All language subtitles for Best.Laid.Plans.1999.1080p.BluRay.x265-RARBG

Radio: I he loves me too I

j' his love is true I

j' why can't he be you? I

j' he never fails I

I to call and tell... I

okay, another.

Charles epker.

Charles.

Charles is a large fellow.

Played football.

- People call him chunky.
- That's right.

He still plays, backup center
in the Canadian league.

All this remember-when,
where-are-they-now shit.

- Mm.
- That was college.

Can we please talk
about something else?

Oh, hey, you know what?
I had a thought.

Shit, no.

Yes. Last night, I was reading

a history of twentieth-century
america in your honor.

- Whose, Manchester's?
- No, big, thick text by...

- Schlesinger. Halberstam.
- I'm not going to remember.

Well, authors' names
don't really matter

in your trade, anyway, do they?

Look, in the English department,
we deal in fiction.

I can tell the little shits
any name I like.

- Your thought?
- Oh, yes, right.

I was reading 1960s,
sexual revolution,

free love, wife swapping.

Sort of like an after-dinner
free-spirit parlor game.

The husbands used to throw
their key chains onto the table,

mix 'em up,

and then the wives
would all pick them up blindly.

Buddies fucking
each other's wives,

et cetera, et cetera.

And think
when our parents were born.

Okay, now think
when we were born.

We could be the offspring
of a key-chain adultery.

Do you get it?
We may not be our fathers' sons.

Oh, it gives me hope, anyway.

Waitress: Some more 7 and 7s.

- Jesus, another round?
- Thank you.

I haven't finished this one yet.

Mmm. Thank you.

To your first month in tropico.

Stay hydrated.

Everybody sucks but us.

Yeah.

Oh, I have a joke for you.

There's this elephant
in thejungle,

and he's got a Thorn
caught in his foot.

Now, this mouse wanders by.

Elephant stops him and says,

"hey, I'll give you anything
if you take the Thorn out..."

- Hi. How'd it go?
- Nick, Nick, I...

- Can you do me a favor?
- Bryce?

Can you come over here?
Yeah, it's me.

I know it's late,
but I need your...

Yeah. No, I was expecting...

- Well, it's me.
- Yeah.

I got a problem over here.
I got a serious...

Okay, can it wait?
'Cause it's after...

Can't wait.
I need a friend to talk to.

Look, I'm in big fucking shit.

- Okay.
- Please. Please, Nick.

- Okay.
- Thanks, buddy.

- Bye.
- Bye.

100 feet!

- Go down!
- Let's go!

- How'd this happen?
- Ah, brush-fire season.

The slightest thing
will spark one of these off.

You want to take a left here

and proceed slowly
up towards the right, all right?

- Drive safe.
- Thanks.

Get behind it! Knock it down!

You've got to move
out of the way.

Hurry. Get it out.

Oh, shit.

- Morning.
- Hey.

Jesus. You look like I feel.

Well, I feel like it too.

You want a beer?
All I've got is domestic shit.

That'll be fine.

Thanks.

These people you're sitting for,
they keep a lovely home.

So you want to tell me
why I'm here?

I got laid tonight.

How wonderful for you.

No. I didn't bring you here
at 2:00 am.

For bragging rights, okay,

'cause if I tell you this,

you got to make sure you're
not going to tell anybody,

that it stays between us,
okay, Nick?

Okay?

The girl that we met at the bar.

- Katie.
- No, Kathy.

Oh, boy. What happened?

You left.

She and I,
we talked for a while.

You know, she bought me a round,

and then she asked
if I wanted to leave,

and so we came here.

So we started making out.
She initiated.

She did this funny thing
with her hand

and she was kissing me and,
like, squeezing my jaw.

Bryce, broad strokes.
Broad strokes.

Sorry. Sorry.

It's like I blinked,
and we were naked.

And then I...

We did it.

Yeah?

Afterwards, she went
to the bathroom couple minutes,

came out, asked if
I had any vitamin c.

What?

Yeah, so I went upstairs,
and I found some,

and I came back down,

and she had called a cab
and said she was going home

and that, when she got there,
she was going to call the police

and file rape charges
against me.

She says I raped her, Nick.

Bryce, is there
any truth to this?

No. I'm sorry, 'cause I haven't
seen you since college,

and suddenly I lay
all this shit on you.

Is there any truth
to what she's saying?

I don't... I don't think so.

You don't think so,
or you know so?

Listen, I was pretty drunk,

and I can't fucking remember
if she tried to stop anything.

But if she said she did...
Are you just hazy on this,

- or were you...
- It's a mix.

I was in and out during the act.
I don't remember.

Well, you don't seem
very drunk right now.

Well, a chick
accusing you of rape

will sober you up
just like that.

Jesus.

I don't know. Maybe...

Maybe she won't
go through with it if she's...

Otherwise, I don't know
what to tell you, Bryce.

Sit tight, for Christ's sake.

Whatever you do,
don't tell anyone about this,

not now, not ever.

What?

Ah, fuck.

Ah, Nick, I really fucked up.

- Bryce.
- No, Nick, can you talk to her,

just tell her
it was an accident?

Oh, fuck.
I hate to lay this shit on you.

Hey. Hey. Hey.

Shh. Calm down, okay?

Hey, the girl is gone.

There's nothing we can do, okay?

- No.
- Come on, Bryce!

No! She's not gone.

She's downstairs.

God, she's downstairs.

This is going to look worse
than it is.

See, after she said
what she said,

after what she was
going to do, I...

See, Nick, I didn't hit her.

All I did was grab her
and drag her...

Where are the lights?

Over on the wall.

What the fuck are you doing?

I... well, I need
to think through...

No, no, no,
not what are you thinking.

What the fuck are you doing?!

How long has she been down here?

I'm not sure,

'cause my sense of time
is all fucked up.

- Guess.
- Um...

I dragged her down,
and I tried to talk to her,

and I called you.
I don't... maybe half an hour.

You didn't touch her after that?

No, Nick, I swear
I didn't touch her.

- Nick...
- No, just hold on. Let me...

But, Nick...

Oh, fuck!

Come on. It's not my place.

God damn it, Bryce.

Look, I'm sorry, Nick.

When she said that she was
going to call the cops,

I tried to stop her
to find out what happened,

and she kept going for the door,
and I just lost it.

Nick, I swear to god
I didn't touch her after that.

Okay. It's okay.

Where'd you get these?

Upstairs. I found 'em
in the parents' bedroom.

- You have the key?
- The key? Why?

- I'm going to take them off.
- Uh-huh, and then what?

And then I'm going
to drive her home.

Can we talk about this first?

Bryce, give me the key.

I know this looks bad,
and I screwed up,

but I don't think I did before
what she said I did,

and I want
to talk about it first.

- What is there to talk about?
- What the hell

is gonna happen to me
if we let her go?

What is going to happen
to you if we don't?

This chick is going
to ruin my life.

She's going to fuck it all up.

- Bryce, give me the key.
- No.

Shh. It's okay.

I'm sorry if that hurt.

It's Kathy, right?

You okay?

All right, look, this is...

Pretty crazy here.

The situation is
not very good, I know.

I'm going to take you
out of here in a minute.

I'm going to drive you home,

but first, I need
to know if you're all right.

I mean, are you injured at all?

Okay, okay, look.
Take a deep breath, okay?

Just breathe in, okay?

Good. Now exhale.

Let it out.

Okay. It's all right.
Okay, you're doing great.

You're a real pro.

Okay, now listen. Are you hurt?

Are you hurt anywhere?

- My lip.
- Yeah, I can see that,

but it's nothing serious.
It's just a little cut.

What I want to know is are...
What about the rest of you?

Are you hurt inside anywhere?

No? Okay, good.

Your friend didn't hurt me.

I don't care what he did before.

I won't tell anybody.

I just want to get out of here.

I just want to go home.

- I just want to go home.
- Lis... listen.

- I just want to go home.
- I know.

- You will be.
- I just want to go home,

and then everything
would be fine.

You will. I promise you.

I promise. I promise you will.

Just hold on.

Hey, professor, come on.

Nick: We'll be back in a minute.

Everything's going
to be fine, okay?

Bryce: You don't believe her,
do you?

'Cause the second she gets home,
she's going to call the cops.

Yeah, she might.

The thing is,
got to let her go now.

- But there's more to this.
- What?! What?! What?!

Look at that.

Okay, now this one.

Bryce: She's 16.

I mean, what 21-year-old

carries around a fake ID
saying she's 16?

The girl downstairs is 16.

16!

And it doesn't matter
if she said no.

It doesn't matter
if she screamed yes

and had a notary public
certify it.

She's underage. It's statutory.

If she presses charges,
I will go to jail.

I guess a second date's
out of the question then.

Do you see? Do you see now?

Do you see how fucked I am?

Right. Statutory cases are
very, very hard to prosecute...

No! The girl is 16.

I had sex with her.
Boom. Conviction.

You know what?
And it's not just jail.

It's my job, my career,
my entire education

shot to blistering fuck!

I mean, can you
imagine explaining

a statutory rape conviction

or even an accusation
to a tenure committee?

Can you?

Bryce, sit down.

You're going to wear tracks
in these people's carpet.

I only wanted to get laid.
Instead, I'm getting fucked.

Nick, I want to let the girl go.

God, I'm raring to get her
the hell out of here,

but the only way I can do that

is if she can guarantee
that she won't tell anyone.

I don't see how she can do that.

You won't take her promise?

Oh, she's shown herself
to be a pillar of truthfulness.

I mean, can't bribe her.

I've got nothing
to offer, and...

Past that,
my thinking just fails me.

I don't think
I could threaten her.

I could.

What?

I already played
the good cop down there,

so maybe if I go down
and pull a reversal...

Scare the shit out of her.

We're fucked.

You're telling me.

Welcome to tropico
recycling company.

Glass goes to bay four.

Plastic to bay 12.
Thank you for your business.

Nick!

Sorry, man. I forgot
about your dad's funeral.

Of all days, Barry.

- I'm really sorry.
- Appreciate it.

Oh, shit.

Man: Is it yours?

- No, my neighbor's.
- He home?

Okay if I say
she was dead on arrival?

- Yeah.
- I'm going to put her down.

Excuse me.

The shot costs $30.

Oh, I'm sorry.

It's the least I can do.

There you go.

Here's 10 back.

Cheap absolution.

I'm sorry.
I'm really running late.

Oh, okay. Go ahead.

I'll just get the info
from her collar.

- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

Shit!

Ah, shit.

Ever feel like the world's
conspiring against you?

My name's Nick, by the way.

Mine's myrtle.

Myrtle.

Really?

- Thank god.
- It's lissa.

I was just trying
to lower your expectations.

- Two ss?
- Yeah. It's short for Melissa.

When I was learning to talk,

I used to pronounce it
"me-lissa,"

as in "me Tarzan."

- Hmm.
- So the story goes.

Thanks for the lift.

A gift from the light of god...

Blessed... the lord...

May the lord lift up
his countenance upon him

and give him peace. Amen.

I mean, I never would have
come back here after college,

but my father got sick,

so I came home
to take care of him.

- Oh, yeah?
- Mm-hmm.

So, anyway, what's your excuse?

I took the equivalency exam
after sophomore year,

left to be an actress.

Actress?

What, "actress?"

Can never be sure if they're
being straight with you.

You can never be sure, anyway.

So the first camera
I got in front of,

this incredibly
imposing machinery,

like, right in my face,

and I just froze.

Claustrophobic, I think.

So it's back to home

and school and the local vet
to make a buck.

- How long have you lived here?
- All my life.

Me too. Lafayette high.

Me too.

So back to school where, s.U.T.?

Mm-hmm, the extension program
studying art.

My dad taught there,
chaired the history department.

Really?

This was before
they put him in the urn.

- Here you go, sweetie.
- Thank you.

- You all done here?
- Mm-hmm. Thanks.

So in effort to avoid
a similar fate,

next week, I will plunder
my father's belongings

for the few items of value.

I will collect my inheritance,

and when all that
is accomplished,

I will quietly,
promptly leave tropico.

Just that easy?

Nick: Well...

It's been nice meeting you.

Sorry we didn't till now.

Thanks for lunch.

Thanks for dinner.

Thanks for the wake.

Oh, god.

Man: J' I've tried so hard
to remember I

- bye.
- Bye.

I what it is that I forgot I

I but I can, but I can believe I

j' will you now? J'

woman: I I've tried,
I've tried, I've tried I

j' cried and kissed good-bye j'

I to something
that we both know I

j' boy, you blow my mind I

both: J' I don't know
how I'm going to j“

j' show you what I feel for you I

j' all I know,
all I know is I j'

j' I want to be with you I

j' all I know, all I know is I j'

j' I got to be with... j'

rumor has it he was
a pretty good teacher.

I think you would have
liked him.

This is what he looked like.

- He's very sexy.
- Really?

Really? Hmm.

Sorry. Sorry.

- Ah, hi, Nick.
- Hi.

- How are you?
- How are you?

- Good to see you.
- Nick.

- Come in.

Sit down. I'm really sorry
about your father.

Nick: Yeah.
I'm going to miss him.

I brought his favorite pen.

I've got news.

St. Vincent's memorial

conducted an autopsy
on your father

and discovered that his liver
was near failure,

a condition which your father
apparently knew of

and failed to list on his
life insurance application,

which constitutes
a deliberate misrepresentation

and invalidates his policy.

Which means what,
that I... that I would...

You don't get
the insurance money.

As a result,
I've had to inform the IRS

of a new compensation schedule

until the sale
of the house is completed.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait. The IRS?

Your father didn't mention

- his back-tax obligation?
- No.

Your father owed $200,000
in back taxes.

Consequently, these assets
are subject to a lien,

so the government
has seized them all.

Well, his estate
should constitute

more than that, right?

After house payments,
your college tuition,

my fees...

What's left over?

Depends on the sale
of the house...

Which the bank
has seized title of.

What do I get?

If it goes for the asking price,

after taxes...

Nothing.

So did everything go okay
with your lawyer?

Huh? You going to get the money?

Yeah, that was fine.

I'm sorry about that.

So you going to give
your notice?

No, I thought I'd stick around
a little longer.

Anyway, if I go,
who's going to get my job?

I don't know.

Hmm. See you later.

You know, you really have to use
a little imagination

when you're looking
at an old house like this.

It's a really nice opportunity.

Fixer-upper,
first-time buyers like yourself,

it's a very good buy.

Why don't we just look upstairs?

Come on in.

"The American empire disbanded."

Your father's?

"History master thesis..."

- Hmm.
- "...By Nick thornberry."

You inherited his passion.

But that's all.

Tropico, the time has come
for you to pitch in...

Your cans, your bottles,

your other recyclables.

Hi. I'm Mitch Bennett,

president, owner, operator
of tropico recycling company,

inviting you all
to come on down and pitch in.

Tropico and recycling,

together, we're on the move.

Once more, please,
with conviction.

And action!

Tropico and recycling,

together, we're on the move.

Good. Cut.

All right, all right. Now...

Talk to the muchachos.

Renaldo, arriba. Arriba.

Renaldo, I want you
to go get Oscar,

get that crane over there,
bring it back over here.

Nick: Things we do
for minimum wage.

So can you help me out?

I'm sorry, guy.

Once the ad runs,
then we'll talk.

Right now, I can't help you.

No, Mitch, I'm not asking
for a loan.

It's money owed
for services rendered.

Hey, listen to me.

It's not possible right now.

Look, I know you're
short at the moment,

but, hey, everybody's short.

- All right. All right. Thanks.
- Take off.

Hey, everyone, I thought
I told you not to laugh there.

What are you doing? Huh?
What's wrong with you?

- Hey, Carlos.
- Carlos.

Well, he's my friend.

Let me talk to him.

I'm telling you, I don't care
how long you've known him.

Radio: I para bailar ia bamba j'

j“ se necesita
una poca de gracia... j'

- Nick.
- Yeah.

- Do you know...
- Dude, if you say my name,

I'm telling you,
you out of this.

Out of what?

Come on. Come on.

Shit. Tell him, yeah.

Nick, are you doing
anything tonight?

J' bamba, bamba j'

- j' bamba, bamba j'
- come on. Come on!

- J“ bamba, bamba j“
- j' para bailar ia bamba j'

j' para bailar ia bamba... j'

Welcome to tropico
recycling company.

Glass goes into bay four.
Plastic to bay 12.

Thanks for your business.

J' ay arriba, ay arriba... j'

okay, the thing is

my friend here,

he works for
a pretty big guy in town.

Why don't you want me
to know your name?

Because if you get busted,

man, how you going
to identify me?

What, "he was a black guy
with curly hair"?

His guy, Nick,

is under serious
police investigation right now.

He thinks he's going
to get busted anytime,

so every night, he moves his
stash from one house to another

so that the cops
can't get a search warrant

in time to snatch him.

Tonight his stash
is at Jimmy's house.

You know, you got to have
pond water for brains, man.

Oh, je... I'm sorry.

I got a sofa at home
smarter than you.

I like saying people's names.

Look, just shut...

Look, man, it's a real easy job.

Barry breaks into my spot

when I'm pulling watchdog duty
alone, right?

He grabs the stuff,

knocks me out
just to make it look good.

You're willing
to take that lump?

For half of $40,000? Yeah.

It's a two-man job, Nick,

except we need a driver, okay?

Jimmy's first choice got
the runs real bad this morning,

so I recommended you.

Jimmy: Now,
the way I'm seeing that,

it's like we give you
a fourth of what we take.

I mean, yourjob's too easy.

I mean, it's really too safe
for anything more than that.

Come on, Nick. As a favor to me.

Jimmy: Look,
it's one night's work, man.

I mean, the only way
you can possibly fuck up

is if you forget
to put gas in the car.

Barry's got two tickets
to the ball game tonight,

and he invited me along.

Are you going to go?

Yeah, guess so.

Come by, though.
I'll be back around 11:00.

Okay.

Nick: You got to eat those now?

It's a nervous habit.

Shh.

Game time.

- Christ, that was easy.
- What, that's it? You got it?

Yeah. Want to drive a little?

Whoa.

Jimmy's going to have
an advil binge tomorrow.

Oh.

You're not too bright,
are you, Barry?

Nope.

- Nick: Hi.
- Hi.

I brought you something.

Really?

What?

So people will stop laughing
at your music collection.

"The space between us"?

What is this?

It's what the kids
are listening to nowadays.

Cool. Thanks.

J' before I
let you down again... I

how was the game?

It was fine.

Want to know what the score was?

I listened
to a sports radio show

so I could lie factually.

J' in your eyes I

you don't have to tell me
where you've been.

I will if you ask.

J“ I wouldn't have
taken everything I

- I'm thinking of moving again.
- J' out on you... I

- where?
- Mm, Peru,

Malta,

Portland, Oregon, I don't know.

I hear it's nice in Portland.

Want to come?

Please?

I they say every man j'

j' goes blind in his heart I

well, when were you
planning on going?

I they say everybody... I

mm, couple weeks.

As soon as you've finished
your masterpiece here.

J' I've got nothing more to say I

I about it I

is that a no?

It's a yes, you tosser.

J' than you would me. I

Hey, Barry, Nick here

30 minutes after you
were supposed to be here,

reminding you that
the future state of our finances

does not excuse us
from our efforts here at work.

Hope you're on your way.

Can I help you?

Get in the car.

Right.

Welcome to tropico
recycling company.

Glass goes to bay four.

Plastic to bay 12.
Thank you for your business.

That's right, nice and easy.

We're just going
for a little drive.

How you doing?

We ain't met.

Know who I am?

I got a couple guesses.

I'm the guy you stole
$40,000 from last night.

Your suspicions correct?

Thought you'd be an older guy.

My profession
don't promote career longevity.

It's a young man's business.

Don't matter how I found out.

I found out.

Don't matter how sorry you feel.

You going to feel sorrier.

Don't matter
how you plan to fix it,

'cause that plan is obsolete.

Freddie, take that shit
off your head.

What for?

Take that shit off your head
and give it to him.

- Blindfold yourself.
- Why?

'Cause I don't know you,

and I don't know who you know.

Have you ever read Adam Smith's
"an inquiry into the nature

and causes
of the wealth of nations"?

In it, the man addresses the two
simple laws of the market.

First law... self-interest.

It is not from the benevolence
of the butcher,

the brewer, the fucking baker
that we expect our dinner,

but from their self-interest.

I don't sell junk
because I feel civic duty.

I do it out of...

Self-interest.

Second law... competition.

Only under the check
of competition

is a man's self-interest
regulated from ruthlessness.

I don't charge a c-note a pop

because I think some other dude
is going to underprice me.

No, I don't overcharge,
because what suppresses me?

- Competition.
- Consequently,

man's motivations of...

- Self-interest.
- Are transmuted by...

- Competition.
- To yield social Harmony.

You, motherfucker, have fucked
with the laws of the market.

You have fucked
with competition.

You have deregulated
the self-interest

of some other
dope-peddling fuck.

You done fucked up Harmony.

You must unfuck it.

This is all simple economics.

Fuck. Come on.

Come on.

Now, Jimmy here has learned
a lot about economics

the last few hours,

keynesian theory, market trends,
all that shit.

Learning the difference
between iaissez-faire,

which is what
I'm doing right now,

and intervention,
which is what I'm about to do.

Oh, we tried to see
your other associate Barry,

but he was not at home.

Neither was most of his clothes.

We surmised he would
not be returning soon,

so we came to see you.

What do you want,
financial reparation?

What do you want?

Motherfucker likes big words.

You hold that thought, though.

Got to see the show first.

You remember Jimmy.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, quit it.

All right, Freddie, cola.

Little carbonation
up the sinuses

will fuck you up good.

Freddie: The drink
that refreshes.

Damn, this is going to hurt.

Now let's deal.

I don't have your stash.

Then I want reparations,

$40,000.

I don't have that either.

Oh, I think you do.

You just being coy.

What was your cut?

- Fouflh.
- 10,000.

You give me 15,
we're all square.

You don't have it by Sunday,

then you take the taste test.

If you run...

This is what your world
will look like.

Hey, Nick, it's Bryce.

Guess who's moving to tropico.

Nick, Barry. Listen.

Jimmy isn't answering his phone.

I think things got fucked up.

I'm taking off for a while
until I get a hold of him.

Ah, call the office,

not here, you son of a bitch.

Things got fucked up with Jimmy?

Yeah, he's some friend
of Barry's,

assistant manager prospect

who's supposed to show up
tomorrow, and the guy's

- a complete flake.
- Nick.

I'm in a doghouse.

I have a thousand.

No, no, no, no, no.

Don't burden yourself
with my fuckups, please.

Hey.

It's only money.

Besides, I've built up

a certain tolerance
for your fuckups.

Maybe I can burden myself
a little.

All right, 1,400.

We could sell your car.

Ah, 3,000, maybe four.

Still 10 grand short.

My only question is
why pay them at all?

It's just buying us the right
to keep living here,

and we're leaving anyway.

I think if I try and run
and they find me,

they're going to hurt me.

Then don't run.

We'll pay them.

Okay.

So five days to raise $10,000.

You know what a champ I am
at asking for money.

No. No, Nick, I told you.

In a month or so,
we'll discuss this.

I can't wait. I need an advance
today, or I'm through.

Look, I appreciate you
taking Barry's shift,

and I'm going to pay you
double time for it,

but that doesn't change
my cash flow.

The next words out of your mouth
are, "yes, Nick,"

or you're locking up tonight.

Don't try to blackmail me, Nick.

Fuck!

Ah, shit.

Nick, this is Bryce again.

I just landed in town,
got a phone number for you,

555-0173.

You know, also I was wondering,

is there a good mechanic
in town?

'Cause my gear shift
just took a crap on me.

Give me a call, babe.

Bryce.

J' there's a new boy
in the neighborhood I

j' I'd like to meet him
if I could I

j' he's got the look
that I dream about I

j' makes the other girls
scream and shout. J“

- hey.
- Hey.

Welcome to tropico.
Duck and cover.

Nick, come here, man. Come here.

God, it's great to see you.

You still got the charger.

Ha! That's terrific.
That's terrific.

You don't see a lot of white
people driving these nowadays,

but, hey, man, good for you.
Good for you.

Come on, let's get out of here.
Let's go.

Jim, we'll talk to you.

Nick: Wow.

Wait till you see inside.

So we have survey questions
to start,

American lit, brit lit,

everything that should be
taught in high school...

Hawthorne, James, Fitzgerald.

Nick: "So we beat on,
boats against the current,

borne back ceaselessly
into the past."

F. Scott, "great gatsby."
It's a book he wrote.

Oh, we don't actually read
anything we teach.

The department chair
gives us cliffsnotes

at the beginning of the semester,

and we just say
whatever's in those.

That's convenient.

Can you shut the door? Thanks.

Tad excessive.

Guy I'm housesitting for,
a tad retentive.

Can you believe this place?

You know, Mr. Beaumont's
a local guy who made good.

He built this house overlooking
tropico to remind everyone.

Visual. Psshew.

Liquid. Keww.

Jesus Christ.

And here we have
the corridor of wonder.

Man likes carpet.

Wait, even on the toilet seat

for those prolonged stays
of leisure.

Oh, and observe
the cabinet of whimsy.

Huh.

Isn't that great?

Oh, that reminds me.

How's your dad?

You still live with him, right?

No, he's dead.

Jesus, I'm sorry.

It's okay.
It was a few months ago.

Weird.

Hey, I've got something
to show you.

It's a stay of execution...

For a union deserter
during the battle of vicksburg,

Mr. Beaumont's
great-great-somebody or other,

but check out the sig.

Honest Abe.

Didn't he ever get tired
of emancipating people?

Well, supposedly the stay
was last-minute.

It was the only paper around.

Anyway, I remember you
used to dabble in history,

so thought I'd give you a show.

You paying him anything
to live here?

That is no on three conditions...

Feed the plants,
keep the place clean,

and don't invite anyone over.

I'm making an exception for you.

Bryce McCarthy, risk taker.

The starting professorial salary
is shit.

I'm really lucky
to have this place.

Well, your parents
have money, right?

Their own mint. Last few years,

they've developed this
financial tough-love philosophy

on their kids,
sort of a benign neglect,

without the benign part.

What, they cut you off?

Yep.

This life of austerity
is killing me.

Lincoln, Lincoln, Lincoln.

Signature goes
for about $75,000.

Any of these look familiar? Eh?

Yeah, this right here,

only these two things
are switched.

- That one?
- Yeah.

That's a rare item there,
trial printing.

Only a few in existence
and worth about...

$200,000.

So the two together would be...

That's a $300,000
stay of execution.

Unfortunately it does you
no good to steal it.

Well, that's speaking
presumptuously.

Yeah, well,
you're asking about it,

and it's not yours.

Why would it do me
no good to steal it?

Most documents like those,
they're registered.

Hence, they're immovable.

Now, even if this one
happens to be unregistered,

you steal it,
owner reports the theft,

well, it's unmovable again.

What if it wasn't
reported stolen?

Why wouldn't it be?

I don't know. What if?

You'd have to wait two months.

After 60 days, no theft report,
you could sell the thing.

Of course, you'd want to muddy

the trail of ownership
leading to you.

That's not so hard
if you have the right fence.

And what would
the right fence take?

- 10%?
- 20.

You want me to check and see
if there's a listing on it?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Look around.

Nick: It's unregistered,

which means it's fair game.

Charlie, the guy
who looked it up for me,

said he'd advance me 15 grand
upon receipt of the stay

and then, once he sold it,
he'd send us the rest.

- You trust him?
- Yeah.

Okay, so the trick
is to steal it from a house

with an elaborate alarm system

and a housesitter who's not
allowed to invite anyone over

without having it reported
stolen for at least two months?

And without getting caught.

So how well do you know Bryce?

If you're asking
can we bring him in on it,

- no, I don't think so.
- You don't trust him?

Our sophomore year in college,

he cheated on a midterm exam.

He got caught, he confessed,

and then he gave up
the other two guys as well.

So we got to steal
the thing outright

and somehow make sure Bryce
doesn't report it.

He's got to believe that he's
going to get in more trouble

- reporting it than not.
- How?

Make him think
he committed a crime.

Murder's the obvious choice.

How do you convince somebody
he's a murderer?

Other crimes...

Arson, burglary, rape.

How do you convince him
that he did that?

What?

Well...

You can make it statutory.

You want me to lay your friend?

No. No, of course I don't.

You fuck him, Nick.

Liss.

And after that,
you know who else you can...

Liss! Come on.

This is Nick.

Leave a message.

Dealer: Ticktock, ticktock.

The mouse ran out the clock,
motherfucker.

God.

Nick.

Oh, my god.

Lissa: Okay.

Okay, |'|| do it.

Oh, liss, I'm sorry.

You fucking bastard.

You know what you did.

You bastard,
you fucking bastard,

you know what you did.

You bastard.

Bryce, it's Nick.

Yeah, how are you?

Good. Good.

Listen, what are you doing
tomorrow night?

No, I got a place.

It's called
the tropico nocturne.

Nocturne.

Wait. Hold on one second.

Hello.

Yeah, this is he.

Uh-huh. I'll have the money
Sunday morning.

Okay, I'll be here.

Say no, and we'll just call
the whole thing off right now.

Once you've given him
reasonable cause for concern...

Get the hell out of there.

Wait for the cab
outside on the street,

not even on the property.

Okay.

Is that all?

I look on down from the bridge I

yeah, think so.

J' there's still fountains j'

j' down there... j'

I won't see you
until tomorrow night,

and I probably won't
come back here afterwards...

But I'll call you
as soon as it's over.

Okay.

If that's what you want, okay.

J“ everybody seems
so far away from me I

Nick...

J' everybody just wants
to be free I

are you going to be okay
with this?

- I look away I - I don't know.

I from the sky I

guess I have to be.
I want to be.

J' it's no different I

j' when you leave them home I

liss.

J' I can't be sensing
truly now I

I I'm just gone I

yeah.

I just gone I

I how could I say good-bye? J'

I how could I say good-bye? J'

Hi. This is me, and I'm here.

Just entertaining
some last-minute reservations.

I thought maybe
you want to stop...

Calling your girlfriend already?

Hey, have her set me up
with a friend.

I could use getting laid.
Hey, bring a friend!

I got a joke for you.

There's this elephant
in thejungle,

and he's got a Thorn
caught in his foot.

Now, this mouse wanders by.

Elephant stops him and says,

"hey, I'll give you anything

if you take the Thorn
out of my foot."

The mouse goes,
"okay, under one condition.

Afterward, I get to fuck you
up the ass."

The elephant nods okay,

and the mouse takes
this Thorn out of his foot,

and the mouse says,
"hey, we had an agreement."

And the elephant goes, "okay."

So the mouse
jumps on top of his back.

He starts giving the elephant
his business, right?

And meanwhile, there's a monkey
up above in the trees.

The monkey looks down,

and he sees this mouse
sodomizing this elephant,

and the monkey's just disgusted,

and he's so upset that he grabs
a coconut from the tree,

he hurls it down at them.

The coconut hits the elephant
in the head,

and the elephant
hollers in pain,

and the mouse says,

"that's right, baby,
take it all."

No. No.

Yes, yes.

I got to go to the bathroom.

Ye of little bladder.

I that you would never do I

- can I settle out my tab?
- No problem.

J' he loves me too... I

get out of here.

- Listen...
- J' why can't he I

- I be you? I - ...I love you.

Why do you think I'm doing this?

Waitress: Thanks, hon.

I know, I know. I have
a terrible drinking problem.

Whiskey doesn't stain, does it?

I don't think so.

Well, it's a hand-me-down,
anyway.

Brooks brothers
handed it down to me.

You want to sit down?

It's only
a college buddy and me.

Sure.

I'm here by myself, anyway.

- I'm Bryce.
- I'm Kathy.

Hi, Kathy.

You're back.
Kathy, this is Nick.

- Is this your seat?
- No, not anymore.

Could I get that jacket
from you? Thanks.

Bryce, I'll see you later.
I'm going to go.

Is everything okay?

Yeah. I'm just
a little preoccupied.

No kidding. It's been discovered

that our friend here
is on a very short leash.

I took care of the tab.

- Will you leave some tip?
- Mm-hmm.

Okay, I'll call you tomorrow.
Nice to meet you, Kathy.

I'm sorry.

Nick, there's nothing
to apologize about.

It's okay. See you, Nick.

See you, buddy.

We're fucked.

You're telling me.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

I never meant this to happen.

I promise you. I promise.

You didn't get the key?

Where is it?

Bryce has it.

The note?

No, the key. I have the note.

No, it's not in your purse.

I didn't put it in my purse.

I have it.

What happened?

He just laid there
for a while afterwards.

This is after you...

What then?

Then I started into my speech,

but he just went
fucking ballistic,

and I tried to go for the door.

He didn't do anything
to you, did he?

He dragged me
down the stairs, Nick.

I know. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

He's just a bad drunk's all.

I must look terrific about now.

No, you wear captivity well.

So where is it, the note?
Where is it?

Really?

You could at least kiss me
when you do that.

Thanks.

That was really sweet.

Lord today. Have you?

Have you thought
about the lord lately?

Have you sat down and...

I'm glad you're here.

I'm glad too.

Doesn't mean we have
to stick around, though.

So what are we going to do?

Well, I have two ideas.

First one... I break that pole,

you slide your arms out,
and we go home.

I like that idea.

Do we get the money?

I don't know.

He's been upstairs

studying your ids
for the past two hours.

Does he know they're both fake?

Not yet.

- What's idea two?
- Bryce: What did she say?!

"My uncle is a fucking lawyer.

He's going to have your ass.

He's going to tear the scrotums
off you cocksuckers. He's..."

Jesus. That's it, Nick.
She's not going to drop it.

What was that one line?

"Both of you are going to rot
in jail the rest of your lives,

going to be mayors
of ass-rape city."

You might want
to lift the lid there.

Jesus, Nick.

Jesus, this shitty little girl.

Work your whole life.
One goddamn night...

Write a doctoral thesis
on middle English, middle...

Middle fucking English
to get fucked

by some prom queen in training.

Shit, I came once.
I can't even remember.

So you don't get tenure.
So what?

Fuck tenure. I'm unhirable.

I can't even get
a janitor's job.

I might as well do what you do.

It's all I ever wanted
to do, Nick, was teach.

It's all I know how to do,
and now I can't

because miss bitch city
downstairs won't let me.

I'm so fucked.

We are.

What?

Aiding and abetting,
Bryce, kidnapping.

You mean she's bringing that
against me too?

Us, Bryce, us.

Wicked fucking bitch. Bitch!

- Here. Come here.
- Wait.

You done?

Nick: Hey.

I screwed it. Sorry.

- She's wacked.
- I know.

There's no way you could reason
with someone like that.

God, I'd like to kill the girl.

Showed up at the bar
alone, right?

Yeah, I think.

Preacher: I want you to give.

Didn't seem like she knew
anybody there,

and nobody, I imagine,
would remember

the two of you
leaving together, right?

Nah, the bartender
saw her kiss me.

- Why? What are you suggesting?
- We'll be right back.

Tropico, the time has come
for you to pitch in...

- Your cans, your bottles,
- Bryce.

Hey, are you in this?

You had the production value
of a bad porn.

- Bryce, prick...
- What?

Why'd you call me?

- Why did I call you?
- Yeah.

I called you
'cause I needed help.

You're a sly one, man.
You're a fucking sly one.

- I'm not trying to be sly.
- No, no, no, no.

- Talk to me. Talk to me.
- I needed your advice.

Then stop fucking
patronizing me!

I know what you're doing!

Tropico and recycling,

- together, we're on the move.
- What?

Now you don't have to search
the world for a perfect gift.

Hand-painted in the tradition
of ancient...

You have been playing me
for the fool all night,

ever since I walked
in that door.

"What are you suggesting, Nick?"

Oh, you are sweet.

If you want to kill her,
then say so,

but don't play games with me.

Kill her?

It's why I got the call.

Give you the nerve.
It's out in the open now.

Don't pussyfoot around.

I... kill her?

Yes, Bryce.

I couldn't do that.

- You couldn't?
- We couldn't.

I can't believe
that you're even saying this.

You mean actually kill her,
take her life?

No, the other sense
of the word "kill."

- What are you doing?
- I'm looking for a pillow.

- What for?
- There.

Have yourself a time.

This is not why I called you.

Why else? You were looking

for an alternative
to letting her go.

What other alternative
did you think I'd suggest?

Consciously or not,
this is what you want.

This is why you called me.

Can we really do this?

Come here.

Sit.

Can we do this?
Yes, I think we can.

No one can associate you
with the girl.

There are no witnesses
to your meeting except me,

and I'm your alibi
for the entire evening.

No, no, no. I mean, can...

Can we really... I mean, she's...

She's a person, I know,
with an actual life,

and we're talking
about ending it.

You're right. That's...

It's pretty horrible.

But remember, we're talking
about three lives here,

hers and both of ours.

I just want to do what's right.

I do too,

and this is a moral issue,

but it's also a practical one,

the greatest good for
the greatest number of people.

It's a tough one, granted.

We save her, we screw us,
and vice versa, but think.

Who's worth saving here?

Who's created this problem?

Someone's going
to get hurt, Bryce.

It's just a question of who.

Anyway...

It's your decision to make.
I'll stand by whatever you say.

Okay.

I guess I'll do it.

No, no, no. I'll do it.

- You sure?
- That's why you called.

What's that?

It's what it looks like.

She gave you that?

It's weird, 'cause I remember
her being really into it,

screaming like a champ.

I must have been doing
something right.

I need the key now, Bryce.

- What?
- Handcuffs.

I'll be back
in a couple minutes.

What now?

You die.

Bryce: Oh, my god.

God.

Oh, sorry.

- You need a hand?
- No, I got her.

Shit, I forgot her purse.

All right, just hang in there
a little longer.

I'll have you out
in two seconds.

I don't know if I
want to go through with this.

It's just a little while longer.
Just hang in there, okay?

Nick, please.

What are you doing?

What do you mean?

No, you're not coming with me.

- Yeah, I am.
- No, you're not.

I don't want you.
I can't use you.

Well, what are you going to do?

There's an incinerator
at the recycling plant.

- I'm going to put her in it.
- Is that safe?

Nobody arrives at work
till 9:00.

Now, get out. Come on, get out.

- What about her car?
- What about it?

Well, if they
report her missing,

then the police will track
the car, and when they find it,

they're going to ask
around the nocturne.

Okay, fine. I'll move it.

- You'll need the keys.
- You have them?

Look, I can't stay here alone.

I just can't stay here.

I need to eat something.

Okay.

I'll drop you off to eat.

Then I'll deal with the girl...

And then I'll deal with her car.

Okay?

Isn't there a minimum
speed limit or something?

J' glowworm, glimmer j'

j' glimmer, lead us
lest too far we wander j'

j' love's sweet voice
is calling yonder j'

j' shine little glow worm,
glimmer, glimmer j“

j' hey there I

I don't get dimmer, dimmer j'

J' light the path below, above I

I and lead us on to love. I

What?

- This song.
- What about it?

It's all about sperm.

No, it's not.

Ah, come on. "Light the path
that leads us on to love."

This little glow worm is like
Rudolph the red-nosed sperm

leading all the other sperm up.
Of course it is.

You know, not everything
in the world

revolves around fucking.

- Just most things.
- Nope, they don't.

They revolve around money

and power and sometimes spite.

You know what?
That's history's view.

Literature's view is
it's all about fucking.

Oh, shit.

Nick, turn around.

- Nick!
- God damn it, Bryce,

- calm the fuck down!
- All right, slow down.

- Slow down. Take it easy.
- Shit, Nick.

- Calm down.
- Turn around.

- Slow down. Slow down.
- Let's go.

All right, we got a car
coming through.

Clear a Lane there.

Hey, I need another 50.
Put her over here.

More pressure, guys.

Stand back there. Stand back.
Keep moving there. Keep moving.

Let's get some irons over here.

Pull around the left there.

Pressure's dropping
on number two.

You guys, over here.
Get that hose straight.

Nick, Nick,
there's a car following us.

Keep it up, Bryce.

Drunk and paranoid
looks good on you.

Shit, I think it's a cop, Nick.
They're going to stop us.

What if they stop us?
What if they check the trunk?

Shut the fuck up!

- See? It's not a cop.
- Nick.

Time's up, motherfucker.

Get out.

Get out of the fucking car.

Bryce: Please, please, please.

Bryce: No, no, no, no, no.

Don't try to hit me.
Don't hit me!

Don't hit me.

Nick: You fuck!

Fucking kill you,
you son of a bitch!

Get him off me, man!

Nick!

What are we going to do now?

They just took the car.

They're going to find her.

Lissa. Lissa. Lissa. Lissa.
Lissa. Lissa. Lissa.

- Nick!
- Lissa. Lissa.

Nick, what are we going to do?

Quiet!

Nick, they're going
to call the police.

Bryce, they're car thieves.

They're not
going to call the police.

Nick, get up.

Come on.

Nick, get up.

Nick.

Nick, what do...

I'll take care of it.
Just go home, okay?

- Just go home.
- But...

Just"

This is Nick. Leave a message.

I'm here. I'm here. I'm here.

Hello?

Freddie:
We got something of yours.

We got two things
of yours, actually.

What do you want me to do?

Stop checking your ass out
in the mirror.

You coming?

Dealer: Boy, you got
a funny idea about chivalry.

When me and my lady go driving,

she always rides
up front with me.

I thought our date was Sunday.

It was. I bumped it up.

Thought you might be getting
a little flighty.

Apparently you been
getting something.

- What the fuck you been up to?
- Where is she?

Don't worry.
We ain't offered her any soda.

150 years ago,

we had a very curious
economic system in this country.

There was a civil war.

Yeah, I read about it.

But before that,
my great-great-great-grandmother

was put up for auction,

set a female record in Georgia,

$800.

Now, given inflation,
with today's dollars,

she was sold for approximately

10 gs and some change.

Is that your asking price?

Mm-hmm. That'll be
a total of $25,000 you owe me.

I can get you 20
in three or four hours,

if you can wait that long.

Freddie'll drive you back.

Your girlfriend
will stay here...

While you go get
your daddy's money.

Wait a minute.

How'd you know about my dad?

Hey. Hey. Hey.

- Hey!
- Hey.

Aw, fuck.

Nick.

It's just, you know...

What did we steal?

Baking flour.

We thought you got
all that money from your dad,

you know, and the house.

What's 20 grand?

I mean, come on.

We didn't expect you
to pull all this shit.

What's your story?

I'm a finance major,

and we all got tuitions to pay.

I'm just his cousin, man.

By marriage.

You fucking...

Hey! Hey! Hey!

Hey, man, calm down, man.

- Get up off of me.
- Calm down, man.

What the hell's wrong
with you, man?

Calm down.

Come on, man.
Let's get him out of here.

Come on, let's go.

Let's go.

What, you never
fucked a friend before?

Jimmy: No hard feelings, man.

Sorry about your car, dude.

You can call the police
if you want,

but, you know, you do that,

we start mentioning
the chick in the trunk.

I take me down I

we'll try and get
your wheels back.

I to where you hide j'

I lay me down I

I lay me down inside... I

Nick: Excuse me.
You know what time it is?

7:30.

We got to be at Charlie's
in two hours.

But, Nick, why?

That was the most fucked-up
night in my pathetic life.

Lissa.

Liss!

Liss!

Wait. Look, I'm sorry.

I'm sorry I put you
through all this.

Don't apologize to me, Nick.

Don't.

That only makes
this whole situation worse.

You were in a hole,
and I did what I needed to do.

But we can still
salvage some of this.

We can still get the money.

The money, Nick?

Bryce has no idea
you're still alive. We could...

What, just fuck him over?

Just fuck him over
for the hell of it?

This was never
about money, Nick.

This was about you being stuck

in the same place
for your whole life.

Shit.

You two together?

I'm not sure.

Nick.

- Jesus, you're here.
- Bryce.

What's going on?
Did you find the car?

What are you doing here?

I was starving. This was
the only place that was open.

I told you to go home.

Yeah, I know, but...

Nick, I don't think
I can handle this.

I've got
this sick feeling inside.

It's like a tightness
in my chest,

and I feel like it's
kind of going to burst.

You killed her, Nick.

Excuse me?

You killed her.
You smothered her.

I mean, she was a person.

Now she's just dead.

Yeah, can I get a cab?

Okay, and I can't handle it.

I mean, I just can't
go through with it.

I got to talk to somebody.

Of course you do.

I'm sorry, Nick. I got...

I'm going to the police.

For me, I have to.

You know something, Bryce?

You're an asshole.

In fact, you've always been
an asshole, even in college.

I think that's why
I never really liked you.

Nick, I'm having
a crisis of conscience here.

There's no need to be rude.

What the fuck is this?

- What the fuck is that...
- Lissa, wait.

What... lissa?

Christ, she's not...

What...

What the fuck is going on?!

Bryce, this is lissa.

She's my girlfriend.

Was my girlfriend.

What happened?
I mean, I thought she was...

She slept with you...

To steal that

to save my life.

And if she leaves me now,

I'm never going to be able
to make it up to her,

and I badly
need to make it up to her.

I never liked you either!

Wow.

Driver: What's it going to be,
in or out?

I thought you were leaving.

I thought I was too.

Then I realized
I didn't have any money.

Let's walk?

Where?

Anywhere, away from here.

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