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1
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Previously on Future Man...
2
00:00:04,671 --> 00:00:07,090
What happened, you spaz
out playing Biotic Wars?
3
00:00:07,174 --> 00:00:09,343
Smash your joystick again?
4
00:00:09,426 --> 00:00:11,887
Santiago!
5
00:00:14,806 --> 00:00:17,476
Thanks to you I've made
all my research public.
6
00:00:17,559 --> 00:00:19,895
Time to die, Dr. Death.
7
00:00:26,652 --> 00:00:28,445
Wait, that's Carl, he's human!
8
00:00:28,528 --> 00:00:30,572
I know these people, I work with them!
9
00:00:30,656 --> 00:00:34,076
Of course you do,
Biotics could be anybody.
10
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That's what makes this so fucked up.
11
00:00:51,093 --> 00:00:52,886
Shit, shit, shit, shit!
12
00:00:52,970 --> 00:00:54,304
Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!
13
00:00:54,388 --> 00:00:56,098
- Stop shitting!
- Fuck, fuck!
14
00:00:56,181 --> 00:00:57,781
Why didn't the game say they were human?
15
00:00:59,017 --> 00:01:00,536
Because we didn't want to humanize them!
16
00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:01,895
What's with their nutsack faces?
17
00:01:01,979 --> 00:01:03,939
That's biomembrane,
it helps them heal faster.
18
00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:05,462
- Why'd you block our shot?
- My god,
19
00:01:05,524 --> 00:01:06,876
those are people that
I fucking work with.
20
00:01:06,900 --> 00:01:08,527
Barely people, they're grown in labs!
21
00:01:08,610 --> 00:01:10,779
Why the fuck did you block our shot?
22
00:01:10,862 --> 00:01:13,156
Because killing Kronish
won't help, all right?
23
00:01:13,240 --> 00:01:14,300
His research is already out there,
24
00:01:14,324 --> 00:01:15,617
the cure can come from anyone!
25
00:01:15,701 --> 00:01:17,911
Yeah, because of you, you dick weevil.
26
00:01:17,995 --> 00:01:19,975
- Are there more of these things?
- Absolutely!
27
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Hit it!
28
00:01:20,949 --> 00:01:23,959
Sleeper agents, they knew
he came back to 2017,
29
00:01:24,042 --> 00:01:26,044
they sent them earlier
to hide in plain sight.
30
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- That's kind of cool I guess.
- Let's just leave them here.
31
00:01:29,381 --> 00:01:33,051
No, no, guys, you can't
just leave them anywhere.
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You can't leave anything
from the future in the past,
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especially not these genetically
perfect mutant creatures
34
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with nutsack membrane faces!
35
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If these things got into
the wrong hands who knows
36
00:01:41,768 --> 00:01:43,812
what kind of future
you guys would have left.
37
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Come on, this is Time Travel 101.
38
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Okay, then how do we get rid of them?
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00:01:53,530 --> 00:01:55,157
Fuck.
40
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I think I know how.
41
00:02:01,204 --> 00:02:05,250
Why is this human body
disposal unit so small?
42
00:02:05,334 --> 00:02:06,574
Well, it's really only designed
43
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for incinerating dead possums.
44
00:02:09,171 --> 00:02:10,756
Dr. Kronish's big breakthrough came
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from studying their DNA.
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I guess there's something super special
47
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about their ejaculate.
48
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How do they die?
49
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Well, sometimes the lab techs need
50
00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:21,850
a lot of their ejaculate,
51
00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:23,352
so they stimulate the possum
52
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and make it cum more than natural,
53
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and I guess they push it too far,
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and the possum cums to death.
55
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How often does that happen?
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00:02:36,198 --> 00:02:40,535
Often enough we had
to get an incinerator.
57
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Well...
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Let's get to it.
59
00:03:01,348 --> 00:03:03,225
I can't watch this anymore.
60
00:03:03,308 --> 00:03:04,935
Hey.
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00:03:05,018 --> 00:03:06,895
You better fucking watch this, okay?
62
00:03:06,978 --> 00:03:09,356
Because you need to know
how to take out these perfs.
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00:03:09,381 --> 00:03:10,374
Perfs?
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00:03:10,399 --> 00:03:13,944
We call these genetically
perfect assholes.
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Not so perfect anymore!
66
00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:20,325
All right, what was this one's name?
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I don't know, I never talked with her.
68
00:03:23,412 --> 00:03:25,163
She's just so pretty.
69
00:03:25,247 --> 00:03:28,208
Yeah, they're all fucking
pretty on the outside.
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00:03:28,291 --> 00:03:30,168
I always called her Pretty Smile Girl.
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00:03:30,252 --> 00:03:31,586
All right, imagine this,
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Pretty Smile Girl, she's coming at you
73
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and all you have is your shredder blade.
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You stab Pretty Smile Girl in the liver.
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00:03:36,633 --> 00:03:37,843
That's a fucking kill.
76
00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:40,679
You stab Pretty Smile Girl
in the heart, that's a kill.
77
00:03:40,762 --> 00:03:42,347
But Pretty Smile Girl's head?
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00:03:42,431 --> 00:03:43,699
You're going to want to be real careful
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00:03:43,723 --> 00:03:44,933
of Pretty Smile Girl's head.
80
00:03:45,016 --> 00:03:47,269
Can we please just leave
Pretty Smile Girl's head alone?
81
00:03:47,352 --> 00:03:49,062
No.
82
00:03:49,146 --> 00:03:53,608
Every Biotic soldier has a
bomb implanted in their head.
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If a Biotic's about to be
captured, they trigger this.
84
00:03:57,737 --> 00:03:58,780
Brain bomb.
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00:03:58,864 --> 00:04:01,533
It blows their heads so
they can't be interrogated.
86
00:04:01,616 --> 00:04:03,618
It also sends a distress
signal to the future
87
00:04:03,702 --> 00:04:06,455
telling the Biotics
to send reinforcements.
88
00:04:06,538 --> 00:04:08,858
I really feel like you should've
included that in the game.
89
00:04:08,915 --> 00:04:10,435
That's why we spend
a year of combattraining
90
00:04:10,459 --> 00:04:14,087
just learning how to stab right there.
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00:04:14,171 --> 00:04:15,839
It won't kill them,
92
00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:18,133
but it does disable the bomb.
93
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Noted.
94
00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:25,223
One more for the gobulator.
95
00:04:29,519 --> 00:04:32,522
Are you sure that's safe?
96
00:04:32,606 --> 00:04:34,775
Fuck you think a gobulator does?
97
00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:46,119
All right, Wolf, fire up the TTD.
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00:04:46,203 --> 00:04:47,579
Let's go back to earlier today
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00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:50,207
before Future Man fucked everything up.
100
00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:51,625
Take out Kronish.
101
00:04:51,708 --> 00:04:53,502
No, no, you guys don't get it.
102
00:04:53,585 --> 00:04:56,421
Kronish has been doing this
research his entire life.
103
00:04:56,505 --> 00:04:58,024
Okay, even if you went
back and killed him,
104
00:04:58,048 --> 00:04:59,525
somebody else could just
pick up where he left off
105
00:04:59,549 --> 00:05:01,843
and the cure would still be created.
106
00:05:01,927 --> 00:05:04,763
I mean, the only way
you could be sure is to...
107
00:05:04,846 --> 00:05:07,074
I don't know, you'd have to do
a fullon Terminator thing.
108
00:05:07,098 --> 00:05:09,434
Go back and stop him
before he was ever born.
109
00:05:09,518 --> 00:05:12,979
Or we kill him when he's one
of those little baby things.
110
00:05:13,063 --> 00:05:15,899
No, absolutely not,
you cannot kill a baby.
111
00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:18,360
- They're invincible?
- No, they are helpless
112
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- and they're very soft.
- Perfect, easy kill.
113
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Yeah, give us a date.
114
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- That fucker!
- What?
115
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The TTD got damaged in the fight.
116
00:05:29,371 --> 00:05:30,956
Shit, that's not a lot of Cameronium.
117
00:05:31,039 --> 00:05:33,375
Maybe enough for one
more jump if we're lucky.
118
00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:34,709
What the hell is Cameronium?
119
00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:36,878
It's the fuel the TTD runs off of.
120
00:05:36,962 --> 00:05:38,755
Talk about Time Travel 101.
121
00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:40,882
All right, this is what we do.
122
00:05:40,966 --> 00:05:43,343
We use our last jump, we go
back, we kill baby Kronish.
123
00:05:43,426 --> 00:05:45,387
That, that is the new mission.
124
00:05:45,470 --> 00:05:47,556
No, no!
125
00:05:47,639 --> 00:05:49,975
Killing a baby is absolutely wrong
126
00:05:50,058 --> 00:05:52,227
and it makes us the monsters.
127
00:05:52,310 --> 00:05:54,771
Agree to disagree, give us a date.
128
00:05:54,855 --> 00:05:56,106
I don't know when he was born.
129
00:05:56,189 --> 00:05:57,983
Wolf, choke it out of him.
130
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- Gladly.
- No, no, no, no.
131
00:06:00,777 --> 00:06:02,863
No, no!
132
00:06:02,946 --> 00:06:05,407
If you can't jump back to your time,
133
00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:06,801
then you'll never know if your mission
134
00:06:06,825 --> 00:06:08,618
was a success or not.
135
00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:11,371
What if killing Kronish
doesn't actually work?
136
00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:14,791
- It'll work.
- Are you sure?
137
00:06:14,875 --> 00:06:17,210
Don't you want proof?
138
00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:22,632
I mean, what do you even
really know about time travel?
139
00:06:22,716 --> 00:06:25,468
Do you know about multiverses?
140
00:06:25,552 --> 00:06:27,929
Or alternate realities?
141
00:06:28,013 --> 00:06:29,639
Or what about time loops?
142
00:06:29,723 --> 00:06:32,267
Because if you're wrong
about one of those things
143
00:06:32,350 --> 00:06:34,269
then your mission will
be a complete failure
144
00:06:34,352 --> 00:06:37,981
and you'll be stuck in the past forever.
145
00:06:38,064 --> 00:06:40,483
Fine, we'll find more Cameronium here,
146
00:06:40,567 --> 00:06:41,985
and then we are going back
147
00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:44,112
and we're killing little baby Kronish.
148
00:06:44,195 --> 00:06:46,448
Where's the closest Cameronium outpost?
149
00:06:46,531 --> 00:06:50,160
I just told you I don't even
know what Cameronium is.
150
00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:52,954
It's biofuel, it's been around forever.
151
00:06:53,038 --> 00:06:56,041
- What's it made of?
- I... plants, I don't know!
152
00:06:56,124 --> 00:07:00,295
You tell us, you're the scientist.
153
00:07:00,378 --> 00:07:02,047
You work in a laboratory.
154
00:07:02,130 --> 00:07:04,257
That's your science wand.
155
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:09,179
What is your job here?
156
00:07:12,432 --> 00:07:14,059
A fucking janitor?
157
00:07:14,142 --> 00:07:16,978
Do you know who's a janitor
where we come from?
158
00:07:17,062 --> 00:07:19,064
- A robot?
- Nobody!
159
00:07:19,147 --> 00:07:20,482
Because in a battle of survival,
160
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:22,567
no one gives a dick about clean floors!
161
00:07:22,651 --> 00:07:24,211
I knew he wasn't the savior,
I knew it the minute
162
00:07:24,235 --> 00:07:25,737
he jizzed all over my torso!
163
00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:27,238
- I can still help!
- No, no, no.
164
00:07:27,322 --> 00:07:29,115
You can't, we don't need you.
165
00:07:29,199 --> 00:07:30,659
You get in the way, you're weak,
166
00:07:30,742 --> 00:07:33,536
you fucking inspired Kronish
to share the cure!
167
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:37,916
And on a personal level,
I'm not sure I like you.
168
00:07:37,999 --> 00:07:41,336
You're off the team, Futterman.
169
00:07:41,419 --> 00:07:44,839
Even your name's a disappointment.
170
00:07:44,923 --> 00:07:46,591
Guys, don't do this!
171
00:07:46,675 --> 00:07:50,136
- Where are you going?
- To finish the mission without you.
172
00:07:50,220 --> 00:07:51,805
You're covered in brains!
173
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:53,556
Eat a dick!
174
00:08:41,021 --> 00:08:43,064
Keep your eyes peeled
from a Cameronium outpost.
175
00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:46,568
- Call 911.
- I want one of those.
176
00:08:50,321 --> 00:08:52,115
Best cock I've ever eaten.
177
00:08:55,702 --> 00:08:57,203
Hey, we're in luck.
178
00:08:57,287 --> 00:08:59,122
Green plus of Cameronium, see?
179
00:08:59,205 --> 00:09:01,166
We don't need that idiot.
180
00:09:03,168 --> 00:09:05,545
- Where's the Cameronium?
- I already told you,
181
00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:08,214
the most powerful stuff we
have is the Godfather OG Kush.
182
00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:10,467
It doesn't get any stronger than that.
183
00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:14,929
Cameronium is way stronger,
it'll skullfuck
184
00:09:15,013 --> 00:09:17,432
your fucking OG Kush
to another dimension.
185
00:09:17,515 --> 00:09:19,642
Hey man, I'd love to try it sometime.
186
00:09:19,726 --> 00:09:21,978
If you track it down, hit me up.
187
00:09:22,062 --> 00:09:23,605
Go easy on those macaroons, dude.
188
00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:25,774
Those are 20 mgs of pot.
189
00:09:27,859 --> 00:09:31,905
Shit, last thing we
need is more dead cops.
190
00:09:31,988 --> 00:09:33,406
More?
191
00:09:59,974 --> 00:10:04,437
Hey, what are you doing?
Get off the street!
192
00:10:14,405 --> 00:10:15,883
Okay, we can rule out the green truck
193
00:10:15,907 --> 00:10:17,387
as a Cameronium source, but I just...
194
00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,953
Owl said that no matter
what time we were in,
195
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:23,873
we'd be able to find it.
What would Owl do if he were here?
196
00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:25,125
Nothing.
197
00:10:25,208 --> 00:10:28,753
Biotics put a merm in his
head and ate his brain.
198
00:10:28,837 --> 00:10:30,338
I watched him die.
199
00:10:30,421 --> 00:10:33,216
Yeah, I know, Wolf, I was there.
200
00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:37,178
You're talking premerm Owl.
201
00:10:37,262 --> 00:10:39,430
Fuck yes, I'm talking premerm Owl.
202
00:10:39,514 --> 00:10:43,476
You know what's crazy?
203
00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:45,311
We're time travelers.
204
00:10:45,395 --> 00:10:46,914
What the fuck is wrong
with you right now?
205
00:10:46,938 --> 00:10:49,482
Why are you acting like
you're drunk off piss wine?
206
00:10:49,566 --> 00:10:51,693
Why are you acting so mean?
207
00:10:51,776 --> 00:10:53,194
Are you like actually mad,
208
00:10:53,278 --> 00:10:55,029
or are you just joking mad?
209
00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:56,364
You need to focus!
210
00:10:56,447 --> 00:10:58,741
We are in a time that
we know nothing about.
211
00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:02,370
Maybe sending a video game
back in time to find
212
00:11:02,453 --> 00:11:06,541
humanity's savior was, like, a bad plan.
213
00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:07,834
My god, you're not helping.
214
00:11:07,917 --> 00:11:11,004
You're just fucking shoving
street cock in your mouth
215
00:11:11,087 --> 00:11:13,214
and looking at your hands
for 45 minutes.
216
00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:16,134
- That cock was so delicious.
- You're going soft on me.
217
00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:17,886
Do you realize it's just us now?
218
00:11:17,969 --> 00:11:19,804
We're the only ones left.
219
00:11:19,888 --> 00:11:22,223
I need you to stay hard.
220
00:11:22,307 --> 00:11:24,058
- I am hard.
- Rock hard?
221
00:11:24,142 --> 00:11:26,227
So god damn fucking hard solid.
222
00:11:26,311 --> 00:11:30,064
- Solid as a fucking rock?
- Yeah!
223
00:11:30,148 --> 00:11:33,401
Then prove it.
224
00:11:33,484 --> 00:11:34,944
Eat that rat.
225
00:11:53,338 --> 00:11:56,132
God, this is so disgusting.
226
00:11:56,216 --> 00:11:58,426
Get the fuck out, no,
you're not allowed.
227
00:11:58,509 --> 00:12:00,178
Back up from whence you came.
228
00:12:00,261 --> 00:12:02,555
This is the command center
for the resistance.
229
00:12:02,639 --> 00:12:04,200
- Please, listen.
- No, there's no Futtermans
230
00:12:04,224 --> 00:12:05,409
allowed, there's no janitors allowed,
231
00:12:05,433 --> 00:12:07,435
there is no one shorter
than us allowed down here.
232
00:12:07,518 --> 00:12:09,646
Okay, I know that you're
like super pissed
233
00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:11,648
at me right now, but I have an idea
234
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,316
and I swear to you it's going to work.
235
00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:14,627
We've got this shit figured out,
236
00:12:14,651 --> 00:12:15,985
we're fine without you.
237
00:12:16,069 --> 00:12:18,154
We've got a plan, we're
rolling out a new plan.
238
00:12:18,238 --> 00:12:20,782
We've got a lot of leads,
Wolf has some leads.
239
00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:24,077
- Wolf?
- I don't have any leads.
240
00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:26,955
Guys, please, let me back on the team.
241
00:12:27,038 --> 00:12:28,039
Get cleaned up.
242
00:12:28,122 --> 00:12:30,291
I know where to get more Cameronium.
243
00:12:36,422 --> 00:12:38,675
I don't remember buying
this, then I realized
244
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:41,970
- it was my dad's Fleshlight.
- That makes sense, yeah.
245
00:12:42,053 --> 00:12:44,305
And nothing's changed here, okay.
246
00:12:44,389 --> 00:12:45,890
Well, look who's back again.
247
00:12:45,974 --> 00:12:48,351
You break another joystick
playing Biotic Wars or...?
248
00:12:48,434 --> 00:12:50,353
No, I stopped playing.
249
00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:54,524
Those characters were so unrealistic.
250
00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:56,943
Boing.
251
00:12:57,026 --> 00:13:00,613
Hey, you're still dating that,
like, chemist guy, right?
252
00:13:00,697 --> 00:13:03,157
- The professor dude?
- Lyle?
253
00:13:03,241 --> 00:13:06,577
No, we broke up, I call
him Professor Ex now.
254
00:13:06,661 --> 00:13:07,745
That's funny.
255
00:13:07,829 --> 00:13:09,622
Was it like a bad messy kind of breakup
256
00:13:09,706 --> 00:13:11,499
or the kind where you
could like casually
257
00:13:11,582 --> 00:13:13,001
put me in contact with him?
258
00:13:13,084 --> 00:13:14,478
No, I mean, I hate him, he used to wear
259
00:13:14,502 --> 00:13:17,005
a buttondown shirt every
time we fucked, I hate him.
260
00:13:17,088 --> 00:13:18,965
- Why do you ask?
- No, nothing.
261
00:13:19,048 --> 00:13:21,050
I just, I started taking these classes
262
00:13:21,134 --> 00:13:24,637
at a community college,
and my first assignment
263
00:13:24,721 --> 00:13:27,473
actually was to interview
a chemist and I thought...
264
00:13:27,557 --> 00:13:29,475
Yeah, what community
college are you at?
265
00:13:29,559 --> 00:13:33,771
It's the California
Community College.
266
00:13:33,855 --> 00:13:35,535
Yeah, I've literally
never heard of that
267
00:13:35,606 --> 00:13:36,858
community college in my life.
268
00:13:36,941 --> 00:13:38,985
It's good, yeah, it's good.
269
00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:44,407
Hey, can I help you?
270
00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:46,868
I can't imagine a situation
where you could.
271
00:13:46,951 --> 00:13:49,829
Nice, the game's afoot.
272
00:13:49,912 --> 00:13:52,415
I've got to say, this
is a pretty dope cosplay.
273
00:13:52,498 --> 00:13:55,668
What is this, Armor Craft
Foam or Wonderflex?
274
00:13:55,752 --> 00:13:58,421
It's titanium PX3900 exoshield.
275
00:13:58,504 --> 00:14:00,715
Bulletproof, laserproof, clawproof.
276
00:14:00,798 --> 00:14:02,050
You're funny, I like that.
277
00:14:02,133 --> 00:14:04,427
Don't touch me, don't ever touch me.
278
00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:06,637
Shopkeep, I have some questions
279
00:14:06,721 --> 00:14:09,599
about this little boy's
murder simulator.
280
00:14:09,682 --> 00:14:11,642
I'm with a customer.
281
00:14:11,726 --> 00:14:15,438
Anyway, you gonna hit up
Dragon Con this year or what?
282
00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:17,732
I swear to you, it's a real school!
283
00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:20,443
Yeah, what's the mascot
for your real school?
284
00:14:20,526 --> 00:14:22,653
It's a real bird!
285
00:14:22,737 --> 00:14:24,405
You're a terrible liar like Pinocchio,
286
00:14:24,489 --> 00:14:26,532
and Pinocchio was wack.
287
00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:32,789
Why would you talk to someone
288
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:34,207
who doesn't want to talk to you?
289
00:14:34,290 --> 00:14:36,709
Because I'm a guy, okay, just let me go!
290
00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:38,252
Futterman, you know this chick?
291
00:14:38,336 --> 00:14:40,505
No, no, I don't.
292
00:14:40,588 --> 00:14:44,008
Fine, fine, next time he loses the arm.
293
00:14:44,092 --> 00:14:45,510
Wait a second.
294
00:14:49,639 --> 00:14:52,725
Did you hire like a super
strong hooker to dress up
295
00:14:52,809 --> 00:14:54,685
like the girl from Biotic Wars?
296
00:14:54,769 --> 00:14:56,270
No, I actually didn't.
297
00:14:56,354 --> 00:14:58,022
What a nasty freak he is.
298
00:14:58,106 --> 00:14:59,291
She doesn't even look like her.
299
00:14:59,315 --> 00:15:00,709
Okay, you know what, we're wasting time.
300
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:02,527
Whoa, no, stop, he's going to have
301
00:15:02,610 --> 00:15:03,879
a conversation over here real quick.
302
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:07,657
What the fuck, man?
303
00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:10,868
Okay, look, for the first time ever,
304
00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:12,787
my life has meaning.
305
00:15:12,870 --> 00:15:15,123
Okay, I have found a true purpose.
306
00:15:15,206 --> 00:15:19,210
I can help a lot of people,
but in order to do that
307
00:15:19,293 --> 00:15:21,629
I believe it is vital
for me to get in contact
308
00:15:21,712 --> 00:15:24,799
with your ex for my quest.
309
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:26,592
What do you say?
310
00:15:26,676 --> 00:15:28,761
- Wow.
- He's pretty stupid.
311
00:15:28,845 --> 00:15:30,304
- Yeah.
- He's pretty stupid.
312
00:15:30,388 --> 00:15:32,431
It's really like... like you had me
313
00:15:32,515 --> 00:15:34,267
and then you just totally lost me.
314
00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:35,350
You know what, fuck it.
315
00:15:35,393 --> 00:15:36,912
I'm just going to tell
you guys the truth, okay?
316
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:38,980
I beat the Biotic Wars
and it turns out that game
317
00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,023
was actually a simulator
sent back from the future
318
00:15:41,107 --> 00:15:42,900
to find humanity's savior, which is me,
319
00:15:42,984 --> 00:15:44,628
and now our time machine
is all out of fuel
320
00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:46,213
and we need to find more,
which is why I hope
321
00:15:46,237 --> 00:15:47,655
your ex can help us get more fuel.
322
00:15:47,738 --> 00:15:49,323
So, that's it, all the fate of humanity
323
00:15:49,407 --> 00:15:52,702
depends upon this moment
right here and now.
324
00:15:55,538 --> 00:15:57,832
Why didn't you just open with that, bro?
325
00:15:57,915 --> 00:15:59,375
Yeah, come on, we're here to help.
326
00:15:59,458 --> 00:16:01,919
- Get that address.
- For real?
327
00:16:02,003 --> 00:16:05,506
Here's Lyle, I hope he can help.
328
00:16:05,590 --> 00:16:07,008
Great, thank you.
329
00:16:07,091 --> 00:16:08,509
Yeah, good luck saving humanity.
330
00:16:08,534 --> 00:16:09,569
Thank you very much.
331
00:16:09,594 --> 00:16:10,988
- Get that time travel juice.
- All right!
332
00:16:11,012 --> 00:16:13,556
- Hey guys, let's go!
- All right.
333
00:16:13,639 --> 00:16:15,183
See you guys, come on, let's go.
334
00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:17,977
- All right.
- Freak.
335
00:16:18,060 --> 00:16:19,645
He is totally going to kill somebody.
336
00:16:19,729 --> 00:16:21,147
Hopefully Lyle.
337
00:16:21,230 --> 00:16:22,499
See, I got us the address, guys.
338
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,025
Aren't you glad I'm back on the team?
339
00:16:24,108 --> 00:16:26,861
Your cover story fell apart
like a shit in your hands.
340
00:16:26,944 --> 00:16:28,422
Well, like you could
do any better, Wolf.
341
00:16:28,446 --> 00:16:31,449
I could, I'm better
than you at everything.
342
00:16:31,532 --> 00:16:33,534
Man, what's with this negativity?
343
00:16:33,618 --> 00:16:35,912
Like, that plan totally worked,
we're like a dream team,
344
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:37,431
- guys, come on.
- You're back on the team
345
00:16:37,455 --> 00:16:40,333
on a provisional basis only,
please remember that.
346
00:16:40,416 --> 00:16:43,419
Yes, Tiger, you've made
that abundantly clear to me.
347
00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:46,714
Look, can you please put on Mom's coat?
348
00:16:46,797 --> 00:16:49,675
- You look really ridiculous.
- What?
349
00:16:49,759 --> 00:16:52,678
Come on, Wolf's rocking
my dad's shit too.
350
00:16:52,762 --> 00:16:54,305
- Here.
- Fine.
351
00:16:54,388 --> 00:16:56,349
Only because you got us the address.
352
00:16:56,432 --> 00:16:59,560
And a ride to the address.
353
00:16:59,644 --> 00:17:00,686
- Futterman?
- Right here.
354
00:17:00,770 --> 00:17:03,022
All right, let's go, team.
355
00:17:06,317 --> 00:17:08,569
Pilot, what is this music?
356
00:17:08,659 --> 00:17:11,370
I think it's Corey Hart.
357
00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,157
I like Corey Hart.
358
00:17:13,241 --> 00:17:16,077
Wolf likes something, turn that shit up.
359
00:17:16,160 --> 00:17:17,578
All right!
360
00:17:25,795 --> 00:17:26,963
No, no, no.
361
00:17:27,046 --> 00:17:28,673
You're off the mark, Corbin.
362
00:17:28,756 --> 00:17:30,150
I need you to go back
to the drawing board,
363
00:17:30,174 --> 00:17:32,093
have a sandwich, just start over.
364
00:17:32,176 --> 00:17:34,387
- Excuse me?
- Professor Karofsky.
365
00:17:34,470 --> 00:17:38,933
Hi, I am Josh Pastman from Kronish Labs.
366
00:17:39,016 --> 00:17:39,934
Um...
367
00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:42,436
- This is my assistant, he's...
- Corey Wolfhart.
368
00:17:42,520 --> 00:17:45,439
That's quite a grip, Mr. Wolfhart.
369
00:17:45,523 --> 00:17:46,899
You can let go.
370
00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:48,401
And this is my other assistant...
371
00:17:48,484 --> 00:17:52,697
Tiger, I'm his mission commander.
372
00:17:52,780 --> 00:17:55,283
I swear, it feels like it sometimes.
373
00:17:55,366 --> 00:17:57,118
Tiger?
374
00:17:57,201 --> 00:17:59,287
Yeah, that's her Burning Man name.
375
00:17:59,370 --> 00:18:03,291
I'm never more myself
than when I'm at the Burn.
376
00:18:03,374 --> 00:18:05,793
Namaste, what can I help you with?
377
00:18:05,876 --> 00:18:07,196
Well, basically over at the labs,
378
00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:09,171
we've got this special
piece of equipment
379
00:18:09,255 --> 00:18:11,799
that utilizes a very unique biofuel
380
00:18:11,882 --> 00:18:14,260
and unfortunately, the manufacturer
381
00:18:14,343 --> 00:18:15,928
is kind of jamming us up right now,
382
00:18:16,012 --> 00:18:17,489
and we were hoping you
could take a look at it,
383
00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:19,140
tell us what it's made of, and you know,
384
00:18:19,223 --> 00:18:21,684
maybe where we can find some more of it.
385
00:18:21,767 --> 00:18:25,730
Home Depot or Lowe's or some other...
386
00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:27,523
Listen, kid.
387
00:18:27,607 --> 00:18:31,360
I would love to help you
solve your work problem
388
00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:36,157
for no compensation, but...
389
00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:40,077
- That's a biofuel?
- That's correct.
390
00:18:44,624 --> 00:18:46,876
What kind of machine did you say
391
00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:49,211
you were running with this?
392
00:18:49,295 --> 00:18:51,839
It's like a centrifuge.
393
00:18:51,922 --> 00:18:55,468
- What kind of centrifuge?
- It's a big one.
394
00:18:55,551 --> 00:18:58,220
All right, what's it made of?
395
00:18:58,304 --> 00:19:02,850
Looks like microorganisms
living in salt water.
396
00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:05,686
Okay, let me run this
through the calorimeter.
397
00:19:18,908 --> 00:19:21,452
Hachi machi.
398
00:19:21,535 --> 00:19:23,329
My equipment here is a bit rudimentary.
399
00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:25,206
So I'm going to take this in the back
400
00:19:25,289 --> 00:19:28,042
and run some more advanced
tests, wait here.
401
00:19:28,125 --> 00:19:31,712
No, we are not letting
that out of our sight.
402
00:19:31,796 --> 00:19:34,382
Because it's very, very important to us.
403
00:19:34,465 --> 00:19:35,609
It's the last bit of our fuel,
404
00:19:35,633 --> 00:19:37,718
so we'd love to come with you.
405
00:19:37,802 --> 00:19:40,388
Okay, it's a clean room back there
406
00:19:40,471 --> 00:19:42,848
and I only have two hazmat suits.
407
00:19:42,932 --> 00:19:46,727
So the tennis pro is going
to have to wait here.
408
00:19:49,480 --> 00:19:51,774
- Stay hard.
- I am hard.
409
00:19:51,857 --> 00:19:53,484
Yeah.
410
00:20:30,438 --> 00:20:34,108
You know, the reason I got into biofuel
411
00:20:34,191 --> 00:20:37,153
is because I knew that climate change
412
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:39,697
would bring about the annihilation
413
00:20:39,780 --> 00:20:41,991
of the entire human species.
414
00:20:42,074 --> 00:20:44,702
Climate change, he could
not be more wrong.
415
00:20:44,785 --> 00:20:46,787
You call yourself a Burner?
416
00:20:46,871 --> 00:20:49,457
People like you are the
reason that my department
417
00:20:49,540 --> 00:20:52,042
gets no funding, the
reason that my girlfriend
418
00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:56,130
left me because my
canola oil powered moped
419
00:20:56,213 --> 00:20:59,967
isn't sexy enough for her.
420
00:21:00,050 --> 00:21:01,594
Who cares if it's sexy?
421
00:21:01,677 --> 00:21:03,637
You are the reason I've had to do
422
00:21:03,721 --> 00:21:07,975
so many unsavory things,
which I'm not proud of,
423
00:21:08,058 --> 00:21:09,393
to keep my research going.
424
00:21:09,477 --> 00:21:11,520
Tiger, Tiger. He's a bad guy.
425
00:21:11,604 --> 00:21:15,107
But this, this is the energy solution
426
00:21:15,191 --> 00:21:17,777
that I've been looking
for my entire life.
427
00:21:21,405 --> 00:21:24,617
This changes everything.
428
00:21:27,244 --> 00:21:31,207
Now...
429
00:21:31,290 --> 00:21:33,459
you are going to tell me
430
00:21:33,542 --> 00:21:35,795
everything you know about this.
431
00:21:35,878 --> 00:21:37,922
No more lies.
432
00:21:38,005 --> 00:21:39,715
Great work, janitor.
433
00:21:48,140 --> 00:21:50,267
That fucker!
434
00:21:50,351 --> 00:21:53,103
Yeah, get it in!!
435
00:21:53,187 --> 00:21:55,564
It's like macaroons for my nose!
436
00:21:55,648 --> 00:21:57,358
What's this stuff called again?
437
00:21:57,441 --> 00:21:59,735
That's meth, baby, that's meth!
438
00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:03,155
Meth, meth!
439
00:22:03,239 --> 00:22:05,741
I could noseeat
10 pounds of this stuff!
440
00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:07,827
Whoa, whoa, whoa, take it easy, kid!
441
00:22:07,910 --> 00:22:09,310
You're going to blow up your heart!
442
00:22:09,370 --> 00:22:12,206
How do I get more,
how do I get more?
443
00:22:12,289 --> 00:22:14,416
Where's it come from, what is it?
444
00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:17,044
Tell me everything you know!
445
00:22:17,127 --> 00:22:19,213
Tell me everything you know.
446
00:22:19,296 --> 00:22:21,340
- We found it.
- Where?
447
00:22:21,423 --> 00:22:24,844
I don't know, you're a
smart guy, you tell us.
448
00:22:24,927 --> 00:22:26,887
At first I thought, "Looks familiar."
449
00:22:26,971 --> 00:22:30,140
Bioluminescent organisms
have been around forever,
450
00:22:30,224 --> 00:22:34,144
but then this shit broke my calorimeter.
451
00:22:34,228 --> 00:22:36,814
Do you have any idea how many
joules it takes to do that?
452
00:22:36,897 --> 00:22:39,316
- A ton?
- Try a fuck ton.
453
00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:43,070
Something like this can only
evolve under immense pressure.
454
00:22:43,153 --> 00:22:46,407
I'm talking hadopelagic pressure.
455
00:22:46,490 --> 00:22:48,325
I don't know what that means.
456
00:22:48,409 --> 00:22:51,745
Of course you fucking don't, nimrod.
457
00:22:51,829 --> 00:22:54,832
This is the bottom of the ocean,
458
00:22:54,915 --> 00:22:57,668
and this is where this shit lives.
459
00:22:57,751 --> 00:23:00,087
Now, how the fuck did you two yahoos
460
00:23:00,170 --> 00:23:02,923
get your hands on it
unless somehow you found
461
00:23:03,007 --> 00:23:06,635
the keys to the most advanced
submersible ever built,
462
00:23:06,719 --> 00:23:08,639
which I doubt very highly,
because you don't even
463
00:23:08,679 --> 00:23:11,140
seem to know what a centrifuge is.
464
00:23:11,223 --> 00:23:13,809
It spins.
465
00:23:13,893 --> 00:23:15,603
Morris.
466
00:23:15,686 --> 00:23:18,355
- The kombucha, please.
- Kombucha?
467
00:23:18,439 --> 00:23:20,691
Now if you thought storebought kombucha
468
00:23:20,774 --> 00:23:24,028
tasted like shit, wait until you get
469
00:23:24,111 --> 00:23:27,781
your taste buds on my
homebrew, Mr. Pastman.
470
00:23:27,865 --> 00:23:29,116
You're gonna love it.
471
00:23:31,243 --> 00:23:32,786
You're not, which is why I laugh.
472
00:23:32,870 --> 00:23:34,663
It tastes like shit,
I already said that.
473
00:23:34,747 --> 00:23:35,789
Let's go!
474
00:23:35,873 --> 00:23:37,791
And thus, in many ways, the drug trade
475
00:23:37,875 --> 00:23:41,170
represents capitalism
in its purest form.
476
00:23:41,253 --> 00:23:42,338
Make sense?
477
00:23:42,421 --> 00:23:45,883
Nothing has ever made
more sense in my life.
478
00:23:45,966 --> 00:23:49,011
- I got to go tell Tiger.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, buddy.
479
00:23:49,094 --> 00:23:51,680
You're not going anywhere.
480
00:23:51,764 --> 00:23:53,432
I'm not?
481
00:24:20,209 --> 00:24:21,502
No more, please!
482
00:24:21,585 --> 00:24:24,588
I can't take it,
it's too... it's too tart!
483
00:24:24,672 --> 00:24:25,839
Please, Tiger, what the fuck?
484
00:24:25,923 --> 00:24:28,926
All right, okay, everybody
stop horsedicking around.
485
00:24:29,009 --> 00:24:30,511
Where can we get more of this fuel?
486
00:24:30,594 --> 00:24:33,347
Are you on fucking peyote, Tiger?
487
00:24:33,430 --> 00:24:37,685
- There is no more of this fuel.
- Fuck.
488
00:24:37,768 --> 00:24:39,168
I mean, if there was any more of it
489
00:24:39,228 --> 00:24:41,063
we wouldn't be here, would we?
490
00:24:41,146 --> 00:24:43,607
So tell me where the fuck you got it.
491
00:24:43,691 --> 00:24:46,068
Morris, 'buch him.
492
00:24:46,151 --> 00:24:48,112
No, no, wait, wait, it
came from a time machine!
493
00:24:48,195 --> 00:24:49,697
It came from a time machine, okay?
494
00:24:49,780 --> 00:24:51,490
Good, thank you.
495
00:24:51,573 --> 00:24:54,535
Great, now we know it
came from a time machine.
496
00:24:54,618 --> 00:24:56,120
Fantastic, I've always wanted one.
497
00:24:56,203 --> 00:24:58,998
Can you get another time machine?
498
00:24:59,081 --> 00:25:00,708
Because if you can't, you'll be drowning
499
00:25:00,791 --> 00:25:02,418
in lemon zinger momentarily.
500
00:25:02,501 --> 00:25:04,211
Morris, the zinger.
501
00:25:04,294 --> 00:25:06,964
Actually, we can get
another time machine.
502
00:25:07,047 --> 00:25:08,549
You've been a very helpful nerd.
503
00:25:08,632 --> 00:25:10,217
This was a great idea.
504
00:25:14,346 --> 00:25:15,431
Awesome.
505
00:25:21,186 --> 00:25:22,813
Hard enough for you?
506
00:25:24,959 --> 00:25:28,736
Come on.
You call yourself an adversary?
507
00:25:28,819 --> 00:25:30,320
Let's do this!
508
00:25:37,453 --> 00:25:39,747
No!
509
00:25:44,793 --> 00:25:46,378
Get over...
510
00:25:46,462 --> 00:25:47,921
Yeah!
511
00:25:51,645 --> 00:25:53,269
No, you don't!
512
00:25:58,514 --> 00:26:01,268
So long, suckers!
513
00:26:10,903 --> 00:26:12,780
Get off... Get...
514
00:26:12,863 --> 00:26:14,823
Fucker's got some fight
in him after all.
515
00:26:19,244 --> 00:26:20,684
- Should I jump in?
- No, no, no, no.
516
00:26:20,746 --> 00:26:22,956
I think he's got this.
517
00:26:23,040 --> 00:26:25,209
Yeah, rip his fucking throat out!
518
00:26:28,378 --> 00:26:30,464
Or at least try to rip
his fucking throat out.
519
00:26:33,300 --> 00:26:35,219
Let go, let go!
520
00:26:39,848 --> 00:26:41,767
Okay.
521
00:26:43,602 --> 00:26:46,313
- Yeah!
- Yeah.
522
00:26:46,396 --> 00:26:47,856
All right.
523
00:26:47,940 --> 00:26:50,317
Where...
524
00:26:51,902 --> 00:26:54,321
I got it!
525
00:26:54,404 --> 00:26:57,157
Kicked his ass, woo!
526
00:26:57,241 --> 00:26:59,993
Yeah, it was the um, the saddest,
most boring fight
527
00:27:00,077 --> 00:27:02,246
I've ever seen, but you
did do it, Futterman.
528
00:27:02,329 --> 00:27:04,206
You're back on the team.
529
00:27:04,289 --> 00:27:05,707
I'm back on the team?
530
00:27:05,791 --> 00:27:08,502
My god, thank you,
I will not let you down.
531
00:27:08,585 --> 00:27:10,337
I will... I'll do whatever you need.
532
00:27:10,420 --> 00:27:11,773
That is great news,
because we might need
533
00:27:11,797 --> 00:27:13,382
a human target for the next mission.
534
00:27:13,465 --> 00:27:15,801
- You'd be perfect.
- What?
535
00:27:15,884 --> 00:27:17,320
You heard what the
windowfaced man said.
536
00:27:17,344 --> 00:27:19,888
We need another time machine.
537
00:27:19,972 --> 00:27:22,057
Biotics, Biotics have time machines.
538
00:27:22,140 --> 00:27:23,910
Yes, and we already know that
they're in the laboratory
539
00:27:23,934 --> 00:27:27,229
that you clean, so we
just have to catch one.
540
00:27:27,312 --> 00:27:29,690
- Okay.
- Great fucking plan!
541
00:27:29,773 --> 00:27:32,526
Who's up for a charge down?
542
00:27:32,609 --> 00:27:35,737
I'll take either, or both.
543
00:27:55,841 --> 00:27:57,551
Hey, good news, old man.
544
00:27:57,634 --> 00:27:59,761
Sketch just came back of the perps.
545
00:27:59,845 --> 00:28:02,514
Let me see that.
546
00:28:06,059 --> 00:28:07,561
What do you think, Skarsgaard?
547
00:28:07,644 --> 00:28:09,646
Does that look like the
chick that punched you?
548
00:28:11,857 --> 00:28:15,944
You know what this sketch is missing?
549
00:28:16,028 --> 00:28:20,616
The corpse of my partner,
Jorge Santiago.
550
00:28:20,699 --> 00:28:23,702
His widow behind him weeping,
551
00:28:23,785 --> 00:28:28,290
belly swollen with child.
552
00:28:28,373 --> 00:28:31,418
Wow, really took the fun out of that.
553
00:28:31,501 --> 00:28:34,630
Come on, we've got Pastman,
we combed this place.
554
00:28:34,713 --> 00:28:37,633
Well, you better get a new comb.
555
00:28:37,716 --> 00:28:40,177
Shit, is that a purple hair?
556
00:28:40,260 --> 00:28:43,430
- Lucky break.
- Hey, you spend 48 years
557
00:28:43,513 --> 00:28:45,557
chasing every shadow and whisper,
558
00:28:45,641 --> 00:28:49,311
then talk to me about luck, punk.
559
00:28:49,394 --> 00:28:50,604
I'm going to run this through
560
00:28:50,687 --> 00:28:55,233
every DNA database in the world.
561
00:28:55,317 --> 00:28:56,860
Going to run every name
562
00:28:56,944 --> 00:29:00,072
that dealer gave us.
563
00:29:00,155 --> 00:29:03,700
Yeah, I'm coming for you.
564
00:29:05,869 --> 00:29:07,877
You and me.
565
00:29:07,970 --> 00:29:10,040
I'm coming for you.
566
00:29:10,064 --> 00:29:12,434
Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
41637
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