Original subtitles

[roaring]

["Spinout"

[by Elvis Presley]

♪ To Spinout yeah ♪

♪ Spinout ♪

♪ When her motor's warm ♪

♪ Yeah-yeah-yeah ♪

♪ And she's purring sweet ♪

♪ Oh yes ♪

♪ Buddy let me warn ya ♪

♪ You're on a one-way street ♪

♪ Yeah-yeah ♪

♪ She will crowd ya close

spin your wheels ♪

♪ Then you're gonna

know how it feels ♪

♪ To spinout yeah ♪

♪ Spinout ♪♪

[instrumental music]

[engine revving]

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

[tires screeching]

[tires screeching]

Mike McCoy!

Oh!

[water splashing]

Hey.

You're all wet.

I saw you last night at the

Crazy Club. You sing great.

- You know, you could - Have got me killed.

You sure killed me.

Oh, and what you do with a song.

- Do you know - It was all I could do

- to keep from jumping up - On the stage..

Oh, knock it off, will you?

- You just demolished me - And you're standing there

yapping as if nothing happened.

- You're cute.

- No, you're cute.

The way you sing, the way you

drive, the way you get mad.

Mike, I really go for you.

Honey, I'm just about

to go for you.

Ooh, I can hardly wait.

- If you're not out of here - About three seconds, I'm gonna

- put you over my knee, - I'm gonna paddle your bottom

- until it's as red as - That jalopy you're driving.

Oh, but I'm only wearing...

- That's good, because - You're gonna feel it, too.

[laughing]

So long, Mike, for now.

"So long, Mike, for now."

[engine revving]

[instrumental music]

[drum roll]

["Stop, Look and Listen"

[by Elvis Presley]

♪ When I was a

little bitty boy ♪

♪ Sitting on my papa's knee ♪

♪ I still remember ♪

♪ Every word my papa

said to me ♪

♪ Now boy if you ever meet ♪

- ♪ A pretty woman - Walking down the street ♪

- ♪ You'd better stop real still - Look both ways ♪

♪ Listen or you'll

get in trouble ♪

♪ When you see her go

strutting by ♪

♪ Giving you that evil eye ♪

♪ And she's got a

kind of dreamy look ♪

♪ Just enough to get you shook ♪

♪ Now boy don't you

lose your head ♪

- ♪ You pay attention - What your papa said ♪

♪ You'd better stop real still

look both ways ♪

♪ Listen or you'll

get in trouble ♪

[cheering]

♪ She'll drive you crazy

with the way she walks ♪

♪ She'll drive you crazy

with the way she talks ♪

♪ And you'll think you're

gonna lose your mind ♪

♪ 'Cause that pretty

woman looks so fine ♪

- ♪ And the very first thing - You'll know ♪

- ♪ You'll be telling her - You love her so ♪

♪ You'd better stop ♪♪

[cheering and applause]

["Adam and Evil"

[by Elvis Presley]

♪ Now Adam and Evil

they go hand in hand ♪

♪ Eve taught him sin

that's the way it all began ♪

♪ But every time you kiss me ♪

♪ My heart pounds like a drum ♪

♪ So if trouble is a woman ♪

♪ Trouble here I come ♪

♪ I'm lonely like Adam

you're evil like Eve ♪

♪ I shouldn't take forbidden

fruit 'cause I believe ♪

- ♪ I'll be heading - Straight for heartache ♪

♪ I should cut loose and run ♪

♪ But if loving you

means heartache ♪

♪ Heartache here I come ♪

♪ Here I come ♪

♪ You're not the angel

that I dreamed about ♪

♪ But you're the devil I don't

want to live without ♪

♪ A woman's a woman

a man is a man ♪

♪ I can't be free

I'm just putty in your hands ♪

♪ Who cares about tomorrow

I need your love tonight ♪

♪ And even if you're evil ♪

♪ Baby hold me tight ♪

♪ You're not the angel

that I dreamed about ♪

♪ But you're the devil I don't

want to live without ♪

♪ A woman's a woman

a man is a man ♪

♪ I can't be free

I'm just putty in your hands ♪

♪ Who cares about tomorrow

I need your love tonight ♪

♪ And baby even if you're evil ♪

♪ Baby hold me tight ♪

♪ Hold me tight ♪

♪ Hold me tight ♪

♪ Hold me tight ♪

[cheering and applause]

Thank you. Thank you.

Um, well,

this is our last night.

- It's really been great - Here in Santa Barbara.

- In fact, uh, I don't know when - We've had such a good time..

Singing, that is.

- Anyway, we'd like to thank you - For your hospitality

and we hope you'll ask us back.

Goodbye.

[cheering and applause]

Hey, they're a great audience.

We were pretty good, too.

You were wonderful, Mike.

Would you pack my things, buddy?

- I'd like to check out the cove - Before we take off. Okay?

- Sure, Mike. - Thanks, pal.

- My pleasure. - We'll see you in the car.

Don't be too long.

Mike!

Well, I'll be seeing you, baby.

- Yeah, sure. - So long.

Excuse me, baby. Uh, sir.

- So long, anyway. - Uh, Mr. McCoy?

- Yeah. - I'm Howard Foxhugh.

- Of Foxhugh Motors? - That's right.

You put out great line of cars.

- That Foxhugh Whiplash of yours, - That was a good car.

- Thank you. - I raced against it once.

- I know. I saw you in that race. - You were pretty good.

- Thank you. - Well, I'll be seeing you.

Model J Duesenberg, '29, right?

Yup.

When I was a kid this was one of

the most powerful cars around.

It still is.

- [both] - They sure don't make them - Like that anymore.

Hey! A Cobra 427.

That what you race in?

I did until this morning.

- Some squirrel - Ran me off the road.

Mr. McCoy, my secretary tells me

you turned down my offer.

- Your offer? - $2,500.

That's a lot of money

just to sing one song.

- So you're the kook.

- I'm the kook.

- My daughter's birthday - Is on the 15th.

I want you to give a private

performance just for her.

I thought it was a gag.

- You mean you'd pay all that - Money just for one song

for one little girl?

After all, it's her birthday.

- Why don't you get her - A teddy bear?

She wants you.

- Well, that's very nice, but... - I'll make it $3,000.

(all)

$3,000?

We'll take it!

- 3,000 divided by four, - That makes...

No, four goes into $3,000...

- $750 each.

- Wow!

Is that dollars?

- I'll expect you at my home - On the evening in the 15th.

- We'll give you the best - Performance

of our lives, mister.

- Boy, is your kid lucky - To have a daddy like you.

- Congratulations, sir. You just - Bought yourself a great group.

I'm sure I have.

- He hasn't bought himself - One thing.

- I'm sorry, mister. - We can't make it.

- 'Why can't you make it?' - Yeah, why can't we make it?

Yeah, why can't we make it?

Because Mike says so,

that's why.

- We're supposed to be in - Los Angeles on the 15th.

- I can take care of that. - Don't take care of anything.

- They're expecting me - On LA on 15th, unless

- I break a leg, - I'm gonna be there.

- Well, you're a man of your word, - I like that

but I am a man of my word, too.

And I promised Cynthia

you'd sing for her

and you will.

- Who knows? - You may even enjoy it.

Well, there's nothing I enjoy

more than singing for a girl.

But it's gotta be

one that I pick..

not somebody who's paying me.

- I'm sorry, Mr. Foxhugh, - We can't make it.

- I'll make it $5,000.

- Five..

- We'll see, - Four goes into $5,000...

- You divide the quotient - From the logarithm

- and then you - Subtract the factor.

Look, here's my schedule

for the next six weeks.

- If your girl wants - To hear me sing, she can

- hear me at any - One of these places.

- Of course, there will be - A few people around.

- Tell you what. - Have you got a pen?

Yeah.

It won't cost her nothing.

It'll be a free pass.

Let's load up.

[dramatic music]

- You're in the way.

- Oh, sorry about that, Curly.

You better move.

[music continues]

[engine starts]

McCoy!

You'll be there.

- You know what happens - If we do that song

for Foxhugh's little daughter?

Somebody's bound to

hear about it. Publicity.

- 'First thing you know we'll be - On the Ed Sullivan Show.'

- Our records will - Be in the top 40.

And then we'll become stars.

- Stars!

- Stars!

Stars have responsibilities.

They have to keep appointments

sign papers,

live in a house, stay put.

Yeah.

Ugh!

- And you know - What else happens?

- We make millions.

- Yeah.

Money. Oh, let's be stars.

- No. We get married.

- 'Married?'

- Married? - Yep, you got to get married.

- 'You want that?' - You must be kidding.

- You must be kidding.

- You want that? Not me.

- I'd rather stay single, - Do the things

I like to do, race, singing.

Of course, you guys may

have different opinions.

- Oh, no. I don't - Feel any different.

- Yeah, who feels different? - Yeah, who feels different?

- Yeah, who?

- Well, then that settles it.

- We don't want his $5,000.

- We don't.

We don't.

- I don't know about you guys, - But I'm hungry.

Midnight supper.

We'll have bisque Daumont,

fillet of beef

with sauce bordelaise, salade

grecque, and chocolate mousse.

- Chocolate moose?

- Pudding, dingbat.

Moose pudding?

Without the antlers.

[instrumental music]

[music continues]

Hm.

[slow music]

[mellow music]

- [gasp] - Oh!

Some kind of prehistoric animal!

No, it's a hound dog.

Here you go, fella.

How about that? There were

eight eggs in that recipe.

- Maybe he doesn't - Like moose pudding.

- I think it was great, buddy. - The whole meal was great.

- Thanks, Mike. - It was terrific.

No kidding. I never knew a guy

who could cook the way you do.

I'm not a guy. I'm a girl.

Girl. I gotta remember that.

- (Curly) - 'Yeah, why don't you remember - That, for Pete's sake?'

(Les)

no mental genius yourself.'

'Wait a minute, you're

- 'Yeah, you forget, too.'

- 'Well, nobody's perfect.'

- 'Well, he's right, fella.' - 'Not fella!'

- 'Oh. Son of a gun!' - I'll get some wood for fire.

Okay. We'll clean up.

Dishes, you guys.

Oh-oh, and take your time.

I'm gonna wait by

the fire for Mike.

- She's gonna wait by - The fire for Mike.

- Uh, you wash and I'll dry. - Okay.

Or else you could wash and dry.

Oh, thanks.

[instrumental music]

- Hi. - Hi.

- You been looking for me? - Matter of fact, I was.

- Are you from the FBI?

- No.

- The CIA?

- No.

The PTA?

Parent-Teachers Association?

- No. - The Peeping Toms Association.

- Look, you've been following me - For weeks, I don't understand.

- Not that I mind, - But I don't know who you are.

My name is Diana St. Clair.

Diana St. Clair.

- Well, you're the most - Gorgeous spy I've ever seen.

Excuse me.

I seem to be bumping

your binoculars.

Now, where were we?

Doesn't my name mean

anything to you?

Diana? Sure.

- You're the goddess - Of the hunt, right?

In a way. But haven't you

read any of my books?

- Your what?

- My books.

- I wrote - "10 Ways To Trap A Bachelor."

That was a bestseller

for two years.

- I, uh, I think I missed it. - Oh.

Well, how about "The Mating

Habits of the Single Male?"

You wrote that?

- Did you read it?

- No, but I saw the movie.

[whistles]

- Why are you spying on me?

- For my new book.

"The Sex Life of Mike McCoy?"

Bet that would make an

interesting movie.

- Now, wait a minute, - If you get any ideas...

Look, I'm writing a book called

"The Perfect American Male."

I've already done chapters

on the doctor, the lawyer

the athlete, the businessman

the white-collar worker,

the factory worker...

- Now you're scraping - The bottom of the barrel.

- Right.

- Okay.

But why spy?

- Let's make ourselves - Comfortable.

I'll tell you all about it.

- Boy, nothing like a fire.

- It is kind of romantic.

- A shame to waste it. - What do you mean, waste it?

You know, if we had some girls

here, you know what I mean?

What am I, a hound dog?

Oh, I didn't mean that.

You know, Les, I was just...

How about that Mike?

Hey, here we are

in the middle of nowhere

and he comes up with a girl.

Hey, where you going?

- Where you going, buddy?

- I'm turning in.

Buddy, pal, guy, Louie, Norman.

I'm gonna join a girls' band.

[quirky music]

[grunts]

This is Diana St. Clair,

the famous authoress.

- Hi. - Hi there.

Well, you remember her?

- Didn't you write - "10 Ways To Trap A Bachelor?"

- And "The Mating Habits - Of the Single Male?"

- Yes, I did.

- That was a great book.

I saw the movie,

and it was dirty.

- Ah, it was truly an - Intellectual experience.

Yes, ma'am, I was deeply moved.

- I can't recall when - A literary episode

- completely captured the crux - Of the situation...

- Fellas!

- I read that book.

Uh, we have to

restring our guitars.

Why?

We have to restring our guitars.

Oh, yeah.

We have to restring our guitars.

[chuckles]

- (Diana) - 'Nice.'

- (Mike) - 'What? The fire?'

The way you got

rid of your friends.

Cool.

- We've had lots of practice.

- I can believe it.

The fire's nice, too.

- You really live like - Gypsies, don't you?

It's the way we like to live.

- Are you serious about - This book of yours?

Very much so.

Well, why me?

I'm looking for the

perfect American male.

One thing that makes him perfect

is that he's different.

He's not like everyone else.

You're different.

[drum roll]

So is she.

[guitar music]

♪ All that I am ♪

♪ Or ever hope to be ♪

♪ Lies in your hands ♪

♪ You are my destiny ♪

♪ When you are in my arms ♪

♪ I rule the world ♪

♪ And when we're far apart ♪

♪ How cruel the world ♪

♪ All that I want ♪

♪ All that I want ♪

♪ Is to be near to you ♪

♪ To spend my life ♪

♪ To spend my life ♪

♪ Making it clear to you ♪

♪ You are my heart ♪

♪ My soul ♪

♪ My dream come true ♪

♪ All that I am ♪

♪ I am because of you ♪

♪ All that I want ♪

♪ All that I want ♪

♪ Is to be near to you ♪

♪ To spend my life ♪

♪ To spend my life ♪

♪ Making it clear to you ♪

♪ You are my heart ♪

♪ My soul ♪

♪ My dream come true ♪

♪ All that I am ♪

♪ I am because of you ♪

♪ Because of you ♪

♪ Because of you ♪♪

When you find this Mr. Perfect,

does he get some kind of award?

Oh, yes. He gets me.

Well, that's nice.

That's real nice.

[instrumental music]

Hey! Knock it off!

Somebody's trying to sleep!

He's a real guy.

Turned me down flat.

- Who turned you down?

- Your Mike McCoy.

- I offered him $5,000.

- I knew you'd like him.

He drives a Duesenberg,

he races a Cobra

and he told me to go to hell.

He's quite a boy.

Yes, I know.

I mean, he knows how to handle

a car. I've seen him do it.

And that big road

race coming up..

The Fox Five!

- You want Mike - To drive it for you.

- He's pretty well-known, - Isn't he?

Oh, just one of the

best singers in the country.

Ah, no wonder they

call you Foxy Foxhugh.

Now, that's not a bit kind.

- After all, I'm doing him - A big favor.

- Think of the publicity - He'll get.

A big boost for his career.

I can see it now,

"Famous singer wins big race."

You mean,

"Famous singer wins big race

in new Fox Five car."

Never entered my mind.

Oh!

- Philip! - Yes, sir!

- Make a note to call - My public relations director.

Oh, Foxy, aren't you

glad I wanted him

for my birthday present?

First, he'll sing for you

and then he'll drive for me.

- But Mr. Foxhugh, you said - He turned you down flat.

- Philip, you know what happens - When you get excited.

- Don't worry, he'll - Be here on your birthday

and he'll be in that race, too.

- But that's wrong. - Y-you can't force a man!

- And besides h-he told you - To go to hell.

Philip!

You're fired.

Oh, daddy, what did

you do that for?

- You know Philip faints - When he gets upset.

Philip is 26 years old.

It's time he stopped fainting.

Well, he's sensitive.

- Well, I'd better get going. - It's a busy day.

The proxy fight, the big merger,

and, uh, your birthday present.

You will get him?

- They don't call me - Foxy for nothing.

Ooh.

[chuckles]

Uh, and Mr. Foxhugh, I think

it's more than enough...

He's gone, Philip.

Oh.

[drum roll]

- ["Never Say Yes" - By Elvis Presley]

♪ Look out now

I'm running wild ♪

♪ There ain't no

holding back this child ♪

♪ I guess you'd say

I'm a son of a gun ♪

- ♪ Living just for a - Life of fun ♪

♪ Here's the secret

of my success ♪

♪ Never say yes no no

never say yes ♪

♪ Life has taught me

one big lesson ♪

♪ Always keeps

the girls guessin' ♪

- ♪ Tell 'em that - You love them so ♪

- ♪ You hate to leave - But you gotta go ♪

♪ That's the secret

of my success ♪

♪ Never say yes no no

never say yes ♪

- ♪ It's the oldest - Game in the world ♪

♪ And you gotta know

how to play it ♪

♪ Tell her yes in so many ways ♪

♪ And never ever say it ♪

♪ That's how I keep going on ♪

♪ Here today tomorrow gone ♪

♪ That's the kind

of life for me ♪

♪ Being free like I want to be ♪

♪ Here's the secret

of my success ♪

♪ Never say yes no no

never say yes ♪

- ♪ It's the oldest - Game in the world ♪

- ♪ And you gotta know - How to play it ♪

♪ Tell her yes in so many ways ♪

♪ And never ever say it ♪

♪ And that's how

I keep going on ♪

♪ Here today tomorrow gone ♪

- ♪ That's the kind - Of life for me ♪

♪ Being free like I want to be ♪

♪ Here's the secret

of my success ♪

♪ Never say yes no no

never say yes ♪

♪ No no never say yes ♪♪

Mike? Mike? Oh, Mike!

Oh, hiya, Harry.

I'll be right with you.

Listen, Les, on your solo,

really open up, okay?

Got you.

- Let's try that - Next-to-last number, okay?

- Mike. - Just a minute, Harry.

Mike, before you waste

any more time rehearsing..

- What's the matter, pal? - I thought we were sold out.

Sold out? Canceled out!

- Canceled? I won't quit. - What are you talking about?

- All the years I've been - In the business, such a

catastrophe I didn't see, ever!

Well, who'd cancel us out?

"Dear Mr. McCoy

- "this is to confirm your - Appearance in Santa Barbara

"on the evening of the 15th

"on completion of your

concert for my daughter

- "I shall instantly have - Your schedule reinstated.

"Enclosed, please find

check for $5,000.

Sincerely, Howard Foxhugh."

- Our whole tour has been - Canceled! That miserable...

- Can he do that?

- He did it.

I'm sorry, Harry.

- He likes to hear you - Sing, huh, this grown man?

It's not him, it's his kid.

Mm, he must've broken into

his kid's piggy bank.

Sorry, Mike.

She must be some kid. $5000.

- I'd like to see - What she looks like.

- Any brat who could get her old - Man to pull a stunt like this.

Yeah. Can I feel the check?

She's probably ugly.

A rich, ugly girl.

- She'd better be, or I'll... - Yeah, c-can I feel the check?

- Mike, we're not gonna let him - Get away with this.

- What I should do is give him - A good, swift kick in his...

Watch it!

I have to show him

who he's fooling with.

- Of course, if I did that, - He'd probably

- mess up our whole tour, - And, uh

- we'd have to go - Back up there anyway.

So it looks like our best bet is

- sing the one song - And get it over with.

- Yeah, might as well.

- Mm-hm.

Okay. Santa Barbara. Let's go.

- (Diana) - I'm ready.

I kind of like Santa Barbara.

- Hm, I haven't seen you - Spying around lately.

Miss me?

Well, here it is again.

"Okay, fellas,

restring your guitars."

And I'll hit her

with my snare drum.

- How's the book going? - Finished.

I sent it in yesterday.

Which reminds me,

shall we set a date?

A date for what?

- My publisher has - To send out announcements.

Your publisher?

- He's always wanted - A big church wedding.

- Besides, he thinks - It will help sell my new book.

Now, what are you talking about?

Mike!

- You've forgotten.

- Forgotten what?

Didn't I tell you?

You're my perfect man.

Well, you don't

know me very well.

Remember what I said I'd do

when I found my perfect man?

Uh, yeah.

- You said he gets you.

- That's right.

And as soon as I domesticate

you, get you housebroken

you'll be the best husband

a girl ever had.

Husband?

[clang]

Over my dead body.

I'll, uh, I'll see you around.

- Let's go. - 'Mike?'

I'm going to marry you.

Well, almost ready?

- I don't know how long I can - Keep Cynthia out of here.

She opened the rest

of her presents yet?

- Look, Mike, I'm sorry I had to - Use such high-pressure methods

- to get you here, but believe me, - You won't regret it.

- You're gonna change - My whole life, huh?

Maybe. I saw you win

at Sebring last year

- with a car that shouldn't - Even have been entered.

- Sebring? - What you got on your mind?

- I'm bringing out a new racing - Car, the Fox Five.

How'd you like to drive it?

- Look, mister, I'm here - To do a song, and that's all.

- As soon as I'm finished, - I'm getting out of here.

- If I'm lucky, it's the - Last I'll ever see of you.

- Where's the birthday girl? - Here she is.

- Surprised?

- Yeah.

Mike, sing something sweet.

["Am I Ready"

[by Elvis Presley]

♪ Am I ready ♪

♪ Can my heart be true? ♪

♪ Am I ready ♪

♪ To fall in love with you ♪

♪ One love ♪

♪ One girl ♪

♪ One dream shared by two ♪

♪ Am I ready ♪

♪ To fall in love with you ♪

♪ I have touched your lips ♪

♪ And now I know ♪

♪ I would be a fool ♪

♪ To let you go ♪

♪ Should I ♪

♪ Could I ♪

♪ How I wish I knew ♪

♪ Am I ready ♪

♪ To fall in love with you ♪

♪ Should I ♪

♪ Could I ♪

♪ How I wish I knew ♪

♪ Am I ready ♪

♪ To fall in love with you ♪

♪ Fall in love ♪

♪ With you ♪♪

- Alright, let's wrap it up - And get out of here.

Hey, Les, you know,

you were wrong.

- She is rich. - But she's not ugly.

I know. I know.

Mike, it was marvelous.

It was just marvelous.

- You're really too much.

- No, you're too much.

- You ran me off a - Bridge into a creek.

- You messed up my car. - You canceled my tour.

- Are you still - Angry about your car?

Daddy will buy you a new one.

Oh, daddy will buy me a new one.

- Anything goes because - Daddy can pay for it, right?

- I almost got killed. - Can he pay for that, too?

The way he paid to get me here?

But, Mike, it's my birthday.

Oh, it's your birthday? Well,

who are you? George Washington?

- You and your daddy can take...

- I just want to see you again.

So you had daddy buy me, huh?

- If that's the only way - You can get a guy

you're really pathetic.

I'm sorry.

I'm really very sorry.

Uh, well, look,

just take it easy.

I am pathetic.

I'm-I'm worse than pathetic.

I'm spoiled,

and I'm selfish and...

- Why, just a little, maybe. - No, a lot.

I'm spoiled, and I'm ugly.

You may be spoiled,

but you're not ugly.

I am ugly. I'm miserable.

I'm very lonely. And..

When I saw you,

I just wanted you so badly.

And..

Just why did I have to ruin it?

Well, just take it easy.

[sobbing]

I'm just awful.

- You're not awful. - You're just a little...

- What?

- A little..

Uh, a little..

[instrumental music]

- Mike, where are you going? - Out of here. Just out...

- Excuse me. - Mike, be at the track at 6:00.

- Give you a chance - To test-drive the car.

I guarantee you've never

seen anything like it.

- I designed it myself. - And I'm proud of it.

And you're the man to drive it.

- Forget it. Forget me. - Forget her. Forget everything.

- Now, look, Mike... - Forget it.

[exhales sharply]

Sweetheart, my publisher

wants a list of your relatives.

Now, don't be upset.

- He's agreed to a - Small wedding

- but he insists - On a large reception.

- Uh, look, I'm not marrying you. - I'm not marrying her.

- I'm not marrying anybody. - I'm staying single. Single!

Single! Single!

Single! Single!

[engine starts]

And then he kissed me.

Kissed you?

That wasn't in the deal.

That's disgusting.

- Oh, wait till somebody kisses - You. You'll feel differently.

Well, we've got to do something.

We've got to get him back.

- Wait a minute, Cynthia, - You're not serious about Mike.

- I mean, I want him to drive - The Fox Five for me

- but he's not my idea - Of a son-in-law.

Now, daddy, stop acting

like a father.

- I want him back for you.. - Oh.

Because of the Fox Five.

- Boy, if he drives it - The way he drove at Sebring.

- Oh, yes. Can't you just see - Those headlines now?

"Singer speeds to victory

in fabulous Fox Five race car."

May I ask?

How can he speed to victory

if he is not there?

Philip, don't be technical.

Maybe if we could keep him

in Santa Barbara for a while

we could persuade him.

To drive your car, I mean.

- No, I'm afraid - We've pushed him too far.

Mr. Foxhugh, you'll never be

able to make him stay, sir.

- Foxy? - Hmm?

Uh, excuse us, Philip.

Stay where you are.

[indistinct whispering]

I was thinking..

[indistinct whispering]

[chuckles]

Cynthia, you're a

chip off the old block.

Operator?

[siren wailing]

[dramatic music]

- Mr. McCoy?

- Yes, sir.

Mr. McCoy, uh..

- Look, officer, i-if we're - On private property...

Oh, just call me Tracy.

- Tracy Richards. - Tracy.

- Pleased to meet you, fellas. - Hello.

Okay, flatfoot.

Cut the soft sell.

- What's the charge?

- Charge? Uh..

Hey... that's not a béarnaise

sauce, is it, fella?

I'm not a fella. I'm a girl!

- Fantastic.

- Yeah, it's a..

The sauce béarnaise.

- What's it to you, copper? - Well, you see...

- Look, officer, if we have - To pay a fine or something...

Sorry, it's worse than a fine.

Sir, can they give you

the chair for trespassing?

- You have to leave town. - We're leaving. We're leaving.

- Just hold it a minute. - Hold a minute.

- What do you mean, - We have to leave?

- I got my orders. A complaint's - Been made by, uh

an influential

citizen, and, uh..

Hey, that can't be

potatoes Provençale.

Who says it can't?

Could that influential

citizen be named Foxhugh?

Can he do this to us?

- Ah, you don't live here. - You don't work here.

He's a big shot. I'm sorry.

- That's alright. - No hard feelings.

- Can we leave in the morning? - Sure.

- Who does he think he is, - Kicking people out of town

in the middle of the night, huh?

- Thanks, Tracy.

- Alright.

Well, uh, so long, Mike.

- Be seeing you. - Yeah.

Hey, uh, maybe we can

swap some recipes sometime.

I'm a gourmet cook, too.

You are? No kidding!

- Nice to have met you, - Officer Tracy.

Yeah, yeah.

- So long, Mike. - Yeah.

- You know, he's not a bad guy. - Is he really a copper?

- Sure, that's the new breed.

- Yeah?

Well, Mike, maybe we'd better

load up and get out of here.

Mike?

- If you let guys like - Foxhugh push you around

- they start to think - They own you, and they don't.

- He made us come in - The town, but he can't

- make us leave until - We're ready to leave.

- Yeah, but you heard - What Tracy said.

We don't work here.

We don't live here.

- What if we did live here?

- We really don't live here.

- What if we moved in - Next door to Foxhugh?

Next door to him?

Pitch our tents?

- Yeah, but there's - No field there.

Right. Just another big mansion.

That's what I mean.

- How would you like - To live in that mansion?

- I'd like to live - In that mansion.

- How are you gonna do that? - Yeah, how you gonna do that?

- I think I'd better - Start some investigating.

Oh, well, it's a waste of time

if we're leaving tonight.

- Who said anything about leaving? - We're staying right here.

[knocking on door]

Oh, good morning, uh..

- Uh, Blodgett, sir.

- Oh, Blodgett, sure.

- Uh, are they still - Having breakfast?

- Yes, sir. Oh, no, no, no.

- At the pool?

Mr. and Mrs. Ranley never

have breakfast at the pool.

Oh. The same as always, huh?

- They're on the, uh.. - North terrace, sir.

- The north terrace..

- Whom shall I say?

- I-I'd like to surprise them. - Uh, well, you know.

Huh! Oh, yes, of course, sir.

Uh, this way, sir.

[instrumental music]

- Good morning, folks.

- Good morning.

Good mor..

- Who are you?

- Mike McCoy.

Mr. Ranley, uh, I have

a message for you.

- Is it okay to speak - In front of this young lady?

Young lady?

- Oh, this is my wife.

- 'Are you sure?'

Of course I'm sure.

Yes, we've been

married 38 years.

Thirty-seven.

- He is your husband?

- Why..

- Y-yes. That's Bernard.

- You weren't sure, were you?

You both had to sneak

an extra look. You know why?

- Because you haven't really - Looked at each other

in a long, long time.

Tell me, Bernard,

what did you see

- just then when you - Looked at, uh..

- Violet.

- Violet.

That's a very lovely name.

Bernard, when you looked

at her just then

did you see the beautiful

woman that you married?

- Well, I... - 'Well, you should have.'

'She's very, very beautiful.'

Why, thank you, young man.

Violet, when you

looked at Bernard

did you see the tall,

handsome, vigorous man

that you married 37 years ago?

Well, did you?

- Violet..

- Oh, no, i-it's not her fault.

After all, I'm not as handsome

- as I used to be. - Nor as young, either.

- Well, you're not as old - As you're behaving, either.

And neither are you.

When was the last time

you had some fun?

- Well, when?

- Well, on our honeymoon.

- Violet!

- 'It's true.'

- When we got back, you went to - Work for papa, and ever since...

Well, we'll have to do

something about this. Okay?

- Okay. - Okay?

Okay.

A 1929 Duesenberg.

Just like the one papa gave us

for our first honeymoon.

They sure don't make them

like that anymore.

- Bernard, please.

- Hm..

Oh, oh, you mean the car.

Oh, Mike..

- How can we ever thank you? - How can we thank you?

- It's very nice of you - To take care

of the house while we're gone.

Forget it.

You folks just live it up.

- Goodbye! - Buh-bye

- Have a good time. - Have a real good time.

Don't worry about the house.

- Hey, you did it, Mike! - We're Foxhugh's neighbors.

- Let's go borrow a cup of sugar, - Or do something neighborly.

- Just a minute. - Let him find out by himself.

- Oh.. - It'll be a big surprise.

- I just hope - We don't get surprised.

Hm?

- That kid of his, - She's so gruesome

she might try something.

Well, you know,

I really feel sorry for her.

- Anybody who looks like that.. - Ugh!

You're out of your mind.

The Santa Fe road race

will cover 250 miles

of very dangerous driving.

But my confidence in

the Fox Five is such

that I am offering $50,000

to the winner of the race..

and $10,000 to any

car that manages

to finish ahead of the Fox Five.

- Philip, are you a millionaire? - No, sir.

- Then shut up and keep writing. - Yes, sir.

Besides, with McCoy driving

- the publicity we get - Will be worth it.

But you don't have Mr. McCoy.

Oh, yes, we do.

Just come with me.

[instrumental music]

It worked. It worked.

How about that?

- I knew he'd come back, - But I never figured

he'd move in next door.

Cynthia. Cynthia.

Mr. Foxhugh..

- What has he done - With the Ranleys?

- Oh, shh, Philip. - Oh..

I bet he has them bound

and gagged in the cellar.

I thought he looked

like a criminal.

- Bye. - Where are you going?

- Oh, you don't think - I'm going over there

dressed like this. Bye.

- Philip, come on.

- Yes, sir.

[screams]

[water splashes]

[upbeat music]

♪ When you're through swimming ♪

♪ I'll dry your back ♪

♪ Come and relax girl ♪

♪ In my little beach shack ♪

What you say now?

- ♪ Dumb-di-dumb-di-dumb - Yeah-yeah-yeah ♪

♪ There'll be

nothing you'll lack ♪

♪ It's a pleasure

to welcome you ♪

♪ In my little beach shack

come together now ♪

♪ In my beach shack

baby we'll be alone ♪

♪ In my beach shack ♪

♪ I'll make you feel at home ♪

♪ Take off that wet cap ♪

♪ Let down your hair ♪

♪ Come to my beach shack ♪

♪ You'll be comfortable there

you believe me now ♪

♪ Dumb-di-dumb-di-dumb

yeah-yeah-yeah ♪

♪ Be my guest have a snack ♪

♪ See how nice I feed company ♪

♪ In my little beach shack ♪

[indistinct]

♪ In my beach shack ♪

♪ Baby we'll be alone ♪

♪ In my beach shack ♪

♪ I'll make you feel at home ♪

♪ Come see my etchings ♪

♪ I wish you would ♪

♪ Don't be afraid girl ♪

♪ My intentions are good

you believe me now ♪

♪ Dumb-di-dumb-di-dumb

yeah-yeah-yeah ♪

♪ I know girls by the pack ♪

♪ There's no one

I want there but you ♪

♪ In my little beach shack ♪

♪ In my beach shack

baby we'll be alone ♪

♪ In my beach shack

I'll make you feel at home ♪

♪ In my little beach shack ♪♪

Hi, neighbor.

- You're on private - Property, McCoy.

- You're trespassing - This time. I live here.

- What have you done - With the Ranleys?

Philip suspects foul play.

Where are they?

They're bound and

gagged in the cellar.

Blodgett.

- Yes, sir? - The jig's up.

- You might as well spill the - Beans about Mr. and Mrs. R.

Very good, sir.

Mr. and Mrs. Ranley

departed this morning

on a journey of

undetermined length..

in an effort to renew

'the ardor of their

initial nuptial vows.'

That's what the man said.

During their absence, uh

Mr. McCoy and party

will reside at Ranley Manor.

Sorry, pal. No bodies.

- We're here, and there's - Nothing you can do about it.

Thank you, Blodgett.

How do you like that?

I like it.

And I like a man who

can make up his mind.

Delicious.

May I have one?

- Give him one.

- Certainly.

[screams]

Hm.

- I knew you'd be back. Mm-hm. - You did?

- Remember last night, when you - Told me I was a spoiled brat?

- Yeah, I remember. - And I said you were right?

- Look, I don't want to - Go through it again.

You were right. I am spoiled,

but I always get what I want.

Up until now maybe...

I wanted you to sing

for me, you did.

- I wanted you to stay in - Santa Barbara, you're here.

- Now, wait a minute, - I'm here because

- your father tried to - Run me out of town.

Of course. We knew if we tried

to make you stay, you'd go.

- So we figured the - Simplest way to get you

to stay was to tell you to go.

- So we told you to go, - And here you are.

So, see? I got what I wanted.

- You're quite a girl.

- You're quite a guy.

Mike, there's something

else I want.

- Well, do you want - To tell me now

or should I wait till

after you get it?

[chuckles]

I want you.

- Huh?

- I'm going to marry you.

[ding]

Come and get it!

- (Les) - 'Come and get it.'

'Come and get it.'

[instrumental music]

Remember, Mike,

I always get what I want.

I can do better than that.

[instrumental music]

- She's not going - To get you, Mike.

- I am.

- We've got trouble.

Oh, boy, we got troubles.

Those girls mean business.

Yeah. We've got to save

him from those two, ugh, hags.

Now, what takes a

guy's mind off girls?

A new racing car.

Yes? Hold on, please.

- It's for you, sir.

- Thank you, Philip.

- Hello.

- Hello. Mr. Foxhugh?

Would you like a certain someone

to drive your car in the race?

What's that?

Do I want Mr. McCoy to drive

my car? I certainly do.

Good! Then be

at the speedway in..

- [clears throat] - I mean..

Be at the speedway in one hour

- and-and bring - The Fox Five with you.

We'll see to it

that McCoy is there.

Now, this is very important.

You must..

[chuckles]

Fine. Wonderful.

I'll be there.

Thanks, fella.

I'm not a fella!

I'm a girl!

[clanging]

It's a good idea, huh, Mike

- come out here - To work on the car?

No. Why do I have to leave a

- bunch of gorgeous girls and come - Out here on this dirt track?

- We figured it'd take your - Mind off your problems.

Problems? Who's got problems?

Well, since I'm out here

- I might as well check - The new fuel pump.

Close it up.

Something's not kosher here.

You sure know how to hurt a guy.

- Start her up, will you, Curly? - Yeah.

I'll bet she'll go

like crazy now.

- I'll blow her out, then we'll - Check out the new carburetors.

[engine revving]

Hey, uh, what did he mean,

"not kosher?"

[whistles]

[whistles]

[tires screeching]

[engine revving]

[tires screeching]

[whistles]

Boy, that car is something else.

- Yeah. - Beautiful.

- It passed you like you - Were standing still.

Hm.

- Man. - You like it?

It's terrific!

Hop in.

- Would you like to drive her? - Sure.

- What are you after now? - Who, me?

- You sure pulled a fast one - To get me to stay here.

[laughs]

a fast one now.

Okay, then I'm pulling

There's a big road

race coming up.

Is it the car's first time out?

And I want you there,

right where you are now.

- Look, Mike, I'm gonna - Level with you.

- This car can do it. - It can take it all.

Well, then you don't need me.

Oh, you're an insurance policy.

- Imagination built this car. It - Needs imagination to drive it.

That's why I want you.

Mister, if she feels as good as

she looks, you've got a deal.

[car revs]

- Yeah, we did it!

- Yeah!

- Yeah! - Come on!

- Sure knows how to - Handle that car.

- Well, best race driver - On any track.

- Well, looks like - Your plan worked.

Yeah.

- You seem pretty anxious - To have Mike drive for me.

Oh, well, the prize

money's good.

- You see, Mr. Foxhugh, if - We keep him busy driving..

he won't have any

time for your kid.

- [groans] - Hey, what did you kick me for?

- Cynthia and Mike? - Yeah.

- If we don't break this up, - They're liable to do something

terrible, like getting married.

- Ow! - What'd you kick me for?

It's nothing to worry about.

Cynthia isn't even Mike's type.

- Oh, sure. Who'd want to marry - A gorgeous millionairess?

- Yeah.

- Not me.

[screams]

Oh, ow! Ow!

[car revving]

- Hm. - Mister, you got yourself a deal.

I'm glad you like the car.

- I'm gonna give you - The chance to drive it

- but you've got to - Promise me one thing.

- Well, let's have it.

- Don't encourage Cynthia.

Cynthia? What's she

got to do with it?

- Well, I didn't mind you - Singing for her.

- That was a birthday - Present, but..

- ...now she's talking - About marriage

and that, of course,

is out of the question.

- Are you trying to say that I'm - Good enough to drive your car

- but I'm not good enough - To marry your daughter?

- Oh, no, Mike, - Don't put it that way.

Okay, I'll put it this way.

- If I wanna marry - Cynthia and she wants to

marry me, we'll get married.

- As for your car, - You can drive it yourself.

- And one other thing. - What?

You're not gonna win that race.

[car revving]

- That man's got to - Be taught a lesson.

Mike, you're gonna marry

Cynthia just to teach him?

That'd really shake him up.

- Philip? - No, thank you, sir.

Champagne bubbles make me faint.

- Everything makes you faint. - Yes, sir.

- Ooh, champagne! - What's the occasion?

- We're celebrating! - Oh, Philip?

No, thanks. Uh,

champagne makes me faint.

The bubbles.

- Celebrating what?

- Your marriage to Mike.

- [clinking] - To Mrs. McCoy.

Well, it's not exactly settled...

Well, it's a mere formality.

- I think Mike will - Be good for you.

You, uh, you need

a new kind of life.

- What new kind of life? - Oh..

Traveling on the road,

living in those funny tents.

- Let's see, there'll be - Larry, Curly, and Les.

- You could take trombone - Lessons and join the combo.

When we get married, that's

all over. We'll live here.

- Mike can head up your new - Sports car division.

- He's perfect for it. - Don't I know it.

But, honey, he's a free soul.

- You put him in a cage, - He'll suffocate.

- No. He's got to go on doing - Just as he's always done.

- And if you're his wife... - Wait a minute.

Did you say "trombone lessons?"

- Or tenor sax, or... What?

- Wait a minute!

- I knew there was something fishy - About this whole thing.

Fishy? Come on!

Foxy, this is me,

Cynthia, remember?

A chip off the old block.

You made up this whole thing.

You don't want me to marry Mike.

You're not going to marry him.

- Why, you are a snob!

- I am not!

My hip, modern daddy is a snob!

- And I told him to stay - Away from you.

[scoffs]

Oh, that was a big mistake.

Now he'll never drive your car.

Who needs him?

I'll drive it myself.

Oh!

Now look, honey,

I am not a snob.

Mike's a great guy.

I like him.

- You need somebody - Who's ready to settle down.

- (Howard) - 'A solid citizen.'

Somebody, uh, your own kind.

Somebody who's dependable.

Somebody like..

Well, like... like Philip.

[instrumental music]

- You take it. - Oh!

- You may as well get - Used to the idea.

- I am going to marry Mike.

- Oh-ho.

[instrumental music]

- You alright?

- Yeah. It's alright.

Watch the bubbles.

Hey, how come I've to

be the grease monkey?

Isn't this Les' job!

- She's inside cooking dinner. - Oh.

Watch out under there.

I just loosened the oil line.

Now you tell me.

[laughs]

- (Curly) - 'Taste good?'

[soft music]

[tires screeching]

[instrumental music]

[knock on door]

Come in.

- What is this, a raid?

- Yeah. Reach for the ceiling.

Alright. Now, turn around.

Huh! Well!

- Just wanted to see - If you packed a gun.

Okay, copper, where's

your search warrant?

Oh, no search warrant.

No, I just dropped by to say

- well, I'm - Glad you decided to stay.

- Yeah? That's the - First welcome wagon

I've ever seen with

a siren on it.

Hey, hey, hey..

Keep your mitts off!

If you want something to eat

have some pate maison.

Thanks.

Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm!

- You make this yourself? - Yeah.

[chomping]

It's got truffles in it.

Yeah. You know, I only

put in a little bit.

Most people can't tell.

- Well, I'm a gourmet cook, too. - Remember?

Oh, yeah. I forgot.

- I'll bet you're good.

- Not as good as you.

Say, uh, Leslie, uh..

[sighs]

Lester.

Uh, Les, I know we

just met and all, but, uh..

I-I'd like to show

you my stuff, too.

- Etchings, huh?

- No, no, no.

- I mean, - I want to cook for you.

Uh, will you have

dinner with me tonight?

Maybe.

What are you gonna have?

- Well, uh, how about escargot?

- Yeah.

- And bouillabaisse.

- Yeah.

And cantaloupe glace.

Oh, yeah.

- Boy, am I bushed.

- What a day.

Yeah. Me, too.

I think it was worth it, though.

We're gonna give Foxhugh

a run for his money.

I think she's just about ready.

Well, I'm ready for some

of Les' good food.

I think she said she was gonna

make a whipped-cream cake.

Oh, I wonder what we're

gonna have for dessert?

Would you believe a

whipped-cream cake?

Les?

- Hey, Les!

- Where's Les?

I wonder where she is.

- "I'm out having - Dinner with a friend."

- I thought you were - Gonna eat with us.

A friend? Wonder who she is.

- It's not a she, it's a he. - Who he?

- What about the - Whipped-cream cake?

- "I'll save you each a piece of - The whipped-cream cake

if he and I don't eat it all."

Why, are they gonna eat it all?

How do you like that?

- I like it. You know, - She doesn't get out enough.

A girl needs a guy.

And a guy needs a girl.

You've had a tough day,

and she's waiting for you.

- She slips a tall drink - Into your hand

- and sits you down - In a soft chair.

- Then she massages the - Kinks out of your neck..

- ...with those soft, - Silky fingers.

- And then? - Then you have dinner. A steak.

- Rare? - Rare.

- And a big pitcher of beer. - Cold?

- Ice cold.

- And then whipped-cream cake?

[whistles]

[instrumental music]

Hello, darling.

- Oh, you've had a rough day.

- How did you know?

You just come with me, love.

How did she get in here?

I didn't let her in.

Did you let her in?

[indistinct chatter]

- Time to restring your - Guitars, boys.

- We already did that. - Well, do it again.

- Well, that's silly. - Could be.

Now, don't argue with Mike.

You know he's had a rough day.

Watch it!

- She acts like a wife. - And he acts like he likes it.

[instrumental music]

There. Isn't that comfy?

Yeah. Feels good.

Those, uh, cool, silky fingers.

- As soon as you've finished your - Drink, we'll have dinner.

- I've got... Yes!

- A steak?

- And a big pitcher of beer, - Ice cold beer?

- Why, yes.

- And then?

And then..

[soft music]

- Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

- Can you hear them?

Then what are you

uh-huhing about?

I can't figure that Mike out.

- First it's Diana, then Cynthia, - Then Cynthia and Diana.

It doesn't matter which one.

- If he gets married, - It's goodbye combo.

Goodbye dolce vita!

What keeps a guy's

mind off the girls?

- A new racing car. - Right!

Now if we can..

- We've done that!

- I forgot.

Now your best friend

is hung up on a girl..

- How do you save him? - Get him a different girl.

- Yeah, but what if he's hung - Up on two girls?

- You get him lots and lots - Of different girls.

- That'll save him.

- Right!

What did I say?

Lots and lots of girls.

["Spinout" by

[Elvis Presley]

♪ When her motor's warm ♪

♪ And she's purrin' sweet ♪

♪ Buddy let me warn ya ♪

♪ You're on a one-way street ♪

♪ She'll crowd ya close

spin your wheels ♪

♪ Then you're gonna

know how it feels ♪

♪ To spinout yeah spinout ♪

♪ Better watch those curves ♪

♪ Never let her steer ♪

♪ If she can shake

your nerves boy ♪

♪ Then she can strip

your gears ♪

♪ She'll get you hot

and goin' fast ♪

♪ Then she'll let

you run out of gas ♪

♪ So spinout yeah ♪

♪ Spinout ♪

♪ A road to love is

full of danger signs ♪

♪ Too many guys were lost ♪

♪ Who crossed those

double lines ♪

♪ Don't you know

she's out to prove ♪

♪ She can really score ♪

♪ Never saw parts move boy ♪

♪ Like that before ♪

♪ To flag you down

that's her goal ♪

♪ Scoot before you

lose control ♪

♪ And spinout yeah ♪

♪ Spinout ♪

♪ A road to love

is full of ♪

♪ Danger signs ♪

♪ Too many guys were lost who

crossed those double lines ♪

♪ Don't you know

she's out to prove ♪

♪ She can really score ♪

♪ Never saw parts move boy ♪

♪ Like that before ♪

♪ To flag you down

that's her goal ♪

♪ Scoot before you

lose control ♪

♪ And spinout

hey hey hey hey hey hey hey ♪

♪ Spinout ♪

♪ Let me hear you spinout ♪♪

[cheering]

Give Mike a girl

and he's one happy fella.

Give Mike lots of girls

and I'm one happy fella.

- You're not a fella.

- You're a girl.

Hey! You remembered!

Every girl in Santa Barbara

is at Mike's party and I'm here.

Well, you weren't invited.

- Oh, that's my daddy. - He always says the right thing.

That's what fathers are for.

Listen to that.

- The night before a race - And he's throwing a big party.

- Are you sure you wanna - Move your queen there?

Certainly.

Checkmate.

Well, I've got a year

or two on Mike.

And if I'm gonna drive tomorrow,

I'd better get some sleep.

- Good night, honey.

- Good night.

- Good night, Philip.

- Good night, sir.

Cynthia, I'll take

you to the party.

Oh, Philip.

- What did you say?

- I-I-I said...

I heard what you said.

We weren't invited.

Maybe they'd throw us out.

- Cynthia, I-I don't want you to - Think that I'm boasting..

- But I'm as much a man...

- Now, Philip, don't faint.

- I-I have no intention - Of fainting.

- And if you wish to go to the - Party tonight, I'll take you.

And if they think they're

gonna keep us out, I'll..

- [chuckles] - I'll..

Well, just let them try.

Well, I'll go up and change.

Now, don't go away.

[instrumental music]

[upbeat music]

Alright!

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

Well, looks like our

troubles are over.

- There's nothing - Like a wild party

- to take your - Mind off girls.

Holy Toledo! The fuzz!

- What are we gonna do now?

- Relax. I'll handle him.

- Don't get him sore.

- Don't worry.

Hi there...

Fantastic!

I used your recipe.

Mine never tasted like this.

You want to help me

rustle up some more?

- I mean if you're not on duty.

- I'm not. I'm all yours.

This way, officer.

[instrumental music]

Alright! Alright!

Alright! Alright!

- Hi..

- Susan!

- How'd you like to - Get married, Susan?

Oh, not until

I'm 50, 55, maybe.

I'm with you!

Alright!

Hey, is she..

You weren't invited.

- Now, that's funny. I'm here.

- That's right. She's here.

Hey! Hey! Hey!

Alright!

Alright.

[music continues]

Hey, Les! Folks really

dig the hors d'oeuvres.

What's wrong with Les?

Oh! Hey, wait!

You weren't invited!

- Don't tell us you're here!

- Well, we are here!

And if you think you..

And if you think you..

I-I just thought, uh,

we'd be welcome.

That's alright, Philip.

We're here, and we're staying.

- Now, do you want to make - Something of it?

No, ma'am, not particularly.

- Do you?

- No. Have a good time.

- We're glad you could make it. - Thanks.

Cynthia, I failed you.

Oh, no, you didn't, Philip.

In fact, you did

something marvelous.

- I did?

- You didn't faint.

- [chuckles] - Hey, that's right!

[upbeat music]

Uh, see you later.

[upbeat music continues]

- Cynthia, I'd like - To talk to you!

- Later, Philip.

- Not later. Now.

Daddy! Well!

Fancy meeting you here.

Yeah.

I couldn't sleep, so here I am.

Cynthia, have fun.

- But do me a favor. - Forget about Mike.

She's not with Mike.

She's with me.

- Mr. Foxhugh? - Yes?

I think we have something

in common. Can we talk?

We certainly can.

[crowd cheering]

- Sit down.

- Philip.

Cynthia, I have to

say this to you now.

- Well, say it. - Hm?

- Go ahead.

- Oh.

A-and don't interrupt me!

- Ever since we were - Children, you know

our family has talked

about it, and..

- Do you mean us?

- Us.

We!

Philip, we are not

meant for each other.

Well, why not?

- Well, for one thing, - How can I marry you

when I'm gonna marry Mike?

Mike, Mike, Mike!

That's all I hear.

What do you see in him?

He is everything a woman wants.

He's strong,

brave, kind, and..

Well, he does things!

- Cynthia!

- Oh, Philip!

[applause]

I can do things, too.

Of course, I've never

been a father

- but it seems to me - That Cynthia and Mike..

- Just don't belong together. - You haven't told me your name.

Diana St. Clair.

Now, really, Mister...

Diana St..

You wrote "Mating Habits

of the Single Male."

Yes. Perhaps if you

sent her off to Europe...

Did you actually

dress up like a man

- and live with a - Platoon of marines?

You may think this is

just a silly crush...

Your analysis of the

mating motivation

was right on the button.

I admire an intelligent woman.

I know men,

and he's ripe! Now, if..

What did you say?

I said, "I admire

an intelligent woman."

Why, thank you.

What did you want with Mike?

That's why you're so concerned

about Cynthia, isn't it?

- I'm going to marry him.

- I don't get it!

Sure, he's an intelligent,

good-looking guy.

He has talent.

But why would a woman...

Hasn't Cynthia told you?

I'm not talking about Cynthia.

- I'm talking about you.

- Me?

Mr. Foxhugh, we've just met.

- You don't even know me.

- No?

- I've read everything - You've written

and believe me, I know you.

You told a lot of intimate

things about yourself.

In bed, you don't wear any...

- Okay, okay, you know me.

- Right.

- And I know the kind of man - You should marry.

- Not Mike? - No.

Well, he's not the man for you.

Sure, you need a man like Mike.

Somebody who's strong,

vigorous, with a mind of his own

but older, more mature.

Somebody who..

can appreciate

an intelligent woman.

Why, Mr. Foxhugh.

["Smorgasbord"

[by Elvis Presley]

♪ Some like their women short

♪ Some like them tall ♪

♪ I'll take them any size

'cause I love them all ♪

♪ I'm just wild

about smorgasbord ♪

♪ I got a cravin'

for smorgasbord ♪

♪ A little kiss here

a little kiss there ♪

♪ That's smorgasbord ♪

♪ Some take just apple pie

some take just cake ♪

♪ I'll take the dish I please

please the dish I take ♪

♪ I'm just wild

about smorgasbord ♪

♪ I got a cravin'

for smorgasbord ♪

♪ A little kiss here

a little kiss there ♪

♪ That's smorgasbord ♪

♪ Some like just

southern belles ♪

♪ They got a one track mind ♪

♪ I go for all the belles

except the wedding kind ♪

♪ I'm just wild

about smorgasbord ♪

♪ I got a cravin' for

smorgasbord ♪

♪ A little kiss here

a little kiss there ♪

♪ That's smorgasbord ♪

♪ Some like their women

short some like them tall ♪

♪ I'll take them any size

'cause I love them all ♪

♪ Mm-mm-mm ♪

♪ Some take just apple pie

some take just cake ♪

♪ I'll take the dish I please

take the please I dish.. ♪

[instrumental music]

- You know, she was right.

- She's not a fellow.

Boy, is she a girl!

It won't be so bad

if Mike marries Les.

- At least she can - Still play drums.

It's me. It had to be me.

I knew it from the first time

I played drums for you.

[instrumental music]

Hey, I want to talk to you.

- Hey, come on, Tracy, - What's the matter with you?

Okay, Mike, I want the facts!

Well, look, officer

- I was turning the corner - And this car...

- Forget the car. - Are you gonna marry Les?

- Mike, you're not - Gonna marry her.

Look, I told you Cynthia and I...

Not Cynthia. Diana.

- I'd like to know your intentions - Pertaining to Cynthia!

Huh?

- Uh, I gotta think about it. - You gotta think about it?

- I'll let you know - After the race.

I think better when I'm driving.

[instrumental music]

- Hey, Mike, uh, - Would you do us a favor?

- Yeah. - Win, and just keep on moving!

- We'll pick up the prize - Money and meet you later.

Are you kidding?

Oh! Mike! Mike!

Oh! Mike!

Oh! Mike! Thank you!

- Mwah! Thank you! - How was it?

- How was it? - We had a marvelous time!

- You look 20 years younger.

- Feel 20 years younger!

She drove the Duesenberg like

- the Dickens in time to - Get here for the race.

All drivers to their

starting positions!

Well, you got here just in time.

- Mr. Ranley. - Good luck. Good luck.

[engine revving]

- Good luck!

- Good luck to you.

You're gonna need it.

I'm gonna beat you, Mr. Foxhugh.

I'll beat the pants off you.

- I'll be waiting for - You at the finish line.

We'll see who's got pants on.

(man on PA)

'Twelve, eleven'

'ten, nine'

'eight, seven..'

- Philip?

- That's right.

- What are you doing here?

- I'm gonna win this race.

In what car?

- (man on PA) - 'And they're off!'

[crowd cheering]

[indistinct chatter]

[tires screeching]

Oh, Philip!

[engine revving]

[car beeping]

[tires screeching]

The Duesenberg!

He's going to race

the Duesenberg.

Oh, dear I knew we should have

stopped at the last gas station.

Hey, shorty!

What's the trouble?

- The battery's dead. - They've disqualified me.

Yeah?

[engine starts]

- She's still breathing! - Good.

- I'll tell you what. - I'll drive the car for you.

- If I win the race, you - Keep all the money, okay?

- (male announcer) - 'That's Mike McCoy taking over'

'Jody Blumquist's S.B. Special!'

[car revs]

I'm ahead! I'm ahead!

[engine revving]

[tires screeching]

Oh, I mustn't faint!

I musn't faint!

[tires screeching]

Ahh!

[tires screeching]

[tires screeching]

[indistinct yelling]

[tires screeching]

[tires screeching]

[engine revving]

[indistinct]

[babbling]

[tires screeching]

I'm ahead! I'm ahead!

[tires screeching]

[tires screeching]

[yelping]

[screams]

[tires screeching]

[engine revving]

[tires screeching]

- Look out! - Oh!

[crashing]

[engine revving]

[tires screeching]

Philip? You're fired!

Come on, Mike! Let's go!

[cheers]

- (male announcer) - 'And the winner is Mike McCoy'

'in Jody Blumquist's

S.B. Special!'

[cheers]

We did it! We won!

Congratulations.

- Thank you. - Well?

- Have you made up your mind? - Which one are you gonna marry?

[bell dinging]

I'm gonna marry all of them.

And that's just what I did.

[soft music]

I married Cynthia..

to Philip.

I married Diana..

to Howard.

And I married Les..

[soft music]

to Tracy.

As for me, I'm still

single. But..

[drum beat]

Alright!

["I'll Be Back" by

[Elvis Presley]

♪ Well I'll be back

yeah I'll be back ♪

♪ Like a homesick train

on a one-way track ♪

♪ I got to travel

and hit the gravel ♪

♪ But I'll be back ♪

♪ Yeah I'll be back ♪

♪ Well I'll return

I shall return ♪

♪ Don't cool those lips

we're gonna see them burn ♪

♪ 'Cause I'll be missing

your kind of kissing ♪

♪ But I'll be back ♪

♪ Yes I'll be back ♪

♪ Yeah there ain't

nobody to tell me ♪

♪ Stay or go oh no ♪

♪ And no one tells

the four winds ♪

♪ Where to blow oh oh oh ♪

♪ I'll be back

I'm coming back ♪

♪ Don't throw away

that welcome mat ♪

♪ The door I'm hoping ♪

♪ Will still be open ♪

♪ A teeny weenie crack ♪

♪ To your shack ♪

♪ So keep that

love light burnin' ♪

♪ 'Cause I'll be back ♪

♪ Yeah I'll be back ♪

♪ Yeah there ain't

nobody to tell me ♪

♪ Stay or go oh no ♪

♪ And no one tells

the four winds ♪

♪ Where to blow oh oh oh ♪

♪ I'll be back

I'm coming back ♪

♪ Don't throw away

that welcome mat ♪

♪ The door I'm hoping ♪

♪ Will still be open ♪

♪ A teeny weenie crack ♪

♪ To your shack ♪

♪ So keep that

love light burnin' ♪

♪ Huh I'll be back ♪

♪ Yeah I'll be back ♪

[cheers]

[instrumental music]

Alright!

♪ I'll be back ♪

[cheers and applause]

[instrumental music]