Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,290 --> 00:00:03,658
ADULT ADAM: Back in the '80s,
National Lampoon's Vacation
2
00:00:03,692 --> 00:00:06,295
was the best
road-trip comedy ever.
3
00:00:06,328 --> 00:00:08,797
Yep, the Griswold family
tore across America,
4
00:00:08,830 --> 00:00:11,200
and no one loved it
more than my mom.
5
00:00:11,233 --> 00:00:14,736
Yes! This movie has everything
I love and deserve!
6
00:00:14,769 --> 00:00:16,971
So pack your bags
so I can unpack them
7
00:00:17,005 --> 00:00:19,007
and then repack them
again properly
8
00:00:19,040 --> 00:00:22,477
because the Goldbergs
are going on vacation!
9
00:00:22,511 --> 00:00:23,712
I don't know, Mom.
10
00:00:23,745 --> 00:00:26,148
That family's trip
seemed super stressful
and difficult.
11
00:00:26,181 --> 00:00:27,549
And they
like each other.
12
00:00:27,582 --> 00:00:29,050
But we have one week left
13
00:00:29,084 --> 00:00:31,620
before Barry and Erica
jet off to college.
14
00:00:31,653 --> 00:00:32,787
It's 10 minutes away.
15
00:00:32,821 --> 00:00:33,988
On nice days,
I might walk.
16
00:00:34,022 --> 00:00:36,958
And Adam's starting life
as a high-school
upperclassman.
17
00:00:36,991 --> 00:00:38,493
Now when the juniors
throw food at me...
18
00:00:38,527 --> 00:00:40,195
(SNIFFS)
...they'll be my peers.
19
00:00:40,229 --> 00:00:42,397
Such a dork.
You shame us daily.
20
00:00:42,431 --> 00:00:45,967
So we're gonna take one last
unforgettable family vacation
21
00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:48,837
before everybody starts
the next big chapter
in their lives!
22
00:00:48,870 --> 00:00:50,004
What do you say?
23
00:00:50,038 --> 00:00:51,740
We love you,
but pass.
24
00:00:51,773 --> 00:00:54,843
You're gonna pass
on a trip to Disneyland?
25
00:00:54,876 --> 00:00:57,212
Oh, balls!
I love you now!
26
00:00:57,246 --> 00:00:59,214
Ah, that's right!
Embrace your mama!
27
00:00:59,248 --> 00:01:00,915
Star Wars just opened
a ride there!
28
00:01:00,949 --> 00:01:02,184
It's called "Star Tours"!
29
00:01:02,217 --> 00:01:04,153
You get to travel
to the forest moon
of Endor!
30
00:01:04,186 --> 00:01:06,521
Well, I "Endor" you.
Boop!
31
00:01:06,555 --> 00:01:08,257
Even you can't ruin this.
32
00:01:08,290 --> 00:01:11,160
Star Wars teaming up with
Disney is just so big!
33
00:01:11,193 --> 00:01:13,562
Sure, I wish they'd dedicate
a whole land to Star Wars,
34
00:01:13,595 --> 00:01:15,564
but that's just
a little boy's dream!
35
00:01:15,597 --> 00:01:17,566
(LAUGHS) Barry?
36
00:01:17,599 --> 00:01:20,369
Wanna give mama a huggy
'cause she's
the best in the game?
37
00:01:20,402 --> 00:01:22,171
I'm not going
to Disneyland!
38
00:01:22,204 --> 00:01:24,606
I'm a grown adult man
who will be starting
39
00:01:24,639 --> 00:01:26,875
a fully accredited
university in a week.
40
00:01:26,908 --> 00:01:28,777
But you love
that Snow White.
41
00:01:28,810 --> 00:01:31,045
You've had a crush on her
since you could talk.
42
00:01:31,079 --> 00:01:32,514
Which was late
for your age.
43
00:01:32,547 --> 00:01:33,715
But still.
44
00:01:33,748 --> 00:01:35,150
Sure, Ms. White
has pretty hair
45
00:01:35,184 --> 00:01:37,051
and she's patient
with those dwarves
46
00:01:37,085 --> 00:01:38,620
in a way you know
you'd just vibe with her,
47
00:01:38,653 --> 00:01:39,954
but not at all!
48
00:01:39,988 --> 00:01:41,089
Who cares!
49
00:01:41,122 --> 00:01:42,924
I can't believe
we're flying to California!
50
00:01:42,957 --> 00:01:44,926
Oh, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no!
51
00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:46,628
That won't
give me enough time
52
00:01:46,661 --> 00:01:48,129
squished together
with my squishies.
53
00:01:48,163 --> 00:01:49,864
(CHUCKLES)
We're driving!
54
00:01:49,898 --> 00:01:52,167
To the airport
and then we're flying?
55
00:01:52,201 --> 00:01:53,568
When will I learn
not to hug
56
00:01:53,602 --> 00:01:55,404
until I hear
all of the details?
57
00:01:55,437 --> 00:01:57,772
It'll be just like
the Griswolds.
We're gonna see America!
58
00:01:57,806 --> 00:01:59,741
This America?
I've seen it.
59
00:01:59,774 --> 00:02:01,276
It's all corn.
60
00:02:01,310 --> 00:02:04,779
Look, I just finished
following the Grateful Dead
in a van with Geoff.
61
00:02:04,813 --> 00:02:06,781
I'm not
going back out there.
Me neither!
62
00:02:06,815 --> 00:02:08,783
If you don't,
I won't pay for college.
63
00:02:08,817 --> 00:02:10,151
Yay, everyone's in!
64
00:02:10,185 --> 00:02:11,420
What's all the noise?
65
00:02:11,453 --> 00:02:13,555
I can barely hear myself
eat my creme cookies.
66
00:02:13,588 --> 00:02:15,224
We're driving
to Disneyland!
67
00:02:15,257 --> 00:02:17,226
I get the feeling
I don't have a say in this.
68
00:02:17,259 --> 00:02:19,127
Hmm, I get that
feeling, too! Yay!
69
00:02:19,160 --> 00:02:20,295
Why did I come in here?
70
00:02:20,329 --> 00:02:21,830
And I got a Polaroid
71
00:02:21,863 --> 00:02:23,398
so I can take a photo diary
of our trip!
72
00:02:23,432 --> 00:02:24,466
Come on,
squeeze together.
73
00:02:24,499 --> 00:02:25,967
I don't want
to be near your dad.
74
00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,436
He smells like
coffee and onions.
75
00:02:27,469 --> 00:02:30,305
BEVERLY: Squeeze in.
You ain't exactly cinnamon
and sugar, sweetheart.
76
00:02:30,339 --> 00:02:32,274
I don't know
where my body ends
and Adam's begins.
77
00:02:32,307 --> 00:02:34,443
This trip is already
the worst thing that's
ever happened to me!
78
00:02:34,476 --> 00:02:35,977
Just take
the damn picture!
79
00:02:36,010 --> 00:02:41,483
* Holiday ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-ad *
80
00:02:41,516 --> 00:02:44,152
ADULT ADAM: It was
the last week of summer,
1980-something,
81
00:02:44,185 --> 00:02:45,854
and the Goldbergs
were about to hit the road.
82
00:02:45,887 --> 00:02:48,523
Of course that meant my dad
was excited about one thing,
83
00:02:48,557 --> 00:02:49,758
saving money.
84
00:02:49,791 --> 00:02:51,125
Lose the bathrobe.
85
00:02:51,159 --> 00:02:54,929
It's a traditional Jedi cloak
revered the galaxy over.
86
00:02:54,963 --> 00:02:57,299
Well, I'd revere
a tank top
if I were you,
87
00:02:57,332 --> 00:02:59,434
because I'm not using
the air conditioning.
88
00:02:59,468 --> 00:03:01,503
You're not cheaping out
on this trip, Murray.
89
00:03:01,536 --> 00:03:02,971
We have
to make it perfect
90
00:03:03,004 --> 00:03:04,606
so that no matter
how old they get
91
00:03:04,639 --> 00:03:06,140
or where
they are in the world,
92
00:03:06,174 --> 00:03:08,042
they'll want to do this
for years to come.
93
00:03:08,076 --> 00:03:09,678
An annual trip?
94
00:03:09,711 --> 00:03:11,313
I was just sitting,
enjoying my cookies.
95
00:03:11,346 --> 00:03:13,214
Now our financial future
is in doubt?
96
00:03:13,248 --> 00:03:14,716
Good news, everyone!
97
00:03:14,749 --> 00:03:16,451
I'm bringing my banjo.
98
00:03:16,485 --> 00:03:18,052
No.
Roger that.
99
00:03:18,086 --> 00:03:20,622
Attention,
uneducated masses!
100
00:03:20,655 --> 00:03:21,956
As you all know,
101
00:03:21,990 --> 00:03:23,692
I'll be attending college
in a week,
102
00:03:23,725 --> 00:03:25,494
so I need to be
in tip-top shape...
103
00:03:25,527 --> 00:03:26,895
Mind and body.
104
00:03:26,928 --> 00:03:28,196
Is that why you're holding
105
00:03:28,229 --> 00:03:30,399
your mom's
titanium leg pretzel?
106
00:03:30,432 --> 00:03:32,066
This thigh-blasting
machine
107
00:03:32,100 --> 00:03:33,868
is my ticket
to physical dominance.
108
00:03:33,902 --> 00:03:35,704
Just do your dumb thing
in the car.
109
00:03:35,737 --> 00:03:37,171
Where's your sister?
We got to get going.
110
00:03:37,205 --> 00:03:38,540
Saying goodbye
to her boyfriend.
111
00:03:38,573 --> 00:03:39,841
You really
don't want to come
112
00:03:39,874 --> 00:03:42,377
and be jammed
in a station wagon
with my family for a week?
113
00:03:42,411 --> 00:03:43,712
And I answered
my own question.
114
00:03:43,745 --> 00:03:44,913
Look, I'll be
on the road, too.
115
00:03:44,946 --> 00:03:46,815
The Dead have
four more concerts
left this summer.
116
00:03:46,848 --> 00:03:48,583
I'm hoping by the last one,
I finally like them.
117
00:03:48,617 --> 00:03:50,752
(HORN HONKS)
Erica! Let's go!
118
00:03:50,785 --> 00:03:52,321
(ENGINE STARTS)
Um...
119
00:03:52,354 --> 00:03:54,689
One more thing,
we need to talk.
120
00:03:54,723 --> 00:03:55,757
Oh? What is it?
121
00:03:55,790 --> 00:03:56,858
(HORN HONKS)
Erica!
122
00:03:56,891 --> 00:03:57,926
Gas is burning!
123
00:03:57,959 --> 00:03:59,060
You know what?
It's nothing.
124
00:03:59,093 --> 00:04:00,495
It... It can wait until
after your trip.
125
00:04:00,529 --> 00:04:02,531
I don't want to spoil it.
(HONKING CONTINUES)
126
00:04:02,564 --> 00:04:04,899
I better get moving, too.
B-bye!
127
00:04:04,933 --> 00:04:06,668
Erica!
128
00:04:06,701 --> 00:04:08,002
(TIRES SCREECH)
BEVERLY: We're doing it!
129
00:04:08,036 --> 00:04:10,071
The Goldbergs
are going on vacation!
130
00:04:10,104 --> 00:04:12,774
* I found out long ago *
131
00:04:12,807 --> 00:04:15,209
(SONG SLOWS, STOPS)
132
00:04:15,243 --> 00:04:17,011
BARRY: (CHUCKLES)
We couldn't even leave!
133
00:04:17,045 --> 00:04:18,747
ADULT ADAM:
But eventually we did.
134
00:04:18,780 --> 00:04:20,949
And once we hit the highway,
it was smooth sailing.
135
00:04:20,982 --> 00:04:23,785
Of course, there were
some bumps inside the car.
136
00:04:23,818 --> 00:04:25,887
Gah! You keep
smashing into me!
Stop it!
137
00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:27,556
No can do, Ad-Rock.
138
00:04:27,589 --> 00:04:30,191
And be warned,
as my muscles grow,
expand,
139
00:04:30,224 --> 00:04:32,461
and explode outward,
I'll need more space.
140
00:04:32,494 --> 00:04:34,128
Why do I always have
to sit in the middle?
141
00:04:34,162 --> 00:04:35,864
'Cause windows
are for college men,
142
00:04:35,897 --> 00:04:37,231
not high school losers!
143
00:04:37,265 --> 00:04:39,300
Yeah, you keep
calling yourself
a college man,
144
00:04:39,334 --> 00:04:41,570
but come next week,
you're in for
a rude awakening.
145
00:04:41,603 --> 00:04:42,704
What's that
supposed to mean?
146
00:04:42,737 --> 00:04:44,473
It means you might be
in college,
147
00:04:44,506 --> 00:04:46,274
but you're just gonna be
a lowly freshman,
148
00:04:46,307 --> 00:04:48,242
totally starting
from scratch socially.
149
00:04:48,276 --> 00:04:50,779
Have you not seen
the work I've been
doing on my thighs?
150
00:04:50,812 --> 00:04:52,046
College is gonna love me.
151
00:04:52,080 --> 00:04:54,583
Or the safety of
the only world
you've known
152
00:04:54,616 --> 00:04:55,650
will have vanished,
153
00:04:55,684 --> 00:04:57,552
and you'll discover
that there's no place
154
00:04:57,586 --> 00:05:00,655
for an emotionally
out-of-control doof
with a thigh device.
155
00:05:00,689 --> 00:05:02,957
What?
I am not an emotionally
out-of-control doof!
156
00:05:02,991 --> 00:05:04,058
You are!
157
00:05:04,092 --> 00:05:05,660
Adam, quit working
your brother up.
158
00:05:05,694 --> 00:05:06,895
He's gonna
strain his groin.
159
00:05:06,928 --> 00:05:08,963
Erica, switch seats
with me, please.
160
00:05:08,997 --> 00:05:11,800
Hey, if a guy says
he needs to talk,
is that bad?
161
00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:13,802
Ooh.
Is that a good "ooh"?
162
00:05:13,835 --> 00:05:15,637
Uh.
Is that a good "uh"?
163
00:05:15,670 --> 00:05:16,971
You and Geoff
are toast!
164
00:05:17,005 --> 00:05:19,408
And not good toast
with tons of marmalade
and butter.
165
00:05:19,441 --> 00:05:21,843
Bad toast that's burnt
and breaking up with you.
166
00:05:21,876 --> 00:05:23,778
He's not
breaking up with me!
167
00:05:23,812 --> 00:05:25,480
He just got real serious,
168
00:05:25,514 --> 00:05:27,315
and then said he didn't
want to ruin my vacation
169
00:05:27,348 --> 00:05:29,418
by telling me something
and sped off and...
170
00:05:29,451 --> 00:05:30,919
Oh, my God, Geoff's
breaking up with me!
171
00:05:30,952 --> 00:05:31,986
You should call him.
172
00:05:32,020 --> 00:05:33,287
How?
He's on the road, too!
173
00:05:33,321 --> 00:05:34,989
I guess you just
won't know for a week.
174
00:05:35,023 --> 00:05:36,791
But hey,
look on the bright side...
175
00:05:36,825 --> 00:05:37,926
Star Wars.
176
00:05:37,959 --> 00:05:38,993
Yeah, that sounds fun
177
00:05:39,027 --> 00:05:41,696
and so much more important
than my relationship!
178
00:05:41,730 --> 00:05:42,964
BEVERLY:
You know what's fun?
179
00:05:42,997 --> 00:05:44,499
A sing-along!
(ERICA GROANS)
180
00:05:44,533 --> 00:05:45,667
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, come on!
181
00:05:45,700 --> 00:05:47,802
I'll start us all off.
182
00:05:47,836 --> 00:05:49,504
* Row, row, row your boat
183
00:05:49,538 --> 00:05:51,139
* Gently down the stream
184
00:05:51,172 --> 00:05:52,206
Jump in!
185
00:05:52,240 --> 00:05:54,008
* Merrily, merrily,
merrily, merrily
186
00:05:54,042 --> 00:05:55,143
* Life is but a dream
187
00:05:55,176 --> 00:05:56,210
Anyone now!
188
00:05:56,244 --> 00:05:58,179
* Row, row, row your boat
189
00:05:58,212 --> 00:05:59,681
* Gently down the stream
190
00:05:59,714 --> 00:06:00,949
There's your cue!
191
00:06:00,982 --> 00:06:02,517
* Merrily, merrily,
merrily, merrily
192
00:06:02,551 --> 00:06:03,618
* Life is but a dream
193
00:06:03,652 --> 00:06:04,686
Make it yours.
194
00:06:04,719 --> 00:06:06,621
* Row, row,
row your boat
195
00:06:06,655 --> 00:06:08,022
* Gently down the stream
196
00:06:08,056 --> 00:06:09,123
Just the girls!
197
00:06:09,157 --> 00:06:11,125
* Merrily, merrily,
merrily, merrily
198
00:06:11,159 --> 00:06:15,464
* Life is but a dre-e-e-am *
199
00:06:15,497 --> 00:06:17,165
(LAUGHS)
200
00:06:17,198 --> 00:06:18,467
That was great!
201
00:06:18,500 --> 00:06:21,836
ADULT ADAM: Yep,
our vacation was off
to a slow start.
202
00:06:21,870 --> 00:06:23,638
But somewhere
along the open road,
203
00:06:23,672 --> 00:06:26,074
things were about
to kick into high gear.
204
00:06:26,107 --> 00:06:28,142
What the hell
is this nut job doing?
205
00:06:28,176 --> 00:06:30,411
Hey! Go around!
206
00:06:30,445 --> 00:06:32,847
I think she's flirting
with you, Murray.
207
00:06:32,881 --> 00:06:35,149
Whoa, it's just like
in the movie!
208
00:06:35,183 --> 00:06:36,384
But when you see it
in real life,
209
00:06:36,417 --> 00:06:37,819
it just comes off
as wildly reckless!
210
00:06:39,087 --> 00:06:40,822
You're being
very aggressive!
211
00:06:40,855 --> 00:06:42,190
He's spoken for!
212
00:06:42,223 --> 00:06:43,257
Show her
your wedding ring!
213
00:06:43,291 --> 00:06:45,259
I think
she's eyeballing me.
214
00:06:45,293 --> 00:06:46,595
Move your melon, Murray,
215
00:06:46,628 --> 00:06:49,097
so I can enchant her
with a coy wink.
216
00:06:49,130 --> 00:06:50,231
This can't be real.
217
00:06:51,733 --> 00:06:53,234
Oh, it's real, all right.
218
00:06:53,267 --> 00:06:55,904
My fruit guy's nephew
was seduced by a road hussy
219
00:06:55,937 --> 00:06:57,506
and he woke up in a bathtub
220
00:06:57,539 --> 00:07:00,408
missing his kidney, spleen,
corneas, and rectum.
221
00:07:00,441 --> 00:07:02,110
There are road hussies?
222
00:07:02,143 --> 00:07:03,512
Geoff's on the road!
223
00:07:03,545 --> 00:07:04,579
And single.
224
00:07:04,613 --> 00:07:05,780
We don't know that!
225
00:07:05,814 --> 00:07:08,249
(ENGINE REVS)
226
00:07:08,282 --> 00:07:10,552
ADULT ADAM: As Pops'
blonde beauty sped away,
227
00:07:10,585 --> 00:07:12,453
we headed towards
our first pit stop,
228
00:07:12,487 --> 00:07:14,055
the Old West.
229
00:07:14,088 --> 00:07:17,526
See, back in 1980-something,
it was 1880-something.
230
00:07:17,559 --> 00:07:20,028
Would you look
at this place?
231
00:07:20,061 --> 00:07:22,130
It's like
stepping back in time!
232
00:07:22,163 --> 00:07:24,566
The hotel room prices
are certainly up-to-date.
233
00:07:24,599 --> 00:07:25,934
SHERIFF: Howdy, folks.
234
00:07:25,967 --> 00:07:29,538
Welcome to Durango Gulch,
population 237.
235
00:07:29,571 --> 00:07:31,139
Oops.
236
00:07:31,172 --> 00:07:33,041
Looks like 236.
237
00:07:33,074 --> 00:07:34,576
Funny stuff,
Quick Draw McGraw.
238
00:07:34,609 --> 00:07:36,110
But, um,
where's the pay phones?
239
00:07:36,144 --> 00:07:37,946
It's the 19th century,
ma'am.
240
00:07:37,979 --> 00:07:41,249
I don't reckon to know
what hifalutin contraption
you're speaking about.
241
00:07:41,282 --> 00:07:43,585
Okay, so you're just gonna
keep doing the thing?
242
00:07:43,618 --> 00:07:45,319
Great.
I'll be in the saloon.
243
00:07:45,353 --> 00:07:46,955
(GRUNTING)
244
00:07:46,988 --> 00:07:49,290
Ooh, looks like we got
a real cowboy here.
245
00:07:49,323 --> 00:07:50,825
You just step
off the trail,
pardner?
246
00:07:50,859 --> 00:07:52,894
I'm walking like this
because I blasted my thighs
247
00:07:52,927 --> 00:07:54,996
with unbridled intensity
for 300 miles.
248
00:07:55,029 --> 00:07:56,464
How would
you two little wranglers
249
00:07:56,497 --> 00:07:58,132
like to be my deputies?
250
00:07:58,166 --> 00:07:59,400
(BADGE CLATTERS)
251
00:07:59,433 --> 00:08:01,402
"Little wrangler"?
252
00:08:01,435 --> 00:08:04,305
I'm a man who could grow
twice the mustache you have
253
00:08:04,338 --> 00:08:06,140
except then
you'd be humiliated,
254
00:08:06,174 --> 00:08:07,241
and I'd become sheriff,
255
00:08:07,275 --> 00:08:09,010
and I don't want
that responsibility.
256
00:08:09,944 --> 00:08:12,346
Ohh... Ow, ow. Ohh.
257
00:08:12,380 --> 00:08:15,516
Not cool, man!
Not cool!
258
00:08:15,550 --> 00:08:18,152
Yeah, I don't think
he totally gets
what this place is.
259
00:08:19,688 --> 00:08:21,489
There's no way
he's breaking up with me.
260
00:08:21,522 --> 00:08:23,692
I mean, look at me.
I'm a catch.
261
00:08:23,725 --> 00:08:25,694
I guess
I am a little bossy,
262
00:08:25,727 --> 00:08:27,128
but what man
doesn't like that?
263
00:08:28,997 --> 00:08:30,932
Damn it!
He's so leaving me!
264
00:08:30,965 --> 00:08:32,000
Love isn't real!
265
00:08:32,033 --> 00:08:33,434
Neither is your ID.
266
00:08:33,467 --> 00:08:34,869
Oh, sure,
you don't have phones,
267
00:08:34,903 --> 00:08:36,671
but you check
my fake driver's license?
268
00:08:36,705 --> 00:08:37,772
Pick a century!
269
00:08:41,409 --> 00:08:43,845
Yo, wanna go ride
a dead-eyed mule in a circle?
270
00:08:43,878 --> 00:08:45,213
It's super sad!
271
00:08:45,246 --> 00:08:48,082
No! I'm not going on
some dumb kid's ride.
Just leave me alone.
272
00:08:48,116 --> 00:08:50,585
Are you really still upset
that I accurately suggested
273
00:08:50,619 --> 00:08:52,754
you're not ready for the next
major step in your life?
274
00:08:52,787 --> 00:08:56,190
Please, your devastating words
had no effect on me.
275
00:08:56,224 --> 00:08:57,659
I know I'm a man!
276
00:08:57,692 --> 00:09:00,028
(ALL WHOOPING)
277
00:09:00,061 --> 00:09:01,663
SHERIFF: Oh, no!
278
00:09:01,696 --> 00:09:04,032
Bandits have surrounded
the stagecoach!
279
00:09:04,065 --> 00:09:05,133
And I'm gonna prove it!
280
00:09:05,166 --> 00:09:07,001
Is there
one man brave enough
281
00:09:07,035 --> 00:09:09,871
to stop these banditos
with this here lasso?
282
00:09:09,904 --> 00:09:13,041
I am that one man,
Fake Sheriff.
283
00:09:13,074 --> 00:09:14,809
You know your way
around a rope, son?
284
00:09:14,843 --> 00:09:16,077
Of course I know ropes.
285
00:09:16,110 --> 00:09:18,346
I've played tug-of-war
and the board game Clue...
286
00:09:18,379 --> 00:09:21,049
But we lost that piece,
so we use an old checker.
287
00:09:21,082 --> 00:09:24,218
Now just swing this thing
in a slow circular pattern.
288
00:09:25,586 --> 00:09:26,655
Yah!
289
00:09:26,688 --> 00:09:28,389
Yah!
290
00:09:28,422 --> 00:09:29,490
Yah!
291
00:09:29,523 --> 00:09:31,192
Yah! Yah!
292
00:09:31,225 --> 00:09:33,194
(GLASS SHATTERS)
293
00:09:33,227 --> 00:09:35,396
Is that one of those
cheap plate-glass windows
294
00:09:35,429 --> 00:09:36,865
that cowboys are always
crashing through?
295
00:09:36,898 --> 00:09:38,066
It is not.
296
00:09:39,868 --> 00:09:41,235
MURRAY: Morons!
297
00:09:41,269 --> 00:09:44,505
I mean, who gets kicked
out of an imaginary
Western town?
298
00:09:44,538 --> 00:09:46,340
Those rooms
were non-refundable!
299
00:09:46,374 --> 00:09:47,642
Well,
this is just perfect.
300
00:09:47,676 --> 00:09:49,243
Where are we supposed
to stay tonight?
301
00:09:49,277 --> 00:09:51,345
Don't you worry
about me.
302
00:09:55,784 --> 00:09:57,919
Hey, Al.
Ready to go?
303
00:09:57,952 --> 00:09:59,387
You know it, sweetie.
304
00:10:00,188 --> 00:10:01,856
I'm gonna miss you guys.
305
00:10:01,890 --> 00:10:03,692
You know,
you're welcome to stay.
306
00:10:03,725 --> 00:10:05,894
I... I'm being polite.
Punch it!
307
00:10:05,927 --> 00:10:07,561
(TIRES SQUEAL)
308
00:10:07,996 --> 00:10:09,130
BEVERLY: Okay.
309
00:10:09,163 --> 00:10:10,965
We're still together mostly.
310
00:10:10,999 --> 00:10:13,267
Don't worry,
I've already thought of
311
00:10:13,301 --> 00:10:15,103
a cheap, available place
for us to sleep.
312
00:10:15,136 --> 00:10:17,972
ADULT ADAM:
That night, our hotel
didn't have four stars.
313
00:10:18,006 --> 00:10:19,140
It had four wheels.
314
00:10:19,173 --> 00:10:20,809
Stop fluffing me,
I'm not a pillow!
315
00:10:20,842 --> 00:10:21,910
Then get softer!
316
00:10:21,943 --> 00:10:24,045
Will you two dopes
shut up?
317
00:10:24,078 --> 00:10:26,815
My God, this trip sucks.
318
00:10:26,848 --> 00:10:28,616
At least it's the last one
we'll ever take together.
319
00:10:28,649 --> 00:10:31,786
Until Mom forces us
to do this all again
next year.
320
00:10:31,820 --> 00:10:34,622
Dummy, we're going off
to college.
321
00:10:34,655 --> 00:10:37,058
We're not doing
this again. Ever.
322
00:10:37,091 --> 00:10:39,293
ERICA: Yeah, we're
not just moving out.
323
00:10:39,327 --> 00:10:41,229
We're moving on
for good.
324
00:10:41,262 --> 00:10:43,297
ADULT ADAM: In that moment,
I realized our family
325
00:10:43,331 --> 00:10:45,299
was truly going
their separate ways.
326
00:10:45,333 --> 00:10:47,601
No more crazy adventures
with my brother or sister.
327
00:10:47,635 --> 00:10:49,270
And no more middle seat.
328
00:10:49,303 --> 00:10:50,638
I'm okay with it.
329
00:10:50,671 --> 00:10:53,207
But there was one person
who would never be
okay with it.
330
00:10:55,676 --> 00:10:58,112
ADULT ADAM:
Our family vacation was still
on track for Disneyland,
331
00:10:58,146 --> 00:11:00,448
but my mom's mind
was on a different path.
332
00:11:00,481 --> 00:11:02,116
Murray, the kids aren't
gonna go away to college
333
00:11:02,150 --> 00:11:04,352
and never come back,
right?
I dunno.
334
00:11:04,385 --> 00:11:06,120
Sure they're growing up,
but they love us
335
00:11:06,154 --> 00:11:08,757
and want to stay
in our lives forever!
I dunno.
336
00:11:08,790 --> 00:11:11,025
My children will spend
every summer with me
337
00:11:11,059 --> 00:11:12,626
until the day I die!
(MUMBLES)
338
00:11:12,660 --> 00:11:14,162
And even then,
they're gonna carry my urn
339
00:11:14,195 --> 00:11:15,930
on every vacation
they ever take.
340
00:11:15,964 --> 00:11:18,132
Of course!
Well, you're finally
agreeing with me?
341
00:11:18,166 --> 00:11:20,134
Of course
they're screwing me
at the pump!
342
00:11:20,168 --> 00:11:22,170
$9 to fill up a tank?
343
00:11:22,203 --> 00:11:25,539
Our babies are choosing
to de-latch
from our collective bosom
344
00:11:25,573 --> 00:11:28,176
and all you care about
is gas mileage!
345
00:11:28,209 --> 00:11:29,443
What do you want from me?
346
00:11:29,477 --> 00:11:31,145
I don't know
what those morons
are gonna do.
347
00:11:31,179 --> 00:11:32,546
But I do know
they're here now,
348
00:11:32,580 --> 00:11:35,383
so let's, uh, drive around
or, uh, whatever.
349
00:11:35,416 --> 00:11:36,517
That's right!
350
00:11:36,550 --> 00:11:37,986
They're with us now!
351
00:11:38,019 --> 00:11:40,121
So if we make this trip
extra special,
352
00:11:40,154 --> 00:11:41,856
they're gonna want
to come back for more!
353
00:11:41,890 --> 00:11:43,591
(GASPS)
Yeah, I dunno.
354
00:11:43,624 --> 00:11:46,027
ADULT ADAM: As my mom
was trying to keep
her family together,
355
00:11:46,060 --> 00:11:49,230
my sister was trying
to keep her relationship
from falling apart.
356
00:11:49,263 --> 00:11:50,965
Hey, Geoff, it's Erica.
357
00:11:50,999 --> 00:11:54,302
Just checking in to see
what you meant by,
"We need to talk."
358
00:11:54,335 --> 00:11:57,371
Probably just wanted to say
how we have no problems
359
00:11:57,405 --> 00:11:59,140
and we're a perfect couple.
360
00:11:59,173 --> 00:12:01,876
Okay, well, have fun
on the road, bye!
361
00:12:01,910 --> 00:12:04,678
Unfortunately, she couldn't
leave just one message.
362
00:12:04,712 --> 00:12:07,081
Here's what
"We need to talk"
means to me.
363
00:12:07,115 --> 00:12:08,582
It means
we have a problem.
364
00:12:08,616 --> 00:12:09,884
So is... Is it me?
365
00:12:09,918 --> 00:12:11,252
You're the problem, Geoff!
366
00:12:11,285 --> 00:12:12,854
Maybe I don't want you!
367
00:12:12,887 --> 00:12:14,588
Come back to me,
my widdle Geoffy-weffy.
368
00:12:14,622 --> 00:12:15,689
You're a butt!
369
00:12:15,723 --> 00:12:17,491
And not just
the tiny part of the butt,
370
00:12:17,525 --> 00:12:18,559
but the whole mound.
371
00:12:18,592 --> 00:12:21,129
The cheeks,
the smelly region,
all of it.
372
00:12:22,463 --> 00:12:24,332
Okey-doke.
I think I got it.
373
00:12:24,365 --> 00:12:25,399
Thanks, Dr. Schwartz.
374
00:12:25,433 --> 00:12:26,567
Oh, I almost forgot.
375
00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:28,502
Geoffrey called and passed on
a message of his own.
376
00:12:28,536 --> 00:12:29,570
What did he say?
377
00:12:29,603 --> 00:12:32,006
He said he needs
to tell you
in person,
378
00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:34,342
but it's big
and possibly upsetting.
379
00:12:34,375 --> 00:12:36,444
That doesn't help at all.
It just makes
everything worse!
380
00:12:36,477 --> 00:12:37,778
Sure thing, honey.
Bye now.
381
00:12:39,814 --> 00:12:41,215
Why didn't you
get a slushie?
382
00:12:41,249 --> 00:12:42,750
They had your favorite...
Blue.
383
00:12:42,783 --> 00:12:45,386
Real men don't drink
that delicious crap.
384
00:12:45,419 --> 00:12:46,855
They drink
boiling-hot coffee.
385
00:12:46,888 --> 00:12:48,256
But you hate coffee.
386
00:12:48,289 --> 00:12:50,224
That was Yesterday Barry.
387
00:12:50,258 --> 00:12:52,894
But now my taste buds
and skittish tummy
have matured.
388
00:12:55,129 --> 00:12:57,031
How could you put this
in your body?
389
00:12:57,065 --> 00:12:59,033
Ugh!
390
00:12:59,067 --> 00:13:00,401
I love it.
391
00:13:00,434 --> 00:13:03,537
Okay, Bar,
clearly I freaked you out
about starting college...
392
00:13:03,571 --> 00:13:04,772
I'm not freaked out!
393
00:13:04,805 --> 00:13:06,107
If anything,
I'm freaked in!
394
00:13:06,140 --> 00:13:08,442
That doesn't mean anything.
You don't mean anything!
395
00:13:08,476 --> 00:13:10,544
You're a tiny boy
who doesn't know
the struggles
396
00:13:10,578 --> 00:13:13,047
of a fully grown
college gentleman!
397
00:13:13,081 --> 00:13:14,916
(GULPING)
398
00:13:14,949 --> 00:13:15,984
Hot! Hot!
399
00:13:18,786 --> 00:13:20,421
This is hard to watch.
400
00:13:20,454 --> 00:13:22,857
But the good news is
we'll be in Anaheim
in two days.
401
00:13:22,891 --> 00:13:24,258
Change of plans!
402
00:13:24,292 --> 00:13:27,428
I've got a surefire way
to make sure everybody
loves this vacation...
403
00:13:27,461 --> 00:13:29,397
Make it way longer!
404
00:13:29,430 --> 00:13:30,664
Oh, balls.
405
00:13:30,698 --> 00:13:33,902
We are gonna hit
every major attraction
from here to California.
406
00:13:33,935 --> 00:13:35,069
But that'll
take forever.
407
00:13:35,103 --> 00:13:36,504
What about
my "Star Tours" ride?
408
00:13:36,537 --> 00:13:39,740
Schmoopie,
it's about the journey,
not the destination.
409
00:13:39,773 --> 00:13:42,143
Ha! You have
to appreciate
the journey!
410
00:13:42,176 --> 00:13:44,913
Ah, see?
Barry's excited!
Who else?
411
00:13:44,946 --> 00:13:47,315
Might as well,
my relationship
is probably over.
412
00:13:47,348 --> 00:13:49,317
See? Another
one of my babies
didn't say no!
413
00:13:49,350 --> 00:13:50,384
Murray?
414
00:13:50,418 --> 00:13:51,920
I don't care what we do,
as long as it's free.
415
00:13:51,953 --> 00:13:53,021
Ah! See?
416
00:13:53,054 --> 00:13:56,090
Everyone's in and happy
and we're making memories,
417
00:13:56,124 --> 00:13:58,726
and this is gonna be the best
Goldbergs vacation ever!
418
00:13:58,759 --> 00:14:00,028
(LAUGHS)
419
00:14:00,061 --> 00:14:01,996
Say, "Cheese"!
420
00:14:02,030 --> 00:14:04,532
ADULT ADAM:
And so we saw America.
421
00:14:04,565 --> 00:14:07,135
In all its weird
and magnificent glory.
422
00:14:07,168 --> 00:14:09,237
There were sculptures
made of cars,
423
00:14:09,270 --> 00:14:11,139
mountains made of faces,
424
00:14:11,172 --> 00:14:13,341
one big hole.
425
00:14:13,374 --> 00:14:15,143
But what took
our breath away the most
426
00:14:15,176 --> 00:14:18,112
was the crappy motel our dad
insisted staying at.
427
00:14:18,146 --> 00:14:20,614
This is the kind of motel
where people live full-time.
428
00:14:20,648 --> 00:14:21,849
Uh, it's gross.
429
00:14:21,882 --> 00:14:23,151
It's cozy.
430
00:14:23,184 --> 00:14:24,818
There's police tape
around the pool.
431
00:14:24,852 --> 00:14:28,356
That shows the police
have already been here.
So it's safe.
432
00:14:28,389 --> 00:14:30,524
Look! They got one
of those Magic Fingers
bed massagers.
433
00:14:30,558 --> 00:14:31,625
BEVERLY: No!
434
00:14:31,659 --> 00:14:33,327
Nobody touch anything
435
00:14:33,361 --> 00:14:35,329
until I hit it with
some Lysol Pine action.
436
00:14:35,363 --> 00:14:36,664
I'm turning it on!
437
00:14:36,697 --> 00:14:39,000
My thighs and tummy muscles
are still sore!
438
00:14:40,401 --> 00:14:43,237
(SIGHS) Let's soothe
my aching bones!
439
00:14:43,271 --> 00:14:44,505
(BED VIBRATING)
440
00:14:44,538 --> 00:14:47,008
(VIBRATING INTENSIFIES)
Lemme turn it down.
441
00:14:48,609 --> 00:14:50,044
Damn it, moron!
442
00:14:50,078 --> 00:14:51,479
They don't have
any more rooms!
443
00:14:51,512 --> 00:14:53,714
What do you do
with these things?
444
00:14:53,747 --> 00:14:56,350
I've got a super fun idea
that solves everything!
445
00:14:57,885 --> 00:14:59,620
Who can sleep like this?
446
00:14:59,653 --> 00:15:02,256
ADULT ADAM: Yeah,
we barely slept a wink
that night.
447
00:15:02,290 --> 00:15:03,924
And we were so exhausted
the next morning,
448
00:15:03,958 --> 00:15:05,759
everyone passed out
in the car.
449
00:15:05,793 --> 00:15:07,195
And I mean everyone.
450
00:15:11,432 --> 00:15:13,467
(ALL SCREAMING)
451
00:15:24,145 --> 00:15:27,081
(BREATHING SHALLOWLY)
452
00:15:27,115 --> 00:15:29,583
Do you think this will
affect our time at Disneyland?
453
00:15:31,652 --> 00:15:33,954
Barry,
this is all your fault!
454
00:15:33,988 --> 00:15:35,723
You and your stupid
bed massager.
455
00:15:35,756 --> 00:15:38,092
I know! I'm not a man!
456
00:15:38,126 --> 00:15:41,295
I'm starting college,
but the truth is
I still feel like a boy.
457
00:15:41,329 --> 00:15:42,896
Like sad, pathetic
little Adam here.
458
00:15:42,930 --> 00:15:43,964
Hey!
459
00:15:43,998 --> 00:15:45,133
Will you shut up?
460
00:15:45,166 --> 00:15:46,300
I mean, look at this!
461
00:15:46,334 --> 00:15:48,402
Now I'll never
get to a phone
and learn the truth
462
00:15:48,436 --> 00:15:49,837
that I definitely
don't wanna know!
463
00:15:49,870 --> 00:15:50,971
My God!
464
00:15:51,005 --> 00:15:53,074
You're both
just selfish jerks!
465
00:15:53,107 --> 00:15:54,242
You know,
I actually thought
466
00:15:54,275 --> 00:15:56,610
I was gonna
miss you next year,
but good riddance!
467
00:15:56,644 --> 00:15:57,778
Stop!
468
00:15:57,811 --> 00:15:59,113
Tell me the truth...
469
00:15:59,147 --> 00:16:02,183
Are you all gonna head
out the door for college
and never look back?
470
00:16:04,318 --> 00:16:05,953
I see.
471
00:16:05,986 --> 00:16:07,055
(SIGHS)
472
00:16:07,088 --> 00:16:09,923
Every one of these pictures
breaks my heart.
473
00:16:09,957 --> 00:16:12,126
You all look sad or angry
or miserable.
474
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:14,128
And that is not
what I wanted.
475
00:16:14,162 --> 00:16:16,130
Bevy...
No!
476
00:16:16,164 --> 00:16:18,299
Let's just go home
and be done with it.
477
00:16:19,333 --> 00:16:21,402
I can't take another day
of family vacation
478
00:16:21,435 --> 00:16:23,504
if this is the last one
I'm ever gonna have.
479
00:16:27,275 --> 00:16:30,078
ADULT ADAM:
Our car and our mom
were broken,
480
00:16:30,111 --> 00:16:32,012
and all we wanted
was to go home.
481
00:16:32,046 --> 00:16:33,781
I thought we had
more suitcases
than this.
482
00:16:33,814 --> 00:16:34,848
We did.
483
00:16:34,882 --> 00:16:36,250
At least this
horrible trip
is over.
484
00:16:36,284 --> 00:16:38,819
ADULT ADAM: But it wasn't.
Not for my dad.
485
00:16:38,852 --> 00:16:41,922
He was about to head down
a road we never expected.
486
00:16:41,955 --> 00:16:43,524
You know what I think?
487
00:16:43,557 --> 00:16:45,159
I think you're all
(BLEEP) in the head.
488
00:16:45,193 --> 00:16:46,860
Whoa!
Motel language!
489
00:16:46,894 --> 00:16:47,961
You're just
gonna give up?
490
00:16:47,995 --> 00:16:49,029
Yeah.
Kinda.
491
00:16:49,063 --> 00:16:50,264
Do we have a choice?
492
00:16:50,298 --> 00:16:53,167
Your mom worked her ass off
to plan you a great vacation,
493
00:16:53,201 --> 00:16:54,868
and I didn't know why.
494
00:16:54,902 --> 00:16:56,504
But, damn it, I do now.
495
00:16:57,538 --> 00:16:58,839
Murray,
what are you saying?
496
00:16:58,872 --> 00:17:00,641
I'm not sure
about the future,
497
00:17:00,674 --> 00:17:02,876
but right here, right now,
498
00:17:02,910 --> 00:17:05,679
there's no amount of money
I wouldn't spend
499
00:17:05,713 --> 00:17:07,715
for my family
to have a great vacation.
500
00:17:07,748 --> 00:17:08,882
Dad's suddenly
thoughtful!
501
00:17:08,916 --> 00:17:10,384
He must've banged his head
in the accident!
502
00:17:10,418 --> 00:17:11,485
Are you serious?
503
00:17:11,519 --> 00:17:13,787
To keep
this family together,
504
00:17:13,821 --> 00:17:15,823
I would spend
every last penny.
505
00:17:15,856 --> 00:17:17,791
(CAR HORN HONKS)
506
00:17:17,825 --> 00:17:19,227
Hey, Goldbergs,
need a lift?
507
00:17:19,260 --> 00:17:21,095
Thank God!
Everybody get in!
Come on!
508
00:17:21,129 --> 00:17:22,963
Geoff!
How did you find us?
509
00:17:22,996 --> 00:17:25,233
Well, you left my dad
a lot of very upsetting
messages,
510
00:17:25,266 --> 00:17:27,034
so I drove here
as fast as I could.
511
00:17:27,067 --> 00:17:29,002
I followed your suitcases
like bread crumbs!
512
00:17:29,036 --> 00:17:30,904
So, what did you want
to talk to me about?
513
00:17:33,073 --> 00:17:34,308
Well...
514
00:17:34,342 --> 00:17:37,845
I had such an amazing time
doing nothing this summer,
515
00:17:37,878 --> 00:17:40,381
that I want it
to continue.
516
00:17:40,414 --> 00:17:41,782
I'm not going to school
in the fall.
517
00:17:42,383 --> 00:17:43,917
Oh, my God!
That's it?
518
00:17:43,951 --> 00:17:46,420
Well, yeah. I mean,
it's a pretty big deal.
519
00:17:46,454 --> 00:17:47,755
My dad's not thrilled.
520
00:17:47,788 --> 00:17:49,056
And your messages
didn't exactly
521
00:17:49,089 --> 00:17:50,724
fill him with hope
for my future.
522
00:17:50,758 --> 00:17:52,860
You jerk!
I thought you were
breaking up with me!
523
00:17:52,893 --> 00:17:54,262
What? Never.
524
00:17:54,295 --> 00:17:55,963
You're the greatest thing
that ever happened to me.
525
00:17:56,597 --> 00:17:57,931
I never doubted it.
526
00:17:57,965 --> 00:18:00,601
ADULT ADAM: Turns out
some trips are about
finding your way,
527
00:18:00,634 --> 00:18:02,736
and not losing track
of where you're headed.
528
00:18:02,770 --> 00:18:04,872
Hey, Bar.
About what I said.
529
00:18:04,905 --> 00:18:06,540
No, you were right.
530
00:18:06,574 --> 00:18:07,775
I'm not ready for college.
531
00:18:07,808 --> 00:18:08,909
Of course you are.
532
00:18:08,942 --> 00:18:10,611
You're Big Tasty.
533
00:18:10,644 --> 00:18:13,781
You attack everything you do
with the full force
of your being.
534
00:18:13,814 --> 00:18:16,450
Trust me, college is gonna be
a piece of cake for you.
535
00:18:16,484 --> 00:18:17,785
You really think so?
536
00:18:17,818 --> 00:18:18,952
I know so.
537
00:18:19,753 --> 00:18:21,054
Thanks, Ad-Rock.
538
00:18:21,088 --> 00:18:23,557
ADULT ADAM: Venturing out
can be scary,
539
00:18:23,591 --> 00:18:24,758
but it's easier
to take that trek
540
00:18:24,792 --> 00:18:26,627
when you're riding
with the people you love.
541
00:18:26,660 --> 00:18:29,029
Family vacations are hard.
542
00:18:29,062 --> 00:18:31,965
They're stressful
and expensive,
543
00:18:31,999 --> 00:18:33,967
and uncomfortable.
544
00:18:34,001 --> 00:18:35,469
But the thing
that makes them great
545
00:18:35,503 --> 00:18:37,905
are the memories
of doing it all together.
546
00:18:37,938 --> 00:18:39,440
We're really here.
547
00:18:40,274 --> 00:18:41,309
Thank you, Mama.
548
00:18:42,109 --> 00:18:43,644
Anything for you, schmoo.
549
00:18:43,677 --> 00:18:45,913
Maybe next year we can go
to Walt Disney World.
550
00:18:45,946 --> 00:18:46,980
That sounds pretty cool.
551
00:18:47,014 --> 00:18:48,148
Yeah, I guess I'd try it.
552
00:18:48,182 --> 00:18:50,384
Wait... You guys
would wanna do this again?
553
00:18:50,418 --> 00:18:51,952
I'm open to it.
(GASPS)
554
00:18:51,985 --> 00:18:54,288
Ah! My schmoopies
will be with me forever!
555
00:18:54,322 --> 00:18:56,657
(CAR HORN HONKS)
556
00:18:56,690 --> 00:18:58,759
(PARKING BRAKE CLICKS)
Are we too late?
557
00:18:58,792 --> 00:19:01,495
We got lost.
Intentionally.
558
00:19:01,529 --> 00:19:03,464
Just in time, Pops!
We're running for it!
559
00:19:03,497 --> 00:19:06,267
(CHARIOTS OF FIRE PLAYS)
560
00:19:22,182 --> 00:19:24,518
Oh, sorry,
park's closed.
561
00:19:24,552 --> 00:19:26,854
What? Oh, no!
S-someone do something!
562
00:19:26,887 --> 00:19:28,522
I'm here!
(LAUGHS)
563
00:19:28,556 --> 00:19:31,091
Don't worry, schmoo.
Mama's got this.
564
00:19:31,124 --> 00:19:32,159
ADULT ADAM: In that moment,
565
00:19:32,192 --> 00:19:33,794
Beverly Goldberg
did what she did best...
566
00:19:33,827 --> 00:19:36,196
She lied her ass off.
567
00:19:36,230 --> 00:19:38,999
She told elaborate,
far-fetched tales
of our journey.
568
00:19:39,032 --> 00:19:41,369
Apparently,
we were attacked
by bald eagles
569
00:19:41,402 --> 00:19:43,271
and a motorcycle gang?
570
00:19:43,304 --> 00:19:46,274
There was a tornado,
and then a tsunami.
571
00:19:46,307 --> 00:19:48,676
And then another tornado.
572
00:19:48,709 --> 00:19:52,346
She wove a tapestry of lies
so intricate, so beautiful,
573
00:19:52,380 --> 00:19:54,482
by the end, none of us knew
what was real.
574
00:19:54,515 --> 00:19:56,049
...and that is when
little Adam
575
00:19:56,083 --> 00:19:59,119
had to help his grandpa
by sucking out the venom.
576
00:19:59,152 --> 00:20:02,356
Wow, you guys
have been through
a whole lot as a family.
577
00:20:02,390 --> 00:20:04,492
And you know what?
I had no idea
there were zebras in Arizona.
578
00:20:04,525 --> 00:20:06,360
Zebras are the piranhas
of the sand.
579
00:20:06,394 --> 00:20:09,029
Well, you know what?
All I meant was
the park is closed now.
580
00:20:09,062 --> 00:20:10,398
But it opens
in 15 minutes.
581
00:20:10,431 --> 00:20:11,832
(LAUGHS)
582
00:20:11,865 --> 00:20:13,801
Why didn't you
say something?
583
00:20:13,834 --> 00:20:15,569
Well, I tried, but you were
going on and on and on.
584
00:20:15,603 --> 00:20:17,405
But go on in!
Come on,
the park's all yours!
585
00:20:17,438 --> 00:20:19,172
Rusty, you're the best!
(CHUCKLES)
586
00:20:19,206 --> 00:20:21,008
Let's do it, Adam!
Let's go ride "Star Tours"!
587
00:20:21,041 --> 00:20:22,376
No, no!
588
00:20:22,410 --> 00:20:25,245
I think I know something
that would be more fun
for the whole family.
589
00:20:25,279 --> 00:20:26,714
* Holiday road
590
00:20:26,747 --> 00:20:29,717
ADULT ADAM: We finally made it
to the happiest place
on Earth.
591
00:20:29,750 --> 00:20:32,152
And as magical as it was,
thanks to my mom,
592
00:20:32,185 --> 00:20:35,356
I realized the best part
of the Goldberg vacation
593
00:20:35,389 --> 00:20:36,724
was the journey.
594
00:20:36,757 --> 00:20:39,527
To this day,
we still travel
as a family.
595
00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:41,495
Of course,
it never gets easier,
596
00:20:41,529 --> 00:20:43,664
but I wouldn't trade it
for the world.
597
00:20:43,697 --> 00:20:45,833
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS)
598
00:20:45,866 --> 00:20:50,671
* Holiday
ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-ad
599
00:20:50,704 --> 00:20:55,709
* Holiday
ro-o-o-o-o-o-o-ad *
600
00:21:05,285 --> 00:21:08,556
Wakey-wakey!
Get out! I was
just dreaming about
601
00:21:08,589 --> 00:21:10,257
scoring a touchdown
for the Eagles!
602
00:21:10,290 --> 00:21:11,559
But I brought you
breakfast.
603
00:21:11,592 --> 00:21:12,793
Well, finally!
604
00:21:12,826 --> 00:21:14,962
I've been trying
to take my meals
in my room for years.
605
00:21:14,995 --> 00:21:16,229
Gimme!
606
00:21:16,263 --> 00:21:17,698
This is
a whole lotta liquids.
607
00:21:17,731 --> 00:21:19,467
All part of
a balanced breakfast.
608
00:21:20,601 --> 00:21:21,969
No! My juices!
609
00:21:22,002 --> 00:21:23,937
Oh, no! My hot coffee!
610
00:21:23,971 --> 00:21:26,239
Oh, no! Adam! Hit stop!
611
00:21:26,273 --> 00:21:28,208
I should have never
stolen this from the motel!
612
00:21:28,241 --> 00:21:29,510
Yeah,
I'm gonna miss you.
45010
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish (Latin American)
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof