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1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162
WWW.MY-SUBS.CO
1
00:00:04,701 --> 00:00:07,602
Hey, check it out.
I got an "F" on my report card.
2
00:00:07,671 --> 00:00:12,165
- An "F"? What'd you fail?
- English.
3
00:00:13,276 --> 00:00:15,938
Isn't that what we speak?
4
00:00:17,847 --> 00:00:20,077
Hey, I got a "B" in Spanish.
5
00:00:21,851 --> 00:00:25,685
When did I start
taking Spanish?
6
00:00:25,755 --> 00:00:28,986
Whoa, Donna,
that's a cigarette!
7
00:00:29,059 --> 00:00:31,687
Even worse,
it's a menthol.
8
00:00:31,761 --> 00:00:34,127
You're gonna get suspended,
little lady.
9
00:00:34,197 --> 00:00:39,601
- When did you start smoking?
- What? You just saw me light it.
10
00:00:39,669 --> 00:00:43,730
Yes. Ha, ha, ha. Come on, Donna.
You know smoking causes cancer.
11
00:00:43,807 --> 00:00:46,970
I know, but it makes me look cool,
so it's an even trade.
12
00:00:47,043 --> 00:00:48,977
Hold this.
13
00:00:52,482 --> 00:00:55,713
- Ah, geez, Forman, hold it like a man, would ya?
- Shut up!
14
00:01:00,356 --> 00:01:03,723
Wow, Donna. First you fail English.
Now you're smoking.
15
00:01:03,793 --> 00:01:06,125
Can I ask you,
what are you doing?
16
00:01:06,196 --> 00:01:08,289
Smoking. Failing.
17
00:01:10,400 --> 00:01:13,335
Hey, Forman.
Smoking on school property?
18
00:01:13,403 --> 00:01:17,931
- No, that's not his. That's mine.
- No, it's, uh... it's mine.
19
00:01:19,375 --> 00:01:21,366
Yeah.
20
00:01:27,383 --> 00:01:29,908
Mmm. Menthol.
21
00:01:31,287 --> 00:01:33,255
- Eric, quit it.
- Yeah, okay.
22
00:01:33,323 --> 00:01:35,484
Let's go, Forman.
23
00:01:39,963 --> 00:01:41,954
Dios mio.
24
00:01:43,266 --> 00:01:45,461
No es bueno.
25
00:02:23,706 --> 00:02:26,106
Eric Forman's first suspension.
26
00:02:27,177 --> 00:02:29,577
I'm so proud!
27
00:02:29,646 --> 00:02:31,705
No, wait, back up.
Why'd he get suspended?
28
00:02:31,781 --> 00:02:35,945
- Because he's stupid.
- They can do that?
29
00:02:39,489 --> 00:02:42,788
No, he told them it was his cigarette.
And that's stupid.
30
00:02:42,859 --> 00:02:46,090
Please, Donna, stop.
Don't fall all over yourself thanking me.
31
00:02:46,162 --> 00:02:47,993
I didn't need your help.
32
00:02:48,064 --> 00:02:51,693
Yeah, Forman, I think
she wants to get into trouble.
33
00:02:51,768 --> 00:02:54,532
It's Donna's little cry for help.
34
00:02:54,604 --> 00:02:57,596
"Help me, help me!"
35
00:02:57,674 --> 00:03:00,643
We hear you, Donna.
And we love you.
36
00:03:00,710 --> 00:03:03,406
- Get bent. You guys are jerks.
- Wait. Why am I a jerk?
37
00:03:03,479 --> 00:03:05,777
I don't even know
what's going on!
38
00:03:07,283 --> 00:03:10,184
This is great.
Why did I even take the fall?
39
00:03:10,253 --> 00:03:14,053
I mean, Donna doesn't care and,
you know, Red's gonna kill me.
40
00:03:14,123 --> 00:03:16,990
Relax, Forman.
He's not gonna...
41
00:03:17,060 --> 00:03:20,587
Oh, wait, did you say kill you?
42
00:03:20,663 --> 00:03:23,723
Yeah, you're right.
43
00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:25,734
Hyde, this isn't funny.
On Red's list of screwups...
44
00:03:25,802 --> 00:03:30,034
getting suspended from school is right
up there with backing over my mom.
45
00:03:31,608 --> 00:03:34,133
Hey, man, having a chick
is about sacrifice.
46
00:03:34,210 --> 00:03:37,702
Like Jackie... she wants to decorate my van
with some of her girlie stuff, right?
47
00:03:37,780 --> 00:03:42,376
So I tell her she can have
one stuffed animal... in the glove box.
48
00:03:42,452 --> 00:03:45,353
See? Sacrifice.
49
00:03:45,421 --> 00:03:48,117
Kelso, 'member how you used
to put your whole fist in your mouth?
50
00:03:48,191 --> 00:03:51,092
- Yeah.
- Do it now.
51
00:03:52,262 --> 00:03:55,163
Damn, why is everybody
so crabby today?
52
00:03:57,834 --> 00:04:01,668
- What's in the suitcase?
- Stuffed animals for the van, remember?
53
00:04:03,039 --> 00:04:05,974
Look, Michael, I know
we agreed on just one...
54
00:04:06,042 --> 00:04:08,738
but then I got to thinking,
and, well, I want them all.
55
00:04:10,013 --> 00:04:12,504
- But...
- But what, Michael?
56
00:04:13,583 --> 00:04:15,574
But...
57
00:04:16,953 --> 00:04:19,114
Okay.
58
00:04:19,188 --> 00:04:22,214
Whoa, ease up on her, Kelso.
59
00:04:22,292 --> 00:04:24,590
You know, sacrifice is hard.
60
00:04:27,931 --> 00:04:32,197
So, my host parents set me up on a blind
date. And she has a friend for you, Hyde.
61
00:04:34,537 --> 00:04:37,529
Finally.
Somebody to love.
62
00:04:37,607 --> 00:04:40,041
And it gets better.
63
00:04:40,109 --> 00:04:42,339
They're not even blind.
64
00:04:47,617 --> 00:04:50,313
Get it? Blind.
65
00:04:50,386 --> 00:04:52,320
Screw you. That's funny.
66
00:04:59,128 --> 00:05:02,291
- Oh.
- Oh, hi, honey. Your mom and I are going out tonight.
67
00:05:02,365 --> 00:05:06,529
- It's happy hour at Swingles.
- What's Swingles?
68
00:05:06,602 --> 00:05:10,094
- It's a singles bar.
- No, it's a swingers bar.
69
00:05:10,173 --> 00:05:12,641
Yeah, it's both.
70
00:05:12,709 --> 00:05:15,678
And you're neither.
71
00:05:15,745 --> 00:05:18,441
Don't get involved, Donna.
This is grown-up stuff.
72
00:05:18,514 --> 00:05:21,881
Well, before you go,
there's my report card.
73
00:05:21,951 --> 00:05:24,977
An "F"?
74
00:05:25,054 --> 00:05:28,251
Donna, we're very disappointed.
And we're gonna have a long talk about this.
75
00:05:28,324 --> 00:05:31,225
Yes, we are.
Right after happy hour.
76
00:05:32,729 --> 00:05:35,527
Provided we don't meet anyone.
77
00:05:35,598 --> 00:05:40,160
All right, I've learned my lesson
and I'll be sure to try harder.
78
00:05:40,236 --> 00:05:44,036
- There's our girl.
- Ooh, wish us luck.
79
00:05:52,348 --> 00:05:54,282
Welcome home, smoker.
80
00:05:55,985 --> 00:05:57,919
Oh, no.
81
00:05:57,987 --> 00:06:01,923
The school just called. You're lucky
I answered the phone and not Dad.
82
00:06:01,991 --> 00:06:03,686
You didn't tell?
83
00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:06,729
Eric, of course I didn't tell.
84
00:06:07,964 --> 00:06:11,923
Well, if it isn't Mr. Smoker.
85
00:06:14,103 --> 00:06:17,163
Oh, wait. Yes, I did.
86
00:06:19,575 --> 00:06:22,772
- I'm nervous.
- Don't be nervous. You'll get sweaty.
87
00:06:22,845 --> 00:06:25,973
Oh, no, too late.
88
00:06:26,049 --> 00:06:28,882
I can't help it.
This is my first official American date.
89
00:06:28,951 --> 00:06:32,443
That's why I'm here, Fez...
to help you out, man.
90
00:06:32,522 --> 00:06:34,820
Unless they're "uggos."
And then I'm gone.
91
00:06:34,891 --> 00:06:37,291
There they are.
92
00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:40,295
And they're not even uggos.
93
00:06:40,363 --> 00:06:44,663
No, they're hot.
And the blonde's blonde and hot.
94
00:06:44,734 --> 00:06:48,636
Yes. And since I set us up
on this date, she is mine, right?
95
00:06:48,704 --> 00:06:50,968
Well, I can see
why you'd think that.
96
00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:54,032
But, actually, since I came along
to help you out...
97
00:06:54,110 --> 00:06:57,011
American custom dictates
that I get the blonde.
98
00:06:57,080 --> 00:07:01,483
Once again, the local custom
bones the foreign guy.
99
00:07:01,551 --> 00:07:04,179
America, man.
Love it or leave it.
100
00:07:11,060 --> 00:07:15,554
This... This is Chamomile the Camel.
He can sit in the backseat.
101
00:07:15,631 --> 00:07:19,294
But Llama Cass here,
she has to sit up in the front with us.
102
00:07:22,338 --> 00:07:27,435
Jackie, it's just, I thought all you wanted
is to put in one little animal.
103
00:07:27,510 --> 00:07:31,970
Well, I know, Michael. But this way there
will be even more things to remind you of me.
104
00:07:32,048 --> 00:07:34,573
Don't you like thinking
about me?
105
00:07:34,650 --> 00:07:36,914
No, of course I do.
106
00:07:36,986 --> 00:07:38,977
The thing is...
107
00:07:39,055 --> 00:07:42,320
How can I say this
without hurting your feelings?
108
00:07:42,391 --> 00:07:44,484
Oh, okay.
109
00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:47,461
I don't want your stupid things
in my cool van.
110
00:07:49,332 --> 00:07:51,391
What? No!
111
00:07:51,467 --> 00:07:54,459
I didn't say you were stupid.
Just everything you like!
112
00:07:58,207 --> 00:08:00,402
Congratulations, Eric.
You got suspended.
113
00:08:00,476 --> 00:08:02,944
Are you getting dumber?
114
00:08:05,381 --> 00:08:07,815
Gee, I don't think so.
115
00:08:07,884 --> 00:08:10,614
Look, Dad,
I don't smoke.
116
00:08:12,989 --> 00:08:16,254
Daddy, if Eric's a smoker
and he lies about smoking...
117
00:08:16,325 --> 00:08:18,885
doesn't that make him
a smoking liar?
118
00:08:21,397 --> 00:08:24,195
Okay, you know what? That's enough.
Eric, have some more pot roast.
119
00:08:24,267 --> 00:08:27,896
Here's some mashed potatoes,
and here's a photo of a cancerous lung.
120
00:08:27,970 --> 00:08:29,961
Whoa!
121
00:08:30,973 --> 00:08:32,907
Mom, gross!
122
00:08:32,975 --> 00:08:36,035
- Look, I don't smoke!
- Okay, well, either way...
123
00:08:36,112 --> 00:08:39,513
that is what's gonna happen
to your lungs if you keep on smoking.
124
00:08:39,582 --> 00:08:44,383
Well, the way he's screwing up his life,
death will be a sweet release.
125
00:08:52,295 --> 00:08:55,230
So I got that
to look forward to.
126
00:08:55,298 --> 00:09:00,031
You got suspended, pal. How do you think
your college interviews are gonna go?
127
00:09:02,538 --> 00:09:06,167
Well, looks like we have
a model student here.
128
00:09:06,242 --> 00:09:10,736
Excellent grades, secretary-treasurer
of the A.V. Club.
129
00:09:10,813 --> 00:09:13,805
Uh-oh. What's this?
130
00:09:13,883 --> 00:09:15,908
You were suspended?
131
00:09:15,985 --> 00:09:20,285
Yes, sir, for smoking.
132
00:09:20,356 --> 00:09:23,519
Well, we can't have a loser
like you at our school.
133
00:09:23,593 --> 00:09:28,530
I'm sorry to say, you're not
Princeton material, dumb-ass!
134
00:09:30,066 --> 00:09:32,534
Oh, if only...
135
00:09:32,602 --> 00:09:36,834
I'd listened... to my mother.
136
00:09:42,545 --> 00:09:44,536
Sorry.
137
00:09:47,783 --> 00:09:50,718
What a lesson I have learned.
Can I go?
138
00:09:50,786 --> 00:09:55,917
Sure. Right after you smoke
this entire pack of cigarettes.
139
00:09:57,493 --> 00:09:59,427
Yea, Daddy!
140
00:09:59,495 --> 00:10:02,953
Ooh, tear off the filters.
141
00:10:03,032 --> 00:10:05,762
Dad, you can't be serious.
142
00:10:05,835 --> 00:10:08,963
Have I ever not been serious?
143
00:10:09,038 --> 00:10:11,472
Dad, I'm telling you
the truth, okay?
144
00:10:11,540 --> 00:10:15,670
You have to take my word for it.
I don't smoke.
145
00:10:17,346 --> 00:10:19,280
Your word, huh?
146
00:10:19,348 --> 00:10:22,010
It's all a man has.
147
00:10:23,252 --> 00:10:25,584
Well, now, that's nice.
148
00:10:26,656 --> 00:10:29,090
What a load of crap.
Light up!
149
00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:41,166
Hey, I heard Eric got suspended.
150
00:10:41,236 --> 00:10:43,727
Yeah, and we're all real proud.
151
00:10:45,440 --> 00:10:47,374
I'll tell you what, Red.
152
00:10:47,442 --> 00:10:50,502
I think Donna's been having trouble
because Eric's a bad influence.
153
00:10:52,314 --> 00:10:54,441
Could be.
154
00:10:54,516 --> 00:10:59,920
But did you ever think the way you and Midge
act like idiots, that might be screwing her up?
155
00:11:02,657 --> 00:11:04,818
Nope. I'm pretty sure
it's Eric.
156
00:11:06,194 --> 00:11:08,560
Well, that's kind of stupid, Bob.
157
00:11:08,630 --> 00:11:13,260
- Well, I guess the truth hurts.
- So does a swift kick in the ass.
158
00:11:13,335 --> 00:11:15,769
All right, I'm going.
159
00:11:15,837 --> 00:11:19,204
But a swift kick in the ass is not
the solution to everything, Forman.
160
00:11:19,274 --> 00:11:21,902
I gotta disagree, Bob.
161
00:11:27,249 --> 00:11:29,683
- Gee, Dad, thanks...
- Keep sweeping, smoker.
162
00:11:29,751 --> 00:11:31,742
Will do.
163
00:11:34,623 --> 00:11:37,421
- Jackie, get in the van!
- No!
164
00:11:37,492 --> 00:11:39,084
- Jackie, get in the van!
- No!
165
00:11:39,161 --> 00:11:40,753
- Get in the van.
- No.
166
00:11:40,829 --> 00:11:42,421
- Jackie!
- No.
167
00:11:42,497 --> 00:11:45,261
Jackie, get in the van!
168
00:11:57,479 --> 00:11:59,413
- Hey.
- Hi.
169
00:11:59,481 --> 00:12:02,211
So, what do you want to do?
You want to watch some TV...
170
00:12:02,284 --> 00:12:04,912
or eat some ice cream or...
171
00:12:04,986 --> 00:12:08,513
I don't know,
apologize to me?
172
00:12:08,590 --> 00:12:11,684
- I'm sorry.
- Well, you should be.
173
00:12:12,928 --> 00:12:16,523
Okay, I'm sorry.
I was expecting more of a fight.
174
00:12:16,598 --> 00:12:19,658
Did you get in a lot of trouble
for the cigarette?
175
00:12:19,734 --> 00:12:21,793
Surprisingly, yes.
176
00:12:21,870 --> 00:12:27,308
- Turns out, Red has a temper. So, yeah. Who knew?
- Really?
177
00:12:27,375 --> 00:12:30,674
And, uh, your dad
doesn't like me anymore.
178
00:12:30,745 --> 00:12:34,203
Well, that's okay,
'cause I do.
179
00:12:39,621 --> 00:12:41,555
What's he doing here?
180
00:12:41,623 --> 00:12:43,614
Who?
181
00:12:47,028 --> 00:12:52,091
Maybe you should get off me
so I could, like, run away?
182
00:12:52,167 --> 00:12:54,294
- You better get out of here.
- Okay, fine. I'll get out of here.
183
00:12:54,369 --> 00:12:56,929
- Actually, I think he was talking to me.
- Come on.
184
00:12:57,005 --> 00:13:00,941
Okay. Boy, this is awkward,
with the Donna, and the yelling, and the...
185
00:13:06,147 --> 00:13:09,446
So then my pastor said, "It's okay
to get a "B" every once in a while.
186
00:13:09,517 --> 00:13:14,716
Nobody's perfect.
Except you know who."
187
00:13:14,789 --> 00:13:19,817
You know, it's just
so refreshing to meet someone...
188
00:13:19,894 --> 00:13:23,159
whose beliefs are
the complete opposite of mine.
189
00:13:23,231 --> 00:13:26,723
Yeah, well, I'm Episcopalian,
and my best friend is Presbyterian...
190
00:13:26,801 --> 00:13:29,167
but we're still best friends.
191
00:13:29,237 --> 00:13:32,138
It's hard work,
but it's worth it.
192
00:13:34,075 --> 00:13:38,535
- I bet you make really good punch, huh?
- Oh, my gosh, the best!
193
00:13:38,613 --> 00:13:42,014
Yeah, I mean, these teachers think they
deserve our respect, but they don't.
194
00:13:42,083 --> 00:13:45,746
I mean, who are they to teach us
about history and math?
195
00:13:45,820 --> 00:13:49,415
Mmm. I, too, am filled
with rebellious sexual tension.
196
00:13:49,491 --> 00:13:51,425
Yeah.
197
00:13:51,493 --> 00:13:55,361
I mean, it's like Malcolm X said...
"By any means necessary." Right?
198
00:13:55,430 --> 00:13:59,332
- You like Malcolm X?
- Hey, who doesn't like Malcolm X, huh?
199
00:13:59,401 --> 00:14:00,993
You've heard
of Malcolm X in Panama?
200
00:14:01,069 --> 00:14:04,061
- Oh, no, I'm not from Panama. I'm from...
- Hey, Fez, come here.
201
00:14:06,875 --> 00:14:10,208
American custom be damned.
I want you to have the blonde.
202
00:14:10,278 --> 00:14:12,508
Oh, my God.
203
00:14:12,580 --> 00:14:17,244
Blondes are notorious whores.
Thank you, Hyde.
204
00:14:17,319 --> 00:14:19,844
Not a problem.
205
00:14:21,523 --> 00:14:23,753
Hi.
206
00:14:23,825 --> 00:14:25,759
Bye.
207
00:14:30,198 --> 00:14:33,861
- Come on, Jackie. Just get in the van.
- No.
208
00:14:33,935 --> 00:14:36,165
- Jackie, just get in the van.
- No.
209
00:14:36,237 --> 00:14:38,171
- Jackie...
- No!
210
00:14:38,239 --> 00:14:40,070
- Get in the...
- No!
211
00:14:40,141 --> 00:14:42,075
- Jackie...
- No.
212
00:14:42,143 --> 00:14:44,407
- Jackie, get in the van!
- No.
213
00:14:44,479 --> 00:14:48,415
- All right, fine. I'm just gonna leave now.
- Bye.
214
00:14:48,483 --> 00:14:51,145
Damn it, Jackie,
get in the van!
215
00:14:51,219 --> 00:14:53,210
Nope.
216
00:14:54,522 --> 00:14:57,457
I heard G-11.
217
00:14:57,525 --> 00:15:00,517
So, naturally,
I yelled out "Bingo!"
218
00:15:00,595 --> 00:15:03,564
Boy, was the pastor
cheesed at me.
219
00:15:03,631 --> 00:15:06,065
Great story.
220
00:15:06,134 --> 00:15:08,068
So, you are a blonde?
221
00:15:08,136 --> 00:15:11,572
Yeah. Natural!
222
00:15:13,241 --> 00:15:15,903
I can't believe you like all
the same bands that I like.
223
00:15:15,977 --> 00:15:19,242
Yeah, I just like music
that's passionate and rebellious...
224
00:15:19,314 --> 00:15:21,544
and really pisses off my dad.
225
00:15:21,616 --> 00:15:24,710
Oh, Patty,
don't say "piss." Oh!
226
00:15:26,788 --> 00:15:30,189
Hey, you know what'd
really piss off your dad?
227
00:15:30,258 --> 00:15:32,988
You and me grab a 12-pack
and stay out all night.
228
00:15:33,061 --> 00:15:35,359
I can't. I have
a big test tomorrow.
229
00:15:35,430 --> 00:15:37,364
That's funny.
230
00:15:37,432 --> 00:15:39,730
Let's go.
231
00:15:39,801 --> 00:15:42,361
No, really,
I've gotta go study.
232
00:15:42,437 --> 00:15:45,895
Study? You don't study.
You've got a tattoo.
233
00:15:45,974 --> 00:15:48,602
Look, Hyde,
rebellion is cool and all...
234
00:15:48,676 --> 00:15:52,442
but I wanna get into a good college,
so I can fight the system from the inside.
235
00:15:52,514 --> 00:15:54,744
It was nice meeting you,
though. Mary?
236
00:15:54,816 --> 00:15:57,410
No, go ahead without me.
237
00:15:57,485 --> 00:16:00,181
So, Fez, um, my parents
aren't home.
238
00:16:00,255 --> 00:16:03,281
Wanna come back to my house?
I have a hot tub.
239
00:16:08,496 --> 00:16:11,124
That would be super.
240
00:16:20,408 --> 00:16:22,603
Donna, is it me, or...
241
00:16:22,677 --> 00:16:26,272
does your dad hating me
make me even more sexy?
242
00:16:26,347 --> 00:16:29,077
Sure.
243
00:16:30,185 --> 00:16:34,281
Yeah, I think he senses
my bad boyness.
244
00:16:34,355 --> 00:16:38,189
- Yeah, Eric, you're a parent's worst nightmare.
- Yes.
245
00:16:38,259 --> 00:16:40,853
Yes, I am.
246
00:16:50,238 --> 00:16:52,263
Mom, what are you doing?
247
00:16:52,340 --> 00:16:54,467
Nothing.
248
00:16:54,542 --> 00:16:58,672
And you, you just do
as I say, not as I do.
249
00:17:00,181 --> 00:17:03,480
Oh, hey, Mom, cool.
Give me a drag.
250
00:17:03,551 --> 00:17:08,511
Okay, see? Now, Laurie
is doing as I do. That is wrong.
251
00:17:08,590 --> 00:17:11,684
What's going on out here?
252
00:17:11,759 --> 00:17:14,227
Eric, are you smoking again?
253
00:17:16,264 --> 00:17:19,700
- I think he is, Daddy.
- No, he is not.
254
00:17:19,767 --> 00:17:21,758
I don't smoke!
255
00:17:21,836 --> 00:17:27,433
I think this might be my fault. I think he's
just imitating me, so he can look cool.
256
00:17:29,310 --> 00:17:33,508
Mr. And Mrs. Forman, Eric got caught
holding my cigarette at school.
257
00:17:33,581 --> 00:17:35,515
I'm the one who was smoking.
258
00:17:37,485 --> 00:17:40,215
Oh.
259
00:17:40,288 --> 00:17:43,724
Well, Donna, thank you
for your honesty.
260
00:17:43,791 --> 00:17:46,555
What? How come
you believe her?
261
00:17:46,628 --> 00:17:51,258
- I told you I don't smoke!
- Okay, I'm gonna go home now, so, uh, good night.
262
00:17:54,669 --> 00:17:57,900
Eric's not in trouble now?
263
00:17:57,972 --> 00:18:00,566
Fine!
264
00:18:00,642 --> 00:18:04,840
Well, now, I think you have
something to say to Eric.
265
00:18:04,913 --> 00:18:08,041
Oh, yeah.
266
00:18:08,116 --> 00:18:10,516
- Nice job on the driveway.
- Red.
267
00:18:10,585 --> 00:18:12,712
Okay. Just...
268
00:18:16,357 --> 00:18:21,226
Okay, I'm gonna say I'm sorry,
but you know, you do lie a lot.
269
00:18:21,296 --> 00:18:23,321
What have I lied about?
270
00:18:23,398 --> 00:18:27,061
You lied about the beer keg,
the dent in the Vista Cruiser.
271
00:18:27,135 --> 00:18:29,763
You lied when you said
you weren't taking the car out of town.
272
00:18:29,837 --> 00:18:32,431
- You knew about that?
- I do now.
273
00:18:32,507 --> 00:18:35,067
- Oh!
- Ha!
274
00:18:35,143 --> 00:18:39,637
- We're even.
- Oh, Dad, you've gotta be kidding me.
275
00:18:39,714 --> 00:18:42,080
Okay.
276
00:18:42,150 --> 00:18:44,846
I'm sorry I made you smoke
all those cigarettes.
277
00:18:44,919 --> 00:18:47,786
Okay.
278
00:18:47,855 --> 00:18:50,449
Yeah, that's okay.
279
00:18:50,525 --> 00:18:52,686
Actually, I kind of liked 'em.
280
00:18:52,760 --> 00:18:54,819
Watch it.
281
00:18:54,896 --> 00:18:57,729
No, no. I bet
they'd go great with beer.
282
00:18:58,900 --> 00:19:02,097
So does a swift kick
in the ass.
283
00:19:08,109 --> 00:19:10,942
- Jackie, get in the van!
- No!
284
00:19:11,012 --> 00:19:14,448
All right, fine! I give up. I give up!
285
00:19:14,515 --> 00:19:18,383
You can keep your stuffed
animals in the van.
286
00:19:18,453 --> 00:19:20,978
Do you really mean it?
287
00:19:21,055 --> 00:19:23,046
Yeah. But just one.
288
00:19:23,124 --> 00:19:24,386
- Five.
- Two.
289
00:19:24,459 --> 00:19:25,926
- Four.
- Three.
290
00:19:25,994 --> 00:19:27,928
- Four.
- Deal.
291
00:19:27,996 --> 00:19:30,362
Five.
292
00:19:30,431 --> 00:19:32,422
All right, five!
293
00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:35,867
- Six.
- Fine!
294
00:19:40,208 --> 00:19:43,439
So, you have me in your tub.
295
00:19:43,511 --> 00:19:48,210
If you are trying to send a sexy message,
then message received.
296
00:19:48,282 --> 00:19:52,514
Well, Fez, I know we made
out in my parents' bedroom...
297
00:19:52,587 --> 00:19:55,021
and I know we Frenched
in the pool house...
298
00:19:55,089 --> 00:19:58,490
and I know that may seem
romantic to some people.
299
00:19:58,559 --> 00:20:01,357
Tell me something
I don't know.
300
00:20:01,429 --> 00:20:03,954
I have a boyfriend.
301
00:20:06,968 --> 00:20:09,027
See? That I did not know.
302
00:20:09,103 --> 00:20:14,006
Fez, I really like you, but he's in college,
and we're still faithful.
303
00:20:14,075 --> 00:20:16,441
I see.
304
00:20:16,511 --> 00:20:21,471
You know, there are many ways
to remain faithful yet still have fun.
305
00:20:21,549 --> 00:20:23,574
- Really?
- Oh, yes.
306
00:20:28,723 --> 00:20:32,250
That's much better.
307
00:20:38,866 --> 00:20:40,857
- Hey.
- Hey.
308
00:20:43,371 --> 00:20:47,034
So, I told Bob and Midge
that it was my cigarette.
309
00:20:47,108 --> 00:20:49,508
And how'd that go?
310
00:20:49,577 --> 00:20:52,910
Really good.
They grounded me.
311
00:20:52,980 --> 00:20:56,245
Cool. So what are
you doing over here?
312
00:20:56,317 --> 00:20:58,478
Snuck out.
313
00:20:58,553 --> 00:21:01,886
Being grounded makes it
so much naughtier.
314
00:21:04,092 --> 00:21:08,529
You know, Donna,
I'm not gonna tell you what to do.
315
00:21:08,596 --> 00:21:12,532
But failing classes is not the only way
to get attention from your parents.
316
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:16,263
I mean, for instance, a lot of girls,
when they're having a bad time at home...
317
00:21:16,337 --> 00:21:19,465
just... go slutty.
318
00:21:23,711 --> 00:21:26,612
You know what, Eric?
You're right.
319
00:21:26,681 --> 00:21:28,808
- Let's have sex right now.
- Really?
320
00:21:28,883 --> 00:21:31,681
- No.
- Stop doing that!
321
00:21:41,295 --> 00:21:43,229
- Michael, get in the van.
- No.
322
00:21:43,297 --> 00:21:45,026
- Michael, get in the van!
- No.
323
00:21:45,099 --> 00:21:46,828
- Get in the van!
- No.
324
00:21:46,901 --> 00:21:48,835
- Michael.
- No.
325
00:21:48,903 --> 00:21:52,395
- Get in the van.
- No.
326
00:21:52,473 --> 00:21:54,464
Fine.
327
00:22:01,883 --> 00:22:05,319
Wait. Jackie.
Jackie, it's my van!
328
00:22:07,021 --> 00:22:08,613
Jackie!
25114
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