Original subtitles

(SIREN WAILING)

(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING)

WOMAN: They are like animals.

The items they post you...

(GASPS)

WOMAN: You're head of town.

If I'm going to die, can I at least take this off?

The headline wouldn't be good.

What?

Eve?

Stand up.

Eve? How did you find me?

Stand up. Put your hands up.

Take that off.

What are you now,

an assassin?

What are you now, a mayor?

(LAUGHS)

(SCREAMS)

(GROANS)

Why did you do that?

That was for Kenny.

Tell me how to find Helene.

You can't just find someone like her.

I don't even know myself.

They keep everyone separate.

(GROANS)

If you find a new recruit then maybe you can track them back.

What does that mean?

She looks out for new assassins. That's part of her job.

Like a talent scout.

- Give me a name. - I don't have a name.

Villanelle pushed the last one under a train.

Give me that name.

- You shot me in my hand. - Oh, get over it.

What is she like? Helene? What does she look like?

She looks French.

She looks French. Okay?

If you want to find Helene, why not just ask Villanelle?

You're going to die, you know?

Whatever this is, you won't come out of it.

Thank God.

VILLANELLE: (SINGING) ♪ You made a believer

♪ Out of me

♪ I'm moving on up now

♪ Yeah, I'm out of the darkness

♪ My light shines on

♪ My light shines on

♪ My light shines on ♪

Have I ever told you? You sound like an angel.

Only sound like?

BARBARA: Oi, Little Miss Perfect.

Cat's been sick on the carpet next door again.

I'll deal with it.

It's chunky.

I said, I'll deal with it.

I don't know how you do it.

I sprinkle a highly absorbent powder on top.

I meant I don't know how you can be so good all the time.

I don't have any other choice.

(SIGHS)

(MACHINE BEEPS)

Rhian Bevan.

I brought you a protein shake.

Are you stereotyping me?

Oh, God, you're right. I'm so sorry.

- I'll get rid of it. - No, I...

- I'd like... - Hmm.

I don't wanna waste it. Cos it was leg day today.

- Leg day? - Yes, leg day.

- Are you looking at my ass? - Yes.

EVE: God, real life is boring.

Who are we protecting today?

You know, I'm gonna give it an hour

and then I'm gonna follow up on that Helene lead.

Er, before I forget, I have some admin for you.

This is a written warning from work about your continued absence.

Don't worry, I got one as well.

You were supposed to be covering for me. Where were you?

I got invited to a threesome in the Cotswolds.

Well, the Cotswolds is supposed to be lovely.

Next, please.

Another invitation?

This one looks a little anthrax-ey.

She's not given up.

EVE: I don't think so.

(SIGHS)

- What? - You shot someone?

In the hand.

How did it feel?

Like you said it would feel.

- Wanna have sex? - Yes.

- Gonna buy me dinner afterwards? - Yes. If you're any good.

DAVID: At 2:00, you're judging a sand sculpting competition,

at 3:30, you're explaining British culture

to some local school children.

And this evening, you're going to see a play

about the horrors of the Spanish Civil War...

"Humankind

"cannot bear very much reality."

Do you know who wrote that?

Gandhi?

(PHONE RINGING)

MAN ON PHONE: There's a Mr. Smith downstairs for you.

Gracias.

Tell him I'll be right down.

(GROANS)

I can't promise I'll do any of it

but if I do, I shan't be sober.

(DOOR CLOSING)

YUSUF: Classic, ketchup, mustard.

Please.

- Pickles? Onions? - Pickles, yes. Of course pickles.

Mustard? Mayo?

- No! Mayonnaise? - Mustard. Yes, mayo.

- Top and bottom. - You're a psychopath.

- This is pretty good. - It's vegan.

The bacon, too.

- Huh? - (CHUCKLES) Knew that would piss you off.

Hmm.

The funeral home Rhian Bevan's body was taken to.

How did you get this?

Got an old mate from the Foreign Legion.

I saw him do some pretty terrible things to civilians and I never said anything.

Now he works with TFO, and it's all paid off.

Mmm.

Ah, see, let your guard down.

(BOTH GRUNTING)

- See, that's good. I... - Now is it good?

- How about this? - Okay.

(CHUCKLES)

(GRUNTS)

EVE: Oh.

Anyone? Anyone else wanna try me? No?

Don't get cocky now. Cos I'll come back and do the armbar

- and take you down. - (EVE LAUGHS)

Thanks, David.

You can have a break.

What do you have for me?

Jakub Novotny.

He was found two weeks ago in a disused warehouse

on the outskirts of Prague.

You said he was tortured?

Flayed alive.

Whoever did this, literally tore strips off him.

There are pictures...

This reminds me of something.

- String cheese. - Yes.

Just that. Is this all you have?

I told you, it's not my investigation.

The BIS don't get involved in murder cases

unless they're of national security concern.

Cultural attache.

We both know that's code for "kicked out on your ass".

I could say the same about you.

You were my most promising student.

Well, you know my daughter died,

- just like... - Yes. I remember.

Grief makes us strangers,

even to ourselves.

Carolyn!

Just... Excuse me for a moment, Milos.

Shoo, shoo, shoo.

HUGO: Easy, easy.

Aren't you going to congratulate me?

On what?

Did you not get the fax?

I got promoted.

Apparently there was an unexpected vacancy on the Russia desk.

It's actually amazing the kind of leverage you get from being shot at work.

Wait. Wait, where are you going?

(SPEAKING SPANISH)

(MAN SPEAKING IN SPANISH)

You can't ignore this, Carolyn. This is your final warning.

No. This is your final warning.

The Twelve are far more lethal than any of the hostile states

or terrorist organisations that you care so much about

and I am your best hope in understanding them.

If you choose to ignore my expertise,

then either they've got to you before me

or you're more dim-witted than I thought you were.

Or you're just desperate.

Stop meddling.

Cos if you don't, you know what will happen.

You'll be arrested, tried in a secret court

and put in prison for a long, long, long time.

We will make sure of it.

Is that so?

Nice little jobs in the sun are for those who behave nicely,

not those of us who still invite Czech intelligence on a beach holiday

when they've just been fired.

What exactly are you going to arrest me for?

If you hang on, I can show you.

That was you, wasn't it?

Paul Bradwell.

You need some cream for that sunburn.

You look inflamed.

I'm going.

- I'm going. - Muchos gracias.

Wow, more fish and loaves!

You know, you don't have to live exactly as they did in the Bible.

You can be guided by your own instincts.

It's better for me to have a road map.

Dad?

For what we are about to receive,

may the Lord make you thank me.

- Amen. - MAY: Amen.

(HISSING)

- Lucifer, no! - PHIL: Leave him, May, she's okay.

Lucifer, we talked about this.

I'm so sorry.

She needs to realise this is your home too now.

Hmm.

May, Nelle has to find her own place at some point.

She won't want to stay here forever.

It's fine by me.

Well, even if she doesn't live with us anymore,

she's being baptised tomorrow.

Once she's baptised, she's part of the family.

I've always wanted a family.

Fish?

I thought we agreed you were going to widen your horizons.

Find some interests away from the church.

Well, you wanted me to have a friend my own age

now I have one.

PHIL: Nelle isn't exactly what I had in mind.

MAY: Why? Because she's too perfect?

(CHOIR SINGING "ABIDE WITH ME")

Wow.

(SIGHS) So holy.

Let me have a new life.

Please.

(MEOWS)

Come on. (CLICKS TONGUE) Come here.

(CLICKS TONGUE)

Come on.

That's it. See?

- Hmm? (SIGHS) - (MEOWS)

There's nothing to be scared of.

We're all friends here.

- (HISSES AND MEOWS) - (SCREAMS)

(WATER SPLASHING)

- (DOOR OPENS) - (GASPS)

Can you stroke my hair?

Now, tell me why you like me so much.

MAY: You're kind,

you're funny.

(CHUCKLES)

You're generous.

You're clever.

You're understanding,

loyal.

You're the best person I've ever met.

Hmm.

(MOBILE RINGING)

Hey, what's up?

YUSUF: Don't be pissed off. She made me drive her here.

(EVE PANTING)

Whatever it is, no.

Hmm.

I was about to give you a compliment.

You look purposeful. Less untethered.

It suits you.

Thank you.

There's been a spate of murders,

all of them tortured, none of them solved.

The first victim was someone in Paul's phone book,

the second was linked to the first

and the third I suspect is something similar.

Someone has been hunting down and killing members of The Twelve.

That means they know a damn sight more than we do about who they are,

which, in turn, makes me want to know them.

Unfortunately, my avenues of investigation have recently been cut off.

So I need you to take up my good work and continue the investigation.

Carolyn...

(CHUCKLES) We've been here before.

I'm hardly asking for a kidney, Eve.

But if I am, I'm offering a slice of lung in return.

You're clearly still looking into them.

Why else would you be working for a private security firm?

The people are nice.

I'll pay.

For access, I mean...

Money's not a problem.

I have an unfashionable amount of inherited wealth

and absolutely nothing to spend it on.

You're still playing the same old game of chess.

So what game are you playing?

EVE: See, this is what I'm talking about.

I want to sweep the chessboard off the table

and set it on fire.

I want to watch those little wooden critters burn.

Keep the file.

You might find you need to know the critters before you incinerate them.

You're kidding me.

YUSUF: You want the file, don't you? You want the file?

Of course I want the file.

- YUSUF: You stink. - You love it.

So, after the sermon,

I'll lead you over to the font

and present you to the congregation...

"Our Lord Jesus Christ has told us

"that to enter the kingdom of Heaven..."

BOTH: "We must be born again of water and the Spirit

"and has given us baptism

"as the sign and seal of this new birth.

"Here we are washed by the Holy Spirit."

Of course. You know it already.

Clearly, I'm surplus to requirements.

Let's jump to after you've baptised me.

"May God, who has received you by baptism into his Church,

"pour upon you the riches of His grace."

May, come here.

Here.

My guest needs to sit here.

What guest?

May, does it matter? Nelle,

we don't reserve seats here.

Well, I-I can't reserve a seat at my own party?

Vicar! Vicar!

Barbara, I'm just running Nelle through the baptism service.

Can I really not reserve a seat at my own party?

- Vicar. You're gonna wanna see this - In a minute, Barbara.

BARBARA: Lucifer.

Please, Nelle.

Explain why you were in the graveyard with a shovel.

The cat was dead when I found it.

I went out late last night to hand out some blankets to the homeless

and I... I saw it lying on the side of the road...

- Squashed. - Why didn't you tell us?

(EXHALES) Because you loved it.

Nelle, are you sure you're ready for baptism?

I saved you a pretty gory burial.

One of the eyes was not where it should've been.

It's not just Lucifer.

It's the fact that you've been here for months

and we hardly know anything about you.

I was born in Russia,

abandoned in an orphanage, then sold into slavery...

And you seem more interested in someone seeing you being baptised

rather than the baptism itself.

If you're baptised in a forest and nobody sees you getting baptised,

are you really baptised?

Do you believe in God?

I believe that people who believe in God

are good people for me to be around.

Nelle, I can't baptise someone who doesn't have faith.

- I have faith. - But...

I have faith that I'm not as shitty inside

as some people think I am.

And that I can prove them wrong.

But only if you baptise me.

How can I help?

Well, I wanted to ask you a couple of questions about...

I totally understand. Please, take a seat.

Oh. Oh, oh.

Okay.

There you are. A throne for a princess.

We have plans suitable for every budget...

Actually, I'm not looking to arrange a funeral.

I wanted to ask a question about one you did a while ago.

Rhian Bevan?

- I'm an old teacher of hers and... - Pam!

Pam!

- Can't you just maybe look into... - I'm business, okay?

She's...

"Other."

- Hi, there. Are... - Hi.

Welcome to J. Palmeira and Son. Please, this way.

(ATMOSPHERIC MUSIC PLAYING)

♪♪♪♪

(MUSIC STOPS)

Er, your colleague let me in.

I was hoping to ask about one of the people (CLEARS THROAT) you had in here.

Rhian Bevan?

She was hit by a train?

I taught her when she was a teenager.

EVE: Do you remember who was here to send her off?

You must've had a point of contact for her?

No?

Hmm.

I suppose...

Could you maybe go and check?

(SIGHS)

Thank you so much.

(INTENSE MUSIC PLAYING)

Nothing.

Never mind.

I'll get in touch another way.

Do you know Helene?

Sorry about that.

(PEOPLE CHATTERING INDISTINCTLY)

(DOOR CLOSING)

(PERSON COUGHING)

The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ,

the love of God and the fellowship

of the Holy Spirit be with you all...

ALL: And also with you.

Baptism marks the beginning of a journey with God

as I, er...

Which continues for the rest of our lives.

It's a joyous occasion,

the beginning of a new life.

A life where Jesus walks by our side...

Do it now.

Therefore I ask, do you turn away from sin?

I do.

Do you reject evil?

I do.

Do you turn to Christ...

I do.

...as your saviour?

Do you trust?

Just dunk me!

YUSUF: There are some decent leads in here.

She's just the kind of girl they'd recruit.

Disempowered, disenfranchised, disposable...

Another "D" word.

- Disadvantaged. - Yes, good.

Plus, she likes dead people.

Have you ever thought she might just be unusual?

Sorry, disusual.

Uh-uh.

No. This was different.

The look in her eye,

it was...

I've, er, seen it before.

I can't... I can't explain it.

That was an expert analysis.

Can you put your shirt on?

Oh? Just because, I'm not, what, jumping to all your conclusions?

EVE: Yes, actually.

I don't want to see your nipples unless they're fully in agreement with me.

Okay. How about now?

Well, now I just want nuts.

Well, they're all gone.

Hmm.

Wait. Wait, I'm sorry, I can't fulfil your insatiable need for nuts?

EVE: No, I really want nuts, actually.

EVE: Hello?

I forgive you.

What?

I said I forgive you.

You forgive me?

For not attending my rebirth.

Uh-huh.

Okay,

er, I understand it might be painful for you to see me blossoming.

Oh, is that what you're doing?

I'm trying to show you I've changed.

You're the same person. You're exactly the same...

I'm not here to argue, Eve.

Maybe I've changed. Have you thought of that?

Maybe I don't need...

What are you doing?

Praying for you.

Oh.

Dear Jesus,

please let Eve find faith...

I don't need your help.

I need you to leave me alone...

Let her be who she really is inside.

Give her courage, give her strength...

Don't you understand?

Save her like you saved me. (CHUCKLES)

If you'd really changed,

you wouldn't have come here.

If you'd really changed, you wouldn't have let me.

(GASPS)

Different person.

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING)

(PAM SCREAMS)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC CONTINUES)

(MUSIC ENDS)

Found her!

VILLANELLE: Hello?

I said hello.

Is anybody there?

You know, it would be much, much easier

(CHUCKLES)

if you just showed me you were real.

A little wave?

(SIGHS) Maybe you don't know.

Yeah.

but it's very much in your interest

for me to believe in you.

(SCOFFS)

I knew you weren't real.

MAY: I'm sorry your guest didn't come.

She doesn't believe I'm a Christian.

(CHUCKLES)

- Well... - She thinks I'm pretending.

No one could pretend as well as that.

Not even the best actress in the world.

Depends on the audience.

Well, this audience knows you.

She knows you'd never hurt anyone...

You don't know me.

(MAY SCREAMS)

(GASPING) No!

(PANTING)

(GASPS)

No! No!

Oh, no, no.

(GRUNTING AND PANTING)

(GASPS)

(PANTING)

Oh, my God. Are you okay? Huh?

Huh?

(SHUSHES)

(SHUSHES)

Oh. I didn't kill you.

Vlad.

Hello, traitor.

(DOOR CLOSING)

Huh?

Are you who I think you are?

What can I say?

I'm as surprised as you.

Oh!

Er...

So, what happens now?

Oh, easy.

I lead you to salvation.

Hmm?

(♪ MOTHER'S BEEN A BAD GIRL PLAYING)

(♪ MOTHER'S BEEN A BAD GIRL RESUMES)