Original subtitles

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- I think it's adorable, I'll take it.

- Well I'm glad you like it,

here you see it's the latest model.

- Can you deliver it right away?

- Right away, madam. - You see, it's

my husband's birthday and I want to surprise him.

- Oh I understand and the address please?

- 1127 Walnut Avenue. - 1127 Walnut Avenue.

- Whoa, pardon me Mr. Postman.

- Yes, sir? - Could you tell

me where 1127 Walnut Avenue is?

- 1127 Walnut Avenue? - Yes, sir.

- That's the house up there, right on top

of the stoop. - That's the house

up there, right on top of the stoop.

Steady, Susie.

Just a moment, this requires a little thought.

Now, ease it down on my back.

Oh, get this off my back.

Ugh! Ugh! ow!

Why don't you be careful, oh come on.

Oh now heave-ho!

Wait a minute, that's it, heave, ho.

Heave, ho.

Heave, ho.

Heave, ho.

Heave, ho.

- Would you gentlemen please let me pass?

- Why certainly ma'am, why just a moment.

Why, just a moment, maybe I can help you.

Of all the dumb things.

Oh!

And not only that, he kicked me.

- He kicked you? - Yes, officer,

right in the middle of my daily duties.

- Oh, he kicked you did he?

Heave, ho.

- Hey you! - What?

- Come here! - Go down

and see what he wants. - You go down see

what he wants. - Don't argue with me.

Go see what the man wants.

- I'm not argue. - Go ahead.

- What do you want? - Go down

and see what he wants.

- What? - I don't want you.

I want that other monkey.

- What? - He don't want me.

He wants the other monkey, you!

Oh.

Whoa!

Whoa!

Oh!

- Hey, what do you mean by molesting that girl?

- Who, me? - Yes, you.

- Why, I was just-- - Now let that

be a lesson to you. - Are you going

to stand for that? - Say listen, if

he'd a said one more word to me I would have--

- Now let that be another lesson to ya.

- Say listen, don't you think you're bounding

over your steps? - What do

you mean, bounding over my steps?

- Why, he means up overstepping your bounds.

Oh now let that be a lesson to you.

Heave, ho.

Heave, ho.

Heave, ho, heave, ho, heave, ho.

Well?

When are you two numbskulls going to

take this thing out of the way?

- What's it to you? - I should like to pass!

- Why don't you walk around? - What, walk around?

Me, Professor Theodore von Schwarzenhoffer?

MD, AD, DDS, FLD, FFF and F,

should walk around? Get that thing out of my way!

Get it out of my way, come on,

get it out of the way, out of the way.

Very lovely, I'll have you arrested for this.

I'll have you thrown in jail.

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

Ollie. - What?

- I can't make it. - Don't weaken now.

We've only got a couple more steps, now both together.

Heave. - Ho.

Come here!

- Did you fellas carry that piano all the way

up these stairs, you didn't have to do that.

You see that road down there?

All you had--

All you had to do was to drive

around that road to the top here.

- Now why didn't we think of that before?

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

- Heave. - Ho.

Whoa!

Just a moment.

- Well I guess we'll have to take it back.

- Why? - There's nobody home.

- Where there's a will there's a way.

We'll take the piano through the window,

carry it down the stairs, and place it

in the living room, you find a ladder

and I'll get the block and tackle.

Mm, mm, mm.

Ow!

Why don't you watch what you're doing?

Ow!

- Hey Ollie. - What?

- There's somebody home. - Are they up there?

- No, I heard him coming up the stairs.

You heard him coming up, why, stupid, that was me!

- That was you? - Why certainly.

- Well, how'd you get in the house?

- Well, I was standing on the ladder

while you were pulling the piano up

and the block and tack-- get back in there.

Throw me my hat!

Heard him coming up the stairs.

What is it now? - You got my hat.

- Here, now throw me mine.

Now get back in that house

and I don't want to hear anymore out of you.

Ow, ooh, ooh, ooh!

Where'd you get the hat?

Now let's get this piano downstairs!

Get that piano out of there

while I find a place to put it.

I'll get it out

Oh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh!

Ow, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, oh!

Get out of here, get that piano out of that box.

Oh!

What were you doing up there? - I was trying

to plug it in. - That's not

the place to plug it in, give it to me.

Oh!

- And if I see 'em, I'll run 'em in.

- Thank you officer.

- Now let's get this place cleaned up.

Oh!

- What is the meaning of this?

- Do you live here? - Do I live here?

This is my home, what are you doing here?

- Why we just delivered your piano.

- Piano, piano, I hate and detest pianos.

They are mechanical blunderbusses.

That that out of here before I commit murder.

Take it out, take it out, take it out of my -

No! That's enough! Stop!

Wait a minute!

I'll take care of you, I'll take care of you.

You want a lesson! I'll show you!

I'll teach you!

- Theodore, what are you doing?

- Why these two blundering idiots

delivered a piano here by mistake.

Look at our home. - Why it wasn't

a mistake darling, I bought the piano

to surprise you on your birthday!

- There, there dear, I wouldn't

have had this happen for a million dollars.

- I thought you said you hated pianos.

- What me hate pianos, why I'm nuts about them!

Excuse me gentlemen, what can I do

to show you how sorry I am.

- Just sign here, service with a smile.

Stanley, the pen.

Why you, out of the house! Out, out of the house!