All language subtitles for awp_s01e07_private_lives

Used all my options, worked off my dues.

Laid all the cards, now there's nothing
to lose.

Don't want tomorrow to be like today.

That's why I'm breaking away.

Not trying to run, not trying to hide.

What can I win if I'm losing my pride?

Only tomorrow.

like today why I'm breaking away

Same to you, sleepyhead.

What's the time?

Nine o 'clock thereabouts, and it's come
round again, hasn't it? Never fails.

A weekend, me old fruit.

Once again, we can put on some clean
gear and join the human race.

I find weekends the most depressing.

Not me.

Weekends are the hardest part.

Here, is it, Moxie?

Yeah, that's right.

I thought I recognised your elegant
footwear.

What's wrong with them? They're very
comfy, you know.

Yeah, well, they're hardly the height of
fashion, are they?

I like them.

I suppose if you're in there, I'd better
make other arrangements, eh?

Yeah, I think you'd better.

I think it's a thower kraut.

Yeah, I can play havoc with a bloke's
sister, I can.

Hey, I've got a job for you.

Oh, not before breakfast, Moxie, please.

Oh, no, it's really good, this.

It's about this Irishman, you know.

And he does tech about all the Irish
shows going on, you know, being Irish

himself, like.

So he decides he's going to take English
lessons, you know, learn how to speak

English for a bit.

Oh, like what you do, is that it, eh?
Oh, come on, it's really good.

After a few weeks, he's actually good
enough, you know, to go out to Wales and

try it out.

So he goes into this shop, and he says
to the bloke behind the counter, he

I'll have a copy of the telegraph.

One of the observers.

And one at a time.

And the bloke behind the counter said,
you're Irish, aren't you?

And the Irishman says, how do you know
that?

He says, this is a fish and chip shop.

Do you get it?

I thought it was funny.

Hey, do you hear the one about the bloke
who swallowed his black eye?

Well, Bummer's gone fishing with a
couple at the Eric.

Yeah? Yeah, Barry's working on the bike.

Moxie's on the bunk, so I wouldn't make
any plans apart from you.

I thought Dennis had been earlier.

Earlier?

I woke us up, clumped around.

Where was he going?

I don't know. He had a roll -up towel
under his arm, but he had all his

on. Yeah?

I don't think he was going swimming.

Damn, swimming?

Well, he wasn't going sunbathing, was
he? Nothing this crap up.

Any tea on the go?

Aye, kettle's on.

Hey, Lawrence, what a great idea.

What? Swimming.

I never thought of it.

Let's go on the bath, eh?

What for?

Why? It'd be a change, wouldn't it? A
bit of exercise.

It's something to do, at least.

I've got to go and get me washing, Mum.

Aye, OK, but after, let's go on to the
bath.

Well, it's something to do, isn't it?

Well, we could do. I haven't got a
cuddy.

Right, we'll stop off in the town and
buy them.

Oh, a kettle.

So the doctor's dead.

I can't see a thing.

And the boss there, that's funny,
because I can see you very clearly.

Oh, yes, very rich, son, very drow.

I was going to be there the first one
myself, though.

Funny how Dennis never said anything.

Ah, he's a cagey lad, then, man. He
likes to play everything close to the

It's been even worse lately.

You know, I was going out there tonight,
and I said to him, just casually, where

are you off to, Den?

Telled her to mind my own business.

Still fret about his divorce, man?

No, no, it wasn't that.

No, he wasn't doing a moody or anything.

In fact, he was quite chipper. That's
why I was so tucked back.

He's not really one of the lads, Den,
man.

He's too straight -laced.

Said he wants to get his own place.

Says if we've got to stop on here, he's
gonna find himself a flat.

Says he can't stand this hut anymore.

What's wrong with this place?

the next call?

Swimming, can you believe, eh?

That's a good idea.

Why? Well, it's exercise, isn't it? It's
madness, son.

Madness. No, it's not.

What now?

He's into all them old things, isn't he?
Yeah.

Tried to get me jogging the other week.
I said, no way.

Told him what happened to my brother -in
-law.

What did happen?

Well, he's into all that, isn't he? You
know, running, weight, callous bleeding,

fennec, whatever they call it.

Mind you, you've got to bear in mind the
bloke's a bit of a nutter.

Otherwise he wouldn't have married my
sister, would he?

I don't know your sister, do I?

Ah, and you're well out of it, aren't
you, son?

Anyhow, he goes jogging every weekend,
doesn't he?

Got all the gear and that, you know, the
Adidas tracksuit, headband.

He's got a sister, it must be. You'll do
yourself an injury, you will.

I was right, weren't I?

How do you mean?

Well, the only place to jog across a red
light are cats with roundabouts, aren't

they?

Got it by a tug and all about for the A2
to Dover. I nearly bought my own bit.

I don't think that's a good enough
reason for denigrating exercise.

There's a lesson to be learnt somewhere,
though.

I mean, if God had meant us to go
jogging every day, how come we weren't

wearing plimsolls, then?

Oh, but it's as good an hobby as any,
isn't it?

I think you need an hobby, especially
out here with enough all else to do.

I've got an hobby.

one which I pursue with great diligence
and dedication.

Oh, what's that?

Skirt.

Skirt?

No, I think of obvious things like, you
know, things like making more airplanes

or collecting butterflies, BMX, things
like that.

Yeah, well, Barry, that's because you're
a bit of a reddish, isn't it?

No, I'm not.

Well, I mean, you don't show much
inclination to jump the opposite sex, do

Neither of you.

Hey, that's not because I lack the
inclination, you know.

It's because I was very badly let down
by a girl from Runcorn.

Besides, you can't get out much, can
you? I mean, you spend half your life

insulting the bloody porcelain.

I think you're right, Wayne.

My education does lack a thing or two in
that direction.

Do you think...

Do you think you could give me one or
two tips?

You give us a lift into town, son, and
you're on.

Smart, huh?

All right, Boston.

Listen, where's something on your head,
you know?

What, I look like you?

You can be very rude, you can't wait.

Well... That helmet ain't going to help
your chances, is it, son?

Hey,

choke in a wig.

Pop her.

Ah, Stegmore, nice lady.

Yeah, very tasty, mate.

I never really noticed her before.

Ah, keeps herself to herself.

Come on, head her off.

Oh, it's less than one, is it?

Yeah, come on.

Hello there.

We need some overtime, eh? You with her?

Well, you don't normally work on
Saturdays, do you?

Sometimes. I can't. Yeah? I'd have
thought a girl like you would have

things to do than accounts.

I'd have thought a girl like you would
be spending Saturdays at home with their

boyfriend, you know.

Because a girl like you has got a
boyfriend, hasn't she?

Perhaps. Only perhaps, eh?

Still a chance, eh?

Look, if I were you, I would not live in
hope.

That's a bloody funny, eh? Why?

Come on, let's go.

All right.

You have been shopping?

Yeah. New socks, shirts, dry cleaning.

I am like a housewife doing a certain
morning shopping.

Do you also make your food in your
quarters?

Quarters? All like barracks.

Yeah, or cook.

Well, it's not exactly hard cuisine.

But it's fun, eh?

Nah, I find it pathetic.

Living in a wooden hut at my edge with a
bunch of lunatics.

Yes.

I just talked to two of them.

Oh, yeah?

When I was leaving.

I think I was being out of shape.

Think that?

That wouldn't surprise me.

God knows what they'd say if they knew I
was with you.

You're not going to tell them?

Certainly not.

Look,

unlike that lottery, I like to keep
things to myself.

I think you and me should be a closely
guarded secret.

Especially as you work on the site.

We are ashamed of them.

Right.

In this sexual jungle, you're a
predator, you are, Wayne.

I work alone, if that's what you mean.

Don't go in mob -handed like the lads.
Then all they do is booze and talk about

it. By the time they've worked up the
nerve to do something, they're all too

incapable. Have you no desire to form a
permanent attachment?

I have to one day, though.

Oh, maybe.

I got engaged once.

I think I still am, in fact.

But don't you know?

Well, I never broke it off officially,
though.

And she's still got the ring.

Do you still see her?

No. Would you write?

No. Does she write to you?

No.

Do you care?

No, I don't like her very much.

Why'd you get frigging engaged then?

I forgot.

I think it was because her dad had a
spare season ticket for the

Wanderers. Ah, well, obviously. I mean,
that could make a young lad's heart

sing, couldn't it?

Oh.

Am I really a radish wine?

I don't have an identity crisis.

Not on me day off. Time's slipping by.

Well, if I'm in your way, I'll just... I
said I'd fix this up, didn't I? I just

bide your time. No need to panic.

What you've got to realise is there's
thousands of them out there.

I mean, birds are like the Chinese army.

Once you jump to a few, you think that's
it for a while.

Then this whole new battalion comes over
the hill.

I only want one.

Yeah, well, that's where you and me
differ, son. I want the lot.

I've never been that ambitious myself.

Harry?

I think our prayers have just been
answered.

How's your mate?

Behind you.

Don't look now.

Show some cool.

Oh, right.

Pretty, uh, pretty tasty.

What do we do now?

Not us, son. You.

Me? No, you're the one that's got to
prove himself.

Sooner or later, you have to show what
you're made of.

Now, we've already had a flash.

Have we?

Yeah, when they came in. Bit of the old
eye contact.

Halfway there, aren't we?

Now, remember, don't go promising them
the world, all right? Or go for all that

boring preamble.

Just get straight to the point.

Bit of dazzling repartee. Right.

Straight to the point. Right.

Right.

OK.

Hello.

Er... Would you like to come back to our
huts?

Hey, you're still slimmer, aren't you?
At school, I was even better.

I won many prizes.

Did you win a prize for English, too?

Oh, yes, of course.

Just as well, I didn't know I wouldn't
have much to say to each other.

I think you're perfect for German.

Oh, hey, I might have to be around a
long time for that.

So?

Suits me.

Oh, so?

I don't believe it.

So go on, what made you come here?

Well, I seen you leaving when you told
us you were working out.

Ah, the whipping.

Wow, Dennis!

Hey,

isn't that the girl from the office?

Aye, hey, it's Grandpa.

Aye, apparently she comes here a lot,
like, you know, just...

Bump into her, just a coincidence,
like... Oh, I didn't get your hell in

man. It's lovely.

Hey!

Oh, it's a great idea, this stuff.

Isn't it nice?

Well, I can't understand why you never
call me up, can I?

I'll give you a raise.

Right.

I'm going to be stuck tomorrow after
that swim, lad.

You'll probably be sick and old. You
swore it off the pool.

How can I get chlorine poisoning, can
you?

Aye, it's usually fatal.

How fatal?

What do you mean, how fatal?

Fatal.

Fatal, isn't it?

You're like dead, aren't you?

How long do you think I've got then?

A matter of hours, I reckon, before
rising and agonising convulsions contort

your body. Well, better stop up, then,
haven't we? Give us another, er, try,

yeah, pulse, there, bottle for you.
Yeah.

Who are you calling?

Just somebody.

Oh, I gathered that.

Look, it's personal business, Neville,
right?

Oh, very sorry, I'm sure. Didn't mean to
pry. Look, even round here, it is

possible to want some privacy. In fact,
it's essential if you want to stay sane.

Yeah, I've got your one in.

Mate, yes.

Is that why you're wanting to ship out?
I suppose it is, aye.

I can't understand it, me. When we came,
you were all good mates, weren't we?

Look, the best way to stay, mate, is not
to get on top of each other, isn't it?

Well, there's nobody in the hut I want
to get on top of.

You're really funny.

I mean, I wouldn't mind hunting that dag
more.

What?

Oh, it looked nice in that bikini,
didn't it?

Big, brittle and big, strong thighs.

What's up, then?

Nothing.

Look, I've got to get off. I'm going
into town, right?

Tomorrow, him, he hasn't even drank his
beer.

He's in a right mood, isn't he?

It's nothing we said, is it?

I'm going in here. Oh, you're dumping
me, is that it? No, look, I've just got

get some things.

I said I'm sorry, didn't I?

Do you want to come back to our... No,

I've got a lot to learn. I admit...
Listen, we'll stick

it out, but I have got to get some
things. Now, pick us up back here in 20

minutes, OK? Oh, great, right, yeah.

More well, isn't it?

Yes, it seems so.

Oh, look, I'm sorry if my friend was a
bit forward this morning.

It don't mean nothing.

It's just his way, you know.

Are you waiting for a friend, then?

Yes.

Hey, drive on. Fuckin' see loose.

Power, I, uh... I'll be off then.

Good. I mean, goodbye.

What's your offer of it?

Get in.

Don't think your friends are following
us around. What are you doing here?

I don't know.

Perhaps it was just a coincidence.

Well, I did warn you.

Look, maybe we should not try.

Try what?

We're making this a secret.

Why can't you tell your friends I'm
being with Dagmar and it is none of your

business? No, no. Look, I happen to need
something that's some relationship or

whatever that's just mine.

It's got nothing to do with them.

Also, I'm doing this for you.

For me?

Yeah.

Look, I don't want you to be the object
of their...

I don't want to hear them talking about
you the way they talk about other women.

But I don't care how they talk about me.

Well, I do.

There is a God, Barry. Come then.

Oh, my goodness, here are those dishes.

Stewardesses, they call them films
nowadays, you know.

Good evening.

Do you speak English?

Yes.

I thought you would in your job. Where
are you from?

Sweden. Sweden?

I thought you were Swedish.

Something about your flawless complexion
told me that.

Well, yes, but what do you want?

Me? Oh, nothing.

It's just that me and my chauffeur here
are sort of strangers in a foreign land,

much like yourselves.

Only we were feeling very depressed.

We caught a glimpse of you two and it,
well, sort of lifted our heart.

Yes, what?

Made us feel glad all over.

What's happening?

It's hard to tell, son. We're dealing
here with a Swedish mentality, which is

pretty unscrutable at the best of times.

We're away, son.

Follow that car.

Come on. It's all right, it's all right.

The lights have changed.

Oh, no.

Bloody hell. Freaking radish, Barry.
Will you stop calling me that, please?

You've lost them.

I took a left.

If you lose them, I'll aim for you,
Barry. I'll smear it. I'll aim for you.

a shortcut.

How?

I've got to cross there, look.

Yeah, well, be careful then.

Jesus Christ!

See?

Overnight stuff, innit?

Oh, shall we go in then, or what?

Go in? You see, in the state of us, we
look like a pair of motocross riders.

Oh. I suppose we'd better go back and
get cleaned up then, eh? Right.

We shall return.

All right.

You seem a bit more cheery.

What's that, Kevin?

You seem in a better mood.

Oh.

Didn't realise that I was in a bad one.

Well, you've hardly been a life and soul
the last few days.

You've been very distant.

Well, I'm sorry.

Oh, it's OK.

I understand.

It's because of Vera and the divorce and
that, isn't it?

But, you know, I've been thinking.

I mean, I can't talk to you personally,
can I, then?

You're going to tell me something that
my best friends won't, eh?

No, I... It's just that... Well, I know
where you're at.

And you know what I think would be the
best thing for you?

What? A woman.

A woman.

Am I? Not just a stump. I mean a nice
woman.

Somebody you can communicate with.

Somebody that would share common
interest.

You mean a woman pretty?

Go on. Why wouldn't you take it
seriously?

I'm saying this out of friendship for
you, man. You helped me out when I was

depressed. I'm sorry, Dave. I appreciate
that. It isn't as if I haven't given it

a lot of thought.

No, no.

Obviously. See, I think you should leave
your past behind. Find yourself a nice

girl over here.

He's still a young man, you know,
Dennis.

Aye.

Aye, bonnie lad, you've probably hit the
nail right on the head.

Aye, well, what are mates for?

Hey, what have I already had?

Had what?

Found myself a nice lap.

Oh, come on. I know you two well, then.

Oh, sorry, then.

Sorry, then.

Sorry. Oh, did you get nuts, then?

Pulling, son.

Unbelievable. They're British. Swedish
girls.

Swedish? Yeah.

Stewardesses, need I say any more?

No, I think the term they prefer these
days is quite attendant, isn't it?

Because apparently they regard the term
stewardesses as sexes. Never mind the

terminology, son. Just find yourself a
clean shirt. Right.

Are you going to meet them?

Well, you know, we ain't got a date.
Well, exactly, but we're meeting them at

the Intercontinental. They're staying
there.

Yep, and we're going to steam right in
there, son.

Shall we?

Which cologne is guaranteed to send your
average Scandinavian into a frenzy?

And then, you know what he said? He
said, come on, Dennis, I know you too

So they do not see you as a woman
chaser?

Well, I'm not.

Maybe I should say I didn't used to be.

I'm obviously making up for it, eh, in
me old age.

But you deserve it.

And you know something?

Me too.

Yeah, it still feels a bit strange,
though.

Strange?

Well, you know, you, me, hotel.

But it's a very nice hotel.

And you and I are very nice people.

Oh, come on. I have to go and take a
shower now. And you better reserve for

dining room.

I'll get some drinks, gentle.

What? Shh. Quiet, son.

Big score coming up here. Weird and
horny. Shh. Whoa, man. I'm nearly on

and a half million, man.

Just put two Swedish air hostesses.

Air hostesses?

Swedish, man.

Well, I might as well get a beer. What
for?

I mean, I can understand weird, but
barry.

Two bottles of Pilscher at all?

Yeah.

Jammie, I don't know how they managed
that.

Well, they haven't exactly nailed them
yet.

But they know they're stopping at the
Intercontinental so they're going round

there on the... It's hardly guaranteed,
is it? I suppose not.

They'll probably hang around in the bar
there all night, F, and out. Then come

back and spin some extravagant tale for
our benefit.

Well, yeah, that's them.

Hang on a minute.

So you reckon they'll just be sitting in
the bar on the up chance, hanging

around waiting?

Aren't you?

Right, let's get them.

Huh? Setting them up?

Oh? Well, stroke I pulled a hotel in
Sheffield one time.

It was a night before Newcastle played
Burnley in the semis.

Hey, what a game that was, kiddo.

Four. Supermax scored twice.

And on the way back, we smashed this
little ship up on the air, weren't it?

never mind that, man. What was this
done?

Oh, right. Follow me.

What are we going to do, then? Just sit
here all night on the office, or what?

Just bide your time.

I'll think of something.

You're a resident, so?

Yeah, er, but I'll pay, Kay.

Keeps you changing.

What do you say that for?

We're not staying here.

Yeah, but we could be if things work
out, eh?

Oh, we don't look like residents.

Especially if your hair cuts an earring.

Well, I don't think we're roadies.

Oh, off that chance.

Leave it out, will you?

Have a drink.

Hello?

Yeah. Hello, isn't that Continental?

Yeah. Hello.

Yes. Can you get a message, please, to
Mr. Wayne Norris?

Yeah, Herr Norris.

Yes, he'll be in the bar.

Yes, and the message is that he's
expected immediately.

Yeah, immediately in room 612.

Yes, that's it.

Dankeschön.

That'll wind him up.

Hey. It's been all right. Uh -huh.

Telephone for you, please.

How did they know we were here?

I don't know. Must have clocked us,
sonny.

Seen us come in or sit in it. Who cares,
son?

They're up there eagerly awaiting us,
aren't they?

Do I look all right?

Do you have to wear that jacket?

Don't undermine me confidence. Not now,
for Christ's sake.

Look, you're adorable, son.

Adorable. Right.

Strangers in the night, exchanging our
thoughts.

Come this way, this way.

Yeah.

Yeah. Right.

602.

604.

606. Evening.

It's all right.

I will be finished soon.

No, there's no rush, Pat.

Bloody room service.

Wanted those drinks ages ago.

Dadma, just stay in there and don't come
out.

What? Shh! Just stay in there, please.

Sorry.

What are you doing here, then, Dan?
Well, I just, uh, I fancied a weekend on

own, you know. Thought I'd, uh, check
into a hotel.

Huh? Well, well, not really. I mean,
it's, uh, it's warm and comfortable and

I've got me own bathroom.

It's a change from the hut, isn't it?

Oh, no.

Uh,

look, look, get us out of this, Dan,
will you? Buy us out.

Uh, what's the problem, squire?

We're visiting a friend, aren't we?

Oh, these gentlemen are with you.

Er, yes, yeah.

Oh, I am sorry.

All right?

All right.

Nice room, Dad.

It's, er... Oh, yes, very well
appointed, isn't it?

You know what, Dad? You've got a point,
you have.

Bit of luxury of a weekend, bit of
privacy, eh? If I had a chance of that

you two, yeah. What are you two doing in
this hotel?

We're about to get it together with
these two stewardesses, Sue. Right

they are. Oh, Swedish.

Yeah, they're staying here, Sue, three
doors down. They paced us and we're

to do the business, aren't we, babe? Oh,
I shouldn't think, you know, straight

off, Wade.

I should imagine we'd have to brag to
yours, you know, a bit of charm, a few

drinks. Well, I wouldn't keep the ladies
waiting if I was you, eh? We'll just

wait till that nosy Eric pisses off, eh?
Oh.

Here, Dean.

Why don't you come with us, eh? Yeah.

About to have a couple of mates.
Obviously, all the aircrews stay here,

So the place must be crawling with
uniform cramping. I've told you, I just

to have a bit of time on me, Jack, you
know.

Feeling a bit depressed, are you? No,
no, I just have to sort a few things

Ah, you need your own space, as they
say. Yeah, yeah, I wouldn't mind, Barry,

yes. You can't mean to tell me, mate,
that you'd rather sit in a lonely hotel

room watching poxy German TV and go down
a road there and strump some Nordic

nymphs... Look, lads, the course must be
clear by now. I mean, why don't you

just push off, leave me be, OK?

Suit yourself, son.

But this offer will not be repeated, you
know. Yeah.

Then, obviously, it wishes to be a lie.
Bingo!

Talking at last.

Ah, Duncan.

Unterschreiben Sie bitte.

Danke. Danke. Guten Abend.

Hey, hey, hey, hey. You're a slow one,
you old mate, eh? He's got an

barrier. He's got another party coming.
Obviously.

Oh, dear, oh, dearie. Why don't you two
just bugger off, man?

Yeah, all right.

You know, a camel. Tell us. Look, Wayne.
Who is she? Do you mind?

It's not that Dagmar, is it?

Why the hell would it be her?

Well, she seems to like you, doesn't
she? I mean, it's the old welcome mat

you when you come in the office.

Cold shoulder for the rest of us, isn't
it? Wayne tried it on this morning.

Nothing doing. I did not try it on, son,
all right? I was just, you know, being

a bit conversational. But once and for
all, right, I'm not expecting anybody,

right? I want a night in on me own,
right? I've ordered two drinks to save

ringing up room service.

You're the pair that's on the pull, so I
suggest you get on with it before your

Swedish birds go off the boil, right?

Yeah, all right.

No offence, Squire.

Oh, Swiss.

I had a bit of fun, didn't I? Yeah,
yeah. OK, no offence.

Anyway, we know you wouldn't be on the
pull because we know how you feel about

your Vera.

You can come out now.

Suppose you heard all that.

Of course.

Well, what can I say?

Is there a drink there?

How did they know about us? They didn't.
They mentioned my name. That was a shot

in the dark.

You said you didn't want them to know
about us. They didn't.

I suppose you don't believe me, eh?

I suppose you picture us all in that
hut, boasting our sexual conquests or

confiding in our fantasies. I don't
blame you. That's what it's like most of

time. Yes, I can just imagine it.

Look, Wayne's remark about you was sheer
speculation. It was just a coincidence.

Another one.

Who is Vera?

She's my wife.

Oh.

Look, look, she would just call it a
day. I mean, she would just forget it.

I came here because I wanted to be with
you.

But I still want to.

You've knocked long enough.

There's no -one there.

Well, they must be in the shower or
something, you know. Together?

Swedes, shouldn't they?

Very liberated, you Swedes, son.

Oh,

my cousin Norma's very liberated, you
know.

She's always walking around the house
stark naked.

I said to her, you know, this is a
council, that's just outside

you know.

I said, I said...

You could lose his house, you could, you
know, flaunting yourself the way you

do. Eric, see, that's her husband. He
don't know because he works nights and

he's not... Shh!

Can you hear something?

So there are they.

I'm so lucky that I'm not so old and
sad.

Did you knock?

No.

Have you ordered more?

No, nothing more. But come on, look. No.

Yes?

About time, too. What have you been
doing, darling? Putting your face on,

What do you think? What do you want to
see? Speak English, darling. It's us.

Come on.

I don't understand anything.

So, Wayne, are you sure that's one of
them, mate? Yeah, of course it is. They

just look a bit different out of
uniform, don't they?

What do you want from our room?

Oh, hello.

We got company, have we?

What's the matter, darling? Ain't we
enough for you girls, eh?

Who, mate? Did you just find your fund
here? Nanny Kennedy, mate.

You sure this is room 612, mate?

Taught it fast.

Hey, hey, listen, mate. You don't have
to pay us for it, yeah? Wayne, Wayne.

Hey, what's going on here, eh? I mean,
we come up here for an innocent liaison,

eh? And I find myself in some depraved
situation with some geezer flashing the

old reddies. What is he, a blimmer or
something, eh? And where's your mate?

They think that we're muggers.

They what?

We're in the wrong room.

They think that we're muggers.

Bloody hell.

No, please.

Why? If he rings the desk, they'll be
waiting in the nether.

What floor is this?

I don't know.

Why? But they can still colour us on the
ground floor. Come on, this way.

Oh, who the hell?

You obviously have much more experience
in this kind of thing than I have.

I'll tell you one thing.

I'm not going on the pool again with
you, mate. Yeah, well, I feel it. Bloody

mutual, sir.

You're a jinx, you are, Barry. You're a
jinx.

Ready?

Swim ready.

Don't break me bleeding leg.

Now, don't be daft, mate. We're fit
enough.

No, we're not. No, we're not.

We might have been if we'd gone jogging
or swimming with Nev. But as you so

despise physical exercise, mate... Leave
it out, Barry, will you?

Not much of a jump.

No. Not for the SAS, maybe. I don't mean
the frigging airline.

Come on.

It's like butchering Sundance.

Oh, we know what happened to them, don't
we? Eh?

Eh?

Ha -ha!

All right?

Eh?

You're harmed, aren't you?

I still feel a little bit as if I had to
look over my shoulder and round every

corner. Yeah, not to worry.

They're happily ensconced in there.

Well, you and me have a quiet dinner,
candlelit, with several bottles of wine.

Put the event of the past firmly behind
us, eh?

Good enough.

One moment, please.

Yeah, what can we do for you?

Your friends were here earlier on.

What about them? You must know who they
are.

Why? Would you come to the manager's
office, please?

Dennis stopped out all night, then?

Must have took my advice, eh?

Oh, yeah? What advice was this, then,
then?

I told him he should have a bit of a
fling.

Good morning, Dennis.

And where have you been, eh?

Oh, maybe we shouldn't ask.

Maybe you shouldn't.

Not that it'll make any difference,
like. I mean, you spread faster than the

plague around here.

What's the problem, then?

Well, ask Abbott and Costello here.

Oh, come on, then.

We was all after the same thing last
night, weren't we? I'd say you were a

more successful than what we was, eh?

Yeah. Look at me ankle.

It's all puffed up. I know all about you
two, man.

I spent an hour in the manager's office
explaining who me guests were.

Oh, dear. Do you mean there were
repercussions?

You could say that, Barry. I mean, it
was you two who terrorised some innocent

couple, wasn't it? You didn't finger us,
did you?

No, no.

Said you were two blokes I'd met in the
bar.

But in future...

You just stay out of my life, right?

Is there something you two haven't told
me?

How are you, Moxie, man?

Oh, yes, hello. I'm out of time to spend
in there. I'm surprised you don't move

in. Hey, I'm not doing it for pleasure,
you know.

It's a little power club.

All right. Hold it.

All right.

Don't forget that.

I'm boxing you, mate, now. Put your name
down for a good Tuesday.

Oh, thanks.

I've got to get out of here, mate.

What's the matter, Nick?

Well, those two pricks, man, Barry and
Wayne, totally destroyed my weekend.

Aye, well, I didn't do their weekend
much good, mate, Nick.

How's that?

Well, I'll tell you all about it.
This'll cheer you up.

Get what?

Tell us what's got into you, man.

Working in the sun, drinking schnapps,
having fun, that's living alright.

to keep you in beer. That's living
alright.

Yeah, you play the game, then it's time
to be the same. That's living alright.

Tell the lie with a glimpse in your eye
that tomorrow you'll be back on the

site.

And you kiss the dames, but you don't
ask their names. That's living alright.

Yeah, you...

And it's our favorite thing, that's me.