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1
00:00:01,523 --> 00:00:04,526
ADULT ADAM:
Back in the '80s, my mom was
obsessed with my birthday.
2
00:00:04,559 --> 00:00:07,462
She always went over the top.
And over that top.
3
00:00:07,496 --> 00:00:09,364
So as I approached adulthood,
I was hoping
4
00:00:09,398 --> 00:00:11,300
for the biggest
present of them all.
5
00:00:11,333 --> 00:00:13,068
Get excited,
Schmoopaloo.
6
00:00:13,102 --> 00:00:15,337
Your gift is right
behind that garage door.
7
00:00:15,370 --> 00:00:17,939
Ooh! I need to know...
Does it have wheels?
8
00:00:17,972 --> 00:00:20,142
Maybe.
And can it take me
all over town?
9
00:00:20,175 --> 00:00:22,043
Maybe.
And when I pull
up to school,
10
00:00:22,077 --> 00:00:23,978
will the ladies lower
their sunglasses and say,
11
00:00:24,012 --> 00:00:25,780
with surprise,
"Adam Goldberg?"
12
00:00:25,814 --> 00:00:26,881
Definitely!
13
00:00:26,915 --> 00:00:28,483
Ta-da!
14
00:00:28,517 --> 00:00:29,984
A freakin' bike?
15
00:00:30,018 --> 00:00:33,021
Where's my GMC Sierra Grande,
as featured in The Fall Guy?
16
00:00:33,054 --> 00:00:34,689
This is way
better than a car.
17
00:00:34,723 --> 00:00:37,025
ADULT ADAM: Fat chance.
But then I laid eyes
on my mom's
18
00:00:37,058 --> 00:00:38,993
most over-the-top gift ever...
19
00:00:39,027 --> 00:00:41,896
An exact replica
of the bike from
Pee-wee's Big Adventure!
20
00:00:41,930 --> 00:00:43,665
You didn't.
I did.
21
00:00:43,698 --> 00:00:45,834
I'm officially
the greatest mama
in the world!
22
00:00:45,867 --> 00:00:47,035
She really was.
23
00:00:47,068 --> 00:00:49,338
Growing up, I was obsessed
with Pee-wee Herman
24
00:00:49,371 --> 00:00:50,872
and his wacky movie
misadventures
25
00:00:50,905 --> 00:00:53,108
tracking down his beloved
beach cruiser.
26
00:00:53,142 --> 00:00:54,509
Exhibit A!
27
00:00:54,543 --> 00:00:56,678
A photograph of the victims.
28
00:00:56,711 --> 00:00:58,847
My bike and me.
29
00:00:58,880 --> 00:01:01,250
Yep, I could finally
be zany like Pee-wee!
30
00:01:01,283 --> 00:01:02,584
And I owed it all
to my mom!
31
00:01:02,617 --> 00:01:03,818
And there's more.
32
00:01:03,852 --> 00:01:05,587
Oh! Pee-wee's
finely tailored suit!
33
00:01:05,620 --> 00:01:06,688
Oh!
34
00:01:06,721 --> 00:01:08,089
Wagh!
35
00:01:08,123 --> 00:01:09,258
Agh! (CHUCKLES)
36
00:01:09,291 --> 00:01:10,425
Neat bike, Adam!
37
00:01:10,459 --> 00:01:11,560
Thanks, Mrs. K!
38
00:01:11,593 --> 00:01:12,661
Neat lawn!
(BICYCLE BELL RINGS)
39
00:01:12,694 --> 00:01:14,028
Whoa!
Is that Pee-wee's bike?
40
00:01:14,062 --> 00:01:15,096
Sure is, Dave Kim!
41
00:01:15,130 --> 00:01:16,898
Are you rolling
your harp home?
42
00:01:16,931 --> 00:01:18,933
I am!
Your thing is way better!
43
00:01:18,967 --> 00:01:21,770
Sweet ride, Goldnerd.
Can I have it?
44
00:01:21,803 --> 00:01:22,871
Not a chance!
45
00:01:22,904 --> 00:01:24,206
Respect.
You know what?
46
00:01:24,239 --> 00:01:25,440
Sometimes
you're pretty cool.
47
00:01:25,474 --> 00:01:26,775
Yay!
(BICYCLE BELL RINGS)
48
00:01:26,808 --> 00:01:28,477
(CHUCKLES) Oh!
How was she?
49
00:01:28,510 --> 00:01:30,279
I know I say this a lot,
but honestly, this is
50
00:01:30,312 --> 00:01:31,646
the first time
I mean it...
51
00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:33,382
I love you.
I'll take it.
52
00:01:33,415 --> 00:01:36,951
Now scoot your booty up
and take your mama
for a spin!
53
00:01:36,985 --> 00:01:38,620
(GROANS)
54
00:01:38,653 --> 00:01:40,189
* I'm twisted up inside
55
00:01:40,222 --> 00:01:43,892
* But nonetheless,
I feel the need to say
56
00:01:45,994 --> 00:01:47,429
* I don't know the future
57
00:01:47,462 --> 00:01:51,200
* But the past keeps getting
clearer every day *
58
00:01:51,233 --> 00:01:53,268
ADULT ADAM:
It was March 25th,
1980 something,
59
00:01:53,302 --> 00:01:56,238
and Erica had been taking
college seriously all year.
60
00:01:56,271 --> 00:01:58,440
With the exception of the
campus parking regulations.
61
00:01:58,473 --> 00:02:00,309
Are these all
parking tickets?
Yeah, they are.
62
00:02:00,342 --> 00:02:02,344
That's why they're in
the parking ticket drawer.
63
00:02:02,377 --> 00:02:04,813
You've gotten a ticket
in every illegal zone
there is...
64
00:02:04,846 --> 00:02:07,349
Red, yellow, blue.
What's green?
65
00:02:07,382 --> 00:02:08,683
That's for parking on grass.
66
00:02:08,717 --> 00:02:10,652
But what was I supposed to do?
There was no red curb.
67
00:02:10,685 --> 00:02:12,287
You can't park in either!
68
00:02:12,321 --> 00:02:13,622
My betrothed is a scofflaw!
69
00:02:13,655 --> 00:02:15,324
Calm down, Jane Austen.
70
00:02:15,357 --> 00:02:16,925
Campus parking tickets
don't count.
71
00:02:16,958 --> 00:02:18,059
ADULT ADAM:
Turns out, they did.
72
00:02:18,092 --> 00:02:19,828
Oh, no! Your car
has a boot on it!
73
00:02:19,861 --> 00:02:21,430
I can see that, Geoff!
74
00:02:21,463 --> 00:02:23,164
$300 to get a boot off?
75
00:02:23,198 --> 00:02:24,333
That can't be right.
It is.
76
00:02:24,366 --> 00:02:26,435
Your flagrant disregard
for vehicular statutes
77
00:02:26,468 --> 00:02:27,769
has rightly
caught up to you.
78
00:02:27,802 --> 00:02:28,837
Whose side are you on?
79
00:02:28,870 --> 00:02:30,004
Is it wrong to say justice?
80
00:02:30,038 --> 00:02:31,172
What the hell
am I looking at?
81
00:02:31,206 --> 00:02:32,907
Why is there
a metal thingy
on our car?
82
00:02:32,941 --> 00:02:33,975
It's a bummer
for you, dude.
83
00:02:34,008 --> 00:02:35,143
You got a bunch
of parking tickets
84
00:02:35,176 --> 00:02:36,911
and have to pay a steep fine
to get the boot off.
85
00:02:36,945 --> 00:02:38,313
It's quite a lesson.
But keep me posted.
86
00:02:38,347 --> 00:02:40,282
Damn it!
The details are foggy,
87
00:02:40,315 --> 00:02:41,950
but it tracks
with my careless nature.
88
00:02:41,983 --> 00:02:43,452
Do not pawn this off
on Barry.
89
00:02:43,485 --> 00:02:45,687
Erica fought the campus law,
and the campus law won.
90
00:02:45,720 --> 00:02:47,021
Almost like the song!
91
00:02:47,055 --> 00:02:49,123
(RATTLING)
92
00:02:49,157 --> 00:02:50,959
Ugh! The boot people
know what they're doing.
93
00:02:50,992 --> 00:02:53,662
Just relax.
I know how to fix this.
94
00:02:53,695 --> 00:02:55,464
Daddy, I need a new car.
95
00:02:55,497 --> 00:02:56,698
I don't know you.
96
00:02:56,731 --> 00:02:58,199
I'll swear to it
in a court of law.
97
00:02:58,233 --> 00:03:00,935
Fine. But then I need $500
to fix the old one.
98
00:03:00,969 --> 00:03:03,672
$500? What do you think,
I'm Wink Martindale?
99
00:03:03,705 --> 00:03:05,540
Is Wink Martindale
famously rich?
100
00:03:05,574 --> 00:03:08,477
That smiling bastard has
crazy Tic-Tac-Dough money.
101
00:03:08,510 --> 00:03:10,044
Then I guess
if we had to cut corners
102
00:03:10,078 --> 00:03:11,580
and our safety
wasn't important to you...
103
00:03:11,613 --> 00:03:13,382
It's not.
...then we could
fix it for $300.
104
00:03:13,415 --> 00:03:15,684
Damn it, fine!
What's wrong
with it, anyway?
105
00:03:15,717 --> 00:03:17,719
Oh, pfft, you know,
just the usual
106
00:03:17,752 --> 00:03:19,688
"I got too many parking
tickets and I got a boot put
on, and it's no big deal."
107
00:03:19,721 --> 00:03:21,556
A boot?
You heard that?
108
00:03:21,590 --> 00:03:23,358
You typically don't listen
to a word I say.
109
00:03:23,392 --> 00:03:25,126
When it comes to money,
I hear everything.
110
00:03:25,159 --> 00:03:27,429
I am not saving you
from that boot.
111
00:03:27,462 --> 00:03:29,230
You're gonna work it off
here in the store.
112
00:03:29,264 --> 00:03:31,700
Here? Blech!
Nobody really
works here, right?
113
00:03:31,733 --> 00:03:33,368
You do.
Starting now!
114
00:03:33,402 --> 00:03:36,237
ADULT ADAM:
So Erica had no choice
but to take the job.
115
00:03:36,271 --> 00:03:38,440
And turns out,
she was kind of a natural.
116
00:03:38,473 --> 00:03:41,343
The customers liked her
and liked buying from her
even more.
117
00:03:41,376 --> 00:03:43,312
She sold recliners,
sofa beds,
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00:03:43,345 --> 00:03:44,713
really anywhere
you could put your butt.
119
00:03:44,746 --> 00:03:47,081
Yep, she racked up the sales.
120
00:03:47,115 --> 00:03:49,451
She even sold stuff
no one knew the name of.
121
00:03:49,484 --> 00:03:51,886
What in the world
is a davenport?
122
00:03:51,920 --> 00:03:53,455
Oh, that's just
a fancy name
for a couch.
123
00:03:53,488 --> 00:03:54,589
But now
we can charge double.
124
00:03:54,623 --> 00:03:56,858
My little peanut
is a selling machine.
125
00:03:56,891 --> 00:03:57,926
What's your secret?
126
00:03:57,959 --> 00:04:00,529
Oh, I'm using a tried and true
sales technique...
127
00:04:00,562 --> 00:04:01,696
Being helpful.
128
00:04:01,730 --> 00:04:03,565
Hoo hoo!
Who would've thunk?
129
00:04:03,598 --> 00:04:05,534
Hey, this is for you.
You've earned it.
130
00:04:05,567 --> 00:04:06,735
Nine dollars?
131
00:04:06,768 --> 00:04:09,037
Three dollars an hour
for three hours.
Nine dollars.
132
00:04:09,070 --> 00:04:10,939
But it'll take me forever
to get that boot off.
133
00:04:10,972 --> 00:04:12,641
Also take these.
Keys? (SIGHS)
134
00:04:12,674 --> 00:04:14,643
Please say they're to a safe
with more money in it.
135
00:04:14,676 --> 00:04:15,744
No, they're
for the store.
136
00:04:15,777 --> 00:04:18,046
You did good work today.
I'm proud of you.
137
00:04:18,079 --> 00:04:20,982
Huh. Keys.
I've never gotten keys.
138
00:04:21,015 --> 00:04:23,184
When your
family's on vacation,
we just stay closed.
139
00:04:23,217 --> 00:04:24,753
Way to go, Erica!
140
00:04:24,786 --> 00:04:27,255
ADULT ADAM:
While my dad was teaching
Erica the value of a dollar,
141
00:04:27,288 --> 00:04:30,058
I was starting to realize
the real value of my bike.
142
00:04:30,091 --> 00:04:31,626
Look at this!
143
00:04:31,660 --> 00:04:33,528
Someone loves his new bike,
144
00:04:33,562 --> 00:04:35,797
and he loves the person
that gave it to him even more.
145
00:04:35,830 --> 00:04:37,599
That's your takeaway
from the boy
146
00:04:37,632 --> 00:04:39,734
rubbing the thing up
with a shammy?
147
00:04:39,768 --> 00:04:41,403
Oh, this is no shammy.
148
00:04:41,436 --> 00:04:43,237
This is a microfiber
cleaning cloth.
149
00:04:43,271 --> 00:04:44,939
It restores
a bike's natural luster
150
00:04:44,973 --> 00:04:48,377
without causing
what we in the paint game
call "impact crackle."
151
00:04:48,410 --> 00:04:50,445
What are you talking about?
I think he's cleaning it.
152
00:04:50,479 --> 00:04:52,146
Well, now that
it's all sparkly,
153
00:04:52,180 --> 00:04:54,416
why don't take it back out,
jump some puddles?
154
00:04:54,449 --> 00:04:56,250
Puddles?
No, no, no, no, no.
155
00:04:56,284 --> 00:04:58,820
It was a huge mistake
to ride it. Never again.
156
00:04:58,853 --> 00:05:00,121
Never again?
157
00:05:00,154 --> 00:05:03,758
But I saw your face,
you've never looked happier.
158
00:05:03,792 --> 00:05:05,827
But I wasn't considering
the harmful elements.
159
00:05:05,860 --> 00:05:08,963
We're talking fire,
water, earth.
160
00:05:08,997 --> 00:05:11,299
Not to mention
the deadliest
of all... Air.
161
00:05:11,332 --> 00:05:12,867
You're worried about air?
162
00:05:12,901 --> 00:05:17,439
Dust, smoke, dirt,
soot, unknown
particulates, pollen...
163
00:05:17,472 --> 00:05:19,574
That one's had a target
on my back for a while.
164
00:05:19,608 --> 00:05:20,975
But it's fun.
(BICYCLE BELL RINGS)
165
00:05:21,009 --> 00:05:22,043
(GASPS) Careful!
166
00:05:22,076 --> 00:05:24,679
The glands in your fingers
secrete harmful oils!
167
00:05:24,713 --> 00:05:25,847
Adam, it's a bike.
168
00:05:25,880 --> 00:05:27,916
I think you're being
a tad overprotective.
169
00:05:29,183 --> 00:05:30,485
The hell's that?
170
00:05:30,519 --> 00:05:32,186
It looks like
a see-through box.
171
00:05:32,220 --> 00:05:34,523
Good eye.
It's a protective
Lucite case.
172
00:05:34,556 --> 00:05:38,493
Ideally, I'd have it in what
the CDC calls a "clean room."
173
00:05:38,527 --> 00:05:41,295
But this'll have to do
until those paper pushers
call me back.
174
00:05:41,329 --> 00:05:43,297
But you have to ride it.
175
00:05:43,331 --> 00:05:45,199
And plus, it clogs up
the whole room.
176
00:05:45,233 --> 00:05:46,601
It doesn't leave a lot
of space for dancing,
177
00:05:46,635 --> 00:05:48,336
but at least I know
she's safe.
178
00:05:48,369 --> 00:05:49,471
Safe from what?
179
00:05:49,504 --> 00:05:50,972
I bought it for you
to play with,
180
00:05:51,005 --> 00:05:52,140
like all your other toys.
181
00:05:52,173 --> 00:05:54,543
But I am treating it
like all my other toys.
182
00:05:54,576 --> 00:05:55,644
Behold!
183
00:05:55,677 --> 00:05:57,045
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS)
184
00:05:57,078 --> 00:06:01,215
Look at that.
All his Starboys and GI Jims
are in little prisons.
185
00:06:01,249 --> 00:06:03,351
You know it!
I'm off.
186
00:06:03,384 --> 00:06:04,619
No one touch
the thermostat.
187
00:06:04,653 --> 00:06:07,321
The best protection against
temperature is vigilance.
188
00:06:08,322 --> 00:06:10,058
When did he start
boxing up his toys
189
00:06:10,091 --> 00:06:11,693
like it's the world's
saddest museum?
190
00:06:11,726 --> 00:06:13,762
I guess he likes
looking at 'em now
191
00:06:13,795 --> 00:06:15,229
more than
playing with them.
192
00:06:15,263 --> 00:06:16,998
But he's my schmoo.
He loves to play.
193
00:06:17,031 --> 00:06:19,634
Bevy, no one stays
a kid forever.
194
00:06:19,668 --> 00:06:21,002
That's it!
195
00:06:21,035 --> 00:06:23,004
I'll make him stay
a kid forever!
196
00:06:23,037 --> 00:06:24,338
I'm not gonna stop you.
197
00:06:24,372 --> 00:06:26,340
I've learned
to conserve my energy.
198
00:06:26,374 --> 00:06:28,309
I'm not just
gonna give him
Pee-wee's bike.
199
00:06:28,342 --> 00:06:30,378
I'm gonna give him
the whole damn adventure!
200
00:06:30,411 --> 00:06:32,346
The rantings of a lunatic.
201
00:06:32,380 --> 00:06:33,414
But have a ball.
202
00:06:33,448 --> 00:06:35,650
Again, I'm tired.
203
00:06:35,684 --> 00:06:38,653
ADULT ADAM: And so,
in an effort to keep
my childlike wonder alive,
204
00:06:38,687 --> 00:06:41,656
my mom pulled a move straight
out of the Pee-wee playbook.
205
00:06:41,690 --> 00:06:43,725
(GASPS, SCREAMS)
206
00:06:43,758 --> 00:06:45,126
Somebody stole my bike!
207
00:06:45,159 --> 00:06:48,129
Oh, no! Who would commit
such a heinous act?
208
00:06:48,162 --> 00:06:50,064
Best guess,
a crazy person.
209
00:06:50,098 --> 00:06:52,501
We can't just sit here!
We gotta get it back!
210
00:06:52,534 --> 00:06:54,936
Yes, we do. Well, sounds like
we're in for an adventure.
211
00:06:55,804 --> 00:06:57,772
A big adventure.
212
00:06:57,806 --> 00:06:59,708
A Pee-wee's big adventure.
213
00:06:59,741 --> 00:07:01,409
That's a weird way
to put it, but sure!
214
00:07:01,442 --> 00:07:03,144
I'll go draw up
a list of suspects.
215
00:07:03,177 --> 00:07:04,713
Know what's suspect?
216
00:07:04,746 --> 00:07:06,080
Your parenting style.
217
00:07:06,114 --> 00:07:08,449
What mother steals
her son's bike?
218
00:07:08,483 --> 00:07:12,220
A mother who wants
her boy to relive
the magic of the movie.
219
00:07:12,253 --> 00:07:14,122
Once he experiences
that joy,
220
00:07:14,155 --> 00:07:15,990
he'll be certain
to jump on that bike again.
221
00:07:16,024 --> 00:07:18,292
I-I'm just gonna sit here.
(CHUCKLES)
222
00:07:18,326 --> 00:07:20,762
ADULT ADAM: While my mom
was tricking me into
being a kid again,
223
00:07:20,795 --> 00:07:23,532
living without a car
was proving to be
tricky for Barry.
224
00:07:23,565 --> 00:07:25,433
I can't ride
the bus anymore.
225
00:07:25,466 --> 00:07:27,001
Do you know
what kinda people
are on there?
226
00:07:27,035 --> 00:07:28,970
A delightful cross section
of our great city?
227
00:07:29,003 --> 00:07:31,305
It's a rolling caravan
of monsters!
228
00:07:31,339 --> 00:07:32,774
Oh, that's not
entirely fair, man.
229
00:07:32,807 --> 00:07:36,010
What's not fair is having
someone cough soup on you.
230
00:07:36,044 --> 00:07:37,646
So you're making friends.
Good for you.
231
00:07:37,679 --> 00:07:39,781
Don't! Okay?
You got our car booted,
232
00:07:39,814 --> 00:07:41,650
and now I have to
sit next to a lady
233
00:07:41,683 --> 00:07:44,352
with an animal in her lap
I don't even recognize.
234
00:07:44,385 --> 00:07:46,888
It has the qualities
of a squirrel
but the face of baby.
235
00:07:46,921 --> 00:07:48,957
That can't be real.
You want to know
what's real?
236
00:07:48,990 --> 00:07:53,562
A man with a unibrow
didn't break eye contact
with me for over an hour.
237
00:07:53,595 --> 00:07:55,329
"Why are you smiling, sir?
238
00:07:55,363 --> 00:07:57,131
"And where are you going
with all that fish?"
239
00:07:57,165 --> 00:07:58,767
We get it,
you're not a bus guy.
240
00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:01,002
But there's nothing
I can do about it at
three dollars an hour.
241
00:08:01,035 --> 00:08:03,171
I would kill
for three dollars an hour!
242
00:08:03,204 --> 00:08:06,007
You know I bust my ass
making latte foam art?
243
00:08:06,040 --> 00:08:07,809
And then the
coffee shop owner
Ryan comes in
244
00:08:07,842 --> 00:08:09,477
rocking a new pair of
British Knights every week.
245
00:08:09,510 --> 00:08:12,280
British Knights? The sporty
footwear of medieval royals?
246
00:08:12,313 --> 00:08:13,381
We should rob
this Ryan guy.
247
00:08:13,414 --> 00:08:15,216
Or we could open
our own coffee shop.
248
00:08:15,249 --> 00:08:17,652
Yes. We'll destroy Ryan
that way.
249
00:08:17,686 --> 00:08:19,487
Great. All we need now
are two things...
250
00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:20,755
Coffee and a shop.
251
00:08:20,789 --> 00:08:22,390
Well, we've got
the Ottoman Empire.
252
00:08:22,423 --> 00:08:24,325
Yeah, right, dummy.
Like Dad would ever let us.
253
00:08:24,358 --> 00:08:27,061
He'll never know. It'll be
an after-hours coffee shop.
254
00:08:27,095 --> 00:08:29,698
Oh, no! My lighthearted
attempt to be part
of the conversation
255
00:08:29,731 --> 00:08:31,199
is fueling Barry's
darkest instincts!
256
00:08:31,232 --> 00:08:33,467
Yeah, it is!
We'll have everything
we need...
257
00:08:33,501 --> 00:08:36,838
Couches, a coffee machine
in the break room,
and the keys.
258
00:08:36,871 --> 00:08:38,272
No way. Too risky.
259
00:08:38,306 --> 00:08:41,843
But it's the quickest way
to get the boot off
and me off the bus.
260
00:08:41,876 --> 00:08:43,411
People shave on there.
261
00:08:43,444 --> 00:08:44,613
And not just their faces.
262
00:08:44,646 --> 00:08:47,215
I'm kinda liking
this coffee shop idea.
263
00:08:47,248 --> 00:08:48,416
All right, fine.
264
00:08:48,449 --> 00:08:50,051
But we have
to be super careful about it
265
00:08:50,084 --> 00:08:51,352
and cover everything
in plastic and...
266
00:08:51,385 --> 00:08:52,654
Then it's decided!
267
00:08:52,687 --> 00:08:54,388
The Ottoman Empire
will become...
268
00:08:54,422 --> 00:08:55,657
The Empire Lounge!
269
00:08:55,690 --> 00:08:57,425
Wow. Where did all
these people come from?
270
00:08:57,458 --> 00:08:59,861
Who cares? We're making
money hand over fist.
271
00:08:59,894 --> 00:09:01,362
Pla-ding!
Pla-ding?
272
00:09:01,395 --> 00:09:02,731
Yeah, it's the cash
register sound.
273
00:09:02,764 --> 00:09:04,198
I think you mean
cha-ching.
274
00:09:04,232 --> 00:09:05,399
It's a good thing
you got your looks.
275
00:09:05,433 --> 00:09:07,001
Anyway... Pla-ding!
276
00:09:07,035 --> 00:09:09,403
$14?
This is just fanning money.
277
00:09:09,437 --> 00:09:10,504
Here's the rest.
278
00:09:10,538 --> 00:09:11,806
Holy crap! Pla-ding!
279
00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:13,107
Think of what
we can do with this!
280
00:09:13,141 --> 00:09:14,575
Yeah, like get
the boot off the car.
281
00:09:14,609 --> 00:09:17,245
Think bigger.
We can get two boots
off the car.
282
00:09:17,278 --> 00:09:19,213
ADULT ADAM: As Erica
had solved her car issues,
283
00:09:19,247 --> 00:09:21,650
I was about to solve
a case of my own.
284
00:09:21,683 --> 00:09:24,252
Exhibit A... A photograph
of the victims.
285
00:09:24,285 --> 00:09:26,120
My bike and me.
286
00:09:26,154 --> 00:09:28,056
Exhibit B...
Another photograph.
287
00:09:28,089 --> 00:09:29,190
What's wrong here?
288
00:09:29,223 --> 00:09:30,992
I'm not at home, making
dinner for my family?
289
00:09:31,025 --> 00:09:32,093
Aha!
290
00:09:32,126 --> 00:09:34,395
The first one to speak
always did it.
291
00:09:34,428 --> 00:09:36,564
Did what? I just came over
because Bev told me
292
00:09:36,597 --> 00:09:38,099
she was returning
my standing mixer.
293
00:09:38,132 --> 00:09:40,134
Ginzy, please.
That thing is long gone.
294
00:09:40,168 --> 00:09:42,303
(WHISPERING)
Is there something
you'd like to share
295
00:09:42,336 --> 00:09:43,772
with the rest of us,
Emmy Mirsky?
296
00:09:43,805 --> 00:09:45,173
I was wondering
what we're doing here.
297
00:09:45,206 --> 00:09:47,742
My bike was stolen!
And one of you did it!
298
00:09:47,776 --> 00:09:50,278
(WHISPERING) Yes!
This is going better than
I could've ever imagined.
299
00:09:50,311 --> 00:09:52,180
Let's review the facts.
300
00:09:52,213 --> 00:09:54,448
The thief had to have
access to my room
301
00:09:54,482 --> 00:09:56,117
and know all my movements.
302
00:09:56,150 --> 00:09:57,886
And they had the key
to the master lock
303
00:09:57,919 --> 00:10:00,188
that only me
and my mom possess.
304
00:10:00,221 --> 00:10:01,589
Just going out
on a limb here,
305
00:10:01,622 --> 00:10:03,224
but Beverly definitely
took your bike.
306
00:10:03,257 --> 00:10:04,793
That makes sense.
Yeah, I thought that
307
00:10:04,826 --> 00:10:06,394
before I even knew
what this was about.
308
00:10:06,427 --> 00:10:08,329
Mama!
Did you take my bike?
309
00:10:08,362 --> 00:10:09,430
It was Dave Kim!
310
00:10:09,463 --> 00:10:10,899
No, it wasn't!
311
00:10:10,932 --> 00:10:13,334
I saw it. He slipped
in through the chimney
like a turtlenecked Santa.
312
00:10:13,367 --> 00:10:15,804
Enough.
She did it, Adam!
313
00:10:15,837 --> 00:10:20,041
For some reason,
she wanted to give you
Pee-pee's big excursion.
314
00:10:20,074 --> 00:10:22,811
Fine! It was me!
But wasn't this fun?
315
00:10:22,844 --> 00:10:23,978
No.
Balls!
316
00:10:24,012 --> 00:10:26,647
I should have known!
Take me to my bike
now, woman!
317
00:10:26,681 --> 00:10:29,117
Well, it was right here,
and now it's not.
318
00:10:29,150 --> 00:10:30,752
Someone
actually stole it?
319
00:10:30,785 --> 00:10:32,353
Who would do
such a thing?
320
00:10:32,386 --> 00:10:34,155
And yes,
I see what I did there!
321
00:10:35,990 --> 00:10:37,591
ADULT ADAM: Hoping to
keep me a kid at heart,
322
00:10:37,625 --> 00:10:40,528
my mom had taken
My most prized possession,
my Pee-wee bike.
323
00:10:40,561 --> 00:10:42,063
But then someone
stole it for real.
324
00:10:42,096 --> 00:10:44,933
Schmoopy,
I know you're upset,
but I actually think
325
00:10:44,966 --> 00:10:47,135
this is a fun wrinkle
to our adventure.
326
00:10:47,168 --> 00:10:48,302
Fun wrinkle?
327
00:10:48,336 --> 00:10:51,305
This isn't something
you can slather
your Oil of Olay on!
328
00:10:51,339 --> 00:10:53,374
Our most valuable asset
is out in the world!
329
00:10:53,407 --> 00:10:55,977
And that's why
we're in the park...
To get it back.
330
00:10:56,010 --> 00:11:00,114
Surely, the filthy
BMX community will
champion your cause.
331
00:11:00,148 --> 00:11:01,382
Locals only.
332
00:11:01,415 --> 00:11:04,118
Johnny Atkins?
It's me. Adam Goldberg.
333
00:11:04,152 --> 00:11:05,820
I have pretty severe
face blindness.
334
00:11:05,854 --> 00:11:07,956
I have to stitch together
noises and shapes and...
335
00:11:07,989 --> 00:11:09,490
Hey, your hot mom.
336
00:11:09,523 --> 00:11:12,093
Hello, Jonathan.
Have you seen this bike?
337
00:11:12,126 --> 00:11:13,394
Looks familiar.
ADAM: It does?
338
00:11:13,427 --> 00:11:15,663
You know something,
don't you? Where is it?
339
00:11:15,696 --> 00:11:18,166
Yeah, I'm inclined to help you
find your Pee-wee bike,
340
00:11:18,199 --> 00:11:20,001
but I'm gonna need
a favor first.
341
00:11:20,034 --> 00:11:22,136
Name it.
You gotta do the Tequila
dance from the movie.
342
00:11:22,170 --> 00:11:24,038
What? No way.
Way.
343
00:11:24,072 --> 00:11:26,107
And I'm gonna
need your foxy mama
to do it, too.
344
00:11:26,140 --> 00:11:27,742
Oh, no!
We are not dancing for you!
345
00:11:27,776 --> 00:11:29,277
Come on.
It'll be fun, sweetie.
346
00:11:29,310 --> 00:11:32,346
And hey, look! I'm already
on the picnic table.
347
00:11:32,380 --> 00:11:33,848
Cheggit.
Your mom's on board.
348
00:11:33,882 --> 00:11:36,584
Better get up there, too,
or no bikey.
349
00:11:36,617 --> 00:11:38,519
(THE CHAMPS' TEQUILA PLAYS)
350
00:11:57,939 --> 00:11:59,073
(LAUGHS)
351
00:12:02,276 --> 00:12:03,677
BEVERLY AND JOHNNY:
* Tequila! *
352
00:12:03,711 --> 00:12:06,247
(LAUGHS)
That was so much fun!
353
00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:08,182
Do you have
When a Man Loves a Woman?
354
00:12:08,216 --> 00:12:11,052
No more mother-son dancing.
Tell me where my bike is.
355
00:12:11,085 --> 00:12:12,921
Lemme think about it.
I swiped it.
356
00:12:12,954 --> 00:12:14,222
You? Why?
357
00:12:14,255 --> 00:12:17,558
I really liked it,
I didn't have it,
and so I took it.
358
00:12:17,591 --> 00:12:19,861
In hindsight, I'm not sure
I'm the hero in this story.
359
00:12:19,894 --> 00:12:22,230
Grand...theft...bicycle!
360
00:12:22,263 --> 00:12:23,731
I'm calling the cops, man!
361
00:12:23,764 --> 00:12:25,033
No need to involve
the cops,
362
00:12:25,066 --> 00:12:26,935
especially since I stole
the bike first.
363
00:12:26,968 --> 00:12:28,169
What don't we have
in common?
364
00:12:28,202 --> 00:12:30,171
But now just point us
to where the bike is.
365
00:12:30,204 --> 00:12:31,572
I guess
it's in that direction.
366
00:12:31,605 --> 00:12:34,742
But way past those trees and
there's, like, a bucolic glen
367
00:12:34,775 --> 00:12:36,710
where the light
dances on a pond.
368
00:12:36,744 --> 00:12:39,047
We're not
Hansel and Gretel!
Say the place!
369
00:12:39,080 --> 00:12:42,516
St. Vincent's. I felt guilty
I swiped it, so I unloaded it
on the nuns there.
370
00:12:42,550 --> 00:12:43,784
They need it more than me.
371
00:12:43,818 --> 00:12:45,253
Yeah, you know who
needs it more than them?
372
00:12:45,286 --> 00:12:47,388
Me!
The guy who owns it!
373
00:12:47,421 --> 00:12:50,992
Look at it this way, boopie,
the adventure continues.
374
00:12:51,025 --> 00:12:53,727
Does it continue?
Frickin' yay!
375
00:12:53,761 --> 00:12:55,196
Just get in the car!
376
00:12:55,229 --> 00:12:57,198
As I had a promising lead
on my wheels,
377
00:12:57,231 --> 00:12:59,834
Barry and Erica finally
got the boot off of theirs.
378
00:12:59,868 --> 00:13:01,970
Sweet relief.
We got our car back,
379
00:13:02,003 --> 00:13:03,804
and now I never have to
ride on a bus again.
380
00:13:03,838 --> 00:13:05,773
What's wrong
with the bus?
Oh, I don't know.
381
00:13:05,806 --> 00:13:06,975
Maybe 'cause
I went three stops
382
00:13:07,008 --> 00:13:08,309
as a stranger
brushed my hair.
383
00:13:08,342 --> 00:13:10,078
(SCOFFS)
384
00:13:10,111 --> 00:13:12,580
I gotta admit, using the store
worked out pretty well,
385
00:13:12,613 --> 00:13:13,915
and Dad
never had a clue.
386
00:13:13,948 --> 00:13:15,616
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where do you
think you're going?
387
00:13:15,649 --> 00:13:17,218
The car's mine
for the next week
388
00:13:17,251 --> 00:13:18,386
to make up
for your boot time.
389
00:13:18,419 --> 00:13:20,154
But I gotta go quit
and give Dad his keys back.
390
00:13:20,188 --> 00:13:22,456
What? You can't quit!
We need those keys!
391
00:13:22,490 --> 00:13:24,325
Our lucrative business
is just taking off.
392
00:13:24,358 --> 00:13:26,327
Barry, the boot's gone.
We're done.
393
00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:28,662
Oh, we're just
getting started, baby.
394
00:13:28,696 --> 00:13:29,964
Baby?
(CHUCKLING) Yeah.
395
00:13:29,998 --> 00:13:32,033
That's the way nightlife
impresarios talk.
396
00:13:32,066 --> 00:13:34,302
They pepper
in "babies," "muffins,"
"pretty mamas,"
397
00:13:34,335 --> 00:13:36,137
and my personal favorite...
"Jennifer."
398
00:13:36,170 --> 00:13:37,238
What are you talking about?
399
00:13:37,271 --> 00:13:39,874
I'm talking about keeping
the coffee shop open.
400
00:13:39,908 --> 00:13:43,344
But instead, it's the Atlantic
seaboard's hottest nightclub.
401
00:13:43,377 --> 00:13:44,445
Absolutely not.
402
00:13:44,478 --> 00:13:46,447
This is Dad's livelihood
we're talking about.
403
00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:49,417
We made
more money than Dad
ever has in one day.
404
00:13:49,450 --> 00:13:50,618
I mean,
who doesn't like money?
405
00:13:50,651 --> 00:13:52,820
Ugly, stupid people
who can't buy stuff.
406
00:13:52,853 --> 00:13:55,823
But if you do this,
you'll be dripping in...
407
00:13:55,856 --> 00:13:57,158
Diamonds?
Better!
408
00:13:57,191 --> 00:13:59,493
Butter. When you're eating
lobster every night.
409
00:13:59,527 --> 00:14:01,595
Gross. I don't want buttery
lobster meat every night.
410
00:14:01,629 --> 00:14:05,166
Then perhaps you'll
like the finest timepieces
known to man.
411
00:14:05,199 --> 00:14:06,834
Swatch.
I already have
two of those.
412
00:14:06,867 --> 00:14:08,169
Ah, how would you
like 200?
413
00:14:08,202 --> 00:14:09,637
I wouldn't.
That's too many.
414
00:14:09,670 --> 00:14:11,505
You're absolutely terrible
at selling wealth.
415
00:14:11,539 --> 00:14:13,908
So we're doing it?
Fine. But just
one more night.
416
00:14:13,942 --> 00:14:15,476
And nothing can happen
to Dad's store.
417
00:14:15,509 --> 00:14:16,610
A reluctant "fine."
418
00:14:16,644 --> 00:14:18,846
What every business
partner wants to hear.
419
00:14:18,879 --> 00:14:20,881
Thanks again.
Come back soon.
420
00:14:20,915 --> 00:14:22,750
There's my
Employee of the Week!
421
00:14:22,783 --> 00:14:25,286
Wow, my 14-year streak
is over
422
00:14:25,319 --> 00:14:27,088
'cause your daughter
sold a table lamp.
423
00:14:27,121 --> 00:14:28,556
All good things
must come to an end.
424
00:14:28,589 --> 00:14:30,058
But what do you say you guys
shake a leg out of here
425
00:14:30,091 --> 00:14:31,359
and I'll do the rest?
VIC: Lovely.
426
00:14:31,392 --> 00:14:35,196
Nothing like having
a light shone on how
unessential I am.
427
00:14:35,229 --> 00:14:36,464
Toodle-oo!
428
00:14:36,497 --> 00:14:38,699
MURRAY: You're really doing
a number on Vic's noodle.
429
00:14:38,732 --> 00:14:40,901
But I gotta say
it's been great
having you here.
430
00:14:40,935 --> 00:14:42,903
Dad, you don't have
to say that.
I do.
431
00:14:42,937 --> 00:14:44,072
Since you've gone off
to college,
432
00:14:44,105 --> 00:14:46,174
we've barely spent
any time together.
433
00:14:46,207 --> 00:14:48,342
But I have to say,
it's been a joy seeing
434
00:14:48,376 --> 00:14:50,478
what a delightful
young woman
you've become.
435
00:14:50,511 --> 00:14:52,780
Wow. That's might be
the nicest thing you've
ever said to me.
436
00:14:52,813 --> 00:14:54,715
You sure you don't
want to call me
a moron or something?
437
00:14:54,748 --> 00:14:56,717
Why would I?
You're finally not one.
438
00:14:56,750 --> 00:14:58,186
(SMOOCHES)
439
00:14:58,219 --> 00:15:00,388
Damn it. That was
so warm and touching.
440
00:15:00,421 --> 00:15:01,722
It's almost like you care.
441
00:15:01,755 --> 00:15:03,391
Yeah,
I guess I almost do.
442
00:15:03,424 --> 00:15:05,960
ADULT ADAM:
As Erica was wondering
if she'd lost her way,
443
00:15:05,994 --> 00:15:08,662
I was headed down
the right path.
To church.
444
00:15:08,696 --> 00:15:10,198
(GASPS)
There she is!
445
00:15:10,231 --> 00:15:11,732
(HEAVENLY MUSIC PLAYS)
446
00:15:11,765 --> 00:15:13,334
Excuse me.
May I help you?
447
00:15:13,367 --> 00:15:15,436
Oh, it's okay, Sister.
That's my son's bike.
448
00:15:15,469 --> 00:15:18,506
Sorry, but once it's donated,
it's property of the parish.
449
00:15:18,539 --> 00:15:19,573
It's God's bike now.
450
00:15:19,607 --> 00:15:21,109
Well, does God
have a receipt?
451
00:15:21,142 --> 00:15:22,710
God needs no receipts.
452
00:15:22,743 --> 00:15:25,579
You know what?
You are a very mean lady.
453
00:15:25,613 --> 00:15:27,115
I know you are,
but what am I?
454
00:15:27,148 --> 00:15:28,382
ADAM: Just let me explain.
455
00:15:28,416 --> 00:15:30,418
See, my mom got me this bike,
then she stole it,
456
00:15:30,451 --> 00:15:31,852
and then someone
stole it from her,
457
00:15:31,885 --> 00:15:33,621
and then we did a wildly
embarrassing dance
458
00:15:33,654 --> 00:15:35,323
in front of a bunch
of BMX bikers.
459
00:15:35,356 --> 00:15:38,259
That brought us here.
You're messing with the
wrong sister, mister.
460
00:15:38,292 --> 00:15:39,527
Okay.
461
00:15:39,560 --> 00:15:41,795
In that moment,
I did something
I'm not proud of.
462
00:15:41,829 --> 00:15:43,264
Well, I'm kind of
proud of it.
463
00:15:43,297 --> 00:15:46,334
Yes, my little Pee-wee!
Ride! Ride like the wind!
464
00:15:46,367 --> 00:15:49,303
This is why we got the bike
in the first place!
465
00:15:49,337 --> 00:15:51,472
Don't root for me!
I'm still mad at you!
466
00:15:51,505 --> 00:15:54,908
And just like Pee-wee,
I was off to lead dozens
of authority figures
467
00:15:54,942 --> 00:15:56,610
on the most
epic chase ever!
468
00:15:58,512 --> 00:15:59,613
Or...not.
469
00:15:59,647 --> 00:16:00,914
BEVERLY:
Adam, are you okay?
470
00:16:00,948 --> 00:16:04,118
Let Mama's magical kisses
heal your broken bones.
471
00:16:04,152 --> 00:16:06,187
Get away from me!
You can't fix this!
472
00:16:06,220 --> 00:16:07,321
Look at my bike!
473
00:16:08,489 --> 00:16:09,657
I'm so sorry.
474
00:16:09,690 --> 00:16:11,292
Thanks
for the birthday gift.
475
00:16:11,325 --> 00:16:14,728
While my mom's big adventure
to keep me young at heart
was a big failure,
476
00:16:14,762 --> 00:16:17,298
the Empire Lounge
was turning into
a huge success.
477
00:16:17,331 --> 00:16:19,467
Holy crap!
This place is packed!
478
00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:21,369
I know. They're using throw
pillows to actually throw.
479
00:16:21,402 --> 00:16:24,372
Whoo! The Empire Lounge
is almost at full capacity.
480
00:16:24,405 --> 00:16:27,641
But don't worry.
Naked Rob is only letting
in nines and above.
481
00:16:27,675 --> 00:16:29,043
Barry, is that
a pencil mustache?
482
00:16:29,077 --> 00:16:30,378
I'm trying out
a new persona...
483
00:16:30,411 --> 00:16:33,914
I'm club owner
and Jai Alai enthusiast
Barry Mexico.
484
00:16:33,947 --> 00:16:35,349
What a fun
and lazy character name.
485
00:16:35,383 --> 00:16:36,784
Was it your first thought?
You know it!
486
00:16:36,817 --> 00:16:39,153
Barry Mexico
gets down to business.
487
00:16:39,187 --> 00:16:40,754
You need to get
all these people
out of here.
488
00:16:40,788 --> 00:16:42,123
They're all over
Dad's furniture.
489
00:16:42,156 --> 00:16:44,024
It's Cinco de Mayo
somewhere.
It's really not.
490
00:16:44,992 --> 00:16:46,460
(GASPS) Oh, no!
491
00:16:46,494 --> 00:16:49,130
Dad's shoddily made furniture
is falling apart.
492
00:16:49,163 --> 00:16:52,333
No, it's not!
It's affordable,
modern, and stylish!
493
00:16:52,366 --> 00:16:54,335
Damn it, I have pride
in this establishment!
494
00:16:54,368 --> 00:16:56,304
We're out of coffee.
And... "Not coffee."
495
00:16:56,337 --> 00:16:57,605
You're serving alcohol?
496
00:16:57,638 --> 00:16:59,773
Come on, you can't
have an illegal
after-hours nightclub
497
00:16:59,807 --> 00:17:01,041
without some hooch.
498
00:17:01,075 --> 00:17:03,411
We're all going to jail!
Where I will totally
snitch to survive!
499
00:17:03,444 --> 00:17:04,878
None of you are safe!
You all did it!
500
00:17:04,912 --> 00:17:06,980
Look what you did!
Geoff's a rat now!
501
00:17:07,014 --> 00:17:08,082
This couldn't get
any worse!
502
00:17:08,116 --> 00:17:09,350
What the hell's
going on here?
503
00:17:09,383 --> 00:17:10,784
And yet it did!
Aah!
504
00:17:10,818 --> 00:17:13,321
You two are in big trouble!
Especially you!
505
00:17:13,354 --> 00:17:14,688
Me? This was
Barry's idea!
506
00:17:14,722 --> 00:17:16,724
Who's Barry?
I'm Barry Mexico.
507
00:17:16,757 --> 00:17:18,426
You listened
to this moron?
508
00:17:18,459 --> 00:17:21,662
No, I gave you the keys.
You were responsible.
509
00:17:21,695 --> 00:17:23,097
Daddy...
Don't you "Daddy" me.
510
00:17:23,131 --> 00:17:25,266
I thought you'd grown up,
but I was wrong.
511
00:17:25,299 --> 00:17:28,769
You're still the same
moron that I always
thought you were.
512
00:17:32,039 --> 00:17:34,208
ADULT ADAM: To repair my bike
and our relationship,
513
00:17:34,242 --> 00:17:35,643
my mom turned to a pro.
514
00:17:35,676 --> 00:17:37,211
Thank you for coming,
Jonathan.
515
00:17:37,245 --> 00:17:39,813
I couldn't think
of another person
who could fix this.
516
00:17:39,847 --> 00:17:42,116
Damn. I thought it
was gonna be
a box of kittens,
517
00:17:42,150 --> 00:17:43,417
but that's
just a messed-up bike.
518
00:17:43,451 --> 00:17:45,085
And you're going to fix it.
519
00:17:45,119 --> 00:17:47,721
Since you stole it from me
after I stole it from Adam,
520
00:17:47,755 --> 00:17:49,190
who later stole it
from some nuns.
521
00:17:49,223 --> 00:17:50,924
What an unlikely journey.
522
00:17:50,958 --> 00:17:53,227
Sounds like Johnny's back
is against the wall.
523
00:17:53,261 --> 00:17:55,896
Lucky for you,
that's when I shine.
524
00:17:55,929 --> 00:17:57,131
Get me all
your husband's tools.
525
00:17:57,165 --> 00:17:59,567
He has none.
Get me all your neighbor's
husband's tools.
526
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:01,769
ADULT ADAM: And so
Johnny got to work.
527
00:18:01,802 --> 00:18:04,605
My mom hoped that all that
welding, whacking, fusing,
528
00:18:04,638 --> 00:18:06,607
soldering, wrenching,
and different whacking
529
00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:09,410
would restore my birthday
gift to its true Pee-wee form.
530
00:18:09,443 --> 00:18:11,279
What the (BLEEP) is this?
It didn't.
531
00:18:11,312 --> 00:18:13,481
This came out way better
than I thought it would.
532
00:18:13,514 --> 00:18:14,815
This was a big mistake.
533
00:18:14,848 --> 00:18:17,485
The important thing is,
I tried my best
and had a good time.
534
00:18:17,518 --> 00:18:19,620
ADULT ADAM: With that,
my mom was out of options,
535
00:18:19,653 --> 00:18:22,122
except, of course, taking it
to an actual repair shop.
536
00:18:22,156 --> 00:18:23,491
BEVERLY:
Look what I got!
537
00:18:23,524 --> 00:18:26,194
The bike is fixed,
and so is our relationship.
538
00:18:26,227 --> 00:18:27,728
Yay! Everything's back
to the way it was.
539
00:18:27,761 --> 00:18:29,297
No. It isn't.
540
00:18:29,330 --> 00:18:31,732
My Pee-wee bike has been
completely rebuilt.
541
00:18:31,765 --> 00:18:32,933
It's worthless.
542
00:18:32,966 --> 00:18:34,435
Well, maybe
to some collector.
543
00:18:34,468 --> 00:18:36,304
But now
you can actually ride it.
544
00:18:36,337 --> 00:18:37,938
Why do you want me
to ride it so bad?
545
00:18:37,971 --> 00:18:41,041
Because it made me sad
that you don't play
with your toys anymore.
546
00:18:41,074 --> 00:18:42,676
They shouldn't
be locked away.
547
00:18:42,710 --> 00:18:44,645
You need to find your joy
for them again.
548
00:18:44,678 --> 00:18:46,280
You mean play with them
like a child?
549
00:18:46,314 --> 00:18:47,348
Mom, I'm not anymore.
550
00:18:47,381 --> 00:18:48,649
I know.
551
00:18:48,682 --> 00:18:50,251
But you're
growing up too fast.
552
00:18:50,284 --> 00:18:51,319
I mean, what is the hurry?
553
00:18:51,352 --> 00:18:52,520
Gah!
554
00:18:52,553 --> 00:18:54,688
I get it!
You never want me
to grow up!
555
00:18:54,722 --> 00:18:56,657
Fine. I'm struggling
with the fact
556
00:18:56,690 --> 00:18:58,659
that my youngest baby
is becoming a man.
557
00:18:58,692 --> 00:19:01,094
But it's also true
558
00:19:01,128 --> 00:19:03,130
that being an adult
is overrated.
559
00:19:04,198 --> 00:19:07,635
It's full of responsibility
and stress and worry.
560
00:19:07,668 --> 00:19:09,503
And you don't
need that yet.
561
00:19:09,537 --> 00:19:11,772
Mom, everyone
goes through this.
562
00:19:11,805 --> 00:19:12,840
I'm gonna be fine.
563
00:19:12,873 --> 00:19:14,375
I know you will.
564
00:19:14,408 --> 00:19:16,377
(THE PRIMITIVES' CRASH PLAYS)
565
00:19:16,410 --> 00:19:19,012
I just hope that no matter
how old you get,
566
00:19:19,046 --> 00:19:22,149
there will always be a part
of you that's still playful.
567
00:19:22,182 --> 00:19:24,685
Actually, before I crashed
into that truck,
568
00:19:24,718 --> 00:19:26,454
it was pretty great
riding this thing.
569
00:19:26,487 --> 00:19:29,089
Well, there's no reason
you can't feel that way again.
570
00:19:29,122 --> 00:19:33,294
* Here you go, way too fast
571
00:19:33,327 --> 00:19:35,796
* Don't slow down,
you're gonna crash
572
00:19:35,829 --> 00:19:36,997
Thanks, Mama.
573
00:19:37,030 --> 00:19:38,966
* Watch your step
574
00:19:38,999 --> 00:19:40,834
* Don't look out,
gonna break your neck
575
00:19:41,569 --> 00:19:42,570
You coming?
576
00:19:43,771 --> 00:19:45,573
ADULT ADAM: That's the thing
about growing up...
577
00:19:45,606 --> 00:19:47,541
It happens whether
you're ready or not.
578
00:19:47,575 --> 00:19:49,943
* So what do you want of me?
579
00:19:49,977 --> 00:19:52,045
* Got no words of sympathy
580
00:19:52,079 --> 00:19:53,146
What's this?
581
00:19:53,180 --> 00:19:54,915
I was here all night
cleaning up the mess I made.
582
00:19:55,449 --> 00:19:56,817
Dad, I am so sorry.
583
00:19:56,850 --> 00:19:59,987
I trashed your store,
and, even worse,
I broke your trust.
584
00:20:00,020 --> 00:20:02,022
That's not even
what really bothers me.
585
00:20:03,257 --> 00:20:05,693
I just liked spending
time with you.
It was nice.
586
00:20:05,726 --> 00:20:07,194
And I screwed it all up.
587
00:20:07,227 --> 00:20:08,829
Things can be fixed.
588
00:20:08,862 --> 00:20:12,666
Can they? Because
I'd really like to pay
for everything I broke.
589
00:20:12,700 --> 00:20:15,503
But, more importantly,
I'd like to fix us.
590
00:20:15,536 --> 00:20:17,305
That might take some time.
591
00:20:17,338 --> 00:20:18,539
I know.
592
00:20:18,572 --> 00:20:20,040
But I have some.
593
00:20:20,073 --> 00:20:21,975
Say, after class
every day?
594
00:20:22,009 --> 00:20:23,444
You still wanna work here?
595
00:20:23,477 --> 00:20:24,612
If you still want me.
596
00:20:24,645 --> 00:20:27,147
There are worse ways
to spend my day.
597
00:20:27,180 --> 00:20:30,584
* Na, na-na, na-na,
na, na-na, na-na *
598
00:20:30,618 --> 00:20:33,321
ADULT ADAM: Sometimes,
parents worry
we're never gonna grow up
599
00:20:33,354 --> 00:20:36,056
or that we're growing up
way too fast.
600
00:20:36,089 --> 00:20:39,059
But you can't just pump
the brakes on life.
601
00:20:39,092 --> 00:20:41,161
So if you're willing
to shift gears
602
00:20:41,194 --> 00:20:43,564
and trust the people
you love,
603
00:20:43,597 --> 00:20:46,434
every day
can be a big adventure.
604
00:20:48,936 --> 00:20:51,739
(AS PEE-WEE HERMAN)
Hi! Hee ha ahh!
605
00:20:51,772 --> 00:20:54,408
My name is... Ahh!
Adam Goldberg!
606
00:20:54,442 --> 00:20:57,177
(BELL DINGS)
607
00:20:57,210 --> 00:20:58,312
(LAUGHS)
608
00:20:59,980 --> 00:21:02,550
Oh, my God,
I can't take it anymore!
Why?
609
00:21:02,583 --> 00:21:05,886
Since Dad took away the car,
I have to ride the bus!
610
00:21:05,919 --> 00:21:08,522
An old man showed me
the bruise on his back!
611
00:21:08,556 --> 00:21:10,223
It was like looking at
the inside of a pomegranate.
612
00:21:10,257 --> 00:21:11,459
That can't be right.
Ew!
613
00:21:11,492 --> 00:21:14,528
What's not right
is how much cooking
is done on there.
614
00:21:14,562 --> 00:21:16,930
I saw a guy heating up
a pot of eels.
615
00:21:16,964 --> 00:21:18,366
Eels?
Eels!
616
00:21:18,399 --> 00:21:20,233
And there's
so much fighting!
617
00:21:20,267 --> 00:21:22,736
An old woman clocked
the bus driver
618
00:21:22,770 --> 00:21:24,237
with a fraternity paddle!
619
00:21:24,271 --> 00:21:25,439
Who gave that to her?
620
00:21:25,473 --> 00:21:27,007
Barry, maybe you
just need to walk.
621
00:21:27,040 --> 00:21:29,510
Are you a crazy person?
My apartment's like
a mile from here.
47754
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