Original subtitles

Get you anything else?

Cheryl.

What are you doing here?

I just wanna talk.

I have a restraining order.

I'm calling the cops.

Where'd you get that?

I need you to listen to me.

No.

I stopped at the diner for a caffeine fix.

I just worked a double shift at the hospital.

I'm a pediatric nurse.

And what happened next?

A man walked in and started arguing with the waitress.

Then I saw him pull out a ghost gun.

Objection.

The witness isn't qualified to characterize what he saw as a ghost gun.

Sustained.

Your Honor, I can qualify my witness's expertise.

Sustained, Mr. Wilson. Move on.

Does the judge hate our case, hate us, or both?

My company sells, uh, build-your-own kits

for personal weapon hobbyists.

Hobbyists?

And does CovertCraft's website require any kind of background check

before these hobbyists can place an order?

It's not required by law, so no.

And that allowed a domestic abuser to purchase this gun that shot my client.

Is that right?

No, again, we-we don't sell guns. We sell kits.

A kit that fires a bullet.

What would you call that?

Objection. Badgering the witness.

Sustained.

Mr. Wilson, please do not try my patience.

Thanks again for being my second chair, Harry.

I know things haven't been going our way with the judge,

but, hey, we've got a good jury, right?

Juror number five, the landscape architect,

he's been taking notes.

Elton, it wouldn't matter if you had the best jury in the world

if the judge throws out the verdict.

- Think she'd do it? - Judge Marlene Gannon?

I choked down enough of her family's awful bourbon

at her reelection fundraisers to know that, yes, she can be bought.

Then what do we do about it?

Well, trial's on pause for the rest of the week.

Why don't you go over these testimonies?

I'm gonna call some friends.

Whew!

What are all those faces?

Breanna saw you in court. She called us.

She said you were getting your ass handed to you.

I did not say that.

You didn't say it. You texted it with stupid emojis.

It says, "Harry, ass, hand, gavel."

- Where's Sophie? - She's in London

visiting her stepdaughter.

She thought it would be a good time because you were in trial.

Well, the important thing is we wanted to help you, so we did.

With this.

The old Trojan fake Rolex bit.

Ooh.

Hey, Katie.

What is this, uh, product placement appointment with "Militia Mountain Man"?

Wait. Militia Mountain who?

Look. I'm not saying that the end is near.

I'm saying do you want... Would you rather be a warrior in a garden

than a gardener in a war?

And that is how you cook a pig in the ground.

- Katie, I need you. - Huh.

Breanna, you better sell this guy.

My outfit doesn't necessarily say business opportunity.

Do not worry.

My bots are on it.

Now, Philip, Philip can be a little aggro now and then, but he's a sweetheart.

It's Dennis.

Dennis is a rascal.

These are not real people. They're robots.

They are bespoke bots created by me, powered by AI.

Oh, now, Dennis. You crossed the line on that one.

Steve Pointer. CovertCraft.

Right. So, you are, uh, Militia Mountain Man?

- Yeah. - I am... I'm so impressed with your channel.

You have, um, 200,000 followers...

...who would be very interested in our kits.

Yeah, well, my people know how to build stuff.

And I'm not talking Ikea furniture, if you know what I mean.

Yeah.

Definitely.

Uh, let me, uh... Come on. Let me show you around.

Come on. Let's go.

Hmm.

This is our newest model.

Unlike, uh, most products on the market, this baby is durable.

She will go 2,000 rounds...

without failing.

Say, aren't you all on trial for something that you--

Uh, no. That's a nuisance that's about to go away.

The judge, she's, uh, sympathetic.

Good news.

I just got the numbers he punched in using his heat signature.

Zero, one, two, four and seven.

Bad news, I don't know the order

and I only have four tries before it shuts down.

Hey, Triple M. Let me cut to the chase.

I'd love to be your go-to bunker protection provider,

so, uh, should we, uh, talk terms or what?

Parker, you're about to have company.

- I need more time. - Hey!

Hey! Take...

- Yeah? - How did they get to you?

Who? The council. The octopus.

Are these cameras?

Are you wearing a wire?

Oh. The safe code. I figured it out.

The date of incorporation. July 4, 2021.

High five.

Is that what you got from the story, huh? A safe code?

I got hit with a flashlight, man. I got maced. I got chased by some robot.

Yeah, yeah. The important thing is, I got this from the safe.

Steve gave each of his employees a thousand dollars

to donate to the judge's reelection campaign.

And then donated three days before your case began.

- Proof of bribery. - So, the judge gets tossed off the case

and you have a fair shot at taking CovertCraft down.

I know I'm not the best at emotional cues, but this feels wrong.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Everything that you just said is perfectly legal.

No, he gave his employees money to give to the judge

that's presiding over his case.

Welcome to the American judicial system.

He paid for a vacation for Judge Gannon and for other judges.

Legal.

He bought the judge's mom's house for over market value.

Yeah, well, there's no law that says you have to have good business sense.

Look, it is nearly impossible to find an American public servant guilty of bribery.

You need literally a video of somebody handing Judge Gannon a big bag of cash

and saying out loud,

"I'm giving you this cash so that you will find favorably for me."

And Judge Gannon has to take that cash and she has to say out loud,

"I will find for you because of this cash."

Anything else, I'm sorry to say, is perfectly but insanely legal.

So, you need the judge to actually say "quid pro quo" or it's not a bribe?

Yes, but you forgot about the big bag of cash.

There's one big problem.

I mean, if any of us get recorded bribing a judge, we'd get arrested.

What if the person paying the bribe didn't exist?

What do you mean the briber doesn't exist?

Did I mention... 'Cause I'm working on a side project,

I mi... I might have... I definitely hacked into the Louisiana DMV.

Wow. Right after they made you retake your road test, huh?

How convenient.

Yeah.

Okay. I downloaded all the ID photos for every registered driver in the state,

then I fed all of them into the Eigenface algorithm.

It gave me a composite image of a person

who one of our marks would believe radiates power, wealth.

Meet Frankenstein.

Or as I like to call him, Frank.

So you asked for wealth and power and it gave you a weatherman?

Well, I prompted the algorithm to give me a wide variety of faces,

but when I entered successful or educated or trustworthy--

The algorithm keeps giving you a white guy with perfect teeth and good hair.

AI algorithms do not create.

They mimic the biases of their creators.

So, yes. All their creators happen to be 30-year-old white guys

that smell like Axe.

So, you made a Frank. What can he do?

Nothing on his own,

but with some motion capture software

and a voice synthesizer that I made from scratch,

I can be Frank's puppet master.

Whoa!

Hang on.

You can make this Frank thing bribe a judge?

Yes. So, here's the idea.

We have the deal go down in an online meeting that she thinks is secure,

but we record it and then have a bagman deliver the cash.

Ooh, and then we can rig the bag of cash with a camera to confirm the bribe.

All right, well, does that work, Harry?

Well, if you took all that video evidence

and you send it to the State Ethics Committee anonymously,

yeah, you could get a mistrial. Maybe get Gannon thrown off the case.

So, yes.

Why is this Frank bribing a judge on your case?

He's not on trial.

Well, maybe they're in the same business.

Not guns, but maybe 3D printing,

and he's afraid that the trial's gonna affect his bottom line.

Hmm, but the judge could just ask Frank

to write a check to her campaign just like Steve.

Not if we create for her a very sudden, urgent need for cash.

Well, you'd need a white whale.

Bourbon.

Truly awful bourbon.

That's how we're gonna do it.

Don't be shy.

Come taste Mardi Grain bourbon.

Old family recipe of a hundred years old.

Well, hello, sir.

Here you go.

Oh. Oh, well, you must have an allergy.

All right. Just gonna move this one right over here.

Oh, well. Trying to get on my good side, counselor?

No. I can assure you, I only came to savor your family business.

We distill our flavor from mashed recycled coconut shells.

Oh, Lord.

These Gen Z upstarts with their... with their fancy machines

and their... and their weird recipes.

They don't understand the old ways.

Family values, faith.

Good for the soul. Good for the bourbon.

Well, I'll drink to that. I'll see you in court.

You are not paying attention. You are not listening to me.

These are one of a kind. My casks are one of a kind. Not like this.

No. We make our casks from recycled chopsticks.

These are Old Magnolia casks.

I want you to close your eyes.

Forget life as you know it.

At my new start-up, Stanford 360...

...I have created something that will change everything.

I present to you...

...a quantum leap in 3D printing.

The Mira-Machine.

Imagine creating--

Create anything in your own home.

From a dishwasher seal...

...to an artificial limb, in a machine the size of a shoebox.

Now, I only have one question.

Who's ready to create the future?

Old Magnolia.

Went out of business in 1918.

All the original casks were destroyed during prohibition.

No one's been able to replicate the taste ever since.

If those casks are genuine,

they could change the game for whoever buys them.

You know your history. Good for you.

My grandfather owned one of the original bottles.

It had a rustic, powerful flavor.

Yes. Very smooth.

Full-bodied.

Sweet.

And underneath it all, there is a... How you say?

A burning.

- You see, bourbon is not only my passion. - Mmm.

- It is also my business. - Oh.

I have tracked ten kegs back to the original distillery.

All underwater due to Katrina.

And I tell you, an alligator...

- Oh, no, no, no. - ...nearly severed my--

- How much do you want for them? - Oh.

They are 20 grand each.

Cash.

Cash?

Can't you take a check?

I am a judge.

Yeah.

Sorry.

I'm sorry. It is a cash game, madam.

You see, you have to pay to win.

However, when you find the cash...

give me a call.

Hey. How's Astrid?

Oh, she's great.

She's working hard, but her work's bringing her to New Orleans next month,

so our journey continues.

Ew. What's that?

Tech brew.

I'm trying to stay in character. All the guys drink it.

Every nutrient you need for prime cognitive function,

except taste.

I'll stick to tea.

So, I got up to speed on the plane.

How's your digital Frankenstein coming out party?

My bots are posing as friends of Frank's

and have been for the past two days.

And since business journalism is powered by AI,

all I had to do was seed Frank in with some real people,

and now these Wall Street guys think he's the real deal.

See for yourself.

But... ...that's fantastic.

In the past two hours,

five different billionaires have stepped up to fund Frank's start-up

for a magic box that doesn't do nothing.

By looking like this guy,

I've had money and power and opportunities thrown at my forehead.

I mean, I've always known the system is rigged, but this is...

Oh. There's one of our billionaires calling now.

Your dwindling faith in humanity is gonna have to wait.

It's time you get into character.

Hmm.

Dude, I just saw the pitch video and you crushed it.

As Stanford 360's first angel investor,

I am beyond stoked about your vision.

Thanks, man.

But there's a patch of hardpack on our Black Diamond that's...

- ...got me worried. - What's that?

It's a case going down in your backyard.

Thi-This company, CovertCraft, they make 3D printed gun kits.

One of their customers shot somebody. Of course the dude sued.

I'm worried the case is gonna create a precedent to regulate 3D printing.

It could screw our launch.

Dude, I know the judge. Marlene Gannon.

She's a member of my country club. I'll set us all up on a video meeting.

I owe you, bro.

Hey, and thanks for letting me stay at your place in Alaska.

Looking forward to shredding...

...the slopes.

Meritocracy?

Ha!

What is the point of doing anything?

For what it's worth, when I was an angry young grifter,

the point was, they started with everything.

I started with nothing.

And yet here I was, beating them.

Another conference?

No.

Wait. The judge just picked up on the trail we left for her to Eliot's casks.

Okay, good.

T.J., I need you to see if the building at this address

was condemned after Katrina.

Anything you can find on it.

All right. Go. Go, go, go, go. Don't look at me. Go.

Oh.

Hello. Great.

What's up, Dennis?

Sophie and Eliot are at the warehouse.

Ooh. Is that the meeting?

Yeah. Everyone's logging on now.

Who are those two?

Uh, Philip and Dennis. They're on his board. They're my bots.

The photo real versions.

Every online meeting needs two people who look impressed and nod.

He's wandering.

- Okay. - Oh.

Hey, Marlene. Long time no see.

Let me start by introducing you to the smartest,

most visionary man I have ever met.

Marlene, meet Frank Stanford.

Mr. Stanford,

Rick tells me that, uh, you have an interest in Rivera v. CovertCraft?

Yes, Judge.

My investors are worried that a verdict might set a precedent

that would negatively impact our upcoming product launch.

Bottom line, what would it take for you to settle this out of court?

What is he doing here?

Sorry to interrupt, Judge Gannon.

Uh, could you meet me in a private conversation room?

It's urgent.

Why, may I ask, are you interrupting my meeting?

Well, my assistant heard from Rick's assistant that this was going down,

and frankly, you should be thanking me. I-I'm saving you from yourself.

Saving me?

Steve, you're hardly my only donor.

Yeah, but I'm the donor who knows how to keep everything this side of legal.

I mean, this Frank guy, sure, he's the hot new thing,

but what do you really know about him?

Rick Bellamy vouched for him.

And I read an article about him in Modern Industrialist.

Yeah, he's got a lot of attention.

Which means one wrong move,

one donation without all the-the-the corners being covered,

the press finds out, and then he screws my case.

I mean, for-for all you know,

someone could be hacking into your secure meeting right now.

Oh.

Sorry for the interruption.

Mr. Stanford,

I think I'd feel more comfortable if we discussed this in person.

- Maybe you could come by my fundraiser... - Hmm. No, no, no.

...on Saturday?

- Absolutely. - No.

Looking forward to raising a glass of your world-famous bourbon.

Wait. What are we gonna do now?

We can't just make someone exist who doesn't exist.

I might have another idea.

So let me get this straight. We couldn't bribe the judge,

- so you created a fake guy. - Right.

But the judge would only deal with a real guy,

so you found a real guy who looks like the fake guy to fool her?

- Exactly. - So how did you do it?

I thought you made the fake guy out of thousands of real guys' faces.

Well, I did. I just had to retrace my steps.

So I found all the ID photos that the AI used to make Frank's face.

Then I cross-referenced them to find the best overall match.

- And that's this real guy Tim? - Yes.

Phew. Well, he sure lives in a nice house.

What?

What is it?

On today's edition of MenIfesting,

I want you to picture an eagle.

You think of America, freedom.

But the eagle is also a predator.

When an eagle sets its sharp gaze on a mouse, it tunes out everything else.

When an eagle sees a mouse, it tunes out everything else.

...undeterred by the noise around us.

Ask yourself, "What is my mouse?" And, "How do I know when to strike?"

What is my mouse?

- Hey, idiot! - What is my mouse?

I'm talking to you.

How much chlorine are you putting in there?

I came home the other day and my kid's eyes were all red.

Oh, uh, I think that might be from something else.

Son of a--

Who are you?

"Homeland Security. Division of Counterfeit Identities"?

- Have I done something wrong? - Can you identify the man in this photo?

- Bill Clinton. - Wrong.

This is James Mooney.

He's been Bill Clinton's body double for the past decade.

He is not the only one.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Michael Jordan. Britney Spears.

He can do all of them?

No. Just Clinton.

We have other doubles for other people.

That's where you come in.

Me? I-I don't look like anybody.

Meet Frank Stanford.

Tech entrepreneur.

He kinda looks like me.

I just have one question for you.

Are you ready to serve your country?

Country.

I just heard from Breanna. And Operation Cyber Cinderella is a go.

Is this the hero cask?

Yeah.

Good Lord.

Uh... That is disgusting. Where did you get that from?

- Bourbon Street. - Bourbon Street?

You do know what people do in these, right?

Yes, I know.

What did you... Can you just help me get ready and pour this in?

Tim, this is Richard Chance.

He's gonna be your handler at the judge's fundraiser.

I'm gonna keep you safe.

Richard is a counterfeit operative, just like you.

He's impersonating a prominent lawyer named Harry Wilson.

- What happened to him? - You don't wanna know.

The key is to project confidence.

Once people see your face, they're gonna assume you're the smartest,

most powerful person in the room.

So you just have to pretend you are.

The rest is a piece of cake.

Ooh, uh, I don't really do carbs.

It's my mom.

- Are you sure he's up for this? - Yeah.

With that face? All we gotta do is prep him.

No, no, no. They-They can't just barge in like that.

You-You still live there.

Yeah.

All right. Did you remember to take your pills?

I'm picking up hints of, uh, cedar.

So you have nine more of these?

Yes, nine more of these in a secure location.

But they are $20,000 apiece.

I'm in.

Now, I'm going to tell you something.

I am going to sell these by tomorrow, okay?

I have other interested buyers.

Well, then I better be first.

- We had a deal. - No, no, no, no. How...

What are you doing here?

You didn't return my calls so I tracked you down to your little hidden treasure.

No, no, no. I will sell you every cask I have.

Do you have the cash?

Why don't you come to my fundraiser tomorrow?

I'll give it to you then.

I'll text you the address.

It has to be tomorrow.

Don't worry.

I'm good for it.

Musky.

Hmm.

Okay, let's go again.

And this time, could you not cough on me?

- Sorry. - Don't apologize. Okay?

Frank does not apologize or admit when he is wrong.

Sorry.

I mean, not sorry.

Let's take it from the top without the script.

You know this guy.

You know what he wants.

Right, right. Okay, uh, what is my mouse?

What is my mouse?

- All right. - Okay.

I am the judge.

You want me to throw the case away.

You have a big bag of cash. Go!

Uh, your judgeship, uh,

- could you please help me-- - Stop, stop, stop. No.

You gotta stop saying please. Okay?

You have to pretend that you are a white guy from Silicon Valley

who only plays basketball with other white guys and a handful of Asian dudes.

Uh, I am more of a skateboarder.

Okay, you know what? Maybe you are not up to this after all.

Let's take five.

Richard, why don't you show Tim our water feature?

That...

Yeah, I don't... I don't... I don't understand that.

I don't get that at all, okay.

I have been wearing Frank... Tim-Tim's face for the past two days.

And I have money and jobs and ski chalets raining down on me.

This guy... This... That-That guy, he's born with that face.

All he has to do is act the part.

Why is he so bad at this?

I can see you're having feelings.

You know, I've learned from my puppets that it's okay to be angry.

But I don't think taking it out on Tim will help.

You're right. He doesn't know the power he has.

That just means we have to show him, okay?

Okay.

What happened to values?

What happened to right and wrong?

I mean, when I married my Marlon...

Can you get his...

And I was a law clerk, and he was a superior court judge.

I knew family values and faith would be the key to our lives

and our success together.

Well, he certainly looks the part.

Good job.

Tim's button cam is a go.

Okay, let's catch ourselves a corrupt judge.

Tim, you're up.

I don't think I can do this.

I'm pretty sure I cleaned that dude's pool.

No, no. You have never cleaned his pool.

You know why? 'Cause you're Frank Stanford.

All right? Believe you belong, everyone else will too.

Completely different fragrance profile.

Judge Gannon. Frank Stanford.

Nice to finally meet you in person.

You know, you're gonna have to come by my loft in Tribeca sometime.

I'm picky about the vibes in my East Coast circle, but after coming here,

- I can tell you know how to throw a party. - Oh.

Well, thank you very much.

Rick says you're a visionary.

I cannot wait to hear more.

Oh, and I see that you also got my text

about the amount to join my "Winner's Circle."

It's all here.

I have to make the rounds.

Meet me in my office in fifteen.

It's just around the corner on the left.

- What's he doing? - What?

Steve Pointer. He cannot blow my cover with Marlene.

He still thinks I'm a doomsday militia guy.

It's Frank, right? Frank Stanford.

We've, uh, we met before.

Marlene's video meeting?

It's okay, Tim. This is Steve Pointer.

He is also in the 3D printing biz.

Confidence covers cluelessness.

Yeah, it's, uh, Steve, right?

You know, I was just wondering, as, uh, someone in the industry,

how you and your investors are navigating all the new international tariffs?

It's okay. Breathe.

Well, you know, being on the forefront of 3D printing innovation,

you gotta be a predator.

Like an eagle.

What's an eagle's first question?

What's my mouse?

And then it locks in on it. No distractions.

And at the right moment, it strikes.

You know, I've had my doubts about you.

But now I see that you get it.

To succeed in this business you gotta be a disruptor. Like an eagle.

You know, you-you can't wait for permission.

You gotta swoop in.

Break things now and ask for forgiveness later.

Fist bump.

For capitalism.

Okay, Tim.

Time to carry that confidence into the judge's office.

Break things now.

Ask for forgiveness later.

It's bribe time.

Tim's gone.

So is the cash.

Where did he go? What's going on?

I told you he wasn't trustworthy.

Steve's talking the judge's ear off.

- You think he spooked Tim? - Looks that way.

It's time to broom Steve before he convinces the judge to walk away.

All right. My bots are reporting for duty.

I can flood the forums with criticism of Steve's company, spook the day traders.

Tim's gone dark. His button cam is offline.

Okay, where's our runaway?

Yeah, I'm following the money, and it's still at the party.

Wait.

Tim's making a phone call to Eastway Bank?

- Your Frankenstein's run amok. - Watch the feeds.

I'm heading to the party.

I think I know what Tim is up to.

Um, the manager of The Eastway Bank owes me a favor.

I'm gonna call him.

Eliot and I will keep the judge hooked.

Find Tim.

Get him back in the fold.

Excuse me.

Yeah. Okay.

- Uh, I need... I need to take this. - Yes.

What the hell? Wait. Why-Why is this happening?

What? What? How's...

Steve's clear for now.

Time to fan the flames.

I don't think we've met.

Are you some kind of critic?

Constance Bowling.

Certified bourbon steward.

Fancy title.

Hmm, we Brits, we love our titles.

Actually, I'm looking to start my own label.

Oh. Well, you know, it's-it's not as easy as it looks.

It's easier to start fresh than change people's negative opinion,

don't you think?

Excuse me.

You've got Frank.

Let's go live soon.

Uh, can you get the paperwork together? I-I have the money right now.

Are you still there?

Hello?

Hey, Tim. It's Agent Chance. I know you're in there.

I called the bank and I followed the hold music.

Look, Tim, I'm really sorry that the bank is foreclosing on your mother's house.

I really am.

But you can't use that bag of cash to pay it off.

We're DCI, man.

We're the Division of Counterfeit Identities.

You think we use legal tender?

Think it through.

I had to do something.

So you just figured you'd steal from Uncle Sam?

It's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission.

Come on out of there. Your country still needs you.

No. No way.

Oh, it might be a while, buddy.

I'm hearing noises.

Steve's still here.

He's having a complete meltdown.

We have to keep him away from Marlene.

Can't you handle him?

He still thinks I'm the doomsday weirdo, and the judge thinks I'm Cask-iana Jones.

Oh, stop whining.

I once played five characters in the basement of the Louvre.

- Now go on. Here he comes. - I'm just-- I'm not--

- You-- - Go.

All right.

Hey, buddy. Yeah.

What are you doing here?

Well, I saw you from across the room and I just...

I wanted to apologize. Sometimes I have...

episodes that, you know...

It's hard to find a good therapist when you live in a bunker.

No, I mean, what is a doomsday prepper doing at a judge's fundraiser?

Well, listen, man,

justice is a thin strand that keeps the walls of chaos from bursting open.

Am I right?

Let me show you something that's very, very dear to me.

Whoa.

No. I'll show you. Stay here.

- Don't move. - Dude.

- Sophie... Damn it! - Oh, I'm really enjoying this.

Oh. Your Honor.

Billy.

How do you know Steve?

Oh, Stephen. Boy Scouts.

As a matter of fact, I remember that is where I found my first cask.

- Oh. - A ghost town in Yuma.

I have a rattlesnake bite. I will show you.

- Here. - Oh. Not here.

Not here?

Speaking of casks--

I'm trying to get you the cash.

Well, you are running out of time.

T.J., he's wandering again.

Hi, my love.

Just go right on back there.

There you go.

Don't go.

Okay.

He's my banker.

Look, something's going on here.

What-What were you talking to the judge about?

She wants a spot in the damn bunker.

I told her there's no more room unless you have surgical training.

You don't have surgical training, do you, guy?

What is wrong with you?

Uh, hey, Tim.

Tim, Special Agent Franklin.

Why didn't you just tell us what was going on?

Well, what were you gonna do about it?

Mom's medical bills, they left her broke. It's-It's how the system works.

I've been listening to all this self-help stuff trying to get rich.

You see how that worked out.

And now I've ruined everything.

- You can do this, Tim. - I can't.

The judge, she's gonna take one look at me and know I'm a fraud.

You're not a fraud, buddy. You're not a fraud.

You were born to do this.

I'm a pool cleaner, and I'm not even good at that.

We ain't gonna convince this guy.

- You lived inside his face. - We don't have time.

- It's gotta come from you. Come on. - All right.

Hey, Tim, um, the algorithm, it chose you for a reason.

You have a face and other attributes,

uh, that-that make you trustworthy and successful.

Uh, someone that can make a difference.

Like Frank.

Yeah, don't you see?

You're the same.

You're all the same.

You're right.

Math picked me.

And math is never wrong.

No. Let's go with that.

Maybe I can do it.

Yeah.

Tim's out. We're back on track.

Okay.

Anybody got eyes on Steve?

Frank.

- Where have you been? - Work emergency.

Cost containment. Burn rate. You know how it is.

- Should we make a deal? - What do you need me to do?

Get this ghost gun case to settle and, for that,

you get this bag of $200,000

for your campaign or whatever.

Do we have a deal?

Hmm.

You think you could pull one over on me?

What are you doing here?

He's trying to take me down.

Oh. You-You don't think I know who is tanking my stock?

And now he's trying to mess with my case.

What are you talking about?

You don't think I know your little friends, huh?

Philip and Dennis?

They led the charge. You know what?

You can't take that.

Now this is evidence, pal.

Evidence with your fingerprints and DNA.

And I think I'm gonna, um,

I'm gonna call the FBI and tell them about your little attempted bribe here.

I think I'm gonna drop it off to them now. Is that okay with you, Judge Gannon?

Oh. Lord, yes. Thank you for saving me.

Well, somebody has to uphold the integrity of the judicial system.

You're going down, Stanford.

- ...never trusted that stupid-- - I've been looking for you.

We gotta finish this conversation about the reckoning.

- Oh, my God. - No?

I don't wanna join you in your bunker.

You guys actually spooked this guy into thinking a fake CEO is out to get him.

All right. Who's got an idea?

Feel free to say 'em out loud.

I did my part.

Do you have any drought-tolerant trees?

I'm thinking zen garden meets Tuscan landscape.

Well, this is going great.

Special Agent Finch, thanks for meeting me on such short notice.

Where do I start?

Um, so this, uh, uh, uh, tech CEO, Frank Stanford, right...

And-And I'm in the middle of this bogus lawsuit,

and he's trying to take my company down,

so what does he try to do?

He tries to bribe the judge.

- What the-- - What?

Oh! What? That is not supposed to be in there.

Hey, man, I've been looking for you.

We gotta finish this conversation about the reckoning. No?

Oh, my God. I don't wanna join you in your bunker.

No. No, no, no. No, no, no.

I-I'm reporting a crime.

Actually I make these. Uh, CovertCraft.com.

Then why are you trying to bribe me?

Bribe you?

What-- What are you-- What are you talking about?

I'm on your jury.

Juror number five, the landscape architect,

he's been taking notes.

No, no, Mr. Pointer. Thank you for the tip.

I'm gonna text you an address where you can meet with a special agent.

Excuse me. I gotta take another call.

Thank you for holding, sir.

Yes, the Sultan would like a water feature. All cash.

I'll send you an address where you can meet with the house manager.

Okay. Thi-This was a setup. This was a setup.

I was... I was set up by them.

They did this. Wait... That...

That guy lives in a bunker.

What?

Not sure how I feel about just letting this guy run.

Well, 911 response time is seven minutes

- in this neighborhood. - Don't move!

- I called them. - Stop!

Aw. Too bad Harry had to stay away from this.

Hands behind your back.

- He'll get his day in court. - I got him.

Thank you.

Ladies and gentlemen, I've just learned there has been improper conduct

between a party to this case and a member of the jury.

I'm afraid I have no choice but to declare a mistrial.

Thank you all for your service.

I cannot believe you let this happen to me.

You just can't go around bribing jurors, Mr. Pointer.

Wait. Marlene! Marlene.

Come on. My middle name's Merrick.

I sure hope you vote for me.

Well, looks like you are gonna get a new judge and a fair shot at justice.

I don't know how to thank you.

Here, take that case.

It's a foreclosure.

- Mm-hmm. - Timothy Notelius?

Turns out the lender didn't file the right paperwork

when they sold and resold his mom's mortgage.

Maybe you can get a rescission?

It's a shame.

She's gonna be back here tomorrow getting perfectly legal bribes.

Yeah, well, you can't change the law.

But the law also says that she has to run for reelection.

And the problem with being a judge that likes to wag their finger at immorality,

one little scandal, it's over.

Okay. What... What is going on here?

Can you explain this photo of your pool cleaner leaving your fundraiser with,

what appears to be, a bag of money?

Looks like some kind of hanky-panky is going on here.

Good Lord.

That man is not my pool cleaner.

That man is Frank Stanford, a tech CEO.

And the reason he is leaving my house with a bag of money

is because I threatened to call the police because he tried to bribe me.

But I can't be bought.

What do I stand for? Come here and I'll show you.

That's right. Keep going, keep going.

You gotta get my good side.

Manners, merit, morals. Right?

So print that in your story along with your apology.

No more questions.

That's him!

Well, that's absurd.

Marlon. Oh, my Lord.

I don't know why he's in swim trunks, but I have nothing to do with him.

Thank you so much.

- But there's a photo. - All right, I'm just gonna...

The door is stuck.

Get it... Mar... Marlon!

- Sometimes he gets confused. - Well, he's serving his country after all.

All while wearing those slippery sandals. Hmm.

"Frank Stanford, one of the nation's boldest entrepreneurs,

tragically died Sunday in a heli-skiing accident in Alaska."

He was a risk-taker.

Hmm, let me guess, the condolences are just pouring in.

Well, in lieu of flowers, I had 'em make donations to victims of gun violence.

See? Something good came of you playing digital god.

No. My puppet master days are over.

You had the world at your fingertips, not Tim.

That should give you some perspective.

More like confusion.

It's true.

Tim has a face that makes angel investors sing.

But it's not enough, is it?

One has to be shameless.

To swear that your gun isn't a gun, it's just a kit.

Or that your magic box can create anything.

Fortune favors the beautiful, but it can also be cruel to the sincere.

The Tims of this world.

Worshipping the liars, wanting to become them.

I would say "cry me a river" for Tim, but, uh, no, yeah, I see your point.

Well, I learned something from this.

No matter how much technology changes, one thing stays the same.

What's that?

The ultimate con.

It's just two people sitting at the same table

having two completely different conversations.

That I will drink to.

No.

Yeah.

Peter Luna, he trawls oncology wards,

looking for patients who have just been given a terminal diagnosis.

Death is such a sad, wasteful event.

I've single-handedly monetized the entire process, from the moment my client dies,

through their seven years of cold storage.

- We should Christmas carol him. - Let's give this guy hell.

Well, I hate to be the bearer of bad news,

but people have a right to decide what to do with their body after they die.

What if I said I wanted to be taxidermied like...

I would respect your choice.

Probably never come back here again.