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1
00:00:04,505 --> 00:00:06,340
Hey, it's your mom. She sounds mad.
2
00:00:07,090 --> 00:00:09,343
Probably Missy. Hello.
3
00:00:09,510 --> 00:00:11,678
I am so upset with your sister.
4
00:00:12,638 --> 00:00:13,805
Missy.
5
00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:15,182
What'd she do now?
6
00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:18,310
-I found condoms in her room!
-What?
7
00:00:18,477 --> 00:00:20,896
It is worse, the box isn't full!
8
00:00:21,063 --> 00:00:22,773
-What's happening?
-Well, did you talk to her?
9
00:00:22,940 --> 00:00:24,107
She is at school.
10
00:00:24,274 --> 00:00:25,734
-Who's the boy?
-What boy?
11
00:00:25,901 --> 00:00:27,778
My mom found condoms in Missy's room.
12
00:00:29,154 --> 00:00:30,113
Yikes.
13
00:00:30,656 --> 00:00:32,199
I don't know who he is.
14
00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:35,869
-Well, what are you gonna do?
-Ground her, kill her, I haven't decided.
15
00:00:36,995 --> 00:00:39,164
How about this, you ground her,
I'll kill him.
16
00:00:39,665 --> 00:00:40,624
Deal.
17
00:00:41,208 --> 00:00:42,334
-Gimme.
-Why?
18
00:00:42,501 --> 00:00:43,460
I think I can help.
19
00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:49,007
Hey, Mary. If you're okay with it,
I can talk to her.
20
00:00:49,174 --> 00:00:50,968
-Why?
-Well, she trusts me.
21
00:00:51,134 --> 00:00:52,553
Maybe I can find out what's going on.
22
00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:56,682
I know what's going on. There's a three
pack of condoms and only two left.
23
00:00:57,933 --> 00:00:59,935
Well, that could mean a lot of things.
24
00:01:00,644 --> 00:01:02,271
-Like?
-Like...
25
00:01:03,730 --> 00:01:05,107
Let me talk to her and get back to you.
26
00:01:05,524 --> 00:01:07,192
Okay. Thanks.
27
00:01:10,237 --> 00:01:11,655
I cannot believe this.
28
00:01:11,822 --> 00:01:13,615
Well, at least she was being careful.
29
00:01:13,782 --> 00:01:15,742
Careful is keeping your pants on.
30
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:19,538
She's a teenager.
It's gonna happen sooner or later.
31
00:01:19,705 --> 00:01:21,707
Yeah. Later. I love later.
32
00:01:22,457 --> 00:01:24,543
And when you talk to her
get the name of this guy.
33
00:01:24,710 --> 00:01:27,379
And where he lives.
And if he's bigger than me.
34
00:01:29,172 --> 00:01:30,757
Okay. One step at a time.
35
00:01:30,924 --> 00:01:34,428
-Where did she even get condoms?
-Drugstore I guess.
36
00:01:35,178 --> 00:01:37,931
Really? I never had the courage to buy 'em
at a drugstore.
37
00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:40,851
Which is why
I had to buy a pregnancy test.
38
00:01:42,561 --> 00:01:43,895
Why was she snooping in my room?
39
00:01:44,730 --> 00:01:47,858
More importantly, you cannot tell her
I gave them to you.
40
00:02:16,303 --> 00:02:17,471
She's gonna kill me.
41
00:02:18,096 --> 00:02:20,515
-Probably.
-What do I do?
42
00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:23,018
Well, she doesn't know you did anything.
43
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,145
She knows there's a condom missing,
44
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:29,358
Right. So I guess that means you...
45
00:02:30,275 --> 00:02:33,779
-Yeah.
-So, how'd it go?
46
00:02:34,196 --> 00:02:35,697
Over so fast I'm not sure it counted.
47
00:02:37,074 --> 00:02:38,825
Yeah, get used to that.
48
00:02:41,203 --> 00:02:42,162
I'm dead.
49
00:02:42,537 --> 00:02:44,247
Well, I think we have two options here:
50
00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:48,960
we come clean and we hope she understands
or we lie our asses off.
51
00:02:49,127 --> 00:02:50,504
That one. Asses.
52
00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:55,175
Okay, I'll tell your mom that
you stole them from the drugstore.
53
00:02:55,342 --> 00:02:57,886
-Why?
-Well, shoplifting. It's a distraction.
54
00:02:58,053 --> 00:03:01,223
-Like pleading guilty to a lesser offense.
-Smart.
55
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:03,350
And you were curious how they worked,
56
00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:06,311
so you took one out
and you put it on a banana.
57
00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:10,148
-A banana?
-A cucumber, a carrot, it doesn't matter.
58
00:03:10,315 --> 00:03:12,567
What matters is you weren't having sex.
59
00:03:12,734 --> 00:03:13,694
Right.
60
00:03:14,319 --> 00:03:16,613
-Thank you.
-I got your back.
61
00:03:17,656 --> 00:03:19,491
Someday I hope I can do this kind of thing
for CeeCee.
62
00:03:19,658 --> 00:03:21,410
What is wrong with you? No!
63
00:03:30,585 --> 00:03:32,212
If you don't need anything else,
I'm gonna head out.
64
00:03:33,088 --> 00:03:34,005
Already?
65
00:03:34,172 --> 00:03:36,842
I work part-time for free.
I leave when I want.
66
00:03:37,509 --> 00:03:40,345
-Hey, can I ask you a personal question?
-Sure.
67
00:03:40,512 --> 00:03:43,682
When Mandy was a teenager,
how did you keep boys away from her?
68
00:03:44,641 --> 00:03:45,851
Your daughter craps in a diaper,
69
00:03:46,017 --> 00:03:48,019
that ought to take care of the boys
for a while.
70
00:03:48,854 --> 00:03:52,733
No. It's my sister. With my dad gone,
she's my responsibility.
71
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:54,693
Yeah, I get that.
72
00:03:55,777 --> 00:03:59,072
Well, when the fellas used to come around
and see Mandy,
73
00:03:59,239 --> 00:04:02,492
I'd shake their hands so hard
I could see tears in their eyes.
74
00:04:03,160 --> 00:04:05,370
I think I missed my window
to scare the boy off.
75
00:04:06,955 --> 00:04:10,584
Well, in that case, I find living in
denial to be an excellent coping strategy.
76
00:04:11,460 --> 00:04:12,627
So stick my head in the sand?
77
00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:14,296
Oh yeah, deep as you can go.
78
00:04:15,297 --> 00:04:17,758
-I don't think I can do that.
-You sure?
79
00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:20,135
Got me through finding out that
my daughter got knocked up
80
00:04:20,302 --> 00:04:22,637
by some dumbass seventeen-year-old.
81
00:04:23,346 --> 00:04:24,681
But now you love me, right?
82
00:04:25,891 --> 00:04:28,101
Shake my hand. Let me show you how much.
83
00:04:31,646 --> 00:04:32,689
You know I don't like gossip,
84
00:04:32,856 --> 00:04:35,901
but there's a nasty rumor going around
about one of our younger parishioners.
85
00:04:36,985 --> 00:04:39,780
Really? Anyone I know?
86
00:04:39,946 --> 00:04:42,574
Actually, yes. Mark Delfino.
87
00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:46,286
The word on the street is
he's selling marijuana cigarettes.
88
00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:49,414
Everybody knows that.
He's a terrible child.
89
00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:51,750
Oh, you're here.
90
00:04:52,918 --> 00:04:55,420
-Hey.
-Hey, Mandy. What brings you by?
91
00:04:55,587 --> 00:04:58,173
She doesn't need a reason
to visit her mother-in-law.
92
00:04:58,340 --> 00:05:02,260
That's nice. How's little CeeCee doing?
I bet she's gabbing up a storm.
93
00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:05,096
Oh yes, she is a real chatterbox.
Okay, bye.
94
00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:09,851
-What have you got?
-It's not as bad as you think.
95
00:05:10,018 --> 00:05:12,854
-There was no sex.
-Oh, thank the Lord.
96
00:05:14,397 --> 00:05:18,318
Wait,
why then was there a condom missing?
97
00:05:19,194 --> 00:05:22,030
Well, you're gonna laugh.
98
00:05:23,114 --> 00:05:27,327
She was curious, so she took one out
and she put it on a banana.
99
00:05:29,079 --> 00:05:30,121
That's what she told you?
100
00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:32,457
Yep.
101
00:05:33,291 --> 00:05:35,502
-And you believed it?
-You don't?
102
00:05:36,211 --> 00:05:39,339
No! That is the stupidest story
I've ever heard!
103
00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:41,925
No, it's a good story.
It's very plausible.
104
00:05:43,218 --> 00:05:46,263
And she stole them from the drugstore.
105
00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:48,390
Well, that part I buy.
106
00:05:50,141 --> 00:05:51,268
What are you gonna do?
107
00:05:52,435 --> 00:05:56,857
I am gonna put the fear of God
into that girl is what I'm gonna do.
108
00:05:57,023 --> 00:05:59,025
Well, what exactly does that entail?
109
00:05:59,192 --> 00:06:03,405
Well, for starters, I'm gonna ground her,
take her door off her bedroom.
110
00:06:03,572 --> 00:06:04,531
That should do it.
111
00:06:04,698 --> 00:06:05,907
And then I'm gonna sit her
in front of the TV
112
00:06:06,074 --> 00:06:08,743
and make her watch videos of childbirth.
113
00:06:08,910 --> 00:06:11,162
Try and find some big-headed babies.
114
00:06:13,582 --> 00:06:15,083
Wow, you've really thought about this.
115
00:06:15,250 --> 00:06:17,669
Every day for sixteen years.
116
00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:25,135
CeeCee's getting cuter by the day.
117
00:06:25,302 --> 00:06:29,514
You know, when she was born, she was bald
and chunky like Jim, but now she's all me.
118
00:06:31,558 --> 00:06:33,560
Hey. Mom, I need the phone.
119
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:35,896
Oh, in a minute.
I'm talking to your Aunt Louise.
120
00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:37,230
Okay, but this is important.
121
00:06:37,397 --> 00:06:38,899
Well, so is this.
122
00:06:39,649 --> 00:06:42,569
It's Amanda. Aunt Louise says hi.
123
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:43,904
Oh, let me talk to her.
124
00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:46,239
Hi, Aunt Louise. Bye, Aunt Louise.
125
00:06:46,406 --> 00:06:47,407
Amanda!
126
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:49,868
Yes, I know, I'm terrible.
I'll be right back.
127
00:06:52,829 --> 00:06:53,788
-Hello?
-Hey.
128
00:06:53,955 --> 00:06:57,167
She didn't believe the banana story,
which is crazy because it's so good.
129
00:06:58,001 --> 00:06:59,836
Melissa Cooper, where are you?
130
00:07:00,003 --> 00:07:00,962
I gotta go.
131
00:07:01,129 --> 00:07:03,381
But she did believe you stole it,
so run with that.
132
00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:11,890
-What was that all about?
-I'd rather not say.
133
00:07:12,057 --> 00:07:13,016
Amanda.
134
00:07:14,100 --> 00:07:15,435
Missy got caught shoplifting.
135
00:07:16,519 --> 00:07:17,479
I believe it.
136
00:07:19,314 --> 00:07:21,524
-Who is the boy?
-There is no boy.
137
00:07:21,691 --> 00:07:23,526
-Was that him on the phone?
-No!
138
00:07:23,693 --> 00:07:26,404
You had better start explaining yourself.
139
00:07:26,571 --> 00:07:28,698
Why? You're just gonna tell me
I'm going to hell.
140
00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:31,368
Well, sex before marriage is a sin.
141
00:07:31,534 --> 00:07:32,827
You did it!
142
00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:36,206
And God punished me
with a disrespectful daughter.
143
00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:38,083
I'm not talking about this.
144
00:07:38,249 --> 00:07:42,128
-But you'll talk to Mandy?
-Yes, she listens and doesn't lecture me.
145
00:07:44,339 --> 00:07:46,549
Did she know about this?
146
00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:50,845
Pass the salt.
147
00:07:52,597 --> 00:07:55,016
Hello? Salt.
148
00:07:56,351 --> 00:07:57,310
Sorry.
149
00:07:58,853 --> 00:08:01,439
-Are you okay?
-Yeah, fine.
150
00:08:02,857 --> 00:08:05,276
Here's some good news.
I may buy a trombone.
151
00:08:06,736 --> 00:08:07,737
How is that good news?
152
00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:11,116
I don't own one, and now I might.
Anyone else lost?
153
00:08:13,868 --> 00:08:14,953
I'll get it.
154
00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:19,332
-Hello?
-She's headed your way and she's pissed.
155
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:20,625
Hang on.
156
00:08:22,544 --> 00:08:23,753
What did you tell her?
157
00:08:24,212 --> 00:08:25,380
I'll get it.
158
00:08:26,089 --> 00:08:27,882
Hey, we're eating dinner. Don't be rude.
159
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:30,760
You're on the phone.
160
00:08:32,554 --> 00:08:35,807
I thought my trombone news
would have made a bigger splash.
161
00:08:37,726 --> 00:08:40,020
Where is your lying wife?
162
00:08:41,563 --> 00:08:43,440
Can you come back later?
We're having dinner.
163
00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:50,655
Mary, I know you're mad.
164
00:08:50,822 --> 00:08:54,701
I am way past mad. I am ticked.
165
00:08:57,162 --> 00:08:58,580
About what?
166
00:08:58,747 --> 00:09:01,791
You don't know about this one
giving your sister condoms?
167
00:09:02,500 --> 00:09:05,336
What? How could you do that?
She's just a kid.
168
00:09:05,503 --> 00:09:06,755
Should we give them some privacy?
169
00:09:06,921 --> 00:09:08,465
-Shut up!
-No!
170
00:09:09,466 --> 00:09:10,717
What were you thinking?
171
00:09:11,134 --> 00:09:14,471
She was thinking that it was her place
to make decisions about my daughter.
172
00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:16,181
Hey, she came to me.
173
00:09:16,639 --> 00:09:17,766
And then you lied about it?
174
00:09:17,932 --> 00:09:21,519
Only because I didn't want to get her
in trouble. Or get me in trouble.
175
00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:25,273
You stay away from Missy.
176
00:09:28,276 --> 00:09:31,488
Wow, I've never seen her so upset.
177
00:09:31,654 --> 00:09:33,406
She ain't the only one.
178
00:09:36,701 --> 00:09:38,119
I'm with Mary on this.
179
00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:50,006
-Are you avoiding me?
-I'm trying.
180
00:09:50,548 --> 00:09:53,927
Okay, listen, Missy was talking to me
about this guy she's seeing.
181
00:09:54,094 --> 00:09:56,721
It was starting to get serious,
so I wanted to make sure she was safe.
182
00:09:56,888 --> 00:09:59,015
Did you try telling her not to do it?
183
00:09:59,641 --> 00:10:01,476
If anybody had told you that,
would it have worked?
184
00:10:01,643 --> 00:10:03,186
That's different. I'm a guy.
185
00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:06,564
So, it was okay for you to have sex
in high school,
186
00:10:06,731 --> 00:10:08,441
but not the girls you were with?
187
00:10:08,983 --> 00:10:10,068
Yes.
188
00:10:11,027 --> 00:10:14,489
And I, for one, was disappointed
in their lack of self-control.
189
00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:17,617
I'm sure they were disappointed too.
190
00:10:18,660 --> 00:10:21,621
This ain't about me.
This is about you keeping secrets.
191
00:10:22,247 --> 00:10:24,290
You honestly want to know about
your sister's sex life?
192
00:10:24,958 --> 00:10:27,210
No, but I need to.
She's my responsibility.
193
00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:29,879
Fine.
194
00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:32,757
She's been seeing this guy
for a while. She really likes him.
195
00:10:32,924 --> 00:10:35,135
They've been fooling around
mostly over the clothes stuff, but-
196
00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:36,803
You're right, I don't want to hear it.
197
00:10:37,804 --> 00:10:41,599
Which is why I was handling it.
She's my responsibility too.
198
00:10:41,766 --> 00:10:43,685
Well, my mom don't see it that way.
199
00:10:43,852 --> 00:10:45,812
Well, then you need
to make her understand.
200
00:10:45,979 --> 00:10:47,814
I ain't taking your side in this.
201
00:10:48,606 --> 00:10:50,316
You have no choice. I'm your wife.
202
00:10:50,984 --> 00:10:52,694
So I don't get to decide the side I'm on?
203
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:55,405
No! The side was decided
and the side is mine.
204
00:10:56,823 --> 00:10:58,908
Well, what about the boy?
Can I at least kick his ass?
205
00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:03,163
-Should my brother have kicked your ass?
-Connor? Please.
206
00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:08,042
Like I had time to beat up every guy
Mandy had sex with.
207
00:11:12,213 --> 00:11:15,383
So just because I'm married,
I'm supposed to tell my mom she's wrong?
208
00:11:15,550 --> 00:11:17,218
You can't go against your mom.
209
00:11:17,385 --> 00:11:18,428
Well, what about my wife?
210
00:11:18,595 --> 00:11:22,182
Dude, you only get one mom.
You can have tons of wives.
211
00:11:23,057 --> 00:11:25,685
-Seriously?
-Fine, two, three tops.
212
00:11:25,852 --> 00:11:27,770
Maybe four.
You started young.
213
00:11:29,189 --> 00:11:31,482
Since you have none wives,
maybe pipe down.
214
00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:34,360
Well, what would you do?
215
00:11:35,403 --> 00:11:36,487
Rule of thumb,
216
00:11:36,654 --> 00:11:39,908
if you have to pick between two women,
always pick the one you sleep with.
217
00:11:40,408 --> 00:11:44,245
You can only sleep with one woman?
I sleep with several.
218
00:11:45,747 --> 00:11:47,498
-No, you don't.
-I could.
219
00:11:48,625 --> 00:11:51,461
So you always side with Mrs. McAllister
over your mom?
220
00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:54,964
-Exactly.
-You know, I've never met your mom.
221
00:11:56,090 --> 00:11:57,383
Exactly.
222
00:11:57,842 --> 00:12:01,304
Well, I'm not cutting out my mother.
I want her and Mandy to get along.
223
00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:03,848
I really could.
224
00:12:07,310 --> 00:12:11,189
I have tried so hard to raise Missy
with good Christian values.
225
00:12:11,356 --> 00:12:15,276
It's not your fault. Kids these days
are faced with all sorts of temptation.
226
00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:16,444
Tell me about it.
227
00:12:16,611 --> 00:12:20,657
Just the other day, I saw a music video
about a man who liked big butts.
228
00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:22,825
Oh, Lord.
229
00:12:22,992 --> 00:12:24,702
He was honest about it,
230
00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:27,538
but it's still very troubling.
231
00:12:27,705 --> 00:12:28,998
And Mandy's not helping,
232
00:12:29,165 --> 00:12:32,126
making Missy think that
this kind of behavior's acceptable.
233
00:12:32,835 --> 00:12:34,837
Well, we'll continue to pray on this.
234
00:12:37,006 --> 00:12:38,132
Thank you for listening.
235
00:12:38,716 --> 00:12:41,594
God didn't give me these
just for holding up sunglasses.
236
00:12:47,934 --> 00:12:51,187
-Hey, Georgie.
-I don't want my mom to know I'm here.
237
00:12:51,354 --> 00:12:52,313
What's going on?
238
00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:53,690
She's mad at Mandy,
239
00:12:53,856 --> 00:12:56,442
I'm caught in the middle,
and I'm hoping you can smooth things out.
240
00:12:56,943 --> 00:12:59,320
-Won't that put me in the middle?
-Yep. So what's the plan?
241
00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:03,741
Well, your mother's unhappy that
Mandy overstepped her bounds.
242
00:13:04,242 --> 00:13:06,577
I didn't ask for a recap,
I asked for a plan.
243
00:13:07,620 --> 00:13:10,498
I suppose I could sit down
with all parties
244
00:13:10,665 --> 00:13:12,166
and open up a line of communication.
245
00:13:12,333 --> 00:13:13,710
Great. Let me know how it goes.
246
00:13:14,836 --> 00:13:16,212
You're one of the parties.
247
00:13:16,379 --> 00:13:17,964
Oh, come on.
248
00:13:18,131 --> 00:13:20,466
Does anyone really think
I'll be helpful here?
249
00:13:21,551 --> 00:13:25,221
You're not putting me in a room with three
angry women, Georgie. You're coming.
250
00:13:32,770 --> 00:13:36,399
First of all, I just want to
thank everyone for being here.
251
00:13:36,566 --> 00:13:40,737
In a family, nothing is more important
than honest and open communica-
252
00:13:40,903 --> 00:13:42,613
Oh, just start.
253
00:13:43,698 --> 00:13:44,991
I'll start. I don't want to be here.
254
00:13:45,700 --> 00:13:48,536
Well, you should have thought about that
before you took your clothes off.
255
00:13:49,078 --> 00:13:51,372
-Please let me leave.
-Suck it up.
256
00:13:53,124 --> 00:13:56,711
You are so lucky your father's not alive,
because this would have killed him.
257
00:13:56,878 --> 00:13:58,880
And you wonder
why she doesn't want to talk to you.
258
00:13:59,047 --> 00:14:00,006
Mandy!
259
00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:02,467
-What? She's making it worse.
-No, you're making it worse.
260
00:14:02,633 --> 00:14:04,469
Georgie, let's keep it civil.
261
00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:06,763
You're right, I should take a walk
around the block and-
262
00:14:06,929 --> 00:14:08,139
Sit!
263
00:14:09,474 --> 00:14:13,644
The reason we're here is not to
rehash the past. What's been done is done.
264
00:14:13,811 --> 00:14:17,065
It's for y'all to find a way forward
as a loving Christian family.
265
00:14:17,231 --> 00:14:20,151
This isn't fair. Georgie had sex
in high school and no one went crazy.
266
00:14:20,318 --> 00:14:21,277
Hey!
267
00:14:21,444 --> 00:14:23,988
I was not happy about that,
but at least he married her.
268
00:14:24,155 --> 00:14:25,490
I wasn't talking about Mandy.
269
00:14:25,656 --> 00:14:26,783
Hey!
270
00:14:27,325 --> 00:14:29,535
How did I go so wrong with my children?
271
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:32,830
Well, if it makes you feel any better,
Sheldon will probably die a virgin.
272
00:14:33,873 --> 00:14:35,708
That is not true.
273
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:39,629
When the time is right, he will find
a wife and have a beautiful family.
274
00:14:39,796 --> 00:14:41,672
Oh, come on, Mom.
275
00:14:42,799 --> 00:14:46,761
Just leave Shelly out of this.
And you stay away from Missy.
276
00:14:46,928 --> 00:14:48,638
It's not her fault, I asked her for help.
277
00:14:48,805 --> 00:14:50,890
Yeah, because she couldn't come to you.
278
00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:53,810
Why? Because I have values
that you think are a joke?
279
00:14:53,976 --> 00:14:57,814
I don't think they're a joke. I think
they're unrealistic. Teenagers have sex.
280
00:14:57,980 --> 00:15:01,234
Excuse me.
Most save themselves for marriage.
281
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,361
-Most?
-Many.
282
00:15:04,195 --> 00:15:07,657
-How many?
-The point is abstinence is cool.
283
00:15:09,534 --> 00:15:12,829
Missy, I hope you understand your mother
is just trying to keep you safe.
284
00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:14,288
So was I.
285
00:15:14,455 --> 00:15:15,790
I'm talking about her soul.
286
00:15:15,957 --> 00:15:17,667
And I'm talking about her
not getting pregnant.
287
00:15:17,834 --> 00:15:20,128
There is only one sure way
to not get pregnant.
288
00:15:20,294 --> 00:15:21,879
Being Sheldon's future wife?
289
00:15:22,422 --> 00:15:25,174
-That's enough out of you!
-Really? You're on Mom's side?
290
00:15:25,842 --> 00:15:28,302
No, I'm, I'm on Mandy's side.
291
00:15:28,469 --> 00:15:29,804
Is that so?
292
00:15:29,971 --> 00:15:31,013
Seriously?
293
00:15:31,180 --> 00:15:35,226
So you're okay with your wife
giving your sister prophylactics?
294
00:15:35,685 --> 00:15:38,980
Yes. Just to be clear, that's what
old people call condoms, right?
295
00:15:40,148 --> 00:15:42,358
-Right.
-Then yeah. I guess I am.
296
00:15:42,525 --> 00:15:43,484
Georgie!
297
00:15:43,651 --> 00:15:46,028
Hey, I don't like the idea of her
doing stuff with boys either.
298
00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:48,448
It's not boys. It's just boy.
299
00:15:48,781 --> 00:15:50,366
-What's his name?
-Nice try.
300
00:15:50,533 --> 00:15:53,244
See, she can't talk to me
'cause I just want to kick this kid's ass.
301
00:15:53,411 --> 00:15:55,121
She can't talk to you
because you're just gonna pray at her.
302
00:15:55,288 --> 00:15:56,622
So, it's good she's got Mandy,
303
00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:59,041
She can always talk to me.
304
00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:00,877
I'm being serious right now.
305
00:16:02,086 --> 00:16:05,506
So if you're gonna be mad at Mandy, then
be mad at me too 'cause we're a team.
306
00:16:05,673 --> 00:16:06,799
Done.
307
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:09,844
-Can I leave now?
-This meeting? Yes.
308
00:16:10,595 --> 00:16:13,473
Your room?
Not for the next twenty years!
309
00:16:18,436 --> 00:16:22,190
I know we may not have solved everything,
but I think we made some progress.
310
00:16:22,607 --> 00:16:24,025
"Abstinence is cool"?
311
00:16:24,192 --> 00:16:25,526
If you'd ever tried it, you'd know.
312
00:16:27,528 --> 00:16:30,114
Mary, that was uncalled for,
313
00:16:30,907 --> 00:16:32,783
but we were all thinking it.
314
00:16:44,795 --> 00:16:45,880
You can't do that here.
315
00:16:46,422 --> 00:16:49,217
-No, it's okay, Officer, we're married.
-Then go home.
316
00:16:50,343 --> 00:16:51,511
Sorry.
317
00:16:51,677 --> 00:16:55,890
He took my side over his mother's tonight,
and I couldn't keep my hands off him.
318
00:16:57,058 --> 00:16:59,393
-You took her side?
-Yes, ma'am.
319
00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:02,772
Then knock yourselves out.
320
00:17:20,164 --> 00:17:22,708
In his defense, he did warn us.
25125
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