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1
00:01:16,979 --> 00:01:19,380
Hey girl, want some brown liquor?
2
00:01:19,660 --> 00:01:21,300
Brown liquor don't make this pussy bad.
3
00:01:22,020 --> 00:01:23,100
Tequila it is.
4
00:01:23,620 --> 00:01:24,620
Here you go.
5
00:01:33,380 --> 00:01:35,140
So what are you doing here anyway?
6
00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:36,680
What do you think I'm doing here?
7
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I'm starting in the opening thing.
8
00:01:39,300 --> 00:01:40,460
Been there, done that.
9
00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:51,040
Richie? Yeah, that makes sense. Because
you know these
10
00:01:51,040 --> 00:01:52,040
motherfuckers can't read.
11
00:01:52,540 --> 00:01:53,479
I know.
12
00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:54,880
Who goes a few ways, brother?
13
00:01:55,140 --> 00:01:59,020
Well, it's nice to... phone me here in a
super awkward way.
14
00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:03,020
Likewise, but I've gotta be honest, when
I see your profile pic, I bet you
15
00:02:03,020 --> 00:02:05,100
almost twice left because you look mad
goofy.
16
00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:09,840
But surprisingly, you know, goofy niggas
gotta be good, so here we are.
17
00:02:10,139 --> 00:02:11,320
I'll take you for a Jersey girl.
18
00:02:11,540 --> 00:02:12,540
A Jersey girl?
19
00:02:12,920 --> 00:02:17,060
Listen, I love Jerseys, yeah, but I'm a
Harlem girl. Born and motherfuckin'
20
00:02:17,060 --> 00:02:18,900
raised. Real niggas on me, yeah.
21
00:02:19,260 --> 00:02:20,720
Oh, so you're black.
22
00:02:22,820 --> 00:02:23,820
No, motherfucker!
23
00:02:27,660 --> 00:02:28,660
No cat.
24
00:02:28,760 --> 00:02:29,760
The cat.
25
00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:31,240
Fuck all y 'all.
26
00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:34,560
Bitch, spit them pearls back out.
27
00:02:35,800 --> 00:02:36,880
I want your shit.
28
00:02:38,980 --> 00:02:41,820
Hello? So tell me, what's your favorite
scary movie?
29
00:02:43,380 --> 00:02:46,480
I don't really do them. You know, all
the stupid tropes and shit. Why is it
30
00:02:46,480 --> 00:02:49,520
always the white bitch at the end?
Because they know it's too hard to kill
31
00:02:49,520 --> 00:02:52,440
sister. You know what I'm saying?
Because if the sister can survive
32
00:02:52,440 --> 00:02:54,100
cheese, we can survive anything.
33
00:02:55,380 --> 00:02:56,680
You know, it might help you.
34
00:02:58,130 --> 00:03:00,190
Met you outside. Boy, you is needy.
35
00:03:01,010 --> 00:03:02,770
What's your sign? Must be a Scorpio.
36
00:03:02,990 --> 00:03:03,990
How'd you know?
37
00:03:04,030 --> 00:03:06,090
Good dick, though. But toxic as hell.
38
00:03:06,350 --> 00:03:09,970
Hey, is the restaurant here an alley?
Yes, hurry, before they rob your ass.
39
00:03:10,810 --> 00:03:13,370
Frozen? Nah, not today. Cheap bitch.
40
00:03:13,630 --> 00:03:14,489
Heard you all.
41
00:03:14,490 --> 00:03:16,330
Okay, I'm coming down the alley now.
42
00:03:17,010 --> 00:03:18,870
I'm here. Can you see me? I'm waving.
43
00:03:19,730 --> 00:03:20,730
No.
44
00:03:21,350 --> 00:03:23,070
The person I'm looking at's not waving.
45
00:03:23,830 --> 00:03:26,890
In fact, they're just staring at me.
Well, stare at his ass back.
46
00:03:27,950 --> 00:03:30,910
And don't blink. Never blink. You've got
such felicity to learn. What?
47
00:03:31,110 --> 00:03:32,830
No, they're walking towards me now.
48
00:03:33,570 --> 00:03:35,070
Oh, no, they have a knife.
49
00:03:35,390 --> 00:03:36,690
Why don't I leave his ass over here?
50
00:03:37,190 --> 00:03:38,570
I thought that was the worst part.
51
00:03:39,230 --> 00:03:45,550
The worst part is, you know so much
about horror movies, and yet you still
52
00:03:45,550 --> 00:03:47,030
into the army alone.
53
00:03:48,390 --> 00:03:51,950
Yeah, but the worst part is, you're
fucking with a New York bitch.
54
00:04:10,480 --> 00:04:11,640
Get on to the mentorship.
55
00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:28,540
Seriously, Len? I didn't recognize your
bird call. I thought you was going to
56
00:04:28,540 --> 00:04:29,540
war with us.
57
00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:30,820
That's a pigeon, nigga.
58
00:04:31,100 --> 00:04:34,600
It's supposed to be... A hawk's going to
attack.
59
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:37,240
My bad.
60
00:04:37,300 --> 00:04:38,300
Are you done?
61
00:04:43,740 --> 00:04:46,320
Bitch, I'm Tiana Taylor. My ass got ass.
62
00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:53,900
Come on, girl. We want this out.
63
00:04:58,140 --> 00:04:59,560
Somebody help me.
64
00:05:01,180 --> 00:05:02,340
No, no, no, no.
65
00:05:04,320 --> 00:05:05,320
Now,
66
00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:11,380
get your whole head in that zone.
67
00:05:14,300 --> 00:05:19,500
Hey, Tiana, you might have kicked my
ass, but you still didn't win that
68
00:05:20,180 --> 00:05:21,780
What'd you say about my Oscar?
69
00:05:22,220 --> 00:05:23,440
Did I stutter?
70
00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:24,720
You lost.
71
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:26,200
You're right.
72
00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:28,320
But I won that Golden Globe, bitch.
73
00:05:29,220 --> 00:05:30,660
Oh my God, really?
74
00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:32,840
See, that's why I never watched horror
movies.
75
00:05:33,080 --> 00:05:34,080
It's fucking terrible.
76
00:05:34,260 --> 00:05:37,140
Just a bunch of celebrity cameos and
fart gags.
77
00:05:38,120 --> 00:05:39,820
So, you don't like parodies?
78
00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:41,400
I'm more into Judd Apatow films.
79
00:05:41,700 --> 00:05:42,700
You know.
80
00:05:42,780 --> 00:05:43,780
Elevated comedy.
81
00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:46,760
And what is elevated comedy?
82
00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:51,040
The kind that doesn't actually make
anyone laugh, but makes white people
83
00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:52,040
smart.
84
00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,000
Tuesday, don't answer that.
85
00:05:55,300 --> 00:05:56,420
It'd be post -safe.
86
00:05:56,780 --> 00:05:58,360
Oh, come on, Elle.
87
00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:00,520
Stuff like that only happens in the
movies.
88
00:06:03,220 --> 00:06:04,500
Oh, hey.
89
00:06:04,720 --> 00:06:06,960
I wasn't expecting you to answer the
door.
90
00:06:07,280 --> 00:06:08,280
What the fuck?
91
00:06:08,480 --> 00:06:10,180
Now, here's my knife.
92
00:06:10,440 --> 00:06:11,440
Not this.
93
00:06:12,620 --> 00:06:14,420
Hello, Tuesday.
94
00:06:45,070 --> 00:06:46,430
Just Ritalin for my ADHD.
95
00:06:47,190 --> 00:06:48,450
Adderall for PTSD.
96
00:06:48,730 --> 00:06:50,390
A couple Xanax for my anxiety.
97
00:06:50,830 --> 00:06:51,910
And your voter pills.
98
00:06:52,870 --> 00:06:54,430
So good luck getting it up now.
99
00:06:56,810 --> 00:07:01,030
Jesus, Sarah, how many did you take? I
don't know. How many come in a bottle?
100
00:07:02,930 --> 00:07:03,930
Hey, Jeff.
101
00:07:04,110 --> 00:07:08,410
Sarah, Tuesday's in the hospital. She
was stabbed by a killer. You know,
102
00:07:08,490 --> 00:07:10,890
Ghostface. Wait, from Wu -Tang?
103
00:07:11,340 --> 00:07:15,420
Why would Ghostface Killer, aka Pretty
Tony, aka Starkey Love, want to stab my
104
00:07:15,420 --> 00:07:18,080
sister? God, Sarah, it wasn't Ghostface
Killer.
105
00:07:18,300 --> 00:07:19,820
It was somebody in a Ghostface mask.
106
00:07:20,280 --> 00:07:22,820
Ah, okay, that makes more sense.
107
00:07:44,490 --> 00:07:45,610
I can't make up for the past.
108
00:07:46,170 --> 00:07:47,170
Well, hey, hey, hey.
109
00:07:47,910 --> 00:07:48,910
I'm going with you.
110
00:07:49,390 --> 00:07:53,010
Not because I'm the obvious killer
trying to lure you back here from town.
111
00:07:53,010 --> 00:07:54,070
just a supportive boyfriend.
112
00:07:54,510 --> 00:07:55,590
Yeah. That's all.
113
00:07:57,050 --> 00:07:58,890
Okay, let's go. Get in the car.
114
00:07:59,750 --> 00:08:01,890
Listen, we just have to make one stop on
the way.
115
00:08:02,830 --> 00:08:03,830
I survived.
116
00:08:04,890 --> 00:08:06,730
All thanks to my lucky penny.
117
00:08:43,579 --> 00:08:45,920
I'm a cool mom. Everybody wish they had.
118
00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:46,839
I'm lit.
119
00:08:46,840 --> 00:08:50,220
Don't forget, I got practice later, so
I'll be home late. You only made the
120
00:08:50,220 --> 00:08:53,160
because you're black, and those racist
fucks assumed you could play.
121
00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:56,840
It's 2026. I don't think race is an
issue.
122
00:08:57,260 --> 00:08:58,300
Do you read black Twitter?
123
00:08:58,920 --> 00:09:02,800
No. Oh, Ray, are you still dating that
hoe?
124
00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:07,700
Okay, stop hoe -shaming her, Tessa. Just
because Daryl and them ran a train on
125
00:09:07,700 --> 00:09:10,140
her doesn't make her a hoe. She's not a
hoe.
126
00:09:10,560 --> 00:09:11,680
She's sex positive.
127
00:09:12,030 --> 00:09:13,750
Well, I'm positive she's a ho.
128
00:09:14,870 --> 00:09:16,510
Hey, girl! Look at you!
129
00:09:16,890 --> 00:09:18,250
Early for Halloween, huh?
130
00:09:18,450 --> 00:09:20,090
What you do this year? Bloody
schoolgirl!
131
00:09:20,470 --> 00:09:21,329
Happy, huh?
132
00:09:21,330 --> 00:09:22,330
I miss me.
133
00:09:23,310 --> 00:09:24,350
Love the hair.
134
00:09:24,770 --> 00:09:26,510
I mean, I'll take it center.
135
00:09:26,850 --> 00:09:30,170
Well, thank you very much. I gotta
invite you over and make you a little
136
00:09:30,170 --> 00:09:35,150
pie. Ooh, you know what? I gotta get to
African American history class. We're
137
00:09:35,150 --> 00:09:36,150
learning about slavery.
138
00:09:36,370 --> 00:09:39,310
Come to find out. It was a choice. You
see that right there?
139
00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:41,630
That's Kanye. That's right.
140
00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:44,080
They've been teaching us wrong all this
time.
141
00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:45,380
Mm -hmm. Stay black.
142
00:09:46,400 --> 00:09:47,179
Bye, Mom.
143
00:09:47,180 --> 00:09:49,880
All right. Bye, baby. Bye, baby. Bye.
144
00:09:50,080 --> 00:09:53,940
Son, I put some condoms in your bag. You
know how they try to trap y 'all.
145
00:09:54,340 --> 00:09:55,340
Okay,
146
00:09:57,540 --> 00:10:00,800
seriously? Sheriff Greg, you don't have
to walk me to class. I'm fine.
147
00:10:01,000 --> 00:10:03,260
Jess, there's a serial killer on the
loose.
148
00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:06,160
I'm not going to let anything happen to
my baby girl.
149
00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:08,980
Boy, okay? I'm a baby boy. I'm sorry.
150
00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:11,660
I'm having a hard time with this
transition.
151
00:10:11,940 --> 00:10:12,940
Okay, it's really simple.
152
00:10:13,100 --> 00:10:14,880
Treat me like one of the guys.
153
00:10:15,140 --> 00:10:16,140
Okay?
154
00:10:16,440 --> 00:10:18,440
I can do that? Yeah.
155
00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:20,239
Slap fight.
156
00:10:20,240 --> 00:10:22,240
Oh, you call that a slap?
157
00:10:23,080 --> 00:10:26,380
Who the hell did you do that for?
158
00:10:26,840 --> 00:10:28,220
I look like such a bitch.
159
00:10:29,380 --> 00:10:30,380
Bitch.
160
00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:00,600
You look like shit.
161
00:11:01,340 --> 00:11:03,940
Hey, please. This is clearly a woman
who's run out of condition.
162
00:11:04,220 --> 00:11:07,300
Oh, be careful where you walk. The whole
place is a booby trap.
163
00:11:07,700 --> 00:11:09,900
You never know when that psycho's gonna
come back.
164
00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:11,280
Come in.
165
00:11:12,180 --> 00:11:13,180
Okay.
166
00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:23,900
I hate
167
00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:24,900
this job.
168
00:11:27,580 --> 00:11:28,580
Mr. Campbell.
169
00:11:30,350 --> 00:11:31,630
I'm Jack, Sarah's boyfriend.
170
00:11:32,710 --> 00:11:34,190
I've heard so much about you.
171
00:11:34,590 --> 00:11:35,590
None of it good.
172
00:11:36,310 --> 00:11:41,630
I have heard nothing about you, Jack. I
assume you're a piece of shit. But how
173
00:11:41,630 --> 00:11:45,970
would I know when I haven't heard from
my daughter in, what, six months?
174
00:11:46,290 --> 00:11:51,330
Six years, Mother. And whose fault is
that? And whose fault is that? I don't
175
00:11:51,330 --> 00:11:52,330
know. Maybe it's yours.
176
00:11:53,490 --> 00:11:54,490
That's fair.
177
00:11:54,710 --> 00:11:57,630
We want to learn from the horror you
survived.
178
00:11:58,090 --> 00:11:59,090
Look.
179
00:11:59,100 --> 00:12:03,640
Scary movie three and four paid me a lot
of money for a girl. There is nothing
180
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:04,640
to learn there.
181
00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:07,440
But if you want to talk about the house,
buddy, shoot.
182
00:12:07,680 --> 00:12:08,700
It's happening again.
183
00:12:09,080 --> 00:12:13,000
Some asshole in a mask. We have to stop
him.
184
00:12:13,540 --> 00:12:15,040
You're not ready, love bug.
185
00:12:15,800 --> 00:12:18,240
I have been preparing for this for
years.
186
00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:20,280
Sacrificed everything.
187
00:12:20,660 --> 00:12:21,860
You are a terrible mother.
188
00:12:22,200 --> 00:12:23,280
Come on, honey.
189
00:12:23,500 --> 00:12:25,160
We have some good times.
190
00:12:26,090 --> 00:12:29,390
Like that Christmas I took you to meet
Santa at the mall?
191
00:12:33,390 --> 00:12:38,590
Your turn, Sarah.
192
00:12:39,530 --> 00:12:42,030
Move. Hi, Santa.
193
00:12:42,710 --> 00:12:45,990
Sorry if I don't sit in your lap.
194
00:12:46,210 --> 00:12:47,690
You creep me out.
195
00:13:20,650 --> 00:13:21,650
Santa doesn't exist.
196
00:13:22,270 --> 00:13:27,170
Mother, I need your help. To heal our
emotional wounds and put the past behind
197
00:13:27,170 --> 00:13:29,310
us? Oh, God, no.
198
00:13:29,810 --> 00:13:31,590
No, to kill Ghostface.
199
00:13:32,150 --> 00:13:33,350
Do you have any guns?
200
00:13:34,870 --> 00:13:37,430
I am Cindy fucking Campbell.
201
00:13:37,750 --> 00:13:43,530
I've got millions of guns, but none of
them are registered due to my mental
202
00:13:43,530 --> 00:13:44,530
health issues.
203
00:13:44,770 --> 00:13:47,430
So if you could just keep that all
below.
204
00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:04,260
Okay, so I spoke to Sarah earlier.
205
00:14:04,540 --> 00:14:06,260
Oh, is she coming? You know what I did?
206
00:14:06,460 --> 00:14:07,460
Hear a buzzing sound.
207
00:14:07,740 --> 00:14:10,220
So it's possible. No, I meant to
Woodsville.
208
00:14:10,500 --> 00:14:12,160
Dumbass. Oh, I forgot that.
209
00:14:12,380 --> 00:14:13,259
Hey, Jimbo!
210
00:14:13,260 --> 00:14:14,260
Go deep!
211
00:14:15,260 --> 00:14:16,260
Oh!
212
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:18,000
Sweet!
213
00:14:19,020 --> 00:14:22,180
Speaking of going deep... Uh, I don't
know if it's a good time.
214
00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:25,360
Everyone knows what happens to teenagers
who try to make love when there's a
215
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:26,199
killer on the loose.
216
00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:27,420
Brad's right about one thing, guys.
217
00:14:27,620 --> 00:14:28,680
Okay, Ghostface is back.
218
00:14:28,940 --> 00:14:29,940
We need to arm up.
219
00:14:30,360 --> 00:14:31,239
Pepper spray?
220
00:14:31,240 --> 00:14:32,240
Check.
221
00:14:33,260 --> 00:14:34,460
Taser. Check.
222
00:14:35,000 --> 00:14:36,000
Butt plug?
223
00:14:36,260 --> 00:14:37,260
Double plug.
224
00:14:37,940 --> 00:14:40,760
Goddamn! You just carry that thing
around?
225
00:14:41,120 --> 00:14:42,120
It's easy to hide.
226
00:14:45,280 --> 00:14:46,400
In your butt?
227
00:14:48,300 --> 00:14:49,300
I'm impressed.
228
00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:12,680
I'm tired of you little Gen Z alpha
niggas using terms like unk and auntie,
229
00:15:12,700 --> 00:15:17,340
gaslighting, blazing and glamping,
trying to make my generation sound old.
230
00:15:17,340 --> 00:15:18,500
ain't your damn unk, nigga.
231
00:15:18,700 --> 00:15:22,580
Shorty, you're a mother's brother, so
yeah, technically you are our uncle.
232
00:15:22,900 --> 00:15:24,460
Oh, my bad.
233
00:15:25,380 --> 00:15:27,900
It's crazy that they let you teach here.
234
00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:30,140
Teach? Nah, nigga.
235
00:15:30,560 --> 00:15:31,560
I attend.
236
00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:34,660
You're looking at a proud 25th year
senior.
237
00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:37,020
When are you finally going to graduate?
238
00:15:37,340 --> 00:15:40,300
By the time we do a sequel and I gotta
follow you little young niggas to
239
00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:42,580
to get my check. Wait, guys, Tuesday's
awake.
240
00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:44,780
All right, Tuesday. Who the fuck is
Tuesday?
241
00:15:45,440 --> 00:15:47,560
Hey, we gotta go to the hospital. You
gonna take the bus home?
242
00:15:47,760 --> 00:15:48,900
Nah, the PJ.
243
00:15:49,580 --> 00:15:50,580
Private Jed?
244
00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:51,720
Yeah, jealous.
245
00:15:52,060 --> 00:15:55,720
Man, you smoke weed all day. Just play
video games, live stream.
246
00:15:56,020 --> 00:15:57,540
You literally got money doing nothing.
247
00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:00,740
Exactly. I leave the hard work for the
old head.
248
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:02,640
Jesus!
249
00:16:03,560 --> 00:16:04,640
Still the same short.
250
00:16:06,410 --> 00:16:09,670
Check my crypto. Oh shit, I'm up three
million dollars.
251
00:16:11,250 --> 00:16:13,350
Damn, now I'm down five million.
252
00:16:13,670 --> 00:16:15,410
This shit, we're crazy, son.
253
00:16:52,010 --> 00:16:53,490
Sister Brenda, it's okay.
254
00:16:53,890 --> 00:16:56,130
You heard the call of sin. Yes, you did.
255
00:16:56,330 --> 00:16:59,990
But the Lord has called on us to show
men such like you the way.
256
00:17:00,450 --> 00:17:01,450
Come on, son.
257
00:17:01,770 --> 00:17:02,770
Come with us.
258
00:17:03,590 --> 00:17:04,590
Come on us.
259
00:17:04,990 --> 00:17:10,770
God see you coming. So don't cheat that
come on. We need you to come like you
260
00:17:10,770 --> 00:17:11,770
never came before.
261
00:17:11,990 --> 00:17:13,990
Come for the father, come for the son.
262
00:17:14,310 --> 00:17:16,410
I'm going to hold your hand and we're
going to come together.
263
00:17:29,770 --> 00:17:31,210
Oh, my bad.
264
00:17:32,090 --> 00:17:33,130
Last time.
265
00:17:35,690 --> 00:17:39,450
Let's welcome a new member to our
congregation.
266
00:17:41,850 --> 00:17:48,850
I'm not
267
00:17:48,850 --> 00:17:50,170
gay no more.
268
00:18:10,639 --> 00:18:11,720
I'll go along with it.
269
00:18:53,550 --> 00:18:55,230
Thank you.
270
00:20:42,830 --> 00:20:44,210
Who's that Jeffrey Dahmer lookalike?
271
00:20:45,290 --> 00:20:47,190
This is my boyfriend, Jack.
272
00:20:47,550 --> 00:20:48,670
Really nice to meet you.
273
00:20:49,590 --> 00:20:51,210
Look like Ted Bundy to me.
274
00:20:51,730 --> 00:20:53,410
But that ain't none of my business.
275
00:20:55,890 --> 00:20:58,030
This old stabbed up bitch here needs
some rest.
276
00:20:58,270 --> 00:21:00,010
So y 'all, get the fuck out!
277
00:21:00,230 --> 00:21:01,230
Yes, ma 'am.
278
00:21:02,890 --> 00:21:05,610
Oh, not you, Sarah. Why? What did I do?
279
00:21:07,090 --> 00:21:08,130
I'm so scared.
280
00:21:09,710 --> 00:21:12,130
Oh, twos. You should be.
281
00:21:12,850 --> 00:21:15,230
You've been stabbed nine times.
282
00:21:15,690 --> 00:21:17,410
And the killer knows where you live.
283
00:21:17,750 --> 00:21:21,790
I would invite you to come stay at my
place, but I don't really want that kind
284
00:21:21,790 --> 00:21:22,870
of juju in my house.
285
00:21:23,430 --> 00:21:26,230
For all we know, he's standing right
outside that door.
286
00:21:32,690 --> 00:21:33,690
Comforting, Sarah.
287
00:21:34,210 --> 00:21:35,610
I thought I was going to die.
288
00:21:35,830 --> 00:21:36,890
I know, me too.
289
00:21:37,630 --> 00:21:39,030
I planned a funeral.
290
00:21:40,150 --> 00:21:44,840
What the hell? And I wrote your own...
obituary more like chatty t wrote it but
291
00:21:44,840 --> 00:21:48,360
you're still here and i will never let
anyone hurt you
292
00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:36,420
this shit, baby. That's my show. Frogs
and that Idris Alba make this Gucci
293
00:22:36,420 --> 00:22:37,420
pop, pop, pop.
294
00:22:37,580 --> 00:22:41,640
Dear Lord, please accept this white
bitch in.
295
00:22:42,140 --> 00:22:45,560
Oh! The Lord works in mysterious ways.
296
00:22:46,460 --> 00:22:47,580
I'm going on break.
297
00:24:47,850 --> 00:24:50,210
It's metal. I told you. I fell.
298
00:24:50,510 --> 00:24:52,370
Now where exactly are we going?
299
00:24:52,870 --> 00:24:53,910
Let's do an experiment.
300
00:25:06,510 --> 00:25:07,510
Go away!
301
00:25:07,550 --> 00:25:10,870
I'm so sorry to bother you. We just want
to ask you a few questions.
302
00:25:11,410 --> 00:25:13,830
Give me one good reason why I should
talk to you.
303
00:25:14,330 --> 00:25:15,330
I'm white.
304
00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:18,320
Oh, I'm talking Candace Owens' wife.
305
00:25:19,500 --> 00:25:20,640
Oh. That's it.
306
00:25:20,980 --> 00:25:24,180
When you said expert, I assumed you
meant more like the old grad type than
307
00:25:24,180 --> 00:25:26,140
class. I'm Sarah Campbell.
308
00:25:26,460 --> 00:25:28,540
I was attacked last night. I think you
should leave.
309
00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:31,460
I don't want to get stabbed, and I don't
want COVID, okay?
310
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:34,980
Please, come on. Just two minutes.
That's all I'm asking. No, no.
311
00:25:35,500 --> 00:25:36,700
I'll give you eight minutes.
312
00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:39,000
And another thing.
313
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:41,880
Oh, I can taste it. Go.
314
00:25:42,540 --> 00:25:44,680
Oh, my gosh. Oh, oh, oh, oh.
315
00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:47,800
No, you guys are good.
316
00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:51,620
When did the work week become the woke
week? We've got Black Friday. What's
317
00:25:51,620 --> 00:25:52,620
next? Mulatto Monday?
318
00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:54,260
I mean, Yellow Thursday?
319
00:25:55,260 --> 00:25:56,780
Come on.
320
00:25:59,080 --> 00:26:00,960
Let me get this out of the way.
321
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:02,400
Oh. Sorry.
322
00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:05,100
Oh, this is done.
323
00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:07,820
Yep, you're good.
324
00:26:09,820 --> 00:26:12,020
You're Cindy's daughter, right? Yeah.
325
00:26:12,420 --> 00:26:13,820
Yeah. I don't know him.
326
00:26:14,060 --> 00:26:16,140
Oh, this is Jack, my love interest.
327
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:18,020
No, no, no, no.
328
00:26:18,220 --> 00:26:23,420
Rule number one of surviving a horror
movie is never trust the love interest.
329
00:26:23,740 --> 00:26:24,740
Look at him.
330
00:26:25,160 --> 00:26:31,120
He's got that weird lazy eye poking one
leg and he's drooling like a psychopath.
331
00:26:31,640 --> 00:26:33,140
He's got that stumped leg.
332
00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:35,880
Makes the ball walk weird and creepy.
333
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:37,540
I don't have a stump.
334
00:26:37,780 --> 00:26:38,780
I got done.
335
00:26:39,360 --> 00:26:41,440
Oh. Don't look at me.
336
00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:44,140
Just off your duty.
337
00:26:45,060 --> 00:26:46,060
Retired.
338
00:26:46,419 --> 00:26:48,700
Listen, Doofy, we could really use your
help.
339
00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:51,700
Yeah. I can't go back to that life.
340
00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:55,940
Plus, we're in the middle of a global
pandemic. Okay, I hate to break it to
341
00:26:55,960 --> 00:26:58,200
but COVID has been over for, like,
years.
342
00:26:59,260 --> 00:27:00,260
Really?
343
00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:01,720
Yeah.
344
00:27:04,440 --> 00:27:05,440
Damn it!
345
00:27:06,180 --> 00:27:08,080
What am I going to do with all this
candy?
346
00:27:10,620 --> 00:27:14,580
Get out. I don't want ghost shit to find
me. And don't come back.
347
00:27:36,260 --> 00:27:37,260
Okay,
348
00:27:39,520 --> 00:27:43,240
just because he showered doesn't mean
that... Yeah, I didn't shower. I just
349
00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:44,700
water from my mouth.
350
00:27:45,100 --> 00:27:46,100
You want some?
351
00:27:46,180 --> 00:27:47,180
No, that's okay.
352
00:27:47,360 --> 00:27:48,360
I did. Come on, juicy.
353
00:27:48,560 --> 00:27:49,760
Yeah, do it.
354
00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:53,460
Sarah, is your Vietnam mom coming? Or
can we start talking about this plot?
355
00:27:54,040 --> 00:27:57,700
Uh... Hi.
356
00:27:58,880 --> 00:27:59,880
You came.
357
00:27:59,960 --> 00:28:03,740
Not in like 15 years, honey. But I did
buy this.
358
00:28:04,200 --> 00:28:06,100
New rose, so fingers crossed.
359
00:28:35,720 --> 00:28:38,880
from the weed, smoke, your love of the
McRib and racist cops?
360
00:28:39,200 --> 00:28:40,860
I didn't think you had a chance.
361
00:28:41,180 --> 00:28:42,220
Yeah, that's a terrible comment.
362
00:28:43,500 --> 00:28:44,500
Hi, Sam.
363
00:28:44,740 --> 00:28:46,180
Stop smiling at me!
364
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:49,600
Shit!
365
00:28:49,840 --> 00:28:50,840
Wildstar!
366
00:28:51,100 --> 00:28:56,460
Wildstar! Wildstar! Hey, he's
intellectually disabled. That's just how
367
00:28:56,540 --> 00:29:00,620
you drunk honky. Hey, hey, hey. Don't
call that white bitch a honky. Come on,
368
00:29:00,700 --> 00:29:01,700
have some respect.
369
00:29:06,510 --> 00:29:08,010
It must be some kind of curse.
370
00:29:08,210 --> 00:29:09,210
Hey, everybody.
371
00:29:09,830 --> 00:29:10,830
Look what I got.
372
00:29:11,270 --> 00:29:16,130
Non -branded gelatin shop made with
brain alcohol and GHB. So ain't nobody
373
00:29:16,130 --> 00:29:19,250
sipping that name consent to life long
time, which I apologize.
374
00:29:19,490 --> 00:29:21,070
Take one. I love being myself.
375
00:29:22,230 --> 00:29:23,510
No. You sure, baby?
376
00:30:06,100 --> 00:30:07,100
You know,
377
00:30:21,120 --> 00:30:25,580
Ma, this place could be so cool if you
had like a a beer pong table over there,
378
00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:26,660
maybe like a snack wall.
379
00:30:26,940 --> 00:30:29,920
What you know about cool? When I was
your age, I was popping bottles with
380
00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:33,440
Puff Daddy, P. Diddy, Diddy, all the
Shons.
381
00:30:34,520 --> 00:30:37,520
That ain't as well. Your mama was the
freak in the free course.
382
00:30:38,380 --> 00:30:40,540
You want to see something cool?
383
00:30:41,020 --> 00:30:42,140
I'm going to show you something cool.
384
00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:42,880
Ted Bundy eyes, looking like a school
shooter. I think you the killer. Oh, me?
385
00:31:43,060 --> 00:31:45,280
Okay, what about Deputy Doofy over
there?
386
00:31:45,500 --> 00:31:46,540
I don't have a motive.
387
00:31:46,780 --> 00:31:47,780
You know, what's my motive?
388
00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:49,800
You were the killer in the first movie.
389
00:31:50,480 --> 00:31:55,080
Shouldn't you be locked up? No, I got
pardoned. Mostly because of the storming
390
00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:57,380
the Capitol, you know. I got proof.
391
00:31:57,880 --> 00:31:58,880
It's me.
392
00:31:59,180 --> 00:32:00,180
I'm trained.
393
00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:01,240
That's a cool hit.
394
00:32:01,360 --> 00:32:03,340
What about Jeff?
395
00:32:04,100 --> 00:32:05,100
What about me?
396
00:32:05,150 --> 00:32:09,190
If anybody here has issues that could
lead to murder, leave me in the
397
00:32:09,550 --> 00:32:11,210
Transpaming is not cool, okay?
398
00:32:11,610 --> 00:32:12,770
He's just a dude.
399
00:32:13,210 --> 00:32:16,130
Minus the for body strength and the dick
part.
400
00:32:16,410 --> 00:32:18,310
Hey, you don't know what I got down
here, okay?
401
00:32:18,570 --> 00:32:19,529
I do.
402
00:32:19,530 --> 00:32:24,950
Hey, hey. Listen, what we know so far is
everyone who's been attacked is related
403
00:32:24,950 --> 00:32:26,410
to the original characters.
404
00:32:26,710 --> 00:32:27,770
They wanted to kill the kid.
405
00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:35,820
A what now? Yep, it's like a reboot and
a sequel mixed with legacy characters
406
00:32:35,820 --> 00:32:40,280
with new characters and an attempt to
feed into bullshit nostalgia and bring
407
00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:43,340
more fans to the theater. Just like last
year's I Know What You Did Last Summer.
408
00:32:45,640 --> 00:32:46,599
That's a movie?
409
00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:49,760
What did I do last summer? I think
you're talking about the summer I turned
410
00:32:49,760 --> 00:32:50,719
pretty. Yeah.
411
00:32:50,720 --> 00:32:52,380
Ray, when did you get here?
412
00:32:52,700 --> 00:32:54,300
I walked in here. I was just hanging out
by the minimum.
413
00:32:58,890 --> 00:33:01,870
our killer is writing his own version of
horror movie.
414
00:33:02,150 --> 00:33:06,650
Okay, so according to the rebooty call
rules, who's the killer?
415
00:33:07,270 --> 00:33:09,550
I think it's pretty obvious.
416
00:33:12,770 --> 00:33:13,770
Who?
417
00:33:14,310 --> 00:33:15,310
You, bitch.
418
00:33:15,430 --> 00:33:18,070
Me? Guys, I am not the killer.
419
00:33:18,370 --> 00:33:23,270
Ghostface attacked Tuesday to lure me
back here. I think he attacked Tuesday
420
00:33:23,270 --> 00:33:24,310
get you back here.
421
00:33:24,550 --> 00:33:26,670
So he could get me back here.
422
00:33:27,210 --> 00:33:30,230
He wants to kill the OGs. That was a
flex.
423
00:33:30,690 --> 00:33:31,690
Yeah, that sounds better.
424
00:33:31,870 --> 00:33:33,190
Fuck this!
425
00:33:33,570 --> 00:33:35,470
And fuck you, mother!
426
00:33:36,070 --> 00:33:37,750
To your mother?
427
00:34:10,480 --> 00:34:11,480
Agent Underwood?
428
00:34:11,820 --> 00:34:13,199
I'll give you one hint.
429
00:34:13,820 --> 00:34:15,639
What's your favorite scary movie?
430
00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:18,100
Well, I'm going to go with Saltburn.
431
00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:20,920
I mean, the member on that English guy
was terrifying.
432
00:34:21,360 --> 00:34:25,500
And Ken Jeong's junk in The Hangover was
a much better depiction of the male
433
00:34:25,500 --> 00:34:28,040
anatomy. Now, what do you want,
fuckface?
434
00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:32,219
Well, I'm just calling to tell you that
by the time you get home, I'll have
435
00:34:32,219 --> 00:34:33,420
gutted your baby girl.
436
00:34:34,320 --> 00:34:35,480
Hey, asshole.
437
00:34:35,920 --> 00:34:36,920
Be the boy.
438
00:35:04,330 --> 00:35:05,330
for this?
439
00:35:05,850 --> 00:35:07,430
Let me help you.
440
00:35:08,030 --> 00:35:10,370
I got your baby dick.
441
00:35:10,910 --> 00:35:12,490
Winky, winky, winky, winky.
442
00:35:22,050 --> 00:35:23,830
Alright, here we go.
443
00:35:24,290 --> 00:35:25,810
What do you want, fuckface?
444
00:35:26,250 --> 00:35:29,290
Like father, like son.
445
00:35:30,170 --> 00:35:32,450
I understand you're home alone.
446
00:35:33,390 --> 00:35:38,510
Dad's out, but the pool guy, the
gardener, and the plumber are all here,
447
00:35:38,590 --> 00:35:40,770
asshole. Look out your window.
448
00:35:45,750 --> 00:35:48,730
No, but they're the backbone of the
American workforce.
449
00:35:49,850 --> 00:35:51,510
And I'm too white to do those jobs.
450
00:35:51,970 --> 00:35:53,130
But cut to the chase.
451
00:35:53,530 --> 00:35:55,310
I'll ask you one question.
452
00:35:55,650 --> 00:35:58,270
If you answer correctly, you live.
453
00:35:58,710 --> 00:36:02,290
Who was the killer in Horror Movie?
454
00:36:02,880 --> 00:36:07,720
Oh, that was easy. It was Bobby and then
K. Ray, the guy who was totally into
455
00:36:07,720 --> 00:36:10,900
dudes, even though he claimed he wasn't.
Classic 2000s homophobia.
456
00:36:11,200 --> 00:36:13,040
But I got you, bitch. Wrong.
457
00:36:13,300 --> 00:36:17,140
You forgot Special Officer Doofy. Now
you die.
458
00:36:25,740 --> 00:36:26,840
Oh, fuck that!
459
00:36:28,660 --> 00:36:31,080
You should probably answer that.
460
00:36:31,400 --> 00:36:34,250
I can... I can literally see you trying
to steal my package.
461
00:36:35,430 --> 00:36:36,570
Ow, shit.
462
00:36:36,890 --> 00:36:38,930
That was easy.
463
00:36:41,850 --> 00:36:44,990
Uh, someone over at Steak's. Let's go,
Puff.
464
00:36:47,890 --> 00:36:48,890
What do you think?
465
00:36:48,950 --> 00:36:52,110
Careful. You wouldn't want to let any
killer do this.
466
00:36:52,370 --> 00:36:55,850
You are about to identify as dead.
467
00:37:02,700 --> 00:37:03,700
A girl.
468
00:37:10,360 --> 00:37:16,880
Come on, girl! It's that Ghostface show
for you! This is Kiki West for
469
00:37:16,880 --> 00:37:20,900
OnlyFans Rapid News. Rapid News? You
mean BAPid News! You don't even have a
470
00:37:20,900 --> 00:37:22,620
cameraman! My equipment!
471
00:37:24,400 --> 00:37:25,400
Excuse me.
472
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:28,320
Oh, my.
473
00:37:28,420 --> 00:37:29,740
You're... Yes, yes.
474
00:37:30,110 --> 00:37:34,130
three -time Emmy nominee for outstanding
achievement in sensational reporting.
475
00:37:34,370 --> 00:37:38,550
I was going to say the lady from
Friends, but shorter than the glass of
476
00:37:38,610 --> 00:37:40,510
Is that what you were going to say?
477
00:37:40,730 --> 00:37:44,490
You seriously don't know who I am? Baby
girl, I am Doofus.
478
00:37:45,390 --> 00:37:48,910
Hail Storm. Get the hell out of my way!
479
00:37:54,190 --> 00:37:55,190
Doofus?
480
00:37:58,730 --> 00:37:59,750
You haven't aged a day.
481
00:38:00,310 --> 00:38:03,030
You've aged like a million days. That's
just what I'm implying. Yeah, your
482
00:38:03,030 --> 00:38:04,030
fingers felt like genitals.
483
00:38:04,270 --> 00:38:06,250
What are you doing in that ridiculous
uniform?
484
00:38:07,210 --> 00:38:08,410
I'm back on the case.
485
00:38:08,730 --> 00:38:10,050
Yeah, I'm going to bust Ghostface.
486
00:38:10,570 --> 00:38:17,410
Well, um, tell me, Special Needs Officer
Doofy, um, are there any suspects
487
00:38:17,410 --> 00:38:20,530
in this tragic yet completely
predictable incident?
488
00:38:20,770 --> 00:38:22,070
I could not let you say.
489
00:38:22,410 --> 00:38:23,950
No, no, no, no.
490
00:38:24,250 --> 00:38:25,950
Yes, you can. I did not. Yeah.
491
00:38:26,690 --> 00:38:27,690
So mean.
492
00:38:31,220 --> 00:38:35,340
Hey, remember when you used to give
blowjobs for sensitive information?
493
00:38:35,940 --> 00:38:39,400
I don't give blowjobs anymore, okay?
Nothing's me too.
494
00:38:39,680 --> 00:38:40,680
Okay, sorry.
495
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:45,040
I give handjobs now, but the story
better be good. Okay, I'll do a handjob.
496
00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:46,240
Let's do it. Let's do it.
497
00:39:17,260 --> 00:39:18,540
Maybe weed shouldn't be legal.
498
00:39:21,720 --> 00:39:22,920
Fuck yeah, it should.
499
00:39:27,680 --> 00:39:28,680
Hello,
500
00:39:34,740 --> 00:39:39,080
shorty. You didn't know that smoking is
bad for you?
501
00:39:39,340 --> 00:39:45,800
Well, actually, weed ain't bad for you.
You got vitamin T, C, and H, C, B, and
502
00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:46,800
D.
503
00:39:47,080 --> 00:39:48,240
What's the matter, Shorty?
504
00:39:48,540 --> 00:39:50,980
You look a little antsy.
505
00:39:51,340 --> 00:39:56,540
Maybe because there's a masked serial
killer sipping tea in my den.
506
00:39:56,940 --> 00:39:59,560
Shorty, you're my nigga. I mean, friend.
507
00:39:59,880 --> 00:40:01,780
Please. All right.
508
00:40:05,620 --> 00:40:07,380
Do you want to quit smoking?
509
00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:09,840
Well, to be honest, I tried to quit.
510
00:40:10,060 --> 00:40:13,500
But my mother said, I ain't raising no
quitters.
511
00:40:14,340 --> 00:40:15,380
So I quit quitting.
512
00:40:15,740 --> 00:40:16,900
We could try hypnosis.
513
00:40:17,320 --> 00:40:21,800
Bro, I don't care how many pocket
watches you try and wave in front of my
514
00:40:21,940 --> 00:40:23,180
It ain't gonna work, son.
515
00:40:23,420 --> 00:40:25,240
You can't magnetize me.
516
00:40:25,620 --> 00:40:26,620
Sleep.
517
00:40:29,840 --> 00:40:30,840
Shorty.
518
00:40:33,140 --> 00:40:34,140
What's up?
519
00:40:34,460 --> 00:40:36,740
Tell me about your mother.
520
00:40:38,360 --> 00:40:39,339
Damn, nigga.
521
00:40:39,340 --> 00:40:43,200
Let's start with something light. Like,
do you lick ass? Yes or no?
522
00:40:43,500 --> 00:40:44,520
The answer's yes.
523
00:40:45,930 --> 00:40:48,230
So what happened to her, Shorty?
524
00:40:50,630 --> 00:40:51,830
She was coming home.
525
00:40:53,150 --> 00:40:55,290
Her car was parked on the side of the
road.
526
00:40:56,130 --> 00:40:57,250
Someone was in it.
527
00:40:58,190 --> 00:41:00,050
And something bad was happening.
528
00:41:04,410 --> 00:41:05,830
Why didn't you call anyone?
529
00:41:06,270 --> 00:41:07,270
I couldn't.
530
00:41:07,370 --> 00:41:08,450
I had a warrant.
531
00:41:18,730 --> 00:41:19,930
I started young, nigga.
532
00:41:21,330 --> 00:41:23,890
Oh, what do you see?
533
00:41:25,890 --> 00:41:31,790
I see a big explosion of water.
534
00:41:33,750 --> 00:41:35,510
It was like a silver light bulb.
535
00:41:39,890 --> 00:41:41,550
Police said it was a murder -suicide.
536
00:41:43,170 --> 00:41:44,370
She killed that man.
537
00:41:44,610 --> 00:41:48,110
When they opened the car door, his
little body just slid out.
538
00:42:06,430 --> 00:42:08,030
You're paralyzed.
539
00:42:09,950 --> 00:42:13,690
Now, sink into the chair.
540
00:42:14,010 --> 00:42:15,310
No, wait. Sink.
541
00:43:21,770 --> 00:43:22,770
Thank you.
542
00:43:51,400 --> 00:43:52,400
This has been Elon Musk.
543
00:44:24,590 --> 00:44:28,050
probably right. She's tough, but let's
see her get stabbed in the cut.
544
00:44:28,270 --> 00:44:29,490
I'm gonna die.
545
00:44:29,910 --> 00:44:31,530
Bobby, you're already dead.
546
00:44:32,010 --> 00:44:36,810
This hallucination is a manifestation of
my own guilt for being an awful mom. Or
547
00:44:36,810 --> 00:44:38,390
it could be this room's I just popped.
548
00:44:39,970 --> 00:44:41,390
You're gonna die.
549
00:44:41,930 --> 00:44:44,370
Bitch, you ain't killing me.
550
00:44:50,490 --> 00:44:51,630
You're gonna die.
551
00:45:01,580 --> 00:45:02,700
Everyone smiles in here.
552
00:45:03,700 --> 00:45:08,160
Oh, um, could you point me in the
direction of the ICU?
553
00:45:08,580 --> 00:45:10,040
That way or that way?
554
00:45:10,900 --> 00:45:11,900
Visiting hours are over.
555
00:45:12,120 --> 00:45:13,120
Oh, yes, of course.
556
00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:51,460
And that's your lap. See, people think
it's your lap, but it's actually
557
00:45:51,460 --> 00:45:54,200
shopping. Boy, your hair look like
fondue. It's dirty.
558
00:46:30,700 --> 00:46:31,700
like that shit.
559
00:46:33,560 --> 00:46:34,560
Hello?
560
00:46:36,160 --> 00:46:37,160
Fuck this.
561
00:46:42,180 --> 00:46:43,180
I'm gonna miss you all.
562
00:47:11,210 --> 00:47:15,110
Not to murder you or anything like that.
Then why are you wearing gloves?
563
00:47:16,230 --> 00:47:21,130
Would you believe I am thinking about
dressing up as O .J. Simpson for
564
00:47:21,130 --> 00:47:22,470
Halloween? But those fit.
565
00:47:23,730 --> 00:47:24,730
No!
566
00:47:25,010 --> 00:47:28,370
Not cool, bro. You almost can't fit. I
mean, no!
567
00:48:06,780 --> 00:48:08,880
I've got to get better writers.
568
00:48:11,200 --> 00:48:14,520
Wait until I stick my knife at them.
569
00:48:20,890 --> 00:48:22,990
I'm crying over here.
570
00:49:14,310 --> 00:49:16,050
Excuse me, out of the way.
571
00:49:16,290 --> 00:49:18,750
Step aside. Did you please get a gift?
572
00:49:19,210 --> 00:49:20,210
Yippee!
573
00:49:20,770 --> 00:49:21,770
Who?
574
00:49:24,390 --> 00:49:25,910
Ah, you son of a bitch.
575
00:49:34,860 --> 00:49:39,580
I'll keep your mom in check. I'll keep
your mom in check. I have the pain. The
576
00:49:39,580 --> 00:49:45,420
agony. Sarah, if I don't make it.
Seriously, Tish. Stop trying to win an
577
00:49:45,500 --> 00:49:47,260
It's a horror movie. It'll never happen.
578
00:49:47,780 --> 00:49:48,980
Just ask Demi Moore.
579
00:49:50,080 --> 00:49:51,900
No. No. No.
580
00:49:52,580 --> 00:49:53,660
No. No. No.
581
00:49:54,120 --> 00:49:55,120
No.
582
00:49:56,340 --> 00:49:57,340
No.
583
00:50:03,600 --> 00:50:06,100
Me knew you were going to be here.
584
00:50:07,880 --> 00:50:09,340
You should have known.
585
00:50:09,940 --> 00:50:11,240
You should have known.
586
00:50:24,340 --> 00:50:27,960
Smell my finger.
587
00:50:35,690 --> 00:50:36,770
Fuck your ass.
588
00:50:40,410 --> 00:50:41,410
That's my ass.
589
00:50:42,350 --> 00:50:43,410
Any last words?
590
00:51:05,440 --> 00:51:10,680
And that's another day of me getting
paid mad money for doing absolutely
591
00:51:10,680 --> 00:51:13,320
nothing. Why you stupid motherfuckers
watch.
592
00:51:14,040 --> 00:51:18,160
I want to give a smooth shout out to my
sponsor.
593
00:51:19,380 --> 00:51:20,740
Angry Orchard.
594
00:51:35,630 --> 00:51:38,790
legend in the streaming game, give it up
for Kyle Simmons!
595
00:51:48,830 --> 00:51:51,010
Let's get serious. What brings you to
the chat?
596
00:51:52,190 --> 00:51:55,470
I've been calling you. You ghosted me.
597
00:51:56,530 --> 00:52:01,490
Bro, I thought that was one of my crazy
ass baby mamas. That's my bad. Speaking
598
00:52:01,490 --> 00:52:04,790
of ghosting, somebody wants to talk to
you.
599
00:52:06,030 --> 00:52:07,030
Hello?
600
00:52:47,790 --> 00:52:48,790
Go smack the -
601
00:54:08,680 --> 00:54:14,400
wife hates you you believe the earth is
flat and you voted for trump three times
602
00:54:14,400 --> 00:54:20,740
now what's the vote for the woman huh i
believe shorthand is the notorious ghost
603
00:54:20,740 --> 00:54:26,300
face you did
604
00:54:26,300 --> 00:54:31,760
look pretty sketchy i
605
00:54:31,760 --> 00:54:38,680
got the wrong guy and you know that
because you're sick no So it's only the
606
00:54:38,680 --> 00:54:39,680
restaurant.
607
00:54:41,240 --> 00:54:42,240
I don't know.
608
00:54:42,700 --> 00:54:43,760
That guy's black.
609
00:54:44,400 --> 00:54:46,240
Kind of. Not that black.
610
00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:48,180
Like gravy brown.
611
00:54:51,560 --> 00:54:53,180
Hit him with your strong hand.
612
00:54:55,160 --> 00:54:56,160
Arrest him anyway.
613
00:54:56,400 --> 00:54:57,600
Probably did something, right?
614
00:54:58,640 --> 00:55:00,280
Turn off your body cams.
615
00:55:00,960 --> 00:55:03,180
This hailstorm, welcome back.
616
00:55:03,560 --> 00:55:05,920
Doc, I'm begging you. You gotta help me.
617
00:55:06,160 --> 00:55:08,860
younger. These little bitches are
killing me out there. They're wearing
618
00:55:08,860 --> 00:55:14,220
but a sausage casing and a ring light.
Trust me with this withered, decrepit,
619
00:55:14,340 --> 00:55:18,000
age -ravaged body and I will make you
whole.
620
00:55:18,420 --> 00:55:20,700
One year away's white lady special
coming right up.
621
00:55:20,920 --> 00:55:24,600
Thanks. I'm going to play a quick video
on the ins and outs of the procedure and
622
00:55:24,600 --> 00:55:25,600
then we'll get started.
623
00:55:29,560 --> 00:55:32,000
Do you wish you weren't so old and
saggy?
624
00:55:33,020 --> 00:55:34,280
Do you wish you were younger?
625
00:55:35,150 --> 00:55:36,150
Up here.
626
00:55:36,450 --> 00:55:37,450
Fuckable again.
627
00:55:37,950 --> 00:55:43,190
One single injection unlocks your DNA,
creating a new barrier.
628
00:55:44,910 --> 00:55:47,090
This is the stuff.
629
00:55:48,430 --> 00:55:52,810
Doc, this isn't that Buena Paltrow crap
that makes you smell like a vag, is it?
630
00:57:39,400 --> 00:57:40,400
You were thinking it.
631
00:57:40,800 --> 00:57:44,460
White chips to my ass.
632
00:57:44,820 --> 00:57:47,280
I feel very fucking new.
633
00:57:47,780 --> 00:57:50,900
I feel very fucking new.
634
00:57:52,680 --> 00:57:53,980
Hey, Sarah.
635
00:57:55,760 --> 00:58:02,280
Tuesday, I tried to visit you. I am
sorry for everything, especially
636
00:58:02,280 --> 00:58:06,060
your name. It was Taco Tuesday. I was
super drunk.
637
00:58:06,410 --> 00:58:08,970
But I promise you, I will kill this
motherfucker.
638
00:58:09,370 --> 00:58:13,090
It's fine, really. We're cool. I'm not.
We're getting to the car. I'm going to
639
00:58:13,090 --> 00:58:14,390
take you to the car.
640
00:58:14,610 --> 00:58:16,370
I got stabbed in my death, dumbass.
641
00:58:16,650 --> 00:58:19,130
I'm taking Jews away from all of this.
642
00:58:20,370 --> 00:58:25,670
I tried to run, too, but it follows.
643
00:58:26,890 --> 00:58:30,590
Now you're probably expecting a
flashback to that movie, but it's too
644
00:58:31,110 --> 00:58:32,810
Yeah, and you're probably going to have
sex.
645
00:59:10,160 --> 00:59:11,280
Candyman. Candyman.
646
00:59:11,980 --> 00:59:13,820
Are you sure about this? Yeah.
647
00:59:14,140 --> 00:59:15,420
Keep saying it.
648
00:59:16,700 --> 00:59:17,700
Candyman.
649
00:59:39,400 --> 00:59:40,400
that candy, man?
650
00:59:41,080 --> 00:59:47,920
I got weed gummies, K -nuts, and what
takes
651
00:59:47,920 --> 00:59:53,160
you so long to show up? Come on,
Clarence. I called you five times,
652
00:59:53,160 --> 00:59:55,780
up in three. You ain't even call me on
the phone.
653
00:59:56,100 --> 00:59:59,340
Lucky I was walking by and heard y 'all
through the hole in this wall.
654
00:59:59,660 --> 01:00:00,660
Fix that shit.
655
01:00:00,760 --> 01:00:05,080
You shut your ass up. You need to go to
a proctologist and get your skin looked
656
01:00:05,080 --> 01:00:08,320
at. Having acne over the age of 40 is
wild work.
657
01:00:08,720 --> 01:00:11,820
I look better than this, nigga. Maybe on
this side. Hey, ain't no time for
658
01:00:11,820 --> 01:00:14,660
beating. We about to be high as fuck. We
gon' party, son.
659
01:00:15,960 --> 01:00:19,960
Happy Halloween, y 'all.
660
01:00:20,360 --> 01:00:21,480
Rock out with that face.
661
01:00:21,920 --> 01:00:22,779
That's right.
662
01:00:22,780 --> 01:00:23,780
Pick up.
663
01:00:24,220 --> 01:00:25,220
Hey.
664
01:00:25,480 --> 01:00:27,020
I love it. Come in there.
665
01:00:27,480 --> 01:00:28,480
You look so good.
666
01:00:28,920 --> 01:00:29,920
You seen your sister?
667
01:00:31,820 --> 01:00:32,820
Ray,
668
01:00:33,320 --> 01:00:34,320
you seen Gay?
669
01:00:34,500 --> 01:00:37,120
I can't find her since she went to that
protest.
670
01:00:37,700 --> 01:00:38,700
No.
671
01:00:44,560 --> 01:00:45,560
Nah, Brenda, that's gay.
672
01:00:46,300 --> 01:00:48,500
Jake Gyllenhaal from Brokeback Mountain.
673
01:00:49,220 --> 01:00:52,220
I wish I knew how to quit you, but I
can't.
674
01:00:53,580 --> 01:00:55,080
You love that movie.
675
01:00:55,840 --> 01:01:01,660
Hey, Brenda, have you seen my big old
bag of candy? It had chocolates,
676
01:01:01,720 --> 01:01:06,360
lollipops. It's going missing. No, no,
no, it's not missing. I passed it out to
677
01:01:06,360 --> 01:01:07,360
the sugar treaters.
678
01:01:07,600 --> 01:01:09,380
Brenda, that's mustache.
679
01:02:23,620 --> 01:02:24,620
Hey!
680
01:02:39,580 --> 01:02:43,220
Do you know how many baby seals die from
microplastic?
681
01:02:58,360 --> 01:03:01,840
My god, he stabbed her. Not her.
682
01:03:02,060 --> 01:03:03,760
My pronouns are they them.
683
01:03:04,000 --> 01:03:05,280
He stabbed them.
684
01:03:05,520 --> 01:03:08,520
I'm over 40. How am I supposed to keep
up with all of this?
685
01:03:08,820 --> 01:03:09,820
He's not wrong.
686
01:03:10,080 --> 01:03:14,900
It's Karens like you that keep the
patriarchy going with their knees on our
687
01:03:14,900 --> 01:03:17,660
necks. Now you're playing the race card?
688
01:03:17,920 --> 01:03:20,540
I have enough of her shit. Bad shit,
bitch.
689
01:03:29,740 --> 01:03:33,840
Good, ignore the insults. They don't
realize we're here to help them.
690
01:03:34,200 --> 01:03:38,500
Toxic masculinity and mansplaining
doesn't help anybody.
691
01:03:38,920 --> 01:03:40,560
How is my masculinity toxic?
692
01:03:40,900 --> 01:03:42,500
I love women and sports.
693
01:03:42,940 --> 01:03:44,100
Just not together.
694
01:03:44,360 --> 01:03:45,360
Come here, bitch.
695
01:04:03,950 --> 01:04:05,210
Uncle Shorty? What's up, nephew?
696
01:04:05,890 --> 01:04:07,030
Can I ask you something?
697
01:04:08,070 --> 01:04:09,070
Yeah, sure.
698
01:04:10,390 --> 01:04:13,990
It's about, you know, how to go down on
a girl.
699
01:04:14,870 --> 01:04:16,050
You talking about eating pussy?
700
01:04:16,930 --> 01:04:19,070
Yes. I'm so cringed, but yeah.
701
01:04:19,370 --> 01:04:22,930
So maybe if you stop talking like a 14
-year -old white girl, you can learn
702
01:04:22,930 --> 01:04:25,130
something. All right, so listen up.
703
01:04:25,350 --> 01:04:29,450
First thing you gotta do, you gotta
spread the man. You gotta open it up.
704
01:04:29,450 --> 01:04:30,450
one of those things.
705
01:04:30,690 --> 01:04:31,890
Sometimes you can use two.
706
01:04:32,440 --> 01:04:33,720
Two fingers, like that there.
707
01:04:34,480 --> 01:04:38,920
Now, once you get it all in there, now
you gotta use your tongue.
708
01:04:39,220 --> 01:04:40,500
You can't be afraid of it.
709
01:04:43,600 --> 01:04:45,220
Lean into it.
710
01:04:45,640 --> 01:04:47,220
No, no, no. You're doing it too fast.
711
01:04:48,740 --> 01:04:49,740
Listen.
712
01:04:49,960 --> 01:04:51,680
You gotta be gentle. You gotta talk to
it.
713
01:04:54,000 --> 01:04:55,000
Boom.
714
01:04:56,980 --> 01:04:58,320
It's like rolling in the blood.
715
01:04:58,640 --> 01:05:00,040
All you gotta do, nephew,
716
01:05:03,880 --> 01:05:04,880
Suit that shit.
717
01:05:06,140 --> 01:05:07,140
Got it.
718
01:05:07,440 --> 01:05:11,580
And, uh, if you want to learn to lick
ass, that's your mama.
719
01:05:12,620 --> 01:05:16,220
Oh, you feel so good.
720
01:05:17,260 --> 01:05:19,440
Oh, oh, oh, yeah.
721
01:05:20,040 --> 01:05:22,540
Elle, I want to try something.
722
01:05:22,840 --> 01:05:25,100
I thought you said you'd never let me
pet you.
723
01:05:25,320 --> 01:05:26,320
What? No.
724
01:05:26,940 --> 01:05:27,940
Relax.
725
01:05:28,280 --> 01:05:29,600
I just want to taste you.
726
01:05:32,000 --> 01:05:33,000
Okay.
727
01:05:34,680 --> 01:05:35,720
Dinner time.
728
01:05:36,560 --> 01:05:38,480
Oh, yeah. Come here, baby.
729
01:05:39,820 --> 01:05:42,300
Oh, careful.
730
01:05:42,680 --> 01:05:43,880
Mikey's a gangster.
731
01:05:44,280 --> 01:05:46,960
Oh, it is gangster.
732
01:05:47,340 --> 01:05:50,820
Okay. He's already want some more. Yeah.
733
01:05:54,740 --> 01:05:58,640
You feel so much better and better than
them.
734
01:05:58,860 --> 01:06:02,240
Get back in there. Yeah, lick it.
735
01:06:04,780 --> 01:06:06,720
I need to finish her.
736
01:06:07,740 --> 01:06:10,460
Oh my god!
737
01:06:14,040 --> 01:06:15,540
Just like rolling a blunt.
738
01:06:16,720 --> 01:06:18,340
Now all I gotta do is hit it.
739
01:06:21,420 --> 01:06:22,420
Ow!
740
01:06:26,360 --> 01:06:28,220
What the fuck? Hey there.
741
01:06:28,540 --> 01:06:30,260
We heard tell of a Halloween party.
742
01:06:30,820 --> 01:06:34,340
You did now, didn't you? We're here to
drink and play bad music.
743
01:06:34,680 --> 01:06:35,780
Do some half -gay shit.
744
01:06:36,480 --> 01:06:37,700
Why just half -gay?
745
01:06:38,220 --> 01:06:39,220
Can I help you?
746
01:06:39,580 --> 01:06:41,040
If you'd just invite us in.
747
01:06:41,580 --> 01:06:42,840
Why do you need an invitation?
748
01:06:43,220 --> 01:06:46,460
White folks show up to parties uninvited
all the time with their little nasty
749
01:06:46,460 --> 01:06:49,740
-ass casseroles. Bland as shit. Y 'all
better start using some Lowry.
750
01:06:50,180 --> 01:06:53,780
And why she got them dirty -ass feet?
Looked like you was walking around porn
751
01:06:53,780 --> 01:06:56,120
sets all day. Got them trailer block
toes.
752
01:06:56,400 --> 01:06:59,140
I think you're in the wrong place.
753
01:06:59,560 --> 01:07:00,560
Y 'all playing?
754
01:07:01,220 --> 01:07:03,720
No. We believe in music.
755
01:07:04,350 --> 01:07:07,190
inequality. How about we show y 'all?
It's okay, no.
756
01:07:08,450 --> 01:07:14,750
Well, we're moving on up to the east
side to a
757
01:07:14,750 --> 01:07:17,710
deluxe apartment in the sky.
758
01:07:18,830 --> 01:07:22,450
We're moving on up. It gentrifies the
jealousy.
759
01:07:22,890 --> 01:07:26,510
Wheezy's rolling around in her grave
right now. You can't do this to the
760
01:07:26,510 --> 01:07:27,510
national miracle.
761
01:07:43,400 --> 01:07:46,920
in one of those frat parties where they
drink until they black out and wake up
762
01:07:46,920 --> 01:07:50,160
with their booties hurting, not knowing
what someone in a cowboy hat did to
763
01:07:50,160 --> 01:07:51,160
them. Yeah, what?
764
01:07:52,180 --> 01:07:56,480
Okay, well, we will leave you guys
alone, but we're going to walk real slow
765
01:07:56,480 --> 01:07:58,440
in case y 'all change your minds.
766
01:07:59,480 --> 01:08:02,240
Change your minds yet?
767
01:08:02,460 --> 01:08:03,700
No. Hell no.
768
01:08:04,620 --> 01:08:05,620
How about now?
769
01:08:05,800 --> 01:08:06,980
No. No.
770
01:08:07,420 --> 01:08:08,520
Yes? Hell no.
771
01:08:11,980 --> 01:08:13,300
Right folks, it's getting weird.
772
01:08:15,660 --> 01:08:16,660
Guys,
773
01:08:17,460 --> 01:08:20,439
I think I saw an open window over here.
That window's closed.
774
01:08:20,760 --> 01:08:21,760
Not for long.
775
01:08:45,550 --> 01:08:47,870
I thought inhalers were the worst plot
device in every history.
776
01:08:48,149 --> 01:08:51,890
That's true. Should have been in vain.
But we're here now, so let's make the
777
01:08:51,890 --> 01:08:53,810
most of it. And wear the white clothes!
778
01:08:55,350 --> 01:08:56,350
Sarah?
779
01:09:00,710 --> 01:09:03,950
Hello. Get your sister and get out of
there right now.
780
01:09:04,250 --> 01:09:06,550
Okay, hon? I am a grown -ass woman.
781
01:09:06,970 --> 01:09:10,810
Mother, I don't have to do anything
you're telling me to do. That's the
782
01:09:10,810 --> 01:09:12,630
where your son -in -law killed those
people.
783
01:09:13,050 --> 01:09:14,450
Someone wanted to get him there.
784
01:09:15,310 --> 01:09:18,870
Which means someone wants to get me
there.
785
01:09:19,210 --> 01:09:23,770
Oh my God, this isn't about you. Why are
you doing this? Because you are so
786
01:09:23,770 --> 01:09:24,890
fucking far away.
787
01:09:25,689 --> 01:09:28,250
Wait, hold on. Are you tracking my
phone?
788
01:09:28,649 --> 01:09:31,029
Shh, you're breaking up. Yeah, shh.
789
01:10:03,660 --> 01:10:05,800
Okay? I just found this thing in the
shed.
790
01:10:06,020 --> 01:10:07,020
Jeez.
791
01:10:12,960 --> 01:10:14,160
Come on, bro.
792
01:10:14,800 --> 01:10:15,920
That's even worse.
793
01:10:17,060 --> 01:10:21,240
I didn't mean it that way. Some of my
best victims are black.
794
01:10:24,700 --> 01:10:27,840
And another brother falls victim to gun
violence.
795
01:10:28,280 --> 01:10:30,520
Turns out race is still an issue.
796
01:10:30,880 --> 01:10:31,880
That's not fair.
797
01:10:32,090 --> 01:10:34,190
You know, black eyes usually die first
in horror movies.
798
01:10:38,010 --> 01:10:41,690
Yeah! Just give a whole new meaning to
Dead by Daylight.
799
01:10:42,550 --> 01:10:43,550
Yeah.
800
01:10:46,830 --> 01:10:48,250
Goofy ass out of here.
801
01:10:50,510 --> 01:10:51,510
Hello,
802
01:10:52,430 --> 01:10:53,430
shorty.
803
01:10:54,570 --> 01:10:55,570
Get him, baby!
804
01:10:57,390 --> 01:11:00,170
You were about to be hired.
805
01:11:09,920 --> 01:11:12,520
Oh, why are you running backwards, son?
806
01:11:12,780 --> 01:11:13,940
Oh, no, it's not me.
807
01:11:14,300 --> 01:11:16,700
Something's wrong with me. Man, you're a
motive of the day.
808
01:11:17,360 --> 01:11:20,120
Game on, bitch.
809
01:11:51,499 --> 01:11:56,180
I am NOT the killer.
810
01:11:56,600 --> 01:11:58,240
I'm not even that positive.
811
01:11:58,500 --> 01:11:59,500
I'm a virgin.
812
01:11:59,880 --> 01:12:00,880
No way.
813
01:12:14,440 --> 01:12:15,540
Act three, bitches.
814
01:12:17,580 --> 01:12:18,580
What?
815
01:12:19,600 --> 01:12:21,000
What does that even mean?
816
01:12:22,340 --> 01:12:24,140
It's when the shit goes down.
817
01:12:58,320 --> 01:12:59,920
Do you have one bigger in black?
818
01:13:00,340 --> 01:13:01,840
Oh, right. Thanks.
819
01:13:03,200 --> 01:13:05,920
Hey, who are you? John Wick?
820
01:13:06,140 --> 01:13:08,680
I would have said ballerina, but nobody
saw that shit.
821
01:13:09,460 --> 01:13:10,460
Let's do this.
822
01:13:10,920 --> 01:13:11,920
Okay.
823
01:13:14,880 --> 01:13:15,880
Help.
824
01:13:16,320 --> 01:13:17,320
Help me.
825
01:13:17,560 --> 01:13:19,760
I just would not make it if you leave.
826
01:13:19,980 --> 01:13:21,040
What do you think?
827
01:13:22,140 --> 01:13:24,100
I think Drake lost to Kendrick.
828
01:13:31,300 --> 01:13:34,900
Oh, that's definitely a trap. She don't
know where the baby's at.
829
01:14:55,639 --> 01:15:00,900
Hello. Looks like you forgot the first
rule of surviving a horror movie. Never
830
01:15:00,900 --> 01:15:02,460
answer the phone.
831
01:15:03,620 --> 01:15:06,640
I thought the first rule was you never
press the lever.
832
01:15:08,640 --> 01:15:11,800
Really? Well, I'm changing rules. How
about that?
833
01:15:12,720 --> 01:15:13,720
New rule.
834
01:15:14,120 --> 01:15:15,600
Go fuck yourself.
835
01:15:16,220 --> 01:15:17,220
Wait, wait.
836
01:15:18,320 --> 01:15:20,920
Why do you hate closets so much?
837
01:15:21,180 --> 01:15:22,620
I told you to come out.
838
01:15:22,880 --> 01:15:24,480
Yeah, well, I didn't want to get shot.
839
01:15:41,269 --> 01:15:46,950
It was about losing his wife. I'm sure
it's not an allegory.
840
01:16:22,700 --> 01:16:23,700
Those girls look good.
841
01:17:31,400 --> 01:17:33,560
I know your sister Wednesday, Tuesday.
842
01:17:34,100 --> 01:17:36,820
Have to clarify that for legal reasons.
843
01:17:37,240 --> 01:17:38,960
But I prepared you for this.
844
01:17:39,420 --> 01:17:40,800
So go on, baby.
845
01:17:41,160 --> 01:17:42,320
You kill him.
846
01:18:12,330 --> 01:18:13,330
listen to Doofy.
847
01:18:13,530 --> 01:18:15,030
The love interest.
848
01:18:15,970 --> 01:18:21,330
It just seems too obvious, you know?
Which makes you think it is not obvious.
849
01:18:21,570 --> 01:18:22,570
Yeah,
850
01:18:22,870 --> 01:18:24,690
well, that's the twist.
851
01:18:25,190 --> 01:18:26,510
Now get in the kitchen. Go.
852
01:18:27,430 --> 01:18:28,430
Okay,
853
01:18:28,850 --> 01:18:29,850
listen up.
854
01:18:30,570 --> 01:18:35,070
See, there hasn't been a great horror
movie since the first one.
855
01:18:35,350 --> 01:18:36,670
We're going to save the franchise.
856
01:18:37,210 --> 01:18:38,610
Go get our special guest star.
857
01:18:44,300 --> 01:18:46,340
Why else would there be a scary movie 6?
858
01:18:46,600 --> 01:18:50,420
It wouldn't work with just the new
characters, would it? We need the legacy
859
01:18:50,420 --> 01:18:55,860
characters. Oh, and there wouldn't be a
Cindy without her sassy black sidekick
860
01:18:55,860 --> 01:18:59,520
Brenda. You ain't have to say black with
no heartbeat like that.
861
01:19:38,990 --> 01:19:39,990
his franchise.
862
01:20:16,620 --> 01:20:18,680
I did Kevin, and Kevin said no.
863
01:20:18,920 --> 01:20:21,980
Kevin Hart said no? That little
motherfucker said just everything.
864
01:20:22,540 --> 01:20:23,539
Yeah, he does.
865
01:20:23,540 --> 01:20:26,020
But wait, there's more.
866
01:20:27,680 --> 01:20:30,500
Shut up, bitches!
867
01:20:31,320 --> 01:20:34,300
Ray! Shorty! Yeah, that's right.
868
01:20:34,760 --> 01:20:37,540
For Black Killers.
869
01:20:37,760 --> 01:20:38,800
We're making history.
870
01:20:39,660 --> 01:20:42,040
It's a new definition of Black
excellence.
871
01:20:43,080 --> 01:20:44,720
But why would you do that?
872
01:20:45,000 --> 01:20:46,000
Question it is.
873
01:20:46,830 --> 01:20:51,090
Why would you try to make a sequel
without us, huh? Yeah. When the studio
874
01:20:51,090 --> 01:20:53,770
to replace these brothers, I was there.
875
01:20:54,250 --> 01:20:55,228
That's that.
876
01:20:55,230 --> 01:20:56,230
What about me?
877
01:20:56,530 --> 01:20:59,810
What about you? You were in one scene in
part four.
878
01:21:00,230 --> 01:21:04,190
Yes, but I made that motherfucker Dr.
Phil cut his foot off. And he crazy now.
879
01:21:04,290 --> 01:21:05,290
Yeah, he got weird.
880
01:21:05,570 --> 01:21:09,570
But you see what they trying to do? They
trying to pit us all up against each
881
01:21:09,570 --> 01:21:12,610
other. They trying to start black on
very black crime.
882
01:21:12,810 --> 01:21:13,809
That's right.
883
01:21:13,810 --> 01:21:14,810
Yo, Shaq.
884
01:21:16,110 --> 01:21:19,650
I'm proud of you, bro. You've had an
amazing career as a sports commentator
885
01:21:19,650 --> 01:21:20,990
since retiring from basketball.
886
01:21:21,230 --> 01:21:23,450
And I love the big podcast.
887
01:21:23,690 --> 01:21:24,690
I love that shit.
888
01:21:25,210 --> 01:21:28,410
Even though I don't understand a word
you be saying, you be on that show until
889
01:21:28,410 --> 01:21:31,530
I... Kobe.
890
01:21:33,550 --> 01:21:34,550
Enough.
891
01:21:34,770 --> 01:21:38,170
But my point is, nigga, I love your
shit.
892
01:21:39,570 --> 01:21:41,490
But I never got over Kazam.
893
01:22:03,030 --> 01:22:06,810
What the fuck you talking about? I'm
doing it for the culture. What culture?
894
01:22:07,070 --> 01:22:08,070
Culture club.
895
01:22:08,190 --> 01:22:12,130
Come on, Ray. We're killing people. Stay
focused. All right, all right. We back.
896
01:22:13,030 --> 01:22:16,010
Hey, don't you worry. We family.
897
01:22:16,470 --> 01:22:17,850
Mad respect.
898
01:22:18,370 --> 01:22:22,050
Hey, Black is nominated for eight Emmys.
My nigga.
899
01:22:23,230 --> 01:22:25,370
Actually, the show was only nominated
for five.
900
01:22:25,630 --> 01:22:27,410
I was nominated for eight.
901
01:22:37,200 --> 01:22:38,200
But you never would.
902
01:22:38,280 --> 01:22:39,280
What?
903
01:23:15,180 --> 01:23:16,180
What about you?
904
01:23:16,840 --> 01:23:21,420
Well, I had a chance to work with the
incomparable Charlie Shane.
905
01:23:23,580 --> 01:23:24,519
That's good.
906
01:23:24,520 --> 01:23:27,000
He's a legend in his dick games. Crazy.
907
01:23:27,280 --> 01:23:32,120
You know, he slept with 47 ,000 women
and a thousand of them women were dudes.
908
01:23:32,580 --> 01:23:33,580
Lucky guy.
909
01:23:34,840 --> 01:23:37,440
Wait, so y 'all gonna kill us now?
910
01:23:38,140 --> 01:23:39,140
Nah.
911
01:23:40,880 --> 01:23:43,540
What would Halloween be without Jamie
Lee Curtis?
912
01:23:44,090 --> 01:23:45,890
Or Scream B without Neve Kim.
913
01:23:46,170 --> 01:23:47,370
That would be Scream 6.
914
01:23:47,670 --> 01:23:50,210
How did you guys pull all of this off?
915
01:23:50,510 --> 01:23:54,030
Sandy, you know how many Wayne's is
there off?
916
01:23:54,610 --> 01:23:55,790
Make a billion.
917
01:23:56,330 --> 01:24:00,030
Billions. I'm just so happy that the old
gang is back together.
918
01:24:00,750 --> 01:24:03,010
Okay, in the middle, on three.
919
01:24:03,450 --> 01:24:04,450
Corn 4.
920
01:24:04,790 --> 01:24:05,790
Uh -oh, no, no.
921
01:24:06,470 --> 01:24:07,750
That's corn. That's white.
922
01:24:08,530 --> 01:24:10,430
What about the young?
923
01:24:13,550 --> 01:24:19,250
Or the old and then the beautiful. Or
the cute and the crusty. Yeah, or the
924
01:24:19,250 --> 01:24:20,270
and then the sweet.
925
01:24:26,530 --> 01:24:28,850
We were brought in to take over the
franchise.
926
01:24:29,190 --> 01:24:30,169
That's right.
927
01:24:30,170 --> 01:24:32,510
You made me like 70 years old.
928
01:24:37,130 --> 01:24:39,170
I should drag that one to a sewing.
929
01:24:46,120 --> 01:24:48,920
The fuckers always come back. Oh no. Not
this time!
930
01:24:49,240 --> 01:24:50,240
Exactly.
931
01:25:40,080 --> 01:25:41,360
You can dress up like a bodybuilder.
932
01:25:42,300 --> 01:25:43,300
I'm a little dressed.
64402
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