Original subtitles

ANNOUNCER [ON TV]: New from Krank Co., the Cosmo Flyer!

Awesome.

ANNOUNCER: With the Cosmo Flyer, the sky's the limit.

It's up, up and away.

For fim-foobly fun.

| can't think of a toy more fun for a child...

...or one more dangerous.

Just ask Timmy Snyder.

[WHIMPERING]

[BOARD MEMBERS GASP]

Or Reece Jones, who went on a wild ride over three counties...

...before authorities could save him.

The Cosmo Flyer is yet another in a long line of unsafe products from Krank Co...

...the same people who brought us the Krank-Bots...

..and the Zoom-Pets.

[BOY AND GIRL YELL]

Flame-retardant, they weren't.

Today, | am happy to report that thanks to the efforts...

...of Wayne Industries’ Project Safety Net...

..the doors of Gotham-based Krank Co. have been permanently shut.

KRANK [ON SPEAKER]: You thought my toys were dangerous before, Wayne?

Krank?

Well, get a load of the new model. It's doo-diddly deadly.

[ALL YELLING]

Can Bruce come out and play? No?

Oh, he's buried under a building? Aw.

You like playing with toys, Krank? Try mine.

Broke your toy, boo-hoo.

[GRUNTS]

Refills sold separately.

[GROWLS]

Whoa! Dipsy doodles.

COMPUTER: Autopilot on.

[GRUNTS]

[CHUCKLES]

| own your weak Bat buit.

GORDON: When Krank finds out you survived, Mr. Wayne...

...e's sure to try again.

That's why I'm assigning you around-the-clock police protection.

-| really don't think that's necessary. -It's not open for debate, Mr. Wayne.

| won't allow Gotham's favorite son to be harmed on my watch.

Thank you, Commissioner Gordon.

Let me introduce you to your shadow.

Cash Tankenson, the last line of defense you'll ever need.

Hey, Freddy. How about some more of those nachos?

Extra jalapefios this time.

Straight away, Detective Shades.

Yo, Wayne, you're supposed to be some kind of billionaire bachelor.

So where's the party?

The night is still young, detective.

Call me Cash. Because I'm not just your bodyguard, Wayne...

...l'm your wingman.

Yeah.

Cover for me, Alfred.

Time for the Batman to collar Krank SO we can send our houseguest home.

CASH: Hey, Freddy. ETA on the nachos.

Do hurry, sir.

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Let me guess. You're not expecting visitors.

[ALARM BEEPING]

Security breach.

Huh?

Special delivery. No doubt from Cosmo Krank.

Looks like the Cos don't know Cash spent a year on bomb squad.

No sign of a proximity fuse. Amateur hour.

Someone at the door, Alfred?

Stay back, Wayne. It's the Cash Tankenson Show now.

[CASH READING NOTE]

| don't get it.

[ROBOT BEEPING]

[SCREECHING]

[HISSING]

[GRUNTS]

-Careful, sir. -Freddy's right.

Leave the rough stuff to the professional. Who ordered the knuckle sandwich?

Extra knuckles.

[CASH GRUNTING]

[SQUAWKS]

Huh? Grr.

Have another serving.

[CASH GRUNTS]

[BRUCE GRUNTING]

[CASH GROANS]

[BRUCE GRUNTING]

BRUCE: Help.

-Get it off. -Grr.

It's payday.

[GROWLS THEN GRUNTS]

BRUCE: You got him.

[SIGHS]

Thanks, Cash. | owe you one.

Cash is as Cash does, man.

Dark night, isn't it?

| take your meaning, sir.

Uh, Master Bruce has an early meeting tomorrow.

Allow me to show you to the guest room.

That's not gonna work, Freddy. Cash has to keep Wayne in his sights at all times.

We're roomies, pal.

-Awesome. -And we just trashed a robot, compadre.

How can you be tired? Cash is pumped and ready to party.

[SNORING]

CASH: Get down!

Ah, just doing my job, Mr. President.

[SNORING]

[SIGHS]

BATMAN: Sorry I'm late, commissioner.

Krank made a second attempt on Bruce Wayne's life tonight.

| have a man guarding him, but | could really use your help.

Let me keep an eye on Wayne instead. | can catch Krank in the act.

No, your talents are best used in the field. We need to stop Krank--

Before he puts Wayne in danger again.

BATMAN: I'm on my way to Krank's factory, Alfred.

I'm hoping to find something the police missed.

Just buy me more time if Cash asks after me.

No worries there, sir. Your wingman is sleeping like a baby.

[SNORING]

Huh? Ahem.

Hey, Wayne. Which way to the john?

[BED SHEETS RUFFLE]

[GROANING]

[YAWNS]

Okay, here we go. Let's see.

Unh. Ah. Well.

Um, occupied?

Oh. Uh, sorry, Freddy.

[CASH SIGHS THEN SNORTS]

[DOOR OPENS THEN CLOSES]

[SIGHS]

Huh?

[RUMBLING]

[GROANING]

Surprise, Batman.

[YELLS]

[SNORING]

You must think Cash is pretty dumb.

Thought you could pull the wool over Cash's eyes, huh?

That's a negative.

| Know where you were.

You were out partying.

[SIGHS]

You got me, Cash. | don't know what to say. I--

Without your wingman.

You never, never leave your wingman.

You were sound asleep. | didn't want to disturb you.

| don't let many people in, Wayne.

Cash has got feelings too.

-Look, Cash-- -It's Detective Tankenson.

Only my friends call me Cash.

From now on, Mr. Wayne, we do this by the book.

Look, detective, | am really sorry | ran out on you...

-...but I'm just not used to-- -Hmm.

Not used to having a babysitter?

Well, get used to it now.

I'd rather have a wingman, Detective Tankenson.

My friends call me Cash.

So, Cash, think we could, uh, lose these now?

You know, the commish is kind of jittery about you being out in the open for this...

...park dedication ceremony.

| refuse to let a madman dictate how | live my life.

And I'm hoping Krank tries something so | can see the look on his face...

...when | take him down hard.

Back seat, Freddy. Cash Tankenson always drives.

-Are you certain this is a good idea, sir? -It's the only way, Alfred.

If | don't let Krank get to Bruce, the Batman doesn't get to Krank.

[WHIRRING]

It's Krank, look out.

[PANTING]

[GRUNTING]

How about we try on a pair of Cash Tankenson size 13's.

My toy.

Oh, uh, sorry, kid.

[WAILING]

Little help.

Wayne?

Wayne!

Hey, Bruce Wayne. Wanna go for a spin?

Come and get me, Krank.

[OFFICERS GRUNT]

CASH: Wayne.

[GRUNTS]

Help. Help.

[LAUGHING]

Wayne!

[PANTING]

Drop Wayne or Cash drops you.

KRANK: Whee!

Sorry, Cash, have to rely on another wingman.

[PANTING]

Police! I'm commandeering this vehicle.

[CIRCUS MUSIC PLAYING ON SPEAKER]

[GRUNTS]

No one shakes Cash Tankenson.

Welcome to Krankytown, Wayne.

The play land children will never get to enjoy...

...all because of you.

Maybe my toys weren't the safest, but they were fim-foobly fun.

And now you get to join my collection.

A little dip in my river of molten plastic, and voila...

...my very own limited-edition Bruce Wayne...

...non-action figure.

[LAUGHING]

What? Where's Wayne?

BATMAN: Safely on his way home.

[GRUNTS]

Time to put your toys away.

[THUDDING]

[GUN COCKS]

Freeze, toy-geek.

The Batman? Uh, where's Wayne?

Safely on his way home, apparently. But not for long.

[MACHINES WHIRRING]

With both of you out of the way for good, who will protect Wayne, hmm?

Zoom-Pets now come with extreme mangling action.

CASH: Here, kitty, kitty. Catnip time. Huh.

[GRUNTING]

Gotcha.

[LAUGHS]

Who's got who?

Oh, no.

Whoa!

KRANK: New from Krank Co... CASH: Unh.

...Battle-Damaged Detective.

Oh, Batman. Dipsy doodles?

[CASH WHIMPERING]

Come on, now, you can't turn Cash into a candle.

[PANTING]

| got my whole life ahead of me. Who's gonna care for my grandma?!

Aah! Oof.

Huh?

[SIGHS]

I'm done playing nice, Batman.

|-- Oh.

Where--? Where--? Where's my remote?

Here's why your toys need warning labels.

Some of this? Let's go. What?

No. What are you--? What are you doing?

No, Zoom-Pets, you can't do this, | created you!

[KRANK GRUNTING AND YELLING]

Uh, about the whole Cash-begging-for-his-life thing...

...uh, that never happened, right?

Detective, your assignment was to protect Bruce Wayne.

How do you explain Krank snatching him from right under your nose?

And where is Wayne? Do you even know?

Well, he's, uh, safely on his way home?

Actually, the detective had my back, commissioner.

Cash is as Cash does, sir.

[SIGHS]

| want your report on my desk first thing in the morning.

Hey, Wayne's a spoiled rich kid, but you, Bats, you're all right.

You need a wingman?

Hey.

That's cool. Cash prefers working alone.