Original subtitles

WOMAN: And that ends this day of trading

the Dow dropping 645 points

the seventh largest percentage drop in history

and the largest point total ever.

The bad news hit before the opening bell

when the Gehrman-Driscoll Fund

the largest hedge fund in the U.S.

announced it was filing for bankruptcy.

Yeah, it's a proud day for Alfred Nobel.

Mr. President.

When do you think I say something?

If Japan doesn't step up.

Tell me again.

Keith. Muriel Keith.

Mr. Keith.

Mr. President.

I told my granddaughter I was meeting you

and I asked what questions

she wanted me to ask you and she said to ask you

of all the presidents you've met who is your favorite

and I assured her that it would be me.

( chuckles )

No, no. Um...

Mr. Truman.

He was a good man.

Okay, well, I was just kidding, but, sure

Truman, if you like that kind of thing.

MAN: Uh, gentleman, I'll be ready

in just one minute. I'm sorry.

How old were you when you met President Hoover?

Nine years old.

It was my birthday.

It was October the 23rd, 1929.

The 23rd?

Yes, sir.

Is there something unusual about that?

No, no.

It's just... it's...

You shook hands with him, and the next day

the Great Depression started.

Yes, sir.

Okay.

Stock market took a stumble today.

You know, we'll call it... well, a little bigger

than a pre-rally decline.

If you watch the news

or read a newspaper

or really are alive in any way

you're going to hear about it in the next couple of hours.

I'm not worried, though

'cause Tokyo opens at 7:00 PM Eastern

at Tokyo's going to be my mother's milk tonight.

It's in the bag.

MAN: Okay, gentleman

right this way.

On the count of three. One...

No. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Sorry, could I just have one second?

Charlie?

How you doing?

Fine, thank you.

There's a lot of science in economics to be sure

but like a lot of things, a lot depends on the user.

I need the Nikkei Index to do what I need it to do tonight

and I've got Hoover's good luck charm over here.

But now, while I'm talking about it

I feel like it's ridiculous that someone like me

would consider canceling a photo-op...

I can't believe you're considering doing it, sir.

I'm not, it's momentary.

No, I mean I can't believe you're considering doing it.

Really?

Tokyo opens in three hours

and you're going to drape

your arm around the Mayor of Shantytown?

I didn't know you were superstitious.

I'm not.

Plus there are the tribes in South America

that don't think a photograph's a good idea to begin with.

Yeah.

You ever see any pictures on my desk?

No.

You ever wonder why?

Charlie, just out of curiosity

in your mind, how much time do I spend thinking about your desk?

Fair point, sir.

How long have we been talking about this now?

A couple of minutes.

Okay, let's not tell anybody that.

Mr. Keith, I'm sorry

we're going to have to reschedule this for tomorrow.

Oh, why?

You're spooking the hell out of the President. Just scheduling.

I'm... I'll explain it.

Thank you.

C.J.: Sam?

Yeah.

Whatcha' doin' on the floor?

I don't know.

I think it was just the closest thing.

Come on, you'll get your pants all shmutsy.

The First Lady's not a lesbian, is she?

I don't know. I can ask her.

Why were there rolling pins?

Brenda Swetland: "At this moment, you're not licensed

to practice medicine, correct?"

A. Bartlett: "At this moment, I'm just a wife and mother."

I don't see it.

Well, you got to want it.

Oh, I see it.

Yeah.

What are we doing?

Well, I wanted my office to issue a statement saying

"You're annoying, shut up," but Bruno said

to wave at it and he's right.

Yeah. Listen.

I know this is the last thing you want to hear right now

but I want to get Anthony a Big Brother

and Charlie said no, and I thought if it was

anything you might be interested in

I could talk to you about it.

It's an hour a week.

He doesn't have anybody

and you know he hasn't gotten over Simon.

You asked Charlie first?

There's no way you have time for this.

I might.

You don't. Ginger.

You just worked 48 hours straight.

Yeah.

And that was the weekend.

Maybe he'd enjoy sitting and watching me work.

I could narrate what I was doing for him.

"Right now, I'm reading background intelligence

"on Central America as it relates

"believe it or not, to textile imports.

"Ooh, intelligence.

007."

See, and right away I've got him going with 007.

I'm sitting here listening

already I've turned to a life of crime.

You know I'd do it if I could.

I do know that

shmutsy pants.

That's going to be around for a while, right?

Josh is on the phone.

Thanks.

Hey.

How's it going?

Fine, so far.

Just Bryce, right?

Yeah. Let me ask you something.

He was saying that Commerce

didn't have enough input on the stump speech

and I started to say that it was my fault

and the President kind of ran me over.

Yeah, he doesn't like the appearance

that his staff is covering for him.

It genuinely wasn't his fault.

Nothing's not his fault in the Oval Office.

Got it.

Anything else before we get on the train?

Could you put Toby on?

Yeah. Toby. Sam.

Was Bryce pissed?

Yeah. Listen.

With the secretarial candidates the last few weeks

Charlie says he's been asking questions about

remembering names and numbers.

He's worrying about short term memory loss, right?

It's one of the effects of...

Yeah.

Okay.

Anything else?

Come home.

We're on our way.

Don't worry, I'll have Jews for the money stuff?

You have an inadvertent habit of putting down my Judaism

by implying that you have

a sharper anti-Semitism meter than I do.

You know, the Ancient Hebrews

had a word for Jews from Westport.

They pronounced it Presbyterian.

And by saying things like that.

I'm just saying I'm from Brighton Beach.

Well, Mohammed al Mohammed

el Mohammed bin Bizir doesn't make the distinction

when he suits up in the morning.

As long as you have a good grasp

of the complexity of that situation.

What the hell are the two of you talking about?

I assure you neither one of us knows.

MAN: All aboard!

Tyler, assure me there's going to be no trouble.

There's going to be no trouble.

The train runs on regular train fuel.

I'm pretty sure.

You guys don't have your very own international dateline

in Bloomington or anything?

No.

In that case, on behalf of Bartlet for America

and the Democratic Party

I want to thank you for your help

and tell you that you're a good guy

and good luck to you.

Thanks. I'm going to go find seats.

Take it easy.

Mr. Lyman, Mr. Ziegler.

Call me Josh.

Toby. I work at the White House.

Yeah, can I tell you something?

People are going to think you're a lot cooler

if you don't say that yourself

but rather let them find out on their own.

Okay.

The engineer knows the route?

Josh, Toby, on my girlfriend's life

your troubles end 98 miles right down that track.

Nancy.

Leo. Yeoman Fitzwallace.

Dr. McNally.

Let's attack.

Who?

Qumar. Let's recommend to the President that we attack.

Why? 'Cause I've had it.

I don't think the UN is going to let us do it for that reason.

That's 'cause you're a sissy.

You want peace in the Middle East?

Give me a pair

of third generation ICBM's and a compass.

You get B-2 Spirit stealth bombers over Qumar right now

as if the Qumari Air Defense System

requires stealth capability.

Just fly in at night, and while you're at it

could you order the USS Louisiana to fire off

a D-5 Trident just to see if it works?

What's the worst that could happen?

Is she talking to me?

Yes!

Well, 98% of all living organisms

within a seven mile radius would die instantly

in a torrent of fire.

Admiral Sissymary...

We're running out of options on the menu.

What's happened?

There's intel that says that Qumar has a tape.

Of what?

A cell phone call

that Shareef made from the plane.

There isn't.

We disabled the phones.

We monitored communication from the plane

we bugged Shareef and we replaced

his cell phone battery

with a dummy.

There's no tape, there was no phone call.

Why are they saying there is?

It's to provoke a response, right?

Yeah. And they're using the Act V

scene from Hamlet? Are these Batman villains?

They're building a case for sure

but I think we got to start talking about

there's something worse than Qumar saying it was us.

She's right.

What?

Qumar saying it was someone else.

You have to be more specific than that.

Mr. President, in my state the only ones making inroads

into keep kids in school and off drugs are the churches

and the synagogues and the mosques.

They have terrific programs--

and until we find a better one, let me fund those.

We're going to talk about it around here

but I wouldn't...

Yes, sir. Okay.

Thank you, sir. Thank you.

How are the interviews going?

I met with two women this morning on the plane

I'm meeting another in a little bit.

Are either of this morning's women possibilities?

No. Why?

Well, the first one isn't easily impressed.

What makes you say that?

She told me. The second one wasn't funny.

She wasn't funny? Or rather, didn't think I was.

You told a joke?

She was the secretary to an Ambassador to France.

I told her that I'd had dinner with the D'Astier

at the Elysée Palace.

She gently corrected me at that point

calling it the Palais de l'Elysée--

for that alone, I wanted to send for a parachute.

And I made a joke to D'Astier having to do with cheese

and I said that D'Astier was visibly insulted

and that he was reconsidering my diplomatic status

and she said "Well, did he?"

She didn't get you were joking.

It didn't bode well for me.

Who's this afternoon?

A... crazy woman that Charlie knows.

Hey, do we have a GPS readout on Josh and Toby?

Have they been sighted?

I talked to them a little while ago

they're on their way.

300 IQ points between them--

they can't find their way home.

I swear to God, if Donna wasn't there

they'd have to buy a house.

( sighs )

"You've got to be able

"to keep a lot of names and numbers in your head.

Can you do that?"

"Oh, I should think so."

Oh, should you?

Okay, well, I'm going to interview a few more people

and in the meantime, you can get your ass

back on the cover of The New Yorker where it belongs.

Was that Unimpressed One, or Humorless?

A third one.

Charlie says I don't want anyone to replace her.

Is that true? I don't know, Sam.

I'm a puzzle.

Yes, sir.

DONNA: All right, I've got a plan.

We're going to switch trains in Bedford.

We will then be going in the right direction.

We're not going to make the 6:15

that was a pipe dream; that was folly.

Now, there's a 9:30 leaving Indianapolis International

with a 45 minute layover in Chicago.

Although the ticket agent warned

that the flight could be delayed due to bad weather.

What are the chances of that?

Well, for what it's worth

the guy in the diner said

the reason the picture on the TV was fuzzy...

No, no!

Quaint is quaint, but we're not

Navajo Indian guides, and if we want weather information

we'll call the White House Operations Center.

Well, we can do that when we get to a pay phone

but we can't do that right now.

Why not?

Because my... Cell phone battery's out.

Yes.

I need information.

I need to know what's happening in the world-- I have no idea

what's happening in the world!

I bought you the paper.

I read it! Preparations

are under way for the fair-- I'm briefed.

Organizers say it's going to be the best one yet.

What else you got?

Frivolous law firms.

What?

He meant to say "frivolous law suits"

and he said "frivolous law firms."

Who?

Benjamin Disraeli.

He misspeaks.

Yes, he does.

He also thinks Sarajevo and Bosnia

are two different countries

so that's a bit of a setback for the region.

Yes.

Chamberlain led England in World War II.

I don't mind that

he doesn't know history

I mind that he hasn't seen a movie.

"Mexico is part of NATO."

He meant they were an ally.

What, did they lob a chalupa at the Warsaw Pact?

I agree, it's not impressive

but as you pointed out

he's going to be surrounded by...

Do you think he's ever disagreed with one of his advisors?

Do you think-- honestly-- do you think he's ever said

to one of his advisors "I've got a different idea?!"

I-I don't care if he thinks Luxembourg's

an uptown stop on the IRT.

And I don't care about the Greco-Roman wrestling matches

with the language-- not that polished communication skills

are an important part of this job-- what I care about

is when he was asked if he'd continue

the current U.S. policy in China

and he said "First off, I'm going to send them a message--

meet an American leader."

I don't know what that means, but everybody cheered.

Which is one of the reasons

that I work full time for his opponent.

I don't know what gave you the impression

that I had to be convinced, but I want to win.

You want to beat him, and that's

a problem for me, because I want to win.

DONNA: Can I get

approval of my travel plan?

Yeah.

"A rising tide sinks all boats."

FIDERER: Is it all right to ask what he did for a year?

What do you mean?

He's been without a secretary for a year.

The President has five secretaries.

Four of then funnel their work through the executive secretary.

He has five secretaries?

He has two research secretaries

a social secretary, and a scheduler.

The scheduler has an assistant

whose job it is to keep the book.

What's "the book"?

It's the daily diary.

It's a minute by minute accounting

of what the President did that day.

"10:25, placed a phone call to the Fed Chair."

What about private stuff?

We've got euphemisms.

Every once in a while, there'll be a fluke cancellation

some kind of gap in the President's schedule

and the President and the First Lady

might slip over... You know.

For a "matinee"?

Yeah.

What do you call it?

"Barbecuing."

Okay.

MAN: The payment

and settlement systems worked fine.

The Dow's price/earnings is around 35.

The historical average is 18.

This isn't a crisis.

It's investors getting back to common sense.

Well, it's an election year, Bill.

We'd rather people didn't exercise common sense

but I agree with what you're saying.

Thank you, Mr. President.

Sir?

Yes?

Deborah Fiderer.

Really? Yes, sir.

All right.

Mr. President.

Hi.

Debbie.

Hello.

You two know each other?

Debbie worked for Donald McKittridge.

She's... very interesting.

Her resume's impressive; I remember thinking

she was efficient and creative.

She's the one who found Charlie.

I remember people talked about her a lot.

They found her pretty strange.

But I remember thinking

that I didn't find her that strange.

You know I can hear you, right?

( quietly ): I'm in your corner.

( clears throat )

You're the alpaca farmer.

It was something I tried for a while.

You hired Charlie, huh?

Well, I worked in the Office of Presidential Personnel

and he'd come into the wrong office.

He'd been called in about a job as a messenger.

I didn't know that.

Yeah.

We started talking; it doesn't take long to see

he's a special kid, so I sent him to Josh Lyman.

Well, thanks for that.

Yes, sir.

Who was in second place?

Who did I almost get?

Sir? I like to think

about the road not taken.

You're testing my memory.

Yeah.

It was a young man named David Dweck.

David Dweck? I used to call him

"David Dweck Want a Dwink of Wa Wa"

until I realized that wasn't really funny.

( knock on door )

Excuse me, Mr. President; you said you wanted...

Yeah.

Hong Kong's down 4%, but it's still over 10,000.

It's too early to tell anything.

The Nikkei's down 2%, the dollar's down

.3% against the yen; .4% against the Euro.

Frankfurt opens in eight hours.

Thanks.

Thank you.

Sorry.

Why were you fired?

I'm sorry?

Why were you fired?

No particular reason.

That doesn't sound quite right.

No?

Why were you fired? Is it relevant?

Only because you're asking for a job.

Chronic lateness.

I don't believe you.

It's true. No, it's not.

You call me a liar to my face?

Yes.

Okay.

Charlie said it was because of him.

He did? He said you hired him

and that's why you got fired.

Charlie makes things up.

No, he doesn't.

He's a bad seed.

I knew it the moment I saw him.

I'm now ordering you to tell me

why you were fired.

Well, I'm afraid we're at a classic impasse, Mr. President.

You were strange the first time I met you, and you're strange now.

Hey, the first time you met me there was a good reason.

What?

I was high.

Okay.

This time, it's just me.

Tell me why you were fired.

No, sir. I'm going to figure it out anyway.

What I lack in memory, I more than make up for

with exceptional powers of deductive reasoning.

That come with tights and a cape?

All right.

I think the interview's over.

Yeah.

But let's do this every once in a while.

Thank you very much.

Debbie.

Mr. McKittridge...

What are you doing here?

I-I was... I was interviewing... I brought her in.

Charlie, how many times do we have to... Hang on.

I know, but I brought her in.

It doesn't matter. I'm not getting the...

It does matter-- there's a way it works.

Brian Dweck, CFO of Colfax

and contributor to Representative Mark McKittridge

whose brother

is the Director of the White House

Office of Presidential Personnel, wants a job

for his son, David-- "Wants a Drink of Wa Wa."

My powers of deduction

are not to be mocked. Mr. President

I assure you, whatever she told you...

She didn't tell me anything.

I ordered her to, and she...

By the way, my powers of ordering are a joke.

I can create an agency, but I can't get her to...

She didn't give you up.

She, um...

she didn't give you up.

( door closes )

Was she funny?

Have the agents stop her at the door for a second.

Debbie.

Yes, sir.

Where's the dollar?

I'm sorry, sir?

What's the dollar doing right now?

Oh, it's down; .3% against the yen

.4% against the Euro.

NANCY: Mr. President...

the First Lady's back.

( chuckles ): Bring her on.

That's when it's scheduled.

Probably more like 8:30

and he's going to speak for 15 minutes.

Any comment on the CBO deficit numbers?

Last OMB was $11 billion off.

CBO missed by $25 billion.

There's going to be a deficit, but the CBO numbers are off.

Legislative appropriations?

He can't say until he sees the bill.

All right, that's a full lid.

I'll see you all over there.

Hang on a second.

Okay, today at 5:32 PM Central Savings Time

two pipe bombs were set off inside the Geiger Indoor Arena

which is the swimming team's facility

at Kennison State University.

The Kennison Hawkeyes.

The women's team was hosting a match.

A meet with Illinois, Michigan and Minnesota.

They're all Big Ten schools.

44 people are dead.

Looks like about 100 injured, about 20 critically.

I'm going to have to listen in

while I talk to you.

Barry, then Sydney, then Fran.

I didn't say I wasn't going.

I said I could live without it.

It sounded like you weren't going.

I forgot about it is all.

Did you have other plans?

As a matter of fact, I did.

I was planning a quiet night...

Watching your cooking show.

It's not just a cooking show, all right?

It's very relaxing.

The woman is sublime.

If you ask me

it's soft porn.

No one needs to massage garlic oil into a leg of lamb

that much, on top of which...

Hold on.

Why is she still on?

Well, the information that they were pipe bombs

is coming from...

We're getting both Campus Information

and Cedar Rapids police and fire

but I don't know any more details

on the type of pipe bombs or the extent of damage...

Find out what happened.

...getting specifics soon.

None of that has been confirmed.

Emergency squads are still on the scene

treating the minor... uh, injured.

Witnesses are saying

there were swimmers in the water

at the time of the explosion.

I don't think there's been much discussion

about motives or suspects.

There's been no mention of any...

* The silicon chip inside her head... *

DONNA: I don't understand the two of you.

JOSH: We had to get out.

He can't read in a moving car.

DONNA: You can't read in a moving car.

He can-- he was reading to us.

I need it to come in through my eyes.

You couldn't wait three blocks?

645 points.

Did it say how, how much the percentage drop was?

It did, but by the time I got there

my newspaper no longer had

the molecular structure of a newspaper.

Yes, can I help you?

Yes, please, we need a room.

Is that two rooms?

No, just the one

for what did we decide, half an hour?

Our, our flight, our flight was delayed

and we're just looking for someplace to dry off and watch the news.

* ...Tell me why I don't like Mondays... *

If the Nikkei hasn't reacted...

* ...Tell me why I don't like Mondays *

* I don't like, I don't like *

* I don't like Mondays too much *

* I don't like Mondays *

* I wanna shoot...

( thunder rumbling )

PRESIDENT: ...restoring abundance amid an economic shortfall

securing peace in a time of global conflict

sustaining hope in this winter of anxiety and fear.

More than any time

in recent history

America's destiny is not of our own choosing.

We did not seek, nor did we provoke

an assault on our freedom and our way of life.

We did not expect

nor did we invite a confrontation with evil.

Yet the true measure

of a people's strength

is how they rise to master that moment

when it does arrive.

44 people were killed a couple of hours ago

at Kennison State University.

Three swimmers from the men's team were killed

and two others are in critical condition.

When, after having heard the explosion

from their practice facility

they ran into the fire to help get people out.

Ran into the fire.

The streets of heaven are too crowded with angels tonight.

They're our students and our teachers

and our parents and our friends.

The streets of heaven are too crowded with angels

but every time we think

we've measured our capacity to meet a challenge

we look up and we're reminded

that that capacity may well be limitless.

This is a time for American heroes.

We will do what is hard.

We will achieve what is great.

This is a time for American heroes

and we reach for the stars.

God bless their memory, God bless you

and God bless the United States of America.

Thank you.

* ...I don't like Mondays... *

When did you write that last part?

In the car.

Freak.

* ...I wanna shoot...

Anthony

I'm so sorry.

Thank you for waiting.

This thing came up at the last minute.

A bomb at a swimming meet.

You probably...

I can take you home now.

You probably saw it here

on the television sets.

You know...

I really miss Simon, too.

That's... probably something we can talk about.

I asked around today.

I wasn't able to find anyone, but I'm not done.

There are more people I'm asking tomorrow.

I'll take you home now.

( mumbling )

I'm sorry?

I said I don't need a baby-sitter, bitch.

Are you deaf?

Well, I don't think you do need a baby-sitter.

What the hell is the matter...?

This is Ms. Cregg.

She's the White House Press Secretary

and Senior Counsel

to the President.

And if she wasn't, she would still be Ms. Cregg.

I don't mind you not respecting people.

I mind you doing it out loud.

I mind you doing it in this building.

You want to be a punk, fine

but I don't think you've got the size for it.

You want to go to juvey, get out, deal and kill cops

okay, but every time you do a crime, you get caught

so, I think you're going to have to do something else.

9:00 on Saturday mornings

I eat breakfast at Cosmos on Delaware.

I come here for an hour, do office work

and then I go to St. Jude's for an hour to play basketball.

You can go to juvey, or you can be at Cosmos

9:00 on Saturday morning.

It's entirely up to you.

( exhales )

Shmutsy pants.

I know that voice.

I was at the dinner.

I didn't see you.

Nice job on the speech.

What makes you think I wrote it?

"We did not seek, nor did we provoke

"we did not expect

nor did we invite..."

A little thing called cadence.

It works for you.

How's New York?

Richard got traded

to the Blackhawks.

For a Zamboni battery?

And Garniér

and a first round draft pick.

So you're moving to Chicago.

Richard and I split.

That is terrible.

That is... the worst thing.

I am so sorry.

I liked him, too--

his brooding stare in the penalty box.

If there's anything I can do.

Shut up.

Okay.

I came by to say hi.

I came by to tell you I liked the speech.

Thank you very much.

My dad said you staffed the President today.

Yes. How was it?

You know anything about chaos theory?

I know it has to do with fractal geometry.

That's about all I know, too.

But it has to do with there being order

and even... great beauty, in what looks like total chaos.

And if we look closely enough at the randomness around us

patterns will start to emerge.

( sighs )

I love Josh like a brother

and he's a world-class political mind

but until today, I didn't know he was smarter than I was.

I've worked here three years and eight months

and until you sit in the room all day

you can't comprehend the chaos of the Oval Office.

I had one good moment talking about

the global ripple effect of a budget deficit, but that was it.

The rest of the day was just keeping up.

And this was a pretty light day.

One good moment is good.

Oh, I'm not complaining.

I'm saying, one good moment is great.

It's a golf shot.

I've got to get back in there.

That's where it's happening.

You came by just to tell me you liked the speech?

"This is a time for American heroes

and we reach for the stars"?

I'm weak.

Yeah, I think I stole that from Camelot.

( exhales )

Let me get you home.

I don't think you're going to make it.

Yeah. I don't think I'm going to make it, either.

Camelot?

Good writers borrow from other writers.

Great writers steal from them outright.

MALLORY: Good night, Charlie.

Good night, Charlie.

Take it easy.

( paper rustling )

The picture's from Deanna. I just put it in a frame.

I've had it in my office for about a week.

I just keep forgetting

to give it to you.

Thanks.

It's nice.

Have a good night.

Good night.

( music playing )

JOSH: Campaigns aren't about the candidates.

TOBY: No?

They're about the voters.

How-how are we going to create jobs?

How-how are we going to fix health care?

How are we going to make the lights go on?

How are we going to protect ourselves?

Don't you want to ask if the plumber knows

which direction the pipes run?

Don't you...? Forget the plumber.

Don't... ( sighs )... we want leadership

to sound and to feel like

instead of appealing to our-our least expensive

however legitimate, desire to feel good about ourselves?

Don't we want...?

All right, that's it, I can't take it.

He started it.

I'm not kidding.

I have such an impulse to knock your heads together.

I can't remember the last time

I heard you two talk about anything other than

how a campaign was playing in Washington.

Cathy needed to take a second job

so her dad could be covered by her insurance.

She tried to tell you how bad things were

for family farmers.

You told her we already lost Indiana.

You made fun of the fair

but you didn't see they have livestock exhibitions

and give prizes for the biggest tomato

and the best heirloom apple.

They're proud of what they grow.

Eight modes of transportation, the kindness of six strangers...

random conversations with twelve more

and nobody brought up Bartlet versus Ritchie but you.

I'm writing letters, on your behalf

to the parents of the kids who were killed today.

Can I have the table, please?

Flight's delayed?

Yeah.

Me, too.

I'm going to St. Louis.

Washington.

I'm with my daughter.

She's up, uh, upstairs in the room

but we were out here looking at Notre Dame.

Yeah?

You got kids?

No.

Wait till you take your oldest to look at colleges.

It's an incredible feeling.

You wish they'd go to college

across the street from your house

but you know. Yeah.

A Jack Daniels rocks.

Yeah.

My boss went to Notre Dame.

Beautiful campus.

I've never seen anything like it.

( chuckles ): She-she's not going to get to sleep tonight.

You see what happened in the market today?

Yeah, I-I saw.

You invested?

Ehh...

Mutual fund that's supposed to send her to college.

I never imagined at $55,000 a year

I'd have trouble making ends meet.

And my wife brings in another 25.

( sighs ): My son's

in public school.

It's no good.

I mean, there's 37 kids in the class

uh, no art and music

no advanced placement classes.

Other kids, their mother has to make them

practice the piano.

You can't pull my son away from the piano.

He needs teachers.

And I spend half the day thinking about

what happens if I slip and fall down

on my own front porch

you know?

It should be hard.

I like that it's hard.

Putting your daughter through college

that-that's a man's job.

A man's accomplishment.

But it should be a little easier.

Just a little easier.

'Cause in that difference is... everything.

I'm sorry.

I'm, uh, I-I'm Matt Kelley.

( chuckles softly )

I'm Toby Ziegler.

I work at the White House.

Have a minute to talk?

We'd, uh... like to buy you a beer.

Hey.

McNALLY: Good morning, Mr. President.

FITZWALLACE: Good morning, sir.

LEO: Good morning, sir.

The happy fun group.

We have reason to believe that in the next 48 hours

the Qumari rescue team will announce

that they've recovered a military-issue

Israeli-made parachute.

They're just allowed to make things up now?

As long as we won't step up

and say it was us, they do.

They know it was us, right?

Yeah.

Is that what you think we should do?

Me? Yeah.

No, I don't.

I am, however, beginning to lean towards

reducing our nuclear arsenal one at a time

if you know what I mean, sir.

What about you?

Well, I'm with Dr. Strangelove

on keeping our military secrets secret.

But Nancy and Leo and I think there's a third option

which is to say it was us but insulate you.

I signed a piece of paper, Fitz.

We can get around that.

You just hated my living guts

when I got this job, didn't you?

No, sir.

Yeah, you did.

I didn't know anything

and I didn't have any respect for the Chiefs.

You became my counselor and you wrangled

the Chiefs and you brought them to me.

You got the Chiefs, sir. They respect you.

You brought them to me.

And you talked Leo into Shareef

and he talked me into it.

It was my order

and you executed it flawlessly

and I stand by it.

I stand by you, I stand by you all.

I stand by it till I die.

Plus, I'm going to need

some cell mates in Holland.

So, what do we do now?

We're in the situation room.

Let's go.

JOSH: You're telling me, we couldn't have just gone

to the nearest Chinese restaurant

picked up some Kikkoman

and poured it in that soy diesel thing?

I don't think it works like that.

Plus, how close do you think

the nearest Chinese restaurant was?

Well, we should start making cars that run on ketchup.

When I get home

I'm taking the longest hot bath of my life.

Excuse me, would you mind

letting me off up there

at the bridge?

DRIVER: You sure?

Yeah. I can walk to work from there.

Yeah, I'll hop out there, too.

Oh, please, not this again.

JOSH: Hey, you're the one who did the number

back at the bar.

It didn't have anything to do

with eliminating modern conveniences.

She can drop you off at home.

I'll get out with them up here.

If our job teaches us anything, it's that we don't know

what the next President's going to face.

And if we choose someone with vision, someone with guts

someone with gravitas

who's connected to other people's lives

and cares about making them better

if we chose someone to inspire us

then we'll be able to face what comes our way

and achieve things... we can't imagine yet.

Instead of telling people who's the most qualified

instead of telling people who's got the better ideas

let's make it obvious.

It's going to be hard.

Then we'll do what's hard.