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1
00:00:02,877 --> 00:00:04,086
Oh, hey, you guys?
2
00:00:04,254 --> 00:00:07,047
I couldn't get a reservation
for the night of my birthday...
3
00:00:07,257 --> 00:00:09,383
...so we'll have to do dinner
Thursday night instead.
4
00:00:09,592 --> 00:00:14,513
- Thursday? But that's Halloween.
- So?
5
00:00:14,889 --> 00:00:17,016
It's just spooky, that's all.
6
00:00:18,018 --> 00:00:19,768
Uh, so is Mike coming to dinner?
7
00:00:19,978 --> 00:00:23,731
No. It's my first birthday
with a boyfriend, and he has to work.
8
00:00:23,898 --> 00:00:27,943
I'd get mad at him, but I think
it's too soon to show my true colors.
9
00:00:29,696 --> 00:00:31,405
Well, I would make the reservation
for five.
10
00:00:31,573 --> 00:00:33,198
One of us has to stay home
and watch Emma.
11
00:00:33,366 --> 00:00:35,451
- Which one of us should go to dinner?
- Oh, Rachel.
12
00:00:37,829 --> 00:00:41,874
Uh, actually, I was thinking
maybe both of us could go.
13
00:00:42,083 --> 00:00:43,500
Oh, yay.
14
00:00:44,919 --> 00:00:47,713
Thanks. I'll put a lot of extra thought
into your gift.
15
00:00:49,090 --> 00:00:51,300
All right, so great, we can all go now.
16
00:00:51,468 --> 00:00:54,178
That is fun. Hey. You know what?
17
00:00:54,345 --> 00:00:57,806
We all haven't been together,
the six of us, in such a long time.
18
00:00:58,016 --> 00:01:00,225
What are you talking about?
We're all together now.
19
00:01:00,435 --> 00:01:03,020
Uh, Mon? Chandler's not here.
20
00:01:06,733 --> 00:01:08,150
Oh, dear God.
21
00:01:48,900 --> 00:01:51,860
Hello, everyone. It's nice to see
our team together for the first time.
22
00:01:52,028 --> 00:01:55,447
Now, before we get started,
are there any questions?
23
00:01:55,657 --> 00:01:57,366
- Yes. Ken, is it?
- That's right.
24
00:01:57,575 --> 00:02:00,744
Is it true the reason you're in Tulsa
is that you fell asleep in a meeting...
25
00:02:00,912 --> 00:02:03,914
...and took the job without realizing
what you were saying yes to?
26
00:02:06,376 --> 00:02:09,169
Well, don't believe
everything you hear, Ken.
27
00:02:09,337 --> 00:02:10,879
But yeah, that's true.
28
00:02:12,257 --> 00:02:17,594
All right, let's get started by, uh,
taking a look at last quarter's figures.
29
00:02:18,763 --> 00:02:23,100
Uh, Claudia, aren't you supposed
to blow smoke up the boss's ass?
30
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:29,648
- I'm sorry. Does the smoke bother you?
- No. I smoked for years. Then I quit.
31
00:02:29,816 --> 00:02:32,234
Right now, I can't remember why.
32
00:02:32,902 --> 00:02:35,237
You're not allowed to smoke
in this office though, right?
33
00:02:35,446 --> 00:02:39,032
Yes, in Oklahoma it's legal to smoke
in offices with 15 people or less.
34
00:02:39,200 --> 00:02:42,870
- Would you like one?
- All right, look. I don't smoke anymore.
35
00:02:43,079 --> 00:02:46,331
But if the rest of you want to light up,
go ahead, it's fine.
36
00:02:49,794 --> 00:02:52,129
So you all smoke, then? Heh.
37
00:02:52,297 --> 00:02:55,382
You know, it's almost rude
that I'm not smoking.
38
00:02:55,592 --> 00:02:57,968
- That's not true. If you don't wanna smoke...
- Ken, please!
39
00:03:01,264 --> 00:03:04,349
No, I can't. I can't smoke.
If I smoke, my wife would kill me.
40
00:03:04,559 --> 00:03:06,810
I'm sorry, but isn't your wife
back in New York?
41
00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:11,815
I've always liked you, Ken.
42
00:03:17,947 --> 00:03:19,656
Trick or treat.
43
00:03:21,492 --> 00:03:23,368
- Hey.
- Ooh, and "treat" it is.
44
00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:28,373
Wow. So glad I changed.
45
00:03:28,958 --> 00:03:32,753
I almost wore my threadbare robe
that can't contain my breasts.
46
00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:37,090
This is not what I'm wearing.
I'm ovulating...
47
00:03:37,258 --> 00:03:40,677
...and Chandler's gonna be home.
So I thought we would try before dinner.
48
00:03:40,887 --> 00:03:44,598
Oh. Wait, does that...? You guys won't
be late for my dinner, will you?
49
00:03:44,807 --> 00:03:46,975
Chandler and I have not seen each other
in over a week.
50
00:03:47,143 --> 00:03:48,727
We'll probably be the first ones there.
51
00:03:49,812 --> 00:03:51,688
Okay. See you there. Happy humping.
52
00:03:54,108 --> 00:03:55,567
Hey. Well, hey.
53
00:03:55,985 --> 00:03:59,112
Oh. Wow, somebody smoked out here?
54
00:04:01,282 --> 00:04:04,785
My God, don't people know you're
not allowed to smoke in public spaces?
55
00:04:04,994 --> 00:04:10,666
Actually, in Oklahoma, smoking is legal
in offices with fewer than 15 people.
56
00:04:11,334 --> 00:04:13,126
Oh, you smoked.
57
00:04:13,336 --> 00:04:18,090
No. I just happen to know a lot of trivia
about smoking in different states.
58
00:04:18,258 --> 00:04:22,844
For example, in Hawaii,
cigarettes are called lei-lana-lukus.
59
00:04:24,222 --> 00:04:28,767
- Oh, Chandler, you stink of cigarettes.
- Do you think Monica is gonna smell it?
60
00:04:28,977 --> 00:04:32,479
Are you kidding? That woman
has the nose of a bloodhound.
61
00:04:32,647 --> 00:04:36,066
And the breasts of a Greek goddess.
62
00:04:39,487 --> 00:04:41,613
Pheebs?
63
00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,408
I'm gonna go.
64
00:04:48,079 --> 00:04:51,581
Okay. Something to cover the smell.
65
00:04:54,794 --> 00:04:57,129
Oven cleaner.
66
00:05:01,718 --> 00:05:04,177
Unscented.
67
00:05:05,847 --> 00:05:07,347
Welcome home.
68
00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:11,351
I've missed you.
69
00:05:11,519 --> 00:05:16,064
- You wanna join me in the bedroom?
- No, thanks, I'm good.
70
00:05:16,566 --> 00:05:20,944
Oh, okay. So you want to play it
that way, do you?
71
00:05:21,362 --> 00:05:23,864
Well, uh, you know what?
Actually, I just got off a plane...
72
00:05:24,073 --> 00:05:26,366
...so I'm feeling gross.
Maybe I should take a shower.
73
00:05:26,576 --> 00:05:30,329
- Come here, you don't need a shower.
- All right, the truth is...
74
00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:33,373
...I soiled myself
during some turbulence.
75
00:05:37,211 --> 00:05:40,422
What do I smell? I smell smoke.
76
00:05:40,590 --> 00:05:41,757
Did you smoke?
77
00:05:42,967 --> 00:05:45,802
Yes. But I just had one.
78
00:05:45,970 --> 00:05:47,429
Two.
79
00:05:47,597 --> 00:05:50,349
Two tiny cigarettes. Okay, five.
80
00:05:52,060 --> 00:05:55,937
A pack. Two pack... A carton.
81
00:05:56,105 --> 00:05:58,607
Three big fat cartons in two days.
82
00:06:00,401 --> 00:06:03,403
But it's over. I've made a decision,
I'm not gonna smoke anymore.
83
00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:09,201
Well, those are for you.
84
00:06:11,579 --> 00:06:14,956
All right. Well, we'll just, uh,
see you when you get here. Bye.
85
00:06:15,833 --> 00:06:18,752
Oh, that was my mom.
She's stuck in terrible traffic.
86
00:06:18,961 --> 00:06:21,713
Okay, well, that is now the third sign
that I should not leave Emma.
87
00:06:21,923 --> 00:06:24,925
- What are the other two?
- Well, the first one is, I don't want to.
88
00:06:25,093 --> 00:06:28,595
And second one, I'm not going.
89
00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:30,931
I know this is the first time
we're leaving the baby.
90
00:06:31,099 --> 00:06:33,558
Hey, I know how hard it is for you. But...
91
00:06:33,726 --> 00:06:36,853
But everything's gonna be fine.
I mean, my mom is gonna be with her.
92
00:06:37,021 --> 00:06:39,189
- She's great with kids.
- She is?
93
00:06:39,357 --> 00:06:41,191
Yeah.
94
00:06:41,776 --> 00:06:43,235
What about Monica?
95
00:06:43,444 --> 00:06:47,531
Hey, you only hear Monica's side of that.
Okay, that little fatso was a terror.
96
00:06:50,326 --> 00:06:54,913
- I just don't think I can do it.
- You know what? You can and you should.
97
00:06:55,123 --> 00:06:57,082
Really, it'll be good for you.
98
00:06:57,250 --> 00:06:58,291
In fact, you know what?
99
00:06:58,459 --> 00:07:01,545
Why don't you go ahead to the restaurant,
and I will wait for my mom...
100
00:07:01,712 --> 00:07:05,424
...and then I'll meet you there?
No, no, really, you should go. Go out.
101
00:07:05,591 --> 00:07:12,139
Really, the world is your oyster.
Kick up your heels. Paint the town red.
102
00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:17,352
- You need to learn some new slang.
- I'm serious. Come on, you should go.
103
00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:20,397
Here. No, just go.
104
00:07:20,565 --> 00:07:22,524
- Well... Oh!
- No, no. You know what?
105
00:07:22,692 --> 00:07:26,695
You're not getting back in there.
The baby's fine. Now, scram.
106
00:07:28,489 --> 00:07:30,740
Yeah, tell your story walking.
107
00:07:32,243 --> 00:07:34,953
I was just going to say
that I left my keys.
108
00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:36,788
Oh.
109
00:07:38,499 --> 00:07:41,751
Holy moley, are we in a pickle now.
110
00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:48,633
Where is everyone?
They're 40 minutes late.
111
00:07:48,843 --> 00:07:50,802
- I know.
- I'm starving.
112
00:07:51,012 --> 00:07:53,680
I knew we were coming here tonight.
I ate nothing all day.
113
00:07:53,890 --> 00:07:56,016
What about me?
I only had one lunch today.
114
00:07:57,810 --> 00:08:00,687
So are we expecting
the rest of our party shortly?
115
00:08:00,897 --> 00:08:03,231
Yes, they are expected presently.
Yeah.
116
00:08:03,399 --> 00:08:07,027
Their, um... Their arrival is in the offing.
117
00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:09,488
Right. We do have
a table for two available.
118
00:08:09,655 --> 00:08:11,323
- Perhaps you'd be...
- No, they're coming.
119
00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:12,991
We're waiting right here.
120
00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:15,911
Joseph.
121
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:20,624
One needn't worry. They shan't be long.
122
00:08:20,958 --> 00:08:24,377
It's just that we do have
some large parties waiting.
123
00:08:24,587 --> 00:08:27,506
Oh, one really does have a stick
up one's ass, doesn't one?
124
00:08:30,384 --> 00:08:33,553
How can you smoke in this day and age?
Have you not seen that ad? Huh?
125
00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:37,557
Where the little kid walks
through Grandpa? It's chilling.
126
00:08:37,767 --> 00:08:40,602
I messed up. It was a meeting.
Everybody was smoking.
127
00:08:40,811 --> 00:08:42,938
So what? Don't you have any willpower?
128
00:08:43,147 --> 00:08:46,066
Willpower? I've watched home movies
of you eating Ding Dongs...
129
00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:48,068
...without taking the tinfoil off.
130
00:08:50,321 --> 00:08:52,739
You said that was sexy.
131
00:08:54,575 --> 00:08:58,161
Okay, look, can we just drop this?
I'm not gonna smoke again.
132
00:08:58,329 --> 00:09:00,872
That's right, because I forbid you
to smoke again.
133
00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:02,499
- You forbid me?
- Mm-hm.
134
00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:05,544
You know, I've flown a long way
to see my loving wife.
135
00:09:05,711 --> 00:09:07,629
Is she here, by the way?
136
00:09:07,838 --> 00:09:13,218
Chandler, don't joke with me. Okay?
I'm very, very upset right now.
137
00:09:13,386 --> 00:09:15,804
Oh. Would you say this is the most upset
you could be?
138
00:09:15,972 --> 00:09:17,013
I think so.
139
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:19,307
Well, then I might as well...
140
00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:21,601
...do this.
141
00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:34,406
Not really sure what to do now.
142
00:09:35,700 --> 00:09:38,201
I'll tell you what we're gonna do.
143
00:09:38,369 --> 00:09:40,954
We're already late
for Phoebe's birthday dinner.
144
00:09:41,122 --> 00:09:43,039
So you're going to put out
that cigarette...
145
00:09:43,207 --> 00:09:46,042
...we're gonna put this fight on hold,
and go have sex.
146
00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:49,296
Fine. What?
147
00:09:49,505 --> 00:09:52,340
Sex. This is the last day I'm ovulating.
If we don't do it...
148
00:09:52,508 --> 00:09:54,676
...we're gonna have to wait
until next month.
149
00:09:54,844 --> 00:09:56,845
You're serious?
150
00:09:57,013 --> 00:10:00,515
- Oh, yeah.
- All right, fine, I'll do it, but no talking.
151
00:10:00,766 --> 00:10:03,685
- And no cuddling.
- And no kissing your neck.
152
00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:05,812
Oh, good. I hate it when you do that.
153
00:10:09,108 --> 00:10:12,319
And lots of kissing your neck.
154
00:10:13,237 --> 00:10:14,946
Okay, well, the super's not home.
155
00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:17,699
But my mother's gonna be here,
and she has the key.
156
00:10:17,908 --> 00:10:21,119
I can't wait that long. You have to do
something. Knock that door down.
157
00:10:21,329 --> 00:10:23,496
I would, but I bruise like a peach.
158
00:10:25,916 --> 00:10:29,836
Besides, you know, everything's
gonna be fine. The baby's sleeping.
159
00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:32,881
- What if she jumps out of the bassinet?
- Can't hold her own head up.
160
00:10:33,049 --> 00:10:34,257
But, yeah, jumped.
161
00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:37,260
Oh, my God.
I left the water running.
162
00:10:37,428 --> 00:10:41,306
You did not leave the water running.
Please, pull yourself together, okay?
163
00:10:41,515 --> 00:10:45,810
- Well, did I leave the stove on?
- You haven't cooked since 1996.
164
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:49,773
Is the window open? If the window's
open a bird could fly in and...
165
00:10:49,982 --> 00:10:51,858
Oh, my God, you know what?
I think you're right.
166
00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:53,443
- Listen.
- What? What?
167
00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:58,031
A pigeon. No. No, wait, no.
An eagle flew in.
168
00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:02,118
Landed on the stove and caught fire.
169
00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:10,377
The baby, seeing this, jumps across
the apartment to the mighty bird's aid.
170
00:11:10,544 --> 00:11:13,380
The eagle, however, misconstrues this
as an act of aggression...
171
00:11:13,547 --> 00:11:15,256
...and grabs the baby in its talon.
172
00:11:15,424 --> 00:11:18,677
Meanwhile, the faucet
fills the apartment with water.
173
00:11:18,844 --> 00:11:22,347
Baby and bird, still ablaze,
are locked in a death grip...
174
00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:27,352
...swirling around the whirlpool
that fills the apartment.
175
00:11:28,896 --> 00:11:31,231
Boy, are you gonna be sorry
if that's true.
176
00:11:35,861 --> 00:11:37,570
- Hello.
- Hi.
177
00:11:37,780 --> 00:11:39,698
It's been an hour.
178
00:11:39,865 --> 00:11:43,868
The maitre d' asked if you'd reconsider
switching to a smaller table.
179
00:11:44,161 --> 00:11:45,662
Maybe we should just eat now.
180
00:11:45,830 --> 00:11:49,457
You can't order until the entire
party's arrived. Restaurant policy.
181
00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:52,585
Well, how about this?
Another table leaves, right...
182
00:11:52,753 --> 00:11:55,797
...but there's still some food left
on their plates.
183
00:11:55,965 --> 00:11:59,426
Okay, what's the restaurant's policy
about people eating that?
184
00:11:59,635 --> 00:12:02,554
- It's frowned upon.
- But it happens.
185
00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:08,560
- All right, I gotta go to the bathroom.
- No, you can't go.
186
00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:10,979
No, no, no.
I can't hold this table on my own.
187
00:12:11,147 --> 00:12:13,189
If they ask me to move, I'll cave.
188
00:12:13,399 --> 00:12:15,358
Well, if you ask me to stay, I'll pee.
189
00:12:21,490 --> 00:12:23,992
Good evening, miss.
190
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:26,911
Miss?
191
00:12:28,914 --> 00:12:31,291
Miss? Miss?
192
00:12:31,459 --> 00:12:36,045
Okay, fine, I'll move. All right.
You don't have to manhandle me.
193
00:12:37,047 --> 00:12:40,550
Where? Okay.
194
00:12:41,051 --> 00:12:42,719
Thank you.
195
00:12:43,262 --> 00:12:44,846
Wow.
196
00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:52,937
Finally, you guys made it.
197
00:12:59,945 --> 00:13:01,279
Pheebs, who the hell...? Ah!
198
00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:12,540
Spend more time with the tie.
That'll make a baby.
199
00:13:13,375 --> 00:13:17,670
Look, I can't do this. I can't make love
to you while we're fighting this way.
200
00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:20,173
Oh, sure. Now you're Mr. Sensitivity.
201
00:13:20,341 --> 00:13:23,009
But when you wanted to have sex
right after my uncle's funeral...
202
00:13:23,219 --> 00:13:25,303
That was a celebration of life.
203
00:13:26,806 --> 00:13:28,598
All right, look, I'm not gonna do this.
204
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:31,309
Is this the way you want our baby
to be conceived?
205
00:13:32,728 --> 00:13:34,771
No, you're right.
206
00:13:35,648 --> 00:13:37,649
Yeah, we shouldn't do it like this.
207
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:43,530
For what it's worth, I'm sorry.
208
00:13:43,697 --> 00:13:46,991
I shouldn't have come down on you
so hard about the smoking.
209
00:13:47,284 --> 00:13:51,162
So you had a few cigarettes.
It's not the end of the world.
210
00:13:51,372 --> 00:13:53,957
- Really?
- Yeah.
211
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:56,459
You are incredible.
212
00:13:56,627 --> 00:13:59,170
And listen,
I'm not gonna smoke again.
213
00:13:59,338 --> 00:14:02,423
And if I do, I promise
I will hide it so much better from you.
214
00:14:10,057 --> 00:14:12,058
- Do you want to?
- Yeah, let's celebrate life.
215
00:14:12,226 --> 00:14:13,810
Okay.
216
00:14:15,604 --> 00:14:17,772
Oh, God.
217
00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,816
Oh, thank God you're okay.
218
00:14:20,025 --> 00:14:22,485
I'm sorry we left you.
Mommy will never leave you again.
219
00:14:22,653 --> 00:14:25,697
Never, ever, ever again.
220
00:14:26,073 --> 00:14:27,740
Great. So let's get going.
221
00:14:29,285 --> 00:14:32,579
Oh, no. I mean it. After what just happened,
I'm never leaving her again.
222
00:14:32,788 --> 00:14:35,540
I understand. Separation is hard.
223
00:14:35,708 --> 00:14:39,711
One time I was about to leave Ross
to go to the beauty parlor.
224
00:14:39,879 --> 00:14:42,630
And he got so upset
he took off all his clothes...
225
00:14:42,798 --> 00:14:46,050
...tucked his willy between his legs...
226
00:14:46,218 --> 00:14:51,055
...and cried out,
"Mommy, I'm a girl. Take me with you."
227
00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:02,984
Somehow, over time,
it got easier to be apart from you.
228
00:15:05,571 --> 00:15:07,280
Ah.
229
00:15:08,115 --> 00:15:11,075
You are welcome.
230
00:15:12,286 --> 00:15:15,496
- You know what? Let's not talk.
- What?
231
00:15:15,706 --> 00:15:19,167
- I am still so mad at you for smoking.
- But you said you forgave me.
232
00:15:19,335 --> 00:15:21,169
It was just a couple of cigarettes,
no big deal.
233
00:15:21,378 --> 00:15:23,212
Oh, blah-blah-blah-blah.
234
00:15:24,256 --> 00:15:28,801
I was ovulating and you said you wouldn't
have sex with me if we were fighting.
235
00:15:29,678 --> 00:15:35,391
- You tricked me to get me into bed?
- That's right. I got mine.
236
00:15:37,895 --> 00:15:40,730
I feel so used.
237
00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:45,485
Well, I guess they're not coming.
You want to just order?
238
00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:48,196
Thank you.
239
00:15:51,575 --> 00:15:54,953
Waiter? All right, this is gonna
go fast, so try to keep up.
240
00:15:55,162 --> 00:15:57,246
Risotto with shaved truffles
and the rib steak...
241
00:15:57,414 --> 00:15:59,958
...with the golden chanterelles
and the Bordelaise sauce...
242
00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:03,628
...unless any of that stuff I just said
means "snails."
243
00:16:03,963 --> 00:16:07,298
- It does not.
- Tomato tart...
244
00:16:07,466 --> 00:16:09,467
...and, um, which of the pastas
would you recommend?
245
00:16:09,677 --> 00:16:12,470
- Oh, well, they're both exquis...
- Both it is. Thank you.
246
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,847
Oh, uh, can I make a special request?
247
00:16:15,015 --> 00:16:16,891
Can you bring everything
as soon as it's ready?
248
00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:18,601
Appetizers, entrées, we don't care.
249
00:16:18,769 --> 00:16:20,019
- Hey.
- Hi. Hi.
250
00:16:22,106 --> 00:16:25,400
- I'll just wait to put your order in.
- You guys are over an hour late.
251
00:16:25,567 --> 00:16:27,735
- What happened to you two?
- So sorry.
252
00:16:27,903 --> 00:16:31,280
- We got locked out of the apartment.
- That's a great story. Can I eat it?
253
00:16:32,324 --> 00:16:35,243
And then Rachel wasn't sure
she could leave the baby.
254
00:16:35,411 --> 00:16:38,871
It wasn't easy, but it's your birthday
and I did what I had to do.
255
00:16:39,123 --> 00:16:41,541
And that's Judy over there at the bar
with Emma?
256
00:16:45,379 --> 00:16:48,423
This is for the best. I'm not distracted,
worrying about Emma...
257
00:16:48,590 --> 00:16:52,218
...how she's doing at home, and I'm
gonna be completely here with you.
258
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:53,720
- Oh, she spit up.
- What?
259
00:16:53,887 --> 00:16:57,098
She spit up. Judy? She spit...
Judy, look alive, Judy.
260
00:17:00,436 --> 00:17:02,937
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
261
00:17:03,689 --> 00:17:07,775
- Ooh.
- Whew, everything looks delicious.
262
00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:11,738
What should I have?
What should I have?
263
00:17:11,905 --> 00:17:15,783
Never hit a woman.
Never hit a woman.
264
00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:18,703
I know what you mean,
this looks incredible.
265
00:17:18,912 --> 00:17:21,789
Ross bruises like a peach.
He bruises like a peach.
266
00:17:22,958 --> 00:17:25,209
Okay, I'll have the fig salad
and the duck.
267
00:17:25,419 --> 00:17:27,211
I'll have the, uh, soup and the salmon.
268
00:17:27,421 --> 00:17:29,380
Remember, whatever comes up first,
okay?
269
00:17:29,548 --> 00:17:30,923
- And hurry...
- Happy birthday.
270
00:17:31,133 --> 00:17:32,258
Son of a bitch.
271
00:17:33,427 --> 00:17:36,512
- Where have you been?
- Well, we had a little fight.
272
00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:38,681
I would never lie
to get someone into bed.
273
00:17:38,849 --> 00:17:42,477
You used to tell girls
you were a Kennedy.
274
00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:46,481
Thanks.
275
00:17:47,983 --> 00:17:50,735
Thanks. Wow.
276
00:17:50,903 --> 00:17:53,780
A little tight, isn't it?
Why didn't you get a bigger table?
277
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:59,285
You had a big table
but they made you move.
278
00:17:59,453 --> 00:18:00,912
Ha, ha. Shut up, Monica.
279
00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:07,085
Oh, well, I suppose that Chandler
will have the smoked duck.
280
00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:13,591
And I suppose that Monica
will have the manipulative shrew.
281
00:18:13,801 --> 00:18:16,302
- I'll give you another minute.
- What, where you going?
282
00:18:16,512 --> 00:18:19,138
He said she wanted the shrew.
283
00:18:20,307 --> 00:18:22,100
Rach, come on, Emma's fine.
284
00:18:22,309 --> 00:18:26,479
You're turning into an obsessive mother,
okay? You need to stop.
285
00:18:27,064 --> 00:18:31,859
You guys ever hear the story about
when Ross' mom went to the beauty salon?
286
00:18:33,153 --> 00:18:38,074
- You mean the willy story?
- Ha, ha. They already know it.
287
00:18:41,829 --> 00:18:43,955
We've been waiting for you
for a long time.
288
00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:45,623
- Maybe you should order.
- That's okay.
289
00:18:45,791 --> 00:18:48,668
- I told the waiter what they want.
- Why would you do that?
290
00:18:48,877 --> 00:18:51,212
Chandler, control your woman.
291
00:18:52,047 --> 00:18:54,590
Okay, well...
Everybody has ordered.
292
00:18:54,758 --> 00:19:01,430
I would like to start the celebration
and make a toast to Phoebe.
293
00:19:01,598 --> 00:19:04,976
- She dropped her sock.
- Aw. What?
294
00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:08,688
- No. No, Emma dropped her sock.
- Mom's here?
295
00:19:08,897 --> 00:19:12,900
I wanted to have lunch with her today.
She told me she was out of town.
296
00:19:13,110 --> 00:19:16,154
Ross, she still has not noticed
that the baby's sock is on the ground.
297
00:19:16,363 --> 00:19:18,656
It's a good toast.
298
00:19:18,866 --> 00:19:21,492
Look, will you please get her attention?
299
00:19:22,327 --> 00:19:24,620
Mommy?
300
00:19:33,672 --> 00:19:35,756
Oh, for God's sake, Judy,
pick up the sock.
301
00:19:35,924 --> 00:19:39,010
Pick up the sock! Pick up the sock!
302
00:19:43,265 --> 00:19:45,266
I'm sorry, was that rude?
303
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:49,353
Did my little outburst...
304
00:19:49,563 --> 00:19:53,733
...blunt the hideousness
that is this evening?
305
00:19:53,942 --> 00:19:55,818
Look, I know you all
have a lot going on...
306
00:19:55,986 --> 00:20:01,908
...but all I wanted to do was have dinner
with my friends on my birthday.
307
00:20:02,075 --> 00:20:05,745
And you are all so late, and you
didn't even have the courtesy to call.
308
00:20:08,665 --> 00:20:11,959
Well, it's too late now.
309
00:20:12,336 --> 00:20:13,878
Yeah, Pheebs, I don't think that's us.
310
00:20:14,171 --> 00:20:19,550
Oh, well, this is... This is not over.
Hello?
311
00:20:21,637 --> 00:20:25,431
- What is going on with you two?
- Well, you see, I'm ovulating.
312
00:20:25,599 --> 00:20:28,226
Oh, yeah, that's what she says.
313
00:20:29,102 --> 00:20:34,023
But maybe you're not ovulating at all.
Maybe it's a clever ruse to get me into bed.
314
00:20:34,691 --> 00:20:38,861
Yeah, Smokey, that's what it was.
I just can't get enough.
315
00:20:39,529 --> 00:20:41,322
You're not gonna believe this. She lied.
316
00:20:41,490 --> 00:20:43,741
She tricked me into having sex with her.
317
00:20:44,243 --> 00:20:47,453
So? You got to have sex, right?
318
00:20:47,913 --> 00:20:49,956
What's the matter with me?
Why am I such a girl?
319
00:20:52,709 --> 00:20:56,045
- Okay. That was Mike.
- Oh, Phoebe, honey, we are so sorry.
320
00:20:56,213 --> 00:20:59,423
You are totally right.
We are here 100 percent...
321
00:20:59,591 --> 00:21:02,969
...and we love you, and we are ready
to start your birthday celebration.
322
00:21:03,178 --> 00:21:06,347
Oh. You guys,
that means the world to me.
323
00:21:09,476 --> 00:21:10,935
Okay, I'm gonna take off.
324
00:21:12,938 --> 00:21:14,188
What?
325
00:21:14,356 --> 00:21:16,774
Oh, I love you guys too,
but Mike got off work early.
326
00:21:16,942 --> 00:21:18,776
Wait.
327
00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:23,489
Wait. I'm not the... I'm not the kind of girl
that just ditches her friends...
328
00:21:23,657 --> 00:21:25,908
...to be with her boyfriend.
329
00:21:26,118 --> 00:21:27,410
You know what? I am.
330
00:21:28,328 --> 00:21:30,830
Bye, guys. Judy. Bye.
331
00:21:32,624 --> 00:21:35,001
Oh, thank God. If Phoebe's gone,
can we take Emma home?
332
00:21:35,168 --> 00:21:39,255
That's a good idea. Our babysitter
just pounded another chardonnay.
333
00:21:39,423 --> 00:21:40,673
- Bye, you guys.
- Bye.
334
00:21:40,841 --> 00:21:44,510
See you. Well, I guess it's just us.
335
00:21:48,265 --> 00:21:52,685
So I'm probably still ovulating.
Do you wanna give it another try?
336
00:21:52,936 --> 00:21:56,147
So you've never had sex
with a Kennedy, have you?
337
00:21:57,399 --> 00:21:59,567
- You're gonna go do it?
- We don't have much time.
338
00:21:59,735 --> 00:22:01,902
Once the egg descends into the
fallopian tube...
339
00:22:02,112 --> 00:22:03,946
Whoa, whoa, get out of here.
340
00:22:08,285 --> 00:22:11,662
I sincerely hope the rest of your party
is returning.
341
00:22:11,872 --> 00:22:14,206
No, just me. All alone.
342
00:22:18,712 --> 00:22:21,672
Dinner for six for one.
343
00:22:22,215 --> 00:22:25,676
Well, you boys are about
to see something really special.
344
00:22:39,274 --> 00:22:41,025
- How was everything, sir?
- Excellent.
345
00:22:41,193 --> 00:22:44,445
The shrew, in particular, was exquisite.
346
00:22:45,572 --> 00:22:47,198
Well, I hope you've got some room left.
347
00:22:47,407 --> 00:22:50,659
Happy birthday to you
348
00:22:50,827 --> 00:22:53,496
Happy birthday to you
349
00:22:53,663 --> 00:22:55,664
Happy birthday, dear
350
00:22:55,832 --> 00:22:56,999
Joey. Joey.
351
00:22:57,167 --> 00:22:58,793
Joey
352
00:22:59,044 --> 00:23:02,171
Happy birthday to you
353
00:23:02,339 --> 00:23:04,965
This is the best birthday ever.
29378