Original subtitles

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KINOMEKHANIKA Film Company

Hi.

- Can I help you? - I'm your neighbor.

I got out to meet a delivery guy, but my door shut.

May I use your phone to call the locksmith?

I'm not a maniac. That's exactly what a maniac would say.

I'm Kirill.

Lika.

- Lika Vershinina? - That's correct.

- You're Lika Vershinina? - Yes.

Lika Vershinina?

Lika! Don't you recognize me? I'm Kirill Rumyantsev.

I lived next door 13 years ago.

We had same caps and I teased you that you were wearing a boys' cap.

- And you had a girls' one! - Yes!

- Kirill! - Lika!

ANGELICA

Look what I've found.

Wow! It's our kindergarten matinee.

- I'm no wolf, but you're a true snowflake. - Come on, I looked more like a snowman.

- Give me a copy. - No way.

- You'll see it when you pay me visits. - OK.

- Found the locksmith's number? - Yes, but there's a problem.

My power of thought can't call him.

- Sure, here you go. - Thanks. Wow!

How many carats?

It's priceless. My boyfriend...

- Oops. Sorry. - What?

OK, I give you 10 more minutes.

It's not enough, there's force majeure.

I'll be one or two hours late. I'll call you when I'm through.

- Are you OK? - I'm fine. Bye, see you.

Same as before, you find excuses to stay with me.

I hope Nikita's as understanding as your granny.

What's that?

It's for home.

Not this home.

I want you to feel comfortable.

You think it's right to live with my parents?

I haven't unpacked all things, just in case.

I feel comfortable when you smile.

Instead of worrying about our conflict with them.

As soon as your parents let you live with me

I'll steal you right away, Princess.

I'll sleep on your shoulder tonight. I've been dreaming of it for three years.

- What did you do in New York? - A value fund hired me after the varsity.

I worked there 1, 2, 3... 4 days and quit.

My parents were mad, but I already was in Goa.

I was adapting websites, translating articles,

but it's a boring part. Between open-airs and diving,

I was driving my ex-colleagues in New-York mad.

- Go ahead. - One second.

- Nikita... - And Valerik!

I'm not good at naming elephants. You didn't call back, so here we are.

Thanks. Come in.

But I'm not alone.

It's Kirill. My neighbor and best friend from the sand pit.

His door closed, so we're waiting for a locksmith.

Kirill, this is... my Nikita.

Nikita Yemelyanov!

- Are you friends, too? - When I lived in Vietnam,

I often hung out in a Russian cafe, where they played Zed TV.

But mute, so I'm happy to finally hear you.

Really?

I guess it's time to show you my best trick.

-Disappearing Kirill. -Where are you going?

To the staircase. I think the locksmith will never be here.

So I'll live at the staircase. OK, I don't wanna bother you.

You're not.

You know what? Grab the sweater.

It's cold there. May I give him your sweater?

- Sure, it's cold there. - Yep.

A conventional Vietnamese wisdom says,

'When you're given a sweater, ask for a chair too.'

- Take it. - Thanks.

- I couldn't not help him. - I know. That's why I love you.

And for lasagna.

Same story every time. I'm tired of coming in here.

Sir, Zhenya's having an exam tomorrow. She's got to sleep well.

- Me too. I mean, I'll administer it. - Right, you've got to sleep well, too.

So cut the tutorial. Larisa made up the bed in the living room.

What?! We'll sleep here together.

I see no second bed here. Will you put him on the floor?

- It's not hospitable. - Why do you sleep with Mom then?

- I'm her husband. - And I'm his wife.

Civil one. Right?

Yes.

- We're a young family. - OK.

Sleep wherever you want. But keep the door open!

It's stuffy.

We can stand it.

When they called me fatso, Kirill fought for me.

And then

he ate a whole pack of butter to get fat. So that I felt less hurt.

It's good we didn't go to the movies. The Kirill stories are great.

One day, we mixed strawberry soap and soda, and...

Lika, give me some more.

No, I don't want it this way.

How can we stay in a warm space when my old friend is freezing out there?

It's wrong!

The sweater? May I give back it in an hour? I'll freeze to death with the chair on.

No way. Time to pay the fine drinking hot tea with us.

Lika, off I go.

- I got to read for the exam. - Are you sure?

I skipped many lectures because of airs.

I can't tell'em tomorrow that Nyusha and Zverev were dressed the same

at the Zed TV award.

- Bye. - Bye. - Bye.

Are you sure we should sleep together the first night?

But you wanted to show them we're serious.

Hey! What are you doing here?

'Daddy by the door.'

'Won't get on his last nerve. Good night!'

Hi, I'm Kirill, your neighbor and Lika's friend.

You must be Kristina?

So, you know I'm here, but you brought just one coffee?

Forgot Lika? I'll tell her that when you wake up.

- 'Wake up?' Her exam's at 9. - Mine too.

Your civil mother-in-law and I worried you'd be late for the exam.

- How did the young family sleep? - Well, thank you.

I thought you'd cook something yourself for Roman Alexeyevich.

Wives should cook for husbands. Even civil ones.

I'm gonna make an omelet.

To do this, you should've bought eggs and milk yesterday.

All wives do so.

Zhenya, why don't we take breakfast on the way?

Don't waste money for cafes.

- Now you've got to pay the bills here. - Cut it!

I only knew two cards, but they slipped my memory, too.

Kirill, you're great anyway. OK, got to go.

Or they'll take all best places in the classroom.

See you.

I wanna celebrate my comeback to Moscow tonight.

But I got only two numbers - yours and an Indian restaurant's.

Let's celebrate the exam by the way. We'll call Nikita, Kristina, Alex.

Alex is Kristina's boyfriend. He's a walking party.

OK, dinner's on me, but let's meet at yours.

Your windows look out to the East and fill the room with positive zen energy.

-My place is a mess. -OK.

Thanks.

Hi Vika.

- Hi. - Hi.

Vika? She can't pronounce the sound 'L?'

No, it's just that...

Vika Vershinina is my stage name.

I mean VV is better than LV.

- My exam! Thanks again. - Good luck.

Hi Nikita.

Kirill? I haven't recognized you dressed.

Lika and I are giving an old friends' party tonight.

New ones are invited, too. Drop by to her place.

I wanted to take her to the movies tonight.

You want, but I do.

It's gonna be fun. There'll be Kristina and her friend...

- Alex. - That's me.

Cool car. An original pussy wagon.

- I'm Alex. - Kirill. See you both tonight.

- Deal. - I'll be there.

Will you tell your childhood stories again? I'm the first in line.

Good morning. If I return the car an hour earlier,

will you give me some money back?

Congratulations. You've reached the middle of education.

Will you come to our mid-education party tomorrow?

You're on the guest list. Bordukovskaya +1.

You'll host the wet T-shirt contest. Will you be there?

I surely won't. Have a good time.

Don't catch cold in wet T-shirts.

I'll make dinner.

Been waiting for these words for 20 years. What will you cook?

- Pilaf. - The chef's personally picked ingredients.

So I'm sure it will be really good.

The chef's never made pilaf.

To make it, one shouldn't graduate from the Moscow Pilaf University.

- It's all in the web. - Sir, I wanted to fix a socket.

But I left my glasses at work. You're young and sharp-eyed.

- It broke 100 years ago. - Fix it as its anniversary gift.

- Will you help us, sir? - Sure.

- It's getting cold. - It's always cold here.

Wait.

I'm sorry. I overreacted about the motorcycle.

- Overreacted? You've burned it down. - I was emotional.

I thought I'd feel better, but I feel worse.

- This is my car keys. - I won't burn your car.

I'm at peace with my emotions.

I know, but my dad's away for a metal forum.

He left me his car with a driver. You can take mine.

How can I explain to my girlfriend that I drive another girl's car,

- and there's nothing between us? - You're right.

Lika won't believe the truth, but my offer is valid.

In case you change your mind.

First, pour the rice over the fried part.

Pour it a bit higher than the rice level.

Roma?

No worries. It's temporary electricity saving.

My understanding is the socket is dead.

Zhenya, need a carrot peeler? We've got a volunteer.

His will to work makes his sparkle.

Pilaf!

Damn, no web. Got to reboot the router.

Can't do without the Moscow Rice University.

Pilaf University. But I can do it.

Hi Nikita.

According to a Vietnamese tradition, a guest who's late should kiss

the hostess's hand as many times as many minutes he's late.

Once, I was 90 minutes late for my friend's granny's anniversary.

- And? - The granny was happy.

Then it turned out she'd made up the tradition.

The main feature of Vietnamese cuisine is sauce Nước mắm.

It's made from rotten fish.

I had no time to get it, so I used normal soy sauce. Enjoy your meal.

Once the Vietnamese rich man Sao Phang

ordered to cut down a tea plantation and build a luxurious palace on its place.

But peasants disobeyed him and went to the mountains.

Then, angry Sao

swung his sword at a tea bush, but was stung by a scorpion.

The rich man fell on the ground and, agonizing, applied a tea leaf

- to his wound. - Have you seen an announcement

of a new travel show on our channel? - Wait, Nikita. What happened to Tiao Sao?

Nothing. He died.

He should've sucked out the poison rather than apply leaves.

The conclusion is that tea doesn't work with scorpion bites.

I would've died, too.

Groovy music! I guess your neighbors often ask you to turn up the sound.

I know who inspires you.

No. All chicks of the planet.

As to her, we meet sometimes. I'm not sure I really need it.

A more decisive guy can come into play.

She's beautiful like Scarlett Johansson.

No, Lika, wait.

My party, my rules, my cleaning. Have fun.

I'll do it. The party's yours, the girl is mine. I'll do the cleaning.

In the meantime, I'll teach you the dance of Emperor's butterflies.

Later, OK? Nikita! Let he help you!

Unusual pilaf. Or is it casserole?

It's pilaf.

Then it's underboiled from this side and overboiled from this side.

Why don't we order pizza or sushi?

No, we'll eat pilaf.

It's your fault it turned out so. Why do what you can't, electrician?

Good point. Why make pilaf if you can't?

Good news is it's the 21st century. Without the Internet, we'd starve to death.

- You're acting like a child. - You're grumbling like an old man.

At least I'm brave enough to swallow my pride and admit I was wrong.

Swallow also pilaf with juice, and I'll grow up in the meantime.

You dance mockingly great.

Yeas of practice at Saratov's disco. I can fight well too.

I'll try not to tread on your feet then.

- And not to touch me under my back. - Heaven and hell.

- Meaning what? - I mean that...

You're different when you don't try to conquer Alex.

You're real, nice and unusual.

Is it so obvious I tack on him?

It's obvious you're trying hard.

But it should be vice versa. Be yourself, let Alex try hard.

Where do you spring from?

The next song is for a beautiful girl in a yellow blouse

that won't stay on her for long tonight.

Sweetheart, anyone ever told you that you're the dead spit of

Scarlett Johansson?

I'm sure they also tell Scarlett Johansson she's the dead copy of Kristina Kiselyova.

Can't wait to try the dessert?

Gave over. Grab the dessert and get the hell out of here.

What do you mean game over? We wanted to play Capybara.

- It's Vietnamese charades. - Let's better play hide and seek.

Hide at your place, but we'll seek for you here.

Don't harsh buzz. If you don't like it, I'll call you a taxi.

No worries, taxi's on me. I saw the ring you gave to Lika.

Screw you!

Stop it, guys! Nikita!

Easy.

Grab your crap and get the hell out of here!

- Cut it, Nikita! - Easy, guys.

I just fell and Nikita helped me get up.

- Get out of here! - Easy!

If you're in foully mood, it's not a reason to take out on my friends.

- Say you're sorry. - Sorry?!

- For not beating him up enough? - Enough!

Screw you all.

Nikita, don't go away. I have forgiven you already.

Ulyana.

We're going to Granny. And you...

- Why don't you go to a cafe? - I'm with you.

Got no company for a cafe. Let me get dressed.

We're going with Aunt Nina and Uncle Sergey.

No space in the car.

Next time.

- It has worked! - You're my strategist.

Your daddy's daughter.

Let's take our time and not do it at the fist opportunity.

Zhenya.

Each step of our relation is really important to me.

I don't wanna rush up the stairs.

But we've already reached the Romantic Dinner floor.

Off we go. Home is still the best.

- Vika! I won't sleep home tonight! - I got it! Bye!

Why don't you call him, after all?

He'll come back and you'll reconcile. I'll go home to wash up in the meantime.

I won't call him. It will look like it's my fault.

OK, I got to go. It's a long way through the whole staircase.

Bye.

Nikita is not your man.

Your only man is right next to you. You know him.