Original subtitles

I think how it is

to be a young woman is chaos.

There is no other word that fits.

Of course it's chaos.

You're figuring out your life.

Bad bitches, to the left.

I overthink everything.

Like, I think a lot of what people think about me.

And... and you get tired of it.

The two last years, I have a lot on my mind.

My dad was killed.

Not many people know it. Not... I don't talk about it.

It was like a smack in your face.

You just see him walking out the door

and never coming back. It's so sad to think about.

I have, like, a memory of me and my dad driving

and seeing a car with dogs

like he was going to train, like sled-dogging,

and it just stuck.

And, like, just one day, somebody told me

about Folkehøgskole, and you can do it there.

So, yes.

I can feel it... very much. It's like a push behind you.

Yes. So, maybe it's him telling me that I need to go.

Who knows? Who knows?

Mm.

We are so glad to see you here,

all of you students.

Welcome to Pasvik Folkehøgskole and to this Folkehøgskole year.

We are a small school, but we have had students

from all over the world.

It's a lot more than a gap year.

We want our students to develop themselves,

try to find a new version of yourself.

Welcome.

Perfect. That's it.

Hmm.

My dad asked me to not be so annoying

to, like, everybody.

But... Not start quarreling.

Mostly that.

I think, like, I'm nice, but then again,

I'm kind of annoying.

Yeah, I think that's how people would describe me.

Yeah, I know they do.

They tell me all the time.

So, I don't have a lot of friends.

I find the thought of, like, finding friends

and keeping friends especially hard.

I am afraid for being lonely another year.

Being an outsider.

Okay, good morning!

I'm always a little bit nervous

when it's my first word of the day.

Today I'm going to talk about the brain.

We live now in a modern world.

Things are going quite fast, but we still have the same brain

as we had 10,000 years ago.

So, what happens when our 10,000-year-old brain

meets this, the modern world?

The life and environment we have now

is quite confusing for our brain.

The screens everywhere,

the phones around you all the time,

and we feel alone.

When you think about how people were living

10,000 years ago,

they were out hunting, gathering, sleeping outside.

So, this year we really hope

that we can wake up your Stone Age brain.

- I heard the birds just now. - Yeah?

I can hear it.

I don't know which bird it is.

Me either.

Okay, so, you will very soon

be responsible for taking care of the dogs in our dog yard.

In this dog yard, you will see that we have

a lot of different personalities.

Some are a bit shy.

Some are old and calm.

Some are young and very energetic.

And we want you to pay attention to that

while we're walking around.

So, this is Odin, Unka.

They are Siberian Huskies.

We got them from Russia, five, six years ago,

and they have the most beautiful voices.

His name is Billy.

And you can see he is very energetic.

So, he's not afraid of people.

He's also very eager to pull.

And he is quite smart.

He's just not so good at showing it.

Okay, we'll move on to Dia.

It's short for Diamant. "Diamond." She's a bit shy.

Probably, you will need to go up here

two or three or four days before she feels safe.

Dia, Dia, Dia.

Okay, Dia.

Dia, Dia, Dia.

If you sit on the small step there...

- Yeah? - Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Try. And try... Just sit there a little bit.

Yeah. Try to call her name.

Dia.

Dia.

Very good, Romain.

Just take it all the way out.

And then you have this knot that you make

with holding it like this, and then turning once,

and twice, and then putting it in.

And then you remember how to take in the rope?

- Mm? - Not really.

Wait, is it normal to do it with one hand?

- Yeah. - Okay, well...

I'm not really a confident person, and...

I struggle with it.

The first thing I will think is always going to be

negative and scared.

I don't know what to do about it.

I dropped out of high school.

I just couldn't do it.

Each year gradually got harder for me

'cause I just couldn't focus,

and I felt like it was not something I really wanted.

I was like, "Why is it not working?"

"Why can I not do this?" "What's happening?"

And so I was like, "Maybe it's because I need

some different type of life path."

I've never done anything like this before.

I didn't have a lot of time to think about it.

And so, yeah.

So far, I don't really regret it.

I hope to overcome

social anxiety, stuff like that.

Hi, baby!

Hear, King Neptune!

Hear, King Neptune!

For all the years that has passed...

For all the years that has passed...

...and all the years that is to become...

...and all the years that is to become...

...we the people from...

...we the people from...

...Pasvik People High School...

...Pasvik People High School...

...will baptize ourselves in the Barents Sea!

...will baptize ourselves in the Barents Sea!

Swim!

It's bear safe.

Whoa, whoa!

Is there just one day

where we don't have to get wet shoes?

Sautso.

Oh!

It's okay to make mistakes,

but we need to be safe.

You are responsible for another living creature,

an animal, a dog, or several dogs.

We are not here as individuals, we are part of a bigger group.

So, we need to make an environment

where we can trust each other and you will be prepared,

you will be focused, and you will be in the moment.

Romain...

you know what I like about Billy?

What you like?

What I like about Billy.

Well, what is there not to like about Billy?

Tell me.

Like, I prefer Billy over Mjød...

- Yeah. - ...because Billy,

he seems more social.

- Yeah... - Mjød is like,

- "Ah, just give me the rubs." - Yeah.

Billy is like, "Hey, come to talk to me."

"Come to talk to me, I like talking."

In the beginning,

the students think it's all about the dogs.

So, we use the dogs.

We use this beautiful and tough nature.

We use the team.

But the dogs are just a method.

Of course, we have a higher goal.

The higher goal is a human being.

The dogs teach us to be more human,

maybe more patient.

And we might pay attention to others even more.

And I think that

when the students discover this part

of dog mushing,

it becomes so much bigger.

Spoke too soon.

Don't brake, don't brake!

And you can just brake a little

around the curve, but not like hard braking,

because then you're going to slam into something.

So, later this winter,

we will drive downhill.

So, we take it step by step, yeah.

One, two, three, and four.

- It's a half turn. Five, and six. - Walk, walk.

Triple step, triple step. Walk.

Whoo!

Why don't you wear gloves?

I have gloves. I don't need them now.

You don't need them?

Not yet.

You just wait and see.

Yeah, I have them here.

I'll put them on if we're cold, thanks.

Come here, Sautso.

My favorite dog.

Adorable.

And you're adorable too.

So, now you had two ropes, didn't you?

- Two small ropes? - Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Nice.

Now, I think it's quite stable.

- Cool. - Uh-huh.

So, now you have to make a nice bed.

And these ones will be really nice

- also to make a bed for Mjød. - Ah.

Then it will be more comfortable for her as well.

Okay.

- I'm gonna get to work. - Yes, good.

You have to make

your own hot water.

You must melt snow.

Yeah, I don't have a fire.

I will make fire tomorrow.

My fire was shit.

So, I need to work on that today.

When I got up, everything collapsed

because it started to snow like crazy.

- Everything is covered in snow. - Mm-hmm.

And I... I'm losing my mind.

Yeah, it's... a little bit difficult.

It is a lot of work...

to keep the fire alive, to bring the wood,

to do everything you need to do to collect snow,

make food, there's always something to do.

And it is a lot of work, and you will get sweaty.

There's no way out of that.

Can I boil snow?

No, not now.

You need to go to your own camp now. Yeah.

But I don't have water, how am I gonna do it?

Same way as every other student does it.

What if I can't make the fire?

Yeah.

With this, you know what attitude instilling...

You know what that is, instilling?

- Mindset. - Mindset.

- Oh, okay. - Yeah.

Yeah, so I have the wrong mindset.

I said a lot of times I can't do this...

Uh-huh. - ...but somehow I still got

- convinced to do this anyway. - Yeah.

We think you can do it.

- We really think you can do it. - "We think you..." What?

Do you think or do you want me to do it?

I want you to do it.

- Yeah? - And I think

- you can do it. - Yeah.

Okay.

If we just say, "Yeah, you can use our fire now,"

then we're actually not helping you.

If you fall off the sled in the wintertime...

Mm-hmm. - ...and it's 30 below up here,

we know that you can attack a tree...

- Yeah. Hmm. - ...survive with the fire

until we pick you up.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

That's why it's so damn important to do it.

Yeah. Hmm. Hmm.

Look at that fireplace, Romain.

- Yeah. - You did it.

High-five.

- Mm-hmm. - Yeah.

Hmm. You're heading for the second night.

Is she trying to get into your sleeping bag?

- Yeah, a little bit. - Yeah.

- She's like a guard dog. - She's really cool.

- Yeah. - Hmm.

Yeah, I think she will stay close during the night.

- Yeah. - Hmm.

Sorry for, like, I don't know, being emotional.

But is it something wrong in being emotional?

I don't know.

I feel like if I make someone uncomfortable,

it's wrong.

I was not uncomfortable.

- Okay. - Mm-hmm.

And I actually think it's a good thing

- to be emotional. - Yeah.

It's much better to actually show your feelings

than hiding them.

Hmm, yeah.

So, don't feel sorry for being emotional.

I still think it might have been a step

too far, this whole trip, but...

- that's just my honest opinion. - Yeah?

- Yeah. - But you're here?

- I'm here. - You're warm?

- You're taking care of the dog? - Mm-hmm.

- You have eaten? - I have eaten.

Enjoying some chocolate now?

- Yeah. - Yeah?

Made yourself a nice bed?

- Yeah, I have. - Mm-hmm.

Yeah, and try to fall in love with your hat

when we go.

To what?

Fall in love with your hat.

- I will fall in love. - I really mean that.

- Put it on. - Uh-huh.

- Enjoy your night, Romain. - Yes.

- Good night. - Bye!

Don't forget your hat now!

Lately, I've been, like, struggling

inside my own bubble.

And in a lot of ways, you feel relatively powerless.

I've always been like that.

I remember in fourth grade, my dad invited me up

to watch TV with him and my mom.

And it's a show showing planets and stuff like that.

And then they start to talk about the sun.

And learning that the sun would... it will die...

terrified me.

Because how...

how could you live without the sun?

I ran out of the living room and sat down on the floor

beside the bathroom and started crying.

That was my reaction

to learning that the sun would die.

And my father then said that...

I would be dead long before the sun.

It really didn't help me.

You know, my father's really bad at trying to comfort me.

So, yeah, that was a...

That was a tough lesson.

That everybody is going to die

and the sun even is going to die.

Although it seems so eternal.

Are you just practicing campfire?

- Yeah. - Hmm.

Do you think it will-- Hege?

- Hmm? - Do you think

it will burn?

We need to get, like, big sticks.

We need big sticks again.

And I lost my saw.

Oh, but you can use your axe.

Can I use that to like...

- Sure. - Mm-hmm.

And give me that as well.

Oh, yeah, that's pretty smart actually.

You literally just mansplained everything to me.

No, I didn't mansplain.

I'm not the mansplainer.

You remember Iselin telling us

that we need to take a rope with us?

Because then you can take the higher ones.

- Yeah. - And then you can just...

- Yes. - Then you get big sticks.

Yeah. Hey.

How are you so good at everything?

No, I'm not.

Did you hear I fall often when we were sledding?

- I did as well. - Yeah.

Then we were both the same.

Nah.

So, if I'm good at sledding, you're too.

Mm-hmm. Wow.

I wish I had that mindset as well.

But that's life.

If everything was going your way...

where do you think you would be in life?

But I feel like nothing is going my way right now.

Same.

But still I'm here and I'm having a great time.

Hmm.

I don't know how to, like, talk.

I always feel like I say the wrong things.

- Or, like, if I talk... - No.

...I'm annoying, and if I don't talk, I'm boring.

And it's just... It's an endless battle, really.

And it's pointless.

So, fake it till you make it.

Yeah?

I would never recognize myself...

like, three, four months ago. And now I'm here.

This is an amazing fire.

You're getting good at this.

Aw, thank you.

Hmm.

It was painful, the sledding,

because you have to brake, and you have to crash,

and you have to stay on a sled whilst braking

- and not crashing... - Yeah, it's like...

...and falling down.

That was like...

It's so strange. Yeah, it's... it's tough.

It was fun though.

It feels scary when you lose control.

Yeah, often it does.

I think most people like to have...

- Yeah. - ...at least somewhat control

over what they're doing.

I'm having a hard time.

Sometimes I do think, like,

"Oh, my God, do I really belong here?"

And "Was this a mistake?"

I read this quote that said,

"The cure to loneliness is solitude."

That's actually true.

And if you don't engage that much, you don't...

really get disappointed.

He was running, like,

two weeks ago, and now,

he's gotten really sick very fast.

On his back, he gets cancer.

I'm sorry, baby.

He's a very beautiful dog.

He has a good life here, I think.

But yeah.

It's very sad.

I feel always I have the bad luck.

I think he's tired now.

I think he wants to sleep now.

When my father died, he was 48.

He got in, like, an argument with a man.

And the argument was done, and he turned his back,

and then they hit him in the head

three times back here.

So, the second one was... that killed him.

I think he would love being here.

My dad, I... He was kind of like a nature guy

kind of man... ...and it's very nice

just getting to know him again.

Almost, I don't know.

And I'm very bad. I feel so bad all the time

'cause I don't think about him enough.

I... I feel like my dad was a party,

and I think when I'm happy, I think about him.

Life is not sad, life is supposed to be fun.

When I stand on the sled...

I feel so light.

I think it activates something in my brain.

It's so quiet...

and it's just...

the best sound ever.

Whoo!

I never have my phone anymore.

Why should I be on my phone when I'm here?

Just being with the dogs makes you so happy,

and you don't feel lonely.

I kind of quit.

I wasn't intending on coming back.

It was kind of stressful, like a roller coaster, I guess.

I missed Norway.

Back home, I didn't think about all the negative stuff.

I would just think about the things that I like here.

I saw everyone going to their miserable jobs,

and trying to impress people they don't know,

or even care about.

And I was like, "Oh, what am I doing here?"

"I wanna go back."

I'm definitely gonna give this one a chance.

Whoo!

Hurry up, Romain! You can do it!

All right, hold on. You got this.

You can do it.

Don't touch the water.

Just go for it. You can do this.

You can do it, Romain!

Good job, Romain!

I think I want to do,

- "My fantastic gloves." Like... - Yeah.

"I've tried these gloves for a week,

- and I've never frozen since." - Yeah.

Like, "I'm happy, I'm satisfied."

Yeah, yeah.

But should that be, like, another person,

or should it be the same person, like a week later,

- when he has the gloves? - Well, like you say,

if I'm doing, like, the promotion...

Mm-hmm.

...then you could be the customer, you know?

So, you're the B-roll, and I'm the A-roll in this case.

Yeah.

Can we do, like, my monologue first though?

Yeah, sure. Yeah.

Do you struggle

with unbearable, freezing temperatures?

Are you unable to use your phone without exposing your hands?

Luckily, there's a solution.

Thanks to a brilliant mind of outdoor research,

these gloves are now on your hands.

- Do you struggle with un... - Wait, wait.

- I wasn't ready, sorry. - Oh, okay.

I thought we were just filming.

These gloves suck.

That's definitely going to be

on the end.

That's so going to be on the end.

Today is the best day.

My relation with Romain is that

I found him amusing to hang with,

and I could relate to some of his points of view.

So, I found it kind of natural to just hang with him.

I think Bjørn Tore is really kind.

I guess we kind of have, like, the same humor.

He doesn't care what other people

think about him that much.

I think my wish is that I can, like, think like that.

Romain, are you up there

in the eagle's tower?

- Yeah. - Yes.

The hill is very steep, I heard from Bjørn Tore.

- Yeah, but it's fun. - Yeah, it is.

Yeah, so, it's a little bit...

- it's a fun steep hill. - Yeah.

And your body is strong enough.

- Yes. - Yeah. Okay.

Well, thank you.

Then we meet in the dog yard

- at ten o'clock tomorrow. - Yeah.

- What if I fall? - Then when the dog stops,

yeah, hopefully, they will stop, because it's so heavy,

like this, and then you just quickly.

- Romain! - Thanks.

Fuck.

Good save.

Just hold the break now, Romain.

But I didn't know that the dogs were gonna stop.

Seriously, there's no danger of falling,

but then you just need to get back up again.

Oh, my God, moose!

Holy shit!

It's a baby, I think. There's a smaller one.

Yeah, mother and a calf.

Have you seen it before?

- First time ever. - First time ever now?

- Yes, that's why I'm so happy. - Wow! Wow!

- This is fun, yeah. - Yeah?

- You're enjoying it? - Yeah.

Yeah?

I can see that you have your shoulders down much more.

Oh!

Yeah.

Yeah.

Don't forget what I told you.

I will remember.

Turn around and do this, if you have the voice.

- Yeah. I can do it. - Kill it.

- I know you can. - Yeah.

- And we hear from you, yeah? - Yeah. Yes.

- Hmm? - Yeah.

You're welcome anytime.

- Come and visit, really. - Of course, I will. Yeah.

There's so much I want to tell,

and I don't know how to say it.

The old favorite, that one.

Hmm. Yeah.

Everyone says that

teenage years are supposed to be, like,

the best years of your life.

It's like everyone wants to be teenagers

except teenagers.

Being young is hard.

Sometimes I found being alive hard.

Some things that I experienced here,

I never thought I would, like...

experience so much so that I was like,

"Oh, if I knew this would happen,

I would not go. It will be too scary."

If that makes sense.

And then you're kind of grateful

that it happened.

I'm in a bit of a middle stage

where I'm neither a kid nor adult, if you will.

I see my flaws, I see my pros.

I don't think I'm a complete nuisance

to everybody now, which I thought I was before.

Maybe I was before, maybe I'm not now.

I'm learning about myself through other people.

I think that's what this year has been mainly about.

The world has become bigger for me, you know?

It's not that scary.

It's not easy being home.

Life is chaos.

I cannot change the past,

but I feel that I can do something with my life.

I need a challenge.

I think it's weird to get older.

And I think you should chase

the better version of yourself all the time.

That's life. You do big changes.