Original subtitles

♪ I WROTE MY MOTHER

♪ I WROTE MY FATHER

♪ AND NOW I'M WRITING YOU, TOO

♪ I'M SURE OF MOTHER

♪ I'M SURE OF FATHER

♪ AND NOW I WANNA BE SURE

♪ VERY, VERY SURE OF YOU

♪ DON'T SIT

UNDER THE APPLE TREE ♪

♪ WITH ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ NO, NO, NO

♪ DON'T SIT

UNDER THE APPLE TREE ♪

♪ WITH ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ TILL I COME MARCHING HOME

♪ DON'T GO WALKING

DOWN LOVERS' LANE ♪

♪ WITH ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ NO, NO, NO

- ♪ DON'T GO WALKING - DOWN LOVERS' LANE ♪

♪ WITH ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ TILL I COME MARCHING HOME

♪ I JUST GOT WORD

FROM A GIRL WHO HEARD ♪

♪ FROM THE GIRL

NEXT DOOR TO ME ♪

♪ A BOY SHE MET JUST LOVES...

♪ TILL I COME MARCHING HOME

♪ TILL I COME MARCHING HO...

- GOOD EVENING, - UNCLE DAN.

FRED.

- I WONDER - IF WE COULD TALK FOR A MOMENT.

WELL, I WAS PLANNING

TO GET TO BED EARLY TONIGHT.

THIS WON'T TAKE LONG.

COFFEE?

- I'LL HAVE CHARLES - BRING ANOTHER CUP.

NO, THANKS.

- WELL, NOW, NEPHEW, - WHICH ONE OF YOUR MANY CAUSES

- BRINGS YOU OUT - INTO THE SNOWY NIGHT, HUH?

SOME UBANGIS

WITH THE YAWS?

- SOME PERVERTED MASS MURDERER - WHO'S SEEN THE LIGHT

- AND WISHES TO ASSUME - HIS RIGHTFUL PLACE IN SOCIETY?

AS AN ALTERNATIVE

TO THE ELECTRIC CHAIR.

NO, NO, THAT WAS...

THAT WAS LAST YEAR, WASN'T IT?

WAS IS IT THIS TIME?

A MOVEMENT TO DONATE

THE MISSISSIPPI RIVER

TO THE SAHARA DESERT?

- YOU CAN - DO BETTER THAN THAT.

- NOT ON A FULL STOMACH, - I CAN'T.

NOT BEFORE COFFEE.

I'M HERE

ABOUT ONE OF YOUR CAUSES.

WHAT ABOUT JACK HARRIS?

HARRIS?

JACK HARRIS?

I, UH... I DON'T KNOW

THE FELLA.

PROFESSOR JOHN HARRIS?

YOU KNOW HIM.

- LOOK, FRED, WE USUALLY - WIND UP OUR LITTLE DISCUSSIONS

YELLING AT EACH OTHER.

- NOW, LET'S GET A QUIET START - THIS TIME, ALL RIGHT?

JACK JUST CALLED ME.

- THE UNIVERSITY BOARD OF TRUSTEES - CANCELED HIS CREDENTIALS

FOR THE CULTURAL EXCHANGE

PROGRAM.

- AH, YES, YES, - THAT HARRIS.

- YES, - I-I HEARD THAT DECISION.

IT WAS YOUR DECISION.

- YOU JUST SAID - IT WAS THE TRUSTEES'.

- I'M NOT EVEN - ON THE BOARD.

- THE WORDS WERE THEIRS, - BUT THE VOICE BELONGED

- TO A HIGH-POWERED VENTRILOQUIST - NAMED DANIEL GRUDGE.

YOU SIT HERE AT THAT DESK,

- THROW YOUR VOICE THROUGH - A TELEPHONE, EVERYBODY JUMPS...

BANKERS, POLITICIANS,

NEWSPAPERS, UNIVERSITIES.

THIS COFFEE IS COLD.

- NOW, WHY SHOULD - A LITTLE THING LIKE THIS

- SIT SO HEAVILY - IN YOUR TENDER TUMMY, FRED?

"LITTLE THING"?

- UNCLE DAN, YOU KNOW - WHAT THIS PROJECT HAS MEANT

TO ALL OF US ON THE FACULTY,

TO THE WHOLE UNIVERSITY.

EVERYTHING FROM THE RAISING

OF OUR OWN PEDAGOGICAL STANDARDS

- TO INTERNATIONAL RECOGNITION - TO...

- WE'VE WORKED ON IT - FOR AN ENTIRE YEAR.

- IT'S BEEN CLEARED BY WASHINGTON, - CLEARED BY THE OTHER END,

- AND NOW YOU COME ALONG - TO DUMP IT ALL.

WHY?

- WHY SHOULD YOU OBJECT - IF ONE OF OUR PROFESSORS

- SPENDS A YEAR - STUDYING AND TEACHING ABROAD?

YES, ABROAD.

POLAND, WASN'T IT?

YOUR PROFESSOR HARRIS

WAS TO SPEND A YEAR IN POLAND

AT THE UNIVERSITY OF KRAKOW,

WAS IT NOT?

- STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS - YOU KNOW THE ANSWERS TO.

WOULD YOU CARE

FOR A DRINK?

NO, THANKS.

AND IN EXCHANGE

FOR OUR PROFESSOR HARRIS,

- THE UNIVERSITY OF KRAKOW - IN POLAND

WOULD SEND TO OUR UNIVERSITY

ONE OF THEIR BOYS,

- WHOSE NAME, - EVEN IF I KNEW WHAT IT WAS,

- IS PROBABLY - UNPRONOUNCEABLE.

KORZENIOWSKI.

- IT'S REALLY - QUITE EASILY PRONOUNCED.

THAT'S WHAT'S KNOWN THESE DAYS

AS A "CULTURAL EXCHANGE."

- YOU KNOW, FRED, FOR A FAIRLY - TALENTED PROFESSOR OF HISTORY,

- YOU SEEM TO BE - A LITTLE NAIVE

AS TO THE CURRENT POLITICAL

CLIMATE OF THE NATIVE COUNTRY

- OF THIS - PROFESSOR WHATEVER-HIS-NAME-IS.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS

YOU KNOW THE ANSWERS TO, NEPHEW.

- DO YOU KNOW - WHAT HE TEACHES?

- DO YOU KNOW WHAT KORZENIOWSKI - AND HARRIS BOTH TEACH?

- 18th-CENTURY - EUROPEAN LITERATURE.

- WHAT'S THAT GOT TO DO - WITH POLITICS?

I DON'T KNOW.

AND I'M NOT INTERESTED

IN FINDING OUT.

GET SMART, BOY.

- WE'VE BEEN DIGGING HIS KIND - OUT OF THE WOODWORK FOR YEARS.

- YOU DON'T REALLY EXPECT ME - TO BE A PARTY

TO INVITING ONE OF THEM

IN HERE, NOW, DO YOU?

OH, NO.

- NO, HE STAYS - ON HIS SIDE OF THE FENCE,

AND HARRIS STAYS ON OURS.

GET USED TO THE IDEA.

- WHEN YOU FINALLY GO, THAT'LL BE - YOUR EPITAPH, WON'T IT?

"HERE LIES DANIEL GRUDGE,

ON HIS SIDE OF THE FENCE."

WELL, GET USED TO THIS IDEA,

UNCLE.

THERE ARE CERTAIN FENCES

THE WORLD CAN NO LONGER AFFORD.

QUITE A WALL THROUGH BERLIN,

I'VE HEARD TELL.

EXACTLY. A FENCE.

- AND WHO PUT IT THERE? - YOU THINK IT'S RIGHT?

ALL RIGHT, FRED.

TURN IT OFF.

RIGHT NOW.

THERE'S ONLY ONE SIDE I'M ON...

FIRST, LAST, AND ALWAYS...

OUR SIDE.

- DON'T YOU EVER - FORGET THAT.

AND SPREAD IT AROUND.

I WANT ALL THE MEMBERS

OF YOUR VARIOUS DOMESTIC

- AND INTERNATIONAL ORDERS - OF THE BLEEDING HEART

TO KNOW PRECISELY

WHERE DANIEL GRUDGE STANDS.

BECAUSE ANY TIME YOU

AND/OR ONE

OF YOUR FUZZY FELLOW DO-GOODERS

TRIES TO GET ME,

OR FRIENDS OF MINE,

OR MY CITY, STATE,

OR MY COUNTRY, INVOLVED

- IN ANY - OF YOUR SO-CALLED CAUSES,

- THEN I INTEND - TO BE THERE EVERY TIME

- WITH A BODY BLOCK - THAT'LL THROW ALL OF YOU

FLAT

ON YOUR INVOLVED BUTTS.

NOW, GET OUT.

- MERRY CHRISTMAS, - BY THE WAY.

YEAH, SO IT IS.

AND TONIGHT,

ESPECIALLY TONIGHT,

I'M IN NO MOOD

FOR THE BROTHERHOOD OF MAN.

DO YOU MIND?

I'VE HEARD THAT SPEECH.

AND HEARD IT.

- OH, I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU, - FRED.

- WITH ALL OF YOU, I'VE HAD IT, - RIGHT UP TO HERE.

MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.

AND LET EVERYBODY ELSE

MIND THEIRS.

YOUR RESPONSIBILITY

HAPPENS TO BE YOUR CLASSROOM,

- NOT CLASSROOMS IN KRAKOW, - POLAND; BUTTE, MONTANA;

OR JOHANNESBURG,

SOUTH AFRICA.

DO YOU INSIST

UPON MAKING IT A BETTER WORLD?

- WON'T YOU DIE HAPPY - UNTIL YOU DO?

DO YOU INSIST UPON

HELPING THE NEEDY AND OPPRESSED?

IS THAT SOME KIND OF AN ITCH

THAT YOU CAN'T STOP SCRATCHING?

- THEN TELL THEM - TO HELP THEMSELVES.

LET THEM KNOW

THE CASH DRAWER IS CLOSED

AND MAKE THEM BELIEVE IT.

- YOU'LL BE SURPRISED HOW MUCH - LESS NEEDY AND OPPRESSED

THE NEEDY AND OPPRESSED

TURN OUT TO BE.

- BUT YOU'VE HEARD - THAT ONE BEFORE.

AND HEARD IT.

NO, I CAN'T CHANGE YOU,

AND YOU CAN'T CHANGE ME.

SO JUST STAY

OUT OF MY WAY, FRED,

OUT OF MY HOUSE,

AND OUT OF MY LIFE.

UNCLE DAN.

UNCLE DAN,

THIS IS CHRISTMAS EVE,

A VERY SPECIAL NIGHT,

APART FROM EVERYTHING ELSE,

FOR YOU AND FOR ME.

ALL MY LIFE, WE'VE DISAGREED

ABOUT MOST THINGS, YOU AND I,

BUT THERE'S ONE THING

WE BOTH HAVE IN COMMON,

SOMEONE WE CARED

THE WORLD ABOUT...

YOUR SON...

MY COUSIN, MARLEY.

MAY I HAVE

THAT DRINK NOW?

- THE ONE SOLITARY THING - ON THIS EARTH

THAT I CARED

ANYTHING AT ALL FOR.

AND TO WHAT END?

- SO THAT HIS LIFE - COULD BE SNUFFED OUT?

HIS FINE YOUNG BODY TURNED INTO

A BUNDLE OF BLEEDING GARBAGE,

IN RETURN FOR WHICH,

I'M SENT HIS DOG TAGS,

- SOME MEDALS, - AND A 12-WORD TELEGRAM?

SOMETHING FOR SOMETHING.

I GIVE THEM A SON,

AND THEY GIVE ME BACK

HIS EFFECTS.

THAT, I SUBMIT TO YOU,

IS A LOUSY BARGAIN.

NOBODY COULD ARGUE THAT.

THE POINT IS

- THAT KIND OF BARGAINING - HAS GOT TO STOP.

OH.

AND WHO'S GONNA STOP IT?

ARMIES OF PROFESSIONAL

PLEA COPPERS, LIKE YOU?

YOUR KIND MOUTH THE PLATITUDES

THAT GET US INTO WAR.

HIS KIND

GO OFF TO FIGHT THEM.

- YOU MIGHT - RAISE THAT POINT

- WITH ONE - OF YOUR DEBATING SOCIETIES.

THE POINT THAT,

EVERY TWO DECADES,

- WE SEEM TO PAY FOR - YOUR INDISCRIMINATE AFFECTIONS

- WITH THE LIVES - OF OUR SONS.

- THOSE INDISCRIMINATE AFFECTIONS, - AS YOU PUT IT,

- IS SIMPLY THE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT - THAT ALL MEN HAVE SONS,

THAT GRIEF

FOR THE UNNECESSARY DEAD

- IS NOT EXCLUSIVE - TO THIS COUNTRY, THIS TOWN,

OR TO THE HOUSE OF GRUDGE.

MINE IS EXCLUSIVE.

IT CONCERNS ME.

FORGIVE ME, UNCLE DAN,

- BUT I FEEL - YOU MOURN THE DEATH OF MARLEY

- LESS THAN YOU MOURN - YOUR PERSONAL LOSS OF HIM.

YOU KEEP HIS ROOM

LIKE A SHRINE.

- YOU SET A PLACE FOR HIM - AT DINNER EACH CHRISTMAS EVE

BECAUSE HE DIED

ON CHRISTMAS EVE.

- THOSE THINGS ARE FOR YOU, - NOT FOR HIM.

- WHO CARES - WHO THEY'RE FOR?

- I'M THE ONE - WHO FEELS THE PAIN.

AND YOU'LL GO ON FEELING IT,

NURSING IT EVEN,

UNTIL YOU REALIZE

THE TRUE TRAGEDY,

THE TRAGIC INSANITY

OF MARLEY'S DEATH.

NOT THAT YOUR SON WAS KILLED

BY ANOTHER MAN'S SON,

BUT THAT MANKIND STILL ALLOWS

SUCH DYING TO HAPPEN.

IT WASN'T HIS WAR.

NO WAR IS ANYBODY'S WAR!

- I'M NOT TALKING - ABOUT ANYBODY.

HOW DO WE STAY OUT?

- BY GETTING OURSELVES INVOLVED - WITH THE SAME PEOPLE,

- THE SAME PROBLEMS, - THE SAME PLACES?

NONE OF THEM OUR BUSINESS?

- IS THAT YOUR ANSWER? - INVOLVEMENT?

A HOPHEAD'S PIPE DREAM

IN WHICH EVERYBODY...

YELLOW, BLACK, AND WHITE...

GETS THROWN INTO ONE POT,

AND OUT COMES A STEW

CALLED WORLD BROTHERHOOD,

WHICH MANKIND LIVES FOREVER

IN... IN PEACE AND PUTREFACTION.

IS THAT YOUR ANSWER?

NO, NOT EVEN CLOSE.

- BUT IT'S THE WAY - YOU KEEP PUTTING IT.

- MAYBE - FOR SOME VERY PRIVATE REASON,

YOU HAVE TO KEEP TELLING IT

TO YOURSELF THAT WAY.

AT ANY RATE, AS YOU SAID,

I SURE COULDN'T CHANGE YOU.

THANKS FOR THE DRINK.

- AND I HAVE A CHRISTMAS PRESENT - FOR YOU, FRED.

- CALL IT A CONTRIBUTION, - IF YOU LIKE,

TO ALL YOUR CAUSES,

INVOLVEMENTS, EXCHANGES,

CULTURAL AND OTHERWISE,

WHATEVER TERMS YOU APPLY

TO INTERNATIONAL FREELOADING

ON OUR POCKETBOOK.

- IF YOU HAVE - THIS OVERPOWERING CONCERN

- FOR EVERYBODY EVERYWHERE IN - THE WORLD, HERE'S YOUR ANSWER.

- JUST YOU PUT - YOUR EFFORT, SWEAT, AND FAITH

- INTO DEVELOPING - THE FASTEST BOMBERS

- AND THE MOST POWERFUL MISSILES - ON EARTH.

- THEY'LL PROVIDE A LOT MORE - SECURITY FOR OUR YOUNG

AND FOR THE REST

OF THE WORLD'S YOUNG,

THAN ALL YOUR DEBATING

SOCIETIES, FORUMS, TREATIES,

- PACTS, AND OTHER FORMS - OF SURRENDER AND HANDOUT.

THAT'S QUITE AN ANSWER,

UNCLE DAN, FOR TODAY.

BUT WHAT ABOUT TOMORROW?

- OF COURSE, YOU'LL GRANT - ALL OTHER NATIONS AN EQUAL RIGHT

TO PUT THEIR FAITH

AND SWEAT AND EFFORT

- IN TRYING - TO MAKE THEIR BOMBS

- FASTER AND MORE POWERFUL - THAN OURS.

JUST LET THEM TRY IT.

EACH BEHIND ITS OWN FENCE.

EACH CAPABLE, EVENTUALLY,

OF DESTROYING EVERYTHING

AND EVERYBODY ELSE.

AND EACH UNINVOLVED

WITH THE OTHER.

UNINVOLVED WITH US?

I'LL SETTLE FOR THAT.

- JUST LET THEM KNOW WE HAVE - THE BIGGEST AND THE FASTEST.

- JUST LET THEM KNOW WE'RE NOT - TOO CHICKEN TO USE THEM.

PEACE ON EARTH,

GOODWILL TO MEN.

TO ALL MEN, BY THE WAY.

Daniel: MARLEY?

MARLEY?

- ♪ DON'T SIT - UNDER THE APPLE TREE ♪

♪ WITH ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ NO, NO, NO

- ♪ DON'T SIT - UNDER THE APPLE TREE ♪

♪ WITH ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ TILL I COME MARCHING HOME

♪ DON'T GO WALKING DOWN...

DO YOU HEAR ANYTHING?

SIR?

- I ASKED YOU, - DID YOU HEAR ANYTHING?

LIKE WHAT, SIR?

♪ ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ NO, NO, NO

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT,

SIR?

♪ WITH ANYONE ELSE BUT ME

♪ TILL I COME MARCHING HOME

♪ I JUST GOT WORD

FROM A GIRL WHO HEARD ♪

♪ FROM THE GIRL

NEXT DOOR TO ME ♪

♪ THE BOY SHE MET

JUST LOVES TO PET ♪

♪ AND IT FITS YOU TO A "T"

♪ SO DON'T SIT UNDER THE...

- HEY, WHAT DO YA SAY, - CHIEF?

YOU'RE GRUDGE, HUH?

DANIEL GRUDGE, RIGHT?

WHERE, UH...

WHAT IS THIS,

SOME KIND OF A TROOP TRANSPORT?

YEAH,

YOU MIGHT CALL IT THAT.

ON ITS WAY.

FROM FRANCE?

ONE OF OUR STOPS.

WELL, WHERE ELSE?

YOU NAME IT.

MEET THE TROOPS.

THEY'RE DEAD.

KILLED IN ACTION.

CHATEAU-THIERRY,

BELLEAU WOOD, THE MARNE.

- HOW YOU GONNA KEEP THEM DOWN - ON THE FARM

AFTER THEY'VE SEEN PARIS?

THEY SAW PARIS...

VERY BRIEFLY.

LAFAYETTE...

THEY WERE THERE.

YOU TALK LIKE THE A.E.F.

WHAT'S YOUR NAME?

I'M ALL THE A.E.F.s.

ALSO B.E.F.s,

THE POILUS,

THE HUNS, THE RUSSKIES,

ET CETERA.

GALLIPOLI, THE CRIMEA,

EVEN WATERLOO,

- IF YOU CARE - TO GO BACK THAT FAR.

- YOU GET THE PICTURE, - CHIEF?

I'M ALL OF THEM.

- I'M THE ONE WHO RALLIED - AROUND THE FLAG,

ANY FLAG, ALL FLAGS.

SEE WHAT I MEAN?

YEAH.

YEAH, NO NAMES

AND ALL NAMES, HUH?

YOU KNOW,

I HAVEN'T HEARD THAT ONE

- SINCE THE RADIO PROGRAMS - IN THE '30s.

YOUR NAME IS

JOE, TONY, IZZY, PAT...

ALL ONE AND THE SAME.

- AMERICA THE MELTING POT, - RIGHT?

WRONG.

I'M NOT GETTING ACROSS TO YOU.

I CAN SEE THAT.

WHO SAID ONLY AMERICA,

SPORT?

I'M THE DEAD,

ALL THE DEAD.

WE'RE QUITE A STEW,

YOU'LL HAVE TO ADMIT.

STILL, NAMELESS AS I AM,

I'VE GOT A TERRIFIC TITLE...

THE GHOST

OF CHRISTMAS PAST.

HOW'S THAT HIT YA?

IT DOESN'T.

NO, I DON'T LOOK

LIKE A GHOST, HUH?

DO YOU WANT

TO MAKE YOUR POINT?

IT'S DAMP OUT HERE,

AND I'M UNCOMFORTABLE.

UNCOMFORTABLE?

YOU, CHIEF?

- WHY, I'VE BEEN GIVEN TO - UNDERSTAND YOU WERE AN OLD SALT.

THAT WAS 20 YEARS AGO

WHEN I WAS IN THE NAVY.

- I'M AFRAID - YOU STILL DON'T COMPRENEZ-VOUS.

NOT 20 YEARS AGO.

20 YEARS FROM NOW.

THIS IS 1918. CAPICHE?

IT WAS A LONG WAR

FOR SOME OF THESE BOYS.

AND SHORT FOR SOME.

AND A SHORT LIFE FOR OURS.

WHICH ONES WERE YOURS?

CAN YOU PICK THEM OUT?

WE DIDN'T BELONG

IN THAT ONE, EITHER.

- "MADE THE WORLD - SAFE FOR DEMOCRACY," DID THEY?

- THAT'S - WHAT THEY WERE TOLD.

THEY SURE AS HELL

GAVE IT A TRY.

LOOK, THEY CHANGE THE HATS,

THEY UPDATE THE SLOGANS,

- BUT IT'S - THE SAME OLD SHELL GAME.

LIKE CLOCKWORK.

EVERY 20 YEARS, SOMEBODY RINGS

A FIRE BELL 10,000 MILES AWAY,

AND OUT COMES UNCLE SAM'S

EXPEDITIONARY SUCKER BRIGADE.

IS THAT WHAT THEY ARE?

SUCKERS?

- IS THAT - WHAT YOUR SON'S GONNA BE?

MY SO...

MY SON?

MY SON WILL BE A VICTIM,

- JUST AS THESE MEN - ARE OUR VICTIMS

OF SOMEBODY ELSE'S WAR.

YOU KILL ME, CHIEF.

YOU REALLY DO.

- IF IT ISN'T VALLEY FORGE - OR THE BOSTON TEA PARTY,

YOU LEAVE IT

STRICTLY ALONE.

YOUR BIG GRIPE IS WHAT?

'CAUSE EVERY 20 YEARS,

- AMERICAN BOYS GOT - TO CLIMB ON TROOP SHIPS

- AND HEAD OUT - FOR SOMEPLACE ELSE?

IT RUBS YOU RAW.

SO WHAT ELSE IS NEW?

60,000 LIMEYS

DIE IN FLANDERS.

100,000 FROGS

CATCH IT AT VERDUN.

THE GERMANS MARCH

THROUGH BELGIUM,

AND AUSTRIA DECLARES WAR

ON JAPAN, BUT WHO CARES?

IT'S A NICE SUMMER.

BOSTON'S GONNA WIN

THE WORLD SERIES.

SO WE'LL ROCK ON THE FRONT PORCH

AND SWAT FLIES.

DO I TRANSLATE YOU RIGHT,

CHIEF?

- BETTER - THAN AMERICAN BLOOD.

- INFINITELY BETTER - THAN AMERICAN BLOOD.

AMEN, I GRANT YOU.

IF IT WERE POSSIBLE.

BUT IT AIN'T POSSIBLE.

WAR IS ALSO

A CONTAGIOUS DISEASE, MR. G.

- AND UNTIL WE CAN STAMP IT OUT - ENTIR...

- NOBODY... NOBODY EVER FOUND - A WAY TO DO THAT.

RIGHT.

- BUT IS THAT ANY REASON - TO STOP TRYING?

ONE THING WE DO KNOW...

THE ONLY CHANCE TO KEEP

- THIS PARTICULAR DISEASE - FROM SPREADING

IS TO KEEP TALKING.

SO LONG AS YOU TALK,

YOU DON'T FIGHT.

SIMPLE?

- LOOK, - I BUMP A GUY ON A STREET.

HE BUMPS ME.

- WE STAND THERE. - WE ARGUE.

HE GIVES ME LIP.

I GIVE HIM LIP.

BUT WHEN WE STOP TALKING,

WE START SWINGING,

AND THEN WE BLEED.

THEN WE GOT PROBLEMS,

LIKE... WINDING UP DEAD.

I RECOGNIZE THE COMMERCIAL,

BUT IT'S NO SALE.

OH, I'M NOT SELLING YA,

PAL.

- I'M DONATING TO YOU, - FREE OF CHARGE.

REMEMBER THE...

EXCUSE THE EXPRESSION...

LEAGUE OF NATIONS, SPORT?

- THAT WAS GONNA BE - THE POINT THERE, REMEMBER?

- I WOULD HAVE BEEN OPPOSED - TO THE LEAGUE OF NATIONS.

OF COURSE YOU WOULD.

AND YOU WERE,

SO YOU BLEW IT.

- A BUNCH OF FANCY CHARACTERS - WITH TOP HATS AND MONOCLES.

- "WE'RE NOT BUYING ANY OF THAT, - RIGHT, MR. G? NO SALE."

- WE'VE HAD IT - WITH FOREIGNERS.

WE'VE HAD IT WITH...

- WITH "MAKING THE WORLD - SAFE FOR DEMOCRACY"

AND THE REST

OF THE SLOGANS.

SO WE TELL THEM TO DRIFT.

- WE'RE SITTING - THIS ONE OUT.

THAT'S HOW YOU KEEP WARS

FROM HAPPENING, RIGHT, GRUDGE?

DON'T GET INVOLVED,

RIGHT?

WELL, IS IT?

TELL THEM.

THEY'D LIKE TO KNOW.

- WASN'T THAT HOW YOU KEPT THE - WORLD FROM A SECOND WORLD WAR?

UNINVOLVEMENT,

STAY ISOLATED?

- WASN'T THAT HOW? - WELL, TELL THEM!

- WELL, OBVIOUSLY, - IF WE HADN'T BECOME INVOLVED,

WHY, THEY WOULDN'T BE HERE.

NO, THEY... THEY

WOULDN'T BE HERE.

THEY'D BE BACK

IN THEIR HOMETOWNS.

WHAT WAS LEFT OF THEM.

BURIED,

RIGHT WHERE THEY FELL.

ANOTHER SHIP?

ALSO ON HER WAY.

- I CAN - JUST MAKE OUT THE DECK.

THOSE ARE AMERICAN SOLDIERS

FROM MY WAR.

NICELY PUT, CHIEF.

THEY'RE THE SONS.

THESE ARE THE FATHERS.

YEAH, AFTER 1918,

WE GOT SICK OF WAR, FED UP.

ALL THOSE AMERICAN KIDS

GETTING BLOWN TO PIECES,

OUT OF SIGHT IN FOREIGN PLACES

WITH STRANGE-SOUNDING NAMES.

SO FOR THE NEXT 20 YEARS,

WE CLOSED OUR EYES

AND DECIDED WHAT WE COULDN'T SEE

WOULDN'T HAPPEN, RIGHT?

- 'COURSE, WE DON'T WANT - TO TAKE ALL THE CREDIT, DO WE?

I MEAN, WE WEREN'T

THE ONLY ONES PLAYING SHUT-EYE.

WHEN OLD ADOLF WALKED

INTO THE RHINELAND,

FRANCE DIDN'T WANT

TO GET INVOLVED.

ITALY PULLED DOWN A WINDOW SHADE

WHEN HITLER TOOK AUSTRIA.

- ENGLAND WASN'T ABOUT - TO INVOLVE HERSELF

- WHEN CZECHOSLOVAKIA - WENT UNDER.

- AND RUSSIA KEPT THE PHONE - OFF THE HOOK

WHILE POLAND WAS DESTROYED.

AND BEFORE YOU KNEW IT,

EVERYBODY WAS SINGING,

"DON'T ROCK THE BOAT"

WHILE IT SANK SLOWLY

TO THE BOTTOM.

SO, THEY DIED

AT OTHER PLACES ON OTHER DATES.

- DON'T YOU TELL ME - YOU'RE NOT SELLING ANYTHING.

NOW, YOU LISTEN TO ME.

NOBODY... NOBODY, MORTAL MAN

OR DRESSED-UP GHOST,

- CAN CONVINCE ME - THAT EVERY TIME THERE'S A WAR,

- WE HAVE TO STEP IN - AND FINISH IT.

NOW, YOU LISTEN TO THIS.

THE NEXT ONE... THE NEXT ONE,

WE DON'T BRING UP THE BUCKET.

WE STAY HOME.

WE STAY ON OUR...

OUR SIDE OF THE FENCE.

- TALK ABOUT - YOUR OLD-TIME RADIO SHOWS.

SEEMS TO ME,

I HEARD THAT ONE BEFORE, TOO.

- HEY, YOU WANT - TO KNOW SOMETHING, PAL?

THAT OCEAN YOU CALL A FENCE

KEEPS NOTHING OUT ANYMORE...

EXCEPT FISH.

- IT'S A LOUSY STREAM - OF WATER NOW.

IT'S ABOUT AS WIDE

AS A DITCH.

A COUPLE OF SUPERSONIC BOMBERS

CAN SPIT OVER IT.

- AN ICBM - WILL LEAVE IT BEHIND.

- YOU DON'T WANT - TO GET INVOLVED.

SPORT, YOU GOT

A JOB AHEAD OF YOU.

YOU REALLY GOT A JOB.

- YOU GOT TO DISINVENT - THE AIRPLANE AND THE MISSILE

AND THE SUBMARINE AND A LITTE

OLD THING CALLED THE BOMB.

IT.

SEE WHAT I MEAN?

- YOU DON'T WANT - TO GET INVOLVED,

- YOU GOT TO GIVE BACK - THE 20th CENTURY,

- IF YOU CAN - FIND A CHUMP TO TAKE IT.

BUT ISOLATION?

I GOT NEWS.

- THAT WENT OUT WITH GAS LIGHT - AND 50-CENT STEAKS.

IT'S FOR THE DINOSAURS,

ISOLATION.

- AND CLOSING YOUR EYES... - THAT'S FOR SLEEPING.

ALSO AT CERTAIN TIMES,

IT... IT LEADS TO DYING.

CONVOY.

HUNDREDS OF SHIPS,

THOUSANDS OF SHIPS.

LOADED WITH BOXES,

CHIEF.

CHINA, ETHIOPIA,

SPAIN, LATVIA, HUNGARY.

UNDECLARED WARS,

POLICE ACTIONS.

SOME MINOR-LEAGUE

INSURRECTIONS.

ALL THE WAY BACK, CHIEF.

- ALL THE WAY BACK - AS FAR AS ANYONE CAN REMEMBER...

AND STILL FARTHER.

BUT IT ALL BOILS DOWN

TO SOMEBODY STOPPED TALKING...

SO THEY FOUGHT...

SO THEY BLED...

SO THEY DIED.

- HEY, WOULDN'T YOU THINK, - SPORT...

- WITH ALL THE BRAINS - WE GOT ON THIS EARTH,

THE WAY WE BUILD THINGS

AND CURE THINGS,

AND INVENT STUFF ON TUESDAY THAT

WASN'T POSSIBLE ON MONDAY...

- WOULDN'T YOU THINK - WE COULD COME UP WITH SOMETHING

THAT COULD KEEP A KID FROM

GETTING KILLED AT THE AGE OF 18?

Daniel: GHOST?

SIR?

WHERE DO THEY GO?

THE SHIPS, I MEAN.

WHERE DO THEY GO?

NOWHERES.

LIKE I SAID,

JUST ON THEIR WAY.

WHY, MR. GRUDGE?

YOU... YOU WANT

TO THROW A WREATH OR SOMETHING?

- WE'VE REACHED - YOUR PORT, MR. GRUDGE.

THIS IS

WHERE WE GET OFF.

IN HERE.

WHAT'S IN THERE?

A PLACE

YOU SHOULD REMEMBER.

A PLACE...

A FOREIGN PLACE

- YOU HAD A FEELING ABOUT - ONE TIME.

I DOUBT IT.

DO YOU, CHIEF?

- WELL, MAYBE YOU - JUST DON'T REMEMBER TOO GOOD.

NOT ONLY WHERE YOU'VE BEEN,

EVEN WHAT YOU SAY, LIKE,

"LET THEM KNOW WE'RE NOT

TOO CHICKEN TO USE THAT BOMB."

THEY ALREADY KNOW THAT,

MR. GRUDGE.

- DO YOU REMEMBER ANY BETTER, - GRUDGE?

HIROSHIMA, RIGHT?

HIROSHIMA.

I WAS HERE

IN SEPTEMBER 1945.

I WAS OFF MY SHIP.

I CAME HERE.

- OF COURSE, THIS IS - ONLY YOUR MEMORY OF IT.

IT WASN'T QUITE AS CLEAN

AS YOU REMEMBER.

WELL,

THEY DID QUITE A JOB.

THEY CLEARED AWAY ALL THE DEAD

REAL QUICK.

THEY ONLY LEFT

THE... SILENCE.

- YOU RECOGNIZE THE OFFICER, - CHIEF?

[ GIRL SINGING IN JAPANESE

WHY, IT'S ME.

IT'S ME 20 YEARS AGO.

IT'S ME WHEN I CAME HERE

THAT AFTERNOON.

THE DAFFY TRICKS

MEMORY PLAYS.

SOME THINGS WE THINK

WE FORGOT... WE ONLY MISPLACED.

WOULD YOU LIKE

TO GET OUT HERE, SIR?

Daniel: GOOD MORNING.

DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?

YES, COMMANDER, I DO.

GRUDGE IS MY NAME.

MY CRUISE IS IN YOKOHAMA.

- THIS IS - LIEUTENANT GIBSON.

- SHE'S ATTACHED - TO OUR HEADQUARTERS THERE.

TELL ME, DOCTOR,

WHO HAS THAT LOVELY VOICE?

THAT IS SACHIKO.

IT MEANS

"CHILD OF HAPPINESS."

SACHIKO.

DOCTOR, WAS SHE...

- SHE WAS ONE OF THE GROUP - OF SCHOOLGIRLS.

THEY WERE CLEARING AWAY

FIRE LANES WHEN THE BOMB FELL.

- WOULD YOU CARE - TO MEET THEM?

THEY'RE VERY LONELY HERE.

THEY ENJOY COMPANY.

THANK YOU.

I MUST TELL YOU THAT WHEN

THE PLANE FLEW OVERHEAD,

THESE CHILDREN LOOKED

UP AT THE SKY.

THEIR FACES WERE UPTURNED

TO THE BLAST.

THEY SUFFERED

WHAT WE CALL FLASH BURNS.

- IT IS A TERM - WE USE TO DESCRIBE

INSTANTANEOUS

THERMAL RADIATION.

- HOW BADLY - WERE THEY BURNED?

- THEY HAVE NO MORE FACES, - COMMANDER.

- I TOLD THE YOUNG LADIES THAT - YOU'RE AMERICAN NAVAL OFFICERS,

AND YOU'VE COME

TO... TO WISH THEM WELL.

- UH, DOCTOR, I-I KNOW - IT'S NOT MUCH CONSOLATION,

- BUT AT LEAST WE CAN HOPE - THAT THEIR CHILDREN WILL...

CHILDREN, COMMANDER?

THESE GIRLS?

EXCUSE ME.

LIEUTENANT?

SIR.

NEVER SEEN

A BURN CASE BEFORE?

SEVERAL TIMES, SIR.

I WAS AT

THE BETHESDA NAVAL HOSPITAL.

I WAS THERE AFTER CORAL SEA,

AFTER MIDWAY, AFTER SAMAR.

I SAW

A LOT OF BURN CASES.

AND WHEN YOU SAW THEM,

DID YOU RUN?

THE BURN CASES I SAW WERE

AMERICAN SAILORS, COMMANDER.

- THEY HAD BEEN - FIGHTING AN ENEMY.

- THEY WEREN'T - SCHOOLCHILDREN.

THE DISTINCTION

IS MOST SUBTLE, SIR.

I'LL GIVE YOU THAT.

BUT, MY GOD,

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE.

- WHAT ABOUT THE KIDS - AT PEARL HARBOR

- WHO LOOKED - UP TOWARD THE SKY?

OR MALAYAN KIDS?

OR CHINESE KIDS?

- SYMPATHIZE ALL YOU WANT, - LIEUTENANT,

- BUT KEEP - YOUR PERSPECTIVE.

- THE PRESIDENT - OF THE UNITED STATES

- FOUND IT NECESSARY - TO DROP THAT BOMB

- BECAUSE THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN - 500,000 AMERICAN CASUALTIES

AND A COUPLE OF MILLION JAPANESE

DEAD HAD HE NOT DROPPED IT.

HARSH AS IT MAY SOUND,

- IN MY BOOK, - THAT MAKES SIMPLE ARITHMETIC.

COMMANDER, I WOULDN'T DEBATE

MILITARY PLANNING WITH YOU.

- I'M JUST SUGGESTING - THAT WE ARE STANDING

IN THE MIDDLE

OF WHAT WAS ONCE A CITY

WHERE, ON ONE GIVEN MORNING,

100,000 PEOPLE WERE KILLED.

PEOPLE, COMMANDER.

- THAT'S ALMOST - AS MANY DEATHS

AS THE CONFEDERATES HAD

IN FOUR YEARS OF CIVIL WAR.

QUITE APART

FROM ANYTHING ELSE, SIR,

DOESN'T THAT SUGGEST TO YOU

THAT, FROM THIS SECOND ON,

IF THE WORLD EVER DECIDED

TO GO TO WAR AGAIN,

IT COULD KILL ITSELF OFF

IN A COUPLE OF AFTERNOONS?

DOESN'T IT SUGGEST, SIR,

THAT... MAYBE...

MAYBE WAR IS OBSOLETE NOW?

JUST... JUST DO ME ONE FAVOR,

WOULD YOU PLEASE, COMMANDER?

DON'T CALL IT ARITHMETIC

ANYMORE.

FUJIKO?

KOSHIKO?

Doctor: THAT'S KOU.

KOSHIKO AND FUJIKO

WERE HIS SISTERS.

- THAT'S WHERE THEY WERE - THAT MORNING.

WHENEVER THERE'S THUNDER NOW,

THEY ALWAYS REMEMBER.

DEAR GOD.

LOOK, SON,

YOU TAKE IT EASY, HUH?

EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE

ALL RIGHT.

YOU UNDERSTAND ME, HUH?

IT'S JUST

A LITTLE THUNDER.

- COME ON. - GIVE ME A SMILE.

COME ON. LITTLE MORE.

ATTABOY.

THANK YOU.

"IF THINE ENEMY BE HUNGRY,

GIVE HIM BREAD TO EAT.

IF HE BE THIRSTY,

GIVE HIM WATER TO DRINK."

YOUR ENEMY THANKS YOU,

COMMANDER.

IT'S STARTING TO RAIN,

MR. GRUDGE.

I REMEMBER THE RAIN.

A YELLOW CHILD IS A BLACK CHILD

IS A WHITE CHILD IS A CHILD.

CAN WE AGREE

TO THAT MUCH?

WHERE TO NOW?

THROUGH THERE,

MR. GRUDGE.

OH, I'VE BEEN THERE.

THIS TIME,

IT'S... IT'S ANOTHER PLACE,

LIKE EVERY PLACE

IS ANOTHER PLACE.

ARE YOU COMING WITH ME?

NO, SIR.

I'M THEN.

IN THERE IS NOW.

GRUDGE, ISN'T IT?

DANIEL GRUDGE!

- JOIN ME IN A SNACK, - WON'T YOU?

POTLUCK, I'M AFRAID.

THIS TABLE,

MY CHANDELIER.

- YOU HAVE - AN EYE FOR POSSESSIONS.

GLAD TO SEE IT.

LITTLE TURKEY, MR. GRUDGE?

DRUMSTICK, WING?

BAKED HAM, PERHAPS?

CANDIED YAMS,

SUCKLING PIG?

- I FIND MYSELF - OVEREATING AT CHRISTMAS.

THANKSGIVING, TOO.

- A TRADITION OF OVEREATING, - AS IT WERE.

- YOU DON'T MAKE SENSE - TO ME.

MY APOLOGIES, MR. GRUDGE.

I THOUGHT YOU KNEW.

- I'M THE GHOST - OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT.

- REPRESENTING WHAT, - GLUTTONY?

IF YOU LIKE.

NO, I-I REPRESENT

THE HUMAN RACE, MR. GRUDGE.

- SO, TO A CERTAIN EXTENT, - DOES GLUTTONY.

ALSO STARVATION...

I REPRESENT THAT, TOO.

- YOU MIGHT SAY - THAT I'M AS CLOSE

TO BEING A WALKING, EATING IMAGE

OF THE HUMAN RACE

AS IT'S POSSIBLE

FOR A MAN OR A PHANTOM TO BE.

PART OF ME

FEELS A GNAWING HUNGER.

PART OF ME IS SATIATED.

I'M WARM,

CONTENTED, HEALTHY,

- BUT MUCH OF ME - SHIVERS IN THE COLD.

NOW I UNDERSTAND.

- THIS IS - WHERE I GET MY LECTURE

- ABOUT THE HAVES - AND THE HAVE-NOTS.

- MANKIND INCLUDES EXTREMES, - MR. GRUDGE.

EXTREMES, YET SOME PEOPLE

LIVING ALONE IN A 24-ROOM HOUSE,

AND 24 OTHERS LIVING

IN ONE ROOM.

SOME EATING

HIGH OFF THE HOG...

AND SOME

SIMPLY NOT EATING AT ALL.

NOT AT ALL.

DISPLACED PERSONS.

- TODAY, - MORE THAN 20 YEARS AFTER...

QUITE A FEW OF THEM

STILL AROUND.

THE BARBED-WIRE SET.

HOW CAN YOU EAT LIKE THIS

- WHEN YOU KNOW THAT THEY'RE - RIGHT THERE, STARING AT YOU?

WHY NOT?

- WELL, - IT TAKES A SPECIAL BREED

- TO STUFF HIMSELF - IN FRONT OF STARVING...

- YOU HIT THE POINT THERE, - OLD BOY. YOU REALLY DID.

IT TAKES A SPECIAL BREED,

INDEED.

- BUT YOU SEE, I DON'T HAPPEN - TO BE A BREED, MR. GRUDGE.

I'M A GHOST.

I DON'T HAVE A HEART.

I DON'T HAVE A SOUL.

NO NERVE ENDINGS,

NO BRAIN CENTER.

I'M JUST A REFLECTION.

- BUT THEN, - I'VE ALREADY TOLD YOU THAT.

SHALL I NOW TELL YOU HOW MANY

TIMES YOU'VE STUFFED YOURSELF

WHILE 2/3 OF THE WORLD STARVED

IN A CAGE?

HERE.

THROW THEM A BONE.

- DON'T YOU - TALK TO ME LIKE THAT.

I HAVE FEELINGS.

NOTHING ON THIS EARTH

COULD FORCE ME TO EAT

- WHILE STARVING PEOPLE - WATCHED ME.

- WATCHING MAKES - ALL THE DIFFERENCE, WHAT?

YOU NEVER SAW THEM WHILE TEARING

INTO YOUR MASHED POTATOES.

THEY WEREN'T ACTUALLY THERE

WHEN YOU BUTTERED YOUR BREAD.

THERE.

BETTER, MR. GRUDGE?

APPETITE BACK?

DO... SIT DOWN.

- YOU'RE GONNA HAVE - TO EXPLAIN

THE LOGIC OF MAN TO ME,

MR. GRUDGE.

FOR EXAMPLE,

TELL ME HOW YOU COME ABOUT

YOUR SELECTIVE MORALITY,

THIS EASE WITH WHICH YOU STRIP

OFF YOUR CONSCIENCE

LIKE AN OVERCOAT

AND LET YOUR SATISFIED BELCH

DROWN OUT THE HUNGER CRIES

THAT FILL THE AIR AROUND YOU.

HOW DO YOU CREATE

THIS EXACT SCIENCE

WHEREBY

YOU DISINVOLVE YOURSELF

- FROM ALL THE ANGUISH - OF THE WORLD

- THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN TO BE - IN YOUR DIRECT LINE OF VISION?

THAT DOESN'T TAKE A SPECIAL

BREED OF MAN AT ALL, MR. GRUDGE.

THAT IS MAN

IN HIS NORMAL CONDITION.

NO.

NO, MAN ISN'T CRUEL.

I DON'T THINK I'M CRUEL,

BUT WE CAN'T...

AT LEAST... AT LEAST I CAN'T

SPEND MY TIME GRIEVING

BECAUSE PART OF THE WORLD IS

RICH AND PART OF IT IS POOR,

BECAUSE PART OF IT HAS

AND PART OF IT HAS NOT.

BUT WE SEE, WHEN WE ACTUALLY SEE

HUMAN BEINGS IN WANT,

WE REACT, WE RESPOND.

IS THAT A FACT,

MR. GRUDGE?

- Daniel: DO YOU INSIST - UPON MAKING IT A BETTER WORL?

WON'T YOU DIE HAPPY

UNTIL YOU DO?

- DO YOU INSIST UPON HELPING - THE NEEDY AND OPPRESSED?

- THEN TELL THEM - TO HELP THEMSELVES.

- LET THEM KNOW - THE CASH DRAWER IS CLOSED,

AND MAKE THEM BELIEVE IT.

- YOU'LL BE SURPRISED HOW MUCH - LESS NEEDY AND OPPRESSED

THE NEEDY AND OPPRESSED

TURN OUT TO BE.

I COULDN'T EAT

ANOTHER BITE.

THEY MAKE THE PORTIONS

MUCH TOO BIG THESE DAYS.

OBSOLETE MATERIALS.

VITAMINS, CALORIES,

SMALL FRAGMENTS OF NUTRITION...

THAT'S NOT

WHAT THEY WANT.

YOU TELL THEM, MR. GRUDGE.

YOU TELL THEM WHAT IT IS.

IT'S BOMBERS AND MISSILES,

ISN'T IT?

- TELL THEM. - THAT'S THEIR DIET FOR SURVIVAL.

NO, NO, THAT... THAT WAS

IN A DIFFERENT CONTEXT.

I WAS TALKING POLITICS

AT THE TIME.

POLITICS, MR. GRUDGE?

POLITICS?

NOW, GRASP THIS,

IF YOU CAN.

HUMANITY IS NO LONGER

A POLITICAL THESIS.

IT IS NOT

A SUBJECT FOR DEBATE.

THERE ARE NO PROS AND CONS,

NO ARGUMENTS AND REBUTTALS.

WE ARE TALKING

ABOUT HUMAN WANT AND HUMAN NEED,

AND THIS

IS A FACT OF LIFE.

- AND AS TO YOUR INVOLVEMENT, - MR. GRUDGE,

YOU ARE INVOLVED, SIR,

AS OF THE DATE OF YOUR BIRTH.

YOU ARE ALL MANKIND

BECAUSE YOU ARE

A PART OF MANKIND,

A WILLY-NILLY,

AS IT WERE.

MANKIND, MR. GRUDGE.

IN THERE.

THE HUNGRY PART

OF MANKIND.

THE ANGUISHED PART.

THE DISPOSSESSED.

IF YOU SHARED

A LOAF OF BREAD WITH THEM,

HOW WOULD YOU BE

RELINQUISHING YOUR FREEDOM?

- OR IF YOU JOINED - OTHER NATIONS

- TO ADMINISTER VACCINATIONS - TO THEIR CHILDREN?

HOW WOULD YOU HAVE

DESECRATED YOUR FLAG?

OR IF YOU HAD OFFERED THEM

SOLACE AND HOPE AND COMFORT,

HOW WOULD YOU HAVE MADE YOURSELF

SUSCEPTIBLE TO TYRANNY?

WHAT ARE THEY SINGING?

FOREIGN WORDS.

BUT NOT NECESSARILY CONSPIRACIES

TO DESTROY YOU, MR. GRUDGE.

JUST CHRISTMAS SONGS.

- AND OF THOSE - WHO DO NOT CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS,

SONGS OF HOPE.

- THEY SANG THEM - IN THEIR LANGUAGES

BEFORE YOU DID IN YOURS.

- YOUR CHRISTMASES - HAVE JUST BEEN A LOT MERRIER.

THAT'S ALL.

AND YOUR HOPE

MORE OF A REALITY.

ARE THERE MANY LIKE THIS?

MANY?

MR. GRUDGE, MANY?

- YOU'D LIKE IT - STATISTICALLY?

- WOULD YOU - APPRECIATE THAT?

THE CLEAN, CALCULATED ORDER

OF MATHEMATICS?

- LIKE HOW MANY MILLION TONS - OF WHEAT ARE SURPLUS,

HOW MANY TONS OF BUTTER

ROT IN WAREHOUSES?

WELL, HERE IT IS,

MR. GRUDGE... ARITHMETIC,

THE MATHEMATICS OF NOW,

RIGHT NOW, THIS CHRISTMAS,

BUT DON'T TAKE YOUR EYES

OFF THESE FACES.

KEEP RELATING.

- ON THIS EARTH, - MR. GRUDGE,

THERE ARE 10 MILLION

DISPLACED PERSONS.

- THEY'RE WITHOUT HOMES, - WITHOUT PROPERTY.

THEY OWN NOTHING.

THEY ARE STRIPPED OF RIGHTS,

STRIPPED OF NATIONALITY.

BARBED-WIRE NOMADS

- WHOSE CRIME WAS THAT THEY LIVED - IN A WORLD THAT WENT TO WAR.

DON'T TAKE YOUR EYES

OFF OF THEM!

- KEEP RELATING, - MR. GRUDGE.

ON THIS EARTH,

13 MILLION HUMAN BEINGS

HAVE TUBERCULOSIS.

THERE ARE

10 MILLION BLIND.

THERE ARE

130 MILLION CASES OF MALARIA.

TODAY, THE PRESENT,

NOW ON THE CLOCK,

AND NOW ON THE CALENDAR,

2/3 OF THE WORLD,

MR. GRUDGE, GO TO BED HUNGRY.

1/2 OF

THE EARTH'S POPULATION...

THAT'S 3 BILLION PEOPLE...

ACTUALLY SUFFER FROM HUNGER,

FROM LACK OF FOOD.

OF THESE, MR. GRUDGE,

THERE ARE 100 MILLION CHILDREN.

NO MORE, NOW!

NO MORE NOW?

NO MORE THIS MOMENT?

WHEN, MR. GRUDGE?

TOMORROW, THURSDAY,

A WEEK FROM TODAY,

WILL YOU THINK ABOUT THEM?

A MONTH FROM TODAY,

WILL YOU INVOLVE YOURSELF?

- I-I DON'T WANT TO SEE THEM. - I DON'T WANT TO LOOK AT THEM.

DO!

DO, MR. GRUDGE!

LOOK AT THEM... NOW!

BECAUSE TOMORROW,

A WEEK FROM NOW,

A LOT OF THEM

WON'T BE AROUND!

NO MORE, NOW!

I WANT TO GET OUT!

- I WANT TO GO BACK - WHERE I BELONG!

DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!

- I JUST WANT - TO LEAVE HERE!

PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE!

Ghost of Christmas Future:

SO, THERE YOU ARE, GRUDGE.

I WAS EXPECTING YOU.

- I THOUGHT - YOU'D BE HERE A BIT SOONER.

WHY, THIS IS THE MEETING HALL

IN OUR TOWN.

THAT'S WHAT IT IS.

THIS IS OUR TOWN HALL.

WHY IS IT THIS WAY?

YOU'RE IN THE FUTURE,

MR. GRUDGE.

THE FUTURE?

WORLD'S FUTURE.

YOU'VE GONE ON A BIT,

SO TO SPEAK.

WHAT DO YOU THINK

OF THE OLD NEIGHBORHOOD?

OUR TOWN HALL.

- BUT WHAT COULD HAVE DONE THIS? - WHAT HAPPENED HERE?

TIME.

TIME HAPPENED HERE,

MR. GRUDGE.

ATTRITION, NEGLECT, MISUSE,

A FEW PASSING CATASTROPHES.

TIME.

OF LITTLE CONSEQUENCE,

REALLY.

THERE GREW TO BE LESS AND LESS

NEED FOR A MEETING PLACE,

- FOR A PLATFORM - FOR DEBATE.

THE AMERICAN TOWN HALL,

YOU WILL REMEMBER, MR. GRUDGE,

WAS A MICROCOSM OF ALL

THE MEETING HALLS OF THE WORLD,

PLACES WHERE MEN

COULD TALK IT OVER.

IT SEEMS WE REACHED

A MOMENT IN TIME

WHEN TALK

BECAME SUPERFLUOUS,

SO NOW YOUR TOWN HALL

IS PAST TENSE.

- BUT THEN AGAIN, - IF YOU STEP OUTSIDE,

YOU WILL NOTE THAT MOST

OF WHAT YOU SEE IS PAST TENSE.

OR RATHER,

MOST OF WHAT YOU DON'T SEE.

HOW FAR IN THE FUTURE

AM I?

IT IS "A" CHRISTMAS EVE,

"A" NIGHT OF DECEMBER THE 24th.

THE YEAR IS NOT IMPORTANT.

CALENDARS ARE

PAST TENSE NOW ALSO.

THE CLOCK IS STOPPED.

INDEED.

THE CLOCK IS STOPPED.

SO HAS ELECTRICITY.

THE FACT IS

- THERE ARE SO FEW PEOPLE AROUND, - THE LOSS IS HARDLY NOTICED.

WHY?

COMPREHENDING, ARE YOU,

MR. GRUDGE?

THERE WAS A WAR.

A DANDY.

WHEN?

WHEN?

ON DOOMSDAY.

- WE DON'T HAVE DATES NOW, - BUT THAT'S HOW IT'S REMEMBERED.

- THE EXACT HOUR HARDLY MATTERS, - DOES IT?

- IT SEEMED - AT A GIVEN MOMENT,

WE THOUGHT

THAT THEY'D DROPPED SOME BOMBS,

- OR TH THOUGHT - WE'D DROPPED SOME BOMB.

ANYWAY, SOMEBODY THOUGHT

SOMEBODY HAD DROPPED SOME BOMBS.

BY THEN, OF COURSE,

EVERYBODY HAD THE BOMB.

- THEY'D ALL BEEN WANTING IT, - YOU REMEMBER?

IT GOT SO WITH NO CONTROLS

THAT NOBODY WAS REALLY ANYBODY

- IF THEY DIDN'T HAVE - THE BOMB.

WHAT YOU SEE BEFORE YOU,

MR. GRUDGE, IS A TINY PART

OF A BIG, ROUND, RADIOACTIVE

MUD BURYING GROUND.

IS IT ALL LIKE THIS?

- IS THE WHOLE WORLD - A BURYING GROUND?

ALL OF IT!

ALL OF THE TOWNS

AND ALL OF THE MEETING PLACES

AND ALL OF THE COUNTRIES

OF THE WORLD... JUST LIKE THIS.

DID NO ONE SPEAK OUT?

WAS THERE

NO SINGLE VOICE OF REASON?

BUT...

- WHAT ABOUT - THE... THE UNITED NATIONS?

- IT WAS SUPPOSED - TO KEEP THE PEACE.

THE UNITED...

OH.

THAT TOWN MEETING HAL.

- OH, YES, WELL, THAT WENT - SOME TIME BACK, I'M AFRAID.

- YOU SEE, - THEY DROPPED OUT.

OR MAYBE WE DROPPED OUT.

ANYWAY,

SOMEBODY DROPPED OUT,

AND PRETTY SOON, EVERYBODY

WAS DROPPING OR HAD DROPPED OUT.

AND BEFORE ANYBODY KNEW IT,

THE TALKING HAD STOPPED.

BUT THERE WERE VOICES,

MR. GRUDGE.

THE WORLD DIDN'T LACK

FOR SOUND.

- BEHIND EACH SEPARATE FENCE, - EACH SEPARATE WALL

CAME SCREAMS OF ANGER,

SUSPICION, AND PREJUDICE.

AND THEY GREW,

AND THEY GREW.

BUT THERE WERE NO ANSWERS,

REMEMBER,

NO DISCUSSION,

NO PLACE FOR IT.

- AND SO, IN THE END, - THE WORLD WAS FILLED

WITH THE NOISE OF HATE,

AND INEVITABLY...

AHH.

THE INHERITING STRONG

OF THE EARTH.

THE FITTEST

WHO HAPPENED TO SURVIVE.

- THE LEFTOVERS - OF THE CRAP GAME

- AFTER THEY - ROLLED THE H-BOMB

AND NOBODY

MADE THEIR POINT.

I AM THE IMPERIAL ME.

All: THE IMPERIAL ME!

HALLELUJAH!

AND THIS IS THE NON-GOVERNMENT

OF THE ME PEOPLE.

THE NON-GOVERNMENT

OF THE ME PEOPLE!

HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH!

NOW, WHY DON'T WE JUST RELAX

AND GET NICE AND COZY?

NOW, FOLKS,

THE FIRST ITEM ON TODAY'S AGENDA

IS THIS BUSINESS

OF THE PEOPLE FROM DOWN YONDER

AND THE PEOPLE FROM ACROSS RIVER

WANTING TO COME IN HERE

AND TALK ABOUT WHAT THEY CALL

OUR MUTUAL PROBLEMS,

OUR COMMON DIFFERENCES.

NOW, THEY WANT

TO TALK, TALK, TALK, TALK, TALK

ABOUT OUR PROBLEMS.

THEY WANT TO DEBATE, DEBATE,

DEBATE ABOUT SOLUTIONS

UNTIL SOMEHOW

THEY GET THEIR PROBLEMS SOLVED.

THEY WANT TO WASTE OUR TIME.

THEY WANT US TO COMMIT OURSELVES

TO THAT KIND OF SURRENDER.

UNPATRIOTIC!

- THEY'RE... - THEY'RE INSANE.

UNPATRIOTIC!

NOW, THEN.

THEY DON'T COME OUT

IN SO MANY WORDS

AND SAY THAT THEY WANT

TO TAKE US OVER.

THEY'RE TOO CLEVER FOR THAT.

BUT THAT'S WHAT THEY WANT.

THEY WANT

TO TAKE OVER US INDIVIDUAL ME.

AND IF WE LET THEM SEEP IN HERE

FROM DOWN YONDER

AND ACROSS RIVER,

IF WE LET THESE DO-GOODERS,

THESE BLEEDING HEARTS PROPAGATE

THEIR INSIDIOUS DOCTRINE

OF INVOLVEMENT AMONG US,

THEN, MY DEAR FRIENDS,

MY BELOVED MEs,

WE'SE IN TROUBLE...

DEEP, DEEP TROUBLE.

AND BECAUSE...

BECAUSE WE HAVE NOW REACHED

A PURE STATE OF CIVILIZATION,

THE WORLD OF THE ULTIMATE ME

IS FINALLY WITHIN OUR GRASP...

THIS WORLD WHERE ONLY THE STRONG

WILL EXIST,

WHERE ONLY THE POWERFUL

WILL LOVE,

WHERE FINALLY THE WORD "WE"

WILL BE STAMPED OUT

AND WILL BECOME "I" FOREVER.

BECAUSE WE ARE EACH THE WISE...

WE ARE EACH THE STRONG...

AND WE ARE EACH

THE INDIVIDUAL MEs!

THERE'S CHARLES.

HEY, CHARLES! OVER HERE!

IT'S MR. GRUDGE!

HE DOESN'T HEAR YOU.

HE DOESN'T SEE YOU.

- YOU'RE AS MUCH A PHANTOM - AS I AM.

LISTEN! LISTEN!

NO, LISTEN!

NO!

PLEASE! NO!

LISTEN!

LISTEN TO ME!

PLEASE, LET ME SPEAK!

LET HIM SPEAK.

TO THE BEST OF OUR KNOWLEDGE,

WE ARE ALL OF HUMANITY

WHO REMAIN ALIVE,

ALL THAT'S LEFT.

NOW, WE HAVE SURVIVED

THE HOLOCAUST,

AND IF WE ARE

TO GO ON SURVIVING,

WE MUST WORK TOGETHER NOW.

WE MUST TALK TOGETHER.

- AND IF OTHER PEOPLE WANT - TO JOIN US,

IF THEY WANT TO TALK WITH US,

WE... WE MUST LISTEN TO THEM.

AND WE MUST RESPOND TO THEM.

WE MUST BEGIN AGAIN.

WE MUST HAVE LAW AGAIN AND

ETHICS AND HONOR AND DECENCY.

- THESE THINGS - WERE NOT DESTROYED BY THE BOMB!

- THIS TIME, - THEY MUST BE MADE REAL!

THEY MUST BE MADE FACTS!

ONLY THESE THINGS

CAN GUARANTEE OUR SURVIVAL!

THE POTENTIAL GOODNESS OF MAN.

THE POTENTIAL MORALITY OF MAN.

THE CAPABILITY... THAT'S IT!

THE CAPABILITY OF HUMAN BEINGS

TO ACHIEVE DIGNITY AND DECENCY.

TOGETHER!

NOT "I" OR "THEY," BUT "WE."

DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?

THE ONLY ALTERNATIVE TO THAT

IS NOTHING!

DON'T YOU SEE THAT, PEOPLE?!

DON'T YOU SEE?!

- THAT'S ENOUGH. - BRING HIM OVER HERE.

COME. BRING HIM OVER HERE.

YOU ARE CHARGED

WITH THE TREASON OF INVOLVEMENT.

YOU ARE CHARGED

WITH THE SUBVERSION

OF THE INDIVIDUAL ME.

HOW DO YOU PLEAD?

Woman: GUILTY, GUILTY!

All: GUILTY, GUILTY, GUILTY!

YOU ANYTHING TO SAY?

- IT'S YOUR RIGHT - AS AN INDIVIDUAL ME, YOU KNOW.

- JUST SAY ANYTHING - THAT COMES IN YOUR HEAD.

- YOU DON'T HAVE - TO THINK ABOUT IT.

JUST SAY IT.

GO AHEAD.

OH, YOU WANT

TO USE THE MICROPHONE?

I MAY BE

ALL THE SANITY THAT IS LEFT.

I MAY BE ALL THE CONSCIENCE

THAT REMAINS ON EARTH.

I CAN'T LET YOU KILL ME!

JUMP.

JUMP.

JUMP.

ANIMALS.

MISERABLE,

ROTTEN ANIMALS.

REVELATION, MR. GRUDGE?

- BRAND-NEW EXPERIENCE FOR YOU, - IS IT?

DON'T YOU REMEMBER

- PEOPLE SHOUTING - "JUMP, JUMP, JUMP" IN YOUR DAY,

- CLOSING THEIR WINDOWS - TO SCREAMS IN THE STREET?

- HIDING BEHIND THEIR NEWSPAPERS - IN THE SUBWAYS

- WHILE THEIR FELLOW MEN - WERE BEING ASSAULTED?

AND LATER, WHILE CIVILIZATION

WAS BEING RAPED?

TAKE A GOOD LOOK,

MR. GRUDGE!

AND NOW, MY FRIENDS,

NEXT ON THE AGENDA,

- WE MUST GO OUT - AND DISPOSE OF THOSE PEOPLE

- FROM DOWN YONDER - AND ACROSS RIVER

- WHO WANT - TO COME IN HERE AND TALK.

WE MUST DISPOSE OF THEM,

YOU UNDERSTAND?

All: DISPOSE! DISPOSE!

BECAUSE WE ARE

THE INDIVIDUAL MEs,

AND WE MUST CARRY

OUR GLORIOUS PHILOSOPHY

THROUGH

TO ITS GLORIOUS CULMINATION

SO THAT THE END, WITH ENTERPRISE

AND DETERMINATION,

THE WORLD AND EVERYTHING IN IT

WILL BELONG

TO ONE INDIVIDUAL ME,

AND THAT'LL BE THE ULTIMATE,

THE ABSOLUTE ULTIMATE!

SO, MEs, AFTER WE KILL

THE INTERLOPERS, THE TALKERS,

THE INVOLVERS

WHO ARE ON THEIR WAY HERE NOW,

WE SHALL THEN BE FREE TO PROCEED

WITH THE MOST IMPORTANT BUSINESS

OF ALL, WHICH IS...

THE KILLING OF EACH OTHER

UNTIL THERE REMAINS

ONLY THE ONE INDIVIDUAL ME.

RIGHT?

All: RIGHT!

ONE!

ONE!

ALONE!

ALONE!

THEN LET'S GET AT IT.

EACH BEHIND HIS OWN FENCE,

EACH BEHIND HIS OWN BARRICADE.

FOLLOW ME,

MY FRIENDS, MY LOVED ONES,

TO THE PERFECT SOCIETY...

THE CIVILIZATION OF "I"!

PICTORIAL ENOUGH FOR YOU,

IS IT, MR. GRUDGE?

RUBBLE AND MADNESS.

RUBBLE AND MADNESS...

I CAN'T IMAGINE

WHY YOU'RE SURPRISED.

- WHEN THE FIRST BOMB DROPPED - ON HIROSHIMA,

- THE FATE OF MAN - COULD HAVE BEEN PREDICTED

BY A CUT-RATE GYPSY.

THE ULTIMATE GARDEN OF EDEN...

PLANTED BY MAN,

CULTIVATED BY HIS WEAPONS,

AND IRRIGATED BY HIS BLOOD,

AND BROUGHT TO FRUITION

BY HIS PREJUDICES AND HIS HATE.

GHOST...

GHOST, TELL ME SOMETHING.

- DID I DIE - BEFORE ALL THIS?

- TELL ME - WHAT HAPPENED TO ME.

WHAT HAPPENED TO ME?!

JUST ANSWER ME ONE THING!

ONE THING!

IS THE WORLD

THAT YOU'VE SHOWN ME TONIGHT

THE WORLD AS IT MUST BE

OR AS IT MIGHT BE?

TELL ME!

I WANT TO KNOW!

TELL ME! TELL ME!

MUST IT BE LIKE THIS?

MUST IT BE LIKE THIS?!

TELL ME!

TELL ME! TELL ME!

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT, SIR?

I JUST WENT UP

TO CALL YOU.

YOUR BED

HADN'T BEEN SLEPT IN.

OH, I, UH...

- I MUST HAVE DOZED OFF - BY THE FIRE IN THE STUDY.

I, UH...

I SPENT THE NIGHT

DOWN HERE, CHARLES.

THEN I'LL SEE

ABOUT YOUR BREAKFAST, SIR.

UNCLE DAN.

GOOD MORNING.

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

YES, OF COURSE I AM.

WHY SHOULDN'T I BE?

- YOU DIDN'T SEEM TOO GOOD - AT 3:00 THIS MORNING.

I WHAT?

WHEN YOU PHONED ME.

WHEN I PHONED YOU?

OH, YES, I-I MAY WELL

HAVE DONE THAT.

COME IN... PLEASE.

YOU SAID ON THE PHONE

- THAT YOU WANTED ME - TO DROP BY ON MY WAY TO CHURCH,

THAT YOU HAD

SOMETHING TO SAY TO ME.

I... WELL, I-I JUST WANTED

TO... TO APOLOGIZE TO YOU, FRED,

FOR... FOR LAST NIGHT.

THANK YOU, UNCLE DAN.

I...

THAT'S FROM NEW YORK...

UNITED NATIONS.

- CHILDREN OF THE DELEGATES - SINGING CHRISTMAS CAROLS

IN THEIR NATIVE LANGUAGES.

- OF COURSE, - THAT WON'T STOP THEIR FATHERS

FROM BEATING EACH OTHER'S BRAINS

OUT TOMORROW... WITH WORDS.

I'VE HEARD THOSE SONGS.

NOT HERE, SOMEWHERE ELSE.

RECENTLY, TOO.

I'LL HAVE CHARLES

TURN IT OFF.

UH, NO.

NO.

IT'S A GOOD SOUND...

KIDS' VOICES.

YOU KNOW, FRED, I, UH...

ABOUT THIS FAMILY OF NATIONS,

I'M NOT AT ALL SURE

THAT IT'S THE FINAL ANSWER.

PERHAPS

IT'S NOT THE FINAL ONE,

BUT SO FAR,

IT'S THE ONLY POSSIBLE ONE.

POSSIBILITY, PERHAPS.

- SO LONG - AS THERE ARE CHILDREN,

- I SUPPOSE - THERE ARE POSSIBILITIES.

SO LONG

AS THERE ARE CHILDREN,

THERE HAVE TO BE

POSSIBILITIES.

- I'VE BEEN GIVING THINGS - SOME THOUGHT,

SOME

SOME SECOND THOUGHTS.

OH?

ANY CONCLUSIONS?

- NO, MAYBE - AN OBSERVATION OR TWO.

FOR INSTANCE?

FOR INSTANCE,

THE OLD ONE, BANAL BY NOW,

THAT NO MAN,

AS THE POET SAYS, IS AN ISLAND.

IT SEEMS

THE CONCLUSION IS INEVITABLE.

THERE MUST BE INVOLVEMENT.

EVERY MAN'S DEATH

DOES DIMINISH ME.

IT APPEARS WE'VE RUN OUT OF THE

LUXURY OF ALTERNATIVES, FRED.

WE FIND OURSELVES

LIVING IN A WORLD

IN WHICH WE EITHER GREET

THE MORNING OR ACCEPT THE NIGHT.

SO, I WISH YOU

A MERRY CHRISTMAS, FRED.

AND A GOOD MORNING.

MERRY CHRISTMAS, UNCLE.

♪ GOD REST, YE MERRY GENTLEMEN ♪

♪ LET NOTHING YOU DISMAY ♪

♪ REMEMBER CHRIST, OUR SAVIOR ♪

♪ WAS BORN ON CHRISTMAS DAY ♪

♪ TO SAVE US ALL

FROM SATAN'S POWER ♪

♪ WHEN WE WERE GONE ASTRAY ♪

GOOD MORNING, RUBY.

GOOD MORNING,

MR. GRUDGE.

♪ OH, TIDINGS

OF COMFORT AND JOY ♪

I, UH... I THOUGHT I'D HAVE

MY COFFEE IN HERE THIS MORNING.

♪ GLO-O-O-O-O-O-RIA

♪ IN EXCELSIS DEO

♪ GLO-O-O-O-O-O-RIA

♪ IN EXCELSIS DEO ♪

♪ OH, COME, ALL YE FAITHFUL

♪ JOYFUL AND TRIUMPHANT

♪ OH, COME, YE, OH, COME, YE

♪ TO BETHLEHEM

♪ COME AND BEHOLD HIM

♪ BORN THE KING OF ANGELS

♪ OH, COME, LET US ADORE HIM

♪ OH, COME, LET US ADORE HIM

♪ OH, COME, LET US ADORE HIM

♪ CHRIST, THE LORD

♪ A-A-A-AMEN

♪ A-A-A-AMEN