Original subtitles

DON'T LOOK NOW, BUT WE GOT A BOGEY ON OUR TAIL.

IT'S JOE AGAIN.

WHAT DOES HE HOPE TO ACHIEVE BY TRACKING US?

I DON'T KNOW, BUT IT'S GOING TO STOP NOW.

WAIT HERE. I'LL HANDLE THIS.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

I THINK THAT'S PRETTY OBVIOUS. I'M FOLLOWING YOU.

BEING SUSPENDED FROM THE FORCE FOR BEING DELUSIONAL,

I GOT A LOT OF FREE TIME ON MY HANDS, SO GET USED TO ME,

BECAUSE I'M GOING TO BE HUGGING YOUR SHADOW

TILL I GET PROOF THAT MONGO IS REAL AND I'M NOT CRAZY.

FIRST OF ALL, YOU BROUGHT THIS ON YOURSELF.

I TOLD YOU NOT TO TELL ANYBODY.

SECOND, UH... NO!

AND THIRD, YOU, YOU CAN'T TELL ANYBODY. ASK ZARKOV. HE'LL TELL YOU.

HER METHOD IS INEFFECTIVE. I'M GOIN' IN.

HEY! THE SAVIOR OF THE UNIVERSE AND HIS ALIEN PAL NOW!

SAY CHEESE. PUT THE CAMERA DOWN.

AW, IT'S TOO BAD THERE'S NO RIFT IN THAT SHOT.

OH, WELL, NEXT TIME.

YOU GOT TO STOP FOLLOWING US. MAKE ME.

VERY WELL. WHAT ARE YOU-- WHOA! WHOA! HEY!

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? MAKING HIM STOP.

WAIT! WHOA! WHAT IS THAT?

SOME KIND OF MONGO RAYGUN? IT'S NOTHING. LET'S GO!

LOOK, JOE, I'M SORRY YOU LOST YOUR JOB, ALL RIGHT?

WE'LL DO ANYTHING WE CAN TO HELP YOU GET IT BACK,

BUT WE'RE NOT GOING TO TELL ANYBODY ABOUT MONGO,

AND WE'RE NOT GOING TO BE INTIMIDATED.

YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TIME!

HE'S GOING TO BE A PROBLEM.

[MAN CRYING OUT]

JUST BE PATIENT.

[SCREAMING]

JUST RELAX! WE'RE ALMOST THERE.

IS ALL THIS SCREAMING REALLY NECESSARY?

I AM SORRY, BENEVOLENT FATHER,

BUT HE MUST REMAIN CONSCIOUS WHILE THE DEVICE IS BEING IMPLANTED.

WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

THIS PROCEDURE WAS NOT AUTHORIZED BY ME.

IT WAS AUTHORIZED BY ME.

I'M TIRED OF WAITING, RANKOL.

WITH LENU, IT SEEMS I DON'T HAVE TO.

[CHIME SOUNDS]

AH.

THE PROCESS IS COMPLETE.

AND, AS YOU CAN SEE, THE SUBJECT IS STILL ALIVE.

HOW? I RE-SEQUENCED

THE NEURON TELEMETRY SEQUENCE

TO ELIMINATE RECEPTOR DISSONANCE.

SOMETHING I UNDERSTAND YOU'VE BEEN STRUGGLING WITH FOR SOME TIME, RANKOL.

HIS BRAIN WILL BE SCRAMBLED.

HOW ARE YOU FEELING?

[SHAKILY]: FINE.

VERY IMPRESSIVE, LENU.

WOULDN'T YOU SAY SO?

AH! HEY!

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? YOU CAN'T BE IN HERE!

OR WHAT? YOU'LL CALL THE POLICE?

BE MY GUEST.

NO! STOP IT!

W-W-W-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

[CRASHING]

WHERE IS IT?

WHERE IS WHAT?

THE RIFT BLASTER.

I KNOW YOU'VE GOT ONE AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE.

NO!

NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!

I CAN'T LET YOU IN THERE!

[DOORS OPENING]

NO!

YOU HAPPY NOW? OH!

THAT'S NOT...

WHAT YOU THINK IT IS.

WHEN YOU SEE DALE...

TELL HER I'VE GONE TO MONGO.

NO! NO, YOU CAN'T. YOU CAN'T.

THAT'S A VERY, VERY, VERY BAD IDEA.

DON'T WORRY, I WON'T BE GONE LONG.

JUST LONG ENOUGH TO GET PROOF THAT I'M NOT CRAZY.

PROOF? NO! YOU CAN'T!

LOOK, YOU CAN'T.

NOBODY CAN KNOW ABOUT THIS!

IF ANYBODY KNOWS ABOUT THIS,

IT'LL BE THE BEGINNING OF THE END.

WE'LL ALL DIE! DO YOU WANT TO DIE?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I'M SORRY ABOUT THIS,

BUT I CAN'T HAVE FLASH FOLLOWING ME.

[***]

OH, THAT IS FREAKY.

I WOULDN'T BELIEVE IT EITHER.

[***]

[WHISPERING]: THERE IS A TRAVELER IN THE GLEN.

[SHUTTER CLICKS]

[SIGHING WITH DISAPPOINTMENT]

IT IS ONLY A MAN.

[WHINING, MUFFLED]

[FLASH]: ZARKOV? MMPH!

[CONFUSED]: ZARKOV? MMPH!

ZARKOV? ZARKOV!

MMPH... BUDDY, ARE YOU OKAY?

[WHIMPERING]

IT WAS JOE, WASN'T IT?

MM-HMM! DID HE HIT YOU?

MM.

OKAY, BUDDY, THIS IS GOING TO HURT. A LOT.

ON THREE. READY? ONE...

[SCREAMING]: AH!

HE STOLE A RIFT BLASTER AND HE'S GONE TO MONGO.

THAT IS SO NOT GOOD.

I NEVER THOUGHT HE WOULD GO THIS FAR.

WE WERE CLEARLY NOT ASSERTIVE ENOUGH WITH HIM.

YOU SHOULD HAVE ALLOWED ME TO TERMINATE HIM PERMANENTLY.

NO, BAYLIN, I SHOULDN'T HAVE.

MAYBE IF YOU'D TRIED TO TALK TO HIM

RATHER THAN TRY TO SHOOT HIM,

WE COULD HAVE TALKED HIM OUT OF THIS.

OKAY, OKAY, TOMATO/TOMAHTO.

WHAT WE'VE GOT TO FOCUS ON IS JOE IS ON MONGO.

YES, WITH A RECALIBRATED RIFT BLASTER,

THAT, IF RANKOL GETS HIS HANDS ON,

HE'LL KNOW RIGHT AWAY

THAT WE'VE A WAY TO GO TO MONGO ON OUR OWN,

WHICH WE REALLY DON'T WANT HIM TO KNOW, SO...

GUESS WE'RE GOING TO MONGO.

HEY, IT'S ALL RIGHT, WE'RE HERE NOW.

IS THERE ANYBODY SCARY, OR BLUE,

OR SERIOUSLY DEAD IN FRONT OF US? NO. NO.

ARE YOU CERTAIN THIS IS THE SAME RIFT THAT JOE CAME THROUGH?

HE WAS HERE, MOVED ON QUICKLY.

TO WHERE?

[***]

OH! OH, HEY.

ORNAMENT? ORNAMENT FOR YOUR BONDMATE?

WHAT?

COME ON, TANDIS STONE BROOCH

FOR THE PRICE OF A STEEPPOT. NO, THANKS.

HEY. HEY--

WHAT'S IN THERE?

THE STEEPHOUSE.

HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY.

YOU'RE FROM BEYOND NASCENT CITY, AREN'T YOU?

SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

HONESTLY, I'M NOT IN THE MARKET FOR JEWELRY, OKAY?

[HITS FLOOR]

YEAH, WELL, I AM.

LET'S SEE WHAT WE'VE GOT HERE.

ALL RIGHT, VERY NICE.

OKAY.

AND...

WHAT-- OKAY!

[EXHALES]

SEE YA AROUND.

[SNIFFS, THEN SIGHS]

THESE BLOSSOMS ARE PUNGENT.

JOE'S SCENT IS VEILED.

WE SHOULD TRY LOOKING FOR FOOTPRINTS.

MAYBE WE SHOULD FAN OUT.

UH, IS THAT SUCH A GOOD IDEA?

BECAUSE I'D RATHER NOT FAN.

PERHAPS YOU SHOULD REMAIN CLOSE. THERE MAY BE HAZARDS.

I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.

[SIGHS WITH ANNOYANCE]

ZARKOV, COME WITH ME.

[ETHEREAL HARP MUSIC PLAYING NEARBY]

[***]

HELLO.

[CONTINUES PLAYING]

HEY.

DIDN'T EXPECT TO HEAR MUSIC OUT HERE. IT SOUNDS GREAT.

YOU DIDN'T HAPPEN TO SEE A GUY COME THROUGH HERE, HUH?

DARK HAIR, DRESSED KIND OF FOREIGN, LIKE ME?

I'M AFRAID I RARELY SEE ANYONE.

AH.

THEN WHO ARE YOU PLAYING FOR?

OH, I'M PLAYING FOR MY SISTER'S CHILDREN.

THE MUSIC SOOTHES THEM.

UH... WHERE ARE THEY?

THEY ARE SLEEPING NOW. AH.

WELL, THEN, I DON'T WANT TO WAKE THEM, SO...

NO, YOU DON'T.

RIGHT.

I'LL LEAVE YOU TO IT, THEN.

IT SOUNDS GREAT.

MIND THE BOG... [BOG SQUISHES]

WOULDN'T WANT TO STEP IN THAT.

THANKS.

BAYLIN? DALE?

[***]

A LADY!

[QUIETLY]: OH!

YOU WILL BE SO PLEASED, MISTRESS!

PARDON, MISS. [GASPS]

I DID NOT MEAN TO FRIGHTEN YOU.

MY APPEARANCE IS DISPLEASING.

NO, NO, IT'S OKAY.

I JUST WASN'T EXPECTING TO SEE ANYBODY.

MY MISTRESS NEEDS THIS VESSEL OPENED,

BUT MY FINGERS HAVE GROWN SO FEEBLE.

COULD YOU PAUSE TO AID ME?

OF COURSE.

AND MAYBE YOU CAN DO SOMETHING FOR ME, TOO.

I'M WONDERING IF YOU'VE SEEN A MAN PASS BY HERE RECENTLY?

I HAVE NOT SEEN ANYONE ON THIS PATH.

[***]

[GASPS]

[COUGHING]

[INHALES SHARPLY]

[EXHALES BRIEFLY]

[ANOTHER VOICE]: THE MOONS...

STILL THREE.

IN THE TIME THAT IT TOOK, RENDA, THEY COULD HAVE BUILT ANOTHER ONE.

IT WAS NOT EASY TO FIND WHERE SHE BURIED THE SPIRIT JAR.

AM I PRETTIER THAN MY SISTER?

OH, BY FAR, MISTRESS.

EXCELLENT. THEN WE CAN PROCEED.

I HOPE YOU'RE COMFORTABLE, PRETTY ONE,

BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING TO BE IN THERE A LONG, LONG TIME.

DO YOU HAVE THE ARTIFACTS?

I, UH, HAVE NOT YET OBTAINED THEM.

I'LL DO IT MYSELF. THESE LEGS FEEL STRONG, AND--

DALE?

OH!

IT SEEMS LIKE YOU ARE NOT TRAVELING ALONE.

A COMPANION LIKE THAT COULD BE USEFUL IN SO MANY WAYS.

TAKE THE VESSEL AND WAIT OUTSIDE THE VILLAGE FOR ME. GO!

DALE? OVER HERE!

HEY! WHERE'D YOU GO?

WE GOT SEPARATED, SO I GOT A LITTLE--

WHAT?

WORRIED. ME TOO.

ZARKOV! BAYLIN! WE'RE OVER HERE!

THEY DON'T NEED TO COME WITH US.

WHAT? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

NASCENT CITY. WHAT?

JOE'S TRAIL ALSO POINTS THERE.

IF HE IS LOOKING FOR PROOF, IT IS WHERE HE WILL GO.

WELL, LET'S HOPE THAT WE CAN GRAB HIM BEFORE HE GETS GRABBED.

EXCELLENT. YES.

LET'S GET TO THE GRABBING.

[***]

FLAMED LOIN OF HENJA...

I KILLED IT MYSELF,

AND IT NEARLY TOOK MY LEG OFF.

I WILL ENJOY IT ALL THE MORE, THEN.

THINGS HARD-WON ARE ALWAYS MORE DELICIOUS.

YOU LIKE TO WIN, DON'T YOU?

I LIKE TO ACHIEVE WHAT I SET OUT TO DO.

AND, LIKE YOU,

I DON'T LET ANYONE STAND IN MY WAY.

AND WHAT IS IT THAT YOU HAVE, UH...

SET OUT TO DO?

TO SERVE YOU, OF COURSE.

EXCELLENT.

THERE'RE SO FEW PEOPLE THAT I FEEL I CAN REALLY TRUST.

SOMETIMES EVEN THOSE WE WORK CLOSEST WITH

SEEM TO HAVE THEIR OWN AGENDAS.

I UNDERSTAND.

I KNEW THAT YOU WOULD.

PLEASE... BEFORE IT GETS COLD.

[CUTLERY CLINKING]

I WANT YOU TO THINK OF ME AS YOUR FRIEND.

YOUR CONFIDANT.

YOU COME TO ME ANYTIME.

A NEW DAY IS DAWNING FOR MONGO AND ITS PEOPLE.

[SETS PLATE DOWN]

THOSE WHO SUPPORT ME WILL FLOURISH AS I FLOURISH.

THOSE WHO OPPOSE ME...

I THINK WE UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER.

YES.

I THINK WE DO.

IF YOU CAN'T PAY FOR IT,

YOU KNOW YOU CAN WORK FOR IT.

SORRY, MISS, BUT I NEED TO TALK TO YOUR DATE.

LEAVE THAT.

[MERCHANT GROANS]

I CHANGED MY MIND. YOU DO HAVE SOMETHING THAT I WANT.

GET 'EM OUTTA HERE! COME ON!

HA! THAT'S RIGHT, BUDDY!

NOBODY MESSES WITH JOE.

OH!

LET GO OF ME!

HEY, HEY, HEY!

THAT'S OFFICIAL POLICE BUSINESS!

LET GO OF THAT!

OH! UGH!

WE SMELL LIKE-- YES, I KNOW,

BUT SNEAKING THROUGH THE SEWER TUNNEL

IS STILL A LOT EASIER THAN TRYING TO

BLUFF OUR WAY PAST THE TRIB SCANNERS.

OH, GOD!

I WILL NOT STAY IN THESE REPULSIVE CLOTHES ANOTHER MOMENT.

DALE?

OH, YEAH, YEAH.

DON'T YOU HAVE SOMEWHERE TO GO?

THE STEEPHOUSE.

I HAVE CONTACTS WHO WILL KNOW

IF A MAN FROM EARTH HAS BEEN SEEN IN THE CITY.

YOU AND ZARKOV SHOULD GO.

FLASH WILL STAY WITH ME.

WHOA, HEY, WAIT. WHY AREN'T WE ALL GOING TO THE STEEPHOUSE?

BECAUSE I HAVE THINGS TO DO HERE.

COME WITH ME.

ANYBODY ELSE NOTICE THAT DALE'S NOT QUITE ACTING LIKE HERSELF TODAY?

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND WOMEN.

WHAT? NOTHING.

WHY DON'T YOU TAKE ZARKOV OVER TO THE STEEPHOUSE?

I'LL GO FIND OUT WHAT'S WRONG WITH DALE AND MEET YOU GUYS THERE.

I HOPE THESE PANTS STAY UP.

WE SHARE THAT HOPE TOGETHER.

HEY! HEY. YOU KNOW WHAT?

YOU'RE NOT TAKING ANOTHER STEP UNTIL

YOU TELL ME EXACTLY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.

AND WHAT MAKES YOU THINK SOMETHING'S WRONG WITH ME?

YOU KNOW, YOU'RE ACTING VERY UN-DALE-LIKE, ALL RIGHT?

IT'S BEEN SO LONG SINCE I'VE BEEN THIS CLOSE TO A MAN,

AND I HAVE MISSED IT.

OKAY, THAT IS SOMETHING BETWEEN YOU AND JOE,

AND NOT SOMETHING I'M REALLY COMFORTABLE TALKING ABOUT.

I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT JOE.

CAN'T WE TALK ABOUT US?

[FLASH CLEARS HIS THROAT]

THERE IS NO US, ALL RIGHT?

[CHUCKLES]

I THINK WE BOTH KNOW THAT THAT'S NOT TRUE.

YOU THINK ABOUT ME

ALL THE TIME, DON'T YOU?

NOW AND THEN, BUT, I MEAN, THAT'S ONLY REASONABLE, CONSIDERING--

CONSIDERING HOW MUCH YOU WANT ME.

ARE YOU OKAY?

I MEAN, YOU'RE ACTING VERY FRIENDLY.

IS EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT IN THERE?

I WANT YOU.

LOOK, I REALLY... MISS YOU, BUT...

AND I THINK ABOUT YOU A LOT MORE THAN I SHOULD, BUT THIS IS NOT RIGHT.

WE CAN'T DO THIS, NOT HERE, NOT NOW,

AND NOT WHILE WE'RE OUT LOOKING FOR JOE, OKAY? THIS ISN'T RIGHT.

WOULD EVERYBODY STOP TALKING ABOUT JOE?

[HOOKAH WATER BUBBLING]

[***]

IT IS NOT GOOD FOR ME TO BE SEEN WITH YOU.

WHY? BECAUSE I'M A KNOWN ENEMY OF MING?

YES.

DO NOT DRINK ANYTHING.

DO NOT EAT ANYTHING. DO NOT SPEAK TO ANYONE.

OKAY.

[BLADE SINGING]

WAIT, THIS IS YOUR IMPORTANT TASK?

SHOPPING? HERE?

A DAGGER WITH A KLITHMITE BLADE AND THREE RED CHRONDIANS IN THE HILT.

[HYDRAULICS WHIR]

OKAY, FIRST OF ALL, HOW DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS?

SECONDLY, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH THAT?

SERIOUS MAGIC, USUALLY.

UH, OKAY, THIS IS SO NOT HAPPENING.

FIRST OF ALL, SHE'S HAVING A SERIOUSLY WEIRD DAY.

SECONDLY, WE'RE NOT GOING TO ADD DAGGERS INTO THE MIX.

YOU KNOW? JUST GIVE IT TO ME, OKAY?

OW!

[GROANING]

THE BLOOD OF AN INNOCENT.

NOW I AM TRULY ALIVE.

OKAY, YOU'RE SO NOT DALE.

OKAY, WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH DALE?

MY NAME IS HELIA,

AND BECAUSE I DO NOT HAVE A BODY OF MY OWN, I BORROWED YOUR FRIEND'S.

WELL, THEN, WHERE IS SHE? IS SHE IN THERE? DALE?

DALE, ARE YOU IN THERE? HUH?

SHE IS SAFE. YOU NEED NOT WORRY.

SAFE? SAFE HOW? SAFE WHERE?

MY SERVANT IS TENDING TO HER.

I WILL RETURN THIS BODY ONCE I HAVE FREED MY CHILDREN.

YOUR CHILDREN, HUH?

FUNNY, I DIDN'T PEG YOU AS THE MATERNAL TYPE.

MY FAMILY IS EVERYTHING TO ME,

AND I WILL DO WHATEVER I MUST TO SAVE THEM.

AND I WILL DO WHATEVER I MUST TO SAVE DALE.

THEN HELP ME AND I WILL MAKE SURE SHE'S RETURNED TO THIS BODY SAFELY.

OKAY, FINE, YOUR CHILDREN, WHAT HAPPENED TO THEM?

THEY WERE TAKEN FROM ME BY A VILE SORCERESS, THE MOST EVIL ON ALL OF MONGO.

AND THIS DAGGER FITS INTO THIS HOW?

IT WILL DRIVE HER FROM THE BODY SHE STOLE FROM ME,

AND ALLOW ME TO TAKE BACK WHAT IS MINE.

AND WHEN YOU DEFEAT THIS SORCERESS,

YOU'LL GET YOUR BODY BACK, RIGHT?

YES, I WILL NO LONGER NEED DALE.

NOW, ARE YOU GOING TO HELP ME, OR DO I NEED TO DISPATCH YOU, TOO?

NO, YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE WITHOUT ME, SWEETHEART.

I'M GOING TO HELP YOU, AND WHEN I DO, I GET DALE BACK.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND? VERY AGGRESSIVE.

I LIKE THAT.

THIS DALE MUST BE VERY SPECIAL TO YOU.

YEAH. SHE IS.

I WOULD KILL FOR HER.

I DOUBT THAT.

NOW, OFF TO THE CHAMBER OF ARCHIVES.

OH, NOW, HEY, HEY, WAIT.

YOU CAN'T JUST WALK INTO THE CITADEL LOOKING LIKE THAT.

I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT. I'M BEAUTIFUL.

NO, YOU DON'T GET IT.

DALE'S NOT EXACTLY WELCOME IN NASCENT CITY.

IF MING SEES HER--

YOU... YOU'LL BE ARRESTED IMMEDIATELY.

WELL, THEN YOU WILL HAVE TO MAKE SURE THAT THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN.

UH... WHAT IS THAT?

IT'S A GESTURE OF FRIENDSHIP FROM YOUR FRIEND OVER THERE.

OH, I SEE, I'M...

IT WOULD BE RUDE NOT TO DRINK IT.

[STAMMERING AWKWARDLY]

THAT'S...

[***]

[EXHALING DEEPLY]: OH, MY...

[HIGH-PITCHED]: WHAT IS THAT?

A GUARANTEED GOOD TIME.

[LAUGHING SILENTLY] OH...

[EXHALING DEEPLY]

OH!

[***]

THE GUY YOU'RE LOOKING FOR,

WHAT PRICE DOES HE HAVE ON HIS HEAD?

HE'S A FRIEND, NOT PREY.

OH, WELL, YOU NEED BETTER FRIENDS.

BUT YOU DO NOT NEED THAT HAND,

OR YOU WOULD NOT BE SO CARELESS WITH IT.

TO THINK I WAS GOING TO OFFER TO HELP YOU.

YOU'RE SO TOUGH?

YOU GET HIM OUT OF THE CITADEL YOURSELF.

AND YOU ARE CERTAIN HE IS IN THERE?

UNLESS THE PATRIOT GUARDS HAVE SOMEPLACE ELSE

FOR THEIR PRISONERS.

[ALL CHUCKLING]

WHICH OF YOU HAS WEAPONS FOR SALE?

[CHUCKLING STOPS]

AND WHO WAS IT THAT HAD THIS?

THEY'RE BRINGING HIM IN NOW.

HIS NAME IS JOE.

AH.

A NEW VISITOR FROM EARTH.

AN UNEXPECTED SURPRISE.

WELCOME TO MONGO.

I AM MING, YOUR HOST.

JOE WYLEE, YOUR PRISONER.

YOU TREAT ALL YOUR VISITORS THIS WELL?

A NECESSARY PRECAUTION.

IT SEEMS THERE ARE SOME FROM YOUR WORLD

WHO WISH ME HARM. NOT ME.

I'M NOT HERE TO MAKE TROUBLE. JUST PASSING THROUGH.

COMING HERE IS NOT EASY.

WHO HELPED YOU?

NOBODY. I CAME ON MY OWN.

NOTHING TO DO WITH ANYONE ELSE.

NOT EVEN FLASH GORDON?

ESPECIALLY HIM.

SO YOU KNOW HIM?

THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM.

I THINK WE'RE IN LUCK.

YOU HAVE FOUND THE PERFECT CANDIDATE.

LOOK, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING,

BUT I'M NOT FLASH GORDON'S FRIEND!

[LAUGHING WILDLY]

[CACKLING]

ZARKOV! ZARKOV!

HA! OH! HEY! BAYLIN!

[SNIFFS]

VALICIUM TEA?

THIS PLAYS TERRIBLE TRICKS ON THE MIND. HOW MANY HAVE YOU HAD?

HOW MANY? I THINK I...

[WHEEZES AND CACKLES]

I CAN'T COUNT MY FINGERS!

OH! I DIDN'T WANT TO BE--

SORRY, WHAT DID YOU SAY YOUR NAME WAS?

I DIDN'T SAY.

IDIDNSAY!

THIS IS BAYLIN.

BAYLIN, MEET IDIDNSAY.

[LAUGHING DRUNKENLY]

YOU HAVE A TOOTHBRUSH? WE ARE LEAVING.

HEY. HEY! CALL ME!

[***]

SO THIS SERVANT WHO HAS DALE?

SHE WAITS FOR ME TO RETURN.

WHEN I HAVE WHAT I NEED FROM THE CHAMBER OF ARCHIVES,

WE WILL GO TO HER.

OKAY, NOW WHAT?

SORRY I ASKED.

AT LAST... I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE.

OKAY, REVENGE?

I THOUGHT YOU SAID THIS WAS ABOUT SAVING YOUR CHILDREN.

AND TO DO SO, I MUST DEFEAT MY SISTER.

WAIT A MINUTE, YOUR SISTER

IS THE MOST EVIL SORCERESS ON MONGO?

SHE IS A HIDEOUS BEAST

AND DESERVES HER PUNISHMENT.

AND...

HOW ARE YOU GOING TO PUNISH HER WITH THAT?

IT IS A SPIRIT JAR.

I WILL DRAW IN HER SOUL AND IMPRISON HER

JUST AS SHE IMPRISONED ME.

AND SHE AND HER MUSIC WILL FINALLY BE SILENCED.

I'M SORRY, DID, UM... DID YOU SAY MUSIC?

DOES SHE PLAY THE HARP-THING, OR WHATEVER YOU CALL IT? THE STRUMMY THING?

YES. INCESSANTLY.

BUT NOT FOR LONG.

[INHALES SHARPLY]

YOU KNOW, ACTUALLY, I MET HER...

AND SHE DIDN'T SEEM ALL THAT TERRIBLE...

ACTUALLY, SHE SEEMED KIND OF NICE.

YOU, TOO?

I'M SO SICK OF EVERYONE LIKING HER MORE THAN ME!

BUT IT WON'T BE A PROBLEM MUCH LONGER,

BECAUSE SOON, THERE WILL BE ONLY ONE.

BUT WHAT ABOUT DALE?

DON'T WORRY.

I'LL TAKE GOOD CARE OF HER.

HEY, KNOW WHAT I NEVER NOTICED BEFORE?

HOW NICE YOU SMELL. LIKE FRESHLY-CUT GRASS, AND LEMON PLEDGE.

SMELL ME AGAIN, LITTLE MAN, AND I WILL BREAK YOU.

OH, HEY, THERE'S DALE.

I WONDER WHAT SHE SMELLS LIKE.

[GASPS]

OH! WHAT WAS THAT? WAS THAT A FIREBALL?

INTERESTING.

I HAVE NOT KNOWN HER TO HAVE BALLS BEFORE.

HEY!

HEY, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? [DRUNKENLY]: HEY!

[CACKLING GOOFILY] WHAT'S UP WITH DALE?

SHE GOT BODYJACKED BY A SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED SORCERESS.

OH, I HATE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS.

DID SHE DO THIS TO HIM?

SADLY, NO. HE DRANK A SENSORY-AMPLIFYING TEA

AND HAS BECOME MORE ANNOYING THAN USUAL.

OH, GREAT, SO DALE'S POSSESSED,

ZARKOV'S HIGH, AND JOE'S AWOL.

JOE IS NOT MISSING. HE HAS BEEN ARRESTED.

WHAT? MING HAS JOE? IT IS NOT ENCOURAGING.

OH, THESE CLOTHES ARE STRANGLING ME!

OH, HEY, NO, NO, NO, BUDDY, NOT A GOOD IDEA, OKAY?

HEY. UM... HEY!

[WHISTLES] ...LOOK AT THAT.

WANT TO PLAY WITH THESE? HERE YOU GO.

[KEYS CLATTER]

ALL RIGHT, WHAT DOES THIS SAY?

IT SPEAKS OF TWO SISTERS

LOCKED IN AN ETERNAL STRUGGLE.

ONE WAS GRANTED DARK MAGIC AND THE OTHER, LIGHT.

BOTH ARE VERY POWERFUL,

BUT ONLY ONE CAN REIGN AT A TIME.

IN ORDER TO SEIZE POWER,

ONE MUST KILL THE OTHER AND TRAP HER SPIRIT IN A JAR.

SO THAT'S WHY MING HAS THE JAR LOCKED UP.

THE BAD ONE MUST'VE BEEN GETTING TOO POWERFUL.

AND NOW THAT SHE'S GOT THE JAR, SHE'S PROBABLY TRYING TO KILL HER SISTER.

AND HER SISTER WILL TRY TO KILL HER.

SO IF THE GOOD ONE WINS, DALE DIES.

AND IF THE BAD SISTER WINS,

SHE KEEPS DALE'S BODY.

DALE IS SCREWED. HOO!

OKAY, YOU GO SAVE JOE, THEN TRY AND FIND US.

WE'LL BE IN THE BOG WITH THE LADY PLAYING THE HARP.

LOOK FOR FIREBALLS, AND GOOD LUCK.

KEEP YOUR LUCK.

YOU WILL NEED IT.

FIREBALLS!

[ELECTRICITY CRACKLES]

[JOE GROANS]

YOU'LL TELL ME EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY...

BUT IF YOU ENJOY THE STRUGGLE,

I WON'T DEPRIVE YOU.

GO TO HELL.

SHOW ME THE WAY.

[DAGGER CLATTERS]

MING HAS A NEW PLAYMATE.

AND WE DIDN'T INVITE YOU!

[LENU'S WEAPON CLATTERS]

[ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]

ARE YOU INJURED?

I'M FINE.

WE MUST GO BACK.

YOUR FRIENDS ARE VERY WORRIED ABOUT YOU.

YOU'RE BACK, MISTRESS. I'M SO HAPPY.

DID YOU GET THE DAGGER AND THE VESSEL?

OF COURSE.

VICTORY IS JUST MOMENTS AWAY.

AND WHERE'S THE HANDSOME ONE?

HE WASN'T AS EASILY SWAYED AS I HAD HOPED.

STRANGELY, HE WAS MORE INTERESTED

IN HIS FRIEND'S SPIRIT THAN HER BODY. HUH.

SOON, THE TRANSFORMATION WILL BE COMPLETE,

AND THIS BODY WILL BE MINE FOREVER.

MAY I TAKE YOUR SISTER'S, THEN?

I'D HATE TO SEE IT GO TO WASTE.

DON'T GET AHEAD OF YOURSELF, RENDA.

I NEED TO KILL HER FIRST.

WELL, WELL...

ISN'T THIS A LITTLE EMBARRASSING?

OH, AND IT WOULD SEEM THAT YOUR PRISONER HAS ESCAPED.

GET ME OUT OF HERE.

OH, NO.

I THINK THAT YOU'VE ESTABLISHED

THAT YOU LIKE TO WORK ALONE.

I WOULDN'T DREAM OF INTERFERING. BUT DON'T WORRY.

I'M SURE OUR BENEVOLENT LEADER

WON'T HOLD THIS FAILURE AGAINST YOU...

MUCH.

[***]

GREETINGS, TRAVELER.

YOUR MUSIC IS LOVELY.

THANK YOU.

WHO KNEW MY SISTER WAS SO TALENTED?

[STOPS PLAYING] HELIA?

HOW?

I HAVE COME TO TAKE WHAT'S MINE.

YOUR MAGIC IS WEAK, SISTER.

AND YOUR MAGIC IS USELESS.

MY MUSIC WILL PROTECT ME FROM YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN.

FORTUNATELY, I DON'T NEED MAGIC TO KILL YOU.

MY BODY IS SO LIGHT!

I FEEL LIKE I COULD FLY, BUT MY BODY'S SO HEAVY.

FOCUS, ALL RIGHT? SEE GRANDMA OVER THERE?

ALL RIGHT, THAT MUST BE THE SERVANT GIRL

SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT, WHICH MEANS SHE'S GOT

DALE'S SOUL IN SOME SORT OF

SOUL-SUCKING JAR.

DALE'S IN A JAR?

YEAH. DOESN'T MAKE SENSE.

GO GET IT. WHAT IF SHE FIREBALLS ME AGAIN?

DUCK.

WHERE'S DALE?

I KNOW YOU HAVE HER.

GET AWAY FROM ME, YOU BEAST.

[SMACK]

HEY, HEY, HEY. LADIES.

LADIES, HEY, WHAT'S WITH ALL THE COMMOTION?

TRYING TO KILL EACH OTHER, AND YOU'RE NOT HELPING.

OW!

OH!

DON'T YOU THINK YOU'D BE A LOT MORE PRODUCTIVE

WITH MAYBE A GOOD HEART-TO-HEART AND SOME COUNSELING?

[LAUGHS]: I'VE GOT HER!

I THINK NOT!

[CACKLING EVILLY]

[IN SLOW MOTION]: NO!

FLASH!

THAT'S DALE!

[***]

[BOG SLURPING]

[SQUISHING]

[BUBBLING AND BURBLING]

AH!

[BEGINS PLAYING INSTRUMENT]

[GOOD SISTER]: SLEEP, CHILDREN!

THEY'RE AWAKENING!

[GASPS]

[GASPING]

RISE, CHILDREN!

RISE!

[GROWLING]

NO!

NO!

NO!

THESE ARE HER CHILDREN?

[GASPING AND STRAINING]

THE HARP!

PLAY THE MUSIC, IT WILL KEEP HER MAGIC AT BAY.

[GRUNTING]

ZARKOV!

PLAY THE HARP!

ZARKOV!

FLASH!

[BUBBLING]

THE HARP!

[GRUNTING]

[HELIA LAUGHS MANIACALLY]

[HELIA LAUGHS]

[CHORDS SING ETHEREALLY]

[PAINED GROWLING] MY CHILDREN!

NO!

[CHORDS CONTINUE SINGING]

[GROWLING GROWS CALMER]

[BOG BUBBLING AS GROWLS SUBSIDE]

[ETHEREAL HARP CONTINUES TO PLAY]

[GASPING]

HOW DO I GET DALE BACK INTO DALE?

[GASPING]

A DAGGER TO HER HEART WILL DRIVE OUT MY SISTER

AND ALLOW YOUR FRIEND TO RECLAIM HER BODY.

NO, NO, THERE'S GOT TO BE ANOTHER WAY.

THERE IS NONE.

YOU CAN'T DO IT, CAN YOU?

[CHUCKLES DERISIVELY]

[FLASH GROANING]

[HELIA GASPS]

[SCREAMING]

[EXTRACTS DAGGER]

NO!

[GASPING FOR BREATH]

[DROPS DAGGER]

DALE!

DALE?

DALE!

OH, DALE! COME ON!

THE SPIRIT JAR!

YEAH!

NO, NO, NO. NO!

COME ON!

* SPEND ALL YOUR TIME WAITING FOR THAT SECOND CHANCE *

COME ON!

[COUGHING]

* FOR THE BREAK THAT WILL MAKE IT OKAY *

HELIA WILL REIGN IN TERROR NO MORE.

* THERE'S ALWAYS SOME REASON

* TO FEEL NOT GOOD ENOUGH

* AND IT'S HARD AT THE END OF THE DAY *

* I NEED SOME DISTRACTION

* OH

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

SHH. NOT ALL SORCERESSES ARE EVIL.

* MEMORIES SEEP FROM MY VEINS

COME ON.

* THEY MAY BE EMPTY AND WEIGHTLESS *

COME ON.

* AND MAYBE I'LL FIND SOME PEACE TONIGHT *

* IN THE ARMS OF...

DALE'S SPIRIT JAR!

* THE ANGEL

* FLY AWAY FROM HERE

COME ON, DALE.

* FROM THIS DARK

[COUGHING]

* COLD HOTEL ROOM

COME ON, DALE.

* AND THE ENDLESSNESS THAT YOU FEAR *

* YOU ARE PULLED FROM THE WRECKAGE *

[GASPING]

* OF YOUR SILENT REVERIE

THERE YOU GO! FLASH?

WHERE AM I?

* IN THE ARMS OF THE ANGEL *

* MAY YOU FIND...

AND WHY ARE YOU COVERED IN MUD?

* SOME COMFORT HERE

WHAT'S THAT TERRIBLE SMELL?

[LAUGHING]

* IN THE ARMS OF THE ANGEL

OH.

* MAY YOU FIND SOME COMFORT HERE **

A TOAST.

TO A SUCCESSFUL TRIAL RUN.

YOU'RE NOT ANGRY THAT HE GOT AWAY?

SUPPOSE I WERE ANGRY WITH YOU.

WHAT WOULD THAT CHANGE?

MM?

WOULD YOU REFUSE MY HOSPITALITY?

WOULD YOU PREFER NOT TO DRINK WHAT I OFFER?

DO YOU IMAGINE

THERE IS A PLACE ON THIS PLANET

YOU COULD HIDE FROM MY DISPLEASURE?

I WOULD NOT HIDE FROM YOU.

I WOULD ACCEPT WHATEVER PUNISHMENT I DESERVED.

THEN ENJOY YOUR DRINK.

NO PUNISHMENT TODAY.

[EXHALES]

EVERYTHING HAS GONE EXACTLY AS I HOPED.

YOU KNEW THAT HIS FRIENDS WOULD COME?

IT'S NOT COMPLETELY UNEXPECTED,

BUT, REALLY, IT SERVES OUR ENDS.

THEY BELIEVE THEY SNATCHED HIM FROM MY CLUTCHES

JUST IN TIME...

WHEN, IN FACT...

THEY WERE JUST TOO LATE.

JOE! BAYLIN!

OVER HERE!

JOE!

ARE YOU OKAY?

I AM.

THANKS TO BAYLIN.

SHE CAN REALLY KICK ASS.

WE KNOW.

THAT'S WHY WE LOVE HER.

ARE YOU STILL POSSESSED?

[FLASH CHUCKLING]

I CAN BE KICK-ASS AND HUMOROUS.

YOU ARE SOILED.

[LAUGHS]

I'M GLAD YOU'RE ALL RIGHT.

YOU WERE RIGHT...

ALL OF YOU.

THIS PLACE IS TOO DANGEROUS. WE'VE GOT TO KEEP IT A SECRET.

[SCOFFS]: IT'S ABOUT TIME YOU FIGURED THAT OUT.

I'M SORRY I SLUGGED YOU...

AND FOR ALL THE TROUBLE.

IT'S JUST GOOD TO BE ON THE SAME SIDE.

THANK GOD EVERYBODY'S BACK TO NORMAL, HUH?

LET'S GET OUTTA HERE.

[***]

[TRILLING AND BEEPING]

[RIFT RIPPLING]