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[ cheering ]
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00:00:04,311 --> 00:00:07,212
ANNOUNCER:
Come on,
let's see those horns!
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Let's see those horns!
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00:00:09,550 --> 00:00:10,448
[ cheering ]
5
00:00:10,517 --> 00:00:16,353
With Dethklok's help and my
666-point business plan,
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00:00:16,423 --> 00:00:18,414
we will make this world better.
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Come on!
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00:00:21,195 --> 00:00:23,527
Let's see a pit down here.
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00:00:23,597 --> 00:00:26,498
Why do they have us right here
in front of all these dildos?
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Yeah, l mean,
we're right in front of everybody.
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lt's like they're gawkings at us
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likes a bunch of fish that can't
close their eyes.
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- Look at that guy.
- Look at that one.
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Look at that douche.
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NATHAN:
Look at that douche bag.
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00:00:36,210 --> 00:00:37,040
Look at that douche bag.
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00:00:37,111 --> 00:00:38,237
SKWlSGAAR:
Looks at that douche bag.
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00:00:38,312 --> 00:00:39,472
Looks at that douche bag.
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00:00:39,546 --> 00:00:40,376
NATHAN:
Look at that douche bag.
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00:00:40,447 --> 00:00:42,176
MURDERFACE:
Looks at that douche bag.
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Douche bag.
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Douche bag.
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All:
Douche bag.
Douche bag.
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00:00:45,586 --> 00:00:47,520
Douche bag. Douche bag.
Douche bag. Douche bag.
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00:00:47,588 --> 00:00:51,456
l'm just so irritated
by these stupid fans!
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00:00:51,525 --> 00:00:52,389
Dude, what's wrong
with you?
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00:00:52,459 --> 00:00:56,520
lt's that here we are, again,
stuck with each other.
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00:00:56,597 --> 00:00:58,224
We've got no friends.
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l know, it's just us.
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We're not friends, are we?
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No.
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Oh, god, no.
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Friends, we can't to affords to
have friends this days.
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00:01:05,539 --> 00:01:07,234
The price for fames.
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00:01:07,307 --> 00:01:08,365
A bunch of caged rats.
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That's what we are,
a bunch of caged rats
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that are also
death-metal musicians.
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Yeah, we're the rats,
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00:01:13,847 --> 00:01:16,042
and look what's on the
other side of the cage.
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Douche bags.
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00:01:17,584 --> 00:01:20,348
Yeah, what if some of
these [bleep] starts [bleep] us?
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00:01:20,421 --> 00:01:21,251
Who knows?
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00:01:21,321 --> 00:01:22,515
What if we get [bleep] with?
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00:01:22,589 --> 00:01:24,147
You know, l feel slightly,
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just slightly better knowing my
sawed-off shotgun is loaded.
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00:01:28,295 --> 00:01:32,425
Oh, l got cinnamon icing all
over my hand!
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00:01:40,441 --> 00:01:42,500
What happened back there, huh?
What was that?
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We don't know.
49
00:01:44,278 --> 00:01:46,212
We no means it.
lt was accidents.
50
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We're not at fault.
51
00:01:47,214 --> 00:01:48,476
blood bath doesn't
read well in print, all right?
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You know what l'm saying?
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We can't do anything right!
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Look, l've noticed you guys
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00:01:56,323 --> 00:01:57,722
have been down and
pouty lately.
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And l don't want to put you in
harm's way anymore,
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so l've taken the liberty of
hiring doubles
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00:02:01,528 --> 00:02:03,621
to take over for your
celebrity appearances.
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Dethklok, meet Dethklok.
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00:02:06,567 --> 00:02:09,127
♪ Do anything for Dethklok ♪
♪ Do anything for Dethklok ♪
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♪ Do anything for Dethklok ♪
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♪ Do anything for Dethklok ♪
♪ Do anything for Dethklok ♪
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♪ Dethklok! Dethklok!
Dethklok! Dethklok! ♪
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♪ l'm...ticking...for...the...
Dethklok! Dethklok! ♪
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♪ Skwisgaar Skwigelf,
taller than a tree ♪
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00:02:24,651 --> 00:02:26,619
♪ Toki Wartooth,
not a bumblebee ♪
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00:02:27,287 --> 00:02:29,551
♪ William Murderface
Murderface Murderface ♪
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♪ Pickles the drummer ♪
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00:02:30,624 --> 00:02:32,057
♪ Doodily doo, doodily doo ♪
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♪ Nathan Explosion ♪
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STAMPlNGSTON:
Gentlemen, this latest Duncan Hills
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00:02:41,735 --> 00:02:44,568
coffee store
opening has ended in a massacre.
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General Crozier?
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00:02:45,939 --> 00:02:47,463
Many innocents died.
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00:02:47,541 --> 00:02:50,339
No report of any attempt on
Dethklok's lives whatsoever.
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00:02:50,410 --> 00:02:53,868
lt means that Dethklok has
greatly improved their security.
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00:02:53,947 --> 00:02:57,439
Which is why they've employed
doubles who work for us.
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00:02:57,518 --> 00:02:59,679
These are some of our finest
soldiers.
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STAMPlNGSTON:
More interesting is the union between
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00:03:01,522 --> 00:03:03,456
Leonard Purcell and Dethklok.
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00:03:03,524 --> 00:03:06,652
They've taken their business
relationship to the next level
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00:03:06,727 --> 00:03:10,288
and stand to monopolize all
coffee shops on the planet.
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00:03:10,364 --> 00:03:12,559
Purcell has purchased the
island of Sumatra,
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00:03:12,633 --> 00:03:15,261
and Dethklok
will meet him there and perform
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on top of a dormant volcano.
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00:03:16,904 --> 00:03:20,169
CROZlER:
Our doubles will get
close to Purcell and retrieve
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00:03:20,240 --> 00:03:21,832
his secret business contracts,
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00:03:21,909 --> 00:03:25,106
which will no doubt help us to
control his growing strength.
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00:03:25,179 --> 00:03:27,374
be careful, General.
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We are here to observe.
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00:03:30,250 --> 00:03:31,683
be careful.
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00:03:33,253 --> 00:03:36,017
MURDERFACE:
Let me see if l
understand you correctly.
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00:03:36,089 --> 00:03:38,956
You expect us to cut off our
faces and then sew them
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00:03:39,026 --> 00:03:41,426
on these regular jack offs and
then resew them
95
00:03:41,495 --> 00:03:44,623
back on our own faces for
the tour?
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00:03:44,698 --> 00:03:45,995
You're a sick man.
97
00:03:46,066 --> 00:03:48,227
No, no, there will
be no face cutting.
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00:03:48,302 --> 00:03:50,133
Look at them.
They already look like you.
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00:03:50,204 --> 00:03:52,570
NATHAN:
Oh, l thought that
was, like, a coincidence.
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00:03:52,639 --> 00:03:53,606
That is coincidence.
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00:03:53,674 --> 00:03:55,699
Listen, great men
throughout history
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have used doubles,
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00:03:56,677 --> 00:03:59,510
men who needed to stay alive for
the greater good
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00:03:59,580 --> 00:04:03,243
of the people, like yourselves,
men like Winston Churchill,
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00:04:03,317 --> 00:04:04,375
Joseph Stalin --
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00:04:04,451 --> 00:04:05,543
Awesome!
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00:04:05,619 --> 00:04:06,517
l'm Stalin. l call it.
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00:04:06,587 --> 00:04:07,451
l'm Nixon.
109
00:04:07,521 --> 00:04:09,148
l wants to be bill Cosby.
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00:04:09,223 --> 00:04:10,952
No, it doesn't work that way.
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00:04:11,024 --> 00:04:12,616
We get doubles of you is what
l'm saying.
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00:04:12,693 --> 00:04:13,682
Hold on.
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00:04:13,760 --> 00:04:14,988
This guy does not look like me.
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00:04:15,062 --> 00:04:16,791
He's hideous. He's grotesque.
Look at him.
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00:04:16,863 --> 00:04:18,490
Actually,
Murderface, he --
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00:04:18,565 --> 00:04:22,023
MURDERFACE:
Look at that head,
that disgusting forehead,
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00:04:22,102 --> 00:04:27,039
that stupid-shaped hair, beady eyes,
like, stupid, flat nose,
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00:04:27,107 --> 00:04:30,804
white, hammer-ass,
chicken-pluck legs idiot.
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00:04:30,877 --> 00:04:33,846
You got to get your eyes
checked, you piece of [bleep]
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00:04:33,914 --> 00:04:35,643
the guy doesn't look like me!
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00:04:37,284 --> 00:04:39,411
Oh, god.
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00:04:39,486 --> 00:04:42,284
He looks just like me.
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00:04:47,160 --> 00:04:53,121
[ indistinct talking ]
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00:04:53,200 --> 00:04:55,464
Uh, listen,
l don't think it's a great idea
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00:04:55,535 --> 00:04:58,698
for you guys to get too close to
your doubles.
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00:04:59,673 --> 00:05:01,368
Well, l guess we
are friends all of the suddens.
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00:05:01,441 --> 00:05:03,534
Well, you just can't
have them as your friends.
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00:05:03,610 --> 00:05:05,669
Oh, he admits it,
sees?
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00:05:05,746 --> 00:05:07,043
He is a tyrants. He admits it.
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00:05:07,114 --> 00:05:09,742
Do you understand
the purpose of having a double?
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00:05:09,816 --> 00:05:11,750
Yeah, l'll take this
one, guys.
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00:05:11,818 --> 00:05:13,911
A double is like having
the best friend
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00:05:13,987 --> 00:05:16,319
you've ever had in your
whole life.
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00:05:16,390 --> 00:05:20,190
A double listens to you when no
one in this crazy world will.
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00:05:20,260 --> 00:05:23,457
A double is like having a child
and watching him grow up
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00:05:23,530 --> 00:05:25,430
and feeling that feeling of
pride
137
00:05:25,499 --> 00:05:28,127
and unyielding trust that no one
else can --
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00:05:28,201 --> 00:05:31,637
They exist so that
if someone tries to kill you,
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00:05:31,705 --> 00:05:33,332
they will be killed instead.
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00:05:33,407 --> 00:05:34,704
Whoa, what?
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00:05:34,775 --> 00:05:37,608
l mean, just thinking of those
us as dead, l mean,
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00:05:38,578 --> 00:05:40,011
l'm gonna cry.
l might seriously cry about that.
143
00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:43,516
That's why you don't get
emotionally attached, Nathan.
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00:05:43,583 --> 00:05:45,676
NATHAN:
Hey, where'd my me go?
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00:05:47,321 --> 00:05:48,583
CROZlER:
What do you have so far?
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00:05:48,655 --> 00:05:52,523
Sir, the band Dethklok will not
give us a moment to ourselves.
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00:05:52,592 --> 00:05:54,423
All they want to do is pal around.
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00:05:54,494 --> 00:05:56,257
[ bang ]
Wait, l've been spotted.
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00:05:56,330 --> 00:05:58,821
NATHAN:
Hey, me, we don't got a lot of time
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00:05:58,899 --> 00:05:59,729
before you got to go!
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00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:01,893
We've got to go pal around!
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00:06:11,845 --> 00:06:14,939
ANNOUNCER:
Well, it's a great
Duncan Hills Metal Day parade
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00:06:15,015 --> 00:06:17,279
here today
in Pasadena, California.
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00:06:17,351 --> 00:06:18,978
Dethklok looks great.
155
00:06:19,052 --> 00:06:20,314
They're looking healthy.
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00:06:20,387 --> 00:06:21,615
They're feeling good.
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00:06:21,688 --> 00:06:23,349
lt's a great day.
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00:06:23,423 --> 00:06:24,890
back to you.
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00:06:24,958 --> 00:06:26,425
[ dialing ]
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00:06:26,493 --> 00:06:28,859
Hey, we just saw
you on TV at the parade!
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00:06:28,929 --> 00:06:29,953
Hey, when you get back,
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00:06:30,030 --> 00:06:32,555
we're gonna have a surprise
party for you.
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00:06:32,632 --> 00:06:33,894
Give me the phone.
Give me the phone.
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00:06:33,967 --> 00:06:34,797
Give me the phone.
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00:06:34,868 --> 00:06:36,563
Give me the phone.
Give me the phone!
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00:06:36,636 --> 00:06:38,536
Hold on!
Here's Nathan.
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00:06:38,605 --> 00:06:41,301
Hi.
We just saw you the parade!
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00:06:41,375 --> 00:06:42,205
lt was great!
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00:06:42,275 --> 00:06:43,799
l said that already!
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00:06:43,877 --> 00:06:44,707
Oh, yeah,
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00:06:44,778 --> 00:06:46,803
we're having a party for you
when you come back.
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00:06:46,880 --> 00:06:47,869
lt's be gonna be awesome!
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00:06:47,948 --> 00:06:49,848
Ask them if they
want chocolate cake.
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00:06:49,916 --> 00:06:50,848
l will.
Hold on. Hold on.
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00:06:50,917 --> 00:06:52,782
Oh, we'll gets
the bounce house.
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00:06:52,853 --> 00:06:54,844
Tell them about the balloons!
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00:06:54,921 --> 00:06:57,549
We're gonna have
balloons!
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00:06:57,624 --> 00:06:58,556
We got to go.
Goodbye.
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00:06:58,625 --> 00:07:00,593
What are you, uh, doing,
on the phone?
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00:07:00,660 --> 00:07:01,684
You're supposed to be doing
your jobs.
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00:07:01,762 --> 00:07:04,697
Jobs?
l play bass not to have a job.
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00:07:04,765 --> 00:07:06,665
You're supposed to
be preparing for the concert.
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00:07:06,733 --> 00:07:08,792
Nathan...
you're in charge here.
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00:07:08,869 --> 00:07:10,928
How's rehearsal coming?
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00:07:11,872 --> 00:07:13,362
Oh, it's, um...
186
00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:15,601
uh...uh...
187
00:07:15,675 --> 00:07:26,574
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
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00:07:26,653 --> 00:07:27,483
Good.
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00:07:27,554 --> 00:07:28,521
[ bird chirping ]
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00:07:28,588 --> 00:07:31,716
NATHAN:
You ever think of just,
you know, giving it all up?
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00:07:31,792 --> 00:07:32,622
You know?
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00:07:32,692 --> 00:07:34,887
You mean, like,
killings yourself.
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00:07:34,961 --> 00:07:36,258
No. What?
194
00:07:36,329 --> 00:07:38,422
No, l mean, like,
stopping being big, famous,
195
00:07:38,498 --> 00:07:41,729
becoming a regular
old jack off.
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00:07:41,802 --> 00:07:43,497
And then kill yourself?
197
00:07:43,570 --> 00:07:45,663
No, no,
it's stopping being famous -- yeah,
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00:07:45,739 --> 00:07:46,865
l don't know,
you can kill yourself if you want to.
199
00:07:46,940 --> 00:07:48,931
You know, it would be great,
you know,
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00:07:49,009 --> 00:07:51,910
to walk down the street,
not be bothered for once.
201
00:07:51,978 --> 00:07:53,775
Walks where?
202
00:07:53,847 --> 00:07:54,871
l don't know.
203
00:07:54,948 --> 00:07:55,778
Walk down the street.
204
00:07:55,849 --> 00:07:56,679
To where?
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00:07:56,750 --> 00:07:58,775
To where--
l don't know, walk to the store.
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00:07:58,852 --> 00:08:00,877
Just buys it on the internet.
Haves it delivered.
207
00:08:00,954 --> 00:08:02,615
l know l can buy it on the
internet,
208
00:08:02,756 --> 00:08:04,223
but what if l want
to walk to the park
209
00:08:04,291 --> 00:08:06,088
and look at some swans, you know?
210
00:08:06,860 --> 00:08:08,088
Well, maybe you should have
thought of that
211
00:08:08,161 --> 00:08:09,059
before you
got famous.
212
00:08:09,129 --> 00:08:10,790
NATHAN:
Toki's right.
213
00:08:10,864 --> 00:08:13,424
We're here in Sumatra,
a nation built on coffee.
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00:08:13,500 --> 00:08:15,195
The Sumatrans, known as a
nervous, edgy,
215
00:08:15,268 --> 00:08:16,462
and dehydrated people,
216
00:08:16,536 --> 00:08:19,004
seem to have a calm excitement
tonight as they
217
00:08:19,072 --> 00:08:20,733
anticipate Dethklok's
performance on Condor Mountain,
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00:08:20,807 --> 00:08:23,275
the world-famous dormant
volcano,
219
00:08:23,343 --> 00:08:24,776
where 10,000 baristas
will be brewing
220
00:08:24,845 --> 00:08:27,075
the largest cup of coffee.
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00:08:35,021 --> 00:08:38,149
NATHAN:
[ singing indistinctly ]
222
00:08:46,399 --> 00:08:47,696
Ugh!
Ow. Oh.
223
00:08:47,767 --> 00:08:49,530
Get it open and hack
the briefcase.
224
00:08:49,603 --> 00:08:50,797
We need those contracts.
225
00:08:56,943 --> 00:08:59,036
♪ We fear no death ♪
226
00:09:01,014 --> 00:09:04,074
♪ We fear no death ♪
227
00:09:06,086 --> 00:09:08,748
♪ We fear no death ♪
228
00:09:08,989 --> 00:09:10,388
Hey, awesome! Dethklok!
229
00:09:10,457 --> 00:09:12,049
Can l have your autograph?
230
00:09:13,326 --> 00:09:14,884
Aaaaah!
231
00:09:34,915 --> 00:09:39,284
[ screaming ]
232
00:09:39,352 --> 00:09:41,252
l got it!
233
00:09:41,321 --> 00:09:43,312
[ screams ]
234
00:09:50,130 --> 00:09:52,963
What was thought to be a
dormant volcano erupted
235
00:09:53,033 --> 00:09:55,001
after 50,000 gallons of
Duncan Hills coffee
236
00:09:55,068 --> 00:09:55,932
was brewed inside of it.
237
00:09:56,002 --> 00:09:57,902
Thousands of fans were
incinerated.
238
00:09:57,971 --> 00:10:01,099
Rumors of Dethklok being burned
alive were greatly exaggerated,
239
00:10:01,174 --> 00:10:03,904
as the band escaped unharmed.
240
00:10:03,977 --> 00:10:06,468
Well, l'm afraid it's time
to say goodbye to your doubles.
241
00:10:06,546 --> 00:10:07,774
Toki:
Why? They still alive.
242
00:10:07,847 --> 00:10:08,939
l know they are.
243
00:10:09,015 --> 00:10:11,074
Then why do we got
to say goodbye to them?
244
00:10:11,151 --> 00:10:13,585
because, Pickles,
they no longer look like you.
245
00:10:13,653 --> 00:10:14,483
That was the point.
246
00:10:14,554 --> 00:10:15,953
Their skin is burned,
they don't even have features.
247
00:10:16,022 --> 00:10:18,490
SKWlSGAAR:
What if we burned
ourselves to looks like thems?
248
00:10:18,558 --> 00:10:21,083
Then maybes we coulds keep them.
249
00:10:21,161 --> 00:10:22,924
That would work!
You know it would!
250
00:10:22,996 --> 00:10:24,190
Come on, let's burn ourselves!
251
00:10:24,264 --> 00:10:26,357
That is out of the question,
Murderface.
252
00:10:26,433 --> 00:10:28,230
You're out of the question.
253
00:10:28,935 --> 00:10:30,732
l'm afraid it's time for you
254
00:10:30,804 --> 00:10:31,930
to say goodbye to your
doubles now.
255
00:10:32,005 --> 00:10:32,937
Let us do it.
256
00:10:33,006 --> 00:10:35,406
lt's better if they hear
it from us,
257
00:10:35,475 --> 00:10:37,966
because we're them,
after all.
258
00:10:40,280 --> 00:10:41,577
Thanks for coming, us.
259
00:10:41,648 --> 00:10:42,842
You know, there's --
260
00:10:42,916 --> 00:10:45,214
there's never an easy ways
to do this.
261
00:10:45,285 --> 00:10:47,412
but, you know, sometimes you --
262
00:10:47,487 --> 00:10:49,751
we're out of
options sometimes.
263
00:10:49,823 --> 00:10:52,121
You know business is not
personal,
264
00:10:52,192 --> 00:10:55,787
and in this case,
it is, because it's us.
265
00:10:55,862 --> 00:10:56,886
You're us, and --
266
00:10:56,963 --> 00:10:57,952
[ sighs ]
267
00:10:58,031 --> 00:10:59,293
l hate having to say this, but--
268
00:10:59,366 --> 00:11:00,765
Oh--
Let me explain.
269
00:11:00,834 --> 00:11:03,325
l got a little smoother way of
explaining it, here.
270
00:11:03,403 --> 00:11:06,099
Guys...
271
00:11:06,172 --> 00:11:08,037
it's --
272
00:11:08,108 --> 00:11:09,405
You see, the thing is that --
273
00:11:09,476 --> 00:11:10,408
[ gunshot ]
274
00:11:10,477 --> 00:11:11,307
[ thumps ]
18720
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