Original subtitles

[music playing]

You need to hook me up with a good-looking

date for the awards ceremony.

And don't forget to make sure he's

blond so he matches my shoes.

And please, no B-listers.

I'm bored.

How long until we get to this place?

Don't worry.

We're almost there.

Hey.

What's up with all the dizzy-diz?

Oh.

[screaming]

I'm so glad I transferred to Mali-U. We you guys has made

this the best semester ever.

I found something.

Who knew paleontology could be this fun?

If you call clogged pores and chipped nails fun.

For some reason, our artifact doesn't

seem to want to come out. - Here.

Let me try.

[gasping]

Hey.

Not bad, Clover.

[gasping]

[bell ringing]

Years of ping pong competition.

It's all in the wrist. - I wish I was more like you.

You always seem to know exactly how to get the job done.

Really?

I'm surprised.

I've always been kind of jealous of you.

No way.

I should be super envious of you.

I'm always trying to live up to the legend of Alex.

[grunting]

Who doesn't want to be just like WOOHP's ultimate superspy?

Is she talking about our Alex?

Wow.

Thanks, Brit.

Hey.

It's T-Bone.

Huh?

Isn't he the greatest?

I know.

He's my fave singer and such a great actor.

Did you see his movie "Cruise Cafe?"

- Only 21 times. - Oh.

And he has the coolest catchphrase ever.

What you gonna do about it?

I guess we have more in common than we thought.

You're about to have something else in common--

a long weekend getaway.

You mean like a road trip?

Exactly.

It'll be a rehearsal for spring break.

And I know where we should go--

the Aqua Vitae Resort.

Located off the coast of Tamale Island,

the world's finest underwater hotel

is a vacation dream come true.

Ah.

I am totally in.

Aqua Vitae Resort.

I'd like to make a reservation for two rooms

with massages, hot stone treatments, chocolate facials.

Excuse me.

But are you any of the following-- movie

star, singer, or celebutante?

No, no, and almost.

Then you aren't welcome here.

The resort is for VIPs only with an emphasis on the V. Good day.

Looks like we'll be spending the weekend chilling

on the beach here at Mali-U. I guess

there are worse things in life.

I guess this is one of those worse things in life.

[screaming]

Jerry, when it comes to the WOOHP tunnel, three's company,

but four is totally a crowd.

Point taken.

Now I've brought you here for a matter

of the utmost importance.

Water levels around the world are rising at an alarming rate.

What's wrong with that?

The beach will be that much closer to our dorm.

Score.

Your positive outlook is refreshing.

But you girls must find out why this is happening.

[alarm going off]

Looks like we have a doubleheader.

Indeed.

There's a celebrity kidnapping epidemic.

This time, the intended target was

someone by the name of T-Bone.

T-Bone.

Apparently Mr. Bone was seeking inner peace

in a herbal, hydro meditation tank when someone

tried to drive off with it.

Luckily, he managed to escape. - Phew.

Still, we must find out why so many celebrities

have been abducted.

I'll need two of you to investigate this recent attack.

[sighing]

This is the perfect chance to meet T-Bone.

Please, Jer, we need this mission.

Very well. It's yours.

Now you'll all need some gadgets.

We're gonna meet T-Bone.

We're gonna meet T-Bone.

Here you go.

The Wind Tunnel 9,000, oxygen lipstick.

Ew.

This color is like so three seasons ago.

This lipstick is not a fashion accessory.

When applied to your lips, it allows

you to breathe underwater.

And here's the Destructo Ring cell phone.

It emits a sonic ringtone that can destroy anything it hits.

And no, it doesn't make personal calls.

Good luck, spies.

Thanks, Jer.

OK.

Here's your stop, T-Bone's Hollywood bungalow.

Where are you gonna land?

Were not landing.

We don't wanna disturb all the celebrities down there.

You'll be using the new WOOHP Plummet Pod.

Are you sure it's safe?

It worked perfectly in the lab.

Bon voyage, girls.

[screaming]

I probably shouldn't have eaten

that burrito before a mission.

Now I know what it feels like to be born a baby chick.

Hey.

If we were just born, that means we're kinda like sisters.

We're twinsie, but come on, sis.

I can't believe we're T-Bone's groupie pad.

[music playing]

Hey.

That's my fave T-Bone tune. (SINGING) You stole my heart,

then you took my parking spot.

Oh, baby, why?

It's T-Bone.

And he's chilling in a hot tub.

Yeah.

Nice wardrobe.

Your mother dress you?

No wonder you got kicked out of Teensicle.

T-Bone, I'm Alex.

And this is Britney.

And we're your biggest fans.

So what are you doing here?

Don't worry.

We were sent to check out that earlier attack on you.

Oh, that.

It's cool now.

Probably just an overly excited fan.

Yeah.

Aren't they the worst?

So do you have any questions or anything?

(LAUGHING) Could you do your catchphrase for us?

(COUGHING) It'll totally help us out with our investigation.

Well, if it'll help.

What you gonna do about it?

Oh.

Wow.

That hot tub is intense.

Celebrities have the coolest things.

Hey.

Help me.

Don't worry, T-Bone.

We've got your back.

I always wanted to be in a hot tub with T-Bone,

but not like this.

Time for the oxygen lipstick.

Wait.

That's not my color.

I'm more of an autumn.

[screaming]

Those cabanas are so rad.

Nothing like some prime beachfront property.

But those cabanas used to be on top of a hill.

So unless someone moved them--

huh?

The island is becoming submerged.

But how?

Check it out.

Sometimes nature looks even better in person than on TV.

There shouldn't be any waterfalls on this island.

This waterfall is man-made.

You're right.

It's faker than Mandy's hair color.

Hey.

Stop.

We need to talk to you.

Why is there a bellhop underneath a fake waterfall?

Wow.

That's like the deep existential riddle where the answer

leads to more questions.

One semester of Philosophy 101,

and you get all flaky on me.

OK.

What's the deal with this waterfall?

And your look?

Hotel employee chic is totally played out.

I really hate it when they run.

[grunting]

We got you.

Might as well give up.

Or maybe not.

[screaming]

So much for my leave-in conditioner.

Looks like we got ourselves a souvenir from our mission.

Let's head back to WOOHP and see if Jerry can help figure out

what's going on here.

(SCREAMING) T-Bone, don't leave us.

Whoa.

Whoa.

What a rush.

Man, this place has got it going on.

Welcome to the Aqua Vitae Resort, where

the celebrity is always right.

First-class accommodations, five-star entertainment.

What more do you need?

Try to think of the resort as your new home.

This must be a perk from the studio head.

Yeah.

Now that's what I'm talking about.

I thought hot tubs were supposed to make you feel good.

We've got to find T-Bone.

This time, they got him.

[grunting]

Looks like they got us too.

Maybe not.

We've got the Destructo Ring Cell Phone.

Ah.

So either we're out of a service area,

or the WOOHP technicians didn't make them waterproof.

Don't move, Alex.

The water keeps rising.

I've never seen anything like it.

It's the same on the island.

There were giant tubes pumping water to the surface.

But we found this.

One of the guys behind the flooding was wearing it.

That's odd.

The hat is made with material from the WOOHP prison sewing

room.

A sewing room in a prison?

Must be really popular. - Not really.

In fact, only one of our prisoners ever went in there.

You might remember Captain Hayes.

It seems he used the sewing machines to make replicas

of famous movie costumes.

But he's still locked up, right?

No.

He also used the sewing machines to make a replica

of a prison guard's uniform.

It was so realistic.

Jerry, we've been kidnapped.

Where are they?

Don't worry.

This WOOHP signal tracker has locked in on their coordinates.

They're at the Aqua Vitae Resort.

What?

That's so unfair.

I couldn't even get a reservation.

Something tells me they're not vacationing.

Off you go, girls.

I have a vehicle that will get you there in no time.

- This is ridiculous. - Hey.

When mingling with celebs, you have to dress for success.

It's the law.

Girls, you are approaching the Aqua Vitae Resort.

One problem, Jer.

How are we gonna get in there?

It's VIP only.

It's all taken care of.

I've made some special arrangements.

So much for the red carpet treatment.

Next time, could you get us a limo at least, Jer?

[screaming]

You can't eat us.

We're famous.

I guess we really are crashing the party.

I don't believe it.

It's Shoshanna.

Do you have your camera?

No time for stargazing.

We are only here to find Captain Hayes.

I think we lost him.

[coughing]

[gasping]

Welcome to the Aqua Vitae Resort, where

the celebrity is always right.

So tell me, why are you famous?

I'm a novelist.

Books?

Don't you know print is dead?

But her new book is being turned

into a blockbuster movie starring everyone who's

anyone, including me, Clover.

Oh, in that case, I'm very pleased to meet you.

I hope you'll enjoy my state of the art hotel.

We've got nightclubs featuring the world's hottest DJs,

fully equipped spas, round-the-clock room service--

all created to keep VIPs like you happy.

This place rocks.

Race you to the spa.

Don't you think we should save Alex and Britney

before you get a facial?

Ugh.

There's always something.

This is your captain speaking.

Welcome aboard.

I have gathered you here in order to save your lives.

You see, I am flooding the world so

that the only survivors will be all the beautiful celebs

here on the Aqua Vitae.

[gasping]

And I'll be the only one who will get

to hang out with all you stars.

[laughing]

He's crazy.

[screaming]

That dude is totally cramping my style.

I'm so out of here.

The problem is we're underwater.

There's no way out.

[screaming]

[laughing]

We've got to find a way to stop the captain

and reverse the flooding.

Let's bust in and take him down.

BRITNEY AND ALEX: Help.

Somebody help us. Behind the door.

Help.

It's Britney and Alex.

Locked.

This calls for some super kick Kung Fu action.

Ow.

Solid steel.

Not good.

Time to make a call.

I can't stand celebrity posers,

especially when they're spies.

Welcome aboard.

Captain Hayes.

You're supposed to be in the WOOHP prison.

And my resort is supposed to be for celebrities only.

That's better.

I hate wasting electricity on a couple of nobodies.

Oh, but don't get your hopes up.

You stowaways are never going to leave here.

Now to get back to my famous new friends.

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Oh.

Ha.

(GASPING) The cell phone's all wet and fizzled out.

Same here. guess we're on the same plan.

Ugh.

You guys really need to work on your rescue techniques.

We can use that inflatable furniture.

Really? But it's so tacky.

I'll use the Wind Tunnel 9,000 to put more air into it--

a lot more air.

[gasping]

[screaming]

It worked.

CROWD: (GASPING) Uh.

What? Huh?

Hey.

Whoa.

(LAUGHING) Does hanging out with celebrities

make me a celebrity too?

All it does is make you a celebrity hanger-on.

Take that back.

They're my friends.

Alex, you and Britney get the celebrities onto the WOOHP sub.

Clover and I'll take care of Captain Misguided over here.

Easier said than done.

Have you met my entourage?

[bell ringing]

Oh.

Since you got us out of the room, you should save him.

No.

You're the president of his online fan club.

You save him.

Will one of you please save me?

And watch the face.

Follow me, and we'll get you out of here.

[screaming]

Faster.

Faster.

Clover, watch out.

Ah.

That's coming out of your pay.

Thanks for the heads-up.

[grunting]

I think you're gonna be needing a wake-up call.

Oh.

The tide may have turned, but I'm not done yet.

Hmm.

I found the master control panel.

Let's see if I can reverse the Earth's flow of water.

That's one way to do it.

Now let's check out of here before we have

to deal with the captain again.

[screaming]

- Position 35267-niner. - Don't worry.

It's gonna be OK.

Yeah.

We'll get you home safely.

[gasping]

It's the underwater hotel.

And apparently it's mobile.

They didn't mention that in the brochure.

I told you my hotel was state of the art.

If I can't hang out with you celebrities, then nobody can.

[laughing]

Say cheese.

Portside.

Oh.

[screaming]

Starboard.

Let's see if that hotel can keep up with this.

I think it's time we got a little bit stealthy.

I think it worked.

We're safe.

Hey.

Do you hear something?

[beeping]

Full speed ahead.

Oh, you celebrities.

We could have been so happy together.

Portside.

[screaming]

If my calculations about the declining sea levels

are correct, the shoreline just might work in our favor.

Might work?

That's not good enough.

I need to call my agent.

This totally isn't cool.

My stunt double isn't even here.

All of you, sit down and fasten your seatbelts.

We've got everything under control.

Get back here.

Everyone, brace yourselves.

[screaming]

[screaming]

Ah.

Can I get just one more autograph?

It's not for me.

Ha.

All the celebs have been returned home safely.

Good work, girls.

You really do make a great team.

And the best part is we're gonna be together forever.

While it's good to see you girls bonding,

I have some important news.

Britney has been transferred to WOOHP Australia.

(GASPING) Oh, no.

Don't be sad.

You guys are my new best friends.

I'll call every single day.

And Britney, we're going to be pairing you up

with superspy Blaine on missions.

Oh, he's cute.

You stay away from my boyfriend.

[grunting]

Oh, I never liked her.

[music playing]