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(Woman) 'If someone had asked me,
when I reached my 50s, to assess my life,
2
00:00:35,328 --> 00:00:38,540
'I'd have said I'd achieved
a decent measure of fulfilment,
3
00:00:38,665 --> 00:00:41,000
'both personally and professionally.
4
00:00:41,125 --> 00:00:44,212
'Beyond that, I would say,
"I don't choose to delve."
5
00:00:44,337 --> 00:00:48,383
'Not that I was afraid of uncovering
some dark side of my character.
6
00:00:48,508 --> 00:00:53,471
'But I always feel, if something seems
to be working, leave it alone.
7
00:00:53,596 --> 00:00:55,765
'My name is Marion Post.
8
00:00:55,890 --> 00:00:58,393
'I'm Director of Undergraduate Studies
in Philosophy
9
00:00:58,518 --> 00:01:00,395
'at a very fine women's college,
10
00:01:00,520 --> 00:01:05,024
'although right now I'm on leave
of absence to begin writing a book.
11
00:01:05,149 --> 00:01:08,695
'My husband is a very accomplished
physician, a cardiologist,
12
00:01:08,820 --> 00:01:11,614
'who some years ago
examined my heart,
13
00:01:11,739 --> 00:01:13,783
'liked what he saw
and proposed.
14
00:01:13,908 --> 00:01:16,077
'It's the second marriage
for both of us,
15
00:01:16,202 --> 00:01:18,246
'and he brought to it
a 16-year-old daughter
16
00:01:18,371 --> 00:01:21,666
'who lives with his former wife
but visits us frequently.
17
00:01:21,791 --> 00:01:25,169
'She's a sweet girl who can be
a little undisciplined at times,
18
00:01:25,295 --> 00:01:28,756
'and I've tried to take her
under my wing as best I can.
19
00:01:29,382 --> 00:01:31,801
'I also have a married brother.
20
00:01:31,926 --> 00:01:36,055
'My mother died recently,
but my dad's still alive and healthy.
21
00:01:37,724 --> 00:01:41,227
'Not much else to say,
except normally I write at home,
22
00:01:41,352 --> 00:01:44,314
'but construction noise next door
has become so terrible,
23
00:01:44,439 --> 00:01:48,026
'I subleased a one-room flat
downtown as an office.
24
00:01:48,818 --> 00:01:52,322
'A new book is always
a very demanding project,
25
00:01:52,447 --> 00:01:55,325
'and it requires that
I really shut myself off
26
00:01:55,450 --> 00:01:58,202
'from everything but the work.'
27
00:01:58,953 --> 00:02:03,374
(♪ ERIK SATIE: "Gymnopédie No. 1")
28
00:03:04,435 --> 00:03:09,649
'As I settled down to work that first
morning, a strange thing occurred.
29
00:03:13,027 --> 00:03:18,199
(Man) Something about him
just got to a deeper thing in me.
30
00:03:19,075 --> 00:03:24,163
So this was my... my big experience
with another man. My first one.
31
00:03:25,707 --> 00:03:30,670
And I've never been able to get it out
of my mind. I still have fantasies about it,
32
00:03:31,337 --> 00:03:33,840
which are sort of bugging me.
33
00:03:35,883 --> 00:03:38,970
(Psychiatrist)
What do you mean, "fantasies"?
34
00:03:39,095 --> 00:03:43,516
(Man) Well, sometimes when
I'm masturbating, or when I'm just...
35
00:03:45,268 --> 00:03:48,688
Well, sometimes when I'm...
when I'm working,
36
00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:53,901
I find myself thinking about Giles.
37
00:03:54,527 --> 00:03:58,239
And, uh, it's not that I'm not
attracted to my wife any more.
38
00:03:58,364 --> 00:04:04,245
I mean, I still am. I really am physically
moved by her, and other women, but...
39
00:04:04,370 --> 00:04:07,749
(Marion) 'While eavesdropping
on the intimate revelations
40
00:04:07,874 --> 00:04:11,085
'of a psychiatrist's office might be
fascinating to some people,
41
00:04:11,210 --> 00:04:15,089
'it was not exactly what I had in mind
when I rented the place.'
42
00:04:15,214 --> 00:04:17,925
(Man) Well, um...
43
00:04:19,886 --> 00:04:23,723
I don't really have to use him
like a piece of pornography...
44
00:04:31,898 --> 00:04:35,610
(Marion) 'I worked hard all day,
and the work came very slowly.
45
00:04:35,735 --> 00:04:38,988
'Beginning a book is always
the most difficult part for me,
46
00:04:39,113 --> 00:04:42,241
'and by late afternoon
I'd become tired.
47
00:04:42,366 --> 00:04:47,538
'I lay my head down and closed my eyes,
and I guess I dozed off.
48
00:04:47,663 --> 00:04:50,708
'I don't know exactly
how long I was asleep,
49
00:04:50,833 --> 00:04:53,795
'but one of the pillows must have
slipped down off the vent,
50
00:04:53,920 --> 00:04:57,507
'because I gradually became
aware again of a voice.
51
00:04:57,632 --> 00:05:03,304
'It was a woman's voice, and it was such
an anguished, heart-wrenching sound
52
00:05:03,429 --> 00:05:06,724
'that I was totally arrested
by its sadness.'
53
00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:12,563
(Woman) I just know that I woke up
during the middle of the night.
54
00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:18,361
And time passed,
and there were strange shadows.
55
00:05:20,655 --> 00:05:23,991
I began having troubling thoughts
about my life.
56
00:05:25,660 --> 00:05:28,996
Like there was something
about it not real.
57
00:05:30,957 --> 00:05:33,459
Full of deceptions.
58
00:05:33,584 --> 00:05:36,128
That these... these deceptions
59
00:05:36,254 --> 00:05:39,507
had become so... so many,
60
00:05:39,632 --> 00:05:42,510
and so much a part of me now,
61
00:05:42,635 --> 00:05:46,138
that I couldn't even tell
who I really was.
62
00:05:47,890 --> 00:05:50,768
And suddenly I began to perspire.
63
00:05:51,978 --> 00:05:56,065
I sat up in bed
with my heart just pounding.
64
00:05:56,899 --> 00:05:59,986
And I looked at my husband next to me,
65
00:06:00,653 --> 00:06:04,407
and it was as if he...
he was a stranger.
66
00:06:05,992 --> 00:06:09,120
And I turned on the light
and I woke him up,
67
00:06:09,245 --> 00:06:12,206
and I asked him to hold me.
68
00:06:12,331 --> 00:06:14,166
(Sobs)
69
00:06:15,042 --> 00:06:19,088
And only after a long time,
did I finally get my bearings.
70
00:06:20,673 --> 00:06:23,217
But for one moment, earlier,
71
00:06:23,342 --> 00:06:26,888
it was as if a curtain had parted,
72
00:06:27,013 --> 00:06:29,932
and I could see myself clearly.
73
00:06:30,892 --> 00:06:33,728
But I was afraid of what I saw.
74
00:06:34,228 --> 00:06:35,897
(Sniffs)
75
00:06:36,022 --> 00:06:39,108
And what I had to look forward to.
76
00:06:40,109 --> 00:06:41,777
And I wondered...
77
00:06:43,529 --> 00:06:46,866
I wondered about ending everything.
78
00:07:29,450 --> 00:07:31,118
Please, please.
79
00:07:31,243 --> 00:07:37,124
It is with a mixture of some joy,
but mostly paralysing anxiety...
80
00:07:38,584 --> 00:07:42,088
...that I hereby plunge
into the big five-o.
81
00:07:47,009 --> 00:07:50,012
I was, uh, I was fine till last week.
82
00:07:50,680 --> 00:07:55,434
Then my son said to me, "Gee, Dad,
don't your options begin running out?"
83
00:07:57,186 --> 00:07:59,563
He's very funny, my son.
84
00:08:04,110 --> 00:08:07,363
Marion, I was telling Lydia
about your little adventure today.
85
00:08:07,488 --> 00:08:10,491
- Oh, yes.
- Those new buildings are built so thin.
86
00:08:10,616 --> 00:08:14,036
- No, this is an old brownstone.
- Well, there's no privacy left.
87
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:17,999
Last week, Lydia and I were at home.
It was a Sunday morning...
88
00:08:18,124 --> 00:08:21,293
- Mark...
- This is true. And we started kissing...
89
00:08:21,419 --> 00:08:24,922
- Mark!
- And next thing we were on the floor...
90
00:08:25,047 --> 00:08:28,259
- Are you crazy? He's drunk.
- I was having her on the kitchen floor.
91
00:08:28,384 --> 00:08:31,387
The living room floor,
the living room floor.
92
00:08:31,512 --> 00:08:35,141
- I gotta admit, it was a surprise.
- Did it not happen that way?
93
00:08:35,266 --> 00:08:40,229
So the door opens, and
the superintendent, he has the key...
94
00:08:40,354 --> 00:08:44,025
- Oh, no.
- Barges in. Some kind of plumbing leak.
95
00:08:44,150 --> 00:08:46,402
And we are in flagrante delicto.
96
00:08:46,527 --> 00:08:50,197
You know what he does? He gets up,
stark naked, and says "Mr Banducci,
97
00:08:50,322 --> 00:08:53,534
"this is not the pipe
that needs fixing."
98
00:08:53,659 --> 00:08:57,621
That was quick, Ken. Could you have
come up with anything that quick?
99
00:08:57,747 --> 00:09:00,541
- No.
- That was grace under pressure.
100
00:09:00,666 --> 00:09:02,710
- Did he laugh?
- Oh, no.
101
00:09:02,835 --> 00:09:05,880
He turned very red
and he crossed himself.
102
00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:09,675
Sad.
103
00:09:13,679 --> 00:09:17,767
One good thing about becoming 50.
You don't have to do it again.
104
00:09:24,607 --> 00:09:26,108
I know.
105
00:09:26,233 --> 00:09:30,571
It's Laura. She had another fight with
her mother, wants to sleep at our place.
106
00:09:30,696 --> 00:09:33,199
It's not fair to Kathy.
107
00:09:34,075 --> 00:09:38,245
Well, you tell her, cos once again
I can't get through to my daughter.
108
00:09:38,370 --> 00:09:41,082
I know. Just... hold on a minute.
109
00:09:41,207 --> 00:09:43,876
Will you talk to Marion? OK.
110
00:09:45,878 --> 00:09:48,672
Laura? This is not a good habit
to get into.
111
00:09:48,798 --> 00:09:52,885
You know your mother's high-strung.
She's just gonna get frantic.
112
00:09:53,010 --> 00:09:58,516
Well, it may not seem fair to you,
but it's up to you to deal with her moods.
113
00:10:00,309 --> 00:10:04,438
Well, if she can't,
then you just have to rise above it.
114
00:10:04,563 --> 00:10:08,150
OK? I'll see you
at my father's tomorrow.
115
00:10:08,275 --> 00:10:11,112
We'll talk about it then. OK.
116
00:10:11,237 --> 00:10:12,571
Bye-bye.
117
00:10:12,696 --> 00:10:16,408
She listens to you cos she looks up
to you. Me, there's no communication.
118
00:10:16,534 --> 00:10:19,620
It's just... It's a terrible situation.
119
00:10:20,746 --> 00:10:23,833
(♪ WEILL & BRECHT:
"The Bilbao Song" on piano)
120
00:10:25,876 --> 00:10:27,711
Hey.
121
00:10:28,712 --> 00:10:30,756
Take you back?
122
00:10:31,298 --> 00:10:33,342
God, yeah.
123
00:10:44,895 --> 00:10:49,525
Would you ever think of making love
to me on the living room floor?
124
00:10:53,154 --> 00:10:55,739
Would you want me to?
125
00:10:55,865 --> 00:10:58,701
I don't know. Would you want to?
126
00:10:59,785 --> 00:11:01,787
I don't know.
127
00:11:04,123 --> 00:11:08,294
Actually, I don't think I see you
as the hardwood floor type.
128
00:11:08,419 --> 00:11:09,837
No?
129
00:11:14,133 --> 00:11:17,678
Hey, Ken, what are you doing in there?
Have you eaten?
130
00:11:17,803 --> 00:11:21,056
Hello, Lydia. Look,
you know my wife pretty good.
131
00:11:21,182 --> 00:11:25,186
Would you say that she was the type
to enjoy sex on the living room floor?
132
00:11:25,311 --> 00:11:28,230
- Ken!
- Oh, my God. You know, you guys...
133
00:11:28,355 --> 00:11:31,817
- I'm only teasing.
- That was really embarrassing before.
134
00:11:31,942 --> 00:11:34,987
But not unpleasant
if you don't get splinters.
135
00:11:39,909 --> 00:11:44,455
(Marion) 'The following morning,
I'd agreed to meet my sister-in-law.
136
00:11:44,580 --> 00:11:48,876
'I waited as long as I could, but when
she didn't show up I decided to leave.'
137
00:11:49,001 --> 00:11:51,295
- Marion. I'm sorry.
- Oh, hi.
138
00:11:51,420 --> 00:11:55,591
- I got stuck in traffic.
- Oh. The thing is, I'm really late now.
139
00:11:55,716 --> 00:11:59,220
- Sorry. I just need a few minutes.
- Well, I'm so behind schedule.
140
00:11:59,345 --> 00:12:02,348
You said eight, and I waited,
but I've gotta get going.
141
00:12:02,473 --> 00:12:05,684
- Stupid bus wouldn't move.
- Maybe some other time.
142
00:12:05,809 --> 00:12:08,229
I've gotta be disciplined
when I'm writing, Lynn,
143
00:12:08,354 --> 00:12:11,315
otherwise I'm not gonna
get it done in time.
144
00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:13,442
I need to borrow some money.
145
00:12:13,567 --> 00:12:16,695
You know,
Paul and I are getting a divorce.
146
00:12:16,820 --> 00:12:19,073
I heard. I'm sorry.
147
00:12:19,198 --> 00:12:22,576
- Are you?
- Why do you say it like that?
148
00:12:23,869 --> 00:12:27,706
Because... I know you
never really approved of me.
149
00:12:27,831 --> 00:12:30,125
Why, I hardly know you.
150
00:12:30,251 --> 00:12:33,420
It's not from my lack of trying.
151
00:12:33,545 --> 00:12:37,633
Oh, look, I know this must all be
very upsetting to you. But, you know...
152
00:12:37,758 --> 00:12:39,927
I'm sorry.
153
00:12:40,052 --> 00:12:43,555
If you needed money,
how come Paul didn't ask me?
154
00:12:44,098 --> 00:12:46,850
Well... he wouldn't.
155
00:12:46,976 --> 00:12:49,395
Well, why not? He has before.
156
00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:54,608
Marion... don't you know
how he feels about you?
157
00:12:54,733 --> 00:12:57,695
Sure. We've always been very close.
158
00:12:59,280 --> 00:13:02,283
You're deluding yourself.
159
00:13:02,408 --> 00:13:05,452
Of course, in a way
he idolises you, but...
160
00:13:06,495 --> 00:13:08,914
he also hates you.
161
00:13:11,875 --> 00:13:14,169
I'm sorry, I don't accept that.
162
00:13:15,462 --> 00:13:17,589
You're such a perceptive woman.
163
00:13:17,715 --> 00:13:19,925
How can you not understand
his feelings?
164
00:13:20,050 --> 00:13:23,804
Look, um, I'm late, and...
and, uh...
165
00:13:25,014 --> 00:13:30,477
To tell you the truth, I make it a practice
of never getting into these conversations.
166
00:13:30,602 --> 00:13:34,606
They're fruitless, and people say things
that they're sorry for later.
167
00:13:34,732 --> 00:13:39,820
Why don't you just tell me how much
you need and I'll discuss it with Ken. OK?
168
00:13:44,783 --> 00:13:47,661
(Marion) 'The encounter with
my sister-in-law had left me angry,
169
00:13:47,786 --> 00:13:50,789
'but I refused to let it
interfere with my work.
170
00:13:51,248 --> 00:13:55,002
'I had a reasonably productive day,
but as late afternoon approached,
171
00:13:55,127 --> 00:13:57,963
'I began to feel anxious somehow.'
172
00:14:03,177 --> 00:14:06,722
(Woman) I really can't
believe I'm saying this.
173
00:14:08,974 --> 00:14:13,103
Lately, I've had odd feelings
about my marriage.
174
00:14:14,688 --> 00:14:18,150
It's as if it's been... coming apart.
175
00:14:19,485 --> 00:14:23,405
And I've just been,
in so many ways, denying it.
176
00:14:25,157 --> 00:14:27,493
I must admit,
177
00:14:27,618 --> 00:14:31,914
I have moments when I question
whether I made the right choice.
178
00:14:33,165 --> 00:14:36,085
I've told you there was
someone else once.
179
00:14:37,294 --> 00:14:40,672
The last time I saw him
was several years ago,
180
00:14:40,798 --> 00:14:43,634
before I was married, at a party.
181
00:14:43,759 --> 00:14:46,387
(♪ ERROLL GARNER:
"A Fine Romance")
182
00:14:56,980 --> 00:15:00,567
Stop it. Just stop it.
This is just crazy.
183
00:15:00,692 --> 00:15:03,112
I'm marrying Ken,
that's all there is to it.
184
00:15:03,237 --> 00:15:06,990
- How can you marry Ken? You love me.
- I... What? You're so conceited.
185
00:15:07,116 --> 00:15:09,410
What makes you think
that I love you?
186
00:15:09,535 --> 00:15:14,039
I know. There are some things
one knows just so surely as...
187
00:15:15,374 --> 00:15:19,753
Well, I-I... I'm... I... You're wrong,
and I'm sorry if I've misled you.
188
00:15:19,878 --> 00:15:23,382
- It's you you're misleading.
- I'm surprised at you.
189
00:15:24,007 --> 00:15:26,677
I mean, Ken is your close friend.
190
00:15:27,177 --> 00:15:31,473
I love everything about you, and
I want you to come and live with me...
191
00:15:31,598 --> 00:15:34,810
Stop it! Stop it. Right now.
192
00:15:35,727 --> 00:15:38,147
(Woman) Marion? We're toasting!
193
00:15:38,272 --> 00:15:40,357
Just go away.
194
00:15:43,944 --> 00:15:47,072
To Ken and Marion
on their big day next week.
195
00:15:48,282 --> 00:15:52,661
And to Marion's new book. German
philosophy will never be the same.
196
00:15:53,162 --> 00:15:54,580
Let's hope not.
197
00:15:54,705 --> 00:15:58,584
You'll go on for ever. Heidegger
definitely got what he deserved.
198
00:15:58,709 --> 00:16:01,545
Hey, I'd like to propose a toast.
199
00:16:01,670 --> 00:16:04,214
To good health and happiness.
200
00:16:05,174 --> 00:16:08,385
- Aren't you gonna drink to Marion?
- Yes, why not?
201
00:16:08,510 --> 00:16:11,096
I drink to Marion with my eyes.
202
00:16:11,889 --> 00:16:13,724
Smoothie. Old smoothie.
203
00:16:13,849 --> 00:16:15,893
(Doorbell)
204
00:16:25,944 --> 00:16:27,988
(All conversation stops)
205
00:16:31,658 --> 00:16:34,119
I was just returning some things.
206
00:16:37,664 --> 00:16:40,167
You could stop staring.
207
00:16:40,292 --> 00:16:42,628
I'm not a ghost.
208
00:16:44,004 --> 00:16:48,133
Well, we did spend a few years together,
had a child together, in this house.
209
00:16:48,884 --> 00:16:51,345
I wish you'd called.
210
00:16:51,470 --> 00:16:53,347
I'm not staying.
211
00:16:53,472 --> 00:16:57,100
Although some of these people
used to be my friends too.
212
00:16:59,561 --> 00:17:02,022
- Would you like a drink?
- Kitty...
213
00:17:02,147 --> 00:17:04,691
Don't panic, I'm not accepting.
214
00:17:05,359 --> 00:17:09,488
These are artefacts from more
civilised days between us.
215
00:17:09,947 --> 00:17:13,450
(Ken) I think perhaps you should
just leave them and go.
216
00:17:13,575 --> 00:17:15,452
Which one's Marion?
217
00:17:16,453 --> 00:17:17,704
I am.
218
00:17:17,829 --> 00:17:19,665
Kathy, this is in terrible taste,
you know.
219
00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:22,459
Oh, my ex-husband
is an authority on taste!
220
00:17:22,584 --> 00:17:27,673
Now what does Emily Post say about
adultery with a philosophy professor
221
00:17:27,798 --> 00:17:31,843
in a Holiday Inn while his wife is in
the hospital having her ovaries removed?
222
00:17:31,969 --> 00:17:34,930
- OK, that's enough. Now please leave.
- Ah, jeez.
223
00:17:35,055 --> 00:17:37,432
I realise that you've been hurt,
224
00:17:37,558 --> 00:17:40,686
and if I've done anything wrong,
I am sorry.
225
00:17:40,811 --> 00:17:43,814
Forgive me.
I accept your condemnation.
226
00:17:50,362 --> 00:17:51,863
I'm so sorry.
227
00:17:54,283 --> 00:17:56,368
(♪ ERROLL GARNER:
"Make Believe")
228
00:18:12,509 --> 00:18:15,554
What can I say to change your heart?
229
00:18:17,222 --> 00:18:19,600
I'm really amazed at you.
230
00:18:19,725 --> 00:18:24,187
He's your friend. He's just... He's just
had an embarrassing experience.
231
00:18:24,771 --> 00:18:27,733
Yes, he is my friend.
And I love him.
232
00:18:28,233 --> 00:18:31,320
But he's a prig.
He's cold and he's stuffy.
233
00:18:33,864 --> 00:18:38,410
Can't you see that?
"I accept your condemnation." Jesus!
234
00:18:39,911 --> 00:18:42,914
He handled a very difficult moment
quite well.
235
00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:45,834
Oh, too well. Do you like that?
236
00:18:46,376 --> 00:18:48,211
He's a snob.
237
00:18:48,337 --> 00:18:51,048
He's a wonderful man.
238
00:18:51,173 --> 00:18:53,967
And he's... he's a terrific doctor.
239
00:18:55,135 --> 00:18:58,096
He's cultured and he's honourable.
240
00:18:58,639 --> 00:19:01,350
I love to be with him. I... I...
241
00:19:01,892 --> 00:19:06,271
- I love reading books with him, and...
- It's all up here. All up here.
242
00:19:06,396 --> 00:19:08,607
And he's sexy.
243
00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:12,819
Adultery in the Holiday Inn?
Did they take a credit card?
244
00:19:14,613 --> 00:19:17,449
He would never try to undermine you.
245
00:19:18,950 --> 00:19:21,828
Even if he loved a woman passionately?
246
00:19:28,627 --> 00:19:31,171
Maybe we should join the others.
247
00:19:31,296 --> 00:19:33,799
Maybe I was wrong about you.
248
00:19:35,384 --> 00:19:37,344
Maybe you're two of a kind.
249
00:19:37,469 --> 00:19:39,471
Maybe you've had
too much champagne.
250
00:19:39,596 --> 00:19:42,182
Maybe this conversation
is scaring you.
251
00:19:42,307 --> 00:19:44,393
I have to go.
252
00:19:45,018 --> 00:19:47,646
Why don't you do that?
253
00:19:55,654 --> 00:19:58,156
(Woman) 'I often wonder
about real love.'
254
00:19:58,990 --> 00:20:02,994
Or should I say,
I keep myself from thinking about it.
255
00:20:04,329 --> 00:20:07,708
- I don't mean the kind I've experienced.
- (Door buzzer)
256
00:20:07,833 --> 00:20:12,546
It's deeper, much more intense.
And then I become frightened.
257
00:20:14,131 --> 00:20:16,341
Because I feel too much...
258
00:20:24,641 --> 00:20:27,227
- Hi. How are you?
- Fine.
259
00:20:27,352 --> 00:20:31,231
This is great, this is really nice.
I like it a lot. So are you ready?
260
00:20:31,356 --> 00:20:33,775
- Sure.
- I'm sorry, am I too early?
261
00:20:33,900 --> 00:20:37,320
- Oh, no.
- So I'm here on time? OK, great.
262
00:20:37,446 --> 00:20:42,743
- You know your dad's not coming?
- Yes. I spoke with him. Are you all right?
263
00:20:42,868 --> 00:20:44,202
- Me?
- You just...
264
00:20:44,327 --> 00:20:46,788
- No, sure, I'm fine.
- OK.
265
00:20:46,913 --> 00:20:51,543
All right, well, we should get going
then, so we can beat the traffic.
266
00:21:05,265 --> 00:21:10,145
(Father) I've gathered a number of your
mother's possessions and mementos.
267
00:21:10,270 --> 00:21:12,814
Pictures, letters.
268
00:21:12,939 --> 00:21:15,400
You may as well have them.
269
00:21:15,525 --> 00:21:19,029
I just can't seem to bring myself
to throw them away.
270
00:21:19,154 --> 00:21:21,364
Has it been unbearable,
these past few months?
271
00:21:21,490 --> 00:21:24,284
I've managed to keep myself busy.
272
00:21:24,409 --> 00:21:28,622
- I wish you'd consider moving to the city.
- I'm fine right here.
273
00:21:29,581 --> 00:21:34,628
Clara comes in. She cleans and cooks
for me the way she always has,
274
00:21:34,753 --> 00:21:37,380
so that's no different.
275
00:21:37,506 --> 00:21:40,926
Twice a year, the board
of the Smithsonian meets.
276
00:21:41,426 --> 00:21:46,765
That gets me down to Washington,
and takes up some of my time.
277
00:21:49,434 --> 00:21:52,395
I'm all right. I'm fine right here.
278
00:21:52,521 --> 00:21:56,733
But you want nothing around
to even remind you of Mother?
279
00:21:56,858 --> 00:22:02,489
Well, there are times when even
a historian shouldn't look at the past.
280
00:22:02,614 --> 00:22:06,159
You think at your age you can meet
someone and fall in love again?
281
00:22:06,284 --> 00:22:10,622
One hopes at my age
to build up an immunity.
282
00:22:13,458 --> 00:22:17,337
Are you aware that Paul and Lynn
are getting a divorce?
283
00:22:17,462 --> 00:22:22,133
Nothing Paul does would surprise me,
and I'd much rather not hear about him.
284
00:22:22,259 --> 00:22:26,137
- He's had bad luck.
- He's had the same chances you've had.
285
00:22:27,055 --> 00:22:31,184
It's just that he doesn't have it
inside him to stick with anything.
286
00:22:31,309 --> 00:22:36,189
- I hope you're not still giving him money.
- No, just, you know, now and then.
287
00:22:36,815 --> 00:22:41,695
I've salvaged him
from more financial messes,
288
00:22:41,820 --> 00:22:46,032
and I've spent more money doing it,
than I care to tell you.
289
00:22:46,157 --> 00:22:51,705
Someday he'll defraud somebody
in one of his so-called business ventures.
290
00:22:52,205 --> 00:22:54,583
And he'll go to jail.
291
00:22:55,792 --> 00:22:58,503
(♪ BACH: "Sonata for Cello
and Piano No. 2")
292
00:22:58,628 --> 00:23:02,424
I noticed you sort of gave me
a disapproving look at dinner.
293
00:23:03,842 --> 00:23:07,387
Well, I didn't think it was very
sensitive of you to ask my father
294
00:23:07,512 --> 00:23:10,599
whether at his age
he could still fall in love.
295
00:23:10,724 --> 00:23:15,312
- Well, he didn't take it badly.
- No, but it just isn't very tactful.
296
00:23:15,437 --> 00:23:18,315
He's old now.
He doesn't have to be reminded of it.
297
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:20,191
I'm sorry.
298
00:23:20,317 --> 00:23:23,194
It's OK, it's just...
299
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:26,031
Never mind, it's... youth.
300
00:23:26,156 --> 00:23:28,450
Here are the photos.
301
00:23:29,618 --> 00:23:32,954
And here's my mother's jewellery.
Such as it is.
302
00:23:33,705 --> 00:23:36,958
They were never ones
for sentimental possessions.
303
00:23:37,918 --> 00:23:40,629
Here's her book of Rilke's poems.
304
00:23:40,754 --> 00:23:45,258
You know, she was the one who
first introduced me to German poetry.
305
00:23:46,301 --> 00:23:49,387
And there's a picture
of the house in the fall.
306
00:23:49,512 --> 00:23:53,099
'That's really nice.
Oh, there we are in the kitchen.
307
00:23:53,224 --> 00:23:56,728
'And there's Clara.
Look how young you were here, Clara.
308
00:23:56,853 --> 00:24:01,399
'You were so good to us. I can still
taste the cookies you used to bake.
309
00:24:01,524 --> 00:24:06,279
'You used to sit up with us when we had
those miserable colds. You were a saint.
310
00:24:06,404 --> 00:24:11,409
'Oh, and here I am, older. I could go up
to the spare room and paint for hours.
311
00:24:11,534 --> 00:24:14,621
'The time would just fly by
when I was doing a picture.
312
00:24:14,746 --> 00:24:18,792
'And there I am with my friend Claire.
You know, she became an actress.
313
00:24:18,917 --> 00:24:22,587
'We used to be so close,
but I haven't seen her in years.
314
00:24:23,922 --> 00:24:28,259
'And there's my mother.
She loved strolling around the grounds.
315
00:24:28,969 --> 00:24:33,264
'She loved all beautiful things.
She loved nature, music, poetry.
316
00:24:33,807 --> 00:24:36,726
'That was her whole existence.'
317
00:24:40,772 --> 00:24:45,026
- Paul? I'd like to discuss something.
- Yes, Dad?
318
00:24:45,151 --> 00:24:48,446
I've had a talk with my brother Ben.
319
00:24:48,571 --> 00:24:53,034
And he has promised me that he will find
a position for you next season in his firm.
320
00:24:53,159 --> 00:24:55,662
I don't wanna work
in a cardboard box factory.
321
00:24:55,787 --> 00:25:01,334
- It's paper products, Paul, not just boxes.
- But I tried it once. I go nuts.
322
00:25:01,459 --> 00:25:02,877
Paul...
323
00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:07,215
There are some obligations
one must accept.
324
00:25:07,924 --> 00:25:10,468
This has not been a good year.
325
00:25:10,969 --> 00:25:14,723
Your mother is very ill,
and I have decided to take time off
326
00:25:14,848 --> 00:25:17,517
to finish my study on
the Continental Congress.
327
00:25:17,642 --> 00:25:20,687
It's important that
there is enough money
328
00:25:20,812 --> 00:25:22,981
to see that Marion
can go away to college.
329
00:25:23,106 --> 00:25:26,651
I want her to take that scholarship.
She is such a brilliant girl.
330
00:25:26,776 --> 00:25:28,611
But I had other plans.
331
00:25:28,737 --> 00:25:32,741
I'm sure those plans included
card-playing and time-wasting.
332
00:25:32,866 --> 00:25:37,078
- That's not fair.
- Paul, your grades are mediocre.
333
00:25:37,203 --> 00:25:42,292
It's not because you're not smart enough,
it's simply that you don't apply yourself.
334
00:25:42,417 --> 00:25:44,961
I know. And Marion's a genius.
335
00:25:45,879 --> 00:25:49,090
She has the opportunity
to go to Bryn Mawr.
336
00:25:50,008 --> 00:25:52,886
- Do you want to prevent her?
- No.
337
00:25:53,636 --> 00:25:58,558
She's going to be something. She's got
what it takes. There are no limits for her.
338
00:25:59,809 --> 00:26:05,023
If only I could stop her daydreaming in
the woods with her beloved watercolours.
339
00:26:16,576 --> 00:26:18,078
(Marion) Paul?
340
00:26:20,705 --> 00:26:22,082
What's wrong?
341
00:26:22,207 --> 00:26:25,835
He's making me go to work
in the paper box factory.
342
00:26:26,711 --> 00:26:29,547
- Well, what do you wanna do?
- I don't know.
343
00:26:29,672 --> 00:26:34,260
Move out of the house, travel,
find some interesting business,
344
00:26:34,385 --> 00:26:37,347
anything but work
in a paper box factory.
345
00:26:38,098 --> 00:26:41,017
I hate him. Both of them.
346
00:26:41,726 --> 00:26:44,187
They live in their own world.
347
00:26:44,312 --> 00:26:47,857
(♪ BACH: "Sonata for Cello
and Piano No. 2")
348
00:27:07,752 --> 00:27:11,172
- Is this close enough?
- Yeah, I'm meeting Scott right up here.
349
00:27:11,297 --> 00:27:16,010
Why don't you come? He'd love to meet
you, and I've told him a lot about you.
350
00:27:16,136 --> 00:27:19,389
Thank you, honey, but I'm really tired.
351
00:27:19,514 --> 00:27:22,225
- Can I take a rain check?
- Come on, just for one beer.
352
00:27:22,350 --> 00:27:25,645
It's really early,
and Dad's not gonna be home yet.
353
00:27:26,479 --> 00:27:28,648
Do you see someone?
354
00:27:28,773 --> 00:27:31,192
- I do.
- Who?
355
00:27:31,860 --> 00:27:36,781
It's just, uh... it's an acquaintance
of mine, it's a woman I know.
356
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:42,745
All right, well, thanks a lot.
I had a terrific time.
357
00:27:42,871 --> 00:27:45,456
- OK.
- OK. Bye.
358
00:29:05,203 --> 00:29:08,248
I forgot half of that speech tonight...
359
00:29:09,874 --> 00:29:11,918
Marion. I...
360
00:29:12,043 --> 00:29:15,088
- Claire?
- It's you. It is you. It is.
361
00:29:15,213 --> 00:29:19,050
- Claire? I was just talking about you.
- Yes?
362
00:29:19,175 --> 00:29:22,220
I was going through old photos
at my father's house.
363
00:29:22,345 --> 00:29:24,639
What are you doing here?
364
00:29:24,764 --> 00:29:29,102
- I'm doing a play. And it's closing, but...
- You're in a show?
365
00:29:29,227 --> 00:29:32,438
Yes. I guess you don't read
the theatre section of the paper.
366
00:29:32,563 --> 00:29:35,608
Well, yes, I do,
but I just had no idea.
367
00:29:37,527 --> 00:29:41,698
I'm sorry, what am I doing? I'm sorry.
This is my husband, this is Jack.
368
00:29:41,823 --> 00:29:43,950
- Marion Post.
- Nice to meet you.
369
00:29:44,075 --> 00:29:48,079
Oh, my goodness. Claire,
I have wondered about you so often.
370
00:29:48,204 --> 00:29:52,709
- Well, we live in Monterey now.
- Really? Do you have time for a drink?
371
00:29:52,834 --> 00:29:57,338
- Sorry, we're meeting some friends.
- No, we have time till our appointment.
372
00:29:57,463 --> 00:30:00,466
- Do we?
- Oh, great. There must be a place here.
373
00:30:00,591 --> 00:30:04,095
- Come on, this way. Straight ahead.
- I just...
374
00:30:10,768 --> 00:30:15,315
(Marion)...Amnesty International and
ACLU. Then they were on the same day.
375
00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:19,986
(Jack) Listen, you gotta be kidding me.
Are you saying that you are
376
00:30:20,111 --> 00:30:24,365
a member of Amnesty International
and the American Civil Liberties Union?
377
00:30:24,490 --> 00:30:27,452
Marion always had the urge
to save humanity, didn't you?
378
00:30:27,577 --> 00:30:30,538
Just give me a flood or a famine.
Ken too.
379
00:30:30,663 --> 00:30:34,167
- Where do you find the time?
- It doesn't work out all the time.
380
00:30:34,292 --> 00:30:37,587
And head of the philosophy
department. It's impossible.
381
00:30:37,712 --> 00:30:41,007
I took two years of philosophy,
University of Chicago.
382
00:30:41,132 --> 00:30:45,928
- They've got a great department.
- It was good, before they made me leave.
383
00:30:46,054 --> 00:30:49,474
And Claire, you never told me
about this chapter in your life.
384
00:30:49,599 --> 00:30:52,185
- I thought I had.
- We were so close.
385
00:30:52,310 --> 00:30:55,563
- It was clear she'd be a gifted actress.
- No...
386
00:30:55,688 --> 00:30:59,817
Don't you believe her.
This woman always had that flair.
387
00:30:59,942 --> 00:31:03,863
Do you get to the theatre much?
I guess not with your schedule.
388
00:31:03,988 --> 00:31:08,201
I do. My husband really prefers
the opera, but there's so little to see.
389
00:31:08,326 --> 00:31:12,205
- I used to be a devoted Brechtian.
- I staged some Brecht.
390
00:31:12,330 --> 00:31:14,582
- Did you?
- Yes. "Mother Courage."
391
00:31:14,707 --> 00:31:17,877
- Not the one here?
- Yes, the one here. Did you see it?
392
00:31:18,002 --> 00:31:23,091
Sure I saw it. That's the most intelligent
rendering of that play I've ever seen.
393
00:31:23,216 --> 00:31:26,219
- That's sweet of you.
- I had problems with the translation.
394
00:31:26,344 --> 00:31:29,222
Some of the speeches
could have been a little better.
395
00:31:29,347 --> 00:31:31,682
Exactly.
The translation was awkward.
396
00:31:31,808 --> 00:31:34,227
But you did a terrific job.
Really terrific.
397
00:31:34,352 --> 00:31:37,271
Hey, hey. Hey!
398
00:31:37,397 --> 00:31:40,650
Look at me once in a while.
I'm your wife, not her.
399
00:31:40,775 --> 00:31:41,943
Huh?
400
00:31:42,068 --> 00:31:45,029
You've been hanging on her
every word since we sat down.
401
00:31:45,154 --> 00:31:46,864
You're embarrassing me.
402
00:31:46,989 --> 00:31:50,910
Jack is very impressed by certain things
which I apparently cannot give him.
403
00:31:51,035 --> 00:31:52,537
Claire, take it easy.
404
00:31:52,662 --> 00:31:57,083
Do you deny he's been looking
into your eyes for over an hour?
405
00:31:57,208 --> 00:32:01,254
- I don't think you heard one word I said.
- You're a little drunk.
406
00:32:01,379 --> 00:32:05,425
- If you'd rather be alone with her...
- Claire, stop it, this is foolish.
407
00:32:05,550 --> 00:32:09,512
- We're just having a nice chat.
- Don't play so innocent with me.
408
00:32:09,637 --> 00:32:12,056
- This wouldn't be the first time.
- (Jack) Stop this!
409
00:32:12,181 --> 00:32:14,892
- What does that mean?
- Let's go, Claire. Sorry, Marion.
410
00:32:15,017 --> 00:32:16,894
We've been in this situation before,
411
00:32:17,019 --> 00:32:21,441
where you so innocently wound up
causing me to doubt my whole life.
412
00:32:21,566 --> 00:32:24,610
Claire, you're being awfully theatrical.
413
00:32:24,735 --> 00:32:26,946
I don't know what you're talking about.
414
00:32:27,071 --> 00:32:30,992
We didn't just drift apart, Marion.
I withdrew.
415
00:32:32,785 --> 00:32:36,372
- You're not talking about David?
- Then you do know.
416
00:32:37,165 --> 00:32:41,461
- I know I never had any interest in him.
- But you knew how much I cared for him.
417
00:32:41,586 --> 00:32:47,049
I had nothing to do with him. And I never
gave him a shred of encouragement.
418
00:32:47,175 --> 00:32:48,843
That's not true.
419
00:32:48,968 --> 00:32:54,557
Your conversations were full of subtle
flirtations, full of meaningful little looks,
420
00:32:54,682 --> 00:33:00,271
and... little gambits
designed to seduce.
421
00:33:01,189 --> 00:33:03,566
That's so untrue.
422
00:33:03,691 --> 00:33:05,735
And you've held that against me?
423
00:33:05,860 --> 00:33:09,822
He couldn't see anything except
how infatuated he was with you.
424
00:33:09,947 --> 00:33:13,910
We never spent a single moment alone.
I never had anything to do with him.
425
00:33:14,035 --> 00:33:19,707
And I say you seduced him. You just
turned it on whenever he was around.
426
00:33:19,832 --> 00:33:22,502
Maybe you didn't even know
that you were doing it.
427
00:33:22,627 --> 00:33:25,505
Claire, let's get off the subject.
428
00:33:25,963 --> 00:33:28,424
I must've seemed
very bland to him after you.
429
00:33:28,549 --> 00:33:30,551
This is nonsense!
430
00:33:30,676 --> 00:33:34,222
To have backed off of a close friendship
because of some fantasy?
431
00:33:34,347 --> 00:33:37,141
I'm sure I brought it on myself.
I was so proud of you.
432
00:33:37,266 --> 00:33:43,022
You were my best friend. You were so
witty and so quick, and I was so naive.
433
00:33:43,147 --> 00:33:46,901
Of course you would want David
to fall for you. He was exceptional.
434
00:33:47,026 --> 00:33:49,237
I never accepted his overtures.
435
00:33:49,362 --> 00:33:52,198
I told him he was going with you
and it was out of the question.
436
00:33:52,323 --> 00:33:55,785
- By that time you had what you wanted.
- That's absurd.
437
00:33:56,494 --> 00:34:00,206
I really believe that you may not
have realised what you were doing.
438
00:34:00,331 --> 00:34:03,960
This is outrageous.
You should never drink.
439
00:34:04,085 --> 00:34:09,674
I swear to you, it was never in my mind.
Not consciously or subconsciously or...
440
00:34:09,799 --> 00:34:14,679
Think about it. Just think about it
sometime. You should be the actress.
441
00:34:25,356 --> 00:34:27,942
(Marion) 'When I got home,
Ken was asleep.
442
00:34:28,067 --> 00:34:30,820
'I was too shaken up
to go to bed.
443
00:34:30,945 --> 00:34:34,365
'The incident with Claire had left me
edgy and uncomfortable.
444
00:34:34,490 --> 00:34:37,827
'I thought if I read for a while,
it might relax me.
445
00:34:37,952 --> 00:34:40,913
'I thumbed through
my mother's edition of Rilke.
446
00:34:41,956 --> 00:34:47,128
'When I was 16, I had done a paper
on his poem about the panther,
447
00:34:47,253 --> 00:34:51,757
'and on the image that the panther
saw as it stared out from its cage.
448
00:34:51,882 --> 00:34:55,386
'And that image, I concluded,
could only be death.
449
00:34:57,430 --> 00:35:00,975
'Then I saw my mother's
favourite poem,
450
00:35:01,100 --> 00:35:03,853
'''Archaic Torso of Apollo".
451
00:35:05,730 --> 00:35:10,192
'There were stains on the page,
which I believe were her tears.
452
00:35:12,236 --> 00:35:15,156
'They fell across the last line.
453
00:35:16,657 --> 00:35:20,578
'''For here there is no place
that does not see you.
454
00:35:22,747 --> 00:35:25,666
'''You must change your life.'''
455
00:35:29,045 --> 00:35:31,339
(Ken) You got in late last night.
456
00:35:31,464 --> 00:35:34,258
(Marion) I ran into an old friend.
457
00:35:34,383 --> 00:35:38,554
Then I didn't sleep. I don't think
I closed my eyes for ten minutes.
458
00:35:38,679 --> 00:35:41,641
I don't know how you do it.
I'd collapse.
459
00:35:41,766 --> 00:35:44,769
We're going to the concert
with Mark and Lydia tonight.
460
00:35:44,894 --> 00:35:48,230
I'm good for today,
it's tomorrow I'll feel it.
461
00:35:49,398 --> 00:35:52,985
Yeah, but tomorrow we're going
to Tom and Eleanor's for dinner.
462
00:35:53,110 --> 00:35:57,698
And Friday, Mark and Lydia are
taking us out for our anniversary.
463
00:35:57,823 --> 00:36:01,994
- Is it our anniversary already?
- Yeah. Goes quickly, doesn't it?
464
00:36:05,414 --> 00:36:07,458
What's the matter?
465
00:36:07,583 --> 00:36:09,627
I don't know.
466
00:36:11,003 --> 00:36:13,047
What is it?
467
00:36:13,839 --> 00:36:17,176
Well, you know, shouldn't we spend
our anniversary alone?
468
00:36:17,301 --> 00:36:21,514
We could go to the restaurant
where we had our first night together.
469
00:36:21,639 --> 00:36:23,849
In Philadelphia?
470
00:36:28,479 --> 00:36:30,481
Hold me.
471
00:36:33,484 --> 00:36:35,319
Hey.
472
00:36:37,279 --> 00:36:38,698
Honey.
473
00:36:41,742 --> 00:36:44,453
I've already found your present.
474
00:36:51,711 --> 00:36:55,089
Did I seduce you away from your wife?
475
00:36:57,341 --> 00:37:00,261
No, I seduced you,
don't you remember?
476
00:37:01,303 --> 00:37:06,058
Then I was worried in case you wouldn't
consider me because I was married.
477
00:37:08,185 --> 00:37:09,729
Well...
478
00:37:09,854 --> 00:37:14,400
So how was it with Laura last night?
You know that kid idolises you.
479
00:37:14,525 --> 00:37:15,943
Yeah.
480
00:37:17,153 --> 00:37:22,032
I'd better get going, I guess. I have to
stop at the library on my way downtown.
481
00:37:22,158 --> 00:37:23,576
OK.
482
00:37:44,722 --> 00:37:47,349
(Psychiatrist) You're silent today.
483
00:37:47,475 --> 00:37:50,144
Usually you're quite talkative.
484
00:37:51,812 --> 00:37:54,899
(Woman) Yeah, I...
I-I have nothing to say.
485
00:37:57,902 --> 00:38:00,112
(Psychiatrist) Mm-hm.
486
00:38:08,078 --> 00:38:11,373
(Woman) I... That is,
I have nothing to report.
487
00:38:15,294 --> 00:38:17,797
(Psychiatrist) Are you angry?
488
00:38:19,423 --> 00:38:22,218
(Woman) No, not that I'm aware of.
489
00:38:22,343 --> 00:38:25,638
(Psychiatrist)
But you have nothing to say?
490
00:38:26,388 --> 00:38:28,224
(Woman) No.
491
00:38:39,443 --> 00:38:42,530
(♪ VARÈSE: "Ecuatorial")
492
00:39:35,833 --> 00:39:39,086
(Laura) She saw us, Scott.
I asked you to lock the door.
493
00:39:39,211 --> 00:39:41,714
(Scott) You said they were
walking in the woods.
494
00:39:41,839 --> 00:39:45,926
(Laura) Dad said he was uncomfortable
about us being here for the weekend,
495
00:39:46,051 --> 00:39:51,265
and I tried to explain, make him trust me,
and I said it would be all right, and this...
496
00:39:51,390 --> 00:39:55,185
- Come on, I'm sure she's sophisticated.
- Yeah, you don't know Marion.
497
00:39:55,311 --> 00:39:59,607
- I thought you said she was pretty hip.
- Yeah, she is, she's great. She's...
498
00:39:59,732 --> 00:40:03,736
She's great. She...
I dunno, it's just that she's, um...
499
00:40:05,070 --> 00:40:07,698
She's a little... judgemental.
500
00:40:07,823 --> 00:40:13,078
You know? She sort of stands
above people and evaluates them.
501
00:40:13,871 --> 00:40:16,832
I've heard her make remarks
about her brother, and...
502
00:40:16,957 --> 00:40:20,920
I always think that she's gonna
judge me that way. I dunno.
503
00:40:21,045 --> 00:40:25,716
I just... Now I feel really cheap
for some reason.
504
00:40:26,425 --> 00:40:28,135
- (Scott) Cheap?
- Yes.
505
00:40:28,260 --> 00:40:29,637
- Cheap?
- (Laughs) Yes.
506
00:40:29,762 --> 00:40:32,264
- I thought it was very romantic.
- It was.
507
00:40:32,389 --> 00:40:35,267
(Scott) With the fire, and the wine...
508
00:40:35,893 --> 00:40:37,895
(Laura) Yeah. It was.
509
00:40:40,147 --> 00:40:42,942
(Marion) 'I couldn't work
anymore that day.
510
00:40:43,067 --> 00:40:45,736
'I felt I needed some fresh air.
511
00:40:46,737 --> 00:40:48,739
'I walked the streets aimlessly,
512
00:40:48,864 --> 00:40:52,826
just trying to put some
jumbled thoughts in order.
513
00:40:52,952 --> 00:40:54,787
'I don't know how long I wandered,
514
00:40:54,912 --> 00:40:58,916
'but when I looked up
I was quite far from my writing room.'
515
00:41:17,893 --> 00:41:19,937
What's happened?
516
00:41:21,397 --> 00:41:23,440
I don't know.
517
00:41:25,401 --> 00:41:28,195
Well, what are you doing here?
518
00:41:32,908 --> 00:41:36,787
- Something must be wrong.
- Oh, don't say that.
519
00:41:38,122 --> 00:41:41,959
Marion, you don't seek out
my company very often.
520
00:41:42,835 --> 00:41:45,212
You must need something.
521
00:41:45,337 --> 00:41:47,923
Yes, I do need something.
522
00:41:48,048 --> 00:41:51,051
Only I don't know what it is, exactly.
523
00:41:52,428 --> 00:41:57,141
- Well, what do I have I could offer?
- You can be honest with me, Paul.
524
00:41:57,808 --> 00:42:00,853
You and I were so close
when we were young.
525
00:42:03,605 --> 00:42:05,858
How honest do you want me to be?
526
00:42:05,983 --> 00:42:11,113
It was just today that I realised how long
it's been since we've even spoken.
527
00:42:11,238 --> 00:42:12,489
Well...
528
00:42:13,991 --> 00:42:18,871
I gave up pursuing you when I realised
how uncomfortable it made you feel.
529
00:42:18,996 --> 00:42:22,750
- That's not true.
- Don't deny it. Come on, Marion.
530
00:42:25,961 --> 00:42:28,005
You know...
531
00:42:28,672 --> 00:42:32,885
I realised... that I disappointed you.
532
00:42:33,010 --> 00:42:37,848
And worse, I realised that I embarrass
you. How I live and who I marry...
533
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:44,271
Of course, that's falling apart now,
so we don't have to worry about it.
534
00:42:44,396 --> 00:42:47,232
She wants me to work
for Cousin Andrew.
535
00:42:52,780 --> 00:42:58,494
But she's right, because I never have
supported her and the kids properly.
536
00:42:58,619 --> 00:43:02,081
Well, would that be so awful?
Working for Andrew?
537
00:43:04,291 --> 00:43:06,668
You used to say that.
538
00:43:06,794 --> 00:43:09,922
I know. I know I did, but...
539
00:43:10,047 --> 00:43:13,592
- Times change.
- Yeah, they certainly do.
540
00:43:14,676 --> 00:43:17,596
Do you remember, some years ago,
541
00:43:17,721 --> 00:43:22,726
when I showed you something
I'd written? Remember what you said?
542
00:43:23,519 --> 00:43:27,648
No, I don't remember. I was
probably just trying to be truthful.
543
00:43:28,565 --> 00:43:33,487
Yes, I'm sure.
You said, "This is overblown.
544
00:43:33,612 --> 00:43:36,156
"It's too emotional. It's maudlin.
545
00:43:36,281 --> 00:43:42,037
"Your dreams may be meaningful to you,
but to the objective observer, they're...
546
00:43:42,162 --> 00:43:44,748
"It's so embarrassing."
547
00:43:45,749 --> 00:43:47,543
I said that?
548
00:43:47,668 --> 00:43:50,170
Exactly your words.
549
00:43:52,589 --> 00:43:55,259
So I try not to embarrass you...
550
00:43:55,384 --> 00:43:57,469
any more.
551
00:44:03,142 --> 00:44:05,185
I should go.
552
00:44:06,979 --> 00:44:10,274
(♪ MAHLER:
"Symphony No. 4 in G Major")
553
00:44:26,790 --> 00:44:30,669
I've spent all afternoon trying to think
of a great place to take you two
554
00:44:30,794 --> 00:44:33,088
to celebrate your anniversary on Friday.
555
00:44:33,213 --> 00:44:36,466
What's wrong with the hotel
in Philadelphia
556
00:44:36,592 --> 00:44:40,762
where you had your first
illicit moments of passion?
557
00:44:40,888 --> 00:44:45,017
- You see? He thinks like you think.
- He drinks, not thinks.
558
00:44:45,142 --> 00:44:50,814
I should drink. I should drink. If I ever
started drinking... This is not drinking.
559
00:44:50,939 --> 00:44:54,193
Excuse me,
I'm sorry to disturb you, but...
560
00:44:54,818 --> 00:44:58,864
I was a pupil of yours
20 years ago in Vermont.
561
00:44:58,989 --> 00:45:01,992
Cynthia Frank?
You probably won't remember, but...
562
00:45:02,117 --> 00:45:04,203
Yes, I do. I do remember you.
563
00:45:04,328 --> 00:45:06,997
- You changed my life.
- I did?
564
00:45:07,122 --> 00:45:11,793
You... she was the inspiration for every
woman in the philosophy department.
565
00:45:11,919 --> 00:45:16,256
- That's very kind of you.
- I still remember the lectures so clearly.
566
00:45:16,381 --> 00:45:22,221
There was a particular talk you gave
on ethics and moral responsibility that...
567
00:45:22,804 --> 00:45:28,185
Well, your ideas were amazing to me,
and they're still amazing to me.
568
00:45:29,603 --> 00:45:32,689
Well, I didn't mean to interrupt,
but I wanted to tell you.
569
00:45:32,814 --> 00:45:37,819
I've seen you here before, and I never
was able to say that you changed my life.
570
00:45:37,945 --> 00:45:39,363
Thanks.
571
00:45:39,488 --> 00:45:42,616
(Mark) Hey, all right.
All right. Well done.
572
00:45:42,741 --> 00:45:45,369
Do you remember that lecture?
573
00:45:45,494 --> 00:45:48,914
It's terrific that
she just turned around and...
574
00:45:49,039 --> 00:45:51,500
(Lydia) It's very touching.
575
00:45:52,668 --> 00:45:55,003
(Marion) 'I had spent
a second sleepless night,
576
00:45:55,128 --> 00:45:57,881
'and the following day at work
I really felt it.
577
00:45:58,382 --> 00:46:03,011
'I couldn't write at all,
and what little I did try was forced.
578
00:46:03,136 --> 00:46:07,307
'Usually I can't sleep in the day,
but I was exhausted.
579
00:46:07,432 --> 00:46:10,519
'I closed my eyes for a few minutes,
580
00:46:10,644 --> 00:46:13,438
'and that's when the dream
must have come.'
581
00:46:14,481 --> 00:46:17,609
(Psychiatrist)
You're not gonna say anything?
582
00:46:19,736 --> 00:46:23,073
You haven't said a thing,
and your hour's almost up.
583
00:46:25,659 --> 00:46:28,495
I don't believe you have nothing to say.
584
00:46:31,081 --> 00:46:33,792
I think it's because you're angry.
585
00:46:35,252 --> 00:46:37,963
Too choked with rage to speak.
586
00:46:38,088 --> 00:46:40,757
What is it that enrages you?
587
00:46:48,724 --> 00:46:50,767
(Woman) Life.
588
00:46:51,476 --> 00:46:56,148
- Life?
- The... the universe.
589
00:46:56,273 --> 00:46:59,318
The cruelty, the injustice.
590
00:46:59,443 --> 00:47:01,945
The suffering of humanity.
591
00:47:02,070 --> 00:47:05,741
Illness, ageing... death.
592
00:47:05,866 --> 00:47:10,912
All very abstract. "Humanity."
Don't worry about humanity all the time.
593
00:47:11,038 --> 00:47:13,457
Get your own life in order.
594
00:47:14,291 --> 00:47:17,377
- (Sighs) Yeah.
- We'll continue this tomorrow.
595
00:47:24,384 --> 00:47:27,471
What would you say
she was suffering from?
596
00:47:27,929 --> 00:47:31,308
- Self-deception.
- Good. It's a little general.
597
00:47:32,476 --> 00:47:36,355
- I don't think she can part with the lies.
- No? Too bad.
598
00:47:37,939 --> 00:47:42,027
- Not that she doesn't want to.
- It's precisely that she doesn't want to.
599
00:47:42,152 --> 00:47:45,155
When she wants to, she will.
600
00:47:45,280 --> 00:47:48,158
- It's all happening so fast.
- I have to hurry.
601
00:47:48,283 --> 00:47:51,536
I'm trying to prevent her
from killing herself.
602
00:47:52,329 --> 00:47:55,957
- You don't think she would?
- She's already begun.
603
00:47:56,083 --> 00:47:58,627
- She has?
- Oh, not very dramatically.
604
00:47:58,752 --> 00:48:00,420
That's not her style.
605
00:48:00,545 --> 00:48:02,672
She's doing it slowly
and methodically,
606
00:48:02,798 --> 00:48:05,759
and has been
since she was very young.
607
00:48:05,884 --> 00:48:09,012
Now, if you'll pardon me,
I have another patient.
608
00:48:27,364 --> 00:48:29,533
Now that my life is...
609
00:48:30,117 --> 00:48:32,786
drawing to a close,
610
00:48:32,911 --> 00:48:35,414
I have only regrets.
611
00:48:36,415 --> 00:48:40,377
Regrets that the woman
I shared my life with
612
00:48:41,169 --> 00:48:44,214
is not the one
I loved the most deeply.
613
00:48:45,382 --> 00:48:50,971
Regrets that there is no love between
my son and myself. That is my fault.
614
00:48:52,389 --> 00:48:57,060
Regrets that perhaps I've been
too severe with my daughter,
615
00:48:57,936 --> 00:49:03,400
too demanding, that I haven't
given her enough feeling.
616
00:49:05,235 --> 00:49:07,946
But I was so unhappy myself,
617
00:49:08,071 --> 00:49:13,660
so caught up in those
stupid studies of historical figures.
618
00:49:15,579 --> 00:49:20,208
Even though I have achieved
some eminence in my field,
619
00:49:21,251 --> 00:49:24,045
I asked too little of myself.
620
00:49:26,089 --> 00:49:28,341
(Marion) 'Suddenly the dream shifted
621
00:49:28,467 --> 00:49:31,845
'and I found myself on a street
that was familiar.
622
00:49:31,970 --> 00:49:36,683
'It seemed to be where I had run
into Claire, in front of the theatre.'
623
00:49:37,434 --> 00:49:39,436
(♪ VARÈSE: "Ecuatorial")
624
00:49:50,197 --> 00:49:52,949
- What's going on?
- Come on in. It's OK.
625
00:49:54,618 --> 00:49:59,331
Would she like to observe the rehearsal?
Claire is such a good actress.
626
00:49:59,456 --> 00:50:02,292
She plays innumerable roles.
627
00:50:02,417 --> 00:50:05,754
Would you ever think of making love
to me on the living room floor?
628
00:50:05,879 --> 00:50:10,008
- Would you want me to?
- I don't know. Would you want to?
629
00:50:10,509 --> 00:50:13,762
Well, somehow I've never seen you
as the hardwood floor type.
630
00:50:13,887 --> 00:50:17,724
No. That's a pretty insulting thing to say.
631
00:50:18,266 --> 00:50:23,188
It's you that's the type not to make love
anywhere but in bed with the lights out.
632
00:50:23,313 --> 00:50:27,651
- Now who's being insulting?
- I suppose you'll undress and go to bed.
633
00:50:27,776 --> 00:50:30,111
Well, it's 01:00am.
634
00:50:31,321 --> 00:50:36,910
Let's try being honest. There's not much
passion left in this marriage, is there?
635
00:50:37,953 --> 00:50:40,830
- Is there not? I haven't noticed.
- Don't be so aloof.
636
00:50:40,956 --> 00:50:44,626
I'm trying to tell you something.
It's not erotic any more.
637
00:50:44,751 --> 00:50:47,337
- Well, was it ever?
- Was it not?
638
00:50:48,129 --> 00:50:50,257
Marion, I'm tired.
639
00:50:50,382 --> 00:50:54,177
We rarely sleep together any more,
and when we do, it's by the book.
640
00:50:54,302 --> 00:50:58,557
It's the same routine. I know what
you're going to do and in what order.
641
00:50:58,682 --> 00:51:02,143
Yeah, it's true, we are both
creatures of routine.
642
00:51:02,269 --> 00:51:04,729
Now can we go to sleep? It's late.
643
00:51:04,854 --> 00:51:09,192
And could you please try not
to toss and talk in your sleep?
644
00:51:10,068 --> 00:51:15,198
Last night you kept saying "Larry".
I assume you dreamed about Larry Lewis.
645
00:51:15,323 --> 00:51:18,076
(Marion) 'At the mention
of Larry Lewis's name,
646
00:51:18,201 --> 00:51:22,706
'I experienced odd feelings
of melancholy and longing.
647
00:51:23,748 --> 00:51:26,418
'I wanted to weep in the dream,
648
00:51:26,543 --> 00:51:29,379
'but the tears wouldn't come.'
649
00:51:30,171 --> 00:51:34,301
- Are you married?
- Yes. You knew I got married.
650
00:51:36,136 --> 00:51:38,179
Oh, yes.
651
00:51:39,055 --> 00:51:41,016
Yes, I had heard that.
652
00:51:41,141 --> 00:51:44,436
Larry wants us to move back
to New York, but I don't.
653
00:51:44,561 --> 00:51:47,230
We've had such a nice time
in Santa Fe.
654
00:51:48,231 --> 00:51:51,234
- Are you happy?
- I'm happy.
655
00:51:52,110 --> 00:51:56,239
Why don't I leave you two?
I'm sure you have a lot to talk about.
656
00:52:01,202 --> 00:52:04,831
I see your by-line
now and then in magazines.
657
00:52:05,749 --> 00:52:08,126
Did you read my novel?
658
00:52:08,251 --> 00:52:12,631
I have it, but I am embarrassed
to say I haven't read it yet.
659
00:52:12,756 --> 00:52:15,508
You inspired one of the characters.
660
00:52:15,634 --> 00:52:17,677
Oh?
661
00:52:17,802 --> 00:52:23,099
- I hope you weren't too rough on me.
- No. I wrote of you with great love.
662
00:52:25,226 --> 00:52:27,228
Your wife is lovely.
663
00:52:27,354 --> 00:52:30,482
Yes. I met her right after
you said goodbye to me.
664
00:52:30,607 --> 00:52:34,110
Her name's Jennifer.
She's also quite a good writer.
665
00:52:35,779 --> 00:52:38,156
- Do you have any children?
- Yes.
666
00:52:38,615 --> 00:52:40,700
We have a daughter.
667
00:52:40,825 --> 00:52:44,954
It's been the greatest,
most beautiful experience of my life.
668
00:52:55,382 --> 00:52:57,884
Do you ever think of me?
669
00:52:58,009 --> 00:53:01,137
(Larry) Do you ever think of me?
670
00:53:01,262 --> 00:53:03,473
Once in a while.
671
00:53:05,225 --> 00:53:07,894
I hope you're happy with Ken.
672
00:53:08,478 --> 00:53:12,899
I ran into him on the street not too
long ago. He must have told you.
673
00:53:13,024 --> 00:53:16,319
I think of you more than once in a while.
674
00:53:17,028 --> 00:53:21,700
But without regret.
Please, don't tell me you have any regret.
675
00:53:21,825 --> 00:53:26,955
(Claire) Darling, come here for a moment.
I want to show you a beautiful sunset.
676
00:53:27,497 --> 00:53:29,999
Which character
in your novel did I inspire?
677
00:53:30,125 --> 00:53:33,420
Hlenka. I gave you
a beautiful name. Hlenka.
678
00:53:34,337 --> 00:53:36,715
I described our times together.
679
00:53:36,840 --> 00:53:39,342
You'll recognise it.
680
00:53:39,467 --> 00:53:41,928
I have to go now.
681
00:53:42,053 --> 00:53:44,639
My wife needs me.
682
00:53:52,313 --> 00:53:55,233
Marion, please, don't cry.
683
00:53:55,358 --> 00:53:58,236
Although I am glad to hear
our little scene is moving.
684
00:53:58,361 --> 00:54:01,906
- I'd like to go home.
- And you will.
685
00:54:02,031 --> 00:54:06,161
I just thought you might like
to see our second act finale.
686
00:54:06,286 --> 00:54:09,372
Your first husband's suicide scene.
687
00:54:10,248 --> 00:54:12,459
It's touching.
688
00:54:12,584 --> 00:54:14,627
Sam was not a suicide.
689
00:54:14,753 --> 00:54:18,923
How do you know?
It was 15 years after you divorced.
690
00:54:20,341 --> 00:54:24,262
He died in his sleep
from mixing pills and alcohol.
691
00:54:25,013 --> 00:54:27,182
I was at his funeral.
692
00:54:27,307 --> 00:54:30,351
(Jack) Well, you know,
that's always a grey area.
693
00:54:30,477 --> 00:54:32,437
Alone in a hotel room,
694
00:54:32,562 --> 00:54:34,898
depressed...
695
00:54:35,023 --> 00:54:37,734
(Marion) Sam was a wonderful man.
696
00:54:38,777 --> 00:54:41,905
We had such lovely times together.
697
00:54:43,490 --> 00:54:45,867
You taught me so much.
698
00:54:45,992 --> 00:54:48,369
You were a wonderful pupil.
699
00:54:48,495 --> 00:54:51,206
Certainly the most interesting one
in my class.
700
00:54:51,331 --> 00:54:53,833
Still, the age difference...
701
00:54:54,375 --> 00:54:57,796
I shouldn't have seduced you.
Intellectually, that is.
702
00:54:57,921 --> 00:55:00,799
I should have resisted that temptation.
703
00:55:01,257 --> 00:55:05,303
I shouldn't have made you adore me,
but you were such a dazzling pupil,
704
00:55:05,428 --> 00:55:08,139
the temptation was too great.
705
00:55:08,264 --> 00:55:10,892
And so I paid the price.
706
00:55:11,017 --> 00:55:13,603
We both paid the price.
707
00:55:13,728 --> 00:55:18,608
Inevitably there comes a time when
the pupil absorbs all that he or she can.
708
00:55:19,442 --> 00:55:23,404
And what seemed like constant joyous
imparting of knowledge and opinions
709
00:55:23,530 --> 00:55:25,949
becomes suffocation.
710
00:55:26,658 --> 00:55:29,994
Ironically, that's what they wrote
on my death certificate.
711
00:55:30,119 --> 00:55:32,163
"Suffocation."
712
00:55:32,997 --> 00:55:34,999
Oh, Sam.
713
00:55:35,124 --> 00:55:39,671
(Jack) Wait, there's another important
scene between you and Sam.
714
00:55:39,796 --> 00:55:41,840
No.
715
00:55:41,965 --> 00:55:43,967
No more.
716
00:55:47,470 --> 00:55:50,640
(Marion) 'That night we had what was
supposed to be a charming dinner
717
00:55:50,765 --> 00:55:53,643
'with Tom and Eleanor Banks.
Doctor Banks.
718
00:55:54,435 --> 00:55:59,023
'Everyone was full of energy,
and I must've seemed drab in contrast.
719
00:56:00,066 --> 00:56:04,571
'Not only was I tired, but the dream
had put me in a foul mood.'
720
00:56:11,619 --> 00:56:13,496
Tom and Eleanor are funny.
721
00:56:13,621 --> 00:56:17,458
All that carrying-on about ESP
and parapsychology.
722
00:56:17,584 --> 00:56:20,086
You'd think they'd be more sensible.
723
00:56:20,211 --> 00:56:24,465
And then when you put it down
so unequivocally, I thought they'd die.
724
00:56:24,591 --> 00:56:27,093
You were a little cruel,
however correct.
725
00:56:27,218 --> 00:56:32,223
I was so tired, I was in a stinking mood.
And who knows? Maybe they're right.
726
00:56:32,348 --> 00:56:35,894
Maybe there is more to life than meets
the eye. What the hell do I know?
727
00:56:36,019 --> 00:56:41,399
Their beliefs are one step ahead of Ouija
boards. And all that talk about Greece!
728
00:56:41,524 --> 00:56:44,611
You'd think no one had sailed
round the Greek islands before.
729
00:56:44,736 --> 00:56:48,406
If we're so contemptuous of Tom and
Eleanor, why do we go out with them?
730
00:56:48,531 --> 00:56:51,618
It's just when they get
on to certain topics.
731
00:56:51,743 --> 00:56:53,745
Next week it'll be flying saucers!
732
00:56:53,870 --> 00:56:56,581
Why do we have to see people
every night anyway?
733
00:56:56,706 --> 00:56:59,417
We never spend any time alone.
734
00:56:59,542 --> 00:57:02,921
- Well, that's not so.
- Yes, it is so. Every night it's friends.
735
00:57:03,046 --> 00:57:06,424
Yours, mine, people we hardly know.
736
00:57:06,549 --> 00:57:08,426
We've known Tom and Eleanor for years.
737
00:57:08,551 --> 00:57:10,929
- And you don't even enjoy him.
- Of course I do.
738
00:57:11,054 --> 00:57:14,849
You've spoken contemptuously
many times because he's a radiologist,
739
00:57:14,974 --> 00:57:17,435
- which you don't take seriously.
- I'm joking.
740
00:57:17,560 --> 00:57:21,356
No, you're not. You disguise it as joking,
but you're serious.
741
00:57:21,481 --> 00:57:26,611
- You're trying to provoke an argument.
- Why are we afraid to be alone together?
742
00:57:26,736 --> 00:57:30,573
- I didn't think we were.
- Because we've nothing to say any more?
743
00:57:30,698 --> 00:57:31,699
We talk.
744
00:57:31,824 --> 00:57:34,452
Why go out with Mark and Lydia
on our anniversary anyway?
745
00:57:34,577 --> 00:57:37,830
If that's all that's bothering you,
we won't go.
746
00:57:37,956 --> 00:57:42,669
But neither should we drive all the way
to the hotel where we had our first tryst.
747
00:57:42,794 --> 00:57:46,881
Don't do that. Don't make
something romantic sound infantile.
748
00:57:47,006 --> 00:57:50,176
OK, but it's the same level
of maturity as sex on the floor.
749
00:57:50,301 --> 00:57:53,262
We might as well have it on the floor.
We don't have it in bed.
750
00:57:53,388 --> 00:57:57,266
- I don't believe we're discussing this.
- Why've you stopped sleeping with me?
751
00:57:57,392 --> 00:58:00,853
We are simply going through
a less active period, that's all.
752
00:58:00,979 --> 00:58:02,522
It's not uncommon.
753
00:58:02,647 --> 00:58:05,108
Why? I just wanna know why.
754
00:58:06,067 --> 00:58:08,111
Why don't we just go to bed?
755
00:58:08,236 --> 00:58:11,614
There was a time that
we were dying to be together.
756
00:58:13,408 --> 00:58:17,370
Marion, you're still the most
desirable woman I know.
757
00:58:17,495 --> 00:58:21,749
But we won't make love tonight
because there'll be some excuse.
758
00:58:24,752 --> 00:58:29,257
I hadn't realised how much of that
had slipped away until today.
759
00:58:30,008 --> 00:58:34,846
I'm really sorry. If I've done
anything wrong, forgive me.
760
00:58:35,596 --> 00:58:37,432
I accept your condemnation.
761
00:58:47,275 --> 00:58:50,236
(♪ BACH: "Unaccompanied Cello Suite
in D Major")
762
00:58:52,572 --> 00:58:54,782
(Sam) 'You were a wonderful pupil.
763
00:58:54,907 --> 00:59:00,288
'Certainly the most interesting one
in my class. Still, the age difference...'
764
00:59:05,960 --> 00:59:07,336
I love you.
765
00:59:07,962 --> 00:59:10,339
I love you too.
766
00:59:14,135 --> 00:59:16,804
- Happy birthday.
- I told you not to bother.
767
00:59:16,929 --> 00:59:19,891
Oh, I wanted to. Open it.
768
00:59:23,728 --> 00:59:28,441
While you were out I read your paper.
It was quite brilliantly written.
769
00:59:28,566 --> 00:59:33,112
It's your work that's brilliant.
And more important, it's original.
770
00:59:34,572 --> 00:59:37,533
- What is it? From a play or something?
- Yes.
771
00:59:37,658 --> 00:59:41,037
It's an original from
a French production of "La Gioconda".
772
00:59:41,162 --> 00:59:44,207
- I love it.
- I thought you'd like it.
773
00:59:44,332 --> 00:59:47,418
It was all I could afford
from that great store.
774
01:00:08,022 --> 01:00:10,983
(♪ WEILL & BRECHT:
"The Bilbao Song")
775
01:00:12,360 --> 01:00:14,153
(Marion) 'The following morning,
776
01:00:14,278 --> 01:00:17,448
'I realised I'd forgotten
to get an anniversary gift for Ken.
777
01:00:17,573 --> 01:00:21,410
'I thought it would be a simple thing,
but it took surprisingly long.
778
01:00:21,536 --> 01:00:25,123
'The truth was I couldn't really
think of what he might like.
779
01:00:25,248 --> 01:00:29,669
'After window-shopping for an hour or so,
I came across an old antiques store.
780
01:00:29,794 --> 01:00:33,214
'At first I didn't think there'd be
anything special for him there,
781
01:00:33,339 --> 01:00:36,300
'but somehow I was drawn
to look further.
782
01:00:36,425 --> 01:00:41,264
'The place was empty and dusty,
and in the back a radio was playing.
783
01:00:41,889 --> 01:00:46,978
'It was full of odd pieces, and I found
browsing in it quite fascinating.'
784
01:01:08,166 --> 01:01:10,585
(Woman sobbing)
785
01:01:19,260 --> 01:01:22,305
Excuse me. Are you all right?
786
01:01:25,391 --> 01:01:28,102
Thank you. I'm OK.
787
01:01:32,273 --> 01:01:34,483
Can I help you?
788
01:01:36,194 --> 01:01:41,282
I'm sorry. I don't know
why I'm so emotional. I was...
789
01:01:41,407 --> 01:01:43,659
Thank you.
790
01:01:43,784 --> 01:01:48,581
Thank you. I was... I was just
looking at that picture there, and I...
791
01:01:48,706 --> 01:01:51,125
And I just felt so sad.
792
01:01:51,250 --> 01:01:54,003
Oh, but this is a very optimistic work.
793
01:01:54,128 --> 01:01:58,674
You know, I saw the original
of this once. In fact, its title is "Hope".
794
01:01:59,842 --> 01:02:05,056
I think, of all the paintings Klimt did
in that period, this is the most positive.
795
01:02:06,057 --> 01:02:08,100
I'm sorry.
796
01:02:11,270 --> 01:02:13,105
Are you an artist?
797
01:02:13,231 --> 01:02:16,359
Yes. Well, I used to do some painting
when I was younger.
798
01:02:16,484 --> 01:02:19,528
I was absolutely in love
with this whole school.
799
01:02:22,448 --> 01:02:26,869
It's funny. Just this morning I was
thinking about... that I missed painting.
800
01:02:26,994 --> 01:02:30,331
- I'd like to get back into it.
- Really?
801
01:02:34,126 --> 01:02:36,963
I guess we all imagine
what might have been.
802
01:02:38,297 --> 01:02:41,092
But that was a long time ago.
803
01:02:42,343 --> 01:02:44,679
Well, anyway...
804
01:02:47,390 --> 01:02:50,685
- Are you feeling better now?
- Yes, I just wanna get some air.
805
01:02:50,810 --> 01:02:55,147
- What kind of paintings did you do?
- Oh, watercolours, mostly.
806
01:02:57,358 --> 01:02:59,944
(Marion) 'We left the store
and walked along together.
807
01:03:00,069 --> 01:03:02,947
'I wanted to know her better
without seeming pushy.
808
01:03:03,072 --> 01:03:06,951
'We talked about art, and the discussion
seemed to cheer her a little.
809
01:03:07,827 --> 01:03:11,247
'We stopped at a gallery and spent
time marvelling at the pictures,
810
01:03:11,372 --> 01:03:14,500
'and I took a chance
and invited her to lunch.
811
01:03:14,625 --> 01:03:16,836
'I was excited when she accepted.
812
01:03:16,961 --> 01:03:21,048
'She suggested a little out-of-the-way
place that was charming and private.
813
01:03:21,173 --> 01:03:25,469
'We ordered a bottle of wine, although
she hardly touched it, being pregnant.
814
01:03:25,594 --> 01:03:28,264
'The result was that
I wound up drinking most of it,
815
01:03:28,389 --> 01:03:34,270
'and while I really wanted to find out about
her, it was me who did most of the talking.'
816
01:03:34,395 --> 01:03:35,813
Fifty.
817
01:03:37,398 --> 01:03:40,234
I didn't think anything of turning 30.
818
01:03:44,739 --> 01:03:47,450
Everybody said I would.
819
01:03:47,575 --> 01:03:50,661
Then they said I'd be crushed
turning 40.
820
01:03:51,746 --> 01:03:55,541
But they were wrong.
I didn't give it a second's thought.
821
01:03:57,960 --> 01:04:02,131
Then they said that
I'd be traumatised when I hit 50.
822
01:04:04,008 --> 01:04:06,469
And they were right.
823
01:04:08,971 --> 01:04:11,557
I'll tell you the truth.
824
01:04:12,558 --> 01:04:16,312
I don't think I've ever recovered
my balance since turning 50.
825
01:04:16,437 --> 01:04:18,939
Aw, gee, 50's not so old.
826
01:04:19,940 --> 01:04:22,443
No, I know it isn't, but...
827
01:04:23,861 --> 01:04:27,323
you just suddenly look up
and see where you are.
828
01:04:27,448 --> 01:04:30,034
You're in a good spot, aren't you?
829
01:04:32,453 --> 01:04:34,914
Well, I thought I was.
830
01:04:36,957 --> 01:04:40,878
And then there's chances gone by
you can't have back again.
831
01:04:41,003 --> 01:04:43,464
Well, like what?
832
01:04:44,006 --> 01:04:46,050
I don't know.
833
01:04:50,471 --> 01:04:53,307
Maybe it would be nice to have a child.
834
01:04:57,478 --> 01:04:59,814
You really think that?
835
01:05:04,485 --> 01:05:06,320
I do.
836
01:05:07,655 --> 01:05:11,283
I've never said it before, but I do.
837
01:05:13,494 --> 01:05:16,956
(Sam) 'How arrogant!
How self-centred and feelingless!'
838
01:05:17,081 --> 01:05:18,916
I told you I didn't want a baby!
839
01:05:19,041 --> 01:05:21,377
What do you mean,
"you didn't want a baby"?
840
01:05:21,502 --> 01:05:25,506
- It was partly mine.
- Except it's my life that gets derailed.
841
01:05:25,631 --> 01:05:28,342
- I'm just destroyed!
- You go on doing what you want...
842
01:05:28,467 --> 01:05:32,721
- and I have to stop and bring it up.
- But we'd share the responsibility.
843
01:05:32,847 --> 01:05:36,225
- You know it would devolve down to me.
- I wanted this baby!
844
01:05:36,350 --> 01:05:40,438
- I told you, it was not part of my plan.
- But you did it without consulting me.
845
01:05:40,563 --> 01:05:42,606
Consulting you? It's my baby.
846
01:05:42,731 --> 01:05:46,652
Do I have to consult you for every move
I make? It's only your ego that's hurt.
847
01:05:46,777 --> 01:05:49,613
- You said you wanted children.
- I do, but not now.
848
01:05:49,738 --> 01:05:53,200
I don't have the future stretched out
in front of me indefinitely.
849
01:05:53,325 --> 01:05:57,413
It's easy for you to say. You've done
your work. I'm just starting out.
850
01:05:57,538 --> 01:06:00,875
I'm trying to make something of myself!
It's not fair to the child.
851
01:06:01,000 --> 01:06:04,879
But you do it without asking me! Or
giving me a chance to argue you out of it!
852
01:06:05,004 --> 01:06:06,922
I didn't want to be argued out of it.
853
01:06:07,047 --> 01:06:10,759
We've talked this to death!
It was unwanted!
854
01:06:10,885 --> 01:06:14,972
Do you want to bring a child
into this world, really?
855
01:06:15,097 --> 01:06:17,266
You're the one that hates it so much,
856
01:06:17,391 --> 01:06:20,686
forever lecturing me on
the pointlessness of existence.
857
01:06:20,811 --> 01:06:23,856
- I hate you so!
- Let me go! Stop it!
858
01:06:23,981 --> 01:06:27,067
I can't stand this anymore. Let me go!
859
01:06:27,193 --> 01:06:30,196
To be capable
of such a lack of feeling!
860
01:06:30,321 --> 01:06:32,448
Knowing how I felt!
861
01:06:32,573 --> 01:06:34,700
Caring only about how you felt!
862
01:06:34,825 --> 01:06:37,912
Your career. Your life of the mind.
863
01:07:25,751 --> 01:07:29,213
(Woman) I feel...
I feel a little depressed.
864
01:07:31,090 --> 01:07:33,884
I met a really sad woman today.
865
01:07:34,635 --> 01:07:37,179
A woman you'd think
would have everything.
866
01:07:37,304 --> 01:07:40,182
And she doesn't. She has nothing.
867
01:07:40,891 --> 01:07:43,644
And it made me feel frightened.
868
01:07:44,395 --> 01:07:46,355
Because I feel...
869
01:07:46,480 --> 01:07:49,483
I feel if I don't stop myself,
870
01:07:49,608 --> 01:07:54,071
as the years go by,
I'm gonna wind up that way.
871
01:07:56,407 --> 01:07:59,076
She can't allow herself to feel.
872
01:07:59,201 --> 01:08:02,663
So the result is, she's led this...
873
01:08:03,497 --> 01:08:08,502
cold, cerebral life, and
has alienated everyone around her.
874
01:08:10,337 --> 01:08:13,090
Well, you know,
we've talked about this before,
875
01:08:13,215 --> 01:08:17,052
how I... how I only... only
hear and see what I want to.
876
01:08:17,511 --> 01:08:20,723
That's exactly what she does. She...
877
01:08:20,848 --> 01:08:24,560
She's pretended for so long
that everything's fine,
878
01:08:24,685 --> 01:08:28,522
but you can see clearly
how... how lost she is.
879
01:08:31,025 --> 01:08:35,237
She had an abortion years ago,
which she regrets.
880
01:08:35,362 --> 01:08:37,781
She rationalises it in many ways,
881
01:08:37,906 --> 01:08:43,078
but I think the truth is she was afraid
of the feelings she would have for a baby.
882
01:08:44,496 --> 01:08:47,499
And she's a very bright woman,
very accomplished.
883
01:08:48,083 --> 01:08:53,756
But like me, she... Well, you know
emotions have always embarrassed me.
884
01:08:55,257 --> 01:08:58,052
I've run away from men
who I felt threatened me,
885
01:08:58,177 --> 01:09:02,181
because the intensity of their passion
just frightens me.
886
01:09:05,059 --> 01:09:10,064
I guess you can't keep deep feelings
closed out for ever, you know, so...
887
01:09:10,189 --> 01:09:15,569
I just don't want to look up when
I'm her age and find my life is empty.
888
01:09:16,695 --> 01:09:19,740
(♪ WEILL & BRECHT:
"The Bilbao Song")
889
01:09:25,871 --> 01:09:27,873
(Woman) Anyhow,
890
01:09:27,998 --> 01:09:32,127
while we were at lunch,
a very upsetting thing happened.
891
01:09:33,003 --> 01:09:37,758
'In the midst of a conversation,
she noticed her friend Lydia.'
892
01:10:23,137 --> 01:10:25,139
(Ken) Marion?
893
01:10:26,140 --> 01:10:28,475
You're late.
894
01:10:28,600 --> 01:10:31,645
I got you an anniversary present.
895
01:10:31,770 --> 01:10:35,190
I know it's tomorrow,
but why don't you open it now?
896
01:10:40,237 --> 01:10:42,948
I didn't know what to get you.
897
01:10:49,455 --> 01:10:52,332
As I said, I always like an opera.
898
01:10:57,296 --> 01:10:59,047
Happy anniversary.
899
01:11:00,215 --> 01:11:02,885
Come on, let's get dressed.
900
01:11:05,679 --> 01:11:08,265
I'm not going anywhere.
901
01:11:08,390 --> 01:11:10,976
What are you talking about?
902
01:11:14,188 --> 01:11:18,984
I saw you and Lydia in the restaurant
today. You didn't notice me, but...
903
01:11:20,110 --> 01:11:22,696
I watched the two of you.
904
01:11:24,865 --> 01:11:29,036
Afterwards, I went walking for
a few hours to calm myself down.
905
01:11:32,289 --> 01:11:35,375
Actually, if I'd had any perception,
906
01:11:36,668 --> 01:11:39,713
I would've been suspicious
from the start.
907
01:11:40,422 --> 01:11:43,258
Because you and I
committed adultery for months
908
01:11:43,383 --> 01:11:46,053
when you were married to Kathy.
909
01:11:47,137 --> 01:11:50,057
That was a very different situation.
910
01:11:51,099 --> 01:11:53,435
I don't think it was.
911
01:11:59,233 --> 01:12:04,238
I guess it wouldn't mean much
if I said to you that it's passing.
912
01:12:06,740 --> 01:12:08,742
It was never very serious.
913
01:12:10,244 --> 01:12:14,081
And it was, uh, utterly foolish
of Lydia and myself.
914
01:12:16,124 --> 01:12:19,878
I feel sorry for you, Ken,
because, in your way,
915
01:12:20,003 --> 01:12:22,506
you've been as lonely as I have.
916
01:12:26,176 --> 01:12:28,554
Have we been lonely?
917
01:12:31,640 --> 01:12:34,518
At least I've come to recognise it.
918
01:12:39,356 --> 01:12:42,734
(Marion) 'The following days,
I didn't get any work done.
919
01:12:42,860 --> 01:12:46,280
'Mostly I walked the streets
and just thought about my life,
920
01:12:46,405 --> 01:12:48,824
'trying to put everything in order.
921
01:12:48,949 --> 01:12:51,410
'I felt the need to talk
to my brother Paul,
922
01:12:51,535 --> 01:12:55,581
'who had made an important
decision about his life too.'
923
01:12:56,623 --> 01:13:00,210
Strange. Lynn and I go through hell
and we're staying together,
924
01:13:00,335 --> 01:13:03,380
you and Ken never fight
and you're breaking up.
925
01:13:05,007 --> 01:13:08,969
- So will you move out? Or will he?
- Oh, no, I will.
926
01:13:10,178 --> 01:13:12,890
I really do want a clean start.
927
01:13:13,015 --> 01:13:16,435
I wanna do a lot of things differently.
928
01:13:16,560 --> 01:13:20,147
And that does mean between us, too.
929
01:13:21,481 --> 01:13:24,985
I'd like to spend a lot more time
with you and Lynn.
930
01:13:25,527 --> 01:13:28,322
I'd like to get to know everyone.
931
01:13:29,990 --> 01:13:32,492
If that's OK with you.
932
01:13:47,925 --> 01:13:50,886
So was it Dad's fault?
Did he do anything wrong?
933
01:13:51,011 --> 01:13:53,722
Oh, we both did, you know?
934
01:13:53,847 --> 01:13:56,934
I mean, I'm just as much
to blame as anybody.
935
01:13:57,517 --> 01:14:00,395
- Maybe more.
- Well, it's too bad, you know.
936
01:14:01,855 --> 01:14:06,610
I just wanted to make sure that
the shock of it didn't upset you too badly.
937
01:14:06,735 --> 01:14:09,905
Well, I... to tell you the truth,
I'm really...
938
01:14:10,030 --> 01:14:14,368
I'm not shocked, I'm just surprised,
you know? I mean...
939
01:14:15,786 --> 01:14:20,874
If I can be honest, I always felt there was
something between you two that was...
940
01:14:20,999 --> 01:14:26,755
I don't know. Maybe too comfortable,
or... that's not the right word. I don't...
941
01:14:26,880 --> 01:14:29,716
Just something, you know?
942
01:14:31,009 --> 01:14:35,097
Well, I hope that this isn't going
to have any bearing on us.
943
01:14:35,222 --> 01:14:37,516
I really value your friendship.
944
01:14:37,641 --> 01:14:40,060
Yeah, and I value yours.
945
01:14:46,817 --> 01:14:48,568
(Knocking)
946
01:14:51,029 --> 01:14:54,199
- Yes?
- Hello. I'm your next-door neighbour.
947
01:14:54,324 --> 01:14:58,412
And I thought you should know that
through some acoustical oddness
948
01:14:58,537 --> 01:15:01,957
- I can hear all your patients quite clearly.
- Really?
949
01:15:02,082 --> 01:15:04,292
Well, thank you. I'll take care of it.
950
01:15:04,418 --> 01:15:07,587
I've had the problem before.
I know what to do.
951
01:15:07,713 --> 01:15:12,426
By the way, you have a young woman
that you see. The pregnant one?
952
01:15:12,551 --> 01:15:16,179
I wonder if you could tell me
how I could get in touch with her.
953
01:15:16,304 --> 01:15:19,224
Oh, yes.
She's terminated her treatment.
954
01:15:21,018 --> 01:15:24,021
She's gone away.
I don't have any way of reaching her.
955
01:15:24,146 --> 01:15:26,523
I'm afraid I can't say any more.
956
01:15:29,609 --> 01:15:31,570
(Marion) 'I resumed work.
957
01:15:31,695 --> 01:15:35,198
'It went well, and I was undisturbed
by extraneous distractions.
958
01:15:35,323 --> 01:15:38,952
'The writing seemed to flow
and I was full of energy.
959
01:15:39,077 --> 01:15:41,913
'Once on a sunny morning,
I paused for a break,
960
01:15:42,039 --> 01:15:46,918
'and I thought I would look through
Larry Lewis's novel, which I'd never read.
961
01:15:47,044 --> 01:15:49,796
'I was curious about
the character named Hlenka,
962
01:15:49,921 --> 01:15:52,466
'which was rumoured
to have been based on me.
963
01:15:52,591 --> 01:15:55,260
'I opened the book, leafed through,
964
01:15:55,385 --> 01:15:59,139
'and sat down as my eye was caught
by her name.
965
01:16:06,772 --> 01:16:10,192
'''Hlenka and I accidentally ran
into one another one day
966
01:16:10,317 --> 01:16:13,570
'''while we were both
buying tickets to a concert.
967
01:16:13,695 --> 01:16:18,033
'''I knew her because she was
the lover of a man I knew quite well."
968
01:16:18,158 --> 01:16:20,577
'''Recently they had decided to marry.
969
01:16:20,702 --> 01:16:23,246
'''This was a catastrophe
for me personally,
970
01:16:23,371 --> 01:16:26,750
'''because from the first moment
he'd introduced me to her,
971
01:16:26,875 --> 01:16:29,294
'''I was in love with her.
972
01:16:29,419 --> 01:16:32,547
'''I convinced her
to have a drink with me."
973
01:16:32,672 --> 01:16:37,010
'''It was the only time I'd ever been
alone with her since we met.
974
01:16:37,135 --> 01:16:41,389
'''She was lovely, and I spoke
too much and too rapidly,
975
01:16:41,515 --> 01:16:44,476
'''because I was embarrassed
over my feelings toward her,
976
01:16:44,601 --> 01:16:47,521
'''which I felt were painfully obvious.
977
01:16:49,231 --> 01:16:53,735
'''We walked around in Central Park
and talked about lots of things.
978
01:16:53,860 --> 01:16:59,282
'''I told her about a book I was planning
to write, and my wanting to live out west.
979
01:16:59,407 --> 01:17:02,494
'''She spoke enthusiastically
about her upcoming marriage,
980
01:17:02,619 --> 01:17:05,122
'''but I thought it was too enthusiastic,
981
01:17:05,247 --> 01:17:09,459
'''as if she were trying to convince
herself rather than me.
982
01:17:10,335 --> 01:17:12,838
'''Soon it began to rain.
983
01:17:13,380 --> 01:17:17,342
'''We ducked into an underpass
to avoid the cloudburst.
984
01:17:18,051 --> 01:17:20,929
'''I remember thinking
how wonderful she was,
985
01:17:21,054 --> 01:17:24,558
'''and how beautiful she
looked at that moment.
986
01:17:24,683 --> 01:17:30,438
'''And I wanted to tell her so many things,
because my feelings were swirling so.
987
01:17:30,564 --> 01:17:34,568
'''And I think she knew everything,
and that frightened her.
988
01:17:34,693 --> 01:17:39,364
'''And yet some instinct told me that
if I kissed her she would respond.
989
01:17:43,076 --> 01:17:45,871
'''Her kiss was full of desire,
990
01:17:45,996 --> 01:17:50,500
'''and I knew I couldn't share
that feeling with anyone else.
991
01:17:54,004 --> 01:17:58,300
'''And then a wall went up, and
just as quickly I was screened out.
992
01:17:58,425 --> 01:18:03,597
'''But it was too late, because I now knew
that she was capable of intense passion
993
01:18:03,722 --> 01:18:07,434
'''if she would one day
just allow herself to feel."
994
01:18:09,936 --> 01:18:15,442
'I closed the book, and felt a strange
mixture of wistfulness and hope.
995
01:18:16,776 --> 01:18:19,779
'And I wondered if a memory
is something you have
996
01:18:19,905 --> 01:18:22,741
'or something you've lost.
997
01:18:22,866 --> 01:18:27,621
'For the first time in a long time,
I felt at peace.'
81994
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