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1
00:00:07,441 --> 00:00:08,609
MAIL'S HERE.
2
00:00:08,642 --> 00:00:10,044
AH, THE MAIL.
3
00:00:10,078 --> 00:00:12,813
WHAT WOULD A DAY
ON EARTH BE LIKE
WITHOUT THE MAIL?
4
00:00:12,846 --> 00:00:14,182
PROBABLY A LOT
LIKE SUNDAY.
5
00:00:14,215 --> 00:00:15,649
AH! HA HA.
6
00:00:15,683 --> 00:00:17,085
"SALLY SOLOMON,
7
00:00:17,118 --> 00:00:19,820
"YOU HAVE BEEN PREAPPROVED
FOR A PLATINUM CREDIT CARD.
8
00:00:19,853 --> 00:00:24,758
ONLY OUR MOST VALUED AND
CHERISHED CUSTOMERS QUALIFY
FOR PLATINUM STATUS."
9
00:00:24,792 --> 00:00:26,860
YOU GUYS, I QUALIFY
FOR PLATINUM STATUS!
10
00:00:26,894 --> 00:00:29,330
SO DID I!
ME TOO!
11
00:00:29,363 --> 00:00:30,431
HELLO, FAMILY.
12
00:00:30,464 --> 00:00:31,599
HEY, MAIL'S HERE.
13
00:00:31,632 --> 00:00:33,234
AH, THE MAIL.
14
00:00:33,267 --> 00:00:37,071
WHAT WOULD A DAY
ON EARTH BE LIKE
WITHOUT THE MAIL?
15
00:00:37,105 --> 00:00:40,274
PROBABLY A LOT
LIKE SUNDAY.
16
00:00:40,308 --> 00:00:41,309
YOU KNOW, THAT'S
VERY CLEVER. HARRY.
17
00:00:41,342 --> 00:00:42,910
UH, WAIT. I SAID THAT.
18
00:00:42,943 --> 00:00:44,778
OH, REALLY?
19
00:00:44,812 --> 00:00:47,748
HOW SAD.
20
00:00:47,781 --> 00:00:51,051
OH, THIS ONE'S ADDRESSED
TO "MR. RICHARD SOLOMON."
21
00:00:51,085 --> 00:00:53,687
MY, HOW FORMAL.
22
00:00:53,721 --> 00:00:54,822
"DEAREST RICHARD,
23
00:00:54,855 --> 00:00:57,158
"I HOPE WITH ALL OF MY HEART
THAT THIS LETTER FINDS YOU.
24
00:00:57,191 --> 00:00:59,793
"TOO MANY YEARS
HAVE GONE BY.
WE MISS YOU GREATLY.
25
00:00:59,827 --> 00:01:02,496
"PLEASE COME TO THE SOLOMON
FAMILY REUNION THIS YEAR.
26
00:01:02,530 --> 00:01:05,065
ALL OF MY LOVE,
AUNT FLORENCE."
27
00:01:05,099 --> 00:01:06,434
DICK, YOU NEVER
TOLD US
28
00:01:06,467 --> 00:01:07,801
YOU HAD
AN AUNT FLORENCE.
29
00:01:07,835 --> 00:01:09,002
HE DOESN'T, YOU MOOK.
30
00:01:09,036 --> 00:01:10,438
THAT LETTER WAS
OBVIOUSLY MEANT
31
00:01:10,471 --> 00:01:11,605
FOR SOME OTHER
DICK SOLOMON.
32
00:01:11,639 --> 00:01:13,641
WELL, I'LL JUST CALL UP
THIS AUNT FLORENCE
33
00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:15,309
AND SET HER STRAIGHT.
34
00:01:15,343 --> 00:01:16,944
GREAT SCOTT!
35
00:01:16,977 --> 00:01:19,213
I'VE QUALIFIED FOR
PLATINUM STATUS!
36
00:01:57,418 --> 00:02:00,087
YES, HELLO.
IS THIS FLORENCE SOLOMON?
37
00:02:00,120 --> 00:02:02,190
HI, MY NAME IS DICK SOLOMON.
38
00:02:02,223 --> 00:02:07,828
I-I'VE GOT THIS, UH,
INVITATION TO A FAMILY
REUNION, AND I--
39
00:02:07,861 --> 00:02:12,300
WELL, YES, IT'S NICE TO HEAR
YOUR VOICE, TOO, BUT--
40
00:02:12,333 --> 00:02:15,102
YES, I AM AS ADORABLE
AS I ALWAYS WAS.
41
00:02:17,571 --> 00:02:19,507
HAS IT REALLY BEEN 43 YEARS?
42
00:02:22,142 --> 00:02:24,845
THEN, IF I DID TURN UP,
43
00:02:24,878 --> 00:02:28,716
YOU PROBABLY WOULDN'T EVEN
RECOGNIZE ME, HUH?
44
00:02:28,749 --> 00:02:30,083
THAT'S--
45
00:02:30,117 --> 00:02:34,988
YES, IT WOULD BE WONDERFUL
TO SEE THE FAMILY AGAIN,
AUNT FLORENCE.
46
00:02:35,022 --> 00:02:37,124
I LOVE YOU, TOO.
47
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:38,392
YES...
48
00:02:38,426 --> 00:02:39,827
YES. BYE-BYE.
49
00:02:41,395 --> 00:02:43,664
I HAVE
AN AUNT FLORENCE.
50
00:02:43,697 --> 00:02:44,632
WHAT?
51
00:02:44,665 --> 00:02:47,268
WHAT? OH, THAT WAS
AUNT FLORENCE
IN INDIANA.
52
00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:49,803
SINCE WHEN DO YOU HAVE
AN AUNT FLORENCE IN INDIANA?
53
00:02:49,837 --> 00:02:52,606
SINCE WHEN DO YOU HAVE
AN AUNT FLORENCE
IN INDIANA?
54
00:02:52,640 --> 00:02:53,307
I DON'T.
55
00:02:53,341 --> 00:02:54,808
SO WHERE'S THE BIG
COINCIDENCE?
56
00:02:54,842 --> 00:02:58,446
YOU KNOW, SOMETIMES,
NINA, YOU MAKE NO SENSE.
57
00:02:58,479 --> 00:02:59,347
ARE YOU GONNA
VISIT HER?
58
00:02:59,380 --> 00:03:01,282
WE HAVE A FAMILY REUNION
THIS WEEKEND.
59
00:03:01,315 --> 00:03:03,984
IT SOUNDS LIKE IT'S GONNA BE
WONDERFUL. YOU WANNA COME?
60
00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:05,253
ARE YOU SURE
IT'S ALL RIGHT?
61
00:03:05,286 --> 00:03:06,654
WELL, OF COURSE
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
62
00:03:06,687 --> 00:03:07,721
OH, DICK, IT'S FAMILY, I--
63
00:03:07,755 --> 00:03:09,323
NO, DON'T WORRY,
MARY.
64
00:03:09,357 --> 00:03:10,958
I'M SURE YOU'LL FIND
MY FAMILY
65
00:03:10,991 --> 00:03:13,527
TO BE WARM
AND NURTURING.
66
00:03:13,561 --> 00:03:14,662
IT WON'T BEAR
ANY RESEMBLANCE
67
00:03:14,695 --> 00:03:17,565
TO THE LIQUOR-DRENCHED
ORGY OF HATRED
AND RECRIMINATION
68
00:03:17,598 --> 00:03:20,701
THAT MARKS EVERY
ALBRIGHT GET-TOGETHER.
69
00:03:26,807 --> 00:03:29,410
SALLY, WE'RE NOT SPENDING
THE WHOLE WINTER
AT THIS REUNION.
70
00:03:29,443 --> 00:03:31,312
BACK OFF, ALL RIGHT?
I'M NOT LIKE YOU GUYS.
71
00:03:31,345 --> 00:03:34,214
I CAN'T JUST THROW IN
A TOOTHBRUSH AND
A PAIR OF UNDERWEAR
72
00:03:34,248 --> 00:03:37,117
AND BE SET FOR THE WEEKEND.
73
00:03:37,150 --> 00:03:38,819
UNDERWEAR!
74
00:03:42,423 --> 00:03:45,125
WELL, IS EVERYBODY
READY TO GO TO
OUR FAMILY REUNION?
75
00:03:45,158 --> 00:03:47,795
DICK, THIS IS NOT
OUR FAMILY.
76
00:03:47,828 --> 00:03:49,363
YEAH, WHAT IF THEY
START ASKING QUESTIONS?
77
00:03:49,397 --> 00:03:50,898
YEAH.
WELL, THAT'S
THE BEAUTY OF THIS.
78
00:03:50,931 --> 00:03:53,634
AUNT FLORENCE
HASN'T SEEN RICHARD
SINCE HE WAS 5 YEARS OLD.
79
00:03:53,667 --> 00:03:54,602
FOR ALL THEY KNOW,
I'M HIM.
80
00:03:54,635 --> 00:03:55,836
WELL, AS A TEENAGER,
81
00:03:55,869 --> 00:03:59,340
THE IDEA OF GOING
TO A FAMILY REUNION
SICKENS ME TO MY CORE.
82
00:03:59,373 --> 00:04:01,141
TOMMY, UH...
83
00:04:01,174 --> 00:04:03,210
WE'VE BEEN HERE ON EARTH
FOR ALMOST 3 YEARS,
84
00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:06,614
AND WE STILL LACK SOMETHING
THAT'S SO IMPORTANT TO US--
85
00:04:06,647 --> 00:04:08,849
ROOTS. A CONNECTION.
86
00:04:08,882 --> 00:04:10,618
LIFE HERE IS NOT JUST ABOUT
WHERE WE'RE GOING,
87
00:04:10,651 --> 00:04:12,786
IT'S ABOUT WHERE
WE'VE COME FROM.
88
00:04:12,820 --> 00:04:14,121
NOW WE'D BETTER GET
ON THE ROAD.
89
00:04:14,154 --> 00:04:16,457
YOU KNOW HOW
AUNT FLORENCE HATES IT
WHEN WE'RE LATE.
90
00:04:23,163 --> 00:04:24,532
[DING-DONG]
91
00:04:27,167 --> 00:04:27,701
AUNT FLORENCE?
92
00:04:27,735 --> 00:04:28,536
YES?
93
00:04:28,569 --> 00:04:29,970
IT'S ME. RICHARD.
94
00:04:30,003 --> 00:04:31,271
RICHARD?
95
00:04:31,305 --> 00:04:34,274
OH, MY GOODNESS!
IT IS YOU!
96
00:04:34,308 --> 00:04:35,943
ABE! IT'S RICHARD!
97
00:04:35,976 --> 00:04:37,711
WELL, I'LL BE
DAMNED! HA HA!
98
00:04:37,745 --> 00:04:40,614
HA HA HA!
WELL, WELCOME BACK!
99
00:04:40,648 --> 00:04:42,082
AND WHO ARE ALL THESE
LOVELY PEOPLE?
100
00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:45,619
WELL, THIS IS MY SISTER,
YOUR NIECE SALLY.
101
00:04:45,653 --> 00:04:48,556
AND THIS IS MY SON,
YOUR GRANDNEPHEW TOMMY.
102
00:04:48,589 --> 00:04:51,359
AND THIS IS MY BROTHER,
YOUR NEPHEW HARRY.
103
00:04:51,392 --> 00:04:53,293
YAAH! HARRY!
104
00:04:54,428 --> 00:04:56,997
AND THIS LITTLE HOTTIE
IS MY GIRLFRIEND MARY.
105
00:04:57,030 --> 00:04:59,800
NICE TO MEET YOU,
FLORENCE.
106
00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:01,369
RICHARD, COME GREET
THE FAMILY.
107
00:05:01,402 --> 00:05:02,503
THEY CAN'T WAIT
TO SEE YOU.
108
00:05:02,536 --> 00:05:06,574
OH, I CAN'T WAIT
TO SEE THEM.
109
00:05:06,607 --> 00:05:09,009
UH, WELL, WE BROUGHT YOU THIS.
110
00:05:09,042 --> 00:05:10,844
IT GOES GREAT WITH STEAK.
111
00:05:10,878 --> 00:05:14,715
AT LEAST IT DID LAST NIGHT.
112
00:05:14,748 --> 00:05:15,949
YOU CHEAP BASTARD,
113
00:05:15,983 --> 00:05:18,151
YOU'LL FIT RIGHT IN
AROUND HERE.
114
00:05:18,185 --> 00:05:19,319
BUNCH OF TIGHTWADS?
115
00:05:19,353 --> 00:05:22,055
TIGHTWADS? DON'T
EVEN GET ME STARTED
WITH THIS FAMILY.
116
00:05:22,089 --> 00:05:22,856
COME HERE.
117
00:05:22,890 --> 00:05:25,559
IT'S ME,
RICHARD!
118
00:05:25,593 --> 00:05:28,429
OH, IT'S ME, RICHARD!
119
00:05:28,462 --> 00:05:29,763
OH, THIS IS SO GREAT.
120
00:05:29,797 --> 00:05:30,998
I JUST OPENED MY ARMS,
121
00:05:31,031 --> 00:05:34,502
AND I'M HUGGED AND KISSED
AND PINCHED BY ALL SORTS
OF PEOPLE.
122
00:05:34,535 --> 00:05:36,837
THERE ISN'T EVEN
A COVER CHARGE.
123
00:05:36,870 --> 00:05:39,139
WE'RE FAMILY,
RICHARD!
124
00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:42,242
FAMILY.
IT'S ME, RICHARD!
125
00:05:42,275 --> 00:05:45,245
OH, IT DOES
MY HEART GOOD
TO SEE HIM BACK.
126
00:05:45,278 --> 00:05:47,848
IT'S FUNNY. HE NEVER
MENTIONED ANY OF YOU.
127
00:05:47,881 --> 00:05:49,016
WELL, GIVEN
ALL THE TROUBLES,
128
00:05:49,049 --> 00:05:51,351
I NEVER THOUGHT
I'D SEE HIM HERE AGAIN.
129
00:05:52,986 --> 00:05:54,688
WHAT TROUBLES?
130
00:05:58,158 --> 00:06:00,060
HI.
131
00:06:00,093 --> 00:06:01,862
HEY.
132
00:06:01,895 --> 00:06:03,263
HEY.
133
00:06:05,866 --> 00:06:07,835
THAT'S A GREAT TOP.
134
00:06:07,868 --> 00:06:09,437
YOU THINK SO?
135
00:06:09,470 --> 00:06:11,204
I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO WEAR.
136
00:06:11,238 --> 00:06:12,473
OH, NO, IT'S--
IT'S PERFECT.
137
00:06:12,506 --> 00:06:14,842
OH, THANKS. I LIVE
WITH A BUNCH OF MEN,
138
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:15,943
AND THEY WERE NO HELP
AT ALL.
139
00:06:15,976 --> 00:06:17,377
YEAH. HA HA.
140
00:06:17,411 --> 00:06:19,146
HEY, I'M MICHELLE,
MARTHA'S DAUGHTER.
141
00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:21,582
OH, HI, I'M SALLY,
RICHARD'S SISTER.
142
00:06:21,615 --> 00:06:23,383
NICE TO MEET YOU.
YOU, TOO.
143
00:06:23,417 --> 00:06:24,685
HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT?
144
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:27,220
MY SWEATER WOULD GO
SO GREAT WITH THAT TOP.
145
00:06:27,254 --> 00:06:28,422
OH, YOU WANNA TRY IT ON?
146
00:06:28,456 --> 00:06:30,724
SURE.
147
00:06:30,758 --> 00:06:32,993
OH, YEAH.
DEFINITELY HIP.
148
00:06:33,026 --> 00:06:34,895
COOL. HA HA.
149
00:06:34,928 --> 00:06:37,130
HEY, YOU WANNA
WEAR MY SHOES?
150
00:06:37,164 --> 00:06:40,968
I'VE GOT A PAIR OF SOCKS
I'M NOT USING. I'LL GO GET 'EM.
151
00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:52,613
IT'S, UH, POT ROAST.
152
00:06:52,646 --> 00:06:54,682
OH, WOW.
I WAS WAY OFF.
153
00:06:57,585 --> 00:06:59,152
HI. I'M JANINE.
154
00:06:59,186 --> 00:07:01,321
I'M TOMMY.
155
00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:02,490
SO...
156
00:07:02,523 --> 00:07:03,924
[BORED]
THIS IS PRETTY FUN, HUH?
157
00:07:03,957 --> 00:07:05,292
OH, YEAH.
158
00:07:05,325 --> 00:07:06,794
HEY? YOU WANNA
GET OUTTA HERE?
159
00:07:06,827 --> 00:07:09,162
OH, YEAH.
COME ON.
160
00:07:09,196 --> 00:07:11,465
Aunt Sylvia: AUDREY MADE
HER FAMOUS AMBROSIA.
161
00:07:11,499 --> 00:07:15,335
YOU BETTER HURRY,
IT'S GONNA GO.
162
00:07:15,368 --> 00:07:17,137
SWEET WOMAN,
THAT SYLVIA.
163
00:07:17,170 --> 00:07:19,607
YEAH, SWEET.
BUT DUMB
AS A DOORKNOB.
164
00:07:21,108 --> 00:07:23,511
AND DON'T EVEN
GET ME STARTED
WITH HER KIDS.
165
00:07:23,544 --> 00:07:25,679
MMM. ROCKET SCIENTISTS,
HUH?
166
00:07:25,713 --> 00:07:27,414
OHH, YOU GOT IT, PAL.
167
00:07:27,447 --> 00:07:31,018
WELL, DOORKNOBS
BEGET DOORKNOBS.
168
00:07:34,421 --> 00:07:36,857
[HACKING IN UNISON]
169
00:07:37,390 --> 00:07:40,594
IT'S ME, RICHARD!
170
00:07:40,628 --> 00:07:41,562
FELLAS...
171
00:07:41,595 --> 00:07:45,298
IT'S ME, RICHARD!
172
00:07:45,332 --> 00:07:47,501
OH, YOU'RE NOT HUGGERS.
I UNDERSTAND.
173
00:07:47,535 --> 00:07:49,537
RICHARD, I DON'T SUPPOSE
YOU REMEMBER ME.
174
00:07:49,570 --> 00:07:51,104
I'M YOUR COUSIN JACOB.
175
00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:53,073
JACOB, OF COURSE.
IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME.
176
00:07:53,106 --> 00:07:55,676
IT CERTAINLY HAS,
DONUTS.
177
00:07:55,709 --> 00:07:57,377
DONUTS?
178
00:07:57,410 --> 00:07:58,546
WAS THAT
MY NICKNAME?
179
00:07:58,579 --> 00:08:00,013
SURE.
DON'T YOU REMEMBER?
180
00:08:00,047 --> 00:08:01,649
I WAS DUTCH,
AND YOU WERE DONUTS.
181
00:08:01,682 --> 00:08:02,482
DONUTS?
182
00:08:02,516 --> 00:08:05,653
THIS GUY ONCE ATE
2 DOZEN DOUGHNUTS...
183
00:08:05,686 --> 00:08:09,557
AND PUKED 'EM UP ON
GRANDMA LILLIAN'S WIG.
184
00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:10,457
DONUTS.
185
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,025
SAY, YOU'RE RUNNING
ON EMPTY THERE, DICK.
186
00:08:12,059 --> 00:08:13,260
LET ME, UH,
GET YOU A DRINK.
187
00:08:13,293 --> 00:08:14,995
SOUNDS GOOD.
FELLAS,
188
00:08:15,028 --> 00:08:17,731
LAST CHANCE
FOR HUGS.
189
00:08:17,765 --> 00:08:20,133
OK. CATCH YOU LATER.
190
00:08:20,167 --> 00:08:21,735
SO, DICK,
191
00:08:21,769 --> 00:08:23,036
IT'S BEEN A WHILE.
192
00:08:23,070 --> 00:08:25,338
I WOULD'VE COME SOONER
IF I'D KNOWN WHAT I
WAS MISSING.
193
00:08:25,372 --> 00:08:28,508
I'LL BET YOU WOULD'VE.
194
00:08:28,542 --> 00:08:30,510
WE'VE DONE ALL RIGHT
SINCE YOU'VE BEEN AWAY,
HAVEN'T WE?
195
00:08:30,544 --> 00:08:32,913
OH, AND I'VE NEVER SEEN
SO MANY KINDS OF DIP.
196
00:08:35,549 --> 00:08:37,117
COME ON, COUSIN.
197
00:08:37,150 --> 00:08:38,852
YOU CAN BE STRAIGHT WITH ME.
198
00:08:38,886 --> 00:08:42,089
WHAT REALLY
BRINGS YOU BACK HERE
AFTER ALL THIS TIME?
199
00:08:42,122 --> 00:08:44,792
I CAME TO MEET
MY FAMILY.
200
00:08:44,825 --> 00:08:46,827
RIGHT.
201
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:50,330
BOY, YOU ARE SOME
PIECE OF WORK, DICK.
202
00:08:50,363 --> 00:08:51,965
WAIT. UH...
203
00:08:51,999 --> 00:08:53,701
WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
DUTCH?
204
00:08:53,734 --> 00:08:57,037
IT'S ME, DONUTS!
205
00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:59,472
HE TOLD YOU GUYS
NOT TO HUG ME,
DIDN'T HE?
206
00:09:01,208 --> 00:09:02,342
SO, SALLY, YOU HAVE
A BOYFRIEND?
207
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:04,044
YES, I DO, MICHELLE.
208
00:09:04,077 --> 00:09:05,579
HIS NAME IS DON,
209
00:09:05,613 --> 00:09:06,647
AND HE'S A COP.
210
00:09:06,680 --> 00:09:08,248
OH, COPS ARE SO HOT.
211
00:09:08,281 --> 00:09:09,416
OH, YEAH,
TELL ME ABOUT IT.
212
00:09:09,449 --> 00:09:12,152
AND I GOT ME
THE HOTTEST ONE.
213
00:09:12,185 --> 00:09:14,354
HEY, CHECK HIM OUT.
214
00:09:21,028 --> 00:09:25,465
HANDS OFF, HON.
HE'S MINE.
215
00:09:25,498 --> 00:09:28,969
YEAH, WELL, MY BOYFRIEND
JUST WORKS IN A CAFETERIA.
216
00:09:29,002 --> 00:09:32,606
HOLD UP. DOES HE WEAR ONE OF
THOSE COOL CAFETERIA UNIFORMS?
217
00:09:32,640 --> 00:09:35,542
YEAH.
AND AREN'T
UNIFORMS SEXY?
218
00:09:35,575 --> 00:09:36,409
WELL, YEAH.
219
00:09:36,443 --> 00:09:38,011
ALL RIGHT THEN!
220
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:43,550
OH, YOU ARE SO COOL.
I JUST FEEL LIKE I
CAN TELL YOU STUFF.
221
00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:45,218
YOU KNOW, KINDA
LIKE YOU'RE MY...
222
00:09:45,252 --> 00:09:47,320
MY SISTER.
223
00:09:53,326 --> 00:09:56,764
SO, JANINE...
224
00:09:56,797 --> 00:09:58,799
DO YOU, UH,
225
00:09:58,832 --> 00:10:00,634
HAVE A BOYFRIEND?
226
00:10:00,668 --> 00:10:01,534
NO.
227
00:10:01,568 --> 00:10:04,171
BUT I'M LOOKING.
228
00:10:04,204 --> 00:10:06,674
WELL...
229
00:10:06,707 --> 00:10:10,410
LOOK NO FURTHER.
230
00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:11,679
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
231
00:10:11,712 --> 00:10:12,946
MAKING MY MOVE.
232
00:10:12,980 --> 00:10:15,315
TOMMY, WE CAN'T DO THAT.
233
00:10:15,348 --> 00:10:17,751
WE'RE, LIKE, COUSINS.
234
00:10:17,785 --> 00:10:19,987
OH, YEAH.
ABOUT THAT, SEE...
235
00:10:20,020 --> 00:10:22,589
THE THING IS, THAT'S
NOT REALLY ILLEGAL
OR ANYTHING.
236
00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:25,258
IT'S JUST...TABOO.
237
00:10:25,292 --> 00:10:27,060
OH, MY GOD!
238
00:10:27,094 --> 00:10:28,495
I'M, LIKE, SO CREEPED OUT.
239
00:10:28,528 --> 00:10:31,298
WAIT, WAIT. WE'RE
VERY DISTANT COUSINS.
240
00:10:31,331 --> 00:10:33,901
YOU HAVE NO IDEA
HOW DISTANT WE ARE.
DISTANT!
241
00:10:36,770 --> 00:10:39,306
OH, MARY, THE ODDEST THING
JUST HAPPENED.
242
00:10:39,339 --> 00:10:41,608
I THINK ONE OF MY RELATIVES
TOLD ME OFF.
243
00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:43,276
WAS IT JACOB?
244
00:10:43,310 --> 00:10:44,978
HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?
245
00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:46,980
DICK, HOW MUCH DID
YOUR FATHER TELL YOU
246
00:10:47,014 --> 00:10:51,819
ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED
BETWEEN HIM
AND THE FAMILY?
247
00:10:51,852 --> 00:10:52,753
NOT A LOT.
248
00:10:52,786 --> 00:10:55,188
H-HE LOST HIS MOUTH
IN THE WAR.
249
00:10:56,957 --> 00:10:58,658
YOU BETTER SIT DOWN.
250
00:11:00,260 --> 00:11:01,762
DICK...
251
00:11:01,795 --> 00:11:03,596
WHEN YOUR FATHER
FELL IN LOVE
WITH YOUR MOTHER,
252
00:11:03,630 --> 00:11:05,933
SHE HAD JUST ARRIVED
FROM LITHUANIA.
253
00:11:05,966 --> 00:11:08,668
SHE WAS POOR,
SHE DIDN'T SPEAK
ANY ENGLISH.
254
00:11:08,702 --> 00:11:10,670
THE FAMILY DIDN'T
APPROVE OF HER.
255
00:11:10,704 --> 00:11:11,071
MOMMY?
256
00:11:11,104 --> 00:11:13,240
ANYWAY...
257
00:11:13,273 --> 00:11:16,576
YOUR FATHER WAS FORCED
TO CHOOSE BETWEEN HER
AND THE FAMILY,
258
00:11:16,609 --> 00:11:17,945
AND HE CHOSE HER.
259
00:11:17,978 --> 00:11:18,779
DADDY?
260
00:11:18,812 --> 00:11:21,081
SO THE FAMILY...
DISOWNED HIM,
261
00:11:21,114 --> 00:11:23,050
AND IT WAS
JACOB'S FATHER
262
00:11:23,083 --> 00:11:25,385
WHO CUT HIM OUT
OF THE FAMILY
FURNITURE BUSINESS.
263
00:11:25,418 --> 00:11:28,188
CAST OUT ONTO THE STREET
BY HIS OWN FLESH AND BLOOD?
264
00:11:28,221 --> 00:11:29,489
MY GOD, MARY.
265
00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:32,659
MY FAMILY IS DESPICABLE.
266
00:11:32,692 --> 00:11:34,294
AH, YOU GET USED TO IT.
267
00:11:38,498 --> 00:11:40,633
THEY GAVE YOUR MOM
AND DAD THE BOOT, HUH?
268
00:11:40,667 --> 00:11:42,502
SALLY, IT'S
OUR MOM AND DAD.
269
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:44,337
IT'S NOBODY'S
MOM AND DAD!
270
00:11:44,371 --> 00:11:47,207
I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT
OUR FAMILY WOULD DO
ANYTHING SO HEARTLESS.
271
00:11:47,240 --> 00:11:50,243
DON'T EVEN GET ME
STARTED ON THIS FAMILY.
272
00:11:52,780 --> 00:11:54,347
ROGER'S A DRUNK.
273
00:11:54,381 --> 00:11:55,783
DARREN
HASN'T PAID TAXES
274
00:11:55,816 --> 00:11:58,318
SINCE THE EISENHOWER
ADMINISTRATION.
275
00:11:58,351 --> 00:12:02,122
COUSIN MARTY'S GOT
HIS OWN WEBSITE--
276
00:12:02,155 --> 00:12:04,057
NAKEDMARTY.COM.
277
00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:09,162
WHY DON'T WE JUST
ADMIT TO THEM
THAT WE'RE IMPOSTORS?
278
00:12:09,196 --> 00:12:10,097
YEAH, RIGHT.
279
00:12:10,130 --> 00:12:11,498
YOU JUST WANT US
TO COME CLEAN
280
00:12:11,531 --> 00:12:13,333
SO YOU CAN GO SUCK FACE
WITH YOUR COUSIN.
281
00:12:13,366 --> 00:12:15,135
YEAH, WELL, AT LEAST
I HAVEN'T DELUDED MYSELF
282
00:12:15,168 --> 00:12:16,636
INTO THINKING
I HAVE A SISTER.
283
00:12:16,669 --> 00:12:19,106
HEY, YOU LEAVE MISSY
OUT OF THIS.
284
00:12:19,139 --> 00:12:20,273
I'M CURIOUS.
285
00:12:20,307 --> 00:12:25,512
DOES THIS FAMILY HAVE
A HISTORY OF MENTAL ILLNESS?
286
00:12:25,545 --> 00:12:28,215
WELL, THERE IS
A TOUCH OF DEMENTIA
ON MY FATHER'S SIDE.
287
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:31,684
OH, THAT EXPLAINS
A FEW THINGS.
288
00:12:31,718 --> 00:12:32,752
DICK, WHAT ARE
YOU DOING?
289
00:12:32,786 --> 00:12:33,553
I HAVE TO TALK
TO JACOB.
290
00:12:33,586 --> 00:12:34,387
WELL,
CALM DOWN.
291
00:12:34,421 --> 00:12:35,455
JACOB,
WE HAVE TO TALK.
292
00:12:35,488 --> 00:12:37,690
HERE IT COMES.
293
00:12:37,724 --> 00:12:39,092
I'VE HEARD
SOME THINGS
ABOUT THE FAMILY
294
00:12:39,126 --> 00:12:39,893
AND THE BUSINESS--
295
00:12:39,927 --> 00:12:42,129
SO YOU FINALLY
WORKED UP THE MARBLES
296
00:12:42,162 --> 00:12:42,996
TO GET AROUND TO IT.
297
00:12:43,030 --> 00:12:44,497
SO, THIS IS
ABOUT THE BUSINESS.
298
00:12:44,531 --> 00:12:46,099
WHO'S SHE, YOUR LAWYER?
299
00:12:46,133 --> 00:12:48,201
OH, NO, I'M
HIS GIRLFRIEND.
300
00:12:48,235 --> 00:12:49,102
OH.
301
00:12:49,136 --> 00:12:50,137
NOT MARRIED?
302
00:12:50,170 --> 00:12:52,005
THAT'S CURIOUS.
303
00:12:52,039 --> 00:12:53,106
LOOK, DICK,
304
00:12:53,140 --> 00:12:54,875
YOUR FATHER
LEFT THIS FAMILY,
305
00:12:54,908 --> 00:12:56,576
AND MY FATHER WAS RIGHT
TO CUT HIM OUT
OF THE BUSINESS.
306
00:12:56,609 --> 00:12:59,412
AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED,
YOU'RE NOT ENTITLED
TO A PENNY.
307
00:12:59,446 --> 00:13:01,281
YOU THINK I WANT MONEY?!
308
00:13:01,314 --> 00:13:03,050
WELL, BY THE LOOKS OF
THAT CAR YOU ARRIVED IN,
309
00:13:03,083 --> 00:13:04,952
I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED.
310
00:13:04,985 --> 00:13:06,019
I WOULD HAVE YOU KNOW
311
00:13:06,053 --> 00:13:09,089
THAT I'M QUALIFIED
FOR PLATINUM STATUS!
312
00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:11,158
SO I'D ZIP IT
IF I WERE YOU!
313
00:13:11,191 --> 00:13:14,161
OH, PLEASE.
WE SHOULDN'T
GET PERSONAL.
314
00:13:14,194 --> 00:13:15,863
I'D STAY OUT OF THIS,
HONEY.
315
00:13:15,896 --> 00:13:17,998
HONEY?!
316
00:13:18,031 --> 00:13:20,500
WELL, LET ME TELL YOU
A THING OR TWO, HONEY.
317
00:13:20,533 --> 00:13:22,535
WHOEVER DID
YOUR ELECTROLYSIS...
318
00:13:22,569 --> 00:13:25,472
MISSED A SPOT!
319
00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:27,074
HOW DARE YOU?!
320
00:13:27,107 --> 00:13:27,875
COME ON, JACOB.
321
00:13:27,908 --> 00:13:29,176
OH, THAT'S RIGHT.
THAT'S RIGHT!
322
00:13:29,209 --> 00:13:30,944
HIDE BEHIND
HER APRON STRINGS.
323
00:13:30,978 --> 00:13:33,847
OH, PLEASE, RICHARD.
YOU'RE ACTING JUST
LIKE YOUR FATHER.
324
00:13:33,881 --> 00:13:35,115
DAMN STRAIGHT,
AUNT FLORENCE!
325
00:13:35,148 --> 00:13:36,850
DAMN STRAIGHT!
326
00:13:41,021 --> 00:13:43,423
[PLAYING CLARINET
BADLY]
327
00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:45,692
MAN, I CAN'T CATCH A BREAK.
328
00:13:45,725 --> 00:13:47,995
I FINALLY MEET A HOT GIRL--
WHO LIKES ME--
329
00:13:48,028 --> 00:13:50,964
AND SHE TURNS OUT TO BE
MY COUSIN?!
330
00:13:50,998 --> 00:13:54,467
WELL...
HAPPENS TO A LOT
OF GUYS, KIDDO.
331
00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,205
JANINE.
332
00:13:58,238 --> 00:14:01,208
WAIT A SECOND.
JANINE SOLOMON?
YEAH.
333
00:14:01,241 --> 00:14:03,076
WELL, THIS IS
YOUR LUCKY DAY.
334
00:14:03,110 --> 00:14:05,378
UNCLE ABE TOLD ME
SHE'S ADOPTED.
335
00:14:05,412 --> 00:14:07,948
ADOPTED?
ARE YOU SURE?
336
00:14:07,981 --> 00:14:12,852
OH, DON'T EVEN GET ME
STARTED ON HER FATHER'S
LOW SPERM COUNT.
337
00:14:14,487 --> 00:14:17,224
HARRY!
I COULD KISS YOU!
338
00:14:18,391 --> 00:14:19,960
HEY, SALLY, CAN I
TELL YOU A SECRET?
339
00:14:19,993 --> 00:14:22,429
SURE, MISSY.
OF COURSE YOU CAN.
340
00:14:22,462 --> 00:14:24,131
I'M A VIRGIN.
341
00:14:24,164 --> 00:14:25,432
WOW.
I KNOW.
342
00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:28,301
REALLY? WOW.
343
00:14:28,335 --> 00:14:31,905
I REMEMBER WHAT THOSE DAYS
WERE LIKE, YOU KNOW.
344
00:14:31,939 --> 00:14:35,108
FEELING LIKE I WAS
THE ONLY PERSON ON EARTH
WHO HADN'T HAD SEX.
345
00:14:35,142 --> 00:14:37,377
WONDERING WHAT IT
WAS GONNA BE LIKE.
346
00:14:37,410 --> 00:14:38,711
WHEN DID YOU LOSE
YOUR VIRGINITY?
347
00:14:38,745 --> 00:14:40,547
AH, A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO.
348
00:14:44,617 --> 00:14:45,352
WOW.
349
00:14:45,385 --> 00:14:46,920
YEAH. SO WHAT ARE YOU
WAITING FOR?
350
00:14:46,954 --> 00:14:50,790
I DON'T KNOW.
UH, THE RIGHT GUY.
351
00:14:50,823 --> 00:14:52,459
OH, MY GOD.
352
00:14:52,492 --> 00:14:54,561
THAT IS EXACTLY
WHAT I DID.
353
00:14:54,594 --> 00:14:56,663
THAT IS SO COOL!
354
00:14:58,165 --> 00:14:59,799
LOOK,
I'M TELLIN' YA.
355
00:14:59,832 --> 00:15:01,901
I HEARD YA.
356
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:05,872
FAH! YOU SHOULD
BE SO LUCKY.
357
00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:10,110
AH! I SHOULD
LIVE SO LONG.
358
00:15:10,143 --> 00:15:11,044
BRAUGGGHH!
359
00:15:11,078 --> 00:15:12,479
YAAAH-AGGH!
360
00:15:14,281 --> 00:15:15,648
JANINE. THERE YOU ARE.
361
00:15:15,682 --> 00:15:17,150
I'VE BEEN LOOKING
ALL OVER FOR YOU.
362
00:15:17,184 --> 00:15:19,386
I KNOW.
I'VE BEEN AVOIDING YOU.
363
00:15:19,419 --> 00:15:20,620
NO, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.
364
00:15:20,653 --> 00:15:24,491
SEE, IT'S OK IF WE KISS
BECAUSE WE'RE NOT RELATED.
365
00:15:24,524 --> 00:15:26,059
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
366
00:15:26,093 --> 00:15:29,129
YOU KNOW,
'CAUSE YOU'RE ADOPTED.
367
00:15:29,162 --> 00:15:30,797
ADOPTED?
368
00:15:30,830 --> 00:15:32,932
[NERVOUS LAUGH]
NO. NO WAY. NO, I'M NOT.
369
00:15:32,966 --> 00:15:35,268
YEAH, SURE YOU ARE.
EVERYBODY KNOWS IT.
370
00:15:35,302 --> 00:15:39,672
SO, UH...
YOU WANNA MAKE OUT?
371
00:15:39,706 --> 00:15:40,907
MOM!
372
00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:43,210
YEAH.
YOU JUST CONFIRM IT
WITH YOUR MOTHER
373
00:15:43,243 --> 00:15:45,012
AND, UH,
GET BACK TO ME.
374
00:15:50,017 --> 00:15:52,219
THEY'RE RIGHT.
YOU CAN'T GO HOME AGAIN.
375
00:15:52,252 --> 00:15:54,687
SO MUCH FOR "FAMILY"
AND "BROTHERHOOD"
376
00:15:54,721 --> 00:15:57,690
AND "HOME IS
WHERE THE HEART IS."
WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!
377
00:15:57,724 --> 00:16:00,393
NOW YOU KNOW WHERE
I'VE BEEN COMING FROM.
378
00:16:00,427 --> 00:16:01,961
YOU GO HOME
FOR THE HOLIDAYS,
379
00:16:01,995 --> 00:16:04,197
YOU SEE THAT BEAUTIFUL
CHRISTMAS TREE
IN THE WINDOW.
380
00:16:04,231 --> 00:16:06,599
EVERYTHING LOOKS
SO IDYLLIC.
381
00:16:06,633 --> 00:16:07,967
AND ALL OF A SUDDEN
THERE'S YOUR MOTHER
382
00:16:08,001 --> 00:16:09,902
SWINGING A 5-IRON
AT YOUR FATHER'S HEAD,
383
00:16:09,936 --> 00:16:12,905
AND THE TREE'S
IN THE EGGNOG.
384
00:16:12,939 --> 00:16:14,274
HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH IT?
385
00:16:14,307 --> 00:16:16,043
I REPRESS.
386
00:16:16,076 --> 00:16:19,346
REPRESSION IS THE KEY
TO A HAPPY FAMILY.
387
00:16:19,379 --> 00:16:21,448
DOESN'T SOUND
VERY HEALTHY.
388
00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:22,649
IF YOU YELL AND SCREAM,
389
00:16:22,682 --> 00:16:25,418
YOU END UP SOUNDING
LIKE YOUR MOTHER.
390
00:16:25,452 --> 00:16:28,221
I'M GONNA GO GET
ANOTHER DRINK.
391
00:16:28,255 --> 00:16:29,722
DIDN'T YOU JUST FINISH ONE?
392
00:16:29,756 --> 00:16:32,559
GET OFF MY BACK!
393
00:16:34,561 --> 00:16:36,529
HEY, SO, DO YOU THINK
I SHOULD GO LIGHTER?
394
00:16:36,563 --> 00:16:39,132
HONEY, IF YOU DO,
I WILL KILL YOU.
395
00:16:39,166 --> 00:16:40,933
MICHELLE!
396
00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:41,768
JENNY!
397
00:16:41,801 --> 00:16:43,403
[BOTH SHRIEK]
398
00:16:43,436 --> 00:16:45,205
MICHELLE? MICHELLE?
399
00:16:45,238 --> 00:16:45,872
MICHELLE!
400
00:16:45,905 --> 00:16:47,607
HUH?
401
00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:49,209
WHO'S THAT?
402
00:16:49,242 --> 00:16:50,210
OH! OH!
403
00:16:50,243 --> 00:16:51,378
WHY, SALLY, THIS IS JENNY.
404
00:16:51,411 --> 00:16:52,479
HI, JENNY.
HI.
405
00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:54,647
SHE'S MY SISTER.
406
00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:55,215
SISTER?
407
00:16:55,248 --> 00:16:56,316
HOW'S BOOTY?
408
00:16:56,349 --> 00:16:58,085
OH,
BOOTY'S GREAT.
409
00:16:58,118 --> 00:16:59,086
WH-WHO'S BOOTY?
410
00:16:59,119 --> 00:17:01,321
HEY, DID YOU SING
TO THE LAKE YET?
411
00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:02,555
YOU GUYS SING
TO THE LAKE?
412
00:17:02,589 --> 00:17:04,224
OH, YEAH. EVER
SINCE WE WERE KIDS.
413
00:17:04,257 --> 00:17:07,660
OH, GREAT! LET'S GO
DO SOME LAKE SINGIN'!
414
00:17:07,694 --> 00:17:10,797
UH, WELL, IT'S KINDA
JUST BETWEEN THE TWO OF US.
415
00:17:10,830 --> 00:17:12,065
ARE YOU SURE
I CAN'T HELP?
416
00:17:12,099 --> 00:17:15,568
I MEAN,
THAT'S A--A BIG LAKE,
417
00:17:15,602 --> 00:17:17,937
AND I'M REAL LOUD.
418
00:17:17,970 --> 00:17:20,140
UH...IT'S OK.
419
00:17:20,173 --> 00:17:22,375
YOU KNOW, IT'S JUST THIS
SORT OF STUPID SISTER THING.
420
00:17:22,409 --> 00:17:24,677
[AWKWARD LAUGH]
421
00:17:35,255 --> 00:17:36,156
ALL RIGHT,
EVERYBODY,
422
00:17:36,189 --> 00:17:38,057
GET READY.
HERE WE GO.
423
00:17:41,161 --> 00:17:43,230
OHH! [MUTTERING]
424
00:17:45,832 --> 00:17:48,235
[SARCASTIC] THIS WAS
SOME GREAT IDEA, DICK.
425
00:17:48,268 --> 00:17:50,036
YEAH, I CAN'T WAIT TO
COME BACK NEXT YEAR.
426
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:52,639
DICK, YOU WANNA TELL YOUR
FAMILY TO STOP WHINING.
427
00:17:52,672 --> 00:17:54,941
NO. JUST SMILE
AND REPRESS.
428
00:17:54,974 --> 00:17:55,942
SMILE AND REPRESS.
429
00:17:55,975 --> 00:17:56,643
ALL RIGHT
NOW, EVERYBODY.
430
00:17:56,676 --> 00:17:58,178
COME ON NOW,
SQUEEZE TOGETHER.
431
00:17:58,211 --> 00:17:59,446
SQUEEZE TOGETHER,
THAT'S GOOD.
432
00:17:59,479 --> 00:18:01,248
GOOD. HA HA.
433
00:18:01,281 --> 00:18:02,515
ALL RIGHT NOW...
434
00:18:02,549 --> 00:18:03,683
EVERYBODY...
435
00:18:03,716 --> 00:18:06,353
SMILE!
436
00:18:06,386 --> 00:18:08,755
OHH!
437
00:18:08,788 --> 00:18:11,023
I CAN'T SMILE!
I HAVE NOTHING
TO SMILE ABOUT!
438
00:18:11,057 --> 00:18:12,259
I HATE THIS FAMILY!
439
00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:13,693
RIGHT BACK AT YA, DICK!
440
00:18:13,726 --> 00:18:16,629
AND I SO WANTED
TO BE PROUD OF YOU.
441
00:18:16,663 --> 00:18:18,398
[BITTERLY]
MY FAMILY.
442
00:18:18,431 --> 00:18:21,901
YOU WERE SUPPOSED
TO GIVE ME WARMTH
AND UNENDING LOVE.
443
00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:25,172
INSTEAD YOU GIVE ME
A PUNCH IN THE GUT
AND A COLD TUNA MELT!
444
00:18:25,205 --> 00:18:26,473
WELL, I'VE HAD IT!
445
00:18:26,506 --> 00:18:28,575
AND SO I TAKE MY LEAVE
OF THIS HELLHOUSE
446
00:18:28,608 --> 00:18:30,009
JUST LIKE MY FATHER
BEFORE ME!
447
00:18:30,042 --> 00:18:31,077
BYE-BYE NOW.
448
00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:33,246
I'D PACK YOU A DOGGY BAG,
BUT I SAW HER
449
00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:35,715
STUFFING THE HORS D'OEUVRES
INTO HER POCKETS.
450
00:18:35,748 --> 00:18:38,551
DON'T FLATTER YOURSELF.
IT WAS THE SILVERWARE.
451
00:18:40,153 --> 00:18:41,688
EXCUSE ME.
WEREN'T YOU LEAVING?
452
00:18:41,721 --> 00:18:43,356
OH, BELIEVE ME,
WE'RE LEAVING.
453
00:18:43,390 --> 00:18:48,027
[ALL TALKING AT ONCE]
454
00:18:48,060 --> 00:18:54,066
HEY! HEY! HEY!
455
00:18:54,100 --> 00:18:57,704
WHAT THE HELL'S THE MATTER
WITH YOU PEOPLE?
456
00:18:57,737 --> 00:19:00,540
YOU KNOW WHAT? I GOT
A LITTLE NEWS FLASH FOR YA.
457
00:19:00,573 --> 00:19:02,309
DICK, JACOB,
458
00:19:02,342 --> 00:19:06,078
BOTH YOUR FATHERS
WERE WORLD-CLASS
PAINS IN THE ASS.
459
00:19:06,112 --> 00:19:07,980
AND YOU KNOW WHAT I
ADMIRE ABOUT 'EM?
460
00:19:08,014 --> 00:19:09,516
THEY'RE BOTH DEAD!
461
00:19:12,252 --> 00:19:14,521
AND RIGHT NOW,
I WISH I WAS WITH 'EM.
462
00:19:14,554 --> 00:19:16,323
AMEN TO THAT!
463
00:19:16,356 --> 00:19:18,024
40 YEARS LATER,
464
00:19:18,057 --> 00:19:21,060
YOU TWO MORONS
ARE STILL CARRYING ON
THE SAME GRUDGE?!
465
00:19:21,093 --> 00:19:22,329
GIVE IT A REST!
466
00:19:22,362 --> 00:19:24,431
WHAT, YOU DON'T LIKE
EACH OTHER? BOO-HOO!
467
00:19:24,464 --> 00:19:27,099
SUCK IT UP.
YOU'RE FAMILY!
468
00:19:27,133 --> 00:19:30,270
DON'T GET ME STARTED.
469
00:19:30,303 --> 00:19:32,205
HARRY,
470
00:19:32,239 --> 00:19:34,541
YOU ARE SO RIGHT.
471
00:19:34,574 --> 00:19:37,176
THIS TIME LAST WEEK
I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE
A FAMILY.
472
00:19:37,210 --> 00:19:40,880
AND NOW HERE I AM,
READY TO REJECT YOU ALL
473
00:19:40,913 --> 00:19:43,750
JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T MEET
MY STUPID EXPECTATIONS.
474
00:19:43,783 --> 00:19:46,586
YEAH, YOU GUYS HAVE
BOTH GOT A POINT.
475
00:19:46,619 --> 00:19:48,187
THIS FAMILY'S BEEN
SPLIT UP TOO LONG.
476
00:19:48,221 --> 00:19:51,324
IN FACT, I DON'T EVEN
REMEMBER WHY ANYMORE.
477
00:19:51,358 --> 00:19:55,562
DICK, YOU MAY NOT BE
MY KIND OF GUY,
478
00:19:55,595 --> 00:19:57,464
BUT YOU'RE A SOLOMON.
479
00:19:57,497 --> 00:20:00,567
AND THERE'S NOT MUCH
I CAN DO ABOUT THAT.
480
00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:02,034
SAME HERE, JACOB.
481
00:20:02,068 --> 00:20:05,738
YOU MAY BE KIND OF CREEPY,
BUT YOU'RE FAMILY.
482
00:20:05,772 --> 00:20:07,574
COUSIN?
COUSIN.
483
00:20:07,607 --> 00:20:09,342
WELL, THAT'S MORE LIKE IT.
484
00:20:09,376 --> 00:20:11,010
OH, JACOB!
485
00:20:16,949 --> 00:20:17,484
AAH!
486
00:20:17,517 --> 00:20:18,918
GET AWAY FROM ME!
487
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:24,123
WELL, GOOD-BYE NOW,
SALLY.
488
00:20:24,156 --> 00:20:26,293
BYE-BYE, JENNY.
489
00:20:26,326 --> 00:20:26,926
IT WAS REALLY GREAT
MEETING YOU, SALLY.
490
00:20:26,959 --> 00:20:28,395
YEAH, YOU, TOO,
MICHELLE.
491
00:20:28,428 --> 00:20:30,363
HEY...
492
00:20:30,397 --> 00:20:33,466
IF ANYTHING SHOULD
HAPPEN TO JENNY...
493
00:20:33,500 --> 00:20:36,569
YOU KNOW?
494
00:20:36,603 --> 00:20:38,104
GIVE ME A CALL.
495
00:20:40,039 --> 00:20:44,277
GOOD-BYE, RICHARD.
I'M SO GLAD YOU CAME.
496
00:20:44,311 --> 00:20:46,613
IT'S NICE TO BE
ONE FAMILY AGAIN.
497
00:20:46,646 --> 00:20:48,180
OH, IT SURE IS.
498
00:20:48,214 --> 00:20:49,549
GOOD-BYE, SYLVIA.
499
00:20:49,582 --> 00:20:50,950
GOOD-BYE.
500
00:20:50,983 --> 00:20:52,685
YOU KNOW, MARY,
501
00:20:52,719 --> 00:20:55,388
THE GREAT THING
ABOUT REDISCOVERING
YOUR ROOTS IS
502
00:20:55,422 --> 00:20:58,391
YOU SUDDENLY HAVE
A WHOLE NEW WORLD
OF PEOPLE TO BLAME
503
00:20:58,425 --> 00:21:01,494
FOR, YOU KNOW,
EVERYTHING.
504
00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:03,229
HARRY.
505
00:21:03,262 --> 00:21:04,163
ABE.
506
00:21:04,196 --> 00:21:06,198
I WANT YOU
TO HAVE THESE.
507
00:21:06,232 --> 00:21:09,001
OHH, THAT'S SO NICE.
508
00:21:09,035 --> 00:21:12,138
AWW, I'M GONNA MISS YOU,
UNCLE ABE.
509
00:21:12,171 --> 00:21:16,042
OH, DON'T GET ME STARTED
WITH THAT EMOTIONAL CRAP.
510
00:21:16,075 --> 00:21:17,877
IT'S TOO LATE!
511
00:21:17,910 --> 00:21:20,012
I'VE ALREADY STARTED!
512
00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:29,288
JANINE, HI. IT'S TOMMY.
513
00:21:29,322 --> 00:21:31,524
UH, FROM THE REUNION?
514
00:21:31,558 --> 00:21:34,060
RIGHT, YEAH,
THE ONE WHO TOLD YOU
YOU WERE ADOPTED, RIGHT.
515
00:21:34,093 --> 00:21:37,564
ANYWAY. SAY, UH, YOU
WANNA GO OUT ON SUNDAY?
516
00:21:37,597 --> 00:21:40,367
OH, MEETING YOUR
BIRTH MOTHER, HUH?
517
00:21:40,400 --> 00:21:41,668
WELL, LISTEN, CAN IT WAIT?
518
00:21:41,701 --> 00:21:45,472
YOU KNOW,
IT'S BEEN 16 YEARS.
WHAT'S ANOTHER DAY, RIGHT?
519
00:21:45,505 --> 00:21:46,839
UH, WELL, MAYBE
I COULD COME, YOU KNOW?
520
00:21:46,873 --> 00:21:49,241
WE COULD CATCH A MOVIE,
SWING BY YOUR BIRTH MOM'S.
521
00:21:49,275 --> 00:21:51,344
HELLO? HELLO? HEL--
522
00:21:51,378 --> 00:21:53,346
OH, MAN. GOT CUT OFF.
35845
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