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1
00:00:04,157 --> 00:00:07,118
{\an8}[exciting music]
2
00:00:07,201 --> 00:00:12,415
{\an8}♪ ♪
3
00:00:12,498 --> 00:00:14,459
[breathing heavily]
4
00:00:14,542 --> 00:00:16,501
Hey! Stop!
5
00:00:16,585 --> 00:00:17,461
It's an emergency!
6
00:00:17,544 --> 00:00:20,046
What are you doing?
7
00:00:20,130 --> 00:00:21,381
It's not safe!
8
00:00:21,465 --> 00:00:24,384
[panting]
9
00:00:24,468 --> 00:00:29,639
♪ ♪
10
00:00:29,723 --> 00:00:31,266
Under the seat.
11
00:00:31,349 --> 00:00:33,226
Thank you.
12
00:00:33,310 --> 00:00:36,646
Not the time to invite
any crow's feet.
13
00:00:36,730 --> 00:00:38,231
Yeah.
14
00:00:38,315 --> 00:00:41,151
♪ ♪
15
00:00:41,234 --> 00:00:42,235
[sighs]
16
00:00:42,319 --> 00:00:45,321
♪ ♪
17
00:00:45,404 --> 00:00:46,739
{\an8}God, look at this.
18
00:00:46,822 --> 00:00:49,658
Jack Danby's reps have him
19
00:00:49,742 --> 00:00:51,410
schmoozing
with the head of comedy
20
00:00:51,494 --> 00:00:52,912
and the CEO
of the whole conglomerate.
21
00:00:52,995 --> 00:00:54,455
You know what?
Don't worry,
22
00:00:54,538 --> 00:00:56,123
'cause Kayla and I
are all over it, OK?
23
00:00:56,207 --> 00:00:57,082
We're working really hard
to connect with Winnie Landell.
24
00:00:57,166 --> 00:01:00,294
Oh, yeah, she looks like
she's all over it.
25
00:01:00,377 --> 00:01:01,337
- [snoring]
- [sighs]
26
00:01:01,420 --> 00:01:03,923
Winnie's schedule is packed,
and every comedy rep
27
00:01:04,006 --> 00:01:05,841
is trying to sit down with her,
so it's been a little tricky.
28
00:01:05,925 --> 00:01:08,135
Tricky for you.
29
00:01:08,219 --> 00:01:10,221
You need to get a meeting
with Winnie ASAP.
30
00:01:10,304 --> 00:01:11,931
I promise you we will, OK?
31
00:01:12,014 --> 00:01:13,307
And when we do, I already
have a great angle, OK?
32
00:01:13,390 --> 00:01:14,849
I've practiced this.
33
00:01:14,933 --> 00:01:16,309
They probably want
someone diverse, right?
34
00:01:16,392 --> 00:01:19,813
Well, guess what.
Old is diverse, huh?
35
00:01:19,896 --> 00:01:23,024
Yeah.
We'll shatter the glass hip.
36
00:01:23,107 --> 00:01:26,027
No, I didn't mean that.
37
00:01:26,110 --> 00:01:27,570
Oh, man.
38
00:01:27,654 --> 00:01:28,947
Is there any way I can
get out of this thing?
39
00:01:29,030 --> 00:01:31,783
Cohosting
the Macy's Day Parade is...
40
00:01:31,866 --> 00:01:32,575
it's so daytime.
41
00:01:32,659 --> 00:01:33,701
It's not gonna help
with these guys.
42
00:01:33,785 --> 00:01:37,413
Well, we're 45 minutes
from landing to tape the promo,
43
00:01:37,497 --> 00:01:39,374
so I think it's a little late
to pull out.
44
00:01:39,457 --> 00:01:40,708
Is there any other
meaningful press
45
00:01:40,792 --> 00:01:42,460
I can do while I'm in New York?
46
00:01:42,544 --> 00:01:44,169
You know, I could probably
get you on "Talk Stoop."
47
00:01:44,253 --> 00:01:45,629
"Talk Soup"?
48
00:01:45,712 --> 00:01:46,463
No, "Talk Stoop"
with Cat Greenleaf.
49
00:01:46,547 --> 00:01:48,549
It's on Taxi TV.
50
00:01:48,632 --> 00:01:49,925
You sit on a stoop and... talk.
51
00:01:50,008 --> 00:01:52,719
- Oh, my God.
- You know what?
52
00:01:52,803 --> 00:01:54,513
You also have a standing offer
at "The Chew."
53
00:01:54,596 --> 00:01:55,764
- "The Jew"?
- "The Chew," like teeth.
54
00:01:55,848 --> 00:01:58,058
Oh, yeah. No, I know.
55
00:01:58,141 --> 00:01:58,725
You need to come up
with better ideas.
56
00:01:58,809 --> 00:02:01,395
And speak from your diaphragm.
57
00:02:01,478 --> 00:02:02,896
[forcefully] Will do.
[clears throat]
58
00:02:02,980 --> 00:02:06,316
People, this is what
we're up against,
59
00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:08,068
a Harvard boy with connections.
60
00:02:08,151 --> 00:02:09,903
Sitting on a stoop can't compete
61
00:02:09,987 --> 00:02:11,488
with a guy who just hosted
62
00:02:11,572 --> 00:02:13,031
the White House
Correspondents' Dinner.
63
00:02:13,115 --> 00:02:15,366
OK, why don't you just
put out a press release
64
00:02:15,449 --> 00:02:16,242
saying that you want late night
65
00:02:16,325 --> 00:02:17,493
so that way,
you're in the conversation?
66
00:02:17,577 --> 00:02:20,413
Oh, God, no.
67
00:02:20,496 --> 00:02:23,416
A woman can't just come out
and say what she wants.
68
00:02:23,499 --> 00:02:24,917
No, that looks...
69
00:02:25,001 --> 00:02:26,085
- both: Thirsty.
- Mm-hmm.
70
00:02:26,168 --> 00:02:27,962
No, it's got to seem
like it's their idea.
71
00:02:28,045 --> 00:02:30,464
OK, fine.
Do what you want.
72
00:02:30,548 --> 00:02:32,925
I'll just be quiet
and keep eating these cookies.
73
00:02:34,468 --> 00:02:36,429
Those are dog biscuits.
74
00:02:36,512 --> 00:02:37,597
I'm aware. They're delicious...
75
00:02:37,680 --> 00:02:39,849
and grain-free.
76
00:02:39,932 --> 00:02:41,142
The chef told me.
77
00:02:41,225 --> 00:02:41,601
I was like,
are you fucking serious?
78
00:02:41,684 --> 00:02:45,395
[upbeat music]
79
00:02:45,478 --> 00:02:50,775
♪ ♪
80
00:02:50,859 --> 00:02:53,945
So Deborah and I agreed
that while I'm with her,
81
00:02:54,029 --> 00:02:55,113
I should also spend time
working on my own stuff.
82
00:02:55,196 --> 00:02:57,699
You absolutely should;
I would love to get
83
00:02:57,782 --> 00:02:59,618
- a feature out of you.
- You and me both.
84
00:02:59,701 --> 00:03:01,578
So I was wondering
if you knew of any, like,
85
00:03:01,661 --> 00:03:02,412
open writing assignments
86
00:03:02,495 --> 00:03:04,497
that you think
would be good for me.
87
00:03:04,581 --> 00:03:05,790
Yes, I have coverage
from Kayla, actually...
88
00:03:05,874 --> 00:03:07,167
Whoo!
89
00:03:07,250 --> 00:03:08,627
That I think
might be interesting.
90
00:03:08,710 --> 00:03:10,670
- OK, great.
- Literally every studio
91
00:03:10,754 --> 00:03:13,714
wants a procedural
based on "Operation."
92
00:03:13,797 --> 00:03:15,424
Remember that game?
[mimics buzzer]
93
00:03:15,507 --> 00:03:17,301
OK, what else you got?
94
00:03:17,384 --> 00:03:19,136
OK, so they've done
some market research,
95
00:03:19,219 --> 00:03:21,013
and they've found that Gen Z
thinks the animated spoon
96
00:03:21,096 --> 00:03:23,349
from "Beauty and the Beast"
is hot
97
00:03:23,432 --> 00:03:25,309
and apparently can "get it."
98
00:03:25,392 --> 00:03:28,312
So they want something
that focuses on his love life,
99
00:03:28,395 --> 00:03:31,899
like a spin-off focusing on
the animated spoon's love life.
100
00:03:31,982 --> 00:03:33,275
Love life.
101
00:03:33,359 --> 00:03:34,985
- Um, all right.
- OK.
102
00:03:35,069 --> 00:03:39,573
- Give me another one.
- No spoon. OK.
103
00:03:39,657 --> 00:03:41,075
Oh. I got it.
I found it.
104
00:03:41,158 --> 00:03:43,034
This one is good for you.
105
00:03:43,117 --> 00:03:45,662
They're doing a bisexual Gumby.
106
00:03:45,745 --> 00:03:47,038
He bends both ways.
107
00:03:47,121 --> 00:03:47,956
You're bisexual.
[laughs]
108
00:03:48,039 --> 00:03:50,166
Yeah, so that might be
perfect for you.
109
00:03:50,249 --> 00:03:50,833
The working title: "Gum-Bi."
110
00:03:50,917 --> 00:03:53,378
OK, you know what?
111
00:03:53,461 --> 00:03:54,963
I think I'm just gonna try
to write an idea of my own.
112
00:03:55,046 --> 00:03:57,882
Original is really
harder to sell.
113
00:03:57,966 --> 00:03:59,342
Honestly, nobody wants it.
114
00:03:59,425 --> 00:04:02,261
But Roku is open,
and they have two buckets
115
00:04:02,345 --> 00:04:02,929
they're looking to fill
right now,
116
00:04:03,012 --> 00:04:05,723
noisy concepts and Black joy.
117
00:04:05,807 --> 00:04:07,600
I think you should focus
on noisy concepts, though,
118
00:04:07,684 --> 00:04:08,518
since you are not Black...
no offense.
119
00:04:08,601 --> 00:04:11,062
You're not.
120
00:04:11,145 --> 00:04:12,688
Oh, OK.
121
00:04:12,771 --> 00:04:14,481
I missed one.
122
00:04:14,564 --> 00:04:15,357
They want to do something
with "Sleeping Beauty,"
123
00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:18,735
but apparently, this time,
it's consensual.
124
00:04:18,819 --> 00:04:19,736
And if someone could ask Hoda
where she got her scarf,
125
00:04:19,820 --> 00:04:21,905
I would just love it.
126
00:04:21,989 --> 00:04:22,948
Sure.
127
00:04:23,031 --> 00:04:24,408
Deborah Vance.
128
00:04:24,491 --> 00:04:25,701
Oh, my gosh, Henry Weeks!
129
00:04:25,784 --> 00:04:28,036
[chuckles]
130
00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:29,079
How have you been?
131
00:04:29,162 --> 00:04:30,622
I haven't seen you since...
132
00:04:30,706 --> 00:04:32,582
- Jerry Lewis Telethon.
- That's it.
133
00:04:32,666 --> 00:04:33,458
This is so wild.
134
00:04:33,542 --> 00:04:36,628
Two weeks ago,
I recorded an NPR segment
135
00:04:36,712 --> 00:04:40,382
where I had to pick something
from pop culture that I loved,
136
00:04:40,465 --> 00:04:42,591
and I talked about your special.
137
00:04:42,675 --> 00:04:43,592
- You did?
- Are you kidding?
138
00:04:43,676 --> 00:04:45,386
It was the best special
of the last ten years,
139
00:04:45,469 --> 00:04:49,140
which kills me because
I released one three years ago.
140
00:04:49,223 --> 00:04:50,558
[both laugh]
141
00:04:50,641 --> 00:04:53,060
Wow, that... wow, thank you.
142
00:04:53,144 --> 00:04:55,730
That means a lot
coming from you.
143
00:04:55,813 --> 00:04:56,397
I'm serious.
144
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:58,274
You took a lifetime of issues,
145
00:04:58,357 --> 00:05:00,067
and you turned it
into a work of genius.
146
00:05:00,151 --> 00:05:03,237
Actually,
are you still in Vegas?
147
00:05:03,320 --> 00:05:05,156
- Yeah.
- Oh, this is fabulous.
148
00:05:05,239 --> 00:05:07,950
'Cause every few years,
Terry, Cliff Calhoun, and I...
149
00:05:08,034 --> 00:05:09,076
Oh, let me guess...
150
00:05:09,160 --> 00:05:11,578
gamble, golf, drugs, women?
151
00:05:11,661 --> 00:05:12,245
No, even better.
152
00:05:12,328 --> 00:05:14,873
We get colonoscopies together.
153
00:05:14,956 --> 00:05:16,166
[laughs]
154
00:05:16,249 --> 00:05:17,751
I knew something
was going in a hole.
155
00:05:17,834 --> 00:05:19,627
[laughs]
We rent a house in Vegas.
156
00:05:19,711 --> 00:05:22,047
We play cards,
clear out our GI tract.
157
00:05:22,130 --> 00:05:23,298
Next day,
we get the colonoscopies.
158
00:05:23,381 --> 00:05:27,469
And then we celebrate
with a Vegas night out.
159
00:05:27,552 --> 00:05:30,305
And whoever has the cleanest
bill of health buys dinner.
160
00:05:30,388 --> 00:05:33,058
[laughs]
Well, that sounds like a blast.
161
00:05:33,141 --> 00:05:34,309
It is.
162
00:05:34,392 --> 00:05:35,769
And we're doing it this weekend.
163
00:05:35,852 --> 00:05:38,938
So if you're due,
you should come.
164
00:05:39,022 --> 00:05:40,148
I'd love to.
165
00:05:40,231 --> 00:05:42,399
I've been so busy, I'm overdue.
166
00:05:42,483 --> 00:05:43,734
Oh, well, that's great.
That's great.
167
00:05:43,817 --> 00:05:45,110
I will text you all the details.
168
00:05:45,194 --> 00:05:47,362
OK. Can I bring something?
169
00:05:47,446 --> 00:05:49,281
Air freshener.
170
00:05:49,364 --> 00:05:50,115
I guess men can be funny.
171
00:05:50,199 --> 00:05:52,367
- [both laugh]
- OK, see you soon.
172
00:05:55,996 --> 00:05:58,207
Just do it harder,
or don't do it at all, Jimmy.
173
00:05:58,290 --> 00:06:00,751
- [phone ringing]
- [groans]
174
00:06:03,212 --> 00:06:05,756
Hi. I got a delivery for Ruby.
175
00:06:05,839 --> 00:06:07,299
It says hand off in person.
176
00:06:07,382 --> 00:06:09,593
Oh, well, I'm... sorry,
I'm not there.
177
00:06:09,676 --> 00:06:10,927
It's my girlfriend's house.
178
00:06:11,010 --> 00:06:12,512
I mean, it's my house too.
179
00:06:12,595 --> 00:06:14,972
We're sort of taking space
right now
180
00:06:15,056 --> 00:06:16,891
to evaluate things.
181
00:06:16,974 --> 00:06:19,644
Hey, is that order
for one person or two?
182
00:06:19,727 --> 00:06:21,229
[sighs] I'm just gonna
leave it at the door.
183
00:06:21,312 --> 00:06:22,814
No, no,
just tell me if there's beef.
184
00:06:22,897 --> 00:06:23,815
She doesn't eat beef.
185
00:06:23,898 --> 00:06:25,316
Beef is a smoking gun!
186
00:06:25,399 --> 00:06:27,110
Sir!
187
00:06:27,193 --> 00:06:29,112
Hey, are you OK?
188
00:06:29,195 --> 00:06:30,571
Yeah. Why?
189
00:06:30,655 --> 00:06:31,781
You just yelled,
"Beef is a smoking gun."
190
00:06:31,864 --> 00:06:33,324
Oh, that.
191
00:06:33,407 --> 00:06:34,909
I think I'm extra sensitive
because Ruby's
192
00:06:34,992 --> 00:06:36,285
having this going-away party
on Friday.
193
00:06:36,369 --> 00:06:38,287
Do you think I should drive
four hours to LA
194
00:06:38,371 --> 00:06:38,996
to say goodbye even though
she didn't invite me?
195
00:06:39,080 --> 00:06:41,665
- I should, right?
- No.
196
00:06:41,748 --> 00:06:43,500
Whew. Your mind.
197
00:06:43,583 --> 00:06:45,168
But if you're looking
for a distraction,
198
00:06:45,252 --> 00:06:46,378
you could come to bar trivia
Friday night.
199
00:06:46,461 --> 00:06:47,796
You do bar trivia?
200
00:06:47,879 --> 00:06:49,214
OK, extracurriculars,
very healthy.
201
00:06:49,297 --> 00:06:51,842
Well, it is a team that my mom
202
00:06:51,925 --> 00:06:53,301
and ex-boyfriend
started without me.
203
00:06:53,385 --> 00:06:54,886
They only asked me to join
when they realized
204
00:06:54,970 --> 00:06:55,720
they needed someone
who knew state capitals.
205
00:06:55,804 --> 00:06:57,013
Sorry.
206
00:06:57,097 --> 00:06:58,849
Hello, my gorgeous team.
207
00:06:58,932 --> 00:07:00,308
What's going on?
208
00:07:00,392 --> 00:07:01,643
They slash
the capital gains tax?
209
00:07:01,726 --> 00:07:05,021
[laughs]
210
00:07:05,105 --> 00:07:07,190
No.
I'm getting a colonoscopy.
211
00:07:07,274 --> 00:07:08,108
- Ah.
- Hmm.
212
00:07:08,191 --> 00:07:10,609
But you just...
you just had one.
213
00:07:10,693 --> 00:07:13,112
I know, but this
is a group thing.
214
00:07:13,195 --> 00:07:14,405
- Well, OK.
- Exciting.
215
00:07:14,488 --> 00:07:14,989
- Oh, all right.
- Whoa!
216
00:07:15,072 --> 00:07:17,575
- OK!
- Shake it!
217
00:07:17,658 --> 00:07:18,909
- Shake that thing!
- [laughs]
218
00:07:18,993 --> 00:07:21,704
♪ ♪
219
00:07:21,787 --> 00:07:23,205
Honestly, this was a great idea.
220
00:07:23,289 --> 00:07:24,957
I cannot wait to hit.
221
00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:26,834
I've been so stressed out
with all this Deborah stuff.
222
00:07:26,917 --> 00:07:28,460
Yeah, I had no idea
they had courts here.
223
00:07:28,544 --> 00:07:29,086
Yeah, they don't have
tennis courts.
224
00:07:29,170 --> 00:07:31,005
They have pickleball courts.
225
00:07:31,088 --> 00:07:32,631
Wait, pickleball?
226
00:07:32,715 --> 00:07:34,717
Yeah, it's like tiny tennis.
[chuckles]
227
00:07:34,800 --> 00:07:35,551
I know what pickleball is,
but I thought we were
228
00:07:35,634 --> 00:07:38,429
playing tennis;
that's why I agreed.
229
00:07:38,512 --> 00:07:40,388
- OK, don't be mad at me.
- Oh, God.
230
00:07:40,471 --> 00:07:42,056
But this is our general
with Winnie Landell.
231
00:07:42,140 --> 00:07:44,350
What?
Kayla, what the hell?
232
00:07:44,434 --> 00:07:45,768
I thought you were
scheduling that for next week.
233
00:07:45,852 --> 00:07:47,562
I'm sorry, man.
234
00:07:47,645 --> 00:07:49,731
I can't be perfect, OK?
I tried to get us the meeting.
235
00:07:49,814 --> 00:07:50,773
Her next opening's not
for, like, eight months.
236
00:07:50,857 --> 00:07:53,359
But her second assistant Avi,
who I made out with
237
00:07:53,443 --> 00:07:55,236
seven years ago...
really bad kisser...
238
00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:56,571
said she's obsessed
with pickleball
239
00:07:56,654 --> 00:07:59,365
and she has a standing
reservation on this court.
240
00:07:59,449 --> 00:08:01,201
So you're welcome.
241
00:08:01,284 --> 00:08:02,702
Kayla, what do you
expect me to do here?
242
00:08:02,785 --> 00:08:03,912
You want me to just
walk up to her randomly,
243
00:08:03,995 --> 00:08:06,789
wearing mesh shorts, and pitch
Deborah to host late night?
244
00:08:06,873 --> 00:08:08,416
No, I want you to get
into a game with her,
245
00:08:08,499 --> 00:08:10,584
you know, impress her
with your skills.
246
00:08:10,667 --> 00:08:12,211
Maybe you earn her respect,
247
00:08:12,294 --> 00:08:14,338
and then you seal
the fucking deal, baby!
248
00:08:14,421 --> 00:08:16,089
OK, shh, we're at
an expensive country club.
249
00:08:16,173 --> 00:08:17,591
It's not illegal to yell.
250
00:08:17,674 --> 00:08:18,383
I don't know
how to play pickleball.
251
00:08:18,467 --> 00:08:21,803
And this plan is insanity, girl.
252
00:08:21,887 --> 00:08:22,638
You're an amazing tennis guy.
253
00:08:22,721 --> 00:08:24,264
You could probably
pick up any sport.
254
00:08:24,348 --> 00:08:25,766
- You could probably bowl.
- What...
255
00:08:25,849 --> 00:08:27,059
[sighs] Come on.
256
00:08:27,142 --> 00:08:28,310
I got us
these cute little paddles.
257
00:08:28,393 --> 00:08:28,936
It's kind of kinky.
258
00:08:29,019 --> 00:08:30,938
Come on, stretch me out.
259
00:08:31,021 --> 00:08:33,774
[sighs] My God.
260
00:08:33,857 --> 00:08:38,778
♪ ♪
261
00:08:38,861 --> 00:08:39,779
Let's see.
262
00:08:39,862 --> 00:08:42,740
That, that...
263
00:08:42,823 --> 00:08:43,950
[knocking]
264
00:08:44,033 --> 00:08:45,618
Hi.
265
00:08:45,701 --> 00:08:47,411
While you're gone, I will be
turning the heat up to 68
266
00:08:47,495 --> 00:08:48,287
'cause I've started
shivering so hard,
267
00:08:48,371 --> 00:08:50,206
my arm hair is getting thicker.
268
00:08:50,289 --> 00:08:52,667
I need the thermostat passcode.
269
00:08:52,750 --> 00:08:54,752
No, no, a room should be
the same temperature
270
00:08:54,835 --> 00:08:56,295
as a white wine fridge.
271
00:08:56,379 --> 00:08:58,130
Keeps your metabolism
on its toes.
272
00:08:58,214 --> 00:09:00,466
So what do you think,
this or this?
273
00:09:00,549 --> 00:09:03,094
I mean, which is better
for a colonoscopy prep party?
274
00:09:03,177 --> 00:09:03,803
I don't know.
Is it too sparkly?
275
00:09:03,886 --> 00:09:06,639
I just...
276
00:09:06,722 --> 00:09:08,265
I don't know, maybe...
I'll just...
277
00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:09,849
- should go with what I have on.
- [laughs]
278
00:09:09,933 --> 00:09:12,686
I'm so shocked
that you care this much.
279
00:09:12,769 --> 00:09:13,979
Oh, you don't understand.
280
00:09:14,062 --> 00:09:15,814
I've always idolized them.
281
00:09:15,897 --> 00:09:19,484
When I was first starting in
stand-up, they were the guys.
282
00:09:19,567 --> 00:09:20,944
OK, but weren't you,
like, the girl?
283
00:09:21,027 --> 00:09:22,320
Oh, no, no.
284
00:09:22,404 --> 00:09:26,157
I mean, I could fill seats,
you know,
285
00:09:26,241 --> 00:09:28,201
but they thought it was
because of my sitcom, you know,
286
00:09:28,285 --> 00:09:31,496
or the fire.
287
00:09:31,580 --> 00:09:36,626
I was never seen as legit
by guys like them.
288
00:09:36,710 --> 00:09:38,585
And now they want you to
clean out your colon with them.
289
00:09:38,669 --> 00:09:40,004
Dreams really do come true.
290
00:09:40,087 --> 00:09:41,171
- I know!
- [laughs]
291
00:09:41,255 --> 00:09:45,426
Isn't it fantastic?
292
00:09:45,509 --> 00:09:47,845
Can I just get a blanket?
293
00:09:47,928 --> 00:09:54,351
♪ ♪
294
00:09:54,435 --> 00:09:56,353
Yeah. Yeah, well, she can go...
295
00:09:56,437 --> 00:09:59,690
they can go to hell
for all I care.
296
00:09:59,773 --> 00:10:01,025
OK, bye-bye.
297
00:10:01,108 --> 00:10:02,026
Hey, hey, hey.
This is our court.
298
00:10:02,109 --> 00:10:04,695
Oh, Johnny?
299
00:10:04,778 --> 00:10:06,697
Jimmy LuSaque, Jr.
We met at JFL.
300
00:10:06,780 --> 00:10:08,114
You told me you had sex
with my dad.
301
00:10:08,197 --> 00:10:09,782
Oh, right. This is our court.
302
00:10:09,866 --> 00:10:11,743
Oh, I must have
accidentally booked this
303
00:10:11,826 --> 00:10:13,536
for Tuesday instead of Thursday.
304
00:10:13,619 --> 00:10:14,704
This always happens... you put
a T down in the calendar,
305
00:10:14,787 --> 00:10:17,415
and you're like, was that
for Tuesday or Thursday?
306
00:10:17,498 --> 00:10:20,084
- Does that ever happen to you?
- No.
307
00:10:20,168 --> 00:10:21,961
Honestly, I have the same
problem with trying to r...
308
00:10:22,045 --> 00:10:23,629
Damn it, this sucks,
'cause, you know,
309
00:10:23,713 --> 00:10:26,090
Jimmy here was gonna help me
with my technique.
310
00:10:26,174 --> 00:10:28,551
He's really amazing.
He's really, really good.
311
00:10:28,634 --> 00:10:30,219
Really? You don't really have
a pickleball body.
312
00:10:30,303 --> 00:10:32,555
He's got a pickleball body.
313
00:10:32,638 --> 00:10:34,015
- It's in his bones.
- [clears throat]
314
00:10:34,098 --> 00:10:35,683
[chuckles] He's a tennis star.
315
00:10:35,767 --> 00:10:37,768
You know, my dad hired him
to give me lessons one summer,
316
00:10:37,851 --> 00:10:40,228
and it's probably one of the
best memories of my childhood.
317
00:10:40,312 --> 00:10:41,063
- It was?
- Mm-hmm.
318
00:10:41,146 --> 00:10:42,314
You're that good?
319
00:10:42,397 --> 00:10:45,067
Yeah, he played tennis at Brown.
320
00:10:45,150 --> 00:10:46,360
I did.
321
00:10:46,443 --> 00:10:47,986
Well, maybe we
should play doubles.
322
00:10:48,070 --> 00:10:48,779
I love a little competition,
323
00:10:48,862 --> 00:10:51,573
but I hate people
who waste my time.
324
00:10:51,656 --> 00:10:53,617
Peter Thiel?
Like playing with Helen Keller
325
00:10:53,700 --> 00:10:55,410
without the star power.
326
00:10:55,494 --> 00:10:56,244
Wow, well, I'm certainly
better than that.
327
00:10:56,328 --> 00:10:58,705
She was blind, deaf, and mute.
328
00:10:58,789 --> 00:11:00,248
Jimmy.
329
00:11:00,332 --> 00:11:01,750
By the way, I'm Beth.
I work with Winnie.
330
00:11:01,833 --> 00:11:03,752
We play for money.
What do you say?
331
00:11:03,835 --> 00:11:04,920
Grand a game?
332
00:11:05,003 --> 00:11:06,296
- Holy hell, OK.
- Wow.
333
00:11:06,379 --> 00:11:07,755
- Sure, yeah, absolutely.
- Great.
334
00:11:07,838 --> 00:11:08,964
It's just money, and we got it.
335
00:11:09,048 --> 00:11:10,424
Sure thing. I like it.
336
00:11:10,508 --> 00:11:11,634
- [clears throat]
- That sounds good to me.
337
00:11:11,717 --> 00:11:13,594
Google the rules. Google the rules.
338
00:11:13,677 --> 00:11:19,683
♪ ♪
339
00:11:21,352 --> 00:11:23,813
- Hey.
- This is Ava.
340
00:11:23,896 --> 00:11:25,481
- Hey, nice to meet you guys.
- Hey.
341
00:11:25,564 --> 00:11:26,690
- Hi.
- Hey!
342
00:11:26,774 --> 00:11:28,776
Thank God you got us a white.
343
00:11:28,859 --> 00:11:31,612
What? Oh, yeah.
I'm a white person, yeah.
344
00:11:31,696 --> 00:11:33,823
We got a strong team,
but we have some blind spots.
345
00:11:33,906 --> 00:11:35,449
- Mm-hmm.
- Last week, we lost
346
00:11:35,533 --> 00:11:37,450
on a question
about natural wine.
347
00:11:37,534 --> 00:11:39,494
Oh, I love natural wine.
348
00:11:39,577 --> 00:11:41,496
[mockingly]
Oh, I love natural wine.
349
00:11:41,579 --> 00:11:43,581
We gon' mop the floor
with these motherfuckers.
350
00:11:43,665 --> 00:11:46,668
[laughter]
351
00:11:46,751 --> 00:11:49,796
[muffled laughter, chatter]
352
00:11:49,879 --> 00:11:51,381
[doorbell rings]
353
00:11:51,464 --> 00:11:54,384
[bright music]
354
00:11:54,467 --> 00:11:55,635
♪ ♪
355
00:11:55,718 --> 00:11:57,262
- Ho-ho!
- Henry!
356
00:11:57,345 --> 00:11:59,180
Well, if it isn't
our very own "It Girl."
357
00:11:59,264 --> 00:12:00,181
Oh, I like that.
358
00:12:00,265 --> 00:12:03,476
Ah, Terry, Cliff, hi!
359
00:12:03,560 --> 00:12:05,103
Aw, good to see you, Deb.
360
00:12:05,186 --> 00:12:06,520
- Oh, my God, you too.
- You look fantastic.
361
00:12:06,603 --> 00:12:08,439
Thank you.
362
00:12:08,522 --> 00:12:10,107
Now, are you ready
for my famous laxa-tini?
363
00:12:10,190 --> 00:12:11,817
- Oh, boy.
- You might be used to vodka,
364
00:12:11,900 --> 00:12:15,237
but tonight you're getting
magnesium sulfate straight up.
365
00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:17,614
- Shaken, not stirred, I hope.
- [laughs]
366
00:12:17,698 --> 00:12:19,825
May I take your bag,
Miss Special of the Year?
367
00:12:19,908 --> 00:12:20,784
- Oh, thank you.
- Mm-hmm.
368
00:12:20,868 --> 00:12:23,412
Her bag, my jokes...
you take everything.
369
00:12:23,495 --> 00:12:25,456
All right, let it go, Cliff.
370
00:12:25,539 --> 00:12:27,458
There are six bathrooms.
371
00:12:27,541 --> 00:12:29,293
But if you can't make it,
372
00:12:29,376 --> 00:12:32,838
there's a really ugly vase
on the kitchen counter.
373
00:12:32,921 --> 00:12:34,339
- No, it's deep.
- [laughs]
374
00:12:34,423 --> 00:12:36,716
- It'll work.
- [laughing] Oh, my.
375
00:12:36,799 --> 00:12:39,760
[dramatic music]
376
00:12:39,844 --> 00:12:41,095
♪ ♪
377
00:12:41,179 --> 00:12:43,181
Mine.
378
00:12:45,266 --> 00:12:47,685
Beth.
379
00:12:47,768 --> 00:12:49,520
Mine!
380
00:12:49,604 --> 00:12:52,482
[all grunting]
381
00:12:52,565 --> 00:12:54,108
Mine!
382
00:12:54,192 --> 00:12:56,194
- Oh, my God.
- Boom goes the dynamite.
383
00:12:56,277 --> 00:12:58,029
- How's my ass taste?
- That's...
384
00:12:58,112 --> 00:12:59,489
$10 grand, you beta fuck.
385
00:12:59,572 --> 00:13:01,032
I'm sorry.
I get very competitive.
386
00:13:01,115 --> 00:13:02,200
- But it is $10 grand.
- [exhales heavily]
387
00:13:02,283 --> 00:13:03,576
We have to go.
388
00:13:03,659 --> 00:13:05,952
We don't have
that kind of money.
389
00:13:08,622 --> 00:13:10,707
- Double or nothing?
- [scoffs]
390
00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,501
Oh, look who grew some foreskin.
391
00:13:12,584 --> 00:13:15,170
I like it.
Let's go.
392
00:13:15,253 --> 00:13:18,965
Oh, my God, help us all.
393
00:13:19,049 --> 00:13:21,092
[rock music playing
over speakers]
394
00:13:21,176 --> 00:13:23,386
♪ ♪
395
00:13:23,470 --> 00:13:24,846
Hello!
396
00:13:24,930 --> 00:13:27,182
- Wh...
- Oh, shit. Ray?
397
00:13:27,265 --> 00:13:28,642
Oh, my God.
398
00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:30,018
Dude!
399
00:13:30,101 --> 00:13:32,395
King of the Palmetto front desk.
400
00:13:32,479 --> 00:13:33,688
What's up, my man?
401
00:13:33,772 --> 00:13:35,189
How are you?
402
00:13:35,272 --> 00:13:36,899
So you're back in Vegas?
403
00:13:36,982 --> 00:13:38,859
Just for a little. I live in LA.
404
00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:41,737
I'm on hiatus from working
on that show "On The Contrary."
405
00:13:41,820 --> 00:13:44,448
Oh, yeah.
That show used to be funny.
406
00:13:44,532 --> 00:13:46,283
Thanks. [chuckles]
407
00:13:46,367 --> 00:13:47,409
Are you here for trivia?
408
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:48,911
Am I here for trivia?
409
00:13:48,994 --> 00:13:49,745
Yeah, I'm a legend
around these parts.
410
00:13:49,828 --> 00:13:52,289
My team Quiz Khalifa
was disbanded
411
00:13:52,373 --> 00:13:53,791
'cause we won too much,
412
00:13:53,874 --> 00:13:56,168
so now I'm with
O'trivia Newton-John.
413
00:13:56,252 --> 00:13:57,503
Oh, that's cool.
414
00:13:57,586 --> 00:13:59,338
Yeah, it's my first time.
415
00:13:59,421 --> 00:14:00,881
My friend Marcus invited me.
416
00:14:00,965 --> 00:14:01,966
Wait, you're here with SWA?
417
00:14:02,049 --> 00:14:03,592
SWA?
418
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:06,302
Yeah, Sisters with Answers.
419
00:14:06,386 --> 00:14:08,137
I hate them.
We hate them.
420
00:14:08,221 --> 00:14:09,597
Marcus, are you wearing
an Apple Watch, dude?
421
00:14:09,681 --> 00:14:12,433
Raymond, it is on airplane mode.
422
00:14:12,517 --> 00:14:13,601
OK, you know the rules, though:
423
00:14:13,685 --> 00:14:15,728
no smartwatches, no smartphones.
424
00:14:15,812 --> 00:14:17,021
You know, you can rattle off
425
00:14:17,105 --> 00:14:18,064
about the rules all you want to.
426
00:14:18,147 --> 00:14:20,775
You still don't know
the capital of South Dakota.
427
00:14:20,858 --> 00:14:23,111
- Bismarck?
- Is it?
428
00:14:23,194 --> 00:14:24,779
It i...
429
00:14:24,862 --> 00:14:26,239
oh, fuck, that's North Dakota.
430
00:14:26,322 --> 00:14:26,906
Shit.
431
00:14:26,990 --> 00:14:28,992
Jesus Christ. [chuckles]
432
00:14:29,075 --> 00:14:31,661
- All right, see you on the ice.
- Hello!
433
00:14:31,744 --> 00:14:34,246
You know, I work
in customer service too,
434
00:14:34,329 --> 00:14:35,789
and this is dog shit.
435
00:14:35,872 --> 00:14:37,082
- [laughter]
- You did not!
436
00:14:37,165 --> 00:14:38,625
- I did.
- No, you did not!
437
00:14:38,709 --> 00:14:39,251
- Did it backwards.
- Backwards!
438
00:14:39,334 --> 00:14:41,795
[vocalizing]
439
00:14:41,878 --> 00:14:43,213
- Oh!
- Oh!
440
00:14:43,297 --> 00:14:44,590
[vocalizing]
441
00:14:44,673 --> 00:14:45,674
Oh, boy.
442
00:14:45,757 --> 00:14:48,135
You are gonna hate this.
443
00:14:48,218 --> 00:14:50,804
[all groaning]
444
00:14:50,887 --> 00:14:55,726
To talking shit
and to making it too.
445
00:14:55,809 --> 00:14:58,186
Down one hatch and out another.
446
00:14:58,270 --> 00:15:00,188
Ugh.
447
00:15:01,815 --> 00:15:04,567
- Oh, God!
- [all groaning]
448
00:15:04,650 --> 00:15:07,820
I can't believe
you did 40 dates last year.
449
00:15:07,903 --> 00:15:08,487
I got to give you
a lot of credit.
450
00:15:08,571 --> 00:15:10,781
I couldn't do that now.
451
00:15:10,865 --> 00:15:12,700
Oh, don't
sell yourself short, Terry.
452
00:15:12,783 --> 00:15:14,160
You couldn't sell out
that many venues
453
00:15:14,243 --> 00:15:14,952
when you were young either.
454
00:15:15,036 --> 00:15:17,413
- [laughter]
- All right, all right.
455
00:15:17,496 --> 00:15:20,791
Had I known that you
were going to roast Terry,
456
00:15:20,875 --> 00:15:22,126
I would have invited you
years ago.
457
00:15:22,209 --> 00:15:24,837
[laughter]
458
00:15:24,920 --> 00:15:26,339
Deborah, I saw you
on late night.
459
00:15:26,422 --> 00:15:27,965
You were fantastic.
460
00:15:28,049 --> 00:15:29,634
Oh, thanks.
461
00:15:29,717 --> 00:15:30,676
Yeah, I heard that Danby kid's
462
00:15:30,760 --> 00:15:33,595
probably gonna be the next host.
463
00:15:33,678 --> 00:15:34,387
I don't get him.
464
00:15:34,471 --> 00:15:36,848
I mean, how old is he?
465
00:15:36,931 --> 00:15:39,017
I mean, not even 40, lucky fuck.
466
00:15:39,100 --> 00:15:41,686
He's fine, but he never would
have made it back in the day.
467
00:15:41,770 --> 00:15:44,522
- Mm-mm, mm-mm.
- No, no.
468
00:15:44,606 --> 00:15:46,107
Eh, he's not that good.
469
00:15:46,191 --> 00:15:47,484
If they wanted to hire
somebody unfunny,
470
00:15:47,567 --> 00:15:48,526
they could hire him.
471
00:15:48,610 --> 00:15:49,819
Hey, hey, hey!
472
00:15:49,903 --> 00:15:51,237
I was just nice to you.
473
00:15:51,321 --> 00:15:52,656
OK, OK.
You have to pay the price.
474
00:15:52,739 --> 00:15:53,323
- No, no, no, no!
- Come on. Come on.
475
00:15:53,406 --> 00:15:55,950
- Ah, God!
- Ah!
476
00:15:56,034 --> 00:15:57,202
Oh, my God.
477
00:15:57,285 --> 00:15:58,036
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
478
00:15:58,119 --> 00:15:59,371
The answer
to question number five
479
00:15:59,454 --> 00:16:01,956
is Kylie Minogue.
480
00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:04,375
- Yes, baby!
- [phone chimes]
481
00:16:04,458 --> 00:16:05,793
Question six was Juneau, Alaska.
482
00:16:05,876 --> 00:16:07,419
Killing it! Killing it.
483
00:16:07,503 --> 00:16:09,129
- Whoo-hoo!
- Yes.
484
00:16:09,213 --> 00:16:09,713
And the answer to question seven
485
00:16:09,797 --> 00:16:13,050
was the film "Frances Ha."
486
00:16:13,133 --> 00:16:14,718
- Yes!
- Good girl.
487
00:16:14,802 --> 00:16:17,054
...I'm a Baumbach-head, dude.
488
00:16:17,137 --> 00:16:17,638
Know his whole oeuvre.
489
00:16:17,721 --> 00:16:19,890
The leaders are still
490
00:16:19,973 --> 00:16:22,309
Sisters with Answers
with 30 points...
491
00:16:22,393 --> 00:16:23,727
- [all cheering]
- That's right.
492
00:16:23,811 --> 00:16:25,896
Followed by O'trivia Newton-John
493
00:16:25,979 --> 00:16:27,981
- with 29 points...
- Fuck you, bitch.
494
00:16:28,065 --> 00:16:29,566
[blows raspberry]
[phone chimes]
495
00:16:29,650 --> 00:16:31,985
And the Corn Cob Boys
with 25 points.
496
00:16:32,068 --> 00:16:34,195
So round five is gonna be
a sports round.
497
00:16:34,278 --> 00:16:35,279
Wait, violation. Phone violation.
498
00:16:35,363 --> 00:16:38,074
Ava Daniels on SWA,
she's using her phone to cheat.
499
00:16:38,157 --> 00:16:39,575
- No.
- OK, OK, she's new.
500
00:16:39,659 --> 00:16:41,119
No, she was warned.
501
00:16:41,202 --> 00:16:42,078
- I warned her.
- OK, everybody calm down.
502
00:16:42,161 --> 00:16:44,247
All right, so, SWA,
you were on your phone.
503
00:16:44,330 --> 00:16:45,373
That's gonna be
a five-point penalty.
504
00:16:45,456 --> 00:16:46,874
- Oh!
- I'm sorry.
505
00:16:46,958 --> 00:16:48,543
I'm still connected
to the Ring cam
506
00:16:48,626 --> 00:16:50,420
at my girlfriend's house,
and she's having a party.
507
00:16:50,503 --> 00:16:51,421
People keep buzzing the door.
I'm just letting them in.
508
00:16:51,504 --> 00:16:53,297
- Girl.
- Ava?
509
00:16:53,381 --> 00:16:55,508
Oh, shit.
510
00:16:55,591 --> 00:16:57,260
- Hi.
- Wow.
511
00:16:57,343 --> 00:16:57,760
Are you kidding me?
512
00:16:57,844 --> 00:16:59,262
OK, I'm going outside.
513
00:16:59,345 --> 00:17:01,389
Jesus.
514
00:17:04,933 --> 00:17:06,601
What the fuck, Ava?
515
00:17:06,685 --> 00:17:07,602
Why are you letting people
into my house?
516
00:17:07,686 --> 00:17:10,522
It kept buzzing on my phone.
517
00:17:10,605 --> 00:17:11,940
And I could say
that you not creating
518
00:17:12,023 --> 00:17:13,442
a party protocol
that didn't involve
519
00:17:13,525 --> 00:17:14,735
the Ring cam
is disrespectful to me.
520
00:17:14,818 --> 00:17:16,570
Have you been spying on me
521
00:17:16,653 --> 00:17:19,281
through our camera?
522
00:17:19,364 --> 00:17:22,909
No, I have been here
living my life, having a phone.
523
00:17:22,993 --> 00:17:23,827
And occasionally
did I check to make sure
524
00:17:23,910 --> 00:17:25,454
you didn't leave
the palo santo burning?
525
00:17:25,537 --> 00:17:27,956
Yes, it's possible.
526
00:17:28,040 --> 00:17:29,541
Oh, my God.
527
00:17:29,624 --> 00:17:31,542
OK. Jesus, I'm sorry.
528
00:17:31,625 --> 00:17:33,377
I'll delete it, but it's just
gonna be annoying
529
00:17:33,461 --> 00:17:35,129
to re-log in when I get home.
530
00:17:37,256 --> 00:17:40,801
I don't think
you're gonna be re-logging in.
531
00:17:40,885 --> 00:17:42,803
What do you mean
I'm not gonna re-log in
532
00:17:42,887 --> 00:17:44,388
to our doorbell app?
533
00:17:44,472 --> 00:17:46,474
I just think
this space has felt...
534
00:17:46,557 --> 00:17:48,642
really right for me.
535
00:17:48,726 --> 00:17:51,562
And I'm just not sure...
536
00:17:51,645 --> 00:17:53,606
I'm sure. I'm very sure.
537
00:17:53,689 --> 00:17:55,065
I want to be with you.
538
00:17:55,649 --> 00:17:57,610
Then be with me.
539
00:17:57,693 --> 00:18:01,070
Come to Iceland.
540
00:18:01,154 --> 00:18:03,156
I... [sighs]
541
00:18:03,239 --> 00:18:04,657
We're just... it's...
542
00:18:04,741 --> 00:18:05,492
There's my answer.
543
00:18:05,575 --> 00:18:07,535
[somber music]
544
00:18:07,619 --> 00:18:10,455
I think this is over.
545
00:18:10,538 --> 00:18:12,332
[scoffs] No. Ruby...
546
00:18:12,415 --> 00:18:14,375
Bye, Ava.
547
00:18:14,459 --> 00:18:18,671
♪ ♪
548
00:18:18,755 --> 00:18:21,883
[tense music]
549
00:18:21,966 --> 00:18:24,344
♪ ♪
550
00:18:24,427 --> 00:18:26,846
[sighs] Great shot.
551
00:18:26,930 --> 00:18:28,306
Don't say that.
552
00:18:28,389 --> 00:18:29,682
Why would you say that?
553
00:18:29,766 --> 00:18:33,185
[grunting]
554
00:18:33,268 --> 00:18:35,354
- Oh.
- You got to come up on those.
555
00:18:35,437 --> 00:18:37,064
- I beg your pardon?
- You got to come up on those.
556
00:18:37,147 --> 00:18:38,148
Oh, my God.
557
00:18:38,232 --> 00:18:40,484
Mine!
558
00:18:40,567 --> 00:18:41,944
- [coughs]
- Yes!
559
00:18:42,027 --> 00:18:42,736
- Yeah!
- both: Whoo!
560
00:18:42,820 --> 00:18:44,655
You got to come up on those.
561
00:18:44,738 --> 00:18:46,114
There we go. Boom!
562
00:18:46,198 --> 00:18:47,866
Oh, Jesus. Ow.
563
00:18:47,950 --> 00:18:50,828
Oh, you didn't like that, huh?
564
00:18:50,911 --> 00:18:52,663
Match point for you guys.
565
00:18:52,746 --> 00:18:54,081
We know, Beth.
566
00:18:54,164 --> 00:18:56,208
Jesus fuck!
567
00:18:56,291 --> 00:18:57,459
This is exactly
why I divorced your ass.
568
00:18:57,543 --> 00:19:00,211
I know. God.
569
00:19:06,300 --> 00:19:07,343
[clears throat]
570
00:19:08,803 --> 00:19:10,847
Hey, what's going on?
You OK?
571
00:19:10,930 --> 00:19:11,722
Jimmy, I feel like
I'm really scared.
572
00:19:11,806 --> 00:19:13,850
My back's, like, tensing up.
573
00:19:13,933 --> 00:19:15,309
You know I'm the weakest link.
574
00:19:15,393 --> 00:19:15,977
I feel like I'm gonna
mess this up.
575
00:19:16,060 --> 00:19:18,229
Hey, you got a great serve.
576
00:19:18,312 --> 00:19:19,564
All you have to do
is get it over the net.
577
00:19:19,647 --> 00:19:19,981
And if it comes to you, dink it.
578
00:19:20,064 --> 00:19:22,066
OK. Dink it.
579
00:19:22,149 --> 00:19:23,860
Dink it, and I'll take care
of the rest, OK?
580
00:19:23,943 --> 00:19:26,362
- OK.
- All right, you got this.
581
00:19:26,445 --> 00:19:26,737
- OK.
- OK.
582
00:19:26,821 --> 00:19:28,573
[chuckles]
583
00:19:28,656 --> 00:19:31,575
Thanks.
584
00:19:31,658 --> 00:19:33,410
[exhales sharply]
585
00:19:33,493 --> 00:19:36,621
♪ ♪
586
00:19:36,705 --> 00:19:37,998
[grunts]
587
00:19:38,081 --> 00:19:39,374
♪ ♪
588
00:19:39,457 --> 00:19:41,668
[grunts]
589
00:19:41,751 --> 00:19:43,545
- [grunts]
- Beth.
590
00:19:43,628 --> 00:19:44,754
[grunts]
591
00:19:44,838 --> 00:19:47,090
- Nice dink!
- Mine!
592
00:19:47,173 --> 00:19:49,759
♪ ♪
593
00:19:49,843 --> 00:19:51,052
- [grunts] Yeah!
- Yes!
594
00:19:51,136 --> 00:19:52,762
- How's my ass taste?
- Whoo!
595
00:19:52,846 --> 00:19:54,723
Motherfucker!
596
00:19:54,806 --> 00:19:56,433
- Yes! We won nothing.
- That was amazing.
597
00:19:56,516 --> 00:19:58,351
God, what is wrong with you?
598
00:19:58,435 --> 00:19:59,602
- Good game.
- Ugh.
599
00:19:59,685 --> 00:20:00,728
That is the best match we've had
600
00:20:00,811 --> 00:20:02,104
in months, right, Beth?
601
00:20:02,187 --> 00:20:04,440
- I guess.
- You're good, LuSaque.
602
00:20:04,523 --> 00:20:05,274
You're at Latitude, right?
603
00:20:05,357 --> 00:20:07,651
I actually left
to start my own firm.
604
00:20:07,735 --> 00:20:08,611
Deborah Vance came with us.
605
00:20:08,694 --> 00:20:10,195
Ah, she's funny.
606
00:20:10,279 --> 00:20:12,239
Good for you.
She's having a moment.
607
00:20:12,323 --> 00:20:14,116
Yeah, a moment I think you
could be taking advantage of.
608
00:20:14,199 --> 00:20:15,784
I know you need a new host
for 11:30,
609
00:20:15,868 --> 00:20:17,161
and she'd be amazing.
610
00:20:17,244 --> 00:20:18,829
- She rocks.
- I mean, she's funny
611
00:20:18,913 --> 00:20:19,914
but old-school
in the perfect way.
612
00:20:19,997 --> 00:20:21,540
She can talk to anybody and...
613
00:20:21,624 --> 00:20:22,374
Hey, you don't have
to sell me on Deborah.
614
00:20:22,458 --> 00:20:23,626
I love her.
I loved her guest spot.
615
00:20:23,709 --> 00:20:25,961
But I need someone with...
616
00:20:26,045 --> 00:20:27,796
how can I put this...
staying power.
617
00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:29,464
You said yourself in
your interview in "Variety"...
618
00:20:29,547 --> 00:20:30,757
I read it, loved it...
619
00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:31,799
that late night's on the decline
620
00:20:31,883 --> 00:20:33,509
and you need to shake it up.
621
00:20:33,593 --> 00:20:35,011
Well, Deborah's
a really noisy choice.
622
00:20:35,094 --> 00:20:36,596
She's certainly unexpected.
623
00:20:36,679 --> 00:20:37,764
But a 70-year-old woman
is a tough sell.
624
00:20:37,847 --> 00:20:40,308
Well, not to your audience.
625
00:20:40,391 --> 00:20:41,351
I mean, the majority of people
watching are over 30.
626
00:20:41,434 --> 00:20:44,145
You put someone like Jack Danby
behind that desk,
627
00:20:44,228 --> 00:20:44,979
kids aren't getting
off TikTok to watch him.
628
00:20:45,063 --> 00:20:47,357
My mom doesn't know who he is.
629
00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:49,192
But Deborah sold 4 million
physical DVDs last year.
630
00:20:49,275 --> 00:20:51,736
I mean, she's the queen
of people who can't
631
00:20:51,819 --> 00:20:53,154
- figure out their internet.
- [laughs]
632
00:20:53,237 --> 00:20:54,322
With her, you keep
the audience you have.
633
00:20:54,405 --> 00:20:57,241
Plus, you're doing something
that's never been done before.
634
00:20:57,325 --> 00:20:58,951
Jimmy, it's a good pitch,
635
00:20:59,034 --> 00:21:00,619
but I just don't think she's it.
636
00:21:00,702 --> 00:21:01,954
But I'm gonna think about it.
637
00:21:02,037 --> 00:21:03,205
You want to play
tomorrow morning?
638
00:21:03,288 --> 00:21:03,580
Like, in ten hours?
639
00:21:03,664 --> 00:21:05,624
Yeah.
640
00:21:05,707 --> 00:21:06,333
See you there, sister.
641
00:21:06,416 --> 00:21:08,085
You reserve.
See you at 7:00.
642
00:21:08,168 --> 00:21:09,628
Bye.
643
00:21:09,711 --> 00:21:12,005
We can't reserve a court
if we're nonmembers.
644
00:21:12,089 --> 00:21:13,840
Ugh, how much
does it cost to join?
645
00:21:13,924 --> 00:21:15,008
$20 grand a year apiece.
646
00:21:15,092 --> 00:21:18,262
It'd be less if we were married.
647
00:21:18,345 --> 00:21:19,096
How much less?
648
00:21:19,179 --> 00:21:21,682
OK, I hear you loud and clear.
649
00:21:21,765 --> 00:21:23,141
- No, I just want to know...
- No, no.
650
00:21:23,225 --> 00:21:24,601
It's something
you want to consider.
651
00:21:24,685 --> 00:21:25,352
- That's fine.
- We have to join now
652
00:21:25,435 --> 00:21:26,853
- is my consideration.
- OK, yeah.
653
00:21:26,937 --> 00:21:28,354
Let's talk about it.
654
00:21:28,437 --> 00:21:29,522
This is the last question.
655
00:21:29,605 --> 00:21:30,982
We could win this.
656
00:21:31,065 --> 00:21:31,857
Which Ventura, California,
swing band
657
00:21:31,941 --> 00:21:34,527
are known for their song
658
00:21:34,610 --> 00:21:36,821
"You, Me, and the Bottle
Make Three"?
659
00:21:39,281 --> 00:21:41,951
- [tearfully]
- The Big Bad Voodoo Daddies.
660
00:21:44,870 --> 00:21:47,373
Are you OK?
661
00:21:47,456 --> 00:21:49,417
No.
662
00:21:49,500 --> 00:21:51,168
And the answer
to the final question
663
00:21:51,252 --> 00:21:54,755
is Big Bad Voodoo Daddy,
singular.
664
00:21:54,839 --> 00:21:57,383
Big Bad Voodoo Daddies
will not be accepted.
665
00:21:57,466 --> 00:21:59,175
Yes!
666
00:21:59,259 --> 00:22:00,760
And that means the winner is
O'trivia Newton-John.
667
00:22:00,844 --> 00:22:03,221
- [cheering]
- [sobbing]
668
00:22:03,304 --> 00:22:05,724
That's good, Sisters
with Not Enough Answers.
669
00:22:05,807 --> 00:22:07,517
It's OK.
It's just bar trivia.
670
00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:10,270
I'm so stupid.
671
00:22:10,353 --> 00:22:13,732
- It's OK. Here.
- Here, drink.
672
00:22:13,815 --> 00:22:15,734
- Do they have food here?
- both: No.
673
00:22:15,817 --> 00:22:18,278
[sobs]
674
00:22:18,361 --> 00:22:20,613
Yes, I fly to Miami next week.
675
00:22:20,697 --> 00:22:24,576
You know, the one thing
I do love about getting old:
676
00:22:24,659 --> 00:22:25,035
boarding early.
677
00:22:25,118 --> 00:22:26,953
Oh, yeah, yeah.
678
00:22:27,037 --> 00:22:28,078
In the time it takes
for them to say,
679
00:22:28,162 --> 00:22:30,039
"Does anyone need
any assistance?"
680
00:22:30,122 --> 00:22:33,000
I can go from Usain Bolt
to Stephen Hawking.
681
00:22:33,083 --> 00:22:35,252
[laughter]
682
00:22:35,335 --> 00:22:37,129
Oh, shame on all of you,
flying commercial
683
00:22:37,212 --> 00:22:39,757
when you have the means
to fly private.
684
00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:41,967
- [laughter]
- OK, get this.
685
00:22:42,051 --> 00:22:44,386
We're having Thanksgiving
at my daughter's this year.
686
00:22:44,470 --> 00:22:47,264
And last night, she called me
to give me a heads-up
687
00:22:47,347 --> 00:22:51,268
that my 15-year-old
granddaughter is bisexual now.
688
00:22:51,351 --> 00:22:52,936
- Oh, no.
- Come on.
689
00:22:53,020 --> 00:22:54,646
Do they even know
what boys and girls are?
690
00:22:54,730 --> 00:22:57,440
She showed me a picture
of her boyfriend.
691
00:22:57,523 --> 00:22:59,025
I thought it was my second wife.
692
00:22:59,108 --> 00:23:00,943
- [laughter]
- You know, I hate that shit.
693
00:23:01,027 --> 00:23:03,321
Then they got the pansexual.
694
00:23:03,404 --> 00:23:05,782
What, they fuck skillets?
695
00:23:05,865 --> 00:23:07,992
- Pick a team. Pick a team.
- Yes. Yes.
696
00:23:08,076 --> 00:23:09,452
[laughter]
697
00:23:09,535 --> 00:23:11,788
Well, I mean,
there are an elite few
698
00:23:11,871 --> 00:23:14,332
who are attracted
to both genders
699
00:23:14,415 --> 00:23:16,125
or all genders.
700
00:23:16,209 --> 00:23:17,835
- All genders?
- All 15?
701
00:23:17,919 --> 00:23:19,128
Wait, wait, wait.
702
00:23:19,212 --> 00:23:20,755
- A-L-L?
- Are you doing a bit?
703
00:23:20,838 --> 00:23:23,007
No, no.
704
00:23:23,091 --> 00:23:25,927
I'm just saying you...
705
00:23:26,010 --> 00:23:29,054
you can't say that
all bisexuals are faking it.
706
00:23:29,137 --> 00:23:30,889
Oh, come on, Deb,
we all know most of the girls
707
00:23:30,972 --> 00:23:33,683
are doing it these days 'cause
they want a little attention.
708
00:23:33,767 --> 00:23:35,143
OK.
709
00:23:35,227 --> 00:23:38,355
Is this a bit?
710
00:23:38,438 --> 00:23:40,774
No.
711
00:23:40,857 --> 00:23:41,858
You know, for comedians,
you're all...
712
00:23:41,942 --> 00:23:43,819
a little out of touch.
713
00:23:43,902 --> 00:23:44,945
Uno.
714
00:23:45,028 --> 00:23:46,488
Excuse me.
Nature calls.
715
00:23:53,245 --> 00:23:55,330
[breathing heavily]
716
00:23:59,917 --> 00:24:03,754
[muffled chatter]
717
00:24:03,838 --> 00:24:06,173
[muffled laughter]
718
00:24:06,257 --> 00:24:08,509
So Deborah swings
both ways, huh?
719
00:24:08,592 --> 00:24:09,927
Between funny and unfunny.
720
00:24:10,010 --> 00:24:12,012
[laughter]
721
00:24:12,096 --> 00:24:13,514
Maybe she is
one of those people.
722
00:24:13,597 --> 00:24:15,349
Yeah, what a buzzkill.
723
00:24:15,432 --> 00:24:18,060
Thanks for inviting
the PC police, Henry.
724
00:24:18,144 --> 00:24:20,563
It's gonna be hard
to do a colonoscopy
725
00:24:20,646 --> 00:24:22,022
with that stick up her ass.
726
00:24:22,106 --> 00:24:25,651
[laughter]
727
00:24:25,734 --> 00:24:27,819
Shh, shh, shh.
728
00:24:27,902 --> 00:24:30,697
[Aretha Franklin's
"Evil Gal Blues"]
729
00:24:30,780 --> 00:24:36,035
♪ ♪
730
00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:38,371
♪ I'm an evil gal ♪
731
00:24:38,454 --> 00:24:42,083
♪ Don't you bother with me,
no ♪
732
00:24:42,167 --> 00:24:45,461
♪ I said I'm an evil gal ♪
733
00:24:45,545 --> 00:24:48,381
[metallic clanging]
734
00:24:58,807 --> 00:25:00,350
Don't even think about
taking that to your room.
735
00:25:00,434 --> 00:25:02,895
Eat it over the sink
like you normally do.
736
00:25:02,978 --> 00:25:03,896
I'm depressed, and I don't
want to talk to you,
737
00:25:03,979 --> 00:25:06,023
so I'm leaving.
738
00:25:06,106 --> 00:25:07,065
Well, too bad.
739
00:25:07,149 --> 00:25:08,066
I'm not talking to you either.
740
00:25:08,150 --> 00:25:10,235
You ruined my poop party!
741
00:25:10,319 --> 00:25:12,404
What? What did I do?
742
00:25:12,487 --> 00:25:14,281
Also, why are you housing
cheese like a fucking mouse?
743
00:25:14,364 --> 00:25:17,367
- It's binding!
- Not for me!
744
00:25:17,451 --> 00:25:19,703
You know, I finally
get in good with those guys,
745
00:25:19,786 --> 00:25:21,079
and I can't enjoy it
because of you.
746
00:25:21,163 --> 00:25:24,082
You got in my head.
747
00:25:24,166 --> 00:25:26,751
They said some crap
about bisexuals,
748
00:25:26,834 --> 00:25:27,668
and I couldn't let it go.
749
00:25:27,752 --> 00:25:30,296
I don't understand.
So you defended me?
750
00:25:30,379 --> 00:25:31,756
Not you.
751
00:25:31,839 --> 00:25:33,424
Other bisexuals.
752
00:25:33,507 --> 00:25:36,469
Alan Cumming and Malcolm X.
753
00:25:36,552 --> 00:25:37,428
You know,
I had to say something,
754
00:25:37,511 --> 00:25:39,764
and then it got
really uncomfortable,
755
00:25:39,847 --> 00:25:41,057
and I didn't want to stay.
756
00:25:41,140 --> 00:25:42,767
And it's all because of you!
757
00:25:42,850 --> 00:25:46,145
Well, sorry I changed
your mind about bisexuals.
758
00:25:46,229 --> 00:25:48,773
I mean, before you,
I was perfectly content
759
00:25:48,856 --> 00:25:51,275
being a gorgeous Vegas comic,
doing my thing,
760
00:25:51,359 --> 00:25:52,526
making tons of money.
761
00:25:52,610 --> 00:25:54,195
And then you come along,
762
00:25:54,278 --> 00:25:55,862
and you make me want more
for myself.
763
00:25:55,946 --> 00:25:56,988
And it's just fucking annoying!
764
00:25:57,072 --> 00:25:59,950
OK, so you're mad at me
for pushing you to be better?
765
00:26:00,033 --> 00:26:02,077
Yes. No.
766
00:26:02,160 --> 00:26:03,954
I don't know.
I don't know.
767
00:26:04,037 --> 00:26:05,372
It's just, a few years ago,
I could not have dreamt
768
00:26:05,455 --> 00:26:07,874
that I would walk out of a party
769
00:26:07,958 --> 00:26:11,253
where Henry Weeks
was saying how great I was,
770
00:26:11,336 --> 00:26:13,797
and that's what I did tonight.
771
00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:14,756
And I'm just mad at you!
772
00:26:14,839 --> 00:26:17,133
Well, I'm mad at you.
Where are you going?
773
00:26:17,217 --> 00:26:18,218
Ugh.
774
00:26:18,301 --> 00:26:19,803
The bathroom!
775
00:26:19,886 --> 00:26:21,680
Are you... is there
a bathroom right there?
776
00:26:21,763 --> 00:26:23,265
[door slams]
I've been walking
777
00:26:23,348 --> 00:26:26,225
all the way to the east wing
this whole time.
778
00:26:26,308 --> 00:26:28,644
Oh, my God.
779
00:26:28,727 --> 00:26:31,605
You know, I'm sorry
you had to leave a party.
780
00:26:31,689 --> 00:26:34,233
But I just lost a relationship
with someone I love
781
00:26:34,316 --> 00:26:35,776
to be here.
782
00:26:35,859 --> 00:26:37,861
And I'm gonna lose
all our mutual friends.
783
00:26:37,945 --> 00:26:40,114
And our facialist
is for sure gonna choose her
784
00:26:40,197 --> 00:26:43,117
'cause she said Ruby's face
was "less work" on a text
785
00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:46,912
that I saw over her shoulder.
786
00:26:46,996 --> 00:26:49,915
[sighs]
And that sucks.
787
00:26:49,999 --> 00:26:51,917
And it's all because
I came back here.
788
00:26:52,001 --> 00:26:54,043
[toilet flushes]
789
00:26:54,127 --> 00:26:55,336
Well, you didn't have
to come back!
790
00:26:55,420 --> 00:26:58,006
- [water running]
- Yes, I did.
791
00:26:58,089 --> 00:26:59,799
Because I wanted to.
792
00:26:59,882 --> 00:27:02,844
I wanted to be here with you
'cause you're in my head.
793
00:27:04,762 --> 00:27:07,265
Yeah, well, I'm sorry, I guess.
794
00:27:07,348 --> 00:27:09,017
I don't know what to tell you.
795
00:27:09,100 --> 00:27:11,269
[scoffs] I don't know either.
796
00:27:11,352 --> 00:27:12,645
All I know is,
we better get this thing,
797
00:27:12,729 --> 00:27:14,689
'cause it comes
at great personal cost
798
00:27:14,772 --> 00:27:17,025
to repair the trauma
of your pilot not going
799
00:27:17,108 --> 00:27:19,027
during the Carter
administration.
800
00:27:19,110 --> 00:27:20,528
That's not why I want it.
801
00:27:20,611 --> 00:27:23,530
I've wanted it
since I was a kid.
802
00:27:23,613 --> 00:27:24,656
You have?
803
00:27:24,740 --> 00:27:26,325
Yes.
804
00:27:26,408 --> 00:27:28,577
Well, cool your parents
let you stay up that late.
805
00:27:28,660 --> 00:27:30,412
My mom wouldn't let me
watch "Ren & Stimpy"
806
00:27:30,495 --> 00:27:32,205
'cause of all
the close-ups of zits.
807
00:27:32,289 --> 00:27:33,665
Yeah, well,
808
00:27:33,749 --> 00:27:37,127
you know, my house
wasn't real big on rules.
809
00:27:38,295 --> 00:27:41,631
My dad was a drinker.
810
00:27:41,715 --> 00:27:43,717
The later it got,
the worse it got.
811
00:27:46,094 --> 00:27:47,554
Except when Johnny Carson
came on.
812
00:27:49,681 --> 00:27:52,059
He was funny enough
that he'd distract him,
813
00:27:52,142 --> 00:27:54,101
and he'd laugh.
814
00:27:55,728 --> 00:27:58,230
And we'd all laugh.
815
00:27:58,314 --> 00:28:01,484
It was...
816
00:28:01,567 --> 00:28:04,987
I don't know, it was nice.
817
00:28:08,908 --> 00:28:10,910
So all I ever wanted was to,
818
00:28:10,993 --> 00:28:13,454
you know, live in that hour.
819
00:28:16,665 --> 00:28:18,501
You never talk
about your parents.
820
00:28:18,584 --> 00:28:19,794
Well, it makes you sound old
821
00:28:19,877 --> 00:28:20,169
when you say your parents
are dead.
822
00:28:20,252 --> 00:28:23,088
[chuckles]
823
00:28:23,171 --> 00:28:25,757
Why don't you just come out
and say why you want it?
824
00:28:25,840 --> 00:28:27,509
I think if people knew
how personal this is for you,
825
00:28:27,592 --> 00:28:30,387
that would be really compelling.
826
00:28:30,470 --> 00:28:31,346
Oh, God, no,
I can't even say I want it,
827
00:28:31,429 --> 00:28:33,932
let alone all that other stuff.
828
00:28:34,015 --> 00:28:37,769
OK, sure, but I think
you can say what you want.
829
00:28:37,852 --> 00:28:38,978
You've never played
by the rules.
830
00:28:39,062 --> 00:28:41,439
And I don't think you have
the luxury of playing this safe
831
00:28:41,523 --> 00:28:43,566
'cause you're not
the safe choice.
832
00:28:43,650 --> 00:28:44,651
Can't risk it.
833
00:28:44,734 --> 00:28:45,735
You're all about risk.
834
00:28:45,819 --> 00:28:50,323
You self-financed your special
and sold it on QVC.
835
00:28:50,407 --> 00:28:52,658
That was before.
836
00:28:52,741 --> 00:28:55,869
I've got all these eyes
on me now.
837
00:28:55,953 --> 00:28:59,665
I'm finally respected,
respectable.
838
00:29:01,417 --> 00:29:05,254
If I say I want it
and then I don't get it
839
00:29:05,337 --> 00:29:10,134
for the second time,
840
00:29:10,217 --> 00:29:11,969
then I'll be a joke again.
841
00:29:13,554 --> 00:29:17,599
And that would just be too much.
842
00:29:17,683 --> 00:29:19,309
Would it?
843
00:29:19,393 --> 00:29:21,186
I mean, who are you worried
about being a joke to?
844
00:29:21,270 --> 00:29:22,145
The guys whose respect
you wanted most of all,
845
00:29:22,228 --> 00:29:25,898
you just rejected.
846
00:29:25,982 --> 00:29:28,985
Deborah, your superpower
is that you're shameless.
847
00:29:29,068 --> 00:29:30,987
And having shame about the thing
848
00:29:31,070 --> 00:29:33,156
you want most in the world
849
00:29:33,239 --> 00:29:34,449
isn't you.
850
00:29:35,616 --> 00:29:40,121
You think
that's a terrible idea.
851
00:29:40,204 --> 00:29:42,832
No, the cheese isn't working.
852
00:29:42,915 --> 00:29:43,666
[laughs]
853
00:29:43,749 --> 00:29:47,378
[upbeat marching band
music playing]
854
00:29:47,462 --> 00:29:50,339
♪ ♪
855
00:29:50,423 --> 00:29:52,048
All right, well, next up
856
00:29:52,132 --> 00:29:53,717
is the Sulfur Springs
High School marching band.
857
00:29:53,800 --> 00:29:56,761
Careful, kids,
those New York City potholes
858
00:29:56,845 --> 00:29:59,055
can be a doozy.
[both laugh]
859
00:29:59,139 --> 00:30:00,182
Well, not to steal
their thunder, Mario,
860
00:30:00,265 --> 00:30:03,018
but can I make an announcement
here on live television?
861
00:30:03,101 --> 00:30:04,603
Thanks.
862
00:30:04,686 --> 00:30:07,689
America, I am ready
to be the next woman
863
00:30:07,772 --> 00:30:09,107
on network late night.
864
00:30:09,191 --> 00:30:10,692
That's right.
865
00:30:10,775 --> 00:30:13,361
I want to be the next host
of "The Late Show."
866
00:30:13,445 --> 00:30:15,530
I may be a woman
and I may be a natural blonde,
867
00:30:15,614 --> 00:30:18,366
but I am the best person
for the job.
868
00:30:18,450 --> 00:30:19,743
I'm funny.
I'm vivacious.
869
00:30:19,826 --> 00:30:22,286
And I'm the only person
who can get away
870
00:30:22,369 --> 00:30:24,538
with asking a man,
"Cut or uncut?"
871
00:30:24,622 --> 00:30:26,540
Mario?
872
00:30:26,624 --> 00:30:27,875
Uncut.
873
00:30:27,958 --> 00:30:29,835
Thought so.
874
00:30:29,919 --> 00:30:30,628
OK.
875
00:30:30,711 --> 00:30:33,172
And how about
that cymbal section?
876
00:30:33,255 --> 00:30:34,840
[chuckles awkwardly]
877
00:30:34,924 --> 00:30:36,634
Yeah, why don't we take
a quick commercial break?
878
00:30:36,717 --> 00:30:38,385
[Dolly Parton's
"Baby I'm Burnin'"]
879
00:30:38,469 --> 00:30:40,596
{\an8}- Did you see this?
- What?
880
00:30:40,679 --> 00:30:42,598
{\an8}Deborah Vance went rogue
on live TV
881
00:30:42,681 --> 00:30:44,892
{\an8}and announced she's gunning
to be the next woman
882
00:30:44,975 --> 00:30:46,769
{\an8}in network late night.
883
00:30:46,852 --> 00:30:47,228
{\an8}- That was bold of her.
- I loved it.
884
00:30:47,311 --> 00:30:48,479
{\an8}Good for her.
885
00:30:48,562 --> 00:30:50,730
{\an8}- I don't like her for it.
Come on.
886
00:30:50,813 --> 00:30:52,023
{\an8}Joy, you got to get over
the beef.
887
00:30:52,106 --> 00:30:52,482
{\an8}- Never.
- Oh, my God.
888
00:30:52,565 --> 00:30:54,776
{\an8}- Joy.
- What?
889
00:30:54,859 --> 00:30:56,569
{\an8}You're unbelievable.
890
00:30:56,653 --> 00:30:57,779
{\an8}Well, like it or not,
she's on the campaign trail.
891
00:30:57,862 --> 00:31:01,366
{\an8}So watch out, America.
She's coming for you.
892
00:31:01,449 --> 00:31:02,700
♪ You look at me
that way ♪
893
00:31:02,784 --> 00:31:04,702
♪ I know what your eyes say ♪
894
00:31:04,786 --> 00:31:07,497
Temps will fall across
Indianapolis late tonight.
895
00:31:07,580 --> 00:31:09,249
Speaking of late night,
wouldn't you like
896
00:31:09,332 --> 00:31:11,334
a charming gal like me
on your TV set every night
897
00:31:11,417 --> 00:31:12,835
to keep you warm and toasty?
898
00:31:12,919 --> 00:31:15,797
Oh, a Deborah burger
is very interesting to us.
899
00:31:15,880 --> 00:31:18,424
Yo, can I get a Deborah's
Dunkin' Midnight Roast?
900
00:31:18,508 --> 00:31:21,260
Welcome to Las Vegas, baby.
901
00:31:21,343 --> 00:31:23,637
Remember, what happens here
stays here,
902
00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:25,305
unless it's crabs.
903
00:31:25,389 --> 00:31:26,765
Fuck yes.
904
00:31:26,848 --> 00:31:29,309
Deb's in.
Whoo! Rock and roll!
905
00:31:29,393 --> 00:31:32,771
♪ Hot as a pistol
of flaming desire ♪
906
00:31:32,854 --> 00:31:35,440
In 20 feet, you will be
arriving at your destination.
907
00:31:35,524 --> 00:31:36,942
What a dump!
908
00:31:37,025 --> 00:31:39,111
Rinka turkey nurbler da woo-hoo
909
00:31:39,194 --> 00:31:39,778
with a chum-cha!
910
00:31:39,861 --> 00:31:42,155
Ooh be gah!
[laughter]
911
00:31:42,239 --> 00:31:44,616
I have been bugging
my manager for years.
912
00:31:44,700 --> 00:31:46,410
The only thing I've wanted
more than late night
913
00:31:46,493 --> 00:31:48,579
is to be on "Talk Stoop."
914
00:31:48,662 --> 00:31:50,454
- Right, Cara?
- [dog barks]
915
00:31:50,538 --> 00:31:53,332
♪ Hot as a pistol
of flaming desire ♪
916
00:31:53,416 --> 00:31:57,044
[tires screeching]
917
00:31:57,128 --> 00:32:00,006
- [phone chiming]
- [groans]
918
00:32:02,258 --> 00:32:05,469
[yawns]
919
00:32:05,553 --> 00:32:07,430
OK, hold on.
920
00:32:07,513 --> 00:32:08,723
You got to hear this.
921
00:32:08,806 --> 00:32:10,308
Hi, it's Winnie.
922
00:32:10,391 --> 00:32:11,767
So this morning,
I walked in on my son
923
00:32:11,851 --> 00:32:14,353
doing a Deborah Vance
makeup tutorial.
924
00:32:14,437 --> 00:32:16,314
She might have wider appeal
than I thought.
925
00:32:16,397 --> 00:32:18,482
We should talk.
Call me back.
926
00:32:18,566 --> 00:32:19,816
OK!
927
00:32:19,899 --> 00:32:21,651
- [all cheering]
- Yay! Oh, my God!
928
00:32:21,735 --> 00:32:24,446
God, of course
her kid was the key.
929
00:32:24,529 --> 00:32:26,615
Executives love
listening to their kids.
930
00:32:26,698 --> 00:32:28,491
I was actually at the sleepover
931
00:32:28,575 --> 00:32:30,076
where we decided
that Tobey Maguire
932
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:31,536
would be the next Spider-Man.
933
00:32:31,620 --> 00:32:32,662
[laughter]
934
00:32:32,746 --> 00:32:34,247
- [all cheering]
- Oh, my God!
935
00:32:34,331 --> 00:32:36,541
This is huge.
936
00:32:36,625 --> 00:32:38,209
♪ ♪
937
00:32:38,293 --> 00:32:40,670
♪ Baby, I'm burnin'
out of control ♪
938
00:32:40,754 --> 00:32:45,133
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
body and soul ♪
939
00:32:45,216 --> 00:32:48,637
♪ Hot as a pistol
of flaming desire ♪
940
00:32:48,720 --> 00:32:53,182
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
you got me on fire ♪
941
00:32:53,265 --> 00:32:54,892
♪ Baby, I'm burnin' ♪
942
00:32:54,975 --> 00:32:56,727
♪ Baby,
I'm burnin' ♪
943
00:32:56,810 --> 00:32:58,520
♪ Baby, I'm burnin' ♪
944
00:32:58,604 --> 00:33:00,522
♪ Baby,
I'm burnin' ♪
945
00:33:00,606 --> 00:33:03,984
♪ Baby, I'm burnin'
out of control ♪
946
00:33:04,068 --> 00:33:07,529
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
body and soul ♪
947
00:33:07,613 --> 00:33:10,991
♪ Hot as a pistol
of flaming desire ♪
948
00:33:11,075 --> 00:33:13,869
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
you got me on fire ♪
949
00:33:13,952 --> 00:33:18,457
♪ Baby, I'm burnin'
out of control ♪
950
00:33:18,540 --> 00:33:21,834
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
body and soul ♪
951
00:33:21,918 --> 00:33:25,630
♪ Hot as a pistol
of flaming desire ♪
952
00:33:25,713 --> 00:33:29,050
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
you got me on fire ♪
953
00:33:29,133 --> 00:33:32,720
♪ Baby, I'm burnin'
out of control ♪
954
00:33:32,804 --> 00:33:36,057
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
body and soul ♪
955
00:33:36,140 --> 00:33:39,727
♪ Hot as a pistol
of flaming desire ♪
956
00:33:39,811 --> 00:33:43,314
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
you got me on fire ♪
957
00:33:43,398 --> 00:33:46,734
♪ Baby, I'm burnin'
out of control ♪
958
00:33:46,818 --> 00:33:50,362
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
body and soul ♪
959
00:33:50,445 --> 00:33:54,241
♪ Hot as a pistol
of flaming desire ♪
960
00:33:54,324 --> 00:33:57,077
♪ Baby, I'm burnin',
you got me on fire ♪
67698
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