Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:19,895 --> 00:00:22,478
♪ Here we sit ♪
2
00:00:22,564 --> 00:00:23,975
♪ And we chatter ♪
3
00:00:24,066 --> 00:00:27,980
♪ What are we thinking of ♪
4
00:00:28,070 --> 00:00:30,027
♪ Let's not make ♪
5
00:00:30,113 --> 00:00:31,775
♪ With the patter ♪
6
00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:33,697
♪ Baby ♪
7
00:00:36,078 --> 00:00:38,491
♪ Let's make Io ve ♪
8
00:00:41,208 --> 00:00:45,122
♪ If you roar like a lion ♪
9
00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:49,001
♪ I could coo like a dove ♪
10
00:00:49,091 --> 00:00:52,960
♪ If you're sold, begin buyin' ♪
11
00:00:53,053 --> 00:00:55,636
♪ Baby ♪
12
00:00:57,057 --> 00:00:59,765
♪ Let's make Io ve ♪
13
00:01:00,936 --> 00:01:03,724
♪ No, don't turn TV ♪
14
00:01:03,814 --> 00:01:04,850
♪ On ♪
15
00:01:04,940 --> 00:01:07,603
♪ Instead just turn me ♪
16
00:01:07,693 --> 00:01:08,683
♪ On ♪
17
00:01:08,777 --> 00:01:12,862
♪ I light up like neon ♪
18
00:01:12,948 --> 00:01:15,782
♪ Just a tiny section of your affection ♪
19
00:01:15,867 --> 00:01:17,984
♪ In my direction will do ♪
20
00:01:18,078 --> 00:01:19,694
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh... You'll ♪
21
00:01:19,788 --> 00:01:22,747
♪ Just love my embraces ♪
22
00:01:22,833 --> 00:01:26,702
♪ 'Cause they'll fit like a glove ♪
23
00:01:26,795 --> 00:01:33,463
♪ We'll be off to the races maybe ♪
24
00:01:33,552 --> 00:01:36,841
♪ Kiss me, baby ♪
25
00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:41,633
♪ Let's make love ♪♪
26
00:01:41,727 --> 00:01:43,764
Don't just lay there.
27
00:01:43,854 --> 00:01:45,811
Honey, do something.
28
00:01:50,402 --> 00:01:53,236
One of the great
fortunes of the world began here...
29
00:01:53,322 --> 00:01:57,316
on the outskirts of Tours
in 17th-century France.
30
00:01:57,409 --> 00:02:01,323
Jean-Marc Clement was a farmer,
but not a verygood one.
31
00:02:01,413 --> 00:02:04,997
Contemporaries state that with fertile
land and plenty of water,
32
00:02:05,083 --> 00:02:08,417
he couldn't grow mud,
but he didn't have to.
33
00:02:08,503 --> 00:02:11,587
While hoeing for potatoes,
he found a chest of gold.
34
00:02:11,673 --> 00:02:15,758
This is thought to be the origin of the
phrase, "Lots of potatoes."
35
00:02:15,844 --> 00:02:19,463
From then on, Jean-Marc farmed money.
36
00:02:19,556 --> 00:02:22,264
In Paris, the second Jean-Marc
was the kind of man...
37
00:02:22,351 --> 00:02:25,059
who could form a syndicate
in an empty room.
38
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:27,432
Balloons were the rage of France.
39
00:02:27,522 --> 00:02:31,186
Jean-Marc bought
a balloon factory and prospered.
40
00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:33,768
He was a completely dedicated man,
41
00:02:33,862 --> 00:02:37,481
interested in balloons of every kind.
42
00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:40,032
He died in 1777,
43
00:02:40,118 --> 00:02:42,986
leaving well over 300, 000 francs.
44
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:47,199
The cause of death was listed
as "excessive interest in balloons."
45
00:02:47,292 --> 00:02:51,787
The third Jean-Marc Clement
just happened to own a cannon factory.
46
00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:54,372
He supplied munitions for the French army.
47
00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:58,301
He was so fair-minded, people
say he supplied the enemy also.
48
00:02:58,387 --> 00:03:00,344
His interests grew and grew...
49
00:03:00,430 --> 00:03:03,468
until the day
the munitions factory blew up.
50
00:03:03,558 --> 00:03:07,848
Unfortunately, it was one of the few
mornings Jean-Marc reported to work.
51
00:03:07,938 --> 00:03:11,898
He left millions, and was the first
Clement to die vertically.
52
00:03:11,983 --> 00:03:16,148
The fourth Clement carried on
the basic traditions of the family,
53
00:03:16,238 --> 00:03:18,446
which is to say a prudent marriage...
54
00:03:18,532 --> 00:03:21,821
plus the lively interest in balloons.
55
00:03:21,910 --> 00:03:24,197
This lively interest led to a duel.
56
00:03:24,287 --> 00:03:26,995
The result was officially listed as a tie.
57
00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:32,043
But Jean-Marc took
a short sabbatical in New York.
58
00:03:32,129 --> 00:03:35,839
While there, he picked up
800 acres of property.
59
00:03:35,924 --> 00:03:39,258
It was in the low-rent district,
then known as Wall Street.
60
00:03:39,344 --> 00:03:42,678
He returned to the gay life of Paris
and threw his life away.
61
00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:47,930
His indiscretions with rich widows brought
in less than a million francs a year.
62
00:03:48,019 --> 00:03:50,386
The fifth Clement was a man
who went first class.
63
00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:52,767
He liked railroads...
64
00:03:52,858 --> 00:03:55,771
by 1855, he owned 43 of them...
65
00:03:55,861 --> 00:03:57,978
and steamships.
66
00:03:58,071 --> 00:04:00,814
He owned a total of 19 different lines.
67
00:04:00,907 --> 00:04:03,365
His dash forpower ended the next year...
68
00:04:03,452 --> 00:04:07,321
when negotiations for the purchase of
the Atlantic Ocean broke down.
69
00:04:07,414 --> 00:04:10,202
The sixth Clement was pure patriot.
70
00:04:10,292 --> 00:04:12,375
He pioneered the Statue of Liberty...
71
00:04:12,461 --> 00:04:16,455
and talked a Mr. Eiffel into building some
sort of sightseeing tower.
72
00:04:16,548 --> 00:04:19,416
At the time, Jean-Marc controlled
all the steel in France.
73
00:04:19,509 --> 00:04:23,002
He died in 1890, leaving 400 millions.
74
00:04:23,096 --> 00:04:25,258
His son immediately set out to make money.
75
00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:28,716
He ran across a man
who had some old blueprints in the attic.
76
00:04:28,810 --> 00:04:33,054
The basic patent rights on this notion
brought a good, steady income,
77
00:04:33,148 --> 00:04:36,858
more than enough to cover his losses
on horses and women,
78
00:04:36,943 --> 00:04:40,687
most of whom were quartered
on a yacht called The Harem.
79
00:04:40,781 --> 00:04:45,572
And, of course, there was the old family
devotion to sightseeing towers.
80
00:04:45,660 --> 00:04:49,028
Jean-Marc put up 700 of them
near Waco, Texas.
81
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:51,830
He died mysteriously at the age of 91...
82
00:04:51,917 --> 00:04:54,910
aboard a yacht, Harem III.
83
00:04:55,003 --> 00:04:57,120
After the usual deductions were made,
84
00:04:57,214 --> 00:04:59,752
he left a fortune estimated
on the foreign exchange mart...
85
00:04:59,841 --> 00:05:03,835
as one billion dollars.
86
00:05:03,929 --> 00:05:07,718
As a guide to those in the audience who
may not have a billion dollars,
87
00:05:07,808 --> 00:05:12,018
let it be stated that the interest on the
interest on a billion dollars...
88
00:05:12,103 --> 00:05:15,938
is $70, 000 a week.
89
00:05:16,024 --> 00:05:20,439
This is the New York office
of the worldwide Clement Enterprises.
90
00:05:20,529 --> 00:05:26,025
The current Jean-Marc Clement seems to
embody all the traits of his forebears...
91
00:05:26,117 --> 00:05:28,700
good traits and, cynics point out,
92
00:05:28,787 --> 00:05:31,495
perhaps a few bad ones.
93
00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:37,626
I also like the one I heard
in Paris yesterday...
94
00:05:37,712 --> 00:05:40,705
about a man who taught
his dog to play poker.
95
00:05:40,799 --> 00:05:43,007
But the poor dog was a terrible gambler,
96
00:05:43,093 --> 00:05:46,086
because every time he got a good hand,
97
00:05:46,179 --> 00:05:48,466
he'd wag his tail.
98
00:05:48,557 --> 00:05:50,469
- That's funny.
- That's marvelous.
99
00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:56,429
- Good-bye.
- Bye.
100
00:06:01,444 --> 00:06:03,310
Great storyteller.
101
00:06:03,405 --> 00:06:06,819
- And the way he tells a story...
- Certainly not dull.
102
00:06:06,908 --> 00:06:08,820
I agree with you.
103
00:06:08,910 --> 00:06:12,620
Hi. I'm Coffman
from Public Relations downstairs.
104
00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:15,289
Oh, yes.
The gentlemen with the emergency.
105
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:17,367
Mr. Wales expects you.
106
00:06:21,631 --> 00:06:23,122
Thank you.
107
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:37,057
What emergency concerns Mr. Clement?
108
00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:40,936
It's this item in the newspaper, sir.
I thought you might like to see this.
109
00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:43,643
I read no item in this morning's newspaper
concerning Mr. Clement.
110
00:06:43,737 --> 00:06:45,694
This isn't a regular newspaper, Mr. Wales.
111
00:06:45,780 --> 00:06:48,397
This is Variety, the theatrical paper.
112
00:06:48,491 --> 00:06:51,529
How could anything theatrical
concern Mr. Clement?
113
00:06:51,620 --> 00:06:53,782
Would you read that, please, sir?
114
00:07:00,962 --> 00:07:02,919
- Come with me.
- Right.
115
00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:17,180
Good morning, George. Feast your eyes.
116
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:19,557
What, more? How much?
117
00:07:19,648 --> 00:07:22,732
- You don't measure art by money.
- I do.
118
00:07:22,817 --> 00:07:24,809
Good heavens.
This is the Meister collection...
119
00:07:24,903 --> 00:07:26,895
that the Louvre and the National Gallery
were bidding for.
120
00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:30,572
- You outbid two governments?
- Oh, it was a pleasure.
121
00:07:30,659 --> 00:07:33,572
The Renoir, I will hang
in the Paris apartment.
122
00:07:33,662 --> 00:07:37,372
The Matisse, I think
in the Hong Kong office.
123
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,494
And the van Gogh...
124
00:07:39,584 --> 00:07:42,952
Oh, I think it will
be perfect on the yacht.
125
00:07:43,046 --> 00:07:44,457
- How do you do?
- I beg your pardon.
126
00:07:44,547 --> 00:07:45,958
This is Alexander Hoffman.
127
00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:48,291
Coffman.
Public Relations. Ours.
128
00:07:48,385 --> 00:07:49,546
How do you do, sir?
129
00:07:49,636 --> 00:07:51,093
Jean-Marc.
130
00:07:53,390 --> 00:07:54,881
- It's something serious.
- Hmm.
131
00:07:54,975 --> 00:07:56,261
I can tell
by the breathing.
132
00:07:56,351 --> 00:07:59,594
Somebody's putting on a show,
and you're going to be portrayed in it.
133
00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:02,021
Really?
I couldn't be more flattered.
134
00:08:02,107 --> 00:08:03,097
Listen to this.
135
00:08:03,191 --> 00:08:07,276
"Greenwich Village Revue to Caricature
Celebrities in the Theateround.
136
00:08:07,362 --> 00:08:10,355
Some of the public figures
up for laughs are Maria Callas,
137
00:08:10,448 --> 00:08:15,159
Elvis Presley, Van Cliburn
and Jean-Marc Clement, amongst others."
138
00:08:15,245 --> 00:08:16,986
You're going
to be made ridiculous.
139
00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:18,446
Oh!
140
00:08:18,540 --> 00:08:20,532
Do you mind if Coffman
leaves us for a moment?
141
00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:21,911
Of course not, George.
142
00:08:22,002 --> 00:08:23,118
Yes. Coffman.
143
00:08:23,211 --> 00:08:26,295
No, no, no.
You'd better go in there. Thanks.
144
00:08:26,381 --> 00:08:29,795
I've known for a long time that something
like this is bound to happen.
145
00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:33,298
All those women you take out in public,
this is the result.
146
00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:35,926
I'm not anxious to take them out
in public, George.
147
00:08:36,016 --> 00:08:37,973
They won't stay indoors.
148
00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:43,100
Jean-Marc, your father's no longer here
to uphold the dignity of your name.
149
00:08:43,189 --> 00:08:45,681
Now then, I've put on this young man...
150
00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:49,109
to do nothing but keep your name
out of the newspapers.
151
00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:50,936
I want you to take him seriously.
152
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:53,114
I want you to start at once.
153
00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:56,738
Very well, George.
And try not to worry so much about me.
154
00:08:56,828 --> 00:09:00,447
Oh, I've been worrying about you since
your christening at Notre Dame.
155
00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:03,078
I wouldn't mind a little change at all.
156
00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:04,534
- Coffman!
- Yes, sir?
157
00:09:04,627 --> 00:09:07,119
What are you being paid for?
You call this good public relations?
158
00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:09,546
- No, sir, I do not.
- Well, I want it stopped, you understand?
159
00:09:09,632 --> 00:09:11,373
It's an invasion of privacy.
160
00:09:11,468 --> 00:09:13,801
If you can't stop it, I will.
161
00:09:13,887 --> 00:09:15,799
Is that correct, Jean-Marc?
162
00:09:15,889 --> 00:09:17,551
- Absolutely.
- Thank you.
163
00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:19,051
Run along.
164
00:09:20,685 --> 00:09:22,301
- Good-bye, sir.
- Good-bye, Coffman.
165
00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:24,512
I'll get on this right away.
166
00:09:24,606 --> 00:09:27,144
"By reason that they
should dissolve their partnership...
167
00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:28,940
and to maintain the..."
168
00:09:29,027 --> 00:09:31,314
You may use the private elevator.
169
00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:32,861
"By arrangement they have con..."
170
00:09:32,947 --> 00:09:34,609
There. There.
171
00:09:34,699 --> 00:09:37,737
"Now, therefore, it is agreed
to end this legally by the two parties"...
172
00:09:52,008 --> 00:09:54,045
- Mr. Coffman?
- Yes.
173
00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:57,469
You'll please return
to Mr. Clement's office.
174
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:08,931
Yes, sir?
175
00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:12,102
Beautiful, isn't it?
176
00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:15,563
Oh, yes. Mm-hmm. Very.
177
00:10:16,658 --> 00:10:18,615
Coffman, I'm not
especially thin-skinned...
178
00:10:18,701 --> 00:10:21,990
about some jokes that might be made
about me on the stage.
179
00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:27,200
But if it's too embarrassing about girls,
that can be serious.
180
00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:29,285
Sit down.
181
00:10:32,006 --> 00:10:34,248
Will it help if I got the show closed up?
182
00:10:34,342 --> 00:10:38,882
Well, sir, then you run the danger of
getting more bad publicity...
183
00:10:38,972 --> 00:10:41,555
if you do something like that.
184
00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:43,724
Yes, that's possible.
185
00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:45,893
It's a very small theater, isn't it?
186
00:10:45,979 --> 00:10:48,892
Not many people would really see
an off-Broadway show.
187
00:10:48,982 --> 00:10:50,314
Well, if they're successful,
188
00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:54,269
people like Ed Sullivan often
use parts of them on television.
189
00:10:54,362 --> 00:10:59,153
Life, Look, Paris Match even,
might pick it up.
190
00:10:59,242 --> 00:11:01,700
Especially since they're using your name.
191
00:11:01,786 --> 00:11:03,743
Mm-hmm.
192
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:06,117
I may be more thin-skinned than I suspect.
193
00:11:06,207 --> 00:11:08,199
I don't seem to relish being laughed at.
194
00:11:09,377 --> 00:11:10,834
Um...
195
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,663
Go on.
You've thought of something. Say it.
196
00:11:13,756 --> 00:11:16,749
Well, I don't know if you...
if you'd care for this,
197
00:11:16,843 --> 00:11:21,258
but, um, would you consider
attending a rehearsal of the show, sir?
198
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:23,259
Why? What would that accomplish?
199
00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:26,683
It would take the sting out of anything
they're doing. It would be disarming.
200
00:11:26,769 --> 00:11:30,137
If you show them that you have a sense of
humor and that you can laugh at yourself,
201
00:11:30,231 --> 00:11:33,065
then all the rest
of the laughter is good-natured.
202
00:11:33,151 --> 00:11:35,143
That's my opinion.
203
00:11:35,236 --> 00:11:37,319
Would they think it odd for me
to attend a rehearsal?
204
00:11:37,405 --> 00:11:38,987
It's perfectly natural.
205
00:11:39,073 --> 00:11:41,110
You've read that you're
being depicted in the show,
206
00:11:41,201 --> 00:11:44,160
and you've come down
to see what you're like.
207
00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:46,157
They'd only be flattered.
208
00:11:46,247 --> 00:11:49,411
I've been a press agent in the theater,
Mr. Clement. I know I'm right.
209
00:11:52,921 --> 00:11:54,002
Let's go.
210
00:11:54,088 --> 00:11:55,499
Now?
211
00:11:55,590 --> 00:11:57,001
They're rehearsing,
aren't they?
212
00:11:57,091 --> 00:11:58,548
Yes, sir.
213
00:11:58,635 --> 00:12:02,424
Time is money,
and I don't like to waste either.
214
00:12:03,306 --> 00:12:04,797
Hmm?
215
00:12:06,351 --> 00:12:07,842
Come on.
216
00:12:35,797 --> 00:12:37,880
- Is this a theater?
- Theater-in-the-round, sir.
217
00:12:37,966 --> 00:12:39,377
It's very informal.
218
00:12:39,467 --> 00:12:40,958
Excuse me.
219
00:12:41,761 --> 00:12:43,878
This is the stage door.
220
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:03,989
Joe, these light cues
are sure tricky.
221
00:13:04,075 --> 00:13:06,317
We gotta hit 'em just right.
222
00:13:08,788 --> 00:13:10,620
Hit the blue.
223
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:36,722
Boys!
224
00:13:52,707 --> 00:13:55,575
My name is... Lolita.
225
00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:58,960
And, uh,
226
00:13:59,047 --> 00:14:01,039
I'm not supposed to...
227
00:14:03,134 --> 00:14:04,670
play...
228
00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:08,170
with boys.
229
00:14:11,559 --> 00:14:15,348
Moi!
230
00:14:15,438 --> 00:14:16,929
Uh-uh!
231
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:20,398
Mon coeur est à Papa.
232
00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:24,102
You know.
233
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:26,063
Le propriétaire.
234
00:14:44,592 --> 00:14:46,083
No!
235
00:14:49,806 --> 00:14:52,514
♪ While tearing off ♪
236
00:14:52,600 --> 00:14:54,717
♪ A game of golf ♪
237
00:14:54,811 --> 00:14:59,272
♪ I may make a play
for the caddie ♪
238
00:14:59,357 --> 00:15:01,815
♪ But when I do ♪
239
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,767
♪ I don't follow through ♪
240
00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:05,523
♪ 'Cause my heart ♪
241
00:15:05,613 --> 00:15:07,855
♪ Belongs to Daddy ♪
242
00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:11,192
♪ If I invite ♪
243
00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:13,777
♪ A boy some night ♪
244
00:15:13,871 --> 00:15:18,536
♪ To dine on my fine
finnan haddie ♪
245
00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:20,993
♪ I just adore ♪
246
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:22,794
♪ His asking for more ♪
247
00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:23,961
♪ But ♪
248
00:15:24,048 --> 00:15:27,462
♪ My heart belongs to Daddy ♪
249
00:15:27,552 --> 00:15:32,422
♪ Yes, my heart
belongs to Daddy ♪
250
00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:34,757
♪ So I simply ♪
251
00:15:34,851 --> 00:15:36,934
♪ Couldn't be bad ♪
252
00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:42,139
♪ Yes, my heart
belongs to Daddy ♪
253
00:15:42,233 --> 00:15:46,728
♪ Da, da, da, da
da, da, da, da ♪
254
00:15:46,821 --> 00:15:51,691
♪ So I want
to warn you, laddie ♪
255
00:15:51,784 --> 00:15:56,575
♪ Though I know
that you're perfectly swell ♪
256
00:15:56,664 --> 00:16:01,329
♪ That my heart
belongs to Daddy ♪
257
00:16:02,253 --> 00:16:04,666
♪ 'Cause my Daddy ♪
258
00:16:07,008 --> 00:16:09,591
♪ He treats it ♪
259
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,503
♪ So ♪
260
00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:41,372
♪ While tearing off ♪
261
00:16:41,459 --> 00:16:43,121
♪ A game of golf ♪
262
00:16:43,211 --> 00:16:46,579
♪ I may make a play
for the caddie ♪
263
00:16:46,672 --> 00:16:48,709
♪ But when I do ♪
264
00:16:48,799 --> 00:16:50,756
♪ I don't follow through ♪
265
00:16:52,386 --> 00:16:54,469
♪ Ooh, Daddy ♪
266
00:16:54,555 --> 00:16:58,094
♪ If I invite
a boy some night ♪
267
00:16:58,184 --> 00:17:01,473
♪ To cook up
a fine enchilada ♪
268
00:17:01,562 --> 00:17:05,647
♪ Though Spanish rice
is all very nice ♪
269
00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:08,646
♪ Ba-da, ba-da, ba-da
ba-da, ba-da, da-da ♪
270
00:17:08,736 --> 00:17:09,817
Yes!
271
00:17:09,904 --> 00:17:12,897
♪ My heart belongs
to my daddy ♪
272
00:17:12,990 --> 00:17:14,777
♪ So I simply ♪
273
00:17:16,744 --> 00:17:18,155
♪ Couldn't be bad ♪
274
00:17:18,246 --> 00:17:22,081
♪ Yes, my heart
belongs to my daddy ♪
275
00:17:22,166 --> 00:17:25,000
♪ Da, da, da, da, da, da
da, da, da ♪
276
00:17:26,504 --> 00:17:30,669
♪ So I want
to warn you, laddie ♪
277
00:17:30,758 --> 00:17:34,718
♪ Though I know
you're perfectly swell ♪
278
00:17:34,804 --> 00:17:39,299
♪ That my heart
belongs to my daddy ♪
279
00:17:39,392 --> 00:17:41,975
♪ 'Cause Daddy ♪
280
00:17:43,104 --> 00:17:45,596
♪ My daddy ♪
281
00:17:46,691 --> 00:17:48,648
♪ My little old daddy ♪
282
00:17:48,734 --> 00:17:51,147
♪ He treats it so ♪
283
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:06,033
♪ That little old man
He just treats it so good ♪♪
284
00:18:19,974 --> 00:18:21,715
Lights! All right, kids!
285
00:18:21,809 --> 00:18:24,597
All right, kids, up you get!
Terrific! Really good.
286
00:18:24,687 --> 00:18:26,474
Up you get!
287
00:18:33,154 --> 00:18:35,146
All you people trying out
as doubles, on stage.
288
00:18:35,239 --> 00:18:37,447
Elvis Presleys, Van Cliburns,
289
00:18:37,533 --> 00:18:40,742
Maria Callases,
Jean-Marc Clements, step up.
290
00:18:40,828 --> 00:18:42,569
Maria Callases, over here.
291
00:18:43,664 --> 00:18:46,623
Jean-Marc Clements, Elvis Presleys...
292
00:18:46,709 --> 00:18:48,701
Coffman.
293
00:18:48,794 --> 00:18:50,706
Yes, sir?
294
00:18:50,796 --> 00:18:52,788
Ask her to dinner.
295
00:18:52,882 --> 00:18:54,339
Dinner?
296
00:18:54,425 --> 00:18:56,917
Bring her to my place, 8:00.
297
00:19:00,973 --> 00:19:03,932
You're trying out for Clement, aren't you?
298
00:19:04,018 --> 00:19:06,135
Hey, that's very good.
Just what you're doing.
299
00:19:06,228 --> 00:19:08,971
- That's just his stupid look.
- Say, now. Now, now...
300
00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:11,148
You don't look like anybody.
You might as well go home.
301
00:19:11,233 --> 00:19:14,817
Come on onstage, fella. You got something.
302
00:19:14,904 --> 00:19:16,941
Come on, Presleys.
How about it? Let's go.
303
00:19:17,031 --> 00:19:20,900
Sort of form groups in three. And you
girls... Maria Callases. Yeah.
304
00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:23,076
- Hey, Coffman.
- Hello.
305
00:19:23,162 --> 00:19:25,279
- Miller.
- Yeah. What are you doing down here?
306
00:19:25,373 --> 00:19:27,956
You Broadway big shots
aren't allowed below 14th Street.
307
00:19:28,042 --> 00:19:29,499
I'm not on Broadway anymore.
308
00:19:29,585 --> 00:19:31,497
I moved into, um,
309
00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:34,455
industrial public relations.
310
00:19:34,548 --> 00:19:37,586
Clements, please.
You guys all get together.
311
00:19:37,677 --> 00:19:39,794
That's it. Move in.
312
00:19:39,887 --> 00:19:42,425
All right. Yeah. Uh-huh.
313
00:19:42,515 --> 00:19:44,131
Now Presleys. Hit it, Elvis.
314
00:19:44,225 --> 00:19:47,468
♪ Well, keep on rock and roll, Mama
We're rockin' all the time ♪
315
00:19:47,561 --> 00:19:49,268
- ♪ She can be... ♪
- Thank you.
316
00:19:49,355 --> 00:19:51,472
- ♪ See that chick with the red dress on ♪
- Thank you.
317
00:19:51,565 --> 00:19:54,774
♪ Well, I love her eyes
I love her lips ♪
318
00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:57,477
♪ They taste even better
than potato chips ♪
319
00:19:57,571 --> 00:19:58,778
♪ Ooh-wee, baby ♪
320
00:20:01,242 --> 00:20:02,653
That's enough.
321
00:20:02,743 --> 00:20:05,110
Excuse me. I am Jean-Marc Clement.
322
00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,696
- I wonder if I...
- Say something else.
323
00:20:07,790 --> 00:20:09,326
Go ahead.
324
00:20:09,417 --> 00:20:11,283
I beg your pardon, sir.
I'm afraid you are mis...
325
00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:12,493
Listen to him.
326
00:20:12,586 --> 00:20:13,872
It's amazing.
327
00:20:13,963 --> 00:20:17,297
I saw Clement in a newsreel.
Hey, you really got him down.
328
00:20:17,383 --> 00:20:19,921
Come over here. I want to see something.
329
00:20:20,010 --> 00:20:22,969
I want you to stand next to this man here.
330
00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:25,638
That's it. No, you go in the middle.
331
00:20:25,725 --> 00:20:29,264
Like... Like that.
That's right. That's not bad, hey?
332
00:20:29,353 --> 00:20:31,345
No doubt about it.
333
00:20:31,439 --> 00:20:32,930
Okay. Take him, Kerry.
334
00:20:33,023 --> 00:20:35,231
You in the middle,
don't go away. You two, dismissed.
335
00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:37,650
Now I want to see the Van Cliburns.
336
00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:49,579
You're really French, aren't you?
337
00:20:49,665 --> 00:20:51,122
Yes.
338
00:20:54,003 --> 00:20:55,460
Very much so.
339
00:20:57,131 --> 00:20:59,714
- Been here long?
- I go back and forth.
340
00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:02,133
My family is rather transatlantic.
341
00:21:02,219 --> 00:21:04,506
That's good for the part.
342
00:21:04,597 --> 00:21:07,465
Hey, they're really
gonna make an idiot out of him.
343
00:21:07,558 --> 00:21:09,470
- Who?
- Clement.
344
00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:12,519
I can't get over the resemblance.
345
00:21:12,605 --> 00:21:14,767
Oh, you're much nicer,
of course.
346
00:21:14,857 --> 00:21:15,973
Thank you.
347
00:21:16,066 --> 00:21:18,023
Why do you think so?
348
00:21:18,110 --> 00:21:20,067
Well, all you ever see him doing...
349
00:21:20,154 --> 00:21:23,818
is getting in and out of sports cars,
some girl suing him again.
350
00:21:23,908 --> 00:21:25,240
You don't like that.
351
00:21:25,326 --> 00:21:26,407
Well, it's all right,
352
00:21:26,494 --> 00:21:29,237
but think of what he could do in this
world with all that money.
353
00:21:29,330 --> 00:21:31,447
Oh, I wish I was taking French...
354
00:21:31,540 --> 00:21:33,532
now that you're going
to be with the company.
355
00:21:33,626 --> 00:21:35,037
I could practice on you.
356
00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:36,368
Oh, you're a college girl?
357
00:21:36,462 --> 00:21:37,748
No. Night school.
358
00:21:37,838 --> 00:21:39,795
I'm getting my high school diploma.
359
00:21:39,882 --> 00:21:42,374
What do you want to do that for?
360
00:21:42,468 --> 00:21:45,677
I got tired of being ignorant. I never
knew what people were referring to.
361
00:21:45,763 --> 00:21:50,053
I suppose you want to play Shakespeare
and Greek tragedy and...
362
00:21:50,142 --> 00:21:54,011
Oh, no. This is my favorite kind of show.
363
00:21:54,104 --> 00:21:56,596
Um, have you been out of work long?
364
00:21:56,690 --> 00:21:59,182
Out of... No, I'm...
365
00:21:59,276 --> 00:22:00,812
I'm sorry. I didn't mean
to get personal.
366
00:22:00,903 --> 00:22:02,769
But I noticed how you acted before,
367
00:22:02,863 --> 00:22:05,025
pretending you didn't want the job.
368
00:22:05,115 --> 00:22:07,949
I figured you were pretty desperate.
369
00:22:08,035 --> 00:22:09,947
You are very observant.
370
00:22:10,037 --> 00:22:11,699
I am, uh...
371
00:22:14,416 --> 00:22:15,657
What are you knitting?
372
00:22:15,751 --> 00:22:17,287
I haven't decided yet.
373
00:22:17,378 --> 00:22:19,290
It keeps my hands busy.
374
00:22:20,381 --> 00:22:22,998
Hey, fella.
I have to have your Equity card.
375
00:22:23,092 --> 00:22:24,424
My what?
376
00:22:24,510 --> 00:22:26,217
Oh, you don't have
to join Actors' Equity.
377
00:22:26,303 --> 00:22:27,919
They could list you
as a nonprofessional.
378
00:22:28,013 --> 00:22:30,471
- Fine.
- Why don't you do that, Jimmy?
379
00:22:30,558 --> 00:22:32,595
All right, what's your name?
380
00:22:32,685 --> 00:22:34,722
My name is Jean...
381
00:22:40,776 --> 00:22:42,938
Oddly enough, my name
often startles people.
382
00:22:43,028 --> 00:22:44,610
Why? What is it?
383
00:22:52,496 --> 00:22:53,782
Alexander.
384
00:22:54,999 --> 00:22:57,082
Not Alexander Dumas.
385
00:22:57,167 --> 00:22:58,328
You know Alexander Dumas?
386
00:22:58,419 --> 00:22:59,580
We had him last term.
387
00:22:59,670 --> 00:23:01,127
He wrote The Three Musketeers.
388
00:23:01,213 --> 00:23:02,294
It's a lovely name.
389
00:23:02,381 --> 00:23:03,997
It happens to be my name.
390
00:23:04,091 --> 00:23:06,003
Okay, Al.
391
00:23:06,927 --> 00:23:08,919
Alexander Dumas?
392
00:23:10,264 --> 00:23:11,721
What a small world.
393
00:23:11,807 --> 00:23:14,424
Oh, it's a very common name in France.
394
00:23:15,978 --> 00:23:19,187
I hope you'll help me.
I've never been on a stage before.
395
00:23:19,273 --> 00:23:22,311
I knew. You can always tell an outsider.
396
00:23:22,401 --> 00:23:23,642
How?
397
00:23:23,736 --> 00:23:26,854
Mostly the way they look at girls
in rehearsal clothes.
398
00:23:27,865 --> 00:23:29,777
How do people in show business look?
399
00:23:29,867 --> 00:23:32,484
They don't. A girl
can walk around backstage...
400
00:23:32,578 --> 00:23:34,535
with nothing on except her goodwill,
401
00:23:34,622 --> 00:23:36,534
and nobody will even turn his head.
402
00:23:36,624 --> 00:23:40,584
The same girl, fully dressed, walks down
an aisle of clerks in an office,
403
00:23:40,669 --> 00:23:42,786
pinched black and blue.
404
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:45,213
What's the matter with you people anyway?
405
00:23:45,299 --> 00:23:48,758
I think we are normal.
You're the ones in trouble.
406
00:23:48,844 --> 00:23:52,383
I could give you a tip on how to play
Clement if you're interested.
407
00:23:52,473 --> 00:23:53,964
Oh, yes. I'm here to learn.
408
00:23:54,058 --> 00:23:56,095
Try acting
with more assurance.
409
00:23:56,185 --> 00:23:58,427
By that I mean,
he doesn't have your sensitivity.
410
00:24:00,064 --> 00:24:01,555
Really?
411
00:24:01,649 --> 00:24:04,608
But I've always felt that Clement
is a rather sensitive man.
412
00:24:04,693 --> 00:24:06,104
Of course
I don't really know, but...
413
00:24:06,195 --> 00:24:08,778
Oh, no. I've met those types.
414
00:24:08,864 --> 00:24:11,527
You got to be a lot cruder, you know?
415
00:24:11,617 --> 00:24:14,610
I never heard anybody
call Jean-Marc Clement crude.
416
00:24:14,703 --> 00:24:17,411
For instance, a man like you...
417
00:24:17,498 --> 00:24:21,458
You come over to me.
You're unsure of yourself, yes?
418
00:24:21,543 --> 00:24:23,910
- Well, yes, I suppose...
- I mean, it's normal.
419
00:24:24,004 --> 00:24:25,916
I'm a girl. You wonder whether I like you.
420
00:24:26,006 --> 00:24:29,420
You're a little uncertain.
You even look a little nervous.
421
00:24:29,510 --> 00:24:31,593
I wouldn't say I was nervous.
422
00:24:31,679 --> 00:24:34,422
That's okay. I kind of like that in a man.
423
00:24:34,515 --> 00:24:36,973
But when Jean-Marc Clement
comes up to a girl,
424
00:24:37,059 --> 00:24:40,803
as soon as he tells her his name, he
expects her to drop dead with the honor.
425
00:24:42,231 --> 00:24:44,393
Well, they do.
I mean, I imagine that, uh...
426
00:24:44,483 --> 00:24:45,644
Sure, but why?
427
00:24:45,734 --> 00:24:47,817
Money. Right?
428
00:24:49,279 --> 00:24:52,443
I don't know. I imagine women would
find him rather charming.
429
00:24:52,533 --> 00:24:56,994
Charming. He drops them after two dates,
has five others the same week.
430
00:24:57,079 --> 00:25:01,289
Boy, you haven't had much experience
with women, have you?
431
00:25:01,375 --> 00:25:03,537
Well, I like to think I have, but...
432
00:25:03,627 --> 00:25:06,711
If you want to be
this kind of person you characterize...
433
00:25:06,797 --> 00:25:10,131
Clement is nothing but a rich louse.
Now, keep that in mind.
434
00:25:10,217 --> 00:25:13,335
When you get up on the stage,
first relax...
435
00:25:13,429 --> 00:25:16,638
and keep telling yourself, "I'm a louse.
436
00:25:16,724 --> 00:25:21,014
I'm a louse. I'm a louse." Try.
437
00:25:24,273 --> 00:25:26,390
I'm...
438
00:25:26,483 --> 00:25:28,850
I think you're making
a big mistake, young lady.
439
00:25:28,944 --> 00:25:30,856
That's it. That's very good.
440
00:25:30,946 --> 00:25:31,936
What's very good?
441
00:25:32,031 --> 00:25:33,943
The way you looked down
with "young lady."
442
00:25:34,033 --> 00:25:35,945
You looked like you had $50 million.
443
00:25:36,035 --> 00:25:37,571
I did?
444
00:25:37,661 --> 00:25:39,493
For a second, you looked
like a spoiled brat.
445
00:25:39,580 --> 00:25:42,038
I'm glad to hear you say that.
446
00:25:42,124 --> 00:25:44,241
How about having dinner with me?
447
00:25:44,334 --> 00:25:47,168
You are teaching me so much.
I'd like to learn more.
448
00:25:47,254 --> 00:25:50,213
- Can't. I only have time for a bite
tonight. -00.
449
00:25:50,299 --> 00:25:54,794
♪ Oh, give me a home ♪
450
00:25:54,887 --> 00:25:56,844
- Don't tell me he's drunk.
- If he is, he's fired.
451
00:25:56,930 --> 00:25:58,546
♪ Roam ♪♪
452
00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:00,472
Hello, sweetheart.
453
00:26:04,063 --> 00:26:05,929
Tony Danton.
454
00:26:06,023 --> 00:26:08,060
That's the kiddie.
455
00:26:08,150 --> 00:26:10,016
Tony Danton.
456
00:26:12,112 --> 00:26:14,069
Tony!
457
00:26:15,032 --> 00:26:17,024
Tony? Are you all right?
458
00:26:19,953 --> 00:26:23,697
♪ Love is a many
splintered thing ♪
459
00:26:23,791 --> 00:26:25,373
You meshuggener!
460
00:26:25,459 --> 00:26:26,495
I'm sorry, Mandy.
461
00:26:26,585 --> 00:26:27,746
I was just
putting you on.
462
00:26:28,921 --> 00:26:32,005
Very funny. I just aged 10 years.
463
00:26:32,091 --> 00:26:35,334
Well, that's as funny
as I can get cold sober.
464
00:26:35,427 --> 00:26:37,384
Have you got some sort of a parody?
465
00:26:37,471 --> 00:26:39,713
We need a short one
to cover a costume change.
466
00:26:39,807 --> 00:26:41,799
One of the songwriters
at Lindy's knocked out a good one.
467
00:26:41,892 --> 00:26:43,349
Okay, let's hear it.
468
00:26:46,188 --> 00:26:49,306
Well, this is the "Lament of the...
469
00:26:49,399 --> 00:26:51,311
Pop Singer."
470
00:26:51,401 --> 00:26:53,734
♪ Records with gimmicks ♪
471
00:26:53,821 --> 00:26:57,235
♪ Chipmunks and mimics ♪
472
00:26:57,324 --> 00:27:00,943
♪ That's what
the future spells ♪
473
00:27:01,036 --> 00:27:05,076
♪ I said to my bosses
Look at my losses ♪
474
00:27:05,165 --> 00:27:08,033
♪ Give me a song
that sells ♪
475
00:27:08,127 --> 00:27:09,993
♪ Music is dyin' ♪
476
00:27:10,087 --> 00:27:11,828
♪ Nobody's buyin' ♪
477
00:27:11,922 --> 00:27:15,211
♪ Mule trains or Jezebels ♪
478
00:27:15,300 --> 00:27:19,294
♪ So how can a fella
sing "Dardanella" ♪
479
00:27:19,388 --> 00:27:22,381
♪ Give me a song that sells ♪
480
00:27:22,474 --> 00:27:25,387
♪ Aw, come on
Stop hiding that tune ♪
481
00:27:25,477 --> 00:27:29,016
♪ Don't save all those hits
for Pat Boone ♪
482
00:27:29,106 --> 00:27:32,474
♪ Yeah, gimme
Gimme, gimme, gimme ♪
483
00:27:32,568 --> 00:27:36,278
♪ A song that sells ♪
484
00:27:36,363 --> 00:27:38,446
♪ I've got a father to support ♪
485
00:27:38,532 --> 00:27:40,273
♪ A mother to support ♪
486
00:27:40,367 --> 00:27:44,236
♪ A lazy, loafin' good-for-nothin'
brother to support ♪
487
00:27:44,329 --> 00:27:47,447
♪ Yeah, gimme
Gimme, gimme, gimme ♪
488
00:27:47,541 --> 00:27:53,833
♪ A song that sells ♪♪
489
00:28:01,722 --> 00:28:03,964
That's-a funny,
but how much does the writer want for it?
490
00:28:04,057 --> 00:28:05,047
Seventy-five dollars.
491
00:28:05,142 --> 00:28:06,758
Well, try and pay less.
We'll take it.
492
00:28:06,852 --> 00:28:10,562
Kids, if you come across any other
parodies, jokes or bits, bring 'em around.
493
00:28:10,647 --> 00:28:12,559
We can use three or four
between the scene changes.
494
00:28:12,649 --> 00:28:16,233
Okay, kids, that's all today.
Tomorrow morning, 11:00, on time.
495
00:28:17,529 --> 00:28:19,361
Excuse me.
496
00:28:21,617 --> 00:28:24,280
I have a rather amusing story
you may like.
497
00:28:24,369 --> 00:28:26,361
Let's hear it.
498
00:28:28,081 --> 00:28:32,121
It's, uh, about a man
who taught his dog to play poker.
499
00:28:33,629 --> 00:28:36,497
But the poor dog was a terrible gambler,
500
00:28:36,590 --> 00:28:42,177
because every time he got a good hand...
501
00:28:42,262 --> 00:28:44,629
- He'd wag his tail!
- He'd wag his tail.
502
00:28:44,723 --> 00:28:47,511
Don't let that
discourage you, kids. New jokes.
503
00:28:47,601 --> 00:28:50,514
- Tomorrow morning, 11:00, on time.
- Kill the work lights.
504
00:28:50,604 --> 00:28:51,970
New jokes!
505
00:28:52,064 --> 00:28:55,774
See you tomorrow.
Rehearsal at 11:00 sharp.
506
00:28:59,613 --> 00:29:02,151
They do that to everyone
when they know the joke.
507
00:29:02,241 --> 00:29:03,777
- Don't be discouraged.
- Mandy!
508
00:29:03,867 --> 00:29:05,529
- Thank you.
- Coming?
509
00:29:05,619 --> 00:29:07,827
Coming.
510
00:29:07,913 --> 00:29:10,246
I'll take that. Okay.
511
00:29:11,208 --> 00:29:13,291
- You got everything?
- Yeah.
512
00:29:35,983 --> 00:29:38,817
How would they all have known that joke?
513
00:29:38,902 --> 00:29:42,316
People in show business
know the popular jokes, Mr. Clement.
514
00:29:42,406 --> 00:29:44,648
That's why they buy new ones.
515
00:29:53,542 --> 00:29:56,831
I got the girl's telephone number
from the stage manager.
516
00:29:59,047 --> 00:30:00,959
Sir?
517
00:30:01,049 --> 00:30:03,416
I'll try to have her
at your place by 8:00.
518
00:30:03,510 --> 00:30:05,422
- Hmm?
- I'll try to have the girl...
519
00:30:05,512 --> 00:30:07,970
No, no. She's got geography.
520
00:30:08,056 --> 00:30:11,015
Oh, yes. Oh, yes.
521
00:30:11,101 --> 00:30:14,936
How many hours a day
do these rehearsals usually go on?
522
00:30:15,022 --> 00:30:17,935
All day long, sir.
All night too sometimes.
523
00:30:18,025 --> 00:30:20,267
Well, when do they have time for, uh...
524
00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:22,602
They make time. No, thank you, sir.
525
00:30:22,696 --> 00:30:24,608
Of course there's always Sunday.
526
00:30:24,698 --> 00:30:27,315
Sunday? This is only Tuesday.
527
00:30:27,409 --> 00:30:29,401
Well, perhaps she'd be willing
to skip a class...
528
00:30:29,494 --> 00:30:32,578
if I told her that you
were Jean-Marc Clement, sir.
529
00:30:32,664 --> 00:30:35,031
I'm not so sure.
530
00:30:35,125 --> 00:30:37,742
She doesn't think very highly
of Jean-Marc Clement.
531
00:30:37,836 --> 00:30:40,795
I never ran into that before.
532
00:30:40,881 --> 00:30:42,417
Odd.
533
00:30:44,843 --> 00:30:47,256
I want you
to buy me a joke.
534
00:30:47,346 --> 00:30:48,382
Beg your pardon, sir?
535
00:30:48,472 --> 00:30:52,682
I want an original joke, something superb.
536
00:30:52,768 --> 00:30:57,138
Well, I do know one very good comedy
writer, Charlie Lamont.
537
00:30:57,230 --> 00:30:59,517
- He's rather expensive.
- Good.
538
00:30:59,608 --> 00:31:01,691
Go to the Investors National Bank.
539
00:31:01,777 --> 00:31:04,611
They'll give you a thousand dollars.
540
00:31:04,696 --> 00:31:07,814
Be at my office tomorrow morning
with a new joke.
541
00:31:07,908 --> 00:31:10,491
And be sure it's brand-new.
542
00:31:10,577 --> 00:31:12,534
I never buy anything used.
543
00:31:12,621 --> 00:31:14,783
Excuse me, sir. Just so I'll know.
544
00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:17,490
Are you thinking of joining
the cast of this show?
545
00:31:17,584 --> 00:31:20,497
Oh, for a few hours, perhaps.
546
00:31:20,587 --> 00:31:22,624
There is no other way.
547
00:31:22,714 --> 00:31:24,831
I certainly couldn't wait till Sunday.
548
00:31:31,014 --> 00:31:33,552
Are you sure you can
think in here, Mr. Lamont?
549
00:31:33,642 --> 00:31:36,100
For a thousand bucks,
I can think in a coal mine.
550
00:31:36,186 --> 00:31:39,520
I do my best work here.
At home, I got five kids.
551
00:31:39,606 --> 00:31:41,848
What's the situation, and who is the guy?
552
00:31:41,942 --> 00:31:44,685
A big dress manufacturer.
He's going to make a speech in Miami.
553
00:31:44,778 --> 00:31:47,111
It's got to be definitely a new joke.
554
00:31:47,197 --> 00:31:49,689
New is easy. Funny is hard.
555
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:54,281
Could you hurry it up, please?
556
00:31:54,371 --> 00:31:56,829
I don't know if I'll have
the strength to deliver it to him.
557
00:31:56,915 --> 00:31:59,123
I'm strictly
a ski-and-toboggan man myself.
558
00:31:59,209 --> 00:32:01,121
Now don't go away.
I'm the best.
559
00:32:02,295 --> 00:32:05,288
Even the ghostwriters come to me.
I ghost for the ghost.
560
00:32:05,382 --> 00:32:06,998
Now, let's see.
561
00:32:12,556 --> 00:32:14,718
Oh, I'm so glad you like it, sir.
562
00:32:14,808 --> 00:32:16,720
Quite funny, yes.
563
00:32:16,810 --> 00:32:18,426
Here is Wilson with his report.
564
00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:20,512
- Good morning, Wilson.
- Good morning, sir.
565
00:32:20,605 --> 00:32:22,346
Begin, Wilson.
566
00:32:22,441 --> 00:32:26,060
"Miss Amanda Dell. Dell is her stage name.
Family name Delson.
567
00:32:26,153 --> 00:32:28,236
Non-married,
American citizen by birth.
568
00:32:28,321 --> 00:32:30,734
She has occasion...
569
00:32:30,824 --> 00:32:32,736
She has occasional escorts,
570
00:32:32,826 --> 00:32:35,284
but is mostly seen with Tony Danton,
her costar in her present show."
571
00:32:35,370 --> 00:32:38,579
I never imagined
people made up jokes for money.
572
00:32:38,665 --> 00:32:40,622
But I guess they have
to come from someplace.
573
00:32:40,709 --> 00:32:44,043
Am I to understand you're buying jokes?
574
00:32:44,129 --> 00:32:46,416
Oh, just one, George,
for the rehearsal today.
575
00:32:46,506 --> 00:32:48,748
Proceed, Wilson.
576
00:32:48,842 --> 00:32:50,708
"Miss Dell is meeting
another man in private.
577
00:32:50,802 --> 00:32:52,384
He is not Tony Danton."
578
00:32:52,471 --> 00:32:54,087
Oho! What did I tell you?
579
00:32:54,181 --> 00:32:56,594
"He's evidently married and
avoiding being seen publicly with her.
580
00:32:56,683 --> 00:32:58,640
Their meeting place
is St. Timothy's Church."
581
00:32:58,727 --> 00:32:59,934
Very ingenious.
582
00:33:00,020 --> 00:33:02,307
"Miss Dell enters the church
when the service is almost over,
583
00:33:02,397 --> 00:33:04,514
and the two spend a good deal
of time together."
584
00:33:04,608 --> 00:33:07,601
This time I smell gunplay.
585
00:33:07,694 --> 00:33:09,185
Good day, Wilson.
586
00:33:09,279 --> 00:33:11,316
Shall we continue to keep her
under surveillance?
587
00:33:11,406 --> 00:33:13,398
No. I'll tend
to that myself, thank you.
588
00:33:13,492 --> 00:33:14,528
Good day, sir.
589
00:33:16,995 --> 00:33:18,952
Are you feeling well?
590
00:33:19,039 --> 00:33:20,120
I feel fine.
591
00:33:20,207 --> 00:33:23,245
Just lost a little weight
getting that joke, that's all.
592
00:33:23,335 --> 00:33:24,325
Good day, sir.
593
00:33:24,419 --> 00:33:25,409
Good day, Coffman.
594
00:33:29,132 --> 00:33:31,465
The mail, Miss Manners,
595
00:33:31,551 --> 00:33:34,510
and cancel all my appointments for...
596
00:33:35,847 --> 00:33:37,839
24 hours.
597
00:33:39,351 --> 00:33:42,515
She's meeting another man secretly.
598
00:33:42,604 --> 00:33:44,766
Jean-Marc, you're walking
right into a scandal.
599
00:33:44,856 --> 00:33:48,315
George, you must see her.
600
00:33:48,401 --> 00:33:52,190
She comes down, you see.
Absolutely unbelievable.
601
00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:54,818
Then she comes forward.
602
00:33:54,908 --> 00:33:58,322
What will she do? You don't know.
603
00:33:58,411 --> 00:34:02,325
All of a sudden, "My name is Lolita,
604
00:34:02,415 --> 00:34:06,625
and, uh, I'm not supposed
to play with boys."
605
00:34:14,094 --> 00:34:17,428
I'll speak to San Francisco.
606
00:34:17,514 --> 00:34:20,222
Yes to number two. No to number three.
607
00:34:20,308 --> 00:34:22,265
George, will you take care
of this London business?
608
00:34:22,352 --> 00:34:23,342
Uh-huh.
609
00:34:23,436 --> 00:34:24,643
Anything else?
610
00:34:24,729 --> 00:34:27,597
- I had Cartier send this around.
- Oh, very nice.
611
00:34:27,691 --> 00:34:29,853
For $10,000,
it ought to be nice.
612
00:34:29,943 --> 00:34:32,026
Who is it for? Miss Emerson?
613
00:34:32,112 --> 00:34:34,104
You asked me to pick up something
for Miss Philips.
614
00:34:34,197 --> 00:34:38,032
Of course. Uh, I'll drop it off myself.
615
00:34:38,118 --> 00:34:40,280
Send flowers and a note to Miss Emerson.
616
00:34:40,370 --> 00:34:42,362
I'll do the mail now.
617
00:34:48,670 --> 00:34:50,536
- Good morning.
- Bonjour, monsieur.
618
00:34:50,630 --> 00:34:52,496
To the Cairo office, please.
619
00:34:58,972 --> 00:35:01,385
Please, George. Please.
620
00:35:01,474 --> 00:35:03,386
I hate to see you worry.
621
00:35:03,476 --> 00:35:04,933
I'm much more
than worried.
622
00:35:05,020 --> 00:35:06,477
Oh, don't.
623
00:35:06,563 --> 00:35:07,553
To the Paris office.
624
00:35:07,647 --> 00:35:08,637
Oui, monsieur.
625
00:35:15,697 --> 00:35:18,531
Tell Captain Swanson
I want the yacht ready.
626
00:35:18,617 --> 00:35:20,700
There will be one guest.
627
00:35:20,785 --> 00:35:24,950
Jean-Marc, I have some
important business to see to.
628
00:35:27,667 --> 00:35:29,659
Miss Manners.
629
00:35:29,753 --> 00:35:34,088
Miss Manners, I want you
to buy me a pair of old trousers.
630
00:35:34,174 --> 00:35:36,416
Old trousers?
631
00:35:36,509 --> 00:35:38,341
Yes.
632
00:35:38,428 --> 00:35:40,920
- To the Berlin office.
- Jawohl, mein herr.
633
00:35:43,767 --> 00:35:46,350
And an old jacket too. And a sweater.
634
00:35:46,436 --> 00:35:48,428
Uh, something an actor might wear.
635
00:35:48,521 --> 00:35:52,606
And tell Captain Swanson to have plenty of
paper and pencils on board.
636
00:35:52,692 --> 00:35:55,309
She might want to do some homework.
637
00:36:18,176 --> 00:36:19,792
What do you say, Al?
638
00:36:31,690 --> 00:36:32,897
Hello.
639
00:36:32,982 --> 00:36:34,348
Hi!
640
00:36:36,152 --> 00:36:38,144
Oh, you didn't get any sleep last night.
641
00:36:38,238 --> 00:36:40,821
I couldn't sleep.
That new song kept me awake.
642
00:36:40,907 --> 00:36:42,648
- Oh, hi.
- Hi.
643
00:36:42,742 --> 00:36:44,449
You look tired.
644
00:36:46,246 --> 00:36:48,238
♪ Hey, you ♪
645
00:36:48,331 --> 00:36:50,664
♪ With the crazy eyes ♪
646
00:36:50,750 --> 00:36:52,662
♪ When you turn them on ♪
647
00:36:52,752 --> 00:36:56,120
♪ I'm gone
right up to the skies ♪
648
00:36:56,214 --> 00:36:58,831
♪ Hey, you ♪
649
00:36:58,925 --> 00:37:01,633
♪ With the glowing
glimmers ♪
650
00:37:01,720 --> 00:37:04,838
♪ Do they come
with dimmers ♪
651
00:37:04,931 --> 00:37:06,342
♪ Tonight ♪
652
00:37:06,433 --> 00:37:09,801
♪ They're as bright
as lightning, you ♪
653
00:37:09,894 --> 00:37:12,352
♪ With the crazy lips ♪
654
00:37:12,439 --> 00:37:15,182
♪ When we start to kiss
like this ♪
655
00:37:15,275 --> 00:37:18,188
♪ My heart simply flips ♪
656
00:37:18,278 --> 00:37:20,520
♪ Guess I ♪
657
00:37:20,613 --> 00:37:23,230
♪ Might as well propose ♪
658
00:37:23,324 --> 00:37:28,490
♪ 'Cause heaven knows
I'm in love with those crazy eyes ♪
659
00:37:29,789 --> 00:37:31,451
♪ You, you, you ♪
660
00:37:31,541 --> 00:37:33,828
♪ With the crazy lips ♪
661
00:37:33,918 --> 00:37:36,706
♪ When we start to kiss like this ♪
662
00:37:36,796 --> 00:37:39,755
♪ My heart simply flips ♪
663
00:37:39,841 --> 00:37:42,083
♪ Guess I ♪
664
00:37:42,177 --> 00:37:44,840
♪ Might as well propose ♪
665
00:37:44,929 --> 00:37:50,470
♪ 'Cause heaven knows
I'm in love with those crazy eyes ♪
666
00:37:50,560 --> 00:37:53,223
♪ Knocked-out eyes ♪
667
00:37:53,313 --> 00:37:56,021
♪ Kooky eyes ♪
668
00:37:56,107 --> 00:37:59,726
♪ Fractured eyes ♪
669
00:37:59,819 --> 00:38:04,689
♪ Crazy eyes ♪♪
670
00:38:04,783 --> 00:38:06,240
Yeah!
671
00:38:06,326 --> 00:38:09,239
Tony, it's marvelous.
672
00:38:09,329 --> 00:38:11,366
You're doing great, Tony.
673
00:38:11,456 --> 00:38:13,038
Okay, let's go. Clear the stage.
674
00:38:16,503 --> 00:38:17,994
How's the geography?
675
00:38:18,087 --> 00:38:20,500
Oh! Heartbreaking.
676
00:38:20,590 --> 00:38:22,923
Did you know there's
four million people in Haiti,
677
00:38:23,009 --> 00:38:25,752
and the average wage is $25 a year?
678
00:38:25,845 --> 00:38:29,589
Imagine. I mean,
two tens and a five for a whole year.
679
00:38:29,682 --> 00:38:33,096
Oh. You, uh...
680
00:38:33,186 --> 00:38:35,223
You have relatives in Haiti or something?
681
00:38:35,313 --> 00:38:37,930
No. I just found about it, but...
682
00:38:38,024 --> 00:38:41,358
Well... Well, why don't
they do something about it?
683
00:38:43,530 --> 00:38:45,738
Why are you smiling?
684
00:38:45,824 --> 00:38:47,986
I just don't know what else to do.
685
00:38:48,076 --> 00:38:50,363
I-I'm smiling because I'm...
686
00:38:51,412 --> 00:38:52,653
Oh.
687
00:38:53,623 --> 00:38:55,956
Four-Square Pawnshop.
688
00:38:56,042 --> 00:38:57,158
Ouch.
689
00:38:57,252 --> 00:38:59,369
Don't be embarrassed.
690
00:38:59,462 --> 00:39:02,079
- Well...
- No false pride. Come on now.
691
00:39:02,173 --> 00:39:03,664
Chin up.
692
00:39:04,843 --> 00:39:06,960
Oh, I wonder if you
would have a little time...
693
00:39:07,053 --> 00:39:09,636
to give me some acting pointers.
694
00:39:09,722 --> 00:39:12,135
I know you could really help me.
695
00:39:12,225 --> 00:39:14,592
Couldn't we have a little dinner tonight?
696
00:39:14,686 --> 00:39:17,144
Oh, I can't tonight because
I've got a history exam tomorrow.
697
00:39:17,230 --> 00:39:20,223
I gotta study. I'm very weak in history.
698
00:39:20,316 --> 00:39:22,899
History happens to be
one of my strong points.
699
00:39:22,986 --> 00:39:24,978
I help you with your history,
700
00:39:25,071 --> 00:39:27,233
and you help me with my acting.
701
00:39:27,323 --> 00:39:29,656
But first, we'll have
a quiet little dinner and...
702
00:39:29,742 --> 00:39:32,485
New is easy. Funny is hard.
But remember, I'm not promising anything.
703
00:39:32,579 --> 00:39:34,366
Golly, Charlie, do me a favor.
704
00:39:34,455 --> 00:39:36,742
The show needs jokes, Charlie.
I just want you to listen.
705
00:39:36,833 --> 00:39:38,995
If you think of something good,
do me a favor.
706
00:39:39,085 --> 00:39:41,168
The show needs jokes, Charlie.
I'd appreciate it.
707
00:39:41,254 --> 00:39:43,997
Like I said, I'll take a look.
708
00:39:44,090 --> 00:39:46,127
All right! Hold it!
709
00:39:46,217 --> 00:39:48,960
Let's take it from the opening
for Mr. Lamont.
710
00:39:52,974 --> 00:39:55,842
Mr. Burton. Oh, Mr. Burton.
711
00:39:55,935 --> 00:39:57,847
I'd like to offer another joke.
712
00:39:57,937 --> 00:40:00,429
Well, let it wait until after
rehearsal. Mr. Lamont is a busy man.
713
00:40:00,523 --> 00:40:02,731
I promise you never heard this one.
714
00:40:02,817 --> 00:40:04,729
Okay, but make it snappy.
715
00:40:04,819 --> 00:40:06,936
All right, clear the stage.
716
00:40:12,243 --> 00:40:14,451
A man went to a psychiatrist.
717
00:40:14,537 --> 00:40:17,325
Over each ear he had a piece of bacon,
718
00:40:17,415 --> 00:40:21,955
and around his neck,
an eight-foot snake for a necktie.
719
00:40:22,045 --> 00:40:26,756
And he had a large television antenna
strapped to his head.
720
00:40:26,841 --> 00:40:29,208
"Doctor," he said,
721
00:40:29,302 --> 00:40:31,885
"I want to talk to you about my brother."
722
00:40:31,971 --> 00:40:34,964
Not bad.
723
00:40:35,058 --> 00:40:37,141
- I never heard it.
- But I did!
724
00:40:37,226 --> 00:40:39,218
You dirty crook.
725
00:40:39,312 --> 00:40:43,022
Oh, let me get my hands on him.
I'll break...
726
00:40:43,107 --> 00:40:44,848
- Mr. Lamont, take it easy.
- What's the problem?
727
00:40:44,943 --> 00:40:47,560
That crook stole a joke that
I wrote yesterday for $1,000.
728
00:40:47,654 --> 00:40:50,317
- Thousand dollars?
- For a dress manufacturer in Miami.
729
00:40:50,406 --> 00:40:52,272
I don't double-cross my clients.
730
00:40:52,367 --> 00:40:55,235
I'm suing you for damaging
my professional integrity.
731
00:40:55,328 --> 00:40:57,991
Wait now. We can get to
the bottom of this in no time.
732
00:40:58,081 --> 00:40:59,071
Well, you better.
733
00:40:59,165 --> 00:41:00,747
Where did you
get the joke?
734
00:41:00,833 --> 00:41:01,914
I bought it.
735
00:41:02,001 --> 00:41:03,333
For how much?
736
00:41:04,587 --> 00:41:06,624
- Ten dollars.
- Ten dollars?
737
00:41:07,090 --> 00:41:08,297
From whom?
738
00:41:11,594 --> 00:41:14,758
I'll have to ask you to tell me
from whom you bought this joke,
739
00:41:14,847 --> 00:41:16,179
or you're out of this show.
740
00:41:16,265 --> 00:41:19,008
He couldn't have bought it. I just
wrote it yesterday in a Turkish bath.
741
00:41:19,102 --> 00:41:20,809
He's a liar.
742
00:41:22,188 --> 00:41:24,805
I wouldn't throw that word "liar"
around so easily.
743
00:41:24,899 --> 00:41:26,106
You're a liar.
744
00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:30,728
- He bought the joke. I saw him.
- You saw him?
745
00:41:30,822 --> 00:41:33,690
I had dinner at Lindy's last night,
746
00:41:33,783 --> 00:41:35,740
and, uh, he was sitting in the next booth,
747
00:41:35,827 --> 00:41:38,069
and I heard him buy it from a man.
748
00:41:38,162 --> 00:41:40,154
Someone stole it and stuck him.
It's happened before.
749
00:41:40,248 --> 00:41:42,410
I promise we won't use it.
750
00:41:42,500 --> 00:41:45,493
I'll say you won't use it.
I lost eight pounds on that joke.
751
00:41:45,586 --> 00:41:48,044
Take a break outside, everybody.
752
00:42:11,446 --> 00:42:13,733
I seem to be following you.
753
00:42:14,782 --> 00:42:16,774
Buttermilk, please.
754
00:42:17,368 --> 00:42:18,779
You, Mac?
755
00:42:18,870 --> 00:42:20,361
Coffee. Black.
756
00:42:24,625 --> 00:42:27,959
I want to thank you, Amanda,
for doing that for me.
757
00:42:28,046 --> 00:42:30,038
It's all right. It's nothing.
758
00:42:30,131 --> 00:42:32,088
Oh, I think it was a great deal.
759
00:42:32,175 --> 00:42:34,212
Matter of fact, it's
the most touching thing...
760
00:42:34,302 --> 00:42:36,259
that's happened to me in a long time.
761
00:42:38,389 --> 00:42:39,675
Why did you do it?
762
00:42:39,766 --> 00:42:41,507
Does there have to be a motive?
763
00:42:42,560 --> 00:42:44,552
I rarely see anything done
without a motive.
764
00:42:44,645 --> 00:42:47,183
Almost never, Miss Dell.
765
00:42:47,273 --> 00:42:48,855
Thank you.
766
00:42:48,941 --> 00:42:52,810
I feel sorry for you.
You must have had a sad life.
767
00:42:52,904 --> 00:42:56,068
- What do you do ordinarily?
- Do?
768
00:42:56,157 --> 00:42:59,525
When you're not imitating
Jean-Marc Clement.
769
00:42:59,619 --> 00:43:02,032
You can't make a living doing just that.
770
00:43:02,121 --> 00:43:05,785
I, uh... I represent a French company.
771
00:43:05,875 --> 00:43:07,787
I am a salesman.
772
00:43:07,877 --> 00:43:10,665
I have a sample of my company's product.
773
00:43:12,465 --> 00:43:13,876
Would you care
to look at it?
774
00:43:13,966 --> 00:43:16,754
It's very nice.
775
00:43:16,844 --> 00:43:19,461
It's almost impossible
to tell from the real thing.
776
00:43:19,555 --> 00:43:21,512
Oh, that's because we're indoors.
777
00:43:21,599 --> 00:43:23,511
I've got some earrings like that.
778
00:43:23,601 --> 00:43:26,389
In the outside light, though,
you can tell they're fake.
779
00:43:26,479 --> 00:43:28,471
How much you get for them?
780
00:43:29,273 --> 00:43:30,855
Five dollars.
781
00:43:31,818 --> 00:43:34,561
The box looks like
it's worth more than that.
782
00:43:34,654 --> 00:43:35,690
Yes, it is.
783
00:43:35,780 --> 00:43:38,022
But I wish you'd buy it.
784
00:43:38,116 --> 00:43:40,824
It's an introductory offer
to advertise the product.
785
00:43:40,910 --> 00:43:43,744
All right.
I'll take one to help you out.
786
00:43:43,830 --> 00:43:47,244
Good.
You're my first sale today.
787
00:43:47,917 --> 00:43:49,533
May I?
788
00:43:54,382 --> 00:43:56,624
It does shine... indoors anyway.
789
00:43:56,717 --> 00:44:00,256
It will shine at night too.
It's a special process.
790
00:44:00,346 --> 00:44:01,427
What is it?
791
00:44:01,514 --> 00:44:02,675
Lily, only $5.00.
792
00:44:02,765 --> 00:44:04,757
His company's selling them
for advertising.
793
00:44:04,851 --> 00:44:07,559
That's just what I need.
You got a necklace?
794
00:44:07,645 --> 00:44:10,433
We don't carry necklaces.
We may later.
795
00:44:10,523 --> 00:44:13,311
Okay. I'll take a bracelet.
796
00:44:13,401 --> 00:44:15,609
That's the only sample I had.
I'm sorry.
797
00:44:15,695 --> 00:44:19,439
Aw. Tonight's my mother's birthday,
798
00:44:19,532 --> 00:44:22,616
and we'll never be through early enough
for me to get her anything.
799
00:44:22,702 --> 00:44:23,988
She's still in the hospital.
800
00:44:24,078 --> 00:44:27,116
Oh, Lily, take mine.
I'll get another one later.
801
00:44:27,206 --> 00:44:29,573
No, no. I don't know
when we're going to get another.
802
00:44:29,667 --> 00:44:31,659
There's been a strike at the factory,
you see.
803
00:44:31,752 --> 00:44:32,868
I can wait for mine.
804
00:44:32,962 --> 00:44:34,749
Oh, you owe him $5.00.
805
00:44:34,839 --> 00:44:36,580
Okay, kids, let's go.
806
00:44:38,217 --> 00:44:39,458
Sorry. Gotta go.
807
00:44:41,304 --> 00:44:43,341
Your 10 minutes is up. Come on, kids.
808
00:44:43,431 --> 00:44:45,172
- There's your $5.00.
- Let's go.
809
00:44:45,266 --> 00:44:46,723
I hope your mother likes it.
810
00:44:46,809 --> 00:44:49,517
My old lady's been dead
for 10 years.
811
00:44:49,604 --> 00:44:51,266
I'm just nuts about this stuff.
812
00:44:51,355 --> 00:44:54,189
When you get a necklace,
show it to me. I may buy it.
813
00:44:54,275 --> 00:44:56,642
I don't think the company'll
ever make necklaces.
814
00:44:56,736 --> 00:44:58,193
They'd be too dangerous.
815
00:44:58,279 --> 00:44:59,815
- Dangerous?
- Mm-hmm.
816
00:44:59,906 --> 00:45:01,272
Too much radioactivity.
817
00:45:01,365 --> 00:45:02,901
Radio what?
818
00:45:02,992 --> 00:45:05,405
These stones have been exposed
to atomic rays.
819
00:45:05,494 --> 00:45:06,905
That's why they shine.
820
00:45:06,996 --> 00:45:09,329
A necklace would be too strong.
821
00:45:09,415 --> 00:45:13,079
All those radioactive stones
bunched up around your neck like that.
822
00:45:14,587 --> 00:45:17,000
You don't have to worry
about a bracelet though.
823
00:45:17,089 --> 00:45:20,332
Just put Vaseline
on your wrist every night.
824
00:45:20,426 --> 00:45:23,669
Don't skimp. A thick layer of Vaseline.
825
00:45:23,763 --> 00:45:26,005
Vaseline. Why?
826
00:45:26,098 --> 00:45:28,511
It'll keep your wrist from peeling.
827
00:45:29,518 --> 00:45:32,761
Hey! What kind of jewelry you selling?
828
00:45:32,855 --> 00:45:36,098
Atomic-ray jewelry.
It's a new French company.
829
00:45:36,192 --> 00:45:39,526
Well, they're not gonna be in business
long making people peel.
830
00:45:39,612 --> 00:45:42,025
You must be crazy.
831
00:45:42,114 --> 00:45:46,449
Yes. We're going to have
to iron that bug out.
832
00:45:50,790 --> 00:45:52,702
Hey, Mac.
833
00:45:52,792 --> 00:45:54,784
Aren't you forgetting something?
834
00:45:54,877 --> 00:45:56,869
Oh, I beg your pardon.
835
00:46:00,341 --> 00:46:01,331
He'll pay you.
836
00:46:01,425 --> 00:46:02,415
Hold it.
837
00:46:02,510 --> 00:46:05,719
Is he all right
for 20 cents on your check?
838
00:46:05,805 --> 00:46:07,171
Yeah, I'll pay it.
839
00:46:07,265 --> 00:46:08,506
Okay.
840
00:46:08,599 --> 00:46:10,135
Thank you.
841
00:46:15,356 --> 00:46:18,815
Harvey, bring me down a list
of all the real estate we own downtown.
842
00:46:18,901 --> 00:46:20,187
I'm interested specifically...
843
00:46:20,278 --> 00:46:23,612
in whether there might be
any of those off-Broadway theaters
844
00:46:23,698 --> 00:46:24,905
in one of the parcels.
845
00:46:24,991 --> 00:46:26,903
Right away, please.
846
00:46:37,586 --> 00:46:39,202
May I?
847
00:46:41,549 --> 00:46:42,790
You must be pretty tired.
848
00:46:42,883 --> 00:46:44,875
How many times did you
go through that dance today?
849
00:46:44,969 --> 00:46:46,881
Oh, I lost count.
850
00:46:46,971 --> 00:46:49,634
Matter of fact,
sometimes I even trot home afterwards.
851
00:46:49,724 --> 00:46:51,386
You sleep better.
You ever trot?
852
00:46:51,475 --> 00:46:52,636
You mean, in the street?
853
00:46:52,727 --> 00:46:55,720
Sure. Nobody minds.
Come on. It keeps you in shape.
854
00:46:55,813 --> 00:46:57,805
Don't you think it will seem a little odd?
855
00:46:57,898 --> 00:47:00,857
- Come on.
- Uh... Uh... Amanda.
856
00:47:04,780 --> 00:47:06,362
Amanda.
857
00:47:14,832 --> 00:47:16,949
Let's get a taxi. Don't argue.
858
00:47:17,043 --> 00:47:20,582
Please, will you call me a taxi?
859
00:47:20,671 --> 00:47:22,378
Sure. You're a taxi.
860
00:47:23,549 --> 00:47:27,088
The guy who calls the taxis will be back
in 10 minutes. I only park the cars.
861
00:47:27,178 --> 00:47:29,761
I want to see the manager.
862
00:47:29,847 --> 00:47:33,136
Come back in three months. Maybe he'll be
out by then... with good behavior.
863
00:47:33,225 --> 00:47:35,308
Come on.
864
00:47:35,394 --> 00:47:37,727
He's only kidding.
865
00:47:39,857 --> 00:47:41,940
I'm sorry. I don't like
to be spoken to that way.
866
00:47:42,026 --> 00:47:45,064
- Something the matter?
- No, no. I'm just thinking.
867
00:47:45,154 --> 00:47:48,397
- About what?
- About how happy you are.
868
00:47:48,491 --> 00:47:50,448
- Me happy?
- Mm-hmm.
869
00:47:50,534 --> 00:47:53,743
You seem able to forget yourself.
870
00:47:54,580 --> 00:47:58,449
That's the way you dance,
and you walk in the street that way too.
871
00:47:58,542 --> 00:48:01,831
You seem at home wherever you are.
872
00:48:03,422 --> 00:48:05,914
It must be a great feeling. Taxi!
873
00:48:09,595 --> 00:48:10,927
Get in.
874
00:48:11,013 --> 00:48:13,346
- Oh, but where are we going?
- Uptown. Come on.
875
00:48:13,432 --> 00:48:16,675
Oh, can you lend me a couple of dollars?
I'm short.
876
00:48:19,188 --> 00:48:21,851
I don't usually borrow money.
877
00:48:24,527 --> 00:48:25,859
Thank you.
878
00:48:25,945 --> 00:48:28,653
But why don't we take a subway?
It's only 15 cents.
879
00:48:28,739 --> 00:48:31,356
The subway's too full of people.
Here we go.
880
00:48:31,450 --> 00:48:33,112
- Is this definite?
- Uptown.
881
00:48:34,703 --> 00:48:36,990
Seventy-fourth off Columbus Avenue.
882
00:48:58,269 --> 00:49:00,602
Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow.
883
00:49:00,688 --> 00:49:03,931
- Amanda, you mustn't throw yourself away.
- What?
884
00:49:04,024 --> 00:49:06,607
A girl like you could have
everything in the world.
885
00:49:06,694 --> 00:49:07,684
You sound like those men
886
00:49:07,778 --> 00:49:10,486
who send invitations to my dressing
room with their chauffeurs.
887
00:49:10,573 --> 00:49:12,610
Coming from you, it's kind of sweet.
888
00:49:12,700 --> 00:49:14,862
Amanda, you shouldn't work this hard.
889
00:49:14,952 --> 00:49:17,239
Dear man,
890
00:49:17,329 --> 00:49:19,616
you've got a whole wrong idea.
891
00:49:19,707 --> 00:49:22,199
You'll never get
anywhere in the theater unless you work.
892
00:49:22,293 --> 00:49:25,206
Right now,
when you walk home, work.
893
00:49:25,296 --> 00:49:29,210
Imagine. What would it be like
to lift your finger...
894
00:49:29,300 --> 00:49:32,464
and be able to have anything
your heart desires?
895
00:49:32,553 --> 00:49:34,465
What would that be like?
896
00:49:35,598 --> 00:49:37,055
I can't imagine.
897
00:49:37,141 --> 00:49:38,928
Well, think.
898
00:49:39,018 --> 00:49:42,887
Let's say you want a limousine.
You have it.
899
00:49:42,980 --> 00:49:45,188
Uh, a whole building.
900
00:49:45,274 --> 00:49:46,640
A girl.
901
00:49:46,734 --> 00:49:48,020
Not all girls.
902
00:49:48,110 --> 00:49:49,817
Well, an awful lot though.
903
00:49:49,904 --> 00:49:52,237
He wouldn't know
the difference anyway.
904
00:49:52,323 --> 00:49:56,067
How do you know?
Maybe he would... one time.
905
00:49:56,160 --> 00:49:59,324
That's a good idea. You're thinking.
906
00:49:59,413 --> 00:50:03,748
A man like that madly in love,
with all that power.
907
00:50:03,834 --> 00:50:06,622
You see? You're working.
908
00:50:06,712 --> 00:50:07,702
Oh, I am.
909
00:50:07,796 --> 00:50:09,628
But don't stop now.
Keep it up.
910
00:50:09,715 --> 00:50:11,798
- He's with a girl. He's saying good night.
- Hmm?
911
00:50:11,884 --> 00:50:13,716
She says "Good night." And...
912
00:50:13,802 --> 00:50:15,418
And what would he do?
913
00:50:16,055 --> 00:50:17,887
Probably grab for her.
914
00:50:20,601 --> 00:50:22,308
And what would she do?
915
00:50:22,394 --> 00:50:25,228
Well, there's your problem.
916
00:50:25,314 --> 00:50:27,931
- Good night.
- Please. You make me feel full of talent.
917
00:50:28,025 --> 00:50:29,937
Couldn't we work more?
918
00:50:30,027 --> 00:50:32,394
I can't. Not now.
919
00:50:32,488 --> 00:50:33,399
Good night.
920
00:50:33,489 --> 00:50:34,696
Uh... Uh...
921
00:50:57,304 --> 00:50:58,715
Sorry I'm late.
922
00:50:58,806 --> 00:51:00,763
Mmm!
923
00:51:03,143 --> 00:51:06,602
- You had your supper yet, Papa?
- Just waiting for you, my dear.
924
00:51:08,899 --> 00:51:11,812
Probably another one
of those young hoodlums again.
925
00:51:26,333 --> 00:51:31,453
Heavens! They've even got chauffeurs now.
926
00:51:31,547 --> 00:51:33,755
Can I use the phone, Willie?
927
00:51:33,841 --> 00:51:34,877
Say, Miller?
928
00:51:34,967 --> 00:51:36,253
Hi.
929
00:51:36,343 --> 00:51:38,050
What's going on?
930
00:51:38,137 --> 00:51:40,925
That's what I wanna find out...
what's going on.
931
00:51:46,353 --> 00:51:48,470
Freeway Realty? Mr. Osgood, please.
932
00:51:49,315 --> 00:51:52,433
Mr. Osgood, my name is Miller.
I'm general manager for the Theateround.
933
00:51:52,526 --> 00:51:55,519
I just received your letter.
There must be some mistake, sir.
934
00:51:56,655 --> 00:51:58,317
You're a real estate firm.
935
00:51:58,407 --> 00:52:01,491
Perhaps you don't realize
this isn't the way theaters are rented.
936
00:52:03,662 --> 00:52:06,029
Well, can't I even see you, sir?
937
00:52:09,043 --> 00:52:10,955
Give me a scotch, Willie.
938
00:52:11,045 --> 00:52:14,379
They're crazy. They want a year's rent
on the theater in advance.
939
00:52:14,465 --> 00:52:16,457
You ever heard of such a thing, Coffman?
940
00:52:17,134 --> 00:52:19,046
Can you get another theater?
941
00:52:19,136 --> 00:52:21,128
Where? We waited four months for this one.
942
00:52:21,221 --> 00:52:23,838
We're committed with contracts,
costumes, scenery.
943
00:52:24,808 --> 00:52:26,470
What'll I tell Burton?
944
00:52:26,560 --> 00:52:28,973
He's mortgaged his car, his home.
He's borrowed from everyone.
945
00:52:29,063 --> 00:52:30,349
It'll kill him.
946
00:52:32,358 --> 00:52:34,850
I just don't understand it.
947
00:52:44,870 --> 00:52:46,862
I found it, Mr. Coffman.
948
00:52:46,955 --> 00:52:50,369
Freeway Realty.
Principal stockholder, Investors National,
949
00:52:50,459 --> 00:52:52,826
which is controlled
by Clement Enterprises.
950
00:52:52,920 --> 00:52:56,539
- Anything else I can do?
- No, thank you, Susie.
951
00:53:00,302 --> 00:53:01,918
Bourbon, please.
952
00:53:03,180 --> 00:53:05,888
Six... doubles.
953
00:53:08,102 --> 00:53:11,937
You know, somebody once said that rich
people are only poor people with money.
954
00:53:12,022 --> 00:53:15,515
Well, he was lying.
Rich people aren't people, my friend.
955
00:53:15,609 --> 00:53:18,522
Oh, they can be charming,
democratic, polite.
956
00:53:18,612 --> 00:53:21,605
You can hardly tell them
from the human beings sometimes.
957
00:53:22,491 --> 00:53:25,154
Just be good and sure
you don't cross them.
958
00:53:32,000 --> 00:53:33,116
Sir.
959
00:53:39,633 --> 00:53:40,794
Aha!
960
00:53:42,761 --> 00:53:44,423
- Sit down.
- I will not.
961
00:53:46,181 --> 00:53:47,012
You've been drinking.
962
00:53:47,099 --> 00:53:48,715
Well, that shouldn't
surprise you.
963
00:53:48,809 --> 00:53:52,644
I'm sure your secret service department
has given you a complete report on me.
964
00:53:52,730 --> 00:53:56,815
When totally disgusted with the human
race, I become a social drinker.
965
00:53:56,900 --> 00:54:00,064
- Mr. Clement...
- You don't hold your liquor very well.
966
00:54:00,154 --> 00:54:02,237
It's not leaking out any place.
967
00:54:02,322 --> 00:54:04,439
And stop trying to interrupt me!
968
00:54:04,533 --> 00:54:06,900
You're very talkative when you drink.
969
00:54:06,994 --> 00:54:08,110
What's this all about?
970
00:54:08,203 --> 00:54:10,866
Well, who's going
to tell you the truth when he's sober?
971
00:54:10,956 --> 00:54:13,664
You're a very vain man, Your Majesty.
972
00:54:13,751 --> 00:54:17,244
All those little jokes that you just kill
people around here with,
973
00:54:17,337 --> 00:54:20,125
they didn't go over so big
down in that theater, did they?
974
00:54:20,215 --> 00:54:23,424
And how's it going with that girl?
Not so hot, huh?
975
00:54:23,510 --> 00:54:26,093
When you haven't got
the old green stuff going for you?
976
00:54:26,180 --> 00:54:29,673
Money, my lord... That's all they ever
kissed when they kissed you. Money.
977
00:54:29,767 --> 00:54:33,135
- I believe you'd better go now, Coffman.
- Go? I quit!
978
00:54:35,856 --> 00:54:37,563
Just one question though.
979
00:54:37,649 --> 00:54:40,608
How do you sleep nights
when you close a show,
980
00:54:40,694 --> 00:54:43,482
put 40 people out of work
and bankrupt a man,
981
00:54:43,572 --> 00:54:45,609
all because he had the colossal gall...
982
00:54:45,699 --> 00:54:47,691
to poke a little fun
at the great Jean-Marc Clement?
983
00:54:47,785 --> 00:54:48,775
Close a show?
984
00:54:48,869 --> 00:54:51,737
Oh, they'll never prove in court
that you closed the show,
985
00:54:51,830 --> 00:54:55,699
but what a coincidence that you're the
biggest stockholder in Investors National,
986
00:54:55,793 --> 00:54:58,911
which is the biggest stockholder
in Freeway Realty,
987
00:54:59,004 --> 00:55:02,714
which suddenly wants
a year's rent in advance for the theater.
988
00:55:02,800 --> 00:55:06,214
Quite a "coincidince"!
989
00:55:06,303 --> 00:55:07,794
Dence.
990
00:55:07,888 --> 00:55:10,255
I see. George Wales.
991
00:55:11,266 --> 00:55:14,134
He raised me, you see.
He was worried about me.
992
00:55:16,855 --> 00:55:19,313
I know nothing about this, Coffman.
993
00:55:20,651 --> 00:55:22,108
Come here.
994
00:55:24,696 --> 00:55:27,154
Oh, come now, I listened to you politely.
995
00:55:28,784 --> 00:55:30,275
Sit down.
996
00:55:35,874 --> 00:55:37,331
Sit down.
997
00:55:41,046 --> 00:55:44,505
You're making one mistake.
Very important.
998
00:55:45,592 --> 00:55:49,757
It is true that people laugh too loudly
at my jokes because I am rich.
999
00:55:50,848 --> 00:55:52,885
I know that.
1000
00:55:52,975 --> 00:55:56,059
But what can I do? I like to tell jokes.
1001
00:55:56,144 --> 00:55:58,807
Shall only poor people tell jokes?
1002
00:55:59,731 --> 00:56:03,145
It is also true I give out many bracelets.
1003
00:56:03,235 --> 00:56:04,897
But I must.
1004
00:56:04,987 --> 00:56:07,195
They expect bracelets.
1005
00:56:08,198 --> 00:56:10,690
You say I am vain.
1006
00:56:10,784 --> 00:56:12,491
No.
1007
00:56:12,578 --> 00:56:15,867
If I were vain, I would
refuse to give bracelets.
1008
00:56:15,956 --> 00:56:19,540
I would say you must love me
for my charming smile.
1009
00:56:21,044 --> 00:56:25,129
But is it ever possible
to love a rich man for his smile?
1010
00:56:26,091 --> 00:56:29,334
Look. You. Yourself.
1011
00:56:29,428 --> 00:56:33,843
Whenever you speak to me, you say "sir."
"Sir," "sir," "sir."
1012
00:56:35,017 --> 00:56:37,805
You respect me so much, Mr. Coffman?
1013
00:56:38,770 --> 00:56:42,354
Obviously not. It is my money you salute.
1014
00:56:42,441 --> 00:56:44,728
- That is true, isn't it?
- Yes, it is.
1015
00:56:44,818 --> 00:56:48,152
But of course. It is always true.
1016
00:56:48,238 --> 00:56:50,821
Except in one person.
1017
00:56:51,575 --> 00:56:54,864
Only that girl has ever spoken to me...
1018
00:56:54,953 --> 00:56:57,240
Not to my money, not to my name...
1019
00:56:58,624 --> 00:57:00,035
but to me.
1020
00:57:01,126 --> 00:57:03,038
And I do not intend to lose her.
1021
00:57:03,128 --> 00:57:05,370
Oh, I hope you don't.
1022
00:57:05,464 --> 00:57:07,501
Oh, I deeply hope you don't.
1023
00:57:07,591 --> 00:57:11,801
There is a job here...
for an honest man.
1024
00:57:12,471 --> 00:57:14,178
Thank you, sir.
1025
00:57:14,765 --> 00:57:16,927
I wasn't addressing your money that time.
1026
00:57:17,017 --> 00:57:18,758
I'll see you in the morning.
1027
00:57:18,852 --> 00:57:20,218
And...
1028
00:57:21,229 --> 00:57:22,720
for your wife.
1029
00:57:22,814 --> 00:57:25,557
- To forgive me for keeping you so late.
- Oh!
1030
00:57:25,651 --> 00:57:28,143
Now, don't tell me
I am buying your approval.
1031
00:57:28,236 --> 00:57:29,647
I am.
1032
00:57:29,738 --> 00:57:32,105
But one can only give what one has,
1033
00:57:32,699 --> 00:57:34,315
and I give you that.
1034
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:37,823
Get in early. There will be a lot to do.
1035
00:57:37,913 --> 00:57:39,575
I want my wife to be wonderful.
1036
00:57:39,665 --> 00:57:43,375
I have to find a way
to put a lot of money in that show.
1037
00:57:43,460 --> 00:57:45,372
Your wife?
1038
00:57:46,004 --> 00:57:48,166
Hey there, now!
1039
00:57:48,256 --> 00:57:51,749
So when Mr. Welch here mentioned
that he'd like to invest in a show,
1040
00:57:51,843 --> 00:57:55,712
I said to myself, "I've seen part of
Burton's show and I think it's very good."
1041
00:57:55,806 --> 00:57:58,344
So as long as he has the bug
to take a flyer anyway,
1042
00:57:58,433 --> 00:58:00,595
why, I thought I'd bring you two together.
1043
00:58:00,686 --> 00:58:02,678
Well, I'm flattered you
like the show well enough...
1044
00:58:02,771 --> 00:58:04,888
to recommend your friend
putting money in it.
1045
00:58:04,982 --> 00:58:08,020
But I'm not sure we can use
any additional money.
1046
00:58:08,110 --> 00:58:09,601
Is that so?
1047
00:58:09,695 --> 00:58:11,903
Yes. We're fully financed.
1048
00:58:11,989 --> 00:58:15,278
However, there may be...
I'm just saying there may be...
1049
00:58:15,367 --> 00:58:17,654
some small share of backing still open.
1050
00:58:17,744 --> 00:58:19,781
I'll have to go over the books.
1051
00:58:19,871 --> 00:58:22,989
And if there is,
well, you can have it.
1052
00:58:23,083 --> 00:58:24,324
That's very kind of you.
1053
00:58:24,418 --> 00:58:25,909
May I speak frankly?
1054
00:58:26,003 --> 00:58:28,871
- Yes, of course. Go right ahead.
- I like you.
1055
00:58:28,964 --> 00:58:31,502
I like the notion of
a retired merchant like you...
1056
00:58:31,591 --> 00:58:33,457
being interested in show business.
1057
00:58:33,969 --> 00:58:35,505
That's why I'm letting you in.
1058
00:58:35,595 --> 00:58:36,961
I see.
1059
00:58:37,055 --> 00:58:40,389
Now, um, may I speak frankly?
1060
00:58:40,475 --> 00:58:43,434
- Go right ahead.
- Thank you.
1061
00:58:43,520 --> 00:58:47,981
I've been horse trading across a desk like
this for the last 30 years,
1062
00:58:48,066 --> 00:58:50,228
and in all that time, I don't think I've
ever come across anyone...
1063
00:58:50,318 --> 00:58:52,230
quite as bad at it as you.
1064
00:58:52,320 --> 00:58:53,777
You're just awful.
1065
00:58:53,864 --> 00:58:55,275
I beg your pardon?
1066
00:58:55,365 --> 00:58:58,153
Let me give you a sample of frankness.
1067
00:58:58,243 --> 00:59:00,701
Not only aren't you
fully financed, Mr. Burton,
1068
00:59:00,787 --> 00:59:04,326
but you're faced with having to get
together a year's theater rent in advance.
1069
00:59:04,416 --> 00:59:05,406
You foolishly...
1070
00:59:05,500 --> 00:59:07,992
You foolishly mortgaged your home
and you can't raise any more money.
1071
00:59:08,086 --> 00:59:10,123
And if I were to wait another 10 days,
1072
00:59:10,213 --> 00:59:13,297
I could pick up your theater for nothing
and probably your house as well.
1073
00:59:13,383 --> 00:59:17,093
That's frankness. Please close your mouth,
young man. Now then... Thank you.
1074
00:59:17,179 --> 00:59:19,466
Now then, because I like you,
1075
00:59:19,556 --> 00:59:22,344
I am prepared
to finance your show entirely...
1076
00:59:22,434 --> 00:59:24,096
and take only 51 percent.
1077
00:59:24,186 --> 00:59:26,769
Then you'll have control.
1078
00:59:26,855 --> 00:59:27,891
Of course I will.
1079
00:59:27,981 --> 00:59:31,019
I never dream of putting any money into
anything unless I have complete control.
1080
00:59:31,109 --> 00:59:33,442
I urge you to accept
this offer, Mr. Burton.
1081
00:59:33,528 --> 00:59:35,360
It's very generous.
1082
00:59:38,283 --> 00:59:40,570
You want to know something? It is.
1083
00:59:40,660 --> 00:59:43,073
You're smarter than I thought,
Mr. Burton.
1084
00:59:43,163 --> 00:59:44,620
I'll read it after I sign it.
1085
00:59:49,086 --> 00:59:51,169
I've got 51 percent of the show.
1086
00:59:51,254 --> 00:59:53,041
Complete control.
1087
01:00:19,407 --> 01:00:20,693
Hold it, kids.
1088
01:00:20,784 --> 01:00:22,150
Hold it.
1089
01:00:22,577 --> 01:00:24,034
Hold it, kids.
1090
01:00:24,121 --> 01:00:26,283
Gather round. Everybody.
Come on. Gather round.
1091
01:00:26,373 --> 01:00:27,864
Which one's the bride?
1092
01:00:27,958 --> 01:00:28,948
She's not around.
1093
01:00:29,042 --> 01:00:31,409
You know, I can't believe it.
I didn't think he'd ever get married.
1094
01:00:31,503 --> 01:00:33,085
- I'd given up.
- Hmm.
1095
01:00:33,171 --> 01:00:34,412
- What?
- There.
1096
01:00:34,506 --> 01:00:37,715
Now, gather in. And you.
Come on in. John, you.
1097
01:00:37,801 --> 01:00:41,636
Ooh. There'll be children.
Lots of children.
1098
01:00:41,721 --> 01:00:44,338
Coffman, there's a bonus
in this for you if they get married.
1099
01:00:44,432 --> 01:00:46,139
And double if there's a baby.
1100
01:00:46,226 --> 01:00:47,637
A boy.
1101
01:00:48,728 --> 01:00:50,344
I'll do whatever I can, sir.
1102
01:00:50,438 --> 01:00:54,307
I know you've heard the rumor
that I've been having money troubles.
1103
01:00:54,401 --> 01:00:57,109
Well, it was true... Was true.
1104
01:00:57,195 --> 01:00:59,687
I have here a cashier's check...
1105
01:00:59,781 --> 01:01:02,990
for more than enough money
to open this show.
1106
01:01:03,076 --> 01:01:06,319
I won't tell you how much, because you'll
come around asking for raises.
1107
01:01:06,413 --> 01:01:08,746
And I would like to take this occasion...
1108
01:01:08,832 --> 01:01:11,040
to introduce my new partner,
Mr. George Welch,
1109
01:01:11,126 --> 01:01:12,867
a retired merchant
interested in show business.
1110
01:01:12,961 --> 01:01:16,329
Mr. Welch? Your grateful company.
1111
01:01:21,678 --> 01:01:23,294
All right, clear the stage.
1112
01:01:23,388 --> 01:01:25,050
That doesn't mean anything, sir.
1113
01:01:25,140 --> 01:01:27,632
People in show business are always
throwing their arms around each other.
1114
01:01:27,726 --> 01:01:29,183
They're very exuberant.
1115
01:01:29,269 --> 01:01:31,727
Why can't she be exuberant with Jean-Marc,
for heaven's sake?
1116
01:01:32,606 --> 01:01:34,097
"Specialization."
1117
01:01:34,191 --> 01:01:36,274
Let's take it from the bridge, boys.
1118
01:01:39,863 --> 01:01:41,980
♪♪ This is the number he was hired for, sir.
1119
01:01:42,073 --> 01:01:43,735
Now we'll see it.
1120
01:01:46,161 --> 01:01:47,572
♪ Marc Clemens ♪
1121
01:01:49,039 --> 01:01:52,123
♪ Gives the gals
the tremens ♪
1122
01:01:52,209 --> 01:01:54,075
♪ This Casanovan ♪
1123
01:01:54,169 --> 01:01:57,412
♪ Sure has the roving-est eyes ♪
1124
01:01:59,424 --> 01:02:02,007
♪ Specialization ♪
1125
01:02:02,844 --> 01:02:05,632
♪ Specialization ♪
1126
01:02:05,722 --> 01:02:08,931
♪ You rule
the barnyard if ♪
1127
01:02:09,017 --> 01:02:11,555
Hold it! Hold it.
1128
01:02:11,645 --> 01:02:13,853
You know what might be cute
if it didn't spoil the mood?
1129
01:02:13,939 --> 01:02:17,728
When she sings about him,
let him go, "Cock-a-doodle-doo."
1130
01:02:18,693 --> 01:02:20,309
Yeah, that's very funny, Oliver.
1131
01:02:20,403 --> 01:02:22,315
Go on. Go "Cock-a-doodle-doo."
1132
01:02:22,948 --> 01:02:24,530
Go on.
1133
01:02:24,616 --> 01:02:26,152
Cock-a-doodle-doo.
1134
01:02:26,243 --> 01:02:28,485
No, no, no.
Like a real rooster. You know...
1135
01:02:28,578 --> 01:02:30,410
Cock-a-doodle-doo!
1136
01:02:30,497 --> 01:02:31,988
Like that.
1137
01:02:32,999 --> 01:02:34,865
Cock-a-doodle-doo.
1138
01:02:35,460 --> 01:02:36,826
Again.
1139
01:02:38,088 --> 01:02:39,545
Cock-a-doodle-doo!
1140
01:02:39,631 --> 01:02:42,715
No, louder. Cock-a-doodle-doo!
1141
01:02:42,801 --> 01:02:43,917
Like that.
1142
01:02:44,010 --> 01:02:45,376
- Like that?
- Yeah.
1143
01:02:47,055 --> 01:02:48,967
Cock-a-doodle-doo!
1144
01:02:49,057 --> 01:02:50,639
That's very good.
We'll keep it in.
1145
01:02:50,725 --> 01:02:52,717
Practice that at home. All right, kids.
1146
01:02:52,811 --> 01:02:55,474
Get your costumes on, and we'll try
the whole number from the top.
1147
01:02:55,563 --> 01:02:57,976
Dress rehearsal. All doubles on stage.
1148
01:02:58,066 --> 01:03:00,103
Dress rehearsal.
Come on, kids. Let's go, huh?
1149
01:03:00,193 --> 01:03:02,185
Let's pick up
on the cues faster, shall we?
1150
01:03:02,279 --> 01:03:04,862
"Specialization."
1151
01:03:08,576 --> 01:03:10,943
♪ If you peruse
the people in the news ♪
1152
01:03:11,037 --> 01:03:13,370
♪ The people
that the magazines ♪
1153
01:03:13,456 --> 01:03:15,072
♪ Refer to ♪
1154
01:03:15,166 --> 01:03:19,456
♪ You'll find that they
are naturally soigné ♪
1155
01:03:19,546 --> 01:03:22,755
♪ The special ones
that all of us ♪
1156
01:03:22,841 --> 01:03:24,503
♪ Defer to ♪
1157
01:03:24,592 --> 01:03:27,756
♪ They've each a trait
that seems to state ♪
1158
01:03:27,846 --> 01:03:30,259
♪ First-raters ♪
1159
01:03:30,348 --> 01:03:34,934
♪ Which separates them
from the small per ♪
1160
01:03:35,020 --> 01:03:37,182
♪ Taters ♪
1161
01:03:38,898 --> 01:03:40,935
♪ Maria Callas ♪
1162
01:03:42,444 --> 01:03:44,436
♪ Is booked in Dallas ♪
1163
01:03:46,239 --> 01:03:49,448
♪ Red carpets rolled out
and they're sold out ♪
1164
01:03:49,534 --> 01:03:52,868
♪ Clear to the sky ♪
1165
01:03:52,954 --> 01:03:56,163
♪ Specialization ♪
1166
01:03:56,249 --> 01:03:59,208
♪ Specialization ♪
1167
01:03:59,294 --> 01:04:01,331
♪ They love
your high notes if ♪
1168
01:04:04,549 --> 01:04:07,257
♪ If you specialize ♪
1169
01:04:08,345 --> 01:04:09,961
♪ When Elvis rotates ♪
1170
01:04:11,723 --> 01:04:13,510
♪ Each critic notates ♪
1171
01:04:15,268 --> 01:04:18,477
♪ It may look funny
But the money's ♪
1172
01:04:18,563 --> 01:04:19,644
♪ What it supplies ♪
1173
01:04:22,025 --> 01:04:25,393
♪ Specialization ♪
1174
01:04:25,487 --> 01:04:28,275
♪ Specialization ♪
1175
01:04:28,365 --> 01:04:30,357
♪ You'll meet
the colonel if ♪
1176
01:04:33,536 --> 01:04:36,779
♪ If you specialize ♪
1177
01:04:36,873 --> 01:04:38,910
♪ Salome did it with ♪
1178
01:04:39,000 --> 01:04:40,366
♪ Veils ♪
1179
01:04:40,460 --> 01:04:43,749
- ♪ Abe Lincoln did it with ♪
- ♪ Rails ♪
1180
01:04:43,838 --> 01:04:46,626
- ♪ Toledo did it with ♪
- ♪ Scales ♪
1181
01:04:47,217 --> 01:04:49,550
♪ The Chinese built that wall ♪
1182
01:04:49,636 --> 01:04:51,593
♪ Ooh, specialists all ♪
1183
01:04:51,679 --> 01:04:52,840
♪ Marc Clemens ♪
1184
01:04:54,349 --> 01:04:56,466
♪ Gives the gals the tremens ♪
1185
01:04:57,894 --> 01:04:59,556
♪ This Casanovan ♪
1186
01:04:59,646 --> 01:05:02,730
♪ Sure has the roving-est eyes ♪
1187
01:05:04,859 --> 01:05:07,476
♪ Specialization ♪
1188
01:05:08,196 --> 01:05:10,813
♪ Specialization ♪
1189
01:05:10,907 --> 01:05:13,399
♪ You'll rule
the barnyard if ♪
1190
01:05:14,119 --> 01:05:17,908
Cock-a-doodle-doo!
1191
01:05:17,997 --> 01:05:20,489
♪ If you specialize ♪
1192
01:05:22,210 --> 01:05:23,542
♪ Van Cliburn ♪
1193
01:05:25,171 --> 01:05:28,505
♪ Caused us a high burn ♪
1194
01:05:28,591 --> 01:05:30,708
♪ While we were blushin' ♪
1195
01:05:30,802 --> 01:05:33,545
♪ Some Russian
gave him a prize ♪
1196
01:05:35,473 --> 01:05:38,386
- ♪ Specialization ♪
- Da. Da.
1197
01:05:38,893 --> 01:05:41,601
- ♪ Specialization ♪
- Da. Da.
1198
01:05:41,688 --> 01:05:45,523
♪ They'll give ya medals if ♪
1199
01:05:45,608 --> 01:05:47,565
♪ They'll love your high notes ♪
1200
01:05:47,652 --> 01:05:50,190
♪ If ♪
1201
01:05:50,280 --> 01:05:52,363
- ♪ You'll meet the colonel ♪
- ♪ If ♪
1202
01:05:55,535 --> 01:05:56,901
♪ You'll rule the barnyard ♪
1203
01:05:56,995 --> 01:05:58,952
♪ If ♪
1204
01:05:59,706 --> 01:06:01,948
Cock-a-doodle-doo!
1205
01:06:04,252 --> 01:06:09,668
♪ If you specialize ♪♪
1206
01:06:13,928 --> 01:06:17,342
I specialize.
1207
01:06:20,768 --> 01:06:25,308
Jean-Marc Clement a rooster.
His father's turning in his grave.
1208
01:06:25,398 --> 01:06:28,015
You are damn right it's no good.
1209
01:06:28,109 --> 01:06:30,977
I didn't count on looking that ridiculous.
1210
01:06:31,571 --> 01:06:34,689
He's got all the jokes,
and I'm going "Cock-a-doodle-doo."
1211
01:06:34,782 --> 01:06:37,775
You take his jokes and let him
go cock-a-doodle-doo.
1212
01:06:38,411 --> 01:06:41,370
- How about firing him?
- No, no. That would upset her.
1213
01:06:41,623 --> 01:06:43,785
You'll never impress her
by being a rooster...
1214
01:06:43,875 --> 01:06:45,161
unless she's a chicken.
1215
01:06:46,336 --> 01:06:49,170
You know,
there are definite ways to attract women.
1216
01:06:49,255 --> 01:06:52,999
When you're 10 years old, they like it if
you walk on your hands for 'em.
1217
01:06:53,092 --> 01:06:54,833
When they're older,
they like other things,
1218
01:06:54,928 --> 01:06:57,090
best of all if you're rich.
1219
01:06:57,180 --> 01:07:01,049
Jean-Marc, tell her who you are.
You'll be engaged within 15 minutes.
1220
01:07:02,185 --> 01:07:05,178
Oh, perhaps that's
just what you're afraid of.
1221
01:07:06,856 --> 01:07:09,394
Perhaps I am. A little.
1222
01:07:09,484 --> 01:07:11,817
My dear boy,
nobody's loved for themselves alone.
1223
01:07:11,903 --> 01:07:15,522
You're loved for what you can do.
If she could see you as I have...
1224
01:07:15,615 --> 01:07:18,824
holding the floor at a directors' meeting
for an entire afternoon,
1225
01:07:18,910 --> 01:07:22,244
trying to persuade a nervous $10 million
to invest in a project.
1226
01:07:22,330 --> 01:07:25,744
Then she'd be impressed.
She might even fall in love with you.
1227
01:07:25,833 --> 01:07:27,825
That's you.
1228
01:07:27,919 --> 01:07:29,831
No, George, that's my power.
1229
01:07:29,921 --> 01:07:31,833
That is five generations of money.
1230
01:07:31,923 --> 01:07:33,755
That is a billionaire.
1231
01:07:34,759 --> 01:07:36,842
But it is not me.
1232
01:07:36,928 --> 01:07:40,262
And this girl,
I want to fall in love with me.
1233
01:07:40,348 --> 01:07:42,385
At the moment, she's admiring Tony Danton.
1234
01:07:42,475 --> 01:07:44,307
She's kissing Tony Danton,
and I'll tell you...
1235
01:07:44,394 --> 01:07:46,852
There's no big mystery
about human attraction.
1236
01:07:46,938 --> 01:07:50,306
She'll go on admiring him, she'll go on
kissing him, and they'll fall in love.
1237
01:07:50,400 --> 01:07:52,312
And you, with a billion dollars
in your pocket,
1238
01:07:52,402 --> 01:07:55,861
can go cock your doodle-doo
till you grow feathers.
1239
01:07:55,947 --> 01:07:59,111
Every man to his own battlefield, my boy.
1240
01:07:59,200 --> 01:08:01,908
On this one, you haven't got a prayer.
1241
01:08:02,996 --> 01:08:04,988
Unless...
1242
01:08:05,081 --> 01:08:06,788
Unless I get stronger ammunition.
1243
01:08:06,874 --> 01:08:09,207
- What do you mean?
- It's only bought for him.
1244
01:08:09,294 --> 01:08:10,956
People write his jokes,
1245
01:08:11,045 --> 01:08:14,413
and not the best,
because that show can't afford the best.
1246
01:08:14,507 --> 01:08:17,341
But I can.
1247
01:08:17,427 --> 01:08:19,214
Do you have any ideas or suggestions?
1248
01:08:19,304 --> 01:08:20,761
Not offha... Oh.
1249
01:08:20,847 --> 01:08:25,012
Well, we do own a large block of stock
in NBC, don't we?
1250
01:08:25,101 --> 01:08:29,220
Now let me think. Our...
Our two men there are Comstock and Yale.
1251
01:08:29,314 --> 01:08:31,476
They both hold key positions on the board.
1252
01:08:31,566 --> 01:08:33,523
- Tell them I want a teacher.
- What?
1253
01:08:33,610 --> 01:08:36,318
Tell them to get me
the greatest comedian in the world.
1254
01:08:37,572 --> 01:08:41,236
That's very flattering, but I can think of
many greater comedians than myself.
1255
01:08:41,326 --> 01:08:43,113
For instance, there's, uh...
1256
01:08:43,995 --> 01:08:45,531
There's, um...
1257
01:08:46,122 --> 01:08:47,533
Or...
1258
01:08:48,583 --> 01:08:50,165
You know, maybe you're right.
1259
01:08:50,251 --> 01:08:54,416
Mr. Berle, I want you to give
serious consideration to my offer.
1260
01:08:54,505 --> 01:08:57,339
Oh, I have.
This is a very, very generous offer,
1261
01:08:57,425 --> 01:08:59,041
but as Mr. Comstock
and Mr. Yale will tell you,
1262
01:08:59,135 --> 01:09:01,627
I'm under a long-term contract
to the network.
1263
01:09:01,721 --> 01:09:03,553
Oh, that's all right, Milton.
1264
01:09:03,640 --> 01:09:07,259
Clement Enterprises
has a large block of shares in NBC.
1265
01:09:07,810 --> 01:09:09,142
Oh, I see.
1266
01:09:09,228 --> 01:09:12,517
Well, sir, this is a very,
very fantastic figure.
1267
01:09:12,607 --> 01:09:15,566
The first time I read it I didn't know if
this was what you were going to pay me,
1268
01:09:15,652 --> 01:09:17,518
or my Social Security number.
1269
01:09:22,950 --> 01:09:25,283
Well, Mr. Berle, can you do the job?
1270
01:09:28,998 --> 01:09:32,241
Sir, it's all according
to how funny you're talking about.
1271
01:09:32,335 --> 01:09:34,418
Are you talking about ha-ha funny...
1272
01:09:34,504 --> 01:09:36,370
or ha-ha-ha-ha funny...
1273
01:09:36,464 --> 01:09:38,877
or hardy-har-har funny?
1274
01:09:38,966 --> 01:09:43,301
Now, let me show you first
my, uh... my comedy walk.
1275
01:09:43,388 --> 01:09:45,345
It's a very big scream. My ankle bit.
1276
01:09:45,431 --> 01:09:47,423
See, I stand up,
and I walk around on my ankles.
1277
01:09:54,649 --> 01:09:56,766
Now, stand up, sir,
and let me show you how to do it.
1278
01:09:56,859 --> 01:09:59,272
- You gotta turn your ankle...
- Mr. Berle. Mr. Berle!
1279
01:09:59,362 --> 01:10:01,354
I am not your pupil.
1280
01:10:07,704 --> 01:10:09,240
You're not the gentleman
I'm going to teach?
1281
01:10:09,330 --> 01:10:10,537
No.
1282
01:10:10,915 --> 01:10:12,247
Well, then who is?
1283
01:10:12,333 --> 01:10:14,620
Jean-Marc Clement.
1284
01:10:21,509 --> 01:10:23,000
That's fine. That's better.
1285
01:10:23,094 --> 01:10:24,756
A little broader.
A little broader. That's fine.
1286
01:10:24,846 --> 01:10:27,133
Now turn around the other way.
You're doing great, sir.
1287
01:10:27,223 --> 01:10:30,011
That's it. Up there.
Wonderful. Wonderful!
1288
01:10:30,101 --> 01:10:32,093
It's the worst thing I have ever seen.
1289
01:10:32,186 --> 01:10:33,768
- Am I doing something wrong?
- Oh, no, no.
1290
01:10:33,855 --> 01:10:36,848
You're doing it swell, but you have to
exaggerate a little more, sir.
1291
01:10:36,941 --> 01:10:38,432
Watch me again, will ya?
1292
01:10:38,526 --> 01:10:43,146
Dough, dough, dough, dough.
1293
01:10:43,239 --> 01:10:45,947
You understand? Look, you say those words
as you do it. Go ahead.
1294
01:10:48,286 --> 01:10:53,077
Dough. Dough. Dough. Dough.
1295
01:10:53,166 --> 01:10:56,750
You sound as if dough
doesn't mean anything to you.
1296
01:10:56,836 --> 01:10:57,872
And it probably doesn't.
1297
01:10:57,962 --> 01:11:01,797
Can you show me something
a little more, uh, sophisticated?
1298
01:11:02,800 --> 01:11:04,883
- Sophisticated.
- Yeah.
1299
01:11:04,969 --> 01:11:06,050
Let me see.
1300
01:11:06,137 --> 01:11:08,629
I have it, baby...
Uh, pardon me, Mr. Clement.
1301
01:11:08,723 --> 01:11:10,385
I have it.
I have a great, great idea.
1302
01:11:10,475 --> 01:11:11,966
- Sophistication you want?
- Yes.
1303
01:11:12,059 --> 01:11:13,846
Oh, this is gonna be great.
You walk out...
1304
01:11:13,936 --> 01:11:16,553
Walk out on the stage
very sophisticated like. You see?
1305
01:11:16,647 --> 01:11:20,186
Very debonair. Suave. Classy.
1306
01:11:20,276 --> 01:11:22,859
With dignity and charm,
and you stand there,
1307
01:11:22,945 --> 01:11:25,312
and you look at the audience
for a brief second,
1308
01:11:25,406 --> 01:11:27,819
and then you walk around like this.
1309
01:11:28,951 --> 01:11:30,943
The audience will scream. They'll scream.
1310
01:11:31,037 --> 01:11:34,201
Mr. Berle, I'd rather not.
This is more you than me.
1311
01:11:34,290 --> 01:11:35,872
I have... Oh, boy.
1312
01:11:35,958 --> 01:11:38,041
I have a gag that I always do.
1313
01:11:38,127 --> 01:11:40,119
It's dynamite.
It's the best thing that I've ever done.
1314
01:11:40,213 --> 01:11:42,546
- Is this material original?
- Original?
1315
01:11:42,632 --> 01:11:44,544
Mm-hmm.
1316
01:11:46,844 --> 01:11:48,756
Forget it. We'll try something else.
1317
01:11:48,846 --> 01:11:50,963
Um, let's see...
1318
01:11:51,057 --> 01:11:54,266
Oh. I have... I have a joke...
1319
01:11:54,352 --> 01:11:58,016
When I do it on television,
40 million Americans scream at this.
1320
01:11:58,105 --> 01:12:00,017
And here's the line. You... Listen.
1321
01:12:00,107 --> 01:12:01,973
I swear I'll "kew" you.
1322
01:12:02,068 --> 01:12:05,527
I'll "kew" you a million times.
1323
01:12:05,613 --> 01:12:06,603
- You like that, huh?
- Yes.
1324
01:12:06,697 --> 01:12:07,687
He likes that.
1325
01:12:07,782 --> 01:12:09,865
Will you try it? "I swear I'll kew you.
1326
01:12:09,951 --> 01:12:11,943
I'll kew you a million times."
Say it. Go ahead.
1327
01:12:13,621 --> 01:12:14,953
That's it. Now say it.
1328
01:12:15,039 --> 01:12:16,951
I swear I kill you.
1329
01:12:17,041 --> 01:12:19,078
I kill you a million times.
1330
01:12:21,504 --> 01:12:23,245
- I'm sick.
- Sick?
1331
01:12:23,339 --> 01:12:26,332
Yeah, I'm sick from
laughing at you, 'cause you're great.
1332
01:12:26,425 --> 01:12:27,632
- You're great.
- No.
1333
01:12:27,718 --> 01:12:30,882
You're very kind, Mr. Berle,
but I don't think I did it right.
1334
01:12:30,972 --> 01:12:33,305
Oh, come on, Mr. Clement.
You're wonderful.
1335
01:12:33,391 --> 01:12:35,724
Are you gonna listen to your Uncle Miltie?
You're great.
1336
01:12:35,810 --> 01:12:38,803
You're wonderful,
but there's only one little thing.
1337
01:12:38,896 --> 01:12:42,606
It isn't the word "kill." It's "kew."
1338
01:12:42,692 --> 01:12:45,480
Kew. See? Let me hear you say it.
1339
01:12:45,570 --> 01:12:47,857
- Kill.
- No, not ki... It's "kew."
1340
01:12:48,781 --> 01:12:50,738
- Kill.
- No, you have to purse your lips.
1341
01:12:50,825 --> 01:12:52,407
- May I...
- Please.
1342
01:12:52,952 --> 01:12:53,988
- Kew.
- Kill.
1343
01:12:54,078 --> 01:12:55,694
Not kill. Relax. Relax.
1344
01:12:55,788 --> 01:12:57,074
- Kew.
- Kill.
1345
01:12:57,164 --> 01:12:58,575
- Kew.
- Kill.
1346
01:12:58,666 --> 01:13:00,658
No, ki... The "L" is silent. Say kew.
1347
01:13:00,751 --> 01:13:03,038
- Key-ee.
- No, not "key-ee." No, just "kew."
1348
01:13:03,129 --> 01:13:04,290
- Kew.
- Key.
1349
01:13:04,380 --> 01:13:05,587
- Kew. Kew.
- Key.
1350
01:13:05,673 --> 01:13:06,663
- No, kew.
- Key.
1351
01:13:06,757 --> 01:13:07,747
- Kew.
- Kill.
1352
01:13:07,842 --> 01:13:09,834
Will you get the "L" out?
Don't pronounce the "L."
1353
01:13:09,927 --> 01:13:10,963
- Kew.
- Kill.
1354
01:13:11,053 --> 01:13:12,510
A little... You gotta go...
1355
01:13:12,597 --> 01:13:14,133
K... Kew.
1356
01:13:17,935 --> 01:13:19,426
Kill.
1357
01:13:22,398 --> 01:13:24,481
Forget it. We'll try something else.
1358
01:13:26,527 --> 01:13:28,109
This is murder.
1359
01:13:28,195 --> 01:13:31,063
What kind of a job
did you get me I ask you?
1360
01:13:31,157 --> 01:13:32,819
I'm afraid it's useless.
1361
01:13:32,909 --> 01:13:34,650
What do you mean, it's useless?
1362
01:13:34,744 --> 01:13:36,701
I'll make you so funny
your only problem...
1363
01:13:36,787 --> 01:13:39,450
will be to get her to stop laughing long
enough to have babies.
1364
01:13:39,540 --> 01:13:43,159
No. Uh...
1365
01:13:43,252 --> 01:13:45,710
Show me what I can do with a woman.
1366
01:13:47,798 --> 01:13:50,381
After what I read about you,
I'm sure that you can show me.
1367
01:13:50,468 --> 01:13:52,926
No, no. I mean something comical.
1368
01:13:53,012 --> 01:13:55,299
Something... Something funny.
1369
01:13:55,389 --> 01:13:57,972
Oh. I thought you meant...
1370
01:13:58,059 --> 01:13:59,721
What you can do with... I have it.
1371
01:13:59,810 --> 01:14:01,893
I have a great boy-and-girl bit.
1372
01:14:01,979 --> 01:14:03,436
Let's step down here.
1373
01:14:03,522 --> 01:14:05,980
Look, in this scene I'll be the b...
I'll be the girl.
1374
01:14:06,067 --> 01:14:07,478
I'll be the girl, and you be the boy.
1375
01:14:07,568 --> 01:14:08,558
- Understand?
- Yes.
1376
01:14:08,653 --> 01:14:10,645
You're standing on a corner
and you're waiting for your girl,
1377
01:14:10,738 --> 01:14:12,730
and I want you to ad-lib a line,
like you're impatient.
1378
01:14:12,823 --> 01:14:14,439
"Where is my girl?
She's supposed to be here."
1379
01:14:14,533 --> 01:14:17,571
I'll be the girl, and I'll go off there
by the door and do it.
1380
01:14:17,662 --> 01:14:19,574
- Okay.
- All right. Let's try it.
1381
01:14:19,664 --> 01:14:21,326
No. Turn around. Face the audience.
1382
01:14:21,415 --> 01:14:23,156
That's the first thing you gotta learn,
Mr. Clement.
1383
01:14:23,250 --> 01:14:24,832
Look at the audience. Go ahead.
1384
01:14:24,919 --> 01:14:26,581
Look... Look at your watch.
1385
01:14:26,671 --> 01:14:28,663
- Okay.
- Go ahead.
1386
01:14:29,840 --> 01:14:34,130
Where is she?
She's supposed to meet me here.
1387
01:14:34,804 --> 01:14:36,921
Oh. She's late again.
1388
01:14:38,683 --> 01:14:40,174
That's very good.
1389
01:14:40,267 --> 01:14:42,805
Remember now, I'm the girl.
1390
01:14:42,895 --> 01:14:44,386
I'm the girl.
1391
01:14:44,480 --> 01:14:46,597
Hi.
1392
01:14:46,691 --> 01:14:48,182
I'm coming on.
1393
01:15:07,169 --> 01:15:10,207
And 40 million Americans call you "uncle"?
1394
01:15:25,855 --> 01:15:27,391
Milton Berle's here.
1395
01:15:27,481 --> 01:15:28,972
Right this way, Mr. Berle.
1396
01:15:29,066 --> 01:15:30,523
- Uncle Miltie.
- Milton Berle's here.
1397
01:15:30,609 --> 01:15:32,817
- Milton Berle's here.
- Uncle Miltie.
1398
01:15:36,157 --> 01:15:37,898
Hold it. Hold it.
1399
01:15:37,992 --> 01:15:39,858
Mr. Berle to see you, Mr. Welch.
1400
01:15:39,952 --> 01:15:41,614
Thank you.
1401
01:15:41,704 --> 01:15:43,570
- Hi, Milton.
- Hiya, Georgie.
1402
01:15:43,664 --> 01:15:45,621
- I didn't mean to stop the rehearsal.
- Not at all.
1403
01:15:45,708 --> 01:15:47,165
Do you know Mr. Coffman?
1404
01:15:47,251 --> 01:15:48,742
How do you do, Mr. Coffman?
1405
01:15:48,836 --> 01:15:50,623
This is my producer, Oliver Burton.
1406
01:15:50,713 --> 01:15:51,544
Glad to meet you, sir.
1407
01:15:51,630 --> 01:15:52,837
Mr. Berle,
I'm happy to meet you.
1408
01:15:52,923 --> 01:15:56,542
I had no idea Mr. Welch
knew any prominent theatrical people.
1409
01:15:56,635 --> 01:15:59,594
Oh, Georgie? You must be kidding.
One of my first sponsors.
1410
01:15:59,680 --> 01:16:01,296
On radio.
1411
01:16:01,390 --> 01:16:03,382
Why don't you hang around?
Watch a bit of the rehearsal.
1412
01:16:03,476 --> 01:16:04,466
I'd be very glad to.
1413
01:16:04,560 --> 01:16:06,426
We rarely get free advice
from people like you.
1414
01:16:06,520 --> 01:16:10,139
Oh, I just dropped by to pay my respects
to old Welchy boy here.
1415
01:16:10,232 --> 01:16:12,474
By the way,
as I was coming in just now,
1416
01:16:12,568 --> 01:16:15,106
I saw your comedian rehearsing.
1417
01:16:15,196 --> 01:16:16,858
Wonderful. I stopped to listen.
1418
01:16:16,947 --> 01:16:18,904
Professional curiosity, you know.
1419
01:16:18,991 --> 01:16:21,449
Boy, he was doing a funny routine.
1420
01:16:21,535 --> 01:16:24,152
Mr. Burton, I wanna tell you,
you have a great comedian on your hands.
1421
01:16:24,246 --> 01:16:26,363
Mr. Berle, you don't know
what that means to us...
1422
01:16:26,457 --> 01:16:29,120
to have someone like you compliment us.
1423
01:16:29,210 --> 01:16:32,078
Get Tony. He can use the encouragement.
1424
01:16:32,171 --> 01:16:34,083
Tony! Tony Danton.
1425
01:16:34,173 --> 01:16:36,790
Come on, fellas. Clear the stage.
1426
01:16:37,426 --> 01:16:38,837
Yeah, here I am.
1427
01:16:38,928 --> 01:16:41,386
- That's not him.
- It's not?
1428
01:16:41,472 --> 01:16:44,965
Tony, I want you to say hello
to Mr. Berle.
1429
01:16:45,059 --> 01:16:46,550
- Hi, Tony.
- Hello, Mr. Berle.
1430
01:16:46,644 --> 01:16:49,011
I just wanted you to meet him.
1431
01:16:50,773 --> 01:16:52,514
There's the fellow.
1432
01:16:56,904 --> 01:16:57,860
Him?
1433
01:16:57,947 --> 01:16:59,233
That's the one,
right there.
1434
01:17:03,702 --> 01:17:06,570
Oh, you... Come here, will ya?
1435
01:17:06,664 --> 01:17:08,121
No! I mean you.
1436
01:17:08,207 --> 01:17:09,664
Yes, you.
1437
01:17:14,755 --> 01:17:15,745
What's the matter?
1438
01:17:15,840 --> 01:17:17,456
Were you rehearsing
out there?
1439
01:17:18,676 --> 01:17:21,259
Oh, that.
Just a little skit I put together...
1440
01:17:21,345 --> 01:17:23,928
for a surprise party
we're giving a friend.
1441
01:17:24,014 --> 01:17:27,132
- It's not very funny.
- Milton Berle thinks it's funny.
1442
01:17:28,936 --> 01:17:31,098
Milton...
1443
01:17:31,188 --> 01:17:32,395
Why, really, Mr. Berle?
1444
01:17:32,481 --> 01:17:34,598
Yes. I think
it was just wonderful.
1445
01:17:34,692 --> 01:17:36,900
You're underestimating yourself, kid.
1446
01:17:36,986 --> 01:17:39,649
Uh, why don't you do the routine
for the gentlemen?
1447
01:17:39,738 --> 01:17:41,195
- Oh, no...
- All right.
1448
01:17:41,282 --> 01:17:42,614
Clear the stage.
1449
01:17:42,700 --> 01:17:44,191
Clear the stage.
1450
01:17:44,285 --> 01:17:45,776
Clear the stage off, huh, fellas?
1451
01:17:45,870 --> 01:17:47,953
Do the subway routine that I taught you.
1452
01:17:48,038 --> 01:17:49,700
It's the best bit that you do.
1453
01:18:00,551 --> 01:18:02,042
May I?
1454
01:18:11,812 --> 01:18:13,974
I'd like to give my impression...
1455
01:18:14,064 --> 01:18:17,057
of a man going to work
in the morning on the subway.
1456
01:18:19,528 --> 01:18:21,144
He's great. Great. Watch him.
1457
01:19:01,070 --> 01:19:02,936
He's beautiful!
1458
01:19:25,803 --> 01:19:28,011
Oh, he's great!
1459
01:19:34,061 --> 01:19:35,643
Beautiful!
1460
01:19:43,445 --> 01:19:44,435
Where is she?
1461
01:19:44,530 --> 01:19:46,613
She's supposed to meet me here.
1462
01:19:46,699 --> 01:19:48,907
Oh, she's late... again.
1463
01:20:28,365 --> 01:20:30,277
Oh, beautiful.
1464
01:20:30,367 --> 01:20:31,858
Beautiful!
1465
01:20:42,546 --> 01:20:45,835
It's the funniest thing
I've ever seen in my life!
1466
01:21:04,693 --> 01:21:07,276
They're gonna ask you to sign
for the run of the play.
1467
01:21:07,363 --> 01:21:08,353
What's that?
1468
01:21:08,447 --> 01:21:11,110
To stay with the show
as long as it runs.
1469
01:21:11,200 --> 01:21:13,908
But you're entitled to more money.
1470
01:21:15,371 --> 01:21:17,533
- Hey, you were good.
- Really?
1471
01:21:17,623 --> 01:21:20,240
Well, I've got to run along.
1472
01:21:20,334 --> 01:21:22,041
Very good, son. Lots of luck.
1473
01:21:22,127 --> 01:21:23,538
Thank you, Mr. Berle.
1474
01:21:23,629 --> 01:21:25,666
- Welchy, old boy. Bye-bye.
- Bye-bye.
1475
01:21:25,756 --> 01:21:27,122
- My regards to the family.
- I will.
1476
01:21:27,216 --> 01:21:28,832
- Remember me at home.
- Yes. Yes.
1477
01:21:28,926 --> 01:21:30,383
So long.
1478
01:21:30,469 --> 01:21:33,462
So long, kids. Happy show.
1479
01:21:33,555 --> 01:21:35,968
Thank you, Milton Berle.
1480
01:21:37,851 --> 01:21:39,433
We have to sign him
right now.
1481
01:21:39,520 --> 01:21:40,510
Certainly.
1482
01:21:40,604 --> 01:21:41,640
What's his name?
1483
01:21:41,730 --> 01:21:43,437
Al... Alphonse,
I think.
1484
01:21:43,524 --> 01:21:45,015
Oh, fella?
1485
01:21:45,109 --> 01:21:46,475
Step over here, will ya?
1486
01:21:47,111 --> 01:21:50,149
I'll ask for a hundred-dollar raise.
1487
01:21:50,239 --> 01:21:52,982
I wouldn't dare ask for more than 30.
1488
01:21:53,075 --> 01:21:55,692
But... go ahead.
1489
01:21:55,786 --> 01:21:57,277
Don't be shy.
1490
01:22:00,249 --> 01:22:02,787
Nobody talk. Let me handle this.
1491
01:22:03,877 --> 01:22:05,493
Yes, sir?
1492
01:22:05,587 --> 01:22:07,123
That wasn't bad.
1493
01:22:07,214 --> 01:22:10,503
- Thank you, sir.
- Say, I'm sorry, but what is your name?
1494
01:22:10,592 --> 01:22:12,879
Dumas. Alex Dumas.
1495
01:22:12,970 --> 01:22:14,757
You don't say.
1496
01:22:14,847 --> 01:22:16,634
Alex, I think we can use your bit.
1497
01:22:16,723 --> 01:22:19,261
I'm not promising now.
We may be over length.
1498
01:22:19,351 --> 01:22:21,843
Kerry, I wanna give Dumas here
a $10 increase.
1499
01:22:21,937 --> 01:22:22,927
Very well, sir.
1500
01:22:23,021 --> 01:22:25,058
Have him sign the usual
run-of-the-play contract.
1501
01:22:25,149 --> 01:22:26,139
Right.
1502
01:22:26,233 --> 01:22:27,974
Not bad, eh, Alex?
1503
01:22:29,278 --> 01:22:31,440
A $10 jump.
1504
01:22:31,530 --> 01:22:33,817
I don't think that's enough, Mr. Burton.
1505
01:22:36,201 --> 01:22:37,908
I wonder if I heard you right.
1506
01:22:37,995 --> 01:22:39,452
- I think so.
- I don't.
1507
01:22:39,538 --> 01:22:41,951
Well, I'd like $50 more.
1508
01:22:43,792 --> 01:22:45,658
Where did you get that absurd idea?
1509
01:22:45,752 --> 01:22:47,493
Milton Berle was laughing.
1510
01:22:47,588 --> 01:22:49,500
He was just being polite.
1511
01:22:49,590 --> 01:22:52,799
Now look, Dumas,
you're new in show business.
1512
01:22:52,885 --> 01:22:55,753
A $50 raise is unheard of. Ask anybody.
1513
01:22:55,846 --> 01:22:57,838
I would like $50 more.
1514
01:22:57,931 --> 01:22:59,923
It's out of the question!
1515
01:23:00,017 --> 01:23:03,055
Here, uh, Amanda. Tell him, will ya?
1516
01:23:03,145 --> 01:23:04,932
He wants a $50 raise.
1517
01:23:05,022 --> 01:23:06,479
Come over here, dear.
1518
01:23:10,694 --> 01:23:14,938
You don't realize, Dumas, this isn't a big
business. You can't expect...
1519
01:23:15,032 --> 01:23:17,069
I'm offering him a $10 raise.
1520
01:23:17,159 --> 01:23:18,821
Isn't that fair?
1521
01:23:18,911 --> 01:23:21,403
Don't ask me. I'm not a...
1522
01:23:21,497 --> 01:23:23,580
Honey, the fella's just beginning.
1523
01:23:23,665 --> 01:23:26,624
This is his first big part.
He's getting a terrific opportunity.
1524
01:23:27,711 --> 01:23:30,624
I-I know, but, well...
1525
01:23:30,714 --> 01:23:34,082
He only got the part because he happens
to look like Clement.
1526
01:23:34,176 --> 01:23:36,793
That's not such an opportunity.
1527
01:23:36,887 --> 01:23:39,300
Did you tell him to ask for 50?
1528
01:23:39,389 --> 01:23:41,847
No. Uh...
1529
01:23:41,934 --> 01:23:43,516
But, 40's...
1530
01:23:43,602 --> 01:23:45,434
Have you lost your mind?
Forty?
1531
01:23:45,521 --> 01:23:47,979
There is no need to shout at her.
1532
01:23:48,065 --> 01:23:50,808
Don't tell me how to run my company,
will ya?
1533
01:23:50,901 --> 01:23:52,858
You've no right to talk to her that way.
1534
01:23:52,945 --> 01:23:54,777
Will you take $10, or won't you?
1535
01:23:54,863 --> 01:23:56,399
I certainly will not.
1536
01:23:56,490 --> 01:23:58,982
Then you're fired.
Please leave this theater.
1537
01:23:59,076 --> 01:24:01,568
- Am I fired?
- What? No.
1538
01:24:01,662 --> 01:24:05,246
- What?
- He's a partner. He likes me.
1539
01:24:05,332 --> 01:24:06,789
- I like him.
- See?
1540
01:24:06,875 --> 01:24:10,084
But I don't, and I want him out of
the show. Now get outta here.
1541
01:24:10,170 --> 01:24:12,708
Your 49% wants him out of the show,
1542
01:24:12,798 --> 01:24:15,666
but my 51 wants him in,
so he stays in, doesn't he?
1543
01:24:15,759 --> 01:24:17,842
I'll settle the money question.
1544
01:24:17,928 --> 01:24:19,760
Come with me, young man.
1545
01:24:25,018 --> 01:24:26,475
What do we do now?
1546
01:24:26,562 --> 01:24:27,928
I get $50 raise.
1547
01:24:28,021 --> 01:24:30,138
When you get excited,
you're just like your father.
1548
01:24:30,232 --> 01:24:32,269
And she gets $50 raise.
1549
01:24:32,359 --> 01:24:34,692
What for? What's the purpose of that?
1550
01:24:34,778 --> 01:24:36,940
Écoutez. L'incident est clos.
1551
01:24:38,323 --> 01:24:40,565
Same sentence his father used to use.
1552
01:24:45,872 --> 01:24:49,036
He gets a $50 raise,
and she gets a $50 raise.
1553
01:24:49,126 --> 01:24:51,584
What? What for?
1554
01:24:51,670 --> 01:24:54,128
Écoutez. L'incident est clos.
1555
01:24:54,214 --> 01:24:56,957
- Start the rehearsal.
- Yes, sir.
1556
01:24:57,050 --> 01:24:59,463
Okay, Amanda, You wanna get to wardrobe
for "Let's Make Love."
1557
01:24:59,553 --> 01:25:02,296
Dress rehearsal... "Let's Make Love."
1558
01:25:05,142 --> 01:25:06,633
May I help you?
1559
01:25:06,727 --> 01:25:10,186
Boy, you sure got a lot
of different sides to your character.
1560
01:25:19,489 --> 01:25:21,572
♪ Oh, the gentle art
of conversation ♪
1561
01:25:21,658 --> 01:25:25,572
♪ Is deader than
the Dead Sea Scrolls ♪
1562
01:25:25,662 --> 01:25:28,325
♪ We've become the mutest
kind of nation ♪
1563
01:25:28,415 --> 01:25:32,409
♪ We're uncommunicating souls ♪
1564
01:25:32,502 --> 01:25:36,587
♪ No one talks
No one talks ♪
1565
01:25:36,673 --> 01:25:39,962
♪ It's something
we seldom ever do ♪
1566
01:25:40,052 --> 01:25:44,262
♪ No one talks
No one talks ♪
1567
01:25:48,185 --> 01:25:51,929
♪ No one talks but ♪
1568
01:25:52,022 --> 01:25:53,479
♪ You ♪
1569
01:26:08,497 --> 01:26:10,989
♪ Here we sit ♪
1570
01:26:11,083 --> 01:26:12,790
♪ And we chatter ♪
1571
01:26:12,876 --> 01:26:17,371
♪ What are we thinking of ♪
1572
01:26:17,464 --> 01:26:19,831
♪ Let's not make ♪
1573
01:26:19,925 --> 01:26:22,212
♪ With the patter ♪
1574
01:26:22,302 --> 01:26:24,385
♪ Baby ♪
1575
01:26:25,389 --> 01:26:27,005
♪ Let's make love ♪
1576
01:26:27,099 --> 01:26:29,261
♪ My, oh, my ♪
1577
01:26:29,351 --> 01:26:31,138
♪ But it's stifling ♪
1578
01:26:31,228 --> 01:26:34,016
♪ If you roar ♪
1579
01:26:34,106 --> 01:26:35,847
♪ Like a lion ♪
1580
01:26:35,941 --> 01:26:38,558
♪ I could coo ♪
1581
01:26:38,652 --> 01:26:40,484
♪ Like a dove ♪
1582
01:26:40,570 --> 01:26:42,903
♪ If you're sold ♪
1583
01:26:42,989 --> 01:26:44,855
♪ Begin buyin' ♪
1584
01:26:44,950 --> 01:26:46,441
♪ Baby ♪
1585
01:26:48,370 --> 01:26:49,656
♪ Let's make love ♪
1586
01:26:49,746 --> 01:26:51,863
♪ Gosh, it's hot ♪
1587
01:26:51,957 --> 01:26:55,496
♪ No, don't turn TV ♪
1588
01:26:55,585 --> 01:26:56,917
♪ On ♪
1589
01:26:57,003 --> 01:27:00,917
♪ Instead just turn me on ♪
1590
01:27:01,007 --> 01:27:03,590
♪ I light up like ♪
1591
01:27:04,803 --> 01:27:06,419
♪ Neon ♪
1592
01:27:06,513 --> 01:27:09,677
♪ Just a tiny section
of your affection ♪
1593
01:27:09,766 --> 01:27:12,133
♪ In my direction
will do ♪
1594
01:27:12,227 --> 01:27:13,217
Ooh!
1595
01:27:33,832 --> 01:27:36,540
♪ You'll just love ♪
1596
01:27:36,626 --> 01:27:38,492
♪ My embraces ♪
1597
01:27:38,587 --> 01:27:41,125
♪ 'Cause they'll fit ♪
1598
01:27:41,214 --> 01:27:43,001
♪ Like a glove ♪
1599
01:27:43,091 --> 01:27:45,583
♪ We could get ♪
1600
01:27:45,677 --> 01:27:47,384
♪ Down to cases ♪
1601
01:27:47,471 --> 01:27:49,713
♪ Maybe ♪
1602
01:27:50,891 --> 01:27:54,430
♪ Kiss me, baby ♪
1603
01:27:55,437 --> 01:27:58,020
♪ Let's make love ♪
1604
01:28:04,321 --> 01:28:07,814
♪ Plan some moonlight trips with me ♪
1605
01:28:07,908 --> 01:28:10,070
♪ Come to grips with me ♪
1606
01:28:10,160 --> 01:28:12,573
♪ Lips to lips with me ♪
1607
01:28:12,662 --> 01:28:14,403
♪ Do
Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
1608
01:28:14,498 --> 01:28:17,241
♪ You'll just love ♪
1609
01:28:17,334 --> 01:28:19,121
♪ My embraces ♪
1610
01:28:19,211 --> 01:28:21,749
♪ 'Cause they'll fit ♪
1611
01:28:21,838 --> 01:28:23,670
♪ Like a glove ♪
1612
01:28:23,757 --> 01:28:26,249
♪ We could get ♪
1613
01:28:26,343 --> 01:28:28,084
♪ Down to cases ♪
1614
01:28:28,178 --> 01:28:31,421
♪ Maybe ♪
1615
01:28:31,515 --> 01:28:35,885
♪ Kiss me, baby ♪
1616
01:28:35,977 --> 01:28:37,218
♪ Let's make love ♪
1617
01:28:37,312 --> 01:28:39,520
♪ My, oh, my ♪
1618
01:28:39,606 --> 01:28:42,223
- ♪ But it's warm here ♪
- ♪ Let's make love ♪
1619
01:28:42,317 --> 01:28:46,436
- ♪ I sure wore a tight collar ♪
- ♪ Let's make love ♪
1620
01:28:46,530 --> 01:28:48,772
- ♪ I may need ♪
- Mmm.
1621
01:28:48,865 --> 01:28:50,447
♪ A salt tablet ♪
1622
01:28:50,534 --> 01:28:52,992
♪ Do you know ♪
1623
01:28:53,078 --> 01:28:55,411
♪ A good doctor ♪
1624
01:28:56,998 --> 01:28:58,489
♪ Let's ♪
1625
01:29:01,753 --> 01:29:04,211
♪ Make love ♪♪
1626
01:29:09,636 --> 01:29:12,845
If you're getting anywhere,
my boy, it's much too slow.
1627
01:29:12,931 --> 01:29:15,014
I feel it.
1628
01:29:15,100 --> 01:29:17,057
I know it.
1629
01:29:17,143 --> 01:29:21,012
I could learn to sing,
and that will do it.
1630
01:29:21,106 --> 01:29:22,597
He could be right.
1631
01:29:22,691 --> 01:29:25,434
Between comedians and singers,
women always go for singers.
1632
01:29:25,527 --> 01:29:28,486
I know. When I was younger,
I appeared in a lot of Broadway shows.
1633
01:29:28,572 --> 01:29:30,438
Some romantic baritone would come along,
1634
01:29:30,532 --> 01:29:33,149
and the girls would start breathing hard.
1635
01:29:33,243 --> 01:29:36,202
Boy, if I had my life to live over again,
I'd be a singer.
1636
01:29:36,288 --> 01:29:38,154
You want another teacher?
1637
01:29:38,248 --> 01:29:40,080
- I'll call one.
- But the best.
1638
01:29:41,167 --> 01:29:43,284
The guy that I have in mind
is the greatest.
1639
01:29:43,378 --> 01:29:44,835
Hello. Operator?
1640
01:29:49,926 --> 01:29:51,542
Oh, good morning, Mr. Crosby.
1641
01:29:51,636 --> 01:29:55,380
Mr. Clement's expecting you.
Will you step this way, please?
1642
01:29:55,473 --> 01:29:57,840
Give me a little run
on the piano there, Walter.
1643
01:29:59,185 --> 01:30:01,848
Écoutez. Commençons.
1644
01:30:01,938 --> 01:30:04,396
♪ I'm susceptible to stars ♪
1645
01:30:04,482 --> 01:30:07,099
♪ In the skies ♪
1646
01:30:07,193 --> 01:30:10,186
♪ I'm susceptible to stars
in the skies ♪
1647
01:30:10,280 --> 01:30:12,693
No, you wanna take that dip down there.
That's where the money is.
1648
01:30:12,782 --> 01:30:16,526
♪ I'm susceptible to stars
in the skies ♪
1649
01:30:16,620 --> 01:30:18,077
Let me hear it.
1650
01:30:18,163 --> 01:30:21,247
♪ I'm susceptible to stars
in the skies ♪
1651
01:30:21,333 --> 01:30:22,369
Good.
1652
01:30:22,459 --> 01:30:25,702
♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1653
01:30:27,005 --> 01:30:28,792
♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1654
01:30:28,882 --> 01:30:30,589
No, romantic's a very big word.
1655
01:30:30,675 --> 01:30:32,962
You want to lay on that.
Baste it with a lot of schmaltz.
1656
01:30:33,053 --> 01:30:36,467
♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1657
01:30:37,515 --> 01:30:40,508
♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1658
01:30:40,602 --> 01:30:42,559
That's good. That's fine.
1659
01:30:42,646 --> 01:30:43,932
- ♪ Romantic ♪
- Yes.
1660
01:30:44,022 --> 01:30:45,934
- ♪ Ba, ba, ba, ba ♪
- Oh, no, no, no.
1661
01:30:46,024 --> 01:30:48,858
Don't do that around here.
You'll get arrested now.
1662
01:30:48,944 --> 01:30:51,857
♪ If they're told to me
all covered with sighs ♪
1663
01:30:51,947 --> 01:30:54,064
♪ The wildest of lies
seem true ♪
1664
01:30:54,157 --> 01:30:56,524
You see, you run it
all together like that. Keep it moving.
1665
01:30:56,618 --> 01:30:58,484
- All of it?
- The whole thing.
1666
01:30:58,578 --> 01:31:00,695
- The breath.
- You and I will know you're out of breath,
1667
01:31:00,789 --> 01:31:03,702
but she'll think it's very sexy, you see?
1668
01:31:03,792 --> 01:31:05,078
Let me hear it.
1669
01:31:06,044 --> 01:31:07,034
♪ If they're ♪
1670
01:31:07,128 --> 01:31:09,336
♪ If they're told to me
all covered with sighs ♪
1671
01:31:09,422 --> 01:31:11,584
- ♪ The wildest of lies ♪
- Now a big breath.
1672
01:31:11,675 --> 01:31:14,042
♪ Seem true ♪
1673
01:31:14,135 --> 01:31:16,468
Oh, that's reeking with sex. Believe me.
1674
01:31:16,554 --> 01:31:19,092
♪ Each time
a lovebird sings ♪
1675
01:31:19,182 --> 01:31:20,673
You see, that's showmanship.
1676
01:31:20,767 --> 01:31:22,133
Keeps her mind off your voice.
1677
01:31:22,227 --> 01:31:24,310
♪ Each time
a lovebird sings ♪
1678
01:31:24,396 --> 01:31:26,137
♪ Each time
a lovebird sings ♪
1679
01:31:27,691 --> 01:31:29,603
- Can you whistle?
- Yes, but the...
1680
01:31:29,693 --> 01:31:32,686
It might be too tricky. It might summon
a lot of wildfowl, I guess.
1681
01:31:32,779 --> 01:31:34,315
♪ I have no defenses ♪
1682
01:31:34,406 --> 01:31:35,942
♪ I have no defenses ♪
1683
01:31:36,032 --> 01:31:37,898
♪ My heart is off on wings ♪
1684
01:31:37,993 --> 01:31:39,109
♪ My heart is... ♪
1685
01:31:39,202 --> 01:31:42,445
♪ Along with my senses ♪
1686
01:31:42,539 --> 01:31:44,952
- ♪ I'm a setup for the moon ♪
- ♪ I'm a setup for the moon ♪
1687
01:31:45,041 --> 01:31:46,953
♪ When it's bright ♪
1688
01:31:47,043 --> 01:31:49,956
♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1689
01:31:50,046 --> 01:31:52,038
- ♪ If they're told... ♪♪
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
1690
01:31:52,132 --> 01:31:54,294
Better rest. Save your voice.
1691
01:31:56,469 --> 01:31:59,428
Gee, I hope you kiss better than
you can sing, or you're out of business.
1692
01:31:59,514 --> 01:32:02,257
- No good, huh?
- Now, if we get you to move a little...
1693
01:32:02,350 --> 01:32:05,434
Dance. Do you dance?
1694
01:32:05,520 --> 01:32:08,012
- No.
- No dance, huh?
1695
01:32:08,106 --> 01:32:10,723
Wait a minute.
I think I can swing it for you.
1696
01:32:16,948 --> 01:32:18,940
If I can catch this guy,
boy, you're a cinch.
1697
01:32:28,543 --> 01:32:30,159
Right, Mr. Kelly?
1698
01:32:30,253 --> 01:32:34,167
Well, the feet are right, Mr. Clement,
but we'll have to work on the style.
1699
01:32:34,257 --> 01:32:35,464
On the style?
1700
01:32:35,550 --> 01:32:38,463
Yeah.
You-You'll have to, uh... to think...
1701
01:32:38,553 --> 01:32:43,093
I should say... Look, you must express
yourself the way an actor does.
1702
01:32:43,183 --> 01:32:44,424
- Actor?
- Yes.
1703
01:32:44,517 --> 01:32:48,181
You see, a dancer expresses
with his body...
1704
01:32:48,271 --> 01:32:49,933
what an actor does with words.
1705
01:32:50,023 --> 01:32:51,559
- It's not just the feet.
- Right.
1706
01:32:51,649 --> 01:32:53,311
You... This dance is what?
1707
01:32:53,401 --> 01:32:55,438
It's romance, it's a courtship,
1708
01:32:55,528 --> 01:32:57,770
and you have to say that with your body.
1709
01:32:57,864 --> 01:32:58,945
You have to...
1710
01:33:01,409 --> 01:33:04,902
You say, "Darling, I love you."
1711
01:33:05,997 --> 01:33:06,987
I see.
1712
01:33:07,082 --> 01:33:09,074
You see,
you must think that as you dance.
1713
01:33:09,167 --> 01:33:11,204
Good. I'll try.
1714
01:33:11,961 --> 01:33:13,748
- Darling.
- Yes?
1715
01:33:13,838 --> 01:33:16,171
- I love you.
- Good.
1716
01:33:16,257 --> 01:33:17,623
Oh, darling...
1717
01:33:23,056 --> 01:33:24,672
I'll try again.
1718
01:33:26,226 --> 01:33:27,342
Darling,
1719
01:33:28,269 --> 01:33:29,635
I love you.
1720
01:33:30,271 --> 01:33:31,933
I love you, darling.
1721
01:33:44,077 --> 01:33:46,194
On the double, everyone.
Come on. Over to the piano.
1722
01:33:46,287 --> 01:33:47,323
This is gonna be good news.
1723
01:33:47,413 --> 01:33:49,575
We're gonna
run through a new number.
1724
01:33:51,668 --> 01:33:53,660
Come on, kids. Let's go.
1725
01:34:07,016 --> 01:34:10,930
♪ I'm susceptible
to stars ♪
1726
01:34:11,020 --> 01:34:13,262
Wait a minute. I'm sorry.
He's not going to sing it.
1727
01:34:13,356 --> 01:34:14,767
I brought this number for Dumas.
1728
01:34:14,858 --> 01:34:16,440
- Dumas?
- Yes. Yes, of course.
1729
01:34:16,526 --> 01:34:21,237
I'm so sorry. Miss Dell, would you be
so kind as to try it with Mr. Dumas?
1730
01:34:30,039 --> 01:34:32,122
Well, this is a surprise.
1731
01:34:32,208 --> 01:34:33,699
Let's go, kids.
1732
01:34:35,753 --> 01:34:38,336
- I hope I didn't ruin it for you.
- It's not your fault.
1733
01:34:38,423 --> 01:34:40,255
Kids, this is a very expensive number.
1734
01:34:40,341 --> 01:34:43,800
Let's do it proud.
1735
01:34:46,556 --> 01:34:51,676
♪ I'm susceptible to stars
in the skies ♪
1736
01:34:51,769 --> 01:34:55,308
♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1737
01:34:56,608 --> 01:35:00,227
♪ If they're told to me
all covered with sighs ♪
1738
01:35:00,320 --> 01:35:02,437
♪ The wildest of lies ♪
1739
01:35:02,530 --> 01:35:04,738
♪ Seem true ♪
1740
01:35:05,909 --> 01:35:09,528
♪ Each time
a lovebird sings ♪
1741
01:35:10,371 --> 01:35:13,660
♪ I have no defenses ♪
1742
01:35:13,750 --> 01:35:17,664
♪ My heart is off on wings ♪
1743
01:35:17,754 --> 01:35:19,336
♪ Along with my... ♪
1744
01:35:19,422 --> 01:35:22,586
The spirit of this song
is intimacy. Real intimacy.
1745
01:35:22,675 --> 01:35:24,712
- ♪ I'm a setup for the moon ♪
- Put your arms around him.
1746
01:35:24,802 --> 01:35:26,464
- ♪ When it's bright ♪
- Closer to him.
1747
01:35:26,554 --> 01:35:29,342
- Drape yourself over him.
- ♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1748
01:35:29,432 --> 01:35:31,139
Melt together.
1749
01:35:31,226 --> 01:35:33,183
- ♪ And I shouldn't be allowed ♪
- Your mouth... Closer to his cheek.
1750
01:35:33,269 --> 01:35:35,306
- ♪ Out at night ♪
- Kiss him. Just a small one.
1751
01:35:35,396 --> 01:35:39,766
- ♪ With anyone quite like you ♪
- Now another. Good.
1752
01:35:39,859 --> 01:35:43,978
- ♪ But, oh, your arms are nice ♪
- Now nuzzle him.
1753
01:35:44,072 --> 01:35:48,612
♪ And it would be awfully nice ♪
1754
01:35:49,202 --> 01:35:50,693
Uh...
1755
01:35:51,537 --> 01:35:53,119
Hold it.
1756
01:35:53,206 --> 01:35:55,072
What's the matter?
1757
01:35:57,252 --> 01:35:59,118
- Matter?
- You're freezing.
1758
01:36:00,255 --> 01:36:01,837
Just relax.
1759
01:36:03,132 --> 01:36:05,875
- I'm sorry. I...
- You've met Miss Dell, haven't you?
1760
01:36:05,969 --> 01:36:08,586
- Yes, I have.
- Well, let her get at you.
1761
01:36:10,473 --> 01:36:12,681
- All right.
- Until your last line.
1762
01:36:12,767 --> 01:36:17,057
Then you kiss her... Strong. Mean it.
1763
01:36:17,146 --> 01:36:19,058
Make her know it.
1764
01:36:19,148 --> 01:36:21,140
You can do that, can't you?
1765
01:36:22,360 --> 01:36:23,976
I'll try my very best.
1766
01:36:25,822 --> 01:36:27,734
Well, let's start again.
1767
01:36:30,910 --> 01:36:35,746
♪ But, oh
Your arms are nice ♪
1768
01:36:35,832 --> 01:36:39,872
♪ And it would be
awfully nice ♪
1769
01:36:41,129 --> 01:36:46,249
♪ If you turned out to be ♪
1770
01:36:46,342 --> 01:36:52,134
♪ Starry-eyed like me ♪
1771
01:36:52,932 --> 01:36:55,015
♪ And ♪
1772
01:36:56,394 --> 01:36:59,057
♪ Incurably ♪
1773
01:37:00,356 --> 01:37:03,349
♪ Romantic ♪
1774
01:37:04,527 --> 01:37:07,691
♪ Too ♪♪
1775
01:37:10,700 --> 01:37:13,238
That's not bad.
You've got the general idea.
1776
01:37:13,328 --> 01:37:15,365
We'll rehearse the rest again later.
1777
01:37:29,635 --> 01:37:31,672
Well, now we're getting somewhere.
1778
01:37:36,017 --> 01:37:38,350
May I take you to dinner tonight?
1779
01:37:38,436 --> 01:37:40,519
We're rehearsing tonight.
1780
01:37:40,605 --> 01:37:43,313
I've never met
such a difficult girl to feed.
1781
01:37:48,404 --> 01:37:50,396
You know what this stuff does to you.
1782
01:37:50,490 --> 01:37:53,528
You tryin' to kill yourself?
Is this what I sat up nights with you for?
1783
01:37:53,618 --> 01:37:55,405
With cold towels on your head?
1784
01:37:55,495 --> 01:37:58,408
Everybody said I was crazy to hire you,
but I believed. I believed.
1785
01:37:58,498 --> 01:38:00,911
And look what you're trying
to do to yourself!
1786
01:38:01,000 --> 01:38:02,787
Don't yell at him.
1787
01:38:03,795 --> 01:38:05,912
He's starting with this again.
1788
01:38:06,964 --> 01:38:09,798
- Don't! Give me that.
- Tony, stop.
1789
01:38:09,884 --> 01:38:11,716
You don't need that stuff anymore.
1790
01:38:11,803 --> 01:38:14,341
Come on now.
Just because you had a tough break...
1791
01:38:14,430 --> 01:38:18,014
No! No, kid. It's normal... for me.
1792
01:38:18,101 --> 01:38:20,218
I see it all now.
1793
01:38:20,311 --> 01:38:22,724
Three shows on the road before this,
I had great numbers.
1794
01:38:22,814 --> 01:38:25,227
All three closed out of town.
1795
01:38:25,316 --> 01:38:27,353
I did my job. Everybody said I was great.
1796
01:38:27,443 --> 01:38:29,184
Nobody gets to see me.
1797
01:38:29,278 --> 01:38:31,645
Well, now, finally I got the message.
I've had it.
1798
01:38:31,739 --> 01:38:34,152
- But it's not your fault.
- That's just it.
1799
01:38:34,242 --> 01:38:36,529
Forget it, Mandy. I want out.
1800
01:38:37,412 --> 01:38:38,948
How do you get out?
1801
01:38:39,038 --> 01:38:40,654
You say "I quit"? That's not out.
1802
01:38:41,290 --> 01:38:44,078
Tony, you're an actor,
so wherever you go, whatever you do...
1803
01:38:44,168 --> 01:38:45,704
Yeah, how do you leave it behind?
1804
01:38:46,712 --> 01:38:48,328
No.
1805
01:38:48,423 --> 01:38:50,380
I don't leave it behind.
1806
01:38:50,466 --> 01:38:53,004
Look, I know I can do the number
better than he can.
1807
01:38:53,094 --> 01:38:54,710
All I'm asking for is a chance.
1808
01:38:54,804 --> 01:38:58,138
I'm entitled to show them what I can do
with it, but they won't even give me that.
1809
01:38:59,642 --> 01:39:02,055
It's not fair.
He should have had a chance at the number.
1810
01:39:02,145 --> 01:39:03,477
He's entitled to that.
1811
01:39:03,563 --> 01:39:05,179
That backer won't listen.
What can I do?
1812
01:39:05,273 --> 01:39:07,105
What can you do?
How about trying to make him listen?
1813
01:39:07,191 --> 01:39:09,353
- Look, I believe you deserve...
- If you believe it, then do it!
1814
01:39:09,444 --> 01:39:12,107
How? He's got control now.
1815
01:39:13,448 --> 01:39:16,907
I'll go out to dinner with Alex.
I'll keep him out for an extra half hour.
1816
01:39:16,993 --> 01:39:20,077
Meantime, Tony,
you can show Mr. Welch what you can do.
1817
01:39:20,163 --> 01:39:22,906
Honey, how do I get the man to listen?
1818
01:39:22,999 --> 01:39:26,413
How? Put him on the stage
as soon as I leave.
1819
01:39:26,502 --> 01:39:29,085
The man's not gonna walk out of
the theater. He's gotta listen.
1820
01:39:29,172 --> 01:39:30,959
I can use Lily. She knows the song.
1821
01:39:31,048 --> 01:39:32,914
- Good.
- All right.
1822
01:39:33,009 --> 01:39:34,625
We'll give it a try.
1823
01:39:34,719 --> 01:39:36,381
Come on, now.
1824
01:39:47,273 --> 01:39:50,186
An old Chinese toast would be appropriate.
1825
01:40:02,163 --> 01:40:04,871
"May our children like each other."
1826
01:40:04,957 --> 01:40:07,290
Is that all? The Chinese is longer.
1827
01:40:07,376 --> 01:40:09,959
"Or else we'll have a noisy home."
1828
01:40:14,300 --> 01:40:16,542
How many languages do you speak?
1829
01:40:17,678 --> 01:40:19,214
Five or six.
1830
01:40:20,515 --> 01:40:23,553
Listen, don't worry about the check.
We'll go halves, okay?
1831
01:40:24,727 --> 01:40:26,468
Thank you very much,
1832
01:40:26,562 --> 01:40:29,270
but I have quite enough to pay for this.
1833
01:40:30,650 --> 01:40:32,266
I am very happy, Amanda.
1834
01:40:32,360 --> 01:40:35,478
I understand tonight why I was born.
1835
01:40:35,571 --> 01:40:37,062
That's nice.
1836
01:40:38,074 --> 01:40:40,657
Um, couldn't you get a better job,
1837
01:40:40,743 --> 01:40:42,405
speaking all those languages?
1838
01:40:42,495 --> 01:40:44,908
Someday you must go to France.
1839
01:40:44,997 --> 01:40:46,829
This time of year the sky over Paris...
1840
01:40:46,916 --> 01:40:49,203
is exactly the color of your eyes.
1841
01:40:52,255 --> 01:40:54,247
Do you mind if I say something personal?
1842
01:40:54,340 --> 01:40:56,206
Not at all.
1843
01:40:56,300 --> 01:40:58,838
Maybe you're not ambitious enough.
1844
01:40:58,928 --> 01:41:01,636
Because now that I know you...
1845
01:41:02,682 --> 01:41:06,972
For instance, the United Nations,
or, uh, the State Department.
1846
01:41:07,061 --> 01:41:08,677
They could use you, I bet.
1847
01:41:08,771 --> 01:41:12,264
Or some big business where you deal
with people from all over.
1848
01:41:12,358 --> 01:41:14,441
You have a way about you, you know.
1849
01:41:14,527 --> 01:41:16,018
What way?
1850
01:41:16,112 --> 01:41:20,152
Well, not elegant, exactly,
but kind of, um,
1851
01:41:20,241 --> 01:41:21,277
dignified.
1852
01:41:21,909 --> 01:41:25,823
I say it because every once in a while,
I can't place you.
1853
01:41:26,706 --> 01:41:28,698
I think that's because
you're in the wrong line of work.
1854
01:41:30,459 --> 01:41:32,416
Have you always been a jewelry salesman?
1855
01:41:33,045 --> 01:41:36,129
No. Not always.
1856
01:41:38,801 --> 01:41:40,633
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry.
1857
01:41:40,720 --> 01:41:43,133
Please, don't be uneasy.
1858
01:41:44,390 --> 01:41:46,632
It's all right. Let's have some more wine.
1859
01:41:46,726 --> 01:41:48,092
Amanda, I'm in love with you.
1860
01:41:50,187 --> 01:41:51,268
Now, Alex...
1861
01:41:51,355 --> 01:41:53,722
I've never said this in my life.
1862
01:41:54,984 --> 01:41:56,771
Amanda, I want to marry you.
1863
01:41:58,696 --> 01:42:00,562
Alex...
1864
01:42:00,656 --> 01:42:02,272
What do you say to me?
1865
01:42:04,785 --> 01:42:06,492
Then you're not married?
1866
01:42:06,579 --> 01:42:09,697
Married? Why did you think...
1867
01:42:09,790 --> 01:42:13,283
You never said anything about yourself,
so what was I to think?
1868
01:42:13,377 --> 01:42:16,711
I'm not married,
and have never been married.
1869
01:42:16,797 --> 01:42:19,631
Darling, only your feeling is important.
1870
01:42:20,843 --> 01:42:22,709
What do you feel for me?
1871
01:42:22,803 --> 01:42:24,760
- I must know that.
- Was it something terrible?
1872
01:42:25,514 --> 01:42:27,096
What are you imagining?
1873
01:42:27,183 --> 01:42:30,426
Well, I...
I've done some things in my life...
1874
01:42:30,519 --> 01:42:33,182
it's very painful to talk about.
1875
01:42:33,272 --> 01:42:34,353
No.
1876
01:42:34,940 --> 01:42:36,181
No, darling.
1877
01:42:37,068 --> 01:42:39,025
But people have to trust each other.
1878
01:42:39,111 --> 01:42:42,070
Darling, I do trust you
more than anyone in my life.
1879
01:42:42,823 --> 01:42:45,190
And now I will tell you everything.
1880
01:42:47,370 --> 01:42:49,282
What is it?
1881
01:42:49,372 --> 01:42:51,034
I have to apologize.
1882
01:42:51,123 --> 01:42:53,615
Here I am asking you to trust me,
and all this time...
1883
01:42:53,709 --> 01:42:55,621
I'm playing an awful, dirty trick on you.
1884
01:42:55,711 --> 01:42:57,122
Me?
1885
01:42:57,963 --> 01:43:01,297
I brought you here
to give Tony his chance at your number.
1886
01:43:04,303 --> 01:43:07,296
- I see.
- He's doing it for Mr. Welch now.
1887
01:43:09,141 --> 01:43:12,009
- We can go if you like.
- Of course, if you like.
1888
01:43:14,230 --> 01:43:17,223
I am very sorry
that I came into your life too late.
1889
01:43:18,818 --> 01:43:20,434
I hope you'll be very happy.
1890
01:43:21,445 --> 01:43:23,562
Oh, I didn't mean that.
1891
01:43:23,656 --> 01:43:26,023
I only wanted Tony to have his chance.
1892
01:43:26,117 --> 01:43:30,157
Acting for you is just an extra job,
but for him, it's his life.
1893
01:43:30,246 --> 01:43:32,078
Please, darling, sit down.
1894
01:43:32,915 --> 01:43:34,702
Sit down.
1895
01:43:34,792 --> 01:43:37,079
I hope you're not mad,
because I like you, Alex.
1896
01:43:38,921 --> 01:43:40,412
You do?
1897
01:43:41,465 --> 01:43:43,297
Oh, my darling girl, marry me.
1898
01:43:43,884 --> 01:43:45,125
I adore you.
1899
01:43:45,219 --> 01:43:46,209
But...
1900
01:43:46,303 --> 01:43:49,137
Very well. I won't torture you any longer.
1901
01:43:50,015 --> 01:43:52,098
I am not a jewelry salesman at all.
1902
01:43:52,184 --> 01:43:53,800
I am a very wealthy man.
1903
01:43:54,729 --> 01:43:56,436
As a matter of fact...
1904
01:43:57,773 --> 01:43:59,389
I am Jean-Marc Clement.
1905
01:43:59,483 --> 01:44:00,940
Ha.
1906
01:44:01,026 --> 01:44:03,359
You don't believe it?
1907
01:44:03,446 --> 01:44:05,062
Come on. Let's get some air.
1908
01:44:05,156 --> 01:44:06,818
I'm not fooling you!
1909
01:44:07,408 --> 01:44:10,901
You see, the other day my
public relations man came in my office...
1910
01:44:10,995 --> 01:44:13,738
- Your what?
- Amanda, I am Jean-Marc Clement.
1911
01:44:14,707 --> 01:44:17,415
You see, I had just returned
from the Hong Kong office the other day,
1912
01:44:17,501 --> 01:44:19,538
and my public relations man
said to me, "I read in the...
1913
01:44:19,628 --> 01:44:20,664
I've got my... I left...
1914
01:44:20,755 --> 01:44:22,712
in the Variety"...
1915
01:44:22,798 --> 01:44:24,255
- I-I didn't even...
- In the very...
1916
01:44:24,341 --> 01:44:25,457
Ooh!
1917
01:44:25,551 --> 01:44:26,541
Amanda!
1918
01:44:27,386 --> 01:44:28,877
Amanda!
1919
01:44:28,971 --> 01:44:32,055
Amanda! I'm a billionaire!
1920
01:44:32,141 --> 01:44:37,887
♪♪ ♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1921
01:44:37,980 --> 01:44:39,846
♪ And I... ♪♪
1922
01:44:44,487 --> 01:44:47,355
Mr. Welch, could we wait a minute
so I can do it with Miss Dell?
1923
01:44:47,448 --> 01:44:48,905
It's really her number.
1924
01:44:48,991 --> 01:44:51,404
I don't see what difference
it can possibly make.
1925
01:44:59,919 --> 01:45:01,626
Amanda.
1926
01:45:04,173 --> 01:45:06,460
- Amanda.
- Go away. I'm getting into my costume.
1927
01:45:06,550 --> 01:45:08,041
Now, listen to me.
1928
01:45:08,135 --> 01:45:10,593
The other day I came here
with my public relations...
1929
01:45:10,679 --> 01:45:13,592
Darling. I am Jean-Marc Clement.
1930
01:45:13,682 --> 01:45:16,220
Oh, don't say that again.
You don't have to be Clement.
1931
01:45:16,310 --> 01:45:18,347
But I do have to be. I can't help it.
1932
01:45:18,437 --> 01:45:20,099
I saw you, I wanted you,
1933
01:45:20,189 --> 01:45:22,306
and before I knew it,
I was Alexander Dumas.
1934
01:45:22,399 --> 01:45:24,140
You know what I did?
1935
01:45:24,235 --> 01:45:26,943
I got Bing Crosby
to work with me on a song.
1936
01:45:27,029 --> 01:45:29,988
I paid Milton Berle,
and Gene Kelly too and...
1937
01:45:30,074 --> 01:45:32,908
- Oh, darling.
- Yes?
1938
01:45:32,993 --> 01:45:35,110
- It's all my fault.
- Yes.
1939
01:45:35,204 --> 01:45:36,411
- Come in.
- Yes.
1940
01:45:36,497 --> 01:45:37,658
- Lie down.
- Yes.
1941
01:45:42,962 --> 01:45:46,455
I told you to get into the character
and that's wonderful,
1942
01:45:46,549 --> 01:45:48,711
but now you've got to get out.
1943
01:45:48,801 --> 01:45:50,383
Amanda, you'll drive me crazy.
1944
01:45:50,469 --> 01:45:52,631
Don't say that. Relax.
1945
01:45:53,806 --> 01:45:56,093
It'll all go away.
1946
01:45:56,183 --> 01:45:59,142
Listen. There used to be an actor.
1947
01:45:59,228 --> 01:46:01,971
He played Abraham Lincoln
for so many years...
1948
01:46:02,064 --> 01:46:03,646
This is true.
1949
01:46:03,732 --> 01:46:05,894
He grew his own beard.
1950
01:46:05,985 --> 01:46:08,102
He went around in a shawl.
1951
01:46:08,195 --> 01:46:10,107
And you know what they used to say?
1952
01:46:10,197 --> 01:46:13,315
"He looks like Lincoln,
he talks like Lincoln,
1953
01:46:13,409 --> 01:46:15,901
but he won't be satisfied
till he gets shot."
1954
01:46:16,537 --> 01:46:17,994
I'll prove it to you.
1955
01:46:18,080 --> 01:46:20,788
That doesn't matter.
You don't have to be a rich man.
1956
01:46:22,167 --> 01:46:23,157
No?
1957
01:46:23,794 --> 01:46:25,831
If you mean what you say.
1958
01:46:26,797 --> 01:46:28,959
Money doesn't mean anything to me.
1959
01:46:29,049 --> 01:46:30,039
I get jobs.
1960
01:46:30,801 --> 01:46:32,793
Forget all that, will you?
1961
01:46:34,054 --> 01:46:36,216
Oh, my dear girl.
1962
01:46:36,765 --> 01:46:39,382
How long I have waited to hear that.
1963
01:46:40,394 --> 01:46:41,510
I'm so glad.
1964
01:46:48,527 --> 01:46:50,359
I'm so glad.
1965
01:46:51,780 --> 01:46:53,271
Now tell me.
1966
01:46:53,365 --> 01:46:54,822
Who are you?
1967
01:46:57,870 --> 01:47:00,988
Amanda,
I am Jean-Marc Clement.
1968
01:47:01,081 --> 01:47:04,495
Now, look. Enough's enough, Alexander.
1969
01:47:04,585 --> 01:47:07,749
Okay, call Berle. Call Gene Kelly.
Call Bing Crosby! Come on.
1970
01:47:07,838 --> 01:47:10,421
Sure. I'll go right out
and get 'em on the phone.
1971
01:47:10,507 --> 01:47:13,124
You get a kick out of this,
whoever you are.
1972
01:47:13,802 --> 01:47:17,216
I can't stand anyone who makes fun of me.
1973
01:47:17,306 --> 01:47:18,968
Can I be of any assistance?
1974
01:47:19,058 --> 01:47:20,390
- George.
- What?
1975
01:47:20,476 --> 01:47:22,468
- Tell her who I am.
- Who you are? Certainly.
1976
01:47:22,561 --> 01:47:24,644
- He's Alexander Dumas.
- No, George!
1977
01:47:25,189 --> 01:47:26,771
Tell her the truth.
1978
01:47:26,857 --> 01:47:27,847
- The truth?
- Yes.
1979
01:47:27,942 --> 01:47:29,558
Oh, I beg your pardon.
That's different.
1980
01:47:29,652 --> 01:47:34,397
- Actually, he's Jean-Marc...
- Marc Clement!
1981
01:47:34,490 --> 01:47:35,947
What?
1982
01:47:36,033 --> 01:47:39,117
Who are you? King Farouk, I suppose.
1983
01:47:39,995 --> 01:47:44,831
I hope you both enjoyed it. It's true what
they say... There's no comedians left!
1984
01:47:45,334 --> 01:47:46,996
But... That...
1985
01:48:01,016 --> 01:48:05,010
♪ I'm susceptible ♪
1986
01:48:05,104 --> 01:48:10,725
♪ To stars in the skies ♪
1987
01:48:10,818 --> 01:48:17,065
♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1988
01:48:17,157 --> 01:48:20,741
♪ If they're told to me ♪
1989
01:48:20,828 --> 01:48:24,412
♪ All covered with sighs ♪
1990
01:48:24,498 --> 01:48:27,206
♪ The wildest of lies ♪
1991
01:48:27,292 --> 01:48:30,160
♪ Seem true ♪
1992
01:48:31,714 --> 01:48:36,926
♪ Each time a lovebird sings ♪
1993
01:48:37,011 --> 01:48:42,882
♪ I have no defenses ♪
1994
01:48:42,975 --> 01:48:48,437
♪ My heart is off on wings ♪
1995
01:48:48,522 --> 01:48:53,187
♪ Along with my senses ♪
1996
01:48:53,277 --> 01:48:59,239
♪ I'm a setup for the moon
when it's bright ♪
1997
01:48:59,324 --> 01:49:04,786
♪ I'm incurably romantic ♪
1998
01:49:04,872 --> 01:49:09,708
♪ And I shouldn't be
allowed out at night ♪
1999
01:49:09,793 --> 01:49:15,414
♪ With anyone quite like you ♪
2000
01:49:16,800 --> 01:49:23,513
♪ But, oh, your arms are nice ♪
2001
01:49:24,600 --> 01:49:27,434
♪ And it would be awfully nice ♪
2002
01:49:27,519 --> 01:49:30,557
Is it too much to ask
whether I like his performance?
2003
01:49:30,647 --> 01:49:33,230
Of course you like it.
That's not the problem.
2004
01:49:33,317 --> 01:49:37,357
♪ Turned out to be ♪
2005
01:49:37,446 --> 01:49:43,989
♪ Starry-eyed like me ♪
2006
01:49:44,787 --> 01:49:49,407
♪ And incurably ♪
2007
01:49:49,500 --> 01:49:56,498
♪ Romantic ♪
2008
01:49:57,800 --> 01:50:00,258
♪ Too ♪♪
2009
01:50:02,471 --> 01:50:03,837
Listen.
2010
01:50:03,931 --> 01:50:06,173
Get an injunction to close the show.
2011
01:50:07,518 --> 01:50:09,305
Invasion of privacy.
2012
01:50:16,735 --> 01:50:18,727
I don't know...
2013
01:50:19,905 --> 01:50:22,397
He can't do this. It's impossible.
2014
01:50:22,491 --> 01:50:24,904
Obviously he can, my dear.
This is a very legal document.
2015
01:50:24,993 --> 01:50:27,406
Brother!
This is the end. The story of my life.
2016
01:50:27,496 --> 01:50:29,658
I guess you'll have to cut
the "Specialization" number.
2017
01:50:29,748 --> 01:50:32,832
You can't cut that.
It's a wonderful number.
2018
01:50:32,918 --> 01:50:34,250
Oh, I love that number.
2019
01:50:34,336 --> 01:50:36,123
Yes, but he resents
the ridicule.
2020
01:50:36,213 --> 01:50:39,047
We'll get a lawyer. Who is he? Hitler?
2021
01:50:39,133 --> 01:50:40,715
Excuse me.
2022
01:50:40,801 --> 01:50:42,588
I have a suggestion.
2023
01:50:42,678 --> 01:50:44,419
For every lawyer you get,
2024
01:50:44,513 --> 01:50:46,175
Mr. Clement will have five.
2025
01:50:46,265 --> 01:50:47,472
That's not good.
2026
01:50:47,558 --> 01:50:50,266
- You have a much better weapon.
- What's that?
2027
01:50:50,352 --> 01:50:53,015
The one thing Clement cannot resist...
2028
01:50:53,105 --> 01:50:54,312
a beautiful woman.
2029
01:50:54,398 --> 01:50:55,559
Say now.
2030
01:50:55,649 --> 01:50:58,141
If Miss Dell would pay him a visit,
2031
01:50:58,235 --> 01:51:00,602
I feel sure she could charm him.
2032
01:51:00,696 --> 01:51:02,608
Charm him? I could murder him.
2033
01:51:02,698 --> 01:51:04,690
He'll adore you. I'm sure.
2034
01:51:04,783 --> 01:51:08,276
What about that, Amanda? Maybe if you told
him what the show was really like...
2035
01:51:08,370 --> 01:51:11,454
I think it would be a good idea,
young man, if you went along too.
2036
01:51:11,540 --> 01:51:13,247
After all, they're both French, you know.
2037
01:51:13,333 --> 01:51:14,995
That's right.
They both of 'em are French.
2038
01:51:15,085 --> 01:51:17,168
I would be glad to help if I can.
2039
01:51:17,254 --> 01:51:18,790
Try it, will ya, Amanda?
2040
01:51:18,881 --> 01:51:21,624
There's no time to fight him in court
if we're gonna open tonight.
2041
01:51:21,717 --> 01:51:23,879
But I'm not going alone with him
or his friend here.
2042
01:51:23,969 --> 01:51:25,835
No, honey, we'll all go.
2043
01:51:25,929 --> 01:51:27,670
Come on.
I'll try to make an appointment.
2044
01:51:27,764 --> 01:51:29,847
I think it might be better
if I made the call.
2045
01:51:29,933 --> 01:51:32,016
Swell! You can tell him in French.
2046
01:52:02,758 --> 01:52:05,091
- Good morning, sir.
- Good morning.
2047
01:52:07,429 --> 01:52:08,715
We want to see Mr. Clement.
2048
01:52:12,226 --> 01:52:14,639
We're from the Let's Make Love company.
It's very important.
2049
01:52:23,654 --> 01:52:26,112
What's the matter with her?
2050
01:52:26,198 --> 01:52:28,281
Did I say something?
2051
01:52:29,910 --> 01:52:32,448
Hey, what's the matter with you?
2052
01:52:32,537 --> 01:52:34,199
Won't you come in?
2053
01:52:35,874 --> 01:52:38,036
She didn't say it's all right though,
did she?
2054
01:52:38,126 --> 01:52:39,617
No.
2055
01:52:57,062 --> 01:52:59,054
- Good morning, sir.
- Good morning.
2056
01:53:02,150 --> 01:53:03,982
We want to see Mr. Clement.
Is he in?
2057
01:53:07,990 --> 01:53:09,276
Yes, miss.
2058
01:53:10,993 --> 01:53:13,360
I suppose we may as well go in.
2059
01:53:36,184 --> 01:53:39,222
What is this? A war of nerves?
2060
01:53:47,112 --> 01:53:48,319
Alex!
2061
01:53:49,114 --> 01:53:51,026
You can't sit there.
2062
01:53:52,993 --> 01:53:55,155
You can't look through his mail!
2063
01:53:56,455 --> 01:53:58,071
I'll do the mail now.
2064
01:54:00,542 --> 01:54:02,909
You've got to see a doctor.
2065
01:54:03,003 --> 01:54:05,996
Come. We gotta get outta here.
2066
01:54:06,089 --> 01:54:09,332
Come. Come quietly. Quietly.
2067
01:54:09,426 --> 01:54:11,338
We gotta get outta he...
2068
01:54:14,264 --> 01:54:16,347
- Good morning.
- Bonjour, monsieur.
2069
01:54:22,189 --> 01:54:25,728
To Dottore Gina Martinelli, Milano.
2070
01:54:45,545 --> 01:54:47,332
Jean-Marc Clement.
2071
01:54:49,508 --> 01:54:51,795
Why don't you sit down?
This won't take long.
2072
01:54:53,387 --> 01:54:56,755
No, sir. I won't.
2073
01:54:59,059 --> 01:55:00,220
That will be all.
2074
01:55:01,436 --> 01:55:04,019
Please, darling.
Darling.
2075
01:55:04,106 --> 01:55:06,268
There was no other way.
2076
01:55:08,110 --> 01:55:09,601
You...
2077
01:55:11,238 --> 01:55:12,695
Shame on you!
2078
01:55:12,781 --> 01:55:13,942
Please understand.
2079
01:55:14,032 --> 01:55:16,866
Letting me go on and on like a fool...
2080
01:55:16,952 --> 01:55:19,069
when you knew how I felt about you.
2081
01:55:19,162 --> 01:55:20,824
I... I apologize. I beg you.
2082
01:55:20,914 --> 01:55:24,078
Darling! Forgive me, darling. I beg you.
2083
01:55:24,167 --> 01:55:28,582
But look... Look what happened
the moment you knew who I was.
2084
01:55:28,672 --> 01:55:30,880
Even you were impressed. Admit it.
2085
01:55:30,966 --> 01:55:33,629
You no longer saw me. You saw only power.
2086
01:55:34,386 --> 01:55:37,550
Really, I've never
been so humiliated in my life.
2087
01:55:38,557 --> 01:55:40,924
The least you could have done
is tell me who you are.
2088
01:55:41,017 --> 01:55:42,098
I did tell you.
2089
01:55:42,185 --> 01:55:44,893
- How did you expect me to believe it?
- Because it was true.
2090
01:55:44,980 --> 01:55:46,721
That's no excuse.
2091
01:55:47,774 --> 01:55:49,731
Listen, darling. Listen.
2092
01:55:49,818 --> 01:55:53,152
And I never want to see you again
as long as I live!
2093
01:55:53,238 --> 01:55:55,025
Amanda.
2094
01:55:56,992 --> 01:55:58,483
Amanda!
2095
01:56:08,336 --> 01:56:13,798
Amanda... Amanda, darling, listen to me.
2096
01:56:15,302 --> 01:56:18,591
I ask you to stop the elevator
and come back.
2097
01:56:18,680 --> 01:56:20,717
I will not.
2098
01:56:20,807 --> 01:56:23,174
I'm up here
on the top of the world, Amanda,
2099
01:56:23,268 --> 01:56:26,602
but my soul is going
down to the street with you,
2100
01:56:26,688 --> 01:56:30,602
so I beg you to understand
that I must stop the elevator.
2101
01:56:30,692 --> 01:56:32,308
Brace yourself, darling.
2102
01:56:32,402 --> 01:56:34,439
You will not stop...
2103
01:56:47,042 --> 01:56:50,877
And don't think you're going to charm
your way out of this...
2104
01:56:51,796 --> 01:56:53,332
What a life!
2105
01:56:53,423 --> 01:56:57,133
And all the time I'm trying to figure out
how to buy you a square meal.
2106
01:56:57,219 --> 01:57:00,758
How could you bear
watching me make a fool out of myself?
2107
01:57:00,847 --> 01:57:04,261
♪ Here we stand ♪
2108
01:57:04,351 --> 01:57:06,263
♪ And we argue ♪
2109
01:57:06,353 --> 01:57:09,471
- ♪ What are we ♪
- Alexander Dumas.
2110
01:57:09,564 --> 01:57:12,307
- ♪ Thinking of ♪
- The Three Musketeers.
2111
01:57:12,400 --> 01:57:14,392
♪ Let's not make ♪
2112
01:57:14,486 --> 01:57:16,569
♪ With the pfft, pfft ♪
2113
01:57:16,655 --> 01:57:18,942
♪ Baby ♪
2114
01:57:19,991 --> 01:57:22,779
- Faker.
- ♪ Let's make love ♪
2115
01:57:23,662 --> 01:57:26,405
Why do I like you?
2116
01:57:26,498 --> 01:57:29,582
♪ You'll just love ♪
2117
01:57:29,668 --> 01:57:31,751
♪ My embraces ♪
2118
01:57:31,836 --> 01:57:34,704
♪ 'Cause they'll fit ♪
2119
01:57:34,798 --> 01:57:36,915
♪ Like a glove ♪
2120
01:57:37,008 --> 01:57:39,671
♪ We could get ♪
2121
01:57:39,761 --> 01:57:41,593
♪ Down to cases ♪
2122
01:57:41,680 --> 01:57:44,423
♪ Maybe ♪
2123
01:57:45,809 --> 01:57:49,769
♪ Kiss me, baby ♪
2124
01:57:59,364 --> 01:58:03,654
My. Oh, my. It's warm here.
2125
01:58:03,743 --> 01:58:06,656
♪ Let's make love ♪
2126
01:58:06,746 --> 01:58:08,738
Should I still
get my diploma?
2127
01:58:08,832 --> 01:58:10,323
♪ Let's make love ♪
2128
01:58:12,085 --> 01:58:13,075
Oh, darling.
2129
01:58:13,169 --> 01:58:16,207
Will they be surprised
at night school.
2130
01:58:30,186 --> 01:58:32,178
Subtitled by Captions, Inc.
159831
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof