Original subtitles

(opening theme playing)

Titans go!

As soon as we get an alert on my communicator.

Hopefully, at any moment now. (meows)

(beeping)

(beeping)

Crime? (meows)

More like microwave popcorn.

Want some? Make me a bag.

But remain vigilant.

It must not burn.

Aye-aye. (softly) weirdo.

(beeping)

We've gone a whole week without a crime alert.

I think it's starting to get to him.

Yeah, robin is definitely going through mission withdrawal.

That would explain the involuntary eye movement.

Titans! All: (gasping) what!

Still nothing to report.

Come on, dude.

Chill out.

Yes, robin.

Perhaps you should take advantage of the lull in criminal activities

In order to do "the relax."

Relax?

(laughs nervously)

Uh, you do know how to relax, don't you?

(scoffs) I can relax circles around you fools.

Says the guy who tried to turn sleeping into a competitive sport.

On your mark, get set, sleep. (whistle blows)

(snoring rapidly)

Well, it's just as leader, I'm not used to going this long

Without doing something productive.

But, I can totally take it easy until there's an alert.

Good, 'cause that's what we're gonna do.

Ah, something happen, please!

(ratcheting)

You are just the prettiest, high performance, low-emission muffler I've ever seen.

Yes, you are.

Hey, cyborg. You relaxing?

(sighs) I was.

Mind if I join you? Yes.

Looks like we've got a lot of work ahead of us

If we want this to be ready for the next mission.

I'm just tinkering, robin. Not trying to save the world.

I bet we could rebuild this whole engine pretty quick.

Knock it out in 15, 16 hours tops.

(grunts)

(clattering)

Ooh. You mind relaxing somewhere else?

(banging on door) enter.

Care to join me in the earth relaxation ritual of a spa mask?

I've made mine of gorka berries, pickles and cream cheese.

(chuckles)

Is it not like a million little toes dancing on your face?

Can you feel the invasion of your pore holes?

And can you feel the alpha hydroxy acid I added

To deaden our nerve endings

And increase our pain tolerance for the next mission?

Acid?

Is that why it feels like the little toes

Are dancing more vigorously?

(wheezes) that means it's working.

(huffing) feel the burn.

Oh, I am feeling the burn. (kettle boiling)

And I do not like it!

(screaming)

(loud crash)

(banging on door)

Interesting fact about bonsai... No.

Robin: Missed a spot.

(growling)

Hey, robin. Wanna play fetch?

Uh, catch.

Sounds super relaxing.

And an opportunity to see if my arm exercises have been working.

(grunting)

(groaning) (bones cracking)

Ouch. (sighs)

Your turn. Ready when you are, beast boy.

Okay, let's go. (cracking)

I'm waiting. (cracking)

You couldn't just relax for one afternoon?

You guys may not like it,

But my job as leader is to always remain vigilant.

(beeping)

(beeping)

(shouting) yes, finally!

(laughing) titans, go!

Take hold of your horses, robin.

You are going nowhere. Yeah.

You're staying here until you learn to take it easy, bro.

And how are you gonna stop me?

With this. (beeping)

(scoffs) whatever that is

It's not gonna keep me from the mission...

(screams) (electricity crackling)

If you try to leave the tower,

That collar will activate an electric fence.

As the leader of this group, you can't tell me...

(screams) (electricity crackling)

This is for your own good, robin.

So enjoy your day off.

(chuckling) that's very funny. Now knock it off!

(screaming) (electricity crackling)

(coughs) hey.

Oh, wait for me. (screams) (electricity crackling)

(panting) you really think a little shock will... (screams)

(electricity crackling) (loud thud)

Robin: So much hurt.

Uh-huh.

I know how to help on the mission.

(beeping)

(roaring)

Starfire, you need to build up speed for a better trajectory.

My flying is not the problem.

Bye, robin.

(beeping)

Raven, maybe the... No.

Cyborg, look out!

Cyborg: (grunts) oh, come on.

Beast boy, go pterodactyl!

Titans, focus!

All: Robin, chill out.

(beeping)

(sighs)

(elevator bell dings)

Beast boy, what are you doing here?

I thought you were at the battle.

Oh, right.

Forgot you were home, dude.

I was just gonna hang out here today.

But I just saw you there.

Sometimes I replace myself with an animal I painted green. (chuckles)

Beast boy, help me! (dog barking)

That explains a lot.

I've got to figure out a way to remove this collar and get back out there.

Or you could just relax.

(screams) (electricity crackling)

I just can't for some reason.

It's so easy for everyone else to just chill out.

I've tried, but it just doesn't happen.

I don't even know where to start.

(panting) whoa!

You're more uptight than I thought, dude. (breathing heavily)

Just think of nothing and no one.

Ignore all outside distractions.

Here's your test.

For the rest of the day, no communicator.

No communicator.

No problem. That's a start.

Now stand up.

Look at it.

(clicking tongue)

You've barely even left a butt print on the couch.

In order to truly relax,

You've gotta learn to be one with the couch.

Be one with the couch?

(exhales)

Just follow the master.

Mmm. (moaning)

(humming)

Okay, is there like a specific way I should hum?

Like, in a minor key?

(humming)

Or should I go with a major?

(humming)

Or maybe... Shh.

Let go, and be one with the couch.

What?

How are you doing that?

Just find your chill, bro.

Wait, I have more questions!

Beast boy, don't leave me!

(clears throat)

(humming out of tune)

(groaning)

(beeping) (gasps)

(beeping)

Dude, what are you doing?

What if it's an emergency? (beeping)

Ah, fine. Go answer it.

(scoffs) it'll be quick.

I knew you couldn't relax for even one afternoon.

Guess we finally found something that I'm better at than you.

(laughing)

Beast boy better at something than me?

(beeping)

Just think of nothing and no one.

Ignore all outside distractions.

(inhaling)

I will master oneness with the couch.

Woah!

Who are you?

I am the couch.

Tell me what it is that you seek, baby.

I wish to relax, your couchness.

You have mastered the first step.

But something is keeping you from truly relaxing.

Yeah, it's because I'm the leader,

And leaders must stay vigilant.

That is not why you cannot relax, my man.

Then why?

That is something you must find out

For yourself. (echoing)

(communicator beeping)

Hey! Hey, where did you go?

Couch!

(communicator beeping)

(all beeping)

(exhales deeply)

The circus where I grew up.

This is the last place I remember being able to really relax.

Being a baby was the greatest.

Hey, that's mine.

(sniffles)

Give it back!

(monkey gibbering) (animals laughing)

It's all coming back to me.

Every time I let my guard down

You jerky circus animals would take my stuff.

That's why I've always been so vigilant.

Indeed.

All because a monkey stole your diaper.

Not the reason I was expecting.

Now, take the day off and relax.

The animals can't bother you anymore.

You're right. They can't.

Dude.

(beeping)

Robin: Sorry.

It's my day off.

Robin, we need you! (roaring)

Answer your communicator.

Why is beast boy just sitting there?

Help!

(roaring)

(cooing)

(roaring)

(roaring)

(belching)

(grunting loudly)

(beeping)

Yeah!

Great idea, robin.

Blowing up the slime monster.

It was either that, raven, or the total destruction of jump city.

Look at us. We're covered with smelly, evil, space goo.

It's even in my nose.

Not part of the slime monster, beast boy.

Oh.

(meowing)

Our costumes were due for a major washing anyway.

But whose turn is it to do this most disagreeable of chores?

Uh, you know, they're not that dirty.

What's a couple more weeks without soap?

(sniffing)

(clattering) (powering down)

(choir singing)

(vacuum whirring)

Okay, someone is gonna have to wash them.

And there's only one fair way to decide who.

You mean, go by the chores list?

(whirring)

(gulps)

What chores list?

The only way to decide is by a series of epic contests,

Where the loser has to clean our clothes.

Titans, go!

(bell dings)

You blinked. No, you blinked!

No, I saw you blink!

Nah-ah, you did. And I win!

(bell dings)

(bell dings)

(bell dings)

(bell dinging)

(snorting)

I have won the hot dog eating contest.

(vomiting)

Ahem. After compiling the results,

It looks like the teen titan stuck with laundry duty is...

Robin: Raven. (crowd cheering)

It was supposed to be your turn, robin.

(laughs) I have no idea what you're talking about.

(belches)

Really?

Okay, then I'll need your clothes.

(screams)

Ahh! Oh! (laughing)

Stop staring at my circuits!

(munching)

Uh, you guys should probably put some clothes on.

(shouting)

Phew.

(robin screaming)

(croaking)

(girls screaming) (camera clicking)

(grunting)

(thudding)

(thudding)

(buzzing)

(shouting) I need my suit!

(girls screaming)

So, what exactly gets out evil alien slime stains?

(beeps)

(washing machine rattling)

(jackhammering)

(pulsing)

(gun powering up)

(explosion)

Raven: Nothing's working.

(groans) this is a nightmare!

And it's all robin's fault.

If I see that weasel again...

(gasps)

Oh, you want me to let you in?

I suppose I could,

If you agree to do the laundry like you're supposed to.

(exhales)

(camera clicking)

Last chance.

(laughing)

(bubbling)

Hmm.

All right, let's see what we got in the old closet.

(whirring)

Too spikey.

Too brainy. Nope. Nope.

Nope, nope, nope.

(chuckles) how did that get in my closet?

I need my suit back.

Laundry day has given me the perfect excuse

To take up that most fascinating of earth hobbies.

Sewing.

It appears to be a straightforward process.

(clicking)

(ringing)

Now, let us see how I have done.

Glorg borger!

It's hideous!

Perhaps I did not use enough milk?

I need my suit back!

� tofu, tofu, gonna eat me some tofu

(humming)

� tofu in my mouth

� tofu in my mouth

� tofu in my mouth

(slurping)

(loud clanging)

Oh, great.

With my robot army,

Soon all of jump city will be under my control.

(cackling)

Do I really have to deal with this now?

Ah, the boy blunder.

If you think the teen titans can stop my...

(gasps) robin!

You aren't wearing any pants.

This ends now!

Or I'm going to have to come over there.

Don't think I won't, gizmo.

Uh, no, no. Stay over there.

I'll take over the world another time.

(clanging)

(clanging)

(banging) (clicking)

(panting)

We need our clothes.

(clattering)

You better have our suits ready.

(crashing) uh, that's gonna be a problem.

(all screaming)

(all grunting)

Are those our clothes?

The slime's taken them over.

(electronic gibberish)

(explosion)

(dance music playing)

You call that washing them, raven?

Maybe you should have done them yourself, robin. Like you were supposed to.

Guys, we've got bigger problems than that now.

Then there's only one thing to do.

Titans, go!

(crowd cheering)

(straining) our clothes are putting us on.

This is not a good look.

(grunting)

(screaming) hey!

(grunting) hey! Ow!

Don't you... Ow!

Ow! Ow. Ow.

(grunting)

(all grunting) this is the nastiest load of laundry ever!

Not how I thought we'd go out.

It was my turn to do laundry.

I'm sorry, raven.

The truth is, if we can only get out of this,

I'd do all the teen titans' laundry for the next year.

That's just what I was waiting to hear.

Azarath metrion zinthos!

Wait.

It wasn't the slime that took control of our clothes?

Nope, it was a magic spell.

(siren wailing)

You tricked me!

And now you get to do laundry for the next year. Sucker!

(alarm blaring) uh-oh.

Look, we have another alert.

A creature made of fruit juice and barbecue sauce

Is terrorizing the city!

Oh, man.

That sounds messy.

Titans, go.