Original subtitles

(DOG BARKING)

♪ He was the shaggiest dog

♪ He was the shaggiest dog

♪ He was the spookiest dog I ever did see ♪

WILSON: Go on! Get out of here! Go on!

Get!

♪ I saw that dog upon a stair

♪ I looked again and he wasn't there

♪ I looked once more And what did I see?

♪ That great big shaggy dog A-grinnin' at me

♪ He was the shaggiest dog I ever met

♪ He was the shaggiest dog Oh, what a pet

♪ He was the spookiest dog I ever did see

♪ How do I know? Well give a listen to me

♪ He was the shaggiest dog

♪ He was the shaggiest dog

♪ He was the spookiest dog I ever did see

♪ How do I know? Well give a listen to me

♪ I'll catch that dog one happy day

♪ I'll tie him up I'll make him stay

♪ I'll make him fetch I'll make him heel

♪ I'm going to prove to all the world He's really real

♪ He's the shaggiest, waggiest Spookiest dog in town ♪

NARRATOR: This is a shaggy dog story.

It could have happened anywhere,

or to anyone.

It so happened that it happened to Wilson Daniels,

a man who loved people

but hated dogs.

Go on! Get out of here! Go on!

Get! Go on! Get out of here!

Morning, dear. Good morning, dear.

Blast.

Yes, dear?

It's ridiculous. Of all the sickly sentimentality.

Giving a medal to a dog.

Don't get the paper in the butter, dear.

Making a big hero out of him.

What did he do?

He dragged a baby from a burning building.

Now, who couldn't do that?

Now, don't upset yourself, Wilson.

Dogs.

Yapping and snapping at a man's heels.

Man's best friend. If I ever find the idiot who said that...

You must remember, sweet, that most people love dogs.

I suppose I'm some kind of a freak because I don't?

It's nothing to be ashamed of, dear.

Frankly, I think dogs don't like mailmen because,

well, because sometimes they bring bad news.

Animals sense those things, you know.

(SCOFFS)

Freeda?

I'm proud of the twenty years I spent in the mail service.

And neither snow nor rain, nor sleet, nor dogs

ever kept me from my appointed rounds.

But those blasted dogs tried.

You were very brave.

Where are the boys?

They had breakfast early.

They're down in the cellar tinkering with something.

What with this time? I'm not sure.

Is there something called an issile interceptor?

"Issile interceptor"?

Oh, you must mean missile interceptor.

Freeda, I've been thinking.

As long as you're not taking a firm hand with Wilby,

I've got to do something about it.

What do you mean, dear?

Well, for one thing, that mess he got us into last week.

Which mess was that?

The one where he had the police throw

new dean of the divinity school

into jail as a public enemy.

Oh, well,

that was because of the picture

on the bulletin board in the post office.

It did look a little like the new dean.

Now, what I propose to do about Wilby is...

Missile interceptor!

(LOUD BOOM)

(INDISTINCT)

Maybe you better switch it off, Wilby!

How can I switch it off? I haven't switched it on yet!

Maybe we better take it off the launching site.

Yeah, hurry!

Never mind, it's too late!

Get the upstairs area clear. And hurry up!

Pop, could you and Mom come on outside now?

And sort of hurry, please.

Well, save something!

Where's Wilby? He's still in the basement!

Come on, Wilby!

(LOUD EXPLOSION)

Well, I guess we've officially entered the rocket age, eh, Pop?

It'd be great to be up there riding it, wouldn't it, Pop?

I wish I was on it right now.

Wilson.

Pop sure was sore.

Yeah, I know.

I always seem to rub him the wrong way.

WILSON: Wilby!

Pop, how'd you get up here?

I piled up some boxes.

Now, Wilby, I'm sorry to have to say this to you,

but I want you to get rid of all that junk in the basement.

All, sir? All of it.

I want you to dismantle the workshop,

bury those chemicals,

and give away all those mechanical gadgets.

Yes, sir.

And I want you to lose, or give away, or do something

with all the mice, hamsters, bats, crickets, bugs, snails,

and heaven knows what other plagues

of mankind that lurk down there.

Yes, sir.

Now get down of this roof, both of you,

before you fall off the roof and ruin the flower beds.

Be careful, Pop. Those boxes look kind of rickety.

Thank you. I'll do all right, thank you.

Whoa!

(LOUD CRASH)

We better get down from here.

(TYRES SCREECHING)

(CAR HORN HONKING)

Hi, Allison!

Whoa!

(LAUGHS) That's old knothead for you, always showing off.

The flowers! That's just what Pop said not to do!

You all right, Wilby?

Sure, I'm fine.

Buzz, may I talk to you for a moment?

Excuse me.

Look, Wilby, I'm in a hurry.

What about my seven bucks?

Yeah. What about it? Cough it up.

Pop pulled the plug on my allowance.

Look, Wilby, I'm sorry, but you know how it is.

I've got a date with Allison.

I'm sick and tired of financing your romances.

I'd like to take Allison out myself.

You want a date with Allison?

And why not?

Wilby, have you ever taken a girl,

any girl, out on a date?

Well...

Not exactly.

And now, you want to move right in

on the most popular girl in town?

Buzz. Are we or are not going to play tennis?

Coming. Excuse me.

Hey, just a minute, Buzz.

Great sufferin' cats.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

What's she saying?

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

Freeda, what are you doing?

Just having a look at the new neighbours, dear.

They're moving into that gloomy, old Coverly mansion.

Well, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. Give me my glasses!

Who are they, anyway?

Well, he's the new assistant curator at the county museum.

A man by the name of Andrassy.

Dr Mikhail Andrassy.

All my reports aren't in yet,

but Murphy Jones who leased the place told me...

Freeda, I'd rather not know how you get your gossip,

but what else do you know about them?

Well, he's supposed to be a well-known art expert.

He spent some time in a prison camp after the war.

Reason unknown.

He worked in the famous, uh, Uffizi Museum in Florence, Italy.

There is a daughter, seventeen years old.

Been studying art in Paris.

How dare they bring a camel into this neighbourhood?

No!

It's a dog!

A blasted, dratted dog!

That is correct.

One Bratislavian sheepdog.

Supposed to be a very rare breed.

I'll have to move to the back bedroom.

Now don't start falling apart, Wilson.

You know very well that dog thing is all in your mind.

All in my mind?

I itch, my sinuses are ballooning up,

my throat is constricting so I can hardly breathe.

Those old Pekingese wounds on my ankle

are throbbing like bongo drums,

and you say it's all in my mind.

Well, if you say so, okay.

Come along, Wilson. Why don't you

just lie down and rest for a while?

(DOG BARKING)

Hey, wait a minute. What about my seven bucks?

(DOG BARKING)

What do you know? I think he likes me.

That's his problem.

I'm more interested in the little mademoiselle who owns him.

Hey, you shouldn't be running across the street like that, dog.

Liable to be hurt.

By golly, you're right Wilby.

I'll bet she's worried about him.

I better take him back. Come on, pooch.

Now, wait just a minute, Buzz. This dog came to me.

All right, come on along.

Maybe old Buzz could teach you something.

ALLISON: Well, all the nerve!

Yes? We brought back your dog.

The mademoiselle's dog.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

Um.

Me...

Bring...

Dog... You.

Him. Me.

We do this.

What is it, Franceska?

Chiffon ran away.

These two nice Indian boys brought him back.

Indians? This far East?

Oh, we not... I mean, we're not Indian.

I didn't know you spoke English.

But of course.

My daughter speaks seven languages.

How many do you speak?

My name is Franceska. This is my father, Dr Andrassy.

How do you do, gentlemen? Bring that over here, please.

I'm Buzz Miller. This is Wilby Daniels.

He lives down the street.

Then we're neighbours!

Won't you come in?

I'm afraid you'll have to excuse the house.

We're just moving in, you know.

(WHISTLES) Boy, look at all the stuff!

Some of it is stuff. But some of it is rather priceless.

Look, here's a Titiano,

a Tintoretto,

a Rodin and a Vecchini.

This is a very fine piece.

A Forzini, early sixteenth century.

Probably worth three or four thousand dollars.

FRANCESKA: I believe there's an

El Greco over there in the music room.

That's another Tintoretto.

Perhaps I better put it over here, out of the way.

Well, look at that!

I've never seen Chiffon take such a fancy to anyone.

He sure is friendly.

Who's she?

Lucrezia Borgias.

Well, you remember the Borgias, of course?

Oh, sure.

Who?

The Borgias were notorious during the Dark Ages in Italy.

Some people say the Borgias dabbled in black magic.

Black magic?

Hey.

That dog in the picture, isn't he the same kind as this one?

Yes, a Bratislavian sheep dog.

The breed has mostly died out now.

Chiffon is one of the few left.

It's very lonely for him.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

Excuse me, Franceska.

Would you be good enough to take the Orsini artefacts

to Dr Howard at the museum? He's waiting for them.

Certainly, father.

Say, why don't I drive you down there? My car's right outside.

Oh, wait! We'll both take you.

All right, I'll get my purse.

Hey, what's the big idea? I thought my driving made you nervous?

Look, the only thing about you that makes me nervous

is my seven dollars, if you know what I mean.

All right, Wilby. If you want to come along,

glad to have you.

Thank you.

What a sweet little museum!

Oh, yeah. It's not bad.

I put in quite a bit of time around this place,

studying the arts.

Then how come you got lost getting here?

Say, that's not a bad-looking deal.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

Personally, I go in for the old Egyptian stuff. Like that.

That figures.

Franceska.

Buzz?

Buzz?

Buzz?

Buzz!

(CACKLING)

(LAUGHING)

You scared me, Professor.

So you ought to be. Serves you right.

You shouldn't be wandering around

here 'till the exhibit is open.

I've worked day and night to get it ready.

I'm sorry, Professor Plumcutt. I was looking for some friends of mine.

You know me?

Why, of course! It's Wilby Daniels, isn't it?

Yes, sir. I used to deliver your paper.

That's right, so you did.

Or did you? Come to think of it,

I don't recall getting my papers lately.

No, sir. I gave up my route two years ago.

Oh. Well, that just goes to show how often I read a newspaper.

Nothing interesting happens to people these days.

Now, in the delightfully evil days of the Borgias, here,

something interesting happened to people every day.

Yes, sir. I guess they did, sir. I'd better...

Wilby, do you realise that this

civilisation knew all about sorcery?

Even about shapeshifting and the casting of spells.

What's shapeshifting?

Shapeshifting was the medieval art

of borrowing somebody else's body

to live in for a while.

A most interesting practise.

You've heard all about people being changed into cats, dogs,

and other creatures, haven't you?

Professor, you don't believe in this stuff, do you?

Well, it may surprise you to hear, my boy, but I do.

I know people laugh about these things

today, but if they were honest,

they'd admit that there are moments on dark and lonely nights

when something stirs within us

and reawakens ancient fears and beliefs.

Well, I'd better be going now. I have to find my friends.

Yes, come in and see me again... Look out!

Sorry.

No, no, it's all right.

Look, Wilby, run along, will you? I'll take care of these.

You're sure it's all right, aren't you?

Yes, please.

Well, they say it takes all kinds.

Then it's a date? It's a date.

Good deal.

I wonder what happened to Wilby.

Don't worry about knothead, he loves museums.

Bye now. Au revoir!

Hi, Wilby!

Who gets the mice and the hamsters?

Pete Hammers. He always wanted them.

Mickey Warren gave me a buck for your chemistry stuff.

I promised to throw in Harry the bat for free.

What about old Zachary here?

I couldn't unload him. Nobody wanted him.

Poor old Zack. I know just how you feel.

Come on, Wilby! Quit feeling sorry

for yourself. Pop'll get over it.

Yeah, Pop'll get over it, but I won't.

I'll still be the same mixed up guy I've always been.

All right, boys. Time for bed. .

If you haven't finished that, be sure and finish it tomorrow.

Be right up, Pop.

You coming, Wilby?

In a minute.

What the heck is this?

Now how do you suppose...

I know. It must have fallen in when

I knocked over the Professor's case.

"In canis corpore, transmuto."

Sounds like Latin. Wish I knew more than just first year Latin.

Canis, canis... That's dog.

Dog. Into dog... Something.. .

transmuto.

"In canis corpore, transmuto."

"In canis corpore, transmuto."

It's transmuto and away we go with a do-si-do.

Wait a minute! What's going on here?

Stop! Now wait, somebody, whoever you are.

I was just kidding!

WILSON: Wilby! Wilby, come on, now. It's getting late.

No! No!

No! No!

WILSON: Wilby? Wilby?

WILBY: Yipe!

(GROANS)

Wilby? Come on up, now, it's getting late.

Okay, Pop.

You catching a cold?

Your mother told you to wear a sweater down there.

Sweater? I've got a sweater.

Well, come on up, now.

Poor Pop. This'll kill him.

What'll I do? Gosh, what'll I do?

Professor Plumcutt! He'll know!

Now, to get by Pop.

(GRUNTS)

(HUMMING)

(GRUNTS)

Professor Plumcutt?

Hello, fella.

I've got to talk to you.

You know dogs aren't allowed in here.

I'm not a dog. I'm Wilby Daniels.

Wilby Daniels? Are you really?

Well, well. I'm not surprised. The very first time I ever saw you

I said to myself, "That boy is a potential shapeshifter."

Is that what happened to me?

Of course.

How on earth did you manage it?

I think this ring had something to do with it.

The Borgia ring! Where did you find it? I've looked everywhere for it.

Well, it fell in the cuff of my trousers.

Thank you very much for returning it.

It's a very rare and unusual ring.

Professor!

What's the matter? What about me?

What about you?

I don't want to be a dog!

You don't?

No, of course not! Can't you help me?

How?

Apparently you've become involved with

some old spell cast upon this ring.

Probably by one of the Borgias. Sounds just like them.

But how do I get out of It?

Good heavens, don't ask me, my boy, how should I know?

There are all kinds of spells.

Some of them break themselves after a while,

while others come and go like a headache.

Come and go?

Yes. Sometimes you'll be a dog, and sometimes you'll be a boy.

For hours at a time, sometimes longer.

You never can tell. That's what makes it so interesting.

Well, how can I break the spell?

An act of heroism might break the spell.

Heroism?

Why, of course, why didn't I think of it first?

Heroism has always been an important,

a most potent factor in the breaking of spells.

Do you remember The Hound of Florence?

WILBY: Hound of Florence? No, sir.

Well, it's the famous story of a young

man who was changed into a dog,

just as you have been.

He was in love with a beautiful girl,

and one night got into a fight, defending

her from the attentions of an evil duke.

The duke grabbed a dagger and plunged it into the dog!

The dog fell to the ground, and then,

as the poor little animal lay there

with a dagger deep in his heart,

he changed back into a man again!

Dagger in the heart?

Yes.

That'd kill me!

No, no, you don't grasp the point of the story!

What I was trying to say is that

it is possible to break such a spell.

Now, you must excuse me, please. I have work to do.

Isn't there anything I can do?

Yes. Be happy, and keep a stiff upper lip.

Thanks.

You're welcome.

(SIGHS)

POLICE RADIO: 1-0-2-9 code 6-1-A-7-9.

1-2-4-9, roger. Al units on one, stand by.

Sorry.

That's all right.

What'd you say?

Hmm? I said I'm sorry.

That's what I thought you said.

Kelly?

Yeah. What's the matter with you?

You see a dog just then?

Yeah, Why?

Did you hear...

Hear what?

Forget it.

Forget it, I said. Forget it!

All right then, I'll forget it!

(GARGLING)

(TOILET FLUSHING)

(GRUNTS)

(SIGHS)

(HUMMING)

Wilby! Moochie! Time to get up!

Be right with you, Pop.

Hey, Wilby, I had the funniest dream last night.

I dreamed that you were a dog.

Come on, Wilby, wake up!

It was the greatest dream!

You came in this room as a big, old shaggy dog.

Hey, Wilby, wake up!

Oh, boy! How'd you get in here?

What do you mean, how'd I get here? I live here.

You talk just like Wilby!

I am Wilby!

No, you're a dog! Where you going?

Dog?

It can't be true. No!

Do you think Pop'll let me keep you, Wilby?

Just shut up a minute, will you? Let me think.

I'll be good to you, honest I will.

Boy, we'll have great times together.

"Great times together"? What are you talking about?

Uh-oh.

WILBY: What's the matter?

I hope Pop won't shoot you!

Huh?

You know he swore the first time

he caught a dog in this house, he'd...

WILSON: You two better be out of bed when I open that door.

Yipe, here he comes!

Hurry, get under there! Come on!

All right, come on, you birds.

Good morning, Pop!

Good morning, Moochie.

How are you this morning?

I'm very fine, thank you.

Wilby?

Pop, listen to this!

Very nice. Now, stop playing it and get dressed.

But, Pop! I just learned it!

Very good. Now, get dressed like I told you.

Wilby, I want you out of that bed right now.

And you, brush your teeth.

That was a close one.

Don't worry, boy!

Gosh, why did this have to happen to me?

It's just terrific, Wilby! How'd it happen?

I don't know, exactly.

Remember, we were down in the basement last night...

Uh-huh.

Morning, dear. Morning, dear.

Freeda, have you seen any dogs around here?

Of course not. They wouldn't dare.

Are my eyes getting puffy?

Well, you've always had puffy eyes, dear.

I know that.

But they just feel like they're getting puffier.

Freeda, if I thought for a moment...

Freeda, I hope I can trust you.

What do you mean?

You're always telling me how much Moochie wants a dog, and...

Yes?

Well, I know you two wouldn't gang up on me, but...

Well, sometimes I get the feeling that

you're not in sympathy with my problem.

Wilson, I think you'd better eat your eggs.

Did Professor Plumcutt say you had to stay a dog all the time?

He didn't exactly know.

Gee, I hope so.

You what?

Gosh, Wilby, you know how much I always wanted to have a dog.

Well, I'm not going to be your dog.

I'll teach you all kinds of tricks.

How to sit up, beg, roll over, and all that stuff.

Cut it out, will you?

WILSON: Boys!

You stay here, I'll tell him you're not hungry.

Hungry? I'm starved!

You like bones? Nice, meaty bones?

You know what I like. Hurry!

Don't worry, boy. I'm going to take good care of you.

"Take care" of me. Hmph!

Psst!

Pop, what's this ad?

Well, it's a sale on lawnmowers.

Interesting, isn't it?

Yes.

(GASPS)

How did you get in here? Shoo! Shoo!

Go home! Go home!

Don't you know it isn't safe for a dog in this house?

Now go home! Shoo! WILSON: My toast!

Toast, coming up!

Shoo!

Freeda. Yes?

Is there a dog in the kitchen?

FREEDA: A dog?

WILSON: Yes, dog. D-O-G.

Dog.

What kind of dog?

That's all I wanted to know.

MOOCHIE: Pop! Where you goin'?

To the hall closet. What for?

To get my shotgun.

You can't shoot your own...

My own what?

Your own... Your own neighbour's dog!

Oh, can't I?

MOOCHIE: Pop! You can't do that!

WILBY: Oh!

Oh...

(PANTING)

That's right. Run, you cowardly flea bag!

WILSON: Next time you come on my property, I'll...

I'll... Well, I just will!

(SNIFFING)

(SIZZLING)

I just don't understand it.

He's never stayed out all night before.

I am sure, Mademoiselle, he will return for his meals.

Well, if you'd watch him a little more carefully,

these things wouldn't happen!

(WILBY BARKING)

STEFANO: I'm sorry, Mademoiselle.

There you are! Where have you been all night, you wretched beast?

Chiffon! Get down from there.

Chiffon, mon petit! I've been so worried about you!

You've been out for too long.

Now you're all forgiven!

Come on, how about some breakfast?

Well, since when do you eat at the table?

I'll get you some breakfast. Come on!

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Stefano, the door.

Yes?

Dr Andrassy is expecting me.

My name is Thurm.

Yes, Mr Thurm. Come in.

Please follow me.

What's the matter? I thought you were hungry.

Well, go on!

(CRUNCHING)

Oh, no you don't!

You get back in the kitchen. (SPEAKING FRENCH)

Stefano. Mademoiselle?

Take Chiffon and see that he doesn't run away again.

Do you understand?

Oui, Mademoiselle.

You are always causing me trouble, aren't you?

Get in there! I don't have time to watch you every minute.

(RATTLING)

Now let's see you get out of there!

(SIGHS)

It's me!

It's me!

(BARKING)

(CHIFFON WHIMPERING)

(LOUD CRASH)

MOOCHIE: Here, Wilby! (WHISTLING)

Wilby! Here, Wilby!

Wilby!

Here, boy! (WHISTLING)

Here, Wilby!

Wilby! Here, boy!

Here, Wilby!

Here, boy! Here, Wilby!

Wilby?

What do you think you're doing?

Aw, gee!

What's the matter?

You're not a dog any more.

You were gonna put this dog collar on me, weren't you?

Well, you don't have to get sore about it!

Well, forget it, will you? I'm through with that dog business.

You sure?

No.

Where's Pop?

He's in there, cleaning his gun.

Well, I guess I'll have to hide these for a while.

Did you wash your hands? Yup.

Wilson, if you don't mind, we'll have

dinner a little early tomorrow night.

We're all going to the country club dance, you know.

Is my good suit clean?

I had it done last week.

Wilby, why don't you take a girl to the dance?

WILSON: Wilby?

He's a little young for dating, isn't he?

Nonsense!

Just because you didn't go out with girls until you were 23...

Well, that's not true! I was 20.

Besides, I was shy.

Well, anyway, Wilby can't exist in a vacuum.

Besides, you've already taken all his hobbies away from him.

Well, I'd say it's a big jump from birds' eggs to girls!

There is nothing wrong with girls.

They're character-building.

Wilby, why don't you ask Allison to the dance?

Allison? Well, Buzz takes her to all the dances.

Oh. Well, then someone else.

There must be dozens of lovely girls

who'd be delighted to go with you.

Why does he have to take a girl? Why can't he go with me?

Oh, that's a great idea, that is!

Honey, why don't you take that new girl down the street?

Dr Andrassy's daughter?

Franceska?

No, I wouldn't have a chance with her.

(KNOCKING ON THE DOOR)

Go see who that is, will you, Wilby?

(KNOCKS)

Uh, Wilby, can I talk to you in private for a second?

You know, knothead, uh, Wilby, you're the best friend I have.

Uh-uh, Buzz. Not a cent.

Oh, now, Wilby, I don't come to see you just when I need money.

All right, I'm sorry.

The point is, I do have a problem.

I'm supposed to take Allison to the country club dance.

I know.

Well, I happened to mention the dance to Franceska...

You know how it is.

She's a smooth worker.

Before I knew it, I asked her to go, too.

Well, what do you want me to do?

All you have to do is come along and make a foursome out of it.

You don't have to be with anybody.

I don't get you.

Don't you see? I'll handle it so that both girls think they're with me.

Then everybody's happy.

Well, I don't see how that makes me happy.

Well, sure you do.

It's fun. We're playing a harmless little joke on the girls.

Well, what do you say?

Anything's better than going with my little brother.

(BUZZ LAUGHS)

I just don't see how it's going to work.

Well you just come along and watch the old master at work.

Huh, buddy-pal?

Oh!

Uh, say, I'll need gas for tomorrow night.

You don't happen to have a buck on you, do you?

How nice you look, Wilby!

Thank you. So do you.

Thank you.

(ENGINE STARTING)

(TYRES SQUEALING)

Don't bother getting out, Wilby, I'll get your date for you.

Imagine, taking the prettiest girl in town to the dance!

Oh! Oh, well... You know.

Franceska certainly seems to find you attractive.

You really think so?

Of course, I'm not as sophisticated as she is,

but there is something about you, lately.

Something unusual.

(DOOR OPENING)

You girls know one another.

ALLISON: Of course.

Hello, Wilby. Hi, Franceska.

I think you both better ride up in front with me.

The wind in the back is murder on the hair.

You're so thoughtful, Buzz.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

Sorry, I don't speak French.

Oh.

(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING)

Allison, will you do something for me?

What is it?

Well, you know, this is Wilby's

first dress-up date and he's scared stiff.

Scared of what?

Franceska!

Well, that's silly. She's his date, isn't she?

Well, sure, but you know how shy he is.

Franceska's kind of spectacular.

Well, it's got him tied up in knots.

So?

Well, I thought if you could dance the first dance with him.

You're old friends. It might break the ice for him.

Since when are you so concerned about Wilby?

Well, I like to see everyone happy.

Thanks, Allison. You're a real doll.

Wilby, aren't you and Allison going to have the first dance?

Well, sure. How about it, Allison? Want to dance?

Love to.

Shall we? Mais oui!

They're sweet together, aren't they?

Yeah. That's what makes it so tough.

What does?

Well, Wilby's got a tremendous crush on Allison.

Trouble is, he's so shy.

Allison goes more for the sophisticated type.

She can't see Wilby for sour apples.

He is very nice, isn't he?

Don't you worry. There's nothing you can do about it.

Buzz,

I have a rather amusing idea.

What's that?

Suppose I make a little fuss over Wilby

and pretend to be interested in him.

What, you mean make Allison jealous?

Oh, just a little bit.

Well, you're a genius.

I never would have thought of that in a million years!

The next number will be a ladies' tag dance.

Tag dance. Pardon?

It's customary.

The custom, is it not?

What's the big idea?

You told me to break the ice, didn't you?

Yeah, fine. Break it, don't melt it!

Excuse me.

You know, it's amazing.

All those pretty girls, they actually seem to enjoy dancing with Wilby!

And why not?

Well, I'd have bet anything he was going

to be the all-American wallflower.

There are a lot of things about your son that you don't know.

The next number is a Paul Revere.

(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)

Shall we, dear? Love to.

Excuse us, would you?

Oh, no more cake, sweetheart.

(LIVELY MUSIC PLAYING)

Wilby!

Wilby!

(SHOUTING) Wilby!

What's the big idea?

Get down!

Now, don't give me trouble, Mooch!

You've got trouble. Look at yourself!

Oh, no, no! Not here, not now, please!

Wilby, are you all right?

Oh, boy! You're a dog again!

What are you so happy about?

Gosh, Wilby, you know you're a lot more fun as a dog than you are as...

Ah, shut up! Get me out of here!

Okay, boy. I don't want anything to happen to you now.

Come on, sneak out that way!

Chiffon!

What in the world is he doing here!

Who? Chiffon.

Chiffon!

Get him, Buzz!

Oh, yeah!

(SCREAMS)

(ALL SCREAMING)

There's that blasted dog again.

Get away! What's he doing here?

See you later, boy.

BUZZ: Look out!

Come here, you mangy mutt!

Come here!

(GRUNTING)

Come on, Moochie. Time for bed, dear.

(TELEPHONE RINGING)

Hello?

Wilby, where are you?

Pop! Just a minute.

Well, it's a little late. Isn't it about time you were getting home?

Pop, is he all right?

Do you want me... Yes, he's all right.

Well, we wondered what happened to you.

I suppose you went chasing after that girl's dog, too?

Is it alright if you stay at Buzz's house tonight?

It's all right, Pop!

Yes, it's all right, Wilby.

Hey, Kelly. You got a dime for the phone?

Whoops! Sorry, Officer Hanson!

Bye!

(CHANGE CLINKING)

Kelly, here's your dime. Can we go now, please?

I thought you gotta call home.

Changed my mind. Let's go.

But you said it was important.

I know what I said. It was a whim.

Sometimes I'm just full of little whims.

Can we go now, please?

But you said...

Forget what I said! Forget it!

All right, I'll forget it.

Don't bother, Buzz.

Goodnight, Franceska. I hope you find your dog.

Thank you, Allison.

Goodnight. Goodnight.

(SQUEALING TYRES)

In the words of your charming other date, don't bother!

Oh, wait! Franceska, I can explain everything!

Goodnight!

Well, that's gratitude for you.

I beg your pardon?

Well, here I almost break my neck

trying to catch that dog of yours,

he drags me all over a parking lot,

and now you won't even listen to me.

So?

And besides that, I've got a very deep cut over my eye,

and it'll probably by infected by the time I get home.

Oh, well, I guess I don't blame you.

Come on inside. I'll clean your scratch.

Now you're talking!

Mmm.

What the...

[L](GRUNTING)

[L]What a night.

Is Chiffon here?

Yes, Mademoiselle, he just came home. He's in the kitchen.

I'm really quite displeased with you, Stefano.

I distinctly asked you to keep Chiffon locked up tonight.

STEFANO: Mademoiselle, I did my best.

I left him in the kitchen, carefully locked the door.

Still he escaped.

FRANCESKA: Very well. We won't discuss it now.

Please go in the sitting room, I want to see if Chiffon is alright.

BUZZ: Will you forget about that mutt for once?

Like I said, it was all Wilby's fault that I got into this mess.

FRANCESKA: Wilby's?

BUZZ: Yes, it's all his fault.

Because I have a soft heart, I was trying to do him a favour.

Ouch, that stings!

There, it's all done now.

Wilby didn't have enough nerve to get himself a date,

so he cooked up this whole thing.

Why are you blaming this all on Wilby?

Oh, don't let him fool you! He's not as dumb as he looks.

And behind that simple face, well...

I don't want to talk about my best friend like that.

Let's talk about us.

You know, Franceska, I've never met a girl like you.

No, I'm not kidding.

There's something about you that...

(BARKING)

Chiffon, there you are! What a bad dog you've been, mon cheri!

Running away again and scaring poor Franceska half to death!

Bad boy!

(PANTING)

I sure hate to see you waste all that on a mutt.

Why?

What do you mean?

I mean, forget about tonight.

Forget Wilby and the whole mess.

Like I said before, let's talk about us.

You know, Franceska, the first time I saw you,

I said to myself, I said, "Buzz, there's just the girl for..."

(GROWLING)

Does he have to keep looking at me like that?

Look, fella, I've had just about enough trouble for one night.

Now beat it!

(BARKING AND GROWLING)

(WHIMPERING)

Would you get lost?

Buzz!

(GROWLING)

Hey! What's the big idea?

Get off, will you?

Franceska! Chiffon, stop it!

He's flipped his lid!

Let go!

(YELLING IN FRENCH)

BUZZ: Get him off!

What has gotten into you? Now, stop it this instant!

I think you'd better leave, Buzz.

Okay. I'm beginning to get the point. Your dog doesn't like me.

I'm sorry.

Oh, that's okay. I can find my own way out.

FRANCESKA: Bad dog, you!

Good night.

Good night.

You behaved very badly tonight, Chiffon.

Buzz is really a nice boy.

A little, shall we say, conceited? Come on.

Yes?

I just wanted to say goodnight, Father.

Did you have a pleasant time, dear?

Yes, thank you.

But the odd thing was I found Chiffon at the dance.

Chiffon was there?

I don't understand how he keeps getting out of the house.

May I leave him with you tonight?

Certainly, dear. I'm sure he won't get away from me.

(DOORBELL RINGING)

Good night, Franceska. Good night.

Now, you behave yourself.

(LAUGHING) You stupid, wonderful dog!

(KISSES)

Thurm.

What is the meaning of this? You were

asked not to come here at night.

It's most urgent, Doctor, I dared not use the phone.

Is anything wrong at the missile plant?

On the contrary, good news. I've been transferred to Section 32.

ANDRASSY: Section 32, excellent!

With what I've already given you, this should be all you need.

How soon can you get it here?

Taking all necessary precautions,

I'd say tomorrow night, by 8:00.

That means that the complete mechanism

of the undersea hydrogen missile will be in our hands.

THURM: Yes, sir. ANDRASSY: Now, we must

get it out of the country.

Immediately.

Oh, no you don't. No, you don't, my friend!

You're not getting out of this house tonight!

All right. Up on the couch! Up!

(CHUCKLES)

Good night, Thurm.

I'll expect you tomorrow night at 8:00.

I certainly would like to know what has gotten into you, lately.

Spies!

I've got to tell somebody.

I've got to get out of here.

The laundry chute.

(ECHOING) Well, here goes!

(GRUNTS)

Easy, easy...

(GRUNTING)

(PANTING)

Whoa!

What'll I do now?

Hi, Pop. Hi, Son.

Wilby home yet? No, sir.

WILSON: Now, what's this you're reading?

"How to Train Your Dog"!

Gosh, Pop, I thought someday you might change your mind about dogs.

Let me tell you something, young man.

As long as I've got a mind, there will never be a dog in this house!

"How to Train"...

(DOOR SLAMMING)

(GRUNTING)

There.

(CRASHING)

Hey, Mooch!

Is that you, Wilby?

Well, now, who'd you think it was?

Gosh, boy, I've been worried about you!

Will you stop patting me? I don't like it.

Where you been?

Look, Mooch, you've got to get some help, and fast!

That house is full of spies!

Spies? Oh, swell! That'll be fun playing!

This isn't a game, it's serious!

Aw, Wilby...

WILBY: Listen. They're stealing

something from the missile plant.

The missile plant?

I don't know what it is exactly,

but they call it "Section 32."

They're sending it out of the country tonight.

Wow! I better tell Pop.

Pop?

Sure! He'll know what to do.

Now you just stay out of sight.

Okay.

Pop, Pop, can I talk to you for a minute?

Certainly, Moochie. What is it?

Will you please put down that paper? It's very urgent.

All right.

I just found out something.

What did you find out?

You know those people down the street, Dr Andrassy and them?

Yeah.

They're spies.

Spies, huh? Wow.

Pop, I'm not kidding.

They're stealing something from the missile plant.

Something called Section 32.

"Section 32"? That's very interesting.

But Pop, you gotta believe me!

We've got to do something about it.

Moochie, I'm surprised at you.

I knew I had one woolly-headed son in the family, but I...

Wilby's isn't woolly-headed. He's the one that heard them talking!

Oh, he's the one that heard it. That explains the whole thing.

Run along now, huh, Moochie?

But Pop, we can't just let them get away.

Moochie, run along.

Pop...

Moochie.

Hey.

No soap.

Hmm. I guess I'll have to give him the shock treatment.

Poor Pop.

Uh, where's the gun?

In the hall closet. I got the key.

Well, here goes.

Pop?

Yes, Wilby?

I got something to tell you.

But I'm afraid.

Well, you never have to be afraid to talk to me, Wilby.

Maybe sometimes I'm a little impatient with you,

but that's because you're my son,

I want you to be something special.

Yes, sir.

You just tell me what's troubling you.

I'm sure it can't be anything too serious.

Whatever it is, I promise you I'll understand.

Really, Pop?

You can bank on it, Wilby.

Shake on it?

Certainly, I'll shake on it, Wilby.

No!

Oh, that did it.

WILSON: Freeda!

Wilson? Freeda!

Wilson, is that you?

What are we going to do now?

We've got to get help.

Look!

WILBY: The police!

(CHATTER OVER POLICE RADIO)

I'd like to report some spies, please.

All right, what's the name?

Moochie... Montgomery Daniels.

Daniels?

You got any relation to that kid

who tipped us off about that gangster last week?

Yes, sir.

Wilby's my brother.

But he didn't know it was the new dean at the divinity college.

Remember, Kelly?

Last week, when I used to be a Sergeant.

No kidding, officer. We need help.

Who are you?

Uh... Wilby Daniels.

Wilby Daniels.

I knew it.

I knew it. First time that dog spoke to me.

I said to my wife...

Easy now, Hanson, it's all right.

It's probably some kid dressed up in a dog suit or something.

That's right, officer.

Sure! That's how he spied on the spies.

All right.

Take off the dog suit.

I can't! I... I don't have anything on underneath.

You see, Kelly? He can't.

You ought to know that.

All right, you two. Now that's enough!

You stop bothering Officer Hanson

before we take you down to the stations.

Fine. Let's go.

Yeah, let's go.

No, you don't. Not in this car.

But the spies!

Now, I'm afraid they're gonna have to keep.

You see, there's a landing of invaders

from Mars over by the stockyards.

I'm afraid we're going to have to get over there.

(ENGINE STARTING)

(CLOCK CHIMING)

Gosh, Wilby. Two o'clock!

We've got to think of something.

Yeah.

I've got it!

Here you are, you miserable beast!

You can't take him! He's my...

Your what?

My... My pal.

This is the last time you ever get away, I can promise you that.

Come on, you devil. Come along before I...

Come on!

No. No.

Wilson. Wilson?

Now, don't you dare move. I'll get the spirits of ammonia.

(MUMBLING)

Pop! Snap out of it! We gotta get moving.

No, Moochie.

Moochie! Is it true about Wilby?

Did I see and hear what I thought I saw?

You sure did. Wilby's a dog now.

No!

My own boy. My own flesh and blood.

Somehow, some way, I've failed him as a father.

How did it happen, Moochie?

I'll tell you later! Hurry!

Are we going somewhere?

Don't you understand? We gotta get help!

We gotta stop those spies!

What spies?

Remember? I told you about them.

Spies! That's right, you did!

Now don't you worry about a thing, Son.

I'm in this with you all the way.

Now, come on. We have to get some help.

Not that way, this way.

Wilson Daniels! You close that door this minute.

You're not stepping a foot from this house.

Freeda, you stay out of this. This is a job that calls for cool heads.

Come on, Moochie. Oh, here, this way.

Calm down, Mr Daniels. I just want to get this thing straight.

Oh.

Now, you say this information came from your son?

Yes, my older son. He was right there and he heard them talking.

And they knew he was there?

Oh, I'm sure they knew he was there, all right. But...

Doesn't that strike you as rather odd, Mr Daniels,

that they would speak of such confidential matters in front of your son?

Oh, no. It's not odd at all.

They probably didn't pay any attention to him.

You see, my son happens to be a dog.

Your son is a dog?

Yes. Now, don't get me wrong. He's not a dog all the time.

Just part of the time.

(CHUCKLES) Oh, I see.

Well, thank you for coming, Mr Daniels. We'll look into the matter.

Now wait a minute, don't you believe me? Ouch!

I'm sorry.

It's all right, I just don't happen to have my shoes on.

Don't you believe me?

Of course, of course.

Then aren't you going to do something about it now?

Well, we must proceed with caution, Mr Daniels,

Dr Andrassy is a well-respected man.

But you haven't got time for caution!

Don't you understand that this thing they stole, whatever it is,

is being shipped out of the country tonight?

I don't suppose you have any idea

precisely what this object may be.

No, I don't know "precisely."

All I know is that it's something called

Section 32 or something like that.

Section 32?

That's right.

Are you sure?

That's what the dog said.

Er, my son.

Please sit down again, Mr Daniels.

I should think so.

Now, you still insist a dog told you about this?

Yes. Well, why don't you ask my younger son, Moochie.

He's the dog's brother.

Just now, it's you I'm interested in, Mr Daniels.

Me? You don't think I have anything to do with all this.

Now you listen to me. I came here in good faith.

I told you a simple, straightforward story.

And just because I happen to have a son who's a dog,

you look at me as though I...

You look at me as though I have wheels in my head or something.

Just you remember I'm a government man myself.

We have the utmost respect for the members

of the U.S. Post Office Department, Mr Daniels.

Just now, I wonder if you would mind

repeating your story to one of my colleagues?

I'd be glad to.

Now all I ask is that you gentlemen keep an open mind.

You see... No, no.

Not them, Mr Daniels. Would you step into the hall, please?

Well... Yes.

Excuse me.

It's fantastic, but he knows about Section 32.

How could he?

That's what I've got to find out.

Meantime, check every man, every sketch,

every piece of equipment in that department.

That'll take time.

Get moving!

All right, Mr Daniels. This way, please.

I think you'll like Dr Galvin.

Doctor?

Oh, It's kind of an honorary title.

Well, now, just a minute here.

I've just returned from the museum.

I have our plan worked out.

Come upstairs, I'll go over it with you.

Yes, sir.

Is my daughter home?

No sir, not yet, she went shopping.

Good.

DR ANDRASSY: The girl must know

absolutely nothing of what's happening.

STEFANO: I understand, sir.

DR ANDRASSY: As it is, with matters coming to a head,

I don't quite know what to do about her.

STEFANO: How unfortunate Mademoiselle

happens to be your daughter.

Otherwise, the solution would be quite obvious.

DR ANDRASSY: In any case, Stefano, the problem is mine.

I'll decide what to do when the time comes.

This is a sketch of the packing case containing the small fossils.

Understand me clearly.

From here on, the slightest hitch will be disastrous.

You can depend on me, doctor.

DR ANDRASSY: When Thurm arrives

with the components of Section 32,

take them to my office at the museum.

There you will find the packing case

containing the Etruscan fossils.

Suppose the authorities open the case?

They may. But I doubt they will tamper very much

with such a fragile and priceless collection,

dispatched to such a distinguished man.

The packing case is to be shipped on the midnight plane,

consigned ostensibly to the museum in Rome.

You mean, Anders himself will pick up the shipment?

Silence! You have instructions never to mention his name!

STEFANO: What harm can it do? Save

for the dog downstairs, we're alone.

DR ANDRASSY: Very well.

Now, suppose we go over what you must do, point by point.

What are you doing here?

Here?

Oh, here. Matter of fact, I'm glad you asked me.

I was wondering if you could give Franceska a message for me.

There's a barbecue at Dawson's Grove next Saturday,

and I was thinking of...

I know what you heard, you, and I know how to make you forget!

No, not now. Not yet. Why not?

What else can we do with him?

I said not now!

Tie him up and lock him in the dressing room.

You've gained access to certain secret information.

Now, fearful of the consequences,

you transfer the burden of guilt to your second self.

A submerged second identity known only you.

What... What second identity?

Now this is very important, Mr Daniels.

Do you often visualise yourself as a dog?

What?

Now let's be honest.

Do you often stand in front of your shaving mirror,

and instead of your own face,

you see a shiny, moist, black shoe-button nose,

a strong intelligent head?

No!

Excuse me, sir. It's getting awfully late.

And Mom'll be worried about us.

Well, I don't see any reason why you can't go.

Well, good. I've had enough of this.

I was referring to the boy.

I'm afraid I'll have to ask you

to remain a while longer, Mr Daniels.

Just a few more questions.

Why don't you ask him a few questions?

He knows more about this than I do.

He'll tell you I'm telling the truth.

Perhaps we should question the boy.

There may be a hereditary factor present, between father and son.

Can't it wait, sir? I ought to be going.

Yes, they say heredity sometimes plays a role in lycanthropy.

Who are you calling a liar?

"Lycanthropy," Mr Daniels, is the alleged practice

of turning humans into witches and werewolves.

Don't be ridiculous. My son isn't any werewolf.

He's just a big, baggy, stupid-looking shaggy dog.

Pop, I'm worried about Wilby. He may be in trouble.

What do you think I'm in?

Now, just a few questions, my lad.

It won't do any good, sir. I don't know anything about all this.

Moochie!

What did you say?

I said I don't know anything and I'd like to go home, please.

Moochie!

Then you don't believe your brother is a dog?

Gosh, sir. Would you?

Moochie!

And your father made up this entire story about the dog?

It was his idea?

Pop's a great storyteller.

Kids come from all around just to hear him.

Moochie!

Sorry, Pop. I had to do it.

Betts, I'm letting the boy go.

Please see that he gets home in a company car.

(BETTS OVER INTERCOM) Yes, sir.

All right, son.

Moochie!

You go back to my office and Mr Betts will take care of you.

Go ahead.

Moochie.

May I, doctor?

Of course.

Now, Mr Daniels, we've had our little joke about the dog.

Suppose we get down to cases. I want to know just how, when,

and where you found out about Section 32.

(CLOCK CHIMING)

Did you get it?

Yes, I have it.

Section 32, complete.

ANDRASSY: Good.

THURM: But we're in trouble.

Something's gone wrong at the plant.

What do you mean?

THURM: An investigation. My name was brought up.

I had to answer a few ticklish questions.

You knew the right answers, I trust.

Of course. But I didn't like the sound of them.

I'm not sure I wasn't followed here.

We'll have to use the emergency plan. The other is too risky now.

What about the boat?

STEFANO: It's tied up at Walker's Dock, ready to go.

ANDRASSY: Very well. Bring the sedan around.

What about the boy?

We'll be out of the country before they find him.

ANDRASSY: I don't understand what could have gone wrong.

Are you sure that...

Yes? What do you want?

I wanted to say I'm going out with Buzz Miller.

I'm sorry, Franceska, but I've been called away for a few days.

And I would like you to come with me.

Isn't this rather short notice?

Where are we going?

I have no time for questions. Please, get ready.

If you don't mind, I think I'd prefer to stay here.

You'll do as I say.

What is this?

ANDRASSY: Franceska, you're an intelligent girl.

I don't believe I have to make any needless threats.

Take her to her room. See that she takes that she needs.

Hurry!

(GRUNTING)

Here you are, son.

Thank you very much, sir.

We don't want to attract attention. Drive at a normal speed.

(GRUNTING)

Wilby! Wilby! Here, Wilby!

(MOOCHIE WHISTLES)

Wilby! Here, Wilby. Wilby!

(WHISTLES) Here, Wilby! Here, Wilby!

Here, Wilby!

MOOCHIE: Wilby!

In here, Moochie! In here!

In here, Moochie! In here!

Wilby, what's going on?

Come on, they're getting away.

They're heading to Walker's Dock.

BUZZ: Hey, look out!

(BOTH GRUNTING)

Someday I'm going to murder that dog!

Hey, you mangy cur, come back with my car!

Wait! Stop!

Hold it! Stop!

Officer! Officer, get him!

Get him. That shaggy dog stole my car! (PANTING)

A shaggy dog.

No use, Kelly. I've just got to face it.

I've got to face it.

Follow that dog!

(TYRES SCREECHING)

Hey, wait! Wait for us.

Never mind, Buzz! Here comes my pop!

Pop! Pop! Follow that police car.

Montgomery, don't you ever speak to me again.

Come on, Pop! We just can't let them get away.

You don't know what you're asking me to do.

Do you know what I've gone through in the last two hours?

Look, please. I'm not a well man.

Chicken.

Patrol Car 12, Hanson, Code 22.

We are pursuing a stolen car

headed west on Highway 16 at high rate of speed.

Request other police units be notified.

Repeat, Patrol Car 12. We are pursuing a stolen car

travelling west on Highway 16 .

Description of suspect as follows.

Large shaggy dog, dirty white,

brown patches, breed unknown.

Have him repeat that description.

Car 12, repeat description of suspect. Over.

Repeat description of suspect as follows.

Large shaggy dog, colour dirty white, with brown patches.

Hanson. This is Captain Scanlon. What's the matter with you?

Patrol Car 12. Hanson. We are pursuing stolen car.

Suspect identified as large shaggy dog. Out.

Answer me!

Hanson. Hanson. Do you hear me? Report in here immediately.

Hanson!

Patrol Car 7. Patrol Car 7. Mercer, are you there?

Patrol Car 7, Mercer. Over.

Mercer, there are two loonies by the name of Hanson and Kelly,

masquerading as police officers. Now, they're headed your way.

Pick them up and bring them in immediately. Over!

Patrol Car 7, Mercer. Message clear. Acknowledge and out.

Poor old Hanson.

There he is.

Get out of there.

No, you don't. Come here. Come here!

Here. Now bend over that hood.

Hanson.

What are you...

Well, it's possible.

Isn't it?

(BARKING) Look out!

Ouch! Ouch!

HANSON: He bit me!

I don't see anything.

(GUNSHOTS FIRING)

No, Kelly! No, that's our car.

We're being followed. Open it up.

That wasn't Hanson!

Patrol Car 7, Mercer. Patrol Car 7, Mercer.

Request additional instructions. Over.

You've got your instructions. Bring in Hanson and Kelly!

Wish to report mobile unit assigned to Officers Hanson and Kelly

passed this point a moment ago.

Officers Hanson and Kelly were not in it. Over.

Really? Well, may I ask who was in it?

A large shaggy dog, sir. Description as follows.

Colour, dirty white, brown patches.

Was driving the mobile...

Would you have them send my car around, please?

That is, unless it's been stolen by a purple kangaroo

wearing a chequered vest! Yes, sir.

(ENGINE ROARING)

(POLICE SIREN BLARING)

HANSON: No! Stop! No!

No, no, no, you idiots! No!

Well, well. If it isn't Hot-rod Hanson, speeding.

And you, who used to be sergeant. (LAUGHS)

All right. Mercer, very cute. Now come on!

Sorry. We're to bring you in.

I can't go back without that dog.

Sorry. I got the word from Scanlon. Loud and clear.

Ed, please. For the love of a fellow officer.

We were rookies together.

I married your sister, Felice.

I loaned you my dress uniform for the Shriners' Convention.

Ed, don't these things mean anything to you?

All right. I'll take a chance, Hanson.

But you just better pray you know what you're doing.

(BRAKES SCREECHING)

Cast off!

(GROWLING)

(SCREAMS)

Hey, get off of there!

(GRUNTING)

Let go of me! You devil, you, I'll fix you.

No! Chiffon, look out!

Chiffon, look out!

Stop it, you!

Chiffon, stop it!

(SCREAMS)

(BARKS)

(POLICE SIRENS BLARING)

Mercer, call the harbour police. Have them stop that boat.

(YELLS IN PAIN)

What's the matter, Mr Daniels? Go ahead, go ahead.

I'm all right. I've just broken my foot, I think.

Did they get away? Did they get away? Where's Wilby?

Apprehend 32-foot speed cruiser,

headed towards Gilly's Point. Over.

You all right?

Buzz.

There, there, everything's under control.

But how in the world did you get here?

Last thing I remember... Chiffon!

Don't you worry your pretty little head.

Old Buzz got here just in the nick of time, that's all.

FRANCESKA: But, Buzz... BUZZ: Now don't thank me.

It was nothing. Nothing at all.

(BARKING)

What's the big idea? What's the matter with you?

Let go of me!

(BARKING AND GROWLING)

I didn't do anything.

Chiffon! Let go, you silly mutt! Ow! Stop it!

Will you cut it out?

That's the man, Captain. That's him.

No! No, I'm innocent.

No, no, look, I'm innocent.

No, no, I haven't done anything wrong.

I'll explain the whole thing to you again. You see, my boy's a dog.

(GROWLING)

Just in the nick of time. A great, big hero, are you?

(BOTH GRUNTING)

Wilby!

Good old Buzz, huh? Right in the nick of time, are you?

The great, big hero, eh?

BUZZ: Wilby, will you lay off?

I don't know what you're talking about.

Wilby!

WILBY: Don't know what I'm talking about? I bet you don't.

Chiffon! It was you. You saved my life.

My wonderful, beautiful dog.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

My hero.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

Uh, over here with that.

Mr Daniels, you're in the way. Do you mind?

Oh, no. Not at all. Thank you.

Now let's... This stuff will clutter up the picture.

Here. Mind holding these, please?

Thank you very much. Now, Ed, get ready for a picture.

Now, Mr Daniels. A picture for our Sunday follow-up story.

A human interest angle.

How your love for dogs made the whole thrilling thing possible.

Fine. Now, Mr Daniels,

if you'll just sit on the arm of the chair...

That's it. All right, boy. Up. Up on the chair.

Now just a minute! I will not have that dog on my good chair

with his big dusty feet.

Oh, don't worry about it, honey. A dog can't hurt anything.

How me with my arm around him, like this?

Fine, fine.

This all right?

PHOTOGRAPHER: That's fine, fine.

Now... Oh, how about one with your son?

Oh. Well, why not?

Come here, son.

No, no, not you. The little fella.

Come on, Wilby. Let's take a walk.

You stay just like that. Good.

Mr Daniels, you'll be looking at your son.

All right. That's fine, fine.

Anyway, It sure was nice of Franceska to give us the dog.

That old house is sure going to seem

empty with her gone back to Paris.

Yeah. Swell girl.

Oh, well. I guess it's all for the best.

I was getting tired of all that French lingo anyway.

You wanna know something else?

I don't think we've been quite fair to Allison.

She's a swell girl, too.

Yeah, good sport. Real good sport.

Anyone else might have gotten sore.

Hi, Allison! Hi, Allison!

(CAR HORN HONKING)

(TYRES SCREECHING)

You know them?

Oh, just a couple of neighbourhood children.

Hey, let's get the medal in this picture, huh?

Medal? What medal?

Valour award?

Well! (LAUGHS)

No, no, no, Mr Daniels. The medal is for the dog.

Oh. (LAUGHS)

There.

PHOTOGRAPHER: That's good.

Well, I finally got a dog.

What do you mean, you got a dog? We got a dog.

(BARKING)