Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:06,108 --> 00:00:09,427
( Gary groans )
God, that is really bad.
2
00:00:09,603 --> 00:00:11,363
Can't we get this shit
out of here?
3
00:00:11,398 --> 00:00:12,866
Not until the shutdown is over.
4
00:00:12,900 --> 00:00:14,567
- The garbage collection is suspended...
- ( Bags rustle )
5
00:00:14,602 --> 00:00:16,370
- ( Shrieks )
- Wait, what?
6
00:00:16,404 --> 00:00:18,839
- ( Scoffs )
- Did I hear the VP scream?
7
00:00:18,873 --> 00:00:22,342
No, that was me.
And it was a shout.
8
00:00:22,376 --> 00:00:24,278
There was a rat on the garbage,
9
00:00:24,312 --> 00:00:26,113
so I shouted to scare it off.
10
00:00:26,147 --> 00:00:29,584
- That was a man's voice?
- Yeah, 'cause I'm a man.
11
00:00:29,618 --> 00:00:32,087
I have a man's voice.
12
00:00:32,121 --> 00:00:34,423
Yeah, that's right.
Walk away.
13
00:00:34,458 --> 00:00:36,592
Walk away.
14
00:00:37,594 --> 00:00:39,029
( Chuckles )
15
00:00:39,063 --> 00:00:41,265
( Theme music playing )
16
00:00:51,912 --> 00:00:54,380
Gary: I swear to God,
it was massive.
17
00:00:54,414 --> 00:00:56,049
- It was like a pony.
- Squeak, squeak.
18
00:00:56,083 --> 00:00:57,684
God! Stop!
That's not cool.
19
00:00:57,718 --> 00:01:00,387
Okay, guys, I'm not
gonna drag this out.
20
00:01:00,421 --> 00:01:01,554
We're in shutdown mode.
21
00:01:01,589 --> 00:01:03,423
I've got to have
a skeleton staff.
22
00:01:03,457 --> 00:01:05,292
- So Keith stays, right?
- What?
23
00:01:05,326 --> 00:01:07,762
Keith. He's skinny
like a skeleton.
24
00:01:07,796 --> 00:01:09,664
Ma'am, please.
I can't afford to be furloughed.
25
00:01:09,698 --> 00:01:11,966
- No, you're not. But, Dan, you are.
- Ma'am.
26
00:01:12,001 --> 00:01:14,136
Yeah, you know,
you two do similar jobs.
27
00:01:14,170 --> 00:01:15,971
It just makes economic sense
for you to go, Dan.
28
00:01:16,005 --> 00:01:17,506
Does that mean he makes
more money than I do?
29
00:01:17,541 --> 00:01:19,275
Selina: Anyway, the deal is
it's not going to be long
30
00:01:19,309 --> 00:01:21,010
because I've got a meeting
with the Speaker today.
31
00:01:21,045 --> 00:01:22,479
- Is that correct?
- Today, yes.
32
00:01:22,513 --> 00:01:23,947
So I'm gonna shut down
the shutdown.
33
00:01:24,015 --> 00:01:25,515
Gary: It looks like it's
between you and me.
34
00:01:25,550 --> 00:01:27,150
Without me, this office
will implode.
35
00:01:27,185 --> 00:01:29,787
Gary, the Secret Service is
calling you Girly Shirley Temple.
36
00:01:29,821 --> 00:01:30,988
- So you need to just cut...
- Sue.
37
00:01:31,023 --> 00:01:32,023
- Yeah?
- You're going home.
38
00:01:32,057 --> 00:01:33,224
Oh!
39
00:01:33,259 --> 00:01:36,461
- Yeah, I'm sorry.
- Fine.
40
00:01:36,496 --> 00:01:38,664
I need a moment.
( Crying )
41
00:01:38,698 --> 00:01:41,066
Oh, man, that's tough.
42
00:01:41,100 --> 00:01:43,435
Oh, my God.
I feel so bad for her.
43
00:01:43,503 --> 00:01:45,137
- Come on, she had to go.
- Poor Sue.
44
00:01:45,171 --> 00:01:47,406
- Poor Sue.
- I guess I'll be heading out.
45
00:01:47,441 --> 00:01:50,844
Okay. I need to remind you you cannot
make work-related contact with anyone
46
00:01:50,878 --> 00:01:53,280
from this administration
and you're forbidden by law
47
00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:55,382
from entering
the West Wing or EEOB.
48
00:01:55,417 --> 00:01:57,285
Actually, you did not
need to remind me of that.
49
00:01:57,319 --> 00:01:59,387
- I know, but I wanted to.
- Laters.
50
00:01:59,421 --> 00:02:01,022
Wow, he's taking that well.
51
00:02:01,056 --> 00:02:02,991
He's like Spock.
He doesn't show his emotions.
52
00:02:03,025 --> 00:02:04,926
- Ever?
- Ever.
53
00:02:04,961 --> 00:02:06,795
Ever?
54
00:02:06,830 --> 00:02:08,964
- No, not even then.
- You're kidding me.
55
00:02:08,999 --> 00:02:10,533
I saw him laugh once
really hard
56
00:02:10,567 --> 00:02:12,435
when the security guy
fell off his Segway.
57
00:02:13,537 --> 00:02:15,972
Is laughter an emotion?
58
00:02:16,006 --> 00:02:18,141
Full day spa package.
59
00:02:18,175 --> 00:02:19,976
No, I think you'll find
it is possible.
60
00:02:20,044 --> 00:02:21,244
Sue Wilson.
61
00:02:21,279 --> 00:02:23,847
Valued and, if need be,
aggressive client.
62
00:02:23,881 --> 00:02:26,717
Can you set up a lunch with him?
Great.
63
00:02:26,751 --> 00:02:29,119
No, no, no.
Just browsing the store of life.
64
00:02:29,153 --> 00:02:30,887
Section marked "what if."
65
00:02:30,922 --> 00:02:33,156
No, no, network the bejesus...
66
00:02:35,093 --> 00:02:36,593
Network the bejesus out of me.
67
00:02:36,661 --> 00:02:38,996
I want people to be sick
of the sight of my face.
68
00:02:39,030 --> 00:02:40,597
Very funny, Carl.
69
00:02:40,631 --> 00:02:42,666
Gary, I don't know
how to do that.
70
00:02:42,700 --> 00:02:45,234
Oh, ma'am. Oh, oh, oh. Sorry.
71
00:02:45,269 --> 00:02:47,470
Andrew donating to both parties
is all over the blogs.
72
00:02:47,504 --> 00:02:50,239
- Who the hell keeps stirring the shit pot?
- Both: Roger Furlong.
73
00:02:50,307 --> 00:02:52,408
Thought that, too.
So obvious, Furlong.
74
00:02:52,475 --> 00:02:54,243
Wow, it's like anal leakage.
75
00:02:54,277 --> 00:02:56,879
The donations, the shitty
book about me and Andrew
76
00:02:56,913 --> 00:02:58,314
having some sort
of fake relationship,
77
00:02:58,348 --> 00:03:01,016
the land deal
from, like, ages ago.
78
00:03:01,051 --> 00:03:03,885
Somebody bring me the chinless
head of Roger Furlong.
79
00:03:03,920 --> 00:03:06,355
Well, in the acknowledgments,
the author says...
80
00:03:06,389 --> 00:03:08,024
Why do you have a copy of that?
81
00:03:08,058 --> 00:03:09,825
So I can refute it to people.
It's my refuting copy.
82
00:03:09,859 --> 00:03:11,527
Get rid of it.
Refuse it.
83
00:03:11,561 --> 00:03:13,128
Okay, look, if the VP
did have a window,
84
00:03:13,162 --> 00:03:15,130
it'd be a high one and
she'd push you out of it.
85
00:03:15,165 --> 00:03:17,933
- Ooh, that's very good.
- I'm doing my impression of Sue.
86
00:03:17,968 --> 00:03:20,336
- Yeah, that's very good.
- What?
87
00:03:20,370 --> 00:03:23,672
You're pregnant? Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
I did not mean that.
88
00:03:23,707 --> 00:03:26,108
Listen, if you call next week, I
can probably fit you in, okay?
89
00:03:26,143 --> 00:03:27,777
Congratulations.
90
00:03:27,812 --> 00:03:29,345
Jonah:
Well, 'ello, governors.
91
00:03:29,380 --> 00:03:31,748
Pickle me eels
and tickle me belly
92
00:03:31,782 --> 00:03:34,818
'cause I am off
to merry London Town
93
00:03:34,852 --> 00:03:37,020
for a right fuckabout, eh?
94
00:03:37,088 --> 00:03:39,055
Innit, though?
Huh?
95
00:03:39,090 --> 00:03:40,490
Are you going to the G8
conference in London?
96
00:03:40,525 --> 00:03:43,027
Yes, I am, Gary.
Thank you for asking.
97
00:03:43,061 --> 00:03:44,762
Yes, I am.
98
00:03:44,796 --> 00:03:48,065
It is a city where women
are literally drunk all day.
99
00:03:48,100 --> 00:03:51,069
And I am going to mind
their gaps, my friend.
100
00:03:51,103 --> 00:03:54,506
But I need my passport renewed,
so can I speak to the veep?
101
00:03:54,540 --> 00:03:56,608
Why do you need her for that?
102
00:03:56,642 --> 00:03:59,711
Well, cum-for-brains,
the government is shut down,
103
00:03:59,746 --> 00:04:01,780
so all the passport
offices are closed.
104
00:04:01,815 --> 00:04:03,382
So I need Selina
to pull some strings for me.
105
00:04:03,416 --> 00:04:06,251
So get Sue.
106
00:04:06,286 --> 00:04:08,854
Where's Sue?
Where's Sue?
107
00:04:08,888 --> 00:04:11,289
Who's the new Sue?
Me.
108
00:04:12,492 --> 00:04:14,159
Would you like
an appointment, Mr. Ryan?
109
00:04:14,194 --> 00:04:16,929
Uh, yes, new Sue, I would
like to make an appointment.
110
00:04:16,997 --> 00:04:19,165
- Suck it.
- Ha ha!
111
00:04:19,200 --> 00:04:20,700
( Amy chuckles )
112
00:04:22,136 --> 00:04:23,236
Chung:
Look around you.
113
00:04:23,271 --> 00:04:26,172
People out of work.
Garbage in the streets.
114
00:04:26,207 --> 00:04:28,275
Ordinary folks suffering.
115
00:04:28,309 --> 00:04:30,811
Sometimes I feel
I don't know my own party.
116
00:04:30,845 --> 00:04:32,913
See, this is the problem
with high-definition.
117
00:04:32,947 --> 00:04:34,882
You don't want to see
a dick in hi-def.
118
00:04:34,916 --> 00:04:37,117
How can they allow
this shutdown to happen?
119
00:04:37,151 --> 00:04:39,219
Do Washington's
overpaid lawmakers
120
00:04:39,287 --> 00:04:40,921
not care about ordinary people?
121
00:04:40,955 --> 00:04:42,656
What?
I'm not overpaid.
122
00:04:42,690 --> 00:04:45,292
I'm independently wealthy.
All right? Sorry.
123
00:04:45,326 --> 00:04:47,861
They need to cut a deal
and vanquish the stench.
124
00:04:47,895 --> 00:04:51,264
Ma'am, the stench
at your home is gone.
125
00:04:51,298 --> 00:04:53,099
- Thanks to me.
- What?
126
00:04:53,134 --> 00:04:55,902
You know that stinky garbage
outside your home?
127
00:04:55,936 --> 00:04:58,906
I, as Sue, had a private
company take it away.
128
00:04:58,940 --> 00:05:00,941
What?
Why would you do that?
129
00:05:00,975 --> 00:05:02,809
Amy: That was not a
good idea, Gary.
130
00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:04,945
That wasn't the reaction
I was expecting.
131
00:05:04,979 --> 00:05:06,613
Come on, Gary.
Everybody in Garbagetown
132
00:05:06,647 --> 00:05:08,615
has to live with the stink
except for the...
133
00:05:08,649 --> 00:05:12,118
( feminine British accent ) uppity
princess in her perfumed palace.
134
00:05:12,186 --> 00:05:14,120
Is what other people would say.
135
00:05:14,155 --> 00:05:15,889
I'm not saying that.
Not me.
136
00:05:15,923 --> 00:05:17,523
Wait a minute, hold on now.
137
00:05:17,558 --> 00:05:20,192
So now some private contractor
138
00:05:20,260 --> 00:05:21,594
who has not been vetted
139
00:05:21,628 --> 00:05:23,663
could go through
all of my trash
140
00:05:23,697 --> 00:05:25,398
and put it up on the...
141
00:05:25,466 --> 00:05:27,900
on the Internet?
142
00:05:27,935 --> 00:05:29,502
I'm sorry, ma'am.
I didn't mean to do that.
143
00:05:29,536 --> 00:05:31,437
You've got to go and get
the garbage bags back.
144
00:05:31,471 --> 00:05:34,673
Okay. Yes, ma'am. Wait, how am I
gonna know which bags are yours?
145
00:05:36,576 --> 00:05:39,645
Do you want to let me know some of
the things that are in the bags?
146
00:05:39,679 --> 00:05:42,080
Ahem, can I just... can I talk to
you privately just for a second?
147
00:05:42,115 --> 00:05:44,049
Yeah, sure.
148
00:05:46,218 --> 00:05:47,385
- ( Door closes )
- What the...?
149
00:05:47,420 --> 00:05:48,920
- I don't know.
- Fuck.
150
00:06:00,766 --> 00:06:02,233
( Coffee machine beeping )
151
00:06:05,203 --> 00:06:07,038
- Selina: Be quick.
- Yes, ma'am.
152
00:06:10,843 --> 00:06:13,277
Selina: So me and the Speaker,
I think we're gonna end this.
153
00:06:13,312 --> 00:06:15,513
Well, POTUS knows we have
to get out of shutdown ASAP.
154
00:06:15,548 --> 00:06:17,182
It's fucking us all
every which way.
155
00:06:17,216 --> 00:06:19,785
Yeah.
Speaking of which...
156
00:06:19,819 --> 00:06:21,620
Ma'am?
157
00:06:21,654 --> 00:06:25,625
Um, I've been seeing Andrew.
158
00:06:27,061 --> 00:06:28,628
Seeing him?
159
00:06:28,662 --> 00:06:32,299
Like you would see someone for
lunch or a game of cards?
160
00:06:32,334 --> 00:06:34,068
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
161
00:06:34,102 --> 00:06:37,638
I mean, we've been having lunch
and then we've been having sex.
162
00:06:37,706 --> 00:06:39,440
And not really cards so much.
163
00:06:39,474 --> 00:06:41,542
Just, you know,
just, like, sex.
164
00:06:41,576 --> 00:06:43,544
Oh, God, Amy.
Can you tell me what to do?
165
00:06:43,578 --> 00:06:45,046
- Honestly?
- Yeah.
166
00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:48,349
You dump him overboard
like the toxic waste he is.
167
00:06:48,383 --> 00:06:50,718
- He will kill your career.
- Come on, Amy.
168
00:06:50,786 --> 00:06:53,755
It is just so good.
169
00:06:53,789 --> 00:06:56,491
You just have no idea.
And it's stress relief.
170
00:06:56,526 --> 00:06:58,327
You know, endorphins.
171
00:06:58,361 --> 00:07:01,664
Okay, then you see...
see where it goes.
172
00:07:01,698 --> 00:07:04,433
- No, I have to end it.
- Yeah.
173
00:07:04,468 --> 00:07:06,668
But I can't.
174
00:07:06,703 --> 00:07:08,504
( Elevator bell dings )
175
00:07:08,538 --> 00:07:10,940
( Doors open )
176
00:07:10,974 --> 00:07:14,243
( Sighs ) I'm glad we talked.
On the same page.
177
00:07:16,979 --> 00:07:19,180
I don't actually have
to touch the trash, do I?
178
00:07:19,215 --> 00:07:20,849
Yes, you've got to embrace it.
179
00:07:20,883 --> 00:07:22,684
You've got to help me get the
garbage, put it in your car.
180
00:07:22,718 --> 00:07:24,786
We'll take it to the residence and
I'll help you get a passport.
181
00:07:24,820 --> 00:07:26,621
So you're the guys
who want your trash back?
182
00:07:26,655 --> 00:07:28,055
- Yeah. Are you Mr. Walker?
- Yes.
183
00:07:28,090 --> 00:07:29,757
- Hey, I'm Gary Walsh.
- It's a pleasure.
184
00:07:29,791 --> 00:07:32,260
- Jonah Ryan. West Wing.
- Hi.
185
00:07:32,294 --> 00:07:34,262
- So, our trash?
- Your trash?
186
00:07:34,296 --> 00:07:36,097
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- It's mine now.
187
00:07:36,131 --> 00:07:38,833
- Oh.
- So what's my end?
188
00:07:38,867 --> 00:07:40,368
Okay, sir, this is
a government matter,
189
00:07:40,402 --> 00:07:42,536
so it would be best
if you cooperated.
190
00:07:42,571 --> 00:07:44,238
Are you threatening me,
Pez head?
191
00:07:44,272 --> 00:07:46,807
Because we got a compactor
that takes shit
192
00:07:46,842 --> 00:07:48,375
and turns it into cubes.
193
00:07:48,410 --> 00:07:49,910
Okay.
( Laughs )
194
00:07:49,945 --> 00:07:52,379
Could you just excuse us for one moment?
Thank you so much.
195
00:07:52,414 --> 00:07:54,648
( Laughs ) What the hell
are you doing?
196
00:07:54,683 --> 00:07:56,416
We have to offer him something.
197
00:07:56,451 --> 00:07:58,485
Why don't you offer to blow him
over by the recycled glass?
198
00:07:58,520 --> 00:07:59,954
It would throw up some
interesting light effects.
199
00:07:59,988 --> 00:08:01,589
That would be romantic,
wouldn't it?
200
00:08:01,623 --> 00:08:04,091
It's a shame you're
not going to London.
201
00:08:04,126 --> 00:08:06,193
Okay, fine.
You know what?
202
00:08:06,228 --> 00:08:08,062
I'm gonna offer him
a tour of the West Wing.
203
00:08:08,096 --> 00:08:10,130
Civilians love that shit.
204
00:08:10,164 --> 00:08:12,299
They get so hot for it,
I call it the Wet Wing.
205
00:08:12,366 --> 00:08:14,234
- Okay, that's disrespectful.
- It's a building, Gary.
206
00:08:14,268 --> 00:08:16,435
- It doesn't have feelings.
- It has a spirit.
207
00:08:16,503 --> 00:08:20,105
No, it doesn't.
Sir, Mr. Walsh and I
208
00:08:20,140 --> 00:08:21,974
would love to offer you
a private, exclusive tour
209
00:08:22,008 --> 00:08:24,076
of the West Wing
of the White House.
210
00:08:24,110 --> 00:08:25,711
- Sure, that sounds like fun.
- Great.
211
00:08:25,745 --> 00:08:27,179
Oh, wait.
Did I say fun?
212
00:08:27,246 --> 00:08:29,881
I meant like you
think I'm a dick.
213
00:08:29,915 --> 00:08:32,583
( Laughs )
What would you like?
214
00:08:32,618 --> 00:08:35,086
I would like a visit
from the vice president.
215
00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:37,255
- Oh.
- I'd like to have her take a tour.
216
00:08:37,289 --> 00:08:39,157
I think it'd be good
for business.
217
00:08:39,191 --> 00:08:42,193
"Vice president
applauds shit compaction."
218
00:08:43,529 --> 00:08:45,631
Okay, we can do that.
Yeah.
219
00:08:48,768 --> 00:08:50,669
Selina:
Boy, I had forgotten
220
00:08:50,703 --> 00:08:52,070
how nice this office was, Jim.
221
00:08:52,104 --> 00:08:53,638
It is nice, isn't it?
222
00:08:53,673 --> 00:08:55,640
These chairs
are worth a fortune.
223
00:08:55,675 --> 00:08:57,742
- Are they?
- Uncomfortable as hell, though.
224
00:08:57,776 --> 00:08:59,611
- Yeah. Yeah.
- Right?
225
00:08:59,645 --> 00:09:02,547
Well, people in the old days lived
in discomfort most of the time.
226
00:09:02,581 --> 00:09:05,149
- Oh, well, that's true.
- They were laced into their clothing.
227
00:09:05,184 --> 00:09:06,984
Freezing cold or hot as hell.
228
00:09:07,019 --> 00:09:10,288
- Hard chairs and they all stank.
- Tough times. Tough times.
229
00:09:10,322 --> 00:09:13,024
- Yeah, and I'm just talking about the 1970s.
- Okay.
230
00:09:13,059 --> 00:09:15,627
I'm not. I was thinking
of the 18th century.
231
00:09:15,662 --> 00:09:18,764
- The wigs, so on.
- All right.
232
00:09:18,798 --> 00:09:22,401
So I think we're pretty close
on a budget deal here.
233
00:09:22,436 --> 00:09:25,237
I think we just need you
to move a scooch more.
234
00:09:25,271 --> 00:09:27,506
- Oh, I'm not moving.
- You're not moving?
235
00:09:27,540 --> 00:09:30,910
Not with you, ma'am.
You have been hung out to dry.
236
00:09:30,978 --> 00:09:32,645
I just got a call
from "Politico."
237
00:09:32,679 --> 00:09:35,948
They just did an interview with the
president and they called for my reaction.
238
00:09:35,983 --> 00:09:37,750
Just now?
What are you talking about?
239
00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:40,620
- Do you not know? You haven't. All right.
- I have not seen...
240
00:09:40,654 --> 00:09:44,690
I will read the president's
words without inflection.
241
00:09:44,825 --> 00:09:46,826
"Slide to unlock."
242
00:09:46,860 --> 00:09:51,164
"Selina Meyer is a feisty
operator and a fine VP.
243
00:09:51,198 --> 00:09:53,900
She tried her best
to prevent this shutdown,
244
00:09:53,934 --> 00:09:57,203
working long hours,
but it was a tough call."
245
00:09:57,238 --> 00:10:00,774
Subtext, ma'am...
you failed.
246
00:10:00,809 --> 00:10:03,644
And you are being blamed personally
for this government shutdown.
247
00:10:03,678 --> 00:10:06,280
Okay, first of all, I did
not hear that subtext.
248
00:10:06,314 --> 00:10:09,282
I hear text,
and the text that I hear
249
00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:12,686
is a feisty and successful VP.
250
00:10:12,720 --> 00:10:13,921
Oh, I don't think
he said successful.
251
00:10:13,955 --> 00:10:15,556
Oh, I know he said successful.
252
00:10:15,590 --> 00:10:16,757
Well, that wasn't
in those words.
253
00:10:16,791 --> 00:10:18,358
That's what you
just read to me.
254
00:10:18,392 --> 00:10:20,660
- I'm sorry.
- Feel free. Yeah, read it back.
255
00:10:20,694 --> 00:10:22,962
"Selina Meyer is a feisty
operator and a fine VP."
256
00:10:22,996 --> 00:10:25,231
- No successful.
- Fine and successful are synonyms.
257
00:10:25,265 --> 00:10:27,766
- You're grasping at straws.
- I'm not grasping for straws.
258
00:10:27,801 --> 00:10:30,035
What with this
259
00:10:30,069 --> 00:10:32,104
and with all those stories
about your ex-husband,
260
00:10:32,138 --> 00:10:34,072
there's a lot of poison coming
261
00:10:34,107 --> 00:10:37,209
from certain enemy congressmen.
262
00:10:37,244 --> 00:10:39,445
Roger Furlong?
263
00:10:39,479 --> 00:10:41,614
If you say so.
It's all beans to me.
264
00:10:41,648 --> 00:10:45,017
Madam Vice President, you have been
squeezed out of the budget deal.
265
00:10:45,051 --> 00:10:47,953
It's tough, but I don't care.
266
00:10:47,988 --> 00:10:50,056
Now you see why
we have the hard chairs.
267
00:10:50,090 --> 00:10:52,358
Hardly worth you sitting down.
268
00:10:52,392 --> 00:10:54,426
You know, Jim,
269
00:10:54,494 --> 00:10:57,362
you're a lot older than me.
270
00:10:57,397 --> 00:11:00,665
If you die within
the next six years,
271
00:11:00,700 --> 00:11:03,601
I will be attending
your funeral
272
00:11:03,636 --> 00:11:07,839
and giving a eulogy when POTUS
sends me there in his stead.
273
00:11:07,873 --> 00:11:10,775
And it is gonna be
full of subtext.
274
00:11:10,843 --> 00:11:14,379
Chock-full of subtext.
275
00:11:14,447 --> 00:11:17,382
Well, I look forward to that.
Oh, wait, I'll be dead.
276
00:11:17,417 --> 00:11:19,919
Dan: Honestly, Sidney, I'm
looking at being furloughed
277
00:11:19,953 --> 00:11:21,421
- as an opportunity.
- Oh, yeah.
278
00:11:21,455 --> 00:11:24,591
Get out there, touch some
bases, face some faces.
279
00:11:24,725 --> 00:11:26,226
So what you're saying is
your career has stalled.
280
00:11:26,260 --> 00:11:27,928
So now you and your slack pussy
281
00:11:27,962 --> 00:11:30,564
want to make big bucks
as an oil lobbyist, right?
282
00:11:30,598 --> 00:11:31,831
- Welcome, gentlemen.
- Hello.
283
00:11:31,899 --> 00:11:33,099
Today's specials
are the cuttlefish...
284
00:11:33,134 --> 00:11:35,001
Let me stop you
right there, sweetheart.
285
00:11:35,036 --> 00:11:37,504
- You're gonna pick up the tab, right?
- Yes, that's on me.
286
00:11:37,538 --> 00:11:38,839
Great. I'm gonna have
the most expensive starter,
287
00:11:38,873 --> 00:11:42,242
the most expensive entr�e,
and a $200 bottle of champagne.
288
00:11:42,277 --> 00:11:45,579
- Yes, sir.
- You know, I think I'm gonna keep it light.
289
00:11:45,613 --> 00:11:48,515
I'm gonna go chicken
salad and a Diet Coke.
290
00:11:48,550 --> 00:11:50,885
Nonsense. Give him
exactly what I'm having.
291
00:11:50,919 --> 00:11:52,452
And we will split
the champagne.
292
00:11:52,487 --> 00:11:54,454
It's our first date.
293
00:11:56,557 --> 00:12:00,860
My husband was killed 15 yards
from a ranger's station.
294
00:12:00,895 --> 00:12:03,496
This is the most
fucked-up story.
295
00:12:03,530 --> 00:12:05,598
I mean, killed by a bear?
296
00:12:05,633 --> 00:12:08,202
Reporter: No park rangers on
site due to the shutdown.
297
00:12:08,236 --> 00:12:09,303
And a black bear.
That's the weird part.
298
00:12:09,337 --> 00:12:11,105
They rarely attack people.
That's weird.
299
00:12:11,139 --> 00:12:13,775
Right. That's what I was...
then he must have goaded him.
300
00:12:13,809 --> 00:12:17,045
He must have hit him with a
stick or done something stupid.
301
00:12:17,079 --> 00:12:19,047
Taunting him or forcing
the bear to dance.
302
00:12:19,081 --> 00:12:21,383
- Bears don't like to dance.
- Would you dance, please?
303
00:12:21,418 --> 00:12:23,785
- There's not a happy bear in show business.
- Or he tried to fuck the bear.
304
00:12:23,853 --> 00:12:26,656
- Mike: He tried to fuck...
- Like Grizzly Adams.
305
00:12:26,723 --> 00:12:29,025
- Amy: Oh, jeez.
- Enjoying yourselves?
306
00:12:29,059 --> 00:12:30,493
- We were.
- Are you laughing
307
00:12:30,528 --> 00:12:32,328
at the violent death
of a young man?
308
00:12:32,363 --> 00:12:36,166
- Yeah, pretty much.
- I thought you were on furlough, Kent.
309
00:12:36,200 --> 00:12:37,967
Forgot my noise-cancelling
headphones.
310
00:12:38,002 --> 00:12:40,070
Guess what I just heard.
311
00:12:40,104 --> 00:12:42,472
I'm not here.
Ergo, my ears aren't here either.
312
00:12:42,506 --> 00:12:44,975
Okay.
POTUS's quote
313
00:12:45,009 --> 00:12:47,778
in his soon-to-be-released
"Politico" interview
314
00:12:47,812 --> 00:12:51,682
in which he blames me
for the government shutdown.
315
00:12:51,716 --> 00:12:53,116
- What?
- Exactly. What?
316
00:12:53,151 --> 00:12:55,052
- It was implicit.
- Implicit?
317
00:12:55,119 --> 00:12:57,722
Implicit like
a "kick me" sticker
318
00:12:57,756 --> 00:12:59,557
on my keister
would be implicit?
319
00:12:59,591 --> 00:13:01,693
Madam Vice President,
greatest respect,
320
00:13:01,727 --> 00:13:04,262
but it has been the job
of the VP over the ages
321
00:13:04,296 --> 00:13:06,931
to take it in the ass
to save the president.
322
00:13:06,965 --> 00:13:08,232
Yeah, let me
tell you something.
323
00:13:08,266 --> 00:13:10,601
This ass is closed
for business.
324
00:13:10,635 --> 00:13:13,436
This ass is in clench-down.
I don't want to be a decoy.
325
00:13:13,471 --> 00:13:16,072
Let the president take it in the ass.
He might like it.
326
00:13:16,107 --> 00:13:17,874
Woman on TV: These
powerful men and women,
327
00:13:17,908 --> 00:13:20,943
they couldn't agree
on anything.
328
00:13:20,977 --> 00:13:22,678
Selina: You've got
to be kidding me.
329
00:13:22,713 --> 00:13:24,547
Now I'm to blame
because some goober
330
00:13:24,581 --> 00:13:26,282
got all eaten up by a bear?
331
00:13:26,316 --> 00:13:28,150
You've got to get your
press guys on this, okay?
332
00:13:28,185 --> 00:13:31,153
- Yes, ma'am.
- Ma'am, this is in Minnesota, right?
333
00:13:31,187 --> 00:13:33,322
So Governor Chung
is gonna be all over this
334
00:13:33,356 --> 00:13:34,991
- like a bear on an idiot.
- Of course. That's right.
335
00:13:35,025 --> 00:13:37,660
At the very least, let's
get in front of something
336
00:13:37,694 --> 00:13:39,529
and get in touch
with this widow.
337
00:13:39,563 --> 00:13:41,665
- Yeah. Did you hear that, Mike?
- Uh-uh.
338
00:13:41,699 --> 00:13:43,300
The bear widow.
Get in touch with the bear widow.
339
00:13:43,334 --> 00:13:44,668
As well as get in touch
with the press guys?
340
00:13:44,702 --> 00:13:46,235
Yeah, as well as get
in touch with the press guys.
341
00:13:46,270 --> 00:13:48,337
Two things. Call the "Guinness
Book of World Records."
342
00:13:48,372 --> 00:13:51,173
Oh, no, no, don't, don't, because
that would be three things.
343
00:13:52,609 --> 00:13:54,609
So you're really not
gonna eat that lobster?
344
00:13:54,644 --> 00:13:55,644
Oh, no, I hate lobster.
345
00:13:55,678 --> 00:13:58,112
You know, Dan,
we could use you.
346
00:13:58,147 --> 00:13:59,614
How do you feel about swindling
347
00:13:59,648 --> 00:14:02,383
a bunch of sister fuckers
out of their land in Nebraska?
348
00:14:02,417 --> 00:14:05,019
We're trying to skirt a
pipeline through their backyard
349
00:14:05,054 --> 00:14:06,688
and they're not a fan
for some reason.
350
00:14:06,722 --> 00:14:08,456
You want to get rid
of some farm folk, huh?
351
00:14:08,490 --> 00:14:11,359
Consider me your well-groomed
dust bowl, my friend.
352
00:14:11,393 --> 00:14:13,661
Hey, ooh!
Boy, you made it twitch.
353
00:14:13,696 --> 00:14:15,530
But if you really want
to make my dick dance,
354
00:14:15,564 --> 00:14:17,866
why don't you tell me what's
going on in the VP's office?
355
00:14:19,702 --> 00:14:22,905
Well, you know, I can't
really be too specific.
356
00:14:22,939 --> 00:14:24,406
Sure, sure.
No, we can...
357
00:14:24,441 --> 00:14:26,409
why don't we come up
with some kind of code?
358
00:14:26,443 --> 00:14:29,479
Here, the VP will be
the lobster.
359
00:14:29,513 --> 00:14:32,015
Amy, greens.
We'll call Mike carrots.
360
00:14:32,049 --> 00:14:33,349
Dan, you can be shrimp.
361
00:14:33,384 --> 00:14:35,618
Do you see what I did there, Dan?
I made you shrimp.
362
00:14:35,653 --> 00:14:38,755
Boy, I just wish I ordered
a plate of useless assholes.
363
00:14:38,789 --> 00:14:41,858
But you go to war with
the army you have, right?
364
00:14:41,893 --> 00:14:43,727
Okay, I think the lobster
365
00:14:43,761 --> 00:14:45,696
is getting back together
with her ex-husband.
366
00:14:45,730 --> 00:14:49,299
The greens are only
barely keeping it together.
367
00:14:49,334 --> 00:14:53,737
Mike... the carrots
are drowning in debt.
368
00:14:53,772 --> 00:14:57,708
And this little shrimp wants to
hear more about this Nebraska deal.
369
00:14:57,743 --> 00:14:59,611
( Laughs ) Want to go
to the corn belt, do you?
370
00:14:59,645 --> 00:15:01,446
I want to hit it.
I want to hit it hard for you.
371
00:15:01,480 --> 00:15:03,648
Well, tap your
ruby slippers together
372
00:15:03,683 --> 00:15:06,184
and wake the fuck up.
There is no job, Dorothy.
373
00:15:06,218 --> 00:15:08,453
But I'm very impressed
that you would turn on
374
00:15:08,487 --> 00:15:11,189
all of your compadres there in
the vice president's office.
375
00:15:11,224 --> 00:15:14,592
So why don't you take your little vanilla
Thriller dance over to Danny Chung?
376
00:15:14,627 --> 00:15:18,329
He's the shiny turd rising to
the top of the bowl right now.
377
00:15:18,363 --> 00:15:20,264
You like turds, don't you, Dan?
378
00:15:20,299 --> 00:15:23,234
Yeah.
No, no, no, no.
379
00:15:23,268 --> 00:15:25,836
That's really not what I meant.
You misunderstood, honestly.
380
00:15:25,871 --> 00:15:29,640
When I said fault, I meant that
it wasn't your husband's fault
381
00:15:29,707 --> 00:15:33,143
because bears
are naturally hungry.
382
00:15:33,210 --> 00:15:35,078
Does that make sense?
383
00:15:35,112 --> 00:15:37,580
Hello?
Hello?
384
00:15:38,783 --> 00:15:40,416
Oh, was that
Mrs. Doolittle?
385
00:15:40,451 --> 00:15:41,951
- Yeah.
- And?
386
00:15:42,019 --> 00:15:43,886
- Very emotional.
- Well, of course.
387
00:15:43,920 --> 00:15:45,788
Yeah.
388
00:15:45,822 --> 00:15:47,656
What?
Oh, Jesus.
389
00:15:47,691 --> 00:15:49,525
All right, Amy, we're
gonna have to get Dan
390
00:15:49,559 --> 00:15:51,795
to go to Minnesota,
do some widow work.
391
00:15:51,829 --> 00:15:54,731
- Dan's on furlough.
- Yeah, I know he's fucking furloughed
392
00:15:54,766 --> 00:15:56,333
because I'm the fucker
who furloughed him.
393
00:15:56,367 --> 00:15:58,401
And by the way, where is Gary?
394
00:15:58,436 --> 00:15:59,936
He's still getting the garbage.
395
00:15:59,971 --> 00:16:01,438
Well, okay,
if he's not back soon,
396
00:16:01,539 --> 00:16:03,240
we're gonna have
to unenfurlough Sue.
397
00:16:03,274 --> 00:16:04,641
Unenfur...
398
00:16:04,675 --> 00:16:06,309
- we'll have to get Sue back.
- Amy: Okay.
399
00:16:06,343 --> 00:16:09,112
Yeah. And I want to
meet with Furlong.
400
00:16:12,116 --> 00:16:13,649
It's not happening.
I'm not getting in there.
401
00:16:13,684 --> 00:16:14,951
Unbelievable.
402
00:16:15,019 --> 00:16:16,987
Oh, God!
403
00:16:17,021 --> 00:16:20,256
Oh, please. Please.
You think this is bad?
404
00:16:20,291 --> 00:16:23,760
Wait till you get to London.
Everything smells like urine.
405
00:16:23,827 --> 00:16:25,394
Even the food.
406
00:16:25,462 --> 00:16:27,296
Okay, found it.
407
00:16:27,330 --> 00:16:29,198
- How do you know it's hers?
- Shut up. I found it.
408
00:16:32,402 --> 00:16:35,538
Selina: Oh, my God,
that pizza was good.
409
00:16:35,573 --> 00:16:37,374
You know, I don't eat
pizza very much, Roger.
410
00:16:37,408 --> 00:16:40,543
But when I do, it just
makes me so fucking happy.
411
00:16:40,578 --> 00:16:43,713
- Thank the Chinese for that.
- What?
412
00:16:43,748 --> 00:16:45,682
- The Chinese invented pizza.
- No, they didn't.
413
00:16:45,750 --> 00:16:47,750
- Yeah, they did.
- Listen, Roger,
414
00:16:47,785 --> 00:16:50,419
let's talk about all these
stories going around
415
00:16:50,454 --> 00:16:53,523
about Andrew's land deal
and our relationship.
416
00:16:53,557 --> 00:16:56,191
Oh, my God, all these
whispers, these rumors.
417
00:16:56,226 --> 00:16:57,793
Who knows where
any of that's coming from?
418
00:16:57,827 --> 00:17:00,762
The point is there's boxes and
boxes of this stuff out there.
419
00:17:00,797 --> 00:17:02,464
- I know that. That's a fact.
- Uh-huh.
420
00:17:02,498 --> 00:17:05,100
That's as much a fact
as Will's impotence.
421
00:17:05,135 --> 00:17:07,236
I don't think
that's appropriate.
422
00:17:07,304 --> 00:17:08,771
He doesn't mind.
Do you, Will?
423
00:17:08,806 --> 00:17:10,073
Whatever works, sir.
424
00:17:10,107 --> 00:17:12,042
- Right, see? Team player.
- Yeah.
425
00:17:12,077 --> 00:17:16,413
Yeah, I got a pretty impressive
deck of cards here, ma'am.
426
00:17:16,448 --> 00:17:17,882
No kidding.
I love to play cards.
427
00:17:17,916 --> 00:17:19,250
- Do you?
- Yeah.
428
00:17:19,284 --> 00:17:21,152
- What's your favorite game?
- Shanghai.
429
00:17:21,186 --> 00:17:23,588
I would have guessed Old Maid.
430
00:17:23,622 --> 00:17:25,323
- Want to play Go Fish?
- Sure.
431
00:17:25,357 --> 00:17:27,125
- Why don't you lay 'em out?
- All right.
432
00:17:27,159 --> 00:17:29,694
Queen.
The boxes I just mentioned.
433
00:17:29,728 --> 00:17:31,229
- Uh-huh.
- Boxes full of dirt.
434
00:17:31,263 --> 00:17:33,899
- Right.
- Explosive dirt. Hurty dirt.
435
00:17:33,933 --> 00:17:36,635
Yeah, you can start calling me
the Hurty Dirty Man.
436
00:17:36,669 --> 00:17:38,170
Yeah, I'm not
gonna call you that.
437
00:17:38,204 --> 00:17:39,938
- All right.
- ( Laughs )
438
00:17:39,973 --> 00:17:42,207
I'm not.
What's your king?
439
00:17:42,242 --> 00:17:43,943
Could be Chung time.
440
00:17:43,977 --> 00:17:45,711
Everybody Dan Chung tonight.
441
00:17:45,746 --> 00:17:47,447
Danny likes boxes.
442
00:17:48,482 --> 00:17:50,050
And then?
443
00:17:50,084 --> 00:17:52,452
Well, I can't
predict the future.
444
00:17:52,487 --> 00:17:54,220
Ooh!
( Laughs )
445
00:17:54,255 --> 00:17:58,024
Roger Furlong, look
at you being all coy.
446
00:17:58,059 --> 00:17:59,759
- ( Laughs )
- You are, man.
447
00:17:59,794 --> 00:18:02,029
You're a coy boy.
So what?
448
00:18:02,063 --> 00:18:04,665
You'd make some sort of a deal with him?
Is that what you're thinking?
449
00:18:04,699 --> 00:18:08,234
For some sort of senior
position in his administration?
450
00:18:08,269 --> 00:18:10,202
- Stranger things have happened.
- Uh-huh.
451
00:18:10,237 --> 00:18:11,737
Stranger things could happen.
452
00:18:11,771 --> 00:18:13,739
- Boom.
- Boom.
453
00:18:13,774 --> 00:18:15,441
You want to make
a deal with me?
454
00:18:15,475 --> 00:18:17,910
Have a place in my
future administration?
455
00:18:17,944 --> 00:18:20,879
Wow, that came out of
nowhere, didn't it, Will?
456
00:18:20,914 --> 00:18:24,115
It's like a sudden
monsoon in Goa, sir.
457
00:18:24,150 --> 00:18:27,852
Sudden monsoon. They predict those
things weeks in advance, you idiot.
458
00:18:29,355 --> 00:18:30,855
Hey, did you ever see
"Silence of the Lambs"?
459
00:18:30,890 --> 00:18:34,559
Oh, yeah. That scared the
living shit out of me.
460
00:18:34,593 --> 00:18:37,729
I know, it's hard to believe that
they have female FBI agents.
461
00:18:37,763 --> 00:18:39,031
- Oh!
- I'm kidding.
462
00:18:39,065 --> 00:18:40,399
I'm kidding.
I'm kidding.
463
00:18:40,466 --> 00:18:42,468
( Laughs ) I love that kind
of misogyny.
464
00:18:42,502 --> 00:18:45,004
- I love misogyny like that.
- Yeah, it's the best kind.
465
00:18:45,038 --> 00:18:46,539
Well, anyway,
the point is you got
466
00:18:46,573 --> 00:18:48,241
- these two characters, right?
- Right.
467
00:18:48,275 --> 00:18:51,077
That seem to be so different, but
they can come to an understanding
468
00:18:51,111 --> 00:18:52,645
and they can actually
work together.
469
00:18:52,680 --> 00:18:54,614
You know what?
You make such a good point.
470
00:18:54,648 --> 00:18:56,583
You make such a good point.
471
00:18:56,617 --> 00:19:00,386
Ahem.
Just to be clear, Roger,
472
00:19:00,421 --> 00:19:02,922
you're not asking for anything
473
00:19:02,956 --> 00:19:05,858
and I'm not agreeing
to anything.
474
00:19:05,892 --> 00:19:07,593
Okay.
475
00:19:07,627 --> 00:19:10,696
Obviously, I can't say
anything explicitly.
476
00:19:10,730 --> 00:19:13,533
Neither can you.
You understand that?
477
00:19:13,634 --> 00:19:15,635
Will, do I understand?
478
00:19:16,570 --> 00:19:17,970
Yes, you do, sir.
479
00:19:19,172 --> 00:19:20,606
Did you hear
what we said, Will?
480
00:19:20,641 --> 00:19:23,009
No, ma'am.
481
00:19:23,043 --> 00:19:24,510
- Team player.
- Yeah.
482
00:19:24,545 --> 00:19:26,145
- I like it.
- Yeah.
483
00:19:26,180 --> 00:19:28,681
All right, she's on her way, so
we'll just put this in her car.
484
00:19:28,716 --> 00:19:31,818
- Did you check the oil?
- No. Who the fuck checks their oil?
485
00:19:31,852 --> 00:19:33,920
- Everyone.
- ( Horn honks )
486
00:19:33,955 --> 00:19:36,056
- Oh, hey, Sue's here.
- Oh, thank God.
487
00:19:36,090 --> 00:19:38,625
- Thanks, Sue.
- You're welcome, Gary.
488
00:19:38,659 --> 00:19:39,659
- Hi, Shaun.
- Hey, gentlemen.
489
00:19:39,694 --> 00:19:40,828
- Nice to see you.
- Sue, grab a bag.
490
00:19:40,862 --> 00:19:42,663
We're gonna be
the shitty Sopranos.
491
00:19:42,697 --> 00:19:44,298
Just don't get
any mess on my dress.
492
00:19:44,332 --> 00:19:46,933
My mess on your dress.
I like this... sorry.
493
00:19:46,968 --> 00:19:48,602
You're paying to have
my car cleaned after this.
494
00:19:48,636 --> 00:19:50,537
Okay, first, no touching.
Thank you. And I'm not.
495
00:19:50,571 --> 00:19:52,405
Sue: Okay, come on.
Let's get this over with.
496
00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:54,541
Oh, God, there's no way
I'm gonna fit in here.
497
00:19:54,575 --> 00:19:57,811
It's bigger than your mother's womb and
you were in there till you were 15.
498
00:19:57,846 --> 00:20:00,381
- Gary: Oh, my God.
- There you go.
499
00:20:00,415 --> 00:20:02,483
Oh, God, I'm touching it.
500
00:20:02,518 --> 00:20:04,152
Gary: Something's wet.
Something's wet.
501
00:20:04,186 --> 00:20:05,787
- Ugh, okay.
- Jonah: It got on my ID badge.
502
00:20:05,821 --> 00:20:07,856
- Shaun: Watch your legs, Lurch.
- Sue: All right, guys.
503
00:20:07,890 --> 00:20:11,794
- Jonah: Who buys a coupe?
- Sue: Oh, gross.
504
00:20:13,763 --> 00:20:16,331
People will say
he shouldn't have been there.
505
00:20:16,366 --> 00:20:18,367
But he's dead, for God's sake.
506
00:20:18,401 --> 00:20:20,102
- I know.
- ( Crying )
507
00:20:20,136 --> 00:20:21,770
I know. I know.
I know.
508
00:20:21,805 --> 00:20:25,441
I keep thinking
about his last moments.
509
00:20:25,476 --> 00:20:27,176
Yeah.
510
00:20:27,211 --> 00:20:29,445
Chung: So how is the
widow holding up?
511
00:20:29,480 --> 00:20:32,716
She's crying a lot.
Like a shitload a lot.
512
00:20:32,750 --> 00:20:35,218
She's upset.
Husband eaten, et cetera.
513
00:20:35,252 --> 00:20:37,453
She's a big fan of yours, though.
You should talk to her.
514
00:20:37,488 --> 00:20:40,856
I don't know.
It could look opportunistic.
515
00:20:40,890 --> 00:20:43,993
But heroes don't get to
choose, they get chosen.
516
00:20:44,027 --> 00:20:47,430
Speaking of chosen,
how is Dan.com/Egan?
517
00:20:47,464 --> 00:20:49,833
- I'm still a fan.
- And you should be, Danny.
518
00:20:49,867 --> 00:20:51,634
- I'm fucking awesome.
- You are.
519
00:20:51,669 --> 00:20:54,671
Sadly, though, Selina and Kent
Davison are blind to my destiny.
520
00:20:54,705 --> 00:20:56,606
See, they're thinking
like it's the 1990s.
521
00:20:56,641 --> 00:20:58,709
I'm thinking like
it's the 2020s.
522
00:20:58,743 --> 00:21:00,077
You got 20/20 vision, huh?
523
00:21:00,111 --> 00:21:01,178
- Zowie!
- You like that?
524
00:21:01,212 --> 00:21:03,113
See, I need more
of that on my team.
525
00:21:03,148 --> 00:21:04,648
You offering me a job?
526
00:21:04,682 --> 00:21:07,150
I don't have any immediate
vacancies, but I will.
527
00:21:07,185 --> 00:21:09,185
In six years' time, you and me,
528
00:21:09,220 --> 00:21:11,454
Oval Office ordering
a pizza and an air strike.
529
00:21:11,488 --> 00:21:13,823
Thin crust, extra warheads.
530
00:21:13,857 --> 00:21:17,026
Get the Rolling Stones to perform
in my fucking living room.
531
00:21:17,060 --> 00:21:18,227
( Both laugh )
532
00:21:18,261 --> 00:21:20,296
20/20, yo.
533
00:21:21,465 --> 00:21:24,099
( Phone ringing )
534
00:21:25,469 --> 00:21:28,870
- Ma'am?
- Dan, your 15 minutes of furlough are over.
535
00:21:28,905 --> 00:21:31,372
I need you back.
To the Bastardmobile.
536
00:21:31,407 --> 00:21:32,840
Yeah.
537
00:21:35,611 --> 00:21:37,811
You know, I didn't realize
how good I was at this job
538
00:21:37,845 --> 00:21:39,580
until someone else
did it so badly.
539
00:21:39,614 --> 00:21:41,748
- Different isn't bad.
- No, bad is bad.
540
00:21:41,782 --> 00:21:44,250
Okay, so what do we got
on the deck for today?
541
00:21:44,284 --> 00:21:45,651
We got that NASA meeting?
542
00:21:45,686 --> 00:21:47,186
No, it looks like the NASA
guys had to reschedule.
543
00:21:47,221 --> 00:21:49,455
Aw, crap.
I wanted to meet the NASA guys.
544
00:21:49,489 --> 00:21:51,224
Gary, they don't even walk
on the moon anymore.
545
00:21:51,258 --> 00:21:53,193
They're basically a bunch
of nerds who work in a hangar.
546
00:21:53,227 --> 00:21:54,961
So what do we got instead?
547
00:21:55,062 --> 00:21:57,364
You have a visit to the waste
management plant in Fairfax.
548
00:21:57,398 --> 00:22:00,934
Okay, I don't know what is the most
depressing word in that sentence.
549
00:22:00,968 --> 00:22:02,869
All you got to do is go
meet the garbage guys.
550
00:22:02,903 --> 00:22:05,505
You know, make it look like you're getting
your hands dirty with the common man.
551
00:22:05,540 --> 00:22:06,840
Get some pictures
for the press.
552
00:22:06,875 --> 00:22:08,909
A nice little puff piece.
I set it up.
553
00:22:08,944 --> 00:22:11,512
- You're furloughed, Mike.
- Without pay?
554
00:22:11,546 --> 00:22:14,315
Yeah, that's how it works.
Go sign the paperwork on Amy's desk.
555
00:22:14,349 --> 00:22:15,883
Try renting out
your fucking boat.
556
00:22:15,917 --> 00:22:17,585
Ma'am, look, I had
no choice in this.
557
00:22:17,619 --> 00:22:19,454
Gary's the one who promised
the garbage guy a visit.
558
00:22:19,488 --> 00:22:22,557
Gary wouldn't do something
that idiotic, would you, Gary?
559
00:22:22,592 --> 00:22:26,796
Well, under certain circumstances,
a garbage service...
560
00:22:26,830 --> 00:22:28,297
Selina: Ah!
561
00:22:28,331 --> 00:22:29,765
Yeah, no, no.
I get it.
562
00:22:29,799 --> 00:22:32,168
- I understand now.
- Yeah. Whew.
563
00:22:32,202 --> 00:22:33,569
- Hey, Gary.
- Yeah?
564
00:22:33,603 --> 00:22:34,804
- You're furloughed.
- No!
565
00:22:34,838 --> 00:22:35,971
I'm sorry.
I got Sue.
566
00:22:36,006 --> 00:22:37,606
( Sighs )
No.
567
00:22:37,641 --> 00:22:39,441
You got to sign
the paperwork on Amy's desk.
568
00:22:39,475 --> 00:22:41,743
- ( Knocks )
- Ma'am?
569
00:22:41,778 --> 00:22:45,380
Gary mentioned you might be able to
get my passport renewal fast-tracked.
570
00:22:45,414 --> 00:22:48,750
Okay, Gary, get out.
Go fuck yourself, Jonah.
571
00:22:48,785 --> 00:22:50,552
Ma'am, I'm G8 advance team.
572
00:22:50,586 --> 00:22:53,021
Go, period, fuck, period,
573
00:22:53,055 --> 00:22:54,823
yourself, exclamation point.
574
00:22:54,857 --> 00:22:56,558
But, ma'am, I helped
with the garbage.
575
00:22:57,727 --> 00:23:00,162
( Quietly )
Oh, you helped with the...
576
00:23:00,197 --> 00:23:01,864
with the garbage?
577
00:23:02,966 --> 00:23:04,867
Yeah, I helped
with the garbage.
578
00:23:06,070 --> 00:23:07,804
- Um, Sue.
- Yeah?
579
00:23:07,838 --> 00:23:09,339
Could you get in touch
580
00:23:09,373 --> 00:23:11,941
with what's-his-fuck
at the State Department?
581
00:23:11,976 --> 00:23:14,010
A doff of the cap
to you, my lady.
582
00:23:14,044 --> 00:23:15,511
- Amy: Ma'am.
- Yeah?
583
00:23:15,579 --> 00:23:18,448
Did you just furlough Gary and
Mike when I was in the bathroom?
584
00:23:18,483 --> 00:23:22,252
I did. So Sue's the new Gary
and you are still the Amy.
585
00:23:22,287 --> 00:23:23,387
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
586
00:23:23,421 --> 00:23:25,923
Hey, hey.
What have I missed?
587
00:23:25,957 --> 00:23:28,059
She is furloughing
indiscriminately into the crowd.
588
00:23:28,093 --> 00:23:30,595
Uh, Amy, a quick word.
589
00:23:35,501 --> 00:23:37,468
Please don't tell me
you got it on with the widow.
590
00:23:37,503 --> 00:23:40,972
Tell me honestly.
Where do you think Selina's heading?
591
00:23:41,006 --> 00:23:43,308
What's making you doubt her?
592
00:23:43,342 --> 00:23:45,978
Land deal shit, fake relationship
shit, shutdown shit.
593
00:23:46,012 --> 00:23:48,080
You left out that she just did
a deal with Roger Furlong
594
00:23:48,114 --> 00:23:50,783
and is becoming semidependent
on antidepressants.
595
00:23:50,850 --> 00:23:52,918
Oh, well, what could
possibly go wrong?
596
00:23:54,420 --> 00:23:55,787
Selina:
Okay, Sue, let's go.
597
00:23:55,822 --> 00:23:58,056
Ma'am, I am so sorry
598
00:23:58,090 --> 00:23:59,324
that I could not
get you the widow.
599
00:23:59,358 --> 00:24:01,793
Yeah, that was what I would
call a massive fuckup.
600
00:24:01,827 --> 00:24:03,995
- Yeah.
- Well, the newspapers are suggesting
601
00:24:04,029 --> 00:24:07,398
that I am responsible for the
grisly death of some idiot.
602
00:24:07,432 --> 00:24:09,233
But I'm on my way
to a garbage dump,
603
00:24:09,301 --> 00:24:11,168
so that's a positive, right?
604
00:24:11,203 --> 00:24:12,636
Well, that's a good
attitude to have.
605
00:24:12,671 --> 00:24:14,204
Amy, why is everybody else
606
00:24:14,239 --> 00:24:15,639
in charge of my image
except me?
607
00:24:15,673 --> 00:24:18,008
- We've got to do something, Amy.
- Okay.
608
00:24:18,042 --> 00:24:20,476
Ma'am, the dump has a contaminated
sludge delivery at 10:15,
609
00:24:20,511 --> 00:24:21,944
so we have
a very limited window.
610
00:24:21,979 --> 00:24:24,313
Okay, I just...
I just want to think...
611
00:24:24,347 --> 00:24:27,783
we just need to think with
our heads for a minute.
612
00:24:29,151 --> 00:24:30,385
Maybe get me on TV?
613
00:24:30,419 --> 00:24:32,121
Well, we don't want
to do "First Response"
614
00:24:32,155 --> 00:24:33,956
with Janet Ryland
or anything, but I mean...
615
00:24:33,990 --> 00:24:37,259
Oh.
Oh, yeah.
616
00:24:37,294 --> 00:24:39,195
Yeah, that's a great idea.
617
00:24:39,229 --> 00:24:40,430
That's precisely
what I want to do, Dan.
618
00:24:40,464 --> 00:24:42,365
- Good.
- Oh, okay, then, yes. Exactly.
619
00:24:42,399 --> 00:24:43,666
You know what?
The more I think about it,
620
00:24:43,701 --> 00:24:45,869
she actually might be
exactly what we want to do.
621
00:24:45,903 --> 00:24:48,304
She's respected,
but she's not dangerous.
622
00:24:48,339 --> 00:24:49,973
She's staid, she's stately.
623
00:24:50,007 --> 00:24:52,275
She's old and cold
624
00:24:52,310 --> 00:24:54,244
and I'm warm and...
625
00:24:54,278 --> 00:24:56,747
- Young?
- Young, exactly.
626
00:24:56,781 --> 00:24:58,448
And I'm a mother.
627
00:24:58,483 --> 00:24:59,950
So we should
round up Catherine,
628
00:24:59,984 --> 00:25:01,284
at gunpoint, if we have to.
629
00:25:01,319 --> 00:25:03,420
And maybe Andrew.
630
00:25:03,454 --> 00:25:05,021
Yeah?
631
00:25:05,056 --> 00:25:07,791
Honestly, all of America
will be watching.
632
00:25:07,825 --> 00:25:10,761
If it doesn't land, then this could
be the end to this whole adventure.
633
00:25:10,795 --> 00:25:12,229
( Laughs )
Come on. Come on.
634
00:25:12,263 --> 00:25:14,198
- Melodrama queen.
- Sue: Tick tock, tick tock.
635
00:25:14,232 --> 00:25:16,868
- Sludge time.
- Yeah. This is gonna be a great idea.
636
00:25:16,902 --> 00:25:19,637
So call "First Response,"
get this thing underway.
637
00:25:19,671 --> 00:25:21,239
We've got to unenfurlough
Mike and Gary.
638
00:25:21,273 --> 00:25:23,542
- Unfurlough.
- That's what I just said, Amy.
639
00:25:23,576 --> 00:25:27,046
Okay? So let's just throw as
many bodies at this as we can.
640
00:25:27,080 --> 00:25:28,614
That's what we're gonna do.
641
00:25:30,751 --> 00:25:33,420
You may want to wear this mask
in case the wind changes.
642
00:25:33,454 --> 00:25:34,855
Oh, really?
No, I don't think so.
643
00:25:34,889 --> 00:25:37,057
I think...
mm, yeah, okay.
644
00:25:37,091 --> 00:25:39,393
That's not a bad idea,
actually.
645
00:25:39,461 --> 00:25:40,828
It's great to meet you, Janine.
646
00:25:40,863 --> 00:25:43,665
Your bravery has been
an inspiration for us all.
647
00:25:43,699 --> 00:25:46,701
Now look, ma'am, I've allotted
exactly three minutes
648
00:25:46,769 --> 00:25:48,570
- for small talk, during which...
- Okay, thank you, Sue.
649
00:25:48,604 --> 00:25:50,205
Then after that,
there's a maximum
650
00:25:50,239 --> 00:25:51,940
- of 10 minutes for glass...
- That's enough, Sue.
651
00:25:51,975 --> 00:25:53,342
There are cameras.
There are cameras here.
652
00:25:53,376 --> 00:25:55,811
If there's anything I can do...
653
00:25:55,879 --> 00:25:58,447
It is so nice to hear
someone say that.
654
00:25:58,482 --> 00:26:00,917
Chung: If you need
it, you got it.
655
00:26:00,985 --> 00:26:03,152
God bless you.
656
00:26:03,187 --> 00:26:05,822
This wildlife in the area,
657
00:26:05,856 --> 00:26:08,525
I wonder how it's impacted
by this very facility.
658
00:26:08,559 --> 00:26:11,828
We get a lot of rats,
if that's what you mean.
659
00:26:11,862 --> 00:26:14,897
Oh, well, that makes sense, doesn't it?
Of course, yeah.
660
00:26:14,932 --> 00:26:17,266
And he served in the Coast
Guard, is that right?
661
00:26:17,300 --> 00:26:18,867
Yes, sir.
662
00:26:18,902 --> 00:26:21,636
It would have been a mighty
privilege to have known him.
663
00:26:21,671 --> 00:26:24,973
And I'm sure you know, Joe,
664
00:26:25,007 --> 00:26:28,410
that nationally
we spend about $71
665
00:26:28,444 --> 00:26:30,812
per ton of waste on recycling
666
00:26:30,846 --> 00:26:33,981
while we spend $86
per ton on collection.
667
00:26:34,016 --> 00:26:36,584
Do you find this
divergence troubling?
668
00:26:37,586 --> 00:26:39,087
Ma'am,
I-I just shovel it.
669
00:26:39,121 --> 00:26:42,390
- I don't account for it.
- Okay. ( Chuckles )
670
00:26:42,425 --> 00:26:44,693
This doesn't look
great, does it?
671
00:26:44,727 --> 00:26:46,994
Depends on which
channel you're watching.
672
00:26:47,029 --> 00:26:50,364
I think we can all learn from the
incredible strength you've shown.
673
00:26:50,399 --> 00:26:53,200
- Are you married, Joe?
- Yes.
674
00:26:53,268 --> 00:26:54,969
Ah, that's lovely.
675
00:26:55,270 --> 00:27:00,089
Sync and corrected by Elderfel
www.addic7ed.com53401
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.