All language subtitles for Now.Is.Good.2012.720p.BluRay.H264.AAC-RARBG

Moments...

This is one.

This right here, right now,
is definitely a moment.

Tessa?

Anything could happen next.

- Tessa?
- What?

You're not listening to me.

I am listening to you.

What did I just say?

I wasn't listening to you.

I'm saying this is
a big night for you.

Number one on the list.

There is no list.

You were gonna make a list.

I haven't started.

Then start now. Go on.

Right. So, which one do you want?
Because I really don't mind.

The blond one.

The blond one? You're sure?

You want him? Like I said,
I don't mind. Just...

You can have the blond one.

Only if you're sure.

Zo...
What, babe?

If I do this with someone I don't
know, does that make me a slag?

It makes you alive.

So, that club, are you
guys regulars there?

No. You?

Sometimes, you know.

Right.

Is there anywhere
else we can go?

Do you want a cup of tea?
Or coffee?

Sure, yeah. Either.

We haven't
actually got any coffee.

Okay.

I can't find the tea.

Water's fine.

So, what's your favorite...

Do you want to kiss me?

God, yeah.

Jesus Christ!
It's okay.

Jesus bloody Christ!
It's fine.

What happened?

This girl's head... Her
head came off in my hand!

What are you laughing at?
It's not funny.

Scared the piss out of me.
Whoo!

So, do you often
go out in disguise?

The hair hat and all.

I got given it. I was ill.

Are you better now?

All better.

Oh.

Aren't we supposed to do
that for a bit longer?

I'm ready now.

Wait, wait. Can you just
look at me for one second?

This is my first time.

Wow. That's amazing.

Obviously it's not yours.

Stop talking now.

Yeah, not like this.

What?

Sorry. Not gonna happen.

You're shitting me.
You come this far, and...

I'm sorry. Really.

Whatever.

Okay.

Okay.

I will love you
till the end of time

I would wait a million years

Promise you'll remember
that you're mine

Baby, can you see
through the tears?

Love you more
than those bitches before

Say you'll remember,
Say you'll remember

Baby, who

I will love you
till the end of time

Big dreams, gangsta

Said you had to leave
to start your life over

I was like, no, please,

Stay here, we don't need no
money, we could make it all work

But he headed out on Sunday

Said he'd come home Monday

I stay up waitin',
anticipatin', and pacing'

But he was chasing paper

Caught up in the game
that was the last I heard

I will love you
till the end of time

I would wait a million years

Promise you'll remember
that you're mine

Baby, can you see
through the tears?

Love you more
than those bitches before

Say you'll remember,
Say you'll remember

Baby, who

I will love you
till the end of time

Love you more
than those bitches before

Say you'll remember,
Say you'll remember

Baby, who

I will love you
till the end of time ?

Thanks.
Thank you.

I don't understand it.
I just don't get it.

You always tell me everything.

I never tell you anything.

Why don't you start now? What
were you doing last night?

Keep asking, Dad.
The 15th time is the charm.

Hi, I'm Caroline, Richard's producer.
We spoke on the phone.

Hi. Good to
meet you in person.

And this must be Tessa.

That's me!

The lift's not working.
Can she manage the stairs?

Yeah, she'll be fine.

Okay.

Tessa Scott and her father.

- Hi, guys. Take a seat.
- Hello.

Really pleased to be here.

Yeah, we're big fans.

Great. We'll just
have a little chat.

Be as natural as you can and
I'll help you through. Okay?

So, what's your
angle going to be?

Is it the whole
dying girl thing,

or do you have
something original planned?

Sorry?

Tessa.

I know it's heavy stuff, but let's
try to keep it upbeat. Yeah?

And now I'm delighted to have
as my guest in the studio

a very brave young
lady indeed, Tessa Scott.

Tessa's been living with leukemia
for the past four years,

and she's here with
her dad to talk about it.

Tell us, when did you realize
that Tessa was first ill?

Four years ago.

She had, well,
we thought it was the flu,

Tessa's mum and I.

But the flu just
wouldn't clear up.

The blood test
confirmed our worst fears.

The doctors told
us they couldn't

hold out any hope
for her survival,

which brought us
to the point where

Tessa felt like
she had no choice

but to end her
chemotherapy entirely.

Tessa, you chose to
give up the treatment.

That's a big
decision for a 17-year-old.

If I may...

The more aggressive treatments,

they would have only slightly

prolonged Tessa's life.

There are other ways
to maintain her health.

Dad... For example,
studies have shown

that good nutrition can
rebalance a system entirely.

That's why we're here really,
to raise awareness, and...

Dad...
What?

He's gonna have
to stop sometime.

Stop what, Tessa?

He knows it's gonna happen.

But he can't stop
hoping that it won't.

It's true that if
I kept going with the chemo,

I'd probably live a bit longer.

But it made me feel so bad.

And there are things
I want to do before I die.

Things?

Yeah. I've got a list.

Oh. Your dad
didn't mention that.

That's 'cause
he doesn't know about it.

Most of what's
on it is illegal.

I'm almost scared to ask.

Well, I nearly
had sex last night,

which isn't actually technically
against the law of course,

but it was so crap the guy
should be arrested anyway.

Okay, I think that's
all we've got time for.

Next I'm planning
to take drugs.

Do you have
any advice which ones?

That's enough, Tessa.

Very amusing.

Sex and drugs
and rock 'n' roll.

Ladies and gents,
I think you'll agree

there is a young lady
taking life by the horns.

Thank you very much,
Tessa and her dad.

Thank you.

And now the weather.
Squally this morning,

rounding up this afternoon
and clearing

for the rest of the week.

She's out.
No.

Dad...

Wait.

Bad night?

There's no such thing.

Hello, darlings. Come on in.

Hi, Mum.

You look stressed.

Blame her. Back at 4:00.

It's a new trick, Mum.
I can make a coin disappear.

Do you want to see it?

No, darling.
Not before coffee.

Nothing before the coffee.
Show your sister.

She's never interested.
She doesn't care.

I'm sure she does.

I really don't.

Why don't you go and watch
CBeebies or something?

Because I'm nine.

I heard you on the radio.

You met a boy.

Tessa, promise me
you'll always use a condom.

I know the smell of
rubber can be off-putting,

but, then, so is gonorrhea.

Please stop. My panic attack
is having a panic attack.

And don't have casual sex.

Really?

No, darling.

You must always, always
try as hard as you can.

I've got to get a tattoo.

And I want one and all.

Over my whole body, of myself.

And taller, with bigger tits.

What's up?

He's such a bloody liar.

Who?
Scott.

Said he had a stall here.

Is that why we came?

I can't believe
he'd blow me off.

I gave him
the ride of his life.

Zo...
Wanker.

Zo...
What?

He's right there.

Hey, handsome.

What's up?

I don't know. You tell me.

Or better yet, show me.

Hey.

Hey.

How are you?

I'm fine.

I know I left you hanging the
other night and I just wanted...

No, it was my fault.

What?

I just...
I could've been a bit more...

She told you.

What?

You did, didn't you?
You told him about me.

Shouldn't have done that.

Tessa, wait!

Tessa!

Hey. You missed lunch.

You eat it.

What are you
doing with all this?

There's a bonfire in
the garden next door.

Don't do that.
Please don't do that.

If you don't want
these things, I do.

That's Spain.
You were in remission.

A boy whistled at me,
and you took that.

Said I'd never want to
forget my first whistle.

Yeah.

But I do.

What are you doing?

Do you mind?

Feel very free.

I'm Adam.

And you're Tessa.

I've seen you around,
since we moved here.

I meant to
introduce myself, but...

They're not love letters.

It's none of my business.

I'm just saying. I didn't
get dumped or anything.

I wouldn't have thought so.

Anyway,
I've got more stuff to burn.

Cool, whack it on.

This is going.

Probably best.
That's a dangerous dress.

Are you okay?

Tessa?

All right, don't move. Don't
move. I think you fainted.

Are you diabetic?

Do you need sugar?

Have some of this.

It's flat.

You're tough to please.

You say that like
it's a bad thing.

Okay, excellent. Not embarrassed,
not embarrassed at all.

No, it's cool, all right?

I mean, I've never had that
effect on someone before.

I kind of like it.

This is a nice garden.

Thanks. It's kind of my thing.
It keeps my mum happy.

How about your dad?

It's just the two of us.

I should get home.
All right. You need help?

It's not exactly far.

So, anytime you've got
something to burn...

Or I just want to pass out
in front of someone...

You know where to come.

Yes, I do.

When Tessa dies,
can we go on holiday?

Cal, that's an awful
thing to say.

I don't even
remember going to Spain.

It was so long ago,
it might not even be true.

Cal, that's enough.
Go to your room.

Dad...
What's wrong?

Get out!

What did I say that was wrong?

It's all very confusing.

No, it's not.

This is your day.

And what does that mean?

That I'll do whatever you want.

Buy more things?

Sure.

Where does the money come from?

A credit card.

Buy now, pay later.

Or you know, not.

Watch where you're flying. You
almost poked the guy's eye out.

I wish I could fly for real.

Yeah?

Amazing!

That was better than
the best thing ever!

Can I go again?

I think it's your sister's go.

I'm good, I'm just watching.

Are you sure?
Yeah.

She's sick. She can't
do this kind of thing.

All right, mate, well, let's
get you hooked up again.

Actually, you know what?

I will have a crack.

Ready?
Ready.

Tessa, I don't know
if this is a good idea.

Is she okay?

She's fine.

She just doesn't
want it to end.

It wasn't your money.

She's late.

Do you hear what I'm saying?

She promised she'd come.

Tessa...

Do you want Cal to
return everything?

Why should he be punished?

What are you doing?

Is this to do with your list?

I don't have a list.

You told that
radio guy you had a list.

He was a knob.

Yeah, he was a knob.

You were still more honest
with him than you are with me.

How do you think
that makes me feel?

I don't give
a crap how you feel.

She's not coming.
Let's do this.

Tessa, there'll be
a slight pinch and burn,

then the anesthetic
will kick in. All right?

Good.

Now, I wiggle up and down

to break the tissue
around the insertion point.

She may feel a slight tugging
across the chest,

but once the line
detaches from the cuff,

it will simply slide away.

Now, of course I can
reinsert the catheter

should you wish to
recommence your treatment.

I'm saying you can
change your mind.

I won't change my mind.

Dad?

She won't change her mind.

All right then.

Hold that for me.

Good girl.

Do you want to slap my rump?

What? No.

Then don't talk to me
like I'm a horse.

Yes.

Sorry.

Hey, it's done now. It's done.

You know what to look out for?

Yeah. Chill, fever,
stiff neck or headache.

Drainage, bleeding,
loss of strength.

You're good.

Thanks for all your help.

She likes you.

I doubt that.

I mean it.
You're bang in there.

You should definitely
ask her out or something.

Tessa! Tessa, wait, I'm here.
I'm coming. Stay there.

Oh, God, did I miss it?
I left on time.

But there was
this insane traffic.

I definitely left on time.
I just...

Sure, whatever.

Tessa...

I don't care.

Oh, don't be like that.

How do you expect her to be?

I'm sorry, this has
what to do with you?

Is that a serious question?
Yes, it's a serious...

Enough.

You both suck.

One of you is this
cancer obsessive,

and the other
can't even face showing up

at the hospital, which is fine,

I get it.

But neither of you
are what I need.

You're just wasting my time.

All I'm saying... This is
not gonna be all you say.

All I'm saying is...
There'll be another thing.

All I'm saying is, you don't
have to stay in on my account.

You could go out and see
your friends more often.

And that's all I'm saying.
Okay. Okay.

I've just taken drugs.

Excellent.
Have you met my mum?

Hi.

Hi.

Mushrooms is all I did,
which are natural.

If not strictly legal.

My friend did
buy some ketamine,

but she thought
the dealer was a bit skanky,

so we've gone with
the shrooms instead.

See you inside.

That went well.

I thought so.

How much did you take?

Not much.

I don't know, I'm not really
that clued up on the stuff.

Yeah, me neither.

Look, I'll drive you somewhere.
Keep you out of trouble.

I'm not sure how long
it takes to kick in.

About that long.

Seven shooting stars
in one night

The water and sand
in our eyesight

The rocks in our hands
preparing for flight

The lack of sleeping
but it's all right

And it's all

And it's all right

And it's all

And it's all right

And it's all ?

Don't be afraid.

What?
What?

What did you say?

All right,
we could hang out here.

There's no one around,
so you guys can go crazy.

I don't want to go crazy.

I don't have to
go crazy at all.

I'll just be up here.

What are you doing?

All right. Get down.

Come on, get down, off the roof.
No.

Come on, get down. Please.

Why? Are you gonna make me?

No, I'm just gonna tell you.
Get down.

Fine. All right?
Thank you.

Harshing my buzz.

Where's Tessa?

What?

We gotta go after her.

We didn't see
which way she went.

We need to find her. Now.

She'll come back.
I mean, it's no big thing.

We're just out here.
There's no danger.

Yes, there is.

Why? Zoey...

This time I'm really
not supposed to tell you.

Not supposed to tell me what?

Tessa!

Tessa!

Tessa!

Tessa!

I've discovered something.

Are you okay?
Can you get down?

I don't want to.

All right, just wait.

Just hold on, I'm coming.

Just hold on.

Tessa...

You need to come
down now, please.

You need to let me
help you climb down.

I'm going to
tell you something.

But you have to promise
not to tell anyone, okay?

I'm not sick here.

I'm not sick anymore.

I just need to stay
here in this wood.

I need to keep away from the
modern world and all its gadgets

and then I won't be sick.

You can stay
with me if you want.

I'd like it if you did.

We'll build things,
shelters and tracks.

We'll grow vegetables.

We'll be safe.

Tessa...
No.

Please. Don't say anything.

Tessa?

What?

Will I still be
a brother when you're dead?

I'll still be around.

Are you going to haunt me?

Not if you don't want me to.

Just I might be a bit scared.

The nurse is here. Dad says
come down when you're ready.

Enjoying your cake?

Mmm.

It's lovely.
Thank you, Tessa.

I'm Philippa.

You don't look like
you're feeling too good.

Would you be?

Take nothing personally. She was
rude to last week's nurse, too.

Sian, I think she was called.

Don't pretend you've forgotten
her name, Dad.

You asked her to stay
for supper. She said no.

I'll be next door.

He does everything wrong.

How does that make you feel?

It makes me laugh.

You know,
there are support groups.

Places you can meet people
in the same position as you.

I went to one of those.

Met a cool girl called Angela.

So why not talk
to her about all this?

Because she died.

Last time I make that mistake.

Are we done?

Hey.

Hey.

You don't have to
look at me like that.

I'm just dying.
It's not contagious.

How are you feeling today?

Can I come for a ride?

Do you always answer a question
with another question?

Does that annoy you?

Bit tricky to ride
this at the minute.

I thought I'd strip the
engine down, give it a clean.

And now you can't
put it back together.

What do you mean?
I can, no trouble.

Just so long as this
bit wasn't important.

Where did you say
we were going again?

I didn't.

What?

A good long cross-country hike.
Excellent.

Because my big problem
is too much energy to burn.

Nearly there.

It's worth it, yeah?

Yes.

So, what's the story
with you and your mum?

My dad died last year.
He was hit by a car.

I had a place at college,
but I had to defer it.

You should still go.

I don't know. I kind of...

I'm not sure I was
ready for it anyway.

Are you afraid?

It comes and goes.

Most people think
that when you're sick

you become fearless and brave,

but you don't.

Most of the time it's like
being stalked by a psycho,

like I might get
shot any second.

Sometimes I forget
about it for hours.

What makes you forget?

When I was with you
in the wood,

I didn't think about it
for the whole afternoon.

Look at me.

I'm not thinking about it now.

So, why don't you want to go?

I shouldn't have said anything.

Genie's out of the bottle now.

Whose party is it?

I'm not sure.

You didn't get invited?

That's not really how it works.

But all your mates are going?

I guess, yeah.

I just haven't done
this stuff in a while.

Makes two of us.

Hey, so, do you just
want to hang out here?

I'll get us something to drink.

Yeah.

Or come with me?

I'll come with you.

Hey, there he is!

Hi, guys...

Sorry to bother you,

it's just
we used to know someone

who looked just
like your friend here.

I'm Tessa.
It's nice to meet you.

If you're the one that got
him out of the house,

it's good to meet you, too.

How's college?

You don't even have to
pretend to learn anything.

You should try it.
Yeah, I will, sometime.

Are you drinking this?

Yeah, actually...

Yeah, it's good, I think, just
to pop in to parties like that.

Don't want to outstay
a welcome, do you?

You got a pretty big one there.
You should get out more.

Well, then they wouldn't care
when I walked in, would they?

Did that girl hurt you?

Other way round.

I caught her fist
a good one with my chin,

then whacked her right in
the knee with my nose.

You need to be careful.

No, I don't.

That's the thing.

Here you go then.

How do you mean?

This is you.
No, bollocks, no way.

I'll walk you to your door.

Are you sure?
Yeah, of course, no trouble.

See?

Thank you.

Hey.

Hello.

You dropped a fiver.

What?

That fiver. You dropped it.

That's not mine.

I saw it come
out of your pocket.

Really?
Yeah.

'Cause I was looking.

Okay, well, thanks.

That was so cool.
It totally was.

We rock as criminals. That
flirty eye thing you were doing.

What about you nipping in there
with the perfect timing?

So now what?

Now we get some
cash out and party.

With the card?
Right.

Okay. What's the number?

What do you mean?

Didn't you see the number?

No, I was doing
the flirty eye thing.

I was nipping in there.

We suck as criminals.

Probably best.
The guy seemed all right.

Maybe we should try
and give his card back.

And how are we
going to do that?

Not interrupting anything,
am I? Get...

Tessa...
What?

The card.
What about it?

Give it back to him!

Scott plays it cool.
I know he's crazy about me.

How'd you know?

Because he's a guy.

I'll take your word for it.

So, why didn't he
call me last night?

Zo, there's something
I need to tell you.

Let's get this done first.

Remember, shoplifting's
all about confidence.

Walk tall, pick and pocket.

In there, we go in separate.

Why not together?

More suspicious. Go on.

Right.

Tessa? Tessa Scott?

No. Sorry.

It is you.

Don't you remember us?
From school.

Oh, yeah.

You left in Year 11,
didn't you?

Ten.

So how's it going? Are you still
having all that treatment?

Not anymore.

So you're better?

No.

What do you two want?

Hi, Zoey.
You helping her shop?

Are you ready to go?
Yeah.

Is it true you've been
seeing Scott Redmond?

What's it to you?
Do you know him?

All right, let's go.

Everybody knows him.

He went out with my sister
for about half an hour.

Is that right?

I have to go collect
the invites for my funeral.

Really?
Yeah.

I also need to
sort out the readings.

Make sure it's not that bloody poem.
It's been done to death.

Let go of me.

They're idiots, Zo.
They don't know anything.

I know.

I have to go find him.

NOW?

Yeah. I'm sorry.
I need to go.

Hey!

Another one!
Stop her too!

Gotcha.

Sit down.

Empty your pockets.

Well, I'd call that evidence,
wouldn't you?

Name. Address.
Parents' phone numbers.

Don't call my dad.

We have a choice.

We can call him,
or we can call the police.

The police, every time.

Now, I told that guy out there
I'd handle it, and if you...

Listen...

This is a portacath.

It's an access disk
for medical treatments.

I have acute
lymphoblastic leukemia.

Please put your shirt back on.

Do you know what acute
lymphoblastic leukemia is?

No, I'm afraid I don't.

It's cancer.

I still have to call your dad.

And you, what's your excuse?

What did she take?

One Clearblue
Home Pregnancy Test.

Was this on the list?
Shoplifting?

What are you doing, Tessa?

What are you doing?

As much as I can.
As fast as I can.

I wish you'd stop.

You'd prefer I spend
the rest of my life

huddled in
a blanket on the sofa,

with my head on your shoulder.

Yeah, I would.
Can you blame me?

Yes, I would.

My point is... Well, my point
is, I like a strong woman.

You've always wanted
to be carried to bed.

I have always wanted
to be carried to bed.

What I don't do,
is bring to a mate's party

an, admittedly perfectly
formed, young pixie warlock.

Yeah, she's isn't a warlock.

I mean you can't just go around

starting fights every which way

and shaking
things up like that.

Apparently you can.

What are you doing here?

I've been stalking you all day.

I only just now plucked up
the courage to reveal myself.

Really?

No.

My dad's in the health food store.
He could drive past.

It's nice to see
your mates again.

Yeah. Always a pleasure.

Well,
I'll see you around, maybe.

Sure, yeah.

I know you're looking.

I'm not looking.

Liar.

Perhaps you should think
about going back to school.

A bit of
normality in your life.

I'm not going back to school.

There's got to be some perks
to terminal illness.

I'm killing you, right?

Every day.

Watch out, mate.

Bloody idiot.

What's this guy up to?

Tessa, where are you going?
Tessa?

Tessa!

That was good.

A ride on a motorbike.

Should have been on my list.

What is? Name one.

Fame.

How famous do you want to be?

Enough for the whole world
to stop what it's doing

and personally come and say
goodbye to me when I die.

I think it's good you're not
asking too much there.

I just want to have my name
out there somewhere, you know.

You don't have to worry
about being forgotten, Tess.

Anything else?

Yeah.

What are you doing?

I just thought of another.

You're not gonna swim naked.

No way. You think I'm crazy?

Not naked.

Tess! Tess!

Okay, count of three, yeah?

What?

Just got to commit.
We just run in, full whack.

Deal.
Right.

Bollocks.
Here we go.

One, two, three!

You're evil! You are so evil!

How is it?

Yeah, actually really
gorgeous and lovely.

Really?

No. But go for it anyway.

Come on,
what are you scared of?

Nothing.

Okay, okay.

See, the great thing is,

I have actually always wondered

if it was possible to
dry yourself with a sock.

Thanks for doing that with me.

I wouldn't have
missed it for the world.

The stars are out.

Yeah.

See that group
of five up there?

The kind of curved shape.

See them? See them?

Yeah.

I've got no idea
what they're called.

Goon.

No.

What?

I'm sorry.

Don't you like me?

It's not that.

I don't think I can handle it.

I'll see you around.

Tess... Tess, wait. Come on.

Tessa, come on.

No, I've made a mistake.

What? What mistake?

You can't save me.

When you were a baby,

me and your mum used to lie awake
at night watching you breathe.

We were convinced
that if we stopped looking,

you'd forget how to do it.

As your kids get older, it's
a different kind of worry.

It never ever goes.

Please think about that.

You know, I kind of prefer it
when you give me shit.

Tessa?

Tessa?

Nurse!

Here, darling.

Okay, okay.

We'll soon have
that cleared up.

I'm sorry. Sorry.

It's okay, darling.

Hello, Tessa. How are you?

Good.

I think dignity's
overrated anyway.

We performed some
tests last night.

I'm afraid the cancer has
spread to your spinal fluid.

Things are progressing more
quickly than we first thought.

You've moved
further down the line.

How much further?

I would encourage you to
do the things you want to do.

I'm trying.

Enchanted Garden!

Whoo!

That was lovely.

Boring. Do another.

What do you want to do?
Should I do a rocket?

Yes! Do a rocket!

Okay.

Remind me again
why you're here.

Your father said he'd chop my
legs off if I didn't show up.

Ready, everybody?

Cover your ears,
this is gonna be aloud one.

Oh!

Okay.

Okay?

Okay.

Not bad.
What else you got in there?

Should I go for
a 21-shot Cascade?

Yes, do the Cascade!
I'll count.

Ready? Right, here we go.

One, two, three...

Three...

- Four...
- Four, five...

six, seven, eight, nine, 10.

Tessa...

What's the worst
that can happen?

It'll hurt.

It already hurts.

Zoey was right. I'm alive.

I'm alive.

Morning, Dad. Sleep well?

Who are you? What have you
done with my daughter?

Sit.

Eat. Drink coffee.

Dad, I want to
introduce someone.

Oh, God.

This is Adam. Adam, Dad.

It's good to meet you, sir.

You don't have to call him sir.

Sir will be fine.

Excellent. Who wants toast?

You can go.

And miss all the fun?

It's all right, Tess.

Sit down.
Yeah.

It's a terrible day
in an man's life

when his daughter
brings a boy home.

I always thought if I killed the
first one, word would get around.

Do you go to college?

Yeah, I had a place.

Then some stuff happened,
you know.

I know what happened.
I'm sorry for your loss.

Yeah.

How is your mum doing?

Some days she seems okay.
Yeah.

I used to think
that about Tessa.

You're aware of her condition?

Yeah, she's told me everything.

No, she hasn't.

If she wants you to
find her attractive,

then one thing she won't have
done is told you everything.

How old are you?

Why?

Because at your age, you shouldn't
have to be nursing someone.

Tessa doesn't need nursing.

Yes, she does.

And she will more and more.

And you, my young friend, you're
simply not up to the task.

So, why don't you
do us all a favor,

and piss off out of
what's left of her life.

So, how'd you get your dad
to lend you the car?

I thought you weren't
speaking to him.

I knew there was
a reason I forgot to ask.

Well, thanks for bringing me.

I thought it
would be full of girls

holding tissues
and looking gutted.

At least Scott
paid for privacy.

He'll get over it.

No, never.

He never will. He hates me.

Do you?

I'm just talking to them today.

About making
another appointment?

Yes. Yeah,
I want it gone, all right?

Zoey Walker?
We're ready for you now.

I just want it gone.

You hit that curb.

Wasn't my fault. The
road should have been straight.

There you go.

Tess, you know
I've got no choice.

You don't even know
what those words mean.

Why did you come if you were
just going to disapprove?

'Cause that's why you asked me.

Hey.

Evening.
That was my first drive.

First ever?

Well, then you did fantastic.

You think?

Yeah. Yeah, that's just how
changing gear is meant to sound.

It's my dad's car.
Deserves what it gets.

He's just trying
to keep you safe.

I think that ship
has sailed, don't you?

Would you like to
go on a date with me?

Just it occurred
to me we've never

actually been on a date,
like a proper one,

and I thought
that maybe we should.

You know, it doesn't have
to be right tonight, like now,

but, you know, the offer's
there, for anytime.

You just let me
know when suits.

Now is good.

Christ, Tessa.
You could have called.

What are you doing here?

Dad and Cal are looking for you.
Where have you been?

We'll have to talk
about it some other time.

Why?

'Cause I've got a date.

Yeah. She's here.

Not tonight.
Please, not tonight.

Okay, I've called your father. I've
told him not to worry. He's going...

Oh, my God.
It's just a nosebleed.

No, it's pumping out of you.
Tessa, I...

What should I do?
I don't know...

Here, take a towel.

Sit down.
Pinch your nose or something.

Oh, you need to go to hospital.

It'll stop in a minute.
I'm calling your father.

Should I call your father?
I don't know what to do.

Tell me what to do!
Just get me some ice.

What?
Ice!

A bag of frozen peas would
be best.

Right. Frozen peas.

There's sweet corn.
Is sweet corn okay?

Oh, Jesus.

You have to take me
to hospital.

I can't, Tessa. I think
your father should do this.

There isn't time.

Okay.

Yes. Ambulance, please.
Quickly. Quickly!

Who is it?
No.

Who is it?
He can't...

I need help.
Don't let him in.

No, I need help.

He can't see me like this!

Tess, I can't do this
on my own. I need help.

Coming.

Help me get her downstairs.

Come on. Are you gonna help?

Get him out! Please.

All right, just go.
We can manage. Go.

Would you hold that?

Thank you.

Adam.

She must be thirsty.
She's lost so much blood.

Should she have some water?
Should she?

Let's see what the doctor
says, all right.

Good. Here you are.

Right. Any signs of
thrombocytopenia before today?

Mum? Mum?

Sorry, me?

Has she complained
of a headache?

Have you noticed
any pinprick bruising?

I didn't look, to be honest.

When was the last
platelet transfusion?

I'm not sure. I can try...
I can try and find out.

Has she used any aspirin
products recently?

I don't know. I don't...

I'm sorry. I don't know the answers
to any of these questions.

My last platelet transfusion
was May 18th.

Okay, thank you. Don't talk.

Mum, get yourself round here,
and hold your daughter's hand.

Okay. Squeeze your mum's hand
once for yes, twice for no.

Understand? Don't talk.

Yes.

Any signs of thrombocytopenia?
Headaches? Bruising?

No.

Aspirin products? Bonjela? Teejel?
Anti-inflammatories?

No, none of those. No.

Good.

Now I'm afraid we're going to
need to cauterize your nose.

Have you been cauterized before?
Yes, she has.

Okay.
We'll check your platelets,

and then you're going to need
at least a couple of units.

A rough night, but you'll be
back home tomorrow.

We got there in the end.

They said it was a posterior nosebleed, the...
You know, the bad kind.

They had to pack
her nose with vaso...

Vasoconstrictive.

Yeah, vasoconstrictive agents.

And before they transfused in two
units, they did a platelet count.

And?

Stable.

You did well.

I'm here,
you can go now if you want.

Can I stay?

Yeah.

How are you feeling?

Sleepy...

Thank you for being there.

It was a bit of a shock.
For your boy, too.

It was understandable.

He's a hot buttered biscuit,
that one.

Yeah, that's exactly
how I'd describe him.

What would you say?

When he's not with me,
I think I've made him up.

He didn't call or come
after us, or anything?

No.

Maybe I did make him up.

Good God.

What?

There, on the bridge.

That's odd.

You're everywhere, Tessa!

He's done it.

He's put my name in the world.

Juggling clubs!
You brought me juggling clubs!

Happy birthday.

Can you do these?

Yeah. A bit, yeah.

I'll help you
practice later if you want.

Dad, can Adam stay for dinner?

No.

Mum...

I don't live here, do I?

Thank you.

But let him stay.

It's a conspiracy.

All right,
on with the magic show.

Pick a card.

Five of hearts.

No.

One day I'll get the right one,

and you'll all crap yourselves.

Oh, nice. He's allowed
to say that, is he?

It's only "crap. "

Well, that's another
one to cross off the list.

How's the list going?

Things I thought mattered
don't matter so much anymore.

How about you? Got anything
you wanna put up there?

I'm fine.

I mean, there are
things I've kind of,

you know, opted out of I guess.

No, I'm not like you like that.

I don't...

Adam?

Yeah.

You've got to get in the game.

So have a think.

What are your hopes,
your dreams?

Right now?

Yeah.

Let go of my hand.
Let go of my hand.

I'll wipe out.

Yeah, but I'll be miles away.

Go on, all the way across.
Just lean forward and run.

You can do it.

Lean and run, got it.

Get in!
Tessa Scott is in the house!

Cal, how do you stop?

Use the wall.

Cal!
Use the wall!

Hi, babe.

Hey.

You looked good out there.

I kept falling down.
My bum hurts.

You should put some ice on it.

I'm keeping the baby.

Really?

Yeah. Yes.

It's a girl.
I'm having a girl.

And I'm gonna call her Lauren.

That's what I'm gonna do.

I want to be there.

If you don't want me
in the birth,

then I can sit outside
and come in afterwards.

I want to be one
of the first people

in the world to
ever hold your baby.

It's five months away.

Then it's something to aim for.

You see, some people would
find this beautiful.

But all I can think is, it's
killing my poor vegetables.

Hey, what's up, Tess?

It's not enough. Us. This.

How do you mean?

Stay with me. Stay the nights.

What do you want from me, Tess?

Nighttime. Sleeping together.
Waking up together. Breakfast.

What do you really want?

I want you to be
with me in the dark.

To hold me.

To keep loving me.

To help me when I get scared.

To come right to the edge
and see what's there.

What if I get it wrong?

It's impossible to get wrong.

For you.

It's a snow angel.

No. No, no and no.

Dad...
Is this on the list?

A boy staying over?
Forget it. No.

You know, this is
not easy for me to ask.

Well, it's very easy
for me to answer.

I thought you wanted to talk.
Not about this.

I won't permit it.
End of discussion.

Don't pull rank on me.

I have rank. I'm your father.

Not for much longer.

Are you ready?

It's too far.

Just jump.

It's too bloody far.

Good night then.

Wait.

What are you doing?

Psyching myself up.

Oh, is that gonna take a while,

'cause I quite
fancy a cup of tea.

Oh, my God.

Are you all right?
No.

I've broken my arm.

Both arms.

I've broken everything.

Hi.
Hi.

Ow.

But you're here.

He's in there, isn't he?

Yes.

I told you I didn't want that.

I know.

You know why?

I think so.

He's a good kid, Tessa.

But a kid is all he is.
You can't rely on him.

He might let you down.

He won't.

What if he does?

Then I'll still have you.
Like always.

These are insanely good.

I think they fry
the onions in hair oil.

Because we're worth it.

I wish I could do that.

You can't?

No.

I can do like two
and then they just die.

I'll teach you.

I'll put it on my new list.

Along with what?

Too many things.

Spring. Daffodils and tulips.

A long train journey.

A peacock.

Bed and breakfast.

A joint bank account.

Listening to you
snore for years and years.

I don't snore. Do I snore?

You will when you get old.

To go to a parents' evening,
and our child's a genius.

Actually,
all three of our kids.

We're having three?

Chester, Merlin and Daisy.

God help them.

Being with you.
Being with you.

Being with you.

Just being with you.

So, is the love cure
still working its magic?

You tell me.

I should recommend it
to all my patients.

Yes! I got a text.

Cal's got a mobile phone.

He's growing up.

Year Five won!

There was a water
fight in the park

against Year Seven, and we won!

Cal, tell Philippa what
you've been doing recently.

Oh, yeah. I'm doing "keep
death away" spells.

I've put garlic
above all the doors

and at the four
corners of Tessa's bed.

Which is pretty bloody gross,
but I figure...

What?

What is it?

Tessa?

Where's your father?

Telling my mum something.
What's he telling her?

Let's wait for them
to join us, shall we?

It's me that's sick, not them.

How sick, please?

Your latest
blood counts are very low.

Your immune system
is in collapse.

The cancer is now everywhere.

How much longer do I have?

I don't want to be
drawn into time scales.

I won't sue you
if you're wrong.

My best friend's due in April.

Will I get to meet her baby?

No.

Adam?

Is Adam here?

Oh, no, I'm sorry, darling. He
won't be back till this evening.

That's too late.
Where's he gone?

He's on the train.
For the Open Day.

Open Day?
Yeah, at the university.

I was so thrilled
when he said he was

taking up his
place in September.

There were times when I thought

we'd be waiting
another 12 months.

No one wants to be the oldest
kid in the class, do they?

No. No one wants that.

Tessa?

Tessa, are you here?

Darling?

No.

You monster.

Do you want to
leave me with nothing?

Is this it? The list.

It was here all along.

Why didn't you show me?

You should've shown me.

Some of these,
I could've helped you.

I just wanted to help you.

I couldn't help you.

I can't help you.

I don't want you to go.

I don't want you to go.

I can't bear it.

Take me with you.

Oh, please...

I don't want you to go.

I don't want you to go.

Oh, baby...

Oh, you're my baby...

Jesus, Tess,
I've been looking all over.

How long have you been up here?

Why didn't you tell me?

You can't be making
that walk, right?

Just come back with me, please.

Why didn't you tell me?

Because it's gonna be me!

It's gonna be me that's
left behind on my own.

Don't you dare feel
sorry for yourself

because you get to stay behind.

Don't you fucking dare!

This is what you wanted.

Come on, I know it.
This is what you wanted.

For me to go on and...

Oh, please,
you've got to know that

if it wasn't for you,
I wouldn't be able

to go anywhere or do anything.

Except, I don't know,
fucking garden.

It's going to happen.

I know.

Soon.

All right?

So what was it like there?

Big, lots of buildings.
I got a bit lost.

We'll figure it out.

We will?
Yeah.

I'm coming back
as somebody else.

I'll be the wild-haired girl
that walks up to you on day one,

and ask what you're studying.

And I'll fall in love
with you at first sight.

Again.

Tell me how it will be.

You won't want to
eat much from now on.

You'll be thirsty.

And sometimes feverish.

You'll want to sleep a lot.

You'll have
little or no energy.

Will it hurt?

No. The morphine will make
sure you're not in any pain.

It will give you
some beautiful dreams.

Hi, there.

I keep thinking
I've met your baby.

How is she?

Gorgeous.

You'll love her.

Is this happening?

Yeah.

I don't know what's real.

I am.

Do you think I'll be scared?

I think you've had
the worst luck in the world,

and if I was in your shoes,
I would be scared.

But I also believe that however
you handle these last few days

will be exactly as
it should be done.

I hate it when you say days.

Quite soon you'll start to drift
in and out of consciousness.

Sometimes you won't
be able to respond,

but you'll know people are
there, you'll hear them talk.

Thank you for staying with her.

I love her.

And eventually,
Tess, you'll just drift away.

Do you have any
other questions?

No. No.

You're awake.

Just getting an ice lolly.

Why didn't you ring the bell?

Still looking for a cure?

Pain relief.

Can I use
the computer for a sec?

Yeah. Of course.

No, you're good.

Your hair's growing back.

Not quick enough.

What are you showing me here?

A better site for you.

Jobs.

You've got to start thinking.

Not yet.

You're gonna have a life again.

I never had a life.

I was an accountant.

And now you can do anything.

I'm telling Tessa and Dad,

and then everyone else I know.

Because I don't.
Mum fancies Mr. Wilmot.

I do not. I never said that.

You did, you did.

Mum fancies Mr. Wilmot.

All the mums fancy Mr. Wilmot.

And a few of the dads.

Hey. How are you feeling?

Where have you been?

I have been to
a parent-teacher meeting.

You went to that?

She did.
Yeah.

And it bored the hole off me.

Except for Mr. Wilmot?

He said I was doing
great, so Mum got me this.

You spin it round
and it kind of sings.

Yeah,
but not in the house, right?

How come you're up?

Are you sweating?

I'll change your
sheets for you.

I'll do it.

I can make a bed.

You wouldn't know a hospital
corner if it bit you on the arse.

That is not true.

Fine, I'll do it outside.

Come and have a listen, Tess.
It kind of sings.

I'm coming.
Be there in a second.

It's gonna be all right.

Adam!

Yes, beautiful.

Don't let me fall.
I've got you.

I'm falling.

You're not falling.
You're not falling.

Moments...

Our life is
a series of moments.

Each one a journey to the end.

Let them go.

Let them all go.

You should say goodbye, Cal.

No.

Come on, love, it's important.

It might make her die.

Nothing you say can
make her die. Okay?

Hey, we're all here, Tessa.

We all love you so much.

You've done so well.

You can go now. You can go.

Bye, Tess.

Haunt me if you like.
I don't mind.

Our life is
a series of moments.

Let them go.

Moments...

All gathering
to wards this one.

Clinging to me

Like a last breath
you would breathe

You were like home to me

I don't recognize the street

Please don't close your eyes

Don't know
where to look without them

Outside the cars speed by

I never heard them until now

I know you care

I know
it is always been there

But there's trouble ahead,
I can feel it

You are just saving
yourself when you hide it

Yeah, I know you care

I see it in the way you stare

As if there was trouble
ahead and you knew it

I'll be saving myself
from the ruin

And I know you care

I used to run down the stairs

To the door
and I thought you were there

Do you shape
through the comfort of us

Two lovers loved out of love

Oh, but I know you care

I know
it is always been there

But there's trouble ahead,
I can feel it

You are just saving
yourself when you hide it

Yeah, I know you care

I see it in the way you stare

As if there was trouble
ahead and you knew it

I'll be saving myself
from the ruin

And know it wasn't
always wrong

But I've never known
a winter so cold

Now I don't warm my hands
in your coat

But I still hope

'Cause this is how things
ought to have been

And I know the worst of it
wasn't all that it seemed

Why can't I dream

Why can't I dream

'Cause I know you care

And I know you care

I know you care

I know you care

I know it's always
been there