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Previously on Cuckoo.
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Unprofessional behaviour.
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Using the public forum of the Lawyer of
the Year Award to call your colleague a
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shower of shithouse.
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My partner, ladies and gentlemen.
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I move that we suspend Ken Thompson from
the firm for a period of one month.
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You might as well keep it from your
whole family, you've been suspended from
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work. Chief Ken!
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If you tell Lorna, I won't be your
friend anymore.
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Chief Ken's been suspended from work and
he's been hiding it from Lorna this
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whole time. What? Hey!
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Find somewhere else to spend the night.
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It's an emergency.
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Zealand?
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Oh, you animal!
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Can we please put a lock on that
bathroom door?
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It's on your dad's to-do list.
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Along with being honest to his wife of
25 years.
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They're making Dad sleep at Steve's bar.
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Oh, until he apologises. Also, with your
dad gone, I get the chance to blast a
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few Nazis.
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Dad would love a bit of this.
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No. He gets furious at the historical
inaccuracies.
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World War II was won by strategy law,
not one American with a bayonet.
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Oh, sniper.
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I don't think Dad meant to lie about
being suspended, Mum.
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I think he was just too embarrassed to
tell you.
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Like when he applied for Mastermind.
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But then the handsome prince slayed the
evil dragon and saved all the villagers.
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Phew, that was tense.
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I think we both need a nappy changing
after that one.
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And so the prince and his beautiful
princess lived happily ever after. And
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then... That's the end.
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No. What?
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That can't be the end. What happens
after happily ever after?
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Sid, hey, have you been eating the pages
again?
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Sid? You are such a bad nephew, cousin.
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Dad probably had a better night's sleep
over there anyway.
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Yeah. Dylan was a bit noisy last night,
all that rutting. Mum!
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It's healthy, Rach. It means he likes
her.
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Maybe we'll hear the pitter-patter of
tiny Dylans. Yeah,
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it's funny you should say that,
actually, Mum, because... You're
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pregnant? Shh!
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Dale might hear.
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You're pregnant? You're pregnant! Mum,
stop that!
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He doesn't know.
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Mum, I'm probably not.
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I'm only a couple of weeks late, so... I
know what comes next for the prince and
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princess. I'm so excited to be a dad.
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I'm going to do all the things I could
never do with my dad.
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Like meet him.
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What the... Steve?
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Steve!
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Steve!
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Steve! Steve!
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Steve!
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Here's my little stud muffin.
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So, is she a keeper?
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Well, she's a goer.
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Come on, Dylan, give me a little bit
more information.
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She's not my usual type.
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Do you like her?
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She's all right.
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That's so romantic, love. Mum, I
wouldn't get too excited.
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If you like her, I'm sure I'll like her
too.
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Oh, hi, Lorna.
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Connie. Oh, hi.
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Oh, Dylan, no.
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Have you got back with Zoe?
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Not exactly. Oh, thank God.
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For a minute there, I thought you'd made
a terrible mistake.
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Well, I'm fine.
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I can't complain.
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The weather's getting nice again.
Where's Pepe? Why are you having sex
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with my son? Mum, don't be a knob.
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I know this must be a shock, but we
bumped into each other last night and...
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Lovely to see you, Connie.
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Why are you having sex with my son?
Please, God, you're using contraception.
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Do we need to?
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I'm making tea now.
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Tea. Tea. Goodbye.
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You want some tea?
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I'm not thirsty.
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I'm hungry.
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Which Connie?
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Connie. Connie.
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Your friend Connie?
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Yes. Steve's ex-wife Connie?
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Yes. Connie.
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Dylan's ex-girlfriend's mum Connie?
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Hi, Rach.
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Hi.
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Do you mind?
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No, that's fine.
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Cheers, my love.
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Bye, Rach.
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Fat Connie. Yes, fat Connie.
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But she used to babysit him.
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Let's not judge.
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I mean, she's obviously been through a
rough time, and being married to Steve
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for years is enough to drive anyone
to... Into Dylan's bedroom!
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Oh, Christ.
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I'm even hoovered in there.
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Oh. Hi.
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Hi. Um, don't go in our room, because
there's no surprise in there for you.
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OK.
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50 quid is the sole reward.
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Oh, why didn't they put a bloody door
in? I don't know, Ken.
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Domestic construction is one of two
skills I haven't mastered.
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The other one is wished. Steve, when are
they coming back?
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Well, it's supposed to be next week, but
I'll give them a ring now.
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In the meantime, just try and enjoy
yourself.
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Try and enjoy myself?
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Enjoy what?
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Suffocation? Well, some people say
heightened sensitivity.
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Just call the builders.
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Will do.
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If you get bored, there's a couple of
tinnies left back there, and a newish
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copy of Alter Trader.
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Steve, I'm actually a bit funny about
small spaces.
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Ken, it's quite a big space.
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It is small for me. Ken, I will not
leave your side.
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I'll be your Greyfriars, Bobby.
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Chewbacca to Han Solo.
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In both those cases, the other guy died.
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Let's be Jack and Rose from Titanic.
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Just call the bloody builders!
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Fucking scum.
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Well, I wouldn't know how to even search
for that online.
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Oh, there's a whole subreddit.
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Well, I fucking enjoyed it, whatever it
was.
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I don't know what Zoe was complaining
about.
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Zoe complained about me?
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Oh, not about you.
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Just about sex.
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But Mum knows best.
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Dylan, I know we said this was just
supposed to be a bit of fun.
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It's not working, right?
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Yeah, I beat my record.
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What are you doing?
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Putting a picture on Facebook.
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Chilling with my bae. Hashtag Pino.
Hashtag what am I like?
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Hey, hold on. There. We're official.
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God, that feels liberating.
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Breakfast in bed?
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God, none of my ex-husbands ever brought
me breakfast in bed.
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Well, Steve brought Weetabix once.
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But not to eat.
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Our first like from Zoe.
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Oh, shit!
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I didn't want to get involved, but did
you think things were moving a bit fast?
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I just saw this on Facebook.
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Why did you like it?
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Oh, I like everything my son does on
Facebook.
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Well, ignore it. It's over.
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That was quick.
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So quick that she doesn't even know
about it yet.
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Dylan? Hey, Mum, do you reckon you could
do me a small favour, seeing as she's
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your friend? Could you tell her that
it's over too? I forgot to mention it.
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What? No rush. I won't be back for a
couple of hours.
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Oh, yeah, by the way, she's expecting
breakfast in bed. Cheers, Mum. Bye.
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Dylan, don't you dare. Come back here.
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Luna, is the shower free?
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Yeah, help yourself.
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Thanks.
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I can't believe she actually kicked me
out.
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I mean, all I did was lose my job,
pretend to go to work, and then lie
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about it to my wife's face every day for
the best part of a month.
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Wow. Bitches be crazy.
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They're not bitches, Steve. They're
women.
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But yeah, broadly speaking, some of them
be crazy.
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You wouldn't believe the mind games
Connie used to play.
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Toilet seat down, Steve.
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Plastic sheets for skinning squirrels,
Steve.
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Skinning squirrels? No, you have to skin
them, Ken. Or the fur bungs up the slow
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cooker.
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You are a weird little creature, Steve.
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But it's nice to have someone to talk
to.
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It's really nice to talk to you too,
Ken.
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00:09:24,490 --> 00:09:25,830
I know what you're going to say, Lorne.
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It's a rebound.
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Well, actually, a double rebound.
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Not sure what you call that.
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Return volley?
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Listen, I really shouldn't be the one
telling you this, but can I just say how
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much it means to me that you're OK with
them?
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You're sleeping with my son?
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The last thing I need is any more drama.
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Drama?
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No, no drama.
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I mean, it's not as if you're going to
become my daughter-in-law.
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Is it? I mean, the year I've had,
Lorne... tearing the family apart to run
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off with Pepe, and then as soon as we
get engaged, Pepe gets drafted into the
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Israeli army and he's never allowed to
contact me again.
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00:10:01,230 --> 00:10:05,610
And there comes a time, Lorne, when you
look at your life and you think, am I
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00:10:05,610 --> 00:10:06,610
ever going to be happy again?
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00:10:07,350 --> 00:10:12,390
And then one Tuesday night in Walkabout,
up dances Dylan with a couple of
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00:10:12,390 --> 00:10:16,090
tequilas, and you think, oh, why the
fuck not?
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00:10:17,590 --> 00:10:19,270
I was in such a dark place.
200
00:10:19,670 --> 00:10:23,350
I can honestly say, and this is no
exaggeration, your son.
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00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:24,880
Pulled me back from the brink.
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00:10:26,180 --> 00:10:28,340
I'm rabbiting on. What was it you wanted
to say?
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00:10:29,180 --> 00:10:31,020
Oh, it doesn't matter.
204
00:10:31,420 --> 00:10:32,900
Well, it seemed very urgent a minute
ago.
205
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:34,200
And it's not now.
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00:10:34,960 --> 00:10:36,300
Sometimes I only like that.
207
00:10:36,680 --> 00:10:38,600
Oh, it's a bit out, Lorne.
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00:10:39,340 --> 00:10:45,640
The thing is... Ken's left me.
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00:10:46,860 --> 00:10:47,860
Really?
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00:10:48,380 --> 00:10:50,400
Yes, for an air stewardess.
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00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:52,880
Does a lot of travelling then for his
work?
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00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:54,510
No. He met her in a taxi.
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00:10:55,190 --> 00:10:58,570
He met an air stewardess in a taxi? Yep,
and now he's left me for her.
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The bitch.
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00:11:00,650 --> 00:11:01,650
Oh, Lorna.
216
00:11:02,490 --> 00:11:03,630
Old men are shit.
217
00:11:03,970 --> 00:11:04,970
Yeah.
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00:11:05,310 --> 00:11:06,370
Oh, sod the tea.
219
00:11:06,810 --> 00:11:07,810
Let's open some wine.
220
00:11:08,190 --> 00:11:09,470
Yeah, I think I need some.
221
00:11:12,410 --> 00:11:13,410
Wine!
222
00:11:16,590 --> 00:11:20,210
There you are.
223
00:11:21,010 --> 00:11:22,010
Can't go in there.
224
00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:23,220
The prince hasn't finished yet.
225
00:11:23,460 --> 00:11:24,460
Prince?
226
00:11:25,000 --> 00:11:29,000
Dale, what's going on in there? You
don't worry about that, baby.
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00:11:29,900 --> 00:11:30,900
Can't wait to say that.
228
00:11:31,020 --> 00:11:31,999
Say what?
229
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:33,540
Baby, in that weird way.
230
00:11:33,900 --> 00:11:34,899
They're laughing.
231
00:11:34,900 --> 00:11:36,120
I can't keep it in any longer.
232
00:11:37,640 --> 00:11:42,900
I'm so excited for us. Okay, calm down.
I just want to dance and sing and shout
233
00:11:42,900 --> 00:11:44,780
from the rooftops, Rachel's pregnant!
234
00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:46,420
Rachel's pregnant!
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00:11:58,120 --> 00:11:59,119
I don't know if I can.
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00:11:59,120 --> 00:12:03,200
Rach, all that corny stuff they say in
movies, it's true. I feel like I'm made
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00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:04,200
of clouds.
238
00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:05,319
Well, you're not.
239
00:12:05,320 --> 00:12:09,100
I don't know if I definitely am pregnant
yet. I still haven't done a test. Oh,
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I'll do one right now.
241
00:12:10,540 --> 00:12:11,540
Hey there, little guy.
242
00:12:11,840 --> 00:12:12,840
Give me a high five.
243
00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:15,040
Yep, I felt him.
244
00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:17,660
We're pregnant. Okay, I'm not sure
that's conclusive.
245
00:12:18,060 --> 00:12:19,140
We need to do a real test.
246
00:12:19,500 --> 00:12:20,680
Okay. Come on.
247
00:12:24,340 --> 00:12:27,890
I spy with my little eye something
beginning with... D.
248
00:12:28,230 --> 00:12:30,570
Well, it's not bloody door, is it? So
you concede?
249
00:12:30,830 --> 00:12:34,730
Well, given that I can't see anything
your side of the wall, yes, I concede.
250
00:12:36,070 --> 00:12:38,770
It's a devotion to my best friend, Ken.
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God.
252
00:12:40,870 --> 00:12:42,190
I can't wait to go home.
253
00:12:42,410 --> 00:12:44,370
You're not going home, Ken. Your
marriage has been tattered.
254
00:12:44,730 --> 00:12:46,110
There's nothing wrong with my marriage.
255
00:12:47,090 --> 00:12:49,090
All we need is a weekend away and a B&B.
256
00:12:49,470 --> 00:12:50,730
Maybe a visit to a castle.
257
00:12:50,990 --> 00:12:52,270
That's what I thought with me and
Connie.
258
00:12:52,490 --> 00:12:53,630
But it's a sticking plaster.
259
00:12:54,590 --> 00:12:55,830
First, it's the mini break.
260
00:12:56,460 --> 00:12:59,100
And before you know it, you're knocking
on doors at centre parks asking people
261
00:12:59,100 --> 00:13:00,100
to join in.
262
00:13:01,320 --> 00:13:02,720
Oh, God, that is bleak.
263
00:13:02,980 --> 00:13:04,840
Not as bleak as when we first split up,
Ken.
264
00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:08,300
Some mornings when I drink a whole
bottle of limoncello.
265
00:13:08,580 --> 00:13:10,780
Do you know what I needed most in those
darkest hours?
266
00:13:11,260 --> 00:13:12,219
Packet of Rennies?
267
00:13:12,220 --> 00:13:14,400
Oh, bloody hell. Went through so many
Rennies, Ken.
268
00:13:15,500 --> 00:13:16,500
So many Rennies.
269
00:13:17,660 --> 00:13:20,900
No, I'm talking about companionship.
270
00:13:21,140 --> 00:13:24,080
I don't mean the wishy-washy love of a
treacherous woman. I'm talking about
271
00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:25,080
real male.
272
00:13:25,760 --> 00:13:26,760
BFF.
273
00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:28,360
Companionship.
274
00:13:28,720 --> 00:13:30,840
And you were there for me, Ken. Was I?
275
00:13:31,300 --> 00:13:32,460
I don't think I was.
276
00:13:32,780 --> 00:13:33,780
We don't need women.
277
00:13:34,240 --> 00:13:35,740
We need each other, forever.
278
00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:39,780
I'm putting my hand against the wall,
Ken.
279
00:13:40,620 --> 00:13:44,520
About 1.61 metres from the floor. I
suggest you do the same.
280
00:13:45,420 --> 00:13:46,420
Oh.
281
00:13:48,760 --> 00:13:50,820
Do you know what a best friend would do
for me now?
282
00:13:51,100 --> 00:13:52,100
Sing you a lullaby.
283
00:13:52,200 --> 00:13:53,200
Go and see Lorna.
284
00:13:53,690 --> 00:13:58,150
Go and see Lorna and tell her I'm sorry,
and I'll be back as soon as the bloody
285
00:13:58,150 --> 00:13:59,150
builders arrive.
286
00:14:00,550 --> 00:14:01,550
OK.
287
00:14:01,970 --> 00:14:03,290
Yeah, I'll do that right now, Ken.
288
00:14:04,910 --> 00:14:05,950
I'm just going, Ken.
289
00:14:06,350 --> 00:14:07,970
Speak to Lorna like you asked.
290
00:14:09,250 --> 00:14:12,370
So, er... Bye.
291
00:14:14,730 --> 00:14:17,410
Oh, my God, you are a weird little
goblet.
292
00:14:17,770 --> 00:14:19,630
Which you will come to love. Steve?
293
00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:27,060
You're better off without him anyway,
Lorne.
294
00:14:27,620 --> 00:14:29,380
He always was a funny-looking thing.
295
00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:31,520
What? Ken's bloody gorgeous.
296
00:14:31,900 --> 00:14:33,140
Oh, don't defend him, Lorne.
297
00:14:33,420 --> 00:14:37,560
Not while he's out there stowing his
tray table and putting his seat back in
298
00:14:37,560 --> 00:14:38,560
the upright position.
299
00:14:38,820 --> 00:14:40,760
What? We'd be asked to a day.
300
00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:42,840
Right. Forgot that.
301
00:14:43,620 --> 00:14:44,860
Yeah, screw him.
302
00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:47,060
You could do a lot better, Lorna.
303
00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:49,040
Maybe we should have a date.
304
00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:50,600
Me and Dylan.
305
00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:53,080
You and... Listen, Connie.
306
00:14:53,420 --> 00:14:54,420
Hello, baby.
307
00:14:55,310 --> 00:14:56,310
Where have you been?
308
00:14:56,810 --> 00:15:00,630
Come and dance with me. Yeah, in a
minute. Mum, quick word.
309
00:15:04,590 --> 00:15:05,650
What's she still doing here?
310
00:15:06,290 --> 00:15:07,510
I couldn't do it, Dylan.
311
00:15:07,750 --> 00:15:09,290
You should be dumping your own
girlfriend.
312
00:15:09,590 --> 00:15:10,590
But she's your friend.
313
00:15:10,710 --> 00:15:14,630
Exactly. And I want to keep it that way.
So you better grow a pair and do the
314
00:15:14,630 --> 00:15:17,610
right thing. Because I don't have much
wine left and I am not opening the good
315
00:15:17,610 --> 00:15:20,370
bottles. Well, can't Dad dump her for
me? No, he's left me.
316
00:15:20,570 --> 00:15:21,489
Has he?
317
00:15:21,490 --> 00:15:22,490
No.
318
00:15:22,640 --> 00:15:24,980
Sorry, dearie, I'm getting a bit mixed
up. I've had some wine.
319
00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:28,360
Look, let me teach you how to properly
dump a woman.
320
00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:30,540
First of all, be honest with her.
321
00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:33,720
Woo!
322
00:15:35,660 --> 00:15:38,360
So you mean tell her that she's
absolutely fucking mental?
323
00:15:38,640 --> 00:15:39,640
No, not that.
324
00:15:40,820 --> 00:15:43,220
Look, let me write it down for you.
325
00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:53,240
If it's a boy, we should definitely call
him Ken.
326
00:15:53,680 --> 00:15:56,360
And if it's a girl, Kenneth.
327
00:15:56,700 --> 00:15:59,920
I don't know. I'm thinking something
more Colin Scandi.
328
00:16:00,580 --> 00:16:02,020
What's the name of the woman from the
killing?
329
00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:03,800
Sarah.
330
00:16:04,760 --> 00:16:05,760
No.
331
00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:08,660
God, it's crazy, isn't it?
332
00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:11,520
Just one drop of wee will decide our
entire future.
333
00:16:12,020 --> 00:16:13,780
Well, that's how we got here in the
first place.
334
00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:16,320
You do know it's not wee.
335
00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:25,440
No, that line means it's negative, so
I'm not pregnant.
336
00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:32,120
Are you OK?
337
00:16:34,320 --> 00:16:36,880
Yeah. Yeah, I'm actually kind of
relieved.
338
00:16:37,620 --> 00:16:39,120
Kind of massively relieved.
339
00:16:40,740 --> 00:16:42,380
Oh, it's just hitting me now, actually.
340
00:16:43,020 --> 00:16:47,160
Can you imagine us with a baby? Yeah.
Still living with my parents. No.
341
00:16:47,680 --> 00:16:48,780
Fucking hell, Dale.
342
00:16:49,640 --> 00:16:51,560
I think we've just dodged a massive
bullet here.
343
00:16:51,840 --> 00:16:54,940
Yeah. It's like I've been given a
last-minute pardon from the governor and
344
00:16:54,940 --> 00:16:59,200
he's not going to strap me to a chair
and inject me with motherhood. No, he's
345
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:00,200
not.
346
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:02,800
What are we talking about?
347
00:17:07,319 --> 00:17:10,079
Three, two, one.
348
00:17:12,839 --> 00:17:13,839
Bad news, Ken.
349
00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:14,979
It's over.
350
00:17:14,980 --> 00:17:16,500
What? She's like a woman possessed.
351
00:17:17,210 --> 00:17:20,510
Clothes all over the lawn, your history
book's on fire, screaming that you never
352
00:17:20,510 --> 00:17:22,510
want to see your genetically perfect
arse ever again.
353
00:17:23,190 --> 00:17:25,910
That doesn't sound like Lorna. There was
a man there, too.
354
00:17:26,190 --> 00:17:27,190
A man?
355
00:17:28,069 --> 00:17:29,070
What man?
356
00:17:29,270 --> 00:17:31,830
I can't catch his name. But he was
squeezing her bottom.
357
00:17:32,150 --> 00:17:33,410
What did he look like?
358
00:17:33,650 --> 00:17:35,870
Like Wolf, from Gladiators, but
stronger.
359
00:17:36,910 --> 00:17:38,850
Right, call Lorna. I want to speak to
her now.
360
00:17:39,050 --> 00:17:40,910
No, I think that would just make matters
worse.
361
00:17:41,410 --> 00:17:42,410
Call her!
362
00:17:44,390 --> 00:17:45,390
OK.
363
00:17:48,580 --> 00:17:49,840
Lorna, Steve Chance.
364
00:17:50,660 --> 00:17:51,660
I've got Ken here.
365
00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:53,560
What?
366
00:17:54,820 --> 00:17:56,120
Whoa, slow down.
367
00:17:56,560 --> 00:17:57,680
God, she's angry, Ken.
368
00:17:57,960 --> 00:17:59,640
Tell her I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
369
00:17:59,940 --> 00:18:01,100
Ken says he's sorry.
370
00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:05,440
No,
371
00:18:05,700 --> 00:18:08,520
that's madness, Lorna. What's madness?
What's madness?
372
00:18:08,940 --> 00:18:11,280
Well, you're not going to believe this,
Ken. She's saying you should move in
373
00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:12,280
with me forever.
374
00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:14,100
Right, well, that's not going to happen.
375
00:18:14,340 --> 00:18:15,660
Well, I don't think you've got much
choice, Ken.
376
00:18:17,370 --> 00:18:18,349
What's that, Nona?
377
00:18:18,350 --> 00:18:19,209
Oh, yeah.
378
00:18:19,210 --> 00:18:21,870
She's reminding me I've got a hot tub
which I often fill with stout.
379
00:18:22,090 --> 00:18:23,870
Okay, put her on speakerphone now.
380
00:18:24,210 --> 00:18:26,390
No, no. Put her on speakerphone!
381
00:18:28,610 --> 00:18:29,610
Fuck.
382
00:18:31,010 --> 00:18:32,010
It's over, Ken.
383
00:18:32,210 --> 00:18:33,550
And I'm taking the kit.
384
00:18:34,290 --> 00:18:36,650
I could never love you the way Steve
does.
385
00:18:37,750 --> 00:18:38,970
Don't be hard on yourself.
386
00:18:39,310 --> 00:18:40,310
Nona.
387
00:18:40,970 --> 00:18:41,970
No.
388
00:18:42,650 --> 00:18:43,650
No, it's true.
389
00:18:44,110 --> 00:18:46,550
He would make a much better partner than
I ever would.
390
00:18:47,130 --> 00:18:48,370
I mean sexually.
391
00:18:48,810 --> 00:18:54,170
But if at first it would develop
naturally that way... Sorry,
392
00:18:56,510 --> 00:18:57,850
Ken. I got carried away.
393
00:18:58,210 --> 00:18:59,630
Did you even speak to Lorna?
394
00:18:59,850 --> 00:19:01,470
No. It's not my finest hour.
395
00:19:02,490 --> 00:19:03,670
Did you want to speak to her?
396
00:19:05,070 --> 00:19:06,170
I'm going home.
397
00:19:14,410 --> 00:19:15,410
They'll call you back.
398
00:19:17,450 --> 00:19:18,450
I'm so pleased you understand.
399
00:19:18,970 --> 00:19:22,230
When you think about it, having a baby,
I mean, that is a massive
400
00:19:22,230 --> 00:19:26,170
responsibility. Yeah, you're right. And
I wasn't prepared at all. I mean, all
401
00:19:26,170 --> 00:19:28,350
I've been doing for the past two years
is looking after Sid.
402
00:19:29,050 --> 00:19:35,390
So, how about this for a plan? We go
back to normal, clock up some epic
403
00:19:35,390 --> 00:19:39,150
nights out to use up all our FOMO, and
we'll try for a baby sometime in the
404
00:19:39,150 --> 00:19:41,190
future, you know, when we're both ready.
405
00:19:42,470 --> 00:19:43,470
Agreed.
406
00:19:47,010 --> 00:19:48,390
So, um, tonight?
407
00:19:48,750 --> 00:19:49,750
Oh, tonight.
408
00:19:50,370 --> 00:19:53,110
Sorry. Yeah, yeah, my bad. Epic knife
out first.
409
00:19:53,310 --> 00:19:56,710
I mean, it could be next year or, you
know, a few.
410
00:19:57,010 --> 00:19:58,350
Right, but within five.
411
00:19:58,610 --> 00:20:03,130
Let's just live our lives. You know, be
spontaneous and it'll happen when we're
412
00:20:03,130 --> 00:20:04,130
ready.
413
00:20:04,290 --> 00:20:05,830
Okay. Got it.
414
00:20:06,090 --> 00:20:07,610
I should probably take this down then.
415
00:20:10,690 --> 00:20:11,890
Oh, my God.
416
00:20:12,190 --> 00:20:13,190
Dale.
417
00:20:14,330 --> 00:20:15,590
I am so sorry.
418
00:20:16,430 --> 00:20:18,610
I had no idea you were this ready.
419
00:20:18,830 --> 00:20:19,830
Yeah.
420
00:20:20,930 --> 00:20:22,050
I was not this ready.
421
00:20:23,930 --> 00:20:25,690
And actually, this is a little intense.
422
00:20:26,510 --> 00:20:29,430
And this is my room, and I have to sleep
in here. Where's my bed gone?
423
00:20:29,650 --> 00:20:31,610
Oh, my, this is so beautiful.
424
00:20:33,070 --> 00:20:34,830
Does this mean that... No, I need some
space.
425
00:20:49,830 --> 00:20:53,790
No offense, but your son is a total
shit, just like his father.
426
00:20:54,010 --> 00:20:55,090
Oh, that's a shame.
427
00:20:55,290 --> 00:20:56,290
Did it not work out?
428
00:20:56,690 --> 00:21:01,190
Not only has he just dumped me, but it
was the most pathetic dumping ever.
429
00:21:01,370 --> 00:21:04,450
Pathetic? Don't you mean thoughtful and
sensitive?
430
00:21:04,770 --> 00:21:06,890
No, I bloody don't.
431
00:21:07,190 --> 00:21:09,410
He said he wanted to stay friends.
432
00:21:09,690 --> 00:21:13,750
Well, that's nice, isn't it? What do I
want to be friends with a teenager for?
433
00:21:13,970 --> 00:21:15,390
He's like heaven.
434
00:21:15,810 --> 00:21:18,770
And the worst part of it is he was
reading it all off a little bit of
435
00:21:18,770 --> 00:21:22,340
paper. Right. Well, he wasn't supposed
to actually read it off the paper.
436
00:21:23,500 --> 00:21:24,500
Christ.
437
00:21:25,340 --> 00:21:26,760
Your family is toxic.
438
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:29,700
I don't ever want to see a Thompson man
again.
439
00:21:30,900 --> 00:21:31,900
Connie, wait.
440
00:21:32,820 --> 00:21:35,020
Lorna, I... Connie?
441
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:37,960
Connie?
442
00:21:39,180 --> 00:21:41,520
I've got to get to mine.
443
00:21:41,740 --> 00:21:43,020
Connie? Steve,
444
00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:44,920
Connie.
445
00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:47,600
Steve. Connie.
446
00:21:48,360 --> 00:21:49,960
Why did you have to come back now?
447
00:21:53,380 --> 00:21:54,380
No, no!
448
00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:55,940
Oh, I missed this.
449
00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:57,820
Here, shove this on him.
450
00:21:58,940 --> 00:21:59,940
Oh, God!
451
00:22:00,060 --> 00:22:01,960
Ow! Is it hot?
452
00:22:03,100 --> 00:22:04,700
Why, the slaughter?
453
00:22:05,020 --> 00:22:06,020
Why?
454
00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:11,940
But then, the handsome prince slayed the
evil dragon and saved all the villagers.
455
00:22:12,820 --> 00:22:16,840
And so the prince and his beautiful
princess lived happily ever after.
456
00:22:18,230 --> 00:22:21,690
Well, until the princess had a pregnancy
scare and needed some space.
457
00:22:22,850 --> 00:22:24,010
But don't worry, Sid.
458
00:22:24,630 --> 00:22:27,530
The handsome prince knew exactly what to
do.
459
00:22:33,190 --> 00:22:37,370
And what you should do is head over to
BBC iPlayer and check out their comedy
460
00:22:37,370 --> 00:22:41,530
box set, Problem Solved. And while
you're there...
461
00:22:42,090 --> 00:22:46,590
Check out another great comedy from BBC
Three. We go down under to a private
462
00:22:46,590 --> 00:22:48,550
girls' grammar school in Sydney.
463
00:22:48,750 --> 00:22:50,830
For Jamie, available now.
32363
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