Original subtitles

SHAW BROTHERS (HK) LTD. A SHAW STUDIOS PRODUCTION

HEX AFTER HEX

STARRING LO MENG, LIU LAN-HSI

LAY DAN, HON KWOK-CHOI, LAW HO-KAI

SPECIAL APPEARANCES BY CHAN LILY, CHU KE, LAY SIU-KWAN,

LOU DA, CHENG SIU-PING

CAST: YU TOU-YUN, YANG CHIH-CHING, LI PENG-FEI, WANG QING-HE

TO SIU-MING, LIANG SHANG-YUN, SHEN LAO, CHOW KIN-PING,

SAI GWA-PAU, LAM BING-SANG, HO PAK-KWONG, LIN WEI-TU

SCREENWRITER: SZETO ON SET: JOHNSON TSAO

CINEMATOGRAPHERI LI HSIN-YEH CAMERA ASSISTANT: YANG KUN-SHAN

LIGHTING DIRECTOR: CHEN FEN LIGHTING EXECUTIVE: LAY TIE-ZHI

STAGE PHOTOGRAPHY: KIONG KAI-MEN

PROPS DIRECTOR: YUAN XIANG PROPS LEAD: GUO-SHAO

MAKEUP: LIU JI-CHENG, PAN MIN-HUA HAIR STYLISTI PENG YEN-LIEN

COSTUMES: LIU CHI-YU

EDITING DIRECTOR: MEI XING-LONG EDITING EXECUTIVE: ZHANG ZAO-XI

OPENING DESIGNER: HUANG JIN-BA MUSIC: SU ZHEN-HOU, CHENG JIN-RONG

SOUND RECORDISTI HSU PING-KUANG

STUNT DIRECTOR: HUANG PEI-CHI, CHIANG CHUEN, CHU KE

ASSISTANT DIRECTOR: FANG RUI, DAI JUN-DE

EXECUTIVE PRODUCER: YE JIN-HONG, YE BAI-CHUEN

PR: LIAO FENG-PING STAGE MANAGER: FANG-ZHENG

Gold! This one is hefty!

Buddy, I put that bag here.

You did?

I'm going to give it to you.

- Give it to me? - Yes.

Let's talk in your apartment.

Take a good look.

Besides gold and jewelry, what else is in there?

- Nothing. - Keep looking.

SPIRIT TABLET OF LAY A-CHUI

"Spirit tablet of daughter Lau A-chui."

Why is there a spirit tablet?

This is my daughter. Her name is Lau A-chui.

- Get that doomed thing out of here! - Listen to me.

My daughter was already married to Yi Lui,

your neighbor across from you,

but he turned out to be a playboy.

He liked the flight attendant next door.

My daughter got angry and left him, but she needs a home.

Young man, you sure are lucky.

Look at you. You have muscles all over.

My daughter loves muscles.

This time, she has chosen you.

What?

You want her to marry me?

Yes, that's right.

If you become my son-in-law, I'll give you a house.

- We can sort the paper work right now. - Are you kidding?

Marry a ghost? No, thank you! Leave!

I'm not scared of anything but ghosts!

Take this cursed thing back! Get going!

Young man, are you so afraid of ghosts that you will refuse gold and a house?

No means no. Leave!

Are you serious? You're such a big fellow.

- How can you be scared of ghosts? - So what? Leave, old man!

Sweetie, you have to agree.

I've tried my best.

You like that he's big and muscular,

but he's afraid of you.

There's nothing I can do.

It's late now.

Go and sleep. Be a good girl.

Sweetie, just give up on him.

Do you understand?

Where have you gone now? You're so naughty!

One here and one there.

Hey, when the shots are fired, just jump down from here.

It'll be fine.

Puffer, what are these things stuck all over me?

Puffer, Will I be OK?

Don't worry!

You will be OK! They're just blood bags!

Don't worry!

- We're all set! - OK, we're filming!

Quiet on set!

You four, when I count to three, fire your guns up there.

Ready.

Rolling. One, two, three!

- Director, the wire is visible in the shot. - NG.

- NG! - The director said NG!

Hey, Muscle.

- The director said NG. - What's NG?

NG means "no good". It means we're going again.

What? Again?

I'm injured all over for just a couple hundred bucks!

No, thank you! You can do it!

Muscle!

Hey, explosives guy! You overdid it!

- Hi. Have you been waiting long? - Hi.

Suk-yee, which disco should we go to tonight?

- That's so boring. - Look at this lunatic.

Me? You're the lunatic.

Miss.

You got it dirty. You're stinky and vulgar.

Mind yourself.

- Here you go. - Thank you.

Hey, what did you say? Repeat it.

- Let's go. - Repeat it.

Old houses are full of rats.

You guys are going to die this time.

Eat! Eat up!

Goddammit.

Suk-yee, why are you sitting in the back?

Suk-yee, I clearly saw you get in the back.

I didn't. My stockings tore as soon as I came out.

- No way. - It's infuriating.

That was strange earlier.

Hi, Muscle.

- I'm Yeung Suk-yee from next door. - Are you looking for me?

Yes. Who else would I be looking for?

Give me a second.

Ms. Yeung, aren't my muscles cool?

Don't call me Ms. Yeung. We're friends.

Call me Rosy.

Rosy? That's a nice name.

- What's wrong? You poor thing. - Be gentle.

Who beat you up?

It's tough being an extra for Shaw Brothers.

- I see. - Where's your boyfriend?

It was just a fling. That's over.

You're going too far.

I want to keep going south.

You had better head north.

If you don't like it, I'll leave.

Rosy!

Rosy?

Rosy!

Rosy!

Rosy!

Muscle.

I'm in the bedroom. Come in.

Why are you standing there like an idiot?

I scared myself, thinking I missed out.

Come.

You tricked me.

- I'm over here. - Don't you run!

Go11 you!

Who's making all that noise?

How annoying.

It's so noisy so early in the morning.

Who is it?

The Housing Department wants to demolish the building!

My goodness! You're showing everything! That's gross!

Everyone, listen up.

On behalf of your boss, the government, I'm here to notify you.

In accordance with Article 222 of the Housing Ordinance,

the government has decided to reclaim this building

and repurpose this land as a park.

Sir, we've been living here comfortably.

You can't tell us to move all of a sudden, right?

That's right! If you force us, I'll report you to the Chinese government!

You have the right to do so.

But before the clock strikes midnight

on June 30th, 1997,

this still belongs to our boss.

So all of you have to move!

If you're not happy about it, you can file a complaint at our office.

Alright, then. Excuse me.

Where are we going to move to?

Where will we go?

How can they take back our building and turn it into a park?

Muscle, you have to help us or we'll have to sleep on the streets.

Help us out.

Let's petition the governor tomorrow.

' Yes! ~ 0K!

Brothers, unity is strength!

- Yes! - We'll protest!

Unity is strength!

- Strength! - Strength!

- We shall protest! - Protest!

- United to the end! - To the end!

Sir, we have a petition letter for the governor.

You're submitting a petition? Line up in the back.

- Line up! - Dude, get in line!

- Don't cut the line, man! - Don't cut the line!

- Get in line! - Sir.

Salute!

Sir, I'm a representative of Ma Chai Hang's squatter settlement.

He will take care of it.

Sir, my wife ran off.

- OK, he will take care of it. - Thank you.

Our building is being demolished.

OK, he will take care of it.

- Stand closer together. - Smile!

Rosy!

- Did you submit the petition? - Yes.

How did it go?

The governor will take care of it. I can eat without worry!

He doesn't even know he was fooled.

This is the 6:30pm news.

Today, a group of Chuk Yuen residents submitted a petition...

Been

- ... protesting the reclamation... - Look, that's our petition.

Rosy, it's me!

Silly. Take a good look.

...had already approved the land to be used as a park.

Why did you mt me?

That means I love you.

They even get to film inside.

Rosy.

Look, the Westerner is holding the letter that I submitted!

No wonder so many people watch TVB News!

They report authentic news! Amazing!

Burn it all.

What? They burned our petition.

They disregard public opinion!

We'll lose our homes.

Rosy, what should we do?

Why are you asking me? How should I know?

They take us for fools!

Alright, I'll help on this just once for your sake.

Watch out! Danger! Move!

Are you trying to kill me?

I'm sorry, I'm in a hurry. I'm sorry!

- Muscle, come and help! - Coming!

Alright. Make way!

- Watch out! - Are you crazy?

Do you want to kill someone?

You should just "take a load off".

Come on! You nearly killed him!

- I'm sorry. - Move it!

Excuse me.

Rosy, I left something very important. Watch our things.

Over there. Come on.

Hurry up! Move faster!

Gather around!

Excuse me!

Listen up. Start demolishing from here to there.

Excuse me. Watch out.

Watch out. Don't touch her. Be careful.

- Don't touch her. - What a pervert!

You can move my things.

I've made several trips. You can move the rest.

I'll sit and wait for you.

Are you serious? Last time, you weren't wearing pants.

Now, you have this doll all naked!

Could you be more disgusting? Gross!

He's a pervert!

Wow! That was cool!

Let me try my hand at it.

You idiot!

- Do you want to break everything? - No, Mom!

Let's go.

3446, search over there.

- Open the door. - Yes, sir.

Fatty, look inside the room.

- Siu, go over there. - Yes, sir.

Roget

Sir, there's a woman inside who refuses to leave.

She just keeps licking and licking.

- Find a female officer. - Come.

Officer, go with Fatty and see what she is licking.

- Yes, sir. - Yes, sir.

Are you serious? A woman licking something?

I clearly saw a woman. How did she turn into this?

- I have no idea what happened. - Whatever. Kick her out first.

No, we don't know what that is. Let's report it first.

Sir, the woman turned into a thing.

Turned into a thing? What thing?

That thing looks very familiar.

Which film did I see it in?

Star Wars!

- Yes, Star Wars! - Yes!

Shut up!

Are you serious? Are we shooting a film? Come with me!

Damn it, Fatty.

You just graduated.

How dare you try to fool me?

I'll make you walk the beat around jewelry stores.

You'll be caught in shootouts in no time.

- Let's go! - Yes, sir.

Hurry up. Demolish over there.

Nobody is inside. You can demolish it.

- OK, got it. - Hand me the microphone.

- Hey, come with me. - Calling Control.

Hurry UP-

Come!

Come over here. Hurry up.

- Do we go upstairs? - Go.

Get to work. Hurry up.

Why did the door suddenly close?

Darth Vader!

Are you trying to scare us?

Do you think we're weaklings?

Hold this.

I'll demolish you like this building!

Are you trying to scare us with that stick?

It's real!

No!

I was just joking with you.

Run!

- Open the door quickly! - It won't open!

- Open it! - It won't open!

No!

Shit, we're done for!

We're dead meat.

We're going to die!

' Run! ' Run!

There are people running naked!

How gross!

Don't run!

What are you doing? Why are you running naked?

We didn't want this. Darth Vader from Star Wars is up there.

He swung a lightsaber and we were all naked!

This place is haunted!

Really?

I don't like this. I'll consult my superiors first.

- Pack it up! - Pack it up!

Pack it up.

Rosy, I told you to watch our things.

Where did you go? I've been looking for you.

I've been going here and there with my lollipop.

Are you for real?

We don't have to move anymore. Help me move back in.

- Really? - Yes! Come on.

Rubik's Cubes!

Neat and inexpensive! Buy one to play with!

Twist left, twist right! Twist Rubik's Cubes every day!

Kid, buy one.

The song is new,

but these toys are a bit outdated.

I don't even play video games anymore.

Idiot!

You little jerk!

Listen, go home. Get lost!

- Kids these days... - Police are coming!

Damn you, Puffer!

Was that fun?

Selling Rubik's Cubes? That's so outdated.

That job as an extra last time got me injured all over. Look!

Do you think acting in movies is easy?

- Do you have a driver's license? - Of course.

Under the sky-high 20% interest rates,

all of our properties have come to a dead halt.

In the first half of the year,

the Sik Ji Gei Real Estate has lost 600 million.

The Wan Yuen Real Estate has lost 400 million.

How much has Puck Hik lost?

We've lost 800 million.

Royal jelly.

Our off-plan property sales are terrible.

Many even gave up their down payments and ran off.

What about the client who purchased 100 units? Did he run off?

- Yes. - Did you find him?

We did find him, but unfortunately, he became shark food in Mirs Bay.

Royal jelly.

How about the sales of our company's Beautiful Village?

We ran a 20% off promotion

with free furniture, gas, and electrical appliances,

and even hired a superstar to advertise for us.

So how many units were sold?

Out of 500 units,

only a quarter of a unit was sold.

How can there be a quarter of a unit?

Only a parking spot was sold!

- Sir, this is the new driver. - Send him in.

- Please come in. - Thank you.

- What's your name? - Muscle Tsang.

Excuse me.

Hello? Gai-sing?

Is it about real estate? Lily, fill him in.

- Yes, I know. - Our company doesn't offer anything.

No paid time off, no labor insurance, no medical services,

no staff housing, no end-of-year bonus,

and no toilet paper either.

- So, there's nothing at all. - Miss.

You guys have nothing. So, let me ask you, what do you have?

We have New Freedom sanitary pads. Do you want that?

- Yes. Better than nothing. - Do you want the job?

- Yes. - Lily, show him out.

What's your name?

Call me Muscle. And you?

Are you new here? Hello.

Are you kidding? Your company has nothing!

Why are you shushing me?

I've never met anyone so stingy. He's so unapproachable.

- There's nothing here. - That's how it is. Don't tell anyone.

If he finds out, you'll be fired.

- Here, have some water. - Thank you.

Sit anywhere you like.

- What the hell? - I'm sorry.

So, he was hiding and slacking off.

His wife gave birth last night. He didn't sleep all night.

Why did you remove his jacket?

I didn't know. I'm sorry.

Chan Tai-man, come to the manager's office at once.

Sir, I didn't mean to. I'm sorry.

What good is that? Why did you do that?

I'll be fired for sure!

- Sir. - I've caught you slacking off.

Sir, my wife gave birth last night. I spent all night with her.

- That's why I napped. Give me a chance. - She gave birth to your baby, not mine.

How does it concern me?

Sir.

It's cruel to fire me over this.

Sir, give me a chance. My wife just gave birth.

Stop whining. You'll get an extra month of wages. Now get lost.

You're a disgrace.

- How could he do that? - That's awful.

Your boss is ruthless.

All bosses are terrible.

- We're just employees. - He's extra terrible for a boss.

- He's coming out. - Hey.

HEY-

How did it go? Were you fired?

My wife just gave birth. Now I've been fired. Isn't that sad?

Sir, I'm sorry for getting you fired.

It's not your fault.

They're blocking the camera with a cloth?

I'm not afraid of getting fired.

I'll report him to the Labor Department!

I blocked the camera,

but if the boss heard you, you'll lose that extra month of wages.

I've already been fired. Why bother?

Goddamn boss! Fuck you!

- Don't. - What do I have to fear?

Chan Tai-man!

You cursed me in English!

You won't get that extra month of wages!

Goddamn boss, you're so sneaky!

So a camera is hidden here.

- Get out of the way! - Don't!

I'll smash it to smithereens!

Spying on us, are you?

Die!

I'll use my secret weapon on you.

- What is it doing? - What's this?

You goddamn peasants are dead meat!

Hooray!

- What's going on? - Listen, everybody!

On behalf of Puck Hik Land Development,

I'm here to negotiate with you.

Negotiate what?

OK, quiet down.

According to the government's blueprint, all the land here belongs to our company.

Take a look.

- Right here. - What's the point?

- This is proof. - Why bother looking?

Calm down! Quiet down!

This can't be.

If you don't like it, negotiate with the government.

Or petition the governor.

Sir, what's the use of a petition?

I've already tried. He doesn't care about us.

- That's right. - Hey! Who do you work for?

But it's true.

You land developers are outrageous!

We've lived here for decades. We paid property taxes every year.

How could you make us leave?

It's unreasonable!

We're not moving! Burn this place down if you dare!

Every one of you is vulgar. I won't bother talking to you!

- What did you say? - Excuse me. Make way.

You're the vulgar one! Rich guys aren't civilized!

- You're a stain on society! - Drive.

Do you think you rich guys are so great?

- You're terrible! - What a fancy car!

You got it from selling our land, you horrible guy!

Here.

Toss it.

Stop up ahead.

Don't worry. Leave it to me.

This bastard would dare to use arson.

What?

Your boss hired someone to burn down a building?

What does the arsonist look like?

I'm not telling you. Women are so nosy.

Does the arsonist look like this?

Yes!

How do you know?

Intuition.

Intuition?

Seriously?

Muscle.

Come quickly.

- What? - Carry the gas.

- Follow me. Hurry up. - How annoying.

Madam, I want a paper outfit.

- Men's or women's? - Men's.

- Wait here. - Rosy.

What are you up to?

I can tell you, but you'll have to obey me.

I wouldn't dare to disobey you.

How much will that be?

Three dollars.

Wonderful!

Your charms, I cannot resist

For you, my lips are puckered

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.

My mom is your mother-in-law. You'll eat incense later, hooray!

All done.

Do, re, mi!

Who's knocking when I'm showering?

How annoying!

- What do you want? - Gas delivery.

Buddy, I didn't order gas.

You're Hakka! Me too, buddy!

Why are you denying that you ordered gas?

I don't want it.

What gas? I didn't order this. Take it away.

I don't want it!

You don't want it? I want you to take it.

Take it.

Even if you want me to take it, I won't take it. Take it back.

I'll spank you!

How dare you spank me? I'll get you!

Hold this!

Hey, get out!

I don't want it! Damn you.

How dare he mess with me?

Even if you're as fierce as tigers and crabs,

I'll mess you up.

And how will you do that?

Like that, you dummy.

Hurry and crawl back into your hole.

- Go.

No one is here.

Today is not my lucky day!

- Did you finish shopping? - Yes.

Hey, buddy. What are you spraying?

The Urban Council knows

about the bad living conditions and all the bugs,

so I've been sent here to spray pesticides.

- What is he saying? - He says he's spraying pesticides for us.

Mr. Wong, we don't get electricity or water here,

- but the Urban Council is good to us. - Yes.

Buddy, why does it smell like gasoline?

- That's right. - This is a new product made of gasoline.

Give me the paper outfit.

- Burn it. - Burn it?

Hurry UP-

Rosy, how did that happen?

I've learned magic.

Magic? You've learned it?

Yes. Didn't you know?

Look at that.

Hilarious! Rosy!

Where did she go?

What is he doing?

He wants to start a fire!

- It smells like gas! - He's not wearing pants! Goodness!

- Catch him! - Don't run!

- Get him! - He wants to start a fire!

- Arsonist! - Get him!

- Stop! - Don't run!

Stop!

Get him!

Me? Do you like me?

That's great. How about we get together?

My butt is on fire!

Goodness! Why would you steal poop?

It stinks!

Jerk, you stole my chicken and gave me a spittoon in return!

Give me back the chicken!

Help!

Serves you right!

How dare you set homes on fire? I'll teach you a lesson!

Take this!

It must be a great film!

My dear colleagues,

please listen to me.

Although bank interest rates have dropped back down,

our company and all construction sites

have ground to a halt.

Folks, in order to revive the prestige of our company,

our jobs,

and to trick clients into buying off-plan properties,

I beg for your help.

I ask all employees to line up

around the clock, tirelessly, and without complaint at our sales office

and pretend to be buyers.

Sir, asking us to pretend to be clients won't work.

You guys drove up property prices!

What?

Hong Kong people will always jump on the bandwagon.

Go right now or I'll fire all of you!

There's nothing we can do. The boss gave an order.

It's so sunny. I can't believe this.

Our boss is the worst.

- This is outrageous. - He made us stand in line!

It's so sunny and crowded.

What if I get a heatstroke?

Muscle, you're not the only one in the sun.

The Westerner is too.

- This gush-- - This guy?

- He's an influential figure. - Really?

Who is he?

- He's very well-known. - Really?

He is Sir Thomas Jackson.

He's established the Tiger Bank across the street.

So he's so important.

- Yes. - No wonder he has a statue.

Everyone knows that Tiger Bank makes money for the big boss.

He's the founder of Tiger Bank.

- So the big boss should really thank him. -Indeed.

He's the one profiting off all Hong Kong people!

I just praised him! I take it back.

- He's a proxy for the big boss. - Time to eat.

- Let's eat. - Let's eat first.

- Give me one. - Here you go.

How come it's raining?

What the heck! You drenched my meal!

How can I eat it now?

I'm sorry. Here, take mine.

No!

Mr. Wong, take cover. You'll catch a cold in the rain.

- Here, come on. - Where are you moving me?

- Sit closer. - Thank you.

Our damn boss did this to us. Curse his children!

Mr. Wong, are you OK?

I'm OK.

The old fellow dozing off, come in at once.

I pay you to come in to work,

not to doze off.

Sir, here's the thing.

In the sales line yesterday, I got drenched in the rain.

I have a fever right now.

That is your business.

Don't give me excuses.

Handle these.

Yes, sir.

Workers nowadays whine about working,

but demand a high pay.

Every one of them is insufferable.

You calculated these accounts all wrong.

Sir, I can redo them.

Redo them?

This is not a charity

or a nursing home.

Collect an extra month of wages and get lost.

Sir, that means you're firing me!

Please don't, sir! I beg you, don't fire me, sir!

- Please! - Scram!

I don't want to give you an extra month of wages.

The Labor Department forces me to.

Don't, sir. Please.

- Sir, please don't. - Lily, take him away.

Mr. Wong, come on.

You don't need to kick me out. I'll leave on my own.

I'll leave on my own!

I'll leave on my own. I'll go.

- I bet he was fired. - You don't need to kick me out.

- I'll leave on my own! - How pitiful.

- I'll go. - Mr. Wong.

He's already an old man.

This is bad! I saw Mr. Wong enter the restroom with a rope!

Go and check on him!

- Mr. Wong! - Mr. Wong!

Get him down!

- Put him here! - Be careful!

Call the police! Hurry!

Do CPR on him!

We can go to the ER in the boss's car!

" CDK! " Hurry!

Doctor, how is the old man?

This is him.

- Is that him? - Yes, Doctor.

Muscle is back.

- Muscle! - Muscle, how is Mr. Wong?

- How is he? - Muscle, how is Mr. Wong?

- How is he? - He's dead.

Did you hear? He's dead!

The boss is coming out.

Hey, what's the matter with you?

You drove a dead guy in my Mercedes-Benz 600!

You pushed Mr. Wong to death!

What did you say?

I said you took a life!

Leave right now!

I wanted to quit long ago! Die!

I would've left anyway. Spiteful and heartless man!

Rosy, tell me.

Our colleague, Mr. Wong, was already old.

The boss ordered him to stand in line outside

in the sun and the rain.

He even ordered him to work overnight.

In the end, he died!

That's not all. I drove Mr. Wong to the hospital in the boss's car.

He fired me, too!

Tell me, how can there be such a despicable person?

I'll kill you!

Die!

Die, you horrible boss!

This boss is awful.

I'll teach him a lesson.

I left something behind.

- Go on ahead. Bye. - Bye.

Let's go.

- What are you looking for? - A ghost!

Ghost!

- What is it, sir? - Come here.

Come.

Lily, I bought a bracelet for you at Lane Crawford.

- It's beautiful. - I also bought something for your mom.

Ghost!

There's a ghost in my room!

He's insane!

He said he had a gift for me, but pushed me.

He suddenly fired me, saying I was a ghost. He's insane.

I'll just work for someone else.

- New secretary, please come in. - Yes, sir.

Sir, what can I do for you?

Type out two copies of this for me.

You don't have to leave. Just use my typewriter.

OK.

- All done. - Have a seat.

OK.

"A,

“B, C,D,E,F, G“?

I'm sorry, sir. I don't know how to type.

That's alright.

A, B, C, D, E, F, G

That's cute.

You don't need to know how to type to be my secretary.

You just need big boobs and a big ass.

OK?

I'm sorry, sir.

That's OK. It's a cheap thing.

Rosy, I would like to take you to dinner

and then have some fun at the country club.

How does that sound?

What do you say?

Of course.

Rosy, I'll cook a nice dinner for you tonight.

Frog legs,

stir-fried, fried, steamed, braised, grilled, four-eyed, and tiger-style!

Chop...

Don't run!

Stop!

Running off, are you?

You're so clever, hiding in a jar.

Where can you run now?

I can't pull it out.

Do you want to hide?

My arm isn't long enough.

Spraying me with piss?

Alright.

I'll grab you.

I'll grab you!

Grab you!

I've got you this time!

Let's see if you dare to piss at me now.

- Muscle, you're still up. - How come you're back so late?

I asked you why you're back so late. Why aren't you answering me?

- Answer me, OK? - I don't want to tell you.

You don't want to tell me?

Well, I insist that you tell me. Tell me now.

I was working.

- Why are you so angry? - I never got back so late.

Get out!

Listen up! You're sleeping on the couch tonight!

Could she be having an affair?

- I'm sorry to make you wait, sir. - That's alright.

They're really having an affair!

'H...

- What was that? - Officer.

Stop right there.

You sure are bold, walking away after insulting me!

Officer, what time is it?

Are you blind?

I can't see anything but black.

I am visually impaired. See for yourself.

It's true.

It's half past six.

Half past six. Thank you.

The visually impaired are so pitiful.

- Goodbye. I am very pitiful. - Be careful.

He can't see. How does he know I'm a police officer?

That hurts so much!

Are you OK?

He fooled me!

Hey, stop right there!

Allow me to introduce Rosy.

This is Mr. Chow.

- Have a seat. - Mr. Chow.

You were the dealer last time. It must be my turn now.

Sure, go ahead.

Johnny.

- Can I play with him? - Sure.

You are my lucky star. Go ahead.

- Please cut the tiles. - No need.

How much are we betting?

Just a little, 50,000 dollars.

Go ahead.

Dragon head and phoenix tail.

Roll.

- Odd number. - Please.

- Please. - Please.

- It's 1-2. - Also 1-2?

Are you kidding me?

What a coincidence!

I'm sorry, Mr. Chow. I also have 1-2.

So the dealer wins the tie.

Please cut the tiles.

- Please. - Have you cut them enough?

HSBC Bank.

Odd number.

Please.

What's wrong?

I can't say.

Rosy, will it be such a coincidence that it's a tie again?

Rosy, what's this tile?

I'm not telling you.

It's 1-2.

You also have 1-2.

A tie again.

You beat my rear hand!

I'm so sorry. It wasn't intentional.

Rosy, you're good at this.

Rosy, do you mind if I deal the next round?

Go ahead.

- Yes, sir? - Bring new tiles.

Please cut the tiles.

There's no need.

I trust you.

Zhang Fei shouted across the Changban Bridge.

Roll.

Even number.

Yours.

Mine.

Please.

Rosy, are you ready?

Don't bother arranging them. I've got pairs.

Well, pa)' Up-

Mr. Chow, please reveal my tiles.

What's the point? I'm winning for sure.

Earth and supreme?

I beat you in both hands. Now what?

This game is rigged! I'm not playing anymore!

Rosy, this is yours.

I won't take the money. Just treat me well.

CLOSING DOWN SALE

OK?

Sir, how much is this?

This one comes in a set of 14.

How about just one?

Fine. Business hasn't been good.

- It's 30 dollars. - OK. Wrap it up for me.

Sure.

How much is this bracelet?

It's beautiful.

I bought it at an antique store today. There are 14 in total.

- Fourteen in the whole set? - Yes.

There was a big sale. I bought one.

There's something else.

I bought a bracelet once worn by Empress Dowager Cixi for you.

Isn't it pretty?

- Did she really wear it? - Yes, it cost thousands.

It's pretty.

By the way, Johnny, can I leave early?

Sure.

- Just take these files outside. - Sure.

Mr. Tin.

The third installment of your interest payment is due.

Have a seat.

To be honest, the real estate business has been sluggish lately.

So I invested in taxi licenses.

But the prices dropped to 1,000 dollars each. It's tragic.

It's your fault for borrowing from the boss.

The boss will only give you a one-month grace period at most.

- I understand. - You can't delay anymore.

Have a good day.

Don't default on it.

All five million people in Hong Kong are at the mercy of us land developers.

How low we have sunk to be at the mercy of others?

Could this be karma?

I'm leaving now.

- Bye. - Bye.

Could it be Yeung Suk-yee?

It can't be. She clearly died.

- Finding parking is difficult now. - Yes.

Help watch my stall for me. I'm going to the restroom.

Wait a moment. I need to use the restroom.

Madam.

What is it?

Sir, your aura is bright with great fortune.

Because a lucky star shines upon you,

you will always win when gambling.

Moreover, a huge fortune is waiting for you to claim it!

When will this fortune arrive?

Fortune comes on its own time.

I cannot divulge heaven's secrets.

Sir, I wish you good luck.

Thank you, madam.

Grab yourself something.

Thank you.

How come you have this bracelet?

These things are sold everywhere.

That's true.

Johnny. Let's go.

That old lady said there's a huge fortune waiting for me to claim it!

- Really? - There's more.

The bracelet she's wearing is the same as the one I gave you.

Really?

- Yes, you can see it. - It's time for the movie. Let's go.

Chow, it's so strange.

When I went to the restroom, I think a ghost possessed me.

- Did you see me walk back to the stall? - Yes. I saw you come back.

Really?

How strange.

I feel like I haven't taken that dump that I went to take earlier.

It's coming out!

Mr. Wong, can you give me another week?

- Is that enough? - That's enough.

I'll get it by any means necessary.

Don't say I'm not being patient.

If you still can't pay the interest in a week, we will take legal action.

Do you understand?

Also, I'm warning you.

Don't make promises lightly.

If you can't pay by then, I can't help you.

- You know what our boss will do. - I know.

- Do you understand? - Yes.

- Sir. - Horsey.

If you were pure gold, I wouldn't be driven into a corner.

Unfortunately, you're not gold or a horse god.

- It's gold! - It is!

Rosy, that fortune teller was right.

- Really? - You're my lucky star!

There are a total of 14. So there are 13 more.

There are 13 more! Rosy, come with me.

Sir.

Come.

Here's the thing.

I want to ask you to valuate this horse to see if it is genuine gold.

Let me borrow your body.

POSSESSED

Well?

- Certainly. - Thank you.

Sir, where did you get this?

- I inherited it. - You hit the jackpot this time.

It's from the Western Han terracotta army.

The paint is from the Western Han, approximately 2,200 years old.

It was excavated in Yangjiawan, near Xianyang, in 1965.

This entire thing is pure gold.

This horse weighs about 1.5 kg.

Based on market value, it's worth about 150,000 dollars.

- That much? - There's more.

The set has a total of 14.

If you have the full set of 14,

it will be worth 20 times more!

We will purchase it from you at that price.

One is 150,000 dollars.

So 14 makes 2.1 million and 20 times of 2.1 million

is 42 million!

I'm rich!

Come on.

This is the store. This is it.

STORE CLOSING DOWN SALE DUE TO INSANE RENT INCREASE

Sir, where are the 14 horses?

- The terracotta army? - Yes.

The landlord is kicking us out and auctioning them off.

Come on. Which auction house?

Lamperts.

Thank goodness they're still here.

What's so funny?

Rosy, the auction is starting now.

I'm sorry.

POSSESSED

One million dollars.

One million dollars?

Linda, one million dollars for something like that?

Isn't it a waste to put them in the bathroom?

Don't you watch cigarette commercials?

Viceroy says, "|f you want to do it, do it."

You're right.

We spent millions renovating the bathroom.

What's another million?

Linda, you're brilliant.

Not really.

One is 150,000. Ten is 1.5 million. One times two is two.

Round down to two million. Multiplying that by 20 makes 40 million.

I have nothing to fear. Ten million!

I'll gain 30 million.

Twenty million.

Twenty-five million!

Thirty million!

Thank you.

Oh! I'm doomed.

Thirty-five million? Thirty-five million?

That means five million left of 40 million.

To hell with it.

Yes!

Do you think I should do it?

What should I do?

Four...

I don't want it.

POSSESSED

That's wonderful!

Rosy, we got it!

Great job!

They're all here.

All 14 are pure gold.

Hey, come in here.

What is it, sir?

- He's trying to scam me. Throw him out. - Yes, sir.

- I'm sorry, sir. - What are you doing?

These are all fakes. Please take them away.

If you can't afford them, you can be honest with me.

Why do this?

I'll sell them elsewhere.

It smells so good!

Even celestial beings can't resist the smell of dog meat!

Delicious!

Steaming hot!

Let me enjoy this.

Life should be about enjoyment.

We should drink in style.

You're fine and I'm fine.

Let's drink a cup of this green tea!

That guy clearly wanted to lowball us, but that's OK.

Stop right there!

Bastard, I let you go after firing me.

Now you seduce my girl and lie to me! I'll kill you!

Don't hit my case!

- Don't run! - Help!

Coward, I'll kill you!

Don't run, pervert!

I'll kill you!

Where can you run to?

I'll get you!

You ruined my meal!

I'll beat you the way that I beat dogs!

Crazy guy, are you trying to be a drunken master? Save it!

Do you know who I am?

Have you watched The Shaolin Temple?

The drunken staff wielder is my disciple.

Stop pretending! I'll hit you, too!

Don't run off!

Do you brush your teeth?

Even celestial beings can't resist the smell of dog meat.

It stinks!

My ass!

Don't run.

Don't run!

Have a bite.

Yummy!

Are you trying to run?

You hit me, so I'll make you smell my ham!

It stinks to high heaven!

Smell it. Doesn't it smell nice?

Small and easy to swallow. Yummier than dog meat!

Eat it!

Look at this.

Look at this.

Do you also want to look?

Here, look.

You're flashing people here again.

Officer.

What are you two doing?

Officer, it's a robbery. He wants to steal my gold.

- What gold? - In here.

What? You take my girl and also accuse me of stealing your gold?

Officer, this is genuine gold. Look.

Let me show you.

- Freeze! Hands up! - What's the problem, Officer?

- Stand over there. - Careful with that, Officer.

- Officer, are you serious? - Be quiet.

Officer, come on. He seduced my girl. Why did you handcuff me?

He's so annoying!

- Is this genuine gold? - Yes.

- Is it real? - Officer, look over there.

Why did you handcuff me?

I didn't seduce his girl!

Officer!

- How did that happen? - Let me go! I didn't seduce his girl!

Rosy!

- I handcuffed him instead. - Let me go. I didn't seduce his girl!

- Let me go. - How come you're handcuffed?

You can check.

L.-

Sir, how is it?

We already checked them. These are not gold. He's crazy.

- What? - OK, you tell him.

I don't want to talk to him.

Listen, we've checked all of these. These are not gold.

- Take them away. - Not gold?

- Hurry up. - No. I clearly had genuine gold!

You replaced my genuine gold with fake gold!

- I'll sue you! It was genuine gold! - Leave or I'll arrest you.

You switched out my gold!

- I'll sue you! Give me back my gold! - Take him away.

- I'll sue you! - Go!

- Give me back my gold! - You're crazy.

Leave!

POLICE STATION

It can't be.

No!

It's all plaster.

It's all gone.

It's all gone.

I've lost it all.

I've lost it all!

My 35 million is all gone!

My real estate company is done for! I've lost it all!

Big boss, save me!

I've caught you in the act! What do you have to say?

- Speak! - Let me go! Why are you so pigheaded?

I'm pigheaded?

I watched my girl get into a man's car and hold his hand.

Rosy, why did you have to pick the man who stabbed my back?

You shouldn't have followed me!

Should I just let you cheat on me?

Rosy, you nearly got me arrested!

- Why did he release me? - Do you know why he let you go?

- It's because I... - What?

What? Tell me!

- I can't be bothered with you! - Then so be it!

Do you think you're precious? Don't come back!

Suk-yee.

Suk-yee.

What? Are you trying to molest me? I don't know you.

I'm sorry.

She looks so similar.

DOORBELL

Are you looking for my girl? You two were done long ago. Leave.

Wait.

I have something to tell you. Do you want to know?

What? Do you want to steal my girl?

I know you and that girl are friends now.

You think you're a superstar, but you're just an idiot.

Let me tell you.

She's not human. She's a ghost.

Do you think I'm lying?

I killed her in a car crash.

I saw her die with my own eyes.

If you don't believe me,

you can check with the Traffic Accident Investigation Team.

You idiot.

Save yourself.

Good bye.

SPIRIT TABLET OF LAY A-CHUI

From what I know, when a female ghost haunts a man,

she won't leave until she absorbs all of his male energy.

Hold this for me.

I'm not trying to scare you, but in my opinion,

Rosy will come back and absorb all of your male energy.

Then I'm doomed.

The priority is to verify that she is a ghost.

When I was a kid,

I heard my mom say to place a knife in a basin of water,

aim it at the ghost, and she will show herself.

A basin of water and a cleaver.

Where should I put it?

Girl, I was wrong.

I came from the kitchen with a rose

My girl, don't be angry with me anymore

- Take it. - That's so corny.

Rosy, I bought your favorite roast chicken.

Come on.

- It's so romantic. - It smells delicious.

Have a seat.

I've been out all day. I want to shower first.

Sure!

Please.

Hold this.

- Muscle, I'm coming out. - OK!

- That was relaxing. - Really?

Sit down.

Thank you.

Rosy.

- Your nightgown today is so pretty. - Really?

It's true.

It smells so good.

What's wrong?

I just dropped a fork. I'm sorry.

The fork.

Muscle, what's the matter?

Ghost!

Ghost!

Rosy really is a ghost.

I'm in big trouble.

Puffer, what are you doing? Help me out!

How? You messed everything up.

Why are you afraid of ghosts when you're so big?

I'm not afraid of anything but ghosts, OK?

Sure.

Humans are afraid of ghosts.

And ghosts are...

- I've got it. That's it! - What?

We're afraid of ghosts. They're afraid of gods.

Just ask a god to drive her away.

Ask a god? How?

Learn spirit possession and invite a god into your body.

Muscle, this is Master Lau.

Master Lau Kar-leung, I've heard so much about you!

It's not Lau Kar-leung. It's Master Lau Kar-lin.

Compared to Lau Kar-leung, my kung fu skills are number nine,

but my spirit possession is number one.

- He's great. - OK, Master Lau Kar-leung.

It's not Lau Kar-leung!

- It's Lau Kar-lin! - I'm sorry.

OK, I'll let you join in.

A slice and a dot for the realm of spirits.

Three heavens on the left. Three earths on the right.

Thrice counterclockwise for the universe. Thrice clockwise for the sun and moon.

Here.

Spirits of heaven and earth, beseech the White Lotus Child Deity

to ensure Disciple Muscle Tsang's every victory.

The deity has agreed to let you in.

- You have passed the first lesson. - Thank you.

White Lotus Child, bless us. Blessed be the White Lotus Child.

Come and aid Disciple Muscle Tsang,

to teach, to test, and to be effective.

The deity has agreed to let you pass the third lesson.

You can set up altars on your own now.

Thank you.

It is a fine day to open a door between heaven and earth.

May the burning incense reach hundreds of thousands of miles away.

The last hour of the eighth day and eighth month of 1982 is auspicious.

I set up this altar

to beseech the Maoshan Dharma Master to exorcise ghosts and demons

by order of the Supreme Venerable Sovereign.

I offer incense once.

I offer incense twice.

I offer incense thrice.

I beseech the master to help me summon the ghost of Lau A-chui.

Spirits of heaven and earth,

beseech the master to help me summon the ghost of Lau A-chui.

Spirits of heaven and earth,

beseech the master to help me summon the ghost of Lau A-chui.

Spirits of heaven and earth,

beseech the master to help me summon the ghost of Lau A-chui.

Spirits of heaven and earth,

beseech the master to summon the ghost of Lau A-chui.

Spirits, beseech the master to summon the ghost of Lau A-chui.

Spirits, beseech the master to summon the ghost of Lau A-chui.

Spirits, beseech the master to summon Lau A-chui's ghost.

Spirits, beseech the master to summon Lau A-chui's ghost.

Muscle, why are you doing this to me?

A slice and a dot for the realm of spirits.

Three heavens on the left. Three earths on the right.

Thrice counterclockwise for the universe. Thrice clockwise for the sun and moon.

Disciple Muscle Tsang beseeches Master Zhong Kui

to appear and exercise his power

to expel ghosts and exorcise evil spirits

by order of the Supreme Venerable Sovereign.

NOW!

SHOW OFF YOUR POWER

MAGIC TALISMAN

I, Master Zhong Kui, by order of the Supreme Venerable Sovereign,

am here to capture and return the ghost of Lau A-chui to the underworld.

Muscle, no matter who you send to capture me,

I won't leave.

I, Master Zhong Kui, have come all this way, yet you refuse to leave.

Do you want to die?

Leave!

Infuriating!

You are quite audacious for a ghost.

You have no respect for an elder like me.

Female ghost, you are asking to be vanquished?

You think nothing of me! How maddening!

Playtime is over. I'll show you something.

Muscle, don't push me!

Master, please enter my body again.

BIND

No!

No! Don't, Muscle! No!

Begone, ghost!

Muscle!

_ Hey- " Yes?

- That busty girl is hot. - Yes.

- Let's bring her back to be an escort. - Sure.

Sit down.

Mr. Lau, this is a new girl for you to play with.

It's her first time.

- Really? - She has never done this before.

Mr. Lau, take your time and enjoy.

OK. Excellent!

What's the problem?

A ghost!

- A ghost? - Yes.

It's a ghost.

Mr. Lau, she's such a beautiful girl.

How is she a ghost?

Go and play with your little apple.

Go. Go on.

Little apple.

- That guy is so much trouble. - Ghost!

Get up.

Are you serious? Again?

Ghost! There's a ghost!

- Ghost! - Hey, you haven't paid yet!

You stupid girl.

How dare you prank him? You must have a death wish.

- Go! - What are you doing?

Fu, we got this girl from the disco.

We put her to work,

but she started messing with us.

I'll set her right in the kitchen.

Wait.

You still don't get it.

After all this time with me, you haven't learned.

You can't always use violence.

You need to use charm, too.

Pretty girl, have a seat.

Pretty girl, do you want money and hot guys to play with?

- Be a good girl. - OK.

Listen to what I say.

I won't treat you badly.

Do you want jewelry?

I'll give you a necklace.

She's having a fit.

Let her scream it out in the steel drum in the kitchen.

- Let's go. - Come on.

Get in there.

Cover it.

What's wrong with you?

When Rosy was here, you wanted her gone.

Now that she is gone, you pine after her all day long,

pretending to be innocent.

You won't get an award.

You seem close to bursting.

Let's go.

We'll go somewhere to relax.

Waiter, bill, please!

Why are we in a place like this?

- Sorry, we're closed. Come another day. - Help!

- Are you really turning us away? - We're closed.

Puffer, I hear Rosy yelling out for help.

Are you serious?

Why would Rosy be here?

Even movies don't have such coincidences.

Let's go. We're wasting time.

- Help! - Come another day.

Help!

This is Rosy's voice.

It does sound like it.

- Help! - Inside!

- Hey! - What are you doing?

Go to hell!

Rosy!

Stop right there!

Rosy, I'm coming to save you!

It itches!

It itches!

Run!

- Run! Ghost! - Run!

Run! Ghost!

Hey!

It turned back into a girl!

You pretended to be a ghost to scare us!

Get her!

Damn girl!

Cannonball!

- We are the best team! - We are the best team!

"Muscle and Rosy's one-year anniversary as friends. From Puffer."

Rosy, after this incident, I think

that humans have feelings and so do ghosts.

When ghosts possess humans, they are just like humans.

I'll never fear you again.

Enough philosophy! Do you think you two are Lui Kei and Connie Chan?

Blow out the candles!

Wait, buddy.

Ladies first.

- Ladies first. - Me?

|1I'S you?

How come you're a taxi driver now?

It's my secretary's fault.

She told me to buy terracotta horses.

I thought they were gold, but they were plaster.

I was put in a psychiatric hospital.

If I ever find her, I'll get my revenge!

Revenge? Your secretary is a ghost.

What? A ghost?

Yes. Didn't you know?

I didn't know.

She used to be my girlfriend.

But if you want revenge, I have an idea.

- Do you want to know? - Yes. What is it?

I'll hire a spirit possession master to capture her.

Then you can do whatever you want with her.

- What's the master's name? - Lau Kar-lin.

He's quite famous.

Spirits of heaven and earth,

capture the ghost of Lau A-chui.

Chili pepper.

Master, here's the pepper. It's very spicy.

Spirits of heaven and earth, obey the Supreme Venerable Sovereign.

Spirits of heaven and earth, obey the Supreme Venerable Sovereign.

Lau Kar-lin, are you looking for me?

Impudent ghost, you possessed a dead body

to do evil in the human world!

I shall banish you back to the depths of hell for eternity!

Dog blood!

All spirits, obey the Supreme Venerable Sovereign.

Banish this ghost to hell!

Banish this ghost to hell!

Burn her!

Spirits of heaven and earth, banish her!

Muscle, save me!

Rosy!

Statue Square?

Spirits of heaven...

- Help! - Puffer, piss on the altar.

" Hurry! - Help!

Muscle!

Goddammit, how could you piss on my altar? Get him!

Hey!

Lau Kar-lin, how dare you?

Rosy, are you OK?

Rosy, how are you?

Fine, I'll summon Sir Thomas to deal with you!

Hong Kong taxpayer Lau Kar-lin beseeches the big boss to help me

summon Sir Thomas into my body!

Look, the statue can move!

Rosy, let's go. Come on.

It can walk!

Master, do you rely on foreigners?

Do you think I'm afraid of Westerners? I'll beat them up all the same!

Gutsy!

I'm a big fellow.

But you're not afraid.

Then I'll summon the Monkey King to teach you a lesson!

Disciple Muscle Tsang beseeches the Monkey King to enter my body!

Muscle, save me!

Beat him up!

Genuine gold!

Franklin gold!

Is he paying us back? The big boss is paying us back!

Thank you very much!

Thank you very much!

Thank you!

That's unbelievable!

Thank you, big boss! The big boss is paying us back!

Thank you!

- Muscle is over there! - Let's go!

Muscle, you said you bought a building.

- So which one is yours? - I bought all of them.

- All of these? - All of these here.

- So many? - That one. And these too.

- Muscle Tsang's Estate. It's all mine. - Muscle Tsang!

Muscle.

- There are so many keys. - I'll assign numbers.

- Every person gets one. - Seriously?

Watermelon Slice, Block C, 18th floor.

Mrs. Wong, Block A, 18th floor.

- Thank you. - This is yours.

Are you giving an apartment to every one of us?

Is that true?

Such a good deal doesn't exist in Hong Kong.

You have to pay rent!

You said you're giving it to us. Why are you collecting rent?

- The monthly rent is one dollar. - That makes all the difference!

Go and check out your apartments.

Sir, the crown land you wanted to purchase is over there.

Sir, do you want to buy up these buildings too?

No need to.

I sold this to them.

Sir, property prices have been so low. Selling it doesn't benefit you.

I have such a high IQ.

I can make a profit in anything.

I just cut costs here and there and cut corners.

Sir, you're so smart!

The building was built with high-quality materials.

The window frame is American steel.

Not even the strongest typhoon can break it. Watch.

It's so fragile!

Sir!

Call the police!

A window fell from above and killed the boss!