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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,197 --> 00:00:03,645 WOMAN: Mummy's here now. 2 00:00:03,725 --> 00:00:06,632 This will all be over in two shakes of a lamb's tail. 3 00:00:06,660 --> 00:00:08,925 (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC) 4 00:00:09,155 --> 00:00:11,612 Mr K can send as many... (COCKS GUN) 5 00:00:11,631 --> 00:00:13,378 ... dollies as he likes. 6 00:00:13,519 --> 00:00:15,509 I'll fix them all. 7 00:00:15,925 --> 00:00:17,725 (EXHALES HEAVILY) 8 00:00:21,561 --> 00:00:23,212 DJ ON CAR RADIO: Yeah, that was 9 00:00:23,223 --> 00:00:26,797 Signed, Sealed, Delivered by Stevie Wonder. 10 00:00:26,805 --> 00:00:31,805 OK, this next one is going out to Fran and Jamie. 11 00:00:32,278 --> 00:00:34,257 Oh, my God! They're playing my request. 12 00:00:34,639 --> 00:00:36,339 (SIGHS) Go on, turn it up. 13 00:00:36,610 --> 00:00:39,493 The two of them are off to bonnie Scotland 14 00:00:39,547 --> 00:00:41,975 to take someone out. 15 00:00:41,987 --> 00:00:44,737 - Well, whatever you've got planned for them... - What? 16 00:00:44,786 --> 00:00:46,525 ... I'm sure they'll enjoy it. 17 00:00:47,666 --> 00:00:49,188 I love a road trip. 18 00:00:50,702 --> 00:00:54,344 We're just a couple of hot babes cutting loose, 19 00:00:54,531 --> 00:00:56,671 letting the road take us wheresoe'er it will. 20 00:00:56,690 --> 00:00:58,539 We've got to stay sharp today, Jamie. 21 00:00:58,791 --> 00:01:00,637 This target used to work for Mr K 22 00:01:00,663 --> 00:01:02,639 before she went completely insane. 23 00:01:02,761 --> 00:01:05,816 - Oh, my God. Is it Annie Maddox? - Yep. 24 00:01:05,838 --> 00:01:09,290 She wiped out an entire family by drilling holes in their heads. 25 00:01:09,294 --> 00:01:11,172 Not just the family, mate. She wiped out the family, 26 00:01:11,183 --> 00:01:13,018 the pets, the neighbours and some poor guy 27 00:01:13,022 --> 00:01:15,050 parked in a Mr Whippy van outside. 28 00:01:15,775 --> 00:01:18,532 Mr K says we have to deal with her before she goes even more rogue. 29 00:01:19,809 --> 00:01:21,644 (MOBILE PINGS) 30 00:01:24,271 --> 00:01:26,822 I gave you my phone for you to give me directions. What are you doing? 31 00:01:26,955 --> 00:01:28,572 - Nothing. - (MOBILE PINGS) 32 00:01:30,593 --> 00:01:32,477 - Er, Fran? - Mm-hm. 33 00:01:33,389 --> 00:01:34,651 Don't be cross 34 00:01:34,685 --> 00:01:39,403 but I might have signed you up to a... dating app. 35 00:01:39,666 --> 00:01:42,015 - What?! - Joao is out of your life. 36 00:01:42,046 --> 00:01:44,075 You're single. You've got to get back in there. 37 00:01:44,102 --> 00:01:46,256 Apps are the way forward. I'm on one. 38 00:01:46,679 --> 00:01:48,101 I've hooked up with three guys already. 39 00:01:48,125 --> 00:01:50,032 - I thought you were with Colin. - (GROANS) 40 00:01:50,146 --> 00:01:51,428 I gave him the boot. 41 00:01:51,634 --> 00:01:54,542 You're gonna like this. I've made you an amazing profile. 42 00:01:54,626 --> 00:01:57,792 - There's a bunch of people interested. - I bet they're all weirdos. 43 00:01:57,819 --> 00:02:01,094 Somebody did send a picture of a grave with your name on it but 44 00:02:01,152 --> 00:02:04,908 there are a couple of really, really cool people. 45 00:02:04,938 --> 00:02:08,054 Er... you might want to look at this. 46 00:02:08,150 --> 00:02:12,086 She loves climbing and animals! 47 00:02:13,707 --> 00:02:15,645 Er, no, I think you should delete the app. 48 00:02:16,152 --> 00:02:18,730 How are gonna know if she's responded to your message? 49 00:02:19,077 --> 00:02:21,789 - Have you messaged her?! - Well, yeah. I just put "Hey." 50 00:02:24,161 --> 00:02:27,063 And I also sent her a picture of you dressed as the Tin Man at Pride. 51 00:02:27,085 --> 00:02:29,985 Why would you do that? Why would you send that picture?! 52 00:02:30,205 --> 00:02:32,113 (RATTLING) 53 00:02:34,858 --> 00:02:38,740 When you went to the garage, did you fill up with petrol... 54 00:02:39,537 --> 00:02:41,662 - ... or diesel? - Yeah, now, 55 00:02:41,677 --> 00:02:44,312 I couldn't remember what you'd said 56 00:02:44,339 --> 00:02:46,718 so I put in half and half. 57 00:02:48,232 --> 00:02:51,393 - (ENGINE FAILS TO START) - It's not a fucking shandy, Jamie. 58 00:02:51,634 --> 00:02:53,838 Nah, there's nothing. Nothing. 59 00:02:53,991 --> 00:02:56,454 - Should I call the AA? - How are you gonna explain all this? 60 00:02:56,484 --> 00:02:57,613 It's not that bad. 61 00:02:59,165 --> 00:03:00,379 Oh, yeah. 62 00:03:06,064 --> 00:03:08,509 - (SIGHS) - Do you wanna call them or shall I? 63 00:03:12,712 --> 00:03:13,788 Oh, for f... 64 00:03:13,805 --> 00:03:15,500 (TYRES SCREECH) 65 00:03:17,125 --> 00:03:20,096 You just can't get enough of me, can you? 66 00:03:21,430 --> 00:03:23,365 - Hiya, guys! So... - Shut up, Charles! 67 00:03:24,527 --> 00:03:28,844 So, you had to call the competition to bail your asses out again. 68 00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:31,293 We just need a lift to the station so we can get on with our job. 69 00:03:31,320 --> 00:03:32,685 Sure, we could do that. 70 00:03:32,735 --> 00:03:34,756 Or we could drive you all the way there, 71 00:03:34,786 --> 00:03:36,754 split the hit 50-50. 72 00:03:36,838 --> 00:03:38,565 I hear you got Annie Maddox. 73 00:03:38,581 --> 00:03:40,015 She's worth big money. 74 00:03:40,354 --> 00:03:42,749 - No. - Suit yourself. 75 00:03:42,981 --> 00:03:44,565 (ENGINE STARTS) 76 00:03:44,881 --> 00:03:46,334 OK, um... 77 00:03:46,787 --> 00:03:48,175 - 80-20. - Deal. 78 00:03:48,206 --> 00:03:49,941 Ignore him, he's an idiot. 79 00:03:50,395 --> 00:03:52,691 Good luck explaining this to Mr K. 80 00:03:54,327 --> 00:03:56,329 (STAMMERS) OK, 50-50. 81 00:03:58,530 --> 00:03:59,925 40-60? 82 00:04:04,285 --> 00:04:06,764 - Welcome to the fast lane... - (INHALER RATTLES) 83 00:04:07,137 --> 00:04:09,008 - ... bitch. - (INHALES DEEPLY) 84 00:04:12,702 --> 00:04:13,999 A few ground rules. 85 00:04:14,060 --> 00:04:15,200 No chewing gum. 86 00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:17,340 I just had the seats reupholstered. 87 00:04:17,473 --> 00:04:18,610 No crying. 88 00:04:18,980 --> 00:04:21,420 If you need to cry, do it outside the van. 89 00:04:21,569 --> 00:04:25,417 Mostly importantly, nobody touches the tech but me. 90 00:04:25,432 --> 00:04:26,634 It's military grade 91 00:04:26,759 --> 00:04:30,714 and finely-tuned to respond to my voice and my voice alone. 92 00:04:30,744 --> 00:04:33,009 - VAN COMPUTER: Ordering Home Alone. - No! 93 00:04:33,085 --> 00:04:34,569 Obviously not! 94 00:04:34,699 --> 00:04:37,376 (HUFFS) Fucking thing's been acting up. 95 00:04:39,466 --> 00:04:41,942 Give me the target's address, I'll plug it in to the GPS. 96 00:04:41,972 --> 00:04:44,718 But if I gave you the location, 97 00:04:44,844 --> 00:04:47,273 you'd just sling us out and take the job yourself, so 98 00:04:47,342 --> 00:04:49,707 - I will direct you. - Wow. 99 00:04:49,718 --> 00:04:52,403 So this whole super uptight thing isn't just an act. 100 00:04:52,639 --> 00:04:53,989 This should be fun. 101 00:04:54,588 --> 00:04:56,762 Your van is so much cooler than ours. 102 00:04:57,151 --> 00:04:59,901 You've got carpet, phone charger, 103 00:04:59,927 --> 00:05:01,514 - a bean bag back there. - Yeah. 104 00:05:01,685 --> 00:05:03,273 - Gun rack. - Yep. 105 00:05:04,222 --> 00:05:05,839 Is that an espresso machine? 106 00:05:05,850 --> 00:05:09,889 It is indeed. Well spotted. I'm actually not allowed to use that. 107 00:05:10,068 --> 00:05:12,929 Um, Liz said so. Because I get quite gassy. 108 00:05:13,024 --> 00:05:15,233 Yeah. One Vanilio capsule 109 00:05:15,275 --> 00:05:17,651 and my arsehole is in tatters. 110 00:05:18,554 --> 00:05:20,165 (MOBILE PINGS) 111 00:05:22,214 --> 00:05:24,304 - Oh, my God, she messaged you back. - Who? 112 00:05:24,651 --> 00:05:25,952 JAMIE: Nobody. Nobody. 113 00:05:25,971 --> 00:05:29,526 Fran's visa marriage just collapsed so she signed up to a dating app 114 00:05:29,537 --> 00:05:32,321 and a really cute woman's messaging her. 115 00:05:32,595 --> 00:05:34,948 This should be fun. What did she say? 116 00:05:35,055 --> 00:05:37,191 Well, that's none of your business. 117 00:05:37,340 --> 00:05:38,801 OK, new ground rule. 118 00:05:38,926 --> 00:05:40,578 Everyone has to read out their messages. 119 00:05:40,673 --> 00:05:44,036 - Your application for an overdraft has been den... - Not you, Charles! 120 00:05:44,296 --> 00:05:47,351 We're not messaging, we're emoji-ing. Gotta get with the kids. 121 00:05:47,373 --> 00:05:49,334 And she's sent me a thumbs-up 122 00:05:49,369 --> 00:05:51,867 which is massive in my community. 123 00:05:51,897 --> 00:05:54,441 - What a dick. - You are so in there. 124 00:05:54,468 --> 00:05:56,263 - Do you think? - Definitely. 125 00:05:56,321 --> 00:05:58,799 - (MOBILE PINGS) - "What are you up to this weekend? 126 00:05:58,810 --> 00:06:01,400 My flatmate is away so I'm home alone." 127 00:06:01,423 --> 00:06:04,961 - COMPUTER: Ordering Home Alone. - Jesus Christ! Not again! 128 00:06:04,984 --> 00:06:06,644 Grrrr! (HUFFS CROSSLY) 129 00:06:06,651 --> 00:06:08,444 OK, guys, can I just say something? 130 00:06:08,451 --> 00:06:10,664 I know Liz well and she's getting really worked up. 131 00:06:10,675 --> 00:06:13,574 So can everyone please not even say anything 132 00:06:13,585 --> 00:06:15,984 that remotely sounds a bit like Home Alone? 133 00:06:16,011 --> 00:06:18,513 - COMPUTER: Ordering Home Alone. - What the fuck?! 134 00:06:19,638 --> 00:06:22,575 - Can we pull over? I think I might need another cry. - Fuck my life. 135 00:06:27,182 --> 00:06:30,366 I heard Annie Maddox is holed up in an old school or something. 136 00:06:31,325 --> 00:06:32,418 Maybe. 137 00:06:33,318 --> 00:06:35,045 Guess she really lost it, huh? 138 00:06:37,365 --> 00:06:39,279 (SCOFFS AND CHUCKLES) 139 00:06:39,630 --> 00:06:42,033 Can you at least tell me how much further till I turn off? 140 00:06:42,048 --> 00:06:45,598 No way. Just stay on the road until I tell you to come off. 141 00:06:45,934 --> 00:06:48,210 - (COUGHS) Uptight. - (CHARLES CHATTERS SOFTLY) 142 00:06:49,983 --> 00:06:53,015 So, this is your area of the van, I'm guessing. 143 00:06:53,034 --> 00:06:56,558 - Yeah, this is my man cave, if you will. - (BOTH CHUCKLE) 144 00:06:57,019 --> 00:07:00,081 No, it's lovely. Liz even let me put up some pictures that I've done. 145 00:07:00,234 --> 00:07:02,618 Oh, yeah. Now, who are those people? 146 00:07:02,763 --> 00:07:04,845 These guys are famous impressionists... 147 00:07:04,864 --> 00:07:06,694 - Oh, yeah? - ... and heroes of mine. 148 00:07:06,709 --> 00:07:10,787 I used to be quite involved in the whole impression game myself. 149 00:07:10,799 --> 00:07:12,820 - Ah. Wow. - I used to be pretty handy. 150 00:07:12,846 --> 00:07:16,443 Yeah. We used to have a monthly comedy night back in Helmand 151 00:07:16,466 --> 00:07:18,156 when I was there as an army nurse. 152 00:07:18,198 --> 00:07:21,397 Um, we used to call it Laugh-ganistan. 153 00:07:22,130 --> 00:07:23,686 (CHUCKLES) 154 00:07:23,885 --> 00:07:25,806 - Laugh... Afghanistan. - Oh! 155 00:07:25,829 --> 00:07:29,556 - (CHUCKLES) Play on words. Bit of a play on words. - That's good. 156 00:07:29,637 --> 00:07:33,027 - (LAUGHS) - No, I seriously considered going pro, actually, 157 00:07:33,054 --> 00:07:36,165 until Liz reminded me, "Look, you haven't got the talent, 158 00:07:36,245 --> 00:07:37,973 - the ability... " - The charisma. 159 00:07:37,981 --> 00:07:40,471 The charisma. She kind of made me realise that 160 00:07:40,505 --> 00:07:42,431 your dreams are a waste of time. 161 00:07:42,705 --> 00:07:44,425 - Great. - Yeah. 162 00:07:45,402 --> 00:07:46,402 What's up? 163 00:07:47,163 --> 00:07:51,050 Well, we were emoji-ing and it was all going really well 164 00:07:51,065 --> 00:07:53,896 - and then suddenly she just left the chat. - Ouch. 165 00:07:54,231 --> 00:07:56,131 - What did you send her? - I mean, 166 00:07:56,199 --> 00:07:58,400 just the usual, to be honest. Er, I did, 167 00:07:58,423 --> 00:08:01,652 - fox, horse, fox, fox, fox, horse, unicorn. - (SCOFFS) 168 00:08:02,232 --> 00:08:04,185 - You sent a unicorn? - Yeah. 169 00:08:04,265 --> 00:08:06,088 - Do you know what that means? - Wh... 170 00:08:06,405 --> 00:08:08,405 (JAMIE AND CHARLES CHATTER) 171 00:08:09,252 --> 00:08:11,155 - Charles... come on. - Jamie, I... 172 00:08:11,158 --> 00:08:12,600 - I'm rusty. - Just one. Go on. 173 00:08:12,623 --> 00:08:15,983 - No, I'm shy. I'm shy. Shy boy. - (SIGHS) (TUTS) 174 00:08:16,486 --> 00:08:18,546 OK, right, I'll do one. 175 00:08:18,561 --> 00:08:19,930 - OK. (LAUGHS) - Um... 176 00:08:20,373 --> 00:08:21,585 OK. 177 00:08:23,611 --> 00:08:25,701 (SILLY VOICE) I'm ET. 178 00:08:27,512 --> 00:08:29,617 - Is it ET? - Yes. 179 00:08:29,945 --> 00:08:33,839 Yeah, good. I don't think ET ever says, "I'm ET." 180 00:08:34,309 --> 00:08:36,029 It was more kind of um... 181 00:08:36,257 --> 00:08:41,052 (AS ET) I'll be right here. 182 00:08:41,075 --> 00:08:43,367 Oh, Charles, that is brilliant. 183 00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:45,770 - Thank you. - Is that one of your... 184 00:08:46,117 --> 00:08:48,218 - Yeah? - One of those classics, yeah. 185 00:08:48,279 --> 00:08:51,125 - I'm famous for that one. - I'd love to be able to do that. 186 00:08:52,059 --> 00:08:57,059 (AS ET) ET phone home. 187 00:08:57,605 --> 00:09:00,868 - COMPUTER: Ordering Home Alone. - The fuck, Charles! 188 00:09:01,165 --> 00:09:02,230 Sorry. 189 00:09:02,642 --> 00:09:04,980 - (SOFTLY) You got me in trouble. - Not my fault. 190 00:09:05,125 --> 00:09:07,125 (TYRES SCREECH) 191 00:09:07,516 --> 00:09:08,896 We'll stay here tonight. 192 00:09:08,904 --> 00:09:11,330 We need to be fresh if we're gonna take Annie down. 193 00:09:11,365 --> 00:09:14,598 Charles, let's check and see if they have any rooms. 194 00:09:14,629 --> 00:09:15,629 OK, cool. 195 00:09:16,150 --> 00:09:17,176 Now or... ? 196 00:09:17,195 --> 00:09:18,808 - Andale! - Yes, mamacita. 197 00:09:24,441 --> 00:09:26,427 - How's it going up here? - Well, 198 00:09:26,488 --> 00:09:30,103 my dating technique could best be described as... chilling. 199 00:09:30,115 --> 00:09:33,723 No, I meant with Liz. I saw you guys chatting away. 200 00:09:33,742 --> 00:09:36,381 - What? - There's more than a whiff of chemistry. 201 00:09:36,453 --> 00:09:39,340 I have not seen one single sign that she is into it. 202 00:09:39,371 --> 00:09:40,725 I got us a room. 203 00:09:40,954 --> 00:09:42,094 What?! 204 00:09:43,829 --> 00:09:45,282 The four of us. 205 00:09:46,067 --> 00:09:47,805 Yeah, I mean, obviously er... 206 00:09:48,365 --> 00:09:49,492 all of us. 207 00:09:51,285 --> 00:09:52,925 They only had one left, so... 208 00:09:53,050 --> 00:09:54,873 Well, that makes sense. Yeah. 209 00:09:57,528 --> 00:09:58,695 Get your stuff. 210 00:09:58,996 --> 00:10:01,533 Yeah, I'll see... (CLEARS THROAT) ... see you in there. 211 00:10:09,966 --> 00:10:13,559 You look like you're gonna be comfy down there tonight, Charles. 212 00:10:13,881 --> 00:10:15,399 That's good, actually. 213 00:10:15,704 --> 00:10:16,786 (GRUNTS) 214 00:10:17,125 --> 00:10:19,008 - It's nice in here, isn't it? - Yeah. 215 00:10:19,025 --> 00:10:20,923 - Yeah. - Not sleeping in the bed? 216 00:10:20,934 --> 00:10:23,481 Basically, me and Liz have this arrangement 217 00:10:23,493 --> 00:10:26,460 where I let her sleep in the bed and she lets me sleep on the floor. 218 00:10:26,491 --> 00:10:29,233 - And you're welcome. - Thank you, I appreciate it. 219 00:10:29,414 --> 00:10:30,432 It's lovely. 220 00:10:30,440 --> 00:10:33,071 - Nice jimjams, Charles. - Oh, thank you very much. Yeah, paisley. 221 00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:38,725 - You wanna take a picture, Fran? - Yeah, er, actually, I was 222 00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:43,060 taking er... in the tea- and coffe-making facilities. Yep. 223 00:10:43,644 --> 00:10:45,371 (KNOCK AT DOOR) 224 00:10:45,398 --> 00:10:46,925 It's just one of our weapons guys. 225 00:10:47,267 --> 00:10:48,792 We're running low on ammo. 226 00:10:50,185 --> 00:10:51,786 I'm so sorry I'm late. 227 00:10:52,491 --> 00:10:54,165 I drove as fast as I could. 228 00:10:54,433 --> 00:10:57,499 I've got Ofsted in tomorrow. Day job's an absolute mare. 229 00:11:00,683 --> 00:11:02,005 (HEAVY THUD) 230 00:11:07,410 --> 00:11:08,905 Forgot I had that in there. 231 00:11:09,465 --> 00:11:10,774 That were lucky. 232 00:11:11,965 --> 00:11:14,096 Naughty little grenade. Huh! 233 00:11:14,832 --> 00:11:17,826 Right, just the two boxes of the 9-mils then, is it? 234 00:11:17,837 --> 00:11:19,276 Thank you. 235 00:11:19,710 --> 00:11:20,808 Goodbye. 236 00:11:20,938 --> 00:11:23,656 Right, while I've got you, can I interest you in anything else? 237 00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:25,922 I've got a silencer. 238 00:11:26,205 --> 00:11:28,858 Er, I've got... an Uzi. 239 00:11:29,354 --> 00:11:30,565 I've got a mini Uzi. 240 00:11:30,850 --> 00:11:32,272 I've got um... 241 00:11:33,317 --> 00:11:35,079 Michelle Gordon's homework. 242 00:11:36,456 --> 00:11:37,524 Fuck. 243 00:11:38,005 --> 00:11:39,892 And the pièce de resistance: 244 00:11:39,900 --> 00:11:42,874 - some weed brownies. - Oh, dealing drugs now as well, are you? 245 00:11:42,893 --> 00:11:45,672 You try keeping up with child support on a teacher's salary. 246 00:11:45,700 --> 00:11:47,751 - I love brownies. - Might be nice. 247 00:11:47,927 --> 00:11:49,796 Help you chill the fuck out, Fran. 248 00:11:49,815 --> 00:11:51,526 Er, I am actually super chilled. 249 00:11:51,545 --> 00:11:54,429 You spent most of the day harassing a climbing instructor. 250 00:11:57,847 --> 00:11:59,415 (WHISPERING) Did I harass the instructor? 251 00:11:59,487 --> 00:12:00,898 (WHISPERING) You were a bit persistent. 252 00:12:01,012 --> 00:12:04,168 Really sorry, but could you just get off my bed? I'm gonna sleep there. 253 00:12:04,216 --> 00:12:06,786 If that's all right, sorry. Thanks. 254 00:12:09,846 --> 00:12:11,801 There was Alison and Stella and they both left me. 255 00:12:11,825 --> 00:12:13,327 There was the florist who went off 256 00:12:13,398 --> 00:12:15,663 with the sperm that I had paid for. 257 00:12:15,696 --> 00:12:18,885 Joao is a nice Brazilian barista. I tried to take care of him. 258 00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:21,498 He moved in, claimed squatters' rights and evicted me. 259 00:12:21,517 --> 00:12:24,201 And now my credit card statement looks like RuPaul's wedding list. 260 00:12:24,205 --> 00:12:26,707 Can anyone else see that magical wizard? 261 00:12:29,005 --> 00:12:30,531 It's a good bake. 262 00:12:30,922 --> 00:12:32,357 I feel nothing. 263 00:12:32,590 --> 00:12:35,331 My love-life's been pretty dormant since... 264 00:12:35,579 --> 00:12:37,043 since Aggie died. 265 00:12:37,138 --> 00:12:39,060 Oh, your partner's died? I'm so sorry. 266 00:12:39,088 --> 00:12:42,901 Yeah. (SIGHS) Right before her 90th birthday as well. 267 00:12:43,907 --> 00:12:46,061 - She were 90? - Yeah. 268 00:12:46,147 --> 00:12:47,839 I like a mature woman. 269 00:12:48,357 --> 00:12:49,965 Great memories with her though. 270 00:12:50,097 --> 00:12:51,880 I used to wheel her out into the sun 271 00:12:51,899 --> 00:12:53,878 and sometimes her eyes would open... 272 00:12:56,565 --> 00:12:59,565 - And? - No, that's it. Her eyes would open. 273 00:13:06,485 --> 00:13:08,688 (SNORING) 274 00:13:09,725 --> 00:13:11,725 (SNORING AND GRUNTING) 275 00:13:13,961 --> 00:13:15,620 Well, he's out cold. 276 00:13:18,410 --> 00:13:21,113 Hey, for what it's worth, 277 00:13:22,285 --> 00:13:24,285 I'm sorry about your divorce. 278 00:13:24,722 --> 00:13:26,204 That sucks. 279 00:13:26,657 --> 00:13:29,184 Yeah. It was just nice having somebody at the end of the phone, 280 00:13:29,203 --> 00:13:31,067 really, I think. 281 00:13:31,129 --> 00:13:34,128 Although, to be honest, Joao never answered my calls so... 282 00:13:36,293 --> 00:13:38,315 This job is pretty lonely. 283 00:13:39,044 --> 00:13:40,402 Honestly? 284 00:13:41,561 --> 00:13:44,197 Sometimes I feel like I'm just... 285 00:13:44,485 --> 00:13:46,995 one bad day away 286 00:13:47,110 --> 00:13:49,585 from doing something really crazy, like... 287 00:13:50,047 --> 00:13:51,763 blowing up a zoo. 288 00:13:52,365 --> 00:13:54,318 Or becoming a Christian. 289 00:13:54,909 --> 00:13:56,645 (MAN SNORES SOFTLY) 290 00:14:01,410 --> 00:14:02,874 Um... 291 00:14:03,446 --> 00:14:06,325 will you go for a drink with me? 292 00:14:09,645 --> 00:14:10,854 Sure? 293 00:14:11,636 --> 00:14:13,353 - Why not? - (MAN SNORES) 294 00:14:13,467 --> 00:14:15,202 - Really? - No! (LAUGHS) 295 00:14:15,212 --> 00:14:17,896 - Oh, fuck's sake. - Serious?! (SNORTS) 296 00:14:19,205 --> 00:14:21,433 Fran! I'm fucking with you. 297 00:14:21,529 --> 00:14:23,163 Of course I'll get that drink with you. 298 00:14:23,178 --> 00:14:27,245 Why do you have to be such a monumental dick... all the time? 299 00:14:27,268 --> 00:14:28,746 That's just my way. 300 00:14:29,645 --> 00:14:31,565 Let me give you my personal number. 301 00:14:32,169 --> 00:14:34,339 Oh, er... here. 302 00:14:36,485 --> 00:14:38,365 (MAN SNORES) 303 00:14:43,387 --> 00:14:46,757 Let me drop you a line sometime. 304 00:14:47,415 --> 00:14:49,325 (SNORING CONTINUES) 305 00:14:53,525 --> 00:14:55,805 - (GRUNTS SLEEPILY) - Oh, er, fuck. 306 00:14:55,839 --> 00:14:57,316 - Right. I've gotta go. - Big day tomorrow! 307 00:14:57,321 --> 00:14:58,685 - Yeah. - (CLEARS THROAT) 308 00:14:58,725 --> 00:15:00,845 (BIRDSONG) 309 00:15:00,925 --> 00:15:02,885 (MOBILE BUZZES) 310 00:15:08,085 --> 00:15:09,626 (GROANS) 311 00:15:13,485 --> 00:15:14,942 (WHISPERING): Jamie. 312 00:15:16,245 --> 00:15:19,028 Mr K. Hi. 313 00:15:19,495 --> 00:15:23,285 Yeah, no, we are... we are just approaching the target right now. 314 00:15:27,285 --> 00:15:29,296 (SOFTLY) Jamie. Jamie! 315 00:15:29,344 --> 00:15:30,828 Liz and Charles have gone! 316 00:15:30,851 --> 00:15:33,230 - (GRUNTS) What? - Mr K, hi, er... Uh, i... u... 317 00:15:33,245 --> 00:15:36,245 I'm so sorry. I just... (IMITATES DISTORTED SPEECH) 318 00:15:36,325 --> 00:15:37,965 ... eaking up. 319 00:15:38,045 --> 00:15:40,085 They are nicking our job. They're nicking our job. 320 00:15:40,195 --> 00:15:42,312 (MUMBLES) Liz and Charles 321 00:15:42,365 --> 00:15:44,805 don't actually know the address so it doesn't... 322 00:15:45,420 --> 00:15:47,832 This is my fault. She asked for my phone 323 00:15:47,841 --> 00:15:49,772 and I gave it to her because I thought she meant it. 324 00:15:49,796 --> 00:15:52,856 She said she was putting her personal number in it and she lied. 325 00:15:52,875 --> 00:15:56,207 - She was getting the location. - Liz gave you her personal number. 326 00:15:56,245 --> 00:15:59,620 - Nice one, Fran. - Yeah, um... now's not the time, Jamie. 327 00:16:00,144 --> 00:16:01,556 What time is it? 328 00:16:03,205 --> 00:16:05,325 - Mate, I need to borrow your car. I... - What?! 329 00:16:05,508 --> 00:16:07,825 I've got Ofsted. You're not having the car. 330 00:16:07,853 --> 00:16:11,429 - It is gonna happen and Ofsted's pointless. - Not a chance. No way am... 331 00:16:13,822 --> 00:16:15,257 Nice one, Fran. 332 00:16:15,338 --> 00:16:17,583 Again, I will leave you hanging. We don't have time. 333 00:16:24,885 --> 00:16:27,694 Blimey. Is this where she's holed up? 334 00:16:29,765 --> 00:16:31,340 Something's not right. 335 00:16:33,245 --> 00:16:35,245 Probably best sleep that off, mate. 336 00:16:36,913 --> 00:16:38,601 Someone's trashed their van. 337 00:16:39,321 --> 00:16:41,872 - Try phoning them. - I don't have any reception. 338 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:49,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 339 00:16:55,365 --> 00:16:57,365 (SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC) 340 00:17:02,285 --> 00:17:04,805 (SINISTER MUSIC) 341 00:17:05,445 --> 00:17:07,125 (EERIE LAUGHTER) 342 00:17:09,665 --> 00:17:11,224 - (DISTANT SHRIEKING) - What's that? 343 00:17:14,685 --> 00:17:17,016 Ssh. Keep it down. 344 00:17:17,045 --> 00:17:18,725 (CLATTERING) 345 00:17:37,981 --> 00:17:42,124 Wow. Those weed brownies have hit Liz and Charles pretty hard. 346 00:17:42,167 --> 00:17:45,204 (WHISPERING) I don't think this dolly tea party was their idea. 347 00:17:45,228 --> 00:17:46,596 (WHISPERING) Annie's off her rocker. 348 00:17:47,045 --> 00:17:49,269 - Just keep your eyes peeled. - (MOUTHS) 349 00:17:50,045 --> 00:17:51,725 Coo-ee! 350 00:18:02,884 --> 00:18:05,282 Here you go, poppet. It's boiling. 351 00:18:05,311 --> 00:18:07,065 - Drink up. - It's boiling. It's boiling! 352 00:18:07,085 --> 00:18:09,854 Don't be silly. Watch Mummy. 353 00:18:13,558 --> 00:18:15,794 (SLURPS AND GULPS) 354 00:18:20,405 --> 00:18:22,405 (GULPS) 355 00:18:23,208 --> 00:18:24,752 Ahhh! 356 00:18:25,365 --> 00:18:27,005 Now then, who's for more cake? 357 00:18:28,452 --> 00:18:30,983 - I said who's for more cake! - Oh, yeah. Love some. 358 00:18:31,002 --> 00:18:32,725 - 100%. - Maybe lemon drizzle. 359 00:18:33,634 --> 00:18:36,251 I hate to be difficult but have you got a gluten-free option? 360 00:18:36,261 --> 00:18:37,845 - My stomach is... - (THUD) 361 00:18:42,844 --> 00:18:44,670 Awesome job rescuing us (!) 362 00:18:44,818 --> 00:18:46,445 Don't know what we'd do without you. 363 00:18:46,483 --> 00:18:47,660 If you hadn't double crossed us 364 00:18:47,679 --> 00:18:49,806 - we wouldn't be in this mess. - Ssh. 365 00:18:53,533 --> 00:18:56,413 You pretended to like me just so you could get the hit. 366 00:18:56,451 --> 00:18:58,296 Don't cry, you'll ruin your make-up. 367 00:18:58,305 --> 00:19:00,308 I think I've shat myself. It's the gluten. 368 00:19:00,336 --> 00:19:02,334 - I said shut up! - (PLATE SHATTERS) 369 00:19:02,639 --> 00:19:06,662 This always happens. Dollies never do what Mummy says. 370 00:19:11,915 --> 00:19:14,509 I'll just have to fix you all, won't I? 371 00:19:15,285 --> 00:19:17,245 (ELECTRICAL WHIRRING) 372 00:19:17,325 --> 00:19:19,205 (ALL SCREAM) 373 00:19:20,405 --> 00:19:22,012 Please, I beg you! 374 00:19:22,284 --> 00:19:24,148 - Please, please! - (MAN CLEARS THROAT) 375 00:19:25,565 --> 00:19:27,422 I'm so sorry to disturb you. 376 00:19:27,437 --> 00:19:30,025 If I could just grab my car keys then I'll be on my way. 377 00:19:35,205 --> 00:19:38,025 (ALL SCREAM) No, no, no! Please don't do it! 378 00:19:38,045 --> 00:19:40,519 - (EVIL GIGGLE) - Don't do it, please! (ALL SCREAM) 379 00:19:40,805 --> 00:19:42,636 - (DRILL STOPS) - Oh! 380 00:19:42,950 --> 00:19:45,663 Oh, dear. Battery must have died. 381 00:19:45,715 --> 00:19:46,936 Back in a tick. 382 00:19:46,983 --> 00:19:49,315 (ALL SIGH WITH RELIEF) 383 00:19:50,725 --> 00:19:52,685 Well, that's my career up in smoke. 384 00:19:53,023 --> 00:19:55,712 - Visitation rights as well. Thanks a lot. - Ooh! 385 00:19:55,765 --> 00:19:57,204 Found it. 386 00:19:57,529 --> 00:19:59,405 (CHUCKLES) 387 00:19:59,560 --> 00:20:02,315 For fuck's sake. One of us must have something we can use. 388 00:20:02,339 --> 00:20:05,147 Did I know I was coming to Satan's tea party? No. 389 00:20:06,405 --> 00:20:09,461 Oh, the grenade. It's still in my pocket from last night. 390 00:20:09,518 --> 00:20:10,868 Get it. 391 00:20:10,910 --> 00:20:12,903 I'm tied up. 392 00:20:19,597 --> 00:20:23,191 Will someone else pull the pin? My hand's tied to the fucking chair. 393 00:20:23,253 --> 00:20:26,123 - Fran's hard. She can pull it. - Grab it under your chin 394 00:20:26,142 --> 00:20:28,002 and pass it down the line as quick as you can. 395 00:20:28,025 --> 00:20:30,533 Like pass the orange. I love pass the orange. 396 00:20:39,845 --> 00:20:41,125 Oh. 397 00:20:50,125 --> 00:20:51,399 Fran. 398 00:20:51,642 --> 00:20:52,891 Yeah? 399 00:20:52,905 --> 00:20:54,569 You can use your hands. 400 00:20:55,813 --> 00:20:57,501 I did know that. 401 00:20:59,645 --> 00:21:01,343 (PIN CLICKS SOFTLY) 402 00:21:03,685 --> 00:21:06,340 - (GRENADE CLATTERS) - Oh, shit. Where's it gone? 403 00:21:06,365 --> 00:21:08,457 (ALL MUTTER SOFTLY) Over here. 404 00:21:10,226 --> 00:21:12,295 I've got it. I've got it. 405 00:21:14,005 --> 00:21:15,618 Now! 406 00:21:16,205 --> 00:21:18,845 (ALL YELL) 407 00:21:22,246 --> 00:21:23,590 (SILENCE) 408 00:21:23,728 --> 00:21:25,950 - Ar... - (EXPLOSION) 409 00:21:32,375 --> 00:21:33,934 (GRUNTS WITH EFFORT) 410 00:21:34,110 --> 00:21:36,151 OK, that's Mummy all bagged up. 411 00:21:36,405 --> 00:21:39,049 Shame really. If she wasn't a sociopath, 412 00:21:39,068 --> 00:21:41,525 she would actually be really lovely, you know? 413 00:21:41,818 --> 00:21:43,620 Look, Charles and I, 414 00:21:43,645 --> 00:21:46,325 we appreciate you guys helping us out. 415 00:21:46,709 --> 00:21:49,475 - We know you didn't have to do that. - Yeah, well, listen, I... 416 00:21:49,884 --> 00:21:52,097 I know you'd have done the same for us, so... 417 00:21:52,154 --> 00:21:53,709 100%. You know what? 418 00:21:53,733 --> 00:21:56,893 Come on, bring it in, guys. No? OK, no worries. 419 00:21:58,642 --> 00:22:02,437 - We should probably pack this lot up. - Hey, you've done enough. 420 00:22:02,885 --> 00:22:04,753 We'll pack. You drive. 421 00:22:04,805 --> 00:22:06,498 - Andale! - Yep. 422 00:22:07,685 --> 00:22:09,685 Thanks again, guys. Keep in touch. 423 00:22:13,765 --> 00:22:16,380 - I mean, I know we complain a lot about them... - Hm. 424 00:22:16,423 --> 00:22:18,482 ... but they're actually all right. 425 00:22:18,764 --> 00:22:21,209 You had it right all along and I didn't believe you. 426 00:22:21,233 --> 00:22:23,145 But actually they're decent. 427 00:22:23,365 --> 00:22:25,391 - Do you think they could be... - (ENGINE STARTS) 428 00:22:25,462 --> 00:22:28,120 Unbe-fucking-lievable. 429 00:22:29,290 --> 00:22:33,012 I'll let Mr K know Charles and I got the job done. 430 00:22:33,045 --> 00:22:35,786 - (ENGINE REVS) - Nothing personal, just business. 431 00:22:35,805 --> 00:22:39,219 - Let me know about that drink, Fran! - (ENGINE REVS) 432 00:22:42,185 --> 00:22:43,872 Sure, yeah. 433 00:22:45,174 --> 00:22:47,643 Kids, jobs, car. 434 00:22:47,701 --> 00:22:49,545 Would you like my clothes as well? 435 00:22:51,109 --> 00:22:53,170 Yep. If it gets cold on the walk 436 00:22:53,193 --> 00:22:54,536 I might just take them. 437 00:22:55,550 --> 00:22:56,668 Phone an Uber. 438 00:22:56,695 --> 00:22:58,696 - There's no reception. - Oh, there's no reception. 439 00:22:59,631 --> 00:23:02,445 I'm starving. Can we at least order a pizza or something? 440 00:23:02,460 --> 00:23:05,088 - Again, no reception. - Not even a small one? 441 00:23:05,195 --> 00:23:07,243 The size of the pizza is not the issue. 442 00:23:07,446 --> 00:23:12,278 - Synced and corrected by chamallow - - www.addic7ed.com - 443 00:23:12,316 --> 00:23:15,958 - Do we really need another person? - It's a big job today. 444 00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:17,896 And Nikhil is supposed to be the best. 445 00:23:21,120 --> 00:23:23,740 Mr K tell me choose new partner. 446 00:23:23,893 --> 00:23:25,125 I choose you. 447 00:23:31,087 --> 00:23:35,503 Final warning. I am big, scary man with mullet and muscles... 448 00:23:36,003 --> 00:23:38,930 - Hey! - Please! I have a really delicate trachea! 449 00:23:45,198 --> 00:23:46,533 Mr. K. 450 00:23:50,843 --> 00:23:52,626 I'm really sorry, Jamie. 450 00:23:53,305 --> 00:23:59,922 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 34066

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