,
it says, "It goes, boys."

[laughs]
- That's amazing.

Yeah.

You know that's the poster
of you that I grew up with?

It was signed by you.

Yeah.
- Now, this is really funny.

This photo was taken when
I was probably 19.

So they came out to Joshua Tree
and they're like,

"Who wants to get
some free schwag

and take a few photos with us?"

And so I said, "Sure."

So they gave me
those stand up shorts.

I did get sponsored later,

but I wasn't
making enough money to survive

and be a mother.

I always had
to do a side hustle.

And it just got really tiring

to have to always
be answering to a sponsor,

have a side hustle,
and be a mom.

There's a young Sasha.

"Kids of Climbing."
- Yeah.

- How old were you then?
- 2007.

Because of people like Lynn

who really
pioneered the sport,

my generation gets to actually

make a living doing what
you love.

Oh, my goodness,
Little Sasha.

I want women to have
equal access to equity

and equality in sport.

It's not about the money.

Money enables you freedom,

and freedom enables you
to do what you want to do.

[upbeat music]

I took a very business-forward
approach to my career.

And even from a young age,
I had brand principles

and a mission statement
of who I was.

I remember writing out

the mission statement
of Sasha DiGiulian.

I always looked
at professional climbing

as basically
similar to dumpster diving.

Get in there and see
what you can find.

Sasha was just really good
at diving in the dumpster.

I don't--[laughs]

I said yes to everything.

Tires, makeup brands,
fitness trackers.

Did a deal with Seamless,
which was awesome

because I was in college

and it was like free delivery
for a year.

She's a businesswoman.
She's a self-marketer.

She's the OG millennial
influencer pro climber.

One of the first
people to really

be Insta-famous
in our climbing community

and have a huge following

and be able to leverage
and use that

in ways
that were to her benefit

but also became
extremely isolating.

♪ ♪

Agent Provocateur
approached me

about being a part
of this new campaign,

embracing strength
as not mutually

exclusive from femininity.

It was a fun experience

and one of the most ridiculous
things that I've done.

But I'm, like,
pretty happy that I did it.

Sometimes she's
critiqued by, you know,

the trolls on the internet.

The culture
that I came from,

people didn't boast
about themselves.

There was no social media.

They were very discreet,
and if anything,

understated and humble.

And if you see somebody who's
the opposite of that, you know,

the tendency is to tear
that person down.

I love to climb hard, and
I also love to wear pink.

I love to be outside,
but I also love

to stay in a five-star hotel.

Being true to myself and not
having to dampen my shine

is maybe why I cause friction,

but I'm human,
so I'm always going to be

affected by negative comments.

I have spent a lot of time
anguishing over what

other people think about me.

I went through a really
public cyberbullying incident

that came from a long saga
of someone

in our community mocking,
essentially, me being obese.

And I crafted a post about it.

What resulted in that was fury
towards me and towards him.

I have been dealing
with someone who has treated me

poorly through harassment,
online and offline,

over the last eight years.

And I exposed something
that was posted online.

And my opinion
about social media

is that what is posted
online is posted

to a public forum.

Whether from a public account
or a private account,

we all have to face the
accountability of our actions.

She fought back,

fucking nuked him
on social media.

That person lost
their entire livelihood.

People had a hard time
with that fact,

because it was
a well-loved person

in the climbing community.

Something that Sasha
will always be associated with

and never escape,
but at the same time,

she was right
to stand up for herself.

I'm glad I stood up
for myself.

But I felt like an outsider
within my own community.

[exhales]

The way that I deal
with things is trying

to compartmentalize what
is going on under the surface.

Because my job is to be
a professional climber.

And if I'm not climbing
something of significance

each year, like,
I feel inadequate

and not deserving
of the support that I have.

[exhales]

Seeing pressure as a reason

to hit the gas harder is--

has always been my mentality.

[indistinct chatter]

She has unbelievable goals
that are going to push her

mentally and physically
and push female climbing

and push climbing in general.

She also is very aware of the
fact that she's getting older,

and she's aware
of what transpires

and how brand relationships
transition as you get older

and maybe you become
slightly less relevant.

She is very much
grasping with like, well,

what does it mean if some day
I'm not as relevant?

And I think she's thinking
of all that emotionally,

and I think she's also
thinking about it financially.

I'm in the prime
of my career,

and I want to take advantage
of that as much as possible.

And that's going after
these first female ascents.

When I see a woman
has done a climb,

it all of a sudden connects
the dots that it's like,

oh, wow,
if she did it, I can do it.

And so in a way,
it kind of opens

this floodgate of possibility.

[light music]

♪ ♪

Sao Tome didn't work out,
and I came home

hungry to go
and lead another big wall,

all-female expedition.

And that came in the form
of Logical Progression,

the most badass sport
big wall in the world,

a 3,000-foot face climb
up a monolith

called El Gigante in Mexico.

The route
hadn't been free-climbed

by a woman before.

And all the men
that had done it

were these big names
that I respected,

like Josh Wharton,
Alex Honnold,

Sonnie Trotter,
Hayden Kennedy.

I was dead set on going there
and trying it.

♪ ♪

The Logical Progression
will suit you really well,

because it's, like,
techy vert fingery.

And it's like technical and
sort of meander back and forth.

But overall, I remember
the whole route basically

being small edges up the face.

- Okay, so like--
- You know, like--like,

miles of just creeping up
a vertical wall.

- Climb vertical--
- Yeah.

And then I remember
that the first pitches

is are more thought-provoking
than the rating would imply.

You know, you're like,
"Oh, 11-A, that'll be fast."

And then you get up there,
you're like,

"Where are the holds?"
It's all confusing.

Yeah.

If someone's
a professional climber,

you can kind of tell by
the way they move on a rock.

That's how I judge
a professional climber

is if they can just show up
at the crag and climb well.

Boy.

Sasha definitely has that.

You watch her climb,
and you can tell

that she's really good at it.

[breathing heavily]

I think I'm dying, because my
right hip is really throbbing.

Like, last night, like, I had
to take three Advil at night.

I kind of, like, went cold.

I was like, "I can't go
to Mexico with this.

I need to get
a cortisone shot."

Finally went in,
and it turned out I needed

a total hip reconstruction.

because my femur head
was essentially

popping out of the socket.

It would be a series of five
surgeries over the course

of about a year.

And the surgeon
didn't know if I

would be able
to return to the level

of climbing that I was at.

[somber music]

But since I already had done
all of the damage to my hips,

two weeks wasn't going to make
it necessarily much worse.

So I could go to Mexico,
complete the climb,

and then return for surgery.

I was in a state
of total disarray

and trying to process the
news that I had just gotten

about the potential
career-ending set of surgeries

that I'd have to go through.

So that's--yeah.

And then I got
the call about Nolan.

♪ ♪

Nolan was
a really beloved member

of the community in climbing
and in base jumping.

He had gone ahead to hang
static lines for my team.

♪ ♪

He was climbing the route,

and a major ledge
that he was on broke.

He fell from over 1,000 feet.

[helicopter blades whirring]

We had left Mexico
the next morning.

Nolan's whole family
flew down.

After we recovered
Nolan's body,

we shut the expedition down,
and we all flew home.

I felt extremely lost
and confused and broken.

♪ ♪

[birds chirping]

I had hardly gotten home
from Mexico,

and I went in
for my first hip surgery.

[machine beeping]

[machine beeping]

[saw whirring]

[hammer clacking]

[light music]

♪ ♪

Sasha's tagline was,
you're not the boss of me.

♪ ♪

She said it all the time.

My husband would say something
that she didn't want to do.

She'd say, well, "I'm going
to get a new family."

Such a very tiny little girl.

Sasha?

Oh, she's waking up.

Sasha?

Hey, good morning.

Can you wiggle your toes?

Oh, there we go.
Lift them up.

♪ ♪

Push down with the arms
all the way.

No weight on that leg.

Sasha doesn't like
to not do something well.

And she doesn't like
to be imperfect.

So she'll just do it
and do it and do it.

Surgery number two,
here we go.

Here I had this little kid
going off on weekends

climbing up these mountains.

She gave up her senior prom
to go on a climbing trip.

Like, there was no choice.

Like, "I'm not going to prom."

- Yay.
- Yay.

[exhales]

Watch this, Mom.

Press into this.

I allowed her to do
what she wanted.

I allowed her to go to Europe

with her boyfriend
when she was just 16.

She came back with
another boyfriend too.

It was, like, a Norwegian.

I trusted myself,
and I trusted her.

And I really didn't care
about what anybody else said.

Here we go again.

Love you.

♪ ♪

When she told me
she was planning

on doing Logical Progression,

I wasn't so sure
I really wanted her to,

but Sasha just sets her goals.

And who am I to say
you can't do it

when that's what she wants
to do?

Good.
[laughs]

I could lay on
a whole lot of guilt,

but I'm going to save that
for when I really need it.

♪ ♪

I was really
in an emotional state

after the surgeries
and not really knowing, like,

what life would look like.

I started thinking about
what I could control,

so I started thinking more
about what impact my nutrition

could have on my body
accelerating

through the recovery process.

The deep,
dark undercurrent of climbing

that's the elephant
in the room

to a lot of climbers
and myself included,

is the conversation
about weight.

For group A
with Sasha DiGiulian,

[indistinct].

2010, I was, like,
at the top of my podiums,

and I was 94 pounds.

Being skinny on the wall
meant less weight to pull up

the wall, but it also meant a
future of just health issues

that were unavoidable
if I kept on that track,

what I'm going to eat, how
much food I'm going to eat,

thinking that I needed
to keep losing weight.

[speaking in native language]

The people who are winning
the world cups

were way thinner than I was.

[cheers and applause]

I think there was maybe,
like, a period

where I hadn't seen her in,
like, a year or two,

and I bumped into her.

And I almost didn't
recognize her.

And, you know,
my heart just kind of dropped,

because she just looked

so skinny and not healthy.

As I progressed in my 20s,
I wanted to build my strength

instead of lose weight.

My experience
with malnutrition

led me to really want to learn

a lot more about nutrition.

And it's only really been
over the last few years

that I've felt, like,

really confident
in my own skin.

♪ ♪

I love waking up,
moving my body,

taking part in everyday life.

And when you're injured,
you don't get to do that.

And so it makes you feel
super vulnerable.

I can't really explain
very well

why I'm so inspired
to climb Logical Progression.

It's just a climb
that represents a lot.

It represents
this entire journey

of what I've gone through.

And it represented
this driving force for me

before my injury.

And it represented something
that I wanted to do,

that I was committed to,
that I was training for.

And it's almost like the climb
itself is what separates me

before all of this and me now.

Just by being
on Logical Progression,

I get to confront my fears
head on.

♪ ♪

It's totally insane
for her to be

pursuing a goal like this

on the heels
of five surgeries.

It's beyond dark comedy.

It's kind of like,
"What are we doing here?

"Like, your hips aren't ready.

"You don't have a partner.

Like,
give it a couple months."

- [chuckles]
- Okay.

To have one surgery
where they break her hip

and reconstruct it,
putting in four big screws,

recovered from that,

second hip, same thing,

those are pretty
major operations.

She's an elite athlete,
and I think she probably,

like me, recovers faster
than most people.

Hopefully, I'll be ready
to go to Mexico in April.

You'll see how it goes.

I think it's not bad
to go and look at it

and suss it out
and check it out and,

you know,
do a survey and, like,

maybe climb some pitches.

But I don't expect you
to complete it.

[breathing heavily]

♪ ♪

You know, I went to Boulder,
and I spent time with her,

like, watching her recovery,
and, like,

she was a long ways away

from getting
to the point where

she could do
Logical Progression.

♪ ♪

For the last year,
she's been sitting still

and waiting
and trying to heal.

Like, I know she needs this.

She needs a challenge that's
not just a small challenge.

She needs something that,
like,

is just on the ragged edge
of insanity.

It's binary for her.

Like, this is it.

Like, she's either going
to do this and pull it off

and she's back,
or she's not going to do it,

and these hip surgeries
were the end of her

professional climbing.

Like, it almost feels like
she's that fixated on it.

♪ ♪

Getting on challenging climbs

is good for me,
because then I just get

that fitness and power back.

It's, like, a humbling
experience, I think.

I mean, I'm just so happy
to be back on rock,

but I don't feel my most
in shape or anything like that.

And remembering that I did
go through five surgeries

and a lot of time
off climbing,

like, it's important for me
to remember that.

♪ ♪

Returning to
Logical Progression for me

is how I could get back
and through

this really trying time
in my own life.

♪ ♪

Me, I would have delayed
Mexico a couple of months.

I've never made her decisions.

She knows when she's ready.

If she says she's ready,
she's ready.

Sasha called me to ask me to
be a part of this expedition

to Logical Progression.

The problem was,
I wasn't really thinking

about climbing at that level.

It could have been
a great adventure

but just wasn't the time
for me.

Nice.

I knew Sasha
was disappointed,

but I had to follow
my instincts.

I feel like we've got
everything in place.

And yeah, if you have a
last-minute change of heart--

Okay, I'm going.

Yeah, you're like,
"Guys, wait."

[laughter]

[light music]

♪ ♪

[indistinct chatter]

Dude,
less than two weeks out.

We can find
another spot, right?

So, Vian,
you want to go first?

No, you can go first
if you want.

You're tying in.
You go.

I know, but you want to go?

Vian's a badass climber.

And I've known her
for over ten years.

And we met when she stole
my Swedish Fish at the crag.

You just have to tell
everybody that,

like I'm a Swedish Fish thief
or something.

It was one time.

I never did it again.

[laughs]

11, including--

Vian said she could
maybe make Mexico work.

You're actually, like, the
first person that when I said,

like, anything about
Mexico that's actually

expressed enthusiasm
around going.

But I'm down.

[laughs]

We'll be safe.
Okay, I got to get going.

- Okay.
- You clipping this?

You want a stick clip?

But I have one too.

We're talking about, like,
weeks away

from this expedition.

And I come back from work,
and she's like,

"Vian wants to go."

And I'm like, "Who is Vian?"

I've never even heard of Vian.

I mean, as I understand it,
like,

Vian hasn't done
a big wall before.

The first time I met anybody,
like, "famous,"

it was actually Sasha.

And I just, like,
went up and introduced myself.

I was like, "Hi, I'm Vian."

And, like,
we hit it off really well,

and we were both climbing
in the Pipe Dream a lot,

and we were just, like,
good friends after that.

But yeah, I don't know
what really inspires me.

I can't say for sure,
like, why I climb, like,

there's some grand thing
behind it.

I'm just kind of compelled.

♪ ♪

I never had the ambition
to be a professional climber,

and I would never
want to be famous.

I would not be able
to put on a happy face

if I had to go to a crag and
there were ten people there

who knew who I was
and expected me to climb

really hard
and take photos with them.

I think Sasha's handled fame
with a lot of grace and class.

She's a really public figure,
and so a lot of shade

gets thrown her way.

I told Sasha, heavy is the
head that wears the crown.

[gentle music]

♪ ♪

I was stubborn, independent.

I guess it's just
the way that I am.

♪ ♪

I think I got a lot
of my ability to not see no

as an option from my dad.

♪ ♪

Was always, "See the light
at the end of the tunnel,

and that's the option that
you're going to arrive at."

There's going to be roadblocks
along the way,

but it's always going to be
leading towards this goal.

And then it's, by any means
possible, achieve it.

♪ ♪

When I was 22,
my dad took me to the airport

to fly to Wyoming,
our little tradition.

♪ ♪

I was climbing in Wyoming,

and my mom called me
to tell me

that my dad had had a stroke.

♪ ♪

I flew back immediately,
was there in the hospital.

♪ ♪

And we were asking all these
questions about what his state

would be when he woke up,
and the surgeon was like,

"You're not asking
the right questions."

He never woke up.

♪ ♪

I mean, I felt the most gutted
that I have felt in my life.

My response was just
to suppress all my feelings

and just keep going, because
that's what I knew how to do.

The first time I met Sasha,
she had just lost her father,

and she gave a presentation
that was so, like, together.

Like,
she didn't cry or anything.

And it just made me think,
"Wow, she's really good

"at compartmentalizing
her emotions

and setting that
off to the side,"

which you do have to do
on a scary route sometimes.

You have to just say,
"Okay, I'm really scared,

but I can't focus on that."

[birds chirping]

- What's up, dude?
- What's up?

Dude,
we're going to Mexico today.

Yeah.

Okay, I'm going to--

I'll be in--

I'll go get the bars too.
- Okay.

Feel free
to come inside whenever.

Come on, Moose.

Wednesday,
we arrive to Chihuahua.

Thursday, we drive
from Chihuahua to Basaseachi.

Friday, we drive to the top of
the wall and rapp down to here.

Down to the bottom.

I was really excited
to do a big wall.

I had never been
on a big wall before.

I thought 300 bolts,
portaledge, no problem.

I'd known Vian
for about a decade.

She climbs super hard,
and she's been an incredibly

supportive and loyal friend.

And so I was excited
by the idea

of getting to know her better

and going on
this big adventure with her.

Oh,
she's got something equivalent.

Sasha's never been
in this much pain.

She's never been
in a situation

where she's this out of shape
before a climb.

And seeing this audacious goal
that she's thrown on herself,

it's just scary.

And I think everyone
that loves her is terrified.

[tense music]

She needs to go prove
to herself that she's still

a professional climber,
that this injury hasn't

ripped away her identity.

I don't know where you click
into that drive and that fire,

but she has it,
and she clicks into it.

It's why she is who she is.

♪ ♪

Why I do what I do?

That's a big question.

♪ ♪

I think that proving a goal,
that's what drives me.

♪ ♪

I'm nervous for the rappel
more than the climb

right now, because that's
what's the first thing to do,

and it's a lot of weight.

It's, like, maybe more weight
than I'm used to rapping with.

You got this.

Thanks, Vian.

Mm-hmm.

Achieving something
eats away at me.

Like, that's the way
that I approach my life.

Yeah.

The death of my hips.

Ohh.

Ow, my fingers.

I hate this bag.

We've officially started
the descent down.

We all have
pretty heavy haul bags.

And yeah, it's pretty
phenomenal being here.

[light music]

♪ ♪

The hips are so sore.

That's pretty.

- Yeah.
- Do you copy?

After a night of no sleep,
we're racking up to rapp down

these first eight pitches.

♪ ♪

Made it to the bottom.

We're at the bottom.

Do you want to go first,
or should I?

Whatever.
Want to Roshambo for it?

Yeah.

Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.

I go first.

♪ ♪

Top of the second,
pulling Vian up.

There she is.

This is what's ahead of us.

♪ ♪

We'll see how it goes.

♪ ♪

We are here sitting
forever in the sun.

There's the sun.

Ow.

That hurt your eyes, didn't it?
You weren't expecting that.

You two would have been
like fried chicken.

It was definitely
really hot.

The sun is just baking,
and the rock temperature

just goes way up.

And it's just a lot harder
when the rock temperature

is a lot higher.

And it's so hot right now.

[tense music]

♪ ♪

Come on,
work that right foot in.

Come on, Digi, come on.

♪ ♪

Ahh!

Oh, shit.

Fuck.
- All right.

♪ ♪

Right foot high.

[exhales]

[groans]

♪ ♪

I see the next draw.

[exhales]

♪ ♪

[breathing heavily]

Okay. All right.

[exhales]

Okay.

♪ ♪

[indistinct].

Whoo!

I'm at the anchor.

Nice job.

Oh, my God.

I'm, like, shaking.

That's probably as hard
as I've ever seen her try.

And it just showed
to me how, like,

how fragile she was or how much
she just wanted this,

how badly she wanted this,
you know,

and for some people,
it's just, like,

it's just a climb,
you know.

It's okay to say-- to stop,
you know?

You know, you just-- you just
had surgery not that long ago.

It's, like, maybe it was too--

too early.

You know, but for Sasha,
she just really needed this.

What made you keep going?

I think I just--

I literally just could think
right foot,

right hand,
left foot, left hand.

Like, I couldn't think
of anything else.

And then I was like,
you made it through the crux.

Like, just keep it together.

It'll be one less pitch
for tomorrow.

[birds chirping]

Day three, we don't know
whose spoon this is.

That's all.

I wasn't trying to, like--

Day three, I don't know
whose spoon this is.

I wasn't trying to make
you feel bad or anything.

That'd be my spoon,
but we can share.

Sharing is caring.

Man, I'm, like,
triple-fisting.

I got my dirty Chai
with collagen,

my trail mix, and my Red Bull.

Mm-hmm.

And Kevin's over there
taking a shit.

Kevin?

We're just one big,
happy family.

[light music]

After my surgeries,
I lost touch with who I was.

♪ ♪

And I lost touch with what it
even feels like to succeed.

During the whole time
of being injured,

I didn't have
any feeling of success.

♪ ♪

You got it.

Left hand up.

I put my right foot high.

Yeah.

[indistinct].

Two finger,
get your right foot up.

♪ ♪

We got into a situation
where we had to climb

a little bit at night.

And we went into the area
where Nolan had his accident.

And I know Sasha didn't want
to climb

that pitch in the dark.

It was pretty scary.

I just passed Nolan's
rock scar where the rock broke.

It's pretty visible,
but I couldn't see

what happened with the bolt.

My guess would be
that really big rock

picked off and cut his rope.

It was really scary,
because as I was passing that,

my headlamp flashed
that it was dying.

♪ ♪

Nolan didn't make
any mistakes,

yet he died climbing.

It affected me
in a really heavy way,

because everything
was done right.

♪ ♪

So many nights
of not sleeping is killing me.

I think I was in the harness
for 20 hours.

We've got three more
really long 5.12 pitches

that we need to do tomorrow
to then kind of

be back in the running to feel
like the rest of this route

is possible on free.

I went left foot pocket.

Yeah.

Augh! God!

That's a really hard
transition.

It's hard.

Nice.

[grunts]

Good job.

Fuck, yeah.

Hell, yeah.

Good job.

- Pitch 13.
- Done.

[chuckles]

[laughs]

Strenuous 45 minutes.

Holy guacamole.

Ohh.

Another pitch bites the dust.

So we've officially
crossed this side.

Now we're coming up
to finger to fist, route 17.

Going to--

[grunting]

Oh, yeah, we're going
to do the Spread Eagle.

Augh!

[laughs]

Ahh!

Augh.

That was a serious crag.

Augh!

[laughs]

Yeah, girl.

Augh!

Yes, sun.

Whoo.

Yeah. Okay.

That's it.
- Whoo!

Whoo!

Pow!

You're a good lead.

Thanks.

Move.

Am I in your face
with my butt?

Oh!

Jesus.

That thing did look good.

Sure wasn't, though.

[tense music]

♪ ♪

Just a little choss left.

I'm trying, Mom.

[laughs]

Got your spot.

I actually just did.

I think it saved you.

♪ ♪

Stay with it.

You got it.

[breathing heavily]

Nice, Sasha.

Come on.

Ahh! Fuck.

Nothing broke.

Nothing.

So much stuff broke.

It's so hard there.

Try that again.

Okay.

Ahh!

Such a big move.

Yeah.

Holy shit.

Yeah.

♪ ♪

Man, I thought I could
get that last pitch.

Such a bummer.

If it sticks once,
it won't be as good.

So start in the back
and then end in the back.

I'm just like
your personal assistant here.

[laughs]

No, I said,
you're my best friend.

- Okay.
- Short of Moose.

You tell that to all
your climbing partners.

I don't have
climbing partners.

When I met her
in 2011 when she was 16,

she was very much
a protected kid.

♪ ♪

But now Sasha is so strong,
and she's capable of anything.

♪ ♪

And I'll just climb over here.

♪ ♪

After my dad died,

I recognized that you're
mourning this space

that they left behind.

And that space
that they leave behind is--

it's really painful
to think about, like,

it never being filled again.

That space is what
I keep trying to fill.

[inspirational music]

♪ ♪

We did it.

♪ ♪

It's kind of crazy.

I didn't even know
if I'd be climbing again

when I went in
for all those surgeries.

I really didn't.

I didn't know what to expect.

[chuckles]

[sobbing]

[light music]

♪ ♪

Climbing's opened
a lot of doors for me

to go down this journey...

♪ ♪

But also to realize that
a lot of satisfaction

and joy that I get
out of life

doesn't need to always come

from the physical sense
of sending.

And my path forward
doesn't necessarily center

around climbing.

♪ A million little knives ♪

♪ Carve out your name ♪

[all shouting]

♪ In the small of my back ♪

I needed to learn
purpose beyond a wall.

And I think that that does
come with a sense of security.

And I would argue
that it comes with a sense

of career and sense of home.

♪ ♪

I didn't want to tell
the City of Boulder

that we're done,
because I just want

to be complete
with the whole project.

- Yeah.
- And at that point,

we can address this issue
of possibly changing the name,

because they have it registered
as Vamos Chicas.

And Queen Line
might be a better name

just because
it's on the maiden.

And it is the best line,
I think,

on that whole formation.

And you always hear
King Line.

- Yeah.
- Why not Queen Line?

Or, like, the queen.

The queen, the queens.

The queens.

Yeah, I like it, Queen Line.

I think it's a perfect name.

[light music]

♪ ♪

This is the day.
We're going to do it.

Let's go.
The queen on the line.

Ladies and gentlemen,
the first pitch.

Here we go.

♪ ♪

Lynn's shown to me
how to age gracefully

within the sport
and still be involved

and still be a steward
of the community

and be out there pushing
new lines

and supporting climbers.

♪ ♪

Sasha has a chance
to really look at periods

of life and what her
actual goals are..

♪ ♪

What she wants to do,
not what's expected of her,

but what she wants to do,
what makes her happy.

♪ ♪

She's young
and still ambitious

and wanting to do more
and more.

At 30,
she's still got a lot of time

to do a lot of really
amazing things.

♪ ♪

We each have
that thing that drives us.

And that thing
that drives us,

that passion is what I feel
really strongly about

harnessing and embracing and nurturing.

And that's more important
than any summit,

than any achievement.

♪ ♪

[Weval's "Days"]

♪ ♪

♪ No, no, no, no, no ♪

♪ And I will never be ♪

♪ And I will never see ♪

♪ And every choice I make ♪

♪ Consequences negative ♪

♪ Battle zone is known to me ♪

♪ And you to me ♪

♪ Most important feel, feel ♪

♪ ♪

♪ No, no, no, no, no, ♪

♪ No no, no, no,
no no, no, no, no ♪

[bright tone]